Season	Episode	Season & Episode	Title	Author	Quote
d	d	d	d	d	string
					include=True

01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 There's nothing to tell! He's just some guyI work with!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 C'mon, you're going out with the guy! There'sgotta be something wrong with him!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 All right Joey, benice.  So does he have a hump? A hump and a hairpiece?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Wait, does he eat chalk?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Just, 'cause, I don't want her to go throughwhat I went through with Carl- oh!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Okay, everybody relax. This is not even adate. It's just two people going out to dinner and- not having sex.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Sounds like a date to me.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Alright, so I'm back in high school, I'mstanding in the middle of the cafeteria, and I realize I am totally naked.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Oh, yeah. Had that dream.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Then I look down, and I realize there's aphone... there.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Instead of...?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 That's right.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Never had that dream.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 No.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 All of a sudden, the phone starts to ring.Now I don't know what to do, everybody starts looking at me. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 And they weren't looking atyou before?!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Finally, I figureI'd better answer it, and it turns out it's my mother,which is very-very weird, because- she never calls me!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  Hi.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 This guy says hello, I wanna kill myself.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Are you okay, sweetie?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I just feel like someone reached down mythroat, grabbed my small intestine, pulled it out of my mouth and tied it around myneck...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Cookie?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Carol moved herstuff out today. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Ohh.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Let me get you some coffee.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Thanks.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Ooh! Oh! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 No, no don't! Stop cleansing my aura! No, justleave my aura alone, okay?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Fine!  Be murky!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I'll be fine,alright? Really, everyone. I hope she'll be very happy.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 No you don't.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 No I don't, to hell with her, she left me!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 And you never knew she was a lesbian...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 No!! Okay?! Why does everyone keep fixating onthat? She didn't know, how should I know?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian...  Did I say that out loud?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I told mom and dad last night,they seemed to take it pretty well.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Oh really, so thathysterical phone call I got from a woman at sobbing 3:00 A.M., "I'll never havegrandchildren, I'll never have grandchildren." was what?  A wrong number?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Sorry.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Alright Ross, look. You're feeling a lot ofpain right now. You're angry. You're hurting. Can I tell you what the answer is?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Strip joint! C'mon, you're single! Have somehormones!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I don't want to be single, okay? I just... Ijust- I just wanna be married again!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 And I just want a million dollars! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Rachel?!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh God Monica hi! Thank God! I just went toyour building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might behere and you are, you are!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Waitress	 Can I get you some coffee?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  De-caff.  Okay,everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor.  This is everybody,this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember my brother Ross? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Hi, sure!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Hi. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 So you wanna tell us now, or are we waitingfor four wet bridesmaids?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh God... well, it started about a half hourbefore the wedding. I was in the room where we were keeping all the presents, and I waslooking at this gravy boat. This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. When all of a sudden-Sweet 'n' Lo?- I realized that I was more turnedon by this gravy boat than by Barry! And then I got really freaked out, and that's when ithit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. Potato Head. Y'know, I mean, I always knew lookedfamiliar, but... Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am Idoing this, and who am I doing this for?'.  So anyway I just didn't know whereto go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person Iknew who lived here in the city.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Who wasn't invited to the wedding.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be anissue... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Now I'm guessing that he bought her the bigpipe organ, and she's really not happy about it. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Tuna or egg salad?  Decide!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  I'll havewhatever Christine is having.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	  Daddy, I just... I can't marryhim! I'm sorry. I just don't love him. Well, it matters to me! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  If I let go ofmy hair, my head will fall off. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	  Ooh, she should not be wearingthose pants. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 I say push her down the stairs. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe, Ross, Chandler, Joey	 Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs! Push her down the stairs!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 C'mon Daddy, listen to me! It's like, it'slike, all of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're ashoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be ashoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I'm not saying I want youto buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 You can see where he'd have trouble.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Look Daddy, it's my life. Well maybe I'lljust stay here with Monica. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Well, I guess we've established who'sstaying here with Monica...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Well, maybe that's my decision. Well, maybeI don't need your money. Wait!! Wait, I said maybe!!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Just breathe, breathe.. that's it. Just tryto think of nice calm things...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  Raindrops on roses and rabbits andkittens,  bluebells and sleighbells and- somethingwith mittens... La la la la...something and noodles withstring.  These are a few...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I'm all better now.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  I helped!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Okay, look, this is probably for the best,y'know? Independence. Taking control of your life.  The whole,'hat' thing.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	  And hey, you need anything,you can always come to Joey. Me and Chandler live across the hall. And he's away a lot.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Joey, stop hitting on her! It's her weddingday!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 What, like there's a rule or something?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Please don't do that again, it's ahorrible sound.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	  It's, uh,it's Paul.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Oh God, is it6:30?  Buzz him in!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Who's Paul?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Paul the Wine Guy, Paul?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Maybe. Joey: Wait. Your 'not a realdate' tonight is with Paul the Wine Guy?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 He finally asked you out?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Yes!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Ooh, this is a Dear Diary moment.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Rach, wait, I can cancel...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Please, no, go, that'd be fine!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Are, are you okay? I mean, do youwant me to stay?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  That'd be good...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Really?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  No, go on! It's Paul the WineGuy!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 What does that mean?  Does he sell it, drink it, or just complain a lot? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Hi, come in! Paul, this is.. ... everybody, everybody, this is Paul.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Hey! Paul! Hi! The Wine Guy! Hey!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name. Paul,was it?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Okay, umm-umm, I'lljust--I'll be right back, I just gotta go ah, go ah...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 A wandering?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Change!  Okay,sit down.  Two seconds.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Ooh, I just pulled out four eyelashes. Thatcan't be good.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	  Hey, Paul!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Yeah?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Here's a little tip, shereally likes it when you rub her neck in the same spot over and over and over again untilit starts to get a little red.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Shut up, Joey!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 So Rachel, what're you, uh... what're you upto tonight?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed forAruba on my honeymoon, so nothing!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Right, you're not even getting your honeymoon,God.. No, no, although, Aruba, this time of year... talk about your-  -biglizards... Anyway, if you don't feel like being alone tonight, Joey and Chandler arecoming over to help me put together my new furniture.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	  Yes, and we're very excitedabout it. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Well actually thanks, but I think I'm justgonna hang out here tonight.  It's been kinda a long day.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Okay, sure.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Hey Pheebs, you wanna help?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Oh, I wish I could, but I don't want to.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  Love is sweet assummer showers, love is a wondrous work of art, but your love oh your love, your love...islike a giant pigeon...crapping on my heart.  La-la-la-la-la-  Thank you.  La-la-la-la...ohhh!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  I'msupposed to attach a brackety thing to the side things, using a bunch of these little wormguys. I have no brackety thing, I see no whim guys whatsoever and- I cannot feel my legs.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 I'm thinking we've got abookcase here.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 It's a beautiful thing.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	  What's this?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 I would have tosay that is an 'L'-shaped bracket.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Which goes where?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 I have noidea.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Done with the bookcase!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 All finished!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  This wasCarol's favorite beer. She always drank it out of the can, I should have known.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey-hey, if you'regonna start with that stuff we're outta here.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Yes, please don't spoilall this fun.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Ross, let me ask you a question. She got thefurniture, the stereo, the good TV- what did you get?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 You guys.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Oh, God.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 You got screwed.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Oh my God!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Oh my God!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 I know, I know, I'm such an idiot. I guess Ishould have caught on when she started going to the dentist four and five times a week. Imean, how clean can teeth get?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 My brother's going through that right now,he's such a mess. How did you get through it?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Well, you might try accidentally breakingsomething valuable of hers, say her-
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 -leg?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	  That's one way! Me, I- I went forthe watch.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 You actually broke her watch?  Wow!  The worst thing I ever did was, I-I shredded byboyfriend's favorite bath towel.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Ooh, steer clear of you.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 That's right.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Barry, I'm sorry... I am so sorry... I knowyou probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making lovewith your socks on, but it isn't... it isn't, it's about me, and I ju-  Hi, machine cut me off again... anyway...look,look, I know that some girl is going to be incredibly lucky to become Mrs. Barry Finkel,but it isn't me, it's not me.  And not that I have any idea who me is right now, butyou just have to give me a chance too... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I'm divorced!  I'm only26 and I'm divorced!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Shut up!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 You must stop! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 That only took me an hour.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Look, Ross, you gottaunderstand, between us we haven't had a relationship that has lasted longer than a Mento.  You, however have had the love of a woman for four years.  Four years of closeness and sharing at the end of which she ripped your heart out, andthat is why we don't do it!  I don't think that was my point!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 You know what the scariest part is? What ifthere's only one woman for everybody, y'know? I mean what if you get one woman- and that'sit? Unfortunately in my case, there was only one woman- for her...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 What are you talking about? 'One woman'?That's like saying there's only one flavor of ice cream for you. Lemme tell you something,Ross. There's lots of flavors out there. There's Rocky Road, and Cookie Dough, and Bing!Cherry Vanilla. You could get 'em with Jimmies, or nuts, or whipped cream! This is thebest thing that ever happened to you! You got married, you were, like, what, eight?Welcome back to the world! Grab a spoon!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I honestly don't know if I'm hungry or horny.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Stay out of my freezer! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Ever since she walked out on me, I, uh...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 What?..... What, you wanna spell it out withnoodles?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 No, it's, it's more of a fifth date kindarevelation.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Oh, so there is gonna be a fifth date?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Isn't there?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Yeah... yeah, I think there is. -What wereyou gonna say?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Well, ever-ev-... ever since she left me, um,I haven't been able to, uh, perform.  ...Sexually. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Oh God, ohGod, I am sorry... I am so sorry...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 It's okay...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I know being spit on is probably not whatyou need right now. Um... how long?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Two years.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Wow! I'm-I'm-I'm glad you smashed her watch!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 So you still think you, um... might want thatfifth date?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 ...Yeah. Yeah, I do.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Priest On Tv	We are gathered here today to join Joanne Louise Cunningham andCharles, Chachi-Chachi-Chachi, Arcola in the bound of holy matrimony.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh...see... but Joanne loved Chachi! That'sthe difference!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	  Grab a spoon. Do you know how longit's been since I've grabbed a spoon? Do the words 'Billy, don't be a hero' mean anythingto you? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Great story!  But, I uh,I gotta go, I got a date with Andrea--Angela--Andrea...  Oh man, 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Angela's the screamer,Andrea has cats.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Right.  Thanks. It's June.  I'm outta here. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Y'know, here's the thing. Even if I could getit together enough to- to ask a woman out,... who am I gonna ask? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Isn't this amazing? I mean, I have nevermade coffee before in my entire life.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 That is amazing.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Congratulations. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Y'know, I figure if I canmake coffee, there isn't anything I can't do.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 If can invade Poland,there isn't anything I can't do.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Listen, while you're on a roll, if you feellike you gotta make like a Western omelet or something...  Although actually I'm really not thathungry...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Ohgood, Lenny and Squigy are here.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Morning. Good morning.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Morning.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Morning, Paul.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Hello, Paul.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Hi, Paul, is it?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Thank you!  Thank you somuch!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Stop!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 No, I'm telling you last nightwas like umm, all my birthdays, both graduations, plus the barn raising scene in Witness.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 We'll talk later.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Paul	 Yeah.  Thank you. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 That wasn't a real date?! What the hell do youdo on a real date?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Shut up, and put my table back.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Okayyy! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 All right, kids, I gotta get to work. If Idon't input those numbers,... it doesn't make much of a difference... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 So, like, you guys all have jobs?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Yeah, we all have jobs. See, that's how webuy stuff.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Yeah, I'm an actor.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Wow! Would I have seen you in anything?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 I doubt it. Mostly regional work.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Oh wait, wait, unless you happened to catchthe Reruns' production of Pinocchio, at the little theater in thepark.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Look, it was a job all right?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 'Look, Gippetto, I'm a real live boy.'
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 I will not take this abuse. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 You're right, I'm sorry.  "Once I was a wooden boy, a little wooden boy..."
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 You should both know,that he's a dead man.  Oh, Chandler?  
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 So how you doing today? Did you sleep okay?Talk to Barry? I can't stop smiling.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I can see that. You look like you slept witha hanger in your mouth.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I know, he's just so, so... Do you rememberyou and Tony DeMarco?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh, yeah.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Well, it's like that. With feelings.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh wow. Are you in trouble.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Big time!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Want a wedding dress?  Hardly used.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I think we are gettinga little ahead of selves here. Okay. Okay. I am just going to get up, go to workand not think about him all day. Or else I'm just gonna get up and go to work.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh, look, wish me luck!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 What for?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I'm gonna go get one of those  jobthings.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Frannie	 Hey, Monica! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Hey Frannie, welcome back! How was Florida? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Frannie	 You had sex, didn't you? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 How do you do that?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Frannie	 Oh, I hate you, I'm pushing my Aunt Roz throughParrot Jungle and you're having sex!  So? Who? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 You know Paul? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Frannie	 Paul the Wine Guy? Oh yeah, I know Paul. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 You mean you know Paul like I know Paul? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Frannie	 Are you kidding? I take credit for Paul. Y'know before me, there was nosnap in his turtle for two years. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Of course it was a line! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Why?! Why? Why, why would anybody do something like that? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I assume we're looking for an answer more sophisticated than 'to get youinto bed'. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I hate men!  I hate men!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Oh no, don't hate, you don'twant to put that out into the universe.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Is it me? Is it like I have some sort ofbeacon that only dogs and men with severe emotional problems can hear? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 All right, c'mere, gimme your feet.  
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I just thought he was nice, y'know? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	  I can't believe you didn't know it was a line!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Guess what? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 You got a job? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Are you kidding? I'm trained for nothing! I was laughed out of twelveinterviews today. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 And yet you're surprisingly upbeat. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 You would be too if you found John and David boots on sale, fiftypercent off! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Oh, how well you know me... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've gotgreat boots' boots! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 How'd you pay for them? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Uh, credit card. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 And who pays for that? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Um... my... father. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Oh God, come on youguys, is this really necessary?  I mean, I can stop charging anytime I want. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 C'mon, you can't live off your parents your whole life. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I know that. That's why I was getting married. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Give her a break, it's hard being on your own for the first time. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Thank you. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 You're welcome. I remember when I first came to this city. I wasfourteen. My mom had just killed herself and my step-dad was back in prison, and I gothere, and I didn't know anybody. And I ended up living with this albino guy who was, like,cleaning windshields outside port authority, and then he killed himself, and then I foundaromatherapy. So believe me, I know exactly how you feel. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 The word you're looking for is 'Anyway'... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 All right, you ready?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 No.  No, no, I'm notready!  How can I be ready?  "Hey, Rach!  You ready to jump out theairplane without your parachute?"  Come on, I can't do this!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 You can, I know youcan! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I don't think so.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Come on, you madecoffee!   You can do anything! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 C'mon, cut. Cut, cut, cut,... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Y'know what?  I thinkwe can just leave it at that.  It's kinda like a symbolic gesture...
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Rachel! That was a library card! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut..
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	  Y'know, if you listen closely, you can hear a thousand retailers scream. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Welcome to the real world! It sucks. You'regonna love it! 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 Well, that's it  You gonna crash on the couch? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 No. No, I gotta go home sometime. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 You be okay? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Yeah. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor.  What? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 That's Paul's watch. You just put it back where you found it. Oh boy.Alright. Goodnight, everybody. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross, Rachel	 Goodnight.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Mmm.  Oh, no- 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Sorry- 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 No no no, go- 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 No, you have it, really, I don't want it- 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Split it? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Okay. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Okay.  You know you probably didn't know this, but back inhigh school, I had a, um, major crush on you. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I knew. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geekyolder brother. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I did. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerabilitybecome any kind of a factor here- but do you think it would be okay if I asked you out?Sometime? Maybe? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Okay... okay, maybe I will... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Goodnight. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 Goodnight. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 See ya.... Waitwait, what's with you? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 I just grabbed a spoon.  
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 I can't believe what I'm hearing here. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  I can't believe what I'm hearing here... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 What? I-I said you had a- 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	  What I said you had... 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	  Would you stop? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Phoebe	 Oh, was I doing it again?
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Yes!
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Monica	 I said that you had a nicebutt, it's just not a great butt.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Joey	 Oh, you wouldn't know a greatbutt if it came up and bit ya.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Ross	 There's an image.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	  Would anybody like more coffee? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Did you make it, or are you just serving it? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 I'm just serving it. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	All	 Yeah. Yeah, I'll have a cup of coffee. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Kids, new dream... I'm in Las Vegas. 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Customer	  Ahh, miss?   More coffee? 
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Rachel	 Ugh.  Excuse me, could you givethis to that guy over there?  Go ahead.  Thankyou.  Sorry.  Okay, Las Vegas.
01	01	0101	The One Where Monica Gets A Roommate	Chandler	 Okay, so, I'm in LasVegas... I'm Liza Minelli- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 What you guys don't understand is, for us,kissing is as important as any part of it. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 Yeah, right!.......Y'serious? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Everything you need to know is in that first kiss. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Absolutely. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Yeah, I think for us, kissing is pretty much like an opening act,y'know? I mean it's like the stand-up comedian you have to sit through before Pink Floydcomes out. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Yeah, and-and it's not that we don't like the comedian, it's that-that...that's not why we bought the ticket. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 The problem is, though, after the concert's over, no matter how greatthe show was, you girls are always looking for the comedian again, y'know? I mean, we'rein the car, we're fighting traffic... basically just trying to stay awake. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. Otherwise next timeyou're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 ....Are we still talking about sex?
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 No, it's good, it is good, it's just that- mm- doesn't she seem a littleangry? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Marsha	 Well, she has issues. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Does she. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Marsha	 He's out banging other women over the head with a club, while she sitsat home trying to get the mastodon smell out of the carpet! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Marsha, these are cave people. Okay? They have issues like 'Gee, thatglacier's getting kinda close.' See? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Marsha	 Speaking of issues, isn't that your ex-wife? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	  No. No. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Marsha	 Yes, it is. Carol! Hi! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Okay, okay, yes, it is.  How about I'll, uh, catch up with you inthe Ice Age. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	Hi. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 So. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 You look great. I, uh... I hate that. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Sorry. You look good too. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Ah, well, in here, anyone who... stands erect... So what's new? Still,uh... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 A lesbian? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well... you never know. How's, um.. how's the family? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Marty's still totally paranoid. Oh, and, uh- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Why- why are you here, Carol? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 I'm pregnant. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Pregnant?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Oh, I think this is the episode of Three'sCompany where there's some kind of misunderstanding. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	...Then I've already seen this one!  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	  Are you through with that? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 Yeah, sorry, the swallowing slowed me down. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Whose little ball of paper is this?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Oh, uh, that would be mine. See, I wrote a note to myself, and then Irealised I didn't need it, so I balled it up and... ...now I wish I was dead. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 She's already fluffed that pillow... Monica, you know, you've alreadyfluffed that-  -but, it's fine! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Look , I'm sorry, guys, I just don't wanna give them any more ammunitionthan they already have. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Yes, and we all know how cruel a parent can be about the flatness of achild's pillow. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Monica- Hi! Um, Monica, you're scaring me. I mean, you're like, you'relike all chaotic and twirly. And not-not in a good way. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 Yeah, calm down. You don't see Ross getting all chaotic and twirly everytime they come. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 That's because as far as my parents are concerned, Ross can do no wrong.Y'see, he's the Prince. Apparently they had some big ceremony before I was born. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	  Ew, ew, ew, ew ew ew ew ew! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 What? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Ugly Naked Guy got a Thighmaster! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	All	 Eeaagh! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Has anybody seen my engagement ring? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's beautiful. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh God, oh God, oh God oh God oh God oh God....  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 No, look, don't touch that! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough, having to give it back tohim... 'Hi Barry! Remember me? I'm the girl in the veil who stomped on your heart in frontof your entire family!' Oh God and now I'm gonna have to return the ring, without thering, which makes it so much harder... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Easy Rach, we'll find it.  Won't we! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler, Joey	 Oh! Yeah!
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 Alright, when'd'ya have it on last?
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Doy! Probably right before she lost it! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 You don't get a lot of 'doy' these days... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in thekitchen with... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 ...Dinah? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	  Ohhhhh, don't be mad... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 You didn't. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh, I am sorry... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 I gave you one job!  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh, but look how straight those noodles are! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Now, Monica, you know that's not how you look for an engagement ringin a lasagne... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	  I just... can't do it. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Boys? We're going in. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 .....Hi. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Wow. That is not a happy hi. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Carol's pregnant. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	  Ooh! I found it! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 W-w-wh-... wha-... w-w-w-... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Yeah. Do that for another two hours, you might be where I am right aboutnow.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Kinda puts that whole pillow thing in perspective, huh, Mon? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Well now, how-how do you fit into this whole thing? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well, Carol says she and Susan want me to be involved, but if I'm notcomfortable with it, I don't have to be involved.. basically it's entirely up to me. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 She is so great! I miss her. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 What does she mean by 'involved'? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 I mean presumably, the biggest part of your job is done. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Anyway, they want me to go down to this- sonogram thing with themtomorrow. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 So what are you gonna do? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 I have no idea. No matter what I do, though, I'm still gonna be a father. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 .....Well, this is still ruined, right?
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, Martha Ludwin's daughter is gonna call you. Mmm! What's that curry taste? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Curry. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Mmmm! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 I- I think they're great! I, I really do. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mr. Geller	  Do you remember the Ludwins? The big one had a thing foryou, didn't she? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 They all had a thing for him. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Aw, Mom... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 I'm sorry, why is this girl going to call me? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, she just graduated, and she wants to be something in cooking,or food, or.... I don't know. Anyway, I told her you had a restaurant- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 No Mom, I don't have a restaurant, I work in a restaurant. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Well, they don't have to know that...  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Ross, could you come and help me with the spaghetti, please? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Yeah.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, we're having spaghetti! That's.... easy. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 I know this is going to sound unbelievably selfish, but, were youplanning on bringing up the whole baby/lesbian thing? Because I think it might take someof the heat off me. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 What that Rachel did to her life.... We ran into her parents at theclub, they were not playing very well. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mr. Geller	 I'm not gonna tell you what they spent on that wedding... but fortythousand dollars is a lot of money! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Well, at least she had the chance to leave a man at the altar... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 What's that supposed to mean? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	 Nothing! It's an expression. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 No it's not. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mr. Geller	 Don't listen to your mother. You're independent, and you always havebeen! Even when you were a kid... and you were chubby, and you had no friends, you werejust fine! And you would read alone in your room, and your puzzles... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mr. Geller	 Look, there are people like Ross whoneed to shoot for the stars, with his museum, and his papers getting published. Otherpeople are satisfied with staying where they are- I'm telling you, these are the peoplewho never get cancer. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mr. Geller	 ...And I read about these women trying to have it all, and I thankGod 'Our Little Harmonica' doesn't seem to have that problem. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	  So, Ross, what's going onwith you? Any stories?  No news, no little anecdotes toshare with the folks? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	  Okay! Okay.  Look, I, uh- I realiseyou guys have been wondering what exactly happened between Carol and me, and, so, well,here's the deal. Carol's a lesbian. She's living with a woman named Susan. She's pregnantwith my child, and she and Susan are going to raise the baby. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Mrs. Geller	  And you knew about this?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 Your folks are really that bad, huh? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well, y'know, these people are pros. They know what they're doing, theytake their time, they get the job done. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Boy, I know they say you can't change your parents,... boy, if youcould-  -I'd want yours. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Must pee.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Y'know, it's even worse when you're twins. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 You're twins? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Yeah. We don't speak. She's like this high-powered, driven career type. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 What does she do? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 She's a waitress. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 All right, you guys, I kinda gotta clean up now.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Chandler, you're an only child, right? You don't have any of this. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 Well, no, although I did have an imaginary friend, who... my parentsactually preferred. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 The lights, please..
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 ...How long was I in there? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 I'm just cleaning up. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 D'ya.. uh.. d'ya need any help? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Uh.. okay, sure! Thanks!  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Anyway.. um..  So, you- uh- you nervous about Barrytomorrow? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh.. a little.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Mm-hmm.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 A lot. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Mm. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 So, got any advice? Y'know, as someone who's recently been- dumped? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well, you may wanna steer clear of the word 'dumped'. Chances are he'sgonna be this, this broken shell of a man, y'know, so you should try not to look tooterrific, I know it'll be hard. Or, y'know, uh, hey!, I'll go down there, and I'll giveBarry back his ring, and you can go with Carol and Susan to the OB/GYN... 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh, you've got Carol tomorrow.. When did it get so complicated? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Got me. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Remember when we were in high school together? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Yeah. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love-and that'd be it?  ..Ross? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Yes, yes! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh! Man, I never thought I'd be here..  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Me either...  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	  Sorry I'm late, I was stuck at work. There was this bigdinosaur.. thing.. anyway. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Hi. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Ross, you remember Susan. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 How could I forget? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Ross. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	  Hello, Susan.  Good shake. Good shake. So,uh, we're just waiting for...? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Dr. Oberman. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 ..Dr. Oberman. Okay. And is he- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 She. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 -she, of course, she- uh- familiar with our.. special situation? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Yes, and she's very supportive. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Okay, that's great.  No, I'm- Oh.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Thanks. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	  Quack, quack.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Ross? That opens my cervix.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Barry? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 C'mon in. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	  Are you sure? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Yeah! It's fine, it's fine. Robbie's gonna be here for hours. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Robbie	 Huh?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 So, how ya doin? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 I'm- uh- I'm okay... You look great! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Yeah, well.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Bernice	  Dr. Farber, Jason Greenstein's gagging. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	  Be right there.  Be backin a sec. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 I dumped him. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Robbie	 Okay. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 So, um- so how's this, uh, how's this gonna work? Y'know, with us? Y'know,when, like, important decisions have to be made? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Give me a 'for instance'. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well, uh, uh, I don't know, okay, okay, how about with the, uh, with thebaby's name? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Marlon- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Marlon?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 -if it's a boy, Minnie if it's a girl. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 ...As in Mouse? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 As in my grandmother. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Still, you- you say Minnie, you hear Mouse. Um, how about, um.. how aboutJulia? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Julia.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 We agreed on Minnie. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 'S'funny, um, uh, we agreed we'd spend the rest of our lives together.Things change, roll with the punches. I believe Julia's on the table..? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Sorry about that. So. What have you been up to? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh, not much. I-I got a job. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Oh, that's great. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Why are- why are you so tanned? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Oh, I, uh- I went to Aruba. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh no. You went on our honeymoon alone? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 No. I went with, uh.. Now, this may hurt. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Robbie	 Me?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 No!  I went with Mindy. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Mindy?! My maid of honour, Mindy?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Yeah, well, uh, we're kind of a thing now. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Oh! Well, um..  You've got plugs! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Careful! They haven't quite taken yet. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 And you've got lenses! But you hate sticking your finger in your eye! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Not for her. Listen, I really wanted to thank you. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Okay.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 See, about a month ago, I wanted to hurt you. More than I've ever wantedto hurt anyone in my life. And I'm an orthodontist. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Wow. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 You know, you were right? I mean, I thought we were happy. We weren'thappy. But with Mindy, now I'm happy. Spit. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 What? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Robbie	 Me.  
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	 Anyway, um,  I guess this belongs toyou. And thank you for giving it to me. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Barry	 Well, thank you for giving it back. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Robbie	 Hello?! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Oh, please! What's wrong with Helen? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Helen Geller? I don't think so. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Hello? It's not gonna be Helen Geller. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Thank you! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 No, I mean it's not Geller. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 What, it's gonna be Helen Willick? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 No, actually, um, we talked about Helen Willick-Bunch. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well, wait a minute, wha- why is she in the title? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 It's my baby too. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Oh, 's'funny, really? Um, I don't remember you making any sperm. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Yeah, and we all know what a challenge that is! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 All right, you two, stop it! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 No no no, she gets a credit, hey, I'm in there too. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 Ross. You're not actually suggesting Helen Willick-Bunch-Geller? 'Cause Ithink that borders on child abuse. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Of course not, I'm... suggesting Geller-Willick-Bunch. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Oh, no, nonononono, you see what he's doing? He knows no-one's gonna sayall those names, so they'll wind up calling her Geller, then he gets his way! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 My way?! You-you think this is my way? Believe me, of all the ways I everimagined this moment in my life being, this is not my way- y'know what? Uh, um, this istoo hard. I'm not, I can't do- 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Dr. Oberman	  Knock knock!How are we today? Any nausea? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	All	 Yeah. Yeah. A little. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Dr. Oberman	 Well, I was just wondering about the mother-to-be, but.. thanks forsharing.  Uh, lie back.. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 You- uh- y'know what, I'm gonna go. I don't- I don't think I can beinvolved in this particular thing right now. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Oh my God. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Susan	 Look at that. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Carol	 I know. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Well? Isn't that amazing? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Joey	 What are we supposed to be seeing here? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Chandler	 I dunno, but.. I think it's about to attack the Enterprise. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 You know, if you tilt your head to the left, and relax your eyes, itkinda looks like an old potato. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Then don't do that, alright? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Phoebe	 Okay! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Monica. Whaddya think? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	  Mm-hmm. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 Wh- are you welling up? 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 No. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 You are, you're welling up. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	 Am not! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Ross	 You're gonna be an aunt. 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Monica	  Oh shut up! 
01	02	0102	The One With The Sonogram At The End	Rachel	  Hi, Mindy. Hi, it-it's Rachel. Yeah, I'm fine. I-I saw Barrytoday. Oh, yeah, yeah he-he told me. No, no, it's okay. I hope you two are very happy, Ireally do. Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if-if everything works out, and you guys end upgetting married and having kids- and everything- I just hope they have his old hairlineand your old nose.   Okay, I know it was a cheap shot,but I feel so much better now. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	  Hi guys! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Hey, Pheebs! Hi! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hey. Oh, oh, how'd it go? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Um, not so good. He walked me to the subway and said 'We should do thisagain!' 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Ohh. Ouch. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 What? He said 'we should do it again', that's good, right? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Uh, no. Loosely translated 'We should do this again' means 'You willnever see me naked'. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Since when? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Since always. It's like dating language. Y'know, like 'It's not you' means'It is you'. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Or 'You're such a nice guy' means 'I'm gonna be dating leather-wearingalcoholics and complaining about them to you'. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Or, or, y'know, um, 'I think we should see other people' means 'Ha, ha,I already am'. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 And everybody knows this? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Yeah. Cushions the blow. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Yeah, it's like when you're a kid, and your parents put your dog tosleep, and they tell you it went off to live on some farm. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 That's funny, that, no, because, uh, our parents actually did, uh, sendour dog off to live on a farm. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Uh, Ross. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 What? Wh- hello? The Millners' farm in Connecticut? The Millners, they hadthis unbelievable farm, they had horses, and, and rabbits that he could chase and it was-it w- .....Oh my God, Chi Chi! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 "So how does it feel knowing you're about to die?" 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 "Warden, in five minutes my pain will be over. But you'll have tolive with the knowledge that you sent an honest man to die." 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Hey, that was really good! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Thanks! Let's keep going. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Okay. "So. Whaddya want from me, Damone, huh?" 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 "I just wanna go back to my cell. 'Cause in my cell, I cansmoke." 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 "Smoke away." 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 I think this is probably why Damone smokes in his cell alone. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 What? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Relax your hand! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Not so much! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Whoah! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Hey! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Hey! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Alright, now try taking a puff. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Alright.. okay. No. Give it to me. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 No no no, I am not giving you a cigarette. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 It's fine, it's fine. Look, do you wanna get this part, or not? Here. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Don't think of it as a cigarette. Think of it as the thing that's beenmissing from your hand. When you're holding it, you feel right. You feel complete. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Y'miss it? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Nah, not so much. Alright, now we smoke.  Oh.. my..God.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 No, no, no. They say it's the same as the distance from the tip of aguy's thumb to the tip of his index finger. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 That's ridiculous! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Can I use.. either thumb? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	  Alright, don't tell me, don't tell me! Decaf cappucino for Joey.. Coffee black.. Late.. And an icedtea. I'm getting pretty good at this! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Yeah. Yeah, excellent. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	  Good for me! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Y'okay, Phoebe? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Yeah- no- I'm just- it's, I haven't worked- It's my bank. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 What did they do to you? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 It's nothing, it's just- Okay. I'm going through my mail, and I open uptheir monthly, you know, STATEMENT- 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Easy. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 - and there's five hundred extra dollars in my account. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Oh, Satan's minions at work again... 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Yes, 'cause now I have to go down there, and deal with them. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 What are you talking about? Keep it! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 It's not mine, I didn't earn it, if I kept it, it would be likestealing. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Yeah, but if you spent it, it would be like shopping! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Okay. Okay, let's say I bought a really great pair of shoes. Do you knowwhat I'd hear, with every step I took? 'Not-mine. Not-mine. Not-mine.' And even if I washappy, okay, and, and skipping- 'Not-not-mine, not-not-mine, not-not-mine,not-not-mine'... 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 We're with you. We got it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Okay. I'd- just- I'd never be able to enjoy it. It would be like thisgiant karmic debt. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Chandler, what are you doing? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Hey. Whaddya doing? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Oh! Oh, God! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 What is this?! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 I'm smoking. I'm smoking, I'm smoking. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Oh, I can't believe you! You've been so good, for three years! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 And this- is my reward! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hold on a second, alright? Just think about what you went through the lasttime you quit. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Okay, so this time I won't quit! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Ohhh! Put it out! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 All right! I'm putting it out, I'm putting it out.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Oh, no! I- I can't drink this now! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Alright. I'm gonna go change, I've got a date. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 This Alan again? How's it goin'? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 'S'going pretty good, y'know? It's nice, and, we're having fun. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 So when do we get to meet the guy? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Let's see, today's Monday... Never. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Oh, come on! Come on! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 No. Not after what happened with Steve. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy!..Sorry. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Look, I don't even know how I feel about him yet. Just give me a chanceto figure that out. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Well, then can we meet him? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Nope. Schhorry. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I mean, why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, andwithin five minutes they're all over him. I mean, they're like- coyotes, picking off theweak members of the herd. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 Listen. As someone who's seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I'lltell you: that is not such a terrible thing. I mean, they're your friends, they're justlooking out after you. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I know. I just wish that once, I'd bring a guy home that they actuallyliked. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 Well, you do realise the odds of that happening are a little slimmer ifthey never get to meet the guy.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Let it go, Ross. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Yeah, well, you didn't know Chi Chi. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Do you all promise? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Yeah! We promise! We'll be good! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Chandler? Do you promise to be good? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to stay outside! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hey, Pheebs. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 'Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our error. We havecredited your account with five hundred dollars. We're sorry for the inconvenience, andhope you'll accept this-  -football phone as our free gift.'Do you believe this?! Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 What bank is this? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Hey. It's him.  Who is it? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	  It's Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	  Chandler! He's here! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Okay, please be good, please. Just remember how much youall like me. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	 Hi. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Hi, Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	 I've heard schho much about all you guyschh! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Thanks. I'll call you tomorrow.  Okay.Okay, let's let the Alan-bashing begin. Who's gonna take the first shot, hmm? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 C'mon! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 ...I'll go. Let's start with the way he kept picking at- no, I'm sorry, Ican't do this, can't do this. We loved him. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Loved him! Yeah! He's great! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Wait a minute! We're talking about someone that I'm going outwith? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Yeah! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 And did you notice...?  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	The Guys	  Yeah. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Know what was great? The way his smile was kinda crooked. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Yes, yes! Like the man in the shoe! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 ...What shoe? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 From the nursery rhyme. 'There was a crooked man, Who had a crookedsmile, Who lived in a shoe, For a... while...' 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 ...So I think Alan will become the yardstick against which all futureboyfriends will be measured. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 What future boyfriends? Nono, I th- I think this could be, y'know, it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Really! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Oh, yeah. I'd marry him just for his David Hasselhof impression alone.You know I'm gonna be doing that at parties, right?  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 You know what I like most about him, though? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 What? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 The way he makes me feel about myself. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Yeah... 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Hi.. how was the game? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Well.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 WE WON!! Thank you! Yes! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Fantastic! I have one question: How is that possible? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 He was unbelievable. He was like that-that-that Bugs Bunny cartoon whereBugs is playing all the positions, right, but instead of Bugs it was first base-Alan,second base-Alan, third base-... 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 I mean, it-it was like, it was like he made us into a team. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or two aboutsoftball.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Can I ask you guys a question? D'you ever think that Alan is maybe..sometimes.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 What? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 ..I dunno, a little too Alan? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Well, no. That's impossible. You can never be too Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Yeah, it's his, uh, innate Alan-ness that-that-that we adore. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 I personally could have a gallon of Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Hey, Lizzie. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Hey, Weird Girl. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 I brought you alphabet soup. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Did you pick out the vowels? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Yes. But I left in the Ys. 'Cause, y'know, "sometimes y". Uh,I also have something else for you.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Saltines? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 No, but would you like a thousand dollars and a football phone? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 What?  Oh my God, there'sreally money in here. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 I know. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Weird Girl, what are you doing? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 No, I want you to have it. I don't want it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 No, no, I ha-I have to give you something. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Oh, that's fine, no. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Would you like my tin-foil hat? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 No. 'Cause you need that. No, it's okay, thanks. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Please, let me do something. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Okay, alright, you buy me a soda, and then we're even. Okay? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Okay. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Okay. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	 Keep the change.  Sure you don't wanna pretzel? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 No, I'm fine. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Lizzie	  See ya. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Huh! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 A thumb?! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Eww! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 I know! I know, I opened it up and there it was, just floating in there,like this tiny little hitch-hiker! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Well, maybe it's a contest, y'know? Like, collect all five? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Does, um, anyone wanna see? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Nooo! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Oh, hey, don't do that! Cut it out! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 It's worse than the thumb! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Hey, this is so unfair! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Oh, why is it unfair? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 So I have a flaw! Big deal! Like Joey's constant knuckle-crackingisn't annoying? And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word? And Monica, withthat snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing? ...I accept all thoseflaws, why can't you accept me for this? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 ...Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Well, I-I could live without it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Well, is it, like, a little annoying, or is it like when Phoebe chews herhair? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Oh, now, don't listen to him, Pheebs, I think it's endearing. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Oh,  "you do, do you"? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 You know, there's nothing wrong with speaking correctly. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 "Indeed there isn't"... I should really get back to work. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Yeah, 'cause otherwise someone might get what they actually ordered. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Ohh-ho-hooohhh. The hair comes out, and the gloves come on. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Did you ever go out with a guy your friends all really like? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 No. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Okay.. Well, I'm going out with a guy my friends all really like. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 Waitwait.. we talking about the coyotes here? All right, a cow gotthrough! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Can you believe it? ...Y'know what? I just don't feel the thing.I mean, they feel the thing, I don't feel the thing. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 Honey.. you should always feel the thing. Listen, if that's howyou feel about the guy, Monica, dump him! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I know.. it's gonna be really hard. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Paula	 Well, he's a big boy, he'll get over it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 No, he'll be fine. It's the other five I'm worried about. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Do you have any respect for your body? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Don't you realise what you're-you're doing to yourself? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Hey, y'know, I have had it with you guys and your cancer and youremphysema and your heart disease. The bottom line is, smoking is cool, and you know it. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	  Chandler? It's Alan, he wants tospeak to you. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Really? He does?  Hey, buddy, what's up! Oh, shetold you about that, huh. Well, yeah, I have one now and then. Well, yeah, now. Well, it'snot that big- ..well, that's true,.. Gee, y'know, no-one- no-one's ever put it like thatbefore. Well, okay, thanks!  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	  God, he's good. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 If only he were a woman. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Yeah. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Ooh, Lambchop. How old is that sock? If I had a sock on my hand forthirty years it'd be talking too. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Okay. I think it's time to change somebody's nicotine patch.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Hey. Where's Joey? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 Joey ate my last stick of gum, so I killed him. Do you think that waswrong? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 I think he's across the hall. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Thanks.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	  There y'go. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	  Ooh, I'm alive with pleasure now. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, you gonna have the rest of that Pop-Tart?.. Pheebs? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Does anyone want the rest of this Pop-Tart? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hey, I might! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Sorry. ..Y'know, those stupid soda people gave me seven thousand dollarsfor the thumb. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 You're kidding. Oh my God. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 And on my way over here, I stepped in gum. ...What is up with theuniverse?! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	  What's goingon? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Nothing. I just think it's nice when we're all here together. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Even nicer when everyone gets to wear their underwear.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Uh, Joey.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Oh, God!  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Okay.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Oh! That was Lambchop! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Please, guys, we have to talk. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Wait, wait, I'm getting a deja vu...no, I'm not. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Alright, we have to talk. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 There it is! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Okay. It's-it's about Alan. There's something that you should know. Imean, there's really no easy way to say this.. uh.. I've decided to break up with Alan. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Is there somebody else? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 No, nononono.. it's just.. things change. People change. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 We didn't change.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 So that's it? It's over? Just like that? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 You know.. you let your guard down, you start to really care aboutsomeone, and I just- I-  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Look, I- I could go on pretending- 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Joey	 Okay! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 -but that wouldn't be fair to me, it wouldn't be fair to Alan- Itwouldn't be fair to you! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Who-who wants fair? Y'know, I just want things back. Y'know, the way theywere. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I'm sorry.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	  Oh, she's sorry! I feel better! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	  I just can't believe this! I mean, with the holidays comingup- I wanted him to meet my family- 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I'll meet somone else. There'll be other Alans. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Oh, yeah! Right! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Are you guys gonna be okay? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Hey hey, we'll be fine. We're just gonna need a little time. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  I understand. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	 Wow. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 I'm, I'm really sorry. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	 Yeah, I'm sorry too. But, I gotta tell you, I am a little relieved. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Relieved? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Alan	 Yeah, well, I had a great time with you.. I just can't stand your friends.
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Rachel	 Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?.. That was fun. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 Yeah. He could row like a viking. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	  Hi. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 Mmm. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 So how'd it go? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 Oh, y'know.. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	 Did he mention us? 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Monica	 He said he's really gonna miss you guys.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Ross	 You had a rough day, huh.. c'mere.  
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	 ...That's it. I'm getting cigarettes. 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	All	 No no no! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	  I don't care, I don't care! Game's over! I'm weak! I'vegotta smoke! I've gotta have the smoke! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Phoebe	  If you never smoke again I'll give you seventhousand dollars! 
01	03	0103	The One With The Thumb	Chandler	  Yeah, alright.
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Alright. Phoebe? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Okay, okay. If I were omnipotent for a day,I would want, um, world peace, no more hunger, good things for the rain-forest...Andbigger boobs! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Yeah, see.. you took mine. Chandler, whatabout you? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Uh, if I were omnipotent for a day, I'd..make myself omnipotent forever. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 See, there's always one guy. "If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes."  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	All	 Hey Joey. Hi. Hey, buddy. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Hey, Joey, what would you do if you wereomnipotent? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Probably kill myself! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 ..Excuse me? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Hey, if Little Joey's dead, then I got noreason to live! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Joey, uh- OMnipotent. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 You are? Ross, I'm sorry.. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 How does she do that? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 I cannot sleep in a public place. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Would you look at her? She is so peaceful. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	  Oh! What whatwhat! ...Hi. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 It's okay, y'know, you just nodded off again. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 What's going on with you? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 I got no sleep last night! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Why? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 My grandmother has this new boyfriend, andthey're both kind of insecure in bed. Oh, and deaf. So they're constantly, like, having toreassure each other that they're having a good time. You have no idea how loud they are! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Well, if you want, you can stay with Racheland me tonight. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Thanks. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 ...Ninety-five, ninety-six, ninety-seven. See,I told you! Less than a hundred steps from our place to here. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 You got waaaay too much free time. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	  Hey! Here's the birthday boy! Ross,check it out: hockey tickets, Rangers-Penguins, tonight at the Garden, and we're takingyou. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Happy birthday, pal! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 We love you, man.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Funny, my birthday was seven months ago. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 So? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 So, I'm guessing you had an extra ticket andcouldn't decide which one of you got to bring a date? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Well, aren't we Mr. "The glass ishalf empty." 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Oh my God, oh- is today the twentieth, Octobertwentieth? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Oh, I was hoping you wouldn't remember. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Ohhh. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 What's wrong with the twentieth? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Eleven days before Halloween.. all thegood costumes are gone? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Today's the day Carol and I first..consummated our physical relationship.  Sex. ..You know what, I-I'dbetter pass on the game. I think I'm just gonna go home and think about my ex-wife and herlesbian lover. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 The hell with hockey, let's all do that! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	  C'mon, Ross!You, me, Joey, ice, guys' night out, c'mon, whaddya say, big guy,  Huh? Huh? Huh? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 What are you doing? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	  I have no idea. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 C'mon, Ross! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Alright, alright, maybe it'll take my mind offit. Do you promise to buy me a big thumb finger? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 You got it.
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Look-look-look-look-look, my first paycheck! Look at the window, there's my name! Hi, me! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 I remember the day I got my first pay check.There was a cave in in one of the mines, and eight people were killed. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Wow, you worked in a mine? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 I worked in a Dairy Queen, why? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 God, isn't this exciting? I earned this. Iwiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totallynot worth it. Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money? I mean, what-Chandler, look at that. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	  Oh, this is not that bad. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Oh, you're fine, yeah, for a first job. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 You can totally, totally live on this. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Yeah, yeah. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Oh, by the way, great servicetonight. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	All	 Oh! Yeah! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Guys	 Hockey!  Hockey! Hockey.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Leslie	  Rachel? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Oh my God! (Rachel, Leslie, Kiki, and Joanneall scream and hug each other. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	  I swear I've seen birds do thison Wild Kingdom. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 What are you guys doing here? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kiki	 Well, we were in the city shopping,and your mom said you work here, aaand it's true! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joanne	 Look at you in the apron.You look like you're in a play. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	  Look at you, you areso big I can't believe it! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Leslie	 I know. I know! I'm a duplex. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	  So what's going on with you? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joanne	 Well, guess who my dad'smaking partner in his firm?  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kiki	 And while we're on the subject ofnews..  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	  Look, look, I have elbows! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 ...Poulet passes it up to Leetch!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Leetch spots Messier in the crease- there'sthe pass!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 We'll take a brief time out while Messierstops to look at some women's shoes. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Carol was wearing boots just like those thenight that we- we first- y'know. Fact, she, uh- she never took'em off, 'cause we-we-  Sorry. Sorry. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 What? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Peach pit. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Yes, Bunny? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  Peach pit. That night we, uh- we had-
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 -Peaches? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Actually, nectarines, but basically... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	  Could've been a peach. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Then, uh, then we got dressed, and I-I... Iwalked her to the-  -the bus stop... I'm fine.
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Hey, that woman's got an ass like Carol's! What? Thought we were trying to find stuff. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 So c'mon, you guys, tell me all the dirt! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kiki	 Well, the biggest news is still you dumpingBarry at the altar! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joanne	 Alright. Let's talk reality for a second. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joanne	 When are you coming home? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 What? Guys, I'm not. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joanne	 C'mon, this is us. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 I'm not! This is what I'm doing now. I'vegot this job- 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kiki	 Waitressing? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay, I'm not just waitressing. I'm.. I,um... I write the specials on the specials board, and, uh... and I, uh... I take the uhdead flowers out of the vase... Oh, and, um, sometimes Artelle lets me put the littlechocolate blobbies on the cookies. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Leslie	 Well. Your mom didn't tell usabout the blobbies.
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Hey, Rach. How was it with your friends? Okay! How would you like some Tiki Death Punch?  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 What's that? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Weeeell, it's rum, and- 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 We thought since Phoebe was staying overtonight we'd have kinda like a slumber party thing. We got some trashy magazines, we gotcookie dough, we got Twister...  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Ooh! Ooh! And I brought Operation!But, um, I lost the tweezers, so we can't operate. But we can prep the guy! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Uh, Rach, it's the Visa cardpeople. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Oh, God, ask them what they want. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	  Could you please tell me whatthis is in reference to?  Yes, hold on.  Um, they say there's beensome unusual activity on your account. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 But I haven't used my card in weeks! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 That is the unusualactivity. Look, they just wanna see if you're okay. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 They wanna know if I'm okay. Okay.. theywanna know if I'm okay, okay, let's see. Well, let's see, the FICA guys took all my money,everyone I know is either getting married, or getting promoted, or getting pregnant, andI'm getting coffee! And it's not even for me! So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay, thenyou can tell them I'm okay, okay? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	  Uh- Rachel hasleft the building, can you call back? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Alright, c'mon!  Let's play Twister!
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  Sorry, sorry... Uh-oh.
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 What? There was ice there that night withCarol? Plastic seats? Four thousand angry Pittsburgh fans? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 No, actually I was just saying it looks likewe're not sitting together. But now you mention it, there was ice there thatnight... It was the first frost... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 C'mon, sit. Just sit down, sit. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 You should feel great about yourself! You'redoing this amazing independence thing! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Monica, what is so amazing? I gave up, like,everything. And for what? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 You are just like Jack. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 ...Jack from downstairs? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 No, Jack and the Beanstalk. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Ah, the other Jack. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Yeah, right! See, he gave up something, butthen he got those magic beans. And then he woke up, and there was this, this big plantoutside his window, full of possibilities and stuff.. And he lived in a village, and youlive in the Village.. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay, but Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up acow, I gave up an orthodontist. Okay, I-I-I know, I know I didn't love him- 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh, see, Jack did love the cow. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 But see, it was a plan. Y'know, it wasclear. It was figured out, and now everything's just kinda like... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Floopy? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Yeah. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 So what, you're not the only one. I mean,half the time we don't know where we're going. You've just gotta figure at some point it'sall gonna come together, and it's just gonna be... un-floopy. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh, like that's a word. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay, but Monica, what if- what if itdoesn't come together? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 ...Pheebs? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh, well... 'cause.... you just... I don'tlike this question. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay, see, see, you guys, what if we don'tget magic beans? I mean, what if all we've got are.. beans? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Get him! GET HIM! Get him! Get- YESSS! Notlaughing now, are ya pal! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	  See buddy, that's all you need,a bunch of toothless guys hitting each other with sticks. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Pass it! Pass it! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 He's open! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	All	 Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Hey, look, we're on that TV thing! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 'Scuse me. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	  It says to call this number if you're not completely satisfied with this candy bar.Well, I'm not completely satisfied. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Listen, it's kind of an emergency. Well, Iguess you know that, or we'd be in the predicament room. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	  Hold on.  Fillthese out, sit over there.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  Look, I don't wanna makeany trouble, okay, but I'm in a lot of pain here, alright? My face is dented. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	 Well, you'll have to wait your turn. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Well, how long do you think it'll be? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	  Any minute now. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Hey, this-  Heyy... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 I'm so sorry, you guys. I didn't mean tobring you down. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 No, you were right. I don't have a plan. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	  Pizzaguy! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Thank God. Food.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Phoebe? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 What? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Do you have a plan? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 I don't even have a 'pl'. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 Hi, one, uh, mushroom, greenpepper and onion? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	  No, no, that's not what weordered... We ordered a fat-free crust with extra cheese. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 Wait, you're not'G.Stephanopoulos?' Man, my dad's gonna kill me! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	  Wait!Did you say 'G.Stephanopoulos?' 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 Yeah. This one goes across thestreet, I must have given him yours. Oh, bonehead, bonehead! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Wait, was this a-a small mediterranean guywith curiously intelligent good looks? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 Yeah, that sounds about right. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Was he wearing a stunning blue suit? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 And-and a power tie? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 No, pretty much just a towel. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	  Oh God. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Pizza Guy	 So you guys want me to takethis back? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Are you nuts?! We've got GeorgeStephanopoulos' pizza!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Uh, Pheebs? Who's George Snuffalopagus? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Big Bird's friend. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 I see pizza! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh, I wanna see! Lemme see! Lemme see!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Hello? Who are we spying on? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 White House adviser? Clinton's campaign guy?The one with the great hair, sexy smile, really cute butt? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Oh, him, the little guy? Oh, I love him! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Ooh, wait.. wait, I see a woman. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Please tell me it's his mother. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Definitely not his mother. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Oh, no... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh, wait, she's walking across the floor..she's walking.. she's walking.. she's going for the pizza-  Hey, that's not foryou, bitch!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Excuse me, look, we've been here for overan hour, and a lot of people less sick than my friend have gone in. I mean, that guy withthe toe thing? Who's he sleeping with?  Oh, c'mon Dora, don't be mad... I know we both said somethings we didn't mean, but that doesn't mean we still don't love each other.  Y'know, I feel like I've lost her..  Ba-! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Light still out? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Yeah. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Oh. Maybe they're- napping. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Oh please, they're having sex. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica, Phoebe	 Shut up! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 So, whaddya think George is like? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 I think he's shy. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Yeah? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Yeah. I think you have to draw him out. Andthen- when you do- he's a preppy animal. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 I remember the moonlight coming through thewindow- and her face had the most incredible glow. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Yes, the moon, the glow, the magicalfeeling, you did this part- Could I get some painkillers over here, please? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 He's right, enough, already. What is the bigdeal about today? So you slept with her for the first time, so what? You slept with herfor seven years after that. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Look, it's just a little more complicated... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Well, what? What? What is it? That sheleft you? That she likes women? That she left you for another woman that likes women? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Little louder, okay, I think there's a man onthe twelfth floor in a coma that didn't quite hear you... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Then what? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 My first time with Carol was...  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 What? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 It was my first time. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 With Carol?  Oh. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 So in your whole life, you've only beenwith oneoh. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Whoah, boy, hockey was a big mistake! Therewas a whole bunch of stuff we could've done tonight! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Okay. Okay, I got one. Do you remember thatvegetarian pate that I made that you loved so much? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Well, unless goose is a vegetable...hahaaaah! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh! Oh! Okay, fine, fine. Now I don'tfeel so bad about sleeping with Jason Hurley. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 What?! You slept with Jason? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 You'd already broken up. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 How long? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 A couple hours. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Oh, that's nice! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Okay, okay, okay, I got one!  Anyway- The valentineTommy Rollerson left in your locker was really from me. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Excuse me?! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Hello? Like he was really gonna send youone?  She was a big girl. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Really. Well, at least 'big girls' don't peein their pants in seventh grade! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 I was laughing! You made me laugh!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 There he is! There he is! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Where? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Phoebe	 Right- where we've been looking all night! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 He is so cute! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Oh, George, baby, drop the towel! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	All	 Yeah, drop it! Drop the towel! Please dropthewowww. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Man. Can you believe he's only had sex withone woman? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 I think it's great. Y'know, it's sweet,it's romantic... 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Really? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 No, you kidding? The guy's a freak..  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Both	 Hey, buddy. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Hi.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	  Oh, that's attractive. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Oh, I thought you were great in Silence ofthe Lambs. Oh come on, admit it! All things considered, you had fun tonight. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Fun? Where was the fun? Tell me specifically,which part was the fun part? Where's my puck? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Joey	 Oh, ah- the kid has it. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 The kid...?  Excuse me, uh,that's, that's my puck. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kid	 I found it. Finders keepers, losersweepers.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 You gotta do it, man. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  Oh yeah? Well, I'm rubber, you'reglue, whatevercan't do it.  Listen, uh- gimme back mypuck. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kid	 No. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 'Yes', how about. C'mere. Gimme! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Kid	 No! No!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Receptionist	 Hey! Hey! No rough holding in my ER! 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  GIVE ME MYPUCK!!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 ...Now that was fun. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	  Okay, Monica: Right footred. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Monica	 Could've played Monopoly, butnooooo. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Thanks.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Okay, Pheebs: Right hand blue. Good.  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Hello? Oh, uh, Rachel, it's the Visa cardpeople. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Oh, okay. Will you take my place? 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 Alright.  Yes, this is Rachel. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	 Nooo!   Hello?  Oh, yeah, no, I know, I-I haven'tbeen using it much.  Oh, well, thanks, but, I'm okay, really. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Ross	 Green. To the green. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	  I've got magic beans. Never-never mind. 
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Chandler	 To the left, to the left- aww!  
01	04	0104	The One With George Stephanopoulos	Rachel	  Ohhh... I'm fine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Would you let it go? It's not that big a deal.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Not that big a deal? It's amazing. Ok, you just reach in there, there'sone little maneuver, and bam, a bra right out the sleeve. All right, as far as I'mconcerned, there is nothing a guy can do that even comes close. Am I right?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Come on! You guys can pee standing up.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 We can? All right, I'm tryin' that.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Ok, you know what blows my mind? Women can see breasts any time they want.You just look down and there they are. How you get any work done is beyond me.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Oh, ok, you know what I don't get? The way guys can do so many meanthings, and then not even care.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Multiple orgasms!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 So, Saturday night, the big night, date night, Saturday night,Sat-ur-day night!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 No plans, huh?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Not a one.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Not even, say, breaking up with Janice?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, right, right, shut up.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Chandler, nobody likes breaking up with someone. You just gotta do it.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 No, I know, but it's just so hard, you know? I mean, you're sittingthere with her, she has no idea what's happening, and then you finally get up the courageto do it, and there's the horrible awkward moment when you've handed her the note.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Why do you have to break up with her? Be a man, just stop calling. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 You know, if you want, I'll do it with you.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, thanks, but I think she'd feel like we're gangin' up on her. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 No, I mean you break up with Janice and I'll break up with Tony. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Tony?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Oh, you're breaking up with Tony?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, he's sweet, but it's just not fun anymore, you know? Idon't know if it's me, or his hunger strike, or, I don't know.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	  Does anybody want anything else?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Oh, yeah, last week you had a wonderful, nutty, chocolatey kind of a cakeypie thing.  Nothing, just, just, I'm fine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	  What's the matter? Why so scrunchy?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 It's my father. He wants to give me a Mercedes convertible.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 That guy, he burns me up.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Yeah, well, it's a Mercedes if I move back home. Oh, it was horrible. Hecalled me young lady.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Ooh, I hate when my father calls me that.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Did he give you that whole "You're-not-up-to-this" thingagain?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, yeah. Actually, I got the extended disco version, with threechoruses of "You'll never make it on your own".
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	  Uh-huh, uh-huh.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Hi, Joey.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 My god, Angela.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Wow, being dumped by you obviously agrees with her.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Are you gonna go over there?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 No, yeah, no, ok, but not yet. I don't wanna seem too eager. OneMississippi, two Mississippi, three Mississippi. That seems pretty cool.  Hey, Angela. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	  Joey.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 You look good.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 That's because I'm wearing a dress that accents my boobs.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 You don't say.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 So, uh, Rachel, what are you, uh, what're you doing tonight?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, big glamour night. Me and Monica at Laundorama.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Oh, you uh, you wanna hear a freaky coincidence? Guess who's doing laundrythere too?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Who?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Me. Was that not clear? Hey, why don't, um, why don't I just join youboth, here?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Don't you have a laundry room in your building?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Yes, I do have a laundry room in my building, um, but there's a.... ratproblem. Apparently they're attracted to the dryer sheets, and they're goin' in fine, butthey're comin' out all.... fluffy. Anyway, say, sevenish?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Sure.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Forget it Joey. I'm with Bob now.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Bob? Who the hell's Bob?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Bob is great. He's smart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job.You, you go on three auditions a month and you call yourself an actor, but Bob...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Come on, we were great together. And not just at the fun stuff, but like,talking too.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Yeah, well, sorry, Joe. You said let's just be friends, so guess what?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 We're just friends.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Fine, fine, so, why don't the four of us go out and have dinner togethertonight? You know, as friends?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 What four of us?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 You know, you and Bob, and me and my girlfriend, uh, uh, Monica.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Monica, I'm tellin' you, this guy is perfect for you.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Forget it. Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Come on. This guy's great. His name's Bob. He's Angela's... brother. He'ssmart, he's sophisticated, and he has a real job. Me, I go on three auditions a month andcall myself an actor, but Bob is...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	  Oh, god help us.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Ugly Naked Guy's laying kitchen tile. Eww!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Eww! Look, I'm asking a favor here. If I do this for her brother, maybeAngela will come back to me.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 What's going on here? You go out with tons of girls.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	  I know, but, I made a huge mistake. I never should have broken upwith her. Will you help me? Please?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	  Ok, bye.  Well, Monica's not coming, it's just gonnabe me and Rachel.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh. Well, hold on camper, are you sure you've thought this thingthrough?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 It's laundry. The thinking through is minimal.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 It's just you and Rachel, just the two of you? This is a date. You'regoing on a date.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Nuh-uh.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Yuh-huh.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 So what're you saying here? I should shave again, pick up some wine, what?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Well, you may wanna rethink the dirty underwear. This is basically thefirst time she's gonna see your underwearyou want it to be dirty?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	  No.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, and uh, the fabric softener?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Ok, ok, now what is wrong with my Snuggles? What, it says I'm asensitive, warm kinda guy, you know, like a warm, fuzzy bear. Ok, I can pick somethingelse up on the way.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 There you go.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Thank you. So what does this Bob guy look like? Is he tall? Short?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Yep.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Which?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Which what?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 You've never met Bob, have you?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 No, but he's...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Oh my god, Joey, for all we know this guy could be horribly...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Hey, Joey.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 ...horribly attractive. I'll be shutting up now.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Where are they? Where are they?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 This is nice. We never do anything just the two of us.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 It's great. Maybe tomorrow we can rent a car and run over somepuppies.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Eww, I don't wanna do that.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Here we go.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Ok, have a good break-up.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Hey, Janice.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 Oh, my god, I am so glad you called me. I had the most supremely awfulday.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Hey, that's not good. Can I get an espresso and a latte over here,please?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 We got the proofs back from that photo shoot, you know, the one with thelittle vegetables. Anyway, they pretty much sucked, so, I blew off the rest of the day,and I went shopping...... and I got you, I'm looking, I'm looking,I'm looking, I got you...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	  What... did you get me there? 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 I got you...these. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Bullwinkle socks. That's so sweet.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 Well, I knew you had the Rockys, and so I figured, you know, you canwear Bullwinkle and Bullwinkle, or you can wear Rocky and Rocky,or, you can mix and match,moose and squirrel. Whatever you want.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 That's great. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Well, I'm gonna get another espresso. Can I get you another latte?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	  No, no, I'm still working on mine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 That's it?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Yeah, it was really hard.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, that hug looked pretty brutal.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Ok, you weren't there.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Comin' through. Move, move.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, 'scuse me. I was kinda using that machine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Yeah, well, now you're kinda not.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 But I saved it. I put my basket on top.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Oh, I'm sorry, is that your basket? It's really pretty. Unfortunately, Idon't see suds.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 No suds, no save. Ok?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 What's goin' on?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Hi, uh, nothing. That horrible woman just took my machine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Was your basket on top?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Yeah, but, there were no suds.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 So?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Well, you know, no suds, no save.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 No suds? Excuse me, hold on a second.  That's my friend'smachine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Hey, hey, hey, her stuff wasn't in it.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Hey, hey, hey, that's not the rule and you know it. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	  All right, show's over. Nothing to seehere.  Ok, let's do laundry.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 That was amazing. I can't even send back soup.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Well, that's because you're such a sweet, gentle, uh...Do you, uh, doyou...Oh, hey, uh you must need detergent.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 What's that?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Uberveiss. It's new, it's German, it's extra-tough.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Rach, do you uh, are you gonna separate those?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh god. Oh, am I being like a total laundry spaz? I mean, am I supposedto use like one machine for shirts and another machine for pants? 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Rach, have you never done this before?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Well, not myself, but I know other people that have. Ok, you caught me.I'm a laundry virgin.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Uh, well, don't worry, I'll use the gentle cycle. Ok, um, basically youwanna use one machine for all your whites, a whole nother machine for colors, and a thirdfor your uh, your uh, delicates, and that would be your bras and your under-panty things.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	  Ok, Well, what about theseare white cotton panties. Would they go with whites or delicates?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	  Uh, that, that, that would be a judgment call.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	  He is so cute.  So, where did you guys growup?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Brooklyn Heights.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Bob	 Cleveland.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 How, how did that happen?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Oh my god.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 I suddenly had the feeling that I was falling. But I'm not.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 So, you and Angela, huh?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Bob	 Yep. Pretty much.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 You're a lucky man. You know what I miss the most about her? That cutenibbly noise when she eats. Like a happy little squirrel, or a weasel.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Bob	 Huh, I never really noticed.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Oh, yeah, yeah, listen for it.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Bob	 Monica, Monica is great.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Yeah, but it's not gonna last. She's too much for me in bed. Sexually.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 I've gotta tell you, Bob is terrific.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Yeah, isn't he?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 It is so great to meet a guy who is smart and funny, and has anemotional age beyond, like eight.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 You know what else? He's unbelievable in bed.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Wow. My brother never even told me when he lost his virginity.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Angela	 Huh. That's nice.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Ok, you can do this. It's just like pulling off a Band-aid. Just do itreally fast, and then the wound is exposed.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Janice. Hi, Janice. Ok, here we go. I don't think we should go outanymore. Janice.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 All right. Well, there you go.  Stop it, stop it, stop it.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Ok, I know this is gonna sound really stupid, but I feel that if I cando this, you know, if I can actually do my own laundry, there isn't anything I can't do.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 That does not sound stupid to me. You know, it's like the first time I hadto make dinner for myself, after Carol left me?  I'msorry, that's all the time we have. Next on Ross... Uh-oh.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 What uh-oh?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	  Uh-oh, uh-oh, the laundry's done. It's, uh, it'sa song. The laundry song that we sing.  Uh-oh the laundry's done, uh-oh, uh-oh.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Ross, what's the matter?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Nothing, nothing. Lee-lo, the laundry's done.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Come on, show me.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 All right, all right, it's just that you left a red sock in with all yourwhites, and now, everything's kinda pink.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, everything's pink.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Yeah, uh, except for the red sock, which is still red. I'm sorry, pleasedon't be upset, it could happen to anyone.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Except it didn't. It happened to me. Oh, god, I'm gonna look like a bigmarshmallow peep. What am I doing? What am I doing? My father's right. I can't live on myown! I can't even do laundry!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Something went wrong with Underdog, and they couldn't get his head toinflate. So anyway, um, his head is like flopping down Broadway, right, and I'm justthinking... how inappropriate this is. Um, I've got something in my eye, uh, Joey, couldwe check it in the light, please? 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Oh my god.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 What?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Hello! Were we at the same table? It's like... cocktails in Appalachia.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Come on, they're close.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Close? She's got her tongue in his ear.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Oh, like you've never gotten a little rambunctious with Ross.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Joey, this is sick, it's disgusting, it's, it'snot really true, isit?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Well, who's to say what's true? I mean...
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Oh my god, what were you thinking?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 All right, look, I'm not proud of this, ok? Well, maybe I am a little.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	  Oh! 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Ow!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	  I'm outta here.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Wait, wait, wait. You want him, I want her. He likes you.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Really?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Yeah. I'm thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us,we can break them up.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 I'm so sorry, I can't believe I did this, but I couldn't stop laughingat your Norman Mailer story.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Uh, waiter, one more plate of chicken wings over here.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Here's the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it's like we're different.I'm like the bing, bing, bing. You're like the boom, boom, ... boom.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 Ow!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, my god, I'm so sorry. Are you ok?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Janice	 Ow. Um, it's just my lens. It's just my lens. I'll be right back.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	  I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! This is theworst break-up in the history of the world. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Oh my god.  How many of those have youhad?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 Oh, I don't know, a million?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Chandler, easy, easy. Go to your happy place. La la la la la la la.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 I'm fine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 All right. 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 I'm not fine. Here she comes.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Wait here. Breathe.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 How do you do that?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 It's like a gift.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 We should always always break up together.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Oh, I'd like that.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 You got the clothes clean. Now that's the important part.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Whoa, I'm sorry. Excuse me. We had this cart.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Yeah, well, I had a 24-inch waist. You lose things. Now come on, getoutta my way.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 I'm sorry, you know, maybe I wasn't being clear. Uh, this is our cart.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Hey, hey, hey there aren't any clothes in it.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Hey, hey, hey, hey, quit making up rules!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Woman	 Let go!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have totake me with it! 
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	  Yes! Did you see that?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 You were incredible! Brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 I could not have done this without you.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Ok, um, uh, more clothes in the dryer?  I'm fine, I'm fine.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Are you sure?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 No.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Oh, are you sure you're ok?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Yeah.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Does it still hurt?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 Yeah.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	  What a neat idea. All your clothes match. I'mgonna do this.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 Hi.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Hey, how'd it go?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Joey	 Excellent.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	 We ripped that couple apart, and kept the pieces for ourselves.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Ross	 What a beautiful story. Hey, I'm fine by the way.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Monica	  Oh, I'm sorry.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Rachel	 Where's Chandler?
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 Oh, he needed some time to grieve.
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Chandler	 I'm free! I'm free!
01	05	0105	The One With The East German Laundry Detergent	Phoebe	 That oughta do it.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	  Ooh! Look! Look! Look! Look, there's Joey'spicture! This is so exciting!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 You can always spot someone who's never seen one of his plays before.Notice, no fear, no sense of impending doom...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 The exclamation point in the title scares me.  Y'know, it'snot just Freud, it's Freud!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Oh, shhh, shh. Magic is about to happen.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Vell, Eva, ve've done some excellent vork here, and I vould have to say,your pwoblem is qviiite clear.  
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 God. I feel violated.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Did anybody else feel they just wanted to peel the skin off their body,to have something else to do?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	  Ross, ten o'clock.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Is it? Feels like two.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 No, ten o'clock.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 What?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	  There's a beautiful woman at eight,nine, ten o'clock!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Oh. Hel-lo!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 She's amazing! She makes the women that I dream about look like short,fat, bald men!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Well, go over to her! She's not with anyone.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh yeah, and what would my opening line be? 'Excuse me.Blarrglarrghh.'
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Oh, c'mon. She's a person, you can do it!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh please, could she be more out of my league? Ross,back me up here.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 He could never get a woman like that in a million years.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Thank you, buddy.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Oh, oh, but y'know, you always see these really beautiful women withthese really nothing guys, you could be one of those guys.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 You could do that!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Y'think?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Yeah!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh God, I can't believe I'm even considering this... I'm very veryaware of my tongue...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 C'mon! C'mon!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Here goes. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 ...Yes?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Hi.... um... okay, next word... would be... Chandler! Chandler is myname, and, uh......hi.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Yes, you said that.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Yes, yes I did, but what I didn't say was what I was about to say,what I wanted to say was, uh... would you like to go out with me sometime, thankyou,goodnight.  
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Chandler?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Hey! You're in a play! I didn't know you could dance! You had a beard!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Whadja think?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 ...Hey! You're in a play! I didn't know you could dance! You had a beard!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 C'mon, you guys, it wasn't that bad. It was better than that thing I didwith the trolls, at least you got to see my head.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	  Saw your head. Saw your head.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	  She said yes!! She said yes!!  Awful play,man. Whoah.  Her name's Aurora, and she's Italian, and she pronounces my name'Chand-lrr'. 'Chand-lrr'. I think I like it better that way.  Oh, listen, theusher gave me this to give to you. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 What is it?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 The Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. Wow, an agency left me its card! Maybethey wanna sign me!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Based on this play? ...Based on this play!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Hey, kids. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Hey.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	  No, 'cause this line is passion, and this is...just a line.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Well, I can't believe I've been here almost seven seconds and youhaven't asked me how my date went.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Oh, right, right. How was your date, 'Chand-lrr'?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 It was unbelievable. I-I've never met anyone like her. She's had themost amazing life! She was in the Israeli army...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 ...Luckily none of the bullets hit the engine block. So, we made itto the border, but just barely, and I- ...I've been talking about myself all night long,I'm sorry. What about you? Tell me one of your stories.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Alright. Once I got on the subway, right, and it was at night, and Irode it all the way to Brooklyn... just for the hell of it.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 We talked 'til like two. It was this perfect evening... more orless.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 ...All of a sudden we realised we were in Yammon. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh, I'm sorry, so 'we' is?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 'We' would be me and Rick.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Who's Rick?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Who's Rick?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 My husband.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Ooooohhh.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh, so you're divorced?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 No.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh, I'm sorry, then you're widowed?...Hopefully?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 No, I'm still married.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 So tell me, how do- how do you think your husband would feel about yousitting here with me?...Sliding your foot so far up my pant leg you can count the changein my pocket?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Don't worry. I imagine he'd be okay with you because really, he's okaywith Ethan.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Ethan? There's, there's an Ethan?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Mmmm... Ethan is my... boyfriend.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 What?!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 So explain something to me here, uh, what kind of a relationship doyou imagine us having if you already have a husband and a boyfriend?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 I suppose mainly sexual.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 ...Hm.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Oh. I'm sorry it didn't work out.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 What 'not work out'? I'm seeing her again on Thursday. Didn't youlisten to the story?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Didn't you listen to the story? I mean, this is twisted! How could youget involved with a woman like this?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Well, y'know, I had some trouble with it at first too, but the way Ilook at it is, I get all the good stuff: all the fun, all the talking, all the sex; and noneof the responsibility. I mean, this is every guy's fantasy!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah. That is not true. Ross, is this your fantasy?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 No, of course not!  ...Yeah, yeah, it is.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 What? So you guys don't mind going out with someone else who's going outwith someone else?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 I couldn't do it.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Good for you, Joey.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 When I'm with a woman, I need to know that I'm going out withmore people than she is.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Well, y'know, monogamy can be a, uh, tricky concept. I mean,anthropologically speaking-
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Fine. Fine, alright, now you'll never know.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 We're kidding. C'mon, tell us!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Yeah! C'mon!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Alright. There's a theory, put forth by Richard Leakey-
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Tah-daaah!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Are we greeting each other this way now? 'Cause I like that.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Look! I cleaned! I did the windows, I did the floors... I even used allthe attachments on the vacuum, except that little round one with the bristles, I don'tknow what that's for.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Oh yeah, nobody knows. And we're not supposed to ask.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Well, whaddya think?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Very clean! It looks great! Terrific!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 ...Oh! I-I see you moved the green ottoman.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Uh-oh...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 How-how did that happen?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 I dunno.. I-I thought it looked better there. And I- and also, it's anextra seat around the coffee table.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Yeah, yeah, it's interesting.. but y'know what? Just for fun, let's seewhat it looked like in the old spot.  Alright, just to compare. Let's see.Well, it looks good there too. Let's just leave it there for a while.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	  I can't believe you tried to move the green ottoman.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Thank God you didn't try to fan out the magazines. I mean, she'llscratch your eyes right out.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 You guys, I am not that bad!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Yeah, you are, Monica. Remember when I lived with you? You were like, alittle, y'know,  Ree! Ree! Ree! Ree!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 That is so unfair!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Oh c'mon! When we were kids, yours was the only Raggedy Ann doll thatwasn't raggedy!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Okay, so I'm responsible, I'm organised. But hey, I can be a kook.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Alright, you madcap gal. Try to imagine this. The phone bill arrives, butyou don't pay it right away.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Why not?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Because you're a kook! Instead you wait until they send you a notice.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 I could do that.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Okay, uh, you let me go grocery shopping, and I buy laundry detergent,but it's not the one with the easy-pour spout.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Why would someone do that?! ...One might wonder.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Someone's left a glass on the coffee table. There's no coaster. It's acold drink, it's a hot day. Little beads of condensation are inching their way closer andcloser to the surface of the wood...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 STOP IT!! ...Oh my God. It's true! Who am I?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Monica? You're Mom.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Ree! Ree! Ree! Ree! Ree!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	  Uh huh.. uh huh... oh my God! Okay! Okay, I'll be there!  That was my agent.  My agent hasjust gotten me a job...in the new Al Pacino movie!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Oh my God! Whoah!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Well, what's the part?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Can you believe this? Al Pacino! This guy's the reason I became an actor!"I'm out of order? Pfeeeh. You're out of order! This whole courtroom's out oforder!"
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 Seriously, what-what's the part?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 "Just when I thought I was out, they pull me back in!"
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 C'mon, seriously, Joey, what's the part?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 ...I'm his 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 ..You're, you're 'mah mah mah' what?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 ...I'm his butt double. 'Kay? I play Al Pacino's butt. Alright? He goesinto the shower, and then- I'm his butt.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	  Oh my God.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, and that'sbig!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh no, it's terrific, it's... it's... y'know, you deserve this, afterall your years of struggling, you've finally been able to crack your way intoshowbusiness.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 You're right, you're right, it is...So you gonna invite us all to the bigopening?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Alright, alright, alright... 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Here. I need to borrow some moisturizer.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 For what?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Whaddya think? Today's the big day!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Oh my God. Okay, go into the bathroom, use whatever you want, just don'tever tell me what you did in there.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Thank you! 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Where's Joey? His mom's on the phone.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 He's in the bathroom. I don't think you wanna go in there!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 C'mon, we're roommates!  My eyes!! My eyes!!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 I warned you...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Who is being loud?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh, that would be Monica. Hey, listen, I wanna borrow a coupla things,Aurora spent the night, I really wanna make her breakfast.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Oh, you got the whole night, huh?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I only have twenty minutes until Ethan, so, y'know.. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Ooh, do I sense a little bit of resentment?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 No, no resentment, believe me, it's worth it. 'Kay? Y'know in arelationship you have these key moments that you know you'll remember for the rest of yourlife? Well, every- single- second is like that with Aurora.. and I've just wasted aboutthirty-five of them talking to you people, so, uh.. Monica, can you help me with the door?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Sure. Oh, um, Chandler? Y'know, the-the old Monica would-would remindyou to scrub that Teflon pan with a plastic brush...But I'm not gonna do that. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 ...Dammit, hire the girl! Okay, everybody ready?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Uh, listen, I just wanna thank you for this great opportunity.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 Lose the robe.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Me?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 That would work.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Right. Okay. Losing the robe.  And the robe islost.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 Okay, everybody, we'd like to get this in one take, please. Let's rollit.. water's working .. and... action.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 And cut. Hey, Butt Guy, what the hell are you doing?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Well, I'm- I'm showering.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 No, that was clenching.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Oh. Well, the way I see it, the guy's upset here, y'know? I mean, hiswife's dead, his brother's missing... I think his butt would be angry here.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Director	 I think his butt would like to get this shot before lunch. Once again,rolling... water working... and action....and cut. What was that?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 I was going for quiet desperation. But if you have to ask...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 God, I love these fingers...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Thank you.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 No, actually I meant my fingers. Look at 'em, look at how happy theyare.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	  Oh my God, I'm late. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh no nonononononnononono, don't go.. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Okay.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Don't go.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Okay. Oh no, I have to.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	  Too bad, she's leaving.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	  I'm sorry. He'll be waiting for me.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Well, I thought- I thought you talked to Rick.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 It's not Rick.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 What, Ethan? He got to spend the whole day with you!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 No, it's-it's Andrew. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 I know there'll be many moments in the years to come when I'll regretasking the following question, but- And Andrew is?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 He's... new.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Oh, so what you're saying is you're not completely fulfilled by Rick,Ethan and myself?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 No, that's not exactly what I was..
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Well, y'know, most women would kill for three guys like us.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 So what do you want?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 You.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 You have me!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Nono, just you.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Whaddyou mean?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Lose the other guys.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 ...Like, ...all of them?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 C'mon, we're great together, why not?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Why can't we just have what we have now? Why can't we just talk, andlaugh, and make love, without feeling obligated to one another... and up until tonight Ithought that's what you wanted too.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 ...Well, y'know, part of me wants that, but it's like I'm two guys,y'know? I mean, one guy's going 'Shut up! This is great!' But there's this other guy.Actually it's the same guy that wells up every time that Grinch's heart grows three sizesand breaks that measuring device... And he's saying, y'know, 'This is too hard! Get out!Get out!'
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 So... which one of the two guys will you listen to?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 I don't know, I-I have to listen to both of them, they don't exactlylet each other finish...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	 Which one?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 ...The second guy.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Aurora	  Well, call me if you change your mind.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Sorry, the first guy runs the lips.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Look at it this way: you dumped her.Right? I mean, this woman was unbelievably sexy, and beautiful, intelligent,unattainable... Tell me why you did this again?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Hey!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Hey, waitwait, aren't you the guy that plays the butt in the new AlPacino movie?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Nope.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 No? What happened, big guy?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	  "Big guy?"
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 It felt like a 'big guy' moment.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 I got fired.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Oh!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Yeah, they said I acted too much with it. I told everybody about this! Noweverybody's gonna go to the theatre, expecting to see me, and...
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Oh, Joey, you know what, no-one is gonna be able to tell.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 My mom will.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Chandler	 Something so sweet and...disturbing about that.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Y'know, I've done nothing but crappy plays for six years. And I finallyget my shot, and I blow it!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Maybe this wasn't your shot.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 Yeah, I mean... I think when it's your shot, y'know, you-you know it'syour shot. Did it... feel like your shot..?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Hard to tell, I was naked.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Phoebe	 No, I don't think this was your shot. I mean, I don't even think youjust get one shot. I really believe big things are gonna happen for you, I do! You'vegotta just keep thinking about the day that some kid is gonna run up to his friends and go'I got the part! I got the part! I'm gonna be Joey Tribbiani's ass!'.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Joey	 Yeah? That's so nice! 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 I'm sorry, Joey. I'm gonna go to bed, guys. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	All	 Night.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Uh, Mon, you-you gonna leave your shoes out here?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	  Uh-huh!
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Rachel	 Really? Just casually strewn about in that reckless haphazard manner?
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	 Doesn't matter, I'll get 'em tomorrow. Or not. Whenever. 
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Ross	 She is a kook.
01	06	0106	The One With The Butt	Monica	  If it bothers youthat much, just go out and get the shoes. No. Don't do this. This is stupid! I don't haveto prove anything, I'm gonna go get them...But then everyone will know. Unless I get them,and then wake up really early and put them back! ...I need help!  
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Everybody? Shh, shhh. Uhhh... Central Perk is proud to present the musicof Miss Phoebe Buffay.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Hi. Um, I want to start with a song thats about that moment when yousuddenly realize what life is all about. OK, here we go.  OK, thank you very much.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Oh, great. This is just...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Wow, this is so cool, you guys. The entire city is blacked out!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Mom says it's all of Manhattan, parts of Brooklyn and Queens, and theyhave no idea when it's coming back on.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Wow, you guys, this is big.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	  Pants and a sweater? Why, mom? Who am I gonna meet in ablackout? Power company guys? Eligible looters? Could we talk about this later? OK. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Can I borrow the phone? I want to call my apartment and check on mygrandma.  What's my number? 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Well, I never call me.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Oh my God, it's that Victoria's Secret model. Something...something Goodacre.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	  Hi Mom, it's Jill.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 She's right, it's Jill. Jill Goodacre. Oh my God. I am trapped inan ATM vestibule with Jill Goodacre!  Is it a vestibule? Maybe it's anatrium. Oh, yeah, that is the part to focus on, you idiot!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	  Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just stuck at the bank, in an ATMvestibule.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Jill says vestibule... I'm going with vestibule.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	  I'm fine. No, I'm not alone... I don't know, some guy.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Oh! Some guy. Some guy. 'Hey Jill, I saw you with some guy lastnight. Yes, he was some guy. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Hi everyone.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 And officiating at tonight's blackout, is Rabbi Tribbiani.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Well, Chandler's old roomate was Jewish, and these are the only candles wehave, so... Happy Chanukah, everyone.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 That had to hurt!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Alright, alright, alright. It's been fourteen and a half minutesand you still have not said one word. Oh God, do something. Just make contact, smile!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 There you go!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 You're definitely scaring here.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	  Would you like to call somebody? 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Yeah, about 300 guys I went to high school with. Yeah, thanks.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Hello?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Hey, it's me.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	  It's Chandler!  Are you OK?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm fine.  I'm trppd in anATM vstbl wth Jll Gdcr.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 What?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 I'm trppd... in an ATM vstbl... wth Jll Gdcr!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 I have no idea what you just said.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	  Put Joey on the phone.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 What's up man?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 I'm trppd... in an ATM vstbl... wth JLL GDCR.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	  Oh my God! He's trapped in an ATM vestibule with JillGoodacre!  Chandler, listen. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Yeah, like that thought never entered my mind.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Alright, somebody.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 OK, I'll go. OK, senior year of college... on a pool table.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	All	 Whoooaa!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 That's my sister.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 OK... my weirdest place would have to be... the women's room on the secondfloor of the New York CIty public library.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Oh my God! What were you doing in a library?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Pheebs, what about you?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Oh... Milwaukee.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Um... Ross?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Disneyland, 1989, 'It's a Small World After All.'
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	All	 No way!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 The ride broke down. So, Carol and I went behind a couple of thosemechanical Dutch children... then they fixed the ride, and we were asked never to returnto the Magic Kingdom.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Oh, Rachel.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh come on, I already went.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 You did not go!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	All	 Come on.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh, alright. The weirdest place would have to be... ... oh, thefoot of the bed. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Step back.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 We have a winner!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 I just never had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know,where you have to have somebody right there, in the middle of a theme park.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Well, it was the only thing to do there that didn't have a line.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 There, well, see? Barry wouldn't even kiss me on a miniature golfcourse. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Come on.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 No, he said we were holding up the people behind us.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  And you didn't marry him because...?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 I mean, do you think there are people who go through life never havingthat kind of...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Probably. But you know, I'll tell you something. Passion is way overrated.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Yeah right.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 It is. Eventually, it kind of... burns out. But hopefully, what you'releft with is trust, and security, and... well, in the case of my ex-wife, lesbianism. So,you know, for all of those people who miss out on that passion... thing, there's all thatother good stuff.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	  OK.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 But, um... I don't think that's going to be you.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 You don't.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Uh-uh. See, I see.... big passion in your future.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Really?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Mmmm.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 You do?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 I do.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh Ross, you're so great. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 It's never gonna happen.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  What?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 You and Rachel.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  What?  Why not?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Because you waited too long to make your move, and now you're in the friendzone. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 No, no, no. I'm not in the zone.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Ross, you're mayor of the zone.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 I'm taking my time, alright? I'm laying the groundwork. Yeah. I mean,every day I get just a little bit closer to...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Priesthood! Look Ross, I'm telling you, she has no idea what you'rethinking. If you don't ask her out soon you're going to end up stuck in the zone forever.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 I will, I will. See, I'm waiting for the right moment. What? What, now?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Yeeeeaaaahhh! What's messing you up? The wine? The candles? The moonlight?You've just got to go up to her and say, 'Rachel, I think that...' 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Shhhh!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 What are you shushing?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 We're shushing... because... we're trying to hear something. Listen. Don't you hear that?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Ahhhh!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 See?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Huh. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Would you like some gum?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Um, is it sugarless?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	  Sorry, it's not.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Oh, then no thanks. What the hell was that? Mental note: If JillGoodacre offers you gum, you take it. If she offers you mangled animal carcass, you takeit.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  New York City has no power, and the milk is getting sour. Butto me it is not scary, 'cause I stay away from dairy.... la la la, la la, la la... 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  OK, here goes.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Are you going to do it?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 I'm going to do it.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Do you want any help?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 You come out there, you're a dead man.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Good luck, man.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Thanks.  OK.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 OK. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Hey, where are you going?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Outside.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 You can't go out there.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Why not?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Because of... the reason.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 And that would be?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 I, um, can't tell you.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Joey, what's going on?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 OK, you've got to promise that you'll never, ever tell Ross that I toldyou.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 About what?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 He's planning your birthday party.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Oh my God! I love him!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	  You'd better act surprised.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 About what?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 My surprise party!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 What surprise party?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Oh stop it. Joey already told me.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Well, he didn't tell me.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Hey, don't look at me. This is Ross's thing.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 This is so typical. I'm always the last one to know everything.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 No, you are not. We tell you stuff.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Yuh-huh! I was the last one to know when Chandler got bitten by thepeacock at the zoo. I was the last one to know when you had a crush on Joey when he wasmoving in.  Lookslike I was second to last.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Hmmm... this is so nice.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 OK, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as..more of a general wondering... ment.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 OK.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 OK. Here goes. For a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Ohhh!!!! 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Yes, yes, that's right...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh, look at the little cat! 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 What?  Ow!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica, Joey, Phoebe	  I'm on top of the world,looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find, is the wonders I've foundever since...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	  This is just Bactine. It won't hurt.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Sorry, that was wax.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Oh, poor little Tooty is scared to death. We should find his owner.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Why don't we just put 'poor little Tooty' out in the hall?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 During a blackout? He'd get trampled!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  Yeah?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 You know, on second thought, gum would be perfection.  'Gum would be perfection'? 'Gum would beperfection.' Could have said 'gum would be nice,' or 'I'll have a stick,' but no, no, no,no. For me, gum is perfection. I loathe myself.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  Oh no, the Mendels, they hate all living things,right?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh.  Hi. We just foundthis cat and we're looking for the owner.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Mr. Heckles	 Er, yeah, it's mine.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  He seems to hate you. Are yousure?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Mr. Heckles	 Yeah, it's my cat. Give me my cat.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Wait a minute. What's his name?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Mr. Heckles	 Ehhhh... B-Buttons.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Bob Buttons?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Mr. Heckles	 Mmm. Bob Buttons. Here, Bob Buttons.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  Oooh! You are a very bad man!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Mr. Heckles	  You owe me a cat.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Here, kitty-kitty. Here kitty-kitty. Where did you go, littlekitty-kitty-kitty? Here kitty-kitty-kitty-kitty...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Wow. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  Lucky sixes....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	  Everybody, this is Paolo. Paolo, Iwant you to meet my friends. This is Monica.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	  Hi!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 And Joey....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Hi!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 And Ross.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 Hi!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	  He doesn't speak much English.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	  Monopoly! 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Look at that!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  So, um... where did Paolo come from?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh... Italy, I think.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 No, I mean tonight, in the building. Suddenly. Into our lives.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Well, the cat... the cat turned out to be Paolo's cat!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 That, that is funny... .... and Rachel keeps touching him.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Alright. I looked all over the building and I couldn't find the kittyanywhere.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Oh, I found him. He was Paolo's cat.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Ah! Well! There you go! Last to know again! And I'm guessing... sincenobody told me... this is Paolo.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Ah, Paolo, this is Phoebe.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	  You betcha!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	  Ah, let's see. What next? Blow a bubble. A bubble'sgood. It's got a... boyish charm, it's impish. Here we go.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Nice going, imp. OK, it's OK. All I need to do is reach over andput it in my mouth. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Good save! We're back on track, and I'm...  ..chewingsomeone else's gum. This is not my gum. Oh my God! Oh my God! And now you'rechoking. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Are you alright?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 My God, you're choking!  That better?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	  Yes... thank you. That was... that was....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Perfection?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	  Blah blah blah, blah blah blah... blah blaaaaaah....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Wha-What did he say that was so funny?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 I have absolutely no idea.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 That's... that's classic.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	  Oh my God, you guys, what am I doing? What am Idoing? This is so un-me!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Monica	 If you want, I'll do it.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 I know, I just want to bite his bottom lip.  But Iwon't.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 God, the first time he smiled at me... those three seconds were moreexciting than three weeks in Bermuda with Barry.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 You know, did you ride mopeds? 'Cause I've heard... ... oh, I see... it's not about that right now. OK.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Rachel	 Y'know, I know it's totally superficial and we have absolutely nothingin common, and we don't even speak the same language but Goooooooddddddd....
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Paolo. Hi.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Ross!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Listen. Um, listen. Something you should... know... um, Rachel and I...we're kind of a thing.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Thing?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Thing, yes. Thing.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Ah, you... have the sex?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 No, no, no. Technically the... sex is not... being had, but that's... see,that's not the point. See, um, the point is that... Rachel and I should be, er, together.You know, and if you get in the.... um... 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Bed?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 No, no, that's not where I was going. Er, if you get in the... way,of us becoming a thing, then I would be, well, very sad.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Oh!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Yeah! Se vice?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Si.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 So you do know a little English.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 Poco... a leetle.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Do you know the word crapweasel?
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Paolo	 No.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 That's funny, because you know, you are a huge crapweasel!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Chandler, we've been here for an hour doing this! Now watch, it's easy.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 OK.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Ready? 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 No, you've got to whip it. 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Oh, look look look. The last candle's about to burn out. 10, 9, 8, 7...... negative 46, negative 47, negative 48.... 
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Thank you.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Phoebe	 Thanks.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Kinda... spooky without any lights.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	  Bwah-hah-hah!
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 OK, guys, guys? I have the definitive one. Mwwwooooo-hah-hah...
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Ross	 Oh.. oh... oh.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Joey	 Hey Ross. This probably isn't the best time to bring it up, but you haveto throw a party for Monica.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Well, this has been fun.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Yes. Yes, thanks for letting me use your phone... and for saving mylife.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Jill	 Well, goodbye Chandler. I had a great blackout.  See ya.
01	07	0107	The One With The Blackout	Chandler	 Hi, um, I'm account number 7143457. And, uh, I don't know if you gotany of that, but I would really like a copy of the tape.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Hey gorgeous, how's it going?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Dehydrated Japanese noodles under fluorescent lights... does it getbetter than this?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Question. You're not dating anybody, are you, because I met somebodywho would be perfect for you.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Ah, y'see, perfect might be a problem. Had you said 'co-dependent', or'self-destructive'...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Do you want a date Saturday?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Yes please.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Okay. He's cute, he's funny, he's-
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 He's a he?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Well yeah! ...Oh God. I- just- I thought- Good, Shelley. I'm just gonnago flush myself down the toilet now... Okay, goodbye...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 ...Couldn't enjoy a cup of noodles after that. I mean, is thatridiculous? Can you believe she actually thought that?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Um... yeah. Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe,possibly, you might be... 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 You did?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to mybreasts, so then I figured maybe not.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Huh. Did, uh... any of the rest of you guys think that when you firstmet me?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 I did.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Yeah, I think so, yeah.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Not me.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Nono, me neither. Although, uh, y'know, back in college, Susan Sallidordid.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 You're kidding! Did you tell her I wasn't?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 No. No, it's just 'cause, uh, I kinda wanted to go out with her too, so Itold her, actually, you were seeing Bernie Spellman... who also liked her, so...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Well, this is fascinating. So, uh, what is it about me?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 I dunno, 'cause you're smart, you're funny...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Ross is smart and funny, d'you ever think that about him?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	All	 Yeah! Right!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 WHAT IS IT?!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Okay, I-I d'know, you-you just- you have a quality.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	All	 Yes. Absolutely. A quality.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Oh, oh, a quality, good, because I was worried you guys were gonna bevague about this.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Hello? Hello? Oh! Rachel, it's Paolo calling from Rome. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Oh my God! Calling from Rome!  Bon giorno, caro mio.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  So he's calling from Rome. I could do that. Just gotta go toRome.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Monica, your dad just beeped in, but can you make it quick? Talking toRome.  I'm talking to Rome.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Hey dad, what's up?  Oh God. Ross, it's Nana.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 So, uh, how's she doing?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 The doctor says it's a matter of hours.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 How-how are you, Mom?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Me? I'm fine, fine. I'm glad you're here. ...What's with your hair?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 What?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 What's different?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Nothing.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, maybe that's it.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 She is unbelievable, our mother is...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Okay, relax, relax. We are gonna be here for a while, it looks like, andwe still have boyfriends and your career to cover.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Oh God!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 The fuzzy little mints at the bottom of her purse. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh! ...Yeah, they were gross. Oh, you know what I loved? Her Sweet 'n'Los. How she was always stealing them from- from restaurants.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Not just restaurants, from our house.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Nurse	 Mrs. Geller?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 She looks so small. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 I know.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Well, at least she's with Pop-Pop and Aunt Phyllis now. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 G'bye, Nana. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Bye, Nana. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Ross!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 What is going on?!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Y'know how-how the nurse said that-that Nana had passed? Well, she's not,quite..
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 What?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 She's not- past, she's present, she's back.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	  What's going on?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 She may have died.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 She may have died?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 We're looking into it.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I, uh, I'll go see. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Nurse	 This almost never happens!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Now she's passed.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 I just have to know, okay. Is it my hair?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	  Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. It's your hair.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Yeah, you have homosexual hair.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 So, um, did she...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Twice.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Twice?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Oh, that sucks!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 You guys okay?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I dunno, it's weird. I mean, I know she's gone, but I just don't feel,uh...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Maybe that's 'cause she's not really gone.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Nono, she's gone.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 We checked. A lot.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Hm, I mean maybe no-one ever really goes. Ever since my mom died, everynow and then, I get the feeling that she's like right here, y'know?  Oh! AndDebbie, my best friend from junior high- got struck by lightning on a miniature golfcourse- I always get this really strong Debbie vibe whenever I use one of those littleyellow pencils, y'know? ...I miss her.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Aw. Hey, Pheebs, want this? 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Thanks!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Sure. I just sharpened her this morning.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Now, see, I don't believe any of that. I think once you're dead, you'redead! You're gone! You're worm food!  ...So Chandler looks gay,huh?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Y'know, I dunno who this is, but it's not Debbie. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I thought it was gonna be a closed casket.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Well, that doesn't mean she can't look nice!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Sweetie, you think you can get in there?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  I don't see why not.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Here's my retainer!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 I was just thinking. When my time comes-
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Dad!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Listen to me! When my time comes, I wanna be buried at sea.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 You what?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 I wanna be buried at sea, it looks like fun. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Define fun.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 C'mon, you'll make a day of it! You'll rent a boat, pack a lunch...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 ...And then we throw your body in the water... Gee, that does sound fun.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Everyone thinks they know me. Everyone says 'Jack Geller, sopredictable'. Maybe after I'm gone, they'll say 'Buried at sea! Huh!'.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 That's probably what they'll say.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 I'd like that.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Hey, gorgeous.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	  Hey. Look, I'm sorry about yesterday, I, um-
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 No, nono, don't- don't worry about it. Believe me, apparently otherpeople have made the same mistake.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Oh! Okay! Phew! 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 So, uh... what do you think it is about me?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 I dunno, uh... you just have a-a...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 ...Quality, right, great.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Y'know, it's a shame, because you and Lowell would've made a greatcouple.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Lowell? Financial Services' Lowell, that's who you saw me with?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 What? He's cute!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Well, yeah... 's'no Brian in Payroll.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Is Brian...?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 No! Uh, I d'know! The point is, if you were gonna set me up withsomeone, I'd like to think you'd set me up with someone like him.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Shelley	 Well, I think Brian's a little out of your league.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Excuse me? You don't think I could get a Brian? Because I could geta Brian. Believe you me. ...I'm really not.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  This one?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 No.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I have shown you everything we have. Unless you want your mother to spendeternity in a lemon yellow pant-suit, go with the burgundy.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 You know, whatever we pick, she would've told us it's the wrongone.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 You're right. We'll go with the burgundy.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh! A fine choice. I'm coming out. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 Wait! We need shoes!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Okay. Um, how about these? 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 That's really a day shoe.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 And where she's going everyone else'll be dressier?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 Could we see something in a slimmer heel?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  Okay, I have nothing in an evening shoe in the burgundy.I can show you something in a silver that may work.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Aunt Lillian	 No, it really should be burgundy.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Mm. Unless we go with a different dress?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 No! Nonono, wait a sec. I may have something in the back.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh my God..
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Is everything all right, dear?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Yeah, just... just Nana stuff.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  How we doing, you guys ready?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Mom already called this morning to remind me not to wear my hair up. Didyou know my ears are not my best feature?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Some days it's all I can think about. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	  Hi, sorry I'm late, I couldn't find my bearings.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Oh, you-you mean your earrings?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 What'd I say?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	  Hm-m.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Are these the shoes?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Yes. Paolo sent them from Italy.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 What, we-uh- we don't have shoes here, or...?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	  Morning. We ready to go?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Well, don't we look nice all dressed up?...It's stuff like that, isn'tit?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 It was a really beautiful service.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 It really was. Oh, c'mere, sweetheart.  Y'know, I thinkit might be time for you to start using night cream.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 What?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Nothing, just your overcoat sounds remarkably like Brent Mussberger.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Check it out, Giants-Cowboys. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 You're watching a football game at a funeral?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 No, it's the pre-game. I'm gonna watch it at the reception.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 You are a frightening, frightening man.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Oh no! My new Paolo shoes!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh, I hope they're not ruined.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 God, what a great day. ...What? Weather-wise!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I know, uh, the air, the-the trees... even though Nana's gone there's,there's something almost, uh- I dunno, almost life-aff- 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	All	 God! Ross!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I'm fine. Just-just... having my worst fear realised...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Okay, don't worry, I'm just checking to see if the muscle's inspasm...huh.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 What, what is it?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 You missed a belt loop. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh! No-n-
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Okay, it's in spasm.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Here, sweetie, here. I took these when I had my golfing accident.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Oh, no-
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Andrea	 Sorry- Hi, I'm Dorothy's daughter.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Hi, I'm Chandler, and I have no idea who Dorothy is.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Hey, look who's up! How do you feel?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 I feel great. I feel- great, I fleel great.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Wow, those pills really worked, huh?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Not the first two, but the second two- woooo! ...I love you guys. You guysare the greatest. I love my sister , I love Pheebs... 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Phoebe	 Ooh! That's so nice...
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 ...Chandler! 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Hey.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  And listen, man, if you wanna be gay, be gay. Doesn't matter tome.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Andrea	  You were right. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Rachel. Rachel Rachel.  I love you the most.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	  Oh, well you know who I love the most?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 No.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 You!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Oh.. you don't get it! 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Whaddya got there?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	  Just a, uh... hearingdisability.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 What's the score?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Seventeen-fourteen Giants... three minutes to go in the third.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Beautiful! 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	  Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	  Your grandmother would have hated this.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Well, sure, what with it being her funeral and all.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 No, I'd be hearing about 'Why didn't I get the honey-glazed ham?',I didn't spend enough on flowers, and if I spent more she'd be saying 'Why are you wastingyour money? I don't need flowers, I'm dead'.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 That sounds like Nana.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Do you know what it's like to grow up with someone who is criticalof every single thing you say?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 ...I can imagine.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 I'm telling you, it's a wonder your mother turned out to be thepositive, life-affirming person that she is.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 That is a wonder. So tell me something, Mom. If you had to do it allover again, I mean, if she was here right now, would you tell her?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Tell her what?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 How she drove you crazy, picking on every little detail, like yourhair... for example.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 I'm not sure I know what you're getting at.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Do you think things would have been better if you'd just told her thetruth?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 ...No. I think some things are better left unsaid. I think it'snicer when people just get along. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Huh.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 More wine, dear?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Oh, I think so.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Those earrings look really lovely on you.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Thank you. They're yours.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mrs. Geller	 Actually they were Nana's.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Mr. Geller	 Now I'm depressed! ... Even more than I was.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Hey, who's this little naked guy?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 That little naked guy would be me.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Aww, look at the little thing.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Who are those people?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Got me.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle.  'Me and thegang at Java Joe's'. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Rachel	 Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Monica	 Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	 Looks like a fun gang. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Joey	 Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Ross	  Nono, that would be me again. I'm, uh, just trying something.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Hey, Lowell.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 Hey, Chandler.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 So how's it going there in Financial Services?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 It's like Mardi Gras without the paper mache heads. How 'bout you?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Good, good. Listen, heh, I dunno what Shelley told you about me, but,uh... I'm not.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 I know. That's what I told her.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Really.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 Yeah.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 So- you can tell?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 Pretty much, most of the time. We have a kind of... radar.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 So you don't think I have a, a quality?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 Speaking for my people, I'd have to say no. By the way, your friendBrian from Payroll, he is.
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 He is?
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Lowell	 Yup, and waaay out of your league. 
01	08	0108	The One Where Nana Dies Twice	Chandler	 Out of my league. I could get a Brian.  If Iwanted to get a Brian, I could get a Brian.  Hey, Brian.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Terry, I, I, I know that I haven't worked here very long, but I waswondering, do you think it would be possible if I got a $100 advance in my salary?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Terry	 An advance?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. See, every year wego skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started thewhole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Terry	 Rachel, Rachel, sweetheart. You're a terrible, terrible waitress. Really,really awful.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. I'm with you. Um, but I, but I'mtrying really hard. And I think I'm doing better. I really do. Does anybody need coffee? Oh, look at that.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Excuse me, sir. Hi, you come in here all time. I was just wondering, doyou think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Guy	 Huh?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Ok, ok, that's fine. Fine. Hey, I'm sorry about that spill before. Only $98.50 to go. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Hey. Ross, did you know Mom and Dad are going to Puerto Rico forThanksgiving?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 No, they're not.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Yes, they are. The Blymens invited them.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 You're wrong.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 I am not wrong.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 You're wrong.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 No, I just talked to them.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  I'm calling Mom.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Hey, hey.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Hey.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Hey.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 And this from the cry-for-help department. Are you wearing makeup?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Yes, I am. As of today, I am officially Joey Tribbiani, actor slash model.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 That's so funny, 'cause I was thinking you look more like JoeyTribbiani, man slash woman.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 What were you modeling for?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 You know those posters for the city free clinic?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Oh, wow, so you're gonna be one of those "healthy, healthy, healthyguys"?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 You know, the asthma guy was really cute.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Do you know which one you're gonna be?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 No, but I hear lyme disease is open, so...  
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Good luck, man. I hope you get it.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Thanks.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Well, you were right. How can they do this to us, huh? It'sThanksgiving. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Ok, I'll tell you what. How about I cook dinner at my place? I'll makeit just like Mom's.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Will you make the mashed potatoes with the lumps?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 You know, they're not actually supposed to have...  I'll work on the lumps. Joey, you're going home, right?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Yeah.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 And I assume, Chandler, you are still boycotting all the pilgrimholidays.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Yes, every single one of them.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Phoebe, you're gonna be with your grandma?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yes, and her boyfriend. But we're celebrating Thanksgiving in December'cause he is lunar.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 So you're free Thursday, then.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yeah. Oh, can I come?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Yeah. Rach, are you thinking you're gonna make it to Vail?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Absolutely. Shoop, shoop, shoop. Only a hundred and two dollars to go.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 I thought it was $98.50.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Yeah, well it was. I, I broke a cup.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Well, I'm off to Carol's.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Ooh, ooh! Why don't we invite her?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Ooh, ooh. Because she's my ex-wife, and will probably want tobring her, ooh, ooh, lesbian life partner.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Hi, is uh, is Carol here?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 No, she's at a faculty meeting.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, I uh, just came by to pick up my skull. Well, not mine, but...Susan:Come in.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Thanks. Yeah, Carol borrowed it for a class, and I have to get it back tothe museum.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 What's it look like?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Kinda like a big face without skin.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Yes, I'm familiar with the concept. We can just look for it.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Ok.  Wow, you guys sure have a lot of books aboutbein' a lesbian.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Well, you know, you have to take a course. Otherwise, they don't let youdo it. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Hey, hey, Yertle the Turtle. A classic.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Actually, I'm reading it to the baby.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 The uh, the baby that hasn't been born yet? Wouldn't that mean you're...crazy?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 What, you don't think they can hear sounds in there?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 You're not serious, I mean, you really... you really talk to it?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Yeah, all the time. I want the baby to know my voice.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Do you uh, do you talk about me?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Yeah, yeah, all the time.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Really?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 But um, we just refer to you as Bobo the Sperm Guy.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Look, if she's talking to it, I just think that I should get some bellytime too. Not that I believe any of this.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh, I believe it. I think the baby can totally hear everything. I canshow you. Look, this will seem a little weird, but you put your head inside this turkey,and then we'll all talk, and you'll hear everything we say.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 I'd just like to say that I'm totally behind this experiment. In fact,I'd very much like to butter your head.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Hey, Rach, did you make your money?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 No, not even close. Forget Vail, forget seeing my family, forget shoop,shoop, shoop.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Rach, here's your mail.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  No, here's your mail.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Thanks, you can just put it on the table.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  Would you just open it?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh my god, oh, you guys are great.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 We all chipped in.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	  We did?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  You owe me 20 bucks.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Thank you. Thank you so much!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  Chandler, here you go, got your traditionalThanksgiving feast, you got your tomato soup, your grilled cheese fixin's, and your familysize bag of Funyuns.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Wait, wait, Chandler, this is what you're havin' for Thanksgivingdinner? What, what, what is it with you and this holiday?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 All right, I'm nine years old.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, I hate this story.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 We just finished this magnificent Thanksgiving dinner. I have--and Iremember this part vividly--a mouthful of pumpkin pie, and this is the moment my parentschoose to tell me they're getting divorced.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh my god.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Yes. It's very difficult to appreciate a Thanksgiving dinner onceyou've seen it in reverse.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Uh, hi. We uh, we used to work together.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 We did?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Yeah, at Macy's. You were the Obsession girl, right? I was the Aramis guy. Aramis? Aramis? 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 Yeah, right.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 I gotta tell you. You're the best in the business.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 Get out.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 I'm serious. You're amazing. You know when to spritz, when to lay back.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 Really? You don't know what that means to me.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Ooh, you smell great tonight. What're you wearing?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	  Nothing.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Listen, uh, you wanna go get a drink or something?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 Yeah.  Oh.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 What's wrong?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 I just remembered, I have to do something.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Oh. What?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Girl	 Um, leave.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Wait, wait, wait!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 So I guess you all saw it.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Saw what?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 No, we were just laughing. You know, how laughter can be infectious.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Set another place for Thanksgiving. My entire family thinks I have VD.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Tonight, on a very special Blossom.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Mmm, looking good. Ok, cider's mulling, turkey's turking, yams areyamming.  What?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 I don't know. It's just not the same without Mom in the kitchen.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 All right, that's it. You know what? Just get out of my way and stopmoping.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 That's closer.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 I got the tickets! I got the tickets! Five hours from now, shoop, shoop,shoop.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Oh, you must stop shooping.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Chandler, will you just come in already?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 No, I prefer to keep a safe distance from all this merriment.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Look out, incoming pumpkin pie!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Ok, we all laughed when you did it with the stuffing, but that's notfunny anymore.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Hey, Monica, I got a question. I don't see any tater tots.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 That's not a question.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 But my mom always makes them. It's like a tradition. You get a littlepiece of turkey on your fork, a little cranberry sauce, and a tot! It's bad enough I can'tbe with my family because of my disease.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 All right, fine. Tonight's potatoes will be both mashed with lumps, andin the form of tots.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Ok, I'm off to talk to my unborn child. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Ah!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Ok, Mom never hit.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	  Ok, all done.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 What, Phoebe, did you whip the potatoes? Ross needs lumps!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm sorry, oh, I just, I thought we could have them whipped and thenadd some peas and onions.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why would we do that?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Well, 'cause then they'd be like my mom used to make them, you know,before she died.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Ok, three kinds of potatoes coming up.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Ok, good-bye you guys. Thanks for everything.  Oh, sorry! Oh, sorry!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 The most unbelievable thing has happened. Underdog has just gottenaway.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 The balloon?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 No, no, the actual cartoon character. Of course the balloon. It's allover the news. Right before he reached Macy's, he broke free and was spottedflying over Washington Square Park. I'm goin' to the roof, who's with me?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 I can't, I gotta go.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Come on. An 80-foot inflatable dog let loose over the city. How oftendoes that happen?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Almost never.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Got the keys? or Got the keys!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Ok.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 Anytime you're ready.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Ok, ok, here we go.  Ok, where am Italking to, here? I mean, uh, well, there is one way that seems to offer a certainacoustical advantage, but...
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 Just aim for the bump.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Ok, ok, ok, ok, here goes. You know, I, you know, can't do this. Uh, thisis too weird. I feel stupid.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 So don't do it, it's fine. You don't have to do it just because Susandoes it.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Hello, baby. Hello, hello.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 I loved the moment when you first saw the giant dog shadow all over thepark.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yeah, but did they have to shoot him down? I mean, that was just mean.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Ok, right about now the turkey should be crispy on the outside, juicy onthe inside. Why are we standing here?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 We're waiting for you to open the door. You got the keys.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 No I don't.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Yes, you do. When we left, you said, "got the keys."
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 No I didn't. I asked, "got the ke-eys?"
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 No, no, no, you said, "got the keys".
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Do either of you have the keys?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  The oven is on.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, I gotta get my ticket!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Wait, wait, we have a copy of your key.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Well then get it, get it!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 That tone will not make me go any faster.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  Joey!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 That one will. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 And everyone's telling me, you gotta pick a major, you gotta pick a major.So, on a dare, I picked paleontology. And you have no idea what I'm saying, because, let'sface it, you're a fetus. You're just happy you don't have gills anymore.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 Look, you don't have to talk to it. You can sing to it if you want.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, please. I am not singing to your stomach, ok?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Hi, how's it goin?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Shh!  Here we come, walkin' down the street, get the funniestlooks from, everyone we meet. Hey, hey!  Hey, uh, did you just feel that?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 I did.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Does it always, uh--?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Carol	 No, no that was the first.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 Keep singing! Keep singing!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Hey, hey, you're my baby, and I can't wait to meet you. Whenyou come out I'll buy you a bagel, and then we'll go to the zoo.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Susan	 I felt it!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	  Hey, hey, I'm your daddy. I'm the one without any breasts.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Nope, not that one.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Can you go any faster with that?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Hey, I got one keyhole and about a zillion keys. You do the math.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why do you guys have so many keys in there anyway?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	  For an emergency just like this.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	  All right, listen, smirky. If it wasn'tfor you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this  right now. But I'm not.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 I swear you said you had the keys.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 No, I didn't. I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and Iobviously didn't have the keys.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Ooh, ok, that's it. Enough with the keys. No one say keys.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why would I have the keys?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Aside from the fact that you said you had them?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 But I didn't.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Well, you should have.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Because!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Because!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Why? Because everything is my responsibility? Isn't it enough that I'mmaking Thanksgiving dinner for everyone? You know, everyone wants a different kind ofpotatoes, so I'm making different kinds of potatoes. Does anybody care what kind ofpotatoes I want? Nooooo, no, no!  Just as long as Phoebe gets her peasand onions, and Mario gets his tots, and it's my first Thanksgiving, and it's all burned,and, and I... I...
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Ok, Monica, only dogs can hear you now, so, look, the door's open.Here we go.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Well, the turkey's burnt.  Potatoes are ruined, potatoesare ruined, potatoes are ruined.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 Here we come, walkin' down thethis doesn't smell like Mom's.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 No, it doesn't, does it? But you wanted lumps, Ross?  Well, here you go, buddy, ya got one.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, god, this is great! The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuckhere with you guys.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Hey, we all had better plans. This was nobody's first choice.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Oh, really? So why was I busting my ass to make this deliciousThanksgiving dinner?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 You call that delicious? 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Stop it, stop it, stop it!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Now this feels like Thanksgiving.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Ooh. 
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 What?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Ugly Naked Guy's taking his turkey out of the oven. Oh my god. He's notalone. Ugly Naked Guy's having Thanksgiving dinner with Ugly Naked Gal.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 I've gotta see this. All right Ugly Naked Guy!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Ooh, Ugly Naked Dancing!
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 It's nice that he has someone.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Shall I carve?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 By all means.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Ok, who wants light cheese, and who wants dark cheese?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 I don't even wanna know about the dark cheese.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	  Does anybody wanna split this with me?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 Oh, I will.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Ooh, you guys have to make a wish.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Monica	 Make a wish?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Phoebe	 Come on, you know, Thanksgiving. Ooh, you got the bigger half. What'dyou wish for?
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Joey	 The bigger half.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 I'd like to propose a toast. Little toast here, ding ding. I know thisisn't the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has beenreally great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting.Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been withyour family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know?So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivingssucked.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	All	 That's so sweet.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Ross	 And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Rachel	 And a crappy New Year.
01	09	0109	The One Where Underdog Gets Away	Chandler	 Here, here!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Guys? There's a somebody I'd like you to meet. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	All	 Oooh!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 W-wait. What is that?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 'That' would be Marcel. You wanna say hi?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 No, no, I don't.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Oh, he is precious! Where did you get him?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 My friend Bethel rescued him from some lab.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 That is so cruel! Why? Why would a parent name their child Bethel?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Hey, that monkey's got a Ross on its ass!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Ross, is he gonna live with you, like, in your apartment?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Yeah. I mean, it's been kinda quiet since Carol left, so...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Why don't you just get a roommate?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Nah, I dunno... I think you reach a certain age, having a roommate iskinda pathe-  ....sorry, that's, that's 'pathet', which is Sanskrit for 'reallycool way to live'.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 So you guys, I'm doing all new material tonight. I have twelve new songsabout my mother's suicide, and one about a snowman.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Might wanna open with the snowman.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	All	 Hey, Joey. Hey, buddy.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 So, how'd it go?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Ahhhhhh, I didn't get the job.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 How could you not get it? You were Santa last year.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 I dunno. Some fat guy's sleeping with the store manager. He's not evenjolly, it's all political.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 So what are you gonna be?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Ah, I'm gonna be one of his helpers. It's just such a slap in the face,y'know?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's?  Gee, what?! What is wrong with New Year's?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Nothing for you, you have Paolo. You don't have to face the horriblepressures of this holiday: desperate scramble to find anything with lips just so you canhave someone to kiss when the ball drops!! Man, I'm talking loud!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, soI'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Yeah, you wish!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 It's just that I'm sick of being a victim of this Dick Clark holiday.I say this year, no dates, we make a pact. Just the six of us- dinner.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	All	 Yeah, okay. Alright.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Y'know, I was hoping for a little more enthusiasm. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	All	 Woooo! Yeah!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Phoebe, you're on.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, oh, good.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	  Okay, hi. Ladies and gentlemen, back by populardemand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. Wooh!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	  Thanks, hi. Um, I wanna start with a song that means a lotto me this time of year.   
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	  
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	  
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 No. No, that's- that's okay.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Well, c'mon, if it's important enough to discuss while I'm playing, thenI assume it's important enough for everyone else to hear!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	  That guy's going home with a note!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Noth- I was- I was just saying to my-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Could you speak up please?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	  Sorry, I wa- I was just saying to myfriend that I thought you were the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen in my- in mylife. And then he said that- you said you thought
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Daryl Hannah.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Daryl Hannah was the most beautiful woman that he'd ever seen in his lifeand I said yeah, I liked her in Splash, a lot, but not so much in- in Wall Street, Ithought she had kind of a 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Hard quality.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 -hard quality. And uh, while Daryl Hannah is beautiful in a conventionalway, you are luminous with a kind of a delicate grace. Then, uh, that-that-that's when youstarted yelling. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Okay, we're gonna take a short break. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Hey, that guy's going home with more than a note!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Come here, Marcel. Sit here. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. I mean God, by mysixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! ...Ooh. Did I justshare too much?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Just a smidge.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 David's like, y'know, Scientist Guy. He's very methodical.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 I think it's romantic.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Me too! Oh! Did you ever see An Officer and a Gentleman?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Yeah!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Well, he's kinda like the guy I went to see that with. Except, excepthe-he's smarter, and gentler, and sweeter... I just- I just wanna be with him all thetime. Day and night, and night and day... and special occasions... 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Wait a minute, wait a minute, I see where this is going, you're gonnaask him to New Year's, aren't you. You're gonna break the pact. She's gonna break thepact.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 No, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah, could I just?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Yeah, 'cause I already asked Janice.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 What?!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 C'mon, this was a pact! This was your pact! 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 I snapped, okay? I couldn't handle the pressure and I snapped.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Yeah, but Janice? That-that was like the worst breakup in history!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 I'm not saying it was a good idea, I'm saying I snapped!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Hi. Hi, sorry I'm late.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Too many jokes... must mock Joey! 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Nice shoes, huh? 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Aah, y'killing me!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Ross! He's playing with my spatulas again!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Okay, look, he's not gonna hurt them, right?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Do you always have to bring him here?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 I didn't wanna leave him alone. Alright? We- we had our first fight thismorning. I think it has to do with my working late. I said some things that I didn't mean,and he- he threw some faeces...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Y'know, if you're gonna work late, I could look in on him for you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Oh, that'd be great! Okay, but if you do, make sure it seems like you'rethere to see him, okay, and you're not like doing it as a favour to me.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Okay, but if he asks, I'm not going to lie.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 ...But, you can't actually test this theory, because today's particleaccelerators are nowhere near powerful enough to simulate these conditions.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Okay, alright, I have a question, then. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Yuh.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Um, were you planning on kissing me ever?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Uh, that's definitely a, uh, valid question. And, uh, the answer would be yes. Yes I was. But, see, I wanted it to be this phenomenal kissthat happened at this phenomenal moment, because, well, 'cause it's you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Sure.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Right. But, see, the longer I waited, the more phenomenal the kiss had tobe, and now we've reached a place where it's just gotta be one of those things where Ijust like... sweep everything off the table and throw you down on it. And, uh, I'm notreally a, uh, sweeping sorta fella.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, David, I, I think you are a sweeping sorta fella. I mean, you're asweeper! ...trapped inside a physicist's body.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Rrrreally.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, oh, I'm sure of it. You should just do it, just sweep andthrow me. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 ...Now? Now?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, right now.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Okay, okay, okay.  Y'know what, this was just really expensive.  And I'll take- this was a gift. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Okay, now you're just kinda tidying. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Okay, what the hell, what the hell.  You want me to actually throw you or you-you wanna just hop?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 I can hop. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 So tell me something. What does the phrase 'no date pact' mean to you?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 I'm sorry, okay. It's just that Chandler has somebody, and Phoebe hassomebody- I thought I'd ask Fun Bobby.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Fun Bobby? Your ex-boyfriend Fun Bobby?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Yeah.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 You know more than one Fun Bobby?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 I happen to know a Fun Bob.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	  Okay, here we go...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Ooh ooh ooh ooh, there's no room for milk!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	  There. Now there is.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Okay, so on our no-date evening, three of you now have dates.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Uh, four.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Four.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Five.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Five. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Sorry. Paolo's catching an earlier flight.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Yeah, and I met this really hot single mom at the store. What's an elf todo?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Okay, so I'm gonna be the only one standing there alone when the balldrops?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Oh, c'mon. We'll have, we'll have a big party, and no-one'll know who'swith who.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Hey, y'know, this is so not what I needed right now.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 What's the matter?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Oh, it's-it's Marcel. He keeps shutting me out, y'know? He's walkingaround all the time dragging his hands... 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 That's so weird, I had such a blast with him the other night.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Really.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Yeah, we played, we watched TV.. that juggling thing is amazing.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 What, uh... what juggling thing?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 With the balled-up socks? I figured you taught him that.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 No.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Y'know, it wasn't that big a deal. He just balled up socks... and amelon...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Phoebe. Hi. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, hi Max! Hey, do you know everybody?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 No. Have you seen David?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 No, no, he hasn't been around.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Well, if you see him, tell him to pack his bags. We are going to Minsk.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Minsk?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Minsk. It's in Russia.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 I know where Minsk is.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 We got the grant. Three years, all expenses paid.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 So when, when do you leave?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 January first.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Hello?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Hey!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Hi.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Hi!  What-what're you doing here?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Um, well, Max told me about Minsk, so congratulations! This is so exciting!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 It'd be even more exciting if we were going.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, you're not going?  Oh, why?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Tell her, David. 'I don't wanna go to Minsk and work with Lifson andYamaguchi and Flench, on nonononononono. I wanna stay here and make out with mygirlfriend!!' 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Thank you, Max. Thank you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 So-so you're really not going?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do. I just- you decide.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh don't do that.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Please.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh no no.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 No, but I'm asking-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, but I can't do that-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 No, but I can't-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 It's your thing, and-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 -make the decision-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Okay, um, stay.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Stay.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Stay.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Getting so good at that! 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 It was Max's stuff. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	 I love this artichoke thing! Oh, don't tell me what's in it, the dietstarts tomorrow! 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 You remember Janice.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Vividly.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Hi.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Sandy	 Hi, I'm Sandy.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Sandy! Hi! C'mon in! ...You brought your kids.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Sandy	 Yeah. That's okay, right?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Par-tay! 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 That thing is not coming in here.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 'That thing'? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask yousomething, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldn't be welcome in yourhome?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 I'm guessing your new girlfriend wouldn't urinate on my coffee table.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Okay. He was more embarrassed about that than anyone. Okay? And for him tohave the courage to walk back in here like nothing happened...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Alright. Just keep him away from me.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Thank you.  C'mon, Marcel, whaddya say you and I do alittle mingling?  Alright, I'll, uh... catch up with you later.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Oh my gosh! Rachel, honey.. are you okay? Where-where's Paolo?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Rome. Jerk missed his flight.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 And then... your face is bloated?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 No. Okay. I was at the airport, getting into a cab, when this woman-this blonde planet with a pocketbook- starts yelling at me. Something about how it was hercab first. And then the next thing I know she just starts- starts pulling me out by myhair! So I'm blowing my attack whistle thingy and three more cabs show up, and as I'mgoing to get into a cab she tackles me. And I hit my head on the kerb and cut my lip on mywhistle...oh...everybody having fun at the party?  Are people eating my dip?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Sandy	 Y'know, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the firsttime I ever mentally undressed an elf.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Wow, that's, uh, dirty.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Sandy	 Yeah.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Hey, kids...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	  Look at him. I'm notsaying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	  There you are! Haaah, you got away from me!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	  But you found me!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	 Here, Ross, take our picture.  Smile! You're on Janice Camera!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Kill me. Kill me now. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Hey everybody! It's Fun Bobby!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Fun Bobby	 Hey, sorry I'm late. But my, uh, grandfather, he- died about twohours ago. But I-I-I couldn't get a flight out 'til tomorrow, so here I am!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	  Hey Fun Bobby! Whoah! Who died?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Fun Bobby	 It's gonna be an open casket, y'know, so at least I'll- I get to seehim again.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	  Oh, I'm gonna blow this one up, andI'm gonna write 'Reunited' in glitter.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Alright, Janice, that's it! Janice... Janice... Hey, Janice, when Iinvited you to this party I didn't necessarily think that it meant that we-
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	 Oh, no. Oh, no.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 I'm sorry you misunderstood...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Janice	 Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of thesetimes is just gonna be your last chance with me. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Oh, will you give me the thing. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Hi, Max!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 Yoko.  I've decided to go to Minsk without you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Wow.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Max	 It won't be the same- but it'll still be Minsk. Happy New Year.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Are you alright?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 You're going to Minsk.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 No, I'm... not going to Minsk.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh, you are so going to Minsk. You belong in Minsk. You can't stay herejust 'cause of me.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Yes I can. Because if I go it means I have to break up with you, and Ican't break up with you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Oh yes, yes, yes you can. Just say, um, 'Phoebe, my work is my life andthat's what I have to do right now'. And I say 'your work?! Your work?! How can you saythat?!'. And then you say, um, 'it's tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Can't youunderstand that?'. And I say  'no! No! I can't understand that!'.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 Uh, ow.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Ooh, sorry. Um, and, and then you put your arms around me. And then youput your arms around me.  And, um, and then you tell me that you love me andyou'll never forget me.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	David	 I'll never forget you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 And then you say that it's almost midnight and you have to go becauseyou don't wanna start the new year with me if you can't finish it.  I'm gonnamiss you. You scientist guy.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Dick Clark	  Hi, this is Dick Clark, live in Times Square. We're in avirtual snowstorm of confetti here in Times Square...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 There y'go, kids.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	  And then the peacock bit me. Please kiss me at midnight. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 You seen Sandy?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Ooh. Uh, I don't know how to tell you this, but she's in Monica'sbedroom, getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. Ooh, look at that, I did know how totell you.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 Vrrbddy, the bll is drrbing.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	All	  What?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 The bll is drrbing!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Dick Clark	  In twenty seconds it'll be midnight...
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 And the moment of joy is upon us.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Looks like that no date pact thing worked out.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 Everybody looks so happy. I hate that.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 Not everybody's happy. Hey Bobby!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Y'know, I uh.. just thought I'd throw this out here. I'm no math whiz,but I do believe there are three girls and three guys right here. 
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Phoebe	 I dunno. I don't feel like kissing anyone tonight.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 I can't kiss anyone.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Monica	 So I'm kissing everyone?
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Nonono, you can't kiss Ross, that's your brother.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	 Perfect. Perfect. So now everybody's getting kissed but me.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Chandler	 Alright, somebody kiss me. Somebody kiss me, it's midnight! Somebodykiss me!
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Joey	 Alrightalrightalright.  There.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Ross	  I wanted this to work so much. Imean I'm still in there, changing his diapers, pickin' his fleas... but he's just phoningit in. Just so hard to accept the fact that something you love so much doesn't love youback.
01	10	0110	The One With The Monkey	Rachel	 ...I think that bitch cracked my tooth.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Do you think they have yesterday's daily news?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Why?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Just wanna check my horoscope, see if it was right.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Oh my God.  Phoebe. Don't look now, butbehind us is a guy who has the potential to break our hearts and plunge us into a pit ofdepression. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Where?  Ooh, come to Momma.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 He's coming. Be cool, be cool, be cool.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Guy	 Nice hat.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica, Phoebe	  Thanks.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 We should do something. Whistle.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 We are not going to whistle.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Come on, do it.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 No!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Do it!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 No!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Do it do it do it!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	  Woo-woo!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I can't believe you did that!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Why did I 'woo-hoo'? I mean, what was I hoping would happen? That-thathe'd turn round and say 'I love that sound, I must have you now'?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I just wish there was something we could do.  Hello. Hello, Coma Guy. GET UP, YOU GIRL SCOUT! UP! UP! UP!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Phoebe, what are you doing?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Maybe nobody's tried this.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I wish we at least knew his name... Look at that face. I mean, evensleeping, he looks smart. I bet he's a lawyer.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Yeah, but did you see the dents in his knuckles? That means he'sartistic.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Okay, he's a lawyer, who teaches sculpting on the side. And- he candance!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Oh! And, he's the kinda guy who, when you're talking, he's listening,y'know, and not saying 'Yeah, I understand' but really wondering what you look like naked.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I wish all guys could be like him.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I know.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Are there no conscious men in the city for you two?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 He doesn't have anyone.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Yeah, we-we feel kinda responsible.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 I can't believe you said woowoo. I don't even say woowoo.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Oh, she's coming up! She's coming up! 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Jay Leno	  Folks, when we come back we'll be talking about her new book,'Euphoria Unbound': the always interesting Nora Tyler Bing. You might wanna put the kidsto bed for this one.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Y'know, we don't have to watch this. Weekend At Bernie's ison Showtime, HBO, and Cinemax.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 No way, forget it.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 C'mon, she's your mom!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Exactly. Weekend At Bernie's! Dead guy getting hit in thegroin twenty, thirty times! No?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! I love her books! Icannot get on a plane without one! I mean, this is so cool!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yeah, well, you wouldn't think it was cool if you're eleven years oldand all your friends are passing around page 79 of 'Mistress Bitch.'
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 C'mon, Chandler, I love your mom. I think she's a blast.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 You can say that because she's not your mom.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Oh, please...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Paolo	 Bona sera.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Oh, hi sweetie. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 When did Rigatoni get back from Rome?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Last night.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Ah, so then his plane didn't explode in a big ball of fire?... Just adream I had- but, phew.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Hey hey hey! She's on!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Paolo	 Ah! Nora Bing!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Jay Leno	  ...Now what is this about you-you being arrested i-in London?What is that all about?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Your mom was arrested?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Shhh, busy beaming with pride.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  ...This is kind of embarrassing, but occasionally after I'vebeen intimate with a man...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Now why would she say that's embarrassing?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	All	 Shhh.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  ...I just get this craving for Kung Pow Chicken.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 THAT'S TOO MUCH INFORMATION!!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Jay Leno	  Alright, so now you're doing this whole book tour thing, howis that going?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  Oh, fine. I'm leaving for New York tomorrow, which I hate-but I get to see my son, who I love...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	All	 Awww!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 This is the way that I find out. Most moms use the phone.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Jay Leno	  Y'know, don't take this wrong, I-I just don't see you a-as amom, somehow.. I don't mean that, I don't mean that bad...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  Oh no, I am a fabulous mom! I bought my son his firstcondoms.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 ...And then he burst into flames.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Let's see. Congress is debating a new deficit reduction bill... themayor wants to raise subway fares again... the high today was forty-five... and- oh, teamsplayed sports.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 What about Glen? He could be a Glen. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Nah... not-not special enough.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Ooh! How about Agamemnon?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Waaay too special.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 I am famished. What do I want... 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Please God don't let it be Kung Pow Chicken.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Oh, you watched the show! What'd you think?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Well, I think you need to come out of your shell just a little.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	  What is this dive? Only you could've picked this place.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Oooh, c'mon, shut up, it's fun. Gimme a hug. Well, I think we're ready for some tequila.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 I know I am.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Who's doing shots?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Yeah.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I'm in.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 There y'go. Ross?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Uh, I'm not really a shot drinking kinda guy.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Hi! Sorry- sorry we're late, we, uh, kinda just, y'know, lost track oftime.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 ...But a man can change. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Anyone want me to appraise anything?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you, I've read everything you've ever written.No, I mean it! I mean, when I read Euphoria at Midnight, all I wanted to do was become awriter.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Oh, please, honey, listen, if I can do it, anybody can. You juststart with half a dozen European cities, throw in thirty euphemisms for male genitalia,and bam! You have got yourself a book.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Myyy mother, ladies and gentlemen.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Yeah, any messages for room 226?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 You okay there, slugger?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Yeah, I'm fine, I'm fine. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 What is with you tonight?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Nothing. Nothing nothing nothing.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  Okay, thank you.  It's the Italian Hand-Licker,isn't it.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 No. It's the one he's licking.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 She's supposed to be with you.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 You're good.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Oh, Ross, listen to me. I have sold a hundred million copies of mybooks, and y'know why?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 The girl on the cover with her nipples showing?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 No. Because I know how to write men that women fall in love with.Believe me, I cannot sell a Paolo. People will not turn three hundred twenty-five pagesfor a Paolo. C'mon, the guy's a secondary character, a, y'know, complication youeventually kill off.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 When?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 He's not a hero. ...You know who our hero is.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 The guy on the cover with his nipples showing?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 No, it's you!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Please.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 No, really, c'mon. You're smart, you're sexy...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Right.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 You are gonna be fine, believe me.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Uh-oh...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Uhhhh.... I'll just pee in the street.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Hey, is Chandler here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Yeah.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay, uh, about last night, um, Chandler.. you didn't tell...  Okay, 'cause I'm thinking- we don't need to tell Chandler, I mean, it was just akiss, right? One kiss? No big deal? Right?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Right. No big deal.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 In Bizarro World!! You broke the code!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 What code?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 You don't kiss your friend's mom! Sisters are okay, maybe a hot-lookin'aunt... but not a mom, never a mom!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 What are you guys doing out here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Uh.. uh.. Well, Joey and I had discussed getting in an early morningracquetball game. But, um, apparently, somebody overslept.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Yeah, well, you don't have your racket.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 No, no I don't, because it's being restrung, somebody was supposed tobring me one.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Yeah, well you didn't call and leave your grip size.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Okay, you guys spend waaaay too much time together. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay, I'm scum, I'm scum.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Ross, how could you let this happen?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 I don't know, God, I... well, it's not like she's a regular mom, y'know?She's, she's sexy, she's...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 You don't think my mom's sexy?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Well... not in the same way...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 I'll have you know that Gloria Tribbiani was a handsome woman in her day,alright? You think it's easy giving birth to seven children?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay, I think we're getting into a weird area here...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 What're you guys doing out here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Well, not playing raquetball!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 He forgot to leave his grip size!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 He didn't get the goggles!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Well,sounds like you two have issues.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Goodbye, baby.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Paolo	 Ciao, bela.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Do they wait for me to do this?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 So are you gonna tell him?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Why would I tell him?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 How about 'cause if you don't, his mother might.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Oh...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	  What are you guys doing here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Uhhhh.... he's not even wearing a jockstrap!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 ...What did I ask?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Hi.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Hi.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 What are you doing here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Nothing, I just thought I'd stop by.. y'know, after the uh... that I..y'know, so what are you doing here?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I'm not really here. Just thought I'd drop these off...on the way.. myway... Do you come here a lot? Without me?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 No.  No! No!...So, um, do you think he's doing any better than he was this morning?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 How would I know? I-I wasn't here.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Really? Not even to, um, change his PAJAMAS?! 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Oh my God. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 You're my friend. I-I had to tell you.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 I can't believe it. Paolo kissed my mom?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Yeah, um, I don't know if you noticed, but he had a lot to drink, and youknow how he gets when he's drun..uh...  Ican't do this, I did it, it was me, I'm sorry, I kissed your mom.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 What?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 I was really upset about Rachel and Paolo, and I think I had too muchtequila, and Nora- um, Mrs. Mom- your Bing- was just being nice, y'know, and- But nothinghappened, nothing- Ask Joey, Joey, uh, came in-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	  You knew about this?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Uh... y'know, knowledge is a tricky thing.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 I spent the entire day with you, why didn't you tell me?!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Hey, hey, hey, you're lucky I caught them when I did, or else who knowswhat woulda happened.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Thanks, man, big help.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	  I can't believe this! What the hell were you thinking?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 I wasn't- I mean, I-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Y'know, of all my friends, no-one knows the crap I go through with mymom more than you. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 I know-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 I can't believe you did this. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Chandler-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Me neither, y'know what-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 I'm still mad at you for not telling me.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 What are you mad at me for?!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Chandler-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 You gotta let me slam the door! 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	  Chandler, I didn't kiss her, he did!  Seewhat happens when you break the code?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Joey-
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Ah!  Huh? 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	  'A Woman Undone, by Rachel Karen Green'. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Yeah. Thought I'd give it a shot. I'm still on the first chapter. Now,do you think his 'love stick can be liberated from its denim prison'?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	  Yeah, I'd say so. And there's no 'j' in 'engorged'.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	  Hey Rach.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Hello.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Hello. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Going to the hospital tonight?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 No, you?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 No, you?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 You just asked me.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Okay, maybe it was a trick question.  Um, Rachel canwe do this now?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Okay.  I am so hot!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	  Now, here's a picture of my mother and father ontheir wedding day. Now you tell me she's not a knockout.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 I cannot believe we're having this conversation.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 C'mon! Just try to picture her not pregnant, that's all.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	  Central Perk is proud to present Miss Phoebe Buffay.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Thanks. Hi, um, 'kay. I'd like to start with a song that's about a manthat I recently met, who's, um, come to be very important to me. 'Kay.  
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	  Okay, that was Phoebe Buffay, everybody. Woo!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 What was that?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Oh, uh, Phoebe just started a...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yeah, I believe I was talking to Joey, alright there, Mother-Kisser?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	  Mother-Kisser...  I'll shut up.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Chandler, can I just say something? I-I know you're still mad at me, Ijust wanna say that there were two people there that night. Okay? Two sets of lips.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yes, well, I expect this from her. Okay? She's always been a Freudiannightmare. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay, well, if she always behaves like this, why don't you say something?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Because it's complicated, it's complex- Hey, you kissed my mom!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	  We're rehearsing a Greek play.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 That's very funny. We done now?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 No! Okay, you mean, you're not gonna talk to her, you're not gonna tellher how you feel?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 That would be no. Look, just because you played tonsil tennis with mymom doesn't mean you know her. Alright? Trust me, you can't talk to her.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Okay, 'you' can't, or  you can't?  Okay, that's my finger. That's, that's my knee.  Still doing the play. Aaah!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Alright, whadyou do with him?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Oh! You're awake!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Look at you! How, how do you feel?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 Uh, a little woozy, but basically okay.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 You look good!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 I feel good! ...Who are you?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Oh, sorry.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I'm Phoebe Buffay.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I'm Monica Geller. I've been taking care of you.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Well, we both have.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 So, the Etch-a-Sketch is from you guys?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Well, actually it's just from me.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I got you the foot massager.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 You know who shaved you? That was me.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 I read to you.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I sang.  Hah!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 Well,... thanks.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Oh, my pleasure.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 You're welcome.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 So. I guess I'll see you around.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 What, that's it? 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 "See you around?"
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 Well, what do you want me to say?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 Oh, I don't know. Maybe, um, "That was nice?" Admit somethingto me? "I'll call you?" 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Coma Guy	 Alright, I'll call you.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 I don't think you mean that.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 This is so typical. Y'know, we give, and we give, and we give. And then-we just get nothing back! And then one day, y'know, it's just, you wake up, and "Seeyou around!" Let's go, Phoebe.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Phoebe	 Y'know what? We thought you were different. But I guess it was just thecoma.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Car's waiting downstairs, I just wanted to drop off these copies ofmy book for your friends. Anything you want from Lisbon?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 No, just knowing you're gonna be there is enough.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Alright, well, be good, I love you. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 You kissed my best Ross! ...Or something to that effect.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	  O-kay. Look, it, it was stupid.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Really stupid.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Really stupid. And I don't even know how it happened. I'm sorry,honey, I promise it will never happen again. Are we okay now?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yeah. No. No...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Ah, the forbidden love of a man and his door.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Shh. He did it. He told her off, and not just about the kiss, abouteverything.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 You're kidding.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 No, no. He said "When are you gonna grow up and start being amom?"
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Wow!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Then she came back with "The question is, when are you gonna grow upand realise I have a bomb?"
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 'Kay, wait a minute, are you sure she didn't say "When are you gonnagrow up and realise I am your mom?"
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 That makes more sense.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 So, what's going on now?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 I dunno, I've been standing here spelling it out for you!  I don't hear anything. Oh, wait, wait, wait. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Whaddya see?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 Hard to tell, they're so tiny and upside-down. Wait, wait. They're walkingaway... they're walking away... No, no they're not, they're coming right at us! Run! Run!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 You okay, kiddo?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yeah, okay.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Alright. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Nice save.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	  Mrs. Bing.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Mrs. Bing	 Mr. Geller.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Hey.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 You mean that?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Yeah, why not.  So I told her.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Yeah? How'd it go?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Awful. Awful. Couldn'ta gone worse. 
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Well, howdya feel?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Chandler	 Pretty good! I told her.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Well, see? So, maybe it wasn't such a bad idea, y'know, me kissing yourmom, uh? Huh?  But.. we don't have to godown that road.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Okay. Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolutehonest opinion. Oh, oh, and on page two, he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Monica	 What's a 'niffle'?
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Joey	 You usually find them on the 'heaving beasts'.
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Alright, alright, so I'm not a great typist...
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Ross	 Wait, did you get to the part about his 'huge throbbing pens'? Tell ya,you don't wanna be around when he starts writing with those!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	Rachel	 Alright, that's it! Give it back! That's it!
01	11	0111	The One With Mrs. Bing	All	 Nooo! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, we're done.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Aunt Syl, stop yelling! All I'm saying is that if you had toldme vegetarian lasagna, I would have made vegetarian lasagna.  Well, the meat's only every third layer, maybe you could scrape.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Ross, did you really read all these baby books?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Yup! You could plunk me down in the middle of any woman's uterus, nocompass, and I can find my way out of there like that! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Ooh, this is cool...it says in some parts of the world, people actuallyeat the placenta. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 And, we're done with the yogurt. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	  Sorry. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Aunt Syl, I did this as a favor, I am not a caterer. What do you want meto do with a dozen lasagnas?  Nice talk, AuntSyl.  You kiss Uncle Freddie with that mouth?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Hey Ross, listen, you know that right now, your baby's only this big? This is your baby.  Hi Daddy! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Hello!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	  How come you don't live with Mommy?  How come Mommy lives with that other lady?  What's a lesbian? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Honey, you can say it, Poconos, Poconos, it's like Poc-o-nos 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Ah, poke  a nose, mmm 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler, Ross	 Mma, Mma, Mmaah
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 So, did I hear Poconos?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Yes, my sister's giving us her place for the weekend.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Woo-hoo, first weekend away together!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Yeah, that's a big step.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I know...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	  Ah, it's just a weekend, big deal!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Wasn't this supposed to be just a fling, huh? Shouldn't it be... flung by now?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I mean, we are way past the fling thing, I mean, I am feeling thingsthat I've only read about in Danielle Steele books, you know? I mean, when I'm with him,I'm totally, totally...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 ...nauseous, I'm physically nauseous. What am I supposed to do, huh? Callimmigration?  I could call immigration!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 I love babies, with their little baby shoes, and their little baby toes,and their little baby hands... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Ok, you're going to have to stop that, forever!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Need a new table.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 You think?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Hey hey, come on in!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Hey, hello! mmwa!  I brought all the books, and Monica sendsher love, along with this lasagna. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Oh great! Is it vegetarian, 'cause Susan doesn't eat meat.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  I'm pretty sure that it is...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 So, I got the results of the amnio today.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Oh, tell me, tell me, iseverything, uhh....? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Totally and completely healthy!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Oh, that's great, that is great! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Hey, when did you and Susan meet Huey Lewis?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Uh, that's our friend Tanya.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Of course it's your friendTanya. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Don't you want to know about the sex?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  The sex?  Um, I'm having enoughtrouble with the image of you and Susan together, when you throw in Tanya , yaw...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 The sex of the baby, Ross.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Oh, you know the sex of the baby? Oh, oh-oh-oh!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Do you want to know?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 No, no, no, no, no, I don't want to know, absolutely not. I think, youknow, I think you should know until you look down there, and say, oop, there it is! Or isn't...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Susan	 Oh, hello Ross!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Susan...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Susan	 So, so, did you hear?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Yes, we did, everything's A-OK!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Susan	 Oh, that's so...  Itreally is...do we know...?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Yes, we certainly do, it's going to be...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Oh, hey hey hey, ho ho ho, hello, guywho doesn't want to know, standing right here!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Susan	 Oh, well, is it what we thought it would be?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Mm-hmmm 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Ok, what, what...ok, what did we think it was going to be? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol, Susan	 It's a...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  No, no, no I don't want to know, don't want toknow. Ok, you know, I should probably, I should probably just go. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Well, thanks for the books.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 No problem, ok, mmmwa  oh, mmmwa  Susan... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Susan	 All right, who should we call first, your folks, or Deb and Rona?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Carol	 Hello?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Uh, never mind, I don't want to know. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Ok, so it's just because it was my table, I have to buy a new one?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 That's the rule.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 What rule? There's no rule, if anything, you owe me a table!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 How'd you get to that?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Well, I believe the piece of furniture was fine until your littlebreakfast adventure with Angela Delvecchio
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 You knew about that?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Well, let's just say the impressions you made in the butter leftlittle to the imagination.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Ok, ok, How about if we split it?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 What do you mean, like, buy it together?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Yeah
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 You think we're ready for something like that?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Why not?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Well, it's a pretty big commitment, I mean, what if one of us wants tomove out?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Why, are you moving out?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 I'm not moving out. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 You'd tell me if you were moving out right
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah, it's just that with my last roommate Kip...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Aw, I know all about Kip!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 It's just that we bought a hibachi together, and then he ran off andgot married, and things got pretty ugly.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Well, let me ask you something, was Kip a better roommate than me?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Aw, don't do that
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe'S Assistant	 We've got a couple changes in your schedule. Your4:00 herbal massage has been pushed back to 4:30 and Miss Somerfield canceled her 5:30shiatsu.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Ok, thanks. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe'S Assistant	 Oh, here comes your 3:00. I don't mean to soundunprofessional, but, yum 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Buon Giorno, Bella Phoebe!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, Paolo, hi, what are you doing here?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Uh, Racquela tell me you massage, eh?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Well, Racquela's right, yeah!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, I don't know what you just said, so let's get started.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Uh, I am, uh, being naked?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Um, that's really your decision, I mean, some people prefer, you know,to take off...oh whoops! You're being naked!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	  I can't believe you don't want to know. I mean, Icouldn't not know, I mean, if, if the doctor knows, and Carol knows, and Susan knows.... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 And Monica knows...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Wha, heh, how could you know, I don't even know!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Carol called me to thank me for the lasagna, I asked, she told me.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 So what's it gonna be? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Waitohheyhuh, oh great now he knows, and I don't know!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 I'm sorry, I'm just excited about being an aunt!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Or an uncle... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler	 Hey Phoebe!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Hi Pheebs!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Pheebs!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Fine!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Phoebe, what's the matter?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Nothing, I'm sorry, I'm just, I'm out of sorts.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Customer	 Hey, can we get some cappuccino over here?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh, right, that's me!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Hey, Chandler, that table place closes at 7, come on.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Fine. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Phoebe, what is it?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 All right, you know Paolo?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I'm familiar with his work, yes...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Well, he made a move on me.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Whoa, store will be open tomorrow!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 More coffee over here, please!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Well, what happened?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Well, he came in for a massage, and everything was fine until.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler	  Ooooohh!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 My God.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Are you sure?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, I'm sure. And all of a sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Was it...?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, boy scouts could have camped under there.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Guys	 Oooooo....
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 "Ooo," what?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Uma Thurman.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Oh!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 The actress!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Thanks Rach.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 So what are you gonna do?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 You have to tell her! You have to tell her! It's your moral obligation, asa friend, as a woman, I think it's a feminist issue! Guys? Guys? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, you have to tell her.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Feminist issue. That's where I went!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 She is gonna hate me.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Yeah, well...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Will you pick one, just pick one! Here, how about that one? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 That's patio furniture!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 So what, like people are gonna come in and think, "Uh-oh, I'm outsideagain?" Of course!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	  What about the birds?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 I don't know, birds just don't say, "Hello, sit here, eatsomething."
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 You pick one.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 All right, how about the ladybugs?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Oh, so, forget about the birds, but big red insects suggest finedining!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Fine, you want to get the birds, get the birds!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Not like that, I won't!  Kip would have liked the birds! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Hey!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Hi Pheebs!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Are you moving out?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 No, these aren't all my suitcases.  This one's Paolo's.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Um, um, Rachel can we talk for a sec?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Well, sure...just a sec, though, 'cause Paolo's on his way over.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh!  Ok, um, ok, um, 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh, Pheebs, Pheebs...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Ok, um,  we haven't known each other for that long atime, and, um, there are three things that you should know about me. One, my friends arethe most important thing in my life, two, I never lie, and three, I make the best oatmealraisin cookies in the world. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	  Ok, thanks Pheebs  Oh my God, why have I never tasted these before?!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't make them a lot because I don't think it's fair to the othercookies
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 All right, well, you're right, these are the best oatmeal cookies I'veever had.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Which proves that I never lie.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I guess you don't.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Paolo made a pass at me.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 So, what do you think?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I think It's the most beautiful table I've ever seen.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 I know!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 So how does this work, you going to balance the plates on these littleguys' heads?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Who cares, we'll eat at the sink! Come on, let's play!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Heads up Ross!  Score!  You suck!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Are you okay?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I need some milk.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Ok, I've got milk Here you go...  Oh! Better?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 No...oh, I feel so stupid! Oh, I think about the otherday with you guys and I was all "Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feelso..." Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 I'm so embarrassed, I'm the one he hit on!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel, Phoebe	 I'm so sorry! No I'm sorry! No I'm sorry! NoI'm sorry! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 No, wait, oh, what are we sorry about?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I don't know...right, he's the pig!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Such a pig!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh, God, he's such a pig, 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh he's like a...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 He's like a big disgusting... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 ...like a...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 ...pig...pig man!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Yes, good! Ok...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	  Oh, but he was my pig man...how did I not see this?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	  Oh! I know!  It's because... he'sgorgeous, and he's charming, and when he looks at you...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Ok, Ok, Pheebs...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 The end.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh, God...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Should I not have told you?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 No, no, trust, me, it's, it's, it's much better that I know. Uh, I justliked it better before it was better...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 I think she took it pretty well. You know Paolo's over there right now,so...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 We should get over there and see if she's okay.  Just one...second! Score!  Game!Come on. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  Ah...ooh! Well, looks like, uh, we kicked yourbutts.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 No-no, she kicked our butts. You could be on the Olympic standing-thereteam.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Come on, two on one.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 What are you still doing here? She just broke up with the guy, it'stime for you to swoop in!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 What, now?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Yes, now is when you swoop! You gotta make sure that when Paolo walks outof there, the first guy Rachel sees is you, She's gotta know that you're everything he'snot! You're like, like the anti-Paolo!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 My Catholic friend is right. She's distraught. You're there for her.You pick up the pieces, and then you usher in the age of Ross! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 No, that's cold, that's cold, that's...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  How's it going?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Don't stare. Now she just finished throwing his clothes off the balcony,now there's just a lot of gesturing and arm-waving, , Ok, that is either, "How could you?" or, "Enormousbreasts!" Here he comes! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Ooh!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Uh, I am, uh, to say good-bye.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, ok bye-bye.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Paolo, I really hate you for what you did to Rachel,  but I still have five of these, so heat it at 375 until the cheese bubbles.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Paolo	 Grazie.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Paolo, I-I just want to tell you and I think I speak for everyone when Isay... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Oh, just look at her... 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Oh you guys, I-I really think just one of us should go out there so she'snot overwhelmed...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Oh, you're right.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  ...and I really think it should be me.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Hey.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Hey.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 You all right?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Ooh, I've been better...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Come here.  Listen, you deserve so much better thanhim...you know, I mean, you, you, you should be with a guy who knows what he has when hehas you.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh, Ross...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 What?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 I am so sick of guys. I don't want to look at another guy, I don't wantto think about another guy, I don't even want to be near another guy. 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Huh.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh Ross, you're so great!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Ohhhh 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Ooh...hey honey, are you all right?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Oh...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 You ok?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 ...medium...hmm...any cookies left?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Phoebe	 Yep!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 See, Rach, uh, see, I don't think that swearing off guys altogether is theanswer. I really don't. I think that what you need is to develop a more sophisticatedscreening process.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 No. I just need to be by myself for a while, you know? I just got tofigure out what I want
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Uh, no, no, see, because not...not all guys are going to be a Paolo.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow upto be one.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	  What? 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 What?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I-I'm, I'm having a boy?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Rachel	 Uh...no. No, no, in fact, you're not having a boy.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 Wha-I'm having, I'm having a boy!  Huh, am I having a boy?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Girls	 Yes, you're having a boy! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I'm having a boy! Oh, I'm having a boy!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Wha-
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Wha-
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler	 What is it?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I'm having a boy! I-I'm having a boy!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Hey!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Hey!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler	 We already knew that! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Ross	 I'm having a son. Um...
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Yes! And that would be a shut-down!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey, Chandler	 Shut-out!! 
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 Where are you guys going? Come on, one more game!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Uh, it's 2:30 in the morning!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	 Yeah, get out!
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Monica	 You guys are always hanging out in my apartment! Come on, I'll only usemy left hand, huh? Come on, wussies!  All right, ok, Igotta go. I'm going,  and I'm gone.
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Chandler	  One more game?
01	12	0112	The One With The Dozen Lasagnas	Joey	 Oh yeah!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 That is it! You just barge in here, you don't knock
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 I'm sorry!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 You have no respect for anybody's privacy!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Rachel, wait, wait.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 No, you wait! This is ridiculous!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Can I just say one thing?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 What? What?!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 That's a relatively open weave and I can still see your... nipularareas.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Oh!!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, honey, honey, tell them the story about your patient who thinksthings are, like, other things. Y'know? Like, the phone rings and she takes a shower.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 That's pretty much it.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oops!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 But you tell it really well, sweetie.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Thanks. Okay, now go away so we can talk about you.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Okay. I'll miss you.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Isn't he great?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 He's so cute! And he seems to like you so much.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 I know, I know. So sweet... and so complicated. And for a shrink, he'snot too shrinky, y'know?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 So, you think you'll do it on his couch?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't know, I don't know. I think that's a little weird, y'know?Vinyl.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Okaaay.  Any of you guys want anything else?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Oh, yes, could I have one of those. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 No, I'm sorry, we're all out of those. Anybody else?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Okay.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Did I, uh, did I miss something?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 No, she's still upset because I saw her boobies.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 You what? Wh what were you doing seeing her boobies?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 It was an accident. Not like I was across the street with a telescopeand a box of donuts.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Okay, okay, could we change the subject, please?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Yeah, 'cause hello, these are not her boobies, these are her breasts.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Okay, Pheebs, I was hoping for more of a change.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Y'know, I don't know why you're so embarrassed, they were very niceboobies.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Nice? They were nice. I mean, that's it? I mean, mittens are nice.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Okaaay,  rock, hard place, me.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 You're so funny! He's really funny! I wouldn't wanna be there when whenthe laughter stops.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Whoah whoah, back up there, Sparky. What'd you mean by that?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Oh, just seems as though that maybe you have intimacy issues. Y'know,that you use your humour as a way of keeping people at a distance.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Huh.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 I mean hey! I just met you, I don't know you from Adam. ...Only child,right? Parents divorced before you hit puberty.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Uhhuh, how did you know that?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 It's textbook.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Hey you guys. Hey, you all know my dad, right?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Hey! Hey, Mr. Trib!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Hey, how long are you in the city?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Just for a coupla days. I got a job midtown. I figure I'm betteroff staying with the kid than hauling my ass back and forth on the ferry.  Idon't know this one.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, this is my friend Roger.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Hi. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Hey, hey. Good to meet you, Roger.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 You too, sir.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	  What happened to the, uh, puppet guy?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Dad, dad. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Oh, 'scuse me. So Ross, uh, how's the wife?  Off there too, uh? Uh, Chandler, quick, say somethingfunny!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Gotta go. I miss you too, I love you, but it's getting real latenow
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	  Hey Ma. Listen, I made the appointment with Dr.Bazida, and... Excuse me?  Did you know this isn't Ma?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Her name's Ronni. She's a pet mortician. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Sure. So how long you been... 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Remember when you were a little kid, I used to take you to thenavy yard and show you the big ships?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Since then?!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 No, it's only been six years. I just wanted to put a nice memoryin your head so you'd know that I wasn't always such a terrible guy. ...Joe. Y'ever beenin love?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 ...I d'know.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Then y'haven't. You're burning your tomatoes.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 You're one to talk. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Joe, your dad's in love big time. And the worst part of it is,it's with two different women.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Oh man. Please tell me one of 'em is Ma.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Of course, course one of 'em's Ma. What's the matter with you.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 It's like if you woke up one day and found out your dad was leading thisdouble life. He's like actually some spy, working for the C.I.A.  That'd becool.... This blows!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 I know, I mean, why can't parents just stay parents?  Why do they have to becomepeople? Why do they have...  Why can't you stop staring at my breasts?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	  What?  What?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Did you not get a good enough look the other day?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Alright, alright. We're all adults here, there's only one way to resolvethis. Since you saw her boobies, I think, uh, you're gonna have to show her your peepee.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Y'know, I don't see that happening?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 C'mon, he's right. Tit for tat.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Well I'm not showing you my 'tat.'
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Hello?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	  It's Phoebe.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	  And Rog.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 C'mon up.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	  Oh, good. Rog is here.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 What's the matter with Rog?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Yeah.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Oh, it's nothing, it's a little thing... I hate that guy.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 What, so he was a little analytical. That's what he does, y'know? C'mon,he's not that bad.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Y'see, that's where you're wrong. Why would I marry her if I thought onany level thatthat she was a lesbian?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 I dunno. Maybe you wanted your marriage to fail.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Why? Why would I why? Why? Why? Why?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 I don't know. Maybe maybe low self-esteem, maybe maybe to compensate forovershadowing a sibling, maybe you...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Wait-wait, go back to that sibling thing.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Well, I don't know. I mean, it's conceivable that you wanted to sabotageyour marriage so that the sibling would feel less of a failure in the eyes of the parents.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 That that's ridiculous! I don't feel guilty for her failures!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Oh! So you think I'm a failure!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Isn't he good?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Nonono, thatthat's not what I was saying...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Y'know, all these years, I thought you were on my side. But maybe whatyou were doing was sucking up to Mom and Dad so they'd keep liking you better!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 You're right! I mean you're right! It wasn't just the Weebles, but itwas the Weeble Play Palace, and and the Weebles' Cruise Ship. Oh, which had this littlelifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 That's tough. Tough stuff. C'mon, Pheebs, we're gonna catch that movie,we gotta get going. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. Feel better, Rachel, 'kay?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Geez, we're gonna be late, sweetie...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. Listen, thanks for everything, Mon.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 You're welcome.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Listen guys, it was great seeing you again. Mon, um, easy on thosecookies, okay? Remember, they're just food, they're not love.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Hate that guy! 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Night, you guys.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Oh look, it's the woman we ordered.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Hey. Can, uh, can we help you?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh, no thanks, I'm just waiting for, uh, Joey Tribbiani.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 I'm Joey Tribbiani.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh no, not you, big Joey. Oh my God, you're so much cuter than yourpictures!  I-I'm, I'm Ronni....Cheese Nip?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Uh, Joey's having an embolism, but I'd go for a Nip, y'know?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Now, y'see, most people, when their pets pass on, they want 'em sortalaid out like they're sleeping. But occasionally you get your person who wants them in apose. Like, chasing their tail,  or, uh, jumping to catch a frisbee.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Joey, if I go first, I wanna be looking for my keys.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 That's a good one!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Hey, Joe.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Dad, Ronni's here.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Huh?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Hi.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Hey! Hello, babe! Wh what're what're you doing here?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh, uh, well, you left your good hair at my apartment, I figured you'dneed it tomorrow for your meeting. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Thank you. Uh...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 So, who's up for a big game of Kerplunk?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Look, I uh, I shouldn'ta come. I-I'd better get going, I don't wanna missthe last train.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 I don't want you taking that thing.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh, where'm I gonna stay, here?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Who-ah-ho.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 We'll go to a hotel.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	  We'll go to a hotel.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 No you won't.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 No we won't.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 If you go to a hotel you'll be...doing stuff. I want you right here whereI can keep an eye on you.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 You're gonna keep an eye on us?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 That's right, mister, and I don't care how old you are, as long as you'reunder my roof you're gonna live by my rules. And that means no sleeping with yourgirlfriend.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Wow. He's strict.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Now dad, you'll be in my room, Ronni uh, you can stay in Chandler's room.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Thanks. You're, uh, you're a good kid.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 C'mon, I'll show you to my room. ...That sounds so weird when it's notfollowed by "No thanks, it's late." 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Okay. Now this is just for tonight. Starting tomorrow, you gotta make achange. This has gone on long enough.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 What kinda change?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Well, either you break it off with Ronni
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 I can't do that!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Then you gotta come clean with Ma! This is not right!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Yeah, but this is
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 I don't wanna hear it! Now go to my room!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Hey, Kicky. What're you doing?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Just trying to get comfortable. I can't sleep in my underwear. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Well, you're gonna.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 I've been thinking. Y'know, about how I'm always seeing girls on top ofgirls...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Are they end to end, or tall like pancakes?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Y'know what I mean, about how I'm always going out with all these women.And I always figured, when the right one comes along, I'd be able to be a stand-up guy andgo the distance, y'know? Now I'm looking at my dad, thinking...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Hey, you're not him. You're you. When they were all over you to gointo your father's pipe-fitting business, did you cave?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 No.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 No. You decided to go into the out-of-work actor business. Now thatwasn't easy, but you did it! And I'd like to believe that when the right woman comesalong, you will have the courage and the guts to say "No thanks, I'm married."
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 You really think so?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Yeah. I really do.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Thanks, Chandler. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Get off!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Hi.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Hi...May I help you?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Yeah, uh, Joey said I could use your shower, since, uh, Chandler's inours?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Okay...who are you?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh, I'm Ronni. Ronni Rappelano? The mistress?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Oh, c'mon in.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Thanks.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Hi, I'm Rachel.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Hi.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Bathroom's up there.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Great.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Hey, listen, Ronni, how long would you say Chandler's been in theshower?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ronni	 Oh, like, uh, five minutes?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Perfect. Fasten your seatbelts, it's peepee time.  Hey, Mr. Trib. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Hey. Morning, dear.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Chandler Bing? It's time to see your thing.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	  What's the matter with you?!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 I thought it was Chandler!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	  What? What?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Sorry, my my thing was in there with me.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Hey, Pheebs.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Hey. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 How's it going?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Good. Oh oh! Roger's having a dinner thing and he wanted me to inviteyou guys.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 So what's going on?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Nothing, um, it's just, um... It's Roger. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 I dunno, there's just something about...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Basically we just feel that he's...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 We hate that guy.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Yeah. Hate him.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 We're sorry, Pheebs, we're sorry.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. Okay. Okay, don't you think, maybe, though, it's just that he'sso perceptive that it freaks you out?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 ...No, we hate him.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 We're sorry.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Ma! What're you doing here?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 I came to give you this  and this.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Oww! Big ring!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 Why did you have to fill your father's head with all thatgarbage about making things right? Things were fine the way they were! There's chicken inthere, put it away. For God's sake, Joey, really. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Hold on, you-you knew?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 Of course I knew! What did you think? Your father is no JamesBond. You should've heard some of his cover stories. "I'm sleeping over at myaccountant's," I mean, what is that? Please!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 So then how could you I mean, how could you?!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 Do you remember how your father used to be? Always yelling,always yelling nothing made him happy, nothing made him happy, not that wood shop, notthose stupid little ships in the bottle, nothing. Now he's happy! I mean, it's nice, hehas a hobby.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Ma, I don't mean to be disrespectful, but... what the hell are you talkingabout?! I mean, what about you?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 Me? I'm fine. Look, honey, in an ideal world, there'd be no her,and your father would look like Sting. And I'll tell you something else. Ever since thatpoodle-stuffer came along, he's been so ashamed of himself that he's been more attentive,he's been more loving... I mean, it's like every day's our anniversary.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 I'm...happy...for you?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 Well don't be, because now everything's screwed up. I just wantit the way it was.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Ma, I'm sorry. I just did what I thought you'd want.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 I know you did, cookie. Oh, I know you did. So tell me. Did yousee her?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Yeah. You're ten times prettier than she is.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mrs. Tribbiani	 That's sweet. Could I take her?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 With this ring?  No contest.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 What's wrong, sweetie?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Nothing, nothing.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Aaaah, what's wrong, c'mon. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 It's, I mean, it's nothing, I'm fine. It's my friends. They-they have aliking problem with you. In that, um, they don't.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Oh. They don't.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 But they don't see all the wonderfulness that I see. They don't see allthe good stuff and all the sweet stuff. They just think you're a little...
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 What?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Intense and creepy. 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Oh.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 But I don't. Me, Phoebe.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Well, I'm not I'm not at all surprised they feel that way.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 You're not? See, that's why you're so great! 
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Roger	 Actually it's, it's quite, y'know, typical behaviour when you have thiskind of dysfunctional group dynamic. Y'know, this kind of co-dependant, emotionallystunted, sitting in your stupid coffee house with your stupid big cups which, I'm sorry,might as well have nipples on them, and you're like all 'Oh, define me! Define me! Loveme, I need love!'.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 So you talked to your dad, huh.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Yeah. He's gonna keep cheating on my ma like she wanted, she's gonna keeppretending she doesn't know even though she does, and my little sister Tina can't see herhusband any more because he got a restraining order...which has nothing to do withanything except that I found out today.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Wow.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 Things sure have changed here on Waltons mountain.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Ross	 So Joey, you okay?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Yeah, I guess. It's just parents, after a certain point, you gotta let go.Even if you know better, you've gotta let them make their own mistakes.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 Just think, in a couple of years we get to turn into them.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Chandler	 If I turn into my parents, I'll either be an alcoholic blond chasingafter twenty-year-old boys, or... I'll end up like my mom.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	  Hey.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Hey, Pheebs.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 How's it going?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, except I broke up with Roger.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Awww.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Yeah, right.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	All	 Aaawwwwww!!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Rachel	 What happened?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 I don't know, I mean, he's a good person, and he can be really sweet,and in some ways I think he is so right for me, it's just... I hate that guy!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Phoebe	 Hey, Joey. What's going on?
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Clear the tracks for the boobie payback express. Next stop: Rachel Green.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Joey!! What the hell were you doing?!
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Joey	 Sorry. Wrong boobies.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Monica	 Hello, Joey.
01	13	0113	The One With The Boobies	Mr. Tribbiani	 Oh! ...Hello, dear. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 I'm tellin' you Ross, she wants you.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Any contact?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 She lent me an egg once.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 You're in!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Aw, right.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Woman	 Hi, Ross.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Hey. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachelthing's not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbianI don't think we need a third... 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 An egg?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Yeah, you're gonna go up to her and say, "Here's your egg back, I'mreturning your egg."
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 I think it's winning.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 I think it's insane.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 She'll love it. Go with the egg, my friend.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Think it'll work?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 No, it's suicide. The man's got an egg.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 You can not do this.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Do what, do what?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 No! Phoebes! Don't you remember why you dumped the guy?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 'Cause he was creepy, and mean, and a little frightening... alright,still, it's nice to have a date on Valentine's Day!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 But Phoebe, you can go out with a creepy guy any night of the year. Iknow I do. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, uh, listen, about tonight...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 No, no, no, don't you dare bail on me. The only reason she's goin' outwith me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Yes, I know, but her friend sounds like such a...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Pathetic mess? I know, butcome on, man, she's needy, she'svulnerable. I'm thinkin', cha-ching!  Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You're doin'this.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Hi. She said yes.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Yes! Way to go, man!  Still got the egg, huh?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	  How do I look?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, uh, I... don't... care.  Ok, now, remember,no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Lorraine	 Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 ...And what did you bring?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Lorraine	 She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cab smell off myhands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Janice?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Oh.... my.... God.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	  Hey, it's Janice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Ok, I'm makin' a break for it, I'm goin' out the window. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 No, no, no, don't! I've been waitin' for like, forever to go out withLorraine. Just calm down. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I've dumpedtwice in the last five months!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	  Can you stop yellin'? You're makin' me nervous, and Ican't go when I'm nervous.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, you're right.  Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Ok, ok, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Which one was Pete Carney?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Pete the Weeper? Remember that guy who used to cry every time we hadsex.  "Was it good for you?"
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Yeah, well, I'll take a little crying any day overHoward-the-"I-win"-guy.  "I win! I win!" I went out withthe guy for two monthsI didn't get to win once.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 How did we end up with these jerks? We're good people!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 I don't know. Maybe we're some kinda magnets.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 I know I am. That's why I can't wear a digital watch.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 There's more beer, right?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if youwant to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It's Valentine's Day.It's perfect.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Ok, well, what kind of ritual?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Ok. We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Or?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Or...or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Burning's good.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Burning's good. Yeah, I got stuff to burn.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Lorraine	 You know, ever since I was little, I've been able to pick up quarterswith my toes.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Good for you.  Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 By the way, Chandler. I cut you out of all my pictures. So if you want,I have a bag with just your heads.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 That's OK.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Oh, are you sure? Really? Because you know, you could make littlepuppets out of them, and you could use them in your theater of cruelty.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	  We can't do that.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	  What? What can't you do?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 Uh, we might be leaving now.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Tell me it's "you and me" we.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I'mnot even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Ok, you can not do this to me.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 You're right, I'm sorry. You're right.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Lorraine	  Uh, can we have three chocolate mousses to go please?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 I'm outta here. Here's my credit card. Dinner's on me. I'm sorry,Chandler.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 I hope she throws up on you.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 So...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Just us.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, what a crappy night!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Although, I have enjoyed the fact that, uh your shirt's been stickin'outta your zipper ever since you came back from the bathroom. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Excuse me.  How ya doin'?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 So, do we have the best friends or what?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Joey's not a friend. He's...a stupid man who left us his credit card.Another drink? Some dessert? A big screen TV?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 I will go for that drink.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 You got it. Good woman!  Could weget a bottle of your most overpriced champagne?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Each.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 That's right, each. Oh, and a uh Rob Roy.  I've alwayswanted to know...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Happy Valentine's Day!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Oh, I miss you already. Can you believe this happened?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 No... no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Kiss me!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Oh, Chandler, sorry.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Hi, Monica.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Ok, well, this was very special.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Rach, come see who's out here!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Oh my god. Janice, hi!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Janice is gonna go away now.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 I'll be right back.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Oh, Joey, look who it is.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	  Whoa.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, good, Joey's home now.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 This is so fun. This is like a reunion in the hall.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There's someone I want you to say hi to.  He just happened to call.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Hi, Ross. Yes, it's me. How did you know?  
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 I'm just sayin' if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the wholeum, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to LosAngeles, he doesn't just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Kristin	 That's funny. Who are they?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her... close,personal friend.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Kristin	 You mean they're lovers.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 If you wanna put a label on it.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Kristin	 Wow, uh, anything else I should know?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Nope, nope, that's it. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Oh, and she's pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part.  Helloo!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Ok, so now we need, um sage branches and the sacramental wine.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 All I have is, is oregano and a Fresca.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Um, that's ok!  Ok. All right. Now we need the semenof a righteous man.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn't be doing theritual in the first place.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Can we just start throwing things in?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Ok, yeah, ok.  Oh, OK.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	  Ok, Barry's letters. Adam Ritter's boxershorts.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 Ok, and I have the, uh receipt for my dinner with Nokululu Oon Ah Ah.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Look, here's a picture of Scotty Jared naked.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	  Hey he's wearing a sweater.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 No.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel, Phoebe	 Eww!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 And here we have the last of Paulo's grappa.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 Hey, Rachel, isn't that stuff almost pure...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 How can I dump this woman on Valentine's day?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	 I don't know. You dumped her on New Year's.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, man. In my next life, I'm coming back as a toilet brush.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Hello, funny Valentine.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Hi, Just Janice.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, andI'm gonna!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Joey	  If you don't do it, I will.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 So, um, what do you do for a living?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Kristin	 Well, um, for the past few years I've been working.....which is funny because, that wasn't even my major.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Oh no. I thought you said they could shoot the spot without you. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Susan	 I thought they could...I'll try to get back as soon as I can. I'm sorry.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Now that is funny. Hey, do you think...would it be too weird if I invitedCarol over to join us? 'Cause she's, she's alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Kristin	  I guess.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Oh, no no no. I'm fine. I'm fine.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Come on. These people'll scooch down. You guys'll scooch, won't you? Let'stry scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin.Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin......does something that,funnily enough, wasn't even her major!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 1	 What do we got there?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 2	 A piece of something: boxer shorts, greeting cards, and whatlooks like a half-charred pictureWow, that guy's hairier than the Chief!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 You know, it's a really funny story how this happened.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 3	 It's all right. It's all right. You don't have to explain. Thisisn't the first boyfriend bonfire that we've seen get out of control.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 1	 You're our third call tonight.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Really?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 2	 Oh, sure, Valentine's is our busiest night of the year.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 I brought you something.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Is it loaded? Oh, little candy hearts.  Chan andJan Forever.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 I had them made special.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there's no way for me to tellyou this. At least there's no new way for me to tell you this. I just don't thingsare gonna work out.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 That's fine.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	  It is?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Mmm-hmm. Because I know that this isn't the end.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh no, you see, actually it is.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 No, it isn't, because you won't let that happen. Don't you know it yet?You love me, Chandler Bing.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Oh, no I don't.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 Well then ask yourself this. Why do you think we keep ending uptogether? New Year's? Who invited who? Valentine's? Who asked who into whose bed? 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 I did, but...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Janice	 You seek me out. Something deep in your soul calls out to me like afoghorn. Janice, Janice. You want me. You need me. You can't live without me. And you knowit. You just don't know you know it. See ya.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Chandler	 Call me!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 It's not true. I never called your mother a wolverine.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 You did so. I swear, I swear How longhas she been in the bathroom?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Uh, I don't think she's in the bathroom. Her coat is gone.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Well maybe it's cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I hadin 9 years. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 That could be it.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 Oh, god.  You know, this is stillpretty hot. 
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Mushroom. Smile. They won't all be like this. Some women might even staythrough dinner. Sorry, that's not funny
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 No, it's just...you know the whole "getting on with your life"thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I'm sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, andshe's perfectly nice, and, but that there's, that's it. And um, and then I'm here talkin'to you, and, and it's easy, and it's fun, and, and I don't, I don't have to...You know,here's a wacky thought. Um, what's say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I knowwhat you're gonna say, you're a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside fornow you know? Let's just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we're great together, you know.You can't deny it. Besides, you're carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see,you know, you keep sayin' that, but there's somethin' right here. I love you.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Oh, I love you too. But...
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 No but, no but.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 You know that thing you put over here with the pin in it? It's time totake the pin out. You'll find someone, I know you will. The right woman is just waitingfor you.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Ross	 That's easy for you to say, you found one already.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 All you need is a woman who likes men and you'll be set.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Carol	 Not her.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 3	 We get off around midnight, why don't we pick you up then?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 So, um, will you bring the truck?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 3	 I'll even let you ring the bell.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Oh, my god.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Phoebe	 See, there you go, the cleansing works!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Monica	 They're nice guys.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Rachel	 Oh, they're firemen guys.
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 1	 You guys tell them you were married?
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 2	 No way!
01	14	0114	The One With The Candy Hearts	Fireman No. 3	 Are you kidding? My girlfriend doesn't know, I'm not gonna tellthem!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Coffee. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Thank you.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Cappuccino.  
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Grazie.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 And a nice hot cider for Monica. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Aww, thank you.  Uh Rach?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Yeah?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Why does my cinamon stick have an eraser?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Oh! That's why.  I'm sorry!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Woman	 Chandler.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Mrs. Tedlock. You're looking lovely today. And may I say, that is a veryflattering sleeve length on you.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Mrs. Tedlock	 Yes. Well, Mr. Kostelick wants you to stop by his office at theend of the day.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Oh, listen. If this is about those prank memos, I had nothing to dowith them. Really. Nothing at all. Really.  Nothing.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Hey you guys! Chandler's coming and he says he has, like, thisincredible news, so when he gets here, we could all act like, you know...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Hey!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	All	 Hey!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Never mind. But it was going to be really good.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 What's going on?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	All	 What is it?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 So, it's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers, and big Alcalls me into his office and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	All	 That's great!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 So.... I quit.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	All	 Why?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Why? This was supposed to be a temp job!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Yeah, Chandler... you've been there for five years.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 If I took this promotion, it'd be like admitting that this is what Iactually do.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 So was it a lot more money?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 It doesn't matter. I just don't want to be one of those guys that's inhis office until twelve o'clock at night worrying about the WENUS.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 ... the WENUS?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Weekly Estimated Net Usage Systems. A processing term.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Oh. That WENUS.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 So what're you going to do?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know what I want to do. I justknow I'm not going to figure it out working there.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Oooh! I have something you can do! I have this new massage client...Steve?  Anyway, he's opening up a restaurant and he's looking for a head chef.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  Um... hi there.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Hi!  Oh, yeah, no, I know.You're a chef. I know, and I thought of you first, but um, Chandler's the one who needs ajob right now, so....
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Yeah... I just don't have that much cheffing experience. Unless it'san all-toast restaurant.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  Yeah, yeah! 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Well, what kind of food is he looking for?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Well, he wants to do some ecclectic, so he's looking for someone whocan, you know, create the entire menu.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  Oh my God!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know!  So, what do you think?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Thanks, Phoebe. But I just don't really see myself in a big white hat.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 OK.  Oh Monica! Guess what!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Can you see my nipples through this shirt?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 No. But don't worry, I'm sure they're still there.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Where are you going, Mr. Suity-Man?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Well, I have an appointment to see Dr. Robert Pillman, careercounselor a-gogo.  I added the "a-gogo."
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Career counselor?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Hey, you guys all know what you want to do.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 I don't!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do.You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don't have a dream.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Ah, the lesser-known "I don't have a dream" speech.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Oh, I love my life, I love my life!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Ooh! Brian's Song!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 The meeting with the guy went great?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 So great! He showed me where the restaurant's going to be. It's this,it's this cute little place on 10th Street. Not too big, not too small. Just right.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Was it formerly owned by a blonde woman and some bears?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 So anyway, I'm cooking dinner for him Monday night. You know, kind oflike an audition. And Phoebe, he really wants you to be here, which will be great for mebecause then you can 'ooh' and 'ahh' and make yummy noises.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 What are you going to make?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  Yummy noises.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  And Monica, what are you going to make?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 I don't know. I don't know. It's just going to be so great!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Ooh! I know what you could make!  I know! Oh, you should definitely make that thing... you know, with thestuff?  You know, that thing... with the stuff...? OK, I don't know.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Hey guys, does anybody know a good date place in the neighborhood?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 How about Tony's? If you can finish a 32-ounce steak, it's free.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 OK, ahem, hey, does anybody know a good place if you're not dating a puma?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Who are you going out with?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Oh, is this the bug lady?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Bzzzz.... I love you, Ross.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Her name is Celia. She's not a bug lady. She's curator of insects at themuseum.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 So what are you guys going to do?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Oh, I just thought we could go out to dinner, and then maybe bring herback to my place and I'd introduce her to my monkey.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 And he's not speaking metaphorically.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  So.... back to your place...you thinking, maybe... huh-huh?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Well, I don't know....  huh-huh.... but I'm hoping huh-huh.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 I'm telling you, that monkey is a chick magnet! She's going to take onelook at his furry, cute little face and it'll seal the deal.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Celia, don't worry!  Don't scream!  He's not going to hurt you!Soothing tones, Celia. Soothing tones! Marcel...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 I can't stand this! He's got his claws in my...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Alright... 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  OK, try this salmon mousse.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  Mmmm. Good.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Is it better than the other salmon mousse?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 It's creamier.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Yeah, well, is that better?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 I don't know. We're talking about whipped fish, Monica. I'm just happy I'mkeeping it down, y'know?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 My God! What happened to you?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Eight and a half hours of aptitude tests, intelligence tests,personality tests... and what do I learn?  "Youare ideally suited for a career in data processing for a large multinationalcorporation."
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 That's so great! 'Cause you already know how to do that!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Can you believe it? I mean, don't I seem like somebody who should bedoing something really cool? You know, I just always pictured myself doingsomething...something.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Oh Chandler, I know, I know... oh,hey! You can see your nipples through this shirt!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  Here you go, maybe this'llcheer you up.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Ooh, you know, I had a grape about five hours ago, so I'd better splitthis with you.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 It's supposed to be that small. It's a pre-appetizer. The French call itan amouz-bouche. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	  Well.... it is amouz-ing...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  Hello?  Oh, hi Wendy!  Yeah, eight o'clock. What did we say? Ten dollars an hour?...  OK, great.  Allright, I'll see you then. Bye. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Ten dollars an hour for what?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Oh, I asked one of the waitresses at work if she'd help me out.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	  Waitressing?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Uh-oh.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Well... of course I thought of you! But... but...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 But, but?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 But, you see, it's just... this night has to go just perfect, you know?And, well, Wendy's more of a... professional waitress.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Oh! I see. And I've sort of been maintaining my amateur status so that Ican waitress in the Olympics.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 You know, I don't mean to brag, but I waited tables at Innsbruck in'76.  Amouz-bouche? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 Talk to me.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 OK.... um, a weird thing happened to me on the train this morning...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 No no no. Talk... dirty.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	  Wha... what, here?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 Yes...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Ah....
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 Say something..... hot.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	  Er.... um..... 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Celia	 What?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Um... uh.... vulva.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  Vulva?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Alright, I panicked, alright? She took me by surprise. You know, but itwasn't a total loss. I mean, we ended up cuddling.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  Whoaa!! You cuddled? How many times??
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Shut up! It was nice. I just... I don't think I'm the dirty-talking kindof guy, you know?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 What's the big deal? You just say what you want to do to her. Or what youwant her to do to you. Or what you think other people might be doing to each other. I'lltell you what. Just try something on me.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	  Please be kidding.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Why not? Come on! Just, just close your eyes and tell me what you'd liketo be doing right now.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 OK.  I'm in my apartment...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 ....yeah... what else?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 That's it. I'm in my apartment, you're not there, we're not having thisconversation. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  Alright, look, I'll start, OK?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Joey, please.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Come on. Come on. Alright, ready, look!  Oh... Ross....you get me so hot. I want your lips on me now.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	  Wow.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Alright, now you say something.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 I... ahem... I really don't think so.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Come on! You like this woman, right?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Yeah.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 You want to see her again, right?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Sure.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Well if you can't talk dirty to me, how're you going to talk dirty to her?Now tell me you want to caress my butt!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 OK, turn around.  I just don't want you staring atme when I'm doing this.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  Alright, alright. I'm around. Go ahead.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Ahem... I want.... OK, I want to... feel your... hot, soft skin with mylips.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 There you go! Keep going. Keep going!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 I, er...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 I want to take my tongue... and... 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 ....and....
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Say it... say it!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 ...run it all over your body until you're... trembling with... with...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 ....with??
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	  Funny story!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 You're not going to believe this!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 It's OK. It's OK. I was always rooting for you two kids to gettogether.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Hey Chandler, while you were sleeping that guy from your old job calledagain.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Again?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 And again, and again, and again...  Hello?  And again.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	  Hey Mr. Kostelic! How's life on the fifteenth floor? Yeah, I miss you too.  Yeah, it's a lot less satisfying to steal pensfrom your own home, you know?  Well, that's very generous  er, but look,this isn't about the money. I need something that's more than a job. I need something Ican really care about....  And that's on top of the yearly bonus structure youmentioned earlier?  Look, Al, Al... I'm not playing hardball here, OK? This isnot a negotiation, this is a rejection!  No! No! No, stop saying numbers! I'mtelling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy!  I'll see you onMonday! 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Well?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  Wow! It's huge! It's so much bigger than the cubicle. Oh, thisis a cube.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Look at this! 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Oh! You have a window!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Yes indeedy!  With a beautiful view of...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Oh look! That guy's peeing!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	  OK, that's enough of the view. Check thisout, look at this. Sit down, sit down.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  OK.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 This is great!  Helen, could youcome in here for a moment? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Thank you Helen, that'll be all.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	 Last time I do that, I promise.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  Wendy, we had a deal!  Yeah, you promised!Wendy! Wendy! Wendy! 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Who was that?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Wendy bailed. I have no waitress.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Oh... that's too bad. Bye bye. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Ten dollars an hour.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 No.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Twelve dollars an hour.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Mon. I wish I could, but I've made plans to walk around.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 You know, Rachel, when you ran out of your wedding, I was there for you.I put a roof over your head, and if that means nothing to you...  twenty dollars an hour.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Done.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Well hello! Welcome to Monica's. May I take your coat?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Hi Steve!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Hello, Monica.  Hello, greeter girl.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  This is Rachel.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  Yeah, OK.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  Mmmmmm! Everything smells so delicious! You know, Ican't remember a time I smelt such a delicious combination of of, OK, smells.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 It's a lovely apartment.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Oh, thank you. Would you like a tour?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 I was just being polite, but, alright. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 What's up?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	  In the cab, on the way over, Steve blazed up a doobie.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 What?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Smoked a joint? You know, lit a bone? Weed? Hemp? Ganja?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 OK, OK. I'm with you, Cheech. OK.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  Is it dry in here? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Let me, let me get you some wine!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Yeah, I think we're ready for our first course.  OK, um, these are rot-shrimp ravioli, and celantro pondou sauce...... with just a touch of mints... and... ... ginger.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Well, smack my ass and call me Judy! These are fantastic!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 I'm so glad you liked them!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Like 'em? I could eat a hundred of them!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Oh, well... um, that's all there are of these. But in about eight and ahalf minutes, we'll be serving some delicious onion tartlets.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Tartlets. Tartlets. Tartlets. The word has lost all meaning. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Excuse me? Can I help you with anything?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 You know, I don't know what I'm looking for. 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  Ah, cool! Taco shells!  You know, these are... they're like a little corn envelope.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  You know that? You don't wantto spoil your appetite.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  Hey! Sugar-O's! 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 You know, if you just wait another... six and a half minutes...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Macaroni and cheese! We gotta make this!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 No, we don't.  
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Oh, OK.  Oh, sorry.  
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Why don't you just have a seat here?  OK... give me the Gummi-bears.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  No.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Give them to me.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Alright, we'll share.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 No, give me the...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Well then you can't have any.  Bear overboard!I think he's drowning.  Hey fellows! Grab ona Sugar-O... save yourself!  "Help!  I'm drowning!  Help!"
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	  That's it! Dinner is over!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 What?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 What?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Why?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 Why? It's just that I've waited seven years for an opportunity likethis, and you can't even wait four and a half minutes for a stupid onion tartlet?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	  Hey!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 What a tool!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 You don't want to work for a guy like that.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Yeah!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Monica	 I know... it's just... I thought this was, you know... it.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Look, you'll get there. You're an amazing chef.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Yeah! You know all those yummy noises? I wasn't faking.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	  So, er... how did it go with Celia?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Oh, I was unbelievable.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 All right, Ross!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 I was the James Michener of dirty talk. It was the most elaborate filthyou have ever heard. I mean, there were characters, plot lines, themes, a motif...at one point there were villagers.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Whoa! And the...  huh-huh?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Well, ahem... you know, by the time we'd finished with all the dirty talk,it was kinda late... and we were both kind of exhausted, so uh...
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 You cuddled.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Ross	 Yeah, which was nice.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 You guys wanna try and catch a late movie or something?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Rachel	 Maybe, but shouldn't we wait for Chandler?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Joey	 Yeah, where the hell is he?
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Chandler	  Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at theWENUS and I'm not happy!...  Oh, really, really, really? Well, let me tell yousomething... you will care about it, because I care about it! You got it? Good!  Whooooaaaa....
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 How's this? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Eeeee!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 Sorry. How about over here? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Aaaaah!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 See, that just means it's working. Does this hurt? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 No.
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 What about this? 
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Steve	 Aaaaahhh!!
01	15	0115	The One With The Stoned Guy	Phoebe	 There you go! 
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 This is unbelievable. Its been like a half an hour. If this was acartoon, youd be looking like a ham right about now.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Theres the waitress. Excuse me, Miss. Hello, Miss?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Its Phoebe! Hi!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	 Hi. Okay, will that be all?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Wait, wait! Wh-what are you doing here?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	 Yeah, um, I was over there, then you said, "Excuse me, helloMiss," so now Im here.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 No, no... how come you are working here?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	 Right, yeah, cause its close to where I live, and the aprons arereally cute.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Can we start over?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	 Yeah. Okay great. Im gonna be over here. 
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler, Joey	 No, no, no!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 I dont know whether hes testing me, or just acting out, but mymonkey is out of control. But, he keeps erasing the messages on my machine,"supposedly" by accident.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 No, yeah, Ive done that.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 And then, like three days in a row he got to the newspaper before I did, andpeed all over the crossword.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Ive never done that.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 All right, now look at her and tell me she doesnt look exactly likeher sister.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Im sayin I see a difference.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Theyre twins!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 I dont care. Phoebes Phoebe. Ursulas... hot!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 You know that thing, when you and I talk to each other about things?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Yeah.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Lets not do that any more.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	All	 Hey guys! Hey!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Hey Pheebs, guess who we saw today.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Ooh, ooh, fun! Okay... um, Liam Neeson.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Nope.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Morly Safer.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Nope.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 The woman who cuts my hair!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Okay, look, this could be a really long game.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Your sister Ursula.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	  Oh, really.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah, she works over at that place, uh...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Rifts. Yeah, I know.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, you do? Because she said you guys havent talked in like years.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Hmmm? Yeah. So, um, is she fat?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Not from where I was standin.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	  where were you standing?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Um, Pheebs, so, you guys just dont get along?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Its mostly just dumb sister stuff, you know, I mean, like, everyonealways thought of her as the pretty one, you know... Oh, oh, she was the first one tostart walking, even though I did it... later that same day. But, to my parents, by then itwas like "yeah, right, well what else is new?"
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Oh, Pheebs, Im sorry, Ive got to go. Ive got Lamaze class.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, and Ive got Earth Science, but I'll catch you in Gym.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 So, is this just gonna be you and Carol?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 No, Susans gonna be there too. Weve got dads, weve gotlesbians, the whole parenting team.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Well, isnt, isnt that gonna be weird?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 No, no.  I mean, it mighta beenat first, but by now I, I think Im pretty comfortable with the whole situation.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Ross, thats my jacket.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 I know.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Woman	 Hi, were the Rostins. Err, Im J.C., and hes Michael, andwere having a boy, and a girl.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Good for you. Alrighty, next?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Hi, um, Im err,  Im Ross Geller, and errah...  ..thats, thats my boy in there, and uh, this is Carol Willick, and this... is Susan Bunch. Susan is um Carols,just, com...  ..whos next?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Im sorry, I didnt get... Susan is?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Susan is Carols, Carols, Carols, friend...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	 Life partner.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Like buddies.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Like lovers.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 You know how close women can get.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	 Susan and I live together.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Although I was married to her.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Carol, not me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Err, right.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	 Its a little complicated.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 A little.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 But were fine.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Absolutely.  So, twins... hah!Thats like two births.  Ouch.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 And  to you too, Helen.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Helen	  Nina Bookbinder is here to see you.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, okay. Send her in.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Hi.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Hi, Nina. Come on in.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 You wanted to see me?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Uh, Yes. Yes. Ive just been going over your data here, and littlething, youve been post-dating your Friday numbers.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Which is bad, because?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Well, it throws my WENUS out of whack.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Your... excuse me?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 WENUS.  Weekly Estimated Net...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Oh, Net Usage Statistics, right. Gotcha, gotcha. Wont happen again. Iwouldnt want to do anything to hurt your... "wenus."
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Its not just that shes cute, okay. Its just that...shes really really cute.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 It doesnt matter. You dont dip your pen in the company ink.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Ross, your little creatures got the remote again.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Marcel, Marcel, give Rossie the remote. Marcel. Marcel, you give Rossie theremote right now... Marce... you give Rossie the remote...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Great.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Relax, Ill fix it.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	  Cool... "Urkel" in Spanish is"Urkel."
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	  How did he do this?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	  So tell me something, is leaving theChristmas lights up part of your plan to keep us merry all year long?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Ah no, you see, someone was supposed to take them down around NewYears... but obviously someone forgot.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Well, someone was supposed to write "Rach, take down thelights" and put it on the re... frigerate...  How long has that been there?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Hey, where you been?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 I went back to Riffs. I think Ursula likes me. All I ordered wascoffee, she brought me a tuna meltt and fourplates of curly fries.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Score.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 She is so hot!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Yeah, listen. Okay, before you do anything Joey-like, you might wanna runit by err... 
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Pheebs?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	  Yeah?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 You think it would be okay if I asked out your sister?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Why? Why would you wanna... do that?  Why?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 So that if we went out on a date, shed be there.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Well, I mean, Im not my sisters, you know, whatever, and um...I mean, its true, we were one egg, once, but err, you know, weve grown apart,so, um... I dont know, why not? Okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Cool, thanks.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 You okay?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Yeah Im fine.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 You wanna watch Laverne y Shirley?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Sorry.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Hi. Sorry Im late. Wheres, wheres Carol?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Stuck at school. Some parent-teacher thing. You can go. Ill get theinformation.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 No... No... No. I think I should stay, I think we should both knowwhats going on.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Oh, good. Thisll be fun.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Alrighty. Were gonna start with some basic third stage breathingexercises, so Mummies, why dont you get on your back? And... coaches, you should besupporting Mummys head.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross, Susan	 What? What? What?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 I am supposed to be the mommy?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Okay, Im gonna play my sperm card one more time.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Look, I dont see why I should have to miss out on the coachingtraining just because Im a woman.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 I see. So what do you propose to do?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 I will flip you for it.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Flip me for it? No, no, no... heads, heads, heads!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	  On your back... Mom.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Alright, Mommies, take a nice deep cleansing breath.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Good. Now imagine your vagina is opening like a flower.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Mr. D, hows it going, sir?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Ohh, its been better. The Annual Net Usage Statistics are in.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 And?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Its pretty ugly. We havent seen an ANUS this bad since theseventies.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 So what does this mean?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Well, were gonna be layin off people in every department.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Hey, listen, I know I came in late last week, but I slept funny, and myhair was very very &ndash;
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Not you. Relax. Ever have to fire anyone?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Nina? Nina.  Nina.  Nina.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Are you okay?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	  Yes, yes I am. Err, listen, the reason that Icalled you in here today was, err... please dont hate me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	  What?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	  Would you like to have dinner sometime?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Well, what I really want is for my mom to be alive and enjoy it with me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Okay... Let me put it this way. Anything from Crabtree and Evelyn?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Ooh! Bath salts would be nice.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Ooh, okay... good.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 What is this place?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Look, youre cold, I have to pee, and... ..theres a cup of coffee on the window. How bad could it be?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 I think we have an answer.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Whats she doing here?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 This could be Gods way of telling us to eat at home.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Think she got fired at Riffs?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 No, no, no. We were there last night. She kept... ..bringing swordfish.  are you gonna go to the, um?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Im gonna wait till after we order. Its her, right.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 It looks like her.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 Um, excuse me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Yeah?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 Hi, its us.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	  Right, and its me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 So, so youre here too?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Much as you are.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	  Your turn.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Err... we know what we want.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	  Oh, thats good.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 All we want is two Caffe Lattes.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 And some biscottie cookies.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Good choice.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Jamie	 Definitely her.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Fran	 Yeah.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 I cant believe you. You still havent told that girl shedoesnt have a job yet?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Well, you still havent taken down the Christmas lights.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Congratulations, I think youve found the worlds thinnestargument.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Im just trying to find the right moment, you know?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Oh, well, that shouldnt be so hard, now that youre dating. "Sweetheart, youre fired, but how bout aquickie before I go to work?"
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Hey.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel, Chandler	 Hey.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 You know, once youre inside, you dont have to knock any more.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Ill get it.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Oh. Hi, Mr.Heckles.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr.Heckles	 Youre doing it again.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Were not doing anything. Were just sitting around talking,quietly.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr.Heckles	 I can hear you through the ceiling. My cats cant sleep.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 You dont even have cats.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr.Heckles	 I could have cats.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	  Goodbye Mr.Heckles.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Well try to keep it down.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Phoebe, could you do me a favour? Could you try this on? I just wanna makesure it fits.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Ooh, my first birthday present...  ..oh, this is really...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Oh, no no no. Its for Ursula. I just figured, you know, size-wise.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Ohhh... Sure, yeah... ..okay, it fits.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Are you seein her again tonight?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Yep. Ice Capades.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Wow, this is serious. Ive never known you to pay money for any kindof capade.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 I dont know. I like her, you know. Shes different. Theresuh, somethin about her.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 That you like,  we get it. You like her. Great!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Hey, Phoebe, I asked you, and you said it was okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Alright, well, maybe now its not okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Okay... Well maybe now Im not okay with it not being okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Knit, good woman, knit, knit!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 And thats the Chrysler Building right there.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Nina.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Mr.Douglas...  ..cool tie.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	  Shes still here.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Yes, yes she is. Didnt I memo you on this? See, after I let her go,err, I got a call from her psychiatrist, Dr. Flanen-nen, Dr. Flanen, Dr. Flan. 
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 And err, he informed me that uh, she took the news rather badly, in fact,he uh, mentioned the word frenzy.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Youre kidding? She seems so...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, no, no. Nina...  ..she iswhooo wewee-woo whoo whoo! In fact, if you asked her right now, she would have norecollection of being fired at all, none at all.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 Thats unbelievable.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 And yet, believable. So I decided not to fire her again until I can beassured that she will be no threat to herself, or others.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr. Douglas	 I see. I guess you never really know whats goin on insidea persons head.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Well, I guess thats why they call it psychology, sir.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Soothing Male Voice	 ..a sound Mom and Dad never forget. For this after all, is themiracle of birth.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Teacher	 Lights please? And thats having a baby. Next week is our finalclass.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Susan, go deep.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	 This is impossible. Its just impossible.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 What is, honey?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	 What that woman... did. I am not doin that. Its justgonna have to stay in, thats all, everything will be the same, itll just stay in.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Carol, honey, shhh, shhh, everythings gonna be alright.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Carol	  Oh, what do you know?  No one's going up to you andsaying, "Hi, is that your nostril?  Mind if we push this pot roastthrough it?"
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 Carol, Carol, sweetie. Cleansing breath.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 I know its frightening, but, big picture. The birth part is just oneday, and when its over, were all gonna be parents for the rest of our lives.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Susan	 I mean, thats what this is all about, right? Ross? Ross?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Im gonna be a father.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 This is just occurring to you?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 I always knew I was havin a baby, I just never realised the baby washaving me.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	  Oh, youre gonna be great!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 Aw, how can you say that? I cant even get Marcel to stop eating thebath mat. How am I gonna raise a kid?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 You know, Ross, some scientists are now saying that, that monkeys andbabies are actually different.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Wherere you going?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Out.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 With?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	  Yes.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Alright, could I just ask you one question?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Have you two, you know... like... you know... you know... yet?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 Well, not that its any of your business, but, no, we havent,okay?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Joey	 You meant sex, right?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Do you have a sec?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Ah, sure, Nina. Whats up?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 I dont know. For the past couple days, people have been avoidingme and giving me these really strange looks.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, well, ah... maybe thats because theyre ah... jealous, ofus.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Maybe. But that doesnt explain why they keep taking my scissors.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Ah, well, maybe thats, ah, because youre getting a big raise.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 I am?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Sure, why not?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 Oh my god!  Youre amazing!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Oh, you dont know.  Helen, could you make surewe put through the paperwork on Miss Bookbinders raise?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Helen	  So you still want me to send her psychological profileto Personnel?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Nina	 What?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Helen drinks.  Will you marry me?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Well, I ended up telling her everything.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Oh, howd she take it?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Pretty well. Except for the stapler thing. Little tip: if youre ever in a similar situation, never ever leave yourhand...  ..on the desk.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Okay, I think I get how to do this.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Alright, so, can we turn this off? Can we just make it... make them goaway? Because I cant, I cant watch.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	  okay, Pheebs, theyre gone.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Are you alright?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Yeah. Its just, you know, its this whole stupid Ursulathing, its...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Okay, Pheebs, can I ask? So, hes going out with her. I mean, is itreally so terrible?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Um, yeah. Look, I mean, Im not saying shes like evil oranything. She just, you know, shes always breaking my stuff. When I waseight, and I wouldnt let her have my Judy Jetson thermos, so she threw it under thebus. And then, oh, and then there was Randy Brown, who was like... Have you ever had aboyfriend who was like your best friend?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica, Rachel	  No.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Well, but thats what he was for me. And she you know, kind of stolehim away, and then... broke his heart... and then he wouldnt even talk to meany more. Because he said he didnt wanna be around... anything that lookedlike either one of us.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Oh... Oh, Pheebs.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 I mean, I know Joey is not my boyfriend, or my thermos, or anything, but...
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Chandler	 Youre not gonna lose him.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Hon, you gotta talk to Joey.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Yeah. Okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ross	 No, come on, he doesnt know this stuff. If he knew how you felt.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 But hes falling in love with her.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 Oh please, theyve been going out a week. They havent even slepttogether yet, I mean, thats not serious.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Okay... Okay.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, oh.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	  Oh.
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Ursula	 Yeah, um, may we help you?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Rachel, what are you doing? Its freezing out here. Would you comeback inside?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	 No no no no no. You wanted me to take them down, so...  ..Im takin em down. Okay? Whoa!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Monica	 Oh-my-god Rachel!  Rachel!
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Rachel	  Im okay! Im okay!  Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please?
01	16	0116	The One With The Two Parts, Part I	Mr.Heckles	 See, this is just the kind of thing I was talking about.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hi. Uh, my friend here was taking down our Christmas lights, and and shefell off the balcony and may have broken her foot or or ankle or something.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 My god. You still have your Christmas lights up?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 Fill this out and bring it back to me.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow. Ow ow ow.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Okay, ooh, alright. Name, address... Okay, in case of emergency, call?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 You.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Really?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Yeah.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Oh, that is so sweet.  Oh gosh, love you. Insurance?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, check it. Definitely, I want some of that.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  you don't have insurance?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Why, how much is this gonna cost?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 I have no idea, but X-rays alone could be a couple hundred dollars.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Wel-wel-well what are we gonna do?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Well there's not much we can do.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Um... unless, unless I use yours.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hah, no no no no no no no no no no.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  well, now, wait a second, who did I just put asmy "In case of emergency" person?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  That's insurance fraud.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Well, alright, then, forget it.  Might as well just gohome. Ow ow ow ow!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Okay, okay. I hate this.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Thank you. Thank you. I love you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Hi,  um, I'm gonna need a new set of  these forms .
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 Why?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  I am really an idiot.  you see, I was fillingout my friend's form, and instead of putting her information,  I put mine.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 You are an idiot. .
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  yep, that's me,  I am that stupid .
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 I had a dream last night where I was playing football with my kid.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler, Joey	 That's nice.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 No, no, with him.  I'mon this field, and they, they hike me the baby... and I, I know I've gotta dosomething 'cause the Tampa Bay defence is comin' right at me.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Tampa Bay's got a terrible team.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Right, but, it is just me and the baby, so I'm thinkin' they can take us.And so I uh, hah-hah, I just heave it down field.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 What are you crazy? That's a baby!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 He should take the sack?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Anyway, suddenly I'm down field, and I realise that I'm the onewho's supposed to catch him, right? Only I know there is no way I'm gonna get there intime, so I am running, and running, and that, that is when I woke up. See I, I am sonot ready to be a father.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Hey, you're gonna be fine. You're one of the most caring, mostresponsible men in North America. You're gonna make a great dad.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Yeah, Ross. You and the baby just need better blocking.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Oh, have either one of you guys ever been to the Rainbow Room? Is it realexpensive?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Well, only if you order stuff.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 I'm takin' Ursula tonight. It's her birthday.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Wo-wo-whoa. What about Phoebe's birthday?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 When's that?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Tonight.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Oh, man. What're the odds of that happening?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 You take your time.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 There it is! So what're you gonna do?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 What can I do? Look, I don't want to do anything to screw it up withUrsula.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 And your friend Phoebe?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Well, if she's my friend, hopefully she'll understand. I mean, wouldn'tyou guys?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Man, if you tried something like that on my birthday, you'd bestarin' at the business end of a hissy fit.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 ..you add a pinch of saffron, it makes all the difference.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Okay, errrr, Monica?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Yes?  ..yes, she is.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Hi, this is my friend Rachel.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hi.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	  Hi, err Rachel. I'm Dr.Mitchell.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	  And I'm his friend,Dr.Rosen.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 Excuse me?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 I meant er,  young, young, I meant young,young to be a doctor. Oh good, Rach.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Thank you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Right.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 ..so, he said it was just a sprain, and that was it.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Uh, you left out the stupid part.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Not stupid. The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrownight, and I said "yes."
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 I think it's totally insane, I mean, they work for the hospital. It'slike returning to the scene of the crime. You know, I say we blow off the dates.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 What? Monica, they are cute, they are doctors,  cute doctors, doctors who are cute!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Alright, what have we learned so far?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	The Whole Party	  SURPRISE!!!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 What the hell are you doing? You scared the crap outta me.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Was that the cake?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Yeah, yeah. I got a lemon schmush.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Come on, she'll be here any minute.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 I hope it's okay.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Oh...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	  "Happy Birthday Peehe."
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Well maybe we can make a, a, a 'B' out of one of those roses.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	  Yeah, we'll just use our special cake tools.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Hey, what's going on?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Oh, we just...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe'S Friends	  Surprise!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  oh, oh, oh! This is so great! Oh my god! This was not at allscary. Hi everybody. Hi Betty! Betty, Hi!  You found Betty! Oh my god!  This is great. Everybody I love is in the same room,  Where's Joey?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Did you see Betty?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 I tell you one thing, I wouldn't mind having a piece ofthis sun-dried tomato business. Five years ago, if somebody had said to me, here's atomato that looks like a prune, I'd say "get out of my office!"
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Dad, before I was born, did you freak out at all?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 I'm not freaking out, I'm just saying, if somebody hadcome to me with the idea andndash;
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Dad, dad, dad, I'm talkin' about the whole uh, baby thing. Did you uh,ever get this sort of... panicky, "Oh my god I'm gonna be a father" kind of athing?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 No. Your mother really did the work. I was busy with thebusiness. I wasn't around that much. Is that what this is about?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 No, no, Dad, I was just wondering.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 'Cause there's time to make up for that. We can do stufftogether. You always wanted to go to that Colonial Williamsburg. How 'bout we do that?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Thanks, Dad, really, I ju... you know, I just, I just needed to know,um... when did you start to feel like a father?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 Oh, well, I, I guess it musta been the day after you wereborn. We were in the hospital room, your mother was asleep, and they brought you in andgave you to me. You were this ugly little red thing, and all of a sudden you grabbed myfinger with your whole fist. And you squeezed it, so tight. And that's when I knew.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 So you don't wanna go to Williamsburg?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 No, we can go to Williamsburg.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Mr. Geller	 Eat your fish.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Rachel, the cute doctors are here.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Okay, coming!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hi, come on in.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Hey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hi, Geoffrey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Hi.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 Ah here, we brought wine.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Look at this, it's from the cellars of Ernest and Tova Borgnine,so how could we resist?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Oh, that's great. Look at that.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 So, Monica, how's the ankle?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 It's uh...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 ..well, why don't you tell them? After all it, isyour ankle.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you, um...Well, listen, why don't you two sit down and, and we'll get you some glasses... okay... STAT!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Okay, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we reallyare? I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 It will not be fine. We'll get in trouble.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Oh, Monica! Would you stop being such a wuss?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 A wuss? Excuse me for living in the real world, okay?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 So?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 So... they sss-still seem normal.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 That's because they are.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	  okay, but you have to admit that every time we go out...Women we meet at the hospital... It turns into...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Willya relax? Look around. No pagan altars, no piles of bones inthe corners, they're fine.  Go like this.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 I said we are not going to do it, okay? Sometimes you can be such a, abig baby.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  I am not a baby! You know what? I swear togod, just because you get so uptight every time we...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Sure, every time, you're such a princess...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 You know what?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 What?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 You know what?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 What!?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 You know what?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  What!!?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Hello! Here we go!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 This is a great place. How long have you lived here?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Thanks! I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved ina few months ago.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Yeah...  ..see, I was supposed to getmarried, but, um, I left the guy at the altar.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Really?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Yeah... Yeah, I know it's pretty selfish, but haha, hey,that's me.  Why don't you try the hummus?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 So, Monica, what do you do?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Aahh, I'm a... chef at a restaurant uptown.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 Good for you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Yeah it is, mostly because I get to boss peoplearound, which I just love to do.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Rosen	 This hummus is great.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 God bless the chickpea.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	   Oh, god, I am so spoiled... That's it!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, Iwas a cow?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  I used to wet my bed.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  I use my breasts to get other people's attention.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	   We bothdo that!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	  Monica and Rachel's apartment. Err yeh, aayah, yeh,just one second...  ..ah, Rachel, it's your dad.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Hi, Dad. No, no, it's me.  li-listen, Dad, I can't talk right now, um, but there's something, um...there's something that I've been meaning to tell you...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Would you excuse me for a second?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Remember back in freshman year?  Well, Billy Dreskin and I had sex on your bed.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Daddy... Daddy... Daddy, why whyyy would I sleep with BillyDreskin? His father tried to put you out of business! ...dead!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Ross, he's got the remote again.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Good. Maybe he can switch it back.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Maybe not.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Hello?  Um, yeah, uh,  Okay ah, hold on a second, lemme lemme justcheck and see if see if she's here.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 It's the woman from the hospital admissions office. She says there's aproblem with the form. Oh, god, oh god...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel, Monica	 Oh god, waddawe do, waddawe do, waddawe do?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 I don't know! Why don't you just explain? What do they want? Find outwhat they want!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Okay  no, you do it.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Hello, this is Monica... Yeah??? Oh...  Okay, yes, we'll be right, we'll be right down. Thankyou. 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 What?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 We forgot to sign one of the admissions forms.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Ohhh...  Okay, you were right. You were right! Thiswas just not worth it.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Thank you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Okay, let me just change.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Yes.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	  Hey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross, Chandler	 Hey!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Hi.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Trouble?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Your sister stood me up the other night.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Oh, no. Don't you hate it when people aren't there foryou?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Well did you try calling her?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 I've been trying for two days. When I called the restaurant, they said shewas too busy to talk. I can't believe she's blowin' me off.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Hey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Oh!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Um you, you got a minute?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Um, yeah, I'm just...  ..working.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 So.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Uh-huh.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Um, oh, I got you a birthday present.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Oh, wow! You remembered!  Oh! It's a Judy Jetson thermos!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Right, like the kind you...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Right... Oh, I got something for you, too.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 How'd you know I was coming?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Um, yeah, um, twin thing.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 I can't believe you did this.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 I can't believe you...  ..did this.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 So... What's the deal with umm, you and Joey?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Oh, right. He is so great. But that's over.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Does he know?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Who?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Joey. You know, um, he's really nutsy about you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 He is? Why?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 You got me.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Right.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Excuse me. Doesn't this come with a side salad?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 So, um, are you gonna call him?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 What?  Do you think he likes me?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 No, Joey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 Oh. No, no, he is so smart. He'll figure it out.  Do you want some chicken?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 No. No food with a face.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ursula	 You have not changed!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Yeah, you too.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Hi, remember us?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	  Mmm hmmm.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Um, okay. You just called a little while ago about needing asignature on the admissions form. Well, it turns out we need a whole new one because uh, you see, I-I, I put the wrong name again.  'causeum...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 You're that stupid.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  I am. I'm that stupid. 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Yeah, and and, I'm just gonna pay for this with a check.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 Well, you know your insurance will cover that.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Yeah, I know...  ..I'm I'm just notthat bright either.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Okay, worst case scenario. Say you never feel like a father.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Uh-huh.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Say your son never feels connected to you, as one. Say all of hisrelationships are affected by this.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Do you have a point?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 You know, you think I would.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 What's up with the simian?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 It's just a fur ball.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Okay...  ..whose turn is it?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Yours, I just got 43 points for 'KIDNEY'.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 No, no, you got zero points for 'IDNEY'.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 I had a 'K'. Where's where's my 'K'?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 You've got to help me my monkey swallowed a 'K'!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	  You go get that animal outta here.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 No, no you don't understand the animal hospital is way across town he'schoking I don't know what else to do.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 What's goin' on?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Marcel swallowed a Scrabble tile.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 Oh.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Nurse	 Excuse me... This hospital is for people!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Lady, he is people. He has a name, okay? He watches Jeopardy!He he touches himself when nobody's watching. Please, please have a heart!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 I'll take a look at him.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel, Monica	 Oh, thank you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Michael.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Dr. Mitchell	 Rachel.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 What?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Monica.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Oh.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	  Hi.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	  Hi.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  Hey.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Urse...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 ..ah, what're you doing here? I've been trying to call you.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  Listen, um...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 No, no, no, don't say "listen." I know that "listen."I've said that "listen."
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  I'm sorry.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 I don't get it. What happened? What about everything you said under thebridge?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 : Yeah, um...  You know you, youshould just forget about what I said under the bridge, I was talkin' crazy thatnight, I was so drunk!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 You don't drink.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  That's right, I don't... But I was, I was drunk on you!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Oh, Urse... 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  Okay, yeah, so it's not gonna work.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Why? Is it because I'm friends with Phoebe?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  If it was, would you stop hanging out with her?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	  no. No, I, I couldn't do that.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  Um, then yes, it's 'cause of Phoebe! So, you know, it'seither her or me.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Then, uh, then I'm sorry.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  You know... You're gonna be really, really hard to get over.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 I know...
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 I don't know whether it's just 'cause we're breakin' up or... what, butyou have never looked so beautiful.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Really?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 Pheebs?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	  Yeah. Oooh... 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 He looks so tiny.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 We just got the message.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Phoebe	 Is he alright?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Yeah. The doctor got the 'K' out. He also found an 'M' and an 'O'.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 We think he was trying to spell out 'MONKEY.'
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Well, the doctor says he's gonna be fine, he's just sleeping now.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	  So, you feel like a dad yet?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 No, why?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 Hey, come on, you came through, you did what you had to do. That isvery dad.
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Oh, look, he's waking up!
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	  hey, fella! How you doing?
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 Aqui está. 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 ¿A quién pidio el pollo General Tso? 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Chandler	 ¡Pudo aver sido General Tso! 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Rachel	 ¡Mira, mira, el viejo desnudo está haciendo el hula hoop! 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	All	¡Ewww! 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	All	 ¡Hola, Joey! 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Joey	 ¡Hola, amigos! 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Monica	 Mira, Ross, Marcel se llevo el control remoto. 
01	17	0117	The One With The Two Parts, Part II	Ross	 ¡Lo que sucedio es que no le gusta la tele! 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uh, Rach, we're running low on resumes over here.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Do you really want a job with Popular Mechanics?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Well, if you're gonna work for mechanics, those are the ones to workfor.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Hey, look, you guys, I'm going for anything here, OK? I cannot be awaitress anymore, I mean it. I'm sick of the lousy tips, I'm sick of being called 'Excuseme...'
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Rach, did you proofread these?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Uh... yeah, why?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uh, nothing, I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent compuperskills.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Oh my Goood! Oh, do you think it's on all of them?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Oh no, I'm sure the Xerox machine caught a few.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Hey, guys.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler, Ross	 Hey.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Hey... hi, ladies... uh, can I get you anything? :Did you bring the mail?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Lots of responses.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : Really? : Sure, we have scones left! :OK, read them to me.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 : Dear Ms. Green, thank you for your inquiry, however... oh...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : We have apple cinnamon...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 : OK... Dear Ms. Green... yeah... yeah... yeah... No. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Wow!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 : Your Visa bill is huge!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Give me that!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 You know, I can't believe you. Linda is so great! Why won't you go outwith her again?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I don't know.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Is this still about her whole 'The Flintstones could've reallyhappened' thing?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No, it's not just that. It's justI want someone who... who doessomething for me, y'know? Who gets my heart pounding, who... who makes me, uh... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 ...little playthings with yarn?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Could you want her more?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Who?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	  Dee, the sarcastic sister from Whats Happening.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Look, I am totally, totally over her, OK, I just... : Hiiii!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Hi! How are you?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 We're fine, we're fine.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 OK.  
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Shut up!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 We're notwe're not saying anything.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uhhhh... Joey cried last night.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Thank you.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	  We were playing poker, alright...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 There was chocolate on the three. It looked like an eight, alright?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Oh, guys, you should've seen him. 'Read 'em and weep.'
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 And then he did.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Well, now, how come you guys have never played poker with us?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Yeah, what is that? Like, some kind of guy thing? Like, some kind ofsexist guy thing? Like it's poker, so only guys can play?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No, women are welcome to play.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Oh, OK, so then what is it? Some kind of... you know, like, like... somekind of, y'know, like... alright, what is it?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 There just don't happen to be any women in our games.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Yeah, we just don't happen to know any women that know how to play poker.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Girls	 Oh, yeah, right.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Oh, please, that is such a lame excuse!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Really.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 I mean, that's a typical guy response.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Excuse me, do any of you know how to play?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Girls	 No.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 But you could teach us.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Guys	 No.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	  OK, so now we draw cards.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 So I wouldn't need any, right? Cause I have a straight.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh, good for you!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Congratulations!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 OK Phoebs, how many do you want?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 OK, I just need two... the, um, ten of spades and the six of clubs.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No. No, uh, Phoebs? You can'tyou can't do...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh wait, I have the ten of spades! Here! 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No, no. Uh... no, see, uh, you-you can't do that.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no, that's OK, I don't need them. I'm going forfours.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Oh, you're... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Alright, here we go. We've got salmon roulettes and assorted crudites.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe, Rachel	 OOooooo!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Whoa, whoa, whoa, Monica, what're you doin'? This is a poker game. Youcan't serve food with more than one syllable. It's gotta be like chips, or dip, orpretz...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	  OK, so at this point, the dealer...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Alright, you know, we got it, we got it. Let's play for real. Highstakes... big bucks...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Alright, now, you sure? Phoebe just threw away two jacks because theydidn't look happy...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 But... I'm ready, so, just deal.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 OK, alright, last minute lesson, last minute lesson.  Joey... three... eight. Eight... three.  Alright babe, deal thecards.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	  Dammit, dammit, dammit!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 : Oh I see, so then, you were lying.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 About what?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 About how good your cards were.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Heh... I was bluffing.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 A-ha! And... what is bluffing? Is it not another word for... lying?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 OK, sorry to break up this party, but I've got resumes to fax beforework tomorrow... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Guys	 Whoa, whoa, whoa!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Rach, Rach, we gotta settle.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Settle what?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 The... Jamestown colony of Virginia. You see, King George is giving usthe land, so...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 The game, Rachel, the game. You owe us money for the game.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh. Right.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 You know what, you guys? It's their first time, why don't we just forgetabout the money, alright?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Hell no, we'll pay!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 OK, Monica? I had another answer all ready.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 And you know what? We want a rematch.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Well that's fine with me. Could use the money.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : So basically, you get your ya-yas by taking money from all ofyour friends.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 ...Yeah.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Yes, and I get my ya-yas from Ikea. You have to put themtogether yourself, but they cost a little less.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Look, Rachel, this is poker. I play to win, alright? In order for me towin, other people have to lose. So if you're gonna play poker with me, don't expect me tobe a 'nice guy,' OK? Cause once those cards are dealt... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 ...Yeah?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I'm not a nice guy.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Alright boys, let's eat.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Oh, did you get that from the 'I Love Rachel' pizzeria?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 You still on that?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Oh, come on. What was with that whole Black Bart speech? :"When I play poker, I'm not a nice guy!"
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 You are way off, pal.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 No, I don't think so, see Ross, because I think you love her.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Um.... no. See, I might've had feelings for her at one timenot anymore. I justI...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Marcel! Where are you going with that disc?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 You are not putting that on again! Marcel, OKif you press thatbutton, you are in very, very big trouble.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Can you believe what a jerk Ross was being?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Yeah, I know. He can get really competitive.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Ha. Ha, ha.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Oh, hello, kettle? This is Monica. You're black.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Please! I am not as bad as Ross.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh, I beg to differ. The Pictionary incident?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 That was not an incident! I-I was gesturing, a-and the plateslipped out of my hand.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oooooh.  : Oh! I got an interview! I got aninterview!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 You're kidding! Where? Where?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : Sak's... Fifth... Avenue.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Oh, Rachel!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Oh, it's like the mother ship is calling you home.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Well, what's the job?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Assistant buyer. Oh! I would be shopping... for a living!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 OK, look. That is Aunt Iris. This woman has been playing poker since shewas five. You gotta listen to every word she says.  Hi!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Aunt Iris	 Is Tony Randall dead?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 No.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 I don't think so.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Why?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Aunt Iris	 Well, he may be now, because I think I hit him with my car.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh my God!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Really?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Aunt Iris	 No! That's bluffing. Lesson number one.  Let metell you something... everything you hear at a poker game is pure crap. : Niceearrings.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Thank y... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Aunt Iris	 Girls, sit down.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Uh, Aunt Iris? This is Phoebe, and that's Rachel...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Aunt Iris	 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, listen, I am parked at a meter. Let'sdo it.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Ross, could we please, please, please listen to anything else?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Alright.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I'm gonna pay for that tonight.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Hi!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Hey.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Guys! Guess what, guess what, guess what, guess what!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Um, ok... the... the fifth dentist caved and now they're allrecommending Trident?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Noooo... the interview! She loved me! She absolutely loved me. We talkedfor like two and a half hours, we have the same taste in clothes, andoh, I went tocamp with her cousin... And, oh, the job is perfect. I can do this. I can do this well!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	All	 That's great! That's wonderful!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh God, oh, and then she told the funniest story...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 OK, great. You'll tell us and we'll laugh. Let's play poker.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Alright now listen, you guys, we talked about it, and if you don't want toplay, we completely understand.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Oh yes, yes, we could play some other game... like, uh, I don'tknow... Pictionary?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Ha, ha, very funny, very funny. But I think we'd like to give pokeranother try. Shall we, ladies?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe, Rachel	 Yes, we should. I think we should.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uh, Rach, do you want me to shuffle those?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 No, no, thats OK. Y'know, I think I'm gonna give it a go.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Alright.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Alright... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 So, Phoebs owes $7.50, Monica, you owe $10, and Rachel, you owe fifteenbig ones.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 But hey, thanks for teachin' us Cross-Eyed Mary. You guys, we gotta playthat at our regular game.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Alright, here's my $7.50.  But I think you shouldknow that this money is cursed.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Oh, I cursed it. So now bad things will happen to he who spends it.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 That's alright, I'll take it. Bad things happen to me anyway. This wayI can break 'em up with a movie.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Well, that just leaves the big Green poker machine, who owes fifteen...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo, I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, Ihave to win money to exert my power over women. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 You know what? This is not over. We will play you again, and we willwin, and you will lose, and you will beg, and we will laugh, and we will take every lastdime you have, and you will hate yourselves forever.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Hmm. Kinda stepped on my point there, Mon.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 So, you gals wanna hand over your money now? That way, we don't have to gothrough the formality of actually playing.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Ooooh, that's fine. We'll see who has the last laugh there, monkey boy.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 OK, we done with the chit-chat? Are we ready to play some serious poker?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	  Hey you guys, look,the one-eyed jack follows me wherever I go.  Right, OK, serious poker.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Excuse me, where are you going?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uh... to the bathroom.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Do you want to go to the bathroom, or do you wanna play poker?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I want to go to the bathroom. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Alright, well, I'm gonna order a pizza. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no-no-no, I'm still waiting to hear from that job and the storecloses at nine, so you can eat then.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 That's fine. I'll just have a Tic-Tac to hold me over.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Alright, Cincinnati, no blinds, everybody ante. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	  Yes!  .... or no.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Alright. : Your money's mine, Green.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Your fly is open, Geller. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J.'Coincidence?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Hey, that's... that's 'joincidence' with a 'C'!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Uh... Phoebe? Phoebe?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Yeah. Um... I'm out. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 I'm in.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Me too.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Me too. Alright, whattaya got.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Well, you better hop outta the shower, cause... I gotta flush. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Well, well, well, hop back in bucko, cause I got four sixes!  I won! I actually won! Oh my God! Y'know what?  I think I'm gonnamake a little Ross pile.  I think that one was Ross's, and Ithinkohthat one was Ross's. Yes! : Well, I have got yourmoney, and you'll never see it...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 And your fly's still open...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Ha, I made you look.... 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 I couldn't be inner. Monica?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Monica, in or out?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	  I hate this game! 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 OK Joey, your bet.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Ahhh, I fold like a cheap hooker who got hit in the stomach by a fat guywith sores on his face.  Oh, I'm out.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Ross?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Oh, I am very in.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Chandler?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Couldn't be more out. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Me too. Rachel.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Uh, I will see you... and I'll raise you.  What doyou say... want to waste another buck?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No, not this time.  So... what'd you have?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 I'm not telling. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Come on, show them to me. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 No..!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Show them to me!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Get your hands out of there! No!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Let me see! Show them!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Y'know, I've had dates like this.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Boy, you really can't stand to lose, can you? Yourwhole face is getting red... little veins popping out on your temple...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Plus that shirt doesn't really match those pants.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 First of all, I'm not losing...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh, you are losing. Definitely losing. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Let's not talk about losing. Just deal the...
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Hel-lo, Rachel Green.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	  Mee mee, mee-mee mee.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Excuse me.  It's about the job.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Barbara! Hi, how are you?  Uh-huh.  No, I understand.Yeah. Oh, oh, come on, no, I'm fine. Don't be silly. Yeah... oh, but you know, if-ifanything else opens up, pleaHello? Hello? 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Sorry, Rach.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 Y'know, there's gonna be lots of other stuff.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Yeah.......OK. Where were we? Oh, OK... five card draw, uh...jacks or better... nothing wild, everybody ante.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Look, Rachel, we don't have to do this.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Yes, we do. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Alright, check.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Check.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I'm in for fifty cents. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Call.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 I'm in.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 I see your fifty cents... and I raise you... five dollars. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I thought, uh... it was a fifty cent limit.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Well, I just lost a job, and I'd like to raise the bet five bucks. Doesanybody have a problem with that?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : Loser?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 No, I fold. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 What do you mean, you fold? Hey, come on! What is this? I thought that'once the cards were dealt, I'm not a nice guy.' I mean, what, were you just full of it?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I'm in. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 How many you want?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 One. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Dealer takes two.  What do you bet?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I bet two dollars. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 OK... see your two... and I raise you twenty. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 I see your twenty, raise you twenty-five. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 See your twenty-five...and...uh, Monica, get my purse.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 Rachel, there's nothing in it.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 OK, then get me your purse.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 OK, here you go. Good luck.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 : Thank you. : I saw your twenty-five, and I raiseyou... seven.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 ...teen! 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 : Joey, I'm a little shy.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 That's OK, Ross, you can ask me. What?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 : What do you need, what do you need?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Fifteen.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Alright, here's ten. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Here, I got five, I got five. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Thank you.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Good luck.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 : OK, I am calling your seventeen. What do you got?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	  Full house.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 You got me.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 : Ahhh, that's alright. Y'know, that's a tough hand to beat.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 : I thought we had them!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Oh, well, when you don't have the cards, you don't have the cards, youknow.  But, uh... look how happy she is. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Airplane! Airport! Airport '75! Airport'77! Airport '79!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Oh, time's up.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	  Bye... bye... BIRDIE.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	 Oh!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 That's a bird?
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Phoebe	 That's a bird!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 OK, OK, it's my turn. 
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Chandler	 Go.
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Ross	 Uh.... bean! Bean!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Joey	  The Unbearable Likeness of Being!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Rachel	 Yes!
01	18	0118	The One With All The Poker	Monica	 That, you get? That, you get?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Okay, okay, I checked. We have: Earl Grey, English Breakfast, CinnamonStick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and.. oh, wait, there's one more, um.. LemonSoother. You're not the guy that asked for the tea, are you?  Okay.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Mail call, Rachel Green, bunk seven.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Thank you.  Oh, cool! Free sample of coffee!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Oh good! 'Cause where else would we get any?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh. Right. ...Oh great.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 What is it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Country club newsletter. My mother sends me the engagement notices for'inspiration.' Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Barry and Mindy!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Barry who you almost...?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Barry who I almost.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 And Mindy, your maid of...?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Mindy, my maid of. Oh!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	  That's Mindy? Wow, she is pretty.  Lucky.To have had a friend like you.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marcel. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Bring me the rice, c'mon. Good boy. Goodboy. C'mere, gimme the rice.  Thank you, good boy. Well, I seehe's finally mastered the difference between 'bring me the' and 'pee in the'.  'Bring me the' and- Rach?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 What?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Hi.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry. Oh, this is so stupid! I mean, I gave Barry up, right? Ishould be happy for them! I am, I'm happy for them.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Really.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 No. Oh, oh, I guess it would be different if I were- with somebody.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Whoah, uh, what happened to, uh, 'Forget relationships! I'm done withmen!' The whole, uh, penis embargo?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the rightguy, y'know? I mean, with Barry, it was safe and it was easy, but there was no heat. WithPaolo, that's all there was, was heat! And it was just this raw, animal, sexual...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Wait-wait. I, I got it. I was there.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Well, I mean, do you think you can ever have both? Y'know? Someone who'slike, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Yes. Yes. Yes! Yes, I really do! In fact, it's funny, very often, someonewho you wouldn't think could-could curl your toes, might just be the one who...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Hi.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 ...Gets interrupted. Hi!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Hi, how was the movie?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Wonderful!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 So good!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Suck-fest.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Toootal chick-flick.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 I-I'm sorry it wasn't one of those movies with, like, y'know, guns andbombs and, like, buses going really fast...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Hey, I don't need violence to enjoy a movie. Just so long as there's alittle nudity.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 There was nudity!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 I meant female nudity. Alright? I don't need to see LouGrant frolicking.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica, Phoebe	 Hugh! Hugh Grant!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Alright, I've gotta go. C'mon, Marcel! C'mon! We're gonna go take a bath.Yes we are, aren't we? Yes, we are.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 They're still just friends, right?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	  And I will see you tomorrow!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 That's right, you're gonna spend tomorrow at Aunt Rachel's, aren't you.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Oh, hang on, hang on. Does Aunt Monica get a say in this?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 'Pwease, Aunt Monica, pwease?' Oh, unclench. You're not even gonna bethere.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 I can't believe we are even having this discussion.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 I agree. I'm, like, in disbelief.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 I mean, don't you think if things were gonna happen with Rachel, theywould've happened already?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 I'm telling you, she said she's looking for a relationship with someoneexactly like me.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 She really said that?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Well, I added the 'exactly like me' part... But she said she's looking forsomeone, and someone is gonna be there tonight.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 'Tonight' tonight?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Well, I think it's perfect. Y'know, it's just gonna be the two of us, shespent all day taking care of my monkey...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 I can't remember the last time I got a girl to take care of my monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Anyway, I figured after work I'd go pick up a bottle of wine, go overthere and, uh, try to woo her.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Hey, y'know what you should do? You should take her back to the1890's, when that phrase was last used.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Now, now the one in the feather boa, that's Dr. Francis. Now, she usedto be a man. Okay, now look, see, there's Raven. We hate her. We're glad she's dying.Okay-  Wh- wh- Marcel, are you playing withMonica's shoes? You know you're not supposed to pl- whoah. Marcel, did you poo in theshoe?  Marcel, bad monkey! Oh! Oh!  Sorry, Barry.Little engagement gift. I'm sure you didn't register for that.  Who died?Who died? Roll him over! Oh, c'mon, roll him over! Oh...! Well, we know it wasn't Dexter,right Marcel? Because-  Marcel? Marc- 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 How could you lose him?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 I don't know. We were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe-
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Wait. He pooped in my shoe? Which one?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 I don't know. The left one.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Which ones?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh. Oh, those little clunky Amish things you think go with everything.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	  Hey. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	All	 Hi.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Whoah, ooh, why is the air in here so negative?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Rachel lost Marcel.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh no, how?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 He- he pooped in my shoe.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Which one?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Those cute little black ones I wear all the time.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 No, which one? The right or left? 'Cause the left oneis lucky...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 C'mon, you guys, what're we gonna do, what're we gonna do?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Alright alright. You're a monkey. You're loose in the city. Where do yougo?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Okay, it's his first time out, so he's probably gonna wanna do some ofthe touristy things. I'll go to Cats, you go to the Russian Tea Room.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, my, God, c'mon, you guys! He's gonna be home any minute! He's gonnakill me!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Okay, we'll start with the building. You guys take the first and secondfloor, Phoebe and I'll take third and fourth.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Well, what'm I gonna do? What'm I gonna do?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Okay, you stay here, and just wait by the phone. Spray Lysol inmy shoe, and wait for Ross to kill you.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Anybody wanna trade? Oh...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 Whaddyou want?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Mr. Heckles, our friend lost a monkey. Have you seen it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 I left a Belgian waffle out here, did you take it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 No!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Why would you leave your Belgian waffle in the hall?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 I wasn't ready for it.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 A monkey. Have you seen a monkey?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 Saw Regis Philbin once...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Okay, thank you, Mr. Heckles. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 You owe me a waffle.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	  Okay, he's a, he's a black capuchian monkey with a whiteface...  ...with, with Russian dressing and, and pickles on the side. Okay.Thanks.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Hey. How did, uh, how'd it go today?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Great! It went great. Really great. Hey, is that wine?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Yeah. You, uh, you want some?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, I would love some. But y'know what? Y'know what? Let's not drink ithere. I'm feeling kinda crazy. You wanna go to Newark?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Uh, okay, yeah, we could do that, but before we head off to the murdercapital of the North-East, I was, uh, kinda wanting to run something by you. Y'know how wewere, uh, y'know, talking before about, uh, relationships and stuff? Well-
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh God, Ross, I cannot do this.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Okay, quick and painful.  
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh God... Okay. Alright. Alright. Okay. Ross, please don't hate me.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, what? What-what?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Y'know Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 ...Yeah?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Well, I kind of... I kind of lost him.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	  I- I- I ca- I can't believe this. I mean, all I asked you to dowas keep him in the apartment.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 I know, I know, I'm sorry-
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 No, y'know what, I guess it's partially my fault. Y'know, I shouldn't've,uh, asked you to start off with a monkey. I should've started you off with like a pen or apencil.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	  Ross, I'm doing everything that I can, I've got everybodylooking for him, and I-  Oh! Who is it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Intercom	 Animal Control.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 See? I've even called Animal Control!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 You called Animal Control?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Uh-huh... why... do you not like them?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marcel is an illegal exotic animal. I'm not allowed tohave him in the city. If they find him, they'll take him away from me.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 O-okay, now see, you never ever ever told us that...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 That's right, I.. 'cause I didn't expect you were gonna invite them to theapartment!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Hi, thanks for coming.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	  Somebody called about a monkey?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, y'know what? That was a complete misunderstanding! 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Yeah, we thought we had a monkey, but we-we didn't.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Turned out it was a hat.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Cat!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Cat! What'm I saying? Cat!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Hi. We checked the third and fourth floor, no-one's seen Marcel.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 My uncle Marcel.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh, is that who the monkey's named after?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Oookay. Are you aware that possession of an illegal exotic is, uh,punishable by up to two years in prison and confiscation of the animal?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh my God. You'd put that poor little creature in jail?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Pheebs, you remember how we talked about saying things quietly toyourself first?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yes, but there isn't always time!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Look. I'm sure there's some friendly way to reconcile this! Um, have aseat. First of all, we haven't been introduced, I'm Monica Geller.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Oh my God, you are! And you're Rachel Green!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Yeah!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Luisa Gianetti! Lincoln High? I sat behind you guys in home room!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Luisa? Oh my God! Monica! It's Luisa!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 The Luisa from home room!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Yes!!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 You have no idea who I am, do you.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 No, none at all.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 None.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Well, maybe that's because you spent four years ignoring me. I mean,would it have been so hard to say 'Morning, Luisa'? Or 'Nice overalls'?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Oh, I'm- I'm so sorry!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Ah, it's not so much you, you were fat, you had your own problems.  But you? What a bitch!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 What?!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Be that as it may, d'you think you could just help us out here on thatmonkey thing? Y'know, just for old times' sake? Go Bobcats?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 I could... but I won't. If I find that monkey, he's mine. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Dun-dun-duuuur! Sorry.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Woman No. 1	 Hi, can I help you?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Um, we're kind of having an emergency and we-we were looking forsomething...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 A monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Yes have you seen any?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Woman No. 1	 No. No, haven't seen a monkey. Do you know anything about fixingradiators?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Um, sure! Did you, uh, did you try turning the knob back the other way?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Woman No. 1	 Of course.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Oh. Then, no.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Woman No. 2	 Did I put too much rum in here?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Woman No. 1	 Just a sec.  Hope you find your monkey. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Oh, nononowaitwaitwaitnono! Uh... we may not know anything aboutradiators per se, but we do have a certain amount of expertise in the heating andcooling... mileu.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Uh, aren't we kind of in the middle of something here?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Yes, but these women are very hot, and they need our help! And they'revery hot.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 We can't, alright?  We're sorry. You have no idea how sorry,but... We promised we'd find this monkey. If you see him, he's about yea high and answersto the name Marcel, so if we could get some pictures of you, you'd really be helping usout.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Okay, from now on, you don't get to talk to other people.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Marcel?!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Both	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh-my-God!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Whaaat!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Something just brushed up against my right leg!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 What is it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh, it's okay, it was just my left leg.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Look, Phoebe!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yeah! Oh, c'mere, Marcel! Oh, Marcel, c'mere!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Step aside, ladies! 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 What're you gonna do?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Just a small tranquiliser.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Run, Marcel, run! Run, Marcel!  Are you okay?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Yeah, think so. Oh!  Huh.  Whoah.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Oh gosh.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marc- oh, this is ridiculous! We've been all over the neighbourhood. He'sgone, he's-he's just gone.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Ross, you don't know that.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Oh come on. It's cold, it's dark, he doesn't know the Village.  And now I have a broken foot. I have no monkey, and a broken foot!Thank you very much.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Ross, I said I'm sorry like a million times. What do you want me to do?You want me to break my foot too? Okay, I'm gonna break my foot, right here.  Ow!! Oh! Oh my God, oh my God! There, are you happy now?!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Yeah, yeah. Y'know, now that you kicked the sign, hey! I don't miss Marcelany more!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Y'know, it is not like I did this on purpose.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, no no no. Nono, this is just vintage Rachel. I mean, things just sortof happen around you. I mean, you're off in Rachel-land, doing your Rachel-thing, totallyoblivious to people's monkeys, or to people's feelings...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Ross.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 I don't even wanna hear it, you're just...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Ross.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Oh, forget it, okay?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Ross!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 What? What?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Both	 Hey! Hey, Bananaman!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh, this is so intense. One side of my butt is totally asleep, and theother side has no idea.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Hi, did you order some bananas?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 What about it?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Gimme back my monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 I don't have a monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Then what's with all the bananas?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 Potassium.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marcel? Marcel? Okay, where is he? Where is he? Marcel? Marcel?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Marcel! What've you done to him?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 That's my monkey. That's Patti, Patti the monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Are you insane? C'mere, Marcel, c'mon. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 C'mere, Patti. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 C'mere, Marcel. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 C'mere, Patti. 
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	  Here, monkey. Here, monkey! Here, monkey!  Gotcha.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Okay, gimme my monkey back.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 That's my monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 You're both gonna have to take this up with the judge.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Mr. Heckles	 That's not my monkey. Just the dress is mine, you can send thatback whenever.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Alright, I want my monkey.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 No!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, c'mon, Luisa!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Sorry, prom queen.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	  You had to be a bitch in high school, you couldn't've beenfat.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Alright. In high school I was the prom queen and I was the homecomingqueen and the class president and you... were also there! But if you take this monkey, Iwill lose one of the most important people in my life. You can hate me if you want, butplease do not punish him. C'mon, Luisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here!Take it!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Luisa	 Nope.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Alright. Well then how about I call your supervisor, and I tell her thatyou shot my friend in the ass with a dart?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 It'll be nice to get this off finally, won't it? Yes it will.  Or we can leave it on for now, that's fine.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Y'know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great littleoutfit.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Listen, I'm- I'm sorry I was so hard on you before, it's just I...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, c'mon. It's my fault, I almost lost your...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Yeah, but you were the one who got him back, y'know? You, you were great....Hey, we uh, we still have that, uh, that bottle of wine. You in the mood for, uh,something grape?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 That'd be good.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 Alright.  The, uh, the neighbours must bevacuuming.  Well, so long as we're here and, uh,not on the subject, I was thinking about, uh, how mad we got at each other before, and,um, I was thinking maybe it was partially because of how we, um...
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Barry	 Rachel.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Rachel	 Barry?!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Barry	 I can't. I can't do it, I can't marry Mindy. I think I'm stillin love with you.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross, Rachel	 Oh!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Ross	 We have got to start locking that door!
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 This is me in The Sound of Music. See the von Trapp kids?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Nope.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 That's because I'm in front of them.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Eh. I thought that was an alp.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Well, high school was not my favourite time.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Joey	 I dunno, I loved high school. Y'know? It was just four years of partiesand dating and sex.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Chandler	 Yeah, well I went to boarding school with four hundred boys. Any sex Ihad would've involved a major lifestyle choice.
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Monica	 Gosh, doesn't it seem like a million years ago?
01	19	0119	The One Where The Monkey Gets Away	Phoebe	 Oh. Oooh! Ooh! Ooh!  Ooh! Mybutt cheek is waking up! Oooh! Ooh!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I can't believe you would actually say that. I would muchrather be Mr.Peanut than Mr.Salty.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 No way! Mr.Salty is a sailor, all right, he's got to be, like, thetoughestsnack there is.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 I don't know, you don't wanna mess with corn nuts. They're craaazy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	  Oh my God. You guys! You gotta come seethis! There's some creep out there with a telescope!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 I can't believe it! He's looking right at us!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, that is so sick.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I feel violated. And not in a good way.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 How can people do that?...  Oh, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy got gravity boots!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I am telling you, years from now, schoolchildren will study it as oneof the greatest first dates of all time. It was unbelievable! We could totally beourselves, we didn't have to play any games...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 So have you called her yet?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Let her know I like her? What are you, insane?  It's the next day! How needy do I want to seem?  I'mright, right?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey, Ross	 Oh, yeah. Yeah. Let her dangle.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 I can't believe my parents are actually pressuring me to find one of youpeople.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Oh, God, just do it!  Call her! Stop being sotestosteroney!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Which, by the way, is the real San Francisco treat.  I got her machine.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Her answer machine?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 No, interestingly enough her leaf blower picked up.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 So, uh, why didn't you say anything?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Oh, no-no-no-no. Last time I left a spontaneous message I ended upusing the phrase "Yes indeedy-o."
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Look look! It's Rachel and Barry. No, don't everybody look at once!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Okay, okay, what's going on?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Okay, they're just talking...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Yeah, well, does he look upset? Does he look like he was just told toshove anything?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 No, no actually, he's smiling.. and... Oh my God, don't do that!!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 What? What? What?!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 That man across the street just kicked that pigeon!  Oh!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	  And basically, that's how a bill becomes a law.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	All	 Oh!... Right!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Hey Rach!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 How'd it go?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Y'know, it was, uh.. it was actually really great. He took me to lunchat the Russian Tea Room, and I had that chicken, where y'know you poke it and allthe butter squirts out...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Not a good day for birds...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Then we took a walk down to Bendall's, and I told him not to,but he got me a little bottle of Chanel...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 That's nice... now, was that before or after you told him to stop calling,stop sending you flowers and to generally leave you alone, hmm?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Right,.. well,.. we never actually got to that... Oh, it was just sonice to see him again, y'know? It was comfortable, it was familiar... it was just nice!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 That's, that's nice twice!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Rachel, what's going on? I mean isn't this the same Barry who you leftat the altar?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Duh, where've you been?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Yeah, but it was different with him today! And he wasn't, like,Orthodontist Guy, y'know? I mean, we had fun! Is there anything wrong with that?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Yes!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Why?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I have my reasons.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Okay, how about the fact that he's engaged to another woman, who justhappens to be your ex-best friend?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 All right. All right, all right, all right, all right, I know it'sstupid! I will go see him this afternoon, and I will just put an end to it!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Wow... Wow!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Yeah.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 I'm not crazy, right? I mean, it was never like that.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Nooo, it wasn't.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Ooh, and it's so nice having this little sink here...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	  Oh, Danielle! I wasn't expecting themachine... Give me a call when you get a chance.  Bye-bye.  Oh God!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 That's what you've been working on for the past twohours?!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Hey, I've been honing!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 What was with the dishes?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Oh, uh.. I want her to think I might be in a restaurant.. y'know? Imight have some kind of life, like I haven't been sitting around here honing for the pastfew hours.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	  Look look! He's doing it again, the guy withthe telescope!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Oh my God!  Go away!  Stop looking inhere!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Great, now he's waving back.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Man, we gotta do something about that guy. This morning, I caught himlooking into our apartment. It creeps me out! I feel like I can't do stuff!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 What kinda stuff?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Will you grow up? I'm not talking about sexy stuff, but, like, when I'mcooking naked.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 You cook naked?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Yeah, toast, oatmeal... nothing that spatters.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 What are you looking at me for? I didn't know that.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 What's the matter?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, it's just... Oh, Barry, this was not good.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 No, it was. It was very very good.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Well, what about Mindy?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Oh, way, way better than Mindy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 No, not that, I mean, what about you and Mindy?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Well, if you want, I'll justI'll just break it off with her.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 No. No-no-no-no, no. I mean, don't do that. Not, I mean not for me. 
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Bernice	  Dr. Farber, Bobby Rush is here for his adjustment.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	  Thanks, Bernice.  Let's go away this weekend.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, Barry..! Come on, this is all way too..
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 We can, we can go to Aruba! When I went there on what would have been ourhoneymoon, it was, uh... it was really nice. You would've liked it.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 I had a bra.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Bobby	 Hey, Dr. Farber.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 All right Miss Green, everything looks fine... Yep, I think we'restarting to see some real progress here.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 What?!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Bobby	 I'm twelve, I'm not stupid.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Can I use your phone?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Yeah.. uh, but for future reference, that thing in your hand can also beused as a phone.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Yes, it's working! Why isn't she calling me back?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Maybe she never got your message.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Y'know, if you want, you can call her machine, and if she has a lot ofbeeps, that means she probably didn't get her messages yet.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Y'don't think that makes me seem a little...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 ...desperate, needy, pathetic?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Ah, you obviously saw my personal ad.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 How many beeps?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 She answered.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Y'see, this is where you'd use that 'hello' word we talked about.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I'm not gonna talk to her, she obviously got my message and ischoosing not to call me. Now I'm needy and snubbed. God, I miss just being needy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	All	 Hey! Hi!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 How'd he take it?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Pretty well, actually... 
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	  Uh, Rach... how come you have dental floss inyour hair?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, do I?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Uh huh.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	  We ended up having sex in his chair.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 You had sex in his chair?!... I saidthat a little too loudly, didn't I?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 You-you had what?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Sex in his chair.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 What, uh... what were you thinking?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 I don't know! I mean, we still care about each other. There's a historythere. 'S'like you and Carol.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 No! No no, it is nothing like me and Carol!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Please. If she said to you, "Ross, I want you on this couch, righthere, right now," what would you say? 
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 If it helps, I could slide over.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 It's, it's, it's, uh, a totally diferent situation! It's, it's apples andoranges, it's, it's orthodontists and lesbi- I gotta go.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Where are you going?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	  I just have to go, all right? Do I need a reason? Huh? I mean Ihave things to do with my life, I have a jam packed schedule, and I am late- for keepingup with it. Okay?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Hello? Hello?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	  Hello? Mindy! Hi! Hey, how are you?  Yes,yes, I've heard, congratulations, that is so great.  Really?  Oh. Okay. Okay, well I'm working tomorrow, but if you want you can, you can, you cancome by and...  Okay...  Great...  Great...  Allright, so I'll, so I'll see you tomorrow!  Okay..  Okay... Bye.  Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 So how's Mindy?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow...Oh, she sounded really weird, I gottacall Barry...  Hi, it's me, I just.. Mindy!! Mindy! Hi! No, I figuredthat's where you'd be!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Brrrrrrr!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Hell is filled with people like you.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  He's back! The peeper's back!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Get down!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Get down?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 ...And boogie!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Thanks, but I gotta go to work and get my eyes scratched out by Mindy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Relax. Y'know, she may not even know.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Please. I haven't heard from her in seven months, and now she calls me?I mean, what else is it about? Oh! She was my best friend, you guys! We went to camptogether... she taught me how to kiss..
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Yeah?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 And now, y'know, I'm like... I'm like the other woman! I feel so..
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 ..Naughty!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Right, I'll see you guys later...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Oh, hold up, I'll walk out with you. Now, Rach, when she taught you tokiss, you were at camp, and.. were you wearing any kinda little uniform, or-  That's fine, yeah...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Okay, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Will you watch my phone?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Why don't you just take it with you?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Hey, we haven't been on a second date, she needs to hear me pee?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Why don't you just call her?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 I can't call her, I left a message! I have some pride.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Do you?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 No!  Danielle, hi! It's, uh, it's Chandler!  I'm fine.Uh, listen, I don't know if you tried to call me, because, uh, idiot that I am, Iaccidentally shut off my phone.  Oh, uh, okay, that's fine, that's great. Okay.   She's on the other line, she's gonnacall me back.  She's on the other line, she's gonna call meback, she's on the other line, gonna call me back...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Don't you have to pee?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 'S'why I'm dancing...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Mindy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Hey, you.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Hey, you.... So, what's up?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Um.. we should really be sitting for this.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Sure we should... So.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Now, I know things've been weird lately, but you're like my oldest friendin the world... Except for maybe Laurie Schaffer, who I don't talk to anywhere, 'causeshe's all bitter now that she lost the weight and it turns out she doesn't have a prettyface. ....Okay, I'm just gonna ask you this once, and I want a straight answer.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Okay.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Will you be my maid of honour?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Of course!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Oh that's so great!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Was that all you wanted to ask me?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 That's all!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Ohhhh!!  ...What? What?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 That's not all.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh sure it is!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Oh no, it isn't! No! I think Barry is seeing someone in the city.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Um, what- what would make you think that?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Well, ever since we announced the engagement, he's been acting reallyweird, and then last night, he came home smelling like Chanel.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	  Really. Mindy, if it'll make you feel any better, when Iwas engaged to him he went through a whole weird thing too.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Oh God! You see, that's what I was afraid of!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 What? What's what you were afraid of?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Okay, okay... when Barry was engaged to you, he and I...kind of... had alittle thing on the side.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 What?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 I know. I know, and when he proposed to me, everyone said "Don't doit, he's just gonna do to you what he did to Rachel," and now I feel so stupid.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Uh... Oh, Mindy, you are so stupid. Oh, we are both so stupid.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 What do you mean?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	  Smell familiar?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Oh no.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh, I am so sorry.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 No me, I am so sorry...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Oh my.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Four letters: "Circle or hoop".
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Ring dammit, ring!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Thanks.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Hey, you know our phone's not working?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 What?!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 I tried to call you from the coffee shop, and there was no answer.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	  I turned it off. Mother of God, I turned it off!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Just like you told her you did!  ... Justpointing out the irony.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Hey, so listen, I went across the street and talked to the doorman- I gotthe peeper's name! Can I use the phone?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Nngghhh!!!!!!!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Can I use your phone?  Yeah, the number for a SidneyMarks, please.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 "Heating device."
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Radiator.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Five letters.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Rdtor.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Yeah, is Sidney there?  Oh, this is? Sidney's a woman.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 So she's a woman! So what?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Yeah. Yeah, so what?  Look, I live across the street,  and I know all about you and your little telescope, and I don't appreciateit, okay?  Yeah, I can see you right now!  Hello!  If I wannawalk around my apartment in my underwear, I shouldn't have to feellikeThank you, but... that's not really the point...  Thepoint is that...  Mostly free weights, but occasionally..
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Joey!!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	  Yeah, my neighbor...  Yeah, the brunette...  She says you looked very pretty the other day in the green dress.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 The green dress? Really?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Yeah, she said you looked like Ingrid Bergman that day.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	  Nooo!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Hey. Got a second?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Sure, sure. Come on...  ...in...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Hello, sweetheart.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Uh... uh... what're'you... what're'you guys doing here?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Uh, we are here to break up with you.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Both of you?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Basically, we think you're a horrible human being, and bad things shouldhappen to you.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 I'm sorry... I'm sorry, God, I am so sorry, I'm an idiot, I was weak, Icouldn't help myself! Whatever I did, I only did because I love you so much!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Uh- which one of us are you talking to there, Barr?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 ....Mindy. Mindy, of course Mindy, it was always Mindy.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Even when we were having sex in that chair?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	  I swear, whatever I was doing, I was always thinking of you.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Please! During that second time you couldn't have picked her out of alineup!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	  You did it twice?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Well, the first time didn't really count... I mean, y'know, 's'Barry.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Okay...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	  Sweetheart, just gimme- gimme another chance, okay, we'llstart all over again. We'll go back to Aruba.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Bernice	  Dr. Farber, we've got a bit of an emergencyhere...Jason Costalano is choking on his retainer.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Barry	 Oh God...  I'll be right there, Bernice.  Look,please, please don't go anywhere, okay? I'll be, I'll be right back.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Okay. Okay, we'll be here! Hating you! Did you see how he was sweatingwhen he walked out of there? Listen honey, if I'm hogging the ball too much you just jumpright in there and take a couple punches because I'm telling you, this feels great.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Yeah... I'm pretty sure I'm still gonna marry him.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 What are you talking about?! Mindy, the guy is the devil! He's Satan ina smock!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 Look, I know he's not perfect, but the truth is, at the end of the day, Istill really wanna be Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber, D.D.S.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Oh God. 
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Mindy	 I hope you can find some way to be happy for me. And I hope you'll stillbe my maid of honor...?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 And I hope Barry doesn't kill you and eat you in Aruba.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 You okay?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Yeah.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Really?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 Yeah! Y'know, ever since I ran out on Barry at the wedding, I havewondered whether I made the right choice. And now I know.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Aww... 
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 Big day.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Joey	 All right, I'll give you this, Mr. Peanut is a better dresser. I mean he'sgot the monocle, he's got the top hat...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 You know he's gay?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 I just wanna clarify this: are you outing Mr. Peanut?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Danielle	  Chandler?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Danielle! Hi! Uh- everybody, this is Danielle, Danielle, everybody.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	All	 Hi. Hi.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 What are you doing here?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Danielle	 Well, I've been calling you, but it turns out I had yournumber wrong. And when I finally got the right one from Information, there was no answer.So I thought I'd just come down here, and make sure you were okay.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 ...I'm, I'm okay.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Danielle	 Listen uh, maybe we could get together later?
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 That sounds good. I'll call you- or you call me, whatever...
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Danielle	 You got it.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Okay.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Danielle	 G'bye, everybody.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	All	 Bye.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Phoebe	 Whoo-hoo!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Monica	 Yeah, there you go!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Ross	 Second date!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 ...I dunno.
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Rachel	 You don't know?!
01	20	0120	The One With The Evil Orthodontist	Chandler	 Well, she seems very nice and everything, but that whole thing abouther coming all the way down here, just to see if I was okay? I mean,... how needy is that?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 How could someone get a hold of your credit card number?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 I have no idea. But look how much they spent!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Monica, would you calm down? The credit card people said that you onlyhave to pay for the stuff that you bought.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 I know. It's just such reckless spending.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 I think when someone steals your credit card, they've kind of alreadythrown caution to the wind.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Wow, what a geek. They spent $69.95 on a Wonder Mop.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 That's me.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Oh! The yuk! Ross, he's doing it again! 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Marcel, stop humping the lamp! Stop humping! Now Marcel, come back- come here, Marcel-
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Oh no, not in my room! I'll get him.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Ross, you've got to do something about the humping.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 What? It's, it's just a phase.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Well, that's what we said about Joey...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Would you all relax? It's not that big a deal.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	  Stop it! Marcel! Bad monkey!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 What?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Oh, Monica. You are not still going over that thing.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 This woman's living my life.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 What?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 She's living my life, and she's doing it better than me! Look at this,look. She buys tickets for plays that I wanna see. She, she buys clothes from stores thatI'm intimidated by the sales people. She spent three hundred dollars on art supplies.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 You're not an artist.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Yeah, well I might be if I had the supplies! I mean, I could do all thisstuff. Only I don't.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Oh really? Okay, let's compare, shall we.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	  Oh, it's so late for 'Shall we'...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Do I go horseback riding in the park? Do I take classes at the NewSchool?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	  Nooo...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have mymother.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 How about Joey... Pepponi?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 No, still too ethnic. My agent thinks I should have a name that's moreneutral.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Joey... Switzerland?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Plus, y'know, I think it should be Joe. Y'know, Joey makes me sound likeI'm, I dunno, this big.  Which I'm not.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Joe...Joe...Joe...Stalin?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Stalin...Stalin...do I know that name? It sounds familiar.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Well, it does not ring a bell with me...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	  Joe Stalin. Y'know, that's pretty good.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Might wanna try Joseph.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Oh yes! Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. Joseph Stalin is theFiddler on the Roof.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Hey.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Hey.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Hi.  Hi, uh, yes, this is Monica Geller. Um, I believe I'mtaking some classes with you and I was wondering what they were.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 What are you doing?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	  Alright, great. Thanks a lot.  I'm going to tapclass.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 What, what, so that you can dance with the woman that stole your creditcard?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 This woman's got my life, I should get to see who she is.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Go to the post office! I'm sure her picture's up! ...Okay, Monica,y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! I mean, this is really becoming like aweird obsession thing.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God,Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 What d'you think?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Lotsa things.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Which one do you think she is?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 May I help you?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Oh, no thanks, we're just here to observe.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 You don't observe a dance class. You dance
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 What does she mean?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 I think she means  'You dance
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Okay, d'y'see anybody you think could be me?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	  People! Last time there were some empty yoghurtcontainers lying around after class. Let's not have that happen again!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 She could be you.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 Let's get started. Five, six, a-five six seven eight...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Okay, I'm not getting this!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	  I'm totally getting it!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Did you ever feel like sometimes you are just so unbelievablyuncoordinated?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 What? You just click when they click.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 Alright people, now everyone grab a partner.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Okay. And, my, dead, mother, says, you, are, it. I'm with Rachel.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Great. It's gym class all over again.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe, Rachel	 Aww.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 Well that's all right, you can come up to the front and dance with me.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Why don't I just take off my clothes and have a nightmare.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Woman	 It's okay, it's okay, I'm here, I'm here. Sorry I'm late, okay, here Iam. Who's the new tense girl?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 She's your partner.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Woman	 Hi. I'm Monica.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Oh. Monica! ...Hi. I'm Mo- ...nana.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Woman	  Monana?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Yeah. It's Dutch.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 You're kidding! I-I spent three years in Amsterdam. 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Um, Pennsylvania Dutch.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 And we're dancing. A-five, six, seven, eight...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	  Hi.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler, Joey	 Hey.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Where've you been?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 At the vet.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 She's not gonna make you wear one of those big plastic cones, is she?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase. Apparently he's reachedsexual maturity.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	  Hey! He beat ya.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 She says as time goes on, he's gonna start getting agressive and violent.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 So what does this mean?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 I'm gonna have to give him up.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 I can't believe it, Ross. This sucks!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 I don't get it, I mean, you just got him. How can he be an adultalready?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 I know. I know. I mean, one day, he's this little thing, and before youknow it, he's this little thing I can't get off my leg.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Isn't there any way you can keep him?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 No, no. The vet says unless he's in a place where he has regular access tosome... monkey lovin,' he's just gonna get vicious. I've just gotta get him into a zoo.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 How do you get a monkey into a zoo?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 I know that one! ...No, that's Popes into a Volkswagen.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Well, we're applying to a lot of them. Naturally our first choice would beone of the bigger state zoos, y'know, like, uh, San Diego... right? But that might just bea pipe dream, because, y'know, he's out of state. Uh, my vet, uh, knows someone at Miami,so that's a possibility.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Yeah, but that's like two blocks away from the beach. I mean, it's atotal party zoo.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Hey. We found her, we found the girl.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 What?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Did you call the cops?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Nope. We took her to lunch.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Ah. Your own brand of vigilante justice.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 What?! Are you insane? This woman stole from you. She stole. She's astealer.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Y'know what? After you're with this woman for like ten minutes, youforget all that. I mean, she is this astounding person, with this, with this amazingspirit.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Yeah, which she probably stole from some cheerleader.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 ...Take off their hats!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Popes in a Volkswagen! ...I love that joke.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 No way. No way did you do this.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Monana was very brave.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 It was so wild. We told them we were the Gunnersens in room six fifteen.Only to find out the Boston Celtics had taken over the entire sixth floor!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 So once they caught on to the fact that we're, y'know, short andhave breasts...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 ...They threw us out! I was thrown out of a hotel! Me!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Go Monana! Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. Iget to go pour coffee for people I don't know. Don't wait up. 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Oh, by the way, tomorrow we're auditioning for a Broadway show.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 'Scuse me?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 There's an open call for Cats. I'm thinking we go down there, singMemories and make complete fools of ourselves. Whaddya say?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Nononononono. Think who you're dealing with here. I mean, I'm not likeyou. I-I can't even stand in front of a tap class.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Well, that's just probably 'cause of your Amish background.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 What?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Well, you're Pennsylvania Dutch, right?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Right. Till I bought a blow dryer, then I was shunned.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 I-I used to be just like you. And then one day I saw a movie thatchanged my life. Did you ever see Dead Poets' Society?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Uh-huh.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 I thought that movie was so incredibly... boring.I mean, that thing at the end where the kid kills himself because he can't be in the play?What was that?! It's like, kid, wait a year, leave home, do some community theatre. Iwalked out of there and I thought, 'Now, that's two hours of my life that I'm nevergetting back.' And that thought scared me more than all the other crap I was afraid to do.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Wow. Then I would definitely not recommend Mrs. Doubtfire.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	  Oh God.  We didn't get into Scranton.  That was like our safety zoo. They take like dogs and cows. See? I don't know whothis is harder on, me or him.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 I'd say that chair's taking the brunt.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Marcel! Marcel! Marcel, no! Good boy. See, how can nobody want him?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Oh, somebody will.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	  You know there already is a Joseph Stalin?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 You're kidding.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Apparently he was this Russian dictator who slaughtered all these people.You'd think you would've known that!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Y'know, you'd think I would've.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Phoebe. Whaddyou think a good stage name for me would be?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 ...Flame Boy.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Where exactly is your zoo?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 Well, it's technically not a zoo per se, it's more of aninteractive wildlife experience. Let me ask you some questions about, is it, uh, Marcel?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Yes.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 Does he, uh, fight with other animals?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 No-no, he's, he's very docile.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 Even if he were... cornered?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Well I, I don't know. Why?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 Uh, how is he at handling small objects?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 He can hold a banana, if that's whatcha mean...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 How about a hammer, or a small blade?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Why- why- why would he need a blade?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 Well, if he's up against a jungle cat or an animal with horns,you've got to give the little guy something. Otherwise it's just cruel.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler, Joey	 He- he- he got in, he- he got in to SanDiego.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 We, we come back from our walk and the- the phone was ringing...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 ...He's in.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 He's in! Oh, did you hear that, Marcel? San Diego. San Diego!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Dr. Baldhara	 You're making a big mistake here. I mean, San Diego's all well andgood, but if you give him to me, I'll start him off against a blind rabbit and give youtwenty percent of the gains.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Yo- hooo!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Where the hell've you been?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Monica and I just crashed an embassy party.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Are you drunk?!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Noooo!  I'm lying. I am so drunk.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Oh God, oh. Great, Monica, y'know what, you could've called, I have beenup here, I've been worried...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Monica? Monica!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Water rules!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Yes, yes, it does. Okay, look, the restaurant called, they wanna know ifyou're gonna be showing up for work?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Nope. Going to the Big Apple Circus today.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Okay Monica, what are you doing? You're gonna lose your job! This is notyou!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 No, it is me! Y'know, I'm not just the person who needs to fluff thepillows and pay the bills as soon as they come in! Y'know, when I'm with her, I am so muchmore than that. I'm- I'm Monana!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 Hello? Yes, she is, hold on a second, please. Monana, it's for you, thecredit card people.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Helloooo? Yeah. Oh my God. Thanks.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	 What?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 They've arrested Monica.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Hi.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Hey.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 How are you?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 I'm not too bad. Fortunately, blue's my colour. How-how did youknow I was here?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Because... I'm Monica Geller. It was my credit card you were using.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 That I was not expecting.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 I want you to know, it wasn't me who turned you in.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Oh. Thanks.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 No, thank you! You have given me so much! I mean, if it wasn't for you,I would never have gotten to sing Memories on the stage at the WintergardenTheater!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Well, actually, you only got to sing 'Memo-'.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 I just can't believe you're in here. I mean, what am I gonna do withoutyou? Who's gonna crash the embassy parties with me? Who's gonna take me to the BigApple Circus?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Monica, I started my day by peeing in front of twenty-five otherwomen, and you're worried about who's gonna take you to the Big Apple Circus?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Well, not... worried, just... wondering.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 There's nothing to wonder about, Monica. You're gonna go back tobeing exactly who you were, because that's who you are.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Not necessarily...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Yes necessarily! I mean, I dunno what it is, maybe it's the Amishthing.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Um, I'm not actually Amish.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Fake Monica	 Really? Then why are you like that?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 You by the door. In or out?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 In. 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Teacher	 You in the back, you're getting it all wrong!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Monica	 Yeah, but at least I'm doing it!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Pa	 This is the final boarding call for flight 67 to San Diego,boarding at gate 42A.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Okay. Good-bye, little monkey guy. Alright, I wrote you this poem. Okay,but don't eat it 'till you get on the plane.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Aww. Thank you, Aunt Phoebe.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Phoebe	 Oh!
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Chandler	 Okay, bye, champ. Now, I know there's gonna be a lot of babes in SanDiego, but remember, there's also a lot to learn.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 I dunno what to say, Ross. Uh, it's a monkey.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Just, just say what you feel.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Marcel, I'm hungry.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 That was good.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Rachel	  Marcel, this is for you. It's, uh, just,y'know, something to, um, do on the plane.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Uh, if you guys don't mind, I'd like to take a moment, just me and him.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	All	 Oh, sure. Sure, absolutely. 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Ross	 Marcel, c'mere, c'mere.  Well buddy, this is it. There's just a coupla things I want to say. I'm reallygonna miss you, and I'm never gonna forget about you. You've been more than just a pet tome, you've been more like a be-  Okay,Marcel, please, could you leave my leg alone? Could you just stop humping me for twoseconds?! Marcel, would- okay, just take him away. Just take him.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Actor	  Oh, that I were a gloveupon that hand, that I might... touch thy cheek...
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Casting Director No. 1	 That's fine, thank you.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Casting Director No. 2	 Next. 
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Hi, uh, I'll be reading for the role of Mercutio.
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Casting Director No. 2	 Name?
01	21	0121	The One With The Fake Monica	Joey	 Holden McGroin.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Tell him.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 No.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Tell him, tell him.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Just...please tell him.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Shut up!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Tell me what?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Look at you, you won't even look at him.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	  Oh, come on tell me. I could use another reason whywomen won't look at me.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 All right, all right, all right. Last night, I had a dream that, uh, youand I, were...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Doing it on this table. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Wow!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Exellent dream score.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Why, why, why would you dream that?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 More importantly, was I any good?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Well, you were pretty damn good.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Interesting, cause in my dreams, I'm allways surprisingly inadequate.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Well, last night you seemed to know your way around the table.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I love it, when we share.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 You're okay there?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I can't belive you two had sex in her dream.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I'm sorry, it was a one-time-thing. I was very drunk and i wassomebody else's subconscious.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Hello Rachel.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Get off.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	  Uh, uh, gimme. Can you see me operating a drillpress?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 I don't know. What are you wearing?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Pheebs, why would you want to operate a drill press?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Just for some short-term-work. You know, until I get back some of mymassage clients.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Pirates again?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 No, nothing like that. I was just...such a dummie. I taught this"massage-yourself-at-home-workshop." And they are.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Hey, hey, Chan. She could work for you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	  Thanks Joey, that's a good idea.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 What... I could, I could do it. What is it?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Well, my secretary is gonna be out for a couple of weeks. She ishaving one of her boobs redused.  It's a whole big boob story.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 I could be a secretary.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Well, you know Phoebs. I don't know if it's your kinda thing, becauseit involves a lot of being normal. For a large portion of the day.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 I could do that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 What are you playing with?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, it's my new beeper.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Is it like for dinosaur emergencies. 'Help, come quick, they're stillextinct.'
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 No, it's for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. Imean, all she has to do is to dial 55-JIMBO.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 A cool phone number, and a possible name for the kid.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 All right, I'll see you guys later. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Off to see young Ethan?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Thank you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 How young is young Ethan? Young?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 He's... our age.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 When we were?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Okay, he's a senior in college.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 College?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Whoa! And this manchild has no problem with how old you are?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 No, of course not. It's not even an issue. Cause I told him I was 22.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	All	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Oh, I can't pass for 22?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Well, maybe 25-26.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 I am 26.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 There you go.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Can you hear that?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	  Yeah?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 See that'll stop when you pick up the phone.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Oh. Uh, I'm on. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	  Mr. Bing's office.  No I'm sorry, he's in ameeting right now.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I'm not in a meeting. I'm right... Whoops.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Will he know what this is in reference to?  And he has yournumber?  All right, I'll see that he gets the message. Bye bye.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Ross says hi.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Ah!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 This is so fun. All right, what do we do now?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Well, now, I actually have to get to work.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Most likely.  Okay, I'm gonna be outthere.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 All right. Bye bye.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Bye bye.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	  Yes?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Whatcha doin'?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Ooh. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Windows are clean, candels are lit. Uh, belt's to tight, gotta changethe belt. Did I turn the fish?  No, causeI made lasagne.  Am I out of control?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Just a touch. Mon, I don't understand. I mean, you've been dating thisguy since like, what... his midterms? I mean, why all the sudden are you so... Oh.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Could tonight be the Night?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 I don't know. Look he's a great guy and I love being with him but... youknow. Things happen, and they happen. You don't plan these things.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 So, did you shave your legs?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Yeah.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 A-ha!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Would you let it go Ross. It was just a dream. It doesn't mean...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, oh. Oh, oh. Oh this is it. Oh my god it's baby time. Baby time.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 All right, relax, relax. Just relax, just relax. Be cool, be cool.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	  Yeah, hi, I was just beeped.  No, André is not here. Third time today.  Yes, I'm sure... No, sir. I don't perform thosekind of services.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Services?  Oh, services.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	  Yeah, you want 55-JUMBO. Yeah, that's right. That's right,JUMBO with a U, sir.  No, belive me, you don't want me. Judging by his number, I'dbe a huge disappointment.  All rightie, bye bye.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Hey, hey. How was the first day?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Oh, exellent. Everyone was so, so nice.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 See, it pays to know the man who wears my shoes.  Me.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 No, I didn't tell anybody that I knew you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Why not?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Oh, because, you know... they don't like you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 What?!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 I thought you knew that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Noho. Who doesn't they like me?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Everyone. Except for uh... no everyone.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 What are you talking about?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Don't feel bad. You know they used to like you a lot. But then you gotpromoted, and, you know, now you're like "Mr. Boss Man". You know, Mr. Bing. Mr.Bing, "Boss Man Bing".
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I can't belive it.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah. They even do you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 They do me?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 You know like... uh okay... uh... 'Could that report be anylater?'
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I don't sound like that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, oh Chandler...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Oh... Yeah, you do.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 'The hills were alive with the sound of music.'
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	  My scones.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe, Joey, Ross	 'My scones.'
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Okay, I don't sound like that. That is so not true.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 That is so not... That is so not...That... Oh, shut up!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Did not.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 I am telling you, up until I was, like nine, I thought thatgunpoint was an actual place where crimes happen.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 How was that possible?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Well, think about it. It's always on the news. 'A man is being heldup, at gunpoint.' 'Tourists are being terrorised, at gunpoint.' And I just kept thinking:why does people continue to go there?  Oh, ah. I should go.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Unless...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Uh, ah. Unless you wanna stay over? I mean, I'm going to, so...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Yeah, I'd really like that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Uuh, before we get into any staying-over-stuff, there is somethingyou should know.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Okay, is this like 'I have an early class tomorrow' or 'I'm secretlymarried to a goat?'
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Well it's somewhere in between. You see, in a strictly technicalsense, of course, I'm not uh..., well I, I mean I haven't ever uh...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Ethan?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Yeah?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Are you a virgin?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Well, if that's what you kids are calling it these days then, yes Iam. I uh, I've kinda been waiting for the right person.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Really?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Yeah. You do know I was talking about you, right?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Wow!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 You keep saying that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 You know, you read about it, you see it in the movies. Even whenyou practice it at home, man oh man, it is nothing like that.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Listen, uh, you told me something that was really difficult for you. AndI, I-I figured if you could be honest, then I can to.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Oh god, don't tell me, I did it wrong.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 No-no. Nothing wrong about that. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Oh.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Um, okay, here it goes. I'm not 22. I'm, I'm 25... and thirteen months. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Huh!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 But I figured, you know, that shouldn't change anything. I mean, whatthe hell does it matter how old we are.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Uh, listen um, as long as we're telling stuff, uh, I have anotherone for you. I'm a little younger than I said.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 You're not a senior?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Oh, I'm a senior... in High School.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Ok...ay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 What we did was wrong. Oh god, I just had sex with somebody that wasn'talive during the Bicentennial.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 I just had sex.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Ethan, focus. How could you not tell me?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Well, you never told me how old you were.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Well, that's different. My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48states. What were you thinking?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 I wasn't thinking. I was too busy fallin'...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Don't say it. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 ...in love with you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Really?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	  Sorry.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Well,fall out of it. You know, you shouldn't even be here, it's a schoolnight. Oh god, oh god. I'm like those women that you see with shiny guys named Chad. I'mJoan Collins.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Who? 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	  Okay, André should be there in like 45 minutes. All rightie,bye bye.  Just easier that way.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Oh, come on. You told me about the last dream.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 No, forget it.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Oh, why not. Was I doing anything particularly... saucy?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 All right, fine. Um, you were not the only one there.  Joey was there too.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 All right. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Was there...uh, huh, huh, huh... andybody, anybody else there.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 No.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 You're sure? Nobody uh, handed out uh, mints or anything?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 No, it was just the three of us.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Huh!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 So, tell me. Was it like you and Chandler, and then you and me, or you andme and Chandler?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	  You know what?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 There were times when it wasn't even me.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 That is so sweet, you guys. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross, Rachel, Phoebe	 Hey, Mon.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Mon, Ethan called again. Mon?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	All	  Mon!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Ethan called again.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Oh.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Are you not seeing him anymore?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 No. You know, sometimes just things doesn't work out.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 And this has nothing to do with the fact that he needs a note to getout of gym.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 I, I didn't say any... I sw... I did not say anything, I swear. Hestopped by.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Listen, the next time you talk to him, can you ask him which one thestrongest Power Ranger is?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, yeah.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Ha,ha, ha, oh my life is just so amusing. Could we drop it now?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey, Chander, Ross	 Sorry.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 It's morphin time!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Stegosaurus!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Tyrannosaurus!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Ooh, oh, I've gotta go.  Whoa, oh, head rush. One more, and thenI have to go.  Cool!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Where are you going?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Um, oh, I've got a birthday party, with some work people.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Work people? Nobody told me.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 No, I know. That's a part of the whole, you know,them-not-liking-you-extravaganza.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 You know, I don't get this. A month ago, these people were my friends.You know, just because I'm in charge doesn't mean I'm a different person.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Well, then you should come tonight. You know, just hang out with them.Let them see what a great guy you still are.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 You think I should?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 I really do, yeah.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Oh, but, could we not go together? I,I don't wanna be the geek thatinvited the boss.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I Think last night was great. You know, the Karaoke thing. Tracy and Idoing Ebony and Ivory.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 You were great. But they still made fun of you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 You know, now you're more like, you know like, "Mr. CaringBoss," "Mr.", you know, "I'm one of you, Boss," "Mr., Iwanna be your buddy, Boss Man Bing!"
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Then, I don't get it.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Well, you know what Chandler? I think you've gotta face it. You're like,the guy in the big office, you know. You're the one that hires them, that fires them...They still say you're a great boss.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 They do?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Uh huh. But they're not your friends anymore.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 I just wan't to...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 No, but you can't.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 But I just wa...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Uh uh.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Aren't you gonna...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, Carol and I have a new system. If she punches in 911, it means she'shaving a baby, otherwise I just ignore it.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 What about André?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Oh, well this morning he got a call from who I think was our cousinNathan, and frankly, it was a little more than I needed to know.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Hey.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 That was gonna be my opener.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	  Hey, did you guyscheck out those new hand-dryers in the bathroom?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I thought that was just a rumour.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 True story.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 They're here already?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 All right, look. I've gotta tell you something. I'm not 17. I onlysaid so that you'd think I was cute and vunerable. I'm actually 30, I have a wife, I havea job, I'm your Congressman. Monica, this is ridiculous, we're great together. We cantalk, we make each other laugh, and the sex. Oh, man, okay i have no frame of graft, but Ithought that was great.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 It was.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Then, what's the problem?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 Ethan, it's um... it's icky.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 Icky? You're actually gonna throw this away because it's icky?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 This isn't easy for me either. I wish things were different, I... If youwere a few years older, or if I was a few years younger, or if we lived in biblical times,I would really...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Young Ethan	 No, don't say it. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 ...love you.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Are you're hands still wet?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 Uh, moist, yeah.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Let's dry 'em again.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Gerston	 Uh, like, could these margaritas be any stronger? Hey, Chandler.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Santos	 Hello, Mr. Bing.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Petrie	 Loved your Stevie Wonder last night.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Thanks. Listen, about the weekly numbers, I'm gonna need them on mydesk by nine o'clock.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Santos	 Sure.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Gerston	 No problem.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 You have to give 'em something, you know. Okay, now that was Gerston,Santos, and who's the guy with the moustache?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Phoebe	 Petrie.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Petrie, right, right. Okay, some people gonna be working this weekend.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	  Oooooooooh.  Oh, that's nice. Oh, oh. Huh, Ross!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Ross?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I'm here.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 You are. Well, um... We, we, we were just...  Wow!
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 What?  Great, now I'm having a baby.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Ooh, Ooh.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 What?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I'm having... I'm having a baby.  I'mhaving a... Where's the phone? The phone?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 I don't know where the phone is.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Ross?
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 I'm hurt.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Monica, let's go. Come on now people, woman in labor.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	  Hey Ross, look what I've got going here. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Yeah, save it for the cab, okay.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 What are you doing? We're going to a hospital.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 What, so I can't lokk nice? There might be doctors there.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Joey, get out of the fridge.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 All right, all right. 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 What is that? 
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 For the ride.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Yeah, like in a cab...
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Save it.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Okay, hating this.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 Monica, come on now. Let's go, baby coming.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Monica	 I can't belive it, I'm gonna be an aunt. I'm gonna have like a nephew.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Ross	 That's nice. Get out Let's go, come on.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Joey	 All right, I'm going. I'm going.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Chandler	 Here we go, here we go.
01	22	0122	The One With The Ick Factor	Rachel	 Rossy, Rossy.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 She's not here yet. She's not here. She's having my baby and she's nothere.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 I'm sure everything's fine. Has her water broke yet?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I don't know, but when I spoke to her, she said she had already passed themucus plug.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Do we have to know about that?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Joey, what are you gonna do when you have a baby?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 I'm gonna be in the waitin' room, handing out cigars.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Yes, Joey's made arrangements to have his baby in a movie from the50's.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 God, I don't believe this. She could be giving birth in the cab.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, relax. It's probably like two dollars for the firstcontraction, and then fifty cents for each additional contraction.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 What, it's ok when Chandler does it?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 You have to pick your moments.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Did I miss it, did I miss it?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 She's not even here yet.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 What's with the guitar?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 I just thought we might be here for awhile. You know, things might getmusical.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  Where the hell have you been?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 We stopped at the gift shop.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 I was looking at stuffed animals, and Susan wanted a Chunky.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Susan wanted a Chunky. We're having a baby, ok, a baby, you don'tstop for Chunkys.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 I used to have that bumper sticker.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	  You see what I mean.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Stopped for a Chunky.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Let it go, Ross.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 I got an extra one. You want this? 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  No.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 Hey, how's my favorite parenting team doing?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Dr. Franzblau, hi.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 So, I understand you're thinking of having a baby? Well, I seeyou're nine months pregnant. That's a good start. How you doing with your contractions?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Oh, I love them. Each one's like a little party in my uterus.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 They're every four minutes and last 55 seconds.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 59 seconds.  Quartz, ha.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Swiss quartz, ha, ha.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Am I allowed to drink anything?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 Ice chips, just ice chips. They're at the nurses' station.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I'll get it.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 No, I'm getting it. I'll be right back.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I got itI'm getting it!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Hi, I thought you might like some ice chips.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Thanks.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 And if you need anything else, Ido not believe we've met. Hi. I'm, uh, Rachel Green. I'm Carol's...ex-husband's... sister's roommate. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 It is nice to meet you. I'm Dr. Franzblau. I'm your roommate's...brother's... ex-wife's obstetrician.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Oh, that's funny!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 I want a baby.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Mmmm. Not tonight, honey. I got an early day tomorrow.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Get up. Come on. Let's get some coffee.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Oh, ok, 'cause we never do that.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	  Shoot! Shoot! Shoot! Shoot, or just fall down. That's goodtoo.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Knick fan?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh, yeah.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Oh, boy, do they suck.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Hey, listen, lady.......whoa.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Look, look at your man, Ewing. Nice shot. You know what, he couldn't hitwater if he was standing on a boat.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh yeah? And who do you like?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 The Celtics.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 The Celtics? Ha. They couldn't hit a boat if...wait. They suck, alright?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Oh, shut up. You know, it's a rebuilding year. You... waah!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Wha? Wha..aa? Let me get the father. Hey, we need a father over here! Weneed a father!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 There is no father.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh, oh, oh, sorry.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Ok, that's ok. I'm fine. I'm... oh!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh, uh, ok. Right this way. All the other pregnant women seem to be goin'in here.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Ok.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	  
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Thanks, Ross.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Yeah. I'm paying you to stop.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Ok.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 You'll get one.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Oh yeah? When?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us aremarried, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Oh, no, no. I just meant hypothetically.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 No, no, no.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	  Uh, uh.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Well?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack! 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Hey.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Hey. Ooh, look at you, dressy-dress.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Did you go home and change?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Yeah, well, it's an important day. I wanna look nice. Um, has uh Dr.Franzblau been by?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 No, I haven't seen him.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Well, where is he? He is supposed to be here.  What if the babyneeds him?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Rachel, what is the deal with you and doctors, anyway? Was, like, yourfather a doctor? 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Yeah, why?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 No reason. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Mom, we've been through this. No, I'm not calling him. I don't care if itis his kid, the guy's a jerk. No, I'm not alone. Joey's here.  What do you mean,Joey who?  Joey who?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Tribbiani.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Joey Tribbiani. Yes, ok. Hold on.  She wants to talk to you.Take the phone.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	  Hi, yeah, it's me.  Oh, no no no, we're justfriends.  Yeah, I'm single.  25.  An actor.  Hello?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 She's not much of a phone person.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Yeah, so, uh, so, uh, what's the deal with this father guy, I mean, ifsomeone was havin' my baby somewhere, I'd wanna know about it, you know?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Hey, Knick fan, am I interested in your views on fatherhood? Uh, no. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Ok, look, maybe I should just go.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Maybe you should.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Good luck, and uh, take care, huh? 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 You know what the Celtics problem is? They let the players run the team.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Oh, that is so not true.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh, it is.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 It isn't.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 It is.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Isn't!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 You're gonna kill me!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 15 more seconds, 14, 13, 12...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Count faster.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 It's gonna be ok, just remember, we're doing this for Jordie. Just keepfocusing on Jordie.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Who the hell is Jordie?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Your son.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 No-no-no. I don't have a son named Jordie. We all agreed, my son's name isJamie.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Well, Jamie was the name of Susan's first girlfriend, so we went back toJordie.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 What? Whoa, whoa whoa whoa, what do you mean, back to Jordie? Wenever landed on Jordie. We just passed by it during the whole Jessy, Cody, Dylanfiasco.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Ow, ow, ow, ow, leg cramp, leg cramp, leg cramp.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I got it.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 I got it.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I got it! Hey, you get to sleep with her, I get the cramps.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 No, you don't.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 All right, that's it. I want both of you out.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Why?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 He started it!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 No, you started it.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 You did!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 I don't care. I am trying to get a person out of my body here, and you'renot making it any easier.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 But...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Now go!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  Thanks a lot.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	  See what you did.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  Yeah, listen...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Out! 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	 Breathe, breathe, breathe...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Oh, no.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Ew! What is that? Something exploded!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	 It's just her water breaking. Calm down, will you?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	  Water breaking, what do you mean? What's that, water breaking?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	  Breathe, breathe, breathe.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Please. This is so your fault.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 How, how is this my fault?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Look, Carol never threw me out of a room before you came along.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Yeah? Well, there's a lot of things Carol never did before I came along.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 You tryin' to be clever? A funny lady?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 You know what your problem is? You're threatened by me.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Oh, I'm threatened by you?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Yes.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Hey, hey, ok, all right, that's it! Get in here. Come on. My god, youguys, I don't believe you. There are children coming into the world in this very buildingand your negative fighting noises are not the first thing they should be hearing. So juststop all the yelling, just stop it!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Yeah, Susan.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Don't make me do this again, I don't like my voice like this.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Ok, who wants to hear something ironic?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	All	 Help!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 I'm having a baby in here! Ok, everyone stand back.  Ow.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Are they here yet?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 No, honey, they're not, but don't worry, because we are going to findthem, and until we do, we are all here for you, ok?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Ok.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Ok?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Ok.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	  Ok, so anyway, you were telling me about Paris, itsounds fascinating.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 It really was. There was this great little pastry shop right bymy hotel. There you go, dear. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Come on, Lydia, you can do it. Push! Push 'em out, push 'em out, harder,harder. Push 'em out, push 'em out, way out! Let's get that ball and really move, hey,hey, ho, ho. Let's  I wasjustyeah, right. Push! Push! 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 What're you gonna do, suck the door open?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Help! Help!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	  They found their bodies the very next day, they found theirbodies the very next... la la la la la la.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan, Ross	  Help!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Now, Mom, everything's going fine, really.  Yeah, Ross isgreat. He's uh, he's in a whole other place.  No, he's gone.  No no, youdon't have to fly back, really.  What do you mean this might be your only chance? Would you stop? I'm only 26, I'm not even thinking about babies yet. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Where have you been?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Oh, just had a baby.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Mazel tov!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 I don't know, could be an hour, could be three, but relax, she'sdoing great. So, uh, tell me, are you currently involved with anyone?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	  No, no, not at the moment, no, I'm not. Are you?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 No, it's hard enough to get women to go out with me.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Right, yeah, I've heard that about cute doctors.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 No, no, really. I suppose it's because I spend so much time, youknow, where I do.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Oh.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 I try not to let my work affect my personal life, but it's hard,when you... do what I do. It's like uh...Well, for instance, what do you do?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 I'm a waitress.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 Ok, all right, well aren't there times when you come home at theend of the day, and you're just like, 'if I see one more cup of coffee'...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	  Yeah. Gotcha.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 I'm gonna go check up on your friend.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Ok. That's fine. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 So how did you know I was even here?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Guy	 Your mom called me. So is this her?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 No, this is a loaner.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Guy	 I'm sorry you had to do this by yourself.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 I wasn't by myself. I had a doctor, a nurse, and a helper guy.  So, did you see who won the game?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Guy	 Yeah, the Knicks by 10. They suck.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Lydia	 Yeah, they're not so bad.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Come on, come on. Damnit, damnit, damnit, damnit.  This is allyour fault. This is supposed to be, like, the greatest day of my life, y'know? My son isbeing born, and I should be in there, you know, instead of stuck in a closet with you.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 The woman I love is having a baby today. I've been waiting for this justas much as you have.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 No no no, believe me. No one has been waiting for this as much as I have,ok? And you know what the funny thing is? When this day is over, you get to go home withthe baby, ok? Where does that leave me?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 You get to be the baby's father. Everyone knows who you are. Who am I?There's Mother's Day, there's Father's Day, there's no... Lesbian Lover Day.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Every day is Lesbian Lover Day.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 This is so great.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 You wanna explain that?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 I mean, well, 'cause when I was growing up, you know my dad left, and mymother died, and my stepfather went to jail, so I barely had enough pieces of parents tomake one whole one. And here's this little baby who has like three whole parents who careabout it so much that they're fighting over who gets to love it the most. And it's noteven born yet. It's just, it's just the luckiest baby in the whole world.  I'msorry, you were fighting.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Where are they?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 I'm sure they'll be here soon.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Yeah, honey, they wouldn't miss this.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Relax. You're only at nine centimeters. And the baby's at zero station.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	  You are really frightening me.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 Somebody wanna help me, tryin' to rip out my heart.  Uh, that's great.  Anybody seen a nipple?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 All right, ten centimeters, here we go.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	 All right, honey, time to start pushing.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 But they're not here yet!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 I'm sorry, I can't tell the baby to wait for them.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Oh, god.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Ok, got the vent open.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	  Hi, I'm Ben. I'm hospital workerBen. It's Ben... to the rescue!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Ben, you ready? All right, gimme your foot. Ok, on three, Ben. One, two,three. Ok, That's it, Ben.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 What do you see?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Well, Susan, I see what appears to be a dark vent. Wait. Yes, it is infact a dark vent.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Phoebs, It's open! It's open!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Janitor	  Wait! You forgot your legs!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	All	 Push, push!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 We're here!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	  Where have you been?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Long story, honey.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 All right, Carol, I need you to keep pushing. Ineed Excuse me, could I havethis?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	 All right, all right, there's a few too many people in this room, andthere's about to be one more, so anybody who's not an ex-husband or a lesbian lifepartner, out you go!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	All	 Good luck!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	  Let me ask you, do you have to be Carol's lesbian lifepartner?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Nurse	 Out!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 All right, he's crowning. Here he comes.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Let me see, I gotta see, I gotta see. Oh, a head. Oh, it's, it's huge.Carol, how are you doing this?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	  Not.... helping!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Dr. Franzblau	 You're doing great, you're doing fine. 
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  Hello!  Oh, sorry.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 What do you see? What do you see?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 We got a head, we got shoulders, we got arms, we got, oh, look at thelittle fingers, oh, and a chest, and a stomach. It's a boy, definitely a boy! All right!Ok, legs, knees, and feet. Oh, oh. He's here. He's a person.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Oh, look at that.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 What does he look like?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Kinda like my uncle Ed, covered in Jell-o.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Really?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	  You guys, he's beautiful!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Oh, thanks, Pheebs!
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 No shouting, but we still need a name for this little guy.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  How 'bout Ben?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 I like Ben.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Carol	 Ben. Ben. Ben's good. How come you never mentioned Ben before?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 We uh, we just cooked it up.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 That's what we were off doing.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Hi.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Hey.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Can we come in?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	  I know, I know. Everybody, there's someone I'd like you to meet.Yeah. This is Ben. Ben, this is everybody.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Susan, he looks just like you.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Susan	 Thanks.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 I know, I still am one of these.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 Ross, can I?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 The head, the head. You gotta...
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	  Hi, Ben. Hi. I'm your Aunt Monica. Yes I am. I'myour Aunt Monica. I...I will always have gum.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 Ben, I want you to know that there may be some times when I may not bearound, like this.  But I'll still always come back, like this. And sometimes I may be away longer, like this.  But I'll stillalways come back, like this.  
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Chandler	 And sometimes, I'll want you to steal third, and I'll go like this.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Monica	 He is so amazing.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 Oh, I know. Look at him.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 Ben, Ben, hey Ben. Nothing. I don't think that's his name.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Oh, look, look, he's closing his eyes.  Look, he'sopening his eyes.  
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Joey	 He doesn't do much, does he?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 No, this is pretty much it.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Rachel	 You guys wanna get some coffee?
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	All	 Yeah.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Ross	 All right, I'll see you guys later.
01	23	0123	The One With The Birth	Phoebe	 Oh, look, he's closing his eyes again.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 And here's little Ben nodding off...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Awww, look at Aunt Monica's little boy!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, look, he's got Ross's haircut!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, let me see!  Oh, God, is he just the sweetest thing?You must just want to kiss him all over!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	  That would be nice.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Pardon?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Nothing, just a little extra air in my mouth. Pffft. Pffffffft. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Hey, Chan, can you help me out here? I promise I'll pay you back.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, right, OK... inlcuding the waffles last week, you now oweme... 17 jillion dollars.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 I will, really. I'll pay you back this time.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 ... And where's this money coming from? 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Well... I'm helping out down at the N.Y.U. Med School with some...research.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	  What kind of research?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Oh, just, y'know.... science.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Science. Yeah, I think I've heard of that. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 ... It's a fertility study.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh, Joey, please tell me you're only donating your time.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Alright, come on you guys, it's not that big a deal. Really... I mean, Ijust go down there every other day and... make my contribution to the project. Hey, hey,but at the end of two weeks, I get seven hundred dollars.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Hey.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Wow, ooh, you're gonna be making money hand over fist!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 OK, we got the cole slaw, we got the buns...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 We've got the ground-up flesh of formerly cute cows and turkeys, ew...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  Men are here.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 We make fire. Cook meat.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Then put out fire by peeing, no get invited back.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica, Phoebe	 Ewww!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh Joey, Melanie called, said she's gonna be late.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Oh, OK.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 So how are things going with you two? Is she becoming your special someone?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 I don't know, she's, uh.... she's pretty great.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Yeah? What does she think of your little science project?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 What, you think I'm gonna tell a girl I like that I'm also seeing a cup?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Man's got a point.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Well, the tough thing is, she really wants to have sex with me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Crazy bitch.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Yeah, well, I still got a week left to go in the program, and according tothe rules, if I want to get the money I'm not allowed to conduct any... ersonalexperiments, if you know what I mean.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Joey... we always know what you mean.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Hey.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Hey.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Hey. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 How long did you think this barbecue was gonna last?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 I'm going to China. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Jeez, you say one thing, and...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 You're going to China?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Yeah, i-it's for the museum. Someone found a bone, we want the bone, butthey don't want us to have the bone, so I'm going over there to try to persuade them togive us the boit'sit's a whole big bone thing. Anyway, I'm gonna be gone forlike, uh... like a week, so, uh, if you wanna reach me, y-you can't. So here's myitinerary . Um... here's a picture of me... 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, let me see! 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 : Could you take it to Carol's every now and then, and show itto Ben, just so he doesn't forget me?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Yeah.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Hi, Ben. I'm your father. I am... the head. Aaaaaahhhh....  Alright, this barbecue is gonna be very fun.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Hey, is Rachel here? Um, I wanted to wish her a happy birthday before Ileft.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh no, she's out having drinks with Carl.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Oh.  Hey, who's Carl?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 You know, that guy she met at the coffeehouse.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 No.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, well, see, there's this guy she met at the...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 At the coffeehouse, right.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 So you do know who he is!  Sorry.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 OK, I'm gonna go say goodbye to the guys.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, hey, y'know what? Tell them that bone story.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Hi.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Hey!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Hey!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 ....I have to go to China.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 The country?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 No no, this big pile of dishes in my mom's breakfront. Do you guys knowwho Carl is?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Uh, let's see... Alvin... Simon... Theodore.... no.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Well, Rachel's having drinks with him tonight.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Oh no! How can she do that when she's never shown any interest in you?!?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Forget about her.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 He's right, man. Please. Move on. Go to China. Eat Chinese food.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Course there, they just call it food.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Yeah... I guess. I don'tI don't know. Alright, just... just give herthis for me, OK? 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Listen, buddy, we're just looking out for you.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 I know.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 We want you to be happy. And I may only have a couple beers in me, but...I love you, man. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 I'm still on my first. I just think you're nice.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 Anyway, that's when me and my friends started this whole fruit basketbusiness. We call ourselves 'The Three Basketeers.'
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Like the three musketeers, only with fruit.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  Ooooh. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	  OK, how does everybody like their burgers?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, no, no, no. Presents first. Food later. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Hey, hold on there, tiger. How's it going? How you holding up?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Well, not so good. She definitely thinks tonight is the night we'regonna... complete the transaction, if you know what I...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Then you do. Heh, heh.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 So, uh, have you ever thought about being there for her?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 What do you mean?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Y'know, just be there for her.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Not following you.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Think about it.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 OK, I'm guessing this is from...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Well, thank you, Melanie.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  OK, this one right here is from me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	  OK... ah, it's light... ...it rattles...it's...  Travel Scrabble! Oooohhh, thank you! 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 This one's from Joey... feels like a book. Thinks it's a book... feelslike a book. And......it's a book!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, it's Dr. Seuss!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 : That book got me through some tough times.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 There is a little child inside this man!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Yes, the doctors say if they remove it, he'll die.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Who's this from?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, that's Ross's. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh... ...  Oh my God. He remembered.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Remembered what?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I sawthis pin in the window, and I told him it was just like one my grandmother had when I wasa little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Well, sure, but can you play it on a plane? 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, it's so pretty. This must have cost him a fortune.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 I can't believe he did this.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love withCarol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 What did you just say?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  ahem... um... Crystal duck.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No, no, no.... the, um, the... 'love' part?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  F-hah.... flennin....
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh.... my God.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  Oh, no-no-no-no-no....
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	  That's good, just keep rubbing your head.That'll turn back time.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I mean, this is unbelievable.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 I know. This is really, really huge.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 No it's not. It's small. It's tiny. It's petite. It's wee.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Nuh-uh. I don't think any of our lives are ever gonna be the same everagain.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 OK, is there a mute button on this woman?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 I think this is so great! I mean, you and Ross! D-did you have any idea?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No! None! I mean, my first night in the city, he mentioned somethingabout asking me out, but nothing ever happened, so I just... : W-well, what elsedid he say? I mean, does he, like, want to go out with me?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Well, given that he's desperately in love with you, he probably wouldn'tmind getting a cup of coffee or something.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Ross? All this time? Well, I've got to talk to him. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  H-He's in China!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 The country.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 No, no, wait.  His flight doesn't leave foranother forty-five more minutes.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 What about the time difference?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 From here to the airport?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Yes!  You're never gonna make it!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Rachel, what're you gonna say to him?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I-I-I don't know.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Well then maybe you shouldn't go. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 He's right, cause if you're just gonna, like, break his heart, that's thekind of thing that can wait.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Yeah, but if it's good news, you should tell him now.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know. Maybe I'll know when I see him.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Here, look, alright, does this help?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Noooo... look, all I know is that I cannot wait a week until I see him.I mean, this is just too big. Y'know, I just, I've just gotta talk to him. I... I gotta...OK, I'll see you later. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Rachel, I love you! Deal with me first! 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 Alright!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Ni-chou chi-ma! 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Ross! Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me....
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 Hi!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Hi.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 May I see your boarding pass?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, no, no, I don't have one. I just need to talk to my friend.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 Oh, oooh. I'm sorry. You are not allowed on the jetway unlessyou have a boarding pass.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No, I know, but Ihe just went on. He's right there, he's got theblue jacket on, I... can I j-just...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 No no no! Federal regulations!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 OK, alright, OK, um... then could you please, uh... just give him amessage for me? Please? This is very important.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 Alright. What's the message?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Uh... I don't know.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 Sir? Sir? Excuse me, sir? Uh... I have a message for you.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Man	  What?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Flight Attendant	 It's from Rachel. She said that she loved the present, and shewill see you when you get back.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Man	 : Toby... Oh, for God's sake, I don't know what she's talkingabout! There's no Rachel! Don't give me that deep freeze.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 Mmmmmm... Oh, Joey, Joey, Joey... I think I blacked out there for aminute!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Heh, heh. It was nothin'.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 Well, now we've gotta find something fun for you! 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	  Uhhh.. y'know what? Forget about me. Let's, uh... let's giveyou another turn.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	  M-Me again?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Sure! Why not?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 Boy, somebody's gonna get a big fruit basket tomorrow.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 Oooh, I gotta tell you... you are nothing like I thought you would be.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 How do you mean?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Melanie	 I don't know, I-I guess I just had you pegged as one of those guyswho're always 'me, me, me.' But you... you're a giver. You're like the most generous man Iever met. I mean... you're practically a woman.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Uh, so, uh, Rach, uh... do you wanna save this wrapping paper, I mean,it's only a little bit torn... so are you gonna go for it with Ross or should I just throwit out?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know. I don't know... I thought about it all the way there, andI thought about it all the way back... and, uh, oh, you guys, y'know, it's Ross.Y'know what I mean? I mean, it's Ross.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica, Phoebe	 Sure.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know, I mean, this is just my initial gut feeling... but I'mthinking... oh, I'm thinking it'd be really great.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh my God, me too! Oh! Oh, we'd be like friends-in-law! Y'know what thebest part is? The best part is that you already know everything about him! I mean, it'slike starting on the fifteenth date!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Yeah, but, y'know, it's... it would be like starting on the fifteenthdate.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Another good point.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, I mean, I mean, when you're at the fifteenth date, y'know, you'realready in a very relationshippy place. Y'know, it's... you're committed.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	  Huh?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well, I mean, then what happens if it doesn't work out?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Why isn't it working out?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know... sometimes it doesn't.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Is he not cute enough for you?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Does he not make enough money?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No, I'm just....
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Phoebe	 Maybe there's someone else.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Wha...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Is there? Is there someone else?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 No! There is.. there is noone else!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Then why the hell are you dumping my brother?!?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Hey, big...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Shhhh!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	  ...spender.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 She's still asleep.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 So how'd it go?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Oh, it was amazing. You know how you always think you're great in bed?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 The fact that you'd even ask that question shows how little you knowme.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Well, it's like, last night, I couldn't do the thing that usually makes megreat. So I had to do all this other stuff. And the response I got... man, oh man, it waslike a ticker tape parade!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Yes, I know, as it happens my room is very very close to the paraderoute.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 It was amazing! And not just for her... uh-uh. For me, too. It's like, allof a sudden, I'm blind. But all my other senses are heightened, y'know? It's like... I wasable to appreciate it on another level.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 I didn't know you had another level.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 I know! Neither did I!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Hey, great skirt! Birthday present?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh, from who?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 From you. I exchanged the blouse you got me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Well, it's the thought. Hey, doesn't Ross's flight get in in a couplehours? At gate 27-B?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Uh, yeah. Uh, Monica, y'know, honey, I've been thinking about it andI've decided thisthis whole Ross thing, it's just not a good idea.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Oh, why?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Because, I feel like I wouldn't just be going out with him. I would begoing out with all of you. Oh, and there would just be all this pressure, and I don'twanna...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	  No, no, no, no, no, no pressure, no pressure!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Monica, nothing has even happened yet, and you're already so...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 I am not 'so'! OK, I was a teensy bit weird at first, but... I'll begood. I promise.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Who is it?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Intercom	 It's me, Carl.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 C'mon up.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Monica	 Behind my brother's back?  ... is exactly the kindof crazy thing you won't be hearing from me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Seven hundred bucks!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Alright, you did it! Do we have any fruit?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 Man, hell of a two weeks, huh? Y'know what, though? I really feel like Ilearned something.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Chandler	 Really? So, you're gonna stick with this 'it's all for her' thing?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Joey	 What, are you crazy? When a blind man gets his sight back, does he walkaround like this? 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 I'm just sayin', if I see one more picture of Ed Begley, Jr. in that stupidelectric car, I'm gonna shoot myself! I mean, don't get me wrong... I'm not againstenvironmental issues per se.... it's just that guy!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 I can't believe you'd rather go out with him than me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Would you excuse me, please? I'm trying to have a date here.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Fine, just stop thinking about me.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Can't do it, can you?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 So I'm thinking about you. So what?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 I don't get it. What do you see in this guy, anyway?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Well... he happens to be a very nice... guy....
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 I mean, come on, buddy, get a real car!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Rachel, come on. Give us a chance.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Ross, it's too hard.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 No, no, no... why, because it might get weird for everyone else? Who caresabout them. This is about us. Look, I-I've been in love with you since, like, the ninthgrade. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Ross, you're like my best friend.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 I know.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 If we broke up, and I lost you...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What makes you think we're gonna break up?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Well, have you been involved with someone where you haven't broken up?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	  No. But... it only has to happen once. Look, you and I bothknow we are perfect for each other, right? I mean... so, the only question is... are youattracted to me?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know... I mean, I've never looked at you that way before.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Well, start looking. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Wow.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 Exactly! And you just know I'm gonna be the guy caught behind thishammerhead in traffic!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 Right! You're right!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 Heh... y'know?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 You know what?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 What?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	 I forgot... I am supposed to pick up a friend at the airport. I am sosorry! I'm so... if you want to stay, and finish your drinks, please do....  I meanI'm sorry. I-I-I gotta go. I'm sorry. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Carl	 But...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Rachel	  Excuse me, pardon me, excuse me, excuse me,sorry. Hi.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Man	 For God's sake, will you let it go? There's no Rachel!
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Oh, hey, hey, I got that.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Julie	 Oh, thanks, sweetie.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 No problem. I cannot wait for you to meet my friends.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Julie	 Really?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Yeah. 
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Julie	 You don't think they'll judge and ridicule me?
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 No, no, they will. I just... uh...
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross, Julie	 Can't wait.
01	24	0124	The One Where Rachel Finds Out	Ross	 Come on, they're gonna love you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Ok, so this is pretty much what's happened so far. Ross was in love withRachel since, you know, forever, but every time he tried to tell her, something kind ofgot in the way, like cats, and Italian guys. Finally Chandler was like "forget abouther" but when Ross was in China on his dig, Chandler let it slip that Ross was inlove with Rachel. She was like, "Oh my god." So she went to the airport to meethim when he came back, but what she didn't know was, that Ross was getting off the planewith another woman. Uh-Oh! So, that's pretty much everything you need to know. But, enoughabout us. So, how've you been?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Oh my god. Oh my god.  Excuse me.Move! Move! Emergency! Excuse me!  
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Rach!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Oh, there you are! Hi! Oh, so, so, how was China, you? 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 It was, it was great. Oh, what happened?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 What?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 You're bleeding. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I am? Oh, look at that, yes I am. Enough about me, enough about me, Mr.Back from the Orient. Come on. I wanna hear everything! Everything. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well, where do I start? This is Julie. Julie, this is Rachel.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 These are, these aren't for you.  These are for you.  Welcome to our country.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	  Thank you. I'm from New York.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Ok, well, not a problem. We'll just use them to stop the bleeding. Ok.Baggage claim? Ok.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  No way!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 I'm telling you, she went to the airport, and she's gonna go for it withRoss! 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh my god. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, allright, what's bigger than huge?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Um, this?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Yes.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Guys, you got your hair cut.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Yes, yes, we did, thanks to Vidal Buffay.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 'Cause, you know,  if you don't look good, we don't lookgood. I love that voice.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Airport, airport. Ross, not alone, Julie, armaround her. Cramp, cramp.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Ok, I think she's trying to tell us something. Quick, get the verbs.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  You, you, you said he liked me. You, you slowpokes!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 That's all right, Rach, we got the bags. Hi, hello. Julie, this is mysister Monica. This is Chandler.  Phoebe.  Joey, what up?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 What up?!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Everyone, this is Julie.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Julie.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	All	 Ohh.  Hi!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 Hi, but I'm not here, you haven't met me. I'll make a much better firstimpression tomorrow when I don't have 20 hours of cab and plane on me.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 And bus.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 Oh my god.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  The screaming guy?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	  And the spitting?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 You gotta hear this story.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 We're on this bus, that's easily 200 years old...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 200 at least.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	  ...and this guy...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 And the chicken pooped in her lap. Oh, I'm so sorry. I just gave awaythe ending, didn't I? Oh! It's just, I just heard this story in the cab, and it is all Ican think about.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 This is amazing. I mean, how, how did this happen?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 Well, Ross and I were in grad school together.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guesswho's in charge of the dig. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that justkick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	  It's an expression.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well, we just wanted to say a quick hi, and then we're gonna go see thebaby.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 And then we've gotta get some sleep.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Yeah, it's really 6:00 tomorrow night our time.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Well, listen, don't tell us what's gonna happen though, 'cause I liketo be surprised.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Bye. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Hey, Rach, can I get some coffee?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah, sure.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Thank you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey, Rach, can I get...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Did you talk to him?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Not yet.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Then, no.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 So what the hell happened to you in China? I mean, when last we leftyou, you were totally in love with, you know.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 I know, I know I was, but there was always this little voice inside thatkept saying it's never gonna happen, move on. You know whose voice that was?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 God?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 It was you, pal.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Well, maybe it was God, doing me.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Look, you were right. She looks at me and sees a friend, that's all. Butthen I met Julie, and I don't know, we're havin' a great time. And I have to say, I neverwould've gone for it with her if it hadn't been for you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Well, you owe me one, big guy.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Here's your lemonade.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 I didn't order lemonade.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Oh. Well then, you better go take that back because they're gonna chargeyou for that. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 But...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Go-go-go-go, come on!   Souh, what did you find out?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 He said...he said, he said that they're having a great time. I'msorry. But, the silver lining, if you wanna see it, is that he made the decision all byhimself!  Without any outside help whatsoever.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 How is that the silver lining?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 You have to really wanna see it.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Ironically, these are the guys who were picked last in gym.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Pheebes, you know what I'm thinking?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh, ok. How, it's been so long since you've had sex, you're wondering ifthey've changed it?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 No, although now that's what I'm thinking.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 All right, so what were you thinking?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Well, I was thinking, that you gave the guys such great haircuts, Ithought, maybe you'd like to do mine?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Ohh! No.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Why not?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Because, I'm just, I'm incredibly anal and an unbelievable controlfreak.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 No you're not.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 I know I'm not, but you are, and I was trying to spare your feelings.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	  Hello? Oh, hi. Yeah, hold on a second. Ross, it'sJulie, for you. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hello? Hi.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  Hi. Anybody know a good tailor?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Needs some clothes altered?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 No, no, I'm just looking for a man to draw on me with chalk.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Why don't you go see Frankie? My family's been goin' to him forever. Hedid my first suit when I was 15. No wait, 16. No, 'scuse me, 15.  Allright, when was 1990?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Okay.  You have to stop the Q-tip when there's resistance!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Ok, ok, sweetheart, I'll see you later. Ok, bye. What?  Oh, that is so sweet. No, no, ok, you hang up. Ok, ok, one, two,three.  Well you didn't hang upeither. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 She didn't hang up either!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Sorry, I thought you were talkingto me.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Rachel! I'll just call her back. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Okay!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hi?  Sorry, we got disconnected... 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? How did this happento me? A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. Ross was just Ross, just this guy. Now he'sRrrooossss, oh, this really great guy that I can't have.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Sweetie, I wanted you to have him too.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I know you did. I'm just gonna deal with it, I'm just gonna deal withit.  I gotta get out of here. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Ok, I don't care what you guys say, something's bothering her.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	  You know, I think I was sixteen.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	  Please, just a little bit off the back.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 I'm still on "no."
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Uh, morning. Do you guys think youcould close your eyes for just a sec?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no,  I'm not fallin' for that again.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 What's goin' on?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Well, I sorta did a stupid thing last night.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 What stupid thing did you do?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Paulo	  Bon giorno tutti!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Ewww! 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Ok, Paulo, why don't you just go get dressed, and then you be on yourway, ok, bye-bye. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Rachel, how did this happen?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I don't know, I just kinda ran into him last night.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Where?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 At his apartment. Is this juice?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Whoa, whoa. And the fact that you dumped him because he hit on Phoebe?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Oh God, I know I'm a pathetic loser.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Honey, you're not pathetic, you're sad.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 People do stupid things when they're upset.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 My god, if I had a nickel for every guy I wish I hadn't..., but this is about your horrible mistake.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	All	 Hi!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Hi. Sorry we're late but we werewell, there was touching.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Paulo	  Hey, hey Ross.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Hey, Paulo. What are you doing here?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Paulo	 I do Raquel.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  So, uh, he's back.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah, he's back. Is that a problem?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 No, not a problem.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Good! I'm glad it's not a problem.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Ok, you're gonna have to not touch my ass.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Well, in spite of the yummy bagels and palpable tension, I've gotpants that need to be altered.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey, Chandler, when you see Frankie, tell him Joey Tribbiani says hello.He'll know what it means.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Are you sure he's gonna be able to crack that code?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	  You know it's funny, the last time Paulo was here, my hairwas so much shorter and cuter.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 All right. Ok, but, but!  You have to promise that you will not beall like control-y and bossy and Monica about it.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 I promise.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 All right.  Now some of you are gonna getcut, and some of you aren't. But I promise none of you are gonna feel a thing.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 All right, that's it, I quit.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 What? I didn't say anything.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Yeah, but this  isn't the face of a person whotrusts a person. Ok, this  is the face of a person who, you know,doesn't trust a person.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Phoebe. It's just a little shorter than what wehad discussed.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Would you relax? I know what I am doing. This is how he wears it.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 How who wears it?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Demi Moore.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Demi Moore is not a he.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Well, he was a he in Arthur, and in Ten.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 That's Dudley Moore. I said I wanted it like Demi Moore.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh.  Oh!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Oh my God!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Oh my God!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 She's the actress that was in Disclosure, IndecentProposal, Ghost!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 I know!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Frankie	 How long do you want the cuffs?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 At least as long as I have the pants.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Frankie	 I just got that. Ok, now we'll do your inseam.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 How is she?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 It's too soon to tell. She's resting, which is a good sign.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 How's the hair?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 I'm not gonna lie to you, Ross, it doesn't look good. I put a clip onone side, which seems to have stopped the curling.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Can we see her?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Your hair looks too good, I think it would upset her. Ross, why don'tyou come on in. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Yeah. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 How're you doing?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I'm okay.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Ooh, that bad, huh? 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 What?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Look, I can sense when women are depressed and vulnerable. It'sone of my gifts.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rockbottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, 50 feet of crap, then me.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 You gotta tell Ross how you feel.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Come on. How can I just tell him? What about Julie?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 What about her? They've only been going out for two weeks. Ross has beenin love with you for like 10 years.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I don't know, I don't know.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Look, Rach, Rach! I've been with my share of women. In fact, I've beenwith like a lot of people's share of women. The point is, I've never felt about anyone theway Ross felt about you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  Yo, paisan! Can I talk to you for a sec? Your tailor is a very bad man!
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Frankie? What're you talking about?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hey, what's goin' on? 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Joey's tailor...took advantage of me.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 What?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 No way. I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh come on! He said he was going to do my inseam, and he ran his handup my leg, and then, there was definite...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 What?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Cupping.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 That's how they do pants! First they go up one side, they move it over,then they go up the other side, they move it back, and then they do the rear.  What? Ross, Ross, would you tell him? Isn't that how they measurepants?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Yes, yes it is. In prison! Whatsa matter with you?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 What? That's not?  Oh my God.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Even Mary Tyler Moore would've been better.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Thank you. My hair is very amused.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Come on, Monica, things could be worse. You could get caught betweenthe moon and New York City. I know it's crazy, but it's true.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Thank you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well, I gotta go. Bye. Bye, Rach.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Wait, are you leaving?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Yeah, that's kinda what I meant by "bye!"
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Well, can I talk to you for a sec? 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Okay. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey, when the doctor does that hernia test...
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 That's ok.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 What's goin' on?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Well, first of all, Paulo and I are not back together. It was just astupid thing I did, and if I could go back in time and do it again, well, I wouldn't. Um,second of all , what?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Ok. Well, before I say anything, I just need to know, is this one of thosethings where you break up with a guy, and then I tell you what I think, and then the nextday you get back together with the guy, and I look like a complete idiot?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 No. No-no-no-no.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well, then, I think, I think the guy is scum. I hate him. I mean IactuallyI-I physically hate him. I always have. You are way too good to be with aguy like that. 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Really?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 You deserve to be with someone who appreciates you, and who getshow funny and sweet and amazing, and adorable, and sexy you are, you know? Someone whowakes up every morning thinking "Oh my god, I'm with Rachel". You know, someonewho makes you feel good, the way I am with Julie.  Was there a second of all?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 No, I think that was the whole all.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Okay.  Okay.  Okay.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Joey	 I swear to god, Dad. That's not how they measure pants.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 I was thinking of doing it a little shorter, you know, like AndieMcDowell's new haircut?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh yeah!  Oh, I can do that.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 Really?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 You wanna do it right now?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Julie	 Great! 
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Ok, I just wanna be really sure this time. Andie McDowell'sthe girl from Four Weddings and a Funeral, right?
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 No. No no no no no. That's Rodney McDowell. Andie McDowell is the guyfrom Planet of the Apes.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah. Ok, thank you.
02	01	0201	The One With Ross's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 You're welcome.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	  Ok, these wereunbelievably expensive, and I know he's gonna grow out of them in like, 20 minutes, but Icouldn't resist. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Oh, look at these! Hey, Ben. Just do it.  Oh my God,oh, ok, was that too much pressure for him?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 Oh, is he hungry already?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 I guess so. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 You know, it's... something funny about sneakers. I'll be right back. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	  I gotta get one, too.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  What are you guys doing?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 We're just hanging out by the spoons. Ladle?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing inthe world.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 This is my son having lunch, ok? It's gonna happen a lot, so you'd betterget used to it. Now if you have any problem with it, if you're uncomfortable, just askquestions. Carol's fine with it, now come on.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Carol?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question aboutbreast-feeding?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 Sure.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Uh, does it hurt?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 It did at first, but not anymore.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Chandler?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 So, uh, how often can you do it?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 As much as he needs.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Ok, I got one, I got one. Uh, if he blows into one, does the other one getbigger?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Rachel, do you have any muffins left?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Yeah, I forget which ones.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Oh, you're busy, that's ok, I'll get it. Anybody else want one? 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	All	 No thanks.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	  Oh, you're losin' your apron here, let me get it. There yougo. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	  Thank you.  What a bitch.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Oh, listen you guys. I have this friend at Bloomingdale's who'squitting tomorrow and he wants to abuse his discount. So, anyone want to come with me andtake advantage of it?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 I can't, I have to take my grandmother to the vet.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Ok, um, I'll go with you. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Great.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  Hi, honey.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Hey, sweetums.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Hello to the rest.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	All	  Hi!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Monica what're you doin'? You can't go shopping with her? What aboutRachel?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 It's gonna be a problem, isn't it?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Come on, you're going to Bloomingdale's with Julie? That'slike cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 But I'm...
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Monica, she will kill you. She will kill you like a dog in the street.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  So, uh, Jules tells me you guys are going shopping tomorrow?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Yeah, uh, it's actually not that big a deal.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 It's a big deal to me. This is great, Monica. I really appreciate this.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 You're welcome.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Woof, woof. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	  Bijan for men?  Bijan for men? Bijan for men?  HeyAnnabelle.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 Hey, Joey. So did you hear about the new guy?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Who?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 Nobody knows his name. Me and the girls just call him the Hombre man.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	  Hombre? 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 What's he doin' in my section?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 I guess he doesn't know.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Well, he's gonna. I'll see you a little later, ok? Hey, how ya doin'?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 Mornin'. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Listen, I know you're new, but it's kinda understood that everything fromYoung Men's to the escalator is my territory.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 Your territory, huh?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Yeah. Bijan for men?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Guy	 No thanks.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 Hombre?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Guy	 Yeah. All right. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	  You were saying?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Phoebe, listen. You were with me, and we were shopping all day.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 What?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 We were shopping, and we had lunch.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Oh, all right. What did I have?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 You had a salad.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Oh, no wonder I don't feel full.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	  Hey, guys, what's up.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 I went shopping with Monica all day, and I had a salad.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Good, Pheebs. What'd you buy?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Um, we went shopping for um, for, fur.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 You went shopping for fur?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Yes, and then I realized I'm against that, and uh, so then we boughtsome,  uh, boobs.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 You bought boobs?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	  Bras! We bought bras! We boughtbras. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	  Bijan for men?  Bijan for men?  Bijanfor...   Hey, Annabelle, Uh,listen, I was wondering if maybe after work you and I could go maybe grab a cup of coffee.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 Oh, actually I sorta have plans.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	  Ready, Annabelle?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 You bet.  Maybe some other time?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	  Hey, it's not the first time I lost a girl to a cowboyspraying cologne.  Bijan for men?  Bijan for men?! 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 Ok, and this is Funny Clown. Funny Clown is only for after his naps, notbefore his naps or he won't sleep.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Carol, we've been through this before, ok? We have a good time. We laugh,we play. It's like we're father and son.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 Honey, relax. Ross is great with him.  Don't look sosurprised. I'm a lovely person.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh, this is so cute.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 Oh, I got that for him.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 My mommies love me. That's clever.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Hello? Oh, Hi, JuHi, Jew!   Uh huh?  Uh huh?  Ok.  Um, sure,that'd be great. See ya then. Bye. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Did you just say Hi, Jew?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Yes. Uh, yes, I did. That was my friend, Eddie Moskowitz. Yeah, he likesit. Reaffirms his faith.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Ben, dinner!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Thanks Aunt Pheebs. Hey, you didn't microwave that, did you, because it'sbreast milk, and you're not supposed to do that.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Duh, I think I know how to heat breast milk. Ok. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 What did you just do?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 I licked my arm, what?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 It's breast milk.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 So?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from a person.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 What is the big deal? 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 What did you just do?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Ok, would people stop drinking the breast milk?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 You won't even taste it?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 No!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Not even if you just pretend that it's milk?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Not even if Carol's breast had a picture of a missing child on it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Hey, where is everybody?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 They took Ben to the park. Where've you been?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Just out. Had some lunch, just me, little quality time with me. Thanksfor your jacket.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh, no problem. You can borrow it, by the way.  Here are your keys, hon. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Okay.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53dollars?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 You know what probably happened? Someone musta stolen my credit card.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 And sorta just put the receipt back in your pocket?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 That is an excellent excellent question. That is excellent.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Monica, what is with you? Who'd you have lunch with?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Judy.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Who?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Julie.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 What?!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Jody!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 You were with Julie?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Look, when it started I was just trying to be nice to her because shewas my brother's girlfriend. And then, one thing led to another and, before I knew it, wewere...shopping.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh. Oh my God. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Honey, wait. We only did it once. It didn't mean anything to me.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Yeah, right.  Sure!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Really, Rachel, I was thinking of you the whole time. Look, I'm sorry,all right. I never meant for you to find out!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh, please, you wanted to get caught. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 That is not true!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Did it ever occur to you that I might just be that stupid?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Ok, Monica. I just have to know one thing. Did you go with her to Bloomingdale's? Oh! Ok, ok, ok, I just really, uh, I just really need to not be withyou right now. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	  Hi, who's this?  Hi, Joanne. Is Rachel working?It's Monica.  Yes, I know I did a horrible thing.  Joanne, it's not assimple as all that, ok?  No, I don't care what Steve thinks.  Hi, Steve.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol, Susan	 Hey! 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 How did we do?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Oh, I tasted Ben's milk, and Ross freaked out.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 I did not freak out. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 Why'd you freak out?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Because it's breast milk. It's gross.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 My breast milk is gross?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 This should be fun.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 No, no, Carol. There's nothing wrong with it. I just, I just don't thinkbreast milk is for adults.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Of course the packaging does appeal to grown-ups and kids alike.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Carol	 Ross, you're being silly. I've tried it, it's no big deal. Just taste it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  That would be no.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Come on. It doesn't taste bad.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Yeah, it's kinda sweet, sorta like, uh...
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 Cantaloupe juice.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Exactly.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  You've tasted it? You've tasted it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 Uh huh.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	 Oh, you've tasted it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Susan	 You can keep saying it, but it won't stop being true.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  Gimme the bottle.  Gimme the towel.  
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Howdy.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	  Gimme a box ajuice. Well, they switched me over to Hombre.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 Well, maybe it's because of the way you're dressed.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Or maybe it's because this guy's doing so good they wanna put more peopleon it.  You should see this guy, Chandler, he goesthrough two bottles a day.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	  What do youcare? You're an actor. This is your day job. This isn't supposed to mean anything to you.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 I know, but, I was the best, you know? I liked being the best.  I don't know. Maybe I should just get outta the game.They need guys up in housewares to serve cheese.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	  All right, say you do that.You know sooner or later somebody's gonna come along that slices a better cheddar. Andthen where're you gonna run?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Yeah I guess you're right.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 You're damn right I'm right. I say you show this guy what you're madeof. I say you stand your ground. I say you show him that you are the baddest hombre westof the lingerie.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 I'm gonna do it. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Chandler	 All right. Now go see Miss Kitty and she'll fix you up with a nicehooker.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 I don't know what else to say.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 I feel terrible, I really do.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Rachel,  say that I'm friends with her, we spendsome time together. Is that so terrible?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Yes.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 It's that terrible?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Yes. Monica, you don't get it. It's bad enough that she's stolen the guywho might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually, but now she's actually stealing you.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Me? What are you talking about? Nobody could steal me from you. I mean,just because I'm friends with her doesn't make me any less friends with you. I mean, you're my...We're, we're...Oh, I love you.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 I love you too. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 You guys, um I know that this really doesn't have anything to do withme, but um I love you guys too.  Oh, I really needed that. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	 Look, I know that you're in a place right now where you really need tohate Julie's guts, but she didn't do anything wrong. I mean, she was just a girl who met aguy, and now they go out. I really think that if you gave her a chance, you'd like her.Would you just give that a chance, for me?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	  I'd do anything for you, you know that.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Monica	  I'd do anything for you. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Phoebe	 Wait, wait, wait, wait! 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Mornin'.  I said, mornin'.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 I heard ya.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Store Guy	 All right, everybody, I'm openin' the doors. You boys ready?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 Ready.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 Yeah, I'm ready.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Customer	 You idiot, you stupid cowboy, you blinded me, I'm suing!
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Store Guy	 Oh my god, Todd! What the hell did you do?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Hombre Man	 I'm sorry. I am such a doofus. I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	  My god, what happened?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Joey	 These new kids, they never last. Sooner or later, they all...stop lastin'.Listen, uh, what do you say I buy you that cup of coffee now?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Annabelle	 Sure.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 So.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 So. I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. I mean, youknow, we've never really talked. I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us,though, right?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 I know, I probably shouldn't even tell you this, but I'm pretty muchtotally intimidated by you.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Really? Me?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Yes. Oh my god, are you kidding? Ross is so crazy about you, and I reallywanted you to like me, and, it's probably me being totally paranoid, but I kinda got thefeeling that maybe you don't.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Well, you're not totally paranoid.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Oy.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, itwas really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, butum, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um,Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Thanks. Hey, listen, would you like to go to a movie sometime orsomething?
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Yeah, that'd be great. I'd love it.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 I'd love it too. Shoot, I gotta go. So, I'll talk to you later.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 All right, Julie.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Julie	 Bye. 
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Rachel	 Bye.  What a manipulative bitch.
02	02	0202	The One With The Breast Milk	Ross	  That's not bad. 
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Hey.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 So how was Joan?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 I broke up with her. 
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 They were huge. When she sneezed, bats flew out of them.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Come on, they were not that huge.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 I'm tellin' you, she leaned back, I could see her brain.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 How many perfectly fine women are you gonna reject over the most superficialinsignificant things?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Hold it hold it. I gotta side with Chandler on this one. When I first moved tothe city, I went out a couple of times with this girl, really hot, great kisser, but shehad the biggest Adam's apple. It made me nuts.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 You or me?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 I got it. Uh, Joey, women don't have Adam's apples.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 You guys are messin' with me, right?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	All	 Yeah.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 That was a good one. For a second there, I was like, "whoa."
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 You name one woman that you broke up with for a real reason.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Maureen Rosilla.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Not hating Yanni is not a real reason.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Hello, Mr. Heckles.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Heckles	 You're doing it again.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 We're not doing anything.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Heckles	 You're stomping. It's disturbing my birds.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 You don't have birds.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Heckles	 I could have birds.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Ok, Mr. Heckles, we'll try to keep it down.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Heckles	 Thank you. I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 All right, bye-bye.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice. That wasn't about being picky.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 We'll give you Janice.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 "Oh, my, god."
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 "Oh, Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Stop with the broom, we're not making noise.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 We won. We won!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Mr. Heckles.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 How did this happen?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Treeger	 He musta been sweepin'. They found a broom in his hand.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 That's terrible.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Treeger	 I know. I was sweepin' yesterday. It coulda been me.ROSS: Sure, sweepin'.You never know.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Treeger	 You never know.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, it's very faint, but I can still sense him in the building. Go into thelight, Mr. Heckles!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Ok, Phoebe.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, but sometimes they need help. That's fine. Go ahead and scoff. Youknow, there're a lot of things that I don't believe in, but that doesn't mean they're nottrue.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Such as?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Like crop circles, or the Bermuda triangle, or evolution?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, whoa. What, you don't, uh, you don't believe in evolution?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Nah. Not really.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 You don't believe in evolution?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys, Darwin, you know, it's a, it's anice story, I just think it's a little too easy.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Too easy? Too...The process of every living thing on this planet evolving overmillions of years from single-celled organisms, too easy?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, I just don't buy it.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Uh, excuse me. Evolution is not for you to buy, Phoebe. Evolution is scientificfact, like, like, like the air we breathe, like gravity.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, don't get me started on gravity.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 You uh, you don't believe in gravity?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Well, it's not so much that you know, like I don't believe in it, you know,it's just...I don't know, lately I get the feeling that I'm not so much being pulled downas I am being pushed.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Uh-Oh. It's Isaac Newton, and he's pissed.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Treeger	 There she is. And over there, that's the other one. This is Mr. BuddyBoyle, Mr. Heckles' attorney. He'd like to talk to you.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 What can we do for you?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Boyle	 All right, kids. Here's the deal. According to my client's will, he wants toleave all his earthly possessions to "the noisy girls in the apartment abovemine".
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Well, what about his family?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Boyle	 He didn't have any.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Ok, so let's talk money.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Mr. Boyle	 All right, there was none. Let's talk signing. You be noisy girl number one,you be noisy girl number two.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us. I mean, isn't itamazing how much you can touch someone's life, without even knowing it?...Would you lookat this dump? He hated us. This is his final revenge!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Have you ever seen so much crap?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crap
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Check this out. Can I have this?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 How can you not believe in evolution?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Just don't. Look at this funky shirt!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Pheebs, I have studied evolution my entire adult life. Ok, I can tell you, wehave collected fossils from all over the world that actually show the evolution ofdifferent species, ok? You can literally see them evolving through time.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Really? You can actually see it?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 You bet. In the U.S., China, Africa, all over.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 See, I didn't know that.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Well, there you go.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Huh. So now, the real question is, who put those fossils there, and why?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Hey, look at this. "My Big Book of Grievances."
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Hey, there's me! April 17th. Excessive noise. Italian guy comes homes with adate. Hey Chandler, look, you're in here too.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 April 18th, excessive noise. Italian guy's gay roommate comes home with thedry-cleaning. Well that's excellent.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. Is this tacky or what? We have to have this.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Rache, I think we have enough regular lamps.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 What? Come on, it's not like I'm asking for this girly clock or anything,which, by the way, I also think is very cool.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 It doesn't go with any of my stuff.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Well, what about my stuff?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 You don't have any stuff.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 No.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Yes you do. You think of it as your apartment, and I'm just somebody who rentsa room.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Mmmmm.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Ok, while you "mmm" on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place formy new lamp.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Ok, Pheebs. See how I'm making these little toys move? Opposable thumbs. Withoutevolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Maybe the overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Please tell me you're joking.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Look, can't we just say that you believe in something, and I don't.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 No, no, Pheebs, we can't, ok, because--
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 What is this obsessive need you have to make everyone agree with you? No,what's that all about? I think, I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Is there blood coming out of my ears?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Check it out, check it out. Heckles' high school yearbook.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Wow, he looks so normal.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 He's even kind of cute.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 "Heckles, you crack me up in science class. You're the funniest kid inschool.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Funniest? Heckles? 
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 That's what it says.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Wow, Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I. He was right. Would youlisten to that?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 I'd call that excessive.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Whoa! 
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 What?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Heckles played clarinet in band, and I played clarinet. And he was in thescale modeler's club, and I was, well, there was no club, but I sure thought they werecool.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 So, you were both dorks. Big deal.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me, Heckles, and me, me andHeckles...Would you knock it off?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Have you been here all night?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Look at this. Pictures of all the women that Heckles went out with. Look whathe wrote on them. Vivian, too tall. Madge, big gums. Too loud, too smart, makes noise whenshe eats. This is, this is me. This is what I do. I'm gonna end up alone, just like hedid.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Chandler, Heckles was a nut case.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Our trains are on the same track, ok? Yeah, sure, I'm coming up 30 yearsbehind him, but the stops are all the same. Bitter Town. Aloneville. Hermit Junction.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 All right, you know what we gotta do? We gotta get you outta here. Come on, I'llbuy you breakfast, let's go.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 What if I never find someone? Or worse, what if I've found her, but I dumpedher because she pronounced it "supposably"?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Chandler, come on, you're gonna find somebody.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 How do you know that? How?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 I don't know, I'm just tryin' to help you out.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 You'll see, you guys are all gonna go off and get married, and I'm gonna endup alone. Will you promise me something? When you're married, will you invite me over forholidays?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're gonna be doin'. I mean, what if we'reat her folks' place?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, I understand.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 You can come over and watch the Super Bowl. Every year, all right?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this. I'll see you man.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Supposably. Supposably. Did they go to the zoo? Supposably.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	  Hi, it's me.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Oh, my, god.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Janice? You called Janice?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Yes, Janice. Why is that so difficult for you to comprehend?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 You remember Janice, right?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Yes. She was smart, she was pretty, and she honestly cared about me. Janiceis my last chance to have somebody.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Helloo!!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Oh, my, god!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Geez, look how fat she got.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Hey, it's everybody.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Janice, you're--
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Yes, I am.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Is it--?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Is it yours? Ha! You wish, Chandler Bing. You are looking at a married ladynow.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Congratulations.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Janice	 And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 What?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Hide the Lamp.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Monica, let it go.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Well, then, you'll just have to eat the other lamps.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Uh-oh. It's Scary Scientist Man.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 Ok, Phoebe, this is it. In this briefcase I carry actual scientific facts. Abriefcase of facts, if you will. Some of these fossils are over 200 million years old.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, look, before you even start, I'm not denying evolution, ok, I'm just sayingthat it's one of the possibilities.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 It's the only possibility, Phoebe.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, Ross, could you just open your mind like this much, ok? Wasn't there a timewhen the brightest minds in the world believed that the world was flat? And, up until likewhat, 50 years ago, you all thought the atom was the smallest thing, until you split itopen, and this like, whole mess of crap came out. Now, are you telling me that you are sounbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that youcould be wrong about this?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 There might be, a teeny, tiny, possibility.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 I can't believe you caved.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 What?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agreewith you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into worktomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going toface yourself? Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 I am. Let me just get my coat.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Ok, all right. It was an accident, I swear, all right. I was putting on myjacket, and the thing, and the lamp, and it broke.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Oh, please, Monica. You've always hated my lamp, and then, all of a sudden,it's just magically broken?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Phoebe, tell her!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, I didn't see it, because I was putting on my jacket, but I uh want tobelieve you.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Hey Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Neat. I'm gonna die alone.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Ok, you win.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Chandler, you're not gonna die alone.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to get a snake.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Uh huh. Why is that?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonna need a thing, you know, a hook,like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with aSnake, y=know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids willwalk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'llshout!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 You have got to get over this. You're not gonna end up alone.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Of course I am. I reject anyone who's crazy enough to actually go out withme, and then I bitch about the fact that there aren't any great women out there.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever goneout with.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 You are not a freak. You're a guy.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 She's right. She's right. You are no different than the rest of them.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Wait a minute, wait a minute. Yes he is. You are totally different.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 In a bad way?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 No, honey, in a wonderful way. You know what you want now. Most guys don't evenhave a clue. You are ready to take risks, you are ready to be vulnerable, and intimatewith someone.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Yeah. You're not gonna end up alone.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 Chandler, you called Janice! That's how much you wanted to be with someone!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 You made it!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Phoebe	 You're there!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 You are ready to make a commitment!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Whoa! Don't know about that.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 What you got there? Something else that's not yours that you can break?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 No. Um, I know you like this, and I want you to have it. I think it'll lookgood in our apartment.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 Thank you.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 That's fine.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Hey. Well, you will all be pleased to know that I have a date tomorrow night.This woman, Alison, from work. She's great. She's pretty, she's smart. And uh, I've beenholding off on asking her out in the past, because she has an unusually large head. But,I'm not gonna let that stuff hang me up anymore. Look at me. I'm growing.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Hey, uh, you can't recycle yearbooks, can you?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 I'll take that.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 You want his yearbook?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah. Some people said some nice things about him. I think somebodyshould have it.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Monica	 Oh, gosh, this is so weird. I mean, his whole life was in this apartment, andnow it's gone. You know, I think it would be nice if we just took a few moments, for Mr.Heckles. I mean, he was kind of a pain, he was, but, he was a person. You're all going tohell.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Rachel	 It's really not that big!
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Takin' that with you, huh?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Joey	 Oh, yeah.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Ross	 You comin'?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, jus' second. Good-bye Mr. Heckles. We'll try to keep it down.
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Alison	 Oh, my major was totally useless. I mean, how often do you look in theclassifieds and see "Philosopher wanted"?
02	03	0203	The One Where Heckles Dies	Chandler	 Sure. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Mom, would you relax. That was 10 blocks from here and, the, the woman was walkingalone at night, I would never do that. Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. This is a safe street,this is a safe building, there's nothing  It's open you guys.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Stranger	 Hi.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Hi, hi can I help you?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Stranger	 Yeah, I'm looking for Phoebe, does she still live here?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Stranger	 Great. Uhh, just tell her her husband stopped by. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What? 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Stranger	 Hey, how, how did you do that?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 This is unbelievable Phoebs, how can you be married?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Well, I mean, I'm not married married, ya know, he's just a friend and he'sgay and he's just from Canada and he just needed a green card.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 I can't believe you married Duncan. I mean how could you not tell me? We livedtogether, we told each other everything.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 I'm sorry Monica but I knew if I told you, you'd get really, like, judgemental andyou would not approve.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Of course I wouldn't approve, I mean, you were totally in love with this guy who,hello, was gay. I mean, what the hell were you thinking?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 You see, and you thought she'd be judgemental.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 OK, I wasn't in love with him and I was just helping out a friend.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Please, when he left town you stayed in your pajamas for a month and I saw you eata cheeseburger.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	All	 Huuh.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Well, didn't you?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 I might have.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 I can't believe you didn't tell me.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Oh, c'mon, like you tell me everything.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 What have I not told you?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't know. Umm, how about the fact that the underwear out there on thetelephone pole is yours from when you were having sex with Fun Bobby out on the terrace.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What!
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Wait a minute, who told you?  You aredead meat.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 I didn't know it was a big secret.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Oh it's not big, not at all, you know, kinda the same lines as, say, oh I don'tknow, having a third nipple.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 You have a third nipple?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 You bitch.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Whip it out, whip it out.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 C'mon, there's nothin' to see, it's just a tiny bump, it's totally useless.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Oh as, as opposed to your other multi-functional nipples?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 I can't believe you. You told me it was a nubbin.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Joey, what did you think a nubbin was?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 I don't know, you see somethin', you hear a word, I thought that's what it was. Letme see it again.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	All	 Yeah, show it. Show it. The nubbin, the nubbin, the nubbin.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Joey was in a porno movie.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	All	 Huuh.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 If I'm goin' down, I'm takin' everybody with me.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 You were in a porno?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Ahh, alright, alright, alright, I was young and I just wanted a job, OK. But at thelast minute I couldn't go through with it so they let me be the guy who comes in to fixthe copier but can't 'cause there's people havin' sex on it.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 That is wild.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	  So what's it shaped like?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Yeah, is there a hair on it?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 What happens if you flick it?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 So, uh, does it do anything, you know, special?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Why yes Ross, pressing my third nipple opens the delivery entrance to themagical land of Narnia.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 You know, in some cultures having a third nipple is actually a sign of virility.You get the best huts and women dance naked around you.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Huh? Are, uh, any of these cultures, per chance, in the tri-state area?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 You know, you are so amazing, is there anything you, you don't know?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	  Ooh, Julie's so smart, Julie's so special.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Look honey, I wanted you to hook up with Ross as much as you did. But he's withher now and you're just gonna have to get over it.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Ohh, I'm gonna have to get over it. God, see I didn't know that's I had to do, Ijust have to get over it.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	All	 Woah.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Foxy lady.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 Where you goin'?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Um, I'm gonna go meet Duncan, he's skating tonight at the Garden, he's in theCapades.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 The Ice Capades?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 No, no the gravel capades. Yeah, the turns aren't as fast but when Snoopy falls.. . funny.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 I can't believe you're dressing up for him. I mean, you're just, you're settingyourself up all over again.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 OK, no. For your information I'm going to see him so I can put all those feelingbehind me. OK, and the reason I'm dressed like this is because I think it's nice to looknice for your gay husband.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	  Hey Chandler, would you fill me up here?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Oh I see, I see, because of the third nipple thing. Ha ha ha ha. . . 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 OK sweetie, I'll see you later.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 See you later Rach.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Bye-bye Julie. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Hey.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Hey.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Hey, c'mon, cut it out.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Hey?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Can I ask you somethin'?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Sure.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Naa.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What? C'mon, talk to me.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 OK, what's the longest you've been in the relationship before ha, have, having thesex?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Why? Who's not having. . . Are you and Julie not, are, are you and, are you andJulie not having sex?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Technically, huh, no.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Wow. Is it, is it 'cause she's so cold in bed. Or, or is it 'cause she's like,kinda bossy, makes it feel like school?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 No, no, she's great and it's not like we haven't done anything. I mean, uh, uh, we,we do plenty of other stuff, lot's of other stuff, like uhh. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 No, no no no, don't need to know the details.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 It's just, it's, it's me. You, you know I've only been with one woman my whole lifeand she turned out to be a lesbian. So now I've got myself all psyched out, you know, andit's become, like this, this thing and I. . . Well, you just must think I'm weird.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 No, no, no, no I don't think it's weird, I think, I think umm, in fact, in factyou know what I think?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 I think it's sexy.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Sexy?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Let me tell you something. As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who doesnot want to have sex.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 No kidding?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Oh yeah. In fact you know what I'd do?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 I'd wait.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 You'd wait?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Yes, absolutely. I would wait and wait. . . then I'd wait some more.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Really?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs,she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. That justmeans it's working.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Women really want this?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 More than jewelry. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Hi.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Phoebe!
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Ta-da.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Hey.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Hi.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Ahh, look at you, you look great.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Do I? Thank you, so do you.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Thanks.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Sparkly. So, wow, this is pretty wonerful, huh. Mr. major capades guy. I, Iremember when you were just, like, King Friday in Mr. Roger's Ice is Nice.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 You always said I'd make it.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, ya know, I'm kind of spooky that way. Wooo.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 I missed you.  I'm gonna get changed.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 OK.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Um, now. Phoebs.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Oh, right, OK. Ole.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Um, the matador.  Ole, ha ha ha.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Julie, can you hold this for a second, thanks. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Uh, Julie.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 Yeah?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Sorry, you had a paleontologist on your face. But, uh, it's gone now, you'realright.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Hi everyone.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	All	 Hi.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	  I just, I wanted to thank you for our uh, our little talkbefore.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Oh, God, no problem. So you're gonna go with the uh, waiting thing?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Well, I was going to, but after I talked to you, I talked to Joey.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What did, what did he say?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Basically he told me to get over myself and just do it, ya know. So I though aboutwhat you said and I though about what he said and, well, his way I get to have sex tonightso. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 What's this in my pocket? Why it's Joey's porno movie.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Pop it in.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 I'm fine with it, I mean, if you're OK watching a video filled with two nippledpeople. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Great, people having sex, that's just what I need to see.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 What's wrong with people having sex?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women andfemales. And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. And, Monica help me out here.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Hell, I wanna see Joey.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 So is there like a story or do they just stard doing it right. . . oh, never mind.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 OK, now wait a minute. That is the craziest typing test I've ever seen.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 All I say is, she better get the job.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Looks to me like he's the one getting the job.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, I can't get tothe copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I do. . . so I just watch 'em have sex. Andthen I say, wait, here's my line,  you know that's bad fo r the papertray.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Nice work my friend.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Thank you. Wait wait wait wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy's butt's blockin'me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 So um, so what's up, you came to see me yesterday.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Oh, yeah, um, alright, I kinda need a divorce.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Ohh. . .K. How come?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Umm, actually, I'm getting married again.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Oh God, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm straight.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Huuh.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Yeah, I know, I.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 I, I don't, I don't understand, how can you be straight? I mean, you're, you're sosmart and funny and you throw such great Academy Award parties.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 I know, that's what I kept telling myself but you just reach a point where youcan't live a lie anymore.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 So how long have you known?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Well I guess on some level I always knew I was straight. I though I was supposedto be something else, you know, I'm an ice dancer, all my friends are gay, I was justtryin' to fit in.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 And um, and there's actually a, a woman?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Her name's Debra.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Oh. Well is she, is she the first that you've been with?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 Well, I've never told you this but, there were one or two times, back in college,when I'd get really drunk, go to a straight bar and wake up with a woman next to me. ButI, I, I told myself it was the liquor and e-everyone experiments in college. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Sure.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 But now I know I don't have a choice about this, I was born this way.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 I, I don't know what to say. I mean, you know, you're married to someone for sixyears and you think you know him and then one day says, 'Oh, I'm not gay.'
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 I'm, I'm still me.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 Why couldn't you have just figured this out six years ago?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 You know, it still smells like monkey in there.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 That saves us a conversation.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 Well, listen, this has been great but I'm officially wiped.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Me too, we should get goin'.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 No, no, I mean, no, c'mon you guys, I mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty.Let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Rachel, that's all we do.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Maybe that's all we do, what about Julie?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 What about Julie?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't reallyknow you. I mean, who is Julie? I mean, what do you like, what don't you like? We wannahear everything.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 Well, that could take a while.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 So. I mean, who here does not have the time to get to know Julie?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 I got the time to get to know Julie.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 I got time.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Monica	 Rach, I know her pretty well, can I go?  That'sfine.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 OK Julie, so now let's start with your childhood, what was that like?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 Well, in a nutshell. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Nah, uh, uh, uh, uh.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 So, um, have you told your parents?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 No, but it'll be OK, they're pretty cool, my brother's straight so. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	  Here you go. You know what, I just have one morequestion, um, if you had figured this out sooner and um, I had been around, do you thinkthat I would have been the one who. . . no, um, I'm sorry, don't tell me, I don't th inkeither answer would make me feel better.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Duncan	 I love you Phoebe. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Phoebe	 So your brother's straigh huh? Seriously.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 And my second grade teacher was Ms. Thomas, and my first grade teacher was Mrs.Cobb.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Mrs., Mrs. Gobb?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Julie	 No Cobb, as in cobb salad.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Now, what exactly is in a cobb salad?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Chandler	 I'm goin' home.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 What?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Joey	 Boy that Julie's a talker, huh?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Goodnight.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 So, it's pretty late, you're probably uh, not still planning on. . .
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Oh, no no, I am.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Oh, well, are hey, are you nervous?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Um, no, I uh, I have done it before.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. I mean, are, are ya gonna,are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 I uh, I don't know, I guess I'm just gonna see, see what happens.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 OK, gook luck.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Wha, uhh, what?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the firsttime doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 OK, now I'm nervous.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Maybe you should put it off.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 No, no, I don't wanna put it off, I just, God I just, I spent last year being sounbelievably miserable, ya know, and now, now I'm actually happy. You know, I mean, reallyhappy. I just, I just don't wanna, I don't wanna mess it up, ya know.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 I know, yeah, sorry.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 What, it's not your fault.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Maybe it, maybe it doesn't have to be this tough. I mean, maybe you were on theright track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. I mean, women really like that.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Really?
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to,I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you knowreally, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, andlook far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about tohappen.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	  Uh-huh.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 And then, I don't know, I mean you'd pull me really close to you so that, so thatI'd be pressed up, you know, right against you. And, um, it would get kind of sweaty anduh, and blurry, and then it's just happening.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Ohh. . . Thanks Rach, goodnight. 
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Rachel	 Ohh, God.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Good morning.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Old Woman	 Well, somebody got some last night.
02	04	0204	The One With Phoebe's Husband	Ross	 Twice.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Man, I sure miss Julie.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Spanish midgets. Spanish midgets wrestling. Julie. Ok, yes, I see how you gotthere. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 You ever figure out what that thing's for?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 No, see, I'm trying this new screening thing. You know, I figure if I'malways answering the phone, people'll think I don't have a life. My god, Rodrigo nevergets pinned. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Hello, I'm looking for Bob. This is Jane. I don't know if you're still at thisnumber, but I was just thinking about us, and how great it was, and, well, I know it'sbeen three years, but, I was kinda hoping we could hook up again. I barely had t he nerveto make this call, so you know what I did?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 What?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 I got a little drunk...and naked.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Bob here.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	  What've you been up to?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Oh, you know, the usual, teaching aerobics, partying way too much. Oh, and incase you were wondering, those are my legs on the new James Bond poster.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Can you hold on a moment? I have another call.  I love her.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 I know.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I'm back.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 So, are we gonna get together or what?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Um, absolutely. Uh, how 'bout tomorrow afternoon? Do you know uh, CentralPerk in the Village, say, five-ish?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Great, I'll see you then.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Ok. Ok. Having a phone has finally paid off.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Even though you do do a good Bob impression, I'm thinkin' when she sees youtomorow, she's probably gonna realize, "hey, you're not Bob."
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I'm hoping that when Bob doesn't show up, she will seek comfort in the openarms of the wry stranger at the next table.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Oh my god. You are pure evil.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Ok, pure evil, horny and alone. I've done this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	  Yeah, yeah, everybody's here. Hey, everybody, say hi to Julie in NewMexico.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	All	 Hi, Julie!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	  Hi, Julie.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Ok, while Ross is on the phone, everybody owes me 62 bucks for his birthday.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Um, is, is there any chance that you're rounding up? You know, like from, like20?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Hey, come on, we got the gift, the concert, and the cake.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Do we need a cake?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Look guys, I know it's a little steep.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Yeah, whoosh!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 But it's Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 It's Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 All right.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I'll see you guys later, I gotta go...do a thing.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Ok, sweetheart, I'll call you later tonight. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey,you're not really gonna go through with this, are you?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 You know, I think I might just.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 So uh, what are you guys doing for dinner tonight?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Well I guess I gotta start savin' up for Ross's birthday, so I guess I'll juststay home and eat dust bunnies.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Can you believe how much this is gonna cost?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Do you guys ever get the feeling that um, Chandler and those guys just don'tget that we don't make as much money as they do?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yes! Yeah, it's like they're always saying "let's go here, let's gothere". Like we can afford to go here and there.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Yes, yes, and it's, and we always have to go to, you know, someplace nice, youknow? God, and it's not like we can say anything about it, 'cause, like this birthdaything, it's for Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 For Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 For Ross, Ross, Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	  Oh my god. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Hey.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Hi.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 What?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 I'm at work, ordinary day, you know, chop chop chop, sauti, sauti, sauti. Allof a sudden, Leon, the manager, calls me into his office. It turns out they fired the headlunch chef, and guess who got the job.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 If it's not you, this is a horrible story.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Fortunately, it is me. And, they made me head of purchasing, thank you verymuch. Anyway, I just ran into Ross and Chandler downstairs, and they think we should goout and celebrate. You know, someplace nice.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yeah, someplace nice.  How much do you think I can get formy kidney? 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 I'm tellin' you. You can't do this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Oh, come on. I can never get a girl like that with conventional methods.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 That doesn't matter. She wanted to call Bob. Hey, for all we know, Bob is who shewas meant to be with. You may be destroying two people's chance for happiness.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 We don't know Bob, ok? We know me. We like me. Please let me be happy.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Go over there and tell that woman the truth.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 All right.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Go.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Hi. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Hi.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Listen, I have to, uh, um, I have to, I have to confess something.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Yes?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Whoever stood you up is a jerk.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 How did you--?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I don't know. I just had this weird sense. You know, but that's me. I'm weirdand sensitive. Tissue?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Thanks.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 No, you keep the pack. I'm all cried out today.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Ok, ok, here is to my sister, the newly-appointed head lunch chef--
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Who is also in charge of purchasing.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Newly appointed head lunch chef who is also in charge of purchasing--
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Who has her own little desk when Roland's not there.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Uh, lunch chef, purchasing, own little desk when Roland's not there. Here's to mylittle sister--
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Oh, wait, and I got a beeper!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Cool.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Let's see!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 That's fine, I'll just wait!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Oh, sorry.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Sorry, sorry.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Monica! 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 Are we ready to order? 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Oh, you know what, we haven't even looked yet.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 Well, when you do, just let me know. I'll be right over there on the edge of myseat.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Wow, look at these prices.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Yeah, these are pretty ch-ching.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 What are these, like famous chickens?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Hey, sorry I'm late. Congratulations, Mon.  I'm not sorry I'm late.How incredible was my afternoon with Jade?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Well, pretty incredible according to the message she left you on my machine. Hey,Chandler, why is this woman leaving a message for you on my machine?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Oh, see, I had to tell her that my number was your number, because I couldn'ttell her that my number was my number because she thinks that my number is Bob's number.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Hey, tell me again, what do I do when Mr. Roper calls?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 Do I dare ask?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Yes, I will start with the carpaccio, and then I'll have the grilled prawns. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 That sounds great. Same for me.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 And for the gentleman?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yeah, I'll have the Thai chicken pizza. But, hey, look, if I get it without thenuts and leeks and stuff, is it cheaper?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 You'd think, wouldn't you? Miss?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Ok, I will have the uh,  side salad.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	  And what will that be on the side of?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Uh, I don't know. Why don't you put it right here next to my water?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 And for you?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Um, I'm gonna have a cup of the cucumber soup, and, um, take care.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I will have the uh, Cajun catfish.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waiter	 Anything else?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yes, how 'bout a verse of Killing Me Softly. You're gonna sneeze on my fish,aren't you?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	  Plus tip, divided by six. Ok, everyone owes 28 bucks.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Um, everyone?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Oh, you're right, I'm sorry. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Thank you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Monica's big night, she shouldn't pay. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Oh, thank you!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 So five of us is, $33.50 apiece.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 No, huh uh, no way, I'm sorry, not gonna happen.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Whoa, whoa, prom night flashback.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, Monica, I'm really happy you got promoted, but cold cucumber mushfor thirty-something bucks? No! Rachel just had that, that, that salad, and, and Joey withhis like teeny pizza! It's just...
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Ok, Pheebs! How 'bout we'll each just pay for what we had. It's no big deal.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Not for you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 All right, what's goin' on?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Ok, look you guys, I really don't want to get into this right now. I thinkit'll just make everyone uncomfortable.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Fine. All right, fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yeah.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 You can tell us. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Hello, it's us, all right? It'll be fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Ok, um, uh, we three feel like, that uh, sometimes you guys don't get that uh, wedon't have as much money as you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Ok.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 I hear ya. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 We can talk about that.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Well, then...Let's.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 I, I just never think of money as an issue.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 That's 'cause you have it.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 That's a good point.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 So um, how come you guys haven't talked about this before?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 'Cause it's always somethin', you know, like Monica's new job, or the wholeRoss's birthday hoopla.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Wha--? Whoa, hey, I don't want my birthday to be the source of any kind ofnegative--there's gonna be a hoopla?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Basically, there's the thing, and then there's the stuff after the thing.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 If it makes anybody feel better, then we can just forget the thing, and we'lljust do the gift.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 G-gift? The thing's not the gift?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 No, the thing was, we were gonna go see Hootie and the Blowfish.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Hootie and the--oh my. I, I can catch them on the radio.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 No, now I feel bad. You wanna go to the concert.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 No, look, hey, it's my birthday, and the important thing is that we all betogether.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 All of us.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Together.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Not at the concert.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Ok.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yeah.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Thank you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Thanks.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 So, the ebola virus. That's gotta suck, huh?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Gee, Monica, what's in the bag?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 I don't know, Chandler. Let's take a look.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Oh, it's like a skit.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Why, it's dinner for six. 5 steaks, and an eggplant for Phoebe. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Whoo!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Cool.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Yeah, we switched meat suppliers at work, and the new guys gave me the steaksas sort of a thank-you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 But wait, there's more. Hey, Chandler, what is in the envelope?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 By the way, this didn't seem so dorky in the hall.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Come on.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Why, it's six tickets to Hootie and the Blowfish! The Blowfish!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 It's on us, all right, so don't worry. It's our treat.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 So...Thank you.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Could you be less enthused?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Look, it's a nice gesture, it is. But it just feels like--
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Like?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Charity.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Charity?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 We're just tryin' to do a nice thing here.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Ross, you have to understand that your nice thing makes us feel this big.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Actually, it makes us feel that big.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 I don't, I don't understand. I mean, you, it's like we can't win with you guys.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 If you guys feel this big, maybe that's not our fault. Maybe that's just howyou feel.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Oh, now you're tellin' us how you feel.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Ok, we never shoulda talked about this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 I'm just gonna pass on the concert, 'cause I'm just not in a very Hootie placeright now.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Me neither.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Me too.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Guys, we bought the tickets.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Oh, well, then you'll have extra seats, you know, for all your tiaras andstuff.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Why did you look at me when you said that?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Well, I guess now we can't go.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 What? Come on, you do what you want to do. Do we always have to do everythingtogether?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 You know what? You're right.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Fine.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 All right. We're gonna go. It's not for another six hours. We're gonna go then.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Chandler! 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yeah?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Geez! Are you ready?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yeah. Just let me grab my jacket and tell you I had sex today.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Whoa! You had sex today?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Wow, it sounds even cooler when somebody else says it. I was awesome, ok? Shewas biting her lip to stop from screaming. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Wow.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Now I know it's been awhile, but I took it as a good sign.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Still doing the screening thing?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I had sex today. I never have to answer that phone again.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Machine	 Here comes the beep, you know what to do.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Hey, Bob, it's Jade. Listen, I just wanted to tell you that I was really hurtwhen you didn't show up the other day, and just so you know, I ended up meeting a guy.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Bob here.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Oh, hi.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 So, uh, you met someone, huh?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Yes, yes, I did. In fact, I had sex with him 2 hours ago. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 So, uh, how was he?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Eh.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Eh?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Oh, Bob, he was nothing compared to you. I had to bite my lip to keep fromscreaming your name.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Well, that makes me feel so good.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 It was just so awkward and bumpy.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	  Bumpy?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Well, maybe he had some kind of uh, new, cool style, that you're not familiarwith. And uh maybe you have to get used to it.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Well there really wasn't much time to get used to it, you know what I mean?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 You know what? I'm not gonna be able to enjoy this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Yeah, I know, it's my birthday. We all should be here.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 So, let's go.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Well maybe, you know, maybe we should stay for one song.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yeah, I mean, it would be rude to them for us to leave now.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 You know, the guys are probably having a great time.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Come on you guys, one more time.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Ok. One.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Nooo.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 That was amazing!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Excellent, that was excellent.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I can't believe the guys missed this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 What guys? Oh, yeah.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 Excuse me, you're Monica Geller aren't you?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Do I know you?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 You used to be my babysitter.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Oh my god, little Stevie Fisher? How've you been?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 Good, good, I'm a lawyer now.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 You can't be a lawyer. You're eight.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 Listen, it was nice to see you. I gotta run backstage.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Uh, wait, backstage?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 Oh, yeah, my firm represents the band.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Ross.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Chandler.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Steve	 How are you? Look, you guys wanna meet the group? Come on. So, are you one ofthe ones who fooled around with my dad?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Hey, you guys.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Happy birthday.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Oh, thank you, thanks. So uh, how was your night last night?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Oh, well, it pretty much sucked. How was yours?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Yeah, ours pretty much sucked, oh, but, I did run into little Stevie Fisher.Remember him?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Oh yeah. I used to babysit him. Hey, how's his dad?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Uh, good.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Uh, aside from that, the whole evening was pretty much a bust.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yeah, we really missed you guys.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Yeah, look, we were just saying, this whole thing is really stupid.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 We just have to really, really, really, not let stuff like money get--is that ahickey?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 No, I just, I fell down.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 On someone's lips? Where'd you get the hickey?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 You know, a party, or--
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 What party?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 It wasn't so much a party as...a gathering of people, with food, and music, and,and the band.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 You partied with Hootie and the Blowfish?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yes, apparently Stevie and the band are like this.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Who gave you that hickey?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 That would be the work of a Blowfish.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Oh!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Oh! I can't believe it. I can't believe this. We're just like, sitting at home,trying to guess Joey's fingers, and you guys are out like partying and having fun, and youknow, all, "hey, Blowfish, suck on my neck".
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Ross	 Look, don't blame us. You guys coulda been there, you know.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 What, as part of your poor friends outreach program?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 It's work.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I don't know what to say. I'm sorry that we make more money than you. Butwe're not gonna feel guilty about it. We work really hard for it. 
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 And we don't work hard?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	  Yeah, hi, it's Monica. I just got a page.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 I'm just saying that sometimes we like to do stuff that costs a little more.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 And you feel like we hold you back.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 Yes.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Rachel	 Oh!
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Chandler	 No.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Monica	 Leon, Leon. Shhh! Guys. Wait, I don't understand. Those steaks were just a giftfrom the meat vendor. That was not a kick back. I'll just replace them and we can forgetthe whole thing. What corporate policy? No. Yeah. All right. I just got fired.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Phoebe	 Oh.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Waitress	 Here's your check. That'll be $4.12.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Joey	 Let me get that.  You got five bucks?
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Machine	 Here comes the beep, you know what to do.
02	05	0205	The One With Five Steaks And An Eggplant	Jade	 Hi, it's me. Listen, Bob. I'm probably way out of line here. I mean, It has been3 years, and you're probably seeing someone else now, but if we could just have one nighttogether, just for old time's sake, one hot, steamy, wild night...
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Who da wenny-Benny boy? You the Wenny-wenny-Benny-Benny boy, yes. Don't cry. Don'tcry. Why is he still crying?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Let me hold him for a sec. There.  Huh? There we are.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Maye it's me.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Don't be silly. Ben loves you. He's just being Mr. Crankypants.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You know, I once dated a Miss Crankypants. Lovely girl, kinda moody.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 There we go. All better. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 There's my little boy. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Can I uh see something? 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Cool.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 He hates me. My nephew hates me.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Come on, don't do this.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 What if my own baby hates me? Huh? What am I gonna do then?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Monica, will you stop? This is nuts. Do you know how long it's gonna be beforeyou actually have to deal with this problem? I mean, you don't even have a boyfriend yet.Joey, she does not look fat.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Goo, goo, goo, waaah!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 That is so funny. Let me see that. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Are you ok, Ross?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I don't know. What's in this pie? 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Uh, I don't know, butter, eggs, flour, lime, kiwi-- 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Kiwi? Kiwi? I thought it was a key lime pie.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 No I didn't, I said kiwi lime. That's what makes it so special. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 And that's what's gonna kill me. I'm allergic to kiwi.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 No you're not. You're, you're allergic to lobster and peanuts and--oh my god.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ugh.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Oh my god.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ugh. It's definitely getting worse.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Is your tongue swelling up?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Either that or my mouth is getting smaller.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 All right, get your coat, we're going to the hospital.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Is he gonna be ok?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Yeah, he's just gotta get a shot.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 You know, you know, actually it's getting better. It is. It is. Let's not go. Anyonefor Thcrabble?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Jacket now.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 What about Ben? We can't bring a baby to a hospital.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 We'll watch him.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I don't think tho.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 What? I have seven Catholic sisters. I've taken care of hundreds of kids. Come on,we wanna do it, don't we?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 I was looking forward to playing basketball, but I guess that's out the window.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ok, well, if you do take him out for his walk, you might wanna bring his hat, andthere's extra milk in the fridge, and there's extra diapers in the bag.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Hat, milk, got it.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 ???  Thro up a thro thro--a thro thro!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Consider it done.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You understood that?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Yeah, my uncle Sal has a really big tongue.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Is he the one with the beautiful wife?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Hey Rach, wanna hear the new song I'm thinkin' of singing this afternoon? I wroteit this morning in the shower.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Ok.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	  I'm in the shower and I'm writing a song. Stop me if you've heard it. Myskin is soapy, and my hair is wet, and Tegrin spelled backward is Nirget.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 Uh, Rachel, sweetheart, could I see ya for a minute?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 What's up?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 F.Y.I.. I've decided to pay a professional musician to play in here on Sundayafternoons. Her name is Stephanie... something. She's supposed to be very good.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 But what about Phoebe?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 Rachel, it's not that your friend is bad, it's that she's so bad, she makes me wantto put my finger through my eye into my brain and swirl it around.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Ok, ok, so you're not a fan, but I mean, come on, you cannot do this to her.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 Uh--
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Oh, no no no no. Oh no no no no. I have to do this to her?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	  Lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse, repeat, and lather, rinse,repeat, as needed.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You know, I don't think we brought enough stuff. Did you forget to pack thebaby's anvil?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 It's gonna be worth it. It's a known fact that women love babies, all righ? Womenlove guys who love babies. It's that whole sensitive thing. Quick, aim him at that pack o'babes over there. Maybe one of them will break away. No, no wait, for get them, we gotone, hard left. All right, gimme the baby.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 No, I got him.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 No, seriously.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Oh, seriously you want him?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 Hello.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Boys	 Hello.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 And who is this little cutie pie?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Well, don't, don't think me immodest, but, me?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 You wanna smell him?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 I assume we're talking about the baby now.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Oh, yeah. He's got that great baby smell. Get a whiff of his head.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 I think my uterus just skipped a beat.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	  What'd I tell you? What'd I tell you?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 I think it's great you guys are doing this.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Well, we are great guys.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Caroline	 You know, my brother and his boyfriend have been trying to adopt for threeyears. What agency did you two go through?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 But, but this is my gig. This is where I play. My, my name is written out there inchalk. You know, you can't just erase chalk.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Honey, I'm sorry.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 And he's going to be paying this woman? Why doesn't he just give her like athrone, and a crown, and like a, you know, gold stick with a ball on top.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Terry is a jerk, ok? That's why we're always saying "Terry's a jerk!"That's where that came from.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Yeah, ok. You probably did everything you could. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Ok, you know what, lemme, let me just see what else I can do. All right, look,look. Why don't you just let her go on after Stephanie whatever-her-name-is. I mean, youwon't even be here. You don't pay her. It's not gonna cost you anything.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 I, I don't know. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Come on, Terry, I'll even clean the cappuccino machine.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 You don't clean the cappuccino machine?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Of course I clean it. I mean, I,I will cleeeean it. I mean, I will cleeeean it.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Terry	 Oh, all right, fine, fine, fine.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Done.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Really?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Yeah. Who's workin' for you babe?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh my god. This is so exciting. How much am I gonna get?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 What?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Well you said that he's paying the people who are playing.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Oh, no, no no. I meant that he's gonna be paying that other woman beause she's aprofessional.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Well, I'm not gonna be the only one who's not getting paid.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Well, but Pheebs.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 No, huh uh, I'm sorry, no. No, I'm not some like sloppy second, charity band. Youknow what, there are thousands of places in this city where people would be happy to payto hear me play.  When I play, I play for me, I don't needyour charity.  Thank you! La la la la la la la....
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Well, there's no way I'm gonna get a shot. Maybe they can take the needle andthquirt it into my mouth, you know, like a thquirt gun. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Doctor	 Hello, there. I'm Dr. Carlin. I see someone's having an allergic reaction.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Doctor, can I see you for just a minute please? My brother has a slight phobiaabout needles.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Did you tell him about my thquirt gun idea?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 My brother, the PhD would like to know if there's any way to treat this orally. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Doctor	 No, under these circumstances it has to be an injection, and it has to be now.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Tho?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ohhh.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 That's good, have a seat. Um, the doctor says it's gotta be a needle. You're justgonna have to be brave, ok? Can you do that for me?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ok.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Ok. Oh boy. You are doin' so good. You wanna squeeze my hand? All right, Ross,don't squeeze it so hard. Honey, really, don't squeeze it so hard! Oh, Ross! Let go of myhand!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 That's a good plan, Joe. Next time we wanna pick up women, we should just go tothe park and make out. Taxi, taxi!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Hey, hey, look at that talent.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	  Just practicing. You're good. Carry on.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 1 On Bus	 Hey, you. He's just adorable.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Ok, but can you tell him that, because he thinks he's too pink.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 2 On Bus	 So what are you guys out doing today?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Oh we're not out. No, no. We're just uh, two heterosexual guys, hanging with the sonof our other heterosexual friend, doin' the usual straight guy stuff.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You done?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 1	 Oh, there's our stop.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Get outta here. This is our stop too.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 2	 You guys live around here too?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Oh, yeah, yeah, sure. We live in the building by the uh sidewalk.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You know it?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Hey, look, since we're neighbors and all, what do you say we uh, get together for adrink?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 1	 So uh, you wanna go to Marquel's?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Oh, sure, they love us over there.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Girl 2	 Where's your baby?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler, Joey	  Ben! Ben! Ben! 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Oh, that's good. Maybe he'll hear you and pull the cord.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Both	 Stop the bus! Wait! Wait! Wait! 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Are you sure he didn't break it because it really hurts.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Doctor	 No, it's just a good bone bruise. And, right here is the puncture wound from yourring.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Oh, I'm sorry, I'm really sorry. Sorry. Sorry! Hey! Hey! I got my s's back! Which wecan celebrate later. Celebrate. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	  ... with the double double double-jointed boy. Hey. So um, are you theprofessional guitar player?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah. I'm Stephanie.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Right. My name was on there, but now it just says "carrot cake". So, um,so um, how many chords do you know?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 All of them. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, so you know D?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Ok, do you know A minor?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Ok, do you know how to go from D to A minor?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Ok. Um, so does your guitar have a strap?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 No.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Oh. Mine does.  Stephanie knows all the chords. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	  Come on, pick up, pick up! Hello? Transit Authority? Yes, hello.I'm doing research for a book, and I was wondering what someone might do if they left ababy on a city bus. Yes I do realize that would be a very stupid charact er.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Hi, here's the deal. We lost a carseat on a bus today. It's white plastic, with ahandle, and it fits onto a stroller. Oh, and there was a baby in it. He wants to talk toyou again.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Ok, everybody, let's give a uh nice warm Central Perk welcome to--
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	  Terry's a jerk, and he won't let me work, and I hate CentralPerk!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Uh, to Stephanie Schiffer.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Thank you. I'd like to start with a song that I wrote for the first man I everloved.  Zachary.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	  You're all invited to bite me!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler, Joey	 Hi. We're the guys who called about the baby. We left the baby on thsbus. Is he here? Is he here?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Transit Authority Guy	 He's here.  I'massuming one of you is the father.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 That's me.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 I'm him.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Actually, uh, we're both the father. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Both	 Oh, Ben! Hey, buddy!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Please tell me you know which one is our baby.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Well, well that one has ducks on his t-shirt, and this one has clowns. And Ben wasdefinitely wearing ducks.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Ok.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Or clowns. Oh, oh wait. That one's definitely Ben. Remember, he had that cute littlemole by his mouth.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Yeah?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Hey, Ben, remember us? Ok, the mole came off.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Ahh!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 What're we gonna do? What're we gonna do?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Uh, uh, we'll flip for it. Ducks or clowns.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Oh, we're gonna flip for the baby?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 You got a better idea? 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 All right, call it in the air.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Heads.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Heads it is.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Yes! Whew!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 We have to assign heads to something.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Right. Ok, ok, uh, ducks is heads, because ducks have heads.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 What kind of scary-ass clowns came to your birthday?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Hey.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Oh, hi.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Here. I thought you might be cold.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Thank you.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Whoa, look at you, you did pretty well.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Eight dollars and 27 cents. But not really, 'cause I put in the first two, justto, you know, get the ball rolling, and to make myself feel better.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Do you?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 No. This whole like playing-for-money thing is so not good for me. You know, Idon't know, when I sang "Su-Su-Suicide", I got a dollar seventy-five. But then,"Smelly Cat", I got 25 cents and a condom. So you know, now I just feel reallybad for Smelly Cat.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Well, you know, honey, I don't think everybody gets Smelly Cat. You know, I mean,if all you've ever actually had are healthy pets, then, whoosh!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 It's not even that. I used to do my songs because it made me happy, but now it'slike, it's just all about the money.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Well, people missed you in there. And in fact, there was actually a request for"Smelly Cat".
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Really? From who?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Rachel	 Well, from me. And I know it's not your big money song, but it's my favorite.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Kid	 Hi. Uh, did I accidentally drop a condom in your case? It's kind of an emergency.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Yeah. Here you go.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Kid	 Thanks a lot. Hey Christine, I got it!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I just wanna thank you for being there for me today. And I'm sorry I,I almost brokeyour hand.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 That's ok. I'm sorry I poisoned you.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Yeah. Hey, remember the time I jammed that pencil into your hand?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Remember it? What do you think this is, a freckle?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Oh.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Wait, what about the time I hit you in the face with the Silvian's pumpkin?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Oh, man. Oh, remember when I stuck that broom in your bike spokes, and you flippedover and hit your head on the curb? 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 No. But I remember people telling me about it.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I hope Ben has a little sister.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Yeah. I hope she can kick his ass.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I'm gonna get a new band-aid. Hey, how 'bout the time I cut the legs off your MalibuKen?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 That was you?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 They, uh, were infected. He wouldn't have made it.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Monica	 Aw, my little nephew. Come here, little one. There's my little baby Ben. Hey, mylittle boy. Hey, he's not crying.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	  Hey, he's not crying.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Yes! There's still pie.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 I'm here. How's my little boy? Want Daddy to change your diaper? So, did you havefun with Uncle Joey and Uncle Chandler today?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Joey	 Oh, yeah, he rode the bus today.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Ohhh. Big boy, riding the bus--Hey, I have a question. How come it says Property ofHuman Services on his butt?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 You, you are gonna love this. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Ross	 Will you hold Ben for a sec? Come here. Come here.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Chandler	 Stay back, I've got kiwi. Run, Joey, Run!
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	  Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 No, no, no. I'm sorry. It's "smelly cat, smel-ly cat".
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Smelly cat, smel-ly cat...
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Better. Yeah.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Yeah, much better. And you know what, don't feel bad, because it's a hard song.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah. 
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 You wanna try it again?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Yeah. From the top?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Ok, there is no top. That's the beauty of Smelly Cat. Um, why don't you justfollow me?
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Stephanie	 Ok.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 Mmmm hmmm.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Together	 Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat, it'snot your fault.
02	06	0206	The One With The Baby On The Bus	Phoebe	 That's too much. Sorry.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 OK, what is it about me? Do I not look fun enough? Is there something. . .repellant. . . about me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 So, how was the party?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Well it couldn't have been worse. A woman literally passed through me. OK, sowhat is it, am I hideously unattractive?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, you are not, you are very attractive. You know what, I go through the exact samething. Every time I put on a little weight, I start questioning everyting.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Woah, woah, I've put on a little weight?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, not wieght... y'know, more like insulation.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Chandler, I'm unemployed and in dire need of a project. Ya wanna work out? I canremake you.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, you know, I would, but that might get in the way of my lying around time.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Please.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	All	 C'mon. Let her. Yeah.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Alright, OK, alright. But if we put on spandex and my boobs are bigger than yours,I'm goin' home.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Your boobs are fine. Look, I never should have said anything. Come here. Come here. Oh, can't make.... hands...meet....
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 OK, let's do it.  What?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Nothing, just never seen you in little stretchy pants before.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 And we're changing. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 C'mon give me five more. Five more.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	  No.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Five more and I'll flash you.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 One. . . two. . . two and a half. OK, just show me one of them.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 .She's insane, the woman is insane. It's before work, it's after work, it's during work.She's got me doing butt clenches at my desk. And now, they won't bring me my mail anymore.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hey Phoebs, how'd it go with Scott last night?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh, um, it was nice. Took him to a romantic restraunt, ordered champagne, nice.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 The guy still won't put out, huh?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Nope. Zilch, nothin', uh-uh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	All	 Sorry Phoebs.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Look, I, y'know, I don't mind taking it slow, I like him a lot, y'know he's reallyinteresting and he's really sweet and why won't he give it up?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Maybe he, uhh... drives his car on the other side of the road, if ya know what Imean.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, whad'ya mean? He's not British.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Maybe he's. . . gay.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oohh, um, no, I don't think that's the problem. 'Cause we went, um, dancing theother night and the way he held me so close, and the way he was looking into my eyes Ijust like... definitely felt something.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, but how much can you tell from a look?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, I felt it on my hip. You could tell.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	  Yo, Bing. Racquetball in 15 minutes.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Joey, be a pal. Lift up my hand and smack her with it.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	  Ooh, oh, Rachel, don't look.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 What?  C'mon you guys, I don't care, I have a datetonight.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Woah, woah, woah, you have a date?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, Monica's settin' me up.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 But uh, uh, what about uh, Ross and uh. . .?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh what, my whole insane jealousy thing? Well, y'know, as much fun as that was, I'vedecided to opt for sanity.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 So you really OK about all this?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh yeah, c'mon, I'm movin' on. He can press her up against that window as much as hewants. For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Hi guys.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	All	 Hey.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Oh, Monica, I figured I'd come by tomorrow morning and pick up Fluffy's old cat toy,OK?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Only if you say his full name.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	  Can I come over tomorrow and pick up Fluffy Meowington's cat toy.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Alright.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	  You're getting a cat?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Uh, actually, we're getting a cat.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Together?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Uh huh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Both of you?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Yep.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Together.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Julie	 Yeah, we figure it'll live with Ross half the time, and with me half the time.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohh, well, isn't that just lovely. That's something the two of you will be able toenjoy for a really, really, really, really, really long time.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Hopefully.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Well.  OK, we're notsupposed to take these when we leave.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 I don't know if Monica told you but this is the first date I've gone on since mydivorce so, if I seem a little nervous, I am.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	  How long do cats live?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	  I'm sorry?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Cats, how long do they live figuring you don't... y'know, throw 'em under a bus orsomething?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Um, maybe 15, 16 years.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 That's just great. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Um, cheers.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, right, clink. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Monica told you I was cuter that this, didn't she?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. I'm sorry, it's just, it's this thing. It's probablynot as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Oh, that does sound. . .Ahh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 I mean he just started going out with her.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Is this guy, uhh, an old boyfriend?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ah, hah-hah-hah-ho, yeah, he wishes. Oh, I'm sorry, look at me. OK, Michael, let'stalk about you. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Alright.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 OK, OK. So, you ever get a pet with a girlfriend?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 So, I figured it out.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 What?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Why Scott doesn't want to sleep with me. It's 'cause I'm not sexy enough.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Phoebe, that's crazy. When I first met you, you know what I said to Chandler? Isaid, "Excellent butt, great rack."
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Really? That's so sweet. I mean, I'm officially offended but, sweet.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Phoebs look, if you want to know what the deal is, you're just gonna have to askhim.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 You're right, you're right. Ah, you are so yumm. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	  What're they called, what're they called, what're theycalled?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Fruitflies?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yes! Thank you.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Waiter	 So, would you like any dessert?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 No! No dessert, just a check, please.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, you're not having fun, are you?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 No, no, I am, but only because for the last hour and a half I've been playing themovie Diner in my head.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, look at me, look at me. Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I canthink about is Ross and his cat and his... Julie. I just want to get over him. gosh, whycan't I do that?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Oy. Look, I've been through a divorce, trust me you're gonna be fine. You just can'tsee it now because you haven't had any closure.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah! Closure. That's what it is, that's what I need. God, you're brilliant! Whydidn't I think of that? How do I get that?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Well, you know, there's no one way really, it's just, you know, whatever it takes sothat you can finally say to him, "I'm over you."
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Closure, that's what it is. Closure. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Guy	 Hang on.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hello, excuse me.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Guy	 What.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hi, I'm sorry, I need to borrow your phone for just one minute.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Guy	 I'm talkin'!
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 I can see that. I... just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for itmyself.  OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Guy	 Alright, fine. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Thank you. OK.  Machine. Just waiting for the beep.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Michael	 Good.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 No, no, no, no, no, no  No. Monica, it's Sunday morning. I'mnot running on a Sunday.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Why not?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Because it's Sunday. It's God's day.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 OK, if you say stop, then we stop.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 OK, stop.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 No, c'mon, we can't stop, c'mon, we've got three more pounds to go. I am the energytrain and you are on board. Woo-woo, woo-woo, woo-woo  Woo.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Hey Rach.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ahhhh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Oh. And how was the date? 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Umm, I think there was a restaurant... I know there was wine. . .
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Wow, well uh, uh, actually, Julie's downstairs getting a cab, I just need the cattoy, did Monica say. . . What? Why, why are you looking at me like that?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don'tremember.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 OK. Oh, oh, oh. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Did we speak on the phone last night? Did you call me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 No, I stayed at Julie's last night.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Huh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Oh, actually I haven't even been home yet. Do you mind if I check my messages?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh yeah, go ahead. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Rach, I got a message from you.  Who's Michael?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give methe phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 You're over me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohhhhhhhh God. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Wha... you're uh, you're, you're over me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohh, ohh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 When, when were you... under me? Rach. Rachel do you, I mean, were you, uh. . .What?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohh, OK, OK, OK, well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings foryou.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 You've had feelings for me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, what, so? You had feelings for me first.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Woah. Huh. You know about my, I mean, you know I had... you know?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Chandler told me.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Chandler. When did he... when did he... when did he?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 When you were in China.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 China.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Meeting Julie.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Julie. Julie. That. Oh God. Julie, right. OK, I need to lie down. No, ya know, I'mgonna stand. I'm gonna stand, I'm gonna walk, I'm walkin' and I am standing. OK so you uh,and now wha... and now, now, now you're over me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Are you over me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	  HiJulie.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Julie	  Hi honey, I've got a cab waiting.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	  I'll be right down.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Wait, so, you're going?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Well, OK, I uh, I have to. I can't deal with this right now. I mean, I've uh,y'know, I've got a cab, I've got a girlfriend, I'm... I'm gonna go get a cat.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 OK, OK.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Cat. 
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Hey Joey.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Hey Phoebs.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 How come you're watching a rabbi play electric guitar?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 I can't find the remote.  Thank you.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 So, Scott asked me to come over for lunch today and I did.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 And?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 And we did.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 All right Phoebs, way to go.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Yay me.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 So, so how did it happen?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well, I finally took your advice and asked him what was going on.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 And what did he say?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 He said that, um, he understands how sex can be like, a very emotional thing for awoman and he was just afraid that I was gonna get all, y'know, like, 'ohh, is he gonnacall me the next day' and, y'know, 'where is this going' and, ya know, blah-la-la-la-la.So he said he wanted to hold off until he was prepared to be really serious.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Wow.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Yeah, so I said, "OK, relax please," y'know, I mean, sex can be just abouttwo people right there in the moment, y'know, it's, if he wants to see me again he cancall and if not, that's fine too. So after a looooot of talking. . . I convinced him.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 Let me get this straight. He got you to beg to sleep with him, he got you to say henever has to call you again, and he got you thinking this was a great idea.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Phoebe	 Um-hum.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Joey	 This man is my God.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hi.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 I didn't get a cat.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh, that's um, interesting.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 No, no it's not interesting. OK, it's very, very not interesting. In fact it'sactually 100 percent completely opposite of interesting.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Alright, I got it Ross.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	  What?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 I was doing great with Julie before I found out about you.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easy for me tosee you with Julie?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Then you should have said something before I met her.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 I didn't know then. And how come you never said anything to me.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 There was never a good time.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Right, you, you only had a year. We only hung out every night.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Not, not, not every night. You know, and... and it's not like I didn't try,Rachel, but things got in the way, y'know? Like, like Italian guys or ex-fiances or, or,or Italian guys.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'm withsomebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell itwas you felt for me?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Hey, I've been doin' it since the ninth grade, I've gotten pretty damn good at it.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Fine.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Good.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 Good.  
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Rachel	 And ya know what, now I've got closure.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Ross	 Try the bottom one.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Monica, it's 6:30 in the morning. We're not working out, it's over.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 No way, with one pound to go, c'mon. We're workin', we're movin', we're in the zonewe're groovin'.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 OK, I don't, I don't mind the last pound. OK, in fact I kind of like the last pound.OK, so don't make me do anything that I'll regret.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Ooh, what'cha gonna do, fat boy, huh? What?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Nothing, except tell you, uh, I think it's wonderful how much energy you have.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Well, thanks.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 I mean, especially considering how tough it's been for you to find work.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Well, you know.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 You know, I mean, you can't tell your parents you were fired because they'd bedisappointed.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	  Uh-huh.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 And it's not as if you have a boyfriend's shoulder to cry on.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Well no, but um.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have difficulty just getting out of bed at all.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Y'know, I try to stay positive. . .
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 So, you feel like goin' for a run?
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 Alright.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 Because, you know, you don't have to. If you want, you could just take a nap righthere.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Monica	 OK. Just for a little while.
02	07	0207	The One Where Ross Finds Out	Chandler	 OK. 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Ross kissed me.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 It was unbelievable!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Ok, all right. We want to hear everything. Monica, get the wine and unplug thephone. Rachel, does this end well or do we need to get tissues?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh, it ended very well.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Oh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  Do not start without me. Do not start without me.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Ok, all right, let's hear about the kiss. Was it like, was it like a soft brushagainst your lips? Or was it like a, you know, a "I gotta have you now" kind ofthing?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Well, at first it was really intense, you know. And then, oh, god, and then wejust sort of sunk into it.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Ok, so, ok, was he holding you? Or was his hand like on your back?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 No, actually first they started on my waist. And then, they slid up, and then,they were in my hair.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe, Monica	 Ohhhh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 And, uh, and then I kissed her.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Tongue?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Yeah.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Cool.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 All right, check out this bad boy. 12 megabytes of ram. 500 megabyte hard drive.Built-in spreadsheet capabilities and a modem that transmits at over 28,000 b.p.s.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Wow. What are you gonna use it for?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	  Games and stuff.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  There are no jobs. There are no jobs for me.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	  Wait, here's one. Uh, would you be willing to cooknaked?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 There's an ad for a naked chef?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 No, but if you're willing to cook naked, then you might be willing to dancenaked. And then... 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hi.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Hey, oh, so, um...how'd you make out last night?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 That, that is funny. That is painfully funny. No, wait. Wait, yeah, that's justpainful
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Wait a minute. I thought last night was great.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Yeah, it was, but...I get home, ok, and I see Julie's saline solution on my nighttable. And I'm thinking to myself, oh my god, what the hell am I doing? I mean, here I am,I am with Julie, this incredible, great woman, who I care about and who cares about me,and I'm like, what, am I just gonna throw all that away?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 You got all that from saline solution?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 We are talking about Rachel here. You and Rachel.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Believe me, I've been dreaming about me and Rachel for ten years now. But now,I'm with Julie, so it's like me and Julie, me and Rachel, me and Julie, me and... ... Rachel. Rachel, Rachel.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  Hey, you.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 How are you?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Good. How are you?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Good.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Julie	 Hi, honey.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hi, Julie.  Hi, Julie. Julie, um, how are you?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Julie	 Good.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	  Good, so everybody's here. Everybody's good. So, were you gonnaplay something, Phoebe?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Oh, well, actually.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	  Play it.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Ok, all right.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Hey, Julie, I didn't know you wore lenses.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Julie	 What?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	  Ssshh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Ok, um, hi, hello, hi, ok, so, um, this is a song about a love triangle betweenthree people that I made up. Um, it's called, um, "Two of Them Kissed LastNight". 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	  There was a girl, we'll call her Betty, and a guy let's call him Neil.Now I can't stress this point too strongly, this story isn't real. Now our Neil mustdecide, who will be the girl that he casts aside. Will Betty be the one who he lovestruly? Or will it be the one who we'll call Ju...Loolie? He must decide, he must decide,even though I made him up, he must decide!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 This is a nice resume. Nice, nice, nice. Muy impressivo.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 So, Mr. Rastatter, what exactly does this job entail? The ad wasn't too clear.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Mockolate.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 I'm sorry?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Mockolate. It's a completely synthetic chocolate substitute.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Ohh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Go ahead. Try a piece. Yeah, we think that Mockolate is even better thanchocolate.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 All right. Mmm-mmm.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Yeah?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  I love how it crumbles. Now see, yourchocolate doesn't do that.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 No, ma'am. Well, anyhoo, we should be getting our F.D.A. approval any day now,hopefully, in time for Thanksgiving. See, the way we look at it, chocolate alreadydominates most of your major food-preparation holidays: Easter, Christmas, what have you.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  Mmm-mmm.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 But, we're thinking, given the right marketing, we can make Thanksgiving theMockolate holiday.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Wow.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Aren't you going to swallow that?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Just waiting for it to stop bubbling.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Yeah, isn't that great?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  Mmm.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Well, anyhoo, um, we are looking for a couple of chefs who can create someThanksgiving-themed recipes. You think you might be interested?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Abso......lutely. See, I love creating new recipes. I loveThanksgiving. And, well, now, I love Mockolate.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Really?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Especially the after taste, you know, I'll tell ya, that'll last ya tillChristmas.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 How about Mockolate mousse?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 It's not, it's not very Thanksgiving-y.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Ok, how about pilgrim Mockolate mousse?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 What makes it pilgrim?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 We'll put buckles on it.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Hey.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Hey.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Did uh, Ross call?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 No, I'm sorry.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Why didn't he call? He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? He's gonna stay withher and she's going to be all, "Hi, I'm Julie, Ross picked me, and we're gonna to getmarried, have a lot of kids and dig up stuff together."
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 No offense, but that sounds nothing like her.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I don't know what to do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this, this is like acomplete nightmare.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Oh, I know. This must be so hard. Oh, no. Two women love me. They're bothgorgeous and sexy. My wallet's too small for my fifties, and my diamond shoes are tootight.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Hey, here's a thought, Ross. 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Don't touch the computer. Don't ever touch the computer.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Ross, listen. I got two words for you. Threesome.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Ok, all right, look. Let's get logical about this, ok? We'll make a list. Racheland Julie, pros and cons. Oh. We'll put their names in bold, with different fonts, and Ican use different colors for each column.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Can't we just use a pen?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 No, Amish boy.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Ok, let's start with the cons, 'cause they're more fun. All right, Rachel first.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I don't know. I mean, all right, I guess you can say she's a little spoiledsometimes.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 You could say that.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 And I guess, you know, sometimes, she's a little ditzy, you know. And I've seenher be a little too into her looks. Oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common 'causewe're both paleontologists, but Rachel's just a waitress.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Waitress. Got it. You guys wanna play Doom? Or we could keep doing this. Whatelse?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I don't know.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Oh, her ankles are a little chubby.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Ok, let's do Julie. What's wrong with her?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	  She's not Rachel.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Ok, this is pumpkin pie with mockolate cookie crumb crust. This is mockolatecranberry cake, and these are mockolate chip cookies. Just like the Indians served.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh my god.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh my god good?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh my god, I can't believe you let me put this in my mouth.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Oh, oh sweet Lord! This is what evil must taste like!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 I'm telling you this thing won't print. Yes, I pressed that button like 100times. You know, for a hot line you are not so hot. What? What is that in the background?Are you watching Star Trek?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	  Hey, so how'd it go with Julie? Did you, did you break her heart?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Yes, it was horrible. She cried. I cried. She threw things, they hit me. Anyway,I did the right thing.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	  So, Spock actually hugs his father?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Hey, do you guys have......hi.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hi.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  Where you goin'?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I uh, I just got back from uh, from Julie's.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  Oh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, no, uh, it's not what you think. It's um the other thing.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Well, what's the other thing, what do I think?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Well, uh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 He broke up with Julie. Well, go hug her, for god's sakes.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Really?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Really. It's always been you, Rach.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh, god.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey, Chandler	 Ohhh.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh, oh, this is good, this is really good.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I know, I know, it's, it's almost... Whatdo you say we go take a walk, just us, not them?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Let me get my coat.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Ok. No, hey, whoa, whoa, I'll get your coat.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Ok, he's goin' to get my coat. He's goin' to get my coat. Oh my god, you guys. Ican't believe this. This is unbelievable.  What'sthat?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	  What? Nothing.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 What's that? What? I saw my name. What is it?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 No, no, see? See?  Hey, it's printing!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Well what is it? Let me see.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hey, someone order a coat?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 He won't?  He won't! Because, isn't that, isn't that the,the short story you were writing?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Yes, yes it is, short story, that I was writing.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 And I'm in it? Then let me read it.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler, Joey, Ross	 No!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Come on.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Hey, uh, why don't you read it to her?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	  "It was summer, and itwas hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. 'Oh, look,' cried Ned, and then thekingdom was his forever. The end."
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 That's it? That's all you wrote? You're the worst writer in the whole world.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 All right, you know what? This isn't funny anymore. There's something about me onthat piece of paper and I want to see it.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, you don't.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 All right, you know what, that's fine. If you guys want to be children aboutthis, that's fine. I do not need to see it. 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 What is this? Ross, what is this?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Good luck.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Ok, just, just remember how crazy I am about you, ok?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Kind of ditzy? Too into her looks? Spoiled?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Now that's a little spoiled. He was supposed to type "little", theidiot.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Just a waitress?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, that, that was, I mean, as opposed to uh, the uh, ok. Is this over yet Rach?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh! I do not have chubby ankles!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, no, wait, ok, ok, look at the other side. Look at Julie's column.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 She is not Rachem. What the hell's a Rachem? Is that some stupidpaleontology word that I wouldn't know because I'm just a waitress.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, Rach, come on. Rach! Rach, no, no! She's not Rachel, she is, she is not,Ra--Rachel?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 My diary! My diary, that's brilliant. I should have told her it was my diary, shenever would have made me read her my diary.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 You know, that's true. You'd be a great person to have around the day after anemergency.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 I... I cannot believe Ross even made this list. What a dinkus.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Hey, cut him some slack. It was Chandler's idea.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 What?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 What?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Oh good, I was hoping that would come up.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 This was your idea?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 What were you thinking?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	  All right, let's get some perspective here, ok? These things, theyhappen for a reason.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Yeah. You!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 All right, Pheebs, back me up here, ok? You believe in that karma crap, don'tyou?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Phoebe	 Yeah, by the way, good luck in your next life as a dung beetle.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Rach! Whoops! Rach, hey, open up, please!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. Thatdoesn't mean please climb up the fire escape.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I just wanna read something. It's your pro list.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Not interested.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	  Ok, ok, number one: The way you cry at game shows. Number two:how much you love your friends. Number three: the way you play with your hair when you'renervous. Number four: how brave you are for starting your life over. Number five: howgreat you are with Ben. 
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Number six: the way you smell.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	  Hey, Ross! What are you doin'?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hey, Joey. You wanna open the window?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	 Oh, yeah, I do.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 What are you doing out there?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 I am, uh, I am...
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh, you must be freezing. You know what you need? How about a nice steaming cupof hot Mockolate?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Rach, come on, open up. Rach, come on, come on, Rach. You got to give me anotherchance.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 No.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 That's what I said.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Chandler	 Look, maybe we should go?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 No, you guys, you really don't have to go, we're done talking.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Rach, come on, look, I know how you must feel.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  No, you don't, Ross. Imagine the worst things you think aboutyourself. Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the worldnot only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 No, but, but I wanna be with you in spite of all those things.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross.  I said don'tgo!
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 You know what? You know what? If, things were the other way around, there'snothing you could put on a list that would ever make me not want to be with you.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	 Well, then, I guess that's the difference between us. See, I'd never make a list.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Joey	  Maybe a littlelonger.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Now, in some of these recipes, the quantities may seem just a little unusual, uh,like these coconut mockolate holiday nut bars. I've indicated four cups of coconut, andfour cups of crushed nut, and only, uh, one tablespoon of mockolate.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Doesn't matter.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 What?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Our FDA approval didn't come through. Something about laboratory rats.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh, gosh, I'm sorry.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Yeah, well, anyhoo, here is your check.  Thank you for all thetrouble you went through. Um, listen, you didn't eat a lot of it while you were cooking,did you?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Well, uh, I ate some.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Oh, some, that's fine. Some is fine. Some is not a lot. So, it doesn't burn whenyou pee, does it?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Hello?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Hi.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Rachel	  Is that him again? Tell him I'd come to the phone, but my ankles areweighin' me down.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	  Listen, I... I don't think this is the best time.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Ross	 Look, can, can you do something for me?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Sure, what? Ok, ok.  Music?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Radio	 The next one's dedicated to Rachel from Ross. Rachel, he wants you to know he'sdeeply sorry for what he did and he hopes you can find it in your heart to forgive him.  
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Radio	 Uh, we've just gotten a call from Rachel, and she told us what Ross did. It'spretty appalling, and Ross, if you're listening, I don't wanna play your song anymore. Whydon't we devote our time to a couple that stands a chance? Avery, Michelle's sorry she hityou with her car and she hopes you two will work it out.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Hi, thanks for coming in again.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Oh, not at all. I have no morals and I need the cash.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 It's like I'm lookin' in a mirror. Anyway, they're called"fishtachios". They taste exactly like pistachios, but they're made primarily ofreconstituted fish bits. Here, try one. You're not allergic to anything, are you?
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Monica	 Cat hair.
02	08	0208	The One With The List	Mr. Ratstatter	 Oh, sorry.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. Ugly Naked Guy is decorating his tree. Oh my God, youshould see the size of his Christmas Balls.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey, how much did you guys tip the super this year?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, we were gonna give fifty, but if you guys gave more, we don't wanna lookbad.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Oh, actually this year we just made him homemade cookies.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 And twenty-five it is.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 You gave him cookies?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Money is so impersonal. Cookies says someone really cares. . . Alright, we'rebroke, but cookies do say that.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 I can see that. A plate of brownies once told me a limerick.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Phoebs, let me ask you something, were, were these, uh, funny brownies?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Not especially. But you know what, I think they had pot in them.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 So you guys, who else did you tip with cookies?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Uhh, the mailman, the super.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Oh, and the newspaper delivery guy.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Oh my God.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 What?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Uhhh, I don't think you're gonna like this.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Oh look, and he did my crossword puzzle.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Yeah, but not very well, unless 14-across, 'Gershwin musical' actually isbitemebitemebitemebiteme.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 I can't believe it's Christmas already. Ya know, I mean, one day your eatin' turkey,the next thing ya know, your lords are a-leapin' and you geese are a-layin'.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Which is why geese are so relaxed this time of year.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey guys.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler, Monica, Joey	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey Rach. I, uh, got you a little present.  Walks down stairs, alone or in pairs,everyone knows it's. . . just a big spring. Alright, you still mad at me becuase ofthe whole. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Horrible and degrading list of reasons not to be with me?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 How 'bout from now on we just call it the 'unfortunate incident'? Hey Gunther, you got stairs in your place?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Gunther	 Yeah.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Here, go nuts. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey guys.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler, Monica, Joey	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 What's in the bag?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Um, just some presents.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 C'mon show us what you bought. . . You know you want to.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	  OK. OK, this is a picture frame from Ben to my parents, huh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Cute.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 I got some, uh, hers and hers towels for Susan and Carol. And, uh, I got this blousefor mom.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Ross, that is gorgeous!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Yeah?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Look at these authentic fake medals. I tell ya, mom's gonna be voted best dressedat the make-believe military academy.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Gang	 Hey. Hi Phoebe.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Happy Christmas Eve Eve.  Oh my God, where did you getthis?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Uh, Macy's, third floor, home furnishings.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 This is my father, this is a picture of my dad.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Nah, Phoebs, that's the guy that comes in the frame.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 No it isn't, this is my dad, alright, I'll show you.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Phoebe, I thought your dad was in prison.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 No, that's my stepdad. My real dad's the one that ran out on us before I was born.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 How have you never been on Oprah?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	  OK, look, see, this is him. My mother gave me this picturebefore she died, same guy.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Honey, uh, this is a picture of the frame guy posing in front of a bright bluescreen with a collie.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 It's not a blue screen... it's just, maybe it was just really clear that day. OK,I have to talk to my grandmother. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Oh, wait a minute honey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Gang	 Phoebs. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Wow.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 So anyway, I'm trying to get my boss's ex-wife to sleep with me. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Gang	 Joey!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Oh, but when Phoebe has a problem, everyone's all ears!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Esther Livingston.  Gone.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Hi, Phoe.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Hi Gram. Whatcha doin'?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Oh, just updating the phonebook.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Um, gram, um, can I see the pictures of my dad again?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	  Oh. Oh, sure, sure, uh, uh, how come?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Just, you know, to see... um.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Oh, sure, yeah.  This is the one of you fatherin a meadow, and, uh, helping a little boy fly a kite, and here he is at a graduation. . .another graduation. . . another graduation.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, is this really my father?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Is it really your fa--I can't... well of course it is.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, I smell smoke. Maybe that's 'cause someone's pants are on fire.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Look, I. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Ya know, in all the years that we have been grandmother and granddaughter, youhave never lied to me.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Alright, that is not your father, that's just a picture of a guy in a frame.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Oh God.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 It was your mother's idea. Ya know, she didn't want you to know your realfather because it hurt her so much when he left, and, I didn't want to go along with it,but, well then she died and, and it was harder to argue with her. Not impossible, butharder.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Alright, so, what, he's not a famous tree surgeon? And then, I guess, OK, hedoesn't live in a hut in Burma where there's no phones?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Last I heard, he was a pharmacist somewhere upstate.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, that makes no sense. Why would the villagers worship a pharmacist?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Honey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	  Oh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Anyway, that's all I know. That, and this.  This is the real him.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Oh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Ya know I remember my father, all dressed up in the red suit, the big blackboots, and the patent leather belt, sneakin around downstairs. He didn't want anybody tosee him but he'd be drunk so he'd stumble, crash into something and wake everybody up.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Well, that doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Who said anything about Christmas?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Hi.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey, anyone hear from Phoebe yet?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 No, nothin'.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 I hope she's OK.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Yeah, I know exactly what she's goin' through.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 How do you know exactly what she's going through?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 She told us.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 So whaddya got there Monica?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Just some stuff for the party.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Yeah, what're you guys doin' here, aren't you supposed to be Christmas shopping?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 You guys haven't gotten your presents yet? Tomorrow's Christmas Eve, what're yagonna do?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Don't you have to be Claymation to say stuff like that?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. Here are theornaments your mom sent. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Well, maybe the mailman liked the cookies, we just didn't give him enough.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Monica, pigeons learn faster that you.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey, Rach, you know what? I think, I think I know what'll make you feel better.How 'bout you make a list about me.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Wha... forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 C'mon Rachel.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you'regutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. Youlike me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. And, uh, oh, you wear too muchof that gel in your hair.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 See there, you uhh, alright, ya, you did what I said.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Yeah, and you know what? You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah, um, in Albany, can I have the number of Frank Buffay. . . OK, um, in Ithica.. . alright, um, Saratoga. . . Oneonta. Alright, you know what, you shouldn't call youselfinformation. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Hello grandma, if that is in fact your real name.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 C'mon now Phoe, don't still be mad at me. How's it going?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Well, not so good. Upstate's pretty big, he's pretty small, you do the math.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Well, I think you're better off without him. Oh honey, I know he's your daddybut, but to me he's still the irresponsible creep who knocked up your mom and stole herGremlin.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 No I just, just wanted to know who he was, ya know.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 I know. OK, I wasn't completely honest with you when I told you that, uh, Ididn't know exactly where he lived.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Whattaya mean?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 He lives at 74 Laurel Drive in Middletown. If you hit the Dairy Queen, you'vegone too far. You can take my cab.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Wow. Thank you.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Grandmother	 Now, remember, nobody else drives that cab.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, got it. Ooh, I'm gonna see my dad. Wish me luck, Grandpa! 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Phoebe here with the cab yet?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, she, she brought the invisible cab. . . hop in.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Well she better get here soon, the outlet stores close at 7.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Hey, don't worry. I figure it'll be 2 hours to Phoebe's dad's house, they'llmeet, they'll chat, they'll swap life stories, we'll still have plenty of time.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey, here she comes.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Can you believe this. In, like, two hours I'm gonna have a dad. Eeeshk.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Eeeshk.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Yeah, big stuff.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, let's go.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 OK.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Alright, here, you have to hold this. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 OK.  Brake left, gas right?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, yeah, that's my cheat sheet.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	  Where's my seat belt?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Oh, no no, that side doesn't have one, the paramedics had to cut through it.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	  Hey!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 C'mon, just tell me, please, please.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 For the sixteenth time, no... I do not think you're obsessive.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Oh, gosh, it's hot in here.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Rach, get the heat.  Ross,could you turn the heat down please?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Sure. By the way, there's a difference between being obsessive and. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Ross, the heat!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Fine, OK! Heat, heat, heat, and I'm the obsessive one.  off.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Did you just break the radiator?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 No, no, I was turnin' the knob and, and. . . here it is.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Well put it back.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 It uhh, it won't go back.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 I'll call the super.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Here, let me try.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Oh, oh that's right, I forgot about your ability to fuse metal.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Hey, it's Funny's cousin, Not Funny.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	  Hi, Mr. Treeger. Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. Yes, somebody,uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. Yes, it's, it's hot enoughto bake cookies. Well, do you think we could have a new one by 6? Wha t, no, no, Tuesday,we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 OK, tip the man.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 No, if he doesn't like our cookies, too bad, I am not gonna be blackmailed. Lookif worse comes to worse, it gets a little warm, we'll call it a theme party.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey, here's a theme: Come on in, live like bacon.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Ooh, this is it, 74. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Oh, so that's what this is for.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Wow, this is it, I'm gonna meet my dad. This is like the biggest thing ever, huh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Sure is.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, here I go. I'm goin' in.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Alright.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Good luck Phoebs.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK, here I go. . . here I go. . . I'm goin'. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	  Hi, welcome to our tropical Christmas party. You can put your coatsand sweaters and pants and shirts in the bedroom.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	  It's hard to tell because I'm sweating, but Iuse exactly what the gel bottle says, an amount about the size of a pea. How, how can thatbe too much?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	  Ice, ice, ice squares anyone? Take a napkin. Alright.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Monica, Monica, your guest are turning into jerky, OK.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Really? I'm perfectly comfortable. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	  Mr. Treeger.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 Uhh, you said there was a party.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, well hey, welcome to our sauna.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 Ahh, is it hot? My body always stays cool, probably 'cause I have so muchskin. Hey, cheese!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Alright, alright, here's the chance. Monica give him cash, Rachel give him yourearrings. Something, now, anything.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 No, I will not cave.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Yeah, I'm with Mon.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Alright, alright, you know how you say I never seize the day? Well, alright, eventhough he's your super, I'm seizing.  Mr. Treeger, here is 50bucks, merry Christmas.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 Oh wow, I didn't get you anything. Here's five back.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 No no, no, that, that's your Christmas tip, alright. Oh, hey, do you think there's achance you could fix that radiator now?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 No can do, like I told the girl, I can't get a new knob until Thursday.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Ross.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Yeah.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	  Looks like he's playin' baseball.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 You mean hardball?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Whatever.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 What'cha gonna' do?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Excuse me, I'm seizing. Mr. Treeger, here's another 50, happy Hanukkah. Will uh,will this help with the knob getting?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 No, the place is not open 'till Tuesday. Am I not saying it right.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 So, wait, you really did like my cookies?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 Oh, yeah, they were so personal, really showed you cared.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Nice seizing. . . gel boy.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	  So, uh, is this, uh, mistletoe?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Huh-huh, no act--no, uhh, that, that is basil.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Mr. Treeger	 Ahh, if it was mistletoe, I was gonna kiss ya.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Huh-hoo, yeah, no, it's still basil.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 OK.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 How far'd ya get?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Mailbox.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Alright, we're gettin' closer.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Phoebs, what's goin' on?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 No, it's just like, ya know, it's a whole mess of stuff, ya know. It's like,yesterday, ya know, my dad was this, like, famous Burma tree surgeon guy and, ya know, nowhe's a, a pharmacist guy and. . .
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Well, maybe he's, maybe he's this really cool pharmacist guy.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah, maybe, yeah. You know, and, and I'll knock on the door and, and he'll hug meand I'll have a dad. Ya know and I'll, I'll go to his pharmacy and everyone will be reallynice to me 'cause, you know, I'm Franks daughter.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Well, so why not go knock?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Well, 'cause, I mean, what if, what if he's not this great dad guy? I mean, whatif, what if he's just still the dirtbag who ran out on my mom and us? You know what? I'vealready lost a fake dad this week and I don't think I'm ready to lose a real one.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Phoebs, that's OK. You took a big step today.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, and someday when you're ready, you'll make it past the hedges.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Yeah, and when you do, he'll be lucky to have you.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 You guys. I'm sorry about your shopping.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Oh, that's OK, we'll figure something out.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Uh, listen Phoebs, I know you're not goin' in there but do you think it'd be alrightif I went in and used his bathroom? Oh, that's fine, never mind. Cool, snow, kinda like ablank canvas.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Ho, ho, ho, holy crap is it hot in here!
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Really, hey, you mind if I turn the heat down?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Hey, we could have used that kind of thinkin' earlier.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Hey, Phoebs, how'd it go.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Oh, I couldn't go in.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Monica	 Honey, I'm sorry.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Are you OK?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah, no it's OK 'cause, I mean, I know he's there, so, that's enough fornow.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 Hey, guys, it's after midnight, merry Christmas everyone. 
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Hey, Monica, the knob was broken so I just turned it off from underneath, I hopethat's alright.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Rach, these are for you.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Rachel	 Wiper blades. I don't even have a car.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 OK, Phoebs, your turn.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 Uh-huh.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Phoebe	 You guuuyys.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 You got me a cola drink?
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 And, a lemon lime.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Ross	 Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Chandler	 And last but not least.
02	09	0209	The One With Phoebe's Dad	Joey	 They're ribbed for your pleasure.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clockin the morning.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 I'm excited! I've never gotten reviewed before.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 You were so amazing as the king. I was really impressed, I was.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Although, you know what? You might want to consider wearing underwear next time.Yeah, cause when you sat down on your throne you could kind of see your... royal subject.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Here it is, here it is.  The only thing worse than themindless, adolescent direction was Joseph Tribbiani's disturbingly unskilled portrayal ofthe king.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 OK, look, that is one guy's opinion, alright. Phoebs, read yours.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 OK.  The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction...
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Does anyone have one from a different paper? Ross, read yours.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 I don't want to.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Joey, honey, they don't know what they're talking about.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Yeah.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Maybe they do. I've been doin' this ten years and I haven't gotten anywhere.There's gotta be a reason.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Oh c'mon. Maybe you're just, uhhh... paying your dues.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait one minute. Wait a minute. I believe thiswill change your mind.  sucking.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 When I was little, I wanted to be a veteranarian, but then I found out you had toput your hands into cows and stuff.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	  Hiiiiii.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Are... are you OK?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid.Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He,he's here, isn't he?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Maybe.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Don't toy with me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Geller!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Hey, Fun Bobby!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Hey. Whoa, hey, you've been working out, huh?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Not at all! I love this guy. Hey, I was so psyched to hear you're back with mysister!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 You and me both.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Hey, so what'd I miss, what'd I miss, c'mon?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Oh, we were just trying to make Joey feel better.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Hey, do you need me to pick you up?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 No, I'm alright man. Really.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 No, I'm picking you up.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me...  Alright! It still works.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up?  I'm still gonna go.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 OK, I'll see you later babe.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Uh, public display of affection coming up. You can avert your eyes. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 See ya. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	All	 Bye! See you later!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Fun Bobby is so great.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. Imean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple ofmonths, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Half full of looooovvvvve.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 And for our two-week anniversary, he's gonna take me to his cousin's cabin forthe weekend.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Cabin of loooooovvvvve.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 We went through a lot of wine tonight, you guys. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Really? I only had two glasses.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 I just had a glass.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Two.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 I had one glass.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 I had about a mugful in this lovely 'I got boned at the Museum of NaturalHistory' mug.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 OK, so that's... that's what, two bottles? And yet somehow we went through five?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Oooooh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	  Ooooooh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 So what. So he drank a lot tonight.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen FunBobby without a... a drink in his hand.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Yeah. Oh, OOOH, yeah, you know, did you notice how he always starts his storieswith, um, OK, 'I was soooo wasted,' or, 'Oh, we were soooo bombed,' or, ummm, ooh, ooh,'So I wake up, and I'm in this dumpster in Connecticut.'
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Monica, have you ever been with him when he wasn't drinking?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, howdo you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Rach, does this have nonfat milk?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	  Mmmm, no.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Oh well, too late, sorry, you already had some.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	  Whattaya say we make these, uh, coffees Irish?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Um, cake.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Yeah, we're gonna... we're gonna get some cake. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 You know what? It seems like you've been making an awful lot of stuff Irishlately.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Well, I would make them Belgian, but the waffles are hard to get into that flask.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Bobby.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Yeah, OK.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Look, maybe this is none of my business, or maybe it is, I don't know... but, uh,I'm kind of worried about you.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this,but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a socialdrinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 So, what are you saying now?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 I guess I'm saying, I'll try and quit. I kinda like that you worry about me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	  Sooo, what's goin' on, huh?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 I am gonna try and quit drinking.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	  Ooohh, why?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Guess who's back in show business.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Ohh, ohh, Lorne Green?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 No, no, Phoebs. You know why? Cause he's dead.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Oh, no.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 OK, I guess this is gonna seem kinda bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Oh, well, we have to celebrate. You know what we should do? We should do, like, asoap opera theme.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey, yeah... we could all sleep together and then one of us could get amnesia.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Hey Rach, what time do you get off? We're all gonna do something tonight.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Ummmm.... well, actually I'm already done, but I...I kinda got plans.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	  You have other friends?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Yeah... I, uhh... I have a... I have a date.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 What?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 With a man?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 What? What is so strange about me having a date?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list aboutyou?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Noooo, no, I'm not mad at him. I'm.. I'm not really anything at himanymore.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 What are you talking about?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 I don't know. Whatever I was feeling, I'm... not.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 But you guys came so close.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Oh, I know, I'm sorry you guys. You're just gonna have to get used to the factthat I will not be dating Ross.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Here he is. Hi. Guys, this is Russ.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	  Hhhhiiiii.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Stop saying you're not talented, you're very talented. It's just with the birddead and all, there's very little act left. Oh, honey, give me a break, will ya?  Oooh, ooh, I'll talk to you later.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Well, there's my favorite client. So tell me darling, how was the audition?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Joey, have you ever seen me ecstatic?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 No.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Well, here it is. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 OK, uh.... listen, there's something I want to talk to you about. The networkcasting lady...
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Oh, isn't Lori a doll?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Oh yeah, yeah, she's great, but... I kinda got the feeling that she was sortof... coming on to me. And I definitely would get the part if I would've... you know... ifI would have sent the Little General in.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Estelle	 Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what'sgoin' on and straighten it out. Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 What's the matter?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 It's Fun Bobby.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 What, isn't he sober?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh, he's sober alright. Just turns out that Fun Bobby was fun for a reason.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Ohhh, OK.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Alright, here you go, sweetie. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Thanks. You wanna hear something funny?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh God, yes!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 There are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 That is funny.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 I needed to buy a hammer the other night, and I'm out walkin' around theneighborhood but apparently there are no hardware stores open past midnight in theVillage.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Ahhh, hey honey? Don't you have to be at your interview now?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Oh yeah. See you guys. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Bye..... ridiculously dull Bobby.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh.... my... God.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 It's not that bad.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Not that bad? Did you hear the hammer story?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 OK, OK, don't get all squinky.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up withhim. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Alright, don't say that. He's probably always been dull. You just, you know, setit free.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	  Hey Ross.... bahhhh!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Hi Russ, I've just got two more tables to clean and then we'll go, OK?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 OK, I'll just sit here and... uh... chat with your, uh.... friend-type....people.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Rachel? Um, hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 OK, so, you know what you're doing, right?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Uhh.... waitressing?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Well, yeah, but... no. I mean, umm... doesn't.... doesn't Russ just remind you ofsomeone?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	  Huh, Bob Saget?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	  Oh, yeah! No, no, no, no, oh, oh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Oh, my, oh!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 What? What's wrong?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 I, OK....
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 She's just upset because she, uh, she buttered a spider into her toast thismorning.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Alright.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Ross, Russ. Russ, Ross.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Are you a, uh, friend of Rachel's?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Actually, I'm a... kind of a.... you know, a... date-type... thing... ofRachel's.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 A date.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Yeah, I'm her date.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Oh, oh, you're... uh... you're, oh you're the date.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 You know, this is actually good, because if we ever lose Ross, we have a spare.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Oh, you are the, uh... paleontologist.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Periodontist.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 See? They're as different as night and... later that night.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Well, I am going to, uh... get a beverage. It was nice, nice... uh... meetingyou.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Ditto.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 I, uh, well... I... I met Russ.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Oh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Hey, I didn't know we were, uh, seeing other people.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Well, we're not seeing each other, so....
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator ofmoths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn tome much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, ifthis is the deal...
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Well, yeah, this is the deal.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 OK, well, um, have a nice evening.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Um, Russ, you ready?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Yeah.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Bye.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Bye.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Bye.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	  She's dating. She's dating.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Yes, yes, but did you see who she was dating?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 What do you mean?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Do you not see it?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 See what? I don't know what she sees in... innn that goober. And it takes him,what? Like... like... I don't know, uhh... uhhh, hello.... a... week, to get out asentence.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Yeah, it's annoying, isn't it?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 ....................Yeah.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Whoa, whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or... uh, Italy called andsaid it was hungry.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Well, the part's mine if I want it.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Oh my God!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Yeah, if I'm willing to sleep with the casting lady.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	  Oh my... God?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Daysof Our Lives. That's actually on television.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 So, what're you gonna do?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Well, I guess I could sleep with her... I mean, how could I do that?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Well, I... I've got a pop-up book that told me everything I need to know.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 I've never slept with someone for a part.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Well is she... 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Sorry.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 It's alright. Is she good-looking?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something,I'd be buying her breakfast.  You know, after having slept with her.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see itis you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree anda fat guy and you've got Christmas.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean,let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was becauseof my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Didn't you used to call it the Little Major?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Waiter	 Can I get you something from the bar?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Yes, I would like something.  No, no thankyou.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 No, no really. I.. I wouldn't feel right about it.  Just some water.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 So the light went out in my refrigerator...
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	  I'd like a scotch on the rocks with a twist.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey, we're having some fun now, huh, Ross? Wanna do another one, huh Russ? OK...eleven letters, atomic element number 101... ends in ium.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Dysprosium.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	  Dysprosium? Try mendelevium.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 And weenie number two has it. Unless, of course, nine-down, Knights in WhiteSatin was sung by the Doody Blues.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 You don't see it? You actually don't see it?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 What?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 OK honey, you're dating Ross.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 No, Phoebs. I'm dating Russ.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Russ is Ross. Russ... Ross!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Steve... sleeve!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 OK, noone is named Sleeve.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names beingsimilar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	  For your information, it's a card sharp, not a card shark.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 You could not be more wrong. You could try... but you would not be successful.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 OK, I'm gonna get some more coffee before the pinching and eye-poking begins.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 I know what your problem is.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Oh you do, do you?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Um-hum, you're jealous.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Of... of what?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can majorin. It's like day one, floss. Day two, here's your diploma.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Hey, you listen.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 No, no, let me finish.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 No, let me finish.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 No, you let me fini...
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Ewww, ewww, ewww, ewww! 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Did Joey say what he was gonna go when he left?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a greatjob?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Why would I have to sleep with you?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 It's my game. You want the job or not?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Morning.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Where ya goin'?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Ooooohhhh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 What's with all the bottles of liquor?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 What's going on, is... uh, Bobby drinking again?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but Ifind his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 Oh God, even his knock is boring.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Hi. I'll be ready in just a second.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Uh, can I talk to you a minute?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Sure.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 This is really hard for me to say.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh God, you fell off the wagon.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Oh, no, no, it's about you.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 What about me?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 I think you may have a drinking problem.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 What these?  Oh, these are, um, for.. cuts andscrapes.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Look, I am just not strong enough to be in a codependent relationship right now,OK?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Oh... shoot.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 Well, anyway, I hope we can be friends.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 OK.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Take care.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Fun Bobby	 You too.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Rachel	 What happened?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	 Well we... we kinda broke up.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Gang	 Awwwwwwww.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Monica	  Does anybody want these?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 I'll take one. Sometimes I like to hold stuff like this and pretend I'm a giant.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Gang	 Hey!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 How'd the callback go?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 So what'd you do?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Ross	 Good for you.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at theelevator and offered me an even bigger part.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 So... and?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Soooooo... you are now looking at Dr. Drake Ramore, neurosurgeon, recurring in atleast four episodes!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Gang	 Allright!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Joey	 Alright... I've got to go shower. 
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Oh, hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Hi.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm sorry man.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any ideawho she's talking about?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Oh I do, it's.... it's Bob Saget. She hates him.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Russ	 Oh.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Julie	 Hey.
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Chandler	 Hey!
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Phoebe	 Hey, Julie! Hey, how are you doing?
02	10	0210	The One With Russ	Julie	 Um, oh, I don't know. I mean, it's definitely weird not being with Ross, but Iguess I'm doing OK. Actually I've got some of his stuff that he, um....
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Ok. Here's his diaper bag, and his uh, Mr. Winky, and uh...oh, him. Hi!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 So how did everything go?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh, great. Great. There was a projectile, uh, throwing up incident, but hestarted it.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Well, we've gotta go.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Ok.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Oh, right. Um, I've got some news. It's about us.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh, you and me?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Uh, no, Susan and me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 The other us.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Ok.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 We're uh, we're getting married.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 As in, "I now pronounce you wife and wife" married?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Anyway, we'd like you to come, but we totally understand if you don't want to.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Why wouldn't I want to come? I had fun at the first wedding.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Look I just thought that...
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 No no no, I mean, hey, why shouldn't I be happy for you? What would it say aboutme if I couldn't revel in your joy? I'm revelling baby, believe me!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 Is your finger caught in that chair?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Mmm hmmm.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Want us to go?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Uh-huh.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 This is so cool. You're actually gonna be on television.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 It really hit me last night. I'm gonna be on Days of our Lives. And then Istarted thinkin' about all of u, and how these are the days of our lives..
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Yes! Carol and Susan's caterer had a mountain bike accident this weekend, andshe's in a full body cast.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross, Chandler, Joey	 Yes!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 They want me to do it, which is really cool, seeing as I've never cateredbefore, and I really need the money, and this isn't a problem for you, is it?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Would it matter?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Oh, you are so great!  Thank you!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Are you really not going?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 I am really not going. I don't get it. They already live together, why do theyneed to get married?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 They love each other, and they wanna celebrate that love with the people thatare close with them.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 If you wanna call that a reason.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	  Who's thebitterest man in the living room, the bitterest man in the living room? Hi, neighbor.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Ross, I thought you were over this.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Look, that has nothing to do with this, ok? She's my ex-wife. If she weremarrying a guy, none of you'd expect me to be there.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Hey, if she were marrying a guy, she'd be like the worst lesbian ever.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	  Did I miss it? Did I miss it?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 No, I'm on right after this guy shoots himself.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Whoa, she's pretty.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Yeah, and she's really nice too. She taught me all about how to work the cameras,and smell-the-fart acting.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 I'm sorry, what?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 What?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimes you need aminute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take this big pausewhere you look all intense, you know, like this. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Oh, ok.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 There's my scene, there's my scene.  "Mrs. Wallace, I'mDr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Wallace	 Is she gonna be all right?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 I'm afraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is sufferingfrom a..subcranial hematoma. Perhaps we can discuss this over coffee.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Nice!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 That's great!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Excellent!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 For a minute there I thought you were actually tryin' to smell something.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 That is so good! Do it again!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 All right, all right. "Damnit Braverman, it's right there on thechart!"
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 That's great. All right, I gotta get to work, I got a big dinosaur bone toinspect.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 No no, that's me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Oh, yeah. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh, hello.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, thanks. I couldn't uh...
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Is everything ok?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Um, no, huh-uh. One of my clients died on the massage table today.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh my god.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 That's a little more relaxed than you want them to get.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah, um, she was 82 years old. Her name was um, Mrs. Adelman.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Oh, honey.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's just so strange. I mean, she probably woke up today and thought,"ok, I'll have some breakfast, and then I'll take a little walk, and then I'll havemy massage." Little did she know God was thinking, "Ok, but that's it." Oh,but the weirdest thing was, ok, I was cleansing her aura when she died, and when thespirit left her body, I don't think it went very far.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 What do you mean?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I think it went into me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 God, this is so hard. I can't decide between lamb or duck.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Well, of course, lambs are scarier. Otherwise the movie would've been calledSilence of the Ducks.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Ok, who ordered what?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh, I believe I had the half-drunk cappuccino with the lipstick on the rim.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Yes, and this with the cigarette butt in it, is that decaf?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh god.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 I can't believe you're so uptight about your mom comin'.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to thinkthat because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	  Talk about crap. Try listening to Stella Niedmantell the story of her and Rod Steiger for the hundredth time.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Uh, Pheebs, how long do you think this lady'll be with us?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I don't know. I mean, she obviously has some kind of unfinished business.  Sit up!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	  There she is.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Mom!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Sweetie! So this is where you work? Oh, it's wonderful! Is it a living room?Is it a restaurant? Who can tell? But I guess that's the fun.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Pretty much.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Monica! You look gorgeous! Last time I saw you, it was eat or be eaten.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 This is Joey, and Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Oh hello, Ross. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Hi, Mrs. Green. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 So, what do you think of my daughter in the apron with the big job?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh Mom!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 If you didn't pour the coffee, no one would have anything to drink.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Believe me, sometimes that happens.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 This is just so exciting. You know, I never worked. I went straight from myfather's house to the sorority house to my husband's house. I am just so proud of you.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Really?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Yes.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I know who it is you remind me of. Evelyn Dermer. 'Course, that's before shegot the lousy face lift. Now she looks like Soupy Sales.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Pheebs, who's Evelyn Dermer?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I don't know. Who's Soupy Sales?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Oh my god, there's an unattractive nude man playing the cello.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	  You have some life here, sweetie.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 I know. And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barryand get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this isjust so much better for me, you know?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 I do. You didn't love Barry. And I've never seen you this happy. I look atyou and I think, oh, this is what I want.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 For...me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Well, not just for you.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Well, what do you mean?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 I'm uh, considering leaving your father.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	  All right. Tell me if this is too cute. Lesbian wedding,chicken breasts.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh god. I think I'm gonna be sick.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Why? It's not like I'm putting little nipples on them.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 And you had no idea they weren't getting along?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 None.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 They didn't fight a lot?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 No! They didn't even talk to each other. God, how was I supposed to know theywere having problems?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	  In my day, divorce was not an option.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 Hey, look who's up.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 I just can't believe this is happening. I mean, when I was little, everybody'sparents were getting divorced. I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry aboutthis.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Is there any chance that you can look at this as flattering? I mean, she'sdoing it because she wants to be more like you.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 You know, it's funny when my parents got divorced, they sent me to thisshrink, and she told me that all kids have a tendency to blame themselves. But in yourcase it's actually kinda true.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 That's him.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Damn. My mail order grandfather hasn't come yet.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Phoebe?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yes, hi, Mr. Adelman. Thanks for meeting me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Oh, that's all right, although you did cut into my busy day of sitting.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Um, do you wanna sit?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Oh, no, please, I spent most of mid-morning trying to stand up. Now uh, what canI do for you, my dear?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I don't know how to say this, but I think when your wife's spirit left herbody, it um, kind of stuck around in me.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 You're saying, my wife is in you?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah. Ok, you don't have to believe me but um, can you think of any unfinishedbusiness she might have had, like any reason she'd be hanging around?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Well, I don't know what to tell you dear. The only thing I can think of is thatshe always used to say that before she died, she wanted to see everything.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Everything?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Everything.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Whoa, that's a lot of stuff.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	 Oh, wait, I remember, she also said she wanted to sleep with me one last time.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, there's laughing in my head.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mr A	  Worth a shot, huh?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Look at this.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 These are from Halloween three years ago.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Oh, look, here's Barry. Did he have to come straight from the office?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 No, that was his costume. See, he's actually an orthodontist, but he came as aregular dentist.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Um, you guys, you know when I said before, "thank you, but I don't reallyneed your help"?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Actually, what I think you said was, "don't touch that, and get the hellout of my kitchen."
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Really? Weird. Anyway, see, I planned everything really well. I planned and Iplanned and I planned. It just turns out, I don't think I planned enough time to actuallydo it.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Hey, Mon, you want some help?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 If you want.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	  Hey. What a day. I took her everywhere. The Museum of ModernArt, Rockefeller Center, Statue of Liberty.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 She's still with you?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah. I guess she hasn't seen everything yet. I'll be right back, she has to goto the bathroom again.  Oh, such a pretty face.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 This is so much fun, just the girls. You know what we should do? Doesanybody have any marijuana?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 God!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 All right, look, nobody's smoking pot around all this food. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 That's fine. I never did it. I just thought I might. So, what's new in sex?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh! What's new in sex?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 The only man I've ever been with is your father.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 I'm dicing, I'm dicing, I don't hear anything.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 I mean, this is no offense to your dad, sweetie, but I was thinking theremight be more.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry. You know what? I cannot have this conversation with you. I mean,god, you just come in here, and drop this bomb on me, before you even tell Daddy. What?What do you want? Do you want my blessing?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 No.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 You want me to talk you out of it?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 No.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Then what? What do you want?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 I guess I just figured of all people you would understand this.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Why on earth would I understand this?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 You didn't marry your Barry. I did.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Oh.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 All right people, we're in trouble here. We've only got 12 hours and 36 minutesleft. Move, move, move!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Monica, I feel like you should have German subtitles.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Joey, speed it up!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 I'm sorry, it's the pigs. they're reluctant to get in the blankets!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Monica, how did this happen? I thought you had this all planned out.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Do you want me to cry? Is that what you want? Do you wanna see me cry?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Sir! No sir!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	  All right, you!
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 No. Look, I told you I am not a part of this thing.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 All right, look, Ross. I realize that you have issues with Carol and Susan, andI feel for you, I do. But if you don't help me cook, I'm gonna take a bunch of thoselittle hot dogs, and I'm gonna create a new appetizer called "pigs in Ross". Allright, ball the melon.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Hey! How come I'm stuck dicing, when he gets to ball the melon.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Hi.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 How's it going?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 It's goin' great. Right on schedule. Got my little happy helpers.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Fine, whatever.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 What's the matter?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Nothing. Ok, everything. I think we're calling off the wedding.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 What?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 You're still gonna pay me, right? Or something a little less selfish.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Carol, what's the matter? What happened?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 My parents called this afternoon to say they weren't coming.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Oh my god.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 I mean, I knew they were having trouble with this whole thing, but they're myparents. They're supposed to give me away and everything.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 It's ok. I'm sorry.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 And then Susan and I got in this big fight because I said maybe we should calloff the wedding, and she said we weren't doing it for them, we were doing it for us, andif I couldn't see that, then maybe we should call off the wedding. I don't know what todo.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 I uh can't believe I'm gonna say this, but I think Susan's right.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 You do?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Look, do you love her? And you don't have to be too emphatic about this.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Of course I do.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Well then that's it. And if George and Adelaide can't accept that, then the hellwith them. Look, if my parents didn't want me to marry you, no way that would have stoppedme. Look, this is your wedding. Do it.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 You're right. Of course you're right.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 So we're back on?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 We're back on.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 You heard the woman. Peel, chop, devil! I can't believe I lost 2 minutes.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 It just seems so futile, you know ? All these women, and nothing. I feel likeSuperman without my powers, you know? I have the cape, and yet I cannot fly.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Well now you understand how I feel every single day, ok? The world is mylesbian wedding.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	  Butterscotch? No one? All right, you'll be sorrylater.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Thank you.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Any time. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Carol	 Ross. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Minister	 You know, nothing makes God happier than when two people, any two people,come together in love. Friends, family, we're gathered here today to join Carol and Susanin holy matrimony.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	  Whoa, she's gone. She's gone. She's gone! Go ahead, get married. Go, go.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Would you look at them?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Yeah, can't help but.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	  I wrapped those bad boys.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I miss Rose. 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Oh, yeah? 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 I know it's kind of weird, but I mean, she was a big part of my life there, youknow, and now I just feel kind of alone.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Woman	 You know, I uh, I couldn't help but overhear what you just said, and I thinkit's time for you to forget about Rose, move on with your life...how 'bout we go get you adrink?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Ok, that's so nice.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 Hey, Mom? Having fun?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Mrs. Green	 Oh, am I! I just danced with a wonderfully large woman. And three othergirls made eyes at me over the buffet. Oh, I'm not saying it's something I wanna pursue,but it's nice to know I have options.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 There's more alcohol, right?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 How you doin'?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Ok.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 You did a good thing today.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Yeah.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 You wanna dance?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 No, that's fine.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Susan	 Come on. I'll let you lead.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Ok.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 Ok, which one of us do you think is gonna be the first one to get married?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Ross	 Well, Mon, I was married.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah, me, too, technically.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Rachel	 I had a wedding.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Monica	 All right, just trying to start an interesting discussion.
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Joey	 I got one. Which one of us do you think will be the last to get married? 
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	Chandler	 Isn't Ben in this?
02	11	0211	The One With The Lesbian Wedding	All	 Oh, yeah!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Commercial Voiceover	 Can't get the monkey off your back? Then put it in your mouth...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Commercial Voiceover	 ...With MonkeyShine Beer. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 That commercial always makes me so sad.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, but then the guy opens his beer and those girls run at him, so, everythingseems to work out OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 I meant because the monkey in it reminds me of Marcel.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I can see that, 'cause they both have those big brown eyes and, ya know, thelittle pouty chin.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 And the fact that they're both monkeys.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Sometimes I wonder if I did the right thing, ya know, giving him away.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. I mean, I have aMalibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Remember when sometimes he'd borrow your hat, and, and when you got it back there'dbe little monkey raisins in it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, well sure, when he did it, it was funny. When I did it to my boss's hat. .. all of the sudden I have this big attitude problem.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, hey, check it out, guess what I got.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Rhythm?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, my first fan mail.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Alright!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	  'Dear Dr. Remore, know that I love you and would do anything to haveyou.' Gosh. 'Your not-so-secretive admirer, Erica Ford.' Ooh wait, 'PS enclosed pleasefind 14 of my eyelashes.'
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 This wasn't addressed to Days of Our Lives, this is, this came to yourapartment. There's no stamp on it, this woman was in our building.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh my god, I got my very own stalker.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey guys.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Hey.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ooh, where are you off to, Travelin' Jake?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, there's this, uh, paleontology conference in L.A. so I figured I'd go and thendrive down to the zoo and surprise Marcel.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You know I think he will be surprised, 'till he realizes he's a monkey, and uh,you know, isn't capable of that emotion.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, Phoebe, that really cute guy is here again.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, oh, OK, so everyone, pretend like I'm telling you a story, OK. And, and it'sreally funny. So everyone just laugh, now.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know, I know.  Hello.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 Hi. I'm Rob Dohnen.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hi Rob Dohnen.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 I don't know anything about music, but I think you're really, really great.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, wow.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 Anyway, I schedule performers for the childrens libraries around the city and I wasjust thinking, have you ever thought about playing your songs for kids?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, I would love to have kids. . . you're, you're the, you're, me play the songsthat I will write for them.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, whaddya wanna do for dinner?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well we could just stay in and cook for ourselves. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hello.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 It's Erica.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ah, the stalker.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Never mind, it's open.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Yes, hitting her with a frying pan's a good idea. Wemight wanna have a backup plan, though, just in case she isn't a cartoon.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Let's get out of here.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 The one time they're not home.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 OK, we'll just leave, and when we pass her on the stairs, she won't know it's me'cause we've never met.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's how radio stars escape stalkers.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 She's comin'.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 It's me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh, this is it, this is how we're gonna die. Ready?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wait, wait, wait. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Hi.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Erica.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 Hi, Dean Lipson, zoo administrator. I was told you had a question.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, I uh, I can't seem to find the monkey I donated last year. He's a capuchan,answers to the name Marcel.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 Ahh, I'm afraid I have some bad news. Marcel has passed on.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God, what happened?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 Well he got sick, and then he got sicker, and then he got a little better but thenhe died.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 I can't believe this.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 I'm sorry Mr. Geller. But ya know, there's an old saying, 'Sometimes monkeys die.'It's not a great saying but it certainly is fitting today.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, ya know, someone should have called me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 I'm sorry. Look, I know this can't bring him back but here, it's just a gesture.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Zoo dollars?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Lipson	 Yes, and come see the bird show at 4. The macaws wear hats. Well it's a lot cuterif your monkey hasn't just died.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Kids	 Ooohhh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't believe Joey's having lunch with his stalker. What i-, what is she like.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, you remember Cathy Bates in Misery?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel, Monica	 Yeah.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, she looks the exact opposite of that.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And she's not crazy?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh no no no, she's a total wack job. Yeah, she thinks that Joey is actually Dr.Drake Remore.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh my God.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ah, and I mean, he's going out with her? He can not persue this.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey, just because this woman thinks she can actually see Joey through themagical box in her living room doesn't mean she's not a person. I mean, does she notdeserve happiness, does she not deserve love? What're you lookin' at me for? He's the onewho wants to boff the maniac.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 You OK?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No, uh-uh, I'm just, I'm nervous. So, you know what, maybe if I just, if I picturethem all in their underwear.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 That's not a good idea, that's kinda the reason the last guy got fired.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I'm just, I'm, I'm, I'm used to playing for grown-ups. Ya know, they just,grown-ups drink their coffee and do their grown-up thing, ya know, and kids listen. Thisis a huge responsibility. What? Are you gonna kiss me?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 I was thinkin' about it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK.  OK, alrighty, let's play some tunes. Hi everybody, I'm Phoebe
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Hi Phoebe.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK, um, I'm gonna play, um, some songs about grandparents, OK. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Oh, Drake, isn't it amazing?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah it is. . . what?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Well, here we sit, devil may care, just a little while ago you were reattachingsomeone's spinal cord.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, that was a tricky one. In reality, that operation takes like, over 10 hours,but they only showed it for 2 minites.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Who's they?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 No one.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Oh Drake, you are so talented, let me see those hands. Oh these hands, thesebeautiful hands, oh I could just eat them. . . but I won't.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Good, otherwise my watch would fall off. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 No, seriously. These hands. These miracle, magical, life-giving hands. Oh, just tobe near them, touch them, maybe even lick one?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Alright, just one.  Wow, you're good atthat.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Waiter	 Oh my God! Someone, he's choking. Is anyone here a doctor?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Well, yes, yes, the best doctor in all of Salem, Dr. Drake Remore.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Meet me in the nocturnal house in 15 minutes.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uhh, hey look, I don't really enjoy being with other men that way. But, um,zoo dollars?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 It's about your monkey. It's alive.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 I don't understand, why didn't you help that man?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh, cause, uhh, I'm a neurosurgeon and that was clearly a case of, uh, uh, foodalchokage. Alright, look, I got to tell you something.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 No, no no no, you don't have to tell me anything. You don't have to explainyourself to me. Ooh, who am I to question the great Dr. Drake Remore?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 But that's what...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 I should just be happy to be near you.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey I- 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Hey what?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 That's it, just hey. Like at the end of a dance, HEY! Hey. He-hey.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  There'll be times when you get older
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Excellent!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Very informative!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Not at all inappropriate!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Thank you for coming everybody. There're cookies in the back.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 That was great, the kids loved you.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yay, I rock.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 And you know why? Because you told the truth, and nobody ever tells kids thetruth.You were incredible.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 How did you know there was a but?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I sense these things. It was either but or butter.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 The thing is, I think some of the parents, they were kinda hopin' that you'd playmore songs about like, barnyard animals.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I can do that.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 Really?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 Because that would be fantastic. What? You wanna kiss me?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Thinkin' about it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Ahh, the bat. Ambassador of darkness, flitting out of his cave like a wingedmessenger, sightless spectre of the macabe.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Buddy, my monkey?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Oh, yeah, right. There was a break-in, few months back, inside job. Your monkeywas taken.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God. But the zoo told me that my monkey was dead.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 The zoo! Do you believe everything the zoo tells ya?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 That, that's the only thing the zoo's ever told me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Of course they're gonna say he's dead. They don't want the bad publicity. It'sall a great big cover-up. Do you have any idea how high up this thing goes?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 That guy Lipson?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Lipson knows. Do you have any idea who else knows?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 No, I, I only know Lipson.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Hmm, Lipson knows huh? Ahh, hello Mr. Opossum, enigma of the trees, upside-downdenizen of the night, taunting gravity with...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Buddy, my monkey, my monkey.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Word on the street - well, when I say street, I mean those little pretend streetsthey have here at the zoo.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Of course.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Your monkey found a new career, in the entertainment field. That's all I know.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 This is unbelievable.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 So, what is this information worth to you, my friend?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Are you trying to get me to bribe you?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Janitor	 Maybe.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 But you already told me everything.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Check it out, he actually is the MonkeyShine monkey.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, so what're you gonna do?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, I guess I'm gonna call the beer company and try to find out where he is.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's what I did when I lost my Clydesdales.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK, hi again.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Hi Phoebe.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Today we're gonna start with some songs about barnyard animals.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Tv Doctor	 You're the only one who can save her Drake.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey On Tv	 Damnit, I'm a doctor, I'm not God.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, there goes my whole belief system.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 It's Erica.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh my God, quick turn off the TV.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No no no, wait, I wanna see what happens.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, I get Leslie out of the coma and then we make out.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well how can that be, you were just kissing Sabrina?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Rachel, it's a world where Joey is a neuro-surgeon.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey Erica, c'mon in.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 How did you get here so fast, I just saw you in Salem?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right, they uh, they choppered me in. What's up?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Ohh, and I see you're having a little party too. Is she here, huh, huh?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Who?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Sabrina. I know about you two. I saw you today kissing in the doctor's lounge.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 It's not what you think, that was...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 You told me I was the only one. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Alright look, that's it. I don't think we should see each other anymore, alright.Look, I know I should have told you this a long time ago but I am not Drake Remore, OK.I'm not even a doctor, I'm an actor. I just pretend to be a doctor.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Oh my God. Do the people at the hospital know about this?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Somebody wanna help me out here?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, I know, I know. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 How, how can you be here and there.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 'Cause it's a television show.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Drake, what're you getting at?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 I'm not Drake.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 That's right, he's not Drake, he's Hans Remore, Drake's evil twin.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Is this true?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes, yes it is true. And I know this because, because he pretended to be Drake to,to sleep with me. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 And then he told me he would run away with me, and he didn't. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And you left the toilet seat up, you bastard. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Is all this true?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yes, I'm afraid it is. You deserve much better than me Erica. You deserve to be withthe real Drake, he's the one you fell in love with. Go to Salem, find him, he's the guyfor you.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 Oh Hans. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hans...Hans...Yo evil twin.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right. Goodbye Erica, good luck in Salem. Take care
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Erica	 I'll never forget you Hans. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 OK, alright, the people who threw the water.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Fired! Why?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 The library board has had a lot of complaints from parents about some of the stuff inyour songs.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I can't believe it. Did you tell your board about how kids want to hear the truth?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 No.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I see.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 Maybe if you just played some regular kiddie songs.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No. What do you, what do you want me to be, like some stupid, big, like, purpledinosaur?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rob	 I'm not saying you have to be Barney.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Who's Barney.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, I tracked down Marcel and get this, he's healthy, he's happy, and he's righthere in New York filming Outbreak II - The Virus Takes Manhattan.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You're kidding.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 This is amazing.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 I know.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 I finally get a part on TV and the monkey's makin' movies.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK, Rachel, I'm ready.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Kid	 Excuse me. Is this where the singing lady is that tells the truth?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Um, yeah I guess that's me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Kid	  She's here.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Sometimes men love women,
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 This is so exciting, I haven't seen my monkey in almost a year.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What, you never look down in the shower? Oh please. I'm not allowed to make onejoke in the monkey-is-penis genre?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Security Guard	 C'mon people, back up please, back up, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh, excuse me, uh, where can we find the monkey?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Security Guard	 I'm sorry guys, closed set.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh, I'm sorry, you don't understand, I'm, I'm, I'm a friend of his. We uh, we usedto live together.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Security Guard	 Yeah, and I have a time share in the Pocanos with Flipper.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ross, there he is.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey, hey buddy, Marcel. Marcel. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Security Guard	 Uh, excuse me folks this is a uhh...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Closed set. We know but we're friends with the monkey. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Good morning. Hey pal, look who I brought. It's your old friend Harry Elefante.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Woah, dude, burn.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 I don't get it, he seemed so happy to see me yesterday.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Trainer	 Hey don't take it personal, he's under a lot of pressure, ya know, starring in amovie and all.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Now just how big of a star is Marcel?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Trainer	 In human terms, I'd say Cybill Shepard.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Woah.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	  So, are you guys in the movie, or areyou just really paranoid.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 Hey Sal, Jerry wants to know if the monkey's ready for the subwayset?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, excuse me. Jerry is the director, which one's he?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 The one in the director's chair.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Gotcha. Phoebs, walk with me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK. Um, how come I'm walking with you?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, we're, we're just goin' over here so that we can get away from the horribleflesh eating virus, for the love of God woman, listen to me. Is he lookin', is helookin'?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 We've got a problem.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 Tell me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 I can't do Chris's makeup. She refuses to acknowledge that she has a moustasche.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 Is it bad?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 It looks like one of her eyebrows fell down. Now unless someone convinces her tolet me bleach it, Jean-Claude Van Damme is gonna be making out with Gabe Kaplan.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 I'll talk to her.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 I hate actors.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Nice camoflauge man, for a minute there I almostdidn't see ya.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Excuse me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ahhhh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Uh, is your name Chandler?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Uh, yes, yes it is.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Chandler Bing?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Do you know me or are you just really good at this game?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 I'm Susie Moss. Fourth grade, glasses, I used to carry around a box of animalcrackers like a purse. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Susie Moss, right, yeah, wow, you look. . . great job growing up.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 It's nice to see you're not still wearing that denim cap with all the littlemirrors on it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, right, well yeah, I graduated fourth grade and realized I wasn't a pimp.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Remember the class play? You, you pulled up my skirt and the entire auditorium sawmy underpants.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes, back then I, uh, used humor as a defense mechanism. Thank God I don't dothat anymore.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What what what what?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Jean-Claude Van Damme. I didn't know he was in this movie, he is so hot.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ya think?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 The muscles from Brussels, wham bam Van Damme, did you see Time Cop?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, was he any good in it?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Rachel, he like, totally changed time.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Wow, so why don't you go talk to him?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, yeah.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worstthat could happen?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 He could hear me.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, I'm doin' it for ya.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh Rachel don't, don't you dare, don't, don't. Tell him I cook.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Excuse me. Hi.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Hi.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks bythe way, um, she thinks you're cute.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 You don't think I'm cute?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I, I don't know, um, do you think you're cute? OK, we're kinda gettin' off thetrack here. Um, I was supposed to come here and tell you my friend thinks you're cute. Sowhat should I tell her?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 You can tell her I think her friend is cute.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No, Stephen Hurs was the kid who would eat anything for money, David Stein wasthe guy who had no elbows.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 OK, well then who was the kid that got caught masturbating?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 OK that's not what he was doing. Alright, he was looking for his bus money.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Oh that's me, I gotta go.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh uh, o, OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Um, so listen, how many times am I gonna have to touch you on the arm before youask me on a date.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, uh, let's try one more. . . there you go, say Ernie's, 8 o'clock.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 I'll be there, and who knows, if things go well, maybe this time I'll get to seeyour underwear.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No one was around to hear that?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 So what'd he say?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Agh, what a jerk. I kept talking about you and he kept asking me out. I mean,naturally, you know, I said no.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, thanks anyway.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 He just kept asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Rachel if you, if you want to go out with him, you can. Sound like a big jerk tome but if that's what you want to do...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Jean-Claude she said yes, I'll see you tonight. Thank you.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And then Jean-Claude took me to that place Crossroads and that's where we hung outwith Drew Barrymore.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh man, she's so smokin, she has got the greatest set of. . . no guys around, huh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Does anybody need anything?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, I'll have an espresso. Oh acutally, I'll get it. If I ask you to, you'llprobably end up drinking it yourself.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 That is so unfair.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know. Oh, like you would drink her coffee after what you did to her with VanDamme.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey Joey I have to cancel racketball for tonight, that was Marcel's trainer. He'sgonna let me have him for a couple of hours.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 You're blowin' me off for a monkey?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey, we can rescedule for Saturday.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, unless you hook up with a bunch of pigeons.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey, stick a fork in me, I am done.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Stick a fork what?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Like, when you're cooking a steak.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, OK, I don't eat meat.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well then, how do you know when vegetables are done?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well you know, you juist, you eat them and you can tell.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 OK, then, eat me, I'm done.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I've met the perfect woman. OK, we're sitting on her couch, we're foolingaround, and then suddenly she turns to me and says, 'Do you ever want to do it in anelevator?'
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 What did you say?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ahh, I believe my exact words were, 'Flaign,en - sten'. I mean I didn't knowwhat to say, how do you know if you wanna do it on an elevator?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, you just know.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Oh, shoot, we gotta go, got a reservation in 30 minutes.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh no no no no, no no no no no no, you see, what I had planned shouldn't takemore that 2, 3 minutes tops.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Oh, 200 seconds of passion. We gotta go.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 But um, here's an idea, have you ever worn women's underwear?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, ye, yes, actually, but, uh, they were my Aunt Edna's, and there were threeof us in there.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Well I was thinking it would be um, kind of sexy if you wore mine tonight, atdinner.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You want me to wear your panties?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Could ya?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, if I was wearing your underwear then, uh, what would you be wearing?. . .You're swell.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 OK, got the music, got the dinner. Oh and check it out, I made Marcel's favoritedish, banannacake.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oooh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 With mealworms.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yaaahhh. Ahhh, candles. What'dya thinks gonna happen here tonight?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hello. Oh hi, are you on your way ove-. Oh. No, no, I, I understand, I mean amonkey's gotta work. No it, it's no big deal, it' not like I uh, had anything specialplanned. Yeah OK, OK. OK, OK, bye.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK, Rachel, why don't you start talking first.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Alright, I feel that this is totally unjustified.  She gave me the green light, I did nothing but-. Do you think I can't seeyou in the TV set?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Alright Monica, if there is something that you would like to share...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ya know, you had no right to go out with him.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 That is the most ridiculous.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 You sold me out.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I did not sell you out.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yes you did. Absolutely.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Would you let me talk. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Did you just flick me?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus- 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Quit flicking 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ow, you stop flicking.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 You flicked me first.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 OK, now I'm gonna kick some ass.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica, Rachel	 Ow. Ow. Ow.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, what do you, you want me to stop seeing him, is that what you want?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Uh-huh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You want me to just call him up and tell him that you're seeing him instead?That's what you want?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh that's what you want.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yes.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Fine.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Fine,
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be, like, mybitches.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thanks for letting me tag along tonight you guys.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Forget about it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 How you doin there squirmy?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm hangin in. . . and a little out.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 So, assistant to the director. That's a really exciting job, I mean, you must have aton of cool responsibilities.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director'S Assistant	 I have nothing to do with casting.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 So what're you guys gonna eat?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 How come all I can think about is putting that ice in my mouth and licking you allover?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Because I went to an all boys high school and God is making up for it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 I want you right here, right now.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Right now, right here. Don't ya think we're in kind of a public plaaaa  They do have the shrimp.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Meet me in the bathroom. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm going to the bathroom now. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 C'mon.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I can't believe we're doing this.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Alright mister, let's see those panties.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Alrighty. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Ooh. Ooh. But ya know what would be even sexier?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 If you didn't have your shirt tucked into them.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Alright. Now I would like to see you wearing nothing but them. Take your clothesoff.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 OK, but uh, I hope you realize this means we're gonna miss hearing about thespecials.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 C'mon hurry, hurry.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey, do you want this done quick, or do you want this done right?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Alright, turn around. Time to see you from behind.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Oh, somebody's been doing his buns of steel video.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, you want me to uh, clench anything, or-... Susie? Susie.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 This is for the fourth grade.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Huh? Where, whaddya mean?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Whaddo I mean. Whaddya mean, whaddo I mean? I mean underpants, mister, that's whatI mean.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What, what's what you mean?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 My skirt, you lifted, kids laughing. I was Susie Underpants 'till I was 18.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That was in the fourth grade. How could you still be upset about that?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Susie	 Well um, why don't you call me in 20 years and tell me if you're still upset aboutthis. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Alright, I hope you realize you're not getting these underpants back.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't believe this, just like 2 weeks ago I was watching Sudden Death,now I'm on a date with Jean-Claude Van Damme. Can you beat up that guy?  Can youbeat up that guy?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Sure.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 This is so wild. Ya know, I gotta admit, I was kinda surprised that you agreed togo on a blind date.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Normally, I would not do it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, what made you make the exception for me?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 'Cause Rachel told me uh, you were dying to have a threesome with me and uh,Drew Barrymore. By the way, Drew has some groundrules and...
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Say you're sorry.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Say it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Rachel, you say you're sorry or your sweater gets it.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Say you're sorry.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, you wanna play? OK, let's play, let's play. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 What're you gonna do?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You give me back my sweater or it's handbag marinara.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 You don't have the guts.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh yeah. Well, at least I wasn't too chicken to tell some guy I thought he wascute.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh alright, stop, STOP THE MADNESS. This is crazy. Who can even rememberwhy this even started in the first place?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yes that's right. But still, I-, look at your purse, look at your sweater, look atyourselves.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'll help you fix your sweater.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I'll help you throw out your purse.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'm sorry that I made you stop seeing him.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I'm sorry I went out with him when I knew you liked him.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'm sorry that I borrowed your gloves 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Joey?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ma?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Joey!
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Chandler? What're you still doin' here, I though you guys took off.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, no no no, she took off with my clothes.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Are you naked in there?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Not exactly. . . I'm wearin panties.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Huh, you uh, you always wear panties?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No, no, this is the first time.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wow, talk about your bad luck, I mean, the first time you try panties and someonewalks off with your clothes.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I was not trying them out, Susie asked me to wear them.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, let me see.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No. I'm not letting you or anybody else see, ever.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Alright, alright.  Woah,someone's flossing.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	  Joey, some people don't like that.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Chandler's wearing panties.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? Let me see. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No, no, you don't have to see.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi Tushie.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Alright, one of you give me your underpants.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Can't help you, I'm not wearing any.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How can you not be wearing any underwear?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, I'm gettin' heat from the guy in the hot pink thong.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Alright look Ross I'll give you 50 dollars for your underpants.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	All	 Hi.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey Phoebs, can I have the milk after you?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I'm almost done with it, keep your panties on.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, hey, and I'm in the movie.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 What happened?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 One of the virus victims called in sick, so Cathy recommended me and boom, I'm dyingon the gurney. Oh Ross, Marcel just finished his last scene if you want to go down thereand say goodbye.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ahh, oh that's OK, I mean, he's probably got, you know, parties to go to and stuff.But, ya know, he's moved on. Hey, that, that's the way it goes right.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh my God.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	  or youand me. Drew was very disappointed.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, well, bye. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Goodbye.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, bye for me too. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 OK, well, bye-bye again. 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 OK.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Perhaps, uh, the three of us, just could. . .
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica, Rachel	 Oh, no no no no no.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Are you sure, I can crush a walnut with my butt.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica, Rachel	 No no no no.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Impressive.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica	 But no. Maybe if I were baking.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Monica, Rachel	 Bye-bye.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Ross	 Bye Marcel. See ya on the big screen. You keep people drinkin' that beer, OK. I missyou buddy.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You know, I think I want to write a song about all this.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah. Oh, except one of the strings on my guitar is broken. Hey, Chandler, can Iborrow your G-string?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How long you been waitin' to say that?
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 About 20 minutes. CLOSING CREDITS 
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dying.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aaaaagggghhhhh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director	 Cut.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dying.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aaaaagggghhhhh.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director	 Cut.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dying.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aaaaagggghhhhh. Mommy
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Director	 Cut.
02	12-13	0212-13	The One After The Superbowl, Part I & 2	Van Damme	 Can't you see what's going on here, this man is dead.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Hey.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Hey. Hold on a second.  Huh?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Nice, nice. Hey I got somethin' for you. [hands Chandler an envelope.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 What's this?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Eight hundred and twelve bucks.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well, I don't know what Big Leon told ya but it's an even thousand if you wantme for the whole night. What is this for?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Well, I'm makin money now and this is payin' you back for head shots, electricbills, and so many slices of pizza I can't even count. I love ya man.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well, thanks man. Now I can get my pony.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Hey, this is a little extra somethin' for uh, ya know, always bein' there for me.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Wow, I don't know what to say.  Wow, I, I don't know what to say.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Heh, what d'ya say?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 I don't know. It's a bracelet.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Isn't it? And it's engraved too, check it out.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	  Thanks best bud.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Put it on.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Oh, now? 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Oh, no no, that's the beauty part, it goes with everything. Ohhh man, you are so wearin' that bracelet.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 I so am.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 You have any idea what this'll do for your sex life?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well, it'll probably slow it down at first but, once I get used to the extraweight, I'll be back on track.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Well, this all looks good.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Great.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 And if I want to call for a reference on your last job?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh, that's there on the bottom, see the manager, Chandler Bing.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Alright, lets see if you're as good in person as you are on paper. Make me asalad.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 A salad? Really I, I could do something a little more complicated if you like.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 No, just a salad will be fine.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 You got it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Now, I want you to tell me what you're doing while you're doing it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Alright, well I'm tearing the lettuce.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Uh-huh. Is it dirty?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Don't, I like it dirty.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 That's your call.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 So, uh, what are you going to do next?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Are they, uh, firm?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 They'r alright.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 You sure they haven't gone bad? You're sure they're not very, very bad?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 No really, they're OK.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 You gonna slice them up real nice?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Interviewer	 Aaaahhhhhhh.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 I'm outa here. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Y-ello. No, Rachel's not here right now, can I take a message?Alright, and how do we spell Casey, is it like at the bat or and the Sunshine Band? OK,bye-bye. Hey, who's this uh, this Casey?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Oh, some guy she met at the movies.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh really? What uh, what does he want with her?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well, I'm guessing he wants to do a little dance. . . ya know, make a littlelove. . . well pretty much get down tonight.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	  I don't know, I don't get, I don't get it, Imean, wh, wh, two months ago Rachel and I were like, this close. Right now, what, I'mtakin messages from guys she, she meets at the movies? I mean this, this Casey should betakin' down my messages, ya know, or, or, Rachel and I should be together and, and weshould get some kind of me, message service.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Hang in there, it's gonna happen.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Wha, OK, now how do you know that?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Because she's your lobster.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Oh, she's goin' somewhere.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 C'mon you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life.You know what, you can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, yaknow, holding claws like. . .
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Hey, you feelin' better?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Yeah, I think that fifth shower actually got the interview off me.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 So, do you have any other possibilities?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh yeah, well there's the possibility that I won't make rent.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Monica, if you want, I can lend you some money.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 No no no, if I couldn't pay you back right away then I'd feel guilty and tenseevery time I saw you.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh OK. Well then why don't you, uhh, why don't you borrow it from mom and dad? Youfeel guilty and tense around them already. You might as well make some money off of them.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Ya know, the man's got a point. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 What is that sparkly thing?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 That thing, it's a uhh. . . yeah it's, it's a little flashy.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 No no, no no, it's not flashy, not for a Goodfella.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Man, man that is sharp. It must have cost you quite a few debloons.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Hi.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Hi.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Hi darling.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 So, what's this.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Some of your old stuff.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Well sweetie, we have a surprise for you. We're turning your room into a gym.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Wow, that is a surprise. Just one little question, uh, why not Ross's room?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Gosh, we talked about that but your brother has so many science trophies andplaques and merit badges, well we didn't want to disturb them.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh, God forbid.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, hi Rachel.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Hi.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, we were so sorry to hear about your parents splitting up, dear.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh, well, you know, they're just separated so, you know, never know, we'll see.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Well, I can't say any of us were surprised. Your parents have been unhappyever since we've known them. Especially after that incident in Hawaii.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What, what incident?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Uhh, naa, no no no, I, I must be thinking of someone else, uh, maybe me. Don'tyou have some folding to do? Go fold dear. Fold. You fold. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Do you want a refill?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 No, I'm alright, thanks.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 OK. Ooh, OK, you gotta give me a second, I wanna get thisjust right.  Dude, 11 o'clock, totally hot babe checkin' you out. That was reallygood, I think I'm ready for my penis now.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	  I know what you're thinking, Dave Thomas, founder ofWendy's.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Gail	 I'm Gail.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Chandler. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Gail	 I, I really have to be somewhere but it was nice meeting you.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 What?  Oh this is excellent.You know he coulda gotten me a VCR, he coulda gotten me a set of golf clubs, but no, hehas to get me the woman repeller, the eyesore from the Liberace house of crap.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 It's not that bad.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk around sporting somereject from the Mr. T collection. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Chandler, Chandler.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pitythe fool that. . .  That's actually good.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Would you look at that guy, I mean how long has he been talking to her. It's like,back off buddy she's a waitress not a geisha.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 I think she's OK.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	  Excuse me, are you Rachel?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 I'm Ross Geller. Wha, I'm, God in your add you said you were pretty but wow.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What are you, what are you doin'?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh, oh my God, is this the wrong day? I don't believe it, uh, well, hey, I guess ifit works out we'll, we'll have something to tell the grandkids.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Man	 Sure will. I've uh, gotta go. Take care.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 OK, see ya later, nice meeting you.  You're welcome.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 I was saving you.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Saving, saving, saving me from the pleasant conversation with the interesting man,saving me?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh, see from where I was sitting I uh. . .
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 But, you are.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Uh, uh, well you're, umm, you're my lobster.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 No no, you're uh, you're my lobster. See um, lobsters, uhh, in the tank when, whenthey're old, uhh, they get with, uhh, they walk around holding the claws. In the tank, yaknow, with, with the holding and. . . Uhh, Phoebs you wanna help me out with the, thewhole lobster thing?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Do the claws again.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Rach. OK, forget, forget the lobsters OK. We're, let's talk, what about us?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Ross, there is no us, OK.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 No, but. . .
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 No, listen to me. I fell for you and I get clobbered. You then fall for me and Iagain, somehow, get clobbered. I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just notworth it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Well, but, but. . .
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 NO but Ross. We are never gonna happen, OK. Accept that.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 E-except, except that what?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 No, no, ACC-cept that.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Hey man, look it's my best bud. How ya doin?  OK, that's my bad.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 If you hated the bracelet so much, Chandler, you should have just said so.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well, doesn't the fact that I wore the bracelet even though I hated it saysomething about our friendship and how much it means to me?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Well, what about the fact that you insulted the bracelet andyou made fun of me?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 OK, well that's the part where I'm a wank. But I was hoping we wouldn't focus onthat. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 You know what the. . . 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 I am here, on my knees, holding up these couch cushions asa symbol of my sorrow and regret, much like they did in biblical times. Though you mayhaveth anger now. . . 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 You know, that Steffi Graf has quite a tush. I'm just saying, it's rightthere.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Hey guys.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Hi, darling. Where's my grandson, you didn't bring him?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 No, he's at uh, Carol's and Susan's today.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 A woman in my office is a lesiban. I'm just saying.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, Jack look, there's that house paint commercial that cracks you up. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Where have you been?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Emotional hell. So, did they lend you the money yet?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 No, but that's probably 'cause I haven't asked them yet.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 C'mon Monica, do it. Hey, you guys, um, Monica has some news.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Um, yeah, so uh, uhh, listen, I'm sorry I didn't tell youthis before but umm, I, I'm no longer at my job, I, I had to leave it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Why?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Because they made me.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 You were fired? What're you gonna do?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Judy, Judy, relax, this is our little harmonica we're talking about. We taughther well. Ten percent of your paycheck, where does it go?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica, Ross	 In the bank.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 There you go. So she dips into her savings, that's what it's there for. She'sgonna be fine, and if you need a little extra, you know where to find it. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Anything larger back there?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 I can't believe it.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Would you stop already? Get out of the bitter barn and playin the hay.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Oh, you're right I, I should play in the hay. Forget about the fact that I justdropped 400 dollars to replace a bracelet that I hated to begin with. Bring on the hay.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 Hey now you have two.  Oh, now you have two.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 What am I gonna do, huh? 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Hey.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Hey.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 How come you have two?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Well this one's for you.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Get out.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 No, I can't. No no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and I also knowthat this is about more than just jewelry,  best buds.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we'rebracelet buddies.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 That's what they'll call us.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Here you go, you can pay me back whenever you like.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 You have dinosaur checks?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Yeah, yeah I mean, you get your money and you learn a little something, what's wrongwith that?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Nothin', nothin', hey you're a cheapasaurus. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, thank you,I'm very greatful.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	  Hey, Mon, what is this?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from high school. I was uh,a little bigger then.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Oh, I thought that's what they used to cover Connecticut when it rained.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	  Hey Monica, what's on this video tape?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Hey, you got me, put it in.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	  Oh.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Hi.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Hi.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Over here Jack. OK. I see, Rachel's coming up the path. Oh doesn't shelook pretty. Jack, get this. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh my God.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 What is with your nose?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 They had to reduce it because of, of my deviated septum.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 OK, I was wrong, that's what they used to cover Connecticut.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 You know what this is, this is us getting ready for the prom.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	All	 Oh yeah we do. C'mon.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Over here dad. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Wait, how do you zoom out?  There she is.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Some girl ate Monica.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Ahh, so how many cameras are actually on you?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh, you look so great.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Ahh, so do you, beautiful. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oops.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 What?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Shoot, I think I got mayonaise on you.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh, that's OK, it's just the shoulder, it's not my dress.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Everybody smile.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Oh, dad, turn it off.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 It is off.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Dad, it is not. What's with the red light?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 It's the off light. Right Ross? 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Joey	 Lookin' good Mr. Cotter.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 You look pretty tonight.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh, thanks. So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Oh, you know, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna hang out, work on my music.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	  Is my hook unhooked?These things keep falling down, I can't. . .
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Uh, hold, let me see, I don't know. So what're you gonna do. . . 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh, the guys are here.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 this summer?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Chandler	 Work on your music?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Oh my God, look there's Roy Gublik.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Ya know, Roy saw Star Wars 317 times. His name was in the paper.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 Where's Chip, why isn't he here yet?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Roy	 He'll be here OK, take a chill pill. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 I just told Rachel that Roy touched my boob.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Roy	 Oh, I'm gonna kick Chip's ass.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	  I have a wonderful idea. You should take Rachel tothe prom.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Doubtful.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Jack, give me that. Talk to your son.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Your mother's right. Take her, you can wear my tux.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Dad, she won't want to go with me.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Of course she would, you're a college man.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 I don't know.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Well, c'mon. Don't ya want to find out?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel	 I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 OK. Hold my board.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Atta boy. 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 OK, you guys, ya know, I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	All	 No, no, no.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 OK, fine, well I'm not gonna watch, alright.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 C'mon kid, let's go.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Ahh, are you hadsome.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Let's show 'em.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Uh, just a sec dad.  OK dad.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Rachel, Monica, Roy, Chip	 Bye.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Press the button.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Which one? Which button, Jack.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 The button, the button.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 I can't believe you did that.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Ross	 Yeah, well.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Phoebe	 See, he's her lobster.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Dance with him.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Mom, I'm hungry.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Dance with your father.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 I may not know any of your flash dances but I'm no slouch on the dance floor.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Monica	 Alright.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, Jack.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Mr. Geller	 Oh, Judy. Oh, Judy.
02	14	0214	The One With The Prom Video	Both	 Oh, ohhhhh.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Alright, no peeking. No peeking, no peeking, no peeking.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Alright, alright, but you better be wearing clothes when I open my eyes.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Alright open your eyes. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Sweet mother of all that is good and pure.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Huh? Days of our Lives picked up my option.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Congratulations!
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 I know.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Now we can finally watch Green Acres the way it was meant to beseen.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Uh-huh.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 So uh, which one is mine?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Whichever one you want, man. Whichever one you want.  Not that one.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	  Ohh yes.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	  Ohh yeah, that's the stuff.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	  Do we dare?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 We dare.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Both	  AAAAHHHHHH.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 I can't believe two cows made the ultimate sacrifice so you guys could watch TVwith your feet up.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Well they were chair-shaped cows. They never would have survived in thewild.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 This screen is amazing, I mean Dick Van Dyke is practically life-size.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	All	 Woah!
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Rose Marie really belongs on a smaller screen, doesn't she?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi you guys.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	All	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hey you.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Hey you. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey	 Woah, hey, yo. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 So, uh, how was your day?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Oh you know, pretty much the usual, uh, sun shining, birds chirping.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Really? Mine too.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 Hey cool, mine too.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	  Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got to get to the museum. So um, I'll see youtonight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 OK. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Bye guys.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	All	 Bye.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	  Tonight?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey	 Hey, yo. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 What's tonight?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 It is our first official date. Our first date.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Uh, hello.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Tonight you're supposed to waitress for me, my catering thing, any of those wordstrigger anything for you?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 God, oh God Monica, I forgot. This is our first date.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Yes but my mom got me this job.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 OK, I can be a waitress, I can be a waitress.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. See Phoebe, Phoebe.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Really Phoebs? Because, you know, you'd have to be an actual waitress. This can'tbe like your 'I can be a bear cub' thing.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 I can be a waitress. OK watch this. Um, gimme two number ones, 86the bacon, one Adam and Eve on a raft and rick'em, la-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la-la.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 It's James Bond.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Sorry we're late.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Ah, that's OK, come on in. Um, I'm sorry, is Monica Geller coming? I was toldshe was.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Dr. Burke, it, it's me.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Monica? My God you used to be so. . . I mean you, you, you, you must have lostlike. . . You look great.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Thank you. This is my friend Phoebe. She's gonna be helping me tonight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Hi Phoebe, nice to meet you.  So, how yabeen?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I've been great, just great. How have you been? 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Oh, well obviously you know Barbara and I split up, otherwise you wouldn't havedone the head tilt.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 The head tilt?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yeah, since the divorce, when anybody asks me how I am, it's always with asympathetic head tilt.  'How ya doin'? You OK?'
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I'm sorry.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 No no, it, it's fine, believe me. I do it too. I always answer with the 'I'mOK' head bob.  'Yeah, I'mfine.' Hey listen, I've got to set up the music. I got a new CD changer, of course thedivorce only left me with 4 CD's to change.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	  Oh, that's too bad.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	  I'll survive.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Uh, two larges, extra cheese on both. But listen, don't ring the buzzer for 19,ring 20, Geller-Green, they'll let you in, OK. If you buzz our door, there's no tip foryou. OK, thanks. Pizza's on the way. I told you we wouldn't have to get up.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 What if we have to pee?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 I'll cancel the sodas.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 You've got to get back out there, it's your party.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 But they're so dull, they're all opthamologists.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 You're an opthamologist.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Only because my parents wanted me to be, I wanted to be a sherrif.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	  That's funny, no. Cadillac, cataract, I getit, no I get it, you stay out there.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 See.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Alright, I'll tell you what. I'll come get you in 5 minutes with some sort of um,kabob emergency.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 OK. You better. Oh God, here we go. Hey wanna see 'em go nuts? Watch this.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 You are so smitten.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I am not.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 Oh, you are so much the smitten kitten. You should ask him out.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Dr. Burke? I don't think so. I mean, like, he's a grown up.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 So. You two are totally into each other.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Phoebe, he's a friend of my parents. He's like 20 years older than me.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 OK, so what, you're just never gonna see him again?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Not never. I mean, I'm gonna see him tomorrow at my eye appointment.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 Didn't you like, just get your eyes checked?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Well yeah, but, you know, uh, 27 is a dangerous eye age.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 C'mon, I'm not saying it was a bad movie, I'm just saying, you know, it was alittle. . . hard to follow.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 I told you there was going to be sub-titles.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 I know, I just didn't want to wear my glasses on my first date.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Monica.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 It would really help when I'm kissing you if you didn't shout out my sister's name.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Honey, I'm just checking.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Oh.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Monica.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Mon.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Monica.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Mon.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 What, what.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 I'm sorry. Oh God, I'm sorry, it's just that when you moved your hands down to mybutt, it was like woah, Ross's hands are on my butt. Sorry.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 And that's, that's funny why?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Well it's not, honey I'm sorry, I guess I'm just nervous. I mean, it's you, yaknow, it's us. I mean, we're crossing that line, sort of a big thing.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 I, I know it's big, I just didn't know it was uh, ha-ha big.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 OK. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 OK, my hands were no where near your butt.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 I know, I know, I know, I know. I was just thinking about when they were there thelast time, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. OK, OK, look, woah, I promise, I'm good, I'mnot gonna laugh anymore. OK put your hands back there.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No see now, now I can't because uh, I'm feeling too self conscious.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Just one cheek.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Nuh, uh, the moment's gone.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Alright, just put your hands out and I'll back up into them.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 That's romantic.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 C'mon touch it.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh, come on squeeze it.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Rub it.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh, come on, would you just grab my ass.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Wow, look at that. The car is on fire, yet somehow it's expensive paint job isprotected by the Miracle Wax.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 You got a Cheeto on your face man.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Hi.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 What're you doin' here? Aren't you supposed to be out with Rachel?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 That was 14 hours ago.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 So how'd it go?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Oh. Listen, have you ever been uh, you know, foolin' around with a girl and uh, shestarted laughin'?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Yeah, but uh, it was 1982 and my flock of seagulls haircut was tickling herchin.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 She laughed at you?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Yeah. I don't know, I've been wanting this since like ninth grade typing, ya know.And I just want it to be perfect and right and. . . why isn't that laser beam cuttingthrough the paint?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 It's the Miracle Wax.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 It certainly is a miracle.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi you guys.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi. Listen, I was um, thinkin' about. . .
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Listen can you guys uh, speak up, it's harder for us to hear you when you loweryour voice.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 OK, listen, I'm sorry about last night and I really want to make it up to you.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No, you, ya know there's no need to make it u. . . how?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine andthen uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Humm, that sounds, I don't, perfect.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 What's this.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Could you get us a couple of beers?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 I'm going to look into your eyes now.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Really.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yeah, that's my job. Alright, look up. . . look down, now open your eyes, nowlook down. That's right, look into the light. Now look at me. . . OK. Your eyes look good.Those are good eyes.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Good, they feel good, in my head.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 So, it's great to see ya.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 You too.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 You too.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 OK, um. Goodbye.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Drops!
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 What?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Drops. Here, they're free.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Thanks. So, I guess I better be going.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Oh, OK, yeah. I'll see ya later.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Thanks again.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 We have got to get you lazy boys out of these chairs.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey	 Hey, woah, hey, woah.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 You know you should go outside and be with the three-dimensional people.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 No, inside good, outside bad.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 You guys are so pathetic, I, oh, OH, XANADU! OH.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 She's one of us now.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi you guys.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey, Phoebe	 Hey.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Well we just wanted to stop by and uh, say goodnight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler, Joey, Phoebe	 Goodnight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Look at that, they won't even turn their heads.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Alright you guys, I'm takin' off my shirt.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	  Naa, she's lyin'.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Stop sending food to our apartment.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Well, why're you all dressed up?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 You're not the only one who has a date tonight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 What? You have a date? Who with?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 No one.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 C'mon, what's his name?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Nothing.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Come on, tell me.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Alright, but I'm very excited about this OK, so you gotta promise you won't getall big-brothery and judgmental.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Oh, I promise, what.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 It's Richard Burke.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Who's Richard Burke? Doc, Doctor Burke? You have a date with Doctor Burke? Why, why,why should that bother me? I, I love that man, he's like a uh, brother to dad.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Well for your information he happens to be one of the brightest, mostsophisticated, sexiest men I've ever been with.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Doctor Burke is sexy?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel, Phoebe	 Oh God, absolutely.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	  It's the museum again, can I, oh.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Ya know, Dr. Burke kissed me once.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 When?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 When I was um, 7, I crashed my bike right out in front of his house and to stop mefrom crying he kissed me right here. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Phoebe	 Oh you are so lucky.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 I know.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	  Woah, woah, woah australopithicus isn't supposed to be in thatdisplay. No. No. No, n, homo-habilus was erect, australopithicus was never fully erect.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Well maybe he was nervous.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Oh look, I can't believe this. Look, homo-habilus hasn't even learned how to usetools yet and they've got him here wi, with clay pots. Why don't, why don't they just givehim a microwave? I'm sorry, I'm sorry this is taking so long, ya know, I, I, it's justit's longer than I expected, we will have dinner.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 It's OK, it's fine.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 KARL!
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Wow, is that Michelle?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yep.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I've not seen her since high school graduation. Oh my God, that night she got sodru. . . motional.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Ya know, she's having another baby.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I thought she just had one.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 No no. Henry's almost two and he's talking and everyting. Here. You know, theother day he told me he liked me better than his other grandpa. Now in all fairness hisother grandpa's a drunk but still. . .
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Oh, you're a grandpa.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yeah. Are we nuts here?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 I don't know, maybe. I mean I'm dating a man who's pool I once peed in.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 I didn't need to know that. I guess 21 years is a lot. I mean, hell, I'm awhole person who can drink older than you.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Yeah.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 So.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 So maybe we should just. . .
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yeah, yeah, maybe.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Wow, this really sucks.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 Yeah, it sure does. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Well, we don't really have to decide anything right now, do we?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Dr. Burke	 No, no, there's no rush or anything.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Delivery Guy	 Pizza delivery.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Monica	 Oh, I'm gonna kill those guys.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Rach.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 I'm done.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Yeah well, you know what, so is uh, Sorentino's.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Wha, OK, I'm sorry, let's uh, why don't we find someplace else.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 No, you know what, it's late, everything's gonna be closed. Why don't we just doit another night?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 No, no, we won't.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 We won't?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	  C'mon.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 OK, that's dead right?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 What is this? What are we doing?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Shh. Do you want cran-apple or cran-grape?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Grape.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh, God.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Sorry.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Ah, so what are we looking at?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Well uh, you see that, that little cluster of stars next to the big one? That isUrsa Major.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Really?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 You're not laughing.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 This time it's not so funny.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Oh, thank God.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 Hi.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 Hi you. I can't believe I'm waking up next to you.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 I know it is pretty unbelievaaaaah.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Rachel	 What?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Ross	 We're not alone. 
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Is that the fire alarm?
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Chandler	 Yeah.  Oh it's not warm yet, we still have time.
02	15	0215	The One Where Ross And Rachel... You Know	Joey	 Cool. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Man this is weird. You ever realize Captain Crunch's eyebrows are actually on hishat?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 That's what's weird? Joey, the man's been captain of a cereal for thelast 40 years.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Waaa-aaah.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 What?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 The spoon. You licked and-and you put. You licked and you put.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Yeah, so.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well don't you see how gross that is? I mean that's like you using mytoothbrush.  You used my toothbrush?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well, that was only 'cause I used the red one to unclog the drain.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Mine is the red one! Oh God. Can open, worms everywhere.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey, why can't we use the same toothbrush, but we can use the same soap?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Because soap is soap. It's self-cleaning.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Alright, well next time you take a shower, think about the last thing I wash and thefirst thing you wash.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica, Phoebe	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Ooh, look at you fancy lads. What's the occasion?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well, you know that guy that's on my show that's in a coma? He's havin' a brunch.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Ahh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	  OK, ready when you are.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Okey-doke.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 I can't believe you guys are actually getting tattoos.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Excuse me, you guys are getting tattoos?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Yes, but you can not tell Ross 'cause I want to surprise him.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Wow, this is wild. What're you gonna get?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Um, I'm getting a lily for my Mom. 'Cause her name's Lily.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Wow, that's lucky. What if her name was Big Ugly Splotch?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 So where you gettin' it?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I think on my shoulder. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 What? What's on your shoulder?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Um, a chip. A tattoo, I'm getting a tattoo.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 A tattoo? Why, why would you want to do that?  Hi.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Hi. Well hey, you don't - you don't think they're kind of cool?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 No, sorry I don't. Tell me why would anyone pay someone to scar their body for life?What if it doesn't come out right Phoebe? Then it's like, I don't know, havin' a bad haircut all the time. Why's everyone staring at me?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Ross, come sign this birthday card for dad. Rich is gonna be here any minute.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Oooh, Rich is goin' to the party too, huh?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Well, he's my parents' best friend, he has to be there.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Oh, is today the day you're gonna tell them about you two?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Yeah. It's my dad's birthday, I decided to give him a stroke.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 No, I think you should tell them.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 No, I don't even know how serious he is about me. Until I do, I'm not telling themanything.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 I don't know, I don't think mom and dad would mind. Remember when you were 9 andRichard was 30, how dad used to say, 'God I hope they get together.'
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Alright, shall we?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 OK, wait, wait, wait, wait. You know what? Ross, let's - let's switch places. Youget in the middle. No un-, ya know, unless this looks like we're trying to cover somethingup.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Monica, Monica, you could come in straddling him, they still wouldn't believe it. We're here.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Oh hi kids. Hi darling.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Happy birthday dad.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Oh thank you.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Hi ma.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Happy birthday.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Well, you kids thank Dr. Burke for the ride?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Uh, actually mom, I think Monica thanked him for the both of us.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Friend	 Well, you kids take the train in?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 No, Richard Burke gave them a ride.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Friend	 Oh. Speaking of whom, I hear he's got some 20-year-old twinkie in the city.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Finger cramp. Oh God, sorry. Here, let me get that mom.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Sooo, Richard's shopping in the junior section.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Are we still on that?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 We just know she's got the IQ of a napkin.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Friend	 She's probably not even very pretty, just young enough so that everything is stillpointing up. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Can you believe this place?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 I know, this is a great apartment.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Ah, I was just in the bathroom, and there's mirrors on both sides of you. So whenyou're in there it's like you're peein' with the Rockettes.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Wow, there's my fantasy come true. No, seriously.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey'S Co-Star	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey! We were just sayin', great apartment man.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey'S Co-Star	 Thanks. You want it?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Huh?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey'S Co-Star	 Yeah, I'm movin' to a bigger place. You should definitely take this one.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Yeah, can you see me in a place like this?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey'S Co-Star	 Why not? You hate park views and high ceilings? C'mon I'll show you thekitchen.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	  Oh that's all right fellas, I saw a kitchen this morning -on TV. Stop talking. OK.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 C'mon, tell us.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Friend	 Yeah, is she really 20.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 I am not telling you guys anything.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 C'mon Rich, it's my birthday, let me live vicariously.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Dad, you really don't want to do that.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Ahh, what's a little mid-life crisis between friends?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Jack, would you let it go?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Look, I know what you're going through. When I turned 50 I got the Porsche.You... you got your own little speedster.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Guys. Seriously, it is not like that.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Tell you what, maybe one of these weekends you can borrow the car and I cou. ..
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Dad, I beg you not to finish that sentence.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 What? I'm kidding. You know I'd never let him touch the Porsche.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK Rach, which, which lily? This lily or that lily?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Well I. . .
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I like this lily. It's more open, ya know, and that's like my mom. She had a moreopen, giving spirit. Ooh, Foghorn Leghorn, ooh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Tattoo Artist	 Alright, blonde girl, you're in room two, not so blonde girl, you're withme.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Here we go.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	  Uh-huh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 You're not going?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 What? Is it - is this 'cause of what Ross said?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 No. Well, yeah, maybe.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I don't believe this. Is this how this relationship's gonna work? Ross equalsboss. I mean, c'mon what is this, 1922?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 What's 1922?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Just, you know, long time ago. Well, when men used to tell women what to do - alot. And then there was suffrage, which is a good thing but is sounds horrible. Do youwant to get this tattoo?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. . .
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK, hey, HEY. Is your boyfriend the boss of you?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 No.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK, who is the boss of you?!!
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 You?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 No. You are the boss of you. Now you march your heinie in there and get that hearttattooed on your hip. GO!!
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 How ya doin'?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 I'm a twinkie.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Really? I'm a hero.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Oh, this is so hard.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Yeah, I know. I hate it too. Look, maybe we should just tell them.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Maybe we should just tell your parents first.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 My parents are dead.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 God, you are so lucky. I mean, I mean. . . you know what I mean.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 I know, I know. Just hang in there, OK. OK, I'll go out first, alright.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Alright.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	  Judy, going to the bathroom, good for you.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Thank you Richard, I appreciate the support.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Honey. Honey, have you seen my Harmon Kilerbrew bat? Bob doesn't believe Ihave one.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 I have no idea. Did you know Richard has a twinkie in the city?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 I know. He's like a new man. It's like a scene from Cocoon.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 I just never would have pictured Richard with a bimbo.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Apparently, he told Johnny Shapiro that she's quite a girl. In fact, he toldJohnny that he thinks he's falling in love with her.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Really.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 I tell you, I've never seen him this happy.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 So Jack, you ever think about trading me in for a younger model?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Of course not. With you it's like I've got two 25-year-olds.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	  Oh Jack stop.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 C'mon, it's my birthday.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Can we drop this? I am not interested in the guy's apartment.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Oh please, I saw the way you were checking out his mouldings. You want it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Why would I want another apartment, huh? I've already got an apartment that I love.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well it wouldn't kill you to say it once in a while.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Alright, you want the truth? I'm thinkin' about it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 What?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 I'm sorry. I'm 28 years old, I've never lived alone, and I'm finally at a placewhere I've got enough money that I don't need a roommate anymore.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Woah, woah, woah. I don't need a roommate either, OK? I can afford to live hereby myself. Ya know, I may have to bring in somebody once a week to lick the silverware.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 What're you gettin' so bent out of shape for, huh? It's not like we agreed to livetogether forever. We're not Bert and Ernie.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Look, you know what? If this is the way you feel, then maybe you should take it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well that's how I feel.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well then maybe you should take it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well then maybe I will.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Fine with me.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Great. Then you'll be able to spend more quality time with your real friends, thespoons.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Who's drink can I freshen?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Almost time for cake.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Mon, Mon, are you OK?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 You remember that video I found of mom and dad?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Yeah.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Well, I just caught the live show.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Eww.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Hey there.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 What?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Nothing, I just heard something nice about you.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Humm, really?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Richard. Richard. Your son isn't seeing anyone is he?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Uhh, not that I know of.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Well, I was thinking, why doesn't he give Monica a call?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 That - that's an idea.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Well, actually, I'm already seeing someone.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Oh?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Oh?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Ohh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 She never tells us anything. Ross, did you know Monica's seeing someone?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Mom, there are so many people in my life. Some of them are seeing people and some ofthem aren't. Is that crystal?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 So, who's the mystery man?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Well, uh, he's a doctor.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 A real doctor?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 No, a doctor of meat. Of course he's a real doctor. And he's handsome, and he'ssweet, and know you'd like him. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Well that's wonderful. . . I
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Mom, it's OK.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 It is Judy.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Jack. Could you come in here for a moment? NOW!
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	  Found it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 I'll take that dad. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 It seems your daughter and Richard are something of an item.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 That's impossible, he's got a twinkie in the city.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Dad, I'm the twinkie.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 You're the twinkie?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 She's not a twinkie.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Al-alright, l-look you guys, this is the best relationship I've been in. . .
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mrs. Geller	 Oh please, a relationship.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Yes, a relationship. For your information I am crazy about this man.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Really?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Yes.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 Am I supposed to stand here and listen to this on my birthday?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Dad, dad this is a good thing for me. Ya know, and you even said yourself, you'venever seen Richard happier.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Mr. Geller	 When did I say that?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Upstairs in the bathroom right before you felt up mom.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Oh that looks so good, oh I love it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 I know, so do I. Oh Phoebe, I'm so glad you made me do this. OK, lemme se yours.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Ahh. OK, let's see yours again.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Phoebe we just saw mine, let me see yours.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Oh OK.  Oh no, oh it's gone,that's so weird, I don't know how-where it went.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 You didn't get it?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 No.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Why didn't you get it?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Phoebe, how would you do this to me? This was all your idea.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I know, I know, and I was gonna get it but then he came in with this needle anduh, di-, did you know they do this with needles?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Really? You don't say, because mine was licked on by kittens.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Hey.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey listen, I'm sorry about what happened. . .
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Yeah me too.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 I know. Yeah.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Yeah. So do we need to hug here or. . .
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 No, we're alright.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 So I got ya something. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Plastic spoons. Great.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Lick away my man.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 These'll go great in my new place. You know, 'till I get real ones.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 What?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well, I can't use these forever. I mean, let's face it, they're no friend to theenvironment.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 No-no, I mean what, what's this about your new place?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 I'm movin' out like we talked about.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well I didn't think that was serious.  Ya know I thoughtthat was just a fight.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Well, it was a fight. . . based on serious stuff, remember. About how I never livedalone or anything. I just think it would be good for me, ya know, help me to grow or. . .whatever.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well, there you go.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey, are you cool with this. I mean, I don't want to leave you high and dry.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Hey, no, I've never been lower or wetter. I'll be fine. I'll just turn your, uh,bedroom into a game room or somethin', you know, put the foosball table in there.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Woah. Why do you get to keep the table?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 I did pay for half of it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Yeah. And uh, I paid for the other half.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Alright I'll tell you what, I'll play you for it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Alright, you're on. I can take two minutes out of my day to kick your ass.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Your little men are gonna get scored on more times than your sister.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Woah, woah, woah, woah. Which sister?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 So, are you sorry that I told them?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 No, it's been a long time since your dad and I went running.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Oh.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Oh. Well did you get it? Let me see.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Is Ross here?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 No he went out to get pizza.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Oh really, OK. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 That's great.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 Very tasteful.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 Wanna see mine, wanna see mine?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 Yes.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 What? You didn't get one.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK, well then what is this? 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Richard	 What're we looking at? That blue freckle?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK, that's my tattoo.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. I finally got her back in the chair,bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 OK, hi. For your information this is exactly what I wanted. This is a tattoo ofthe earth as seen from a great distance. It's the way my mother sees me from heaven.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Oh, what a load of crap. That is a dot. Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Wherethe hell is my lily, you wuss?' OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 You got a tattoo?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Maybe. But just a little one. Phoebe got the whole world.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Lemme see. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Well?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Well it's really. . . sexy. I wouldn't have thought it would be but. . . wow.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Really?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Yeah, so uh, is it sore or can you do stuff?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 I guess.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Hey, save us some pizza. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Get out of the corner. Pass it, pass it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Stop talkin' to your men. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Yes! And the table is mine.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Congratulations. 
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Hey, you guys are still gonna come visit me, right?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Oh yeah, you got the big TV. We'll be over there all the time. . .  except when we are here.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Phoebe	 I know you're just moving uptown but I'm really gonna miss you.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Monica	 I know, how can you not be accross the hall anymore.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Rachel	 Yeah, who's gonna eat all our food, and tie up our phone lines, and - is that mybra? What the hell you doin' with my bra?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Oh no-no, it's uh, it's not what you think. We uh, we used it to, you know, flingwater balloons off the roof. Remember that, those junior high kids couldn't even gettheirs accross the street.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	  Yeah, I remember.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Ross	 Hey, let's bring the rest of these down to the truck.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 So, uhh, em, you want me to uh, give you a hand with the foosball table?
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Naa, you keep it, you need the practice.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Thanks.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 So, I guess this is it.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Yeah, right, yeah, I guess so.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Listen, uh, I don't know when I'm gonna see you again.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Well, I'm guessing uh, tonight at the coffee house.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Joey	 Right, yeah. OK. Um, take care.
02	16	0216	The One Where Joey Moves Out	Chandler	 Yeah.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Huh? So whaddya think? Casa de Joey. Huh? I decorated it myself.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Get out.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 No.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	  Wow Joey, this is, uhh...
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Art.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Art it is.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	  Look, check this out. Is it acoffee table, is it a panther? There's no need to decide.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	  Hey, nice pillow. So now tell me, isthis genuine Muppet skin?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Hey, excellent, excellent water-table thing. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Thanks, yeah. I love this but ya know what, it makes me wanna pee.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Yeah, well me too, yeah. I think that's the challenge.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hey, how come, uhh, Chandler didn't come?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Well uh, it's cause he had a thing with, wi-, with the thing.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Right, I go-, I got it.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 So why don't ya show us the rest of your casa?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Yeah. Uh, oh, OH, the best part, c'mon.  Heh?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Hey, nice toilet.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 No no no, behind it.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Wha-, you have a phone in here?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 That's right, I have a phone in here.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Joey, promise me something.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Yeah.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Never call me from that phone.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 OK, here we go. Honey, I'm sorry, they were all out of apple pie, someone just gotthe last piece.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. You are not gonna believe this. I havejust been discovered.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Now wait a minute, I claimed you in the name of France four years ago.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Anyway, OK, now promise you won't like, freak out and say how great this is untilI'm done, OK.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 OK.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 OK. I just met this producer of this like, teeny record company, who said that Ihave a very fresh, offbeat sound and she wants to do a demo of Smelly Cat.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 I told you not to do that yet. And, she wants to do a video.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 I'm not done yet, OK. God. OK, if that goes well, they may even want to make analbum.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 I'm done now.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Oh God. Ross, OK, if you care about me at all, you will get the pie out of theman's hood.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Get the what?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Pie in the hood, pie in the hood. Go.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Guy	 What're you doing?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 I'm sorry, my pie was, was in your hood. Now I just have to get the coffee out ofthat guy's pants and I'll be back in the hospital by 7. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Damnit Ross, get your butt out of the bathroom.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Calm down, I'm blow drying.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Blow drying what, you have no hair.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 What's goin' on?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Your boyfriend has been in there for over an hour. I can't believe it, it's likeI'm living with him again. He's here when I go to sleep, he's here when I wake up, he'shere when I want to use the shower, ughh. It's like I'm sixteen all over again .
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Well, you're not sixteen, you're both adults now.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 GET OUT YOU DUFUS!!
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Or ya know, he's rubber and you're glue.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	  All yours.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I hope you cleaned your hair out of the drain.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	  I hope you cleaned your hair out of the drain.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Shut up.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	  Shut up.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Cut it out.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	  Mi-mi-mii.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	  I've never wanted you more.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 So, whaddya say boys, should I call him?  Well, ya know what they say. Ask your slippers a question... you'regoing crazy.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hello.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hey!
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Listen, I'm, I'm sorry I didn't make it over there today.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Oh, that's OK. You uh, you had a thing.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Yeah well, I hear the place looks great.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Ahh, forget about it, I'm havin' a ball. How's the apartment doin'
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh hey, it's, it's terriffic. I mean it's a regular space... fest.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Oh, well great.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Yeah I just... wanted to call and say hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Well OK then.  Was that the oven timer?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 That's right my friend. It's time for...
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Both	 Baywatch!! 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Oh, can you believe they gave Stephanie skin cancer?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 I still can't believe they promoted her to lieutenant.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Naa, you're just sayin' that 'cause you're in love with Yasmine Blepe.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well, how could anyone not be in love with Yasmine Blepe?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hey, hey, they're runnin'
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 See, this is the brilliance of the show. I say always keep them running. All thetime, running. Run. Run Yasmine, run like the wind.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 But I thought you wanted to live by yourself.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 I did. I thought it'd be great. I figured I'd have like, time alone with my thoughtsbut, ya know, it turns out I don't have as many thoughts as you'd think.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Joey, why don't you talk to Chandler about moving back?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 You really think he'd take me? I mean, we had a pretty good talk last night but,when I moved out, I hurt him bad.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I promise you, he would definitely want you back.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 I'm telling you, there's no way he's moving back.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 But we had one of the greatest talks we ever had last night. I mean it was, itwas like when we first started living together.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Look, I know you don't want to hear this right now but, we've seen him in his newplace, alright. And he's happy, he's, he's decorated.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Look, Chandler, he has moved on, OK, you have to too.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 But...
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 No. You're just gonna have to accept the fact that you're just friends now, OK,you're not... rommmates anymore.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Producer	 OK Phoebe, you ready to try one?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 OK.  Oh woah,oh my God. I mean like, who was that?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Producer	They're your backup singers... beind you.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 OH!! Oh I thought they were just watching me. You know, like at, like at anaquarium, ya know.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Producer	 Alrighty. From the top.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 OK. OK, sorry. I'm just, I'm just not getting that everyone um, gets how smelly this catacually is. I just think that maybe if we could talk about this, 'cause I need to feelthat you really care about the cat.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Producer	 Honey, uh we, we can talk about this. It's just that it's costing about ahundred dollars a minute to be in here.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh OK. So, um, the cat stinks but you love it, let's go.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 No, there is no way he was a velociraptor. No Tony, look at the cranial ridge, OK.If Dino was a velociraptor, he would have eaten the Flintstones. Yeah, yeah.  Oh, were you takin' a nap?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I was.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Oh I-, Oh wait, Tony can you hang on? That's the other line.  Hi.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Did she leave a number?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Did you see me write one down?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I don't have her number, butt-munch.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Well, she'll call back, don't be such a baby.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I'm not a baby, you're the baby.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Look, you wanna get off my back?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 You wanna get out of my face?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Wait hold on Tony, hold on.  Hi Tony, can I call you back? That's uh, that's mysister's boyfriend.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Give me that.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 OK.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Hi sweetie, look before I forget, did I leave my diaphram at your place? Hi mom.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 So uhh, how's the palace?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 You know it's funny you should mention that 'cause I was thinkin'... what's with theboxes?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh, uhh, actually I uh, have some news.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Hey Chan, is that Joey guy gonna come by and pick up his moose hat or should I justtoss it out?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well, uh, why don't you ask him yourself. Joey, this is my new roommate Eddie.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Nice to meet ya.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Likewise. Uh, I'll take that.  It's what I came for. So, this isnew. Where'd you two meet?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 At the uh, supermarket, in the uh, ethnic food section. I helped him pick out achorizo.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Wow.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well you know, we got to talking and uh, he said he needed a place and I had aspare room.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Oh, now it's a spare room?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well yeah, in that it's not being used and I... have it to spare.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Well I uh, got what I came for.  I'll uh, I'll see you guys.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Hey Jo. When'd you start usin' mousse in your hair?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	  Is this guy great or what?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Yeah, yeah he is. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I can't believe he has a new roommate. Who is this guy?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Uh, Eddie something. He just met him.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 It'll never last, he's just a rebound roommate.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh, check it out, oh check it out. It's Smelly Cat the video.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Now OK, I haven't seen it yet so, if you don't like it, well, so what, none of youever made a video.  OK.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh my God.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 I know.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 I sound amazing. I, I, I've never heard myself sing before. I mean, except in myown head. Oh, this is so cool, now I can hear what you hear.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Pretty uhm, different huh?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh, I am sorry but I am incredibly talented.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Hi Joey, what's goin' on man?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Eddie.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Morning.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Morning. I just uh, came by to pick up my mail.  Where's the mail?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh it's uh, over there on the table.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 You don't keep it over here on this table any more?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 No, Eddie likes to keep it over there.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Alright, here you go my friend. Eggs a-la Eddie, huh?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh, ooh.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Huh.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 What?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 No I just uh, thought you liked your eggs with the bread with the hole in themiddle, a-la me.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well I do, but uh, Eddie makes them this way and, well they're pretty darn good.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Well you guys, I'm outta here. See ya pals.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 See ya. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 So how you two gettin' along?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh, I couldn't be happier.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Great, well, I'm happy for ya. Alright that's it. He just comes in here, Mr. Jonny Neweggs, with his, his, his movin' themail and his, his 'see ya pals'. And now there's no juice. There's no juice f or thepeople who need the juice and want the juice. I need the juice.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 There's another carton right over there.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Hey, this isn't about juice anymore, alright man.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Alright, so what's it about?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Eggs. Who's eggs do you like better, his or mine, huh?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well I like both eggs equally.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	 Oh come on. Nobody likes two different kinds of eggs equally. You like one betterthan the other and I wanna know which.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well what's the difference? Your eggs aren't here anymore, are they? You tookyour eggs and you left. You really expect me to never find new eggs?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I wanna watch Entertainment Tonight.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Tough noogies, we're watching Predators of the Serengetti.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Would you guys stop.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 It's my TV.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Wha-, oh, quit it.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Bite me.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Oh my God.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Well, Monica keeps changin' the channel.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Oh that's great, why don't you tell mommy on me.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Now I'm mommy in this little play? Alright look, I refuse to get sucked into thislike, weird little Geller dimension thing OK. So I'm gonna go and take a nice long hotbubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 OK, what're we gonna do about this?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Well, I guess we could tape Entertainment Tonight.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Not that, this, US. Oh my God, Ross, you-re, you're, it's jus-, you-, ever sin-you been here.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Ow, ow, OK. Alright, alright, Mon, Mon, you've gone ultrasonic again, alright.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 I just can't stand you being here all the time.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Why, why, why can't you stand me being here? I don't, I, we're just, ya know, we'rejust havin' fun.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Fun? Fun, you think this is fun?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Yeah, c'mon I mean I though, you know, I thought we're just foolin' around. Likewhen, uh, when we were kids.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Ross, I hated you when we were kids.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 You hated me when we were kids?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Yes. I hated you. I mean I, I, loved you in a 'you're my brother so I have to'kind of way, but basically, yeah, I hated your guts.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Why did you hate me?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Because, you were mean to me and you, you teased me and you always, always gotyour way.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 And that wasn't fun for you?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Duh-huh!
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 I can't believe you hated me.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Now I love you. And not just 'cause I have to.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Really?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Yeah. You're just gonna have to stop pissing me off.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 I can do that.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Then I won't have to kill you.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 So you wanna watch uh, Entertainment Tonight?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Yeah, thanks. You know what?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 What?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 If you really want to watch that Serengetti thing, you can.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 Ohh... OK. 
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 Hey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Listen. You are not going to believe this but, that is not me singing on thevideo.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 No.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Yes.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 Well, how did you find out?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Well, OK, the record company sent over this piece of paper for me to sign, sayingthat it's OK for someone else to sing for me. That was my first clue.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 So what're you gonna do?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Well, I can't work with people who would do this.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Sure.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 I mean this poor woman.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Ross	 What woman?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 The voice woman. Ya know, I mean, she has a great voice but she doesn't have avideo.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	 OK, Phoebs. But what about you?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Well I have a video, you have to pay attention. No this, this voice woman, she'sso talented but, according to the producer people, they said she doesn't have like theright look or something, ya know. I mean, it's like, she's like one of those an imals atthe pound who like nobody wants 'cause they're not pretty enough or you know. Like, likesome old dog who's just kind of like stinky and. Huuuuh, oh my God, she's smelly cat. Oh,oh that song has so many levels.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Hey Eddie, you uh, wanna play some foosball?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 No thanks man, I'm not uh, I'm not really into sports.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	  Doesn'tmatter, time for Baywatch.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Y-, y-, you like that show?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 You don't like that show?
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 Wha-, n-, no. I mean it's just a bunch of pretty people runnin' around on thebeach, ya know.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Well that's the brilliance of it. The pretty people... and the running.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Eddie	 I tell ya, I-, I'm gonna go read in my room for a little while.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	 Oh o-, OK man.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	  Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, what are they feeding you? Everybody.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	All	 Smelly cat, smell-ly cat, it's not your fault.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Monica.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	  They won't take you to the vet.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Chandler.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Chandler	  You're obviously not their favorite pet.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Monica	 Joey.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Joey	  It may not be a bed of roses.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Rachel.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Rachel	  And you're no friend to those with noses.
02	17	0217	The One Where Eddie Moves In	Phoebe	 Uh, Ross, those are the only lines we have, sorry. OK, you guys, once more.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amber	 Oh Drake.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 I'm sorry Amber. It's just like Brad to have to have the last word.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 I'm sorry I'm late, what happened?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 We, we just wanna see the end.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amber	 I want you Drake.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 I know you do but you and I can never be together that way.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amber	 What?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 There's something I never told you Amber. I'm actually your half- brother.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 So what happens next?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Well, I get the medical award for separating the siamesetwins. Then Amber and I go to Venezuela to meet our other half-brother, Ramone. And that'swhere I find the world's biggest emerald. It's really big but it's cursed.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 God that is good TV.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Phoebs, play with meeee.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 No. This game is grotesque. Twenty armless guys joined at the waist by a steelbar, forced to play soccer forever. Ahh, hello, human-rights violation.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Ya know Phoebs, don't feel so bad for 'em. After they'redone playing, I break out the little plastic women and everybody has a pretty good time.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Why don't you play with your roommate?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Ah he's a, he's not a big fan of foosball.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Uh oh, ooh, are we not getting along with the new boy?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 No he's, he's alright, just uh, he spends most of his time in his room.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Maybe that's because you haven't taken the time to get to know him. Let's remedythat, shall we?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 We don't need to remedy that.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, it'll be fun. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 What was that?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Hi, um, I just thought that it would be fun if the three ofus had some beers and got to know each other.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Yeah alright, that sounds alright.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Oh good, ok. Oh nooo, I have to go because I'm late for my um, Green Eggs and Hamdiscussion group. Um tonight it's why he would not eat them on a train. Have fun bye.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 That was so lame.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 I know, yeah. Ok, talk to him. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 So, you uh, you think that Speed Racer guy gets a lot of tickets er?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 That's good, that's good. So, so, so who broke up with who?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 What're you kidding? I broke up with her. She actuallythought that Sean Penn was the capital of Cambodia.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 That's good man, when everybody knows that the uh, the capital of Cambodia is uh...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Well it's not Sean Penn.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Not Sean Penn. Alright, I, I've got a funny one, alright. Mylast girlfriend Tilly. Ok, we're eating breakfast, right, and I made all these pancakes,there was like 50 pancakes right. And all of the sudden she turns to me, alright, and shesays, 'Eddie.' I say, 'yeah,' she says, 'Eddie, I don't want to see you anymore.' And itwas literally like she had reached into my chest, ripped out my heart, and smeared it allover my life, ya know. And now there's like this incredible abyss, ya know, and I'mfalling and I keep falling and I don't think I'm ever gonna stop.  Thatuh, wasn't such a funny story, was it?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 And a crusty old man said I'll do what I can and the restof the rats played moroccas. That's it, thanks, good night.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Phoebe's got another job, right?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Great set tonight Phoebs.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 I know.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Well, we should probably get going.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Um, we should go too, I got patients at 8 in the moring.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Ya know, I was thinking. Ya know how we always stay at yourapartment? Well, I thought maybe tonight we'd stay at my place.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 I don't know, I don't have my jammies.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Well, maybe you don't need them.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 My baby sister, ladies and gentlemen.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Shut up, I'm happy.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Oh, this is so nice. Alright I have to make a speech. I just wanna say that of allthe guys that Monica has been with, and that is a lot, I like you the best.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Oh, thank you Phoebs. That's very sweet.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Ok.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Hear that? She likes me best, and apparently there've beena lot.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Not a lot, Phoebe's kidding, Phoebe's crazy.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Phoebe's dead.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 Hi.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Hi.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 I'm looking for Eddie Minowick.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Oh, uh, he's not here right now, uh, I'm Chandler, can I take a message, or, ora fishtank?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 Thanks.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Oh, oh, c'mon in.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 I'm Tilly.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Oh.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 I gather by that oh that he told you about me.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Oh yeah, your uh, name came up in a uh, conversation that terrified me to myvery soul.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 He's kind of intense huh?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Yes. Hey, can I ask you, is Eddie a little...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	  A little what?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Bit country? C'mon in here you roomie.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Hello Tilly.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 Eddie, I just came by to drop off your tank.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 That's very thoughtful of you. It's very thougtful.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Tilly	 Well, ok then. I'm gonna go. Bye.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Bye-bye.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Bye.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 So, we gettin' a fish?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 You had sex with her didn't you?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Phoebs, check it out, check it out, check it out, check it out.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Oh, ooh, Soap Opera Digest, oh that's one of my favorite digests.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Page 42, page 42, page 42.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, ok, ok. Ooh, hey 'new doc on the block, Days of Our Lives' Joey Tribbiani.'Ooh, cool picture.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Ooh, I look good.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Hey is this true, that you write a lot of your own lines?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Uh, well, kinda yeah. Like, remember last week when Alex was in the accident? Wellthe line in the script was, 'If we don't get this woman to a hospital, she's going todie.' But I made it, ' If this woman doesn't get to a hospital, she's not gonna live.'
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Ohh, ok, I see what you did there. Aren't you afraid though, that the writers aregonna be kinda mad when they read this?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Huh? Never really thought about the writers. The scripts just kinda come to myhouse. But you know what? This makes me look good, which makes the show look good, whichmakes the writers look good so how could they be mad about that?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Writer	 Makes up most of his lines. Son-of-a-. Yeah, well, write this jerkweed.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 I fall down an elevator shaft? What the hell does this mean, I fall down an elevatorshaft?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Delivery Guy	 Uhh, I don't know, I just bring the scripts.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 They can't kill me, I'm Francesca's long lost son.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Delivery Guy	 Right. Could you sign this?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 No. No way, I'm not signing that.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Delivery Guy	 I don't think that's gonna affect the plot of the show.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 How can they do this to me?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Delivery Guy	 Er, uh, I'm just gonna go. Sorry.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Well it wasn't that many guys. I mean, if you consider howmany guys there actually are, it's a very small percentage.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Hey, it's not that big a deal, I was just curious.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 G'night.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Night Richard. Good luck Mon.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Alright, before I tell you, uh, why don't you tell me howmany women you've been with.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Two.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Two? TWO? How is that possible? I mean, have you seen you?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Well, I mean what can I say? I, I was married to Barbara for 30 years. She was myhigh school sweetheart, now you, that's two.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Two it is. Ok, time for bed, I'm gonna go brush my teeth. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Woah, woah, no wait a minute now. C'mon it's your turn. Ohc'mon. Ya know, I don't need the actual number, just a ballpark.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Ok, it is definitely less than a ballpark.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Tell me about it. So what, what's your magic number?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Uhhhooo.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 C'mon, you know everyone I've been with. All, both of them.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Well, there's you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Better not be doin' these in order.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ok, uh, Billy Dreskin, Pete Carney, Barry, and uh, oh, Paolo.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Oh yes, the weenie from Torrini.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than Iever was with him.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Really?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh please. That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. Allit really was was just, ya know, meaningless animal sex. Ok, ya know, that sounded soooomuch better in my head.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 That's very interesting, ya know, 'cause that's exactly what someone who slept withher would say.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 This is nuts. This is crazy. She came over for like two minutes, dropped off afish tank, and left, end of story.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Where's Buddy?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Buddy?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 My fish, Buddy.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 There was no fish when she dropped it off.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Oh, this is, this is unbelievable. I mean, first you sleep with my ex-girlfriendthen you insult my inteligenct by lying about it and then you kill my fish, my Buddy?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Hey I didn't kill your fish. Look Eddie...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 That's it? That's the giant number you were afraid to tell me?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Well yeah.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Well, that's not bad at all. I mean, you had me thinkin it was like a fleet.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 You really ok with it?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Oh honey, I'm fine.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Oh, yay. Ok about that two.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 What? Alright, what about my two?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Well, it just seems like a really small number.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Right, and...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 And, well, don't you have a lot of wild oats to sew? Or is that what you're doingwith me? Oh my God, am I an oat?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Honey, you are not an oat. I, I mean I don't know, I, I guess I'm just not an oatguy. I've only slept with women I've been in love with.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 But you've only slept with two people.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Right.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Wow. Oh wow. You know I love you too, right.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Now I do. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ross, Ross, please listen to me. Ross, you are so muchbetter for me than Paolo ever was. I mean you care about me, you're loving, you make melaugh.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over andhave a little romp in the sack and I'll just stand in the corner and tell knock-knockjokes.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Animal sex, animal sex? So what're you saying, I mean, you'resaying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all. I mean there's not even like,uhm, a little animal, not even, not even like, like chipmunk sex?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ok, Ross, try to hear me. Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. Ok, it was goodwith Paolo.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Knock-knock.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 But, what you and I have is so much better. Ok, we have tenderness, we haveintimacy, we connect. Ya know, I swear, this is the best I have ever had.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Until now. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh, hi.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Hi. Richard just told me he loves me.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh my God, honey that's great.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 I know. I just can't find...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh they're in the top drawer. Hurry.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 You need one too?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ooooh yeah.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 There's only one.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Monica.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Hi. Uh, we'll be right there, we're just trying to decide something. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	  Hey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Hey. They're just trying to decide somehting.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Good, good, good. So, is uh, was your moustache, did, used to be different?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 No.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Oh. How do you uh, ya know, keep it so neat?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 I have a little comb.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Oh. And what do you call that?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 A moustache comb.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 No.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where wekeep the dustpan.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Agghhh.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 So were you in Nam?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Rock-paper-scissors?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Yeah.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel, Monica	 One two three. 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Yeesss.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Fine, go have sex.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 No. You have got it completely wrong. John Savage was deerhunter, no legs, JohnVoit was coming home, couldn't feel his legs.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 No, no way. You've got it totally the other way around my friend. John Voit was...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Honey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 What, what oh....
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Shall we?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 It's not gonna happen. They're doing it tonight, we can doit tomorrow.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Uh, in the future, if I could see the schedule beforehand...
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 So, when I woke up this morning, he'd stolen all the insoles out of my shoes.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Why?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Because he thinks I slept with his ex-girlfriend and killed his fish.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Why would you kill his fish?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Because sometimes, Phoebe after you sleep with someone, you have to kill thefish.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Chandler honey, I'm sorry. Ok, can we watch Joey's show now please? 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Wait, he's not here yet.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 So, he's on the show, he knows what happens.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Alright.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Oh, I'm fine about my problem now, by the way.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh good.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Amber, I want you to know that I'll always be there for you, as a friendand as your brother.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amber	 Oh Drake.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Horton	 Hard day huh? First the medical award, this.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Some guys are just lucky I guess.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Intercom	 Dr. Remore, report to first floor emergency, stat.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Well then, uh, I uhh, guess that's me. Anyone else need to go on the elevator?Dr. Horton, Dr. Wong?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Horton	 No, no, they only said you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Oh, ok. Alright.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amger	 I love you Drake.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Yeah, whatever. Oh no.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Amber	 Drake, look out.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Dr. Remore	 Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Did they just kill off Joey?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 No.  Now maybe.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 C'mon.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Joey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Open up. We want to talk to you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 I don't feel like talkin.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Oh c'mon Joey, we care about you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 We're worried about you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 And some of us really have to pee.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Sorry Joey 
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Hey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Listen, sorry about your death, that really sucks.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 We came over as soon as we saw.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 How could you not tell us?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 I don't know, I was kinda hopin' no one would ever find out.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Well, maybe they can find a way to bring you back.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Naa, they said that when they found my body, my brain was sosmashed in that the only doctor that could have saved me was me. Supposed to be some kindof irony or somethin.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 But Joey, you're gonna be fine. You don't need that show, itwas just a dumb soap opera.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 Phoebe, this was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Phoebe	 Yes, I was going to incorporate that. Oh good, here's Monica, she'll havesomething nice to say.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Monica	 Um, I straightened out your shower curtain so you won't get mildew. What? To methat's nice.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 It's gonna be ok. You know that?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 No, I don't. It's like, ya know, you work your whole life for somethin' and youthink that when you get it it's never gonna be as good as you thought it would be. Butthis so was. Ya know, it changed everything. Like the other day, I got this credit cardapplication, and I was pre- approved. Huh? I've never been pre-approved for anything in mylife.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 I'm sorry man.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Rachel	 Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything toyou but you'll always be pre-approved with us.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Joey	 No, that means nothin to me.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Uhhhaahh.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Pecan sandy, just made em.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Yeah alright. What're these, raisins?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 Uh, sure, why not.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	  Listen Eddie, um, I'vebeen thinking about our current living situation and uh, why are you smiling?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 I got a little surprise, look. There's a new fishie. I namedhim uh, Chandler, you know, after, after you.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	  Well that's not an, even a realfish. No, that's a goldfish cracker.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Eddie	 What's you point man?
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Chandler	 Ok, good night.  You big freak of nature.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Hey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Hey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Hey.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Ohh, brisk tonight.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 Oh man.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Richard	 Let's never speak of this.
02	18	0218	The One Where Dr. Ramoray Dies	Ross	 You got it. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Hey Eddie. Daahh!! What're you doin' here?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Nothin' roomie, just watchin' you sleep.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Why?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Makes me feel um, peaceful, heh-heh, please.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 I can't sleep now.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 You want me to sing?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 No, look, that's it, it's over, I want you out, I want you out of the apartmentnow.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Woah, woah, woah, what're, what're you talkin' about man.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Hannibal Lecter...better roommate than you.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 No. See now I don't think you're being fair. I mean one nightyou see me and you get scared, I mean, what about all the other nights when you don't seeme, huh? What about last night when you went and got a drink of water and I was niceenough to hide behind the door, what's that about, huh?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 I didn't realize that.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Yeah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 GET OUT NOW!!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Ok, you really want me out?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Yes please.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Ok, then I want to hear you say it, I, I want to hear you sayyou want me out.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 I want you out.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 No no no, I wanna hear it from your lips.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Where did you hear it from before?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Oh, right, all right, you know what pallie I understand, consider me gone, you knowwhat, I'll be out by the time you get home from work tomorrow.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 I heard that.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Hey. Whe-ell, look at you, finally got that time machineworkin' huh?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Seriously, you like it? This guy was sellin' them on 8thavenue and I looked at 'em and I though, you know what I don't have?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 A mirror?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Fine, make fun. I think it's jaunty.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Wow, for a guy who's recently lost his job, you're in an awfully good mood.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey, I'll be alright. I mean it's not like I'm starting from sqare one. I was Dr.Drake Remoray on Days of Our Lives. Heh? I mean that's gotta have some kind ofcache.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Cache? Jaunty?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Chandler gave me word of the day toilet paper. I'm gonna get some coffee.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Oooh, so so so, did you read the book?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Oh my God, it was incredible.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Didn't it like totally speak to you?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Woah, woah, woah, what book is this?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Rachel you have to read this book. It's called Be Your Own Windkeeper. It'sabout how women need to become more empowered.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Yeah and oh, and but there's, there's wind and the wind can make us Goddesses. Butyou know who takes out wind? Men, they just take it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Men just take out wind?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Ya-huh, all the time, cause they are the lightning bearers.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Wow.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Well that sounds kinda cool, kinda like The Hobbit.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 It is nothing like the Hobbit. It's like reading about every relationship I'veever had, except for Richard.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Oh yes, no, Richard would never steal your wind.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 No.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 No, 'cause he's yummy.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Yes. But all the other ones.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Oh yes. Oh and, the part about how they're always like drinking from out pool ofinner power, but God forbid we should take a sip.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Anybody want a croan.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Ok, this is a typical lightning-bearer thing. Right there,it's like, um, 'Hello, who wants one of my fallic shaped man cakes?'
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 Don't worry about it already. Things happen.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 So, you're not mad at me for getting fired and everything?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 Joey, look at me, look at me. Do I have lipstick on my teeth?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 No, can we get back to me?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 Look honey, people get fired left and right in this business. I already got youan audition for Another World.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Alright. Cab driver number two?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 You're welcome.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 But I was Dr. Drake Remoray. How can I go from bein' a neurosurgeon to drivin' acab?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 Things change, roll with em.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 But this is a two line part, it's like takin' a step backwards. I'm not gonna dothis.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Estelle	 Joey, I'm gonna tell you the same thing I told Al Minser and his pyramid of dogs.Take any job you can get and don't make on the floor.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I'm sorry. See ya.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Oh, God, oh, God, I mean it's just so.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Isn't it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Uhh, I mean this is like reading about my own life. I meanthis book could have been called 'Be Your Own Windkeeper Rachel'.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 I don't think it would have sold a million copies but it would have made a nicegift for you.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Hey you guys.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Hey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Uh, sweetie we've gotta go.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 NO!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 No?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 No, why do we always have to do everything according to yourtime table?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Actually it's the movie theatre that has the time schedule. So you don't miss thebeginning.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 No, see this isn't about the movie theatre, this is about you stealing my wind.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 You go girl. I can't pull that off can I?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Excuse me, your, your, your wind?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Yes, my wind. How do you expect me to grow if you won't letme blow?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 You, you know I, I don't, have a- have a problem with that.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Ok, I just, I just really need to be with myself right now. I'm sorry.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Um-um, um-um.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 You're right, I don't have to apologize. Sorry. Damnit!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What is it?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 I, I don't know, it's got all this stuff about wind and treesand there's some kind of sacred pool in it. I mean, I don't really get it but she's, she'spretty upset about it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 See, this is why I don't date women who read. Uh-oh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 What, what's that?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 It's my VISA bill. Envelope one of two. That can't be good.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Open it, open in.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Oh my God.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Woah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Look at this, how did I spend so much money?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Uh Joey, that's just the minumum amount due, that's your total due.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Ahh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 What, woah, woah, $3500 at porcelain safari?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 My animals. Hey the guy said they suited me, he spoke with an accent, I was allconfused. I don't know what I'm gonna do.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Well I guess you can start by drivin a cab on Another World.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 That audition.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 That's a two line part.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Joey, you owe $1100 at I Love Lucite.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 So what.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 So suck it up man, it's a job, it's money.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey, look, I don't need you getting all judgemental and condescending and pedantic.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Toilet paper?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Yeah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Look, I'm not being any of those things, ok, I'm just being realistic.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Well knock it off, you're supposed to be my friend.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 I am your friend.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Well then tell me things like, 'Joey you'll be fine,' and,'Hang in there,' and, and, 'Somethin' big's fonna come along, I know it.'
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 But I don't know it. What I do know is that you owe $2300 at Isn't it Chromantic.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey Ross, I'm aware of what I owe.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Ok, well then get some sense. I mean it took you what, 10 years to get that job, whoknows how long it's gonna be till you get another.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Look, I don't wanna hear this right now.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Huh, I'm just saying...
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Well don't just say.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Ya know, maybe, maybe I should just go.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Ok.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Ok. I'll see ya later. Just think about it, ok.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I don't need to think about it. I was Dr. Drake Remoray. That was huge. Big thingsare gonna happen, you'll see. Ross, you still there?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Hey pal.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Ahhhh-gaaaahhh. Eddie what're you still doin' here?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Ah, just some basic dehydrating of a few fruits and vegetables. MAN ALIVE thisthing's fantastic!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Look Eddie, aren't you forgetting anything?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Oh yeah, that's right, look I got us a new goldfish. He's alot fiestier that the last one.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Maybe 'cause the last one was made by Pepperidge Farm. Look Eddie, isn't theresomething else you're supposed to be doing right now?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Well, not unless it's got something to do with dehydrating my man because right nowI'm a dehydrating maniac!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Look you have to help me out here. I thought we had a deal. I thought by thetime...
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Ah-ah-ah, you know what that is?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Your last roommate's kidney?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 That's a tomato. This one definitely goes in the display.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey Gunther, let me get a lemonade to go.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Gunther	 Lemonade? You ok man?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Ah, it's career stuff. I don't know if you heard but they killed off my character onthe show.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Gunther	 Oh, that's too bad. How'd they do it?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I fell down an elevator shaft.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Gunther	 That sucks. I was buried in an avalanche.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Gunther	 I used to be Bryce on All My Children.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Daaahhhh!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Aaahhhhhhh! Aaahhhh!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Why must everybody watch me sleep? There'll be no more watching me sleep, nomore watching.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 I wa-
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Uuuh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Hey man, check it out, I got some great stuff to dehydratehere. I got some grapes, got some apricots, I thought it would be really cool to see whathappens with these water balloons.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Get out. Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out, get out.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 You, move out. Take your fruit, your stupid small fruitand GET OUT!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 You, you want, you want me to move out?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Uh-huh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 I uh, I gotta tell you man, I mean, that's uh, it's kinda out of the blue, I meandon't you think?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 This is not out of the blue, this is smack dab in the middle of the blue.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Ohhhh. Relax, take it easy buddy. Tell me twice, you want me to go? Alright,alright, guess I'll be back for my stuff.  But if you think for one second I'm leaving you alone with my fish, you're insaneJack!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 You want some help.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 No help required Chico. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 All the way to the airport huh? You know that's over 30 miles, that's gonna costyou about so bucks.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Casting Guy	 Excuse me, that's 50 bucks.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Casting Guy	 Five oh dollars.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Ohh, you know what it is? It's smudgy 'cause they're fax pages. Now when I was on Daysof Our Lives as Dr. Drake Remoray, they'd send over the whole script on real paper andeverything. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Casting Guy	 That's great.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 And, and just so you know, if you wanted to expand this scenelike, like have the cab crash or somethin', I could attend to the victims 'cause I have abackground in medical acting.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Casting Guy	 Ok, listen, thanks for coming in.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 No no, uh, don't thank me for comin' in. Uh, at least let me finish. Uh, we couldtake the expressway but uh, this time of day you're better off taking the budge. Youwere goin' for the word bridge there weren't ya. I'll have a good day. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Ok, question number 28, have you ever allowed a lighningbearer to take your wind? I would have to say no.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 And I would have to say pah-huh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Do you not remember the puppet guy?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Yeah you like totally let him wash his feet in the pool of your inner power.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 And his puppet too.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Yeah ok, well at least I didn't let some guy into the forestof my righteous truth on the first date.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Who?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Paul.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Oh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. Ok number29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? Ok, number 30.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Woah, woah, woah, let's go back to 29.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Not uh, not to my recollection.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Huuh, alright, Danny Arshak, ninth grade. Oh, c'mon Rach, you know the bottle wastotally pointing at me.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Only 'cause you took up half the circle.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Listen to you two. It's so sad. Looks like I'm gonna begoing to the goddess meetings alone.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Well not when they find out you slept with Jason Hurley an hour after he broke upwith Monica.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 One hour? You are such a leaf blower.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Oh hey uh, be careful with that 3-D last supper, Judas is a little loose.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	  Oh my God, what's goin' on?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 They're takin all my stuff back. I guess you were right.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 No look I wasn''t right, that's what I came here to tell you.I was totally hung up on, on my own stuff. Listen, I'm someone who needs the wholesecurity thing, ya know. To know exactly where my next paycheck is coming from buy you,you don't need that and that's amazing to me. I could never do what you do Joey.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Thanks Ross.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Yeah. And you should hold out for something bigger. I can't tell you how muchrespect I have for you not going to that stupid cab driver audition.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I went.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Great, how did it go?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I didn't get it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Good for you.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 You're livin' the dream.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Huh?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 All right then.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	  Oh, not my parrot.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 What?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I can't watch this.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	  Hey hold on, hold on. How much for theuh, how much to save the bird?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Mover	 1200.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Dollars? You spent $1200 dollars on a plastic bird?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Uhhh, I was an impulse buyer, near the register.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Go ahead, go ahead with the bird. Ok, do you have anything for around 200?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Mover	 Uh, the dog. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 Huh.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Mover	 Yeah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Ross	 I'll take it. My gift to you man.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Thanks Ross. I really like that bird though...I'll take the dog though.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Here are your cakes.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 We didn't order cake.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 No, I know, they're from me. Look you guys this is not good. I mean we have enoughtrouble with guys stealing our wind without taking it from each other.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 You're right.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 You know.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 I love you goddesses. I don't ever want to suck your wind again.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Thank you. So are we good?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 We're good.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 We're good?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Rachel	 Ok, let me take these cakes back 'cause they're gonna takethat out of my paycheck.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	  Ding dong, the psycho's gone.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Are you sure this time?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Yes, yes I actually saw him leave. I mean that guy isstanding in the window holding a human head. He is STANDING IN THE WINDOW HOLDING A HUMANHEAD!
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	  Check it out man, I tore it off some mannaquin inthe alley behind Macy's.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 There is no alley behind Macy's.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 So I got it in the junior miss department, big diff. Anyway check it out man, it'sgonna make a hell of a conversation piece at out next cocktail party, huh pal?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Our next cocktail party?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Yeah, you know, put chips in it, we'll make like a chip chick.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Eddie, do you remember yesterday?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Uh yes, I think I vaguely recall it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Do you remember talking to me yesterday?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Uh, yes.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 So what happened?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 We took a road trip to Las Vegas man.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Oh sweet Moses.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 So on this road trip, did you guys win any money?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Naah, I crapped out, but Mr. 21 over here he cleans up, 300 bucks, check it out hebuys me these new shoes, sweet huh?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Monica	 Nice.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Yeah. Well see ya upstairs. See ya pals.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Phoebe	 Is anyone else starting to really like him?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 May I help you?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Why doesn't my key work and what's all my stuff doin' downstairs?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Well, I'm, I'm sorry... Ahhh. Have we met?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 It's Eddie you freak, your roommate.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 I, I'm sorry, I uh 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hello.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Yeah, he's lived here for years, I don't, I don't know what you're talking aboutman.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 No he, he moved out and I moved in.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Well I, I think we'd remember something like that.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 I know I would.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Eddie	 Well that's uh, that's a good point. Um ok, well, uh, I guess I got the wrongapartment then. I, I'm, look, I'm, ya know, I'm sorry, I'm terriably sorry.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Hey no problem.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 See ya.  Goodbuy you fruit dryingpsychopath. So you want me to help you unpack your stuff?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Na, na I'm ok. Oh and uh, just so you know, I'm not movin' back in 'cause I have to.Well, I mean, I do have to. It's just that that place wasn't really, I mean, this is...
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Welcome home man. 
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 A little foos?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Absolutely.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 What happened to the foosball?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Ah that's a cantelope.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 Hey look, are we gonna have to bring this out every time Ross comes over?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 He paid a lot of money for it.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 I'm gonna hold him a different way. Look I don'tunderstand, if you hated it so much, why did you buy it in the first place?
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Joey	 Well, I had a whole ceramic zoo thing goin' over there but now, without the otherones, it just looks tacky.
02	19	0219	The One Where Eddie Won't Go	Chandler	 So is he housetrained or is he gonna leave little bathroomtiles all over the place? Stay. Good, STAY! Good fake dog.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Hey. Watcha guys doin?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Monica's making us watch Old Yeller.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Why are you guys so upset? It's Old Yeller, it's a happy movie.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 What're you talkin' about?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 C'mon, happy family gets a dog, frontier fun.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah but Phoebs, what about the end?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 What when Yeller saves saves the family from the wolf and everyone's happy?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 That's not the end.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Yu-huh. That's when my mother would shut off the TV and say 'The end'.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 What about the part where he has rabies?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 He doesn't have rabies, he has babies. That's what my mom said.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh, Phoebe, I don't think your mom would want you to see what's about to happen.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 What, what's about to happen?  
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Hey, have you guys eaten, because uh, Richard and I justfinished and we've got leftovers... Chicken and potatoes... What am I wearing?...Actually,nothing but rubber gloves.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Ya know, one of these times you're gonna really be naked and we're not gonna comeover.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Alright, I've got a leg, three breasts and a wing.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Well, how do you find clothes that fit?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Oh, hey, Monica, we've got a question.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Alright, for the bizillionth time, yes I see other women in shower at the gym, andno I don't look.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 No, not that one. We're trying to figure out who to bring to the Knicks gametonight, we have an extra ticket.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, Ross can't go so it's between my friend Eric Prower who has breath issuesand Dan with the poking.  'Did you see that play? Doyou want some more beer? Is that Spike Lee?'
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Ok.  Hey, why don't you ask Richard?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Ok, uh, hey Richard, if you had an extra ticket to the Knicks game and you had tochoose between a friend who smells and one who bruises you who would you pick?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Wow. Well being a huge Knicks fan myself, I think youshould take someone who's a huge Knicks fan.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Ok, that's Eric.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Glad to be of help. Matches. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 I meant, why don't you take Richard to the game? What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 I don't know.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 C'mon. Keeps his fingers to himself and he's always minty fresh.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 I don't know, Richard's really nice and everything, uh,it's just that we don't know him really well, ya know, and plus he's, ya know, old  -er than some people, but, uh, younger than some buildings.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So what, he's a little older, big deal, I mean he's important to me. Ya know ifyou ask him, he might take you on his Jag. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 How do we say yes now and make it seem like we're not doin' itjust to ride in the cool car?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Ok, this could be tough.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	  Ok ok ok ok. Monica, we'll bring him, but only ifhe takes the Jaguar.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Ooh, you almost had it.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	  No no, you're fine, you're fine.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	  Hello
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Hi honey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Oh you guys are not gonna believe what happened.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ok, we were sitting over there playing on the floor and hegrabs the table and he pulls himself up. He pulled himself up. Standing man. I'm sorry youguys missed it but I did tape it so it you guys want to see it.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Uhh, we know, he already did it last week.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 You can watch our tape if you want. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 I don't believe this. I miss, I miss the first time of everything. I missed, what,the first time he rolled over, the first time he crawled. What else did I miss? Has hespoken yet, is he driving, does he have a favorite liquour?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Actually, he is getting closer on the talking thing. He can't quite say mama yet,but once he said yumen.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ooh, I, I'm so sick of missing stuff. Ya know, I want him formore than, than a day, I want him for a whole weekend. No listen , I mean, I feel like-
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol, Susan	 Great. That would be fine.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Really? I mean, I, I had a whole speach prepared.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 Oh shout, that would have been fun.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Oh look, did, did you just see that? Did you see? He just waved, he just waved, he'snever waved before, you've never waved before. Yes he has. Very good.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Hey Phoebs, whatcha got there?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Ok, Love Story, Brian's Song, and Terms of Endearment.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Wow, all you need now is The Killing Fields and some guacamole and you'vegot yourself a part-ay.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, I talked to my grandma about the Old Yellerincident, and she told me that my mom used to not show us the ends of sad movies to shieldus from the pain and sadness. You know, before she killed herself.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Hey. Where is he, where's Richard? Did you ditch him?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Yeah right after we stole his lunch money and gave him a wedgie. What's the matterwith you, he's parking the car.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So'd you guys have fun?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Your boyfriend is so cool.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Really?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, he let us drive his Jaguar. Joey for 12 blocks, mefor 15.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Wow, he must like you the best.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Oh, what about that thing he did when he tipped the guy whoshowed us to our seats. You never even saw the money, it was like this. .
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 You're welcome. Hey Joey, thanks for parking the car .
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 No problem. Hey Chandler
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 I think they get it.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Ok.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 There's the man.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 He-he-eyy. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Hey, you're gettin' better. I'm gonna keep this by the way.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Ok. He kept my dollar.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So your first whole weekend without Ben, what're you guys gonna do?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Uh, we're going down to Colonial Williamsburg.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 Yeah, a woman I went to college with just became the first female blacksmith downthere.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well, ya know, they're a little behind the times in Colonial Williamsburg.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Think I better go before mommy starts weeping.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Buy mommy.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol, Susan	 We love you. Buy.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Have a good time. Ok, Ben.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Ross.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Look.  Joey, do you know we can see you from here?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 How come Richard looks so much cooler with one of these thanme?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well for starters, you may want to light it and lose the spatula.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 You know what, I think it's cute, you trying to be more like Richard.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Not like him, per-se, just not un-like him.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Look it's the artist formerly known as Chandler.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Just tryin' somethin' here, ya know.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So Joey, why didn't you grow a moustache?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Oh we flipped for it. I got the cigar, he got the moustache. Figured if we both grewit, we'd look like dorks.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah, you really sidestepped that land mine.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Hey listen, we've gotta go, I promised Richard we'd meet him downstairs.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 You're meeting Richard?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Yeah, we're goin' to a Ranger game.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, didn't he tell ya?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Well, he told me he was going out with the guys, I just didn't know that you werethe guys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 You hear that? We're the guys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 We're the guys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 With that moustache doesn't Chandler remind you of Aunt Sylvia?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Thank you.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Hi, we're visitiing. It's Ben and his da-da. Da-da. Can yousay da-da? Look, I'm gonna tell your momies you said it anyway so you might as well try.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 No luck huh?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Naa. A while ago I got a sah out of him, which I thought, ya know, might turn intosah-condary caregiver but... Hey, would you uh, would you hold him for a sec, 'cause I, Igotta take this off.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Oh, yeah sure, Ok. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 What're you doing?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Uh, I'm holding Ben.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah, well, he's a baby not a bomb.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ok.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well just hold him like you'd hold a football.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 This is how I would hold a football.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ok, here, here. There we go.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ok, I'm sorry, I'm just not very good with babies. I mean I haven't been aroundthem, I mean, you know, since I was one.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 It's alright, it's no big deal.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Really?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah, definitely, I'm sure you'll feel totally different when it's our baby.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 What?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 You think about stuff like that?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Uhh, yeah. I mean, actually I kinda think that we'll have, we'll have two babies.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Two, two babies?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah. Ya know, a boy and a girl. Hopefully the girl will come first so Ben herewon't feel too competitive.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Then what's gonna happen?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well, we won't wanna raise kids in the city so we'll probably move to uh, Scarsdale.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah, that way I figure, ya know, we'll be far enough away from our parents that wedon't have to see them all the time but close enough that they can come over and babysitwhenever we want. And yes, I know, the taxes are a little higher than, let's say, Nassaucounty but the school system's supposedly great.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Wow. Wow, that's great. Great. Ok, wow, you know what.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Huh?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 I'm off my break now so uh, um here you take this 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Hey Phoebs, what's happening?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Oh, ok, murder, cancer, soccer teams eating each other in the Andes.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So you watched the movies huh?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Uh huh, what is happening to the world? I mean, no no no, 'cause ET leaves, andand Rocky loses, Charlotte dies.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Charlotte who?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 With the web, the spider she dies, she does. She has babies and dies. It's like yaknow, hey welcome home from the hospital, thud.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Alright, you wanna feel better?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Ok, here, watch this.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 It's a Wonderful Life. Yes I've heard of this.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 So you can't lose, it's there in the title. Wonderfullness is baked right in.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Please, I almost fell for that with, uh, Pride of the Yankees, I thought Iwas gonna see a film about Yankee pride and then, boom, the guy gets Lou Gehrig's disease.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh, the guy was Lou Gehrig. Didn't you kinda see it coming?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Phoebe, just watch that, I promise it will resotre all your faith in humanity.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	  Hey, big guy, game time.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Hey, be right there.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 There's a game?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Uh, yeah, I just got my pick-up sticks back from the shop. Bring your nerves ofsteel.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 It's the basketball playoffs.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Listen, um honey, I appreciate this but you don't have to keep hanging out withthem for me, I mean, they have each other.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Oh, no, honey, I mean, don't worry, I like hanging out withthose guys. It's fun for me. They're different than my other friends, they don't startsentences with, 'You know who just died shoveling snow?'
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Alright that's great, then just go. Go Knicks.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh, it's the college playoffs.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Oh, then go Vassar.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh, they're not in it.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Ok, then just go.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Ok. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Oh, why does this bother me so much? I mean I don't wanna be one of those peoplewho tells their boyfriend they wanna spend 24 hours a day with them.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Sure.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 It's just that he doesn't have that much free time, ya know,and I don't know, what do I do?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Does it matter? You're ultimately just gonna die or get divorced or have to blowyour pets head off.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	  Aghh.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Me too. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 I've got a question. Richard made plans again with the guys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Ya know what, I think I'm gonna go to my room and readCosmo, maybe there's something helpful in there. Know what, at least maybe I can learn howto do an at home bikini wax with leftover Cristmas candles.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	  Ok, what the hell happened back there?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 I don't know, you tell me. One minute I'm holding Ben like a football, the nextthing I know, I've got two kids, I'm living in Scarsdale complaining about the taxes.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well I'm sorry, I think about stuff. Ya know, I mean, you'reat work, you're assembling bones, your mind wanders.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating forsix weeks.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 C'mon, what, you never think about our future?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Yes, but I, I think about who's apartment we're gonna sleepat tomorrow night and, and where we're gonna have dinner next Saturday night. I do notthink about what our childrens' names are gonna be. You know what our childrens names aregonna be.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 No, no, I mean, ya know, I, I read a book and there was a girl named Emily and Ithought, I thought that might be good.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 What was the book?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 The big book of childrens' names.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 But I do not want to have everything decided for me. I spent my whole life likethat. It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. I, I like notknowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you aregonna have to deal with that.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ok fine.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Thank you.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 We're not done.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 I didn't know that.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ok, then you're gonna have to understand that you're with aguy who's not gonna stop planning his future with you because he knows that we're gonnaend up together and if that scares you, tough, 'cause you're gonna have to deal with that.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Fine, I will.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Good, 'cause I love you.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Well I love you too.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well that's the first time we've said that.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Yes it is.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well, I'm gonna kiss you.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Well you better.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Hey. Oh thanks for the great movie tip.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Did you like it?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Oh yeah. You know, I don't know if I was happier when um George Bailey destroyedthe family business or um, Donna Reid cried, or when the mean pharmacist made his earbleed.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Alright, I'll give you the ear thing but don't you think the ending was prettywonderful?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 I didn't watch the ending, I was too depressed. It just keptgetting worse and worse, it should have been called, "It's a sucky life and just whenyou think it can't suck any more it does."
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Kick save and... denied.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 But... he gets it back, pass to the middle, lines it upand... BAM! Yes! Could that shot BE any prettier?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Man you are incredible.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Well, we had a table in college.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Oh really, I didn't know they had foosball in the 1800's.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Nice moustache by the way. When puberty hits that thing'sreally gonna kick in.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	  Honey. Uh, not to sound too Florence Henderson but, dinner's on thetable.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Ok, just one more point.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	  Score! Now can we go?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 See, that's why we don't let her play.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Is everything all right?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Um-hmm.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh-oh.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Oh hey listen, don't be mad at him, it's our fault. I'm sorry we've been hogginso much of his time.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Yeah, he's just really great to hang around with.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Well.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 No no, seriously, Chandler and I were just talkin about this.He is so much cooler than our dads.  I mean,you know, our dad's are ok, ya know, but Richard is just- ow, ow. What are you kickin mefor? Huh? I'm tryin to talk here.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh, you guys see me as a dad?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Oh yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 No.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Nooooo.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 Your just, your just clearly not familiar with our youngpersons vernacular. See, when we say dad, we mean buddy. We mean pal.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Uh-huh, yeah.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 No no, seriously, Joey's my dad, Monica's my dad. I've even got some dads downat work.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 That's fine. Well, your other dad and I are gonna go have a romantic evening andI guess I'll just see you kids around.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Nighty-nite.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 You're not a dad. You're not a dad.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Joey	 Not a dad.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Chandler	 I can't believe you got us into trouble. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	  So are you ok?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 Yeah, just, I feel like I'm about a hundred. I thought I was just one of theguys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Come here. I'll make you feel like one of the guys. You know for a really coolguy, you suck at foosball.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Richard	 What're you talkin' about, I was killin' 'em.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Monica	 Yeah, well they suck too.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Ok, and then you take the poopie diaper and you put it in thepoopie diaper pail.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this processany cuter.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	  Hello.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 It's us.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Come on up. I'm gonna get the rest of his stuff together. 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? Yes we can, yes we can.  There. I did it. I did it. Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ben	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 I'm sorry, what did you just say? Did you just say hi? Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Benjust said 'Hi'.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Wha, what?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ben just said hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 What, the word hi?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Ye-, no, my Uncle Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Great, great, and I miss that too, I miss everything.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry, I guess I just bring it out in him.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol, Susan	 Hello.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Guess what. Ben just said his first word.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 What did he say?
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Something about hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 That's so exciting.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Mommy is so proud of you. Hi. Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 You know, actually it's more like, hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Hi.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 Ok, this could go on for a while.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 We've got a cab waiting downstairs.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Well, this was fun. Uh, we should really do it again sometime, wha'dya say? Ok.Alright so I've got him.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 Tuesday.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Tuesday right. Ok, bye you guys.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Take care.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Bye Ben.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ben	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Rachel	 Did, did he just, did he, did he just say, he said bye. He said bye. You said, yousaid bye to me. You said bye to me.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Susan	 Suddenly I'm seeing him go off to college.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Carol	 We've gotta go, we've got that cab waiting.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Alright, alright, ok. Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ben	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ben	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ben	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ross	 Bye.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ernie	 Oh wow, look at this nice deep hole I've been digging. Hey Bert, isn't this anice hole here. Hey.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Ernie	 Bert, Bert. Bert. Hey, what happened to my friend Bert? He was here just amoment ago. Oh no, my old friend Bert is lost.
02	20	0220	The One Where Old Yeller Dies	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm so glad you're here.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey Monica, why are we watchin' the business channel?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 'Cause I was going by it the other day and I saw that there was a stock with myinitials, MEG, on it and, well, sometimes I have to watch for two or three hours before itcomes up again but when it does, it's pretty exciting.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok honey, you really need a job.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Mon, speaking of which, dad says he knows someone you can call for an interview.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Really.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok, right there. That, that's the third sign today. Rightthere.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 On behalf of everyone, I'd just like to say behuh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 No, 'cause you just said dad and everywhere I go today Ikeep getting signs telling me to go see my father. Like when I was walking over here and Ipassed a buffet...which is my father's last name.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Everyone	 Ahh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 And they were serving franks which is his first name minus the s at the end. Andthere was a rotisserie with spinning chicken.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 His indian name?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 No because I chickened out the last time when I tried to meet him. So I meancoincidences? I don't think so.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Freakish.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Wow.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Freaky.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Weird, weird.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok, so uh, who wants the last hamburger?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Oh, alright, that's it, now I have to go see him.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Why?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Hamburger. McDonald's. Old MacDonald had a farm, my dad is a pharmacist.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Man, I am so beat.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Oh yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Hey, you just wanna forget about raquetball and hang out here?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Yeah alright.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	  Hey you're in our seats.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Oh, sorry we didn't know.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	  Hey, we were sitting there.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok, there is one more way to say it, who knows it?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Is that supposed to be funny?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 No actually, I was just going for colorful.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 What's with this guy?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 What's with you?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Uh, nothing, nothing's with him. Enjoy your coffee.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 What just happened?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 I just took your hat. See, I can be funny too. My, my joke is that I, I tookyour hat.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 That, that is funny. Can I have it back?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 No.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 No?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 No.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Ok, ok, you know what? I think you're very funny. Kudos on that hat joke. But, comeon guy just, just give him back the hat.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Why should we?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Because it's a special hat.  Seehe bought it 'cause he was feeling really down one day so he got the hat to cheer himselfup, ya know. Now Chandler...
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Stop talking, stop talking now. Let me just get this straight. You're actuallystealing my hat?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 You got a problem with that?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 No, just wanna make sure we're on the same page.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Hey, how'd the interview go?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 It bit. It was a 50's theme restraunt. I have to cook in a costume and dance onthe counter. I mean I was a chef at Cafe des Artistes. I mean howcould I take a job where I have to make something called Laverne and Curly Fries?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 So don't do it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 How can I not do it? I have $127 in the bank.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Monica, relax, go get a beer.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 I don't want a beer.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Who said it was for you?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross, Chandler	  Hhhiiii.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 What's the matter with you?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 The mean guys at the coffee house took my hat.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Noo.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 You're kiddin'.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 It was ridiculous. Ya know, these guys, they were bullies, actual bullies, ya know.  We're grown ups, this kinda stuff isn't supposed to happen anymore.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Oohhh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Hi.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Hi. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ohhh  Oh no, wait a minute, I have no one.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey, woah, let's go down there and get your hat back.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Na, forget it, it's probably stripped and sold for parts by now.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	  Hey, I went up.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 What?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 My stock, MEG, it went up 2 points. Hey guys, do you realize that if I hadinvested my $127 in myself yesterday that I'd like have...a lot more than that today. Yaknow what, I'm gonna do it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Do what?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Put all my money in me.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Monica, what are you talking about? You don't know the first thing about the stockmarket.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 What's to know? Buy sell, high low, bears bulls... Yes Manhattan...yeah telephone number of the stock...selling store.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 See, didn't I tell ya these pillows would be a good idea?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Oh God, here we go. For the first time in my life I'm gonna say 'Hi birthfather'.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 We love you, we're here for you.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Yeah good luck, good luck.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Thanks. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey Rach, you uh, you want some sandwich?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ohh, what is in that?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Olive loaf and ham spread, no mayo.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	  Hey, hey, no, oh oh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Run Phoebe run.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 No no no, doggie please. Oh, I do so wanna love all animals,please no.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Get him a bone, get a bone. You gotta bone?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Are you kidding me?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Look kibbles, bits. Oh God, alright, get the hell off my leg you yippity piece ofcrap. Ok, alright, we have a problem.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Well why don't you just reach out and take his trampoline.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok, here, I know what we can do. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey, hey, hey no.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok, doggie get the- aahhh. Ok go get the sandwich, get thesandwich doggie.  Good doggie get the sandwich, get the...ok,Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Well if he's not gonna eat it, I will.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Are you crazy?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Phoebs, he's just a little dog.  Ahhh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Hey.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 What?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Do you have to be a Century 21 real-estate agent to get towear those really cool jackets?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Do you say this stuff to girls?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Hehehehey, isn't that the guy who used to wear your hat?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 And look where they're sitting.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 You're joking, right? You guys just walked through the door.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Maybe we didn't make it clear enough.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 This couch belongs to us.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Alright, I'll tell you what, you call the couch and then, and then we'll callthe couch, and we'll see who it comes to.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 You know what I keep wondering? Why you two are still sitting here.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Alright, that's it. I've had enough of this, alright. Gunther,these guys are trying to take our seat.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Gunther	 Fellas, these guys were here first.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Oh, sorry, I didn't realize.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Sorry.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Gunther	 There you go.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Thank you Gunther. We didn't want to have to go and do that.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 He told on us?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 You told on us?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Well pal, you didn't give me much of a choice. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Don't play with his things.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 I know.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Alright, let's take this outside.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Let's, let's take this outside? Who talks like that?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 The guy that's about to kick your ass talks like that.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 You had to ask.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Ok, ok look, see, the thing is we're, we're not gonna fightyou guys.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Well then here's the deal, you won't have to so long as never ever show yourfaces in this coffee house ever again.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 I think you played the Gunther card too soon.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey Phoeb's, I think you're good to go.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah, I don't know.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 What's the matter?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 I just think that this was a really bad sign, ya know. I mean, like the beast atthe threshold, you know. It's just like, I have no family left, ya know. I mean except formy grandmother, you know, but let's face it, she's not gonna be around forever, despitewhat she says. And I have a sister who I've barely spoken to since we like shared a womb.I don't know, this is my real father and I just, I want things to be like just right.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Yeah Phoebe, I completely understand.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Yeah, whatever you need. Hey, you wanna go home?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok, thanks. Sorry, again
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	  What was that?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Uhh, I'm guessing the threshold's clear now.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 I wanna buy 5 shares of SGJ and I wanna buy them now. C'montime is money my friend. Thank you. Wooo.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Time is money my friend?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Yeah, you missed, 'Takes money to make money,' and uh, 'Don't make me come downthere and kick your wall street butt.'
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Hey, I made $17 before breakfast, what have you done?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Well uh, I had breakfast here so technically I saved $3.50.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 How did you make $17.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Well, my financially challenged friends,  I split my moneyand I bought some shares of CHP and ZXY.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 How come those?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Well, CHP because I used to have a crush on Eric Estrada. And ZXY becuase I thinkit sounds zexy.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 What happened to uh, MEG.?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 MEG was good for me but I dumped her. Ya know, my motto isget out before they go down.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 That is so not my motto.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	  Hey.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Hey Phoebs. Oh hey, how's the dog?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok, I talked to the vet, people are so nice upstate. Anyway, he said that thelittle fella's gonna be ok and I can pick him up tomorrow.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Good.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Oh, thank God.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah, but he did have to have a bunch of stitches and hesaid that only once in a blue moon does a dog's ear grow back so...still hoping.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok, so Phoebe, now are you gonna call your dad and let him know that his dog isok?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 I, I don't wanna meet my father over the phone.  What am Igonna say, like 'Hi, I'm Phoebe, the daughter you abandoned. Oh, by the way, I broke yourdog.'
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Hey Phoebs, if you want, I'll do it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok. Listen, just don't say anything about me, ok. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 DON'T...be too long with the phone.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 She'll be a much better friend when the market closes.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	  It's a woman.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 So talk to her.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Why the voice.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	  Hard to say.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Your cappucino sir.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Thank you.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ya know I think this is much better than the coffee house.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Absolutely.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 How come it's not mixing with the water?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	Well the package says you have to uh, constantly keep it moving. Stir and drink,stir and drink, never let it settle.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	  Hey, this is ridiculous. I'll tell you what. After I getback from my neice's christening, I'll go down to the coffee house with you and we'll allhave a nice cup of coffee alright. No problem, Joey's there.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 No.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 No?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 No. Man I don't wanna have to have Joey with me every time Iwanna descent cup of coffee. Ya know, and I don't wanna spend the rest of my life drinkingcappucino with a 'K'. I say you and I go back down there and stand up to those guys.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Alright, hang on a second there Custer.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Yeah really, Ross, have you ever been beaten up before?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Yeah, sure.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 By someone besides Monica?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 No. So what. So what if we get beaten up, maybe that's justsomething every man has to go through once in his life. Ya know, like a, like a right ofpassage or somethin'.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Well, couldn't we just lose our virginities again? Ya know, because I thinkactually mine's growing back.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	  I need to borrow a hundred bucks.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 What?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Hi, welcome home.  I need to borrow a hundred bucks.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 For what?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 I've gotta get back in the game.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Why, when did you get out of the game?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 I don't know, I lost it all ok. I lost it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Oh no.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Hey, I've come to terms with it, you have to too.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Ok. Look uhh, Mon I'm, I'm really sorry.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 Yeah, yeah, yeah, where are we on the hundred bucks?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 I, I don't have it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Monica	 But I need it. Otherwords I'm gonna have to take thathorrible diner job. You know, with the dancing and the costumes. I don't wanna have towear flame retardant boobs.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Nobody does honey.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Hi.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 Schnoodle. Oh my God, what the hell happened to my dog?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 It was an accident, and, and the woman who did this would never ever hurt a dog onpurpose. She's a vegetarian.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 What are these, stitches?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah, eight of them. That's 56 to him. You know also, if, if it's raining, youcan't let him look up too long 'cause that cone'll fill up really really fast.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 Yeah well, thanks for bringing back what's left of him.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Sure, oh, is, is Frank home.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 How do you know Frank?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Just from a, from a long time ago. Is he here?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 Yeah. Frank.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Yeah. What? 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Oh, ok, um, I mean Frank senior.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 He went out for groceries.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok so will he be back soon?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Mrs Buffay	 Well he left four years ago so we're expecting him back any minute now.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Alright, I'm, I'm gonna go. I'm sorry about the dog, everything. I'm sorry.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Hey lady. Hey wait up. How do you know my dad?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Um well I don't really. Just genetically. He's kinda my dad too.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Heavy.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah. So um, did he ever talk about me, Phoebe?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 No but he didn't really talk about anything.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Oh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Except stilts.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Stilts?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Yeah, he loved stilts. One time I was upstairs, I was stealing cigarettes out of mymom's purse, and uh, all of a sudden I look over and there's my dad's head bobbing pastthe window. He just had this big smile on his face and he was waving 'cause he was alwayshappiest when he was on his stilts.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Wow.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 I don't know what to do with that.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Me neither. So you're like my big sister.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 This is huge, you can buy me beer.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 I'm not gonna. But you know what's cool though? Ok, if you had a friend namedPete, then I could say, 'Oh yeah, I know Pete, he's friends with my brother.'
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 I gotta friend named Mark.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 That'll work too.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Cool, alright. So maybe, ya know, I could give you a call sometime, we could talkor somethin'.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Yeah, that'd be ok.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Alright.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok, I'm in the book.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Ok, yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Alright. So um, stilts huh?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Frank	 Yeah hey, you know if you want I can take you around back and show you where he hithis head on the rain gutter.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Ok.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Well we did it, we're here. We are standing our ground. Howlong does a cup of coffee take?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Would you come on! Come on!  Thank you.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ah, there we go.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 I think we proved our point.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 You burn your mouth?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Cannot feel my tounge.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Bullies, big bullies.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Oh, look who's here, it's the weenies.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Did we not make ourselves clear the other day.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Yes, and that's why we're here.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Yes, we're standing out ground...apparently.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Let's do this alright.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Woah, ho-ho, whad'ya got there, a weapon?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 It's a nice watch, I don't wanna break it on your ribs.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Alright, let's do this.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Alright.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Question. If I don't care about my watch, can I use it as a weapon?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Whad'ya mean?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Well, it's sharp, it's metal, I think I can do some, you know, serious damagewith it.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 No, you can't use your watch.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Or your keys.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Look, here's what we'll do. We'll put all keys and watches in the hat overthere. Alright. Alright, c'mon man, let's do this.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Before I forget, are we hitting faces?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Of course we're hitting faces, why wouldn't you hit faces?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Well because I have to work on Monday, I have a big presentation.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Actually, you know, uh, I gotta show this apartment tomorrow and uh, youknow, this no faces thing might not be a bad idea.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Ok, nothing from the neck up.  Or the waistdown. Dana's ovulating.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Oh really, you guys tryin' again?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Yeah.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok, so let me just get this straight. So we're uh, strictly talking about themiddle?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 C'MON!
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Hey, hey, woah, you want some of this, huh? You want a piece of this, huh? I'mstandin here, huh.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Hey, hey, those guys are takin our stuff! 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Hey.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Hey.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 God, that was, that was amazing, that was incredible. Youguys, you guys kicked butt.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 Us, what about you guys? Man you really, bing, gave it to old Mr. Clean backthere. He was a big guy.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Yeah he was wasn't he.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Yeah, I wouldn't know having missed everything.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Big Bully	 Don't do that to yourself. Any one of us could have tripped over that littlegirls jump-rope.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 So, listen guys, are we uh, are we ok here?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 We're ok.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Ross	 Alright.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Ok so, can I have my hat back?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Little Bully	 No.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Huh. 
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Rachel	 Look at her.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Hi Monica.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 He-he-he, how's it goin'?
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Phoebe	 Hey nice boobs.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Chandler	 Guys guys, check this out.
02	21	0221	The One With The Bullies	Joey	 Excellent.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 So, I'll get candles and my mom's lace tablecloth, and since it's Rachel'sbirthday, I mean, we want it to be special, I thought I'd poach a salmon.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	All	 Ohhh.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 What?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Question. Why do we always have to have parties where youpoach things?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 You wanna be in charge of the food committee?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Question two. Why do we always have to have parties with committees?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Really. Why can't we just get some pizzas and get some beers and have fun?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Yeah.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Yeah, I agree. Ya know, I think fancy parties are only funif you're fancy on the inside and I'm just not sure we are.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Alright. If you guys don't want it to be special, fine. You can throw any kind ofparty you want.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Joey they're not real. I start miles beneath the surface ofthese things, ok, they're fake. See  honk honk.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Wow, it's, it's like porno for clowns.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 I talked to Rachel's sisters, neither of them can come.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, um so, I still have to invite Dillon and Emma and Shannon Cooper.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Woah, woah, woah, uh, no Shannon Cooper.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Why not her?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Cause she uh, she steals stuff.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Or maybe she doesn't steal stuff and Joey just slept with her and never calledher back.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Joey that is horriable.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Hey I liked her, alright. Maybe, maybe too much. I don't knowI guess I just got scared.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I didn't know.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 I didn't think anyone'd buy that, ok.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Hi honey, how did it go?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Agh, it was the graduation from hell.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Ya know, my cousin went to hell on a football scholarship.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ya know, I mean this is supposed to be a joyous occasion. Mysister's graduating from college, nobody thought she would. It's a true testament to whata girl from long island would do for a Celica.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 So what happened?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 My parents happened. All they had to do was sit in the same stadium, smileproudly, and not talk about the divorce. But nooo, they got into a huge fight in themiddle of the commencement address. Bishop Tutu actually had to stop and shush them. Butyou know what, you know what the good news is? I get to serve coffee for the next 8 hours.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Ok, so I guess we don't invite her parents.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Well, how bout just her mom?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Why her mom?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Cause I already invited her.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Ooh, ooh, did you ask Stacy Roth?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Oh no, can't invite her. She also steals.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Ok, here are the birthday candles. Where's the birthday cake?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, we're not having birthday cake, we're having birthday flan.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Excuse me?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Oh that's nice. Happy birthday Rachel, here's some goo.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	  Dr. Greene. Oh my God it's Rachel's dad. What're you doinghere?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 What? The father can't drop by to see the daughter on her birthday?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 No no, the father can, but um, since I am the roommate I can tell you that she'snot here and I'll pass along the message, ok. So bye-bye.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Ohhh, you're having a parteee.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 No, no, not a party. Just a surprise gathering of some people Rachel knows. Um,this is Phoebe and Chandler and Joey.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 I'll never remember all of that. So uh, what's the deal?Rachel comes home, people pop out and yell stuff, is that it?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 This isn't your first surprise party, is it sir?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Hi Monica.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Chinese menu guy. Forgot the menus.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 So, basically just a Chinese guy.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Uh, hey, Dr. Greene, why don't you come with me, we'll put your jacket on Rachel'sbed.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Alright, that sounds like a two person job. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Well, my goodness, what was that?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Sandra, I am so sorry, I thought you were Rachel and we just weren't ready for youyet.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 You thought I was Rachel?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Yes because uh, you look so young.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 And because you're both, you know, white women.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Oh, I missed you kids. Well, should I put my coat in the bedroom?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 NO! No, I'll take that for ya.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Oh well thank you. Such a gentleman. Thank you. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Ok, think, what would Jack and Chrissy do?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	  oh, ok we can come back out in the living room.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 So uh, Joey and Chanlder, I, I think it's time that you take Dr. Greene over toyour place.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Uhh, yes, absdolutely, um. Why again?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Because that's where the party is you goon. See this is just the staging area.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Right this is staging.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Yeah, this more than anything else, is the staging area.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Alright you guys are off to party number one Alright fellas, let's keep it movin', let' keep it movin.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Chandler could you at least send some women to my party?  Alrightthat's Ross.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Ok, they're coming, shhh. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ohh, thank you for the wonderful dinner.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Thanks for being born.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ohh, thank you for my beautiul earrings, they're perfect. Ilove you.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Oh, now you can exchange them if you want, ok.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Now I love you even more.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	All	 Surprise.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Oh my gosh, wow. Monica. Oh my god. Mom. This is so great.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Happy birthday sweetie.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Wow you, you. I had no idea.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Really?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 No, I knew.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 All right.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, everybody, there's food and drinks on the table. Go across the hall.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 What?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 What?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Right now, Joey and Chandler's, go now.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Why.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Just go.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	All	 Surprise.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Happy birthday sweetpea.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Daddy.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Both of them are here, both of them, both of them are here?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Well, we could count again.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 I can't believe this is happening.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 You know what, this is ridiculous, ok. This is your birthday,this is your party. I say we just put 'em all together and if they can't deal with it, whocares.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 I do.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 That's who.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Look, are you gonna be ok?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could lookat the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Well, actually just one birthday flan.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 What?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 It's a traditional Mexican custard dessert...Look talk to Monica, she's on thefood committee.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Joey, Joey. Hey, some girl just walked up to me and said, 'I want you Dennis,'and stuck her tounge down my throat. I love this party.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Quick volleyball question.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Volleyball.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Yeah, we set up a court in your room. Uh, you didn't reallylike that grey lamp, did you?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Joey, a woman just stuck her tounge down my throat, I'm not even listening toyou.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Girl'S Voice	 Dennis.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Ok, that's me. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Listen honey, can you keep dad occupied, I'm gonna go talk to mom for a while.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Ok, do you have any ideas for any openers?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Uhh, let's just stay clear of 'I'm the guy that's doing you daughter' and youshould be ok.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok people, I want you to take a piece of paper, here you go, and write down yourmost embarassing memory. Oh, and I do ask that when you're not using the markers, you putthe caps back on them because they will dry out.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Hi Dr. Greene. So, uh, how's everything in the uh, vascularsurgery....game?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 It's not a game Ross, a woman died on my table today.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 I'm sorry. See that's the good thing about my job. All the dinosaurs on my table arealready dead.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Listen you guys, I don't mean to be a pain about this but, um, I've noticed thatsome of you are just placing them on. You wanna push the caps until you hear them click. Gunther, where're you going?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Gunther	 I um, was sorta thinking about maybe...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 No. No you can't go. No this is fun. Come on we're just getting started. Here,here's your marker.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Listen if you wanna go, just go.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Gunter	 No, she'll yell at me again.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Alright, I can get you out.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Gunther	 What?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Shh. In a minute, I'm gonna create a diversion. When I do, walk quickly to thedoor and don't look back.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 I think I need a drink.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Oh, here, I, I'll get it for ya. Whad'ya want?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Scotch.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Scotch. Alright, I'll be back in 10 seconds with your scotch on the rocks in aglass.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Neat.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Cool.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 No no no, no no no, neat, as in no rocks.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 I know.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Oh hello Ross, where have you been?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Hi. Uh, I have been in the bathroom. Stay clear of the salmon mousse.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Oh, scotch neat. Ya know, that's Rachel's father's drink.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Oh, mine too. Isn't that neat, scotch neat. Would you excuse me?  Hey, hey, where youuh, sneakin off to mister?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 I'm getting my cigarettes out of my jacket.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 No. no.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Whad'ya mean no?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 No, um, see 'cause that, that is, that is the staging area. If you go in there,it'll ruin the whole illusion of the party. Yeah, I think you take your scotch back inthere and I will get your cigarettes for you sir.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Get my glasses too.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 All righty roo. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, the first person's most embarassing memory is, 'Monica, your party sucks.'Very funny.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Oh no, ooh, ooh, did somebody forget to use a coaster?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 What?  I don'tsee anything.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Great, I'm seeing water rings again.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Geller	 Ross, whose glasses are those?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Mine.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 You wear bi-focals?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Um-hmm.  I have a condition, apparently, that I require two differentsets of focals.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Did you know my husband has glasses just like that?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Well those are very popular frames.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Neil Sedaka wears them.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Guy	  I hear you can get people out of here.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Rachel, you didn't tell me your boyfriend smoked.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Yeah, like a chimney.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Ohh, big smoker. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Are you wearing my glasses?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 Yes.  I was just warming up theearpieces for you.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Thank you. Is that one of my cigarettes?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	  Yeah, yes it is,I was just moistening the tip.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Ok, ok, she's taking the trash out so I can get you out ofhere but it has to be now, she'll be back any minute.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Girl 1	 What about my friend Victor?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 No, only the three of you, any more than that and she'll get suspicious.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Girl 1	 Alright, let me just get my coat.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 There isn't time. You must leave everything. They'll take care of you next door.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Girl 1	 Is it true they have beer?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Everything you've heard is true.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Could you guys please try to keep it down, we're trying to start a Boggletournament.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 You, and you, you're supposed to be at my party. And Gunther! What are you doinghere?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Gunther	 Um 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	  Ok, welcome to the fu-oh.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Phoebe.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Alright, I'm sorry but these people needed me. They work hard all week, it'sSaturday night, they deserve to have a little fun. Go.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ya know, my party is fun. I mean, maybe it's a little quieter, less obvious sortafun but, you know, if people would just give it a chance... 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 You want me to see a therapist?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Sweetheart, you obviously have a problem. You've chosen a boyfriend exactlylike your father.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ok mom, you know what, fine, I'll make an appointment ok, but you know what, rightnow, I gotta go, I gotta go do a thing.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 Did you know your mother spent $1200 dollars on bansai trees. I felt likeGulliver around that place.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Daddy, daddy, you know what, I really wanna hear more about this, I really do, butI just have, I just have to do a, some stuff.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 You work and you work and you work at a marriage but all he cares about ishis stupid boat.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 You work and you work and you work on a boat...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 He always ridiculed my pottery classs...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 ...and you sand it and you varnish it...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 ...but when all is said and done, he still drinks out of the mugs.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 ...and her yoga and her Bridges of Madison County...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 ...the scotch and the cigarettes...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 ...and the bansai's and the chiuaua...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 ...I may have only been in therapy for three weeks now dear but...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 ...what the hell does she want with half a boat...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	  Hey, how you holdin' up there, tiger?Oh, sorry, when my parents were getting divorced I got a lot of tigers. Got a lot ofchamps, chiefs, sports, I even got a governor.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 This is it, isn't it? I mean, this is what my life is gonnabe like. My mom there, my dad there. Thanksgiving, Christmas. She gets the house, he's insome condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. Oh, Chandler how did you get throughthis?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Well, I relied on a carefully regimented program of denial and, and wetting thebed.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ya know, I just, so weird. I mean I was in there justlistening to them bitch about each other and all I kept thinking about was the fourth ofJuly.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Becasue it reminded you of the way our forefathers used to bitch at each other?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 It's just this thing. Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch thefireworks. Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. My sister Jillwould be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset becasue nobody was helpingand then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. But then when thefireworks started, everybody just shut up, you know, and it'd get really cold, and wewould all just sort of smush under this one blanket. It never occured to anybody to bringanother one. And now it's just...
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 I, I know. 
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, thanks for coming, I hope you guys had fun.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Alright, Monica dear, I'm gonna hit the road. Now I've left my 10 verbs onthe table. And you be sure and send me that finished poem.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok will do. So glad you came.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 I think I saw Rachel out in the hall.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, let me go check. Your mom want's to say goodbye.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Oh ok.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Happy birthday sweetie.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ok.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Ahh, you drive safe.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Ross, what're you doing.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Ross	 I'm getting ready for the water skiing.  How are you doing?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Well, uh, Dr. Greene, where are you going?
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 To get my coat.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Guys	 No no no.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	Alright, alright, I can get my own coat.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Sorry, we're on a major flan high.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Oh no, you're not supposed to be here. This is the staging area, you should, it'sall wrong, you should leave, ya know, get out. Or perhaps you'd like a creme d'menthe.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mr. Greene	 I have to be heading to my chateau, thank you.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Oh all right, then I guess we're going back into the hallway.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Thanks for coming Mrs. Greene.  Well, ok, you take care.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Mrs. Greene	 Oh, you kids  Well, this is the best partyI've been to in years.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Thank you.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok everybody, it's time for flan.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Chandler	 Yup, get ready for the gelatenous fun.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Joey	 Kinda looks like that stuff you get when you get a bad infection.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Monica	 Ok, that's enough.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Phoebe	 Ok Rachel, make a special flan wish.
02	22	0222	The One With The Two Parties	Rachel	 Ok, I've got one.  Wow, those things almost never come true.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Ok, Chandler, Mon, there's only one bananna nut muffin left.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Oh, I ordered mine first.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Yeah, but I'm, I'm so much faster...
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Give it to me.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 No.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Give it to me.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Ok, you can have it. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 There you go, enjoy your coffee.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 That was there when I got here. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	  Hey you guys, you will never guess who's coming to New York.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	  Quick, Phoebe, tell us before he can swallow.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Oh ok, Ryan, that guy I went out with, who's in the Navy.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 You went out with a guy in the Navy?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Yeah, I met him when I was playing guitar in Washington Square Park. Ryan threw insalt water taffy 'cause he didn't have any change.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Hey, is that when you wrote salt water taffy man?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 No. No, he is my submaring guy. He resurfaces like every couple years and we havethe most amazing three days together. Only this time he's coming for two weeks. Two wholeweeks, which means yay.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 So wait, this guy goes down for like two years at a time?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 That'll teach you to lick my muffin.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	  Hiii.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Oh no, what happened?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Well, I just spoke to Carol. Ben's got the chicken pox.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	All	 Oh no.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Yeah, so if you haven't already had it, chances are you're gonna get it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Well I've had it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Yeah, I've had it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Had it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Had it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Well, I've never had it, I feel so left out.  Ohlook!
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Honey, you made the bed again. I told you, you don't have todo that. This isn't camp.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Ooh, then I guess the panty raid last night was totally uncalled for. Ok, I amgoing to take a shower and today I will be singing Jim Crochee's Leroy Brown.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Monica...  Hey Mon, I have a question. Is Leroy the baddest man in the whole damn town or thefattest man in the whole damn town?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Baddest. Otherwise the song would be Fat Fat Leroy Brown.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 What're you doing?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Just waiting for you sweetie.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Are you remaking the bed?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You know what, the way you did it was just fine.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Then, you're redoing it because...
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 If I tell you, you'll think I'm crazy.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 You're pretty much running that risk either way.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Ok, you see, the tag shouldn't be at the top left corner, it should be at thebottom right corner.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Oh, well that's not so crazy.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 I'm just easing you in.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Oh, alright.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Alright, you see these little flower blossoms? They should be facing up, not down,because, well, the head of the bed is where the sun would be. You don't love me any moredo you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Actually, if it's possible, I love you more.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Really? Wow, well then come on, I wanna show you how to foldthe toilet paper into a point.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Hey, look Joey, I'm just saying if you need something to hold you over, I canget you a job right here as an entry level processor.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 But don't you need experience for a job like that?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 It's not that hard to learn. And as for people realizing you have no idea whatyou're doing, hey, you're an actor. Act like a processor, people will think you're aprocessor.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Scott	  Hey Chandler, here's this morning's projections.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Hey thanks. Scott Alexander, Joey Tribbianni. Joey is a uh, fellow processor.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Scott	 No kidding.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Oh yeah yeah. I process. People want the processing, I'm theone they call.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Scott	 Where do you work?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Uhh, well, right now I'm in between things. You know how it is. One day you'reprocessing, the next day you're not so much... processing any more.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 I was just telling Joey about the opening in Fleischman's group.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Scott	 Fleischman's group. Whatever you do, don't touch his sandwiches. Ha-ha-ha...
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Ha-ha.  Are all you processors dorks?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Oh, this lipstick looks just great on you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 You look fabulous honey, you really do.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Yeah? Are you sure, really. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 You see, you look beautiful. For god sakes, dim the lights.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 I, I, I'm hideous.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 It's gonna be ok. Ryan's been under water. He's just gonnabe so glad that you don't have barnicles on your butt.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Come in.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Hey baby, I'm back... 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Hey Ryan, what's up?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 What's goin' on?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Well, no no, you have to stay back. I, I have the pox.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Chicken or small?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Chicken. Which is so ironic considering I'm a vegetarian.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Why aren't you at home in bed?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 'Cause my, my grandmother's never had chicken pox. Please, please tell me youhave, 'cause oh my God, I forgot how cute you are.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 I'm sorry, I never had 'em.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Ohh, ohh.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 If I had one wish, it would be to build a time machine, goback to when I was 7, when Jimmy Hauser had the chicken pox. I would grab that kid and rubhim all over my face.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Yeah, or you know, you could just wish that I didn't have them now.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Can I please see your face?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Nope. You don't want to see a face covered with pox.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Your face could be covered with lochs, I wouldn't care.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 And you hate fish. Oh. That's so sweet, alright. Ok, alright, you can see. This isme...  Oh, I am scary.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Sorry, the lightning. Lightning was an unfortunate incidence. You look lovely,lovely.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 I hate this. 'Cause I tell you, I had the most amazing twoweeks planned for us, and almost everything I had in mind, we had to be a lot closer thanthis.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Phoebe, I have spent the last eight months in a steel tube with men, thinking aboutthis moment. I am not gonna let a bunch of itchy spots stand between us. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Ok, this is the most romantic disease I've ever had.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Hey.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Hey, how's the first day goin'?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Pretty good. It's like you said. It's mostly just putting numbers from one columninto another column.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Well there you go.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Hey and everbody is so nice. I just had a good talk with that lady with the redhair, Jeannie.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Jeannie, the head of east coast operations Jeannie?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Yeah, turns out our kids go to the same school. Small worldhuh?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Weird world. Your kids?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 I figure my character has kids.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Ya know there isn't a part of that sentence I don't need explained.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Well, see when you're acting you need to think about stufflike that. My character, Joseph the processor guy, has two little girls, Ashley andBrittany. Ashley copies everything Brittany does.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Well, invisible kids can be that way sometimes.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Yeah. Joseph and his wife, Karen, are thinking of having athird kid... Ya know what? Just did.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Really? Wow. That's some pretty powerful imaginary sperm you must have there.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 You know what makes the itching even worse?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 That you don't stop talking about it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Fine.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Let's just play, ok. Good, ok.  Here we go, come to mama,just getting ready to roll the dice...
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 What're you doing? Are you scratching?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 No. This is what I do for luck, ok.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 You're scratching. Give me the dice.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 No.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Give me the dice.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 No. Here.  There. Ooh, double sixes.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 We can't scratch. You know we can't, we'll scar.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Uhh, I can't stop thinking about it. It's just so hard. I just wanna grab allthese houses and rub 'em all over my body. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 No.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Give it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 No.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Yeah, come on. You know you want it, you know you want it too, come on. Let's justbe bad, it'll feel so good. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Oh God help me.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Now do me, do my back. Oh come on, harder.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Oh, stop that, stop that right now.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 You know, I might have expected this of you Phoebe, but Ryan, you're a military man.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 You and Milton have to join us on the boat. Karen'll pack a lunch, you'll bring thekids, we'll make a day of it.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Jeannie	 Oh, that sounds lovely. We're gonna have to set that up. Oh, I better get back.Hope the baby feels better.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Oh, thanks, thanks. Bye bye Jeannie.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Jeannie	 Bye bye Joey.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 What a phony.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Well, I'm sure you'll teach her a lesson when she steps off the dock ontonothing. Hey Mr. Douglas.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Sir.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Mr. Douglas	 Uh, listen Bing, I received your memo. So, we're not gonna receive thesystems report until next Friday?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Well the people in my group wanna spend the holiday weekend with their families.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Mr. Douglas	 I have a family, I'm gonna be here.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Yeah Bing, what's that about?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 It's about cutting my people a little slack, ya know, for morale. Look, if youwanna see some rough numbers, I can get them to you by Wednesday.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Mr. Douglas	 Rough numbers?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 This company was not built on rough numbers. Am I right Mr. Douglas.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Mr. Douglas	 Have the final numbers on my desk by Tuesday.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Uh, if you say so sir.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Joseph's good, isn't he?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Well, I'm going to kill you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Hey, hey, I just figure Joseph's the kinda guy that likes to mix it up. Ya know, getin there, ruffle some feathers.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Why?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Look, I'm sorry but that's what Joseph does, ok. If you try to pull somethin', he'llcall you on it. 'What're you tryin' to pull,' he'll say.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Ooh, duct tape. Was I supposed to bring something too?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 This is for the scratchy twins out there. I taped oven mits to their hands.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 You're strict.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 It's for their own good.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 You know, I like the way you have efficiently folded thistab under. See in a tape emergency you could shave valuable seconds off your time.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Exactly. Oh, I love that I can be totally neurotic aroundyou now. Tell me the truth. Don't you like it better now thateverything on your desk is perpendicular?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 If it's not a right angle, it is a wrong angle.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Very good.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Thank you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 You know what. Tomorrow I'm gonna do your clocks.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 You're gonna do what to my clocks.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 I'm gonna set them to my time.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Well, I'm confused. I thought we shared time.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No no. See, in my bedroom I set my clock six minutes fast.You wanna know why?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Because it's in a slightly different time zone than the kitchen.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No forget it, I'm not gonna tell you now.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 No come on. Come on tell me.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No. See you don't understand.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Come on.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No. You don't have any of these cute little obsessive things.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 No that's not true. That is not true.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Oh yeah.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Yeah.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Alright, well tell me one of yours.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Ok. Ahh. One of my things is, I always separate my sweat socks from my dresssocks.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 What if they get mixed up?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Boy I would just uh, I would freak out.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 You would not. I can't believe this. I hate this, you're toonormal. I can't believe my boyfriend doesn't have a thing. My boyfriend doesn't have athing.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 See, if anyone overheard that, I didn't come off well.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Hey. Mr. Douglas is looking for you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Why? Wh- wh- why is Mr. Douglas looking for me?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 'Cause he has a strong suspicion that you dropped the ball on the Lender project.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Wha- wh- why, why, why does he suspect that?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Becasue at first he thought it was Joseph. But after he asked Joseph about it, turnsout it was you. Anyway, I just thought you should know.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Alright, that's it. Look Joey, I'm sorry, I realize this is the role of alifetime for ya, and if I could just fire Joseph, I would, but unfortunately that's notpossible so I'm gonna have to let both of you go.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 What're you talking about, everybody loves Joseph.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 I don't, I hate Joseph, ok. I think he's a brown-nosing suck up.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Oh yeah. Well you can't fire Joseph. You know why, 'cause he's not in yourdepartment.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Alright, ok, alright. So I can't fire Joseph but uh, I can sleep with his wife.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Karen.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Yeah, Karen. I'm thinking about having an affair with her.Oh, you know what? I just did.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Ahh. What the hell are you doing to me man.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Oh well it's not me, it's my character, Chandy. Yeah therogue processor who seduces his co-worker's wives for sport and then laughs about it thenext day at the water cooler. In fact, I have her panties right there in my drawer.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Really?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 No freakshow, she's fictional.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 Take it easy. If it means that much to you, I'll uh, I'll go find something else.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Chandler	 Thank you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Joey	 It's just that, I, I'm gonna miss Joseph. I liked him. His wife, she was hot.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Can I please take these off? I swear I won't scratch.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 No sorry hon, Monica's orders.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	  Well that wasn'teasy.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Ok, dinner's on.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 And there's a peach cobbler warming in the oven so the plate's gonna be hot butthat shouldn't be a problem for you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Alright you kids, bye now.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe, Ryan	 Bye. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Oh look, a low budget puppet show.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 It's such a shame you can't see which finger I'm holding up.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Wine?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Please. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Oh, I spilled some.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 I got it. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	  I must tell you, you look beautiful tonight.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 What?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Sorry. You look beautiful.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Oh.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 You know what, that's it, that's it. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Monica, wake up. Monica.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 What's up?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 I thought of a thing.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Yeah?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Yeah. I have to sleep, have to, on this side of the bed.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No honey. You have to sleep on this side of the bed because I have to sleep onthis side of the bed.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Or so I would have you believe.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 No. Big deal, so you have a side of the bed, everybody has a side of the bed.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Hey come on, you haven't heard my reason yet.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Alright, go on.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Ok, I have to sleep on the west side because I grew up in California andotherwise the ocean would be on the wrong side.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Monica	 Oh my God, you're a freak.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Richard	 Yeah. How 'bout that.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 So uh, Ryan, were you shipping off to?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 I really can't say.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 So do you have like any nuclear weapons on board?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 I can't say.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Well do you get to look through one of those like, those periscope thingys.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 I'm sorry, but I can't say.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Wow, it, it's neat learning about submarines.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 I better get out of here, I'm gonna miss my flight.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Ok, I'll walk you out.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Bye Ryan.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Pleasure.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 It was nice to meet you.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Take care.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 So do you uh, think we can get you one of those uh, uniform things?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 You like that do ya?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 I'll make some calls. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Ok.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Can you believe how we spent our two weeks together?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 I know. We didn't do any of the romantic things I hadplanned, like having a picnic at Central Park and ya know, coffee at Central Perk. Oh Ijust got that. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ryan	 Taxi.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Phoebe	 Bye you. 
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Oh I'm sorry, we're clo-... Hey sailor.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Is this what you had in mind?
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 I'll say.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 I'm shipping out tomorrow.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Rachel	 Well then uh, we better make this night count.  Oh, you know what. I forgot to turn offthe bathroom light.
02	23	0223	The One With The Chicken Pox	Ross	 Alright you know, why don't I just meet you upstairs. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Hey Joey, how'd the audition go?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Incredible! I met the director this time and you'll never believe who it was.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 Who?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 All right. I'll give you one hint. Warren Beatty.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 Wow!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Yeah, there's just one thing that might be kind've a problem. See, I, uh, had tokiss this guy.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 'Cause he was just so darn cute.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 No, as part of the audition. See, I'm up for this part of this guy, who the main guykisses.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Well, hey. You're an actor, I say you just suck it up and do it.  Or you just do it.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 I did do it, I'm a professional.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Then what's the problem?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 See after the scene, Mr. Beatty comes up to me and says 'good actor, bad kisser'.Can you believe that, me not a good kisser, that's like, like Mother Theresa, not a goodmother. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Well, come on, who cares what that guy thinks. What does Warren Beatty know aboutkissing  Ooh.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Hey, what did your agent say?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Yep, this kiss thing is defiantly a problem, Mr. Beatty wants to see it again onMonday. Man, I gotta figure out what I'm doing wrong. Oh, okay, one of you girls come overhere and kiss me.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 What, forget it!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Yeah, right.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Come on, I need your help here.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 All right. I'll do it, I kissed him before I can do it again.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 You see this, this is a friend.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, let's go.  Oh, wait I have gum. Okay.  Good, very good, firm but tender. I'd recommend you to a friend.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Then I don't know what it is. What's the problem?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Joey, you know, maybe your just not used to kissing men, maybe you just tensed upa little, maybe that's what you need to work on.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Yeah, that makes sense. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Over my dead body! 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 And I'll be using his dead body as a shield.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	  Come on out, honey! I'm telling you look good! Tell her she looks good,tell her she looks good.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	  Oh my God, you look so good!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people lookinglike something you drink when your nauseous.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 So don't, I don't see why we have to go to this thing anyway, it's yourex-fiancee's wedding.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Because I promised Mindy I would.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Yeah, well you promised Barry, you'd marry him. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Look you guys, I have to go, I'm the Maid-of-Honor. And besides you know what Ijust need to be in a room again with these people and feel good about myself.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Ooh-oh! Someone's wearing the same clothes they had on last night. Someone get alittle action?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 I may have.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Woo-hoo, stuud!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 What's she look like?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Well, we haven't exactly met, we just stayed up all night talking on theinternet.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Woo-hoo, geeek!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 I like this girl, okay, I seriously like this girl, you now how sometimes I tendget a little defended and quipy...
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Get out!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Nooo!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Please!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Well she totally called me on it, okay. She said, 'cut it out, get real', and Idid.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Wow! What's that like?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 It's like this, me, no jokes.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 All right, stop it, you're freaking me out.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Oh, yeah, I don't like you this way. All right, I'll see you guys later.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 Bye, Richard.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Bye sweetie,  I love you.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 I love you, too.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 I think my boyfriend ever so dreamy, I wonder what our wedding's gonna be like.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 What are you talking about? What wedding?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Come on, like you never talk that.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Nooo! Never! I mean, we're living in the moment. God, it is so nice for once tonot have to get all hung up on 'Where is this going?'
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Afraid to ask him?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Could not be more terrified.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Well, I think you should seriously consider the marriage thing, give Rachelanother chance to dress up like Princess Bubble Yum.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	  Where's Benny?  There he is!  Where's Benny, there he is.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Awww! You know that's probably why babies learn to talk, so they can tell grownups to cut it out.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Hey, you know I got a question for ya. Just a little thing, no pressure. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Okay.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Did you ever, uh, like, think about the future?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Sure I do.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Yeah, am I in it?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Honey, you are in it.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Oh God, you are about to get sooo lucky.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Oh, yeah!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Keep talkin'.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Well, uh, sometimes I think about selling my practice, we could move to France,make French toast.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Okay, so, uh, we're in France, we're making the toast. Do you see a littlebassinet in the corner?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Like a hound?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Not a basset, a bassinet.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 You really need the bassinet?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Well, I just think the baby would keep falling off the dog. Do you, uh, do you ,do you not see kids in our future.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Oh, hey. I love children, I have children. I just don't want to be 70 when ourkids go off to college, and our lives can finally start.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Uh-huh.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Look I want you, now.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 That's Great. You know we don't need to talk about this now. Really, I mean thisis, is so way, way, way, in the future, I'm talkin' hovercrafts and apes taking over theplanet.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Come on, Chandler, I want this part soo much.  Just one kiss,I won't tell anyone.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Joey, no means no!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Hey!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 I'm sorry we, we don't have your sheep.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Aww, Rach, I think you look cute  Andyou, uh, you, you I could eat with a spoon .
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Get away from me I said no!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	  Richard buzzed. He's waiting downstairs.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, Richard's here. I should run down say bye to him 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 Bye.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Bye, good luck.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 So how's your date with your cyberchick going. Ooh, hey, what is all that .
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Oh, it's a website, it's the, uh, the Guggenheim museum. See, she likes art, and I like funny words.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 What does she mean by HH?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	  It means we're holding hands.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Are you the cutest?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 I'm afraid I might just be.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 You know, what I think is so great that you are totally into this person and yetfor all you know she could be like 90 years old, or have two heads, or. It could be a guy.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Okay, it's not a guy, all right, I know her.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 It could be like a big giant guy.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	  Man, I got this close to him  and Monica kneed mein the back. What's going on?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 We were just wondering if Chandler's girlfriend is a girl.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, well. Just ask her how long she's gonna live. Women live longer than men.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 How do you not fall down more?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Okay, ask her 'What is her current method of birth control?'
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 All right.  "My husband is sleeping with hissecretary." She's married! 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Well at least we know she's a woman.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 I can't believe she's married.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Aw, man I'm sorry . This must be very tough forya, huh .
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 So, I read this article in the paper the other day that says you're not supposedto throw rice at weddings, because when pigeons eat rice it kills them.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Oh, that's why you never see pigeons at sushi bars. See, we're having fun.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Oh, absolutely. Yeah, you know I'm not even thinking about that thing that we'renot supposed to think about.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Neither am I.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Hey, there. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Hi.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Are you all right?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Yeah, when I was in the bathroom I saw the window that I crawled out of at mywedding, and God, I just started thinking that I shouldn't be here, you know I shouldn't,people are going to be looking at me and judging me and, and thinking about the last time.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Sweetie, it's be gonna okay, all right. It's a wedding, generally people focus onthe bride.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 God I know, you're right.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Wedding Planner	 All rightie, everybody look at me. Good. All right, its time. Bridesmaidsand ushers let's see two lines, thank you.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Okay, I'll see you after the thing.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Okay, good luck 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Thank you, Okay, Okay. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Why the hell didn't you tell me!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 I'm sorry. What was I supposed to do stand up and shout 'Hey, Rachel, your butt isshowing!'
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh my God this is sooo humiliating. I think the only thing that tops that was,was, was when I was in the eight grade and I had to sing the Copa Cabana in front of theentire school. I think I got about two lines into it before I ran and freaked out. Oh myGod, my entire life is flashing before my eyes.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Rach, hey look, I remember that, it wasn't so bad.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh Ross, would you stop, you got me, I'm dating you.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mr. Wineburg	 Rachel!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh hi, Mr. Wineburg, hi Mrs. Wineburg.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mr. Wineburg	 It's so wonderful to see you again, my dear, in fact I hardly expected tosee so much.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mrs. Wineburg	 You told me you didn't see anything.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mr. Wineburg	 I tell ya a lot things!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mrs. Wineburg	 Well it's wonderful to have you up and about, again, dear.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mr. Wineburg	 Stay well.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mindy	  Rach! Rach!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mindy	 Oh my God, I'm married!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 I know.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mindy	 I'm Mrs. Dr. Barry Hunter hyphen Farber.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh honey, I'm so proud of you, Min.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Barry	  Min. Oh Rach, you're still here, at our wedding, they were packing upthe chopped liver about now.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Yeah, I love that story. Um, I got a question for you guys. Why do people keep issaying that is good to see me up and about?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mindy	 Well uh, after you ran out on your wedding, Barry's parents told people that youwere sort of....insane.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Insane!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Mindy	 ...from the syphilis.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 What?!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Barry	 Yeah, what are they gonna say you didn't love me anymore. Come on.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Angela? Joey Tribiani. Listen, what are ya doing tonight. I know your seeing thatguy I was thinking maybe you could bring him.....Hello? Hello? (picks up a statue of anIndian and walks into 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Aren't you gonna answer her, that's like the tenth bing-bong message she sent. Shewants to know what's wrong?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 What's wrong? What's wrong? You're married that's what's wrong.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, my.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 What?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 She wants to meet you in person.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Hey, look, Phoebe I wanted to meet her in person too, okay, but she's married,she has a husband.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 What if the husband person is the wrong guy, and you are the right guy. I mean youdon't get chances like this all the time, if you don't meet her now, you're gonna bekicking yourself when your 80, which is hard to do, and that's how you break a hip.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Okay, I'll do it!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah! Okay! Great! Go, man, go put on your shoes, and, and march out there andmeet her!  Oh, wait, no, no you have to take ashower, 'cause, eww.  No, youknow what you have to answer her, answer her first.  No,no, you know what make some coffee 'cause its too much. 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Okay, one more, please. Come on, I'm gonna get it in this time, I will.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Okay, last chance.  Again, I'm sorry.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 You know what, maybe I don't need to have children. You know maybe I just think Ido because that is what society, and by that I mean my mom, has always convinced me thatI... I do, I have to have children, I'm sorry, Ijust do.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Best Man	  Yo! Can I have your attention, please, Best Man, making a toasthere. Thank you.  I remember when Barry gothome from his first date with Rachel...
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 What?!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Best Man	 What,  you hired the same band I can't use the same speech.  Thank you, thank you very much. Anyway, I wish you botha wonderful life together. And Rachel...
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 What.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Best Man	 No, no, no now in all seriousness, its not a lot of women would've had the gutsto come back here tonight, and even fewer, who would do it with their asses hanging out!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	  Uh, I like to, uh, to add something to that...
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Most of you don't know me, I'm Rachel's boyfriend.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh dear God.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Ross, uh and uh, I'd just like to say that it did take a lot of courage for Rachelto come here tonight. And, uh, for the record she did not run out on Barry because she hadsyphilis.   What are you doing I'm serious. Uh, the reason shewalked out on, on Barry is simply that she didn't love him, which incidentally worked outpretty well for me  Cheers.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	  She you in the parking lot.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	  No, Rach!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Barry	 And once again she is out of here. Okay who had 9:45? Um?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	  Ya,know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promisedmyself that I would make it through at least *one* of your weddings . Seenow, tonight, all I 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Marenge,
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	  "...marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. And while shelike to be a star, Tony always tended bar. At the, wait, wait, everybody.."
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 Everybody!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 At the Copa, Copa Cabana  The hottest spot north of Havana. Atthe Copa, Coo-pa Ca-ban-a, music and fashion were always the passion, at the Copa....
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Okay, I'll do it.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 You'll do what?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 If kids is what I takes to be with you then kids it is.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Oh my God!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 If I have to I'll, I'll do all again , I'll do the 4 o'clock feeding thing, I'llgo to the P.T.A. meetings, I'll coach the soccer team.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Really?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 Yeah, if I have to. Monica, I don't wanna lose you, so if I have to do it allover again, then I will.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 You're the most wonderful man. And if you hadn't of said 'if I have to' likeseventeen times, then I'd be saying 'okay, let's do it.'
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 But you're not.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 Oh my God, I can't believe what I'm getting ready to say. I wanna have a baby, butI don't wanna have one with someone who doesn't really wanna have one.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 God. I love you.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Monica	 I know you do. Me too.  So what now?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Richard	 I guess we just keep dancing.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Where is she, Where is she?  Oh, hey, I have a question, where isshe?
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Rachel	 Chandler, relax, Chandler, she'll be here.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	  Ooh, oh, oh, that's her.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	  Yeah, 'cause life's just that kind.
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Phoebe	 Chandler, you gotta stop staring at the door. It's like a watched pot, you know ifyou keep looking at it then the door is to, never gonna boil. I think what you have to dois try not to...
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Chandler	 Oh my God! 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Janice	 OH.....MY.....GAWD!! 
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	All	 OH.....MY.....GOD!!
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Ross	 All right I've been feeling incredibly guilty about this, because I wanna be a goodfriend, and dammit I am a good friend. So just, just shut up and close your eyes .
02	24	0224	The One With Barry And Mindy's Wedding	Joey	 Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and I didn't getit. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 I'm tellin' ya that girl totally winked at me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	All	 Did not, she did not wink at you....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Huh. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 I have to say Tupolo Honey by Van Morrison.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Nooo Way! The most romantic song ever is The Way We Were.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 See, I-I think that one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Who'sThe Boss.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 What song was that, Pheebs?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	  Hold me close, young Tony Dan-za.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Hi Monica!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Hey Mon!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Hey Mon!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Oh my God, has she slept at all?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Nope.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 No, it's been three nights in a row.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yeah, she finally stopped crying yesterday, but then she found one ofRichard's cigar butts out on the terrace, so.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Oh, okay that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all Icould hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought okay its like a mouse or aopossum. But then I realized where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make thephone call.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Morning.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Morning, hey, you made pancakes?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Yeah, like there's any way I could ever do that.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	  Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my manto cheer up.  Good morning Joey.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	  Good morning.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Hey, you know what, here's a thought. Why don't you stay home fromwork today and just hang out with me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 Oh, I wish. Look, honey, you have that report to finish, and I gotta gosee my lawyer. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 I can not believe that I am going out with someone that is gettingdivorced. I'm such a grown up.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	  I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Okay, not without a kiss.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Well, maybe I won't kiss you, and then you'll have to stay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	  Kiss her! Kiss her!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 I'll see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 B-bye Janice. So when ya' dumpin' her.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Nope, not this time.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Come on, quite yankin' me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 I'm not yanking you.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 This is Janice.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Yeah, I know. She makes me happy.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Okay. All right. You look me in the eye and tell me, without blinking,that you're not breaking up with her. No blinking.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	  I'm not breaking up with her! 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 God, look what I found in the drain.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 What?!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 It's some of Richard's hair!  What do I do withthis?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Getting it away from me would be job one.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 It's weird, but you know what I don't wanna throw this away. I mean thisis like all I have left of him, gross, drain hair. Ooh! 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in yourcereal. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 God, what is wrong with me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 You need to get some sleep.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I need to get some Richard.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Monica, you broke up with him for a reason.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I know, I know. I'm just so tired of-of missing him. I'm tired ofwondering why hasn't he called. Why hasn't he called!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Maybe, because you told him not to.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 What are you the memory woman?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	  Their not breaking up. Chandler and Janice. Their not breakingup. He didn't blink or anything.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Well, you know I'm not surprised. I mean have you seen them together,they're really cute.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Cute! This is Janice! You remember Janice?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Yes, Joey, I remember, she's annoying, but you know what she's-she's hisgirlfriend now. I mean what can we do?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 There you go! That's the spirit I'm looking for! What can we do? Huh? Allright who's first? Huh? Ross?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Well I'm thinking that Chandler's our friend and Janice makes him happy,so I say we just all be adult about it and accept her.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Yeah, we'll call that Plan B. All right?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	  Honey, I was wondering....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Hmm?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Do you still have that, um, Navy uniform?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Nooo, I had to return it to the costume place.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Hmm.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 I think I have an old band uniform from high school.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 You remember not having sex in high school, right?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yeah.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Well honey, what about you?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 What?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 I mean do you have any fun, you know, fantasy type things?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 No.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Come on you gotta have one!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Nope.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Ross, you know what...
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 What?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 ...if you tell me, I might do it.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Okay, umm. Did you ever see, um, Return Of The Jedi?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Do you remember the scene with, um, Jabba the Hut? Well Jabba had as, ashis prisoner, um, Princess Leia. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Oooh!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Princess Leia, was wearing this, um, gold bikini thing. It was prettycool.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Yeah, oh, Princess Leia and the gold bikini, every guy our age lovedthat.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Really!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Um, um. It's huge. Yeah, that's the moment, when-when, you know shestopped being a princess, and became, like, a woman, you know.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Did you ever do the-the Leia thing?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, um-mm. Oh!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Really! That-that great huh?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 No it's just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	  Hey!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Hi you guys!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Look who I found standing outside of the Szechwan Dragon staring at aparking meter.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Mon. Hi! 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Hi.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Why aren't you at work?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Oh, they-they sent me home.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Why?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Because I don't work at the Szechwan Dragon.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 You really, really need to get some sleep, honey.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I know I do.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Hi.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Hi.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Guess what?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 What?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 They published my paper.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Oh, really, let me see, let me see.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Rach, look!  Oh, hi! Where is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. There he is.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Hey!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Wheel!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Of!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Fortune! This guy is so stupid.  It's Count Rushmore!!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I gotthree tickets to the Rangers tonight. What'd ya' say?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 I say, 'I am there!' Cool! Aw, is Ross going to?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 No, Janice.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Jan-ice. 'Cause I, just, I feel bad for Ross, you know, we-we always gotogether, we're like the three hocke-teers.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 You know, I may be way out on a limb here, but do you, do you, have aproblem with Janice?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. . Oh, hi, you know that girl from theGreek restaurant with the hair ?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Ooh, that girl that I hate, eww, drives me crazy, eww, eww, oh!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Look, I don't hate Janice, she's-she's just a lot to take, you know.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Well, there you go.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Oh, hey. Come on man, don't look at me like that, she used to drive younuts before too, remember?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Well, I'm crazy about her now. I think this could be the real thing.Capital 'R'! Capital 'T'!  Don't worry, those are the right letters.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Look, what do you want me to say?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 I want you to say that you like her!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 I can't. It's like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she startslaughing, I just wanna  pull my arm off just so that I can havesomething to throw at her. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Thanks for trying.  Oh, and bythe way there is no Count Rushmore!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Yeah, then-then who's the guy that painted the faces on the mountain?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 How could you have told her? 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Ross, I didn't think it would that big of a deal.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Oh, she didn't think it would be that big of deal.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Okay, who are you talking to when you do that?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Look, that was supposed to be like a private, personal thing between us.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Okay, Ross, Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay, we tell each othereverything. You know, I mean, come on, guys do the same thing, I mean, what about all thatlocker room stuff.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 That's different, okay. That's like, uh 'Who dated a stripper?' or 'Whodid it on the back of the Staton Island Ferry?'.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Were both of those Joey?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yeah. Look, you don't, you don't talk about like, you know, yourgirlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Not even with your best friend.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Noo!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bondingand the sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the samething you are.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Hmph. So what you, you tell each other everything?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Pretty much.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Did you talk about the night of five times? Do you tell people about thenight of five times? 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Uh, honey, yeah that was with Carol.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 I know, but it's still worth mentioning, I think.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	  Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to theplinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell meyour happy place.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Richard's living room, drinking wine.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 All right. No, no, no, not a Richard thing, just put down the glass. Andget out!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I'm sorry, but that's my happy place.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Well, okay, fine, use my happy place. Okay, I'm just gonna, I have toask that you don't move anything.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 All right, I'll try not to.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Okay, all right, so, your in a meadow, millions of stars in the sky....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 All right, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay, just, thewarm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the trees....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I'll bet he's totally over me, I'll bet he's fine.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 All right, betting and wagering of any kind, are, I'm sure, notpermitted in the happy place. Okay. Just-just, you know, the-the lovely waterfalls, andthe, the trickling fountains. And the-the calming sounds of the babbling brook....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Okay, this isn't working. I'm still awake and now I have to pee.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 So, I hear, you hate me!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 I, ah, I never said hate, I was very careful about that.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 A little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm offand throw it at me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 And you got a 'hate' from that?! Your taking a big leap there...
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 All right, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, we've got to do something aboutour little situation here Joey. So, this is my idea: you and me spending some quality timetogether.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 But what does that gonna do...
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 For Chandler!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Okay. I'm in.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 Okay. All right. This is what we're gonna call it: 'Joey and Janice's DAYOF FUN!'
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Does it have to be a whole day?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 Yes, because that's how long it takes to love me.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Yeah, I know, I sleep in the next room.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	  So, I went down to the post office, and it turns out it wasthose videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civil War.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Phoebe	 Monica, do you want us to take you home?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Uh, huh.  Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Women tell each other everything. Did you know that?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Umm, yeah.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique,stamina, girth....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Girth? Why, why, why, wh-why, why, why, why would they do this? 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Rachel says sharing's great and supposedly, you know, we outta be doingit. Do you wanna?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 We're not gonna talk about girth are we?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Nooo!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Yeah, okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yeah?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Yeah! All right! You go first.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Okay, okay, I'll go first.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies,and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thing....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Princess Leia in the gold bikini.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yes! 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 I know!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Yes! Wow, well, that-that was easy. Okay, you-you go.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Okay, you know, you know when your in bed, with a woman.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Hmph.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 And, ah, you know, your fooling around with her. And you get all theselike, mental images in your brain, you know, like Elle MacPherson, or that girl at theXerox place....
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 With the belly-button ring? Oh, muhawa!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 I know, And then all of the sudden your Mom pops into your head. Andyour like 'Mom, get outta here!' You know, but of course, like, after that you can'tpossibly think of anything else, and you can't, you know, stop what your doing. So it'skinda like, you're, you know. You know.... You don't know!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 Your Mom, your telling me, your telling me, about your Mom, what is thematter with you?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 You said...
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 I said 'share' not 'scare'. Go sit over there! .
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 We're baack!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Hey!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 What are you guys doing together?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 Joey and Janice's DAY OF FUN!!! 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Really.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. We went to a Mets game, we got Chinese food, and you know, Ilove this woman. You have got competition buddy.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Janice	 I just came by to give you a kiss, I have to go pick up the baby, so.I'll see you later sweetheart, you too Chandler. 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 You still can't stand her can you?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 I'm sorry man, I tired, I really did.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Well, you know, I appreciate you giving it a shot.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 But, hey, look, you know the good thing is, is that we spent the whole daytogether and I survived, and what's even more amazing, so did she. It was bat day at SheaStadium.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Well, I guess that's something.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 No man, that's huge! Now, I know I can stand to be around her, which meansI get to hang out with you, which is kinda the whole point, anyway.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Oh, hey, Chandler, we, ah, we stopped by the coffee shop and ran intoRoss.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Oh God!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I do it too.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Chandler	 Really?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Joey	 Oh yeah, I always picture your Mom when I'm having sex.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Video	April Twelve, Eighteen hundred, Sixty-One , 4:30 A.M. on Tuesday, the United States garrison at Fort Sumter wasfired upon  it is now under bombardment by.... 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Hi, Dad, what are you doing here?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Well, it's your mother's bridge night so I thought that I would comeinto the city for a little Monicuddle.  Since when did you start smoking cigars?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I don't, I just, I just like the smell of them. So, uh, what are youreally doing here Dad?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Well, I just wanted to make sure you were okay.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 What makes you think that I might not be okay?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 I saw Richard.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Oh.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 So, how are you doing?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I'm fine, just a little tired, I'm okay. How's Richard doing?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 You don't wanna know.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 No, I really, really do.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Well, he's doing terrible!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Really!
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Worse than when he broke up with Barbara.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 You're not just saying that are you?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 No, the man is a mess.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Was he crying?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 No.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 Well, do you think he was waiting 'til after you left, so he could cry?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Maybe.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Monica	 I think so.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mr. Geller	 Honey, relationships are hard. Like with your Mom and me. You knowafter we graduated college we broke up for a while. It seems her Father, your Grandfather,wanted her to travel around Europe, like he did. Of course, he got to do it on Uncle Sam'snickel, because he was also strafing German troop trains at the time. However, 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Rachel	 Okay, here we go. I'm Jabba's prisoner, and you have a really weird lookon your face. What? Honey, what is it? Did I get it wrong? Did I get the hair wrong? What?Did you just picture it differently? What? What?
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 No, no it's, um, it's not you, um, it's um, it's 
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Mrs. Geller	 Well what is it? Come on sweetie, your like, freaking meout here.
03	01	0301	The One With The Princess Leia Fantasy	Ross	 I hate Chandler, the bastard ruined my life. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 All right they got water, orange juice, and what looks like cider. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Taste it.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	  Yep, it's fat. I drankfat!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Yeah, I know, I did that two minutes ago.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	  Hey!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Hey, mister tux!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Why aren't you guys dressed?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 We have a half hour.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, four minutes ago you had a half hour, we have to be out the door attwenty to eight. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Relax Ross, we'll be ready. It only takes us two minutes to get dressed.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Well, you know, I'd feel a whole lot better if you got dressed now.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	  Hey-hey! Oh, look at you, all sexy.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Really.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Ooooh! Wow!! Oh, hi.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Hi.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 How come you didn't come over earlier?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 'Cause, I'm a stupid, stupid man.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Hey, Ross, want some cider?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No.  So, um, let's see your pretty close, huh. Make-up's on,hair's done. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Yeah, I just have to get dressed.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Yay! And that takes what? Just six or seven minutes.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Yeah! Once, I figure out what I'm wearing.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Glass of fat?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 What's a matter Ross? What you're nervous about your speech?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No! Do you wanna hear it?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Am I in it?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Uh, huh. Yeah, right after I thank everyone for giving money to the museum, Ising a song about the wonder that is Joey.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	  Hello.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Hey!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Whoa!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Wow, hello! You look great!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Thank you! I know, though.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You see this, this is a person who is ready to go. Phoebe you, oh, you are mystar.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Ohh, well, you're my lucky penny.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	  All right, I took thequiz, and it turns out, I do put career before men.  Get up.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 What?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 You're in my seat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 How is this your seat?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 'Cause I was sitting there.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 But then you left.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Well, it's not like I went to Spain. I went to the bathroom, you knew Iwas coming back.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 What's the big deal, sit somewhere else.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 The big deal is I was sitting there last, so, that's my seat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Well, actually the last place you were sitting was in there . Soo...
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You guys, you know what, you know what, it doesn't matter, because you bothhave to go get dressed before the big vain in my head pops. So..
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right, Ross, I just have to do one thing, really quickly, it's not abig deal.  GET UP!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  Hi.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	All	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Ooh, Phoebe, you look great!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 All right all ready.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  Ooh, are you gonna do magic?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 That's, that's funny. Change!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Hang on a second I just got in.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Look, I don't care it starts at eight, we can't be late.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 We could not, would not want to wait.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Look, our table is down in front, okay, my boss is gonna be there, everyonewill see if we arrive after it starts.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Has somebody been drinking my fat? 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	  You guys,  does this looklike something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 I don't know, you might be the first one.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Rach, did you check the machine?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Uh, no. Wait, you know what, this is the outfit that makes my calves lookfat. Nevermind.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Well, Joey, I wrote a little song today. It's called: Get Up.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 All right! You can have the chair.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Really!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Oh my, would you look at that! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	  "Hi, it's me, I'm coming over now. Hey, what if I'malready there when your playing this message?"  Is that too spooky?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	  "Hi Rach, are you there? It's me, pick up. Rachel.Rach!"
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	  What?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Nevermind.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Richard	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Is-is-is that message old or new?  Old or new?! Old or new?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 It's old, it's definitely old. Didn't you hear the, the double beep?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 What if it's new? I mean, we agreed not to talk again, unless we hadsomething really important to say. Shouldn't I call him back?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Honey, you did call him back. 'Cause, it's, it's really old.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Yeah, see Mon, listen, listen. When Carol and I broke up, I went through thesame thing. And you know what I did?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Huh?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 I.....got.....dressed. Really, really quickly. Okay, okay.  There wego, there we go.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 You know what, okay, fine. Don't get up, you just sit right there. I justhope, you don't mind, you know, my hand right here.  Op, not touching, can't get mad! Not touching can't get mad! Nottouching can't get mad! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Ah! Oh my God! You r-r-rotten boys!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 I'm so sorry.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 What am I gonna do?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, no, don't, don't, rub it! Don't!  What gets out hummus?! Whatgets out hummus?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Monica, Monica, you know what gets out hummus.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 If it is a new message, what is he calling to say?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Okay, thanks. Yeah, I'll try that.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Maybe he's calling to say your obsessive and crazy.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 So, should I call him back?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	The Guys	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right, fine, you know what, we'll both sit in the chair.  I'm soooo, comfortable.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Me too. In fact, I think I might be a little too comfortable.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, look, we have nineteen minutes. Okay, Chandler, I want you to go andchange! Okay. And then, when you come back, Joey will go change, and he'll have vacatedthe chair. Okay. Okay.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right! Fine! I'm going. But when I get back it's chair sitting, andI'm the guy who's....sitting in a chair! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	  Is this a little too...  Pheebs, whathappened?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Hummus. I got the hummus.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Ooooh! Honey, well we'll find you something. Do you wanna wear my blackjacket? 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 That won't go with this dress though.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No, you're right. Well, we'll find something. Let's just get you out ofthat. Come on.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, no, no, no, no, no, not out of that, not out of clothes.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Monica, can Phoebe borrow your green dress?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 I called him.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	All	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Yes. Well I got his machine and I left a message. But it's okay, it's okay,it's okay, because you know it was like a casual, breezy message. It was breezy! Oh God,what if it wasn't breezy? 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Well, how could it not be breezy, no, 'cause, you're, you're in such abreezy place.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Here, I got it. I'll will play my message for you guys, and you can tell meif it's breezy enough.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Monica, how are you gonna do that?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 I know the code to his answering machine.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, Mon, I really don't think this is the... Okay, you're dialing, you aredialing.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Richard	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Machine	 "You have two new messages."
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Wow, what a cool job.  'You have two new messages.''Please, pass the pie.'
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  "Hi, it's Monica. I'm just checking in 'cause I got thismessage from you and I didn't know if it was old or new or what. So, I'm just checkin'. Solet me know, or don't, whatever. I'm breezy."
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Hey, you can't say you're breezy, that, that totally negates the breezy.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Woman'S Voice	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Now she sounded breezy.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 He's seeing someone. I can't believe he's seeing someone.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Monica, you don't know that.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Well, who's voice was that?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Maybe it was his sister's. You know, maybe it was his daughter's.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Michelle! Of course, it was Michelle! Did it sound like Michelle?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Oh, great. It's starting to rain, that will make it easy to get a cab.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 It was Michelle. It was definitely Michelle.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Pheebs, you go with Monica and try on her green dress. If that doesn'twork, you can wear my gray silk one. Oh, gosh, what am I wearing?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You don't, you don't know what your wearing?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Well, hon-ey. I'm just trying to look nice for your big night.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Yeah, which, which we have to leave for in exactly twelve minutes. All right,come on, I'll just pick something out for you.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right, you will notice that I am fully dressed. I, in turn, havenoticed that you are not. So in the words of A. A. Milne, "Get out of my chair,dillhole!"
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Okay. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 What are you doing?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 You said I had to give you the chair, you didn't say anything about thecushions.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 The cushions are the essence of the chair!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 That's right! I'm taking the essence.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Oh-ho, it'll be back. Oh-ho, there's nobody in the room.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Look, I'm sorry, I thought it looked pretty.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to thisthing as Little Bo Peep.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Look, I didn't recognize it without that inflatable sheep.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Oh Rach, good, listen isn't this perfect for me! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Oh, it's perfect! But not for tonight.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Well, of course not for tonight. Yeah, hi!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Not for tonight. Not for tonight! Wh-what, what, what, are you doing?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No honey, we're sorry, we didn't mean it. I love you. I love you.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 We used them as pillows when we went camping.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 What?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	  The sheep.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Hey, what you do on your own time...
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	  Where's my underwear?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on, come on, what. You took his underwear?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 He took my essence!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, now hold on. Joey, why, why can't you just wear the underwear you'rewearing now?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Because, I'm not wearing any underwear now.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, then why do you have to wear underwear tonight?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 It's a rented tux. Okay. I'm not gonna go commando in another man's fatigues.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Well, then it looks like somebody is gonna have to give back somebody hiscushions.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Okay, you hide my clothes. I'm gonna do the exact opposite to you.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 What are you, what are you gonna show me my clothes?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Hey, opposite, is opposite! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 He's got nothing!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	  Okay,I'm ready.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Rachel, didn't have anything that I liked, so, but she had this Christmasribbon, and I thought, 'All right, fine I'll be political.'
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 What are you supporting?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Duh!! Christmas!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, hey, that's okay with me. Two down and I have exactly twelveminutes.... Wha, my watch stopped. My watch.  Okay, see, the, the dinosaurtail isn't going around any more.  What time is it? It's 7:33, Ihave seven minutes. I have seven minutes!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	  Okay, Pheebs, quick, what shoes should I wear? Theblack or the purple?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Just, just, just pick one!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Okay, okay, okay, the black. But, oh, do you have black, with the littlestrappys?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Yeahh, but, but those really go better with pants. Maybe I should wearpants?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Yeah, pants, what, what an idea. Or better yet, um, how 'bout you go withoutany pants. Look, I don't know what you're trying to do to me, but just get your butt inthere and pick out any shoes that fit your feet, okay. No, no I don't care if they match.I don't care if they make your ankles or your knees or your earlobes look fat. Okay.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 But I...
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, no, no just do it. Go in there and pick something out so we can go.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 All right.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Thank you!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  Okay. I gotta call Michelle. I gotta see if thatwas her voice or not. I'm sorry, I just have to.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 It was, it was her voice.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Monica, I think you've gone over to the bad place.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Michelle	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Okay. That was her right?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Definitely.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 See there you go. Woo! We're out of the woods. Okay, I'll get dressed now.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Yay!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 I'll get it, okay.  Hi, Monica and Rachel's.  Yeah,just a second, can I ask who's calling.  Oh, ew, it's Michelle! Ew! She, shemust have that Caller Id thing. You should get that. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  Uh, Michelle. Yeah, that was me, I-I dialed your number bymistake.  Oh, you're so sweet. Yeah, we were a great couple. I know I really misshim. Well, you know how it is, it's that....
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	  You know what's weird. Donald Duck never wore pants. Butwhenever he's getting out of the shower, he always put a towel around his waist. I mean,what is that about?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  Michelle, I only beeped in so I could hear my message. I meanthat's allowed. Yeah-huh! I mean look, yeah, you know what I would really appreciate it ifyou didn't tell your Dad about. What do you mean, you're not comfortable with this? Comeon we're friends!!  That bitch always hated me. I'm calling her back.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, no, no, no. Tick, tick, tick, tick.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Okay, fine. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 They got a phone in there, right?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Okay, we're on it. We're on it.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Um. I know it says black tie optional, but, um this may be pushing it alittle, um.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I'm not gonna gooo.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You're not going to go.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No, I think I'm gonna catch up on my correspondence.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 How, how, um how can you not be going?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I'm not gonna gooo, so I think that will accomplish the not going.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Um, you know, just out of curiosity...
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Well, ever since I was humiliated and yelled at in front of my friends, I'mjust, I don't know, not in a museum benefitty kind of mood.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Right. Right, okay, okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I yelled.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 It's fine.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, but, your-your mad.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I'm not mad. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I'm just not going.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Your not going.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Right.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay. You know that I-I have to go.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Um, hum.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Right. So is it gonna be like 'I'm abandoning you while your upset.'
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 No, because your not upset.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Right.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 About the yelling.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Right, and the humiliating.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Oh, well of course, the humiliating. So, so wee, we're okay.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Um, hum.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 We're good.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Right.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay. Honey?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Yes, Ross. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 I love you. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	  Get away from that! No!  She's just getting dressed.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Is it wrong that I was totally aroused by that?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Okay, buddy-boy. Here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everything youown.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Oh my God! That is so not the opposite of taking somebody's underwear!! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Look at me! I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes? Maybeif I wasn't going commando...
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Oooo-ooh!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Yeah. Whew, it's hot with all of this stuff on. I ah, I better not do any, Idon't know, lunges. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, okay. Enough, enough with the lunging. No! I'm sick of this. Okay. I'vehad it up to here with you two! Neither you can come to the party!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Jeez, what a baby.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Yeah, Ross, way to ruin it. I was just going to get dressed.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You know what I don't care. The only person I cared about getting dressed, isthe one person that says she's not even gonna go. Look Rach, I'm sorry. Okay. Look, I-Iwa, I was a jerk. I'm sorry I yelled. I want you there, I need you there. Look, what, whatcan I do that can show you how much, how much I want you to be there.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 You could drink the fat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Hi, welcome, to an adult conversation.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No, no, no, now wait, wa, wa, waa-it a minute, wait a minute, wait aminute, wait a minute. That actually, uh, that sounds interesting.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 What?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I think you should drink the fat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Yaaaay!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Okay, okay. If that is what it takes to show you how much you mean to me, andhow much I want you there. Then that's what I'll do.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Oh, wait, let me get you another glass. That's been sitting out.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 I think this will be fine. Okay, vanilla milkshake, just a vanilla milkshake,with chicken bits floating in it. Cheers. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 No, no, no, wait! Okay, okay. Don't! I'll go, I'll go!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 You will?!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 You were really gonna do that, weren't you?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Well, yeah.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 You were gonna drink the fat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Joey	 Let's see what else he'll do!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	  How 'bout instead you, go get changed!  You, give himback his underwear! I'm gonna go get a cab, and I want everyone down stairs in twominutes! Monica! 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Stop it. Stop it!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Ross, went to get a cab so we can all... No, wh-what are you doing! No,Monica, no!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Richard	
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Machine	 You have three new messages.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Not any more!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Machine	 Message erased. To record a message begin speaking at the tone.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Hi, uh, Richard it's Monica, um, listen I did something kind of crazytonight, um, maybe I'm getting my period or something, I don't know. Um, anyway, I, I, Ibeeped into your machine and I heard a message that, that freaked me out, and um, you knowwhat Michelle will tell you the rest. I, I, um, I'm sorry, okay, I, I hope that we canforget the whole thing. Okay, bye.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Machine	 Your outgoing message has now been changed.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Outgoing! Did that say outgoing?! Not, outgoing!!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	  "Hi, uh, Richard it's Monica, um, listen I did somethingkind of crazy tonight, um, maybe I'm getting my period or something, I don't know."Nooo!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 How did you do that?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 I don't know!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Machine	 Good-bye.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Noooo!!!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	  Okay, okay, okay, I've got two cabs and no people. Go! Go! Go!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Monica	 Maybe we could call the phone company. Maybe they could change the message.Maybe they can change his number. 
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Phoebe	 Yeah, after this, I think he'll be doing that himself.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Rachel!!  Wow! You, uh, you look, wow!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 And I still have about five seconds to spare.  Okay, that wasabout seven seconds.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 So we're a little late.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 Come on.  Oh! And, uh, by the way....
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 What?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Rachel	 I'm going commando, too.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Awwww!!!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Sherman Whitfield	 Dr. Geller, Sherman Whitfield, London Institute.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Ross	 Wow! What a pleasure.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Whitfield	  Well, I have to tell you, I was quite impressed with yourpaper on Pre-Cretaceous fossils. Yeah, it confirmed everything that I have written.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Excuse me. Hi.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Whitfield	 Yes?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 Well, your kind of sitting in my seat.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Whitfield	 What do you mean, your seat?
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 I mean, I was sitting there.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Whitfield	 But, you got up!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 But, I never left the room!
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Whitfield	 But, you left the chair area.
03	02	0302	The One Where No One's Ready	Chandler	 All right, that's it, give me your underwear.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	  WHOAA!!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	  See Joe, that's why your parents told you notto jump on the bed.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Hey, look at me. I'm making jam, been at it since 4 o'clock thismorning.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Where'd you get fruit at four in the morning?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Went down to the docks. Bet ya didn't know you could get it wholesale.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 I didn't know there were docks.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Aww, is it broken?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 No, I gotta wear this thing for a couple weeks. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Nooo. I had a story all worked out but then Chandler sold me out.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Well, I'm sorry Joe. I didn't think the doctor was gonna buy that itjust *fell* out of the socket.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 What is this? Fruit?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Monica's making jam.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Whoa, jam! I love jam!  Hey, how come we never have jam atour place?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Because the kids need new shoes.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I'm going into business people. I'm sick and tired of being depressedabout Richard. I needed a plan, a plan to get over my man. What's the opposite of man?Jam.  Oh Joey don't! It's way to hot. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 This will just be my batch.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	  Um, that's it. No. Hey! You! J. Crew guy. Yeah. Why haveyou been following me? I mean, all week long everywhere I look there's you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 You wouldn't return my calls, you sent back my letters....
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 What?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 One more chance Ursula, please?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oooh. Oh, well this is awkward. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Wh..
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Um, yeah, you want Ursula, and I'm Phoebe. Twin sisters! Seriously.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Oh, that's great. I'm stalking the wrong woman. I am such a dingus!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, you're not a dingus.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 I just, I want you to know I didn't used to be like this. Before I meetyour sister I was like this normal guy who sold beepers and cellular phones.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Well, I mean look it's, it's not your fault, you know. I mean this isjust what, what she does to guys, okay.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Well thanks. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Wait,  you know what, I got a little story. When I was inJunior High School I went through this period where I thought I was a witch. And there wasthis guidance counselor who said something to me, that I think will help you a lot. Hesaid okay, 'you're not a witch you're just an average student.' See what I'm saying?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Not really.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Um, well, get over it. So, I mean you, you just seem to be a really niceguy, you know. Don't be so hard on yourself okay.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Wait. You're right. I know you're right. And, thanks for being so nice.Here 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, thanks a lot. Do you want to get a cup of coffee?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Yeah, okay.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Okay.  Okay, you don'thave to walk behind me any more.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Guy	 Sorry.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Mon?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Mon?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	  'Gone for more jars. Back later. Monica Geller.'
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Wait a minute, look.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 What?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Look, look, look.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 What, what, what?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 It's an empty apartment.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Oooh.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 We're all alone in an empty apartment.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes  Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 There it is.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Oh, oh, that's what you're talking about.  Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Do I look fat?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross, Rachel	 Noo.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, I accept that. When Janice asked me and I said no, she took thatto mean that I was calling her a cow. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Okay, walk us through it, honey, walk us through it.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, well. Janice said 'Hi, do I look fat today?' And I, I looked ather....
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, whoa. You looked at her. You never look. You just answer, it'sjust a reflex. Do I look fat? Nooo! Is she prettier than I am? Noo! Does size matter?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Nooo!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 And it works both ways.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, so you both just know this stuff?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Well you know, after about thirty or forty fights, you kinda catch on.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Okay, for instance. Let's say, Janice is coming back from a trip and shegives you two options. Option number 1 she'll take a cab home from the airport. Option 2is you can meet her at baggage claim. Which do you do?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 That's easy, baggage claim.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	  Wrong! Now you're single. It's actually secret option numberthree, you meet her at the gate. That way she knows you love her.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, this is good, this is good. All right listen, I have one. Janicelikes to cuddle, at night, which, you know I'm all for. But, uh, you know when you want togo to sleep, you want some space. So, uh, how do I tell her that without, you know,accidentally calling her fat or something.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Oh honey, I'm sorry we can't help you there, 'cause we're cuddlilysleepers.  Okay, I'm late for work.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Oh.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 All right are you guys gonna come down?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Uh, yeah, yeah I'll, I'm right behind you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Good luck Chandler.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Thank you Rachel.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Bye sweetie.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Bye hon.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	  Okay the sleeping thing. Very tricky business, butthere is something you can do.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Well, I thought you guys were cuddlily sleepers.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Noo! No, not cuddlily, not me, just her. I'm like you, I need the room.Okay, come here.  Okay, you're in bed...
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Yeah. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 I'm gonna use the cushion.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Yeah.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Okay, you're in bed. She's over on your side, cuddling. Now you wait forher to drift off, and then you hug her  and roll her backover to her side of the bed. And then you rollll a-way. Hug for her! Roll for you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, the old hug and roll.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Yep.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Okay, one question.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Shoot.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 You're pretending the pillow's a girl right?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Remember when you where a kid and your Mom would drop you off at themovies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	  You're so pretty.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	  Hi!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	All	 Hey, Phoebe.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Hey, oh, you know that guy who's been following me? I talked to himtoday.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	  You talked to him. Are you crazy?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Okay, first I'm not crazy. And second, say it don't spray it. Anyway hisname is Malcom, and he wasn't following me, I mean he was, but 'cause he thought I wasUrsula, ick. And, that's why, that's why he couldn't just come up and talk to me. 'Causeof the restraining order.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Umm, not feeling better 'bout Malcom.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Ooh! No, no, no, no, he's not like a kook, no. He's just like this, thisvery passionate, incredibly romantic guy, that got like a tinsy bit carried away, youknow. And we just get along really well, and he's so cute.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Oh my God, you've got a crush on your sister's stalker.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 No, I'm just gonna help him, you know, get 'de-Ursula-ized', like youknow, like I did for Joey after he went out with her.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	  Hey, I didn't stalk her. I mean  
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Okay, I asked for the news, not the weather.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	  Hey guys.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	All	 Hey Mon.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Joey, this is for you.  It's blackberry curin.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Aww.  Ohh!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Hey, Joe, I gotta ask. The girl from the Xerox place buck naked , or, or a big tub of jam. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Put your hands together.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Joey, take your time with that. That's my last batch.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 No more jam?!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Well, what happened to your jam plan?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I figured out I need to charge seventeen bucks a jar just to break even.So, I've got a new plan now. Babies.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Well, your gonna need much bigger jars.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 What are you talking about?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I'm talking about me having a baby.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 What?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Are you serious?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Yeah. The great thing about the jam plan was, I was taking control of mylife. So I asked myself, what is the most important thing to me in the world and that'swhen I came up with the baby plan. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Well, aren't you forgetin' something? What, what, what is uh, what is thatguy's name? Dad!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 It took me 28 years to find one man that I wanna spend my life with, ifI have to wait another 28 years then, I'll be 56 before I can have a baby, and that's juststupid.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 That, that's what's stupid.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I don't need an actual man, just a couple of his best swimmers. Andthere, there are places you can go to get that stuff.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Down at the docks again?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Janice	 Night-night Bing-a-ling.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Night-night.....Janice.  'Look atall that room on her side, you good fit a giant penguin over there. That would be weirdthough. Okay, hug and roll time. I'm huggin', I'm huggin', your rollin', and....yes!Freedom!  Except for this arm! I'm stuck. Stuck arm! Okay,time for the old table cloth trick, one fluid motion. Quick like a cat, quick like a cat!And 1...2...3!' 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 Here's my binoculars.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, great. Great. You're doing great, you know real strong. Goingstrong. Keep going.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 These are my night vision goggles. This is the book I pretend to readwhen I'm watching her in the park. And these are Mad Lips, they're just for fun.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah. What's this? 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 Oh, this is log I kept, recording her every movement. Do you wanna heresomething from it?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Um, not even a little bit.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 It's about you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, okay then.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	  I met Phoebe today. She was really nice to me eventhough I'msuch a loser. And, then when I was walking home I thought about her a lot, it was weird,but kinda cool.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Good. So what were you thinking?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 I was thinking what it would be like to kiss you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Really?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 No.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 See that's just something I said now, so that maybe I could kiss you.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 No, that's all right. I just had a jar of mustard.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	  Okay, sperm donor number 03815, come ondown! Okay, he's 6'2", 170 pounds, and he describes himself as a male Geena Davis.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 You mean there's more than one of us.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Look, you can't do this Mon. All right, if you do this, I'm, I'm gonna,I'm, I'm gonna.....
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 You're gonna what?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 I'm gonna tell Mom.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Honey, I'm sorry, but he's right. I love you, but you're crazy.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Crazy.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 What?! Why? Why is this crazy? So this isn't the ideal way tosomething....
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	  Oh, it's not the ideal way...
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Lips moving, still talking. I mean it may not be ideal, but I'm soready. No, I-I-I see the way Ben looks at you. It makes me ache, you know?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Check it out!! Jam crackers!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Okay, all right, how's this? 27. Italian-American guy. He's an actor,born in Queens. Wow, big family, seven sisters, and he's the only....boy.  Oh my God, under personal comments: 'New York Knicks, rule!'
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Yeah, the Knicks rule!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Joey, this is you!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Let me see.  Oh, right.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 When did you go to a sperm bank?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Well, right after I did that sex study down at NYU.  Hey,Remember that sweater I gave you for your birthday?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 And that's how you bought it?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Noooo, that's what I was wearing when I donated. I'm kinda surprisedthere's any of my boys left.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Well, honey, it is pretty competitive. I mean I've got an actual rocketscientist here.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Maybe, I should call this place and get them to put my 'Days of Our Lives'on here. You know, juice this puppy up a little.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	  Hellooo!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	All	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 How's the maniac?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, well he's yummy. We did a little kissin'.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Phoebe, what are you doing?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, no, no, no, no. You know what, he's not into that stuff anymore. Hequit for me.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Pheebs, this guy has been obsessed with your sister, for God knows howlong, okay, you don't just give up something like that.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Look, he gave me his night vision goggles and everything.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 You're taking the word of a guy who has night vision goggles?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 What, he's not still following her. Do you think he is still followingher?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Pheebs, wake up and smell the restraining order.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 What are you saying I should do?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I think, that if you really like this guy, you should just trust him.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Thank you, Monica.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Orrr, you could follow him and see where he goes.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Oh, that's what I would do, forget mine.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Oh my God, what happened? 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Janice	 Oh. God, crazy Chandler. He spun me...off...the...bed!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Wow! Spinning that sounds like fun.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Janice	 Oh,  I wish. No, you know he was just trying Ross's Hug and Rollthing. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	  Ross's what?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Janice	 You know what, where he hugs you and kinda rolls you away and... Oh...my....God.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 Phoebe?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Yes? Yes! Oh.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 What are you doing?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh, I was just here looking for, um, my um, my part of an old sandwich.Oh, here it is! Oh. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 Were you following me?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Um, perhaps. Yes! Yes, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I was just afraid that youwere still hung up on my sister.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 So you spied on me. I can't believe you don't trust me. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Oh well, what do you know, there goes my identical twin sister. Justwalkin' along looking like me. What, is this just like a freakish coincidence, or did youknow she takes this train?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I tried to stop, but I couldn't. I'm so pathetic.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 No, no, it's not your fault. You know it's partly my fault, 'cause Imade you quit cold turkey. Sorry, no. Okay, well, I mean, I can't date you anymore, 'causeyour, you know  Wow! But um, but I will definitely, definitelyhelp you get over my sister. Okay, stalk me for a while. Huh? Yeah, and, and, and, I'll belike an Ursula patch.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Malcom	 Uh-huh, I don't know.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Phoebe	 Yeah, just, okay, look I'm going. Um, come on. Op, op, behind thepillar, which way am I gonna go? 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Hey.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Where you going?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 To the bank.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Sperm or regular?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Sperm.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 So you're really doing this, huh?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Oh yeah, picked a guy, 37135. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Sounds nice.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 'Fraid so. Brown hair, green eyes...
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 No kiddin', hmm. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 What?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 No, I-I figured you would've picked a blond guy.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Really? Why?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 I don't know, I just always pictured you ending up with one of those tall,smart blond guys, name like.... Hoyt.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Hoyt?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 It's a name, yeah. I saw you, you know, in this great house with a bigpool.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Really, is he a swimmer?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 He's got the body for it.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 I like that.  What?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 You guys have one of those signs that says: 'We don't swim in your toilet,so don't pee in our pool.', you know.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 We do not have one of those signs.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Sure you do, it was a gift from me. Oh! And you have these three greatkids.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Two girls and a boy?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Yeah!
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 And, and, and they wear those little water wings, you know. And they're,they're running around on the deck. Then Hoyt wraps this big towel around all three ofthem.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Sure!  But hey, you know this way sounds goodtoo. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Monica	 Yeah.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 Oh Monica.  Wow, this guy's an astronaut. That would've been cool,  forlike a day. .
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	 I called the sperm bank today, they haven't sold a single unit ofTribianni. Nobody wants my product. I mean, I-I-I don't get it  Maybe ifthey met me in person.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Honey, you got a little thing on your...
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Joey	  Did I get it?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	  Hello. 
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Rachel	 Hello.
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	  Hey.  Uh, Chan, can I uh, can Italk to you for a second?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Chandler	 Sure. What's up?
03	03	0303	The One With The Jam	Ross	 Just one uh, one additional relationship thought. Probably something youralready familiar with, uh, women talk! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Host	 Welcome everybody, welcome to Amazing Discoveries!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh, oh! It's on again!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 You guys, can we please not watch this all right.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	All	 Shhhh!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Host	 Folks, has this ever happened to you. You go to the refrigerator to geta nice glass of milk,  andthese darn cartons are so flingin'-flangin' hard to open.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	  Oh, you said it Mike.  Aw! There's got to be a better way!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Mike	 And there is Kevin.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Can we please turn this off?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Noo way, Kevin.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Mike	 There is a revolutionary new product that guarantees that you'll neverhave to open up milk cartons again. Meet the Milk Master 2000.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	  Are you intrigued?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 You're flingin'-flangin' right I am!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Mike	 Keep in mind, he's never used this product before, you're gonna see howeasy this is to do.  Go ahead.  This workswith any milk carton.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	  Wow, it is easy. Now, I can have milk everyday.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Well, it's official there are no good movies.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Well, let's go to a bad one and make out. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Perhaps, you would like me to turn like this,  so that you can bunny bump against my back.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	  Hey!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Hey.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Hey, man. What's up?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Maybe you can tell me. My agent would like to know why I didn't show up atthe audition I didn't know I had today. The first good thing she gets me in weeks. Howcould you not give me the message?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Well, I'll tell ya I do enjoy guilt, but, ah, it wasn't me.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yes, it was! It was him! Uh huh!  Okay, it wasme! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 How is it you?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Well, it was just, it was all so crazy, you know. I mean, Chandler wasin the closet, counting to 10, and he was up to 7 and I hadn't found a place to hide yet.I-I-I meant to tell you, and I wrote it all down on my hand. See, all of it. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Yep, that's my audition.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 See, now this is why I keep notepads everywhere.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yep, and that's why we don't invite you to play.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 What is the great tragedy here? You go get yourself another appointment.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Well, Estelle tried, you know. The casting director told her that I missedmy chance.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 That is unfair. I'll call her and tell her it was totally my fault.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Pheebs, you can't do that. The casting director doesn't talk to friends,she only talks to agents.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 What a sad little life she must lead. Okay, ooh . 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 What, what are you doing? What are you doing?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 No, no, no, I know, I know, ooh. 'Hi, this is Katelynn, from Phoebe Buffay's office. Um, is um, Ann there for Phoebe,she'll know what it's about.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Hang up, hang up. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  'Annie! Hi. Listen we got a problem with Joey Tribbiani,apparently he missed his audition. Who did you speak to in my office? Estelle, no, I don'tknow what I'm going to do with her. No. All right, so your husband leaves and burns downthe apartment, the world does not stop.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Is anybody else scared?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  'Right, well look, um, if Joey loses this audition, that isit for Estelle. I don't care! Annie you are a doll, what time can you see him?'  I need a pen. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Get the woman a pad! Get the woman a pad! A pad! A pad!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Oh, now you want a pad.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Carol, Susan	  Hey!!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 There's my boy! Here's my boy! And here's his Barbi  What's ah, what's my boy doing with a Barbi?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Carol	 He picked it out of the toy store himself, he loves it.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Susan	 He carries it everywhere, it's like a security blanket, but with skiboots and a kicky beret.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Yeah, it's, it's, it's cute. Why, why, why does he have it, again?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Susan	 So he's got a doll? So what? Unless you're afraid he's gonna grow up andbe in show business.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Carol	 This doesn't have anything to do with the fact that he is being raised bytwo women, does it?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 You know what it's fine. If you're okay with the Barbi thing, soam I.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Give daddy the Barbi! Ben, give, give me the Barbi.Okay, how 'bout, don't you want to play with the monster truck?  No. Okay, oh, oh, how about a Dino-soilder? 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Ross, you are so pathetic. Why can't your son just play with his doll?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	  I gotta go to work. Has anybody seen my leftboob?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 I love that movie. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 There it is. Joey, what are you doing?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 I'm sorry, it just felt nice.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  Joe. Joe! Answer the phone.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Hey, I only got one good arm, you know. You should be doing stuff for me.Go get me a sweater.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Just do it! Okay, it's Janice and if I get it I'm going to have to seeher tonight.  Oh, that's great I'm gonna have to see her tonight.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 What's the big deal? Why don't you wanna see Janice?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Okay, last night at dinner, when the meals came, she put half herchicken piccata on my plate and took my tomatoes.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 And that's bad because..., you hate chicken piccata?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Noo.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 You didn't want to share your tomatoes, tomatoes are very important toyou.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 No, it's like all of the sudden, we were this couple. And this alarmstarted going off in my head: 'Run for your life! Get out of the building!'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Men are unbelievable.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 What is it with you people! I mean, the minute you start to feelsomething, you have to run away?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 I know, that,  that's why I don't want to go tonight, I'm afraid I'm going to saysomething stupid.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Oh, you mean like that guy thing where you act mean and distant untilyou get us to break up with you.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Hey, you know about that?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Look what do I do? I wanna get past this, I don't wanna be afraid ofthe commitment thing. I wanna go through the tunnel, to the other side! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	  Where there is no fear of commitment.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Do we have any... Do wehave any thoughts here?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Well, I've never been through the tunnel myself, 'cause as I understandit, you're not allowed to go through with more than one girl in the car, right. But, itseems to me it's pretty much like anything else, you know, face your fear. It have a fearof heights, you go to the top of the building! If you're afraid of bugs.....get a bug.Right. In this case, you have a fear of commitment, so I say you go in there and be themost committed guy there ever was.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Amazingly, that makes sense.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 You think?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Oh, yeah. Go for it man, jump off the high dive, stare down the barrel ofthe gun, pee into the wind!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Yeah, Joe, I assure you if I'm staring down the barrel of a gun, I'mpretty much peeing every which way.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh, it's your audition from this morning. Can I use the phone again?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Sure Pheebs, you know, that's what it's there for, emergencies andpretend agents.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Come on baby, come on!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  'Hi, I have Phoebe Buffay returning apage. Okay, well, um, she's in her car I'll have to patch you through.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Very nice touch.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  'Okay, go ahead.'  Um, hiAnnie.  Fantastic!  You got it.  Oh, okay, um, 'Will he workfor scale?' you ask me. Well, I don't know about that,  except that I do and he will. Great, oh you are such a sweetheart. I would love tohave lunch with you, how about we have lunch next.... Op, went through atunnel.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Unbelievable.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Thank you so much.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 It was really fun, I mean I've never talked on a car phone before.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 You were amazing, could you just do me this huge favor, you see there'sthis one other audition that I really, really want, and Estelle couldn't get me in.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't know. I mean it was fun one time.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Come on, please, it'll be just this one more, well actually it's two.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Two?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Yeah! Well, well really it's three. Please. You're so good at it. I loveyou.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Okay, I'll do it, but just these three, right
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Nooo, four.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 So, how come you wanted to eat in tonight?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 'Cause, I wanted to uh, give you this. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Ohhh, are you a puppy!  Contact paper! I never really knowwhat to say when someone you're sleeping with gives you contact paper.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Well, wait there's, there's more. See the contact paper is to go intoyour brand new drawer.  See, the drawer actually goes in my dresser.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Oh, you didn't have to do this.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Yes, I did. Yes, I did. Because, you're my girlfriend, and that's whatgirlfriends should, should get. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Well, I gotta buy a vowel. Because, oh my Gawd! Who, would've thoughtthat someday, Chandler Bing would buy me a drawer.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Well, not me. But that's what's happened, and, ah, and, and there'smore. We should take a trip.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 We should?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Yep, we're a couple and that's what couples do. And, I wanna meet yourparents. We should take a trip with your parents!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	  I don't think we need to, because you're tripping me out rightnow! Are you okay?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 I am, I actually am. I mean this is amazing. My entire life I havefeared this place, and now that I'm here it's like what was the big deal. I could probablysay 'Let's move in together.' and I'd be okay.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 You probably want us to move in together?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 It doesn't scare me!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Yeah, well, it scares me! I mean I not even divorced yet, Chandler. Youknow, you just invited me over here for pasta, and all of the sudden you're talking aboutmoving in together. And, and I wasn't even that hungry. You know what, it's getting alittle late, and I-I should just, um...
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Oh, no, no, no, don't go! I've scared ya'! I've said too much! I'mhopeless, and awkward, and desperate for love!!  Hey, Janice! It's me. Um, yeah, I-I-I just wannaapologize in advance for having chased you down the street. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Honey, this will help. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 So, I finally catch up to her and she says this relationship is goingto fast and we have to slow down.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel, Monica	 Uff.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 That is never good.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Then I got all needy and clingy.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. Maybe it's not sobad. How did you leave it?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 She said she'd call me.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel, Monica	 Ohh! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Oh God.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Welcome to our side of the tunnel.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 This ice cream tastes like crap by the way.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Yeah, well that's that lo-cal, non dairy, soy milk junk. We sort of, wesave the real stuff for those really terminal cases.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 You know, when you start get screwed over all the time, you gotta switchto low-fat.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Yeah, you do.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 So, you don't think I'm terminal?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Well, no, not at all, you're not terminal, you just, you just need somedamage control.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Okay, okay. So, should I call her?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel, Monica	 Nooo!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reachingfor that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. You wanther back you have to start acting aloof.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 She has to know that your not ready.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Right. So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into heron purpose. And then act aloof.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 So I'm not, not gonna lose her?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Oooh, honey, you're not a total loser.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 I said, 'So I'm not gonna lose her?'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Oh.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Guess who's here. It's the toughest guy in toy land, Ben.  'Areal American hero. I'm G.I. Joe!' Drop the Barbi, drop the Barbi.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 G.I. Joe? Do you really think he's gonna fall for that?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	  G. I. Joe! Cool! Can I play?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Look Ben, it's a toy that protects U.S. oil interests overseas!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey, Ross	 Go Joe!!!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  Helloo! Oh! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Pheebs! There you are!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 No it's not, sorry.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 But Phoebe, wait! Wait! Phoebe. Phoebe! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh, Joey! Oh, okay, see I didn't recognize you wearing, inthose....pants.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Look listen, that TV movie I went in for? Did you hear anything? I think Igot a shot at it.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yes! They called and you didn't get it! Okay, I mean you didn't get it,I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 It's okay, these things happen.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 But they shouldn't happen, you know what, you're, you're in a terrible,terrible business. Oh God, I don't wanna be the person who makes your face look like that.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 I'm, I'm okay. See. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh, now you're sad and creepy, oh. You know what, I, I'm sorry I quit,okay, I just quit.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 No! No, no you can't quit! You're the best agent I ever had! Look Pheebs,rejection is part being an actor, you can't take it personally.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Not personal, really, well they said that they never met an Italianactor with a worse Italian accent.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 They actually said that?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yeah. Ooh God, there's that face again! See I can't do this job! I...
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 No, no, no, see that's why you have to do this job, agents always lie. Youknow, Estelle just says stuff like 'They went another way', but this, I can use this.  I canna work on a new accent.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yeah okay, no if it helps you okay. Yeah.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	  You'll never get me, Joe!!! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	  No, thank you. Chandler!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  Hello, Janice.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 What are you doing here?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  Oh, just a bit of shopping. How've you been?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Are you being British?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  No. Not anymore.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Why are you shopping here? You don't live in this neighborhood. Were youhere waiting for me?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Yeah, huh. I'm just uh, you know I'm just picking up some things for aparty. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Barley? What kind of party serves barley?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Well, I'm sorry if my friends aren't as sophisticated as yours.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Where is this party?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Here in Chelsea.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Who's party is it?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 A woman's
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 What woman?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  Chelsea.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Janice	 Okay, you know, one of two things is happening here. Either you'reseeing somebody behind my back, which would make you the biggest jerk on the planet. Or,else you're pretending that you're seeing somebody, which just makes you so pathetic thatI could start crying right here in the cereal aisle. So like which of these two guys doyou want to be? 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Can I be that guy?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Okay, so we got some more good rejections, lots of stuff to work on. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Okay, shoot.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Okay, um, oh, the zoo commercial.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 I didn't get it?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 No. They said you 'Weren't believable as a human being.' So, you canwork on that. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Okay, what else?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Um, the off-Broadway play people said 'You were pretty but dumb.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Oh.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh no wait, I'm sorry, that's 'pretty dumb.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Look, it's okay, no, no, no, really, look um, I really appreciate thisPheebs, but I think I'm gonna have to go back to Estelle.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Yeah, well don't get me wrong, you're a better agent than she is, but atleast with her I don't want to blow my pretty dumb brains out.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yeah, no, I understand.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 You do, thanks.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 Yeah. Sorry. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Wait a minute.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	 What?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	 Wait a minute, did you just make up all that stuff just to get out ofbeing my agent.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Phoebe	  Oh, you caught me. I am so busted.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Joey	  That's-ah what I suspected-ah.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 ....And then I just, you know, threw the bag of barley at her, and ranout of the store.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 My God! Chandler, we said be 'aloof' not 'a doof'.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 I've actually ruined this haven't I? It's time for the good ice creamnow, right?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Yeah, it is.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 You know what, everything's gonna be okay. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  Hello. Hi, Janice! Can you hold on for a second?Okay.  Okay, what do I do?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Shhh...I don't know what to do, this is totally unprecedented.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 If-if-if we ever did what you did a man would never call.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 Hello!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Oh wait, you know what, I got it, I got it, pretend like you just wokeup, okay, that will throw her off. Be sleepy.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 Yes, and grumpy.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	 What are you, stop naming dwarves!  Hello, Janice. Hi, I'mso glad that you called, I know I've been acting a really weird lately. And, it's justbecause I'm crazy about you, and I just got...stupid, and, and scared, and....stupid acouple of more times. I'm sorry.  Really?!  Really?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Rachel	 He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebodyelse by now.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Chandler	  I love you too.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Aw, it's soo unfair. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Carol	 G. I. Joe. G. I. Joe?!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Hey, I don't know what to tell you guys that's the doll he chose.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Susan	 What'd you do, dip it in sugar?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Look, G. I. Joe's in, Barbi's out. And if you guys can'tdeal with it, that's your 'too bad.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 What are you being such a weenie for? So he has a Barbi, big deal. Youused to dress up like a woman.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 What?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Well, you used to dress up in Mom's clothes all the time.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 What are you talking about?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 The big hat, the pearls, the little pick handbag.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Okay, you are totally making this up.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 How can you not remember? You made us call you...Bea. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	  Oh God.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Susan	 I've literally never been this happy.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 Wasn't there a little song?
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Carol	 Oh please God, let there be a song.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 There was no song.  There was no song!
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	  'I am Bea.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Okay.
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 'I drink tea.'
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	 Okay, that's, that's enough. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 '....Won't you, won't you, won't you.... '
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Ross	  Won't you dance around with me. 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Monica	 A-ha!!! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Young Ross	  'I am Bea. I drink tea. Won't you dancearound with....'  Ohhh! 
03	04	0304	The One With The Metaphorical Tunnel	Young Monica	  Ross!!! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	  Hey!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Hey!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Hey-hey-hey. So what happened? A forest tick you off?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 No. Y'know how were always saying we need a place for the mail.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yeah!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Well, I started building one. But then I decided to take it to the nextstep.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Youre building a post office?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 No, an entertainment unit, with a mail cubby built right in. Its aone day job, max.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Okay.  My word!Those are snug.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Oh yeah. These are my old work pants, Sergio Valentes.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Power saw kinda got away from me there.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	  Hey Pheebs. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Hey!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Any sign of your brother?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 No, but hes always late.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 I thought you only met him once?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah, I did. I think it sounds y'know big sistery, y'know,Franks always late.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Well relax, hell be here.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 No, I know, Im just nervous. Y'know its just y'knowMoms dead, dont talk to my sister, Grandmas been sleeping a lot lately.Its like the last desperate chance to have a family, y'know, kinda thing.Youre so sweet to wait with me.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Well, actually Gunther sent me. Youre not allowed to have cups outhere, its a thing. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Does anyone else think David Copperfield is cute?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 No, but he told me, he thinks your a fox.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 All right, Janice, likes him. In fact she likes him so much she puthim on her freebie list.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Her what?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Well, we have a deal, where we each get to pick five celebrities thatwe can sleep with, and the other one cant get mad.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Ah, the heart of every healthy relationship. Honesty, respect, and sexwith celebrities.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 So, Chandler, whos on your list?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Ah, Kim Basinger, Cindy Crawford, Halle Berry, Yasmine Bleeth, and ah,Jessica Rabbit.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Now, you do realize that shes a cartoon, and way out of yourleague?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 I know, I know, I just always wondered if I could get her eyes to popout of her head.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Hey, Monica, who would yours be?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 First, I need a boyfriend, then I can have a list.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Its just a game Mon.  Rach, how about you?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Oh, I dont know, I guess, Chris ODonnel, John F. Kennedy,Jr., Daniel Day Lewis, Sting, and Parker Stevenson.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Spiderman?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Hardy Boy.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Peter Parker.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Thank you.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 What about you honey, who would be on your list?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Well I-I-I, that kind of thing requires some serious thought. First,Ill divide my perspective canidates into catergories....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	  What a geek!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	  Everbody this is Frank! This is my half-brother Frank.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	All	 Oh, hi.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 This is everybody. This is Ross.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 How are you?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Hey.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Chandler.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Hi.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Hi.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Joey.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Hey-hey!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Hey.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 This is Monica.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Whoa!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 And this is Rachel.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Hi!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Whoa!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Im gonna get coffee.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Hey, how do you guys get anything done?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 We dont, really.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Well, so, now, do you guys have a lot of big plans?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Oh yeah! Yeah, no, were gonna connect, y'know bond, andeverything.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Yeah, I was thinking that maybe we could go down to Time Square and pickup some ninja stars. And, oh, um, my friend Larry, he wants me to take a picture of ahooker.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 You know, we dont really take advantage of living in the city.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 I know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Oh, Im sorry. Did I get ya?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 No, you didnt get me!! Its an electric drill, you getme, you kill me!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Calm down, do you want this unit or not?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 I do NOT want this unit!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Well, you shouldve told me that before, Im not a mind reader.Hey, were out of beer. Im going to Monicas.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Fine! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Hey! Where ya headin in those pants? 1982?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Oh Monica, listen, I ah, I saw down at the hardware store, they got thosedesigner tiles on sale. If you ever want to redo the bathroom floor.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Why, whats wrong with my bathroom floor?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Nothing. Its just old and dingy, thats all.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 I highly doubt that. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Oh yeah. If you ah, move your hamper, you see what color the tile used tobe.  Yeah.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 I cant live like this! What are we gonna do? What are we gonna do?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Relax. Here hold this . This old stuff just comesright off. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Thats a little more than I wanted to see.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	  Aw! Look at that, every inch ofthis stuff is glued down. Itd take forever to pry this up. You should ah, you shouldjust leave it. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 I cant leave it! You gouged a hole in my dingy floor.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Eh! There you go.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 You know thats nice, y'know we could put it back there after thesurgeons remove it from your colon!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	  Oh, ew!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 What?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah I know what I wanted to ask you. Um, can you roll your tongue?Because I can, and my Mom couldnt, and I thought y'know, I figured that wassomething I got from our Dad.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 What, wait, you mean like this? 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah. You can do it to. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Your not doing it.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Oh right, yeah okay, my Mom could, and I cant. We dont havethat....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Whens your birthday?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Feburary 16th.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 I know a guy whos the 18th.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Wow, thats close. Whens yours?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 October 25th.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Thats the same month as Halloween. So, um, what kindathings do you like to do at home?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Melt stuff.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Okay, Ive got three of my five.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Three of your five, what?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Celebrities Im allowed to sleep with.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Oh my God! You are giving this a lot of thought.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Yeah, its hard okay, I only have two spots left.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 All right, so who do you got it narrowed down to?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Okay, Elizabeth Hurely....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Oooh-hoo, very attractive, forgiving.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Susan Sarandon.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Eh, y'know what, shes to political, she probably wouldntlet you do it, unless you donated four cans of food first.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 And!! Isabella Rosselini.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Ooh-hoo. Very hot, very sexy. But ah, y'know shes toointernational, y'know shes never gonna be around.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 So?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 So, you gotta play the odds, pick somebody whos gonna be in thecountry like all the time.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Yeah, cause thats why you wont get Isabella Rosselini,geography.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Okay so, by melting, you meant melting.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Yeah.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 So is it like art?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Yeah, you can melt art. Hey, can I use your phone?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Um, yeah sure. Why you wanna call your Mom?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 No, I wanna melt it.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Oh, well um, not right now. Y'know Im just gonna go to bed, Ithink the fumes are giving me a headache.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	  Yeah!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Gnight, bro.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Gnight.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Here.  Y'know, just in case.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Oh, excellent. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 What kind of karate is that?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 No kind. He just makes it up.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 So hows it going with you guys?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 So far, it kinda blows. I dont know, I just thought y'know thathed feel more like a brother y'know, like you and Ross, just like close andconnected and....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Oh honey, were close now but you-you wouldnt believe theyears of-of nugies, and wedgies, and flying wedgies, and atomic wedgies, and.... Thats where the waistband actuallygoes over your head. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Ah!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Oh, we used to drive each other crazy playing the shadow game.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Oh, how do you play the shadow game?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Oh, how do you play the shadow game?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 I just asked you.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 I just asked you.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 I dont have time for this.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 No, that is what the game is.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Which you just gave up really quickly.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	  Have you seen Joey?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Whats the matter?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Oh, just this!  Yknow what its my fault really, because the couch is usually wherewe keep the varnish.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	  Hey, does somebody wanna hand me one of thosetiles.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Whats going on?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Hes retiling my floor. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yo!! Spackel boy! Get up!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Ah-ah-ah, now you started this, you will finish it.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 He started mine first!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Build the unit Cinderelly, lay the tile Cinderelly.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Whoa! Big octopus.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah.  Hello.  Oh myGod, I totally forgot!  Well cant someone else do it.  But, I havecompany.  Yeah, no look, thats all right Ill come in.  Um, Frank, Im really sorry but I have to go to work. Its-its oneof my regulars and hes insisting that I do um.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Hey, what kind of work do you do?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Oh! Im a masseuse. I give people massages and stuff.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 You-you work at one of those massage parlors?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Well, y'know we dont call it that, but yeah!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	  Wow! Thats wild! No, I had no idea.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 All righty. Ill be back in-in a little bit. Unless you wanna comewith me?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 You mean like watch?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 No, no, you can get one yourself. Itll be on the house! Y'knowwhat are big sisters for?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Well, I dont think this, y'know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 No, no, no, I wouldnt do you myself, I mean that would be weird.Yeah, no, Ill get one of the other girls to do it. Oh, this will be so much fun!Hey! Are you excited?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Yeah! Hey, do Monica and Rachel work there?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Its beautiful! Its like the first bathroom floor there everwas.  Whoa! Are you going in there for?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 What, like a number?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	  Hey! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Hi! Bye! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Okay, Im done with my choices, these are final. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Well, its about time.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Ooh, very official.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Oh, yeah, well y'know Chandler printed it up on his computer.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 And who laminated it?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 That would be me.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 All right let me see.  Uma Thurman, Winona Ryder,Elizabeth Hurely, Michelle Pfieffer, and Dorothy Hammel? 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Hey, its my list.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Okay honey, you do realize she only spins like that on ice.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Ow!-Ow!-Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Y'know, ow!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Hey!-Hey! Whats going on?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 She broke my arm.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Girl	 He touched my fanny.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 No, she touched mine first!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Girl	 Thats my job!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 So wait, whats the deal here, I can have sex with you, but Icant touch you?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe, Girl	 Ewww!!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 You cant have sex with her!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Girl	 Whatd you think I was, a hooker?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 No, your a masseuse, its cool, Im not a cop.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Okay, Jasmine, can you, can you ask Mr. Whiffler if he can wait for likefive minutes.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Jasmine	 Fine.  I dont like you!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	  So thats what you thought I did!!God! Thats not what I do!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Wait thats-thats, what thats not what you do?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Nooo! Why would you think that?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 I dont know, I mean, y'know, this is the city y'know, I just, Imean, I dont know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Whatever, its the perfect end to the perfect weekend anyways.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Oh, wait, no your right, no it was perfect and I cant believe thatI screwed it up so bad.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 You really thought it was perfect?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Well, no, maybe-maybe it wasnt perfect, but y'know it was prettycool, y'know, cause we had all those great talks y'know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah, um, which ones in particular were great for you?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Well y'know about the tongue thing, y'know, and how I told you about mylikes and my dislikes...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 I dont....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 How-how I like to melt stuff, and how I dislike stuff that doesntmelt.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Right, okay, um-mm.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Yeah, y'know I feel like I can really talk to you cause y'knowyoure my sister, y'know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Yeah, I guess I do, yeah.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Then I go feel your friend up and make you mad at me.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Well, I-I wasnt hopping mad, y'know.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 You hopped a little bit. Yeah, I really sorry.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Okay. All right, this is my favourite part of the weekend, right now,this.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 This?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Oh come on we went, we went to Time Square, we found ninja stars, Ialmost got arm broken by a hooker...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 She wasnt a hooker.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Frank	 Well, when I tell my friends about her she will be. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Okay, on three. One....Two....
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Why dont we just go on two.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Why two?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Because its faster.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yeah, I coulda counted to three like four times without all thistwo talk.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Oh!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 All right, but in the future...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Okay!! Okay!!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Come on!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Heavy thing, not getting lighter!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Okay, one...two...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 So we are going on two?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	All	 All right!! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Oh, good job Joe.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Wow, its big!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yeah-yeah, so big that it actually makes our doors look smaller! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Maybe, my rulers wrong.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Phoebe	 Maybe all the rulers are wrong.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Look its not that bad. So what, it blocks a little of your door, alittle of my door.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yeah, y'know what I got a better idea. How-how bout it blocksnone of mine door and a lot of yours? 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Yeah, listen, before I forget that side is still wet.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Okay sir, um-mm, let see if I got this right. Ah, so this is a half-caf,double tall, easy hazel nut, non-fat, no foam, with whip, extra hot latte, right?  Okay, great.  You freak.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	  Thank you.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	  Um, coffee to go, please.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Isabella Rosselini. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Are you serious?  Oh my God.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Damn! I cant believe I took her off my list.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Why? Cause otherwise youd go for it?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Yeah, maybe.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Oh-oh, you lie.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 What you dont think Id go up to her?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Yeah, well missy, you better be glad that list is laminated.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 You know what honey, you go ahead, well call her an alternate.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Okay, hold my crawler.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Okay.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Monica	 Rach, are you really gonna let him do this?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Rachel	 Honey, hes about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. Im justsorry we dont got popcorn.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	  Hi! Hi, Im Ross, you dont know me, but Ima big, big fan of yours. I mean, Blue Velvet, woo-oo hoo! Um, I was wondering if Icould um, maybe buy you a cup of coffee?  Or maybe reimburse youfor that one? 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Arent you with that girl over there? 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Well, yeah, kinda. Um, but thats okay, see we have an understanding,um, see we each have this list of five famous people,  so Im allowedto sleep with you. No, no, no, its flattery.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Im sorry. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Oh no, no, no, wait, wait, Isabella. Dont, dont just dismissthis so fast. I mean this is a once in a lifetime opportunity...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Yeah, for you. Is that the list?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Um, yeah.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 May I see it?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Um, no.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Come on! 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 But, okay.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	  Im not on the list!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Um, see, but thats not the final draft.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Its laminated!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 Yeah, um, okay see, you were, you were on the list but my friend, Chandler brought up the very good point that you are international, so I bumpedyou for Wynona Rider, local.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 Y'know its ironic...
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	 What?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Isabella	 ...because I have a list of five goofy coffee house guys and yesterdayI bumped you for that guy over there. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Ross	  Were just gonna be friends.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Y'know what?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Umm?
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 I bet ya ya I could fit in there. 
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Ive got five bucks says you cant.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Get out your checkbook, mister.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Oh, I think I have the cash.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 You are dogged man! I totally fit!
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Chandler	 Yeah, you got me.  Im out five big ones!  Here you go.
03	05	0305	The One With Frank Jr.	Joey	 Thank you. Cha-ching!  Oh, well hello Mr.Lincoln. Better luck next time buddy.  And the drinksare on me!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Janice	 Janice has a question. Who of the six of you has sleep with the six ofyou?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Wow, its like a dirty math problem.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Im sorry the answer there would be...none of us.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Janice	 Come on over the years none of you ever y'know, got drunk and stupid.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Well, thats really a different question.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Janice	 Im sorry I find it hard to believe that a group of people whospends as much time together as you guys do has never bumped uglies.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Well, there was that one time that Monica and Rachel got together.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica, Rachel	 What?!!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Excuse me, there was no time!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Okay, but lets say there was. How might that go?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Janice	 Okay, okay, well then answer me this. Has any of you ever.... almost?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Does anybody need more coffee?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Yeah, Ill take some.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Hey, theres a dog out there!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh, that is so unfortunate.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Cute naked guy is really starting to put on weight.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	  Okay, Ill be back in just a minute. Oh,Phoebe Im sorry that I left lipstick marks on the phone.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 You didnt leave lipstick marks on the phone.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh, then it mustve been you. Bye. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	  Bye-bye!  Thats why I moved out.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Hey, y'know while were on that, when are you gonna tell my sisterthat you dont live here anymore.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 I think on some levels she already knows.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Phoebe, she doesnt know that you sneak out every night, shedoesnt know that you sneak back every morning, and she doesnt know thatyouve been living with your Grandmothers for a week now.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Okay, well maybe not on those levels.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	  Hey.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Hey.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Im never gonna find a roommate, ever.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Why, nobody good?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Well lets see, there was the guy with the ferrets, thatsplural. The spitter. Oh-ho, and yes, the guy that enjoyed my name so much he felt the needto make a little noise every time he said it. Nice to meet you, Chandler Bing Bing!Great apartment Chandler Bing, Bing!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 So how many more do you have tomorrow?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Two. This photographer, who seemed really dull. And this actor guy,who Im not sure about, because when he called and I answered the phoneChandler Bing, he said Whoa-whoa, short message.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	  Ross , foot on thefloor or come over no more!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	  Sure, your dresser is missing but this she notices.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 I have to go. Yeah, Carol should be home by now, soo...
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Umm, hows it going with you guys?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Oh, better, actually. Y'know I-I-I think I finally figured out why we werehaving so much trouble lately.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh, really?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Yeah, y'know how I have you guys, well she doesnt really have anyclose friends that are just hers, but last week she meet this woman at the gym, Susansomething, and they really hit it off, and I-I-I think its gonna make a difference
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Soo, ah, Eric, what kind of photography do ya do?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 Oh, mostly fashion, so there may be models here from time to time, I hopethats cool.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Yes, that is cool. Because I have models here y'know......never.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 Oh, yeah, during the summer, I spend most weekends at my sistersbeach house, which you are welcome to use by the way. Although, I should probably tellyou, shes a porn star. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Well, listen I ah, still have one more person to ah meet, but unlessit turns out to be your sister, I think youre chances are pretty good.  All right. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	  Bedroom. Bathroom.Living room. This right here is the kitchen, and thanks for coming by, Bye-bye.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Dont you ah, dont you wanna ask me any questions?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Sure. Ummm. Whats up?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Well, ah, Im an actor. Im fairly neat. I ah, I got my own TV.Oh, and dont worry Im totally okay with the gay thing.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 What gay thing?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Ah, y'know just in general people being gay, thing. Im totally coolwith that.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Well okay Jerry, thanks for stopping by.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hi.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Hey!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Hey, Mon.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hey-hey-hey. You wanna hear something that sucks.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Do I ever.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Chris says theyre closing down the bar.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 No way!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Yeah, apparently theyre turning it into some kinda coffee place.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Just coffee! Where are we gonna hang out now?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Got me.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	  Can I get a beer.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hey, did you pick a roommate?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 You betcha!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Is it the Italian guy?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Um-mm, yeah right!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hes so cute.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Oh yes, and thats what I want a roommate that I can walk aroundwith and be referred to as the funny one.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh look, the pool tables free. Rack em up. Ill be backin just a minute. Get ready for me to whip your butt.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Okay, but after that, were shootin some pool.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	   Oh, um, no,no, no, no excuse me, hello. Hi. My friend ordered an onion, not an olive, and uh Iordered a rum and Diet Coke, which I dont think this is.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Waitress	 I am so sorry.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Thats all right.  I mean hard is it to get acouple drinks right, huh?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 1	 Well, I would like to propose a toast to the woman, who in oneyear from today, become Mrs. Dr. Barry Farber DDS
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Ummm, I think its time to see the ring again. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 2	 Oh, isnt it exciting, I mean its like having aboyfriend for life.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Yeah, I know.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 1	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Oh, I dont know. Well maybe its just the idea of Barry forthe rest of my life. I dont know I think I feel like I need to have one last fling,y'know, just to sorta get it out of my system. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 1	 Rachel stop!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 2	 Youre so bad!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Im serious, I really, I think I need just to havesome...meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Excuse, I seem to have dropped my ball.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Yeah, so?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	  And now Ive picked it up again. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh my God, I went to high school with her.  Rachel! Hi!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Monica! Look! Hi! What do ya think? 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh my God, you cant even see where the Titanic hit it.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Yes, his name is Barry, hes a doctor, thank you very much.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Awww, just like you always wanted. Congratulations
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Thank you. So how-how bout you, are-are you seeing anybody?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Aww, not right now.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Oh, but thats okay.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I know.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 So, Ill get-get back to my friend.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure.  Listen, can we please have lunch the nexttime Im in the city?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh, thatd be great.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Okay!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Thanks.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Bye!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Bye!  Ten bucks says, I never see that woman again in mylife.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 No real-, honey, really its fine, just g-go with Susan. Really, I,no, I think girls night out is a great idea. Okay, okay, bye
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 So what are they doing?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 I dont know, something girlie.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	  Hey, youre early.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What are you doing with the lamp?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Im just taking it to be re-wired.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh, well dont take it to the same place you took the stereo,cause theyve had that thing for over a week.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 No, no, Mr. Heckles no one is making any noise up here.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 Youre disturbing my oboe practice.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 You dont play the oboe!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 I could play the oboe!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Then Im gonna have to ask you to keep it down. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	  Who are you?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 Hi, Im Eric, Im gonna be Chandlers new roommate.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 Im Chandlers new roommate.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 I-I-I dont think so.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 I could be Chandlers new roommate.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 But, he told me over the phone.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 He told me in person.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Eric	 Thats weird.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Mr. Heckles	 Well, Im going to go into my new apartment now.  Ehh! 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hi, again.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Hey! 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	  Hey!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Thank you soo, much.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Oh, dont thank me, thank the jerk that never showed up. Okay, Igotta get to get to work.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 You want some help with that?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Oh, no thanks, I got it.  No I dont!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Whoa! Are you okay?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Whew! Stood up to fast, got a little head rush.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Its the heat. And-and the humidity.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Thats a uh, thats a tough combination.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Do you wanna come in for some lemonade?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Like you wouldnt believe.  Wow! This isa great place.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Thank you. Just make yourself comfortable.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Gotcha.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 This place is really my Grandmothers.  I got it from herwhen she moved to Florida, otherwise I could never afford a place like this. So if thelandlord ever asks, Im 87 year old woman, whos afraid of her VCR. So are youthirsty?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Oh, you bet I am!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	  Okay, heres your penis!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Oh my God!!! What are you doing?!!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 You said, you wanna come in for some lemonade?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 So?!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Whoa, ah!! Were you just gonna give me some lemonade?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Yeah huh!! Cover yourself up!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Oh right, right.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I dont believe this! When someone asks you in for lemonade, and toyou that means they wanna have sex?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Well usually...yeah! Well, not just lemonade, iced tea, sometimes juice.Well, sorry, I just, I thought you liked me. Im such a jerk.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Its okay. I suppose it could happen to anyone, not anyone I know,but... By the way I can still see it.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Pheebs?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Huh?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Wheres your bed?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Its not in the apartment?  Oh no. I cant believe this is happening again.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Okay, enough with the third degree! I-Ive, I dont live hereanymore.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What are you talking about?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Im sorry, I-I-I-I dont live here anymore. I-I didntknow how to tell you, but y'know everybody else knows!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Everybody knows!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 That was supposed to be a good thing, I forget why. Just listen, Monica,I, do you know, okay, do you know, I couldnt sleep for like a month because I gotlike a dot of ink on one of the sofa cushions. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Well, you-you coulda just turned the cushion over.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Yeah, I wouldve except I had a big spaghetti stain on the otherside.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What?!?!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Okay, this is what Im talking about, this. I-I need to live in aland where people can spill.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 You can spill. In the sink.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Aw, honey its not your fault, y'know this is who you are, and Ilove you, and I want us to be friends, and if I keep living here I dont see thathappening.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I love you, too. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Aww, good.  What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 What? Im just said.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 No youre not, youre wondering which cushion it is.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 So ah, whatcha watching?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Baywatch.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Whats it about?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Lifeguards.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Well, it sounds kinda stupid...  Whos she?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Nicole Eggert. You'll like her.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Wow! Look at them run.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 They do that a lot. Hey, you want a beer?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Yeah, Ill go get one.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 No, no, no, dont get up, I got a cooler right here.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Well, hello!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hey.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Do you have any beers? Were out of beers.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	  Help yourself.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 You okay?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Phoebe moved out.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Right.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I dont understand, I mean am I so hard to live, is this why Idont have a boyfriend?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Noo!! You dont have a boyfriend because....I dont, Idont know why you dont have a boyfriend. You should have a boyfriend.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Well, I think so.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Oh-ho, come here.  Listen, you are one of myfavourite people and the most beautiful woman Ive ever known in real life.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	  Hi. Where is everybody?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh, its already closed, Chris gave me the keys to lock up-what iswrong?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 My marriage, I think my marriage is um, is kinda over.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh no! Why?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Cause Carols a lesbian.  And, and Imnot one. And apparently its not a mix and match situation.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I dont believe it! Oh, you poor bunny.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	  Im an idiot. I mean shoulda seen it, I mean Carol and Id be out andshed, shed see some beautiful woman, and, and shed be Ross y'know lookat her, and Id think, God, my wife is cool!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Aw! Hey, do you think that Susan person is her lover?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Well, now I do!!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Im sorry.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Seven years. I mean weve been together seven years, shes theonly woman whos ever loved me, and the only woman Ive-Ive ever....
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Aw, God Ross. Oh.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Umm, this is nice.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I know, it is isnt it?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 No, I mean it, this feels really good. Is it a hundred percent cotton?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Yeah! And I got it on sale, too.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Anyway, I should go, one of the lifeguards was just about to dismantlea nuclear device.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Well, if you wanna get a drink later we can.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Oh yeah, that sounds great.  Oh, and listen,its, its gonna be....
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 I know. Thanks. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Maybe this wouldve happened if Id been more nurturing, orId paid more attention, or I... had a uterus. I cant believe this!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 I know no, no, y'know you dont deserve this, you dont Ross.Youre, youre really, youre so good. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Thanks.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 And youre so sweet.  Andyoure kind 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Thanks. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Huh?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Okay, its okay.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Wait, wait, wait.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 My foot is stuck in the pocket.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 No, I cant get it out.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Well, thats not something a girl wants to hear.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 No, come on dont start.  Ouch!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Stupid balls are in the way. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Oh well. It probably wouldve been the most constructive solution.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 You have chalk on your face.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Huh? 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Phoebe	 Oh, Ross youre right, I dont know why I always thought thiswas real grass.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Monica	 Hey, are you okay?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 My wifes a lesbian.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Joey	 Cool!!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 Ross-Joey, Joey-Ross. 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Ross	 Hi.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Chandler	 I cant believe you came back.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Dont say anything. I dont wanna speak, I dont wannathink. I just want you to take me and kiss me and make love to me right here, right now.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 2	 Rachel! Rachel! 
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 What?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 2	 You missed the exit!
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Oh, sorry.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Friend No. 1	 My God, what were you thinking about?
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Rachel	 Um,  Barry.
03	06	0306	The One With The Flashback	Her Friends	 Awwww!!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 So I told Carl, Nobody, no matter how famous their parents are,nobody is allowed to climb on the dinosaur. But of course this went in one ear andout.....
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 I love how he cares so much about stuff. If I squint I can pretendhes Alan Alda.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Oh good, another dinosaur story. When are those gonna become extinct?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 If I was a superhero who could fly and be invisible, thatwould be the best.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Gunther	 What does Rachel see in this guy? I love Rachel. I wish she was mywife.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Whos singing?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Hey. When you guys were kids and you played Happy Days, who wereyou? I was always Richie.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 I was always Joanne.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Question. Was ah, Egg the Gellers! the war cry of yourneighbourhood?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Ewww! Oh! Its the Mattress King!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Booo!!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	  Dont look honey. Change the channel! Change thechannel!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Janice	 Wait! Wait! I wanna see this. After I divorce him, half of that kingdomis gonna be mine.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Matress King	  Despair fills the mattress showroom. My kingdomis suddenly without a queen. Im so depressed Im going to slash... my prices!!Check it out! Four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set! Im going medieval onprices!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 What a wank!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Janice	 Oh, I cannot believe hes using our divorce to sell mattresses.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 I know! And four ninety-nine for a pillow top queen set, who cares aboutthe divorce, those babies will sell themselves.  And Imappalled for you by the way.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Matress King	  Im close. Im cheap. Im the king.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Okay.  Okay, daddy well see you tomorrow night. Okay bye-bye. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 We?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Are ah, having dinner with my Dad tomorrow night, I hope thatsokay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Oh shoot, tomorrows not so good, Im supposed to um, fall offthe Empire State building and land on a bicycle with no seat. Sorry.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Ross, my father doesnt hate you.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Please, he refers to me as wethead.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 But honey he calls everybody by a nickname! Okay, look, I know, allright, just one dinner, please, just one night for me, please. I just want him to love youlike I do.  All right, well not exactly like I do, but, but, if you docome to dinner, Ill love you like I do in that black thing that you like.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	  Ill go.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Fine.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Thank you.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Hi Gunther.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Gunther	 Yeah, well see!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	  Hey, you guys!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Hey!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Guess what?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 What?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 I got a gig!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	All	 Yay!!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 See, thats why I could never be an actor. Because I cantsay gig.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Yeah, I cant say croissant.  Oh my God!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Whats the part?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Well, its not a part, no. Im teaching acting for soap operasdown at the Learning Extension.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Come on! Thats great.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	All	 Wow!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. Its like my chance to give something back to the actingcommunity.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Yknow your probably not allowed to sleep with any of your students.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	  I know!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Ugh! I dont know Monica. It feels funny just being here. I mean ifyou buy a bed from Janices ex-husband, thats like betraying Chandler.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Not at these prices.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	   Hi. Y'know inEngland this car would be on the other side of the store.  Woo!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	  Oh! Ohhhhh! Oh! Phoebe, come here. Aw, thisis my new bed. You gotta feel this bad boy.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Eh, Monica it, it feels so weird, y'know, Chandlers your friend... Oh! Oh my God! Aw, all right take this bed, you can make otherfriends.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Good evening. Im Mr. Tribbiani. And I will be teaching acting forsoap operas. Now um, on my first day as  Dr. Drake Remoray on Days of OurLives,  I learned that one ofthe most important things in soap opera acting is reacting, this does not mean actingagain, it means, you dont have a line, but someone else just did. And it goes likethis.  Thanks,thanks, a lot. Oh, by the way, before I forget to work in soap operas some of you willhave to become much more attractive. All right, moving right along.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hi!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Hey! Ooh! How was teaching last night?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Oh it was great. Yeah, you get to say stuff like, Hey, the belldoesnt dismiss you, I dismiss you.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Ooooh, nice.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Oh, and guess what, I got an audition for All My Children.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh, yay!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Yeah, its this great part, this boxer named Nick. And Im so,so right for it, y'know, hes just like me. Except hes a boxer, and has an eviltwin.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh.  
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Guy	 Dom da-da dom! Here ye! Here ye! Delivery from the Mattress King.  You Miss Geller?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Okay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Guy	 Sign here. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh, do I have a middle name. All right Monica Velula Geller. Itsthat bedroom there. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hey, Monica bought a bed from the Mattress King?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Yeah, so please, please, please, dont say anything to Chandler.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 You want me to lie to Chandler?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Is that a problem?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 No.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh, hey, hey Nick the boxer lets see what you got. All right ya,put em up. Come on. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hey, youre ah, pretty good at this.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Yeah, well I had to learn, I was staying at the Y and some off the youngmen werent acting Christian enough.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Ahh!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hey now!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hey!!! Oww!! And Im bleeding.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh! Oh!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Okay, great.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Wow! And Im a vegetarian! All right, all right, well Imsorry, well put some ice on it. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Okay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Kay, put your head back.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 All right. I cant see.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 All right, I have ya. Oh God.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Guy	 Which bedroom do ya want it in Miss Geller?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Oh, its the compulsively neat one by the window, okay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Guy	 Gotcha. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Hi Daddy!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 This where they put it? What, there no table available in thekitchen! Hello, baby.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 You remember Ross.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Um-hmm.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Nice to see you again Dr. Green. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 So!   Hows the library?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Ugh, museum.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 What happened to the library?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 There never was a library. I mean there are libraries, its just that I ah,I never worked at one.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 You know whats really good here, the lobster. What do you sayshall I just order three.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Yeah, if youre really hungry.  It was ajoke, I made a joke.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Yeah, actually Daddy Ross is allergic to lobster.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 What kind of person is allergic to lobster? I guess the kind ofperson that works at a library.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Its not a library...
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	  I know!! Its a museum! What, youre theonly one around here who can make a joke! At least mine was funny. Ah, waiter, we willhave two lobsters and a menu. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 So, Dr. Green, hows the old boat.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 They found rust. You know what rust does to a boat?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 It gives it a nice antiquey look.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	  Rust, is boat cancer, Ross.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Wow. Im sorry, when I was a kid I lost a bike to that. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Excuse me for a moment, will you please, I want to say good night tothe Levines, before we go.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Okay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Okay! 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Aw honey stop! Its not that bad.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Yeah.  Op! Uh-oh! I think your Dad mustve addedwrong. He only tipped like four percent.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Yeah. Thats Daddy.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Thats Daddy?! But doesnt it bother you? Youre awaitress.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Yes, it bothers me Ross, but y'know if he was a regular at the coffeehouse, Id be serving him sneezers.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 So?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 So. Ross, Ive bugged him about this a million times, hes notgonna change.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 You really serve people sneezers?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Well um, I dont.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 You kids ready?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Thanks again, Dr. Green.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 All right.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, I think I forgot my receipt.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Oh, ah, you dont need that.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Why not?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 The carbon, its messy, I mean it gets on your fingers and causes,the, the ah, night blindness.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	  What is this? Who put atwenty down here? Huh?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Oh, yeah, that would be me, um, I have, I have a problem I-I tip way toomuch, way, way, too much, its a sickness really.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Yeah it is, it is.  We really, really have to do somethingabout that.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 I know.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Excuse me, you think Im cheap?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Oh Daddy, no he didnt mean anything by that, he reallydidnt.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Nothing I do means anything, really.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 This is nice. I pay two hundred dollars for dinner, you put downtwenty, and you come out looking like Mr. Big Shot. You really want to be Mr. Big Shot?Here, Ill tell you what, you pay the whole bill, Mr. Big Shot, all right. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Well Mr. Big Shot is better than wethead.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Okay, some tricks of the trade. Now, Ive never been able to cry asan actor, so if Im in a scene where I have to cry, I cut a hole in my pocket, take apair of tweezers, and just start pulling. Or ah, or, lets say I wanna convey thatIve just done something evil. That would be the basic I have a fishhook in myeyebrow and I like it  Okay, lets say Ive just gotten bad news, well all I do there is tryand divide 232 by 13.  And thats how its done. Great soapopera acting tonight everybody, class dismissed.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 Hey, Mr. Trib.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Hey-hey.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 Guess what, I got an audition!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Awww, one of my students got an audition. Im so proud.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 I was wondering if you would consider coaching me for it?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 You bet! Whats the part?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 Oh its great, its a role on All My Children, Nickthe boxer.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 You had to do it, didnt you? You couldnt just leave italone.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Four percent. Okay. I tip more than that when theres a bug in myfood.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Ross, tonight was about the two of you getting along.  Oh, would you just see my chiropractor, already.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Yeah, Im gonna go to a doctor who went to school in a mini-mall.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, what are you doing?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Im, Im freaking out! Monica kinda trusted me with somethingand she shouldnt have! All right, I havent lived here in a while, so I have toask you something. Does Monica still turn on the lights in her bedroom?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Um. yeah.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 I am soo dead. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 All right, look, heres the bottom line Ross, this is fixable, ifwe act fast, okay. So, Ill invite him to brunch tomorrow and you can make nice.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Look, honey, I have tried to make nice, it doesnt work.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Okay, look, Ross, I realise that my Father is difficult, but thatswhy you have got to be the bigger man here.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Look sweetie, I could be the bigger man, I could be the biggest man, Icould be a big, huge, giant man, and it still wouldnt make any difference, exceptthat I could pick your Father up and say Like me! Like me tiny doctor!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Okay, well cant you just try it one more time Ross? For me? Forme?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Rachel one brunch is not gonna solve anything. You gotta face it, okaywere never gonna get along.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Okay, well you are just gonna have too, okay. Because I already got aMother and a Father who cannot stay in the same room together, okay, I dont wannahave to have a separate room for you too!! 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Okay, okay, okay.  Ill get the bagels.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	  Whats this?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Isnt it cool! Varoom! Varoom!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 This is not the bed I ordered!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 I know, you mustve won like a contest or something! 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Phoebe!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Why is this car in my bedroom?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Im sorry, okay, I-I wasnt looking, and the store says thatthey wont take it back because you signed for it...
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 When did I sign for it?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 When I was you! Y'know what, its all Joeys fault,cause he left his nose open!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Did you make brownies today?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 Knock, knock.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	  Quick, take off your dress, he wont notice the bed.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 Hey, Im going for sushi does anybody want..  Whoa-whoa, somebody missed the off ramp.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Its Monicas bed. What?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 Okay.  Its a racecar.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 So. This has always been Monicas bed, what youre justnoticing now, how self-involved are you?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 Okay, well it this bed isnt new, how come there is plastic onthe mattress?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Sometimes I have bad dreams. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 Look, I just saw my best friends brains smeared across the canvas,thats not gonna be me, not me.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Wow! That was good. That was... Tweezers?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 No.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Whoa. That was really good.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Student	 Thanks, any suggestions?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 You told him to play the boxer gay!!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Well, I-I mightve said supergay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 You totally screwed him over.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Joey, youre this guys teacher. I mean how could you do this?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Because, Monica, the guys so good, and I really, really want thispart.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Phoebe	 Well, if you really, really want it, then its okay.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	  Hi Daddy.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Baby. Ross.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Dr. Green. How are you? 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Thanks for dinner last night.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Thank you for teaching me a valuable lesson.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Nice hair. Whatd ya do? Swim here?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	  Okay, thats it, I cant take it anymore.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 What? What? Hes interested in you. He-he likes your hair, he justwants to know how you got here.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Oh, please. Sweetie its hopeless, okay, Im just gonna go.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 What?!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Look, look Im sorry. Its just that....
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Ross? Whats with the neck?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Hes got this thing. And I keep telling him to go to mychiropractor...
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Youre still going to that chiropractor, that man couldntget into medical school in Extapa!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Thank you! Thats what I keep saying.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Uh.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Wait a minute, his name is Dr. Bobby?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Well thats his last name.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 And his first name.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Hes Bobby Bobby?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Its Robert Bobby.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Oh.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 And um, excuse me, he helps me.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Oh-ho please. Ask her how?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 What do you need help for?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 With my alignment. Ive got one leg shorter than the other.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Oh God!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Argue with that.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 What? Its true, my right leg is two inches shorter.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Come on! Youre just titling!  Her legs are fine!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 I know that!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 So, why do you let her go to a chiropractor for?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Im sorry, let her?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 What can I do, she doesnt listen to me about renters insuranceeither.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Wait a minute, you dont have renters insurance?!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 No.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Well what if somebody steals something? How are you gonna run afterhim with one leg shorter than the other?!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Hey, would you ah, would you like some juice?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Dr. Green	 Id love some juice. Thanks.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Okay.  Wow! This is going so well. Did you see us? Did you see?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Rachel	 Yeah honey, Im standing right there! Why didnt you just tellhim about the mole I havent got checked yet.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Ross	 Excellent!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	  There will come a time in each of your careers when youllhave a chance to screw over another soap opera actor. I had such an opportunity in therecent, present. And Im ashamed to say that I took it, I advised a fellow actor toplay a role, homosexually. Yeah, we both auditioned for the part, and uh, as it turnedout, they ah, they liked the stupid gay thing and cast him. And now, hes got a twoyear contract opposite Susan Luchhi, the first lady of daytime television, and me, meIm stuck here teaching a bunch of people, most of whom are too ugly to even be onTV. Im sorry, Im sorry, Im sorry.  Thank you.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Jester	 Uh, may I help you?
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Monica	 Yeah, I talked to you on the phone, Im the lady that got stuckwith the racecar bed.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Jester	 Look, its like I told you, theres nothing I can do. Yousigned for it, Monica Velula Geller.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 All right, Jester man, look we wanna see the king.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Jester	 Nobody sees the king!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Joey	 Oh-ho-kay, Im talking to the king. 
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Jester	 Hey! You cant go back there!
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Janice	 Oh my God.
03	07	0307	The One With The Race Car Bed	Chandler	 Varrrrrroom! Hey! Watch it lady! Varrrrrrrrrrom!  Hey-hey good lookin!  Varrrrrrrrroom. All right, Ill leave. My beds so boring.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Here you go Pheebs. Who else wants one of my special homemade brownies? 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I will have one. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Okay, Im not gonna have one.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Neither will I. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 No, no, its just my tooth.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 All right Ill have one. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 So whats a matter, you need a dentist? Ive got a good one.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 No thanks, I have a good one too. I just, I, I cant see him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 See that is the problem with invisible dentists.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Why? Why cant you go to him?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Because, every time I go to the dentist, somebody dies.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 That is so weird, because every time I go to the dentist, I look downthe hygienists blouse.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Phoebe, what? Umm...what?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah, first there was my aunt Mary, and then there was umm, John,my mailman, and then my, my cowboy friend Albino Bob.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 And all these people actually died?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Yes, while I was in the chair! Thats why I take such good care ofmy teeth now, y'know, its not about oral hygiene, I floss to save lives!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Pheebs, come on, you didnt kill anybody, these people just happenedto die when you went to the dentist. Its, its, its just ah, acoincidence.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Well tell that to them. Oh! You cant, their dead.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Thanks, Gunther.   Hey!  Umm, can I get a napkin too?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Gunther	 Oh, like you dont already have everything.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	  Ow! Ow! 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 All right, fine, fine, but if youre my next victim, dontcome back as a poltergeist and like suck me into the TV set.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 I promise.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Although, dont feel like you cant visit.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	  Hey, is, is, is Chandler here?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	  No, no hesnot.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 You guys, Joey just saw Janice kissing her ex-husband.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 What?  So what are you going to do? I mean how, how are you goingto tell Chandler?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Well, I was thinking about that and I, I think the best way would be, tonot.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Joey, you cant keep this to yourself, if you know about this, youhave to tell him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Itll kill him. I mean itll, itll just kill him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Well, you could wait til I go to the dentist, maybe Illkill him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	  Ewww! Ugly Naked Guy is using his new hammock.Its like a Play-Doo Fat Factory. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Well, Im going to the dentist, so listen, okay, just be on thelook out for anything that, that, that you can fall into, or, or that can fall on you,or... All right, just look out! Okay, And um, I also just wanna, I just wanna tell you allthat um...... 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Okay, I have a problem I have to go into work for a few hours, some kidsmessed up the Homo Sapien display.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 What did they do?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Well, they painted over the word Sapien for one thing, thenthey rearranged the figures, lets just leave it at that.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 So, do you want me to watch Ben for you?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Yes, thats what I was going to ask, thank you.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Whoa! Wait! Hello! What about me?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 You? You! Want to watch Ben?  Yes! Thatdbe great, no, I just wanted to ask Monica, because I know how empty her life is. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Hey-hey, Ross?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Yeah.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Ive got a science question.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Hmm?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 If the Homo Sapiens, were in fact Homo-sapien, is that whythere extinct?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Joey, Homo Sapiens are people.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Hey-hey, Im not judging.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	  Look Benny, spoon.  Spoon. Comeon! All right, y'know what I think hes bored.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Here. Ben, do you wanna play the airplane game, do you wanna showRachel? Come here.  Were gonna do something fun. Okay.  Weee!!  Weee!! 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	  Whos so brave, youre so brave, yes you are,youre so brave.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Okay. Okay honey, hes fine, hes fine, lets just puthim down. Come here, Ben.  See thats a good boy. How could you do that to him!! Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Hes not gonna say anything, because were not gonna tell him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Were not?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 No were not.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 All right, I like that. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Okay.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 So were okay, were okay, were okay,  arent we? No, were not okay, were not okay, theres a bump,theres a bump.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh my God! Well push it in! Push it in!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 I cannot push it in!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Okay, were gonna need a distraction.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Okay, okay, okay.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 I got it!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Okay.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 The second that Ross walks in that door, I want you take him back toyour bedroom and do whatever it is that you do that makes him go,  rweee!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Or. We could put a hat on his head.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 A hat! Yes! We need a hat.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 We need a hat..
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Where are we gonna find a tiny little hat?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Oh, oh, oh, Ill get Rainy Day Bear!! 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Because hell know what to do?  Oh my God, youre a genius!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Oh God, oh God, its sowed on though.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Give it. Give it.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Okay.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica, Rachel	 Oh!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Oh, its just like a bloodbath in here today.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Hey! Hold on a minute, hold on a second. Do you think these pearls arenice?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Id really prefer a mountain bike.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Janices birthday is coming up, I want to get her somethingspeacial. Come in here with me.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, whoa. Do you ah, want to get her somethingspeacial, get her flowers, get her candy, get her gum, girls love gum.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Thats a good idea, Dear Janice have a Hubba-Bubbabirthday. I would like to get her something serious.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Oh, you want something serious. Y'know what you should do, you should gether one of those um, barium enemas. Those are dead serious.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 All right. Look, Im gonna go in here, and you dont buy meanything ever. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	  No, no, you cant, you cant, okay, youcant, you cant buy her pearls, you just cant, you cant, youcant.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Why not?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Oh God. Uh, okay, heres the thing, this is the thing, okay, thething is...
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 What is the thing?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Okay. I went down to the Mattress King showroom and, and I sawJanice, kissing her ex-husband.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	  What?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 They were in his office.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Well she, she wouldnt do that, shes with, shes withme.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Im telling you man, I saw it.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Yeah, well, youre wrong! Okay, youre wrong.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Im not wrong! I wish I was. Im sorry. Bet that barium enemadoesnt sound so bad now, huh?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 It just makes more sense as an ensemble.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Right.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Besides, it takes the focus off the hat.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	  No! Oh! Youre alive! Youre alive!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 See Pheebs, I promised you no one would die, didnt I?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, well see about that. Can I use your phone? I justwanna call everyone I know.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Sure, we have no money, go ahead.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	  Hey! Youre not dead! Okay, see ya!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ben	 Monica.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh my God! He just said my name! Did you hear that?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ben	 Monica bang!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Okay, I heard that.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Did he just say Monica bang?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh my God! Hes gonna rat me out!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ben	 Monica bang!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh-ho-ho, sweetie, sweetie, you gotta stop saying that, now. Itsno big deal, its not even worth mentioning, you see we all do it all the time. Seewatch this, Ben, Ben, Ben.  Ow, Monicabang!  Everybody bang.  Ben bang.  Rachel bang. Bang, Rachel bang! Oh, isnt that fun?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	  Look at that!  Lookat that!  We all do it.  Okay, Im stopping now.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 You okay?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Y'know, if its not a headboard, its just not worthit.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	  Hows my Bing-a-ling?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Ah, I dont know, you tell me. Anything you ah, wanna tell me,because, if you ah, you should, if you, you would, tell me.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Why are your eyes so white?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 You tell me! Maybe, its because I was just fooling with my ex!Oh no-no-no-no, no-no-no-no, that was you!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Oh my God!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 All right!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 How did you know?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Joey told me, he saw you two kissing.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 In the park?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 No! In his office! How many kisses were there?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Just those two!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Wh-wh-why, wh-why, why, why was there kissing!? There should be nokissing!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Oh, Im sorry honey, Im so, so,  haaaaa! Imso, so sorry, I just  haaaaaa! But I, oh what happened was, I-I-I cantbreathe. Can you get me a bag, or something?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	  Here.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 The receipt.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Ill take it! All right look, I gotta know. Are you finished withme?  Are you finished with him?  Doyou still love him?  Do you still love me?  All right look,  Im gonna need an actual answer here okay,so which is it, him or me? 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 I dont know.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	  Okay. If youre alive you answer your phone!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Okay, Ben, I wont tell your daddy that you had ice cream fordinner, if you dont tell about our little bonking incident.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Monica, number one, I dont think Ben understands the concept ofbribery, and number two, I...   What?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 You said number two.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 I also said number one.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 I know. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	  Hey! Everyone.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Hi!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Hows my little boy?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Hes perfect, hes never been better.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	  Whatd you do, take him whaling?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ben	 Monica.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Oh my God, he just said your name, thats great! Good job Ben.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ben	 Monica bang!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh thats right, thats what Id sound like if Iexploded.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Woo-Hoo! The curse is broken! I called everybody I know, and everyone isalive.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Uh.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 What?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Ugly Naked Guy looks awfully still. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I killed him! I killed another one! And this curse is gettingstronger too, to bring down something that big.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Well maybe hes just taking a nap.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Im tellin ya, he hasnt moved since this morning.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 All right, we should call somebody.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 And tell them what? The naked guy we stare at all the time isntmoving.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Well, we have gotta find out if hes alive.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 How are we gonna do that? Theres no way.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Well, there is one way. His windows open, I say, we poke him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Hey! Y'know how we ah, save all those chopsticks for no reason we get whenwe get Chinese food?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Yeah.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Well, now we got a reason.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 What?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Well, were fashioning a very long poking device.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 All right.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Hey uh, whats a matter?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I talked to Janice.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Oh my God, is she going back to him?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 She doesnt know. Says she loves us both. Y'know I woke up thismorning and I was in love, well I was happy. Y'know it serves me right for buying thattwelve pack of condoms. And now I cant even return them, because she choked on thereciept!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 What are you ah, what are you gonna do?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I dont know, y'know. What, what, would you do?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Well, it doesnt matter what I would do.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Come on, tell me.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 All right, youre probably not gonna want to hear this but ah, if itwas me, and this is just me,  I would ah, Iwould bow out.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 What?  What are you, what are you talking about?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 They have a kid together, y'know. Theyre like, theyre like afamily, and if, I dont know, theres chance they could make that work, I know Iwouldnt want to be the guy who stood in the way of that. Are you okay? Do you wannaah, come poke a nude guy?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Well, hes finally alseep. About that ah, bump on his head?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Are you, are you, are you sure its ah, a new bump? I mean, nooffense, Ive always thought of Ben as a fairly bumpy headed child.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Its okay if he bumps his head, kids bump their heads all the time,y'know, it was your first time babysitting, I figured you did the best you could.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	  I did!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 I know! Im saying you have to watch them all the time.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 I did!! I watched! I watched! I watched Monica bang his head againstthat thing!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Monica did it?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Monica?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Yeah.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Umm, did you notice anything wierd about Ben today?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 No. Why?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Well, I was just playing with him, and y'know we were doing the alphabetsong, which he used to be really good at, but suddenly hes leaving out eand f. Its like they just ah, I dont know, fell out of his head.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Really?!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Oh, and also, hes, hes walkin kind of funny, his leftleg is moving a lot faster than his right leg, and hes in there just sort ofy'know...  
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 Oh my God, I wrecked your baby!! 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 I hope its still funny when youre in hell.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	  You jerk! You know how much I love that kid!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Monica bang! Monica bang!  Ow!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Ill get the hat.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Janice, I have something I need to tell you, and I want you to let meget through it, because its, its, its not gonna be easy.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Okay.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I think you should go back with Gary. I dont wanna be the guythat breaks up a family, y'know when my parents split up, it was because of that guy.Whenever I would see him I was always think y'know Youre the reason, you arethe reason why their not together. and I hated that guy. And it didnt matterhow nice he was, or how happy he made my Dad.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Wow!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Yeah, well. Its the right thing to do.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Oh! Youre right. Oh God. But, before I can saygood-bye, theres something I really need you to know, Chandler. The wayI feel about you, its like, I finally understand what Lionel Richies beensinging about. Y'know, I mean what we have, its like movie love, youre mysoulmate, and I cant believe were not going to be spending the rest of ourlives together.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Then dont leave me!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 What?
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Forget what I said, I was babbling! Pick me!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 No, you were right, you were right. I mean, I-I-Ive got to give mymarriage another chance.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 No you dont! No, no, no, I say you have to give your divorceanother chance.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	  Im sorry. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Ohhh. Dont go.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 No, I-I-I gotta go. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 No. No! No! No!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Honey, honey, people are looking.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I dont care!  Idont care!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Yeah, um, Im, Im leaving now. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 You cant leave! I have your shoe!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Janice	 Good-bye Chandler Bing. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Gunther	 Rachel has those in burgendy.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 All right now remember, something this big and long is going to bedifficult to manuver, fortunately I have a lot of experience in that area.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 Can we please focus here, a naked mans life hangs in the balance!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Im telling you hes dead. What we are about to have here is adead fat guy on a stick.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 All right, ladies and gentlemen, lets poke.  Steady. Steady. Okay, a little higher. Careful of the angle.Okay, okay, were approaching the window  Thread the needle. Thread theneedle. 
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Hes alive! Hes a-live!!!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Monica	 And yet, were still poking him.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Okay, retract the device, retract the device.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Ross	 He does not look happy.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Rachel	 Hey-hey, now hes showing us his poking device.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Joey	 Hey, thats never gonna make it all the way over here, buddy!
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	  Ill hold you close in my arms.  I cant resist your charms. And love....
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	  Love....
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler, Phoebe	 Ill be a fool for you. Im sure, you know Idont mind.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	  No you know I dont mind.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler, Phoebe	 Yes! You mean the world the world to me. Oh...
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 I know.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 I know.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler	 Ive found.
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Phoebe	 Ive found....
03	08	0308	The One With The Giant Poking Device	Chandler, Phoebe	 ...in you, my endless  love.  My endlesslove. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	The Guys	  Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Awww!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Hey, its your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watchingfootball, you could help.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	The Guys	 We will. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay, Rachel, you wanna put the marshmellows in concentric circles.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. I wantto do this. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Every year.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Y'know, for once, I am going to sit down and try to watch one of thesethings. .
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Halftime.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Hey, who wants to ah, throw the ball around a little, maybe get a littlethree on three going?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Oh! That would be sooo much fun!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Oh, can I play too? Ive never played football, like ever. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Great, you can cover Chandler.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No, no, no, I dont, I dont really wanna play.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Come on man! You never want to do anything since you and Janice broke up.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Thats not true! I wanted to wear my bathrobe and eat peanutclusters all day. I wanted to start drinking in the morning. Dont say that Idont have goals!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Chandler, you have to start getting over her. All right, if you play, youget some fresh air, maybe itll take your mind off Janice, and if you dontplay, everyone will be mad at you cause the teams wont be even. Come on.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Yeah, all right, Ill play.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Yay!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Lets do it! Ross?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 What?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Do you wanna play football?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Um, Monica and I arent supposed to play football.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Says who? Your mom?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica, Ross	 Yeah.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Well, every, every Thanksgiving um, we used to have a touch footballgame called the Geller Bowl.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No, no, no, you say that proudly.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Anyway, Ross and I were always captains, and um, it got kindvecompetitive and one year, Geller Bowl VI, I accidentally broke Rosss nose.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 It was soo not an accident. She saw I was about to tag her, so shethrew her big fat grandma arm elbow right into my face. And just keep running.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 To score the winning touchdown, by the way.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, whoa, ho, ho, ho, you did not win the game, the touchdowndidnt count, because of the spectacularly illegal, oh and by the way savage nosebreaking.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	  I won the game.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Oh yeah! Then how come you didnt get the Geller Cup?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Um, there was a Geller Cup?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game. But our Dad said,nobody won that game,  and he was sick of our fighting, so he took the trophyand....  threw itin the lake.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 And was the curse lifted?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Anyway. Thats when our Mom said we were not to play football everagain.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Y'know what, I think we should play a game. I mean come on, itsbeen twelve years.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Can I see you for a second?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	  Once!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 All right, were gonna play.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 But wait a minute though, how are we gonna get there, though, becausemy Mom wont let me cross the street.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay. Lets bring it in.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Here you go. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	  That almost hit me in theface.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 All right, we have to pick captains.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 And then Tineals.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Okay, so how do we decide that?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Well, why dont we just bunny up.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel, Chandler, Joey	 What?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica, Ross	  Bunny!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay, looks like Ross and I are captains. Okay, so um, I bunnied firstso that means I get to pick first. Joey.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Thank you.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Monica, Im your best friend.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Sweetie, dont worry youll get picked. Chandler.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Ross!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Phoebe.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Sweetie, now I pick you.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 You dont pick me! Youre stuck with me!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay. All right. So lets see, lets play from the trash can, tothe lightpost. Right. Two hand touch, well kick off.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right people listen, Ive got exactly twenty-eight minutesbefore I have to baste again.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Wow! Just like in the pros.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Huddle up.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	  All right, huddle up, right over here.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Wait for me! Wait for me! Wait for me! Oh cool, this is my first huddle.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Okay, so what do you guys really think of Chandler?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay, Phoebe you know what youre doing right?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Yeah.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Okay, Joeys gonna catch it, and you and I are gonna block.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Whats block?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Phoebe, I thought you said you know what youre doing?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 I thought you meant in life.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Break.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 The ball is Janice. The ball is Janice. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Oww!! Son of a...!! Ow! Come on!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Sorry. Im sorry. Y'know what, were just gonna throw it.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 I got it. 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Go! Go! Go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Score!! 7 to nothing!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	  Are you okay?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Come on, lets go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Losers walk!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Yeah, losers talk!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No, no, no, actually losers rhyme.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	  Twenty-three!! Seventy-four!!  You wanna go shotgun?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Yeah!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	  Hike!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica, Joey	 One-Mississippi. Two-Mississippi. Three-Mississippi.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Over here!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	  I almost caught that one!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Great! Now, the score is 7 to almost 7.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay,  this play, I want you to do a down and out to theright. Okay. Break!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Wait, what am I gonna do?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 You, you go long.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Wait, how long?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Until we start to look very small.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Okay.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Break!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Set....hike!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 One-Mississippi, two-Mississippi, switch! Switch! Switch!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No, no, no, no, no!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Haaaaa! Hey-hey, thanks for stopping our ball.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Woman	  You are playing American football?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Yeah! Wow, your like from a whole other country.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Woman	 Im Dutch.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Hi-hi, Im Joey.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Woman	 Im Margha.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Im sorry Dutch, I didnt get that last little bit.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	  Hey Joey, do you wanna play football or you wanna..  Hi, Im Chandler.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Hello, Chandler.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Her name is Dutch, and also Marklan.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Margha.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Mar-klan.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Mar-gha.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Mar-haaaan.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Come on guys! Lets go! Come on, its second down.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Uh, hello, its third down.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 No its not, its second.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Wow!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Wow, what?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 It just amazes me that your still pulling stuff like this.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Pulling what? Its second down.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay, its second down.  Take all the second downs youneed.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 I heard that!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Well, I said it loud.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 It is okay, if I stay and watch?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler, Joey	 Yeah! Why dont you stick around. You can sit rightthere.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Well, that went well.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 I think so.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Y'know, I was thinking about ah, asking her for her number.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Thanks man, but I think it makes a stronger statement if I ask for itmyself, y'know.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Whoa-ho, whoa! No, I was thinking about y'know for me, as a part ofthat whole getting over Janice thing you were talking about.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Oh, yeah, that. All right, means that much to ya, Ill let you haveher.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Thanks. What, let me have her?! What do mean? Like if you didntI wouldnt have a shot?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Well I dont like to say it out loud, but, yeah! Dont feel badman, we all have our strengths. Youre better with numbers and stuff.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Math!! Youre giving me math! All right, look y'know what, forgetabout it, you go for the girl, well see who gets her.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Chandler, I want you to run a post pattern to the left, okay. Andsweetie..
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Yeah, I know, go long. Y'know, its like all Im doing isrunning back and forth from the huddle.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Well ah, you wanna just stay out there?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Can I see that for second.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Yeah.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay. Hut! Hike!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Fumble!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 What the hells the matter with you?! This is my favourite jersey.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Well now you have two. Hey, I am good at math.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 All right, thats it. Y'know I was still gonna let you have her. Butnow, forget about it. Prepare to feel very bad about yourself.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Hey! Well, Ive been preparing for that my entire life! Orsomething about you thats mean!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right, come on guys, lets go! Tie score, and wererunnin out of time. Forty-two!! Thirty-eight!! Hike! 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Oh I got it!!  Oh! Ew! Broken boob! Ow!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Pheebs, run!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Run, Phoebe, run!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Touchdown!! Touchdown!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Uh, hello, the buzzer buzzed. It doesnt count.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 After the snap!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Before the snap!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 After!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Before!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Now, does it really matter?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	All	 Yes!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Well, okay, I made a touchdown. It was my first touchdown. So?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Oh Pheebs, thats great. It doesnt count.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Does so count!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Cheater, cheater, compulsive eater.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Y'know what, thats fine, maybe you havent grown up, but Ihave.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Oh-ho, okay.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Dead leg!! 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Ow! Ow! Okay, okay, fine, fine! All right, you wanna win by cheating, goahead, all right. Phoebe the touchdown does count, you win.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Woo-yay!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 No! Listen, Im not gonna go through this with you again, okay.Just once I wanna beat when you cant blame it on the broken nose, the buzzer, or thefact that you thought you were getting mono. Lets just call this, tie score andits halftime.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay, first of all, I dont play with cheaters, and second of all,you know I had swollen glands!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Y'know what? Ill think youll play.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Oh really! Why is that?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Because the winner gets this!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 The Geller Cup.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Is everybody else seeing a troll doll nailed to a two by four?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	All	 Yeah.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Okay, good.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay, where in the hell did you get that?!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 When Mom and Dad drove you to the hospital to get your nose fixed, Iswam into the lake and fished it out.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 That cup is mine!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 No its not! You want it, youre gonna have to win it!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 All right, so are we not having dinner at all?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Come on Phoebe, lets go! Come on, its time to get serious,huddle up. Joey, keep your head in the game.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Its hard, y'know, his huddle is closer to Dutch girl.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right look, if I take Chandler out of the running will you be ableto focus?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 What are you gonna do?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right, you just make sure that Chandler catches the ball, Illtake care of the rest.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Okay.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Break!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Here you go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Chandler! Chandler!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	  Hi.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Whoa! Whoa!! Tackled by a girl! Bet ya dont see that everyday, doya?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats with the tackling?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 What?! I just touched him and he went over.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay, you wanna play rough, we can play rough.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 I love this game!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Hey, whered you get that?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 I went really long.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Forty-two to twenty-one! Like the turkey, Ross is done!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Its no surprise that your winning, cause you got to pickfirst, so you got the better team.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Youre so pathetic! Why cant you just accept it, werewinning because Im better than you.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Oh, what a great argument, exhaling! All right, y'know what, Illprove it to you, okay. Ill trade you Joey for Rachel, and Ill still win thegame.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 What?! The guys against the girls? See, thats ridiculous Monica,because Im only down by three touchdowns.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Oh, then bring it on! Oh, unless of course your afraid you might lose toa bunch of girls.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Fine, fine, Rachel your with Monica, Joey youre with me.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 I can not believe your trading me!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Come on Rach, come on. Lets see whats it like to be on awinning team for a change.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Are you gonna let me play?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right then.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	  The game is over, we eat now?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, the games not over, were just switchingteams.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Yeah, Chandler finds me so intimdating that its better if wereon the same team.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Right. Okay, lets play. Lets go.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 No ah, hold on a second Joe, where do Dutch people come from?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Ah well, the ah, Pennsylvania Dutch, come from Pennsylvania.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 And the other ah, Dutch people, they come on from somewhere near theNetherlands, right?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Nice try.  See the Netherlands is this make believe place wherePeter Pan and Tinker Bell come from.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Oh, my.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Enough with geography for the insane, okay? Lets play some ball,guys.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Whoa, whoa, no, no, I-Im not playing with this guy, now.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Fine with me.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Okay, y'know what, lets just cut to the chase here. Okay? Heidi,which of my boys do you like?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler, Joey	 What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Which do I like?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Yeah, y'know for dating, general merriment, taking back to yourwindmill...
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Well, if I had to chose right now, which by the way I find really weird,I would have to say, Chandler.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Yes!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Wait a minute! Wait a minute! She obviously didnt understand thequestion.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Well, you dont you have Captain Hook explain it to her.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Im sorry, Joey, that is my chose.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 You hear that! That is her chose, mister Ill let you have her! Iwin! You suck! I rule all! A mini-wave in celebration of me!! 
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 Im now thinking I would like to change my answer to, no one.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Wh-what?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Margha	 I now find you shallow and um, a dork. All right, bye.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 Nice going. You just saved yourself a couple months of sex.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Y'know what, it doesnt matter, cause she picked me. Me!From now on I get the dates and you have to stay home on Saturday nights watching Ready,Set, Cook!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Save the breakthroughs for therapy, okay. The clock is ticking. We have notime, and we are losing, we are losing to girls.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Were not gonna lose to girls.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Hey! Its 42-21!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 This sucks, I was just up by that much!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Are we playing football or what? Come on you hairy-backed Marries.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 We have to do this. We are playing for women everywhere. Okay, justthink about every lousy date that you ever had, okay, every guy who kept on the TV whileyoure making out...
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Oh my God! You dated someone with a glass eye too?!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Come on, okay, come on this is for all womankind. Lets killum!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Yeah!!! Kill um!!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 All right, no, well I want to kill them to, but their boys, y'know howare we gonna beat three boys?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right, we still have a minute and a half to go, and were downby two points. Two points....  Phoebe you do a button-hook again. Rachel, you go long.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 No! Come on! Dont make me go long. Use me. They never cover me.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Honey, theres a reason.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 God, Im not lame, okay. I can do something. I can throw, would youlet me throw, come on this is my game too.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Come on Mon, let her throw the ball.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right Rachel, you sweep behind, Ill pitch it to you, you throwit down field to Phoebe. All right. Break.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Thank you! Break!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Thirty-two! Seventy-one! Hike!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	The Guys	 One-Mississippi! Two-Mississippi! Three-Mississippi!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Im so sorry! Are you okay?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 No! Im not okay!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Im sorry, they were just all coming at me, and I didnt knowwhat to do.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	  Thirty seconds left on the timer!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Okay, okay, so we get to take that stupid troll thing home!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Come on! Come on! Hurry! Were running out of time! Huddle up!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Okay. Oooh! Oh, this is our last huddle, yeah.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 All right, Phoebe get open. Rachel, go long.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	  Okay.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Break!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	  I got a touchdown! We did it!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Hey-hey-hey Rachel, funny thing. Actually, the ah, end zone starts atthat pole, so youre five feet short, so we win!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Wait-wait-wait-wait! So, explain something to me though, if, if nobodytagged Rachel, then isnt the play still going.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Let go! Let go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Let go! Im a tiny little woman!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Guys! Guys! Come on! Its Thanksgiving, its not importantwho wins or loses. The important thing is,  the Dutch girl picked me! Me! Notyou! Holland loves Chandler! Thank you, Amsterdam! Good night!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Ow!!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 We should defiantly play football more often. Maybe theres a likeleague we could join or something.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Isnt there a national football league.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Chandler	 Yes. Yes, there is, they play on Sundays and Monday nights.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Rachel	 Oh shoot! I work Monday nights.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Phoebe	 Umm, this stuffing is amazing. Do you think we should bring them some?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Joey	 When theyre hungry enough, theyll come in.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Let go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 No! You let go!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 No!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 How come its always us left in the field holding the ball?
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 I dont know. I guess the other people just dont care enough.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Hey! Its starting to snow.
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Ross	 Gimme the this!
03	09	0309	The One With The Football	Monica	 Let go!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Eh..., I dont, I dont know.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 What?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Well, as old as he is in dog years, do you think Snoopy should stillbe allowed to fly this thing?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 Rachel?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 Do you remember when you first came here, how you spent two weeksgetting trained by another waitress?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Oh, sure! Do you need me to train somebody new?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	  Good one. Actually, ah, Terry wants you to take the trainingagain, whenever.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	  Eh, do you believe that?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Yeah?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 So thats two boxes of the Holiday Macaroons. On behalf of the BrownBirds of America, I salute you. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Just admit it Chandler, you have no backhand.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Excuse me little one, I have a very solid backhand.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Shielding your face and shrieking like a girl... is not a backhand.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 I was shrieking... like a Marine.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 All right here. Watch me execute the three Ps of championshipplay. Power.  Precision.  and penache. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 You broke a little girls leg?!!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 I know. I feel horrible. Okay.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Says here that a muppet got whacked on SeasameStreet last night.  Where exactly were around ten-ish?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Well, Im gonna go see her. I want to bring her something, what doyou think shell like?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Maybe a Hello Kitty doll, the ability to walk...
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Im gonna get back to retraining. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 All right, see you guys. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Look out kids, hes coming! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 And I gotta go sell some Christmas trees.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Have fun. Oh wait, no, dont! I forgot I am totally against thatnow.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 What? Me having a job?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 No, no, I am against innocent trees being cut down in their prime, andtheir, their corpses grotesquely dressed in like tinsel and twinkly lights.  Hey,how do you sleep at night?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Well, Im pretty tired from lugging the trees around all day. Hey,Phoebe listen, you got this all wrong. Those trees were born to be Christmas trees, theirfulfilling their life purpose, by, by making people happy.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Really?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Yes. Yes, and ah, ah, the trees are happy too, because for most ofthem, its the only chance to see New York.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 ...and after youve delivered the drinks, you take the emptytray....
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Gunther, Gunther, please, Ive worked here for two and a halfyears, I know the empty trays go over there. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 What if you put them here. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Huh. Well, y'know thats actually a really good idea, because thatway theyll be closer to the mugs. Y'know what, you should have the other waitressesdo that too.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 They already do. Thats why they call it the trayspot.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Gee, I always heard them talk about that, I just always thought that itwas a club they went to. Oh God, Im, Im sorry. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 Its all right. Sweetheart.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 So, this must be kinda neat for ya, huh? I mean, your Dad tells me thatyou get a couple of days off school, and you, you ah, dont have to sell thosecookies anymore. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Well, I kinda wanted to sell the cookies. The girl who sells the mostwins a trip to Spacecamp, and gets to sit in a real space shuttle.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Wow, you ah, you really like all this space stuff, huh?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Yeah. My Dad says if I spend as much time helping him clean apartments,as I do daydreaming about outer space, hed be able to afford a trip to the TajMahal.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 I think you would have to clean a whole lot of apartments to go all theway to India.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 No. The one in Atlantic City, Dad loves the slots. He says hesgonna double the college money my Grandma left me.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Huh. Well, good luck to Dad. Say, how many more boxes would you have tosell in order to win?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 The girl who won last year sold four hundred and seventy-five.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Yeah.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 So far, Ive sold seventy-five.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Four hundred, huh? Well, that sounds do-able.  How much are the boxes?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Five dollars a box.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	  And what is second prize?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 A ten speed bike. But, Id rather have something my Dadcouldnt sell.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Well, that makes sense.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Could you do me one favor, if its not too much trouble?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Yeah, Sarah, anything.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Could you pull open the curtains for me? The astronauts from the spaceshuttle are gonna be on the news, and since we dont have a TV, the lady across thealley said shed push hers up to a window, so I could watch it.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 Yesss?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Hi, Im selling Brown Bird cookies.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 Youre no Brown Bird, I can see you through my peephole.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 No, hi, Im, Im an honorary Brown Bird 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 What does that mean?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Ah, well, it means that I can sell cookies, but Im not invited tosleep-overs.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 I can dial 9-1-1 at the touch of a button, y'know. Now, go away!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 No, please, please, um, its for a poor little girl who wants to goto Spacecamp more than anything in the world.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 Im pressing, a policeman is on his way.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Okay, okay! Im going. Im going. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Woman	 I can still see you!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 All right!!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	  Hey.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Hey. What, what are you doing here?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Well, I-I thought a lot about what you said, and um, I realilized duh,all right maybe I was a little judgmental. Yeah,  oh, but oh...
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Look now, Phoebe remember, hey, their just fulfilling their Christmas....
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Destiny.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Sure.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Yes.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 All right.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Okay.  Yikes!That one doesnt look very fulfilled.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Oh, thats, thats ah, one of the old ones, hes justtaking it to the back.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 You keep the old ones in the back, that is so ageist.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Well we have to make room for the fresh ones.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 So, what happens to the old guys?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Well, they go into the chipper.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Why, do I have a feeling thats not as happy as it sounds?  No! Nooooo!!! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	  Hey! Hey!! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 ...and these come in the shapes of your favourite Christmas characters,Santa, Rudolph, and Baby Jesus.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 All right, Ill take a box of the cream filled Jesuss.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Wait a minute, one box! Come on, Im trying to send a little girl toSpacecamp, Im putting you down for five boxes. Chandler, what about you?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Ahh, do you have any coconut flavoured deities?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 No, but ah, theres coconut in the Hanukkah Menoreoes. I tell youwhat, Ill put you down for eight boxes, one for each night.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Mon?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 All right, Ill take one box of the mint treasures, just one, andthats it. I-I started gaining weight after I joined the Brown Birds. Remember, how Dad bought all my boxes and I ate them all?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Ah, no Mon, Dad had to buy everyone of your boxes becauseyou ate them all. But ah, y'know Im sure thats not gonna happen this time, whydont I put you down for three of the mint treasures and just a couple of theRudolphs.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 No.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Oh, come on, now you know you want em.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Dont, dont, dont, dont, dont do this.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Ill tell you what Mon, Ill give you the first box for free.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	  Oh God! I gotta go! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Come on! All the cool kids are eating em! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 And when you have a second later, I wanna show you why we dontjust trap spiders under coffee mugs and leave them there.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	  Im training to be better at a jobthat I hate, my life officially sucks.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Look Rach, wasnt this supposed to a temporary thing? I thought youwanted to do fashion stuff?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Well, yeah! Im still pursuing that.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 How... exactly are you pursuing that? Y'know other than sending outresumes like what, two years ago?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Well, Im also sending out.... good thoughts.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 If you ask me, as long as you got this job, youve got nothingpushing you to get another one. You need the fear.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 The fear?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Hes right, if you quit this job, you then have motivation to goafter a job you really want.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Well then how come youre still at a job that you hate, I mean whydont you quit and get the fear?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Because, Im too afraid.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 I dont know, I mean I would give anything to work for a designer,y'know, or a buyer.... Oh, I just dont want to be 30 and still work here.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Yeah, thatd be much worse than being 28, and stillworking here.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 Rachel?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 Remind me to review with you which pot is decaf and which is regular.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Cant I just look at the handles on them?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 You would think.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Okay, fine. Gunther, y'know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you knowwhy Im a terrible waitress? Because, I dont care. I dont care. Idont care which pot is regular and which pot is decaf, I dont care where thetray spot is, I just dont care, this is not what I want to do. So I dont thinkI should do it anymore. Im gonna give you my weeks notice.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Gunther	 What?!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Gunther, I quit.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Does this mean were gonna have to start paying forcoffee? 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 ....and 12, 22, 18, four...  What?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 I spelled out boobies.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	  Ross,but me down for another box of the mint treasures, okay. Where, where are the minttreasures?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Ah, were out. I sold them all.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 What?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Monica, Im cutting you off.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 No. No, just, just, just a couple more boxes. It-it-its no bigdeal, all right, Im-Im cool. You gotta help me out with a couple more boxes!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Mon, look at yourself. You have cookie on your neck.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	  Oh God! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 So, how many have you sold so far?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Check this out. Five hundred and seventeen boxes!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Oh my God, how did you do that?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Okay, the other night I was leaving the museum just as LaserFloyd was letting out of the planetarium, without even trying I sold 50 boxes!Thats when it occurred to me, the key to my success, the munchies. So Iah, started hitting the NYU dorms around midnight. I am selling cookies by the case. Theycall me: 'Cookie Dude!'
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	  Okay, stop what youre doing, I need envelope stuffers,I need stamp lickers.....
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Well hey, who did these resumes for ya?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Me! On my computer.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Well you sure used a large font.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Eh, yeah, well ah, waitress at a coffee shop and cheer squadco-captain only took up so much room.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Hey-hey-hey thats funny! Your funny Chandler! Your a funny guy!You wanna know what else is really funny?!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Something else I might have said?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 I dont know, I dont know, werent you the guy that toldme to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Sweetie, calm down, its gonna be okay.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 No, its not gonna be okay Ross, tomorrow is my last day, and Idont have a lead. Okay, y'know what, Im just gonna, Im just gonna callGunther and Im gonna tell him, Im not quitting.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 You-you-you dont wanna give into the fear.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 You and your stupid fear. I hate your fear. I would like to take you andyour fear.... 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	  Hey! I got great news!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Run, Joey! Run for your life! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 What? Rachel, listen, have you ever heard of Fortunata Fashions?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 No.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Well my old man is doing a plumbing job down there and he heard they havean opening. So, you want me to see if I can get you an interview?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Oh my God! Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Not a problem.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Thanks.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 And now for the great news.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 What, that wasnt the great news?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Only if you think its better than this... snow-in-a-can!! I got it at work. Mon, you want me to decorate the window, give it a kindof Christmas lookie.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Christmas cookie?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Okay, and ah, this one here is a Douglas Fir, now its a little moremoney, but you get a nicer smell.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Guy	 Looks good. Ill take it.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	  Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! No, no, youdont want that one. No, you can have this cool brown one. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Guy	 Its-its-its almost dead!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Okay but thats why you have to buy it, so it can fulfil itsChristmas destiny, otherwise there gonna throw it into the chipper. Tell him, Joey
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Yeah, the ah, trees that dont fulfil their Christmas destiny arethrown in the chipper.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Guy	 I-I think Im gonna look around a little bit more.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	 Pheebs, you gotta stop this, I working on commission here.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	  Hey, guys. Im here to pick out my Christmas tree.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Well look no further,  this ones yours!Ahhh.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Is this the one that I threw out last year?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 All right y'know what, nevermind! Everyone wants to have a green one!Im sorry, Im sorry, I didnt mean to get so emotional, I guess itsjust the holidays, its hard.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Oh honey, is that cause your Mom died around Christmas?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Oh, I wasnt even thinking about that.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Monica	 Oh. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	  Hi there. How many, how many ah, did yousell?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Girl	 Im not gonna tell you! Youre the bad man who brokeSarahs leg.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Hey now! That was an accident, okay.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Girl	 Youre a big scrud.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Whats a scrud?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Girl	 Why dont you look in the mirror, scrud.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 I dont have too. I can just look at you.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Leader	 All right girls, and man. Lets see your final tallies.  Ohhhh, Debbie,  321 boxes of cookies,  Very nice.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	  Not nice enough.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Leader	 Charla, 278. Sorry, dear, but still good.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	  Good for a scrud.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Leader	 Oh, yes Elizabeth. Ah, 871.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Thats crap!! Sister Brown Bird.  Good going. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Leader	 Whos next? 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Hi there!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Leader	 Hi. And batting for Sarah, Ross Geller, 872. Although, it looks like youbought an awful lot of cookies yourself.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Um, that is because my doctor says that I have a very serious....nuget.... diffency.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Tell us what happened, Brown Bird Ross.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Well, I lost. Some little girl loaned her uniform to her nineteen year oldsister, who went down to the U.S.S. Nimitz, and sold over 2,000 boxes.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Hey! Howd the interview go?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Oh, I blew it. I wouldnt of even hired me.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Oh, come here sweetie, listen, youre gonna go on like a thousandinterviews before you get a job.  Thats not how that was supposedto come out.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 This is the worst Christmas ever.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Y'know what Rach, maybe you should just, y'know stay here at thecoffee house.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 I cant! Its too late! Terry already hired that girl overthere.  Look at her, shes even got waitress experience. Last nightshe was teaching everybody how to make napkin....  swans.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 That word was swans.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Well seeing that drunk Santa wet himself, really perked up myChristmas.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh my God!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey, Monica	  Merry Christmas!!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 You saved them! You guys! Oh God, youre the best!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Its like Night of the Living Dead Christmas Trees.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	  Hello?  Yeah, this is she.  Oh!Youre kidding! Youre kidding!  Oh thank you! I love you!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Sure, everybody loves a kidder.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	  I got the job!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	All	 Thats great! Hey! Excellent!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Phoebe	 Oh, God bless us, everyone.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Here we go. Im serving my last cup of coffee.  There you go.  Enjoy. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	  Should I tell her I ordered tea?
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 No. 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Rachel	 Um, excuse me, everyone. Ah, this is my last night working here, and Iah, just wanted say that I made some really good friends working here, and ah, itsjust time to move on. Ah, and no offence to everybody who ah, still works here, you have no idea how good itfeels to say that as of this moment I will never have to make coffee again.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	RachelS Boss	 Now Mr. Kaplan Sr. likes his coffee strong, so your gonnause two bags instead of one, see. Now pay attention, cause this parts tricky,see some people use filters just once.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Im, Im sorry you didnt get to go to Spacecamp, andIm hoping that maybe somehow, this may make up for it. Presenting SarahTuttles Private Very Special Spacecamp!! 
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Sarah	 Really Mr. Geller, you dont have to do this.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Oh come on! Here we go!  Stand byfor mission countdown!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Joey	  Ten, ten.., nine, nine, nine....,eight, eight, eight...  Okay, Blast off!
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Chandler	 Im an alien. Im an alien.
03	10	0310	The One Where Rachel Quits	Ross	 Oh no! An asteroid! 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Okay, pick a card, any card.  All right, now memorizeit. Show to everybody. Got it?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Um-mm.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 All right, give it back to me.  5 of hearts.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Real magic does exist.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Wow.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Wow. Joey,  how do you do it?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 I cant tell you that, no.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Ah, somebodys at the door on the ceiling.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Noo, thats our unbelievably loud upstairs neighbor.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 He took up the carpet, and now you can hear everything.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Why dont you go up there and ask him to step lightly,please?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I have like five times, but the guy is so charming, that I go up thereto yell and then I end up apologizing to him.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Ooh, that is silly.  Ill go up there, Ill tell himto keep it down.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 All right, be my guest.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Good luck.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 All right, all right, all right, all right, all right, you really wannaknow how I did it, Ill show ya. When you handed me back the card, what youdidnt see was, I looked at it so fast that it was invisible to the naked eye.  I just did it.  I just did it, again.Here, Ill slow it down so that you guys can see it. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	All	 Oh, I got it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	  Yeah, look I was with my friend downstairsand we hear everything up here that you do, and I am sick and tired... .
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	  Whoa, you are very beautiful.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	  Oh, thank you.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Hey, anybody got a length of rope about six feet long witha little nouse at the end?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Honey, whats the matter?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 I just saw Janice. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	All	 Oh.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Yeah, she was at Rockefeller Center skating with her husband, shelooked so happy. I almost feel bad for whipping that kids pretzel at them.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Man, I remember the first time I saw that girl Katherine, after we brokeup. She was just walking with her friend Donna, just laughing and talking. God, it killedme.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Yes, but you ended up having sex with both of them that afternoon.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Sorry, I just, any excuse to tell that story y'know....
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hey Chandler, theres a party tomorrow, youll feel better then.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Oh, y'know what, Im gonna be okay, you dont have to throwa party for me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Its Joeys birthday.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Oh, well then, if anybody should have a party it should be him.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Sush!! I cannot believe she is still up there.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Okay, well he totally screwed up the punch line. Y'know, itssupposed to be arrghh-eh og-errigh.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	  Hows that coffee comin, dear?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Yeah, right away Mr. Kaplan.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	 Im not supposed to drink coffee, it makes me gassy.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I know!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	 Ill bet your thinking, Whats an intelligent girlwho wants to be in fashion, doing making coffee? Eh?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Op.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	 Eh.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh, you got me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	 Well, dont think I havent noticed your potential. Well,Ive got a project for you thats a lot more related to fashion. How does thatsound?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh, that sounds great.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	 Come on over here, sweetheart. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh thank you so much Mr. Kaplan, thank you so much.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mr. Kaplan	  I need these hangers separated ASAP.  Youre welcome.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh God, I hate my job, I hate it, I hate my job, I hate it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I know honey, Im sorry.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh, I wanna quit, but then I think I should stick it out, then I thinkwhy would such a person stay in such a demeaning job, just because its remotelyrelated to the field theyre interested in.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	  Gee, I dont know Rach. Order up!! I got aYentel soup, a James Beans, and a Howdy hold the Dowdy!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh honey, come on, Im sorry, I didnt.... I dont mindpaying my dues, y'know, its just how much am I gonna learn about fashion by walking Mira,the arthritic seamstress, to the bathroom.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Hi! Is my misery amusing to you?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	 Im sorry, I wa, I wa, I was just ah.... 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Its not funny, this is actually my job.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	 Oh believe me, I-I-Ive been there. I had to sort mannequin heads atthat Mannequins Plus.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh well then, so Im just going to go back to talking to my friendhere. And you can go back to enjoying your little hamburger.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	 Ah, just one other thing.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yes?!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	 I ah, I work at Bloomingdales and I might know of a jobpossibility if your, if your interested?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	   Do you want my pickle?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Gunther	  Hey guys.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Hey Gunther. Hi.  I mean youre going out on a date withthe noisy guy upstairs?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Well, hes very charming.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I know, hes too charming, but if you two start going out, thenits just gonna make it so much harder for me to hate him.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Well, youre just gonna have to try.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Joey, where are the Jell-o shots?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 I dont know, Chandler is supposed to be passin emaround...
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Chandler!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Hello-dillillio!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Oh, somebodys feeling better.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	  Stick out your tongue.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Take off your shirt!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Oh my!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Oh my God! How many of these things did you have? These are pure vodka.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Yeah, Jell-o just like Mom used to make.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  The most unbelievable thing happened to me today.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hi!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Hi! So Im out having lunch at Monicas and this guy startstalking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdales andthere happens to be an opening in his department. So I gave him my phone number andhes gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Wow!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I know!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 What, so this guy is helping you for no apparent reason?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Uh-huh!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 And hes, hes a total stranger?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah! His name is um, Mark something.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Huh. Sounds like Mark Something wants to have some sex.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 What!?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Well, Im just saying, I mean why else would he just, y'know, swoopin out of nowhere for no reason.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 To be nice.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hey, Joey. Are men ever nice to strange women for no reason?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 No, only for sex.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Thank you.  So did you ah, did you tell Mark Something aboutme?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I didnt have to, because I was wearing my I heart Rosssandwich board and ringing my bell.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Uh-huh.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sisters	  Joey!!! Happy Birthday!! 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Hey!! Hey-hey-hey!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Okay, how many of that girl are you seeing?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 How hammered are you? Huh? These, these are Joeys sisters.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Hi Joeys sisters!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	  Hey!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Cookie	 Hey. What are we drinkin over here.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Well, I have ah, vodka and cranberry juice.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Cookie	 No kiddin, thats the exact same drink I made myself rightafter I shot my husband.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Wow. Okay, I dont know how to talk to you.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Sister 1	  What cha doing?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Oh, Im taking my ex-girlfriend of my speed dialer.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sisters	 Oh!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, no, its a good thing. Why must we dial so speedilyanyway? Why must we rush through life? Why cant we savor the precious moments?  Those are some huge breasts you have.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hi.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Hi.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Yeah. So um, I-I heard about this ah, Mark guy that ah, Rachel met today.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Isnt that great?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Oh yeah! So ah, kinda pretty, pretty good. He sounds like a nice, goodguy.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Oh, he is. And he is so dreamy. I mean, y'know what, when he left Iactually used the phrase, Hummina-hummina-hummina. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Thats excellent.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	  So, hes just a nice guy. You really think this Markdoesnt want anything in exchange for helping him?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Well, I assume Ill have to take showers with him, but y'know,thats true of any job.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 How ya feelin?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Well, my apartment isnt there anymore, because I drank it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Whered you get too? We lost you after you opened up all thepresents.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Yeah.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Yeah, I ended up in the storage room, and not alone.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	All	 Woooo hoooo!!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Ow, no woo-hooing, no woo-hooing. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Why, what happened?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Ah, I fooled around with Joeys sister.  Well,thats not the worst part. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 What is the worse part?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 I cant remember which sister.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	  You see what men do! Dont tell me men are not nice! This is men!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Are you insane? I mean Joey, is going to kill you, hes actuallygoing to kill you dead.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Okay! You dont think I thought of that?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 How can you not know which one?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I mean thats unbelievable.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I mean, was it Gina?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Which one is Gina?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Dark, big hair, with the airplane earrings.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 No, no, no, thats Dina.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  You see you cant tell which one is which either,dwha!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 We didnt fool around with any of them. Dwha! Dwha!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Veronica. Look, its got to be Veronica, the girl in the redskirt. I definitely stuck my tongue down her throat.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 That was me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Look, when Ive been drinking, sometimes I tend to get overlyfriendly, and Im sorry.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Thats okay.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Thats all right.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Thats okay.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	  Can I talk to you for a second?!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hey, Joey.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Hey. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Come on!! 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Why cant we talk in here? With, with, witnesses.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 I just got off the phone with my sister.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Ah, which, which one?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Yeah.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Y'know which one was she again?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Why dont you ask Chandler, cause hes the one that fooledaround with her. She told me you said you could really fall for her. Now is thattrue? Or are you just gettin over Janice by groping my sister. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Its gotta be the first one.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Really? Thats great! You and my sister, sittin in a tree.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Yep, Im in a tree.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Did he call? Did Mark call?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 No honey, Im sorry, but the weekends not over yet.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh.  Oh my God, is thatPhoebe?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I guess theyre back from their date.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Music. Very nice.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Oh my God!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 So, how are you?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I am good. I finished my book.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh yeah, whats it about?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I dont remember. Do you wanna take a walk?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah, I do. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Dear Mary-Angela. Hi. Hows it going. This is the hardest letterIve ever had to write.  What the hells a matter with you? How doyou think Joeys going to react when he finds out that you blew off his sister with aletter?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Well, thats the part where you tell him that I moved to France.When actually Ill be in Cuba.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 All right, look, look, youve got to do this yourself, okay inperson. At least you know her name. You just go to the house and you ask for Mary-Angela,okay, when which ever one she is comes to the door, you take her for a walk, you let herdown easy.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 What if Mary-Angela comes to the door and I ask for Mary-Angela?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Where in Cuba?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Joey, what-wh-wh-wha-wh-wha-wh-wha-wh-wha-what are you doinghere?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Waiting for my Grandma to finish my laundry. What about you?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Im here to see Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 You are so the man!  Now look,listen, listen, you got to be cool, cause my Grandma doesnt know about you twoyet, and you do not want to tick her off. She was like the sixth person to spit onMussolini's hanging body. Yeah.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Wheres Mary-Angela?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Shes right in there. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sisters	 Hey, Chandler!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I cant believe Mark didnt call. Its Sunday night, andhe didnt call.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Bummer.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Yeah, right. Look at you, youre practically giddy.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 No, Im genuinely sorry the Mark thing didnt work out. Look,Rach, I want only good things for you.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Wait a minute, why dont you just call Mark.  I mean, who says you have to sit here and wait for him, youve got to makestuff happen.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 But, you, you dont want to seem too pushy.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	  Honey, its not pushy, he gave her his home number.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	  What, he gave you his home number? Asin like, to, to his home?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah, and you dont mind if I call, because you only want goodthings for me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Thats right good things, that-that is what I said. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Hello, Mark? Hi, its Rachel Green.  Oh no,dont you apologize.  Yeah, Ill hold.  He left mynumber at work, but he was helping his niece with her report on the pioneers.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 That is so made up!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Yeah, oh my God, tomorrow! That, no, its perfect. OhGod, thank you soo much. Great! Bye!  I got the interview!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Yay!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 There you go.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 He even offered to meet me for lunch tomorrow to prep me for it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Oh, that is amazing!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Yeah well, if I know Mark, and I think I do, Id expect nothing less.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I got to figure out what Im going to wear.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 High collar and baggy pants say Im a pro.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah! Right! Okay, Ill see you guys later.  Woohoo!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 You go get em.  What did I do to you? Did I hurt you insome way?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 What?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Why dont you call him?! Well, thank you very much!Y'know now he is going to prep her, y'know prep her, as in what you do when you surgicallyremove the boyfriend!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Are you crazy?!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Am I! Am I! Am I out of my mind! Am I losing my senses!! This dreamy guyis taking my girlfriend out for a meal.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 What?! Ross y'know this isnt even about you! I mean this is aboutRachel and something wonderful happening for her. I mean you know even if youreright, what if he wants to sleep with her, does it mean he gets too?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 No.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 I mean dont you trust her?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Well, yeah!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Then get over yourself! Grow up!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	  You grow up.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 This teramisu is, is excellent. Did you make it Mary-Angela?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Grandmother	 No! I did!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Well, its, its yummy. So Mary-Angela do you like it?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Grandmother	 Of course! Its her favorite.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 So um, Mary-Angela, whats your second favorite?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Grandmother	 More of Grandmas teramisu.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Would you just please....give me the receipt cause this isgreat. Its top notch.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Grandmother	 That dies with me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 So will I.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	 Excuse yourself, and go to the bathroom.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no I was just squinting. That doesnt mean anything.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	  Just do it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Will you excuse me I have to um..... 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Hey!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	 Finally, I thought wed never be alone. Can I just tellyou something, I have not stopped thinking about you since the party. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Look, I may have jumped the gun here.  Um, I just got out of a relationship and Im not really ina, in a commitment kind of place.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	 So! Me neither! God, Mary-Angela was right you do have thesoftest lips.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Ahhhh, youre not Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	 No, Im Mary-Theresa.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 This is so bad. If-if youre not Mary-Angela, then-then who is?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mary-Angela	  I am!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Oh, this is soo bad. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mary-Angela	 Joey!!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 No Joey! No Joey! Dont Joey! Joey!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Whats goin on?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	  Youre it! Now run and hide!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mary-Theresa	 Its no big deal. Chandler was just kissin me becausehe thought I was Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 What?! How could you do that, how could you think she was Mary-Angela?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 I wasnt sure which one Mary-Angela was.  Look, Im sorry okay, I was really drunk, and you all look reallysimilar.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	JoeyS Sister	 I say, punch him Joey.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	All	 Yeah! Punch him!!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Y'know what, we should all calm down because your brothers notgoing to punch me.  Are ya?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Well, that is usually what I would do. But I just never thought youdbe on the receiving end of it. How could you do this?!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Joey if you wanna punch me, go ahead, I deserve it. But I just wantyou to know that I would never soberly hurt you or your family, youre my bestfriend. I would never do anything like this ever again.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Cookie	 So what. I say, punch him.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	All	 Yeah! Punch him! Punch him!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 No! No! No! No, Im not going to punch Chandler.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Cookie	 Ill do it.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 No you wont. Look he knows he did a terrible thing and I believehim, hes sorry. But,  youve got one more apology to make, allright, youve got to apologize to Mary-Angela.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Okay, absolutely!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 All right.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Youve got it. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 Cookie, now you can punch him!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 What?! 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Hey!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hi!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 What are you doing here?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Ah y'know, this building is on my paper route so I... 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Hi. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Hi.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Howd did it go?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh well, the woman I interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thankGod Mark coached me, because once I started talking about the fall line, she got all happyand wouldnt shut up.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Im so proud of you.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Me too!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Listen, Im ah, Im sorry Ive been so crazy and jealousand, its just that I like you a lot, so...
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 I know.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Yeah.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mark	 Rachel?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Yeah.  Hi Mark!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mark	 Hi. I just talked to Joanna, and she loves you. You got it, you got thejob.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Oh, I did!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Mark	 Yes.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	  Oh my God!! 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Congratu!!  -lations-lations.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 So ah, Phoebe, how was your date?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Oh well y'know. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Yeah, I do know.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Ick, you were eavesdropping.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Eavesdropping. Pheebs, the ceiling tiles were falling down.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Oh, Im sorry. But I really like this guy. And I think he reallyhappens to like me.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Maybe hes just jumping on a pogo-stick and really likes it?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Maybe the pogo-stick likes it too?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Joey	 All right, thats it! He cannot do this to Phoebe.  This guyis going to get the butt kicking of a lifetime! But, is he a big guy?
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Ross	 Ah, well all go.  Come on. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 Thanks you guys! Thank you.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Chandler	 Dont worry.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Phoebe	 God, I hope they kick his ass!
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Rachel	 Honey, Im sorry.
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Monica	 Y'know if its any consolation, he really did sound like he washaving more fun with you. 
03	11	0311	The One Where Chandler Can't Remember Which Sister	Guy	  May I help you?
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	  Okay. Hey. Umm. Doeseverybody hate these shoes? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Oh yeah, but don't worry. I don't think anybody's gonna focus on thatas long as your wearing that towel dress. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	  Tell him. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	  It's her first day at this new job. Your not supposed tostart with her! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 All right, I suppose I can wait a day. Hey, what are you doing Friday?
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Why? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 I need you to come to this bachelor party for my weird cousin Albert,y'know he's the botanist. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Oh God. Y'know, botanists are such geeks. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Yeah. Is that a dinosaur tie? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Hmm? Oh, yeah.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	  Morning. Rach,I'm here with the purses! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	  It must take you forever to find your keys. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	  Thank you, thank you, thank you, Pheebs. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Your welcome, oh please not the one with the turtles. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 No, no, no, no turtles scare me. I don't need that today. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Honey, just relax, it's gonna be fine. Hey, umm,. why don't I come downthere and I'll take you out to lunch? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh honey, thank you, but Mark's taking me out. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Mark is that ah, the same Mark that helped you get the job? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Yeah, it's kinda like a 'good luck on your first day' sort of thing.  Is this actually a lunchbox? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Umm, no, it's a purse. And there's a thermos in it. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	  Hey, so can you make it on Friday? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 What? Oh yeah, yeah I think so. Why am I invited to this again? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Well apparently Albert has no friends. He's very excited about thebachelor party though. I think actually the only reason he's getting married is so he cansee a stripper. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 A stripper at a bachelor party, that is so cliché. Why don't you get amagician?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Well, if the magician can open my beer with his but cheeks, then allright. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 She's having lunch with him. She's having lunch with him. And you shouldof seen the hug she gave him when she got the job. And, and, and,  he's reallygood looking.  What am I gonna do? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Don't do anything. Keep it inside. Learn how to hide your feelings! Don't cry outloud. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	  Yes! Guess who's in an audition for a Broadwaymusical? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 I want to say you but, that seems like such an easy answer. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 It is me! It's a musical version of Tale of Two Cities. So I thinkI'm gonna sing New York, New York, and ah, oh I left My Heart in San Francisco.
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Ah Joey, I don't think you get to pick the cities. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 What? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Mr. Dickens gets to pick 'em. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Who? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 I'll get you the Cliff Notes. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 The what? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 The abridgment. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Oh, okay.  The what? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 ...and the style number, and the invoice number, and the shipping date.Good. Any questions so far? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Yeah. What kind of discount do we get? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Twenty percent. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh!! I love this job!  Wow! My first call. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Here, let me.  Rachel Green's line, how may I help you? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	  Hi, is Rachel there? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 And who may I say is calling? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 This is Ross? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Ross of..... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Of Ross and Rachel. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Oh hi. It's, it's Mark. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Oh hey, hey Mark. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Hey, hold on a second. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Okay. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Hi honey! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Hi! What's ah, what's Mark doing answering your phone? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh, he's just goofing around. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Ohhhhh yeah, that's, that's funny. Why ah, why isn't he goofing around inhis own office? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh honey, this is his office too. I told you we're Joanna's twoassistants. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Why does Joanna need two assistants, how, how lazy is she? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh! Oh my God! What did I just do? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 What? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 I think I just shipped 3,000 bras to personnel. Oh honey, I gotta go. Mark, I need you! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Okay, bye-bye.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Ow! Ross!! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Oh, oh, I'm, I'm, I'm sorry sweetie, I was just trying to ah, I'm dialinganother number.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Jeannine	  All right, I just got changed in thirty seconds so you canbe alone with him. You'd better go for it. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Please, I'm not going for anything. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Jeannine	 Well, if you don't, I will. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Would you please go? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Jeannine	 Night Mon. Night Julio. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	  Adios. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Look Julio, someone left their book here. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Ah actually, that is mine. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Oh yeah, what are you reading? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Flowers of Evil, by Beaudalire. Have you read it? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Have I read it?  No, are you enjoying it? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 I thought I would, but the translation's no good. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Your a poet and don't know it.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Actually I ah, I am a poet. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Oh, then you do know it.  So um what kind of things do you writeabout? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Things that move me. The, the shadow of a tree, a child laughing, or thislip.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Mine?  Right here? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 I can write an epic poem about this lip.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 How would that go?  Well, it didn't rhyme, but I liked it. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	  You've got to pick a pocket or two. Boyyyyssss,  you've got to pick a pocket or two.......... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Lovely, just lovely. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Really? Thanks. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Listen Joey, we definitely want to see you for the callback onSaturday. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Excellent, I'll be there. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Okay, and listen don't forget to bring your jazz shoes for the danceaudition. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Ahhh! My ah, my agent said it wasn't a dancing part. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Joey, all the roles got to dance a little. But believe me with yourdance background it'll be a piece of cake. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 ....three years of modern dance with Twila Tharp! Five years with theAmerican Ballet Theater?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Hey, everybody lies on their resume, okay. I wasn't one of the Zoom Kidseither. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Well, can you dance at all? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Yeah, I can dance, y'know.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Oh no, no, no, no. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	  What, what is that? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Sure, it looks stupid now, there's no music playing. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 All right, I have to get that, but no-no.  Hello?  Hi! Yeah listen, I'm, I'm in need of a stripper and I was told thatyou do that.  Let me ask you this, what, what do you do for the extra hundred? So would I, would I have to provide the grapes? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	  Hi! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Oh, how was last night with Julio, senorita? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 It was soo amazing, he is so sexy, and smart, which makes him evensexier. Oh gosh, I gotta so you this. Last night, we were fooling around and he stops towrite a poem. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Get out! I couldn't stop if a meteor hit me. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Okay, we have our stripper. A miss Crystal Chandelier. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Well sure, you name a kid that, what do you expect them to grow up to be? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Anyway um, when he left he forgot to take the poem with him. Now, I amlike totally dense about poetry, but I think it's pretty good all right. Check it out. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	  The Empty Vase. Translucent beauty... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 To yourself.  Hey-hey-hey, y'know what that's pretty good. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Oh good, I think so too. Pheebs? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Oh yeah. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Oh, I'm so glad you guys like it. Yay! All right I gotta go to work. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Whoa, I'm not done. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 All right, just give it back to me when your done. See you guys. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Bye-bye. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Oh my God, oh my God! Poor Monica! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 What, what, what?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 What?! He was with her when he wrote this poem. Look,  'Myvessel so empty with nothing inside. Now that I've touched you, you seem emptier still.'He thinks Monica is empty, she is the empty vase! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 You really think that is what he meant? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Oh, totally. Oh, God, oh, she seemed so happy too. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Done. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	  Do you have the, the Ralph Lauren file? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm...  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Wh-what's that? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 It's from Ross, it's a love bug. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Wow! Somebody wants people to know you have a boyfriend. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh no, no-no-no, that's not, not, not, what he is doing. He's just, he'sjust really romantic. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Man	  Ah, excuse me, are you Rachel Green? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Yes. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Man	  One, two, three... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Quartet	  Congratulations on your first week at your brand new job! Itwon't be long before your the boss. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	The Bass Barber	 Omm-pah, omm-pah, omm-pah. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Quartet	  And you know who will be there to support... you?! Your oneand only boyfriend... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	The Bass Barber	 It's nice to have a boyfriend. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Quartet	 Your loyal loving boyfriend Ross..... Ross! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I'm hurt! I'm actually hurt, that you would think that I would send youany of those things out of any thing other than love. Hurt! Hurt! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 All right Ross!! I get it!! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I mean my God... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 You're hurt! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 ...can't, can't a guy send a barbershop quartet to his girlfriend's officeanymorrrrre!! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! It was like you were marking yourterritory. I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I would never do that! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. Hesaid this is what you guys do. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Yeah well if, if, if Mark said that, than Mark's an idiot. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Mark's a genius! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Why?! How?! How is he a genius? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Look, don't you see what's happening here. Instead of hitting on herright away, he's becoming her confidant. Now he's gonna be the guy she goes too tocomplain about you. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 What am I going to do? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Well, why don't you send her a musical bug, op, no you already didthat. All right look, you're going to have to go there yourself now, okay, make a fewsurprise visits. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I don't know you guys. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 All right fine, don't do anything, just sit here and talk to us,meanwhile she is talking to him about you. And he's being Mr. Joe Sensitive, and shestarts thinking 'Maybe this is the guy for me, because he understands me.' 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 And before you know it, she's with him. And you'll be all, 'Ohh, man!' Andhe'll be all, 'Yes!' And us, we'll be like, 'Wh-whoa, dude.' And pretty soon you'll belike,  'Hhiii,' and, and, and, 'I can't go, Rachel and Mark might be there.' Andwe'll be like, 'Man get over it, it's been four years!!' 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 He paints quite a picture doesn't he? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Woman	  Here's the Shelly Siegal stuff from December. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	  And wait, I've got something for you.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Woman	 Mark!! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 It's okay, Rachel knows. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Woman	 Yeah, but even soo. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 I can't help it, I'm just, I'm just crazy about you. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Ohhh! That is soo sweet!  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 Okay, okay look, I know I'm being Mr. Inappropriate today, but it's justso tough, I mean see you walking around and I just wanna touch you and hold you, come onno one's around, just, just kiss me. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 All right that's, that's it!! Get off her! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Mark	 What is going on? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 What's going on?!  That's what's going on!! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	  Ross! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I have been down in your store for twenty minutes trying to get a tie!What do I have to do to get some service?!  Hi Rach.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Ah Joey. Joey Tribbiani. Listen Joey, I got a problem, I just got acall from my dance captain, he's having a relationship crisis and can't get out of LongIsland. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 So, does that mean the audition is off? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Listen Joey, seeing as you've got the most experience, I want you totake these dancers and show them the combination. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 What?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Aw come on Joey, it's easy. Y'know, it's hand, hand, head, head,  up, pas de bouree, pas de bouree, big turn here, grandsissone, sissone, sissone, slide back, step, step, step, and jazz hands! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 It's ah, step-ity, step and jazz hands. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Have fun. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 Bye.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	  Hey! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Hey. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 What are you wrapping? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Oh-ho, look what I got Julio. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's a vase. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Yeah, just like the one in the poem. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Well not exactly like the one in the poem. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 What do you mean? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Phoebe	 Remember how you said you were really dense about poetry? Oh. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	  So! I'm just an empty vase, huh? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 What? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 Y'know, so I don't read as many important books as you do, and I don'twrite trick poems that seem to be about one thing but are actually about something else.And y'know what, I get excited about stupid stuff, like when I my People magazinecomes on Saturday, and the new Hold Everything catalog. Y'know but that does notmean that I'm empty, I care about things. I care about my friends and family. You have noright to make that kind of judgment about me. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Whoa, whoa, whoa. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 You don't even know me... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 Whoa, whoa, whoa, the poem is not about you. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 What? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 The Empty Vase is not about you. My baby, you make me so sad that youwould think this. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	 I'm sorry, my friend Phoebe... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	 No, it's about all women. Well, all American women. You feel better now? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Monica	  Oh yeah. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 All right, let's do it! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 No, no, no. What was that? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 I know, it was the best I could get out of them. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Well, people! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Joey	 People, people, people. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Director	 Let's try it again, and this time let's watch everybody watch Joey. Show 'em how it's done.  Count it off. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 So ah, did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Oh yeah, yeah! Look what I got, look what I got.  See,she's fully dressed, right? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Right. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 And then you click it and, uh-oh, she's naked. And then, and then youclick it again and she's dressed. She's a business woman, she's walking down the street,she's window shopping, and  whoa-whoa-whoa, sh-she's naked!  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	  Hi. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Hello. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Y'know what, I'm, I'm gonna spend some alone time with the pen. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	  I'm sorry, I was an idiot. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 A big idiot. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 A big idiot. Just you have to realize is, this whole Mark thing is kindahard for me. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Honey, why is it hard, I mean we've been together for almost a year now?
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Well, I was with Carol for like eight years and I lost her. And now ifit's possible I think I love you even more. So, it's hard for me to believe that I'm notgonna, well that someone else is not going to take you away. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Gunther	 Let it be me! Let it be me! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two peoplelove each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 I gotta get going. Bye Chandler. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Oh, okay Ross. Listen, this pen is kinda getting boring, so can youpick me up some porn? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Where ya going? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Oh, I've got to go pick up Ben, we've got a play date this afternoon. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Ohh, with who? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Oh, just this woman that I met last night at the party. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 There was a woman at the...  The stripper?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Yeah. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 You have a play date with a stripper?! 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Man, I gotta get a kid.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Ah, yeah, yeah. Umm, we started talking after she y'know, did her thing.And it turns out she's got a boy about Ben's age, so we're taking them to a gym-boreeclass. Why, is that okay? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Sure, is she married? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Ahh, no. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Oh.  
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Are you jealous? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Noo, I y'know I don't see why she has to play with you, that's all. Imean doesn't she have any y'know other stripper moms friends of her own? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 You are totally jealous. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 I'm not jealous. All right this is about, umm, people feeling certainthings y'know about strippers. And y'know, and um, I... 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Honey, I love you too. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	 Ugh. Wait, wait, wait. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 What? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Ross	 Huh. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Rachel	  Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple ofhours, y'know. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Chandler	 Yeah. Either that, or you just turned him on and sent him off to astripper. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Man	  Is there a Julio here? 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Julio	  I am Julio. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Man	  Mister Pretensous,  you thinkthere's no one finer, well but your poems are unpublished, and you work in a diner. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Quartet	 Your no God's gift to women, that's all in your headdddd. You are justa buttmunch. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Bass Singer	 No one likes a buttmunch. 
03	12	0312	The One With All The Jealousy	Quartet	 And your also bad in bedd-edd-edd!. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  Hi.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Clerk	 Six dollars, please.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Six? I just had it for one night. Its three.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Clerk	 Eight oclock is the cut-off and,  aww,its 8:02.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Y'know in a weird way, you have too much power. Look, youre gonnahave to help me out here, cause I only have three.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	  I can help with that.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh my God. Richard?  Hi!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Hi!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Wow! Your lip went bald.  Hey, thanks.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 So, you look great.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Right.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 No you do. You... just...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 What?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Youve got panties stuck to your leg.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  Thats because I-I was just grabbing some things outof the dryer, and its static cling. Or maybe its just that God knew Idbe running into you and saw an opportunity.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Its good to see you.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Its good to see you too.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 You see that guy? Hes in classics now, but y'know as soon as weleave hes going straight to the porn.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Hes gonna go up to the counter with Citizen Kane, Vertigo,and Clockwork Orgy.  This is nice.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Yeah.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 I missed this.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Me too.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 So, you wanna get a hamburger or something?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh, um, I dont know if thats a good idea.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Oh. Look, just friends, I wont grope you. I promise.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 No, I just I think that its too soon.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 No its not too soon, I had lunch at a eleven.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Yeah, baby!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 What are you doing?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Making chocolate milk. Do you want some?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 No thanks. Im 29.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	  Oh my God, I gotta go to work!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Oh sweetie, when do you think youre going to get off tonight?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Oh I dont know honey. Its gonna be really late.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Oh come on, not again.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 I know. Im sorry. Look, Ill make a deal with you all right?Okay?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Hmm.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 For every night that youre asleep before I get home from work...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Yeah.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 I will wake you up in a way thats proved very popular in the past.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Now, if you need to stay late, I want to be supportive of that.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Right.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	  Hi.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	All	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	  Look at you. Since when do you roller blade?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Oh! Since tomorrow. I met this really cute guy in the park and he likey'know, jogs, and blades, and swims, and so y'know we made a deal thats hesgoing to teach me all sorts of jock stuff.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 And what are you going to do for him?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Im going to let him.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Cool.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  Morning.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	All	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Somebody got in late last night.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Yeah well, I ran into Richard. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 When did this happen?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh, um, around 8:02. We ah, talked for a little while, and then um, wewent out for an innocent burger.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Oh, theres no such thing as an innocent burger.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 So, are you gonna see him again?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Tomorrow night.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Monica, what are you doing?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Well, she spent the last six months getting over him, and nowshes celebrating that by going on a date with him.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Its not a date, okay. Im just gonna teach him how to makelasagne for some pot luck dinner he has.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Well, you might wanna make a little extra, y'know youll probably behungry after the sex.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Were not gonna have sex! Okay, nothings changed here. Hestill doesnt want children and I still do, so thats why were just gonnabe friends.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Naked friends.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	  Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Do you have any ice?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Check the freezer. If theres none in there, then were probablyout. Are you just getting in from work? Its late.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Yeah, I know. I had the greatest day though, I got to sit in on themeeting with the reps from Calvin Klien. I told my boss I liked this line oflingerie, she ordered a ton of it. How was your day?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 I discovered Im able to count all of my teeth using just my tongue.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Hmm.  Umm, why do you have a copy of TheShining in your freezer?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Oh, I was reading it last night, and I got scared, so.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 But ah, youre safe from it if its in the freezer?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Well, safer. Y'know, I mean I never start reading The Shining,without making sure weve got plenty of room in the freezer, y'know.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 How often do you read it?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Havent you ever read the same book over and over again?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Well, umm, I guess I read Little Women more than once. But I meanthats a classic, whats so great about The Shining?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 The question should be Rach, what is not so great about TheShining. Okay? And the answer would be: nothing. All right? This is like the scariestbook ever. I bet its way better than that classic of yours.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Okay. Ah, well well just see about that, okay. I will read TheShining,  and you will read Little Women. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 All right, you got it.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 All right.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Ah, now Rach, these ah, these little women.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 How little are they? I mean, are they like scary little?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Um, Chandler, Ross, this is Robert.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Oh, hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Hi.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	  Youve have lipstick right here .Thats okay, its mine, we just kissed.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Oh.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	  So ah, isnt a bit cold out for shorts?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Well, Im from California.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Right, right. Sometimes you guys just burst into flames.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	  Im up! Im up, Ive gotten up now!Anybody ah, want anything?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Ill have coffee.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Yeah, me too.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Yeah, make that three.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Okay Ross, why dont you come with me?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Okay.   What ah, what is the matterwith you? Whats going on?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Roberts coming out.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 What, what do you mean, what? Is he gay?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 No. He.....hes coming out of his shorts.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 What?!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 The man is showing brain.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Are you sure?  Hold on. Im sorry you guys, that was a coffee and a....
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Coffee.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 We could write it down for you?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 No, no, that wont be ah, that wont be necessary  
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	  Wellll?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, yeah!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 What do we do? What do we do?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Well, I suppose we just try to not look directly at it.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Like an eclipse.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 So when people complement me on my cooking should I, what do I say?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 You say Thank you very much, and then you buy me somethingpretty. Come on, were gonna put are hands in this bowl, and were gonna startsquishing the tomatoes.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Ew, this feels very weird.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 You touch peoples eyeballs every day and this feels weird.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Yeah, well, sure I touch them, but I spent years learning not to squishthem.  Thats my hand.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oops.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Gotta keep squishing.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Tomatoes are squishing.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Op.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh, gosh, you got some on your shirt. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Yeah.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Hold on a second, just put a little club soda on it  and itshould umm, be..... 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 What?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Umm, youve got some on your pants.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Ill just throw them out.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 These little women. Wow!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Your liking it, huh?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Oh yeah! Amy just burned Jos manuscript. I dont see how hecould ever forgive her.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Umm, Jos a girl, its short for Josephine.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 But Jos got a crush on Laurie.  Oh. You meanits like a girl-girl thing? Cause that is the one thing missing from TheShining.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 No, actually Lauries a boy.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 No wonder Rachel had to read this so many times.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Hey!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Hey! Howd the ah, basketball go?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, I learned how to shoot a lay-up, a foul shot, and atwenty-three pointer.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 You mean a three pointer?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Oh, I get more because Im dainty.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 So um, is there a phone here, I can check my messages?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Yeah, in the back. You want a quarter?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Oh, no thanks. I always carry one in my sock. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	  What are you doing?  Get back over on your side of the... Hello!!  Hi, Im Joey, we havent met.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Ah, good to meet you. Robert.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 What?  What? You guys, what is going on? Younot like Robert?  Why are you laughing?!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Calm down. Theres no reason to get testy.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 You guys!! Come on!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Im sorry, Im sorry, it just seems that Robert isntas concealed in the shorts area, as ah, one may have hoped.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 What do you mean?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Hey. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Hey Robert, could you ah, ha, pass me those cookies?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Sure.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 So, howd the lasagne go over?  Really?! Good. So you oweme three pretty things.  Yeah, Ive been thinking a lot about you too. I know. Its hard this whole platonic thing.  Its a word!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Yeah, I do think its better this way.  Yeah, werebeing smart.   Yes, Im sure.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 You really sure?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Ill call you back. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 So we can be friends who sleep together.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Absolutely, this will just be something we do, like racquetball.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Sounds smart and healthy to me. So um, just out of curiosity, um, do youcurrently have any other racquetball buddies?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Just your dad.  Although thats actually racquetball. Youknow I-I do have a blind date with my sisters neighbour next Tuesday.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 You want me to cancel it?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 No!  No! 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Cause if you do that means youd be cancelling it for me, andwere just friends.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Exactly. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Hey. Ooh! Dont sit down! 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 You ready to go to the batting cage?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Yeah. And, first heres a gift.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Oh! Wow! Hey!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Stretchy pants! Why, those are the greatest things in the world! If Iwere you I would wear them every day, every day!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Jeez, thank you really that is so nice. But um, to be honest, Idont think I can wear these, theyre so tight, I feel like Im on display.Im sorry.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Thats all right, thats well, I figured.... 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	  Hey!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Hey!  Hows it going?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Good.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Hey, Rach, how you doing with The Shining?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Oh, Danny just went into room 217.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Oooh, the next parts the best, when that dead lady in the bathtub...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Oh, no, meh-nah-nah-nah, come on youre gonna ruin it!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 All right Ill talk in code.  Remember when thekid sees those two blanks in the hallway?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Hmmm, thats very cool.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Oh, all blank, and no blank, makes blank a blank blank. Oh no-no-no,no, the end when Jack almost kills them all with that blank, but then at last second theyget away. Aww!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Joey! I cant believe you just did that!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 I cant believe she cracked your code!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 All right, okay, Laurie proposes to Jo, and she says no, even thoughshes still in love with him, and then he ends up marring Amy.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Hey! Mine was by accident! All right, the boiler explodes and destroys thehotel, and kills the dad.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Eh. Beth dies.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Beth, Beth dies?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Um-hmm.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Is that true? If I keep reading is Beth gonna die?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 No, Beth doesnt die, she doesnt die. Does she Rachel?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 What?!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Joeys asking if youve just ruined the first book hesever loved that didnt star Jack Nicholson?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 No. She doesnt die.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Then why would you say that?!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Because, I wanted to hurt you.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	  Oh, there they are! I-I dropped my keys.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	  Oh my....
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Got em.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Hi.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	  Sorry. Imsorry.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 You would not believe my day! I had to work two shifts, and then to topit off, I lost one of my fake boobs,  in a grill fire.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 What are you smiling at?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Im sorry, I was just thinking youre day could still pick up.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Yeah, right.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Hello.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 I love this friend thing!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Listen, Roberts gonna be here any second so, will one of you justtell him?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Oh.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Please, right now, no, every time I see him its like Is iton the lose? Is it watching me?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 We cant tell him, you cant go up to a guy you barely knowand talk about his.... stuff.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	 Hes right, even if its to say something complementary. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	  Hey! 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Hey.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	  So are ready for the gym? Theyve got this new rockclimbing wall, we can spot each other.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 No, I can spot you from here.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 What?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Okay, listen Robert...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Ross	  Hey, dont we have to...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Chandler	 Yeah, we got, um-hmm.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 Umm, I think youre really, really great...
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Robert	 Oh God! Here we go again. Why does this keep happening to me?  Is it something Im putting out there? Is this my fault? Or am I just nuts?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Phoebe	 I-I-I-I-I dont know, I dont know what to say.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Gunther	   Hey buddy, this is a family place,put the mouse back in the house.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Ow!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	  Really?! Well, its just like everyoneelses apartment. Its got rooms, walls, and ceilings.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	RichardS Date	 Well, I just wanted to see where you lived. Now, give methe tour.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Oh my God! Oh my God! 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Ah well, this is the living room.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	RichardS Date	 Impressive.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 All right. This is the kitchen.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	RichardS Date	 Oh, thats real pretty. Wait a minute, dont Iget to see the bedroom?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 The bedroom. Well its pretty much your typical...  bedroom.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	RichardS Date	 Were still on this side of the door.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Um-hmm.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	RichardS Date	 Yeah, but I didnt get to see it.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Oh shoot! Maybe next time.  Thanks for a lovely evening. 
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  So um, who was she?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Oh,  that was the blind date that I told you about, she calledand switched it to today.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  Did you like her? And Im justasking as a friend, because I am totally fine with this.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Well, you seem fine.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	  Okay, y'know what, Im not fine, Im not. I mean howcan I be fine, hearing you come in with her, she wants to see your bedroom.... Y'know what, what if were friends who dont see other people?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 You mean like exclusive friends?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Why not?! I mean this has been the most amazing week. Would it be soterrible? Even if we were friends who lived together. Or, maybe someday friends who stoodup in front of their other friends, and vowed to be friends forever.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Wow. Y'know were back where we were. Honey, I would love to doall that, but nothings changed.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Thats not true, you dont have a moustache.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 Okay, okay, one things changed. But we still want differentthings and we know how this is gonna end.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Y'know what, Ive got to walk out of here right now, causegetting over you is the hardest thing that I have ever had to do. I dont think Icould do it again.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	 I know I couldnt. So....
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 How bout one last game of racquetball?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Monica	 Watch the thorns!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Richard	  Ow!!
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 What?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Beth is really, really sick.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Awwww.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Jos there, but I dont think theres anything she coulddo.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Joey?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	 Yeah.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Do you want to put the book in the freezer?
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Joey	  Okay.
03	13	0313	The One Where Monica And Richard Are Just Friends	Rachel	 Okay.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Singer	  Cause every time I see your face, I cant help butfall from grace. I know.....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Wow! This girl is good.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Oh-ho yeah! A song with rhyming words. Oo, I never thought of thatbefore.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 I like her.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	  Why? Because she can sing and play guitar and do both atthe same time?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Well, thats pretty much all Im looking for from thesepeople.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	  Look at you. All jealous.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Yeah Pheebs, come on, you two have completely different styles. Y'know,shes more.. y'know, and youremore 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Singer	  beside meeeee-eeee-ee. .
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay, see, see, everyone else is happy shes done.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Singer	 Okay, my next songs called: Phoebe Buffay, What Can I Say. IReally Loved When We Were Singing Partners, And I Shouldnt Have Left You That Way.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Oh no, one of those look for the hidden meaning songs.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Singer	 Hey Phoebe.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Hey Leslie, howd you know Id be here?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 I ran into Vlad at the place where they sell the big fish, and he saidyou played here a lot, so umm....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	  All right listen, I have to go to the bathroom, but if theplace with the big fish comes up again. Id like know whether thats several bigfish or just one big fish.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  So ah, Phoebe tells us you write jingles.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Actually I said she abandoned me to write jingles.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  Ah, anything we might of heard of?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Ah, yeah, umm.  Home is never far away..
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica, Ross, Joey	  Home is Home Star stew.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Yeah, but, I dont do that anymore. I got kinda sick of it, andthen I couldnt come up with anything good, so they fired me.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Hmm, bummer.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Well, I y'know, I was just, umm, I was just thinking and hoping, thatumm, maybe youd want to get back together?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 No. But thanks.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Aw come on Phoebe would you just think about it?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay. No. But thanks.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Okay, ah, see ya Pheebs. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  Wow, that was kinda brutal.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Well okay, let this be a lesson to all of you, all right. Once you, onceyou betray me, I become like the ice woman, yknow. Very cold, hard, unyielding,y'know nothing, nothing can penetrate this icy exterior.  Can I have atissue, please?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Yeah, sure.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Gunther	  Someone in there?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 No. This is just part of a dare devil game that I play calledwait until the last moment before I burst and die.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Jeez, man did you fall.. Hi! So ah, did ya, did-did-did ya fall high?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Woman	 Someone was in the lady's room, I couldnt wait. I left the lid upfor ya though.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	  Y'know what Gunther, go ah, go ahead, Im-Imtalking to ah, .  This is the part where you sayyour name.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Woman	 Ginger.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Ginger. Im talking to Ginger, so.... 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Dont you have to use the bathroom?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Nope, nope, Id just ah, Id rather talk to you. Yes, I do. Yes, I do have to go to the bathroom. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Gunther	 Someone in here.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Wheres Chandler?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Ah, he cant make it, he said he had to his...  Whoa-oh!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Joey? Joey Tribbiani? 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Joey I can see you okay? Youre hiding behind the coats.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Phew, close one.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Hi.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Hi, sweetie!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Hello. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Mark	 Hi, Ross.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Yeah, huh. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Ive got some bad news.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 What?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 I can get a quick bite to eat, but then I have to come back up here.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Come on sweetie! Youve had to work late every night for the past twoweeks, what is it this time?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Mark	 Actually, its kinda my fault. I-I quit today.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	  But work comes first!  Oh hey, but thats sadabout you though, what happened? Burn out? Burn all out, did ya?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Nooo, hes leaving for a better job.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Oh well thats great, so I guess this is ah, this is good bye then.Huh?  Good bye.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Mark	 Okay, then.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Okay.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Well were gonna miss you around here.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Mark	 Yeah, me too.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Mark	 So, see ya on Saturday.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Yeah, you bet.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Oh. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Y'know those are a delicacy in India.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Yeah, that was Leslie calling again to see if we can get back together.Thats the twentieth time today! And good luck Leslie!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Wow, she must have hurt you pretty bad, huh?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Well, yeah. Y'know, we were best friends, ever since we were little, ourMoms worked on the barge together.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Oh, you two must have been so cute running around on a barge.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 You never run on a barge!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  Hey.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe, Monica	 Hey.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Is ah, is Chandler around?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 No, umm, he met some girl at the coffee house.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Oooh.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Yeah, Ginger something.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Nooo. No, no, ah, are you sure it wasnt something that sounded likeGinger, like ah, Gingeer?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 No, it was Ginger. I remember, because when he told me, I said, the movie star.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Aww, man. Thats the girl I was hiding from. When she finds outhes my roommate, shes gonna tell him what I did.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Well, what did you do?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 What, oh, oh, oh, no, no, I cant, I cant tell you that,its like the most awful, horrible thing Ive ever done my whole life.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Y'know what, dont tell us. Well just wait until Chandlergets home,  because itll be more fun that way.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 All right!! Okay, it was like four years ago. Okay, Ginger and I had goneout a few times, and then this one weekend, we went up to her Dads cabin. Just me,her, and her annoying little dog Pepper. Well that night, I cooked this really romanticdinner....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 You gave her food poisoning!?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 I wish. No. After dinner, me, her, and Pepper all fell asleep in front ofthe fire. Well I woke up in the middle of the night and I saw that the fire was dying out.So, I picked up a log and threw it on. Or, at least what I thought was a log.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Oh my God!! You threw Pepper on the fire!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 I wish. See, I guess another thing I probably shouldve told youabout Ginger is that she kinda has a ah, artificial leg.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Oh my God! Joey, what did you do after you threw her leg on the fire?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 I ran!!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Well, thats the best kiss Ive had with anyone Iveever met in a mens room.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Actually, me too.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	  Op, foot in a puddle, foot all ina puddle.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Oh damn, I hate that.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Yeah, were gonna have to get you out of those shoes.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Oh, dont worry about it.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 No, really youre gonna freeze.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 No, Im not.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Youre not, what do you, what do you got a bionic foot?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Some day, maybe.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Funny book?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Hmmm. Oh, no, no, I just thinking about something funny I heard today.Umm, Mark, Mark saying Ill see you Saturday.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Yeah, at the lecture, I told you that last week, you said youdidnt mind.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Oh, no, no, no, its-its not the lecture ah, I mind, umm....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Oh, please tell me its not because Im going with Mark.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Oh, well...
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Oh my God!!! Ross!!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Well, Im sorry, but ah, look if youre not working with himanymore, why do you have to still do stuff with him?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Because, hes my friend.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Okay, but do you really need another friend? I mean...
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Okay, well if I stop playing with Joey and Chandler, can I play withMark?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Is that funny? Am I supposed to be laughing?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 I dont know, you thought See you Saturday was funny.Look honey, Mark is in fashion okay, I like having a friend that I can share this stuffwith. You guys would never want to go to a lecture with me.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Pa-haa!! I would love to go with you.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Really!?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Yeah, hey I-I have clothes, I even pick them out. I mean for, for all youknow I could be a fashion..... monger.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Okay. Honey, I would love for you to go with me.  What?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 What should I wear, now Im all nervous.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Y'know they say a watched pot never beeps.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Its just y'know, been a couple of hours, and she hasntcalled. Not that I even care, y'know.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Phoebe why dont you just call her? You obviously want to.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 You think you know me so well.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Well, dont cha wanna?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Yeah.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Okay, well I do know you.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Thats what I said.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Well so?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 I cant. I cant. She dumped me, I mean I totally trusted herand then one day it was Okay, bye Pheebs gone. Y'know what the saddest partis, when we were playing together, that was like the most fun Ive ever had in likeall my lives.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	  My best shoes, so good to me. I wear them everyday. Down atthe heel, holes in the toes. Dont care what people say. My feets best friends,pals to the end. With them Im one hot chicky. Though late one night, not much light,I....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	  I stepped in something icky.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe, Leslie	  Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, always make me smile.Sticky shoes, sticky shoes, next time Ill.... avoid the..... pillleeeee.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Lecturer	 Were beginning to see a lot of layering of sheer fabrics andcolours. For instance a sheer navy blouse over a pink....
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	  Im really glad we came. Youre so pretty. I love you.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Oh. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	  Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Smelly cat,smelly cat, its not your fault.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Wow, thats great.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Y'know you could totally sell this. Itd be perfect for like umm, akitty litter campaign.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 I..., a jingle? No, no-no-no, no.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 What? Why not? You could make a ton of money.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay, well if I was in this for the money, Id be a millionaire bynow, y'know. You just got to get out of that jingle head sweetie.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Aw, youre right, youre right. Im sorry.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Thats okay. All right, Im gonna play song thatsreally, really sad. Its called Magician Box Mix Up. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Lecturer	 ....oversized bracelets, oversized earrings, oversizing of accessoriesin general are very popular now.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	  Hi!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Hey.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Oh, can I borrow this?  My milks gone bad.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Oh, I hate that. I once had a thing of half and half, stole my car.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 So umm, how was your date with Ginger?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Great. It was great. Shes ah, shes great, great looking,great personality, shes greatness.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Sounds like shes got the ah, whole package.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Joey told you about the leg, huh?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Uh-huh.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Oh God, it freaked me out. Okay, I know it shouldnt have, but itdid. I mean I like her, I dont want to stop seeing her, but every so often itslike Hey, y'know what, wheres your leg? I mean Im the smallestperson in the world arent I? Im the smallest person in the world.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  Morning.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	  Actually hes the smallest person in the world.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	  Heard about the leg burnin huh?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 It came up.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Listen, I ah, I know its a longshot. But, by any chance did she findthat funny?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	  So I nodded off a little.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Nodded off!! Ross you were snoring. My fathers boat didntmake that much noise when it hit rocks!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Come on! Forty-five minutes! Forty-five minutes the man talked aboutstrappy backed dresses.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Well okay, how about four hours in a freezing museum auditoriumlistening to Professor Pitstains and hes Hey everybody! Remember that thingthats been dead for a gazillion years. Well theres this little bone wedidnt know it had!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 First of all its Professor Pittain! And second of all, that littlebone, proved that, that particular dinosaur had wings, but didnt fly.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Okay, see now, what I just heard: blah-blah-blah,blah-blah-blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah, blah.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Y'know what, 100 million people went to see a movie about what I do, Iwonder how many people would go see a movie called, Jurassic Parka.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Oh, that is so...
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 No-no-no, a bunch of out of control jackets take over an island. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Y'know if what I do is so lame, then why did you insist on coming withme this morning? Huh? Was it so I just wouldnt go with Mark?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 No. I... I wanted to be with you. I dont know, I feel like lately, Ifeel like youre slipping away from me, y'know. With this new job, and all these newpeople, and youve got this whole other life going on. I-I-I know its dumb, butI hate that Im not a part of it.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Its not dumb. But, maybe its okay that youre not apart of it. Y'know what I mean?  I mean its like, I-I-I likethat youre not involved in that part of my life.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Thats a little clearer.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 Honey see, it doesnt mean that I dont love you. Because Ido. I love you, I love you so much. But my work its-its for me y'know,Im out there, on my own, and Im doing it and its scary but I love it,because its mine. I, but, I mean is that okay?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Sure, I-I-I... 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Your thinking about my leg arent you?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 No. No. Actually I forgot, what is the deal with that again?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Its okay if it bothers you. Really. I mean the only thing I needto know is: How much it bothers you? because I dont like wasting mytime. Am I wasting my time?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 No. No. I dont think so.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Okay. Its just like anything else, you just have to get used toit.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Whats that?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Thats-thats my nubbin.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Whats a nubbin?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Its kinda a ah, a third nipple kinda thing.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 You have three nipples?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Well, y'know two regulars. And ah one that barely qualifies as... Ahh, what?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Nothing. I, I just remembered I have to leave.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 You ah, you have, you have to leave, now? How come?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ginger	 Ah well, its nubbin. Nothing! Umm. Y'know what, Ill see youlater. Okay. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	  Oh, I thought you werent coming. What? Where were you?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 Come here, come here.  Okay,dont get mad, okay.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay, dont give me a reason to get mad, okay
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 I played Smelly Cat for the people at my old ad agency, they went nuts.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 No, look, I told you that I didnt want you to try and sell it, andyou just, you big fat did it anyway. God, y'know what, I think five years ago I probablywouldve done anything to play with you but, I can do it by myself. And if Icant trust you then just forget it. 
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Leslie	 No, no, I dont want to forget it.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay y'know what you have to choose. All right, if-if the most importantthing on the planet to you is this cat poopy thing then, okay you can have Smelly Cat, butwe wont be partners. So whats it gonna be?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Commercial	  Problem odour in thelitter box? Dont change your kitty, change your kitty litter.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Sorry, Pheebs.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Yeah. You okay?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Yeah. I actually am, yeah. Y'know life-lifes gonna had you allkinds of stuff, y'know you learn your little lessons and hopefully you grow. Wanna hear anew song?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Yeah.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Wed love too.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Phoebe	 Okay.  Jingle bitch screwed me over! Go to hell jinglewhore! Go to hell Go to hell. Go to hell-hell-hell. Thats all I have so far.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	  Well hello!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Joey	 Where have you been?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 The doctor.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Ross	 Is everything okay?
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 Oh yes! Just had me a little nubbin-ectomy. Yep! Two nipples, nowaiting.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Wow! Its like Rachel in High School.
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Rachel	 What?!!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Monica	 Come on! Come on, I was kidding! It was such an obvious joke!
03	14	0314	The One With Phoebe's Ex-Partner	Chandler	 That was an obvious joke, and I didnt think of it.Why didnt I think of it? The source of all my powers. Oh dear God, what have I done!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	  Hey, how much will you give me to eat this whole jar ofolives?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 I wont give you anything, but youll owe me 2.95.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Done.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  Hey. I need an atlas! I need an atlas!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Why?  Do you have a report due?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 I have a date with this diplomat I met while I was giving free massagesoutside the UN and, I dont know where his country is.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Okay, lets start with the free messages outside the UN.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Oh!! Thats my new thing. I figure bodies at peace, make peace.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Wow! You might just get the first Nobel prize in rubbing. So whatcountry is this guy from?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Ick-neck-tree-anis..... Theres a g in there.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Wheres that?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 In your atlas!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 I dont have an atlas.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh, but wait I do have a globe.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Hold on.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 So Pheebs whats this guy like?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Umm, well hes very dashing, y'know, and umm, very, verysophisticated, and he doesnt speak any English, but according to his translator, hetotally gets me.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Kay, here you go. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 What is this?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Its a globe and, a pencil sharpener.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	  Hey, does anybody need anything copied? Im going downto the Xerox place.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh, no thanks.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Okay listen, just give me anything I can make two of.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Well, if you dont have anything to copy, why are you going downthere?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah, are you just going down there to gawk at that hot girl with thebelly button ring again?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yeah! You wanna come?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Come on Chloe! Finish up with your customer first. Come on Chloe! Comeon Chloe!!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Issac	  Can I help you?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Uh-oh.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Uh, y'know what, were having second thoughts about our copyingneeds. And well need a little more time to think about it.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Issac	 Chloe, switch with me, theres some guys here that got a crush onyou.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	  Okay, that hurt us.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Hi guys. I havent seen you since this morning.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Well ah, ........y'know.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Hey, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Both of us? 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Maybe. Does that scare ya?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Relax. Its just Issacs D.J.-ing at the Philly. You shouldcome.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Well be there.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Great. Ill ah, see ya then.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 All right, rock on. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	 Hes says, Walking with you makes this strange city, feellike home.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Me too. Although this city is my home, so. So thats dumb what Isaid, dont tell him I said that. Umm, you make something up.  Nice,  thank you. This is me. Here.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  Your eyes are very pretty.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  Thank you, very much! Oh!  Thank you!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  He would like to kiss you.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  Okay, y'know what, you dont have to do that now. No-no-no-no!! Not him, you dont!  Well the moments over.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	 Oy!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  See there it is right there.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Wow! Its small.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Yeah. But Sergei said it took the Germans six weeks to get all the wayacross it.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 So you had fun, huh?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Yeah. Except for, y'know when youre on a date and youregetting along really great but the guys translator keeps getting in the way.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 No.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	  Hey.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe, Monica	 Hey.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 What is ah, Rach in her room?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh no, shes still at work, but she told me to tell you to callher.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Oh what?! Is she gonna cancel on me again?! How can she do this?Doesnt she know its our anniversary?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 All right ah, Ross, this is the extent of my knowledge on the subject. Call Rachel.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Whats that on the bottom?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh thats my doodle of a ladybug, with a top hat. Shes fancy.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Hello.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Hey, honey.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh, hi.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Hey, whats going on?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Well, there was a disaster in shipping and Ive got to get thisorder in. Honey, Im so sorry, but it looks like Im gonna be here all night.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 What, do you, well umm, oh how about I come up there?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 No-no-no, no, honey please, Ive got, Ive just have so muchto deal with.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  Anyway, Im going out with Sergei again tonight, andum, could you come and be the translators date? So that when we, its time forour alone time, you two could split off. Y'know, hes really, hes kinda cute.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Yeah, well kinda cute, like really kinda cute, or kinda cute like yourfriend Spackel Back Larry?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Hey, dont call him that! His name is Spackel Back Harry!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Hey, y'know what, maybe we should get going. I mean what time didChloe say we should be there?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Uh, 10:30.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 What time is it now?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 4:30.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yeah all right, so well hang out.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah. Hey, remember when she brought up that thing about the three of us?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yes. Vividly.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 She was kidding about that right?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yeah, I-I-I think so.  Yeah,I-I think so...
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 God, that would be weird it that situation presented itself tonight, huh?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yeah. Yeah, I mean what, what would we do?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Dude, I dont know.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 She was kidding.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 She was.... But y'know what, just in case, maybe we should come upwith a set of ground rules.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah, for sure. Okay. Probably want the first thing to be, never open youreyes. Y'know, because you dont want to be doing something and then look up and seesomething you dont want to be seeing.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Yeah. Good call, nice one. Hold it!! Hold it! What if me eyes areclosed, and, and my hand is out there.... 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Ah!! Okay! Eyes open at all times! Oh, hey, how do we decide where we... y'know each would,  y'know  be?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Right. Right. Well ah, y'know we could flip for it.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah, I guess, but whats like heads and whats tails?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Well it you dont know that, then I dont want to do thiswith you.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  No, no, no, Im looking at a purchase order righthere and it clearly states that we ordered the Rivera bikini in a variety of sizes andcolours. And....  What does it matter, what Im wearing?! Can I please speakto your supervisor?  Thank you.  Were holding.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	  Hi!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Oh!! My God, what are you doing here?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Well you said you couldnt go out so.... 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sophie	 You brought a picnic, oh, what a boyfriend. Thats it, on Monday Istart wearing make-up.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Ross honey, this is very nice, but, but I-I got a crisis.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah, but I got cous-cous!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Honey, honey, Im sorry, I know its our anniversary but Itold you on the phone I dont have time to stop.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Okay, you dont have to stop, Im invisible, Im not here.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 But I dont, hmm...  Oh, who approved that order?! Well there is no Mark Robbinson in this office.  Get me Mark on thephone!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sophie	 I love Mark.  Do you know Mark?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah!!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Well, let me just check that with what I got here, all right see 038 isnot the number for  thisstore, 038 is Atlanta. And I...
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	  Pepper?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  None for me.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Okay sorry, whew.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Im sorry, as I was saying the store number is wrong, and Imsorry but thats...  Oh my God!! 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	  Okay, thats afire. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Excuse me, Im sorry, Im gonna have to call youback, Ive got a Schemp in my office.   What are you doing?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Im sorry. But ah, hey, oh, somebodys off the phone, howbout a glass of wine by the fire, I could get it going again.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Ross youre not listening to me, I dont have time to stop.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Come on Rach, you dont have what, ten minutes?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 I dont have ten minutes!!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 What?  Sophie, does she have ten minutes?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Hey, Ross!!! I told you I dont!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Dont yell at me okay, this is the most Ive seen you all week.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Look, I cannot do this right now, okay, Ive got a deadline, wouldyou just go home, Ill talk to you later.  
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah, but wait...
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Good bye!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sophie	 Actually, thats our three hole punch.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Hey.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Hi. Look um, about what happened earlier...
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 No, hey, well, I-I completely understand. You were, you were stressed.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  I was gonna give you a chance to apologise tome.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 For what? For letting you throw me out of your office?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 You had no right coming down to my office Ross. You do not bringa picnic basket to somebodys work! Unless maybe they were a park ranger!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah, well excuse me for wanting to be with my girlfriend on ouranniversary, boy what an ass am I. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 But I told you, I didnt have the time!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah, well you never have the time. I mean, I dont feel like I evenhave a girlfriend anymore, Rachel.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Wh, Ross what do you want from me? You want me, you want me to quit myjob so you can feel like you have a girlfriend?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 No, but itd be nice if you realised, its just a job!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Just a job!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yes.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life Im doingsomething I actually care about. This is the first time in my life Im doingsomething that Im actually good at. I mean. if you dont get that...
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And Im happy for ya,but Im tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, Idont know what to do anymore.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Well neither do I!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Is this about Mark?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Oh my God.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Okay, its not, its not.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again,Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Oh Im, Im making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me todo.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should takea break.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Okay, okay, fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take abreak,  lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yogart, orsomething.. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 No.  A break from us.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 And the advances in collating in the past five years, I mean we just gotin an X-5000, y'know. The X-5000 makes the X-50 look like a T-71. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	  Hey, its the dinosaur guy. Hi, Ross.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Oh, hi Chloe.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 I want you to met some friends of mine.  This guy is my hero, he comes in with some stuff he wants it blown up 400%, we saidwe dont do that, and he says you gotta. And y'know what, we did it. And now anytimeanybody wants 400, we just say lets Ross it!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 And thats the only colour that comes in.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Issac	 Yo, Chloe, do you have a quarter for the condom machine?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Oh! 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 So, what are you doing here? I thought tonight was your biganniversary dinner.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah, little change in plans. Ahh, were gonna break-up instead.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh, and I can also speak a little French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moice soir?  Why? What did I say?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	 Well, you just asked if I wanted to go to bed with you tonight.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh my God! No wonder I get such great service at Cafe Maurice.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	  Knock, knock, knock,knock, hi. Um, could you please tell Sergei that um, I was fascinated by what BoutrosBoutros Gali said in the New York Times.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 You didnt say Boutros Boutros Gali.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  Boutros Boutros Gali.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	 He says he was too.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Interesting.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  So I was wondering....
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Okay, ah, before you get all talky again, umm, could you also pleasetell Sergei that I really like his suit.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  Eh, he said, thank you very much, he thinksyou look very pretty tonight, your hair, golden like the sun.  So you're achef?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Im also thinking about opening up my own restaurant.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	 Oh, really.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Monica, can I talk to you behind my menu, please.  Whatare you doing?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Well, I was having a conversation.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Yeah but, Mischa is so interested in you, that Sergei and I haventbeen able to say two words to each other.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 What do you want me to do? Just sit here silently while you three have aconversation?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 That would be great. Thank you.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Hello!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Oh, hi. Its Mark.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Oh.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 What? Is it my breath?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 No! Sorry, I just thought you were somebody else. Hi!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Hi. Well, look, I was just gonna leave a message, isnt tonight your,your big anniversary dinner?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Yeah. Well, umm.....
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Rach, are you okay?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Yeah, Im fine.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 You wanna talk, I mean I can come over?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 No! Really, no, please, please, thats, thats okay.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 All right, all right, Im coming over, and Im bringing Chinesefood.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, Im not, Im not hungry.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Its for me.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh. Okay, bye.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 So what are you gonna do?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 What can I do? One person wants to break-up, you break-up.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Hey, no way! Come on, this is you guys, call her and work it out.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Oh come on, we just had this huge fight, all right, dont I have towait a while?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Hey, this isnt like swimming after you eat, pick up the phone!!
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Y'know that whole swimming thing is a myth.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Yeah, tell that to my Uncle Lenny.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chandler	 Why? What happened to him?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Joey	 Nothing, hes just really believes in that.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. I just, it was awful.I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wantedto take a break, I dont want to take a break.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Wow. Im sorry. Eggroll?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 No.  And then I called him, and he wasnt there.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Well, then hes, hes probably just, out.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Oh, thank you thats very helpful, Im glad you came over.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Hello.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Hi! Its me.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Hi! Oh, Im so glad you called.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Really? Ive been thinking, this is crazy, I mean dont,dont you think we can work on this? 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Hey, what do you want to drink?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Whos that?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Nobody.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mark	 Is it okay if I finish the apple juice?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Is that Mark?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	 Umm, honey, look he just came over to....
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Yeah! Got it! 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Hey, dinosaur guy, look at you, so sad. Come dance.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Ah, thats okay, thanks.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Hey, you dont have to smile. You just have to dance.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Look, I dont feel like dancing, I feel like having a drink. Okay?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Oh, okay.  Hey, two beers.  
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  And the vet said it was time. And so from half a world away,while my Mother held the phone to his ear, I said good bye to my dog,. In seven languages.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Oh.  Can I have a tissue?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, sure. I just hope you, hope you dont accidentally suckit up through your nose and choke on it.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  Sergei, would like to apologise for my behaviour tonight.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Well, tell him, apology accepted.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  Oh, hes unbelievable. I mean for the first time inthree years somebody wants to actually want to talk to me, but do you think he would letme enjoy that, no!!  You silly diplomat, why dont you learn some English,Sergei?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Excuse me, but umm, isnt he paying for your dinner?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 Hey, the mans dog just died.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Mischa	  I have just resigned my post. Would you care to accompany meto the Rainbow Room? I have diplomatic coupons.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Monica	 It will be my pleasure.  My guy has diplomatic coupons. Yourguy cant even say coupons. 
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	 Uh,  plate?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Plate! Yes, plate.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	 Plate. Plate. Plate.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 See, we dont need them.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	  Plate?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Yeah.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	  I like this song.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Well, youre practically dancing already. Why dont you just doit over here?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Ross	 Oh, no, no.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 What? Are you married? Cause thats okay.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Rachel	  Oh, be home, be home, be home, behome, be home, be home. Be home. Be home, be home, be home. Oh, youre not home.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Chloe	 Still no smile?
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	  Touchet, touchet, Miss Americccan pie.  Ameri-ccan.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Ameri-can.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	 Ameri-ccan.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Phoebe	 Ameri-can. Y'know its a very hard language. Lets doit again.
03	15	0315	The One Where Ross And Rachel Take A Break	Sergei	  Everybody!! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	  Previously on Friends.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 I mean, I dont feel like I even have a girlfriend anymore.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 You want me to just quit my job so that you can feel like youvegot a girlfriend?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Is this about Mark?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  Oh my God.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Okay, its not, its not.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight with you Ross! Look,urrgh, maybe we should take a break.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take a break,  lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yoghurt, or something..
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 No. A break from us.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Then, we had this big, stupid fight, and I said I wanted to take abreak, I dont want to take a break.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Ive been thinking, this is crazy, I mean dont,dont you think we can work on this? 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Mark	 Hey, what do you want to drink?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Whos that?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Nobody.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Is that Mark?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Umm, honey, look he just came over to....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah! Got it! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Hey, come dance. What? Are you married? Cause thats okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Hey.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Hey.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Hows the big anniversary dinner?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Well, we never actually got to dinner.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Ohhh, nice.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 No, we kinda broke up instead.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 What?! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  God, Monica its on the ceiling.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Thats okay, this is more important than fruit   onmy ceiling! You broke up?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Yeah, but its okay, because when Ross left Mark came over.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Oh no!! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 No.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Rachel, you and Mark?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 No, no-no, its okay, calm down. Mark and I talked, and I realisedhow much I love your stupid brother, and, yeah, we got our problems, but I really want tomake it work.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	  Morning!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  Hi, its me. Ive been trying to reachyou all night. I feel awful. Please, Ross, you gotta know there is nothing between me andMark. This whole break-up thing is just stupid. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Eh, Im just so sorry I put you through it. And, I y'know, Idont want to get back together over a machine.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Na-huh.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 So, I love you.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 I love you.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 And y'know what, Im gonna, Im gonna go to bed now, but ah,on my way to work tomorrow morning, Im gonna stop by around 8:30.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Okay. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Bye.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Chloe, Chloe hows it coming?!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	  Hey, what kind of puppy do you think I shouldget?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Umm, oh, hey, I dont know. How about a big one?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 But my apartment is so...
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Well then a small one!! Listen, lets, we kinda have to get going!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Wait! Wheres my shoes?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 You, you sure you need shoes?  Okay. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Do I know why were rushing?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah, y'know the ah, the girlfriend I told you about last night?Well it turns out she ah, she wants to get back together with me. Oh, I found it!! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Thats so great for you guys!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 You must be so happy!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yes, yes I am, one of the many things Im feeling. Well.... 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Good luck, with your girlfriend. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Oh, thank you.  Hey, hey.  Rachel!!!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Hi. Ohhh, you got my message.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah, oh hey, you are right on time.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yes, you can, very much.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Ahhhh!! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Hey!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Hey.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Hey, why are you mopping your ceiling?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Oh, theres banana on it.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Wow, I have the spirit of an old Indian women living in mine.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 So then you know? 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 The mailman was downstairs, so I brought up your mail.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Oh, good. Thanks.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Now what is Fabutec?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Okay, all right dont judge me to much. Okay? Um, but I saw thisinfo-mercial, and um, I swear to you I have never-ever bought anything on TV before,except for this mop. But there was this stuff on leg waxing, it just, it looked soamazing....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Waxine!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Yes! Have you seen it?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Oh, its incredible! I so want to be a Waxine girl.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 I know!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 God. Do think it really doesnt hurt? Cause how can they dothat?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Hello! Organic substances recently discovered in the depths of the rainforest!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 They have the best stuff in there.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Oh my God! Oh my God!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Yeah. We figured when we couldnt find you, youd gone home tomake up with Rachel. Which is probably what you shoulda done. Huh?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 You think?! God, I, ah, Im in hell. I mean what, what am I gonna do?Rachels all like, I love you and, and lets work on this. And all Ican think about is, What is she gonna do? What is she gonna say? when I tellher what I did.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Well, before we answer that, I think we should address the moreimportant question. How dumb are you?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What?! Look, were trying to rebuild a relationship here, right. Howam I supposed to do that here, without being totally honest with each other?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Look, Ross look, Im on board about this totally honesty thing, I am,just not about stuff thats gonna get you in trouble.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Hes right. Nobodys gonna benefit, and youre justgonna hurt her.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Yeah, and there wont be a relationship left to rebuild.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah, but dont you think....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 All right look, if you absolutely have to tell her, at least waituntil the timings right. And thats what deathbeds are for.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah, okay. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 All right, okay, now, we just have to make sure she doesnt find outsome other way.  Did you think aboutthe trail?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What trail?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	  Thetrail from the woman you did it with to the woman you hope never finds out who did it! You always have to think about the trail!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Oh, I-I dont think theres any trail.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Okay, okay-okay, ah, Chloe works with that guy Issac. Issacssister is Jasmine. And Jasmine works at that message place with Phoebe. And Phoebesfriends with Rachel. And thats the trail, I did it!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	  After applying the Waxine and linenstrips to leg number one, 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Did that!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Grasp one of the linen strips by its easy grab tab and pullit off in one quick pain free motion.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Okay.  Ow!!!!! Ow-oh-oh!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Was it not pain-free?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 No. It was painful. Oh my God , they should call it Pain-zine, now witha little wax.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Huh, well, the girls in the satin nighties on the commercial dontseem to think its that bad.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Thats because their nerves are probably deadened from being sostupid. But hey, y'know if you dont believe me, please, by my guest.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	  Ow-ow-ow-ow! Oh my God!!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Now, are you glad we didnt start with the bikini strips?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Chloe? Hi.. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Is this about me taking your watch?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 You took my watch?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Im sorry, I do that.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Just you keep it, listen did you, did you tell anyone about us?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Oh no. I feel it isnt really anybodys business, y'know.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Exactly. So you didnt, didnt mention anything to Issac right?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chloe	 Oh, well I tell Issac everything.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 You tell, of course you do. Issac. Issac. Hey, Issac. Issac, hi! Y'know wehavent actually met...
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 You dog!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yes, I suppose I am a dog. But Issac, see I-I happen to have a girlfriend.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Oh right, that Rachel chick from the coffee place.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah, thats the one. Listen, I dont want to hurt her.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Oh, hey, man I know, doesnt matter how much we love em,monogamy is too cruel a rule.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yeah. Listen, can you keep this information to yourself?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Aw, no problem dude. Y'know we got to look out for each other. Werethe same, you and me.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Actually, no, were not.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Yeah, we are.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No, were not.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Yeah, we are.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No, were not!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 Okay, were not.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Right.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 But, we are.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Fine. I just need to know that youre not gonna tell your sister.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Issac	 I can promise not to tell her again.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Jasmine? 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 Uh-huh.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 We met at Phoebes birthday party, Im, Im Ross Geller.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 You did a bad thing!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Yes, I did.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 Very bad!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Very bad.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 Very, very bad.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Im agreeing with you. Did you, listen, did you happen to tell Phoebeyet?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 No.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Okay, Jasmine, please, please dont. I love my girlfriend very much,and I want more than anything to just work it out with her. Okay?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 All right.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Thank you, thank you.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Jasmine	 But you should probably talk to my roommate, because I told him and heknows Phoebe too.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Whos your roommate?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything toRachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Gunther	 Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Ow!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Oh!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Ow!! Ow!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Ow!!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica, Phoebe	 Ow!!!!!!! Ow-ow-ow-ow!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Were all right.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Its okay, its okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Were all right.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 We were just waxing our legs.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Off?!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 For your information, this happens to be a pain like no man will everexperience.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Yeah, well I dont think you can make that statement, unlessyouve been kicked in an area that God only meant to be treated nicely.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Yeah, I-I think that women just have a lower threshold of pain than men,thats all. I mean, come on, its just a little wax.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, come here. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Oh, thats mature.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Okay, fine, so now what, I just pull it off?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Thats right.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Come on, Rachel, come on! Talk to me! Please!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 I cant talk to you. I cant even look at you right now!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 What?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Nothing, nothing.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	  Rachel said everything was okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	  What, what are they talking about?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Rachel?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Just get away from me!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No, it was a mistake! I made a mistake! Okay?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 A mistake?! What were you trying to put it in? Her purse?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Whe-where did he put it?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Ross, you had sex with another woman!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Oh my God.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Oh, I knew something had to be wrong, because my fingernails did notgrow at all yesterday.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I guess they had a fight, and he got drunk....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Oh!!  You guys knew about this andyou didnt tell us?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	  He has sex, and we get hit in our heads.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  Y'know what, I want you to leave! Get outta here! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Just get out! Now!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No!! No!! I wanna stay. I wanna talk about this.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Okay! All right! How was she?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Uh-oh.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Was she good?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Dont answer that.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talkabout it!! How was she?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 She was...
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Awful! Horrible!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 She was not good. Not good.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 She was nothing compared to you.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 She, she was different.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Ewwwww!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Uh-oh.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Good different?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Nobody likes change.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What? Okay, okay, okay, okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Should we do something?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Yeah, never cheat on Rachel.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Im sorry, okay, Im sorry. I wa-I was disgusted with myself,and this morning I was so, I was so upset and then I got your message and I was so happy,and all I wanted was to get her out of my apartment as fast as possible.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Whoa!! Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. What time did your little friendleave?  Oh my God. She was there? She was still there? Shewas in there, when I was in there?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Listen. Oh hey, hey, the important thing was that she meant, she meantnothing to me!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 And yet she was worth jeopardising our relationship!! 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Look, I didnt think there was a relationship to jeopardise. Ithought we were broken up. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 We were on a break!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 That, for all I knew would, could last forever. That to me is a break-up.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 You think youre gonna get out of this on a technicality?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Look, Im not trying to get out of anything, okay. I thought ourrelationship was dead!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Well, you sure had a hell of a time at the wake!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Y'know what, I dont think we should listen to this anymore. 
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	  What, what are you doing? You cant go out there.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Why not?!  Im hungry.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Because theyll know weve been listening.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 God! And to have to hear about it from Gunther!!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Come on! Like I wanted him to tell you, I ran all over the place trying tomake sure that didnt happen!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Oh, that is so sweet. I think Im falling in love with you all overagain.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Y'know what, I think we can go out there. I mean they have moreimportant things to worry about.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Yeah, well be fine.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Look Rachel, I wanted to tell you, I thought I should, I-I did, and thenChandler and Joey convinced me not to.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	  Wax the door shut, were never leaving,ever.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Hi, its Phoebe. Listen someones gonna have to take my 9:00with Mr. Rehack, cause its like 9:15 now, and Im not there.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Dont you realise none of this wouldve ever happened if Ididnt think at that same moment you werent having sex with Mark?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 All right. Lets say I had slept with Mark. Would you have beenable to forgive me?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Yes I would.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Youd be okay if you knew that Mark had kissed me, and been nakedwith me, and made love to me?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Yes.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 You knew that our hot, sweaty, writhing bodies were....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! Okay,okay, yeah, I would have been devastated but, I would still want to be with you. Becauseits, I mean its you.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	All	 Ohhhhh!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What? Come on Rach, tell me what youre thinking?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Im thinking, Im gonna order a pizza.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Order a pizza like, I forgive you?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Oh man, pizza? I like pizza.  Put olives on the pizza.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 We could eat the wax! Its organic.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Oh great, food with hair on it.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 No, not the used wax.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Because that would be crazy?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Hey, can I, can I get in on that? Because Im kinda hungry myself.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Fine.  Hi! Yes, Id like to order a large pizza.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 No anchovies.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 With ah, extra anchovies.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Thats okay, Ill just pick em off.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Yeah, and could you please chop some up and just put it right there inthe sauce?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 You can have the last piece, if you want.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Well, I should think so. You slept with someone.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Theyre gonna get through this, arent they?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Yeah, come on, its Ross and Rachel, theyve got too.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 What if they dont?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 You think I need a new walk?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 What?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Well y'know, Ive been walking the same way since high school.Y'know, y'know how some guys they walk into a room and everybody takes notice. I think Ineed a take notice walk.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Are you actually saying these words?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What, now youre not even taking to me?  Look Rachel, I-Im sorry, okay, Im sorry, I was out of my mind. Ithought Id lost you, I didnt know what to do. Come on! Come on, how insanemust I have been to do something like this? Huh? I-I dont cheat right, I,thats not me, Im not Joey!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Whoa-ho-ho!  Yeah, okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Monica	 Hey. Its three in the morning. They dont know that Ivecome home yet. You notice how neither one of them are wondering where I am.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Yeah, y'know, people can be so self-involved.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Y'know what, y'know what, Im-Im not the one that wanted that,that break, okay. Youre the one that bailed on us. Youre the one that, thatran when things got just a little rough!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Thats....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Thats what?!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 That is neither here nor there.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Okay, well here we are. Now were in a tough spot again, Rach. Whatdo you want to do? How do you want to handle it? Huh? Do you wanna fight for us? Or, doyou wanna bail?  Look, I,  I did a terrible,stupid, stupid thing. Okay? And Im sorry, I wish I could take it back, but Icant.  I just cant see usthrowing away something we know is so damn good. Rachel, I love you so much.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 No Ross!!  Dont! You cantjust kiss me and think youre gonna make it all go away, okay? It doesnt workthat way. It doesnt just make it better. Okay?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Okay, okay, okay.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  I think you should go.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 What?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  I really think you need to go now.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Okay, okay. This morning you saidthere was nothing so big that we couldnt work past it together...
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Yeah, what the hell did I know!
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	 Look, look, theres got to be a way we can work past this. Okay, I cant imagine, I cant imagine my lifewithout you.  Without, without these arms, and yourface, and this heart. Your good heart Rach,  and, and....
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	  No. I cant, youre a totally different person to menow. I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. God, and nowI just cant stop picturing with her, I cant, it doesnt matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. Its just changed,everything. Forever.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Ross	  Yeah, but this cant be it, I mean.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Rachel	 Then how come it is?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Phoebe	 Theyve been quiet for a long time.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	 Maybe she killed him?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	 Lets go.
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Chandler	  Is that your new walk?
03	16	0316	The One The Morning After	Joey	  No, I really have to pee.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Can I see the comics?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 This is the New York Times.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Okay, may I see the comics?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Guys. I thought you were taking Ross to the game?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 We are. Hes meeting us here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 No! Rachel is meeting us here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Oh come on, they can be in the same room.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Yeah, you shoulda been there last night.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Why? What happened now?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Well Ross was hangin out over at our place, Rachel comes over toborrow some moisturiser from Chandler....
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Yeah y-you, how hard is it to say something? Rachel came over toborrow something.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Anyway! Her and Ross just started yelling at each other.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Wait. Why was he yelling at her? Hes the one who slept withsomeone else. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Well, I guess he says that because they were on a break when it happened,that she should of forgiven him by now.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Whoa!! He is soo unreasonable! God, although I think I understand whathe means. Oh my God, this is like 60 Minutes, okay, when, when, at firstyoure really mad at that pharmaceutical company for making the drug and then y'knowyou just feel bad for the people because they needed to make their hair grow.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Y'know what this is like? This is like when my parents got divorced.Man, I hope Ross doesnt try to kidnap me after Cub Scouts.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Y'know I had a dream where Ross and Rachel were still together, theynever broke up. And we were all just like hanging out, and everyone was happy....
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 I had the same dream!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yeah, and nobody slept with that Xerox girl. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Oh, I had the opposite dream.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Y'know what maybe its gonna be okay, I mean its been aweek.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Yeah, I mean its never taken me a week to get over a relationship.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Its never taken you more than a shower to get over arelationship.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	  Okay, lets go!! Lets hit the road!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Hey!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Lets get the show on it! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Okay, let me just get a cup of coffee.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Oh Rachel, I know the best coffee house and its sooo close.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Closer than here?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  Oh, hey, look, I foundcoffee!  Okay, lets skedaddle.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Wait, Im not just gonna drink somebodys old coffee.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay, your highness.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  Um, Rachel Im really sorry. Thats okay, do you wanna get back together? Yeah, okay.  Did anyone else hear that?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	  Is he here?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 No.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Oh.  Heres your moisturiser. Hi! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica, Phoebe	 Hey!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 You guys are gonna love meee! Okay, check it out, Thursday night, fivetickets, Calvin Klein lingerie show, and you guys are coming with me.  Okay, I said that out loud right?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Yes, yes, its just that we ah, we kinda all ready, made planswith Ross.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Oh, well okay. Well, there you go.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 No, its just that he got this new like home theater dealie, and hewants y'know, us to check it out.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Hm-mm.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Yeah, hes really excited about it too, he even recorded showtimes on his answering machine.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Ohh!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Were sorry honey.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Oh, its okay. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Rach, its, its ah, its not that we dont want to,really.  Are we talking models in their underwear?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 And heels.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	   Ross, did ask us first, andwe set that night aside.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, thats only fair. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Ohhh boy, do I feel bad.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Oh yeah.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Very bad.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Chandler what are you doing?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Chandler!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	  Oh my God!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Youre smoking again?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Well, actually, yesterday I was smoking again. Today, Im,Im smoking still.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Why would you start again after chewing all that quitting gum?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Look, Im telling you this is just like my parents divorce, whichis when I started smoking in the first place.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Werent you nine?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Yeahhh. Im tellin ya something, that ah, first smoke afternap time....
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh thats great, with my luck, thats gonna be him.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Him? Him, Ross?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Nope, hymn 253, His Eyes Are On The Sparrow! When my parents gotdivorced is when I started using humour as a defence mechanism. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Hi! Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? Because I have mysister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing.Huh? Im asking you first, right?!. I mean Im playing by the rules.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	All	 Absolutely, yeah!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Chandler! Youre smoking? What are you doing?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Hey, shut up!! Youre not my real Mom!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	  Hey, can you close that window Chandler? My nipples cancut glass over here!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Wait. Really?! Cause mine get me out of tickets.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Look, you guys I just wanna say, I really, really appreciate you spendingthis time with me. Its been a pretty hard time right now, so I just wanna saythanks.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Can somebody else hug him? I have to stay by the window.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh hey, hey, huh, how about this weekend we have a laser disc marathonokay, and maybe a tournament on my new dart board? Huh, huh, what do you think?  Two days of darts, itll be great!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Itll be great for next weekend.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 No, no, no, this weekend guys!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Itll be great for next weekend. I mean, itll be grrreat.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Whats going on?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Well, we were um, sorta invited to go skiing, y'know Rachelssisters cabin. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 So, for the whole weekend?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Were really sorry, but um, she did ask us first.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Yeah, thats okay, I mean if you guys all have to go away forthe first weekend Im alone by myself, y'know then I totally, totally understand.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Y'know what, I can stay, Im gonna stay. Cause the last timeI went skiing I was to afraid to jump off the chair lift, I just went around and around.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Uh, Pheebs we kinda need you to drive us all up there in yourgrandmothers cab, but y'know what, Ill stay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Noo! Ill stay. Hes my brother.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 What a pity stay?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 No! Were gonna have fun. We can make fudge!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Pity food? Y'know what thats okay, all right, I dont need anyof you to stay, okay nobody stays.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Well, then, I might as well offer to stay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	  Hey, does anybody else feel bad about Ross?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Why? Do you think hes still mad at us?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	  Well hes probably mad after you called him thismorning to borrow his goggles.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 What? Mine arent tinted.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Chandler!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 What?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 What does the sign say?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Beam me up Jesus.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 No, the No Smoking sign. Theres no smoking in myGrandmothers cab.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Okay, well, then, I-I have to go to the bathroom.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	All	 Oh!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Please!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 No Chandler no! No unscheduled stops. You can go when we stop for gas.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh, come on, theres a rest stop right up there! Come on, Ireally have to goooooooooo.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Oh, now I have to go!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Here we go. Okay, brace yourselves.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 What?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Okay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Ow!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  Arent you gonna go?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No. Thank you.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	  No, Rachel never pees in public restrooms.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. So my rule is notissue, no tuschy.  Well, if everybodys going.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 No, y'know what dont close it  cause the... keys...are in there.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh, no-no-no-no-no-no!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Whats going on?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	  My lighters in there! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Damn!  The tailpipes not hot enough to light this!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Relax okay, I-I-I can get this open. Anybody have a coat hanger?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh I do! Op, no, wait a minute, I took it out of my shirt when I putit on this morning.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 So, if youre parents hadnt got divorced, youd be ableto answer a question like a normal person?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Look, I just need a wire something to jimmy it. Oh hey, one of you guysgive me the underwire from your bra!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 What?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 What?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Come on! Who has the biggest boobs?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Please!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Whoever has the biggest boobs, has the biggest bra, therefore has thebiggest wire.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	The Girls	 No, not getting my bra!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 If you wanna get back in the car, we need the wire, your call.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay, Monicas are the biggest.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 These tiny, little non-breasts?! Please, its gotta be Rachel.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 What, no, no, no, mine are deceptively small I mean, I-I-I actuallysometimes, st-stuff my bra.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 All right then, your bra would still be big.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No, I stuff outside the bra.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Ladies, ladies, lets just compromise okay? Phoebe, Rachel takeoff Monicas bra.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 All right, forget it, nevermind, you can have mine.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	  Chandler, what are you doing? There is a trash can rightthere.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Well, I thought if I littered, that crying Indian might come by andsave us.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  Okay, there.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Thank you Phoebe, that is very, very generous.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Okay, now lets decide who has the nicest ass.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	  And there you go!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	All	 Oh, yeahhhhh!!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Chandler!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 At least let me smoke it to the good part.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay.  Oh, no!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 What, whats it, whats going on?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yeah, this has happened before.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 So you know how to fix it?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yep. Put more gas in.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	  Hi! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  Hey.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Hey, what are you doing here?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Well, oh just ah, I was just wondering, when you and I split up, did youget the tape that was half the last episode of M*A*S*H and half the hostagescoming home?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Ah yeah, but now its Susan and me in Mexico and the hostages cominghome.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Wheres Ben?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Hes sleeping.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Ahh.  Ooh, is this a ah, is this a bad time?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Umm, yeah, actually, Susans gonna be home any minute, itskinda an anniversary.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh! I thought you guys got married in uh, January?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Its not that kind of anniversary.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Ah!  Oh.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Sooo!! Anyway...
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Umm, candles, champagne, yeah anniversaries are great. Cause youknow love lasts forever, y'know. Nothing like it in this lifetime, money in the bank, soRachel and I broke up.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Oh God, Ross I am so sorry.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Yeah, well.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Y'know what, I want to talk to you about this so much, but we shouldprobably do it when we could really get into it, are you free for dinner tomorrow night?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh yeah, Id love that.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Oh, great! Me too.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 I guess it all started when Rachel got this new job. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay, yeah.  Triple A can pick us up.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Great!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yeah, what town are we near?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Freemont. West-Westmont, ah Westburg?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  Then why are you answering? Do you at least know what routewere on?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Yeah, we are definitely on Route 27.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay.  We are at a rest stop on Route 27. Okay. There is no Route 27.   Okay, either 93 or 76?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 I dont know, Im sorry, I always slept in the back when wedrove up here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay.  Hey, can you send somebody up and down 76 and checkevery rest stop, and, and also 93?  Okay!  Yeah, no they dont dothat.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Ugh, okay, well somebody will come and save us.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Who? I mean have you seen a car come by here in the last hour and ahalf? I think we should call Ross, maybe he can get a car and come pick us up.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No! No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to livehere! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 But if...
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No you guys, I am not getting in a car with him, youll have tothink of something else.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Oh good, oh Joey and Chandler are back.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 So the going for help went well?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Oh yeah, Smokey Joe here got half way to the highway and collapsed.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 I have the lung capacity of a two year old. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Then why are you smoking?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Well its very unsettling.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 ....right? Right? I mean its pretty unbelievable y'know, I mean theyjust took off, took off without even looking back. Y'know I dont, I dont needthem, huh, Ive got you guys now as friends, you and Susan.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Ah, Susan will be so pleased.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  717?  Wheres 717?  Hey, youve have more of these for Susan right?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 No. But its okay, Ill just put out pickles or something.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	   Ross, thank God.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Pheebs? What, why are you whispering?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 I ate a bug.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	  Hey Rach, the tampons here are only apenny. Lets stock up. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Listen Ross, we ran out of gas, and we dont know where we are, sowe cant get a tow truck.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh, now you want a favour?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yes, please.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Well, oh, Im sorry your car broke down Pheebs, but Im a littletoo busy with some of my real friends right now, but please call to let me know you gothome safely okay?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	   Phoebe,hang on a second.  Here, take my car, go pick up your friends.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 No, Im not gonna pick them up.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Listen, we both know youre gonna do it cause youre nota jerk. Okay? So you can either sulk here for a half hour and then go pick them up, orsave us both time and sulk in the car.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 No, Rachel doesnt want me to....
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Look, I-I-I am sorry that Rachel dumped you cause she fell in lovewith that Mark guy, and you are the innocent victim in all of this, but dont punishyour friends for what Rachel did to you.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Yeah, youre right.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	  Phoebe hang on a second Ross wants to say something. What?   You slept with someone else?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 We were on a break!!! Okay!!  We were, we were...,  yeah. Where are you? Ill find you. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 You slept with another woman?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh, you-youre-youre one to talk.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Okay, done.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	  Whats pleh?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Thats help spelled backwards so that the helicopters canread it from the air!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Huh. Whats doofus spelled backwards?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	  Op, op, car! Car!!  Ugh!!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Oh, its Ross on one of his drives!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler, Joey	 Hey!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Hi!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 What is he doing here?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 He is saving your butt, ah, unless of course Im stepping onsome toes here, in which case I can just mosey on, Ive got plenty of people to helpon the Interstate.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	All	 No! Come on!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 All right!! Fine! Fine.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Arrrghh!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh no, now its not gonna make any sense!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	  You guys, what, what do we do about Ross whodrove all the way up here? What do we do? Just like send him back and were thengonna go skiing?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Oh, this is horrible, its just horrible.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Guys, do you think we should ask Ross to come along?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 I know, what about Rachel? I mean how are we even gonna ask her?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Ask me what?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Umm, if ah, it might be okay if Ross came skiing?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler, Phoebe, Joey	 No, I wasnt gonna ask you that, no.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 You guys are unbelievable. No! He cannot come.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Excuse me?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Its horrible.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  Oh please, cant I come to your special, magical cabin?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Why would you even want to come Ross? Youre a horrible skier.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh-oh, hitting me where it hurts, my ski skills.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 Here we go again.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 I-I cant handle this, you guys.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Y'know what, I can handle it, handles my middle name. Actuallyits the ah, middle part of my first name.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 All right Pheebs, your cabs ready.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 All right, lets go!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Youre welcome.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someoneelse?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 We were on a break!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Y'know Ross why dont you put that on your answeringmachine!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Hey-hey, its valid okay? And Im not the only one who thinksso, Monica agrees with me.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	  What?!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	  I dont know.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Thats what you said last night.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 What I said was, was that I understood. Joeys the one who agreedwith you!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Okay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Really Joey?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	  What?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Y'know what, but there is, there is no right or wrong, here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 No, I think its very obvious whos wrong here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Obviously not to Joey.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	  What?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  Look both, Joey and Monica feel the same way that I do.No-no-no-no.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 Guys, guys, guess who I am?! 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! Hey!!!  Look what youre doing to Chandler!!   Yeah, look, we know this is really, really hard for you guys. Okay?  You dont, all right you dont have to love each other, okay? Youdont, you dont even have to like each other much right now. But please, youhave to figure out a way to be around each other.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Yeah, and not put us in the middle.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Yeah, otherwise, I mean thats, thats, thats just itfor us hanging out together. Y'know is that what you want?  Can yoube civil?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 I can.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay. Good, all right, lets get back in the car, causeits freezing, and my chest is unsupported.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Oh what, wait, wait a second, I mean, what are we doing? Whos goingwith who?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Look, you guys, you guys should go.  No, Im, you, you planned this all out, and I dont want to ruinit, so you guys should just go.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Joey	 Come on man, you drove all the way up here.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 No, no, really, Ive got to take the car back anyway, Imspending all day tomorrow with Ben, Its fine, no guilt I promise.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Rachel	 Thank you.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Monica	 All right, well call you when we get back.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Okay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Maybe we can like go to a movie or something. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Okay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Or, or the rodeo!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 That would be great.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Okay!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Chandler	 I was being Shelly Winters from The Poseidon Adventure.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 I know!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Phoebe	 Bye!!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	  Ugh.  Ross!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  Hi! Sorry Im late. Were you sleeping?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Ahh, nooo!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Oh, great! Listen, oh I had to get you a whole new battery. I got you thebest one I could, cause thats not where you want to skimp.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Youre a genius, Ross.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Yeah, well it came to about $112, but what the hell, just call it an even110?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Okay, Ill pay you tomorrow. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 Okay.
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Okay, bye!!
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	 So they ah, they all took off, it was pretty hard watching them go,y'know?
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Carol	 Yeah, okay, bye. 
03	17	0317	The One Without The Ski Trip	Ross	  So Im gonna take off then!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	  Whats so funny?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Oh, nothing, no. Its an acting exercise, Im practising my fakelaugh.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Oh. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 What-whats so funny?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Gunther	  Oh, no-no, no-no-no, theres none of that in here.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Oh come on man! At least let me finish this last one.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Gunther	 Okay, but only if you give me a drag.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Okay.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Gunther	 Oh dark mother, once again I suckle at your smokey tit. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 No-no, why dont you hang on to that one.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Okay, thats like the least fun game ever.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Well, Im really sick of your smoking, so I brought something thatis going to help you quit. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Oh.  Nope, that patch is no good. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Come on, its a hypnosis tape. This woman at work used it for twoweeks straight and she hasnt smoked since.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Pffhah.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	  Whats your problem?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Nothing, its just that hypnosis is beyond crap.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Hey, that guy did not hypnotise me! Okay.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh right, cause you always pull your pants down at the count ofthree and play Wipe-out on your butt cheeks.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 All right, y'know forget hypnosis. The way to quit smoking is you haveto dance naked in a field of heather, and then bath in the sweat of six healthy young men.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Or what my Father called Thursday night.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Here you go.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh, y'know what, I didnt want cinnamon on this.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Sorry. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	  Hi!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Oh my God!! 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Hi!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Frank! Hi!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 How are you?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 What are you doing here?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Oh, well y'know, I wouldve called but I lost your phone number andthen ah, my Mom locked me out of the house so I couldnt find it. And then, I triedto find a pay phone, and ah, the receiver was cut off. So...
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 What happened?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Ah, oh, the ah, vandalism.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 But, also, what happened between you and your Mom?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Well, we got into a fight cause ah, she said I was to immature toget married.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Your getting married?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Oh, yeah!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	All	 Wow!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 My little brothers getting married!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Oh, I knew youd be so cool about this. All right, ah, hey, do youwant to meet her?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Do I?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Do you?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, I do, yeah.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Okay, cool, all right, she just ah, parking the truck.  Imgonna, Im gonna get my ah, my fiancée man!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Y'know, I wouldve bet good money that hed be the first oneof us to get married.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, isnt it fantastic?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Yeah, ah, but Pheebs dont you think hes a little young toget married?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 What, hes 18.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Exactly, itll be illegal for him to drink at his own bachelor party.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Yeah, or-or to get a hooker.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Always illegal Joe.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	  Hey! Hey! This is ah, my fiancée, Mrs. Knight. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Y'know it-its funny, um, Frank told me so much about you, but yournot how I pictured you at all.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, Im a big surprise.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 So, um, how-how did you guys meet?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Well um, I was in ah Mrs. Knights ah, I mean Alice, sorry, Alice, Ialways do that. I was in her ah, Home Ec class.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 And he was my best student.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Yeah, she was my best teacher. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Ohhh. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 If that doesnt keep kids in school, what will?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 And so now you guys are gonna be married?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Yeah. Y'know we-we talked about just living together, but um, we want tohave kids right away.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh my God!! Great!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Wow, kids. Frank, are you sure youre ready for that?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 I mean, how hard can it be? Y'know, I mean, y'know, babies, y'know whodoesnt want babies right? And besides y'know, I never had a Dad around, and ah,now-now I always will, cause y'know, itll be me. Right?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Y'know, I mean, really we do realise that theres an age differencebetween us.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Oh good! Okay. Cause you were acting like you didnt.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Oh no, but when it comes to love, what does age matter?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Hypnosis Tape	 You are falling fast asleep. Deeper. Deeper. Deeper. You are nowcompletely asleep. You dont need to smoke. Cigarettes dont control you. Youare a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 And y'know what, I just realised, in the last year Ive only goneout with two guys, Richard and Julio. You gotta help me out here, you gotta set me up, yougotta get me back in the game.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Well, that shouldnt be a problem. I mean I work in fashion and allI meet are eligible straight men.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	  Pete, can I get you something else?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Yeah, a slice of cheesecake and-and a date if youre givenem out.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Havent you and I covered that topic?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Hmm, come on, you just said to her that you.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Aww, the only reason you want to go out with me because my blond wig,and the big boobs, and the fact that I serve you food.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Well, if that were true, Id dating my Aunt Ruth. And the two timeswe went out were just plain awkward.  Come on, you think she should go out withme, dont you?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	  Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? I meanthat aint a pretty picture in the morning, yknow what I mean. That wig all indisarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 I mean really, think about it.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Ho-ho, I will.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 No, I know, I know, that this is Franks life,  y'know. Y'know, I dont want tobe all judgmental, y'know, but this is sick, its sick and wrong!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Pheebs, what, is it the age thing?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 No-no, oh, Im fine with the age thing y'know, until it startssticking its tongue down my little brothers throat! 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Pheebs, he seems to enjoy it.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 But, I mean, do you think hes gonna enjoy it when hes up tohis elbows in the diapers from all the babies they have to have right away?! This is notfair to Frank,  andit-its not fair to the babies, and y'know what, its not good home economics.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Well, have-have you told him how you feel?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yes. Not out loud.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Pheebs, if you dont tell him, soon hes gonna be married, andthen youre gonna hate yourself.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, but if I do tell him, then hes gonna hate myself. I meanlook at him and his Mom, I cant.  But, you guys can, please you gotta talkhim out of it.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross, Joey	 No-no-no-no-no. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Come on, you guys, you have nothing to lose, I have everything to lose.Do you want me to lose everything? Everything?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross, Joey	 No.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Okay, Im gonna go get Frank. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 So, were walking down the street and I turn to you and I say,Hey, lets go hang out at Totally Nude Nudes, remember? And then, andthen, you turn to me and say, Nah, lets just hang out at your place.Well, that was a nice move dumb ass. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 I think you should definitely go out with this guy.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Nah, he doesnt do anything for me.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Well, umm, Walker was looking for this big bus load of kids. All right, I get your point.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 All right.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	  Hi.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Hey.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Y'know, I forgot the combination to this about a year ago? I justcarry it around. Do you have any Chap Stick?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Uh, yeah.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Hey, how are those tapes working out for ya?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Y'know what, pretty good.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Yeah?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Good! I havent smoked yet today, I feel great, and-and-andconfident, that is a stunning blouse.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Thank you.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Here you go.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Thanks
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Hey Mon, lets give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seemsreally nice, and that check thing was adorable.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 What check thing?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 As a joke, this customer at work who has a crush on me gave me a $20,000tip. His number is on the check, he just did so Id call him.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	  Pete Becker. Pete   Is this him?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Thats Bill Clinton.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Whos he huggin?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Oh my God! Thats Pete! But why is Bill huggin Pete?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 This guy invented Moss 865! Every office in the world uses thatprogram!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 We use it!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 There you go!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh my God, Monicas gonna go out with a millionaire. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Im not gonna go out with him.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh my God, I cant believe this is a real $20,000 check, oh this isjust so exciting.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Or incredibly offensive.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh yeah, sure, that too.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	  What?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 All were saying is dont rush into anything.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Yeah, come on, think about it. Youre 18, okay, shes 44, whenyoure 36, shes gonna be 88.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 What, you dont think I know that?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Look, the point is, theres a lot of women out there you haventeven had sex with yet!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Yeah, he-hes right, hes right. This is your time y'know, yeah,youre young, youre-youre weird, chicks dig that.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Okay, but isnt sex better when its with one person that youreally, really care about.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Yeah, in a poem maybe.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 No the mans right, thats what I had with Rachel.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 You dont have it anymore?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 No, I ah, I slept with someone else.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Okay, so wait, all right, so how does that make things better?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 It didnt.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Okay, so what you used to have with Rachel, is what Ive got withAlice.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Now, wh-what, what is that like?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Its so cool man, its so, its just cause beingwith her is so much better than like not being with her.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Yeah, yeah.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	  Why cant I find that?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Dont ask me, I had it and I blew it!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Well, I want it!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 You can have it!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 I dont know, maybe I cant. I mean, maybe theressomething wrong with me.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Oh, no! No!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Its out there man! Ive seen it! I got it!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Then you hold on to it!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 All right, man!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 All right, congratulations you lucky bastard! 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	  Youre Franks best man?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 I couldnt help it, there love is so pure.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Well then,  what about you?! Huh?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Im the ring bearer.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Hi! Oh, Alice, hi! Thanks. Im so glad you could come, causeIve got a real umm, Home Ec emergency. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Oh my God, who died on this?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know. Its a real mustard-tastrophe. Can you help me?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Absolutely. Okay, first well start with a little club soda andsalt, and then if that doesnt work we can go back to
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Y'know what, forget it. Its ruined. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Oh no-no, never say that. If we cant get it out then we can cutaround the stain, add a little lace, you make a stylish throw.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Or instead, maybe you could just not marry my brother Frank.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Okay, thats great, but can we make it smaller? Can we make it fit onthe head of a pin? I love when we make things fit on the head of a pin.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	All	 Got it. Yeah all right. Yeah, okay.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Secretary	 You have a Miss Monica Geller here.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Uh, absolutely, yeah, sEnd her in.  Hi.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 What the hell is this? 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Hang on a second.  Ill-Ill talk to you inthe morning.  Im sorry what?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Seriously, what is this supposed to mean?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Well, yknow, I never know how much to tip.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Youre supposed to double the tax. Not double the tax of Romania. Imean, whats-whats the deal? Are you, are you trying to buy me? Is this the wayyou get girls to go out with you?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Employee	 Umm, Im still here.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	  Youre taking this all wrong. Because, if Ididnt leave you that tip, you wouldnt of come down here, we wouldnt behaving this argument, and there wouldnt be this ah, heat between us.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 What?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Come on, you gotta admit that our relationship is ah, is hitting a newlevel now. Cause you used to be like the chef, and I was the customer, and nowwere like this-this couple that fights.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Okay, umm, youre a loon.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Look, forget the check, okay.  I like you. I thinkyoure great. Come on, what do you say?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 I dont know.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Why not?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Cause I dont want to encourage this kind of behaviour.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 One meal! Thats all Im asking for. Please? We go out, we eat,and if you dont have a good time, I give you ten grand, we call it even.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	  Hi.  Wait, no!Just put the mail down. Its-its me!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Okay. Whoa, sorry. Why were you just like all in the dark?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Oh well, um, your, your laundry just smelled so good, that I thoughtId curl up in it. Is that all right?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, sure. So, how was your day?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Oh, well just probably the worst one since Ive been alive.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 What umm, what happened?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Umm, Alice ah, she ah, called it off.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Oh no. Did umm, did she say why?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Uh, no, not really, just that I was too young, y'know, but I dontsee how I could all of the sudden be too young, cause Im older than I was whenwe first got together.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah, no, I dont, I dont know. But, y'know what, maybeits just all for the best?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Yeah, if the best is like unbelievable pain!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Oh, sweetie, oh. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Y'know, I just was finally happy y'know. For the first time in my life!After my Dad left me, and then, and then getting arrested for stealing those birds, andthen, and then the whole punctured lung thing! I can, its still really hard to takedeep breaths in cold weather, but with Alice all that stuff kinda went away. And nowits, and now its gone and I dont know why!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Uh, well I can tell you why. Its, its because of me. But,y'know what, I only did it because I love you. Okay?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 What?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Umm, well I, I kinda had a little chat with Alice, and I sort of madeher see why you two shouldnt be together, y'know. And youre gonna see it to,one day, you really, really will.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Wait a minute, wait, this is because of you?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Okay.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Well, you, wait no, my Mother didnt want us to be together, but theworst thing she ever did was tie me to the porch. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Okay, but.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Wait, y'know what, I-I came to you because I thought youdunderstand! Oh no!! Y'know, I would storm out of here right now if-if I had some money, ora place to go
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Oh my God! The millionaires here!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	  Oh my God! 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Guys, please, Im just gonna have dinner with him. Okay?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Okay, okay, just because he buys you dinner, does not mean you owe himanything.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 I know!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Chandler	 Okay, then get the lobster!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	   Hey!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Hi.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Hi!!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Hey!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Ross	 Hi!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Hey, how much cash do you got in your pocket right now?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 And thats why, Im not inviting you in for a drink.  Bye.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	All	 Oh-no-no-no-no.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Rachel	 Just one drink?!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	  So, where do you want to go?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Hey, you like pizza?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Oh, thats sounds great.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 I know a great little place.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Youre, hey, youre not paying for the pizza!
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Oh come on, its only fair, you paid for the flight. Now is, isthat enough lire?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Ahh, Id throw another thousand on that.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Monica	 Why, how much is that?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Pete	 Thats about 60 cents.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	 Every night!! 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Hypnosis Tape	 You do not need to smoke. Cigarettes dont control you. Youare a strong, confident woman, who does not need to smoke. A strong, confident woman, whodoes not need to smoke. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Hey, Frank. Look, okay, I know that you think I did like this totallyevil thing, but I so didnt. Theres someone here who can explain this betterthan I can.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Hi Frank.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Frank	 Hi, Mrs. Knight.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Phoebes right Frank. I know its hard to hear, but itwouldve been wrong to go through with it. I-I-I was being selfish, even though we,we want the same things now, in the future we may not.  Is that it, is thatwhat it is?
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Yeah, but not just that.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 Right, not just that. Umm, even though we love each other as much as wedo, none the less
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 None the less.
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Alice	 None the less. Umm, youre too young to, to really know what youwant. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Phoebe	 Thats right, exactly.  All right, its a good byekiss, thats good.  Bye-bye.  Okay, no, the important thing is thatyou see what Im saying, y'know, just y'know, this is clearly wrong.  Okay, Ive decided Im gonna let this happen! Okay, can I just get mypurse?  Okay, all right, good. .
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Hypnosis Tape	 Cigarettes dont control you. You are a strong,confident woman, who does not need to smoke. 
03	18	0318	The One With The Hypnosis Tape	Joey	  Joeys your best friEnd.You want to make him a cheese sandwich everyday.  And you also want to buy himhundreds of dollars worth of pants. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Gunther	 Here you go.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Thank you.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Gunther	  Say Rachel, I was wondering if youd like to goto a movie with me sometime. As my lover! Nnnsch, to out there. Maybe youd just liketo ah, get something to eat with me sometime? As my lover.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	  Hi!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Hi! All right, lets go shoppin!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Um, y'know, before we go ah, theres something I need to say.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh, okay.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Ive kinda of had this ah, this crush on you.  Butsince you were with Ross, I-I didnt do anything about it. But, now that yourenot, Id really like to ask you out sometime. So-so thats-thats whatIm doing, now.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Wow! Umm....
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Gunther	 I dropped a cup.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 ...so y'know, thats why, within a few years, that voice recognitionis gonna be pretty much standard on any computer you buy. Y'know, so you could belike-like, Wash my car. Clean my room. Its not gonna be ableto do any of those things, but itll understand what youre saying.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Oh, this is so great.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Yeah, it was.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 All right then.  Bye.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Hello, people who do not live here.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	All	 Hi! Hello!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 I gave you a key for emergencies!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 We were out of Doritos.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Hey, howd the date go with Mr. Millionaire?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Mr. Millionaire, new from Snooty Playthings! Third wife soldseparately.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Hes great! I mean we have such a good time together! Hes sofunny, and sooo sweet, and Im not attracted to him at all!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Still?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Noo!! Its driving me crazy. I mean every other way hes likethe perfect guy, he has everything. Plus! He actually has everything.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Life-sized Imperial Storm Troopers from Sharper Image?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Two.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Wow!! Can Joey and I put them on and fight?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	  Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big oldbaddie! Oh mommie, oh daddie, I am a big old baddie! 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 I guess he musta gotten the part in that play.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica, Phoebe	 Oh.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Yeah, either that, or Gloria Estefan was right, eventually, the rhythmis going to get you.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 Joe. Hows it going?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Good.  Hey.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Hi.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, so youre playing Adrienne, huh?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Yes. Are you one of the retarded cousins?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, no. Ah, I playing your husband, Victor. Im Joey Tribianni.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Hi, nice to meet you. Kate Miller. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 So the ah, plays pretty great, huh?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Oh, yeah. I love Jennifer Van Murrays work. Shes sobrilliantly incisive when it comes to deconstructing the psyche of the American middleclass.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, forget about it. She rocks!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Where do I know you from?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Dr. Drake Remoray. Days of Our Lives. Voted most datableneurosurgeon by Teen Beat.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 No, thats not it. So, youre a soap actor? Well this must bepretty exciting for you to be in a real play, hmm?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Hey, Ive done plays before. Im a serious actor.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 That info-mercial! For the milk carton spout thing!Youre-youre-youre the guy that doesnt know how to pour milk!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 See, I actually can pour milk, but I got you believing that Icouldnt. Now, see, thats acting.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Right, at the end, you choked on a cookie.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Yeah, that was real.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Wow! I cannot believe Mark asked you out.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 I know.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 What, so what are you gonna tell him?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Well, I told him I would think about it, but Im gonna tell him no.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Huh.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 I mean I think Id say no to anybody right now.  Oh, but it was so strange. I mean Imstanding there with this charming, cute guy, whos asking me to go out with him,which Im allowed to do, and I felt guilty. Y'know, like Id be cheating on Rossor something.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Wow. So, okay, maybe that means that, youre not over Ross yet andyou have issues with your father.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 I dont have any issues with my Father.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Okay, so its probably just the Ross thing then.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 I hate this woman!! I hate her! She told everyone in the company aboutthat info-mercial, and now they all keep asking me to open their drinks. Okay, andwhenever I cant do it, theyre all like-like laughing at me.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	  Hello.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler, Joey	 Hey!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 So Rachel called. Wants to see me. Going over in a minute.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Wow, what-what do you think she wants?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Well, maybe the crazy fog has lifted and she realises that life withoutme.... a-sucks.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Its possible. You are very loveable, Id miss you if Ibroke up with you.  I was just trying to be supportive.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Then be supportive like a guy.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	  If I broke up with you, Id miss you.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Hi.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Hi!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 You ah, wanted to see me?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Yeah. Ahh, heres a box of your stuff. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 What?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh, y'know, its just like hats, and a shirt, and CDs, justsort of stuff that youve left here.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 What are you doing? Are you trying to hurt me? Or something?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 No. Ross, it, it just seems that y'know its time we-we y'know,move on. I mean, I mean dont you think?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Yes. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Yeah?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Yes, I do.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Good.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Yeah, I-I really do.  Hey! This-thiswas a gift?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Its still a gift! I got it from the gift shop!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Okay, all right, give me the mug! Ill keep the mug.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 No!! Y'know-y'know dont do me any favours. In fact, where,wheres the rest of my stuff?! Huh? Like-like my umm,  Hey, thisbook is mine!! And-and-and, and that T-shirt you sleep in? Id like that back too.Yes, I do.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 You know how much I love that T-shirt! You never even where thatT-shirt!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Im just trying to help you, move on.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh, you are a petty man. You are a petty, petty....
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Petty...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Petty... 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Petty...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Petty...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Petty...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Small...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Small... 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 You are so just doing this out of spite.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Awwwahuh, no, no, no!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Huh?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Im-Im gonna wear this all the time! I love this shirt!! 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15!! It doesnt evenfit you anymore!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Oh, yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	  yeah-yeah-yeah!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Oh-oh, okay, okay!  If you dont mind Imgonna the rest of my stuff, and relax, in my favourite shirt.  You have apleasant evening. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 So, youre like a zillionaire? 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 And youre our age. Youre our age.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Y'know what, you should like, you should buy a state and then just nameit after yourself.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 What like Pete Dakota?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Yeah, or, or, or, Mississ-Pete.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, oh, I got it! Pete-Chicago.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Thats not a state Joe.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, and Mississ-Pete is?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 I got to go, so ah, Ill see you guys later.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	All	 Okay.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Youre our age!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	  So ah, we on for tomorrow?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Absolutely!  Now get out of here you!!   Okay, Im runningout of places I can touch him! Look, is there something wrong with me? I mean why am Ionly attracted to guys where theres no future? Either theyre too old, ortheyre too young, and then theres Pete whos-whos crazy about me,and whos absolutely perfect for me, and theres like zip going on! I mean,seriously, does it sound like somethings wrong with me?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Yeah, kinda.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Happy?! Is that what Im supposed to be Vic? Happy?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh?Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and nothin. You lookat me, and its nothin.  Nothing.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 Tasty! Im really starting to feel like you guys have ahistory, its-its nice.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 I have a question about this scene.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 Yes?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Well, I dont understand why Adriennes attracted to Victor.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 Peel the onion. First of all, hes good looking.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Yeah.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 I think my characters gonna need a little bit more of reason thanthat.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, hey, how about this one. Ah, its says so in the script! Y'knowah, I-I dont know why my character likes you either, I mean it says in the scripthere that youre a bitch.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 It doesnt say that in the script.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 It does in mine!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 I can blow dry it. I can put gel on it. It doesnt matter, Istill wind up with this little  cowlicky thingon the middle part of my head. Its so annoying. Does it bug you?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 You bug me.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Is there any chance you didnt see that?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Ross! You gotta stop! Okay?! You cant just stare through thepeep hole for three hours! Youre gonna get peep eye!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 I knew it! I knew it! I always knew she liked him! Y'know, shed sayno, but here we are! Right? We just broke up, first thing she does!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 You didnt just break up.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Hey, its been like three weeks!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 You slept with somebody three hours after you thought you broke up. Imean bullets have left guns slower!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Here they come, here they come. Oh-ho, if she kisses him goodnight,Im gonna kill myself, I swear. I cant, I cant watch this.  Come on, date over! Date over! Uh-oh, here we go,shes going in.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Okay.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Shes going in. Wait! Hes going in! Hes going in!! Thedoors closed! I, I cant see anything but the door closed!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 And the inventor of the door rests happily in his grave.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Okay, I have to do something. I mean, I have, I have to stop it!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Stop what?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 I dont know, but I ah, I have the feeling that my being there willdo it. Ill go over and I will borrow something. Juice!! I need juice!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 No!! You cant!! 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Look, they must be stopped!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 I am your friend, and I am not gonna let you do this!! You are surprisinglystrong!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 I need juice! People need juice!!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Look man!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 People need juice!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Listen to me!!  
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Juice, I need...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Shes moving on! Okay, if its not this guy, its gonnabe somebody else! And unless youre thinking about subletting my peep hole, youare going to have to get used to the fact that the relationship is over! Okay, man?Its over.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Yeah, okay. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Okay. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Ross	 Its just I miss her so much.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 I know.  
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Why do all youre coffee mugs have numbers on the bottom?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh. Thats so Monica can keep track. That way if one on them ismissing, she can be like, Wheres number 27?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Y'know what?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 No. And I dont think Im gonna want to.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 I cant do this.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Yep. Yep, thats what I didnt want to know.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Well, oh, Mark, Im doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know?Im just doing it to get back at Ross. Im sorry, its not very fair toyou.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Ahh! Fair, schmair! Y'know? Look, if you want to get back at Ross, I amhere for you. Really? No-no, I say-I say, I say we get back at him right on this couch.Right here!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh God. Im sorry about this.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Thats okay.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 You sure?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Mark	 Yeah. I can just go home and get back at him by myself.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Spokeswoman	 ...has become the penicillin of the twenty-first century. And sotoday, this hospital is about to take major steps toward leading that revolution. It istruly ironic, on one hand consider the size...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	  Hey, can I ask you something?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Sure.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Where are we? 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	  Well, with all these doctors and nurses, Im gonnasay, midget rodeo.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Just tell me the truth.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Okay. Umm, y'know, I dont think, I dont think I told youthis, but umm, I just got out of a really serious relationship.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Oh, yeah. Wasnt that like a year ago?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 So I did tell you. Okay, y'know, that really isnt the thing. Umm,the thing is that, right now Im just in a place in my life where I need to focus onme. Y'know what I mean?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Oh, yeah. I know that.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 I so wanna be attracted to you.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 But youre not. Okay, good.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Im sorry.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Y'know what, dont be. This is not, dont be, causeits not so bad.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Its not?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 I know Im no John Bon Jovi,  or someonewho find attractive, Im just, I think, y'know, that you might end up feelingdifferently.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Well, um, look I-I dont want this to come our wrong, but ah, youseem awfully confident for a guy I just told I wasnt attracted too.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	 Yeah, stupidly charming isnt it? Well listen lets, youwanna get something to eat? Cause this place is kinda depressing. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Spokeswoman	 And the man who made all this possible... Mr. Peter Becker.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Pete	  One second.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 I dont think this town is big enough for both of us to relax in. Draw!!  
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	  I wasnt doing anything.  Uh-oh, what did she do now?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Just because she went to Yale drama, she thinks shes like thegreatest actress since, since, sliced bread!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Ah, Sliced Bread, a wonderful Lady MacBeth.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 God, I just, I hate her! I hate her!! With her, Oh, Im sotalented. and Oh, Im so pretty, and Ooh, I smell sogood.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 I think somebody has a crush on somebody.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Hey, Chandler, can we please stay focused on my problem here?! Y'know?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Im talking about you. You big, big freak.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh.  Ohh. Ohh, youre out of your mind.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Hey, you have nothing but talk about her for the last 48 hours! If youwere in a school yard youd be pulling her pigtails and pushing her down now!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Oh, yeah?! Then how come I keep thinking about her in all these sexualscenarios and stuff huh?!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Happy?! Is that what Im supposed to be Vic? Happy?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Well, why dont you tell me what youre supposed to be! Huh?Because I sure as hell cant figure it out! I talk to you and its nothin.You look at me, and nothin.  Nothing.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 You guys make me fly! High! Okay, were gonna pick it uphere, tomorrow.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Well, that was ah...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Better?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Yeah! Yeah, it was definitely an improvement. Gnight.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Ah, Kate? 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Yeah?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 You ah, you forgot your shoes.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	  Im probably gonna need those. Huh? 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Hey, listen you ah....
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Hmm?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 ...feel like getting a cup of coffee?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Umm.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	  Kate?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Yep.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	 You ready to go?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 Yeah.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	The Director	  Very nice. Very nice. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Kate	 So umm, Ill see you tomorrow, huh?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Joey	 Yeah, yeah sure, goodnight.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	  Hey!  Why isnt itSpiderman? Yknow like Goldman, Silverman...
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Cause its-its not his last name.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 It isnt?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 No, its not like, like Phil Spiderman. Hes a spider, man.Y'know like ah, like Goldman is a last name, but theres no Gold Man.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. There should be Gold Man!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	  Hey!
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Hey, Rach, how was work?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh, great. Although I did sit down where there wasnt a chair.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 By the way, Ross dropped by a box of your stuff.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	 Oh, well, I guess I had that one coming. Im just gonna throw itout, its probably just a bunch of shampoo and... 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Monica	 Something wrong?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Rachel	  No. Nothing. 
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 So, ahh, what kind of powers would Gold Man have?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Okay well, he would turn things to gold.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 What about things that are already gold?
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Ahh, his work is done.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Chandler	 Okay, lets play my game now.
03	19	0319	The One With The Tiny T-Shirt	Phoebe	 Okay. All right you yellow-bellied-lilly-livered-DRAW!! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Wait a minute, wait. Youre telling me this actress person is theonly woman you ever wanted who didnt want you back?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Yeah! Oh my God!  Is this what its like to be you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Wow, youre really crazy about her, huh?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Oh, you have no idea. And-and when were on stage I get to-to kissher and-and touch her, but then she goes home with the director, and its likesomebodys ripping out my heart!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Oh, its so great to see you feeling like this!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	  Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	All	 Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Monica, uh Dad called this morning and ah, Aunt Silvia passed away.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Yes!! Yes! Yeah, yeah, yeah!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 We were all pretty shaken up about it.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Wait, am I missing something though? Cause I thought death wassomething thats supposed to be sad, in a way.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Well ah, Aunt Silvia was, well not a nice person.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Oh, she was a cruel, cranky, old bitch!   And Im sorry she died. Did Dad say I get the dollhouse?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 You get the dollhouse.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 I get the dollhouse!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Wow, a house for dolls, that is so cool! When I was kid, I had a barrel.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Uh, Pheebs, you had a barrel for a dollhouse?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 No, just a barrel.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Y'know what, you can play with my dollhouse.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Really?! Really?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Any time you want. Y'know, when I was younger, all I wanted to do was toplay with this dollhouse, but no!! It was to be looked at, but never played with.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 My Grandmother used to say that exact same thing to me.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Hey, Sophie!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Sophie	 Hey, Rach!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Hey.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Sophie	 Hey.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Thanks for lunch, Chandler. Y'know, you didnt have to walk me allthe way back up here.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Oh, thats-thats okay, no problem. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Honey um, honey, you do realise that we dont keep the womenslingerie here in the office?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Yes, I realise that.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Summer catalogue! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Thats the stuff! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Rachel, I need the Versachi invoice.  Hello! Youdont work for me.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing Joanna.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Bing! Thats a great name.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Thanks, its ah, Gaelic, for Thy turkeys done.So ah, Im gonna go, nice, nice meeting you.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Me too.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Bye, Chandler.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	  So ah, whats wrong with him?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Oh, nothing, hes just goofy like that, I actually, hardly noticeit anymore.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Oh no, no-no-no, is he ah, married, or involved with anyone?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 No!! No! Hes not married, or involved, with anyone!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Oh, Rachel,  actually, y'know what, forget it.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Well, Ill ask him for you, if you want me too?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Would you? Or, is it just to sad and desperate, and y'know somethingthat Sophie would do?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Sophie	 Uh, uh, uh, I am here.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 I know that.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Look at it! Ohhh! Wallpapers a little faded, thats okay.Carpets a little loose. Hardwood floors!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	  Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Hello.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Oh! Ooh! Oh Monica! Its so beautiful.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 I know!!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 So, Im here, ready to play.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Okay.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 I brought a bunch of stuff for the house, so check it out. Ha-ha. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Whats this?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Thats a dog, every house should have a dog.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Not one that can pee on the roof.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Well, maybe its so big because the house was built on radioactivewaste.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	  And is this in case the house sneezes?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 No, no, thats the ghost for the attic.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 I dont want a ghost.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Well, nobody wants a ghost. But youve got one, because the houseis sitting on an ancient Indian burial ground.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Wait a minute, the house was built on radioactive waste, and an ancientIndian burial ground? That would never happen.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Okay, obviously you dont know much about the U.S. government.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	All	 Hello.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 I need to talk to you!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Sure, whats up?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Oh, sorry. I meant Chandler.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 I-I know. Well if something comes up... 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Oh, I'm glad you guys are past that little awkward phase.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Okay, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions aboutyou...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Oh-ho, liked what she saw, huh? Dug my action, did she? Checkinout the Chan-Chan man!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  That was  surreal. Okay, what do think? Are youinterested at all?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Yeah, she seemed cool, attractive. Ill do it.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, shes gonna love me.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	  Okay, dinosaur attack!! Quick, everybody into thehouse!! Ahh-ahh! Roof! Rrroof-roof-roof!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Okay, Phoebe, y'know what? That-thats it, thats it, allright? No dinosaurs, no ghosts, no giant dogs, okay? Theyre not the right size,theyre not Victorian, and they just dont go.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Okay,  fine. Come dinosaur, were notwelcome in the house of no imagination.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Uh, Pheebs, while were hovering around the subject. I just have tosay dinosaurs, they-they dont go, rrroof!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 The little ones do.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hey, Kate!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Morning.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Listen, I ah, went to that restaurant that you were talking about lastweek...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	The Director	 Hey, lovely! Come, talk to me a minute! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  And I ate the food, I had the fish, it was good, yeah. It wasgood, yeah...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Woman	 Hi, oh, Im Lauren, Kates understudy.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Oh, hey! Joey Tribbiani.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 I know! I-Im a big fan of yours.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  What?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 I used to umm, schedule my classes so I could watch Dr. Drake Remoray onDays of Our Lives.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Get out of here, really?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Absolutely!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Yeah? 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Oh but then, they went and dropped you down that elevator shaft.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 They gave me the shaft all right.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	  Oh, youre so funny. Listen, umm, what are you doingafter rehearsals? Do you want to get a drink, or something?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Well Ahh,  yeah! Yeah, sure, adrink sounds great.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Cool! I-Ill see you then.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 All right.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	The Director	 All right, its time to act, my talking props. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Hey! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	All	 Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Look everybody, look at my new dollhouse!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Wow!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Look, look! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Hey, whats this?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, its the slide instead of stairs. Watch this. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Its very interesting, Phoebe.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Whats this?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 The Licorice Room, you can eat all the furniture. And, when guests comeover, they can stay on the tootsie roll-away bed.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 This is the coolest house ever!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Hey, does anybody want to join me in the aroma room? 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 All right!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 I would!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Hey, guys, guys, did you see my new, china cabinet?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross, Rachel	 Uh-huh.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Watch, watch. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross, Rachel	 Ooohhhh!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 And, and! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross, Rachel	 Ahhhh!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	  Hey, my Fathers house does that!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  O-o-o-okay, how did it go? Tell me everything.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Well, the movie was great, dinner was great, and theres nothinglike a cool, crisp New York evening. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Hmm.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Of course, I didnt get to enjoy any of that, becauseJoannas such a big, dull dud!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Chandler is fantastic!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 What?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Oh God, we just clicked! Yknow how people just click? Like he cameby to pick me up, and I opened the door, and it was just like, click! Did he tell you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Oh, I....
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Oh, and hes got such a good heart! Doesnt he have a goodheart?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Oh, I know...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Oh, I know and hes soo sweet! Listen, he said he was going tocall, so put him straight through.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Sophie	 Isnt this great?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Dont spoil it.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	The Director	  Hello. Oh! Its you. Just ah, justone-one sec.  I am going to take this call. When I continue, I hope thatthere will appear on stage this magical thing that in the theatre we call, committingto the moment! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  That guys like a cartoon. What do you see in him anyway?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 He happens to be brilliant. Which is more than I can say for that sweateryoure dating.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hey, Im not interested in her sweater! Its whatsunderneath her sweater that counts. And besides, since ah, since when do you care whoIm going out with?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 I dont care. Why, do you want me to care?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Do you want me to want you to care?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Do you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 What?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	The Director	  Okay, Im afraid to say this, but lets pickit up where we left off.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Come on baby, dont go. Please? What do you say?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Ive got no reason to stay. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	The Director	 Stop!! Stop it! You must stop! You are bad actors! This is aterrible play! Ill see you in the morning. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 I cant believe we go on in, in a week.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hey, its gonna be all right.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	  Hey! So since were getting off early, do you want to goand paint mugs?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 What?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 You know! At the place I told you about last night?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Oh, yeah, with the mug painting. Yeah. I was so listening to that. But ah,y'know what, I think I kinda need to work on my stuff tonight.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Oh, okay.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Okay. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Ill see you tomorrow. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Okay.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Gnight. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  Ah, are you okay?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Yeah, I guess. Look, what are we gonna do about this scene, huh?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 I dont know.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Well umm, maybe if it had more heat.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 How do you mean?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Well, Adrians looking for a reason to stay, right? Victor cantjust kiss her, hes gotta, gotta really give her a reason, y'know?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Maybe he could slip her the tongue.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Or maybe, maybe he could grab her, and, and, and, and lift her up.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, and then Adrian, she maybe she could wrap her legs around hiswaist.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 And then she could rip off his shirt and kiss his chest, and, and hisstomach!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 And then, then he could use his teeth, his teeth to undo her dress, and,and, and bite her!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 And then right, right when the scene ends, he could take her with thisraw, animal....
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Something like that?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Yeah, thats pretty much what I had in mind.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Yeah.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  Hey.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Hi.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  Hey. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Hi.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hey.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Its a little early to be drinkin.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 No-no, things ah, finally happened with Kate.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Ohhhhh!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Youre kidding?! Thats great!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Oh, it was so amazing. After the  love making...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Oh my.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Yep. I just, I just watched her sleep for like hours, just breathing inand breathing out. And then I knew she was dreaming cause, cause her eyes keepgoing like this. 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	  Im telling ya, Joannas got it allwrong. Okay? All I said was, This was fun. Lets do it again sometime.Ill give you a call.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Ohh, gee. I wonder why she thinks youre going to call her?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Thats what you say at the end of a date.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 You cant just say, Nice to meet you, good night?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 To her face? Look its the end of the date, Im standingthere, I know all shes waiting for is for me to say Ill call herand its just y'know, comes out. I cant help it, its a compulsion.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Come on Rach, when a guy says hes going to call, it doesntmean hes going to call. Hasnt it ever happened to you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Well, they always called.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Hmm, bite me.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	  Did he call?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 No. Sorry.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Why?! Why?! He said hed call. Why hasnt he called?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Sophie	 Maybe hes intimated by really smart, strong, successful women.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Sophie, would you please climb out of my butt. Why hasnt hecalled, Rachel? Why?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Okay, okay. Umm, well ah, maybe he, maybe he feels awkward because youare my boss.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Awkward? Why should he feel awkward?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Well...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 The only person that should feel awkward is you, and you didnttell him not to call me, did you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 No. I...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Because if you feel uncomfortable with your friend dating someone youwork for, there are always ways to fix...that.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  Call her! Call her now!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Multiple, so many paper cuts.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Why hasnt he called Rachel? Why? Why? I dont understand.Why? He said hell call. Why? Why? Chandler Im telling you she has flipped out,shes gone crazy!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	  Oh, well give me the phone then.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Come on, this isnt funny. She thinks its my fault that youhavent called her. You have to call her!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Look, you cant call somebody after this long just to say,In case you didnt notice, I dont like you!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Well then youre going to have to take her out again.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Nooo!! Shes really dull! And she gets this gross mascara goopthing in the corner of her eye!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 I dont care! I dont care! You are going to have to take herout again and end it, and end it in way that she knows its actually ended. And, Idont care how hard it is for you, do not tell her that you will call her again!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 All right! Fine! But its just a lunch date, no more than anhour! And from now on I get my own dates, I dont want you setting me up with anybodyever again!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Thats fine!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Thats just a lot of big talk, y'know.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 I know.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Mon?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	  Im in the shower!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Oh, fire! There, theres a fire! Fire!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hey.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Hi.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 So I ah, talked to Lauren, kinda told her how things were with us. Did youah, did you talk to Marshall?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 About what?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Y'know, about what happened with us.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Nooo. And theres really no reason he should find out, so ahlets not make a big deal about it, okay?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 What are you talking about? It was a big deal. I mean, come on youcant tell me last night didnt mean something to you. I-I was there,youre not that good an actress.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Look umm, I, I was, I was just caught up in the moment. Thats all itwas. Joey, Im-Im sorry you feel bad, but havent you ever sleep with awomen where it meant more to her than it did to you?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Nooo.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	  Hi, Kate!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Kate	 Hi, Lauren.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	 Hi, Lauren.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Lauren	 Hi, pig!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Sorry I ah, I scared you in there.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Oh, thats okay. By the way, I was just checking the showermassager.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Yeah.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	  Hey!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	  I tried to reach you at work. Theres....been afire.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 What?! Oh my...  Oh my God!! Whathappened?!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 Well, we believe it originated here.  In the Aroma Room.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 All right. Did everyone get out okay?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Monica	 Well, the giraffes okay. And so is the pirate.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	 Ohh. What is this? 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Ross	 No Phoebe, dont look! You dont want to see whats underthere!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Phoebe	  Ohh, the-theFoster puppets! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Its not a big deal. Its, just its right here, and its all the time.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Well, thanks again for lunch.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	  Yes, this, this waspleasant.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 It was, wasnt it?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 The food there was, was great.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Wasnt it?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 So take care.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 You too.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Well, this was great. Ill give you a call. We should do it againsometime.  
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Great! Im looking forward to it. Rachel, any messages?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Sophies desk.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	  Chandler!! Are you gonna call her!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Noo! 
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Chandler!!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Look, Im sorry. Okay? Im weak, and pathetic, and sorry.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Rachel	 Okay, you are going to tell her and youre going to tell her now.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 AhhhhIm not going to call you.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 What?
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Im sorry. Im-Im-Im sorry that I said I wasgoing to when Im not. Look, this has nothing to do with you, y'know? And thisisnt Rachels fault. Its me. I have serious, serious problems when itcomes to women. I have issues with commitment, intimacy,  mascara goop. AndIm really sorry, its just that this is not, this isnt going to work out.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 Well, this isnt how I was hoping how this would end, but I guess Ihave to appreciate your honesty.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Yeah, o-okay.
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joanna	 So...
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Chandler	 Well this is great! Ill give you a call! We should do it againsometime!
03	20	0320	The One With The Dollhouse	Joey	  Well, so anyway Beth, what Im saying is I shouldveconsidered your feelings before I went home with you that night. Ive ah, Iverecently learned whats it like to be on your side of it, and Im sorry. So, doyou think you can forgive me?  Great. Thanks. Okay, bye.  Hello, Jennifer?  Oh hi, Mrs.Loreo, is Jennifer there?  Oh, shes not home huh?  Well ah,actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 So whos idea was it to put everybody in the diner on skates?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh, some idiot customer put a suggestion in the suggestion box.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Oh my God, they took my idea!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 That was you?!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Yeah! Okay, here you go. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Gunther	  Rachel, I made you a cocoa. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Oh my God, are you guys okay?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Gunther	 Are you all right?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Oh my.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	  Hey.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hey. Y'know with that goatee you kinda look like Satan.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Oh, so thats why the priest threw holy water on me. Okay, listen, you have to cheer up! Okay? Youshould come out with Ross and me, I mean anything is better than sitting around herecrying all day about Kate.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hey I was crying because, because nobody believed Quincys theory.Okay?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Hey.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Im gonna be on TV!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 No way!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Yeah! Theyre putting together this panel to talk about these fossilsthey just found in Peru and The Discovery Channels gonna film it!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Oh my God! Whos gonna watch that?!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Thanks. You ready to go?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Yeah. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Saw a girl with that vest.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Thanks. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Anchorwoman	  While most of us think of chocolate bunnies and baskets astraditional Easter gifts. Some people insist on giving live chicks as presents.  Unfortunately, the sad fact remains that most of these little guyswont live to see the fourth of July.  Because of as a result of improper care, they will be dead.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Yeah, hi. You guys got any of those baby chicks? Cause Iwas watching this ah, commercial on TV and man, those guys are cute!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Hi!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Hi! Hey, Pete youre back! Hey, check this out. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Wow! Skates! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Wow! Youre a lot sturdier that Chandler. He crumpled like a pieceof paper. So how was youre trip?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Well... 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh, whatd ya bring me?!  Awww, hoteltoiletries from Japan. Oh, these are gonna go in my permanent collection. You want somecoffee?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Yeah, sure, thatd be great.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	  Regular or decaf?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Ah, which ever is closest. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 So ask me what I did today.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 So what did you do today Pete?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 I bought a restaurant and I would like you to be the head chef.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 What?! Oh.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Can you believe he just offered me a restaurant?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 What a jerk! You want me to kick his ass?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 I mean this has been like my dream since I got my first Easy Bake Ovenand opened Easy Monicas Bakery. I mean I would kill for this job. I mean I cantotally do this job, and God knows I paid my dues.  ButPetes just doing this because he has a crush on me.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 And youre still not attracted to him at all?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Hmm, no. I mean how can I accept a restaurant from him? I-I-I-Icant. I couldnt even accept a necklace from Stu Vincent in the seventh grade.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yeah, but Mon thats totally different. He was youre healthteacher.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh, please. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 What? Honey.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh, I am, my side still hurts from when you crashed into me yesterday.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh God, Im so sorry.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 I know. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ow!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh God!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Hey, you guys!Guess what?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Got a job on a river boat?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Y'know what I didnt wear this suit for a year because you hated it.Well, guess what? Youre not my girlfriend anymore so...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh I see, so this suit is making a point.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Right.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Now that youre on youre own, youre free to look asstupid as you like.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  You like it right?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh absolutely. I like it even more on you than I did on Colonel Sanders. Ross! Ross! Im kidding!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yeah, come here!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 What-what was it you were gonna tell us? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yeah. Oh! Was how you invented the cotton gin?!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay, good bye! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 So um, after you put the suggestion in the box, how long did it takefor the roller skating thing to happen.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Umm, oh, about three months.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Okay, so I guess thats about ah, two weeks before the toplessthing kicks in.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Hey!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 I got you something! Open it! Open it!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Okay.  Its a chicken.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Its cute, huh?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, you guys, do you know anything about chicks?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Fowl? No. Women? Nooo.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Okay, well they are a huge responsibility, especially at this age. Theyrequire constant care. They-they need just the right food, and lots and lotsof love.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Oh, well no problem there. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Easy Lenny.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 So? I mean have you thought about it?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay. Heres the thing.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Oh no, not the thing. I hate the thing. Whats the thing?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 I cant do it. Im sorry, I wish I could, but umm, see youhave these feelings for me....
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Wait, wait, wait, wait, thats-thats what youre worriedabout? If thats the problem, weve got no problem.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Huh?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 No! Look, I was gonna tell you this over dinner, but I met somebody else.On my trip.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Her names Ann, shes a journalist. Ahh, we met on the plane.She asked me if she could finish off my peanuts, I thought she said something else, we hada big laugh. Yeah, I just, I mean I got, I got tired of waiting.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh, thats great! I mean Im-Im sorry, but Im sohappy for you. And now I can work for you!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 I guess you can.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh my God! Oh, this is incredible! Ohh!  All right, y'know what? Im just gonna roll right into that officeand-and quit!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 All right.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay.  Can you give me a little push?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Yeah, sure. Good luck!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	  Im quitting!! Woo-hoo!  Im okay!! Im all right!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	  Wow! Thats exciting, you went to Japan, made up a woman.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Im just saying, this woman, I mean shes fictitious. No?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Why would you say that?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Cause youre still into Monica. So you told her there wassomebody else so she would agree to work with you, so cause you figure oh if youspent a lot of time together, maybe something might happen, and...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Youre good. Youre good!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Yeah, no, Im fairly intuitive and psychic. Its a substantialgift.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Listen, can you promise me that you wont tell her though?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Absolutely, oh I promise. Tell her what?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Thanks a lot.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No Im serious. I mean Im intuitive, but my memory sucks.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Okay, but this is the last time.  With a chick-chick here,and a chick-chick there. Here a chick, there a chick, everywhere a chick-chick--chickeeeen.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hey.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Hey.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hows she doing?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 She?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Well yeah, dont-dont you think its a she?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I dont know.  I cant tell, what ever it was wentback in too quickly.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Well, anyway, I got to go change, Im ah, meeting some of the castfor drinks.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Excuse me?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I stayed home from work today while you were at rehearsal so somebodycould be here with our chick!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hey! Who was up from 2 oclock this morning until 5 oclock thismorning trying to get her back to sleep?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 You dont think I get up when you get up?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Ohhh, here it comes.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Yes, here it comes! Im stuck here all day, and then you come inand spend two seconds with us and then expect to go off gallivanting with your friends?Well I dont think so mister!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Hey!! I need to relax! Okay? I was working all day!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 And you dont think taking care of our chick is work?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Thats not what I said. Okay, I just meant...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I know what you meant!!  You notice that ever since we got thischick, weve been fighting a lot more than we used too?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 I dont know, maybe we werent ready to have a chick.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Ill take her back tomorrow.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Do you think well get our three bucks back?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Ohhh, hey! All right, listen, I-I have that TV thing inlike two hours, and I need your help, okay? What do you think?  Thisblue suit, or this brown one?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Well, the brown one brings out your eyes, but your butt looks great in theblue one.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Really? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Oww! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Wow! That aspirin dance really works!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Oww!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Oh my God, is that still...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Im fine, Im fine.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 No youre not.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yes I am! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rach!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Look, Im fine. Watch. Look at that. Whoa-whoa!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Okay, okay. Look, you have got to go to adoctor! Okay?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 No. I have got to get ready and go to a dinner at my bosseshouse. Its a very big deal, theres a lot of people there I have to meet.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 And Im sure youre gonna make a big impression. Hi! ImRachel Green. Its nice to meet you.  Come on,you probably have a broken rib!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Well, I will go to the hospital tomorrow, itll still be brokenthen.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rach...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 But y'know, I could use a hand getting ready.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rachel...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Look, either help me or go.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Fine. Ill go.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Okay, but before you go, could youhelp me first?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Sure. Ill help you.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	  Oh, good! Good! Do you guys know how to get a chick outof a VCR?!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Y'know what? I cannot do this with my left hand!Would you please, help me with this too?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Ohh. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  Okay. Lets use this brush. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay. This stuff? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 All right.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Careful. Light. Okay, do you know how, just sweep it across the lid.Okay? Just sweep it.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Oke-dokey. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh-ho!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Sorry.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Hey! Thats just poking me in the eye!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Sorry, Im sorry. Close, close, close...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay, just sweep it.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Im sweeping...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Right.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Sweep, sweep....
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay, now make it even, cause we dont...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 What? What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 We dont want it-it to be too much, we want it to be subtle.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 No. No, y'know you dont, you dont wear enough of this.  What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Since when, since when do you think I dont wear enough of this?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Well I, close your eyes, I just think youre gonna like this a littlebetter, cause, close-close... 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Blow it.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Sorry. Cause umm, I think this will make you a littlemore sophisticated.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Sophisticated like a hooker?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Hey! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Hey, guess what Im doing tonight.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Im checking out the restaurant with Pete.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Ohh, Monica, I am so excited for you.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 I know.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Ooh, I have to tell you something.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 But I cant tell you.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, but wouldnt it be easier if you had to tell me somethingthat you could tell me.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Well, sure in a perfect world. But, no, I promised I wouldnt tell,and I swore to like all my gods.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay. Does it have to do with Ross and Rachel?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Does it have to do with Joey?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Does it have to do with-with Chandler and that sock that he keeps by hisbed?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No, but lets come back to that later!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 There you go! Good enough for your party, huh?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Sure.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Yep?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Sure, Ill just sit next to the trans-sexual from purchasing.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay, come on! All right, I gotta go! So good luck at the party. Okay?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh wait, Ross, would you just stay and help me get dressed?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Sure, okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay. Okay, great! Umm, okay, just turn around.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 I dont want you to see me naked!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rachel, Ive seen you naked a million times. I ate hot fudge off younaked. Remember, I-I sucked that mini-marshmallow out of your belly button?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Yeah, but that was different. Yknow? I mean, we were, we weregoing out then, now I think its weird.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rach, y'know I can see you naked any time I want.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 All I have to do is close my eyes. See?  Woo-hoo!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ross! Stop that!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Ah, Im sorry.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Come on! I dont want you thinking of me like that any more!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Ahh, sorry, nothing you can do about it. Its one of my ah, rights asthe ex-boyfriend.  Oop, oh yeah!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Stop it! Cut it out! Cut it out!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay, okay, Im sorry, it will never happen...  Uh-oh!Wait a minute! Wait-wait, now there are a hundred of you and Im the king. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Rosss...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Come on, would you grow up? Its no big deal.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 All right.  Fine.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Yowzah!!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 O-kay!! See what you did, Im gonna be doing it by myself now.Okay? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Aww, come on.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Thats it.  Ow!!! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Oh my God!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh-ow!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 All right.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ow!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Look...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ow!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ow!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rach?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ow! Ow!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Easy. Easy. You have to go to the hospital. Okay?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay, I do. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 I really do.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay, Im gonna get your coat and then Ill-Ill put you ina cab.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay. Oh wait, wait-wait, youre not gonna come with me?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Of course I am. I just have to make a call.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Okay? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Thank you. Oww!!!! God!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  What?! I wh-, whats wrong?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Im sorry, I just cant go to the hospital lookin likethis.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Does it involve travel?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Noo!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Does it involve clogs?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Oh, wait, wait. Clogs, or claws?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Clogs.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Claws?!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 No.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, so it doesnt involve Ross or Rachel or Chandler or Joey.But, what about Pete?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	  No!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 What is it?! What about Pete?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 I dont know! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, I feel like Im talking to Lassie. All right, Phoebe wouldyou just tell me!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 I cant!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, I gotta go. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 I, but youre so close! No!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, does it involve something to do with Petes computer company?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Phoebe	 Oh, just go. Youre never gonna get it!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I know. See, yes. Thats Yasmine Bleeth, shes a completelydifferent kind of chick. I love you both. But in very different ways.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Hey!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Ohhh.  Ahh! What are you doing?! I thought you were gonna take her back to the storetoday.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I did! But the store wouldnt take her back! So then I took herto the shelter, and you know what I found out? 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 If they cant find a home for her, they kill her! And Imnot gonna let that happen to little Yasmine!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Okay, good, good, good, cause, good, cause I was kinda havingsecond thoughts too. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Okay. And its not just chicks y'know? Its all kinds ofother animals!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Thats horrible! Well, you did the right thing man.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Thanks, Im glad you see it that way.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Ohhh-hoo, funny story!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 I dont believe this! Wow, look at this refrigerator! Itsgigantic! I mean I could live in this thing! Id be cold, but Im always cold.Oh my God, look at these spider burners! I love spider burners.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 So you like it?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh, it is sooo perfect. Thank you so much. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Oh, youre welcome. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Did you just smell my hair?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Nooo. Uh-huh, no way. What? No.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Oh God.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 You still have feelings for me dont you?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Now, nooo! Im just excited about the restaurant, thats all.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Pete.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Okay, I love you. Is that so bad?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 No, its not bad. Its not bad at all. Its-itsreally nice.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Look, the only who stands to get hurt is me. And Im okay with that.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 You may be okay about getting hurt, but I am not okay with being the onewho hurts you. Thats why I cant take this job.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 And well, we probably shouldnt see each other anymore. Imsorry.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Okay, yeah. I mean... If thats, if thats really what you want,okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 Okay, bye. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Pete	 Im sorry things didnt work out...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Monica	 All right shut up for a second and let me just see something.  Oh, wow! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay, youd tell me the truth. Right?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Rach, you cant look fat in an x-ray.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Okay! Now you stay out here, and you think about what you did!!
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  Thats a duck.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Thats a bad duck!!!  Howd the thing go tonight,Ross?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Oh, it was, nah, well....
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 What thing? What thing?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Nothing, ah there was this thing at the museum. Come on.  Easy.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	  Okay, now when you come back I hope you remember that,that chick is not a toy! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 What thing? What is this thing?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 I was kinda, supposed to be on TV tonight for The Discovery Channel.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh my God! 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Yeah.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Ross, why didnt you tell me that?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 Eh, cause I knew that if I told you, youd make me go, and Iknew you needed someone to be with you tonight. Come on. Come on.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 I cannot believe you.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 What?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 That is the sweetest thing, I just....
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	  You should get some sleep.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Okay.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 So, Ill umm...
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry I spoiled youre evening.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Ross	 No, thats, no, as long as youre okay. So Ill ah,Ill see you tomorrow.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	 Um-hmm, yeah.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Rachel	  See ya.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	  What did you do?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 What cha doing?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Having a swim.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 What about the chick?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Chicks dont swim.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Are you sure?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 I dont know. Should we try it?
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	 Sure.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 See, I told you they dont swim. 
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Joey	  Wait. Give him a minute.
03	21	0321	The One With The Chick And The Duck	Chandler	 Noo!  Oh, its okay, its okay, baby, baby,baby.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? I was supposed to call my Dad backlike two hours ago.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, he clipped on, he said call him as soon as you get a chance,hes at Flimbys.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Whats Flimbys?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, thats the word I use when I cant remember the realthing.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Okay. Hang up! Thats it! Come on!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 No! Rachel, thats what they want me to do. My warranty expirestomorrow, if I dont get through, theyre not gonna fix my crappy, broken phonefor free! We cannot let them win! Its us versus them!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Ye-e-es!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  Hey.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	All	 Hey. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Uh, listen I gotta double check for tickets tonight. Who-who got what?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel	 I had one.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 I need two. Im bringing Pete. My boyfriend. I have a boyfriendnow!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Two it is. Ross, how about you?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Uh, yeah, I ah, I also need two.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Really? Whos number two?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Whos number two? One of the more difficult games sewer workersplay.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Uh, no, its-its just this person.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Like a date type  person?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Yeah, kinda. Its this woman from work. I hope that wont be tooweird. Will it, Rach?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 No. No, not at all, not at all. I actually was gonna bring someonemyself, so
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 But you said one.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 I meant, me plus one!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Okay.  Did ah, you guys mean you plus one?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 All right, Ill see you tonight.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Okay.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Okay, bye-bye!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Bye!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Bye-bye!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Okay, I need a date! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, hey, you guys are finally gonna get to meet Kate!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	All	 Oh!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  And I ah, borrowed some of your cologne. I hope she likesit.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Joey, what are you doing?! Its never gonna happen, shesseeing somebody.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Yeah, and I dont have any cologne.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 The green bottle next to the shaving cream.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Oh! Worm medicine for the duck.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	  Here you go. You can wear this. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Thanks!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Uh-huh.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Okay.  Ooh, Im setting the phone down.  ButIm still here! Just dont go anywhere Im still here.  Dont-dont switch or anything, cause Im, Imright here. Just one sec. One sec! One second!!  Wait! One second! Just
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Phoebe?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 What?! Monica, Im scared!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 All right. Honey, thats-thats a sleeve. Okay? 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Yeah.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 And! We also have speaker phone. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Hold Voice	 Please, stay on the line. Your call is important to us.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Okay, wait, you gotta hang up cause were gonna be late.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Hold Voice	 Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Yes!! Yes!! Im the next caller! You were gonna have me hang up.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	  Hey! Can you take a duck and achick to the theatre? 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Of course not.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 No.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Okay. I just wanted them to hear it from somebody else.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Hey, hey Rach!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Hi!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 How are you? 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Good.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Hey.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 So its looks like were the first ones here.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Yeah, looks that way. First ones here! Wooo!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Yay!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Oh! Tommy, this is Ross. Ross, Tommy.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Hey.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Hey. Oh, Im sorry, this is Cailin.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 And! Break!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Okay, uhh, I think Im going to run to the ladies room.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Okay.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	 Ill join you.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Ill get our seats.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Okay.   So uh, well, this-this is uh, this isawkward.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Yeah?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Well y'know cause Rachel and I used to go out.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Oh, I didnt, I didnt know that.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Oh! Well then this is awkward. So what do you uh
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 I think were here.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Oh! Yeah. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Yeah.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Okay.  Uh, huh. Excuse me,Im sorry, I-I think you may be in our seats.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Man	 Umm, no, I dont think so.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Can-can we take a look at your ticket?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Man	 Sure. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	  Yep! Yeah, see this says D-13, and uh
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Man	 Oh, well I thought that ah
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Oh, you thought, huh? Yeah, well that didnt really work out toowell for you did it you idiot!! What are you?! A moron!! Huh?! It says D-13! Okay?!Look youre surrounded by even numbers!! Did that give you some clue?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Man	 Uh, the usher told us to come
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Oh! Oh! The usher must be right! What, with all that training they gothrough! Get out!!  Here!   Hey man, you want the aisle?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 No, Im good. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	  There he is!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Theres our star!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 So, so, whatd ya think?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Almost as good as that play with the two naked girls on the see-saw.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 I-I wasnt in that.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 I know.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  Oh-oh, hey-hey, Kate! Listen I want you to meet everybody.Everybody, this is Kate.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Hi!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	The Director	  Excuse me. Excuse me.  Sweetheart!  Come! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 So thats the girl you like.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Yeah.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	  Im telling you, this guyRachel is with is crazy! Okay? He viscously screamed at total strangers! I think hesbaaad news!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Wait a minute, wait a minute, you dont like the guyRachels dating? Well, thats odd.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, hey, Lauren. Uh, you guys this is, this is Kates understudy,Lauren.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 Hey.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Hey. Gosh, you look soo familiar.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 Oh, yeah! I-I ran into you in the hallway in your building. It was rightafter I slept with Joey. He dumped me the next day.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	 So. Howd you guys meet?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Pete	 Well ah, the short version is, I ah pursued her for a couple of months,then I gave her a check for 20,000 dollars, and she was mine.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Yeah, and in the long version, I dump him for telling people the shortversion.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Estelle	 Joey, sweetheart, you were fabulous! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Hey you guys, this is my agent, Estelle.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Estelle	 How do you do.  Ooh, you two girls wereoutstanding!  Did they have representation?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 No, they-they werent in the play.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Were not actors.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Estelle	 Ooh, what a shame! Because with her face  and herchest  I could really put something together.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Could I borrow it?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	  Hi! Remember me?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Hi! Yeah! Tommys in line for the bathroom and someone just cut infront of him, I think hes gonna snap. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	 Ross, Im gonna go.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Go? Why?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	 I dont know. Could be because I dont feel like standingaround all night waiting for some guy who may or may not scream.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 But-but Cailin, he definitely will scream.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Cailin	 Good bye Ross.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Uh, oh-ho bye.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	The Director	  Here we go people!  Boxing Day! The Lucille Lortel Theatre, blah-la-la-la Ah-ha! JoeyTribianni, gives an uneven performance, but Mr. Tribianni is not the worst thing in thisproduction.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Yes!!! Ha-ha-ha!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	The Director	 Kate Millers awkward and mannered portrayal is laughable. Badda-badda-badda. Ah-ha! Here it is! The direction byMarshal Talmant is Thank you, boys and girls, youve ruined my life. Please, stuff your talentless faceswith my Mothers crab cakes!  Excuse me!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Anyone mind if I save this?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Hey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Hey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Oh, is the play over?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Yeah. Where were you?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Hold Voice	 Thank you for your patience, youre the next caller.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 You were the next caller five hours ago. You must be going crazy.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Nah. I kept myself busy.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, yeah.  I put your stuff in her room, and her stuffin your room.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Hey! Are you okay?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Fabulous.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Listen, drama critics theyre nothing but, but people whocouldnt make it as actors. You know what you should do?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Become a drama critic!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	The Director	  I am hurt!  A plague on bothyour houses! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 By the way, he dumped me tonight after he read my review.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, classy. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Yep! I sure know how to pick em, huh? Y'know I gave up a part on asoap for this!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Wow! Yeah I ah, I gave up a job too.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Really. What?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Uh, de-clawing cats. Hey, tell ya what. Let me walk you home. Wellstop by every news stand and burn every copy of their Times and the Post.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Why the Post?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, you didnt see the Post?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 No. You?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 No. Why?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	  So you really think those newspapers are just jealous of me?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, absolutely! Youre talented and youre good looking.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Oh, youre sweet and cute.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 I know! Thats why they trashed me!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Whoa. Wait a minute, wait a minute.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 What?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 I, I dont get you. I mean first, you hate me. Then you sleep withme. Then you want nothing to do with me, now you want me again.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 What? So you never went out with an actress before?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Kate, do you even like me?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Of course I do.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Well so, how come you blew me off? Y'know? How come you were with him?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 I dont know! I just, just do this! I-I always have to pick the likethe smartest guy, or-or the most talented guy Why cant I just pick someonelike you?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Thanks.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 You know what I mean. I mean like the sweetest guy. Joey, youre justso, youre so, so 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  Okay. Okay, okay,hey.  There we go, lets get your feetup there.  Good night, Kate. Sweet dreams.  Imgonna put this can right here in case you have to hurl.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Hold Voice	 Please stay on the line. Youre call is very important to us.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	  Pheebs, youve been up for 24 hours! Goto sleep, honey. Th-this isnt healthy.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 No, no, Im fine, and yknow why? Cause of all theriboflavin.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  Hey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Hey! Didnt you have that outfit on last night?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Yeah! I stayed at Kates, but ah, nothing happened. Hey, Pheebs,where were ya?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Im so, so, so sorry, Joey. I definitely am gonna see youreplay. I swear youre play is very important to us, thank you for your patience.Youre play is the next play is the next play Im gonna see.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Anyway, how did it go with Kate?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, it was great! Yeah, I-I walked her home, and it was amazing how muchwe connected, y'know? Then ah, then she passed out, but then she woke up. Yeah? And westayed up all night talking, and now were like totally crazy about each other!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Joey, you had the night! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 What?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 When two people finally realise their feelings for each other, and-andthey talk for hours, and they-they learn all about the other person!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 You-you think?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Did you like learn about her family?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Two brothers, one died!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Yes!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Yeah?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Oh! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Gunther	  This is from the woman at the bar.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Oh-ho-ho-ho. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Gunther	 Sorry. She thought you were somebody else.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 What time is it?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 One.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 One.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 7:15.  Watch doesnt work.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Tommys supposed to be here soon, were going to lunch.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Look. Look, I wasnt going to say anything to you, but... All right,I dont think you should be seeing Tommy anymore.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 You dont?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 No! The guy is mean. I mean really mean. I think you should stay away fromhim.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Umm, or, maybe, I should stay away from all men.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 No, its not just cause Im jealous.  I mean Im not, Im not, Imnot jealous, okay? Its Look, the guy, he screamed, he actually screamed atthis couple sitting in our seats.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Yeah, and at the end of the play, he, he got up y'know, and he juststarted like,  banging his hands together!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Okay, fine, fine. You dont want to believe me? No, thats fine.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Were kidding!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Ross, dont. Ross!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 You dont want to believe me, Im Mr. Funny to you. Mr.Funny  
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Whoa!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Whoa, sorry Tommy.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Whats in the cup, Ross?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Umm
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 What is in the cup?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Okay, its coffee.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Ice coffee? Tell me its ice coffee!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Its-its hot
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Hot coffee!!! You idiot!! You were gonna spill hot coffee all over me,huh?!! What are you just some big, dumb, stupid, doofy idiot, with a doofy idiot hairdo,huh?! Huh?! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	  Whats your favourite thing about summertime?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Umm, going to the beach. When it stays light real late.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Yeah
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	   Hey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Tommyyyy! Say, whats your favourite thing about summer?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Ooh, I dont know. Probably the smell of freshly cut grass.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Ohh, thats a good one.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Sorry! Sorry, Im late; sorry, Im late! My duck and my chickand a fight, it-it was ugly.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Stage Manager	 Look, we held the curtain for you buddy. Come on, lets go!Lets go!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	  Vic! Where have you been, baby?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	    Wheres Kate?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	  She got a job in L.A.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  What?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 Ive been waiting up all night for ya. Where have you been?  Where have you been? Vic?!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Oh, ahh, go to the window. Im wanna run down to the truck and showyou something.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	  What do yougot down there, Vic? What do you got under that tarp? 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  When is she leaving?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	  Tonight. What are you doing?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  Im coming up!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Hey, mind if I use the phone?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Oh, I 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Why dont you use ours across the hall, causeshehasproblems.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	  Oh-ho, whoa! Sorry, Tommy. I almost spilled this hot coffee on you.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Yeah, but you didnt.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 No, but its-its-its hot!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Ross, would you just stop it! Its getting really old.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 I cant believe no one believes me!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 I do, I believe you.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 You do Pheebs?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Yeah. But I also believed her  when she said I wasnext.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	  Ooh, hey! Hey, there little fella.  Mr. Fuzzy-Man, how are you doing?  Aww.  Eww! Oh! Eww! Gross! Idiot!! Stupid little, fuzzy, yellow creature!! Oh look at me,Im so cute, Im a little chick whos disgusting! God, youre sostupid, how are you not yet extinct!!   Quack-quack, quack-quack!! What are you quacking about?! Dumb Donald Doo-Doo!! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 Step away from the duck.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Tommy	 Ooh, sorry little Mr. Chic-A-Dee, sorry you went doody in my hand!  Well, I guess were not going out anymore.Whaa!!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Joey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Hey!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Im soo glad I caught you, I couldnt find you before.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Wh-wh-whats going on? Wh-whats this about L.A.?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 They still want me for General Hospital.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 But, but wh-what about us?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Last night was wonderful. But I-I cant stay here just for you.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Well, so, stay for the museums! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Im sorry.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Stage Manager	 Joey, onstage!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Well can you at least stay to the end of the play? I mean, Ill go tothe airport with ya, I-I wanna say good bye.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	  Where are you Vic?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Kate	 Flights in an hour. I-I gotta go.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 Vic! Vic! Vic!!! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	  In a minute!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 So this is it? Victor?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Joey	 Yeah, I guess it is.  Listen, I ah, Igotta say good bye, and-and I gotta say it quick cause this is killing me. One thingyou gotta know, is that I will never forget you. But, youve got things you have todo now, and so do I. And so Im gonna get on this spaceship,  and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when Ireturn, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. But I wont have aged at all. So you tell your great-great-granddaughter to look me up, becauseAdrienne, baby, Im gonna want to meet her. 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Lauren	 So long, Vic! 
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 Phoebe, its been two days.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know. Oh, good thing its one of those 801 numbers. Right?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Ross	 Phoebe, 800 is toll free, 801 is-is Utah.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 No, no, no, oh no-no-no, its has to be 800.  Cause all those big companies have 800numbers, every one.  Yeah, every big Utah-based company has one.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Rachel	 Phoe-be!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Sorry, Im so sorry, I will pay you back.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Chandler	 And yet, shes still not hanging up the phone.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	All	 Hang it up! Hang up the phone!!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Fine! Fine!  Oh-oh!
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	 What?
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Phoebe	 Well, I think I broke it. But thats all right, heres thenumber you can call.
03	22	0322	The One With The Screamer	Monica	  Oh.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Hey, wouldn't be cool if our duck and chick had a little baby? We couldcall it Chuck.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Or... Dick.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	  Hey.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler, Joey	 Hey.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Listen, I-I need a favor. Umm, I was in the shower, and as I was cleansingmyself, I ah, I-I, well I felt something.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Was it like a sneeze only better?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 No, no, I mean, I mean a thing on my body.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	  What was it?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Well, I don't know, it's-it's kinda in a place that's not... It's notvisually accessible to me, and I was hoping maybe you guys could-could help me out.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler, Joey	 Whoa!!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 No!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Come on you guys, it's no big deal! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Whoa-heeeiiiiii-iiiii-ah!!  Huh.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Well what is it? Is it a mole? 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 No, it's too wrinkly to be a mole.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Well, eww. What? Is it a pimple?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 No, it's... fancier than a pimple. Look Ross, why don't you just gosee a 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	  Hey guys! What's... 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Okay, well, it's definite, two more weeks of winter.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Ahhh.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Yeah, right.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Okay, and then this is the coffee house. This is where Iplay my music. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Good deal.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, and these are my friends. People. This is Vince, Vince the people.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Hi!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Hey!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Hey!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Vince is a fireman.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Wow! Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building before?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 98 hot saves, highest in the force.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Well, y'know if Joey and I played with matches we could get you up toan even hundred. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	  Fire safety is not a joke, son.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 You're right, I know.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	  Look, I gotta go. I'm on call tonight.  See youSaturday. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Okay. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Wow, he's cute, Pheebs! But I thought you just started dating thatKindergarten teacher.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Oh, Jason? Yeah, uh-huh, we're seeing each other tonight.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 What-Pheebs?! Two dates in one day? That's so unlike you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 I know, I know! I'm like playing the field. Y'know? Like, juggling twoguys, I'm sowing my wild oats. Y'know? Y'know, this kind've like y'know oat-sowin',field-playin' juggler.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 So Pheebs, do they know about each other?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Does a dog's lips move when he reads?  Okay, no they don't.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	  Hey guys!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Hey.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Hi!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	  Well?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	  Okay, how'd it go at the doctor's?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Well, he said there's definitely nothing to worry about, it's totallybenign.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Well what is it?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 He couldn't even tell me! He said it was just some sort of skin...abnormality. And the worst thing is he-he-he said, he said, without being able to identifyit, he was reluctant to remove it.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Y'know what? You should go to my guy, because when I went in therewith my third nipple. He just lopped it right off. Y'know? So I guess I'm lucky. I meannot as lucky as people who were born with two nipples.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 At least they knew what yours was. Y'know, yours had a name.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Oh! Maybe they'll name yours after you! Y'know, they'll call it, The Ross.And then people would be like, "Awww, he's got a Ross."
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	  Yeah, that'd be cool!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Pete's breaking up with me.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	All	 What?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 I just checked my messages, and he said that when he gets back fromAtlanta, we need to talk.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 And?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Well that's it. People never say `We need to talk' unless it's somethingbad.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Whoa, that doesn't necessarily mean that he's breaking up with you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Really?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Yeah, maybe he just cheated on you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 ...and I know I'll never miss doing it, but I gotta tell you, it's prettycool knowing that you're making a difference in a kid's life.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 That is so great! Oh, I...  Oh my God!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Whoa!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Oh my God!!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Ahh-ahh, we'd better call the fire department!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  No! No! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 No, no?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, we don't n-n-n-n-need a fireman, we'd, we'd like a good mechanic. Oh my God, here they come! Well, we gotta get outof here!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 W-w-w-wait! Why?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well look, if I wanted to see a fireman, I would date one. Okay? 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Th-th-that's all it is, a third nipple. Y'know? Just your run-of-the-millthird nipple. Y'know? You can take it off. Just slice that baby right off!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 Take your shirt off, and let's see what we're dealing with here. What are you doing?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Just showing you my run-of-the-mill-slice-it-right-off third nipple.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 Well that's not a third nipple.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 No?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 First of all, it's on your ass.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Well then, what is it?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 Wait a minute, hold it.  Johnson!Will you come in here a moment?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Johnson	 I'm with Hamilton!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 He's good with rear things, bring him in too.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	  I gotta go water Pete's plants.  Y'knowwhat, if he's gonna break up with me, maybe I won't water his plants.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Well, if he's gonna break up with you, maybe Joey and I should waterhis plants. If y'know what I mean.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Or ha-ha, we could go over there and pee on them.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  and I-I can't take it! Y'know? I'm just,always afraid one of them is gonna catch me with the other one. It's making me crazy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Well honey, then why don't you break up with one of them?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Uh.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa. What ah, what happened to playing the field?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, it just, it doesn't feel like playing anymore, it feels like work.It's like I'm working in the field.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 So Pheebs, pick one of them.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Yeah. Which one do you like more?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, Vince is great, y'know `cause, he's like a guy, guy. Y'know? He'sso burly, he's sooo very burly. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Okay, good, so there you go. Go with Vince.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, but Jason's really sensitive.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Well sensitive is important, pick him.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Oh sure, go with the sissy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Jason is not a sissy!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Oh no-no-no-no, I meant Chandler.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Y'know I have dinner plans!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Dr. Rhodes	 Thank you soo much for coming on such a short notice. Ladies andgentlemen, I've-I've-I've been practicing medicine for twenty-three years, and I'mstumped. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	All	 Whoa. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Okay, this is the den. All right, check this out. Lights!  Whoa! All right. Less lights! Bad lights!Lights go away!  Oh, see you just need to find the right command.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Yes, and the dimmer switch.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Whoa! For a rich guy he's got, that's a pretty small TV.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 No-no-no, that's a video-phone. But hey guys you're not supposed to behere, so please, do not touch anything.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	  I-kea! This is comfortable.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	  This place is amazing.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 God, that is the nicest kitchen.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 I know.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 No! But it's the nicest kitchen, the refrigerator told me to have agreat day.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Look at this! A millionaire's checkbook.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Joey, put that down!  Oh my God! It's Pete. Okay, getout!! How the hell do you answer a video-phone! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Monica? 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 I guess that's how.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Hey Monica, how's it going.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Oh its umm, good! It's umm, its good, just here watering theplants.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Well don't forget that fiches over there by Rachel.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	  Ahh... Chandler's on the couch!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 I see him, you guys are just the worst hiders ever.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	All	  Hey Pete.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Hi, how ya doing?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Ahh, Pete, the other day when you said you needed to talk, umm, just soI know, is it good news or bad news.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Oh, it's good news. No, it's definitely good news. Hold on a second, Ihave another call.   Hey, how's it going?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Oh no-no-no, it's still me.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Ah, no it's not. I've got picture-in-picture here.  Yeah. Yeah, okay. I'm gonna have to call you back later.  Monica? You. I'mgonna have to call you back.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Oh, oh, okay umm, so I'll see you soon.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Okay, I love you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 I love you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	All	 I love you, love you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Okay. Well, it's good news. It's good news.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 So, what do you thing the good news is?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	  Wow! Look at this! He wrote a check for 50,000dollars to Hugo Ligrens Ring Design.  Oh, sorry, what do you think thegood news is?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Oh my.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Monica's gonna marry a millionaire!!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Hey, you gotta get Mom on the phone. Call Mom! Call Mom!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete'S Mom	 Hello.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 And that's Pete's Mom. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Mon you definitely have to make it a theme wedding, and the theme couldbe, Look how much money weve got! Y'know, I mean you could put, youcould put money in-in the invitations! You-you could have like little money placesettings. And ah, you could start with a money salad! I mean itll be dry, but peoplewill like it.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Would you stop? Weve only been going out a couple of weeks, I meanwe dont even know if hes gonna propose.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Yes, but this is Pete. Okay? Hes not like other people, on yourfirst date he took you to Rome. For most guys thats like a third or fourth datekinda thing.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Well if-if thats what it is, then its-its crazy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Monicas right. Were talking about getting married here. Okay?She-she cant just rush into this.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Oh please, what do you know! You married a lesbian!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 All right. I gotta go. I have break up with Vince.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	 Oh, so youre going with the teacher, huh?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, I like Vince a lot, y'know? But, its just Jasons sosensitive, y'know? And in the long run, I think sensitive its just better thanhaving just like a really, really, really nice  butt.   Jason! Definitely Jason! Okay, wish me luck!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	All	 Good luck!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 OH MY GOD!!!  Sorry, I was just imagining what itd be like to catch the money bouquet. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Excuse me. Umm, is Vince here?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Fireman	 Oh sure. Vince?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Yo!! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Wow! I didnt know you guys actually used those. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 So, whats up?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Umm, wow. This-this isnt gonna be easy. Umm, I dont think weshould see each other anymore.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Uh-huh. G-good deal.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Im sorry.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 No-no its okay. Its just that ah, I thought we had somethingpretty special here. And y'know I-I felt like you were someone I could finally open up to,and  That theres so much in me I have to share with youyet.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Oh my God, I didnt
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	  Im sorry, I cant talk. Im gonna gowrite in my journal. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Wait-wait-wait! Wait!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Im telling you, if you want to take care of that thing,you should go to my herbal guy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Thank you, but I want to remove it Pheebs. I dont want to make itsavory.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Y'know when girls sleep with guys with weird things on their body, theytell their friends about it.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Gimme this. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	  Hi! Okay, dont be mad at me, but I couldntresist.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Brides magazines?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Yes, and I know that youd say no if he asked you, but Imsorry; how great would you look walking down the aisle in this Donna Carin. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Oh, you so would! Oh, you should get that anyway.  Like for clubbing. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 It is so weird, I know what I said, but uh, this morning, I was lying inbed I was, I was imagining what it would be like to say yes.  I know its a little sudden, and its a little rushed, andits totally not like me to do something like this, but that doesnt mean Icant. Right? I mean Im-Im crazy about Pete, and I know that we want thesame things, and when I thought about saying yes, it made me really happy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Oh my God.  
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 I know.  I need more pie. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Hey Mon umm, if you do get married, can I bring two guests?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 You didnt break up with that fireman?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 No, that was my way of telling you. Well, it turns out hesincredibly sensitive, he keeps a journal and he paints. He even showed me charcoaldrawings that he drew of me.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Rachel	 Wow!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, well hed prefer water colors, but y'know, he has easy accessto a lot of charcoal.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 So then, are you going to dump Jason?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, yeah, because I have to break up with someone, and Okay soJason is sensitive,  but now sos Vince  Plus, Vince has the body y'know?  So Its really just about the math.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Jason?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Yeah, come on in.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 So Phoebe, you ah, sounded kinda serious on the phone, is ah, is anythingwrong?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Nah-ha!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 You must be Ross.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Hi.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 I am Guru Saj. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Listen, I got to tell you Ive-Ive never been to a guru before,so...
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Well, relax. If it makes you feel better, Ive attended some ofthe finest medical schools in Central America. Well then, lets take a look at thisskin abnormality of yours.  Come on, have a seat.  Eeh,huh. As I suspected, its a koondis!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Whats a koondis?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 I dont know, whats a koondis with you?  Please, lie down! Ivegot a sav that oughta shrink that right up.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 I guess its worth a try.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Oh sure, we should see resultsWhoa!! Clearly not the way to go!!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 What?! What?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 We appear to have angered it.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 We?! We angered it?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Oh, I think I see the problem. And Im afraid were gonnahave to use a much stronger tool.  Love.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Oh God!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	  Ross,there is absolutely no way this is going to come off unless you start to
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Ow!! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Oops.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 What was, what was that?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Well its gone.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 What?! Hows that?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 It got caught on my watch.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Ross	 Hey! 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Lights.  Uh,romantic lights. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Ooh, nice.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 So ah, there was this thing I wanted to talk to you about.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Oh, right! I completely forgot about that.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Well ah, Ive been doing a lot of thinking, and I look at mylife
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Yeah?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 And I feel like Ive conquered the business world, and I feel likeIve conquered the intellectual world, and now I-I have the most beautiful woman inthe world.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Wow.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Theres one thing missing.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Whats that?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Its time for me to conquer the physical world.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 Okay. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Monica, I want to become  the Ultimate Fighting Champion.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 You wanna what?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 I want to become the Ultimate Fighting Champion! Its the mostintense physical competition in the world, its banned in 49 states!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 What are you talking about?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Okay, my trainer, Ho Chi, is teaching me a combination of Gee Koon Doe andBrazilian street fighting, Ive even had my own octagon training ring designed.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 And I suppose you used a ring designer for that.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Pete	 Yeah. Monica, I want you there in the front row when I win. I want youclose enough to smell the blood. What do you think?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Monica	 My parents will be so happy.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Crazy underwear, creepin up my butt.  Crazy underwear, always in a rut. Crazy under--wear  Oh No! What is he doing here? All right, just keep playing, just keepplaying. Youll get through this; youll be fine.   Okay, thank you. And, as always no one talk to meafter the show.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	  Hey. I was
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Hey!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 I was passin by and I saw that you were playing tonight, itskinda cool seeing you up there. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	  Whoa! Hey-hey! Whats going on here? Who is this guy?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 I dont know, he just started kissing me. Get him! Get him, Vince!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 What?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 What?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay, Ive-Ive been dating both of you, and itsbeen really horrible. Cause y'know its been a lot of fun, for me. Umm, but I-Ilike you both, and I, and I didnt know how to chose, so... Im sorry, Imjust, Im terrible, Im a terrible person. Im terrible.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Phoebe, Phoebe relax, its okay. I mean we never said this wasexclusive.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Yeah, and neither did we. Give yourself a break.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Really?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Yeah. I mean y'know, we havent been going out that long.Come on, we havent even slept together yet. Huh.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 You havent?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 You have?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, this is none of my business. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	  I-I cant believe this! You-youve slept with him?!
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Well, I made you a candle light dinner in the park.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Jason	 Y'know Phoebe, Im gonna make this real easy for you. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	  Well, that couldve been really awkward.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 You made him a candle light dinner in the park?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Phoebe	 Yeah, but I-I-I-I can do that for you, Im gonna do that for you.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Vince	 Uh yeah, I cant believe I ever went out with somebody who wouldactually have an open flame in the middle of a wooden area. 
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Chandler	  Everythings gonna be all right. Okay,Dick?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	  Hello, I am Guru Saj--Whoa!! Thats supposed to be a duck right? Cause otherwise, this is waaay out of myleague.
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. Hes got a, hes got a really bad cough, and ourvet, he cant do anything about it. Is there something you can do?
03	23	0323	The One With Ross's Thing	Guru Saj	 Hmm, let me see. Let me see. Do you think you could get him to eat abat?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Do you think that theres a town in Missouri or some place calledSample? And ah, as youre driving into town theres-theres like a sign,and it says Youre in Sample. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  Hey.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	All	 Hey! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Howd it go with Pete?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 Tell us!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Youre not gonna believe this. Okay, so I go over...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy Crystal	 Im sorry. Ex-excuse us. Im sorry, its a littlecrowded. Do you mind if we... 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin Williams	 Yeah, could you scooch?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Yeah, move over just a little bit. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Keep on scooching.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 So guys, listen, I go over there, and umm...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Why? Why?! Whats wrong with me?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Whats the matter?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 I have a feelin... I, my wife is sleeping with her gynaecologist.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 How do you know?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Well y'know, hes got access.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Yeah.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Y'know its that feeling you get, y'know?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Like when you go bowling and you know youre in somebody elsesshoes?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Thats the one.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 All right, so, so you went to Petes...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 What happened?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  I...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 Why is this happening to me?! I dont know, maybe its mywound.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Forget it. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 So its-its not heeled yet?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 No-no, its ooozing, oozing.  Could you pass me thecream? Is there anyOh, theres the cream.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Thomas, this is gonna be hard, but I wanted it to come from me, andnobody else.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	 What is it, Tim?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Its me, Ive been sleeping with your wife.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	  So youre the gynaecologist?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	  Hey, Im trying to have a private conversation! Is thatokay?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Robin	  Ooh,  Can I have a napkin, please? Could youplease hand me a napkin?  Wouldyou--Give me this thing  all right!! Enough! And you are no longer my friend! We are finished!  Nada!! No more! Youare a bastard for doing this!!  Get away from me!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Billy	 Thomas, come back here! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 So Monica, what were you gonna tell us?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  I have no idea.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! Orshould I say Mrs. Monica Becker?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 No-no-no oh, keep your name, dont take his name.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 He didnt ask me to marry him.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	All	 Ohh.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Well then definately dont take his name.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 He wanted to tell me hes gonna compete is some ultimate fightingcompetition thingy.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	The Guys	 Pete?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Why?! What is it?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 I dont know exactly. Its-its sorta like wrestling.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	  Oh?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Yeah, but without the costumes.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	  Oh.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 And its not fake, its totally brutal.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Yeah, its two guys in a ring, and the rules are:Theyre are no rules.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 So you can like, bite, and pull peoples hair and stuff?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Yeah, anything goes, except ah, eye gouging and fish hooking.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Whats fish hooking?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Huh, whats fish hooking...  Thanks man, that would have been really hard to describe. What is that taste?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 What? My hands are totally clean, I just gave the duck a bath.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 So thanks for the warm welcome. Its good to have you guys on myteam, and I come to play. I hope you do too. Now, lets go out there and getem! Huh? And remember, there is no I in team.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Yes, but theres two in martini, soo everybody back to myoffice.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	  You! Chuckles! Whats your name?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Oh its Bing, sir. Im sorry , I was just ah...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 No-no, I heard what you said, funny. I like funny.  This team is about hard work, but its also about having fun. Good to have youaboard Bing! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	  Thats right, Ryder. Wynona Ryder for six.  Thankyou.   Yeah, we have the reservations.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Yes!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 All right buddy, way to go! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	  Dude, what are you doing?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Thank you! Today, my boss keep slapping my butt and he was acting likeit was no big deal.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Yeesh, whatd you do about it?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Well, I didnt do anything. I didnt want to be the guy whohas a problem with his boss slapping his bottom.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 I gotta tell ya, I think its okay to be that guy.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 Yeah, maybe its like y'know, that jock thing. Y'know how footballplayers pat each other after touchdowns.  
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Y'know I dont, I dont understand guys, I mean I-I wouldnever congratulate Monica on a great stew by y'know, grabbin her boob.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Yeah, I know, for a really great stew you just y'know, stick your headin between em.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Okay, can we please go eat?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 Yeah. What are we getting?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  Anything but stew.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 All right so, Chandler, from now on, dont give your boss a chance toget you. Y'know just ah, dont turn your back to him.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 Yeah, or you can teach him a lesson. Y'know? What you could do is youcould rub something that really smells on your butt, all right? Then, when he goes tosmack ya, his hand will smell.  Now what could you rub on your butt thatwould smell bad?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	  What if Joey were president?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Umm, hey Rach, can I ask you something?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Yeah.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Okay, you can totally say no, but umm, would it be okay with you if Iset Ross up on a date?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh, ah with who?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Umm, my friend, Bonnie. She just always thought Ross was really cute,and now that you two arent together, she asked if I could set it up, but ifyoure not cool with it...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh-oh-oh, which one is Bonnie again?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 You remember her from my birthday party two years ago. Shes yeah,like, average height, medium build, bald...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh!  Thats fine.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Great! Okay, good for you! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Hoshi	 You are iron. You are steel! Let me ask you something, how come when Icall your computer support line, I have to wait an hour and a half?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 I told you, were adding new operators all the time. Could weconcentrate on my training?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Hoshi	 Its just hard when I know I have e-mail I cant get! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  Hi!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Monica!  Hi honey.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Hoshi	 All right, on the table. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Hey, umm, so listen umm, my friends were telling me a little about thisah, ultimate fighting thing and it, well it sounds really dangerous. I-I dont wantyou to get hurt, cause I kinda like you.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Oh, believe me, I dont want to get hurt either. Im being smartabout this. See these guys? Theyre the best trainers in the world, and Hoshi hereused to be a paid assassin.  A house painter! He used to bea house painter.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Promise me youll be careful.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 I promise.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Hey, are we still on for tonight?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Yeah.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Okay, good, cause umm, well maybe we could have a little workoutof our own...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Hoshi	 No! No boom-boom before big fight!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 How bout just a boom?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	  Well that was depressing, I think I just bought a softpretzel from one of the kids from Fame. Ready to go to the movies?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Um-hmm. Oh wait! This is Bonnie. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Bonnie	 Hi!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 This is Bonnie?  This is Bonnie?  YoureBonnie?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Bonnie	 I can show you an ID if you want?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh no, Im sorry, you look a lot different from the last time I-Isaw you.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Bonnie	 Oh yeah, well I just started wearing bras again.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh, that must be it.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	  Well I hope you have fun tonight.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Bonnie	 Thanks! You too.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	  You said she was bald.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Yeah, she was bald, shes not now.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 How could you not tell me that she has hair?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 I dont know, I hardly ever say that about people.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	  Ohh, well, this is just perfect!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Well Im sorry, I thought you said it was okay.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Yeah, I said what was okay when I thought she was some weird bald chick.I mean, y'know, that girl has hair got all over head!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Well, maybe it wont work out. Maybe Ross wont like herpersonality.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Why, does she have a bad personality?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Oh no, Bonnies the best!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Bing!  Readyour Computech proposal, a real homerun.  Ooh. Barely got ya that time, get over here. Come on.  Wham!  Good one. That was a good one.  Keep at it team. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	  What is with him?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phil	 With him? Youre is favourite, youre his guy!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Stevens	 We never get smacked.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Well, thats not true, he-he smacked you once.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phil	 Not on purpose, he ricocheted of you and got me.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Stevens	 Im telling you, I need some smacks. I got a kid startingDartmouth in the fall.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	  Dartmouth? Who went to Dartmouth? Dartmouthsucks. Did you go to Dartmouth Bing?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 No sir.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 There you go. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	  Hey!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 God Ross, what is that?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Yeah, its the Ultimate Fighting Combo. Yeah, I saved thirty cents,plus I get to keep the cup. Yay!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Announcer	 From New York City, New York! Appearing in his Ultimate FightingChampionship debut! Hes known for his confrontational business style. Ladies andGentlemen, introducing Pete Beck-errrr!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 I love you, Pete!!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Announcer	 And his opponent, from Hunnington Beach, California! Hes a 300pound street fighter, Tank Abbottttttt!!!! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  Pete! Pete!! That guys pretty huge!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Dont worry, Hoshi taught me how to use an opponents strengthand weight against him.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Well, then that guy is in serious, serious trouble.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 All right! You go get him! Lets go!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Referee	 Here we go gentlemen, here we go!  Are you ready?   Are you ready? Lets get it on!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Uh-oh.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Hey!  Its me. Mon-i-ca! Can I just tellyou how proud I am of you.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 It would be nice after hearing 20,000 people chant You suck!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 I mean I-I thought you were nuts at first, but you-you did it. And nowyou can just look back at this thing with no regrets.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 What, look back?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Well, youre not gonna get going are you?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Well let me ask you a question. Am I the Ultimate Fighting Champion?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Well, no. But...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Well Im not gonna stop until Im the Ultimate FightingChampion.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 That guy stood on your neck until you passed out!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Let me tell you a story. When I set out to create Moss 865, do you thinkit just happened overnight? No. There was Moss 1, that burnt down my Dads garage,there was Moss 2 that would only schedule appointments in January, and 862 others that Ilearned from, just like I learned from this fight, never to let a guy stand on my neck.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 You didnt know that already?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Look, Im gonna get better. Okay? I promise you.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Okay, just get a lot better.  Fast.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Oh, one other thing. Hoshi thinks that you being ringside may haveaffected my concentration.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Yeah. That-that was the problem.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	  Hey.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Hey! How long until Petes fight?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Oh, about five minutes. Right now theyre interviewing hisopponent. Apparently he trains by going to Iran and pulling the arms off thieves.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Hot dog?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Four, please.  Im really nervous.  Thank you. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 So Ross, how umm, how did it go with Bonnie?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 What? Oh! I gotta tell you, I-I wasnt expecting to like her at all,I mean I actually wasnt expecting to like anyone right now, but shes reallyterrific.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Ohh, thats too bad!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 No, I-Im saying I liked her.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Yeah, y'know what, there are other fish in the sea.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Pheebs, I think shes great. Okay? Were going out again.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Okay, I hear you! Are you capable of talking about any thing else?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	  Hey! Which ones my turkey burger?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Ahh, the one next to my foot. Sorry.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	  Hey, the fights starting!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Okay, well be right in.  So ah, did your boss try toslap you again today?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Nine times! Okay, I had to put on lotion! But, its gonna beokay, because as of tomorrow Im conducting an experiment, and if all goes asplanned, my butt will be smack free.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	  Fights over!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Excuse me, Doug?  Hey there sports fan!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	  Bing! You got those numbers for me?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 No, I ah, I didnt do them.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Oh, you forgot?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 No, no I just ah, didnt do them. Instead, I ah, hung out with acouple of friends and had a couple of beers so I certainly dont deserve any praise,verbal or otherwise.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Well, I got tanked myself last night. Pretty dicey drive home, TapanziBridge never looked smaller.  Thats okay, youre still my number oneguy!  Bing!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Doug!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Hmm.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Im a little bit uncomfortable with the that way you expressyourself.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Oh, is it the swearing? I mean is it the constant swearing? Because Igotta tell ya, if it is, you can just... kiss my ass!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 No, no. It-its not about the swearing, its more about ah,the way, that you ah, occasionally, concentrate, your enthusiasm on my buttock.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Oh?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Oh, and dont get me wrong, I appreciate the sentiment. Itsjust that I, I have a rather, sensitive posterior, and ah, besides, its making allthe other guys jealous.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Well, say no more. Y'know it takes guts to bring this up. Bing!Youre okay.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Okay. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Ha! Ahhhhhhh!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Ahhhhh! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Okay. Would you rather live in the shirt pocket of a sweaty giant, orinside his shower drain?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	  Oh my God! Phoebe look,its Ross and that girl.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 No! No! Look at that!  Its a lineof ants! Theyre working as a team!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Phoebe! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	  Right, oh yeah. Wow, oh, it looks like Ross isbreaking up with her. Uff, I hope he lets her down easy. Lets go.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Come on Phoebe, look at that! They are not breaking up, look at them.Okay thats, you know what that is? That is a, that is a second date, thatswhat that is! Look at that, she just put her hand on his thigh...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Oh no! That really is nothing, she is very sexually aggressive.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Ohh!  Phoebe, this is all your fault! Nowhe loves her, hes gonna marry her, and this is all your fault.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 You said it was okay!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 You said she was bald!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 What?! What-what-what-what-what?!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Phoebe, we cant, we just cant just let it happen! Okay, wehave to do something! We have to break them up! Okay? Just go in there and like, shave herhead! You owe me one bald girl!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Okay, first of all, breathe. Second of all, I dont get it.Arent you the one that decided that you didnt want to be with Ross?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	  Yes.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Well isnt he your friend? Dont you want him to be happy?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Yes.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 So?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 I just y'know, I didnt expect him to be this happy so soon. Ufff.Ooo-ooh!  
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	  Oh no.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 What?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Oh, we killed them all.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Its okay, its not as bad as it looks, its a precaution.Ah, Im not supposed to move my spine.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Please tell me youre stopping now.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Im fine! Id fight tonight, if theyd let me.  See this circle Im marking off here? This is my zoneof terror.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 You are insane! You-you gotta give this up!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 I cant until Im the ultimate fighter. I will do it. Imtelling you, the day will come when children will argue over who will win a fight, me orSuperman. Now, Im not saying I could beat Superman, but y'know, kids are stupid.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Sit down. All right? Please, just listen to me. You are terrible atthis! Okay? You are the worst ultimate fighter ever! Ever!! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Y'know I have a torn rotator cuff, a hairline fracture in my rightforearm, and a severely bruised Adams Apple, but that really hurt.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Well then, y'know what? I care about you to much to watch you hurtyourself like this. So if you have to do this, then youre gonna have to do itwithout me.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Well if youre asking me to quit, then youre asking me to besomeone Im not. Ive got to do this.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Then Ive gotta go. Bye. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Mon-Monica?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Yes?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Pete	 Could you leave a note? Cause Im on a lot of pain killers now,and I dont know if Ill remember this tomorrow. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 So, in conclusion, the lines all go up , so Imhappy. Great job team! Tomorrow at 8:30.  Phil! Nice job.  Stevens! Way to go!  Joel-burg, you maniac! I loveya!   Bing! Good job, couldnt have doneit without ya. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Thank you, sir.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Stevens	  Oh, excuse me. I forgot my briefcase y'know, byaccident.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Of course, you did. Forgot something else too ya bastard!   Well, what about you? Youre not feeling left out or anythingare ya?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 No. No, not at all, thats-thats ridiculous.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Everybody else got one, and you want one too. Dont you?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Ye-ye-yeah, yes I do!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Doug	 Now get on out of here, you! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Tv Announcer	 Pete Becker is circling the ring now. It looks like, hesjust trying to feel him out. Oh, Bruiser is just...
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Chandler	 Run! Run you crazy, rich freak!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Rachel	 Oh, I cant watch this. 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 Check it out, hes winning!  Petes winning!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Monica	 Really?!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Joey	 No-o-o!!
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Tv Announcer	 Uh-oh, Bruiser has Becker on the canvas and is going for hisfavourite area.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	All	 Oh! Oh! 
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Phoebe	 Wait, if thats his favourite area, why is he being so mean to it?
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	Ross	 Well, this is ironic. Of your last two boyfriends, Richard didntwant to have kids, and from the looks of it, now Pete cant.
03	24	0324	The One With The Ultimate Fighting Champion	All	 Ohh!! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	  So ah, your first sexual experience was with a woman?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 All right, I was 15, it was my best friend, Ruth, and we got drunk onthat hard cider, and then suddenly, I dont know, we were, we were making out.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Tell it again.  Seriously.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything elsebut sex?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Yeah, sure. Well y'know, earlier she was talking about geography.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Joey, she was listing the countries shes done it in.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Well, I think we all learned something.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Hey, you guys! Look what I found! Look at this! Thats my Moms writing! Look.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	  Me and Frank and Phoebe, Graduation1965.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Y'know what that means?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 That youre actually 50?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 No-no, thats not, thats not me Phoebe, thatsher pal Phoebe. According to her high school yearbook, they were like B.F.F.  Best Friends Forever.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Oh!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 That is so cool.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 I know! So this woman probably could like have all kinds of storiesabout my parents, and she might even know like where my Dad is. So I looked her up, andshe lives out by the beach. So maybe this weekend we could go to the beach?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Yeah! Yeah, we can!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	  Shoot! I cant go, I have to work!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Thats too bad.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  Ohh, big, fat bummerrr.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 So great! Okay! Tomorrow were gonna drive out to Montauk.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Hey, Bonnie had sex there!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	  Would you look at them. AmI ever gonna find a boyfriend again? I gonna die an old maid.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Youre not gonna die an old maid, maybe an old spinster cook.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	  Thanks!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Hey now besides, if worst comes to worst, Ill be your boyfriend.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Yeah right.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Why is that so funny?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 You made a joke right? So I laughed.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Ha-ha-ha. A little to hard. What am I not ah, boyfriend material?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Well, no. Youre Chandler. Y'know, Chandler! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Okay, so weve established my name, and hit me. But theoreticallyy'know, I mean say we werent friends, say its a blind date. I show up at yourdoor, and Im like  Hey, nice to meet, ya. Hey, oh-hey.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Well Id probably be scared of a guy using a fake voice.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	  Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Oh, hey! Oh good, you brought food!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 No, its just my luggage.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler, Monica, Joey	 Hey!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Woo-hoo! All right! Yeah!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh, I am having the best karma this week. First, I find this woman whoknew my parents, and then my client with the fuzzy back gives me his beach house.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Yeah? What about ah, that bike messenger you hit?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh, I wasnt talking about his karma.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  Hey! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Hey-hey, check out the hat!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 What a minute, I know that hat! I was taken aboard that hat! They didexperiments on me! I cant have children!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Seriously, where did you get the hat?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Ross gave it to me.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Yeah, I think she looks good.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Ohh, thank you.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Buy it for ya, or win it for ya?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you thathats are back.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 And this time, theyve ganged up to form one giant, super hat.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Go, go, go!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh yeah, now everybody wants to be under this hat!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oy!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Whats with all this sand? 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, Bob said there might be flood damage.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Yeah, either that, or he has a really big cat.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Well, yes, its kindve an unusual house. It has umm, threebeautiful bedrooms and ah, no baths. But y'know, the ocean is right there.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Knock, knock, knock.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	  Ah, oh, hang on a second.  Come in, come in. All right, so think about it, and call me back. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Are you ah, Phoebe Abott?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Ahh, yes.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Hi Phoebe Abott, Im your best friends daughter!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Youre Erwins daughter?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 No, I-I mean your-your old best friend, here. Lily, from high school. Remember?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Oh gosh, Lily, yes. Of course I remember Lily. I... Then you must be?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Phoebe.  Phoebe. Phoebe, yeah. Shenamed me after you I guess.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Uh-huh. Wow! Well, look! Theres Frank. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Yes!! Yes! Yes! Yes!! Thats my Dad, thats Frank! Yeah!Im sorry Im getting all flingy.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Take it easy--if you want, theres cookies on the counter, or,or--sangria!  I can make sangria!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 No-no, sorry. Cookies are good, thanks. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Oh.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Well, so, umm, anyway umm, Ive been,Ive been looking for my Father, and umm, have you heard from him, or seen him?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Oh no, I-Im sorry, I guess we lost track of everybody afterhigh school.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Oh, okay. Well, so tell me everything about my parents.Everything.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Ohh, well. Y'know we were always together, in fact the had a nicknamefor the three of us.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh, what? What was it?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 The three losers. Oh, poor Lily.  Ohh, y'know I-I heard about what happened,that must have been just terrible for you, losing your mother that way.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Yeah, no, it was great.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	  Hey, y'know what a really good rainy day game is?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 What?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 I mean naked game. Strip poker, we should totally play strip poker.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 No, no!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 What are you crazy?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Come on! When you go away, you-you have to play, its like a law!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  Allll done!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Aww, thank you.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Okay, whos next?! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 No-o-o!  No way! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Come on, please?! Im boredddd! You let me do it once before.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Yeah well, if ah, if thats the rule this weekend... No!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Yes! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Get away!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Just once! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Stay away!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Take it like a man, Ross!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	  No!  No!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, come on!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Big bullies!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Ow! Ow! Oh, no-no-no!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	  Oh, hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh, so, how are we doing?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Bored and bored!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Hey, you know what naked card game is never boring?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Noo!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	  So whats Phoebe like?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Im kind, caring, and sweet. Whats Monica like?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Ah no, the other Phoebe, the one you went to go see.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Ohh, I think she knows where my Dad is.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 What?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Really?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Oh well, where is he?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 She was acting, she was pretending like she hasnt heard from himon years, but I found this picture on her fridge, and look ! Isnt thiswhat he would look like now?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	  Totally familiar. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, yeah.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	The Guys	 Yeah!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Well, why would she lie to you?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 I dont know, but were having dinner tomorrow night, so Ifigured, shes gonna tell me then. Y'know maybe she just wanted to give him time to,buy me presents, I dont know! So, youre all bored?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Ohh!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Yes!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 All right, Im gonna close my eyes and point to someone, and you,whoever I point has to come up with something fun for us to do, and we have to doit. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Okay, all right. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Okay.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Fan out! Fan out!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Okay.  Ooh, y'know we could just do this. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Okay, umm, we all have to play strip poker.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	  OH YES!!!!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Strip Happy Days Game?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Yeah, well, I couldnt find any cards, so it was either this or StripBag Of Old Knitting Stuff.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okay,  Fonzy gives you two thumbs up, collect two coolpoints. Yeah.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Monica, if you get five cool points, you get to make somebody take offone item of clothing. It hasnt happened yet, but were all very excited.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okay, come on!  Daddy needs a new pair ofelectromagnetic microscopes for the Prehistoric Forensics Department!   Okay.  TakePinky Tuscadero up to Inspiration Point, collect three cool points!! Yeah! Which gives mefive, and lets see who is gonna lose their clothes. Ummmm, I think I pick our strippoker sponsor Mr. Joey Tribianni.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	The Girls	 Woo-hooooo!!!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 All right, relax. Its just a shoe.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Wooooo!!!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  Okay, your band is playing at Arnolds, collectthree cool points. Which means, I have five, and that means I get Joeys boxers!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Fine. Gang up on me! I got you all right where I want you.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Come on, take em off!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Actually, y'know its kinda cold, so how about I keep my boxers on,and give you all a peek at the good stuff?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  All right, Im gonna make more margaritas! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Whoa, hey! What are doing? Trying to get me drunk?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Im just making margaritas.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okay.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 I think Ill help her out.   What is going on here?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 What?! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 You painting his toenails?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, come on!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Chasing him all around the room?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Monica, please?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Hes totally flirting with you too.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  He is, isnt he? I dont know, I dont know, Imean maybe its just being here at the beach together or, I dont know. Butits like something... 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Hey!  Hi Bonnie!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Hi! My boss let me off early, so I took the train. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Oh.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 What are you guys doing?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Were playing Strip Happy Days Game!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Cool! Ill catch up! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 So, you still dont think Im boyfriend material?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Huh?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 I saw you checking me out during the game last night.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 You didnt even take off your pants.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Yeah, well, lucky for you.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 What?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 I dont know.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	  Well! Is everybody else having just the best time?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Shhh! Shhhh! Joeys asleep.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 After he passed out, we put the sand around him to keep him warm.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Well I assume the ah, happy couple isnt up yet. Did you guys hearthem last night?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, I dont know what they were doing, but at one point seaturtles actually came up to the house.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Good morning.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Hey.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Hey! How did everybody sleep?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, great.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Like a log.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross, Bonnie	 Us too.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Im going for a walk.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	  Good morning. Nice breasts by the way.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Hey, what happened to you?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, ah nothin. I just felt like hangin out here and reading.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Oh, the water was sooo great! We jumped off this pier and my suit cameoff.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Ohhhh, sorry I missed that.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Yeah, Joey and Chandler sure are funny. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Ohh-ha-ha!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 I think I brought back half of the beach in my hair. It was so mucheasier when I used to shave my head.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Y'know, I gotta tell ya, I just loved your look when you werebald.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Really?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Ohh!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Because I think about shaving it all off again sometime.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Really?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Yeah!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 I mean you definitely should do that.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Y'know what, I should do it.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Yeah!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Yeah, thank you Rachel, you are soo cool.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Awww, stop. Come on. Now go shave that head!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 All right.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Whats the matter, Pheebs?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 She cancelled! My namesake cancelled on me!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 What?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Yeah, she clamed she had to go out of town suddenly. Shes avoidingme, she doesnt want to tell me where my Father is. She knows, and she wonttell me.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Aww Pheebs, that sucks!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, dont Aww Pheebs, that sucks! me yet. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Where ya going?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Well, shes out of town so, theres gotta be something in herhouse that tells me where my Father is.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Uh, Pheebs, some people call that breaking and entering.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Well, are any of those people here?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Oh, no!! No, no!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Okay, look I-I-I do something nice, okay? Ill-Ill fill herice trays.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Hey, everybody!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	All	 Wow!! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Wh-haa-haa! Look what cha did! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 You wanna touch it?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Nooo, but it, but its great.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Come on, touch it!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okay.  You can feel all the bones in your skull.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Hi.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Hi!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 I was having a little chat with ah, Bonnie, and ah, guess what, she-shehappened to bring up y'know, who was behind the um, whole head shaving idea, and now, whowas it? Oh, thats right, thats right, it was you!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 That was her idea, I just gave her a nudge.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 She said you gave her the razor!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	  Hey guys.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 So, anyone up for a midnight dip in the ocean?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Ahh, no, Im good.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Okay, Ill see you in a bit.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okay, have fun! Wooo!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Come on see, she doesnt look that bad.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 You can see the moonlight bouncing off her head! What the hell were youthinking?!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 I dont know.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 You dont know?! Rach, you balded my girlfriend!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 All right! Ross, do you think its easy for me to see you withsomebody else?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 You still love me?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Noo.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 You still love me.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Oh, y-yeah, so, you-you love me!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Noo, nnnnn. What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, getback together?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know. Ross, I still cant forgive youfor what you did, I cant, I just, but sometimes when Im with you I just, Ifeel so...
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 What?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 I just, I feel, I-I just...
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 What?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 I feel...
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	  Noo!! I dont care! Im not, Im not gonnaplaying one-on-one strip poker with you for practice! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 But I made cards!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Rachel	 Well! Good night.  Im going upstairs.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey, Chandler	 Gnight.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	  Wanna play strip poker for practice?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Ow! My ass. Okay. Okay.  Oh, shhh!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 No! No!! Its me! Its me! I-I didnt want to make anynoise!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Then don't break in!!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Im sorry.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 What are you doing here?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 I-I, came to fill your ice cube trays.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 What?!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Umm, okay, okay, look. I took this picture from your fridge. Okay,because I know that this is my Father. Yeah, this is Frank Buffay and you are standingright there next to him. Now, look I deserve to know where I came from. All right? So ifyou can help me find my Father then you should! Otherwise, youre just mean! So, just tell me the truth!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 All right, the man in the picture is Chuck Magioni. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 My Father is Chuck Magioni?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 No, no, thats just Chuck Magioni, I-I sold him a house lastyear! And Im very sorry, but I dont know where your Father is, and thatsthe truth.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Oh.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 But umm, youre right. I think that a person should know wherethey come from. Wh-which is why I ah,  ahh,  okay. Im your mother.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe	 Heh?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Phoebe Sr	 Y'know I wanted to tell you yesterday, but I just, I kinda felt allfloopy, and... 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Im telling ya, you guys are totally getting back together!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Thats not true! Her, she doesnt even know what she wants!Rachels still mad about the whole thing.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Okay, then you gotta back away, all right? You dont need thatkindve hurt. Take it from a guy whos never had a long term relationship......
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 I know, but ahhhhhh!! I really wanna go up there and finish that kiss!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	  Hey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Ahhhh! 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 You guys, the waters great. You should really go in.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Oh, ahh, no thanks, I just had an M&M.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	 Okay, well gnight.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Good night.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Bonnie	  Dont be too long.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Okey-dokey!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 There is not one hair on that head.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Hey, itll grow back, right? And she-shes really fun, andshes cool, and-and Im finally moving on. Y'know? I mean getting over Rachelwas so , y'know? Y'know, and Im finally feelingsane again. And now if I go up there, and-and I kiss her, and, Gooood I wanna kiss her,and-and-and it doesnt work out, right? Do I really wanna put myself through thatagain?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 So let me get this straight. If you go with Bonnie tonight, youredoing the smart, healthy thing and moving on.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	 Yeah.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Joey	 Right, and you go with Rachel, Bonnies free tonight?
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Ross	  Hi. 
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	  Hi there.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Monica	 Thats that weird voice again.
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Okay! Okay! Let me try it again, youre gonna wanna date thisnext guy, I swear!
03	25	0325	The One At The Beach	Chandler	 Hi! Im Dorf! Youre date for the evening.  Oh come on! Dorf on dating, thats good stuff!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Okay, so we went to the beach, because Phoebe found out about this lady who knew her momand dad, and I dont really know what happened with that.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	  Im your mother.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Ehh?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  Oh, and then Monica joked that she wouldnt go out witha guy like Chandler...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	   Hi there. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  ...and he couldnt let it go, and... I dont reallyknow what happened with that either. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  Oh-oh! And then Rosss new girlfriend, Bonnie, shows upand Rachel convinced her to save her head. And then Ross and Rachel kiss, and now Ross hasto choose between Rachel and the bald girl and I dont know what happened thereeither... 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Y'know what, hold on, let me go get Chandler. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  Hi!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel, Bonnie	 Hi!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Bonnie	 Rachel was just helping me out. My head got all sunburned.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Awww.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Bonnie	  Thanks a million.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Oh, youre welcome a million.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Bonnie	   Okay, Ill see you in our room.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	  Oh my God.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 I know.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  Okay, I gotta go.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Whoa! What?! Why?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Well, I-I gotta go break up with Bonnie.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Here?! Now?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Well, yeah. I cant-I cant stay here all night, and if I go inthere shes-shes gonna wanna... do stuff.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Well, cant you tell her that you are not in the mood?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 No, she likes that. Yeah. Faking sleep doesnt work either, Icant tell you how many mornings I woke up with her...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	  Whoa-ho.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Whoa-oh, okay! Yeah, why am I telling you that?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 I dont know.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Yeah, yeah.  It wasnt every morning.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Oh, making it worse!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Okay.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 So I guess youd like to know how it all happened. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I-I mean I, well I think I can figure it out. I guess y'know I was born,and everyone started lying their asses off!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Noo! No! It wasnt like that I... Remember how I told you howLily, Frank, and I we were, we were close. Well, we were, we were very close.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 How close?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Well, the-the three of us we were, kind of umm, a couple.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I dont even know how that would work!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Well, we were...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  Im not asking!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Well, any how, some how I got pregnant, and, and I was scared. I wasstupid and sellfish, and I was 18 years old. I mean, you remember what its like tobe eighteen years old?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Yeah. Lets see, my had Mom killed herself, and my Dad had run off,and I was living in a Gremlin with a guy named Cindy who talked to his hand.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Well, Im so sorry. I thought I was leaving you with the bestparents in the world, I didnt even hear about your Mom and Dad til a couple of yearsago, and by then you were already grown up. I dont know, youre here, and Iwould, I would really, I would like to get to know you.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, everybody does! Im a really cool person. And y'knowyou had 29 years to find that out, but you didnt even try! Y'know what, you walkedout on me, and Im just, Im gonna do the same thing to you.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Wait!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I dont ever want to see you again! 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  Umm, wheres mypurse?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	  Shoot! Were out of soda.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	  Oh, Ill go out and get you some.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Really?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Nope! Because Im not your boyfriend.  Hey Pheebs, how did it go?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Well, umm, my Moms friend, Phoebe, is actually my birth Mom.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 I found a dried up seashores.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Sweety, what are you talking about?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Oh, my new Mom, who-whos a big, fat abandoner! 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Whoa, wait, Pheebs, wait a second! Dont you wanna stay here and talkabout it?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 No. Im just, I wanna, I need to be alone.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  Monica!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Oh.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Its over.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Oh, was it awful?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Well, it was loong. I didnt even realise how late it was, until Inoticed the 5 oclock shadow on her head.  Anyway, she didnt want to stay. I called a cab; she just left.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 I wrote you a letter.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Ohh! Thank you! I like mail. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	  Its just some things Ive beenthinking about. Some things about us, and before we can even think about the two of usgetting back together, I just need to know how you feel about this stuff.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Okay.  Wow, its-its 5:30 in the morning.  So,Id better get cracking on this baby.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Well, Ill be waiting for you, just come up when youre done.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Okay, Ill be up in,  18 pages. Front and back.Very exciting.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Oh.  Oh-oh. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	  Hey!  What happened to you? Whydidnt you come up?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Done!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 You just finished?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Well, I wanted to be thorough. I mean this-this is clearly very, veryimportant to you, to us! And so I wanted to read every word carefully, twice!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 So umm, does it?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Im sorry.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Does it?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Does it? Does it? Yeah, I wanted to give that whole Does it?part just another glance.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 What are you talking about, Ross, you just said that you read it twice!Look, y'know what, either it does or it doesnt, and if you have to even thinkabout it...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  No, Rach, no. I dont, I dont, I dont haveto think about it, in fact, Ive decided, Ive decided that, that it.......does.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Are you sure?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Oh, sure! Im sure.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 I know. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man onEarth. Would you go out with me?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Ennnh.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Ive got canned goods.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  Hey, youguys! Take a look at this!  Checkthis baby out, dug me a hole!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Excellent hole, Joe.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Oh no! No!! My hole!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	  Ow!! Ow!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  What?! What?!! What is it?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Jellyfish sting! Oh, it hurts! It hurts!! It hurts!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Well, can we help?! You want us to take you back to the house?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Its like two miles!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Yeah, and Im a little tired from digging the hole.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Oh damn the jellyfish. Damn all the jellyfish!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Weve got to do something!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Well, theres really only one thing you can do.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 What?! What is it?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Youre gonna have to pee on it.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 What?!! Gross!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Dont blame me, I saw it on The Discovery Channel.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Y'know what, hes right. Theres something like uh, ammoniain that, that like kills the pain.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Well forget it! It doesnt hurt that  baaad!!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 If you want some privacy you can use my hole.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Well, Im ready to get the hell out of here!  Oh. Are you? Are you?!!  Ohh!Thats so great!! Ooh, not for Bonnie.  But for you, yay!Ohh.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Hey!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 How was the beach?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Nothing, I dont know.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 What happened?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Nothing. Im gonna take a shower.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Me too!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Me too.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Okay, Im gonna put this  in the car.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Ooh, I have to go pack.  It really does?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 It does. It really and truly does.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	   It so does not!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 She wants me to take responsibility for everything that went wrongin our relationship. I mean she goes on for five pages about, about how I was unfaithfulto her!  WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Oh my God! If you say that one more time, Im gonna breakup with you!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Fine! Fine! But this break-up was not all my fault, and she, she sayshere,  If you accept full responsibility...  Full responsibility! ...I can begin to trust you again. Does thatseem like something you can do.  Does it?!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 No?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Look, Ross, you have what you want, youre back with Rachel. Ifyou bring this up now youre gonna wreck the best thing that even happened to you.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  Yeah, I know. I mean, no, youre right. Yeah I guessIll let it go. But you-you understand how-how hard it is to forget about this.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Sure, its hard to forget! But that doesnt mean you have totalk about it! A lot of things happened on that trip that we should never, ever talk about.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 What the hell happened on that beach?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Its between us and the sea, Ross!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  Hi, Ursula.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 Hey!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Okay, well umm, I know that we havent talked in a long time, butumm okay, our Mom is not our birth Mom. This-this other lady is our birth Mom.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 Right, okay, the one that lives in Montuak, umm-hmm.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  You know her?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 No, I umm, I read about her in Moms suicide note.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 There-there was a suicide note?!  Well, doyou still have it?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	  Hang on. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I cant believe you didnt tell me there was a suicide note!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 Yeah. So how have you been doing?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I, umm, shut up!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  Good-bye Phoebe and Ursula. Ill missyou. P.S. Your Mom lives in Montauk. You just wrote this!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 Well, its pretty much the gist. Well, except for the poem. Youread the poem, right?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Noooo!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ursula	 All right, hang on! 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Pass the cheese, please.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 My God, you cant even look at me! Can you?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Nope.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	  Hey! Phoebe! We can talk to Phoebe!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 No. Im-Im to depressed to talk.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Ill give you a thousand dollars to talk to us.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  Hey, you guys! What do you, what do you thinkabout making that beach trip an annual thing?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler, Monica, Joey	 NO!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 All right, thats it, you guys! What happened out there?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 What? We took a walk, nothing happened. I can back with nothing all overme.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross, Rachel	 Come on!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 What happened? Joey?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 All right.  
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	  No! Joey, we swore wed never tell!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	  Theyll never understand!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Well, we have to say something! We have to get it out! Its eating mealive!! Monica got stung by a jellyfish.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	  All right!! All right.  I got stung. Stung bad. I couldnt stand. I-I couldnt walk.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	  We were two miles from the house. Scared and alone.We didnt think we could make it. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 I was in too much pain.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 And I was tired from digging the huge hole!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 And then Joey remembered something.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah! Aboutjellyfish and how if you...  Ewwww!! You peedon yourself?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe, Rachel	 Ewwww!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thought Iwas gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend that way.So... 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe, Ross, Rachel	  Ewwww!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	 Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she needed help!And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you! Only, uhh, I couldnt. I got thestage fright. I wanted to help, but there was too much pressure. So-so I uh, I turned toChandler.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	  Joey kept screaming at me, Do itnow! Do it!! Do it! Do it now!! Sometimes late at night I can still here thescreaming.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Joey	  Thats cause sometimes I just do it through my wall tofreak you out.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	  ...fuchsia and mauvvve. Those are the 66 colours of mybedroommmm.  Thank you, thank you. Ohh, and I invite you to count thecolours in your bedroom.  Except for you.You go away.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Ill go in a second, I-I just wanted to tell you that therehasnt been a day where I didnt regret giving you up.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Okay, bye.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 No, Im not done. I-I-I just want you to know that I, thereason I didnt look you up was, well I was afraid that youd react, just welllike, the way, the way youre reacting right now, and cant we just, y'know,start from here?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 No.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Sorry. But just one last thing. Y'know you came looking for family.Im family, Im it. Now, now Im done. 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 But, its not like were losing anything. Y'know?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Yeah, I guess youre right.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Its not like we-we know each other or anything. Or that have anythingin common.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Well, I dont know. I mean its not like we donthave anything in common. I mean I like uh, pizza.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 I-I like pizza!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 You do?! Wait, I like umm, the Beetles.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Oh my God, so do I!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 I knew it, wow!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Wait-wait-wait, wait! Puppies. Cute or ugly?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Ohh, so cute.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, well! But umm, still Im-Im mad at you.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 I know. Im mad at me too.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 Well umm, do you wanna get something to eat? Im kinda hungry.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe Sr.	 Hey! Me too!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Phoebe	 All right, stop it. Now youre just doing it to freak me out.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Oh-hooo, I missed you.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 I missed you too.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Ooh, I was soo nervous about that letter. But the way you owned up toeverything, it just showed me how much youve grown. Y'know?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  I suppose.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 You have! Ross, you should give yourself credit. I mean my Mom neverthought this would work out. It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  Umm-hmm.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Ooh, I just wish we hadnt lost those four months, but if time waswhat you needed just to gain a little perspective...
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	   Coffee house?
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 You bet.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 And for the record, it took two people to break up thisrelationship!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Yeah! You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you tookfull responsibility for!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! Ididnt finish the whole letter!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 What?!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 I fell asleep!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 You fell asleep?!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front andback!!  Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are,Y-O-U-R means your!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting backtogether again! We are so over!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	  FINE BY ME!! 
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 Oh, oh, and hey-hey-hey, those little spelling tips will come in handywhen youre at home on Saturday nights playing Scrabble with Monica!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Hey!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	  Sorry!!  I just feel bad about all that sleepyoure gonna miss wishing you were with me!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Ross	 Oh, no-no-no dont you worry about me falling asleep. I still haveyour letter!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Rachel	 And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnthappen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 I KNEW IT!!!!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	  Gin.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 We were playing Gin? Y'know if we were a couple, we could play thisgame naked.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Will you stop!
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Chandler	 Okay. All right.
04	01	0401	The One With The Jellyfish	Monica	 Okay, all right, I think youre great, I think youre sweet,and youre smart, and I love you. But you will always be the guy who peed on me.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Wow! That ripped! That ripped real nice!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 How many times do I have to tell you! Ya, turn and sliiiide! Y'know, turnand slide.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 You dont turn and slide, you throw it out! Im tired ofhaving to get a tetanus shot every time I get dressed!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Look, were not throwing it out! I built this thing with my ownhands!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 All right, how about we, how bout we sell it.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 All right. But, youre gonna have to tell them. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	  Do you mind if we stick you in another cabinet?  They seem all right with it!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	  Hey Monica, its Chip.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Yesss!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Whos Chip?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Shhh!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	  Good runnin into you at the bank today, so ah,heres my number, 555-9323. Give me a call. Later.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Chip, is Chip Matthews.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 The guy who took Rachel to the prom? Why is he calling you?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Cause I ran into him at the bank, he is still soo cute.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Monica, youre so lucky! Hes like the most popular guy inschool!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 I know!!   Chip? Hi! Its Monica. Kay.  Kay.  Okay.  Okay, good-bye.  Oh myGod, we just had the best conversation!! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  I was just leaving.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Good! Cause Ive got a product report to read, its likeeight pages, I hope I dont fall asleep.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Why? Did you write it?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  Wow! Look at that, Chip Matthews called.I wonder what he wants?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Well ah, actually...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with anotherguy.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Well, umm, why dont you give him a call?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Okay.  Are you sure you wanna hear this?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Oh, Im sure.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  Chip! Hi, its Rachel.  Rachel Green. Yeah,umm, you left me a message.  Yes you did, my roommate wrote it down. Monica Geller.  Ohh.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Oh, thats right! He called to ask outMonica! That-thats gotta be embarrassing! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	  ...DUMB, DRUNKEN, BITCH!!!  Thank you, thanks.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Hey, heres a question; where did you guysget the finest oak East of the Mississippi?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Uh-huh, first you tell us where you got the prettiest lace in all theland.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Im reading your ad.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Looks good, uh?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Yeah.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	  Stunning entertainment center. Fine,  fineItalian craftsmanship. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Oh my God, you guys are selling the entertainment center?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Why? I love that thing.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 You want it?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe, Rachel	 Oh no.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Ahh, Gepeto, $5,000 dollars? Are you insane?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Hey, the ad alone cost 300 bucks!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 All right look, Im changing it to 50 bucks, or your best offer.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 What kind of profit is that?! And you call yourself an accountant.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	  Nooo.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Oh. What do you do?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 I cant believe you dont know what I do for a living!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Yeah, I actually dont know...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Good, so do I
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Something to do with numbers?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Oh my God! No! Shoo! Kitty! No! No-no-no! Shoo! Come on, you!  Come on. Crazy.  Oh my God.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 What?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Nothing. Nothing.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 What? Whats wrong?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 I just, I just have this really strong feeling that this cat is myMother.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 You mean the mom you met in Montauk. She was a cat?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 No, no-no, she was a human lady. This is the spirit of my MomLily, the one who killed herself.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Are you sure shes in the cat, or have you been taking yourgrandmas glycoma medicine again?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 No Dr. Skeptismo! Im sure. First of all, okay, theres thefeeling.  Okay, and for another, how about the fact that she went into myguitar case which is lined with orange felt.  MyMothers favourite fish is Orange Roughy...  Cats....like....fish!   Hi, Mommy.  Oh, Ihavent seen this smile in 17 years!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Dude, Phoebes mom has got a huge peni...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	  Let it go!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Hey!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Umm, when were you gonna tell me that youre going out with ChipMatthews?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Now? Is it okay if I go out with Chip Matthews?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Nooo! Its not okay! I cant believe you would want to afterwhat he did to me!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 What, that little thing at the prom?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Monica! I couldnt find him for two hours! He was having sex withAmy Welch!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Come on, that was back in high school! How could that still bother you?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 I mean why, of all people would you want to go out with Chip?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Look, you and I went to different high schools...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Okay, that doesnt help me, because we went to the same highschool.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 You went to one where you were popular, and you got to ride offChips motorcycle, and wear his letterman jacket. I went to one where I wore a banduniform they had to have specially made.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  They had to have that specially made?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 It was a project for one of the Home Ec classes.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  Oh my God, they told us that was for the mascot!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Back then, I thought that I would never, ever get the chance to go outwith a Chip Matthews, and now hes-hes called me up and asked me out. And thefat girl inside of me really wants to go. I-I owe her this. I never let her eat.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Oh, you go out with him.  
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Oh, really?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Yeah. Just, if its possible, could you leave him somewhere and gohave sex with another guy?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Ill try.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 So you guys having any luck getting rid of the entertainment center?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Well, there were a couple of calls last night, but ah, I dont thinkany of them are gonna work out.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Yes, Joey has a very careful screening process. Apparently, noteveryone is qualified to own wood and nails.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	  Stop it! Stop it! She keeps squirming,trying to get away! Just like when she was alive.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 So Pheebs, how long is your mom gonna be with us?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Well, Im not sure. I mean, I guess until she y'know, gets used tothe fact that theres y'know, a new mom. Y'know, I think shes worried thaty'know, shes gonna, shes gonna be replaced. Well, thats not gonna happen is it? Noo.  Okay, I have to return a call inthe other room.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Why cant you use the phone in here?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Well, Im returning a call from a certain mom at the B-E-A-C-H. Ijust spelled the wrong word. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 So, guys, am I crazy, or does Phoebes mom remind anyone of a cat?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Ross, dont start.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Come on, you-you cant tell me you actually believe that-thattheres a woman inside that cat!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 I believe it.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 No you dont. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Yes, I do.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 No you doy'know what, youre not gonna suck me into this.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Oh sure I am, because you always have to be right.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 I do not always have to beokay, okay. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Jurassic Park could happen.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Tony	 Wow! Thats ah, thats pretty nice!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Pretty nice?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Youll have to pardon my roommate, he wanted to marry this.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Tony	 We dont have 50 bucks, but would you be willing to trade for it?Weve got a canoe.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Y'know, I, I really dont think we need a canoe.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Tony	 You gotta take the canoe!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 All right, just, just take the entertainment center, and then when youget home, throw the canoe away!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Peter	 Were not throwing it away! I built that canoe! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Good for you!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  You guys, youre never gonna believe what I just foundtacked up on a telephone pole!  Look kinda familiar?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Apparently Phoebes mother also goes by the nameJulio.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 You guys, theres a little girl in Soho looking for this cat. Imean, you know what that means?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Yeah-eah! 200 dollar reward, split five ways!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Do we have to tell her?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Yes, we have to tell her!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Oh, but its made her so happy.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Little girl misses her cat. Crazy lady thinks her mother is in a cat.  Okay, y'know what, I have to go havedinner with my son, can I trust that when you see Phoebe, you will tell her.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	All	  Yeah.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Thank you.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 I hate when Ross is right!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 He is right, isnt he?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Y'know what, I think this might be one of the times hes wrong.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	All	 You think?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Oh-no, hes right.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	  Hi. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Hi!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	All	 Hey!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Uh, Pheebs, about your mom...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Yeah?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Hows that going?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 So great. Oh, we took a nap today and my Mom fell asleep on my tummy andpurred.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Thats so sweet.  Im gonna get some coffee. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Huh? Whatd ya say Joe? Ill be right there. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Pheebs...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 I just feel so, uhh.....
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 All right!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Im coming already!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Jeez!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	  Not yet!Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! Not yet! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Hello, Chip.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Hey, Rach! How ya doin?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Im great! Im great. Ive got a great job at Bloomingdales,have wonderful friends, and eventhough Im not seeing anyone right now, Ivenever felt better about myself.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 So ah, Monica ready yet?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Shell be out in a second. So, Chip, hows umm, Amy Welch?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Amy Welch? Wow! I havent seen her since... So, Monica about ready?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 This is the unit for you my friend. Sturdy construction, tons of storagecompartments, some big enough to fit a grown man.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Guy	 What?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Oh yeah! I got in there myself once. My roommate bet me five bucks that Icouldnt, and then he stuck a board through the handles that locked me in. Yeah. Itwas funny til I started feeling like I was in a coffin.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Guy	 No, you, you cant fit in that thing. Thats not deep enough.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Oh yeah?  If I cant,Ill knock five bucks off the price off the unit.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Guy	 All right, you have yourself a deal. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Okay.  See?! I told ya! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Sometimes I get in here just to get away from it! Hey, a nickel!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Here, we are.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Oh my God! You still have the Chipper!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 The what?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Thats what we used to call your ah, your motorcycle in highschool. Y'know how a motorcycle is a Chopper, and youre Chip. Nevermind.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 No, I think its cute. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Wow! A lipper from Chipper.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 So you still in touch with anyone from high school?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Umm. Well, theres Rachel, and umm, I think thats it. Howbout you?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Oh yeah, I still hang with Simmons and Zana, y'know. I see Spindler a lot.Devane, Kelly, and I run into Goldie from time to time. Steve Brown, Zuchoff, McGwire,J.T., Breadsly.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Is that all?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Ehh, y'know after high school, you just kinda lose touch. Oh yeah! I raninto Richard Dorfman.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Ohh, how is he?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Not so good, Simmons and I gave him a wedgie.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Isnt he an architect now?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Yeah, they still wear underwear.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 OH MY GOD!!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  WHAT?!! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Are you all right?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Yeah...
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	  What happened?!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Awww, man! He promised he wouldnt take the chairs!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And where the hellis all of our stuff?!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said he didntthink big enough to fit a grown man!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 SoYou got in voluntarily?!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into that guyagain, do you know what Im gonna do?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 BEND OVER?!!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 ...and then Zana, just let one rip!! 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Look, not that I enjoy talking about people who I went to high schoolwith, cause I do, but umm, maybe we could talk about something else? Like you, Idont even know where you work?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 You know where I work!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 I do?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 The movie theatre, you used to come in all the time.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 You still work at the multiplex?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Oh, like Id give up that job! Free popcorn and candy, anytime Iwant. I can get you free posters for your room.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Thanks, Im set. Do you still live with your parents?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chip	 Oh yeah, but I can stay out as late as I want.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Wow! They really got you guys. Your T.V. The chairs.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, your microwave. The stereo.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	  Aww, man, he took the five of spades!!Oh, no-no-no, here it is!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	  Oh my God! What happened?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Oh, umm, Joey was born, and then 28 years later, I was robbed!!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	  So, how was your date?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Well, y'know how I always wanted to go out with Chip Matthews in highschool?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Um-hmm.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Well, tonight, I actually went out with Chip Matthews in high school.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Oh honey, Im sorry.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 No, its okay, not only did I get to go out with Chip Matthews, Igot to dump Chip Matthews.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Ohh! Thats so great!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 I know!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Hey! So ah, what did the insurance company say?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Oh, they said uh, You dont have insurance here, so stopcalling us.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  You didnt tell her?!  Okay, fine! Pheebs?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Yeah?  Hi!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Hi! Listen uhh, this cat belongs to a little girl. There are flyers allover the place.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Im sorry, sweetie. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Hey, we can take her back with you if you want.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Ohh. Um-hmm. But y'know, she choose to find me. I mean, I have torespect her decision. Right?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler, Monica, Joey, Rachel	 Thats a good call. Right.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 No! No! LookHey, enough is enough! Look, I am sorry that you feelguilty or whatever about spending time with your new mom, but this is not your old mom.This is a cat! Okay, Julio the cat! Not mom! Cat!
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	  Ross,how many parents have you lost?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 None.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Okay, then you dont know what it feels like when one of them comesback. Do you? I believe this is my Mother. Even if Im wrong, who cares? Just be afriend. Okay? Be supportive.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Im sorry.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 I dont know what to say.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 You could.... say youre sorry to her mom.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 I think she would like that.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	  Come here, here, come here, come here,  Mrs.Buffay. Sorry, about what I said, umm, it was, it was insensitive of me to say that youwere just a cat. When clearly you are also the reincarnated spirit, of my friendsmother.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Thank you. We both forgive you.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 So honey, what are you gonna do about the little girl?
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay, listen, umm, Mom, I hope you know you still mean a lot tome. And youre welcome to come back anytime.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Chandler	 Pheebs, if she could come back as a couch, wed really appreciateit. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Phoebe	 Come on, Mom, Ill take you home.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Rachel	 Ill go with you.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Monica	 Me too. 
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Ross	 Oh! Y'know, Ive got an extra futon.
04	02	0402	The One With The Cat	Joey	 Dude, you dont have to brag! We got nothing here!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Hey!! We are so in luck! Treeger said that wecould have all this cool stuff from the basement. Wait right there. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, Im, Im paddling away!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	  Huh?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Wow! Really?! We get all this rusty crap for free?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Uh-huh. This and a bunch of bubble wrap. And,some of it is not even popped! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Could we be more white trash?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  How desperate am I?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Oh! Good thing Chandlers not here, he always wins atthis game.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 I just told my Mom Id cater a party for her.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 How come?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Because I need the money, and I thought that itd be agreat way to get rid of that last little schmidgen of self-respect.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Ross	 Come on, I think this is a good thing. I dont think Momwouldve hired you if she didnt think you were good at what you do.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 You dont have to stick up for her. She cant hereyou.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	  Hey! Umm, do you guys have any juice?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Just pickle.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Hey uh, Rach, funny story. I ah, bumped into Joanna on thestreet yesterday.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 My boss, Joanna? Wow, that mustve been awkward.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Well, no, actually she uh, asked me if I wanted to get adrink.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	  You ah, you didnt say Yes to thatdid you?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  No. No!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Hello,Rachel. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Well, not at first.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 What is she doing here?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 I dont understand! Last time you went out with her yousaid she was a big, dull dud.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Well, I think I judged her too quickly, and this time wewere able to take the relationship to the next level.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Well, last time I almost got fired. You must end it, you mustend it now!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Oh, come on! Its not like this is an everydayoccurrence for me! I mean usually Im pretty much just in there by myself.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Chandler!!  Promise me, you will endit.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Okay, I promise, Ill end it.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Thank you.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 I hope you know what Im giving up for ya, becauseshes not just the boss in your office, if you know what I mean.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Yeah-eh-eah!  Oh-oh, sorry, I-I knew whathe meant.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	  Hows the hired help?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Doing great, the quiches are coming along.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Whats this? Blue nail polish?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Yeah, I thought it was cute.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Ahh, thats what your Grandmothers handslooked like when we found her.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Let me ask you a question.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Hmm.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Why did you hire me?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, well Richard raved about the food at his party, ofcourse you were sleeping with him. Then I heard the food at that lesbian wedding was verynice, I assume you werent sleeping with anybody there. Though, at least that wouldbe something. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  Oh my God! Did you hear that? She hired me becauseshe thinks Im good.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Okay, I didnt hear that.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Oh yeah, she didnt hire me out of pity, it wasntso she could pick on me in front of her friends, she actually thinks Im good.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Wow! And hey, its cool if youre a lesbian! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	  Good afternoon,are you the decision maker of the house?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Uhhhh. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Do you ah, currently own a set of encyclopedias? 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 No! No. But ah, try the classifieds, people sell everything inthere.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Actually, Im not buying. Im selling. Let meask you one question. Do your friends ever have a conversation and you just nod along eventhough youre not really sure what theyre talking about?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Ross	 Im telling you its totally unconstituional.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica, Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel	 Oh yeah, I totally agree.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 I think he deserves a Nobel Prize. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	All	 Nooo!! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 it was like the Algonquin kids table. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	  Excuse me, Im sorry,you havent said anything for about two and a half minutes, are you at allinterested?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Yeah-well-yeah! Yeah-oh-yeah. Come on in.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Thats weird.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 What?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Your nails.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Oh, I know, I never wear fake ones. I just did it so my Momwouldnt give me grief about me biting them.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Oh, no, I meant that its weird that you only have ninenow.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  Oh my God. Wait a minute, I had themput  Oh my God! Its in the quiche! Oh My God!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Okay, dont panic. Im gonna go to the store,Im gonna get you another set of nails, no ones gonna know, and youregonna look great.  Oh! Oh, its causetheyre gonna eatthats the problem.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	   Honey, dont bite your nails.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Okay ah, please dont freak out. Umm, but ah,theres a blue fingernail in one of the quiche cups, and theres no way to knowwhich one.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 And! Whoever finds it wins the prize!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	  Im not freaking out.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Then why are you laughing?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Its nothing, its just that now your Fatherowes me five dollars.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 What? You bet Id lose a nail?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Oh no, dont be silly. I just bet Id needthese. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Frozen lasagnas?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Um-hmm.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 You bet that Id screw up?! So all that stuff abouthiring me because I was good was
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 No-no-no, that was all true. This was just in case youpulled a Monica.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 You promised Dr. Weinburg, youd never use that phrase.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Oh honey, come on, have a sense of humour, youvenever been able to laugh at yourself.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  Thats right. My Mom doesnt have any faithin me! Oh, thats hilarious! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 I dont get it.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 No, I have faith
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  No! You have lasagnas! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Oven	 Ding!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Op, the ruined quiches are ready.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 It just doesntfeel like were breaking up.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 No, we are. Im sad.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Okay.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Yes.  Uh, cant you waituntil tomorrow?  All right.  Unbelievable!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Thanks.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 No, no, that was my boss. I have to go.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Okay. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 What are you doing?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Im getting dressed.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Why?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 When I walk outside naked people throw garbage at me.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Wait. I wanna show you something.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 What is it?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Just a little gag gift somebody gave me.  Put your hands together.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Ah-ha, youre not the boss of me. Yeah, you are!  Ooh, saucy.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Ill be back in ten minutes. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 You are, youre gonna leave me like this?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Knowing youre here, waiting for me I think itskinda exciting.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Okay. But if you dont come back soon,  theres pretty much nothing I can do about it!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Oh.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Sophie	 Hi! I brought you back a macaroon!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Oh great! Ill keep it in my butt with your nose. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Thats weird, she locked the door.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Sophie	 Yknow why? Shes got the Christmas bonus list inthere. I saw her working on it this morning.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Okay, swear you wont tell, but when Mark left he gave mea key to Joannas office. Do you wanna see the list?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Sophie	 Yeah!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Hi!  How are you?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Hello, Joannas office.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Im really sorry but I may be a littlewhile longer.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 How little?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 A couple of hours, I feel awful.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Look, this isnt funny! You get back here right now!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 I cant!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Why not?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Im in my bosss car!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 What?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Uh-oh, tunnel. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	   What?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  Rachel, could I see youfor a moment?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Okay, heres the situation. The keys to the cuffs areon the back of the door. Could you be a doll and grab them and scoot on over and unlockme? And on a totally different subject, that is a lovely pantsuit.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 You promised you would break up with her!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 I did break up with her! She just took it really, reallywell!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 And the fact that you were jeopardising my career neverentered your mind?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 It did enter my mind! But then something happened that madeit, shoot right out.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Y'know what Chandler, you got yourself into those cuffs, youget yourself out of them.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 No-no-no-no-no-no-no!! I cant get myself right out ofthem! You must have me confused with the Amazing Chandler!! Come on, you have to unlockme, she could be gone for hours, and Im cold, and 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Oh, Chandler!! All right, this is it!  Younever see Joanna again!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Never!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 You never come into this office again!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Fine!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 You give me back my Walkman!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Inever borrowed your Walkman.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Well, then I lost it. You buy me one!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 You got it! Here we go! Come on! This is great!  Ahhh! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Does it hurt?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 No, I just always see guys doing this when they gethandcuffs taken off them.  Hello sweet pants!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Wait a minute! What are you gonna tell Joanna?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 About what?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 When she sees that youre gone, shes gonna knowthat I let you out, and that I was in here, and Im gonna get fired!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Ill make something up! Im good at lying, Iactually did borrow your Walkman!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 No, theres nothing to make up, shes gonna knowthat I have a key to her office, Ive got to get you locked up back the way you were!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Oh-ho-ho, I dont think so!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Well, this is much better.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 So, heres somebody interesting, Joey. What do youknow about Van Gogh?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 He cut off his ear.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 And?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Im out.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 He painted that. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Wow! Thats pretty nice. I thought he cut off his earcause he sucked. What else you got in there?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Lets see, ahhh Where does the Pope live?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 In the woods. No wait-wait, thats the joke answer.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Actually its, Vatican City. Now ahh, what do you knowabout vulcanised rubber?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Spocks birth control.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	  You need these books.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Hi.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 This used to be your room?  Wow! Youmustve been in really good shape as a kid.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Ohh, Im such an idiot. I cant believe I actuallythought she could change.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Well, who cares what your Mom thinks? So you pulled a Monica.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Oh good, Im glad thats catching on.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 No but, why does that have to be a bad thing. Just change whatit means. Y'know? Go down there and prove your Mother wrong. Finish the job you were hiredto do, and well call that pulling a Monica.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 What?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Okay, umm, if a kid gets straight As, his parents wouldsay, "Yeah, he pulled a Monica." Y'know? Or a fireman saves a baby, and they go,"Yeah I know, he pulled a Monica." Or someone hits a homerun and the announcersays, "Yeah, that ones outta here." Though some things dont change.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  All right, Ill go down there. But, Imnot gonna serve the lasagna. Im gonna serve something I make.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Wow! My breasts are really strong. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Chandler! Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up backthe way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, shes very private about her office.Now I know why.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Hey, look, youre in trouble either way! Okay? If shecomes back and sees me locked to this instead of the chair, shes gonna know you werein here. So you might as well just let me go.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 What if I clean your bathroom for a month?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 It still wouldnt be clean.  All I want is my freedom.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Foot rubs for a month!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Freedom!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Ill take all of your photos and put them into photoalbums!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Freedom! I want my freedom! Why wont you here me?! Sophie, help me! Help me!! 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Sophie sit!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 No! God, would you just calm down!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Im gonna say this for the last time. Would you pleasejust 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Wow! Theres a lot I didnt know about vomit.   In a minute. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 So, what do you say, Joey? You get the whole set ofencyclopedias for twelve hundred dollars, which works out to just 50 bucks a book!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Twelve hundred dollars? You think I have $1200? Im home inthe middle of the day, and I got patio furniture in my living room. I guess theres afew things you dont get from book learnin.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Well ah, what can you swing?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 How about zero down and zero a month for a long, long time?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 You dont have, anything?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 You wanna see what I got? Okay? Ive got a baby Tootsie Roll, a movie stub, keys, a Kleenex, a rock, and anarmy man. Hey!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 Okay, I-I get the picture. Uh, thanks, for your time.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 And a 50.  Huh, these must beChandlers pants.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	The Salesman	 For 50 bucks, you can get one book! What will it be? A?B? C?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Oh, I-I think Im gonna stick with the V, I wanna see howthis bad boy turns out.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 I ah, will buy and wrap all of your Christmas gifts.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 No!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 I ah Oh! Ill squeeze you fresh orange juice everymorning!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 With extra pulp?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	  Yeah!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 No!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Doh!!  Ive got it!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 You dont have it.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 I have so got it. Theres gonna berumours about this, theres no way to stop it. Sophie knows, Monica and Phoebe know.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 How do Monica and Phoebe know?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Oh, I called them. And when they ask me what I saw, I can bevery generous  or very  stingy.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  Go on.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 I can make you a legend. I can make you this generationsMilton Berle.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 And Milton Berle has a
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Ohh, not compared to you. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Well?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Theyre not even touching the lasagna!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Really?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Oh, they love your casserole.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Yes!!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Its hard to believe that just a little while ago thiswas nothing but ingredients.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	  Well, everyone seems to be enjoying your dish.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 And you?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 I thought it was quite tasty.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 So if everyone liked it, and you liked it, that would makethis a success. Which would make you
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	  A bitch?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Well, I was going for wrong, but we can use your word.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 Yes, well I was wrong, and I have to say you reallyimpressed me today.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Wow!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Umm, you might even say that she pulled a Monica.   She doesnt know we switched it. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Mrs. Geller	 And the next time you cater for me, there will be nothingbut ice in the freezer. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 That really means a lot. Oh, and Mom, dont bite yournails.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  Hello.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey, Rachel, Ross	 Hey!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	  Hello, Chandler. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  I love you. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Wh-whats going on?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Oh. 
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 No he doesnt!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	  Two hours, that lasted!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 So did you break up with Joanna?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 I think so.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Well, its good thing you got out when you did, before sheblew up like that Vesuvius.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Ross	 The volcano?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Yeah. And speaking of volcanoes, man are they a violent igneousrock formation.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 What?!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Oh yeah, lava spewing, hot ash, of course some are dormant.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Why are you talking about volcanoes all of the sudden?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joey	 Well, we can talk about something else. What do you want to talkabout? Vivisection? The Vasdeferens? The Vietnam War?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Monica	 Oh! Did anybody see that-that documentary on the Korean War?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	All	 Oh, yeah. Yeah.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Phoebe	 Oh God, Korea is such a beautiful country.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Ross	 With such a sad history.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Chandler	 Could there be more Kims?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	  Whos out there?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Its me! Good morning!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 Rachel, could you come in here for a moment, please?
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Yeah, sure. Umm, they didnt have poppy seed bagels, soI  Oh my word!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 I seem to have had a slight office mishap. Could you pleaseget the key off the back of the door for me.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Oh, yeah! Yeah!
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Joanna	 You tell your friend Chandler that were definatelybroken up this time.
04	03	0403	The One With The Cuffs	Rachel	 Okay.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Hey! New wallet, huh?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Yeah, it was time. The old condom ring in the leather justdoesnt say cool anymore.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Rachel!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 What?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 You just put an empty carton back in the fridge!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Oh yeah, I know, but the garbage was full.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Have you ever taken out the trash? 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Well, I thought you liked doing it. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Third door on the left.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Right!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Oh! Hey, Mr. Treeger.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Hey.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: What are you doing?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Ummm. Oh! Im sorry. Its a little old but
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: No! Youre clogging up the chute that I spent a half-hourunclogging!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Im sorry. I didntI dont come in here a lot.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Oh yeah, of course you dont!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 No.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Cause youre a little princess! "Daddy, buy me apizza. Daddy, buy me a candy factory. Daddy, make the cast of Cats sing HappyBirthday to me"
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 I didnt I never said that.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: You think you could make a mess and the big man in coveralls willcome in here and clean it up, huh? Well, why dont think of someone else for achange?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	  Okay, Im sorry. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 God! If youre gonna cry about it! (She grabs the box and goes tothrough it out.]
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, Treeger made you cry?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Yes! And he said really mean things that were only partly true. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Im gonna go down there and teach that guy a lesson.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Joey, please dont do that. I think its best that we justforget about it.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Thats easy for you to say, you werent almost just killed.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right thats it, school is in session! 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	  My God! Is this a gymcard?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Oh yeah, gym member. I try to go four times a week, but Ivemissed the last 1200 times.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 So why dont you quit?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 You dont think Ive tried? You think I like having50 dollars taken out of my bank account every month? No, they make you go all the way downthere! Then they use all of these phrases and peppiness to try and confuse you! Then theybring out Maria.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Who is Maria?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Oh Maria. You cant say no to her, shes like this lycraspandex covered gymtreat.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 You need me to go down there with you and hold your hand?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 No!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 So youre strong enough to face her on your own?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Oh no, youll have to come.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Tribbiani! Hold on, Ill get the plunger.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Hey! You hold on pal! Now you made my friend, Rachel, cry. So now,youre gonna go up there and apologize to her, unless you want me to call thelandlord.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: And tell him what?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Have you heard about a little something called, Not Making Girls Cry.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah. Well maybe you have heard about the Rent Stabilization Actof 1968!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 I have actually not heard of that.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah, well your friends are in violation of it. Ive been anice guy up until now, but uh, I dont need this grief. Im gonna call thelandlord and tell him that Monica is illegally subletting here grandmothersapartment. Your friends are outta here pal.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Why dont you tell me something I dont know! 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Oh please, somebody tell me I dont have to go to work today!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Whats the matter?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Oh, my first massage today is this incredibly gorgeous guy, and everytime I see him I just want to do things to him that Im not allowed to charge for.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 So do them for free.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Oh no, it is forbidden! No-no, Mrs. Potter fires people for foolingaround with clients. And its against my oath as a masseuse.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 They make you take an oath?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 No, I made myself take an oath. Yeah, no fooling around with clients andumm, always be prepared. Yeah, that ones actually from the Boy Scouts, but it justmakes good sense.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Why dont you just give him to somebody else?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 No, I can handle it. No, Im a professional. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Oh Pheebs, is that a new ankle bracelet?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Wow! And you got a petticure. Your feet are all dressed up.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Because thats the only part of you he can see when hes onthe table!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Youre gonna do some feet flirtin!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 I dont what your talking about. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Then how do you explain the toe ring?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Because its Arabian princess day at work! Okay?! Leave me alone!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Oh! My hero! What happened?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Well uh, I went down there and told him that no one treats my friends likethat and that hed better come up here and apologize. Ill see you later.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 What a minute, what did he say?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 He said that he wasnt gonna apologize because you guys are livinghere illegally, so instead what hes gonna do is have you evictedIll seeyou later.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 What?! You got us evicted!!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 I told you not to go down there!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Well he made Rachel cry!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Rachel always cries!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Thats not true! 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Now Joey, you go down there and you suck up to him. I mean you suck likeyouve never sucked before!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right! Ill try! But if I cant, you can stay with Chandlerand I until you get settled.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Go!!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right, all right, all right.  I mean Ill have to check with him first, but Ill think hell becool with it. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, hey! Now remember what we talked about, you gotta bestrong.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Yes.  Yes!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 One more time, "Hey, dont you want a washboard stomach and rockhard pecs?"
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 No! I want a flabby gut and saggy man breasts!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Good! Thats good!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Okay.   I wanna quit the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	 You wanna quit?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 I wanna quit the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	 You do realize that you wont have access to our new fullservice Swedish spa.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	  Iwanna quit the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	 Okay, Dave in the membership office, handles quitters.  Uh, excuse me,  are you a member?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Me? No.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	 Sorry, members only.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	  I wanna quit the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Its okay man, be strong. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	  So, are you a member of any gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 No! And Im not gonna be, so you can save you little speech.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Gym Employee	 Okay, no problem.  Could you comehere for a second?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Woman	 Hi, Im Maria.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	  Wow, you have really pretty feet.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 These old things.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Would you mind spending some time on my siadic area, its beenkilling me today.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 You mean theOkay by siadic, you mean the towel covered portion.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Yeah.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Sure, yeah, no I can do that, yeah, because umm, y'know, the muscles inthe siadic area can get yknow, real  nice and tight. So umm,tell me Rick, how umm, how did you injure the area.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Oh, a 16-hour sit-in for Greenpeace.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Oh. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Ow! Did you just bite me?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 No!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: What?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Please dont kick Monica and Rachel out, this wasnt therefault, it was mine.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: You want me to kick you guys out instead?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No you cant do that, where would the chick and the duck live?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: You have pets!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Noo-no-no, no, those are nicknames. Im the chick and Chandler is theduck.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Huh, I wouldve thought it was the other way around.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Come on man, just-just let the girls stay, Ill do whatever you want.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Really? Youll do anything?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, absolutely.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah, Ive got something you can do.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 What, what is it?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Can you be my dancing partner?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Thats not, prison lingo, is it?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 His dancing partner?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Yeah, theres this superintendents dance, the Super Ball. Idont know, and he wants to impress Marge, this lady super that hes a crush on.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Well, why doesnt he practice with a girl?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Well, hes too shy, he doesnt thing hes good enough todance with girls yet.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Yeah, right, he almost danced me right down thatgarbage chute.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Oh, would you let it go already?! Youre fine!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Hey.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Hey! So, did you quit?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 No, I almost did, couldnt leave Ross there without a spotter!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Wait, now so you joined the gym?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 And thats funny, why?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Oh, umm, I was just yknow working out and umm Oh,thats it.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Were doomed. Okay, theyre gonna take 50 bucks out of ouraccounts for the rest of our lives. What are we gonna do?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Well, you could actually go to the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Or! Or, we could go to the bank, close our accounts and cut them off atthe source.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Youre a genius!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Aww, man, now we wont be bank buddies!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Now, theres two reasons.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	  Hey.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	All	 Hey!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Ohh, you guys, remember that cute client I told you about? I bit him.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Where?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 On the touchy.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 And thats not against your oath?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 No, I know! I-Im sorry, but the moment I touch him, I just wannathrow out my old oath and take a new, dirty one.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Well, next time your massaging him, you should try and distractyourself.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Like-like when Im doing something exciting and Idont wanna get too excited, I just ahh, yknow try to thing of otherthings like ah sandwiches, and ah baseball, and ah Chandler!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Thank you, Joey.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No-no, thank you.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right, Im here, lets ahh, get this over with.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Okay ahh, well, just ahh, follow my lead. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, dont we need to do some kinda preparation first? Likeahh, get really drunk?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Look come on, eh, just ah, just ah, put your arms around me, eh.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Ahhhh! Im sorry!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No, its okay, but if Im Marge, my breasts are coming out myback.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Ahh, forget it! Ill never be any good at this, my mom wasright, Im just a big potato with arms, and legs, and a head.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Come on man, youre not a potato.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Im sure as hell a dancer, its no use Marge will nevergo for me.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Come on Treeger, dont say that. You just ahh, you just need morepractice. Here, come on, lets ahh, lets try it again. Come on.  Plus, it was, it was probably mostly my fault, anyway. I mean, yknow,Im not really that comfortable dancing with a We-he!! Hey!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Hey-hey, how goes the dancing? Gay yet?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Ah-ha-ha, you guys owe me big time. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	  What was that?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 What?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 You just did a little dancy thing.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No I didnt.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Yes you did! You did like a little hop.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 You are soo enjoying this.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No, Im not! And it wasnt a hop it was a pademarie. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	  You know the words! You are so into this!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right, well maybe Im enjoying it a little bit. I mean Imgetting pretty good at it.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Ooh, this is soo sweet, Joey our little twinkle-toes.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Hey-hey, hold on, this isnt some kind of like girly dance. Allright, its like a sport, its manly!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 All right, then show me some manly moves.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 All right.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 I dont know how to lead.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Hello.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Hi.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 Wed like to close our accounts.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Bank Officer	 Close your accounts? Is there some kind of problem?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 No-no.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 No, wed just like to close them.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Bank Officer	 Okay, Ms. Lambert handles all our closures. Would you come over here please?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ms. Lambert	 Hi, Im Karen.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 I wanna quit the bank!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	  Okay, baseball. Rick, playing baseball. Okay,slides into second, maybe even his pants come down a little Oh nowait no, no!No! Okay, all right, sandwiches, sandwiches. Umm, okay, on a plate, maybe Rickspants come down a little. No! No! Okay, Chandler! Okay Chandler, ooh, thats working.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	  Chandlers knees. Chandlersankles. Chandlers ankle hair.  Oh no.  Okay, youreall set.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Oh wow! That was amazing, was that really just an hour?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Yeah! In really long hour world.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 What?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Ugh, okay, I have an enormous crush on you. But because youre aclient, I cant ask you out, even though you give me yknow, the feeling.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Wow! I had no idea! But you know, I could always find another masseuse. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Really?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Yeah, really.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 What?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rick	 Suddenly, I very aware that Im naked.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	  Okay, quit down. 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mrs. Potter	 Mr. Simons been waiting for Oh myGod!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Simon	 Why wasnt I offered that? Id definitely pay more forthat.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mrs. Potter	 Phoebe, we have rules here, this isnt that kind of place.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, oh and I know, but this isnt what it looks like,cause Rick is my ahh, husband.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mrs. Potter	 Oh really? Well, then youd better tell his other wife,cause she called three times asking where he is.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Yes, I will tell her.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 So you didnt leave the bank?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Ross	 No! And somehow, we ended up with a joint checking account.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 What are you ever gonna use that for?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 To pay for the gym.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Hey.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Hey! So I had a great day, Rick and I really hit it off, and we startedmaking out, and then my boss walked in and fired me for being a whore.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 What?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 You got fired?! 
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Monica	 Oh my Gosh!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Its so weird, I have never been fired from anything before!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Rachel	 Sweety...
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 I just-I just started walking around not knowing what to do next,yknow? I-I started asking people on the street if they wanted massages. Then thesepolicemen, thought I was a whore too. Its been a really bad day, whore wise.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Hey Duck, is Chick here?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Chandler	 Yeah Bunny-rabbit.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	  So you ah, ready for our last practice?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah, but yknow, I think the reason were not gettingthat spin right is because my apartments too small.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Look, you wanna use our place?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: No, I ahh, had another idea.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 We did it!!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: I know, we did it!! Hey, that was incredible, huh?!
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 I know, it was amazing! I mean, we totally nailed it, it was beautiful.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Thank you, listen, thanks a lot Tribbiani, . Oh myGod, look at the time, I gotta catch the bus to the ball.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Oh well, okay, good luck.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Unless you wanna practice the Foxtrot again? Or-or the Tango?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Ahh, thanks but no. You see I-I think Im ready to dance withgirls.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Okay.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 Go get em Treeger.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Right.  Hey, ahh, you wanna come? Marge has agirlfriend.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	  Really?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Mr. Treeger	: Yeah, you could dance real good with her, shes the same sizeas me.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Joey	 No, Im good.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Interviewer	 So it looks like youve got some great experience here.Lets see ahh, reason for leaving last job?
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Yeah, they thought I was a whore.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Interviewer	 Okay, well give a call if anything comes up.
04	04	0404	The One With The Ballroom Dancing	Phoebe	 Great! Thank you very much.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hello! What's this? Oh right its thatgirl's phone number.  Yeah-yeah, there it is, just a phone number areally hot girl gave me.  It's no big deal, I mean it is her home phone number, but... Whoa!  Whoa-whoops, I almost lost this baby! Yeah, the lovelyAmanda gives me her number and I-I go and drop it. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Thank you.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 Rachel?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 When's your birthday?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 May fifth, why?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 Oh, I-I'm just making a list of people's birthdays.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Oh, mine's December...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 Yeah, whatever. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Ohh, she's pretty. Pretty ahh, pretty girl, the pretty--she's pretty.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Just go up to her and ask her out.  Oh, what's theworst thing that could happen?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 I could die.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Yeah, it's-it's tough being single. That's why I'm so glad I found Amanda.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Ross, you guys went out once. You took your kids to Chucky Cheese,and you didn't even kiss her.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 I tell people secrets. It makes them like me.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Oh.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Phoebe! You're sick, you shouldn't play. You should just go home, get inbed, and stay there.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  But I'm unemployed, my music is allI really have now. Well music, and making my own shoes.  Pretty, huh? 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 All right, I'm gonna do it! I'm gonna get shot down. Any advice?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Just be yourself. But, not too much.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	   Wish me luck.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Good luck!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Wish it!  Hi. Hi, I-I was just sittingover there, and uhh, Chandler. My name is Chandler. Did I say that?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 No, you didn't. Hi, I'm Kathy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Uh Kathy, with K or a C?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 With a K.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh-oh-hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Wow! You are really good at this.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey, come on, give me a break, I'm out on a limb here.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 I'm sorry, you're right, I apologize, but I should tell you that I'mwaiting for a date.  Oh, and there he is now.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey! Hey, hey-hey, hey. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey, I see you guys already met, huh?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Yes-yes, I was just trying to figure out a way to uh, demonstrate howI could get my exceptionally large feet into my even bigger mouth.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Didn't I tell ya? Always showin' off.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Before I start, I just wanna say that umm, I have a cold, so if I sneezein the middle of song, it's not on purpose. Oh, except the last verse of Pepper People. Smelly cat, smelly cat. What are they feeding you?  This chick sounds good.  Smelly cat, smelly--Hey Gunther, be a good little boy and bring me a whiskey.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  Hi!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Hi.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Jeez, at 2:30 in the morning, I didn't expect to have to fight overthe remote.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 I'm sorry, it's just this Ernie Cofax thing on in a few minutes I wantedto watch.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh my God! That's why I got up too!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 You're kidding! Oh, I love him.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey, listen, I'm sorry about this afternoon, y'know, if I would'veknown you guys were... I never would've...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Oh please!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 So ah, Joey tells me you two met in acting class.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Yeah, they teamed us up as partners. Joey picked three scenes for us todo; all of them had us making out.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 That's a good thing actually, because ah, he used to have me rehearsewith him.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	  Oh-oh-oh-oh!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Is it on?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 No, but this wonder broom is amazing!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Oh my God!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh! It's on! It's on!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 There we go little fella.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	  What about the duck?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Well the duck can swim.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Oh, jeez. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  My sticky shoes, my sticky-sticky shoes, why do youstick on me, ba-a-by! Thanks for the lights honey. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	All	 Way to go, Phoebe!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 That cold makes you sound so great.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 It's fun, God I love how sexy I am. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Oh, Kath, we should get going. We're going to by hamsters.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	All	 Ooh, that's great, I love those little guys.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 No, no, it's not like that. I, I work for a medical researcher.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Well, have fun!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Okay.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Well, I think it's great that the medical community is finally trying tohelp sick hamsters.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Y'know what, I like Kathy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh yeah, me too, she's so cool and pretty.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah, she's...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 She's smart and funny, y'know? We were up all last night talking, shesaid the funniest thing about--what? 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 You love her.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 No, I don't.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Yes, you do. Chandler loves Kathy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Come on, Pheebs lay off him.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Thank you, Ross.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Yeah, he's a little sensitive right now, `cause he's so in love.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 All right.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	All	 Ohh!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 All right.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	  Ooh, umm, oh Kathy! Kathy, I love you! Oh! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 So, I need to write some depressing stuff to go along with my new floozyvoice, but nothing that sad has ever really happened to me.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Oh umm, how about your mom dying, or having to live on the streets whenyou were 14?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. Oh, yeah, I could write about the time my hair did that"Woo-hoo" thing.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Hey.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  So I'm going over to Amanda's tonight!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Rachel's not here.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Oh.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 How's it going with her?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Great, actually. I'm thinking tonight, maybe the night. Yeah, I mean ah,the kids are gonna play together and then when they're asleep, I'm thinking Amanda and Ibreak open a bottle of wine, and do a little "playing" ourselves.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Hi guys! This is Josh. Josh, these are myfriends, and that's Ross.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Hi, Josh.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Hi.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Josh	 Dudes.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 So, did you play in college?  sweatshirt he's wearing.)
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Josh	 Oh, I still do. Next year, I hope to make varsity though.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Ross, didn't you ah, play soccer in High School? Oh no wait, that'sright. You just organized their game schedules on your Commodore 64.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Josh	 Well, it's getting late, I've got to get to the game, so I'm gonna...head.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Okay.  I'll miss you.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Josh	 Dope! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Wow, cute one!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Very!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I know, isn't he great? It's so nice to finally be in a funrelationship, y'know? There's nothing boring about him, and ah, I bet he's never set footin a museum.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well maybe he'll get to go soon, like on a class trip or something.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Y'know what else is really great about him, oh, what is the word for theadult that doesn't have dinosaur toys in their bedroom?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Oh! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 What was that?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Monica knows.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 It's this dumb thing that Ross made up `cause he was trying to fool ourparents. It's a way of giving the finger, without actually having to give it. I remember Icried the night you made it up, `cause it was the first time that I realized that I wasactually cooler than my older brother.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Well, I'm gonna go get ready,  for my datetonight, so ah, I'll just_ head.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Yeah, I should go to, `cause I'm playing in one hour. Hey,  you guys should come hear me, ooh hear me. Ooh,  My sticky shoes--eww! Eww! I lost my sexy phlegm!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	  Hi!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Hi!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	 Hi Ben!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Wow! You-you look great!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	 Thanks!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Okay!  Hey Tommy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	 I am so glad that you could come over tonight.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Oh no-no-no, it's my pleasure.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	 Okay, well, my cell phone number is right here on the counter, pleasehelp yourself to anything in the fridge.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 What?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	 I appreciate this soo much, I've been trying to go out with this guy forlike a month.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 I-I-I...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Amanda	  Oh, I don't mean to be a square,but I'd really appreciate it if you wait and drink your wine after the kids are asleep? Ohuh, thanks for this, I hope I can do the same for you sometime. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Who wants to make some long distance calls?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Kathy! Kathy! Hi!! Kathy! Kathy!  Kathy!  Fetch! Fetch it!  Kathy! Kathy! Kathy!  Kathy!  Kathy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Hey, Chandler! What are you doing here?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Oh, I just wanted to say, "Hey!"
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Okay. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Oh come on! You're making it sound worse than it actually was.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Her date tipped me ten dollars. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Pheebs, what are you doing?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Okay, I wanna be sexy again so I'm trying to catch a cold. It should beeasy, supposedly they're pretty common.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Phoebe, you'll catch pneumonia.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  Okay. You were right. I'm in love with Joey's girlfriend.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 What?!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Are you serious?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Well, how-how-how is that possible? You barely know her!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 I don't know. I can't--I just, I can't get her out of my head. Y'know?I mean, I'm a very bad person. I'm a very, very bad person. I'm a horrible person.  No you're not Chandler! We still love youChandler!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	  Oh gosh, Phoebe, I think I caught your cold.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 You mean you stole it!  Don't cover your mouthwhen you do that!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	  We were just talking about you.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Really?!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, I told her about the time you got drunk and fell asleep withyour head in the toilet.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	  Right in there!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 99...100! Ready or not, here I come!  All right, let's go over theconcept one more time.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	  Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Hey guys.  Listen uh, you wanna get some dinner with me andKathy tonight?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Ohh, umm, y'know what, I already ate.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 It's 4:30.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Y'know I had a big meal on Monday, y'know. So that's just gonna get mestraight through the week.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Okay, I see what's going on here.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 You-you do?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Yeah! You don't like Kathy.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 You got me.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Yeah, you've been avoiding her ever since we started going out. Look, Imade an effort to like Janice, now I think it's your turn to make aneffort to like Kathy by going out to dinner with us. Right?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Yeah. Right.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Good, and hey! My treat.  Butthat's only because you're not eating anything, right?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Okay.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	  Ross isn't here.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Oh.  Stop it!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Josh	 So I'll see you at the party? Beer's beer man, 24, 7!!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah!   I am soo gonnamarry that guy.  Ohhh!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 What?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I think he's stealing from me.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Why?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Because he's stealing from me!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Hi! It's me. And soup.  Hey, I just saw Josh, helooks so yummy in your leather jacket.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Ughh! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Here, now I don't eat chicken, so it's just noodle soup. Andthere's no chicken in the broth either, so it's really just... noodle water. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Thank you so much Phoebe.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Sure.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 What are you doing with those?!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 But, I need your germs! I want my cold back! I miss my sexy voice.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Sorry, Phoebe.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 It's okay. How's the soup?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Umm. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Ohhhh!! Gross!!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Ohh, God, guys, check it out, you can see that girl's underwear!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Is she great or what?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	  So? Huh? What do you think?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Ohh, she's-she's not really my type.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Not your type?! She's gorgeous!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Y'know what I think it is? It's the fishnet stockings. Y'know?Whenever I see a girl in fishnet stockings it reminds me of my father in fishnetstockings.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Okay. Understanding a little more why you're single. Ohh! Y'know, I havea friend you would like, she's really pretty. And then we could double date!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Uhh, no-no thanks.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Kathy	 Okay, I've got some ugly friends, and they're all available too.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Listen, I-I'm gonna grab a beer. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	  I'll be right back.  What was that?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 What?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Kathy was being really nice and you just walked away. I thought we had adeal.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Hey, look, what do you want from me?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 I want you to like her! But if that's too damned difficult for you, thenthe least you can do is pretend.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 I am pretending.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Well then, do it better!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Okay, what do you saw I go over there and say how much I like her? No-no it'll be good, I can tell her much I've been thinkingabout her. That I haven't stopped thinking about her since the moment I met her. That I'mso fantastically, over-the-top, wanna-slit-my-own-throat in love with her, that for everyminute of every hour of every day I can't believe my own damn bad luck that you met herfirst!!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	 Well, that's pretty good. But you might wanna tone it down a little.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	  Hey! So, uhh, Amanda just-just dropped me off. Yeah, that's oneof the things I love about her, she's...uh, she's old enough to drive.  So uhh,I guess you're not going to mom and dad's tonight?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 No, sorry.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Well where's Amanda?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Hey Rach, could you get me some cough drops?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 I mean y'know, I'm thinking. You could bring her, and you guys could goup to your old room, and not make out.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 Ross, cough drops, please?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 At least I know she's not going out with me to get into R rated movies.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Why don't you just marry her? Oh no, wait a minute you can't, I'm sorryI forgot, she's not a lesbian.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 You see Amanda and I have a very special...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	  You have nothing! You're not even going out! You're herbaby sitter! You have a 12-year-old girl's job!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Ohh, that is soo sad.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 And what are you laughing at, Miss`My-keg-sucking-boyfriend-is-stealing-from-me!'
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Hey, so he stole a couple bucks from me! At least he bought me somethingwith it! 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Monica	 That's mine!! Now, would you both please start acting like adults? Andget me my cough drops!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Fine.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Sorry.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Ross	 Here.   At least I made ten bucksin my relationship.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Y'know...
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  Platting goats are platting. Platting down the street.Platting goats are platting, leaving little treats.  Does it even workwithout my sexy voice?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 I like it. 
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	 Gunther, kiss me.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 What?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Joey	  Hey!  Now, we're not actuallygonna be sleeping in her, but do you mind?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Chandler	 Can I sleep on your couch?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Phoebe	  And I'm still waiting for my paper mache man. Thankyou my babies.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 Rachel?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 I don't know if you heard about what happened between me and Phoebe theother day_
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	 No!
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 Well, we kissed. I-I-I didn't initiate the kiss, but-but I also didn'tstop it, and I've been feeling guilty.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Okay.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 So umm, are we cool?
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Rachel	  Okay.
04	05	0405	The One With Joey's New Girlfriend	Gunther	 I knew you'd understand.
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 So, thank you for the delicious dinner. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 You're welcome for a delicious dinner. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Hey what are you guys looking at? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Ross and the most beautiful girl in the world. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah, come to papa. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 I know! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Probably the only time I'll ever say this, but did you see the asson her? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Where did you, when did you, how did you...  How did you get a girl like that? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Yeah, so what is she, like a... like a spokesmodel, or an aerobicsinstructor, what? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Actually she's a paleontology doctoral candidate, specializing in thecentazoic era. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Okay, but that's, like, the easiest era. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 I've seen her at work, but I always figured, ah-huh? But, uh, I made herdinner. We had a great time. And we're going out again tomorrow. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Well maybe she and her friends are just having a contest to see who canbring home the biggest geek. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Fine by me; hope she wins. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Hi. You guys have any wrapping paper? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Oo! Is it for my birthday present? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Phebes, it was your birthday, like, months ago. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah, but remember you said you ordered something special, and it justhasn't come yet? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Well, I have a call in about that. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 'Kay. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Actually, this is for Kathy's birthday. It's an early edition of herfavorite book. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Oh, The Velveteen Rabbit! Oh my God, when the boy's love makes therabbit real! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Okay, but don't touch it, because you fingers have destructive oils. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Huh. Well, then you'd better keep it away from Ross's hair. So thisis pretty rare. How did you get that? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh, it wasn't a big deal. I just went to a couple of bookstores, talkedto a couple of dealers... called a couple of the author's grandchildren. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Oh, honey, that's so sweet. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah, and what a great way to say, "I secretly love you, roommate'sgirlfriend!" 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 It doesn't say that. Does it? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 How do you think it's gonna look when you get her something incrediblymeaningful and expensive and her boyfriend Joey gives her an orange? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Okay, all right, I'll just uh, make sure that uh, Joey gets her somethingreally great. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 It's gotta be better than that book. Oo! Like a crossbow! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	  Yeah, once again, I amsorry. Thank you. Bye.  I just had to turn down a job catering a funeral forsixty people. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Oh my God! What happened? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Sixty guests. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 So, uh, why did you have to turn it down? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Because I don't have the money or the equipment to handle something thatbig on such short notice. I mean there's no way. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Wow, what is with all the negativity? You sound like Monican't , notMonican...  ...Monica. Look, you know, you have been playingaround with this catering thing for over three years. Do you want to be a caterer or not? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 I don't know. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 There you go, that's the spirit! Okay! Now, if you need money, I will lendyou money, but just get moving! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Really? Cause I'd need like $500 for all the food and the supplies andstuff. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Okay! It's worth it, if it will get you moving. You haven't worked inmonths. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Well, you're not working either. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yes, but I'm doing this. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Yeah, that'd be great! Thank you! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Hey! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Everyone	 Hey. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Can I borrow the keys to your apartment? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Why? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 You can pee here! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Ahahaha... haha.. yes I can, of course. Excuse me. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 It's okay, the duck's using our bathroom anyway.  Hey Joe! What are you getting Kathy for her birthday? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 We've only been going out for a couple of weeks, do you think I gotta get hersomething? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Everyone	 Yeah! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Yes, you have to get her something, and it should be something really nice.
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Oh, I know... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 And not one of your coupons for an hour of "Joey Love." 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Ooo, a crossword! Can I help? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 No! I'm sorry, honey, it's just that last week I got all but three answersand I really want to finish a whole one without any help. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Fine. But you can't help me develop my new universal language. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Hey! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Hey, how'd it go? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh my God, it was the best funeral ever! I mean, everyone loved the food,and guess what? I even got another funeral for tomorrowthe dead-guy-from-today'sbest friend. I mean, it is like I am the official caterer for that accident! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Mon! I'm so happy for you! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Thanks. Like, check out my new catering stuff.  Look at this! I'm an omelet station! Omelet? Made to order! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 I'll have one, please. Plus my money. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh. Well, I didn't realize that you needed it back right away. I mean, youtold me to go and be a caterer. So I went. I beed. I mean, I... I used it to buy all thisstuff. But lookI've got another job tomorrow, so I'll pay you back with the money Imake from that. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Oh. Okay. Oo, sorry I acted like a bank. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Okay. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	  Huh... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 Um, would you like to come in? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Did homo-erectus hunt with wooden tools? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 According to recent findings! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	  Here Mitzi! Here Mitzi! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Mitzi is..... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 My hamster. I hope she's okay, I haven't seen her in a while. Have a seat. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	  Uh... Oh hey, do you, uh  ...do you have any, um, Cinnamon Fruit Toasties? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 What? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Well, I do! Why don't we go back to my place, light a couple of candles,break open a box of Cinnamon Fruit Toasties, uh... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 I'd rather not. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Oh, yeah, why not? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 Okay, um, don't take this the wrong way, but your place kinda has a weirdsmell. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh, is everything in the car? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yes. Did you settle the bill? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 No. I hate this part. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Oh, look what we almost left.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 No, that's not mine. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Oh, all right. Oh! Look what we almost took! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Excuse me, Mrs. Burkart? Well, we're all cleaned up in the kitchen. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	 Oh, good. Thank you. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Um, and, well there's the.. the the small matter of... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	 Dear? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Just the matter of ...payment? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  Jack used to handle the finances!  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 You know what we should all do? Go see a musical. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	  Sure... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 And you know which one we should see? The 1996 Tony award winner. Do youhappen to know the name of that one? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 I don't know... um, Grease? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 No.... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Rent? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Yes! Rent! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Okay, so when do you want to go? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 What? Oh, I'm sorry, I can't, I'm busy. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	  Hey. Man, it is so hard to shop for girls. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Yes, it is, at Office Max. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 What did you get her?  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 A pen.
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 It's two gifts in one. It's a pen that's also a clock! Huh? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Huh-huh! You can't give her that. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Why not? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Because she's not eleven! And it's not the seventh night of Hanukkah! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Okay, honey, what he means by that, is ...while this is a very nice gift,maybe it's just not something a boyfriend gives? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Sure it is! She needs a pen for work, she's writing, she turns it over...."Whoa! It's time for my date with Joey!" 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 All right, look, look. What did... what did you get for Angela Delvecciofor her birthday? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 She didn't have a birthday while we were going out. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 For three years? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	  Look, it's too late, and I got anaudition. I can't shop anymore! I... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 All right. I will go out and I will try to find something for her, okay? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Thanks, man. And oh, while you're at it, could you get her a card? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Would you like me to write her a little poem as well? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Or... just get a card that has a poem already in it. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 But Mon, you have to get our money! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh, Phoebe, she couldn't stop crying! With those thick glasses, her tearslooked giant. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 I know, it's tough. You know what the first thing I did after my mother'sfuneral was? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 What? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Pay the caterer! Look, I've had a lot of jobs, okay, and there are somepeople who just always try to get out of paying. It's either, you know, "that massagewasn't long enough, or, "I don't recognize any of those songs," or, you know,"these sombreros aren't big enough. Bad little white girl!" 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Okay. So what do you.... you think she's faking? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Well, it seems like there weren't any tears 'til you showed her the bill. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Phoebe, she sounded pretty upset to me. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  You're a grand ol' flag, you're a high-flying flag, andforever in peace may you wave.... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 She seems fine now. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  ...emblem of the land I love. The home of.... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 So, you just left? Her place was really that bad? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 You know how you throw your jacket on a chair at the end of the day? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Yeah. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Well, like that, only instead of a chair, it's a pile of garbage. And insteadof a jacket, it's a pile of garbage. And instead of the end of the day, it's the end oftime, and garbage is all that has survived!  Here. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Wow. Thanks. So, uh, what happened? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 What do you mean? Nothing happened! I had to get out of there. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 All right, so... next time, you take her to your place. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 No, I tried that. She says it has a weird smell. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 What kind of smell? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 I don't know. Soap? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 All right, listen, Ross... you like this girl, right? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 You wanna see her again, right? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 So you're gonna have to do it in the mess! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Yeah, okay you're right. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Yeah. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 I mean, uh, who... who cares about a little sloppiness? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Yeah! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 It's, uh... it's endearing, really. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 All right! Now you go get that beautiful pig! Oink! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Okay, all right. I just spent the entire afternoon looking for a presentfor Kathy that would be better than the rabbit. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Any luck? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh, yeah. Yeah, I found this great place called "Invisible thingsfor Kathy."  Can you give me ahand with all this stuff? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 All right, look. Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her theclock pen, and you give her something worse than that. Like... a regular pen. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 She's really going to love this, you know? The bottom line is I want herto have it, even if I don't get to be the one who gives it to her. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Aw, honey, that's so sweet. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Yeah? You don't think it's just pathetic? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Oh! Pathetic!  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	  Hey! I'm meeting Kathy in ten minutes! I've been looking all overfor you! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Where? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Our place, the hall! I... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 I got something for her.  It's a book! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	  A book?  Is it like a book that's also asafe? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 No, it's a book that's just a book, okay? It's an early edition of the VelveteenRabbit. It was her favorite book as a kid. So, uh, just... let me know if she likesit, okay? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 You got it. Thanks man. Thanks for doing this, I owe you one.  Oh, hey! There wasn't any change from that twenty, was there? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 No, it came out to an even twenty. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Wow. That's almost as much as a new book. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  Jeepers, creepers, where'd you get those peepers? Jeepers,creepers, where'd you get those eyes? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 You didn't get the money, did you? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Maybe I can try at intermission? Phoebe, come on... you know what? Let'sjust go! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 No! Hey, we're not leaving until we get paid! I don't know who she thinksshe is! Enough is enough!  Hey, widow? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  Come on along and listen to... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Okay, Widow! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	  ...the lullabye of... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Excuse me. Excuse me!  Thanks. Um, clearly thisis a very, very hard time for you. Um, but, um, we provided a service, and we deserve tobe paid because you ate that service, and, um, we are not leaving here until we're paidevery penny. 'Cause you know what, lady? We're part time caterers, and we have no placeelse to go. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Mrs. Burkart	 All right. I'll get my bag. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Good.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 I'm gonna leave some cards here. Please think of us for you next event. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 So you want to come inside? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	  Yes. Yes I do.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 I'll be right back. Make yourself comfortable.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	  Guess who? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Department of Sanitation? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 It's me! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Oh!  Ah.  Aw!  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 What? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	  Ah, Cheryl! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 Oh, Ross! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 Wait! No! No! It's my hamster! It's Mitzi! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Ross	 Oh my god! I'm so sorry, Cheryl. I must have freaked out. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	  Oh, thank god, it's not Mitzi. It's just a rat. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 I did it! Oh! I finished it! I did it all by myself! And there's nobody tohug! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Gunther	 Move! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Hey! Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! Hug me! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Uh... yay! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Thanks! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh, that's great! Congratulations! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Rachel	 Thank you! Hey, how'd the catering go? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Oh, it was great! The widow wouldn't pay, so Phoebe yelled at her 'til shedid. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah. I'm a hard ass. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 And I'm a wuss. And we should be partners. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah. Hard Ass and Wuss. We could fight crime! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Wait a minute, Phoebe! We should be partners. We should becatering partners. I mean, think about it! You're not working right now, and we have sucha great time together! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Okay! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 I can cook and you can take care of the money. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Phoebe	 Yeah. Oh! It'll be like I have a wife in the fifties! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Both	  Aah! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Hey! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Hey, how'd it go? How'd she like the gift? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Oh, man, she loved it! She's over there showing Monica and Rachel right now. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh yeah? That's great! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Hey, listen, I gotta tell ya, I feel kinda bad taking credit for this,because man, am I gonna get a lot of credit for this! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	  Aahhuuhhh.... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Hey. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Hey! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Hey! Happy birthday. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Thank you! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 You know, uh...  Chandler gotyou a gift, too. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 No he didn't.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Yeah, he did, look... look, it's right there on the counter! Ha-ho-ho! 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Happy birthday! I'm sorry. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 You really didn't have to.  Wow. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 See, you think it's just a pen, but then you turn it over and it's also aclock. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Yeah. No, this is great. Thank you, Chandler. . 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh, yeah... yeah. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Ah. Hm.  Wanna go to bed? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 I'll be in in a minute. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	 Oh, uh... don't forget your coupon. . 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	  Goodnight. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Um, thank you for the gift. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh, uh, yeah... I just knew that sometimes when you're writing, you...you don't always know the exact time. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 No, I... I didn't mean the pen. Thank you for the book. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Uh, the book? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 The Velveteen Rabbit. I kinda have the feeling you had something todo with it. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 What do you mean? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Well, uh, when Joey gave it to me, he said, "This is 'cause I know yalike Rabbits, and I know ya like cheese." Thanks. I love it. And I know how hard itmust have been for you to find. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	  Uhl..ell. By the way, in case you missed that, that soundwas, "Uhl, ell." 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 You must really like... Joey... to go to all that trouble for him. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, he's my... he's my best friend. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Kathy	 Well.... 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Chandler	 Goodnight.  
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Joey	  Hey, that coupon expires, you know. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Hi. Uh, you... you don't know me, I'm Monica Geller... Ross's sister. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Cheryl	 Oh, yeah. Oh, you know, that's too bad that didn't work out. 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 Yeah. Anyway, he told me about your apartment. And, um, I couldn't sleep,thinking about it. So, uh, would it be okay if I cleaned it? 
04	06	0406	The One With The Dirty Girl	Monica	 No? 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  I just walked in the bathroom and saw Kathynaked! It was like torture!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Y'know if we ever go to war and youre captured, youre in for abig surprise.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 It just keeps getting worse and worse! Y'know? I mean its badenough that Im in love with my roommates girlfriendwhich by the way, I thinkshe knows. Because every time were in the room together theres this weird likeenergy between us. And call me crazy, but I think she likes me too. And now I have seenher naked. I mean at least when Ive seen her with clothes on, I could imagine herbody was like covered in boles or something. But there are no boles, shes smooth!Smooth! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Wow! Could everyone totally see up his robe?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	All	 Yeah! Oh my God!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Casey	 Here you go.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Great! All right, so Ill call you later.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Casey	 Great! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  Hey-Hey-Hey! Who was that?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 That would be Casey. Were going out tonight.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Goin out, huh? Wow! Wow!  Sothings didnt work out with Kathy, huh? Bummer.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 No, things are fine with Kathy. Im having a late dinner with hertonight, right after my early dinner with Casey.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah-yeah. And the craziest thing is that I just ate a whole pizza bymyself! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Wait! Youre going out with Kathy!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah. Why are you getting so upset?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Well, Im upsetfor you. I mean, having sex with an endlessline of beautiful women must be very unfulfilling for you. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 What is the big deal? Its not like were exclusive.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Look, Joey, Kathy is clearly not fulfilling your emotional needs. ButCasey, I mean granted I only saw the back of her head, but I got this sense thatshes-shes smart, and funny, and gets you.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 You got all that from the back of her head?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 All right look, I think its time for you to settle down. Y'know?Make a choice, pick a lane.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Whos Elaine?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	  "Little, tiny Tarzan, swinging on a nose hair.Swinging with the greatest of ease" Darn it! Now, I dont know who toget to the next verse.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Oh, you could just go uh, "greatest of ease  BAH-bah-bha-bhannn." Then go right into it.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Yeah, ooh, I like that! Yeah. Wait! How do you know aboutbah-bah-bha-bhan?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Well umm, yknow, I used to play.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, thats right, the keyboards, huh?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Yeah, just a little in high school, but then I really got into it incollege. I mean thats-thats when I really found my sound.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Oh God! Orange juice just came out of my nose, but it was totally worthit. Oh my God, I completely forgot about your sound.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Yeah.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 He used to lock himself in the basement for hours. No one was everyallowed to hear, "The Sound."
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 I wanna hear "The Sound."
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Really? No. I mean, nah, I havent played in so long, and-and, wellits-its really personal stuff, yknow?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Come on, play that funky music white boy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Yeah!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 No, you guys, I mean my keyboards are all the way up inNo, yeah,okay. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Okay, guys.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 All right! Bring it on, you
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Here we go.  Yknow, Ive-Ive never playedmy stuff for anyone before, so its important that-that you understand itsabout communicating very private emotions.  Yknow, umm, youshould-you should think of umm, my work as wordless sound poems. Thats whatIm
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  Oh my God! Play!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	  Boy, that was-that was, umm terrific.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Really, bitchin!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Wow, it was sowow!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Really?! I mean, really?!!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Yeah, I mean, you should play in public!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Wow! Thanks, you guys. Thats uhohhh, I wanna, I wanna play youanother piece! Umm! Uh-oh! I left my uh, helicopter sounds on another disk. Ill beright back! Okay?  This is so nice, ImI am so
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Oh God bless my dad sound proofing the basement!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Oh, I cant believe I ever let him touch me with those fingers.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 What are you guys talking about, I loved it! It was soo moving. Oh, plusits just, its so different from the stuff you usually hear.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 You mean like, music?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah, I know what youre thinkin! Yes, yes, your breastsare just as firm and juicy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Come in!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	  Hey!  Oh God, is that Baywatch?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Uh yes, but uh, I just watch it for the articles.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 So is Joey around?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 No-no, hes not back yet, but hell be here any minute. Souh, come on in. Have a seat. Bow or stern?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 I uh, dont really have a preference. You?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I like it in the stern.  of theboat.   Hello.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	  Hey, its me. Listen Casey and Iwere on our way back and had a little car trouble.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 What happened?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 We broke down on the Parkway, so I have to walk back and get sometransmission fluid. And hey, listen could you please tell Kathy that Ill be there assoon as I can.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Why cant you tell her?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Cause I only have one quarter, and I think my time is aboutto
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Joey! Joey!!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I thought your time ran out.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Me too, but I guess I do have a couple of more
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  Uhh, that was Joey. Hes running a little late, hesays hes sorry.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Oh.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 So I guess its just uh, you and me then.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Oh, okay.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah, I think it is!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 So what did you do today?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh, I had an appointment to get my haircut
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	  Oh, it looks great!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 and then it got canceled.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Well, I could cut it.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Really?! You do that?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Yeah, I do. Of course, I learned at my aunts dog grooming shop, buthey, what do you say?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Dog grooming huh? Okay, just dont make my tail too poofy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 You have really great hair.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Well, thanks. I grow it myself.  Yknow who also hasgreat hair is Joey!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Yes! Yeah! Joey has great hair! Umm, Im basically done here. Justlet me get this off your neck.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 What-what cha doin?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Checking to see if its even.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Kay.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Looks good.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  Oh the phone! The phones makingsounds!  Hello!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	  Hey dude, its me.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Hey its Joey!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Listen uh, Im really sorry, it looks like Im gonna be stuckhere for a while. I got the transmission fluid, but when I went to put it in the car, thetransmission wasnt there!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah, it mustve fallen out a few blocks back. I just figured we hita dog.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Okay.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Listen uh, could you put Kathy on, I wanna apologize.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh yeah man.  Joey. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	  Hey.  Oh no its fine, dont worry aboutit.  Yeah-no, stop apologizing, its okay.  Yeah! Ill talk toyou tomorrow.   I should uh, probably go.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah. Yes! Yeah. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 I forgot my purse.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 No, I really did forget my purse.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, this is bad! Its bad! This is bad!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Horrible!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Wait the uh, the kiss or the situation?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 No-no-no, the kiss was good.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Okay!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 No, but thats bad!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Ooh! Yes! Okay! Heres what we do, we-we forget it happened.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 What?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Okay, we-we swallow our feelings. Even if it means were unhappyforever. Sound good?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Can you really do that?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I have to; hes my best friend, and youre seeing him.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Chandler, I like Joey a lot, but with you
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	  Oh-no-no-no! Dont! Dont! See-see,youre getting me confused, Im starting to urn. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Im sorry. If you wanna pretend that nothing happened, I can try.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I-I think we have too.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	 Okay. Bye.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Bye.  Are you still out there?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Kathy	  No. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	  Electrifying.  Emphatic time-time-time
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	  Y'know, theres a Starbucks aboutthree blocks down.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	  Its so inspired! Look at him!Look at him go!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	  Thank you guys-guys-guys
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	  Hey, arent you up next?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Oh no, Im not playing tonight.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Why not?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 I cant follow Ross! Itd be like those bicycle ridding chimpsthat followed The Beetles. No.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Phoebe, Ross sucks! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Phoebe, the place has emptied because of him.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Oh my God, hes not even appreciated in his own time. I would giveanything to not be appreciated in my own time!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Okay. Umm, Phoebe, you suck too.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Yeah, Phoebe youre awful!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 You guys. You suck too. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Aww man! I cant believe I locked myself out again! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Hang on buddy! 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	  Oh my God! What happened here? Did you do all this?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I sure did.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Why?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Well, I just thought itd make me feel good to do something nicefor my friend.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Well, youre amazing.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no. This is amazing. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	  A TV as if it appears from nowhere! Thats the dream!Man, how did you afford this stuff?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Well, yknow Im 29. I mean who needs a savings account.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Oh, you are the best friends anyone has ever had.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh, I dont know.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Oh-no-no-no, you are! You do this, you give me the great advice, and heylisten, I was thinking about what you said yesterday about focusing on one woman, Imgonna do that.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 You mean with Casey.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 No-no-no, I think Im gonna see how things go with Kathy. Shespretty cool.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Or Casey.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 No-no, Kathy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Could be Casey.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 No. No, Kathy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Consider Casey.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yknow what I think? I think somebodys got a little crush onCasey. How bout I fix you two up? What do you think?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 That all the pieces of my life are falling right into place!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	  Hey!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Hey! You were really great! You were really, really great!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Oh, thanks, thanks. So Monica tells me that uh, you dont want toplay anymore because me and y'know my talent. Is that true?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Well, kinda. Yeah. Yeah.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Pheebs
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Yeah, I-I cantI mean yknow I was trying to be reallyy'know okay and upbeat about it, I justI feel so dwarfed by your musical gift.I
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 See but, Pheebs that-that is the exact opposite intent of my music.Yknow my music is-is meant to inspire, and if it bothers you this much, then II wont play anymore.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Oh no. No-no-no, dont do that! How could I live with myself if Iknew I was depriving the world of your music.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Yeah, okay.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Hey Chandler! Saw the new furniture. Very nice.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Yeah! Joey has the best boyfriend ever!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 I kissed Kathy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Are you serious?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Does Joey know?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 No. Is there anyway, anyway you think hellunderstand this?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 You obviously havent screwed over a lot of your friends.  Which we all appreciate.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 No the-the sad thing is, if you had told him how you felt before youkissed her, knowing Joey, he probably just wouldve just stepped aside.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh, dont say that! Dont say that. Thats not true. Isit?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 I think maybe, yeah.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 He loves you.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Then why didnt you tell me to do that?!!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Well, I said-I said something to Phoebe.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Yeah! No, thats right. And I thought it was a really good idea.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 I know, I remember that!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 I remember you did.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 God!!  What am I gonna do?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Well, Chandler, youre gonna have to tell him.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Why?! Why do I have to tell him?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Because you do.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah, I know.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Hey, would it be okay if I wrote a song about this.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Hey!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Hey! Samboucha Margarita? 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Is that a real thing?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Well, we only had samboucha, so it is now.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Listen ah, Joe, I-I need to, I need to talk to you about something.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Whats up?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Its-its about Kathy. Umm, uh, I like her. I like her a lotactually.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 You do?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Well, youre timing couldnt be better. Shes not mygirlfriend anymore.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah, she broke up with me.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh uh, when?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Just now, after acting class. At first I thought she was doing some kindof scene, thats why I let people watch.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Oh man, I am so sorry. Are, are you okay?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Well, Ive been better. But, Im all right. So you like her huh?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yes, but I-I uh, dont have too.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 No-no-no, no its uh, its okay.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Yeah. You know why? Cause you came to me first.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Well, I thought that would be the best thing to do.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 But hey, listen just so you know, you might have youre work cut outfor you. Cause when I talked to her, I kinda got the feeling that shes intosome other guy. So
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 See uh, thats-thats actually what I wanted to talk to youabout. I-I think I know who the other guy is.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Who?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Its me. Im the other guy.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got totalking, and one thing to another and
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 And what?! Did you sleep with her?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 No! No! No! I just kissed her.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 What?!! Thats even worse!!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 How is that worse?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 I dont know! But its the same!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Look, Im sorry! But theres nothing I can do, I thinkIm in love with her!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Who cares?! You went behind my back! I would never do that to you!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line, thatyou-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Yes. Yes! Right! And I feel horrible. You have to believe me!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Is that why you bought all this stuff?!  Well, yknow what I will not watch your TV, I will notlisten to your stereo, and theres a cinnamon raisin loaf in the new bread maker thatIm not gonna eat! You know why?!
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Chandler	 Probably because
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Joey	 Because its all tainted with your betrayal. From now on thisapartment is empty for me! And Im not happy about you either.  Oh, and just so you know, I made that bread for you. 
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 Oh my God, hes lost it. Hes totally lost it.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	  What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 Phoebe, his music could not get any worse. There arerats in the basement that are hanging themselves.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Thank you, thanks.  Yeah, I lost it.Yknow, Im not gonna play anymore,  would you, can you finish myset?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Phoebe	 After that? Yeah! No, I mean if I can help.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Yeah, like I could lose it.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Rachel	 What?
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 I played bad on purpose guys.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Monica	 Okay, so you were trying to play bad this whole time.
04	07	0407	The One Where Chandler Crosses The Line	Ross	 Yeahno, just that last song.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Hello.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	  Hey, its me. I know you cant stand to be in thesame room as me, so I just thought Id try and apologize over the phone. All I
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Hello.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Look I never should have kissed your girlfriend, but Im
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Stop callin!!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Voice	  Hey! Hey! Hey! This is 92.3, WXRK, K-Rock for our $1,000 dailychallenge.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 All right!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Voice	 What is the name of your roommate who is very, very sorry and would doanything 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	  Aww, turkey! Aww, giving thanks! Aww!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Look everyone, its the spirit of Thanksgiving!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 So are things with you and Joey any better?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 They couldnt be worse. I spent eight hours calling him lastnight, just trying to get him to talk to me.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Oh wow, eight hours? So you could probably really use one of thoseplug-in telephone headsets huh?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Should we all expect Christmas gifts that can be stolenfrom your office?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 You shouldnt.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Speaking of Christmas, umm since Monica and I are starting a newbusiness and have like no money, umm, this year maybe we could do secret Santa, and thenwe each only buy one gift. And-and theres the added mystery of who gets who.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Who gets whom.  I dont know why I do that.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Well, Im gonna take a nap, turkey makes me sleepy.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 We havent eaten yet!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 I know, but all that work youre doing to get it ready, Ijust 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey, by any chance did either of pick uh Rachel for your secret Santa,cause I wanna trade for her.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 I picked her! Oh thank God you want her! Ooh!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Wow! Why do you want to get rid of her so badly?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Because she exchanges every gift she ever gets, its likeimpossible to get her something she likes. Come on, lets trade!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Oh thats not true! Thats not true! I got her that backpackand she loved it! I remember how much she was crying the day when that big dog ran offwith it  Oh, there was no bigdog. All right this sucks! I already got her this briefcase, and I had R.G. put onit  Her initials
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Ohh.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Well, maybe you could give to somebody else. Ooh, like Ross Geller.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Op, y'know what though, its kindve a girlie briefcase.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Who cares? He works in a museum!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey, what time is it? The big game is about to start!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 You dont have to do that, Ross and Joey arent here, you canwatch the parade if you want.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Thanks.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 What is wrong with this freezer?!  Ow! Ow!!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 God, what happened?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh my God, ice just got in my eye!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	  People are trying to sleep in here!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Monica got ice in her eye, and it hurts.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Open it up, let me see.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh, yknow what, I cant, it really kills.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Well maybe you should put some ice on it.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Ooh, God it looks bad.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Honey, maybe we should take you to a doctor.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 No, my eye doctor is Richard! I cant go to him when I donthave a boyfriend!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hes really picky about his patients.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Honey, youve got to go. Whats his office number?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Like I remember his office number!  Speed dial 7.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	  Hi! Yeah, Im calling on behalf of Monica Gellerseye, and is um, is Richard Burke in today.   Hes out of town,but does she want to see the on-call doctor?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Yes!!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Yes! Shes very excited about that.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 This is so cool, til Monica gets back, its like Imhead chef and I get to make all the decisions. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Hey-hey, I thought she told you to follow the recipe exactly!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Okay, get out of my kitchen!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	  All right! Okay! I think I am making some progress withJoey, when I went into the apartment he went straight into his bedroom but he only slammedthe door once!  I mean yeah, he gave me the finger while doing it.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 All right I I gotta call my mom and ask her a left handed cookingquestion.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 So listen ah, I picked Monica for secret Santa, but Im alreadygetting her something for Chanukah, I was wondering if you wanna switch.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Oh yknow what, I was already trying to trade for ah, well, you.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Really?! Wow! Thats-thats so nice, what are you gonna get me?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 I dont know R.G., I was thinking something girlie for youroffice.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Yeah, well maybe Phoebe will switch with me.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, you dont want to do that, then youre gonnaget stuck with Rachel and she exchanges every gift she ever gets.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Oh, thats not true! Ive got her lots of stuff she never tookback.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Like?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Like uh, that gold necklace I got her last year.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 When was the last time you saw her wear it?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Well, she wore it all Christmas day, and then uh
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Big dog?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	  Hey!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hey!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 What are you doing?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Im sending back all this stuff that Chandler bought out of guilt.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Everything? Even the TV?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 No! Im putting that in my room.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Listen, Joey, I know what he did was wrong but dont you think youcould at least hear the guy out?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Back when you and Rachel were together, if Chandler had kissed her, wouldyou hear him out?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Thats a good point. So uh, how long are you gonna punish him?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Five years. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Youve sentenced him?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hey! Dont do the crime if you cant do the time.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Joey, the guys your best friend.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 No, was my best friend. Anyway, I dont know whyyoure pushing for him so hard. With him out of the way as my best friend,theres a spot open.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Oh, who? Me?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Wow! Im honored! And yknow what Im gonna do as my firstact as your best friend?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 What?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Im gonna get you to talk to Chandler.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 All right. But if you werent my best friend.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Oh my God, is it really that bad?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 I walk into a room and he wont even talk to me, he just mumblessomething in Italian. And I know he only knows the bad words.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Hey Gunther, have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Gunther	 I thought you were Chandler. But umm, one of who is overthere.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Oh.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey Joe.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Doctor	 Ill be right with you. Okay?  Thanks, Wendy.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh my God! How cute is the on-call doctor?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Ooh, so cute, that Im thinking about jamming this pen in my eye.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Nurse	 Dr. Burke will see you know.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh no-no-no, not Dr. Burke. Dr. Burke is out of town. The-the on-calldoctor will see me now.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Nurse	 Dr. Richard Burke is out of town. Dr. Timothy Burke, his son, will seeyou now.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Dr. Timothy Burke	 Ready?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey! Im sorry! Thatwhere are you going?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 My folks.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Oh, uh, when-when are you coming back?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 I dont know. I might stay there for a few days while I look for anapartment.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 What?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah, yknow at first I thought we could talk about this yknow,work it out, but uh, seeing you two together I dont think I
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey, look, what do you want me to say? Do you want me to say thatIll stop seeing her?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Look, its not about her. Okay? But seeing you two together justreminds me of what you did. And I dont want to live with some one who doesntknow what it is to be a friend. So, Ill see ya. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Hey, look, I know what it is to be a friend, I just-I just screwed up!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah! You did! And thats why Im leaving.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 All right look, if youre not gonna stay for me, then at leaststay for them! Okay, they have had a very difficult year! What with therobbery and all!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 When that guy was robbing us, and I was locked in the entertainment unitfor like six hours, you know what I was doing in there all that time? I was thinking abouthow I let you down! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 What?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah! But if wouldve know what kind of friend you were gonna turnout to be, I wouldnt have worried about it so much! See you around!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 All right, wait! Come on! Just wait one second! There has to besomething that I can do! Something! If we still had that entertainment unit I would get init for six hours and think about how I let you down.  What?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Weve got a box. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Last time I saw you, it was the morning I left for college. And you werejust standing outside The Dairy Queen.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 I was probably waiting for it to open.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 I gotta tell you, you look great now.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 You look great too.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Youre an excellent patient!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 So how does it look?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Well, youve got a little scratch on your cornea, your gonna have towear a patch for a couple of days.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Like a pirate?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 If that helps you. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Umm, so how long have you been working with your dad? Come on, one of us had to mention him.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 I moved back here a couple of months ago.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh. Big family dinner tonight?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Uh. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 No way!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 I was gonna have Thanksgiving at my girlfriends.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Oh.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 But we broke up.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Oh. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 She-she wasnt ready for a serious commitment.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Oh.  So you made her walk theplank? Aye, matie?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Youre not wearing the patch yet.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 I know.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Hes coming here for Thanksgiving!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 I know, its sick.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Why is it sick?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Because its Richards son! Its like inviting Greektragedy over for dinner!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Hey, come on, Phoebe, you understand dont you?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Yeah, I can see where Id be your best shot but, no. Imsorry, but I think its twisted.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Yeah.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Whats twisted?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Me going out with Richards son.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Ewwwww!! Ew! Ew! Ew!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	  Sounds like a really badidea to me.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Is he okay in there?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hes fine!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Hey, y'know, Mon, if things wrong out between you and Richards son,youd be able to tell your kids, that you slept with their grandfather.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Fine! Judge all you want to but,  married a lesbian, left a man at the altar,  fell in love with a gay icedancer,  threw a girls wooden leg in a fire, livin in a box!! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 So now, what exactly is the point of the box?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Chandler?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 The meaning of the box is three fold. One , it gives me the time to think about what I did. Two , it proves how much I care about my friendship with Joey. And three , it hurts!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	  Oh hey! Hey uh, you remember the necklace I gave you lastyear? Can I see it?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	  Why?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 I just wanna check something.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Okay. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	   Now, wellsee.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Air hole! Air hole!! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	  Here it is! I love it. Iwear it all the time.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	  The necklace I got you was gold, this one issilver.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Huh, well maybe it uh, it changed. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Oh my God! You actually exchanged it!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Well isnt it better that I exchanged it for something that I enjoyand that I can get a lot of use out of?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 What did you get?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Credit. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Ill get it! Ill get it!Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it!Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it! Ill get it!Ill get it! Ill get it!  Hi, Tim.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Hi. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Thank you. Come meet my friends. This is uh, Phoebe. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Hi, nice to meet you.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 And Joey.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hey!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Hi, Joey.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 My brother, Ross.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Hey.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 And Rachel.  And thats Chandler.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 How do ya do.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Whats
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Umm, well, hes
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hes doin some thinkin!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 What happened? What happened?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 You kissed my girlfriend!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Ooh, I like those sunglasses.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Like em, like em? Or, Id like to get store credit forthat amount like em?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 All right everybody, this turkey is ready!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Where can I wash up?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Here, let me show you. Okay, the towels are hanging next to the sink,and umm, you can use the fancy soap.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Thank you.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Fancy soap? I thought we were savin that for the Pope!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 See hes nice. Right?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Yeah, but Monica, do you actually want to be in a relationship where youcan actually use the phrase, "Thats not how your dad used to do it."
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Wow! Everything looks great! Where should I sit?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 I saved you a seat. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	  Sick-sick-sick-sick.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Oh, Ill get it. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Gotcha! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 That doesnt sound like thinking to me!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Sorry!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yknow I dont think you should be talking at all in there! Ithink youve got to much thinking to do to be talking and making jokes!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Okay, okay, you got it!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Ross, can you pass me the yams?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Sure! Oh, and Joeys got the mashed potatoes if you want to exchangethem.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Would you stop?! What is the matter with you?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh-ho-ho, weve got company.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Theres nothing the matter with me. See, Im not completelydevoid of sentiment, see I have feelings.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Okay, fine. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 You cant tell, but Im trying to break the tension bymooning you guys!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 All right, look! If this is just a big joke to you, then forget about it,all right?! This means something to me! And if it doesnt mean anything to you, thenyou should get out of there, otherwise youre just an idiot in a box!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Youre right, and Im sorry! This means a lot to me! I wantyou to be my friend again! I swear, I wont say another word tonight.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 So are you gonna start taking this thing seriously?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Absolutely!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 That sounds like another word to me! Are you gonna take this seriously? Okay.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Dont say that I have no sentiment!  This is a movie stub from our first date! This is an eggshellfrom the first time you made me breakfast in bed!  This is from themuseum from the first time we were together. Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes,but I keep the things that matter! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 I dont know what to say, Im sorry. Though, youre notsupposed to take these.  Its like a million years old, we, weactually, we had people looking for that.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Ooh, this always happens. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Here, let me help. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Thank you.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 You-you have a very beautiful eye.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Yknow all my friends think this is weird. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Yknow I-I thought it was gonna be weird, I mean I almost called andcanceled, but it really isnt.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 I know! I mean its like me and your dad, thats a totallyseparate thing.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Oh, I totally agree.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Were just two people who find each other very attractive. Right?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 What?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Nothing. Nothing.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 No-no really, was-was that not okay?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 No-no-no that was good, it was, that was uh, that was a goood kiss
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Oh my God! It didnt remind you of
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	  Dont say it!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 No, but it did! Didnt it?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Yeah!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Tim	 Oh man!!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 I know!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Ill get it. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	  Oh.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Hey.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Hey. Listen, I want you to know how sorry I am
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Thats okay. Chandlers the one Im mad at.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Well, Im still sorry. Is he here?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 In the box.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	  Chandler?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Oh, he-he cant talk right now.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Why not? Whats going on?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Hes just trying to show Joey how much he means to him.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 By being in a box?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Joey, had reasons. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 They were threefold.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Kathy	 Oh. Well uh,  you not being able to talk may makethis easier. Listen umm  Listen I dont wanna be someone who comes between two bestfriends. I just, I cant stand seeing what this is doing to you guys, and Idont wanna be the cause of that. So, I dont think we can see each otheranymore. Im gonna go to my moms in Chicago, Im gonna stay there forawhile. I think this couldve be something really amazing, but yknow this isprobably for the best. Yknow? Im gonna miss you. Good-bye, Chandler. 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	  Open the box!! 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 What?!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 He can still catch her! Come on, get out of there!  Getout of there!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 So?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah, were gonna be fine! Get out!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Yeah?
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Yeah, you did some real good thinkin in there.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Chandler	 Man, this is 
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Now go! Cause you can still catch her! And Merry Christmas fromyoure secret Santa!  
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 All right, who got Chandler? Cause I uh, need to trade.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Rachel	 Oh, he sees her!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Monica	 Oh, hes catching up to her!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Oh, she sees him! Oh, theyre hugging!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Ross	 Hes taking her purse!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Joey	 Uhh, thats not them. Im gonna go call the police.
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 Oh, there they are!
04	08	0408	The One With Chandler In A Box	Phoebe	 All right, get a room.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Okay!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Come on, no peeking! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Our eyes are closed and were about to cross the street. Verygood.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Okayyyyy, open up! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 What did you want to show us? Because all I can see is this bitchin'van!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, its for our catering business!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 I think I know that girl.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right, umm, were not gonna really keep it this way though.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 No?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 No, were gonna paint over the sword, and replace it with abaguette. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 And also, we dont know what to do with this. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Oh yeah, I definitely know her.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	  Remember that guy from cooking school I told you about thatput cilantro with everything?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Oh sure, Cilantro Larry.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Well, Im gonna fill in for him as food critic for the ChelseaReporter.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Wow, Monica! What an amazing opportunity to influence dozens ofpeople.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 How could you say yes, what about our catering business?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh no-no-no, its only one night a week, and plus I get to take allof you out for a lot of free dinners.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	All	 Yay!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Oh, in that caseYay!  That was me hopping on board.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	  Hey, you guys! Hey, Ross, quick question for ya. Are youready to party?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 I dont know, I could maybe go out for a couple of beers, buttheres this thing about bumblebees on The Discovery Channel that I wasplanning to watch.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 No-no, I dont think you heard me. Are you ready to party?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Nooo!! Gandolf?! Gandolf is coming to town?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Kathys with her parents, I have nothing to do, so tomorrow weare partying with Gandolf dude!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Dude, we are sooo gonna party!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Wow! Okay, dude alert! And who is this guy?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Mike "Gandolf" Ganderson, only like the funest guy in the world.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Im gonna call and get off work tomorrow!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Im gonna call after you!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 This is gonna be soo cool, dude, we never party anymore!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler, Ross	 Woooo!!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right, were you guys smoking something in the back of our van?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Really. And what do you mean you never have fun anymore? You have fun withme, remember that time we saw those strippers and you paid me 50 bucks to eat that book?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Joey, you are gonna love this guy. Gandolf is like the party wizard!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Well, why do you call him Gandolf?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Gandolf the wizard.  Hello! Didnt you read Lordof the Rings in high school?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 No, I had sex in high school.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something.Theres an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	  Okay, but that would actually be a big step down for me.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Well, actually, I meant for me. The hiring committee is meeting peopleall day and
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Oh. Well, I wish I could say no, but you cant stay my assistantforever. Neither can you Sophie, but for different reasons.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 God, I am so glad you dont have a problem with this, because ifyou did, I wouldnt even consider applying.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Really? Well, in that case
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	  And thats Im so glad theres noproblem.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Thats fine, actually Im on the hiring committee, sotherell be at least one friendly face.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Ohh! Thats great!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 You know, Junior Miss is where I started. Oh, I had to sleep with the ugliestguy to get that job.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Really?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 No-ho-ho!  Yeah.  I mean, no-no-no-no-no, dont youworry, Im sure with your qualifications you wont need to sleep with some guyto get that job. Although, I might need some convincing.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Well, I, umm
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Kidding! God, I feel wild today!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Oh man! I am so excitedI may vomit!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Will you calm down, hes just a human guy.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Look you dont understand, Gandolf is amazing. Yknowyoure never know whats gonna end up happening, you go out for a couple ofbeers and end up on a fishing boat to Nova Scotia! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Really?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Oh yeah, its beautiful country up there.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	  Hey! Okay! I got my passport, fresh socks, and a snake bitekit!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Its not gonna be exactly like last time.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 All right, Ill see you guys.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler, Ross	 Whoa-whoa-whoa!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Whoa-wh-wh-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 I have an audition, but Ill definitely hook up with you later. Whereare you gonna be around noon?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Somewhere maybe along the equator?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Okay. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	  Hello.   Its Gandolf!!!  So, are you in town?   Oh, well, well maybe next time then.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 What happened?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Hes not gonna make it, hes stuck in Chicago.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Ohh, man! Chicago, is sooo lucky!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Stupid, useless Canadian money!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mr. Posner	 You have a very impressive resume, Ms. Green. I especially like whatI see here about implementing a new filing system.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Thank you.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Filing system? Oh-oh! You mean those-those little colored labels you puton all the folders?  It certainly did brighten up the inside of thefiling cabinets. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Well, they uh, they-they do more than that.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 I notice that youve been trusted with a lot of ratherimportant responsibilities.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Yes, Joanna really has been an incredible mentor to me.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Oh. And Rachel has been really incredible in getting my morning bagelfor me. Its amazing how she gets it right almost every time!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 I-I-I of course, I have more responsibilities than that.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Oh yes, well theres the coffee too.  Rachel cancarry two things at once!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mr. Posner	 Yes, thats very good. Now a uh, big part of this job iscultivating personal relationships, especially with designers.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Yes, I realize that
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	  And Rachel shouldnt have any problem with that. Theonly problem might be getting a little too friendly, if you know what I mean.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 I love working with designers!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 With them, under them, whats the difference? Eh, Rach?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Hey! My first review is out!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Ohh! Oh, the Chelsea Reporter, ohh, this used to keep me so warm.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right, look at my on the back page.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Oh, okay!  "Would I go back to Allesandros? Sure,but Id have to order two meals, one for me and one for the guy pointing the gun tomy head."  Wow! You really laid into this place.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Hey, they dont pay me a penny a word to make friends.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Ooh, I gotta go. I found a guy that who could fix up the van forcatering.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh! Do you need me to go with you?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 No-no, its okay. But are we sure we dont want the waterbed?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Havent we made this decision?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, all right. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Bye!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Bye!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	  Who is it?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Its Allesandro, from Allesandros.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh my God.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 I want to talk to you about your review.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh my God, oh my God.  Call me on the phone!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Why? So you could hang up on me?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Look, I-Im never gonna let you up so you may as well just go away.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Just give me a chance too
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	  Hey, do you need to get in? Here you go.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 No! Phoebe!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Hey, Monica!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	  I want a retraction! Our food is notinedible swill!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 I couldnt eat it! I had five friends who couldnt eat it, andone of them eats books.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Well our service is not grossly incompetent.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 The waiter carried the breadsticks in his pants!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Well, you said that we except the Discover Card, which wedo not!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right, that Ill retract. But I stand by my review, I know foodand that wasnt it. Youre marinara sauce tasted like tomato juice! You shouldserve it with vodka and a piece of celery. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Hey! Im proud of that sauce, its delicious.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Oh my God! You own an Italian restaurant and you think that tastesgood?! Where are you even from?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	  Lebanon.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Hand me those tomatoes, Im gonna show you what it should tastelike! Come on, hand me them.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 How long is this gonna take? Cause I got another critic to goyell at.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	  Umm, Joanna? I wanna talk about thatinterview.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 I thought it went very well.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 No! It didnt! Thats what I want to talk to you about. Now, just to brief you  I may cry, but they arenot tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Rachel, please, dont make a scene.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Theres nobody here!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Sophie, get in here!  You see! Now youre makingSophie uncomfortable!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Sophie	 Shes not making me uncomfortable.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Congratulations! You now just crossed the line into completely useless.Get out. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Do you want me to quit?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 What?! What would make you think that?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if youbelieve any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. Yknow what? Iam just gonna pack up my desk,  and I will be gone by the end of the day!  Well, I guess theres no use to me sticking around til theend of the day! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Wait-wait-wait-wait! You can put your sad little muffin back inits drawer. If you must know the truth, I didnt want to lose a perfectly goodassistant.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 What?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Thats why I said all those things about your flirting and yourdrinking
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 My drinking? 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Oh, I mustve said that after you left.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Said what? Exactly.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 That you enjoyed the occasional drinking binge.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh my God!! Ohh, that is it! Im leaving! You are just a horribleperson!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait-wait!! If youre gonna get allsensitive about it! I dont want to lose you. What if I, create a position for you?Ill make you an assistant buyer in this department.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Say more things like that.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 You can have your own office, and a raise! Effective tomorrow.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Id need an expense account.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Done!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 And an assistant.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joanna	 Sophie, get in here! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Hey! What are you guys doing here? I thought youd be out partyingwith Gandel-worf.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Its Gandolf, and hes not coming.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 So youve been sittin around here all mornin?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 No! I balanced my checkbook. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Yeah, and I-I gave first names to all of the foosball players.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 I cant believe he didnt come!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 So what if he didnt come! We can still go out and party ourselves!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Oh-no, yknow with Gandolf wed be out allnight!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Yeah! Wed meet, wed meet total strangers, and hang out withthem!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Well, we could do that! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Theres other stuff too.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Well do it all, and better! Look, after tonight, Gandolf will wantto party with us, dude! Come on!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Yeah!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Yeah!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah!! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Its not like we dont know how to party!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah! All right? Lets go!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 And may-maybe we could end up on a boat again?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey, Ross	 Yeah!!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 All right!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	  Hey-hey-hey, when uh, when were we on a boat?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Remember that really cold morning, you woke up and those dogs werelicking your face?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Yeah.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Well, those were seals, man.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Hey Mon, little question for ya! How do you think this suit will look onan assistant buyer?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Okay, the owner of Allesandros came over to yell at me, butinstead I made him some sauce, and he offered me the job as head chef!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh my God!! You just ruined the thing I was practicing the whole wayhome, but Im soo happy!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Can you believe it? I finally get to run my own kitchen!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Ohh, youve waited soo long. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	  Hey!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Hey, Pheebs, quick question for ya.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Yeah.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdales?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 I dont know, it would totally depend on her coloring and You got the job!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Yes!!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 You got the job?! Why didnt you tell me?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Ohh, its gonna be so great! Im gonna get to help decide whatwe sell, Im gonna have an office with walls and everything. Im gonna have walls!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Okay, is this the day of good news or what? I got us a job! The weddingreception.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Ohh! Umm, Phoebe, I kinda need to talk to you about that.  Umm, well I-I-I think it might be time for me to take a step back fromcatering.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 But weve only had one job.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 I know, but now we have this second one and it just, it feels likeits snowballing, yknow?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Yeah! What are you saying?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 I got offered the head chef job at Allesandros.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 What?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Its okay, cause y'know what? You dont really need mefor the business.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Youre the cook! With out you its just me driving up topeoples houses with empty trays and asking for money!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right. But umm, I-I-Ill pay you back all the money youinvested, and you can keep the van.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 For what? I cant believe this! I gotta get out of here.  
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Phoebe, wait a minute! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Im an assistant buyer!!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 All right, so well get a little coffee, and get energized, andwell head back out.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Yeah, all right.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Okay.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 So, were having fun, right?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler, Ross	 Yeah.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 We dont need that wizard guy. We hit a couple of clubs, talked tosome strangers, and uh, after this, well head down to the docks and see about thatboat thing.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Im kinda beat.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Actually, me too.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Are you serious?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler, Ross	 Yeah.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Thank God! Im exhausted!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Gunther	 So you guys want coffees?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah, but uh, I dont want to be up too late, so uh, Ill have adecaf. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Yeah, me too.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Actually, can I get some hot water with a little lemon? I think Istrained my voice screaming in there. Does it have to be so loud?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 I cant hear a word youre saying, my ears are ringing so bad.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 Im just glad I brought that extra pair of socks, yknow? I usedthem as mittens, I didnt want to touch a thing in that last place.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 How sad are we?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah, I know.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler	 Yknow what? Were not sad, were not sad, werejust not 21 anymore. Yknow? Im 29 years old, damnit! And I want to sit in acomfortable chair, and watch television and go to bed at a reasonable hour!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey, Ross	 Yeah!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Yeah! And I like to hang out in a quiet place where I can talk to myfriends.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Chandler, Ross	 Yeah!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Ross	 And so what if I like to go home, throw on some Kenny G, and take a bath!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Joey	 Were 29, were not women.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	  Ohh, here you are. Yknow, Im-Im glad youdecided to hear me out.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Okay, Im hearing.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Ive been doing a lot of thinking. A lot! And umm, well, I came upwith a whole bunch of businesses you can do with your van. Okay umm, you could be flowerdelivery person.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 What?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Or! A bakery delivery person.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 I wa-I wa-I wa
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Pizza?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Monica! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 All right, Ive got a whole bunch of uh-uh, stuff in this area, butumm, Im getting the feeling that you dont want to deliver.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 No.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Okay. Im guessing that if you dont want to deliver, youprobably dont want to pick stuff up either.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 No.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Yknow what, lets do the catering business.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Really?! Are you sure?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Yeah, y'know I-I made a commitment to you. Yknow what, itdbe, itd be fun.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Oh! It will be fun! Ohh! Yay! Oh! Okay, ooh, letsplan the wedding reception. Wow! You really wanted me to do something with this van. Yknow what, I want you to take the chef job.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Really?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Yeah. Thats what you really want. Yeah, I dont want to bethe reason youre unhappy, that would just make me unhappy, and I reallydont want to be the reason Im unhappy.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	 Thank you.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Phoebe	 Besides, it might be kinda fun to form the new A-Team.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! Is Joanna in already?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 Oh my goodness! You havent heard!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Heard what?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 Joanna passed away last night.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh my God! How?!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 Well, she was leaving work and she was hit by a cab.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh, I cannot believe it!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 I know!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh, God. Oh, God.  Oh God.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 I didnt realize that she was so close.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Yes, so close. Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is anemotional and difficult time, for all of us. But by any chance did Joanna send anypaperwork your way before it happened.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	 No. Nothing. Imagine, if she had just stepped off that curb a fewseconds later.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Yes-yes, just a few seconds and shed still be with usnothingabout an assistant buyer?
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Mrs. Lynch	  No, Im sorry. I have to go. 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Sophie	  Good morning!
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Rachel	 Oh, Sophie, I guess you didnt hear about Joanna
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Sophie	 I sure did! 
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Allesandro	 Im so excited about having Monica come on board with us.Although I do feel bad about having fired chef Emillio, its like losing a member ofthe family. Of course, that literally is the case for several of you.Tony, Carlos, Marie, please, tell your father how much were gonna miss him. Now, Iknow that Monica has a lot of great ideas for this place, well, you all read the review.So without much further ado, I present to you our new head chef.
04	09	0409	The One Where They're Going To Party	Monica	  Umm, I just wanna say, uh  that with apinch of exictement, a dash of hard work, a dollup of cooperation, we can have therecipe...  Are you gonna kill me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Hey! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler, Joey, Phoebe	 Hey!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Im sorry Im late, did I miss anything?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Joey stuffing 15 Oreos in his mouth. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 15?  Your personal best! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Where were you?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Oh, on a date. Yeah, I met this girl on the train going to a museumupstate.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh, yeah! How did you meet her?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Oh, which museum?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	  No, answer his.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Okay, it was just me and her at the back of the train, and I sat near thedoor, so shed have to pass by me if she wanted to switch cars. She was totally at mymercy.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Were you so late because you were burring this woman?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 No, Im getting back down cause she lives in Poughkeepsie. Sheseems really great, but shes like totally great, but she lives two and a half hoursaway.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 How can she be great if shes from Poughkeepsie?  That joke wouldve killed in Albany.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Done! I did it! Heh, whos stupid now? 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Hey, look at this!  Theyre lighting the bigChristmas tree tonight.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Umm, that papers two weeks old. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 All right, who keeps leaving old newspapers in the trash?! I reallywanted to take Kathy to this, I cant believe I missed it.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Hey, yknow, at least you have somebody to miss that stuff with! I hatebeing alone this time of year! Next thing you know itll be Valentines Day,then my birthday, then bang!before you know it, theyre lighting that damn treeagain. Ohh, I want somebody! Yknow, I want a man!!  I mean, itdoesnt even have to be a big relationship, yknow, just like a fling would begreat.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Really?! I didnt think girls ever just wanted a fling.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Well, believe me, its been a long time since Ive been flung.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Well, I know what Im giving you for Christmas.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Yknow what? Theres some nice guys at my office, do youwant me to set you up?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Yeah! Wait a minute, its been a long time that Ive beensingle. How come you never offered this before?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Well, I have a girlfriend, Im-Im happy. So, I no longerfeel the need to go out of my way to stop others from being happy.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Okay! No accountants. Oh, and no one from like legal. I dont likeguys with boring jobs.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh and Ross was like what? A lion tamer?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	All	 Hey!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Whats wrong Mon?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Ohh, everybody at the restaurant still hates me.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Oh.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 I thought I was making headway, everyone was smiling at me all day, Iget off work and I find out that they wrote this  on my chefshat. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Hey, maybe they meant to write, Quiet, bitch.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Hey, honey! Whats the matter?  Fine, Iwas just trying to be nice! Whoa!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 I mean I have not been picked on this much since kindergarten and theyhad to bring in someone from junior high to do the see-saw with me. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Ohhh!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 I mean theyre trying to do everything they can to make me quit,and if there were any other job, I would. But this is something Ive been waiting formy whole life.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Well, wait a minute, youre the boss! Why dont you just yellat them? Or, fire them?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 I would love too, but I cant! I mean I just cant, you knowthat Im not good at confrontation.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Hey, you know what you can do? I remember reading about this director,I think it was Orson Wells, who at the beginning of the movie would hire somebody, just sohe could fire them in front of everybody. Then they would all know, whos boss.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Hey, Mon! Im not doing anything, why dont you fire me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Thats a good idea! Wait, do you know how to waiter?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Good enough to get fired.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 All right, youre hired!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Hey! That must be why I got fired last week! Does this Orson Wells guydirect Burger King commercials?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Yes.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 I say, Drew! Are you seeing anybody right now? Og-ee-op, Im not asking for me, Im I mean No, Im-Imnot gay, Im not asking you out. Im not-Im not-Im not gay!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Drew	 I didnt think you were gay. I do now.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 See my friend-my friend, Rachel, she wants to be set up.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Drew	 Ahh, I just got out of a big relationship, Im not looking for anything serious.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh, yknow what, that might be okay even if it was just kind of afling, that might be all right with Rachel.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Mike	 Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Is this, hot Rachel, that you took to the Christmasparty, Rachel?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Oh, by the way, that is her full name.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Mike	 Oh wow! Im free for her!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Drew	 Oh, wait a second! I didnt say I wasnt free!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Mike	 Hey, Chandler, why dont we talk this over at the Ranger gametomorrow?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Drew	 Hold on, yknow I just got a box of Cubans, maybe Ibring them by your office around uh, five?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh well, thats uh, a little later than I uh, generally care tostay, but sure!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Mike	 Maybe, before the game we could enjoy some eight year old some small batchBasel Hadens.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Well, I dont really know what that is, but lets!!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Hey! You guys, Im writing a holiday song for everyone. Do you wantto hear it?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica, Rachel, Joey	 Yes!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	  Happy Chanukah, Monica! May your Christmas be snowy, Joey!Happy New Year, Chandler and Ross. Spin the draddle, Rachel!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Pheebs, thats great!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Oh, yay!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 But yknow umm, Rachel doesnt rhyme with draddle.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 I know but its so hard! Nothing rhymes with your stupid name!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 What are you talking about? Lots of things rhyme with Rachel. Bagel. Mail.Jail. Bail. Able. May-pole.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 All good, thanks.  Do you maybe have a nickname have like anickname thats easier to rhyme?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Didnt your dad used to call you Pumpkin?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Oh yeah!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Pumpkin? Yeah. But did he ever call you like, Budolph?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Hello, children!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	All	 Hey!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Have I got the 50 guys for you!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Really?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh yeah, I just showed this a picture of you and guys were throwingthemselves at me! Theyre buying me drinks! Theyre giving me stuff! Knicks tonight?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Sure! Where are the seats?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Wherever! Ive got like 20!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 So, will I like any of these guys?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Yknow what, Im gonna uh, play the field just a littlemore.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Chandler!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Guys are signing over their 401-Ks to me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	  You work with robots!!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Yes.  Okay, theres this one guy, Patrick, Ithink youre gonna like him, hes really nice, hes funny, hes aswimmer.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Ohh, I like swimmers bodies!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Yes, and his father invented that magnetic strip on the back of creditcards.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Op, I like credit cards!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 See, Im not bad at this fixing up thing, huh?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Well, so what does he do?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh, he works in the Fine Foods division.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Your company has a fine foods division?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Its a big company, I dontif youI
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Now, wait a second! You make food and robots?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 No! No, the robots just work for them.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	  All right, Im gonna go to work. Does anybody have aproblem with that?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Yeah, lady, I do! I got a problem with that!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 You want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Oh, what are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 You bet your ass, Im gonna fire you! Thank you. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Oh, wow! I should get going. I-I got a date tonight.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh yeah! With who?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 You know that girl I told you about who lives up in Poughkeepsie?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Yeah.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Not her. Yeah, this is someone else I meet, and I-I cant decidebetween the two of them. Yknow the one from Poughkeepsie, even though shes atwo hour train ride away, is really pretty, really smart, and-and a lot of fun. But thisother girl, well, she lives right uptown. Yknow shes, wellshes-shes just as pretty, I guess shes smart, shes notfun.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 If shes no fun, why do you want to date her at all?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Well, I-I want to give her another chance, yknow? She lives soclose. And, at the end of the date, the other time, she-she said something thatwasif she was kidding was very funny. On the other hand, if she wasnt kidding,shes not fun, shes stupid, and kind of a racist.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Hey!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Hey!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Hey, man!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Hey! Ooh, how was your first day working at the restaurant?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Damn! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Hey.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Hey.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Hey, what happened to your fancy chefs jacket? 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 They baked it. I cant take this anymore. Im gonna call ameeting tonight, Im gonna fire you tonight.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 You got it! Oh-oh! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 What are you doing?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Its still a tiny bit on fire there.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Thanks.  I think you got it!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	  Chandler!! You have the best taste in men!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Well, like father, like son.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Patrick and I had such a great time last night! I mean I think thiscould maybe turn into something serious.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Really?! I-I thought you werent looking for something serious? Ithought you were looking for some kind of a fling.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Well, y'know, possibly.  You didnt tell him that, though?Right?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Ummmmmmmm, no.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! You dont tellthe guy that!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Why not?! Id be thrilled if I heard that some hot girl was justlooking to getoh I see.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me puttingout on the first dateoh, hes so gonna get the wrong idea.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Hey, Joey, could you pass the cheese?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Yeah. Listen uh, Id prefer it if you didnt call me Joey. SinceI dont know anyone here, I thought itd be cool to try out a cool worknickname.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	A Waiter	  Hey, dragon! Heres your tips from Monday and Tuesday.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Theres like-theres like 300 bucks inthis one!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Yeah, people get pretty generous around the holidays. And it neverhurts to wear tight trousers.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Okay. Could the waiters gather around to hear tonights specials?Okay, first there is a Chilean Sea Bass prepared with a Mango relish on a bagWhy isnobody writing these down?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Because we can remember them.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Because your all gonna make up fake specials and make me cook them likeyou did the other night?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Well, sure, that too.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Okay, forget the specials for a minute. Umm, all right heres thething, for the last two weeks I have umm,  tried really hard to create a positiveatmosphere
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Cant hear you!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	  A positive atmosphere! But I-I-I have had it up to here.  From now on, it is gonna be myway, or the highway! All right? Does anybody have a problem with that?!!  Hey new guy! I said, does anybodyhave a problem with that?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 No maam.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Hey! He has a name, its Dragon. Do you wanna know your name?Check your hat.  We did the hat right? 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 What the hell happened?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 I am so-so-so sorry. I was gonna do it! Really! But I was standing therewith 327 dollars in one hand and 238 dollars in the other hand, and I was thinking,"Wow! Its been a long time since I had  327 + 238 dollars!"
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Joey, we had a deal. That-thats why youre here! Ivegot to fire you!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 And I gotta pay rent! Look, how-how about this? You dont fire me,instead I stay here, I gain their trust, and theyll start listening to all the nicethings Ive been saying about you.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 What kinda things have you been saying?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Well nothing yet, they really hate you and I want to fit in.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	  Happy, happy Chanukah, Chandler and Monica. Very merry
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	  Oh, yknow, yknow what Pheebs?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 What?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Im not Jewish, so
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 So! Ross doesnt really decorate his tree withfloss, but you dont hear him complaining do you? God! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Bad dream?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 I wasnt sleeping.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh yeah, then uh, what was Phoebes song about?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 The one with the cat. I gotta go, Ive got another date.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 So, did you pick one yet?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 No, it turns out that the one from uptown was making a joke. But it was adifferent joke than I thoughtit wasnt that funny. So Im still torn.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Well look, you dont really like the one from uptown andyoure too exhausted from dating the one up in Poughkeepsie, so I say you just endthem both. Okay? You take a train up to Poughkeepsie and break up with her, and on yourway back you break up with uptown. And then by the time you get home tonight, youredone!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Yknow, youre right. Thank you.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Umm, well I had a similar problem when I lived in Prague.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Prague?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	 Theres sooo much you dont know.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Chandler! Patrick just uh, ended things with me. Did you or did you nottell him that I was looking for a serious relationship?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 I did! I absolutely did!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 You idiot!!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Im sure youre right, but why?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 You dont tell a guy that youre looking for a seriousrelationship! You dont tell the guy that! Now you scared him away!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh, man. Im sorry, Im so-so sorry.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Yknow, you should never be allowed to talk topeople!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 I know! I know!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Oh! See just Im right back where I started! Aww, this sucks! Beingalone, sucks! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Well, yknow, youre-youre gonna meet somebody!Youre a great catch! Yknow when I was telling all those guys about you, Ididnt have to lie once. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Really?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Yeah! You graduated Magma Ku Laude, right?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 No.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Oh, it doesnt matter.  Hey,yknow what, Ive got two tickets to tonights Rangers game, you wanna comewith me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Cute guys in little shorts? Sure.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Well, actually its a hockey team, so its angry Canadianswith no teeth.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 Well that sounds fun too. 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 Have you ever been with a woman?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Rachel	 What?! Chandler, what is the matter with you?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Chandler	 So there is no good time to ask that question.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Conductor	 The next station is Poughkeepsie. Poughkeepsie!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Woman From Poughkeepsie	  Ross? Ross! Wake up! Ross!  Ross! Ross!! Ross!!!Ross!!!!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 I need more swordfish.  Can you get mesome more swordfish?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Kitchen Worker	 I dont speak English.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 You did a minute ago!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Kitchen Worker	 Well, I dont know what to tell ya!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Fine!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Okay! Very funny! Somebody let me out please?! Come on, Im cold! And covered in marinara sauce! Come on! Let me out! 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 You found that handle, did ya?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Thats not funny.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 Well thats not true.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	  Im a good person. And Im a good chef, andI dont deserve to have marinara sauce all over me! Yknow what, if you want meto quit this bad, then all you have to do is
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Hey! Chef Geller! Yknow that little speech you madethe other day? Well I got a problem with it!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 You do?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 You bet I do! I just ah, wasnt listening then, thats all.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Well if you want a problem? Ill give you a problem!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 What are you gonna do? Youre gonna fire me?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 You bet your ass Im gonna fire you! Get out of my kitchen! Getout!!  All right! Anybody else got a problem? How bout you Chuckles?You think this is funny now?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 No.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 How about if I dance around all covered in sauce? Huh?You think its funny now? 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Waiter	 No, its really good.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Good! Now, take those salads to table 4,  And you! Get the swordfish!  And you! Get a haircut!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	The Conductor	 Last stop, Montreal. This stop is Montreal.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	  What? 
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Woman On Train	 I made a bet with myself that you have beautiful eyes. Now thatI see them, I win.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 What?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Woman On Train	 Were at my stop. But would you like to have coffee?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	  Are we really in Montreal?!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Woman On Train	 Yes we are. So, coffee?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Ross	 Coffee sounds great.  Wait, so, so you live in Montreal?
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Woman On Train	 Oh, no. But its just a two hour ferry ride to Nova Scotia.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Well I guess I shouldve thought about my wife and kids before Italked back to chef Geller!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Thanks.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	 Yep! Looks like its gonna be a leeeeean Christmas at the Dragonhouse this year.
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Monica	 Enough!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Joey	  Lean-lean-lean!
04	10	0410	The One With The Girl From Poughkeepsie	Phoebe	  "Went to the store, sat on Santa's lap.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I cant believe my little brother is married!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Oh I know!! 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 You guys, why didnt you tell me you were eloping?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Cause it just sorta happened, yknow we were at thecourthouse, we were having lunch
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Wait, wait, why were you at the courthouse? 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 We were having lunch. Yeah and then all of the sudden we were like,"Hey! Y'know, were here, having lunch lets get married!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Wow, a year and a half ago I didnt even know I had a brother, andnow I have a sister too.  Okay. Okay.Stop it, dont. So, I gotta get you a gift now. Is there anything you need?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Uhh, yeah.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	 Weve been trying to get pregnant, uh pretty much ever since we gotengaged, we thought wed get a jump on things, yknow no ones getting anyyounger.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 See the thing is umm, were not able to yknow, uh, conceive.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	 And weve tried everything, weve seen a bunch of doctors.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Yeah, and they-and they say that our-that our only chance to have a babyis that if they take my sperm, her egg and put it together in a dish and then put it intoanother girl. So we were wondering if you could be the girl that we could put it into.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	  Thats a really nice gift. I was thinking of like a gravyboat.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	  Hey! You guys! Check it out, check it out!  Guess which job I got.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 I dont know, but Donald Trump wants his blue blazer black.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 What?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Blue blazer back. He-he wants it back.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 But you-you said black. Why would he want his blue blazer black?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Well, you-you know what I meant.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 No, you messed it up. Youre stupid.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 So what job did you get Joe?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Oh, ah, tour guide at the museum. Yeah, Ross got it for me.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Well, how can you be a tour guide, dont you have to be a dinosaurexpert or something?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 No, not really. They give you all the information, its uh, itslike memorizing a script.  "And on your left, you haveTyrannosaurus Rex, a carnivore from the Jurassic period.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler, Monica, Rachel	  Great!! Thats great!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Uh actually Joey, its the Cretasous period.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Yeah but, I can pronounce Jurassic.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	  Hey!!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	All	 Hey!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Guess what. Frank Jr., and Alice got married!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	All	 Oh my God!!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 And! And, theyre gonna have a baby!  And!And, they want me to grow it for them in my uterus. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 My God!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Are you serious?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Yeah
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Youre really thinking about having sex with your brother?!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Ewww! And "Oh no!" Itsthey just want me to be thesurrogate. Its her-its her egg and her sperm, and Im-Im just theoven, its totally their bun. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Huh.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 What did you tell them?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Well, they said that I had to think about it first, but what is there tothink about? Im gonna be giving them the greatest gift you can possibly give.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Youre gonna be carrying their baby and give them a Sony PlayStation?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Honey, this really is an incredible thing to do for them, but there arethings to think about.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Yeah, like youre gonna be pregnant. I mean pregnant.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 I know!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Pheebs, youre talking about putting your body through an awful lot,I mean morning sickness, uhh, labour, and its all for somebody else!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Yeah, whats your point?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Well, the stuff I just mentioned.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Wow! I dont know if I could ever do that. I always figured thefirst time I had a baby was with somebody I love and that baby would be akeeper.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Y'know you guys were a lot more supportive when I wanted to make denimfurniture.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 No, Pheebs, listen, if you decide to do this, well be supportivelike crazy.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	All	 Yeah.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 We just want you to think it through.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yeah, honey, maybe you can talk to somebody whos had a baby. Likeyour mom?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 My mom never gave birth. Oh! But my birth mom did.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Kathy	 Umm,  I love this touchy. Can Itake it to work with me?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, sure, its not mine anyway. It can with the pants.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Kathy	 Oh! 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 I am so jealous.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 You guys are really rightthere arent you?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Yes. Right where?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 In the beginning where yknow its all sex and talking and sexand talking and
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Yeah, you-you gotta love the talking.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 And the sex?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 All right, we havent had sex yet. Okay, whats the bigdeal? Yknow? This is special, and I want our love to grow until we move on to thenext level.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Oh, Chandler that is so nice.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 That is really nicelying! No way is that the reason!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Why? Just because youre not mature enough to understand somethinglike that?!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 No, hes right, Im totally lying.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Then what is it?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Well, Kathys last boyfriend was Joey.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 And youre afraid you wont be able tofill his shoes.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 No, Im afraid I wont be able to make love as well as him.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Yeah, I was going for the metaphor.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Yes, and I was saying the actual words.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 So big deal, so Joeys had a lot of girlfriends, it doesntmean hes great in bed.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 We share a wall! So either hes great in bed, or she just likesto agree with him a lot.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Sweetie, with you its gonna be different. The sex is gonna begreat, cause you-you guys are in love.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Yeah?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yeah!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Just go for it Chandler.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Yeah, you should.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yeah, you should, really.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Go on.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 All right, all right, Ill go sleep with my girlfriend. ButIm just doing it for you guys.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Okay, now the Mastodon is from the semi-late Jurassic period.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Smart Kid	 Isnt the Mastodon from the Pliocene Epic?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Shhh! This is a museum, no talking. Right down here,  we have a large foot.  Uhh, and over here we have Ross Geller.  Everyone waveHi to Ross. Ross is one of our most important scientists, look at him, hard atwork.  Okay, moving right along. Come on.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Its open! Come in!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Hi!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Hi!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Im sorry, Im late.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Oh, thats okay, it gave me time to finish glazing my nipples.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Wow! You really go all out when youre expecting company.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 No, I was working on my pottery.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh! Ooh! Oh, I didnt know that you didpot.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Well, yeah, mostly nudes. It combines my two passions, pottery anderotica.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Ooh, erotiery!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Hey! Okay! Well thanks for coming out to see me. I just-I justthought it would be a very good idea to talk about this baby stuff in person.Yknow
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 I really dont think its a very good idea, Phoebe.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Why not?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Well, because youd be giving up a baby, and I-I reallydontI dont know if theres anything I can say that could make youunderstand the pain of giving up a baby. So, umm, 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh no! No-no! I understand the pain! Dont-dont hurt thepuppy.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 No-no-no, the-the puppys yours.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh, I get a puppy!!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Well, yeah! I mean yeah, but only for three days.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Why?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 I realise I dont have any right to start get all parenty on youand everything now, but umm,  uhh Phoebe, would you please look at me and not the puppy,its very important. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 I mean, I know what Im talking about. I gave up two babies, andI only wish I had someone there that had given up babies, that could tell me how terribleit is to give up babies. I just think that, it would be something you will regret everysingle day for the rest of your life. So, how ever hard it is to give up this puppy, itwould be like a million times harder to give up a child.  I really shouldnt have given you the puppy first.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 All right, Im sorry.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Uhh, do you mind sitting there. Im-Im saving this for myfriend Ross.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 You mean Dr. Geller?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Doctor? Wow! I didnt know he had a nickname.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 Oh, he wont sit here. Only the people in the white coats sitover there,  and only the people in the blue blazers sit here.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Well, how-how come?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 Thats just the way it is.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Thats crazy.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 Maybe its crazy in a perfect world, a world without lab coatsand blazers, but you not in a perfect world, you in a museum now. See that scientist inthe classes, he and I used to play together all the time in grade school, butnow Peter! Hey, Peter! Its me Rhonda! From PS-129! I shared mypuddin which you man! I gave you my Snack Pack!  See, he pretendhe dont even here me!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 I-I think everybodys pretending they dont hear you. Anyway,look, I dont know about you and your jackets and your separate tables, but Ross isone of my best friends, and if I save him a seat, Im telling you, he will sitin it!  Ross! Ross! Over here, man! I-Isaved you seat.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Thats okay, Im cool over here. Ill catch up with youlater, Joey. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 Op, this is saved.  Gift shop.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	  Hey, uh, Im really, really sorry about what happened inthe cafeteria today.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Its no big deal. Hey, yknow, you do what you gotta do. Right?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 But hey, its not just me, I mean the scientists and the tour guides neversit together.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Whatever.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Its like that everywhere, Joey! Okay, Mon, back me up here. Whereyou work the uh, waiters eat with the waiters, right? And the chefs eat with the otherchefs, right?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 I eat by myself in the alley because everybody hates me.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Look, Ross, really its-its no big deal. Yknow you wear awhite coat, I wear a blue blazer, if that means we cant be friends at work, then sobe it. Yknow, hey I understand. Yknow? Hey, when Im in a play andyoure in the audience, I dont talk to you, right? So its yknow,its uh, its cool. Ill see you tomorrow. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yeah, when were in the audience he doesnt talk to us, but hedoes wave.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Hi.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Hey!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Why is Phoebe singing to Carl Mulden?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Ooh, yknow what, I think its time for puppy to go out again.Come on, lets go to the balcony.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 What?!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Umm, the street. Come on, lets go to the street. Ooh, listen,dont go onto the balcony until after I get back. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	  So, did you do it?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Yes, yes, we had the sex.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Uh-oh, it was bad?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 It was fine, yknow? But she didnt agree with me asstrongly as she agreed with Joey. She was more like, "I see you point, Im allright with it."
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Well, it was the first time. Yknow, theres not always a lotof agreement the first time.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yeah, not girls anyway, guys agree  like that.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Look, you have to help me! Okay? I mean, I know what to do with awoman, yknow, I know where everything goes, its always nice. But I need toknow what makes it go from nice to, "My God! Somebodys killing her inthere!"
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 All right, Im gonna show you something a lot of guys dontknow. Rach, give me that pad, please?  Allright. Now
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Look, you dont have to draw an actual wowhoa! Sheshot!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones.  You got one, two three, four , five, six, and seven!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	  There are seven?!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Let me see that.  Oh, yeah.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	  Thats one?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Its kind of an important one!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Oh, yknow-yknow what, I was looking at it upside down.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Well, yknow, sometimes that helps. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	  Now, most guys will hit uh, 1-2-3 and then go to 7 and setup camp.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 That-thats bad?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Well if you go to Disneyland, you dont spend the wholeday on the Materhorn.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Chandler	 Well you might if it were anything like 7!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 All right uh, the important thing is to take your time, you want to hitem all, and you mix em up. You gotta keep them on their toes.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Oo, toes!! Well, for some people. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3,5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4,  2, 2, 4-7, 5-7,6-7, 7, 7..77-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7! 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Older Scientist	 Dr. Geller, theres a seat over here. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Thank you, Dr. Phillips, but Im having my lunch at this table, herein the middle. Im having lunch right here, with my good friend Joey, if hellsit with me.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	  I will sit with you Dr. Geller. 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Y'know, we work in a museum of natural history, and yet there is somethingunnatural about the way we eat lunch. Now, I look around this cafeteria, and yknowwhat I see, I see-I see division. Division, between people in white coats and people inblue blazers, and I ask myself, "My God why?!" Now, I say we shed these-thesecoats that separate us, and we get to know the people underneath.  Im Ross! Im divorced, and I have a kid!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	  Im Joey! Im anactor! I dont know squat about dinosaurs!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Another Tour Guide	  Im Ted, and I justmoved here a month ago, and New York really scares me.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 All right, there you go!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Joey	 Yeah, you hang in there Teddy!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Older Scientist	 Im Andrew, and I didnt pay for this pear.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Okay, good-good for you.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Tour Guide	 Im Rhonda,  and these arentreal! 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Wow, Rhonda.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Another Scientist	 Im Scott.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Ross	 Yeah, okay, Scott!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Another Scientist	 And I need to flip the light switch on and off 17 timesbefore I leave a room or my family will die.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 My moms gonna be here any minute. I cant do this, Icant give him up. Yesno, I can. I dont want to. But I can. No.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Oo, I cant watch this, its like Sophies Choice.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Yknow, I never saw that.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Ooh, it was only okay.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Ooh, I cant do this. My mom was right. If I cant-if Icant give him up, then theres no way I can give up a baby. Ohh, God, Frank andAlice are gonna be so crushed. What-what else, what else can I give emakidney!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	  Hi!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Hi!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	 Uhh, we were just in the neighbourhood, so
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Yeah, so we just thought wed stop by and let you know theresstill no pressure.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	 None. But if there was something you wanted to tell us, were justgonna be right over there  having coffee.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	  Oh, whos this little guy?! 
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh! Ooh! Umm!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Oh, hes so cute, he reminds me of my old dog, Tumour.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	 You are so precious, I could just take you home.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Hey, why dont you?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Are you serious?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, yeah!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Oh, thanks.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 What are you doing?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 No, Im really okay with this. Yknow why? Cause look atthem, and I made that, so I know its gonna be like a million times harder togive up a baby but, oh my God, its gonna feel like a million times better, right? Iwanna do this.  I wanna carry your baby.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Alice	  Oh! Oh! Oh! Thank you so much! You dont know what thismeans to us! Oh!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Frank	 Oh my God, I think Im gonna cry!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Its gonna be so great.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	  Hi! Whats going on?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh, I-I gave them the puppy and it made them so happy that I decidedIm gonna carry their baby.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 But Phoebe
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 No-no-no, I know, but you and I are different people though, and this isa totally different situation, and I know that I am not gonna regret this.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe Sr	 Oh, I-I-I understand all that, but its justthat was mypuppy.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Phoebe	 Oh!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Would you ever be a surrogate for anyone?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 It depends on who asked.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 What if I asked?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Oh, Mon, sure.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 Really?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yes.  Youre not asking are you?
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Monica	 No.
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Rachel	 Yes! Totally!
04	11	0411	The One With Phoebe's Uterus	Kathy	 Oh! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Yes! Thank you! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 What the hell is that?!!  What the hell is that? Isthat you? Ohhhhhhh!  
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Boy, you are really not a morning person.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	  BACK OFF!!!  Get up! Getup! Get up! God damn it! Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 What is that noise?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 You!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Its the chick! Shesgoing through some changes.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 What kind of changes?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Well the vet seems to think thats shes becoming a rooster. Were getting a second opinion.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Hey, what are you doing shopping at eight in the morning?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Well, Ive been up since six. Thanks to somebodysdumb-ass rooster.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 You guys you really should get rid of those animals. They shouldntbe living in an apartment.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Yeah! Especially not with all of these knives and cookbooks around
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 All right. Im gonna go to the fertility doctor and um, see ifIm ready to have Frank and Alices embryo transferred into my uterus.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Now, how will they know if youre ready?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Oh, theyre just gonna umm, look to see if my endometria layer isthick.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Oh, I can uh, check that for ya.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Okay everyone, think thick.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	All	 Good-bye! Good luck! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Hi! Wish me luck!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Oh, good luck.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Good luck.  And Im still right!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 That is sooo not true!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 What?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Shes mad because I know todays her laundry day and that meansshes wearing her old lady underpants.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 I can check that for ya.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I justI cant believe that you think that you and Chandlerknow me and Rachel better than we know you.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Well we-we do. You can only eat Tic Tacks in evennumbers.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Yeah, whats that about?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	  And you Ross, I believe, if you check Rachelsbag you will find a half-eaten box of cookies in there.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	  Youre good. These are not.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Im so not impressed. Everybody snacks when they shop.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Yeah.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Oh yeah? Ross, how many items left in that bag?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Five.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Okay, ten bucks says that we can name every item in that bag.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 How many guesses do you get?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Six.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Challenge extended.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Deal!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Challenge excepted.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 All right, well start withapples.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Well be starting with apples.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	  Stop that now!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Yes!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Okay. Uhh, tortilla chips, yogurt.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Diet soda.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Yes. Yes. Yes. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Orange juice.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 No! Theres no orange juice in there! We win!! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Ha-ha!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 They have another guess.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Okay, well, we won that one.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Okay, the last thing
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Oh-oh, oh, oh-oh! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 No-no, not for like another two weeks.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 I got it! Scotch tape. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 How did you know she would buy scotch tape?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Well, we used theres up last night making scary faces.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Aww, man!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 All right! Ten buck! Fork it over! Cough it up! Pay the piper! Gimmeit.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 That does not mean you know us better, I-I want a rematch.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Yeah, and none of these stupid grocery questions, real personalquestions.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Yeah! And the winner gets a hundred bucks.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Serious?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Are you scared?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 No! All right, who-who makes up the questions?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Ross will do it.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Oh sure, "Ross will do it!" Its not like he has a job, ora child, or a life of his own.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Fine! Well ask Phoebe.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 No-no-no, I-I wanna play.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 It looks like your uterus is ready for implantation.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Oh! I knew it! I knew it! I felt really thick this morning.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 Well, okay, so whats nowgo get, go get the eggs, put emin there.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 Okay, itll take just a little while to prepare the embryos.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Embryossss? As in, "More than one?"
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 Um-hmm, five actually.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Five? Okay, where am I giving birth, a hospital or a big box under thestairs?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 We do five because that gives you a 25% chance that at least one willattach.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Thats it! 25 percent? That means thats its like 75percent chance of no baby at all!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 Hey, yknow I was thinking, what are the odds like if-if, if youstuff like 200 of them in there?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Alice	 Sweety, now, shes a woman, not a gumball machine.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Okay, well yknow what, dont worry you guys, causeIm-Im gonna do this as many times as it takes to get it right.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 Well, you see, the-the thing is, we-we only got, we kinda have one shotto make it right.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Alice	 Umm, it costs $16,000 each time you do this. So, umm, were kindausing all the money we have to do it just this one time.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Whoa!! Thatokay, thats a lot of pressure on me and myuterus.  So, well okay, so is thereis maybe is there something that Ican do yknow just to like help make sure I get pregnant?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 No, Im sorry.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Wow! You guys really dont know anything!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 I know! Why dont you get drunk! That worked for a lot of girls inmy high school.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 You guys! Do you realize that any minute now, Phoebe can be pregnant?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Huh.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 I know! I know, its such a huge, life-altering thing.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 I know.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 The test is ready.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	All	 Yeah! Yes! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Okay, each team will answer ten questions. The first team that answers themost questions wins. Okay, the categories are, Fears and Pet Peeves, Ancient History,Literature, and Its All Relative. Now, the coin toss to see who goes first.  Okay, somebody call it this time.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	All	 Oh yeah!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Tails!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Its heads.  Gentlemen, pick your category.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Fears and Pet Peeves.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 What is Monicas biggest pet peeve?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Animals dressed as humans.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Thats correct. Ladies?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Same category?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 According to Chandler, what phenomenon scares the bejeezus out of him?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Michael Flatley, Lord of the Dance!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 That is correct.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	  The Irish gig guy?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 His legs flail about as if independent of his body!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Gentlemen, youre pick.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Its All Relative.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Monica and I have a grandmother who died, you both went to her funeral,name that grandmother!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	  Nana?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 She has a real name.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	  Althea!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Althea?! What are you doing?! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 I took a shot.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 You're shooting with Althea?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Althea is correct.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Nice shooting!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Well take Literature!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Every week, the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joeys apartment. Whatname appears on the address label?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Chandler gets it! Its Chandler Bing!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 No!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Im afraid the TV Guide comes to Chinandolor Bong.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I knew that! Rachel! Use youre head!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Actually, its Miss Chinandolor Bong.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Hello, tiny embryos. Well, Im-Im Phoebe Buffay, hi!Im-Im-Im hoping to be your uterus for the next nine months. You shouldknow, that were doing this for Frank and Alice, who you know, youve beenthere! Umm, yknow they want you so much, so when you guys get in there, really grabon. Okay, and-and I promise that Ill keep you safe and warm until youre readyto have them take you home, so Oh! And also, umm next time you see me, Imscreaming, dont worry, thats whats supposed to happen.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Dr. Zane	 Ready?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.  Good luck.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 All right, the score is nine to eight in favor of the guys. Ladies if youmiss this the game is theirs, pick your category.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	  Its All Relative!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 You dont have to shout everything.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	  Im sorry!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Ooh. What is the name of Chandlers fathers Las Vegas all-maleburlesque?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Viva Las Gaygas!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Unfortunately that is correct.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	The Girls	 Yes!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 All right, we have a tie. Luckily, I have prepared for such an event.  The Lightning Round!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	All	 Ohhhh.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Thirty seconds, all the questions you can answer.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 You guys are dead, I am so good at lighting rounds.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 I majored in lightning rounds. All right, were gonna destroyyou.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Huh, wanna bet?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Well, Im so confused as to what weve been doing sofar
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 How about we play for more money, say 150?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 150 dollars.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Say 200?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 200 dollars.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Youre doing it again.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Excuse me.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Monica, I dont want to lose 200 dollars.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 We wont.  300?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Monica?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Im just trying to spice it up!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Okay, so lets play for some pepper! Stop spending my money!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Oooohh thats interesting.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Hey, no way, that roosters family!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Throw in the duck too!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 What do you have against the duck?! He doesnt make any noise!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Well, he gets the other one all riled up.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Look, we are not gonna
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	  All right, hold on! If you win, we give up the birds.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	  Dah!! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 But if we win, we get your apartment.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Oooooh!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Deal!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Monica, betting the apartment, I dont know about this.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Rachel, I have not missed one question the whole game. I own this game!Look at my hand. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Why? Do you have the answers written on there?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 No! Steady as a rock! Now, are you with me.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 All right, lets do it.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Come on!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Okay. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 All right, gentlemen, youre up first.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Okay.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Okay. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 You have 30 seconds. And the lightning round beginsstop it now. What was Monicas nickname when she was a field hockeygoalie?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Big fat goalie.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Dangerous Liaisons.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct. Her actual favorite movie is...
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Weekend at Bernies.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct. In what part of her body did Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Oh! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Eww! No!! Her ear! All right, Monica categorizes her towels. How manycategories are there?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Everyday use.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Fancy.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Guest.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Fancy guest.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Two seconds
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Uhh, 11!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 11, unbelievable 11 is correct.  All right,thats 4 for the guys. Ladies, youre up. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 All right!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Come on!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 30 seconds on the clock. 5 questions wins the game. The lightning roundbeginsnow! What is Joeys favorite food?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Sandwiches! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct. Chandler was how old when he first touched a girls breast?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 14?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 No, 19.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Thanks man.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Joey, had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Maurice.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct, his profession was?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Space cowboy!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Correct! What is Chandler Bings job?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Oh gosh, it has something to do with numbers.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 And processing.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 He carries a briefcase.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 10 seconds, you need this or you lose the game.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Its umm, it has something to do with transponding.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Oh-oh-oh, hes a transponcetranspondster!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Thats not even a word! I can get this! I can get this!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Oh my God.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler, Joey	 YEAH!!! YES!!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 I call Monicas room!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 You cant just call Monicas room.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Sure I can, standard shotgun rules, Im sight of the room and Icalled it.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Man, I feel like Im coming down with something.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 What?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Yeah.  I bet you cant guess what color my tonsilsare? Ill bet the apartment!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Oh, I would never bet this apartment. Its too nice.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	  Hey!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Hey!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Heyooh Pheebs, are they in there?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Umm, yeah, uh-huh, theyre implanted.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 How do you feel?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Well, freaked. Cause it turns out that the odds are really sucky.And! This is Frank and Alices like only shot. Like, they are literallyputting all of their eggs in my basket.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Yeah, but I bet it works.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Really?! How much?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 All right, Im gonna go take a pregnancy test, right now.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Oh wow! You can tell this soon.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Well the doctor says it takes a couple days, but my bodys alwaysbeen a little faster than Western medicine. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	  Oh my God! I cant believe you guys are actually think youre moving inhere!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Well believe it baby!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Well I-I-Im not moving.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 What?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 No, it was a stupid bet! We were just playing a game!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 You cant just ignore the bet! Its a bet! You bet and you betand if you lose, you lose the bet!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Look Rach, we have to move. I mean if they had lost, we wouldvemade them get rid of the birds. Right?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Noooo.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 All right, look, I hate this as much as you, but if it makes you feelbetter, its all your fault.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 What?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Chinadolor Bong, come on, we steal that TV Guide every week!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 I knew it!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 I dont care, Im not going anywhere.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Cool, girl roommate.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Well?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Nope, not knocked up yet.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Its only been a couple of hours, so just give it some time.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Yeah, all right. Meanwhile, Im gonna do whatever I can to helpthis so, Im just gonna yknow, lie it your chair,  Y'know? Yeah, good, Im let gravityyknow, do its jobs.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Hey, Rach, can you give me a hand with this box?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 No! Put that box down! We are not going anywhere! This is my apartmentand I like it! This is a girls apartment! That is a boys apartment, itsdirty and it smells. This is pretty. Its-its so pretty! And look, andits-its purple! And Im telling you, you with the steady hand, I am notmoving, and now I have got the steady hand.  
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Ill take care of it.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Thats right! You do what the hand says!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 How did it go?
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I lost our mattresses.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	  "Are you in there little fetus? 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Hey!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank, Alice	  Hi!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Alice	 Hi, Phoebe! We were just at the drugstore and we got you a littlepresent.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Oh. Oh.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 Umm, its a lollipop and a uh, a home pregnancy test.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Hey, dont mix those up, you could really ruin that lollipop.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Alice	 So umm, you feel like taking a test? Theres only one question.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 All right, I will. No, I will. But umm, yknow just remember thatits still really early, okay so, if it says that Im not pregnant, thatdoesnt mean that Im not gonna get pregnant, okay and, and just please,just so I dont go completely nuts, just try not put all your hopes on this.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Alice	 Okay.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 Okay. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Great. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Yknow what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Hey, dont get mad at us! No one forced you to raise the stakes!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 That is not true. She did! She forced me!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 Hey, we would still be living here if hadnt gotten the questionwrong!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Well it stupid, unfair question!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Ross	 Dont blame the questions!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 Would you all stop yelling in our apartment! You are ruining movingday for us!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Will you stop calling it your apartment!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 But it is our apartment!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 No its not!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 You guys! You guys! Youre gonna have a baby! Theyre gonnahave a baby!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Frank	 MY SISTERS GONNA HAVE MY BABY!!!!!!!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Phoebe	 Okay, but this cant be good for the baby.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	All	 Oh! 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I cant find garbage bags!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 Oh, I think I saw some in here. 
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 What is it?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Rachel	 I dont know! But maybe if we keep that drawer shut, itlldie.
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Monica	 I cant believe were living here!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 What?! What-what is it?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Joey	 Did you see the size of the closets?!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler	 I cant believe we live here!
04	12	0412	The One With The Embryos	Chandler, Joey	 Awwwww!!  Awwwwwww!!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Okay, she is the star of the play. And she is my girlfriend! Iget to have sex with the star of the play!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 People can hear you.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 I know!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Wow! She looks great. Doesnt she?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Yeah.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy'S Co-Star	 Hi!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Hi!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 That is one good looking man!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Is it just me, or can you actually see his abs through his overcoat?!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy'S Co-Star	 Sooo, youve been doing this long?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 No, youre my first. Put the money on the table.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy'S Co-Star	 Oh, yeah! Ooh, thats nice. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Dude!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy'S Co-Star	 Is that an expensive blouse?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 If you want it to be. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Heres your girlfriends button. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh, hey, Mon, do you still have your like old blouses and dresses fromhigh school?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Yeah, I think I have some around here somewhere. Why? 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Well, its just that maternity clothes are so expensive.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Hey, Rach! I made a pile of your stuff over on this side of the room. Ifyou could justthrow your purses atit.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Bloomingdales eliminated my department. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Oh my God, are you out of a job?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 No, but they stuck me in personal shopping. Which is just a hugestep down!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Personal shopping? What is that? Like where you walk around with snootyrich people and tell them what to buy?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 That sounds great!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	  Hey! 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Umm, excuse me, we switched apartments. You cant eat are foodanymore, that-that gravy train had ended.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	  Theres gravy?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 If you have the big apartment you have to deal with people coming overall the time. That fridge has got to be stocked, okay, thats your department now.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 What are you doing?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 I think I left a donut up here.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Ooh! How was Kathys play?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Well, Kathy gets half-naked and simulates sex with a real goodlookin guy.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yeah, its like someone literally wrote down my worstnightmare and then charged me $32 to see it!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Thats a good idea for a business!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Im totally screwed. Okay, they are gonna be hot and heavy onstage every night, and then theyre gonna go to their cast parties and hesgonna try to undermine me. Y'know itll be like, "So wheres yourboyfriend, whats-his-name, Chester?" And shell go, "No-no-no,its Chandler." And hell go, "Whatever. Ha-ha-ha-ha!"
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	  That-that is a good trick.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 All right, look, look, what am I gonna do?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Chandler, look theyre actors. Theyre there to do a job, justcause they work together, doesnt mean theyre gonna get together. I meanjust cause it happened with Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, it doesnt meanits gonna happen with them.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh-oh, Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Yeah.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Hey, Mel Gibson and Clint Eastwood.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Theyre not a couple!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh-okay, I get the game now.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Okay look, look, let me ask you a question, when they were doing it onstage, was it like really hot?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh yeah!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Well okay, so then youre fine. The rule is when two actors areactually doing it off-stage all the sexual tension between them is gone. Okay? So as longas its hot onstage you got nothing to worry about. Its when the heat goesaway, thats when youre in trouble.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Really?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Look, you guys have been to every play Ive ever been in, have I everhad chemistry on stage?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 No.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Noooo!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 So uh, man, are you gonna go to the play with me tonight?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Yknow what, I dont know how comfortable I am going to see howhot the sex is between some guy and your girlfriend.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yeah, I know but
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh no-no-no, Im there.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	  Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Hey Mon! Want some pancakes?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 You made pancakes?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Yep! Grab a plate.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Okay. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 No-no, stay right there.  Gettin closer.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Okay, okay, but dont worry, because we also have cereals,muffins, waffles, and, jams, jellies, and marmalades. Which Im fairly certainare the same thing.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Listen also were uh, were watching the game here Saturdaynight, if people want to come over.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh yeah!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Oh, I was thinking about having people over for the game.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Oh yeah, whos playing?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 The players.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Somebody seems to be missing being the hostess.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	  Please, its a relief is what it is, is what it is.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 All right Pheebs, stick out your plate!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	  Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 year oldwoman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it!  Im telling youIm quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now!  Yes Iam!  Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when youget this message.  Oh! Mr. Waltham, I ahreally need to talk to you.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Mr. Waltham	 In a moment, please, Im in the middle of a task. And you havea customer. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Hi!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Hi, Im Joshua.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Hi, Im Rachel Green. What can I do for you Joshua?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Well, I need a whole new wardrobe. My wife, well my ex-wife
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Oh, Im so sorry.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Anyway, she burned all of my clothes. I got away with two things. Thissuit and what turned out to be a skirt.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Well, at least thats a great suit.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Yeah, but it wasnt much fun dropping it off at the dry cleaners inthe skirt.  So I need everything down to underwear, so if yourewilling, Im all yours.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Okay.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Mr. Waltham	 Rachel, you needed to speak to me?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 No-no, that wasnt me!  Well, we should get started. Letme show you my underwear.  The selection of underwear we carry.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Oh-oh, sorry, its this way, its this way. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Its this way? Sorry. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Im right! Right? There was like no chemistry between them.Before they had heat, and now theres no heat! Now you know what this means, Joeytold us what this means!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 All right, lets not jump to any conclusions. All right? There wassome sexual chemistry between them.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Come on, it was like cousins having sex up there!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Here she comes. Dont say a word, okay? Just be cool, dontbey'know you.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Hey you guys!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Hi!  Thank you so much for coming again. Did you like ittonight?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh, absolutely! 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Wasnt Nick funny when he couldnt get his match lit?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Its a good play, isnt it?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Oh, I loved the play. You were great, and Nick ditto. Clearlyyoure having sex with him.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Okay, I 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Clearly, Im having sex with him?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Oh come on, it was so obvious! There was no chemistry between you two!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Okay, so let me just get this straight. Youre accusing me ofcheating on you, and insulting my performance?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yknow, I-I could see how this could happen, y'know youreup there every night, youre naked, touching, kissing.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Acting! Chandler, this is my job! Im-Im playing a part in aplay! How can you not trust me?!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well, you can understand, given how we started.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Oh, wow. I cant believe youre throwing that in my face.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well, that is what happened, and I dont even see you denyingthis!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Ill tell you what, Chandler, why dont you call me when yougrow up!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yeah, well, dont expect that to happen anytime soon!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 I have the best job in the entire world! The most adorable guy came overtoday, and I got to dress him up all day!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Rachel has a new doll.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Oh, I wish he was a doll, then I could get a Rachel doll and bump themtogether and make kissy noises. Oh! And he has the most beautiful name, I never realisedit, Joshua! Josh-u-a! Joshua! Josh.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Uh, hello!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Hi-e!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Ooh, what do I smell?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 I dont know, it smells good.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Fresh cookies! Hot from the oven!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Ooh! 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Please, have some!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh, yumm!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Yeah, Ive just been fiddling around in here making delicioustreats for everyone.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	  Wow! The new Playboy!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Yeah, its just something I picked up.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Cookies and porn, youre the best mom ever!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 What? What?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to bethere.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Yeah, how does Jason look in a v-neck?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Its Joshua.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh, whatever. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Wait! Wait! This isnt take-out!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	  Well, I hate to eat and run, but
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 No, wait, please dont go! Ive got porn for you too!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Yeah, I dont need it.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 People are supposed to wanna hang out here!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Why? Honey, what is the big deal?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Im the hostess! Not those guys! Im always the hostess! Imean, I was always the hostess, I mean even when I was little, I mean the girls broughttheir dollies to my tea party, I-I served the best air.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Well, why did you make like a whole big thing out of y'know, everyonehas to hang out in the big apartment?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Cause they took our apartment, I wanted to punish them. ButIm-Im done now. Theyve suffered enough.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 If you wanted to punish them, you shouldve just made them hang outhere! 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Yeah, thats true.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 All right then, when Im done with this place, its gonna beten times better than that place!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh, are we gonna trash that place?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Steps!  Slut!  You will all be very happyto hear that Kathy is sleeping with that guy!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	All	 What?!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 So you were right?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 I confronted her, and she didnt deny it!  I dontlive here! 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Chandler!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Chandler, what did she say?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Wait a minute.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Come here.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Are you sure?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well, I may be drunk, but I know what she said! Then I went over to BeefsteakJulies
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Beefsteak Charlies?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yes! See you and I have always been like
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Whoops.  Oh, hey, do youneed help with that?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Nah, I got it.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Ooh, I just feel bad, I never vacuum. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Hi!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	All	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out.Its just so frustrating!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Why dont you ask him out?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Oh, yeah, totally! Thats such a turn-on!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Really? It doesnt seem desperate?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Oh-ooh, thats the turn-on.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 He just got a divorce right? 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Hmm-mmm.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 So hes probably really nervous around women, y'know? Maybe, youjust have to make the first move.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Yeah but, Ive never asked a guy out before.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	  Youve never asked a guy out?!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 No. Have you?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Thousands of times!! That doesnt make me sound too good does it?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 I dont even know how I would go about it.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say,"Hey, how you doin?"
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh, please!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	  Hey, how you doin?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 You know what, Im gonna do that, Im gonna call him up, andIm gonna ask him out. I can do that. Ask him out.  How you doin? Hi! Joshua? Its Rachel Green from Bloomingdales. Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the storetoday? Well, we found a wallet, and we the license? Well, that is agood idea! Uh, well, lets see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh,belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. Illsee you tomorrow. Bye.   Youve done that a thousand times?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Ive never done that.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Ohh, God, I just got so nervous that he would say no.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Well, you gotta give him something that he cant say no too. Like uh,Knicks tickets! Invite the guy to a Knicks game, youre guaranteed hell sayyes!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Really?! You think that will work?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Absolutely! And if it doesnt, can I get the extra ticket?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 What the heck is that?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Did she call?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 No, sorry.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 All right, maybe I should call her.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 No! Forget her, man! You dont need her, you dont need that!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Hes right, what she did was unforgivable.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well, yeah, but y'know, what-what if I was wrong?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 How might you be wrong?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well y'know, what if she didnt actually sleep with the guy?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Dude, tell me she actually told you this.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 She did not have to tell me, I saw the play, and there was no heat.Back me up here, Ross!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Thats all youre basing this on?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Thats not backing me up! Look, you said with the off-stage andthe heat, and the onstage and the oy heat.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, that-that was just a theory! Theres a lot of theoriesthat didnt pan out. The lone gunman. Communism. Geometry.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Oh my God!!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Would you like to go to a basketball game with me?  Youknow, its funny, basketball, because I happen to have tickets too Umm, who likes the Knicks
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 What do you think?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Oh! Well, as a single woman, who is available, I think you look great!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Huh.  Yeah?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Yep. Oh, yeah, look you great.  Oh yeah. Yeah, this looks great.  Umm, so you likeit?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 I do. I do. I love it. In fact, I think Im gonna wear it home.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Great.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 All right, thank you so much for all your help. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Sure.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Well, I guess this is uh, I guess this is it.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Yeah-eah-ha!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Thanks.  Maybe Ill see in the spring, with theuh, yknow, for the uh, bathing suits.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Oh well, you dont want to do that now?!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Ah, thats okay, thanks.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Okay.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Anyway, hopefully, Ill see you around sometime. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Basketball!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	  Im sorry.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if youreinterested, just as a thank you for this week.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Wow! That would be great.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Really?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Yeah, that would be fantastic! My-my nephew is crazy about the Knicks!This is fantastic, thank you so much Rachel. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Mr. Waltham	 Good morning.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joshua	 Hi!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	  Hey.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Hey. I just, I just wanted to come over to-to say that Im sorry.Yknow? I know I acted like the biggest idiot in the world, and I can completelyunderstand why you were so upset.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Oh wow. I really wish youd call me.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yeah, I know, I-I wish I had too, but yknow I-I think this is agood thing. Y'know? Cause weve had our first fight, and now we can move on.Yknow, I know for meNicks pants?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Kathy	 Yeah.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Yeah. Well, I think our second fight is going to be a big one!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Okay, for next time, what do you say?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 I have an extra ticket. An extra ticket. Not, two tickets, I have anextra ticket.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 So the first time you ask a guy out, he-he turns you down?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 He didnt turn me down! Hes at the game isnt he? I gotthe date, Im just not on it!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	  Okay, its ready. Come on.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Whats ready?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Just come. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Oh my God!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Wow! Monica!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Great!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 This is beautiful!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh did youwhat did youdid you work for two days straight?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Pretty much.  So, what do you, what do you think of the floor?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 I dont know, it looks the same.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 You used to have carpet.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Oh yeah!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 So I made snacks. Please, just hang out okay? Im just gonna restmy eyes just a little bit.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Look, Mon, do you want us to uh, come back later?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Monica	 Oh no-no-no, stay, stay, stay, just keep talking. Im always thehostess.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Hey!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Joey	 Howd it go?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Well, she wasnt sleeping with him.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 Oh good!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 She is now.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 What are you saying?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Im saying that she is a devil woman! Yknow I meanyou think you know someone and then they turn around and they sleep with Nick! Nick, withhis rock hard pecs, and his giant man-nipples! I hate him, I hate her! Well, Idont hate her, I love her. This is all my fault really.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Phoebe	 How? How is your fault?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Chandler	 Because, I-I shouldve called! Yknow if I had just calledher after our big, stupid fight, she never wouldve gone out with Nick, and theywouldve ended up in bed together. I threw her at his man nipples!
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Honey, this is not your fault, just because you guys had a fight, itdoes not justify her sleeping with someone.
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Ross	 Well, if-if she thought they were on a break
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Mr. Waltham	 Rachel, one of your customers seems to have left his billfold. AJoshua Bergen. 
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Really?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Mr. Waltham	 Will you call him?
04	13	0413	The One With Rachel's Crush	Rachel	 Yes! I will! Absolutely!  Hello, Rachel. Hi, Joshua. I left mywallet here on purpose. Really? Yes, I just wanted to see you again. Oh, Im glad.Rachel, Id like to say something to you. Yes? How you doin?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	  So now, what is this now?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Guggly worm.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	  And this?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Glow-pop giggly jammer.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	  You make it so funny.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	  Hey umm, whatsthis?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Ohh, a hunk of sandwich from last year. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	  Ohh, Gellers got one hooked!Ohh! Looks like a big one! Yeah, ohh! Ohh!  Its theclassic struggle between man and Someoneknocked over a lamp.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Thats all right. Hey you guys,you know whats going to be great about the fishing trip this year? When my dad getsme out in the middle of the lake and gives me that, "Joey, what are you doing withyour life?" stuff. I can say, "Well, Im doing a movie with Charlton Hestondad. What are you doing with your life?"
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	All	 Great!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 You dont have to stop having fun just because Im here.Kathy didnt cheat on all of you.  Well, except you. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Hey, Joey, I dont think that you should leave Chandler alone. Imean its only been two days since he broke up with Kathy. Maybe you can go fishingnext week?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Look, theres nothing I can do for him right now, hes still inhis sweat pants, thats still Phase One. Y'know? Ill be back for Phase Two, Iwould never miss Phase Two.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Whats Phase Two?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Gettin drunk and going to a strip club. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 How does going to a strip club help him better?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Because there are naked ladies there.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Which helps him get to Phase Three, picturing yourself with other women.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 There are naked ladies there too.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	  Wouldyou give me one minute!! Please.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 So, these will match the jacket you picked out for me last week?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Um-hmm.  There we go. There it is.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	  Oh! You know what I need? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Gloves. Brown, leather dress gloves.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, okay. Uhh, well lets see.  Youreaboutwell uh, this one is large. And this one
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Also large?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah! Okay, two larges coming right up!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Okay.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	  Rachel! Could I have a moment?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yes.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	 I-I was wondering, my niece you see is in from LondonwellShropshire really but yknowwell shes about your age I say. Anyway I havetickets for the opera, Die Fledermaus, and I was wondering if youd like to keep hercompany this evening?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Sure. You got it. Great! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	 Oh, good.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Me, Fledermaus, great. I really
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	 Ohh! Yes of course, thank you, thank you, thank you so very much.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 So
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 So? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Gloves?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ohh! Right! Right, sorry, Ill be right back!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Uhh, actually yknow what, I kindaI have to take off. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 But, I was curious; do you have any plans for tonight?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No! Nothing!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 I invested in this night-club and its opening tonight, would youlike to come?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah! That would be great!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Youre into hardcore S&M right?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	  Well, I-I guessI
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joshua	 Kidding!  Im gonna get there early, butIm going to put you on the V.I.P list, okay? Look for me.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah, great, you betcha!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	  I almost forget the tickets, didnt I?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 What?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	 For you and Emily, tonight, Die Fledermaus.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh. Oh, right.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Mr. Waltham	 I think youll like it, it has two out of the three tenors.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh yay!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Yknow, I cant believe Kathy did this too me. I really,thought that she was the one. I tell you what, from now on Im never getting out ofthis chair, ever! Okay? From now on, this chair is the one! You wanna what else is theone? My sweat pants!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Come on, man! Just-just take the sweats off. Okay? Just take em offand well have some fun.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Hey-hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Hi!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Catch any big fish? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Oh my God, you guys have no idea. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	All	  Oh! God! Wow!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 You stink!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Are you kidding?!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah, three days on the lake without a shower. Plus! I fell in that bigtub of worms at the bait stand! Hey, how-hows he doing?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 He hasnt gotten out of that chair in two days.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Hey buddy! Hows it going?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Hey, see that? He just needed his pal to comehome. All right, uh, Ive got to go memorise my lines.  Meand Charlton Heston bright and early tomorrow morning! Yeah-yeah!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	  Hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Hey, Monica!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Uh-oh, whats the matter?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ohh, its Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight.But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera.So What are you gonna do?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 I dont know sweetie.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No! Help me!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 I cant! I have to work!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Phoebe?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 I would, but I get my morning sickness in the evening. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ugh!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Unless! She wants to spend the night holding my hair back for me.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ohh, gosh. You guys, come on, this isI have to meet Joshua! Thisis my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. Yknow the "Wouldnt it begreat if she was my wife" Rachel. Ohh, all right! Are Joey and Chandler back?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 No, Chandlers still in Phase One, and Joeys that thing yousmell.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ohh!  Hi!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Hi!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 So.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 No.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ohhhh, come on!!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 I think shes here.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No! Wait! Wait-wait! Ross, please!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 You want me to take some girl Ive never met to the opera so you cango to a club and flirt with some guy, hmm, that-that is a toughie.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	  Ohh, shes looking down the hall. Oh!She looked right at me! Oh wait, you cant see people through that little hole, canyou?  Hello!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Woman	 Hello! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ill be right there!  Okay, Ross, please come on! Ithought we have moved on! I thought weve gotten to a place where we could be happyfor each other! I mean was that just me?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 All right, Ill do it.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh thank you! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Emily?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	 Yes.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Im Rachel Green.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	 Thank goodness.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Theres been a teeny-teeny change in plans. It turns out thatIm not free tonight. So
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	 Really?! Well, thats just lovely, isnt it? I mustvemissed your call, even though I didnt leave the flat all day. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh well, no I
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	 Oh, no-no-no, thats not rude! Its perfectly in keeping with atrip that Ive already been run down by one of your wiener carts, and beenstrip-searched at John F. Kennedy Airport, apparently to you people, I look like someonewhos got a balloon full of cocaine stuffed up their bum.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 I-I-I think you look great.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	 Good night, it was very nice to meet you all. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Ill get her.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Please hurry.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Dont you just love the way they talk?!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Ohh!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 What?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 It kicked! I think the baby kicked!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh my God!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Oh no wait, oh no, the elastic on my underwear busted.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Oh my God! I overslept! I was supposed to be onthe set a half an hour ago! I gotta get out of here!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh wait, Joey, you cant go like that! You stink!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Look, I know I feel asleep before I could shower and now I dont havetime! Theyre just ten blocks away, if I run, I can make it.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Yeah. Run ten blocks, thatll help the smell.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Heywhoa, slow down.  No, keep moving.  Wow!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 So? How did it go with Joshua last night?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Well, I didnt see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girlin the face.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 What?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Why?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 The whole night was horrible, it was pouring down rain, and when I gotthere, there was no Rachel Green on the list, but there was a Rachel Greep.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Ohh! So, did you get to meet her?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No, there is no Rachel Greep, but then this other girl overheard us andshe was all, "Im Rachel Greep! Im Rachel Greep!" and he let herright in. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 So you hit her in the face?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to stealmy umbrella, so I clocked her. Ohhh! I cant believe this, all I wanted was a fewhours outside of work to see Joshua, so he can go ahead and start falling in love with me.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	  Aww, Pheebs.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Honey, thats youre name.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Thats short for Phoebe?! I thought that was just what we calledeach other!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Hey! Youre wearing pants!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Thats right! Where are the guys? Im ready to get drunk andsee some strippers.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Its 9:30 in the morning!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 They got a breakfast buffet.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Hello.  Oh, hey Ross!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Ooh, let me talk to him!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh-oh, my God!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Well, can I just
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	  Shh!!  Wait, what?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Shes shhing me! Its my phone and shes shhing me!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Shhh!! Please! Whats he saying?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Hes with Emily at a Bed and Breakfast in Vermont!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 What? Oh my God!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 What? Who the hell is Emily noooo!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Theyre in Vermont!! How could this happen?! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Ow!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Howhow did end up in Vermont with that awful witch?! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Maybe, she doesnt hit him all the time. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 When we first met her, she was soaking, her feet were wet! Whowouldnt be miserable? Im telling you when I got her into a dry pair of shoes,she was a totally different person.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Emily	  Ross! Come quickly! Theres a deer just outside eatingfruit from the orchard!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Ive gotta go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from theorchard! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 He had to go, theres a deer just outside eating fruit from theorchard.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 I dont get this! She was horrible! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Okay, Im going to go stand over there. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Why do you care so much anyway?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 I dont care! All right, yknow what Im just upset thatIm getting nowhere with Joshua thatyknow what still, you do not meetsomeone and go flitting off to Vermont!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Well, when you first met Barry, you flitted off to Vail.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, yknow, would you just for once, not remembereverylittlething!! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 So yknow, uh, whens he getting back?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 A couple of days.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Yknow, I knew something like this was going to happen. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 What are you doing?! Chandler! You cant just go back a phase!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Yes you can. Youre thinking about time, you cant go backin time.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Well, look, why dont you just, why dont you do your PhaseTwo strip club thing with us.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Yeah, come on, we can be guys!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	  No you cant.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Come on! Let us be guys! Maybe we want to be guys!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 You dont want to be guys, youd be all hairy andwouldnt live as long. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Yknow you, you just stop being such a wuss and get those off andyou come with us and watch naked girls dance around!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Okay. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Im sorry. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Hey! Joey Tribbiani! Im here! Im here! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 Calm down, we got time, were running a little late.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Look at that, Charlton Heston eating a liquorice whip!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 Yeah, we loves em. Ive never seen him with
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	  Whoa! Yeah, whatthe hell is that? What smells so bad?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 You.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yknow, I can see why you think that, but ah, actually, you know whoI think it is?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 You?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 No-no, its uh, its Heston.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 What?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah, the man wreaks! Smells like he went on a three day fishing trip andthen ate some liquorice. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 Theres no way he smells, hes the only one around here witha shower in his dressing room.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Really, a shower huh? And uh, which-which room might that be?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The A.D	 The one with "Heston" on it.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Interesting.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	  Okay, Ivegot some Ones, you wanna put them in her panties?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 No thanks, Mom!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Oh, no umm, hi, that-that, you have to put that out, causeIm pregnant.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The Cigarette Smoking Guy	  Well, maybe you and your baby should go to another strip club.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Ha-ha, its not my baby, ha-ha-ha! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Very good,  so good.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	  I really, really enjoyed it. Very exotic.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	  Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didntcall. I mean youd think hed be worried about me not showing up at his club.Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Come on! Look where you are!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	  When you get a sec, another round of daiquiris.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Remember, a virgin for me please.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh! And dont let me leave without getting the name of that carpetguy.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Ahh, come on! Yknow whatyknow what, I think Imjust gonna go home and call Kathy.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Well, if you think it will help.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 No! That was a test! In a couple of hours Im gonna get reallydrunk and wanna call Kathy and you guys are gonna have to stop me! And then after that,Im gonna get so drunk, Im gonna wanna call Janice
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 You should! How is she?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Ohhh!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 I think somebody needs another lap dance. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Hello! Whos in there? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 How ya doin?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Who in the hell are you?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 I guess you wouldnt believe me if I said I was Kurt Douglas, huh?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Put some pants on kid so I can kick your butt.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 No-no-no, no, no, wait. You see, Im an actor, Joey Tribbiani,Im doing a scene with you today, and well, I stink.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	  Youre in this picture?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, Im one of the cops that wont work with youcause you a lose cannon. Anyway, look, Im really sorry, but I stink!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Joey, right?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	  Every actor at one time or anotheropp!  Every actor thinks hestinks, even Lawrence Oliver at sometimes thought he stank, Bob Redford wont evenwatch himself.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Oh no-no-no, you dont understand
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Listen to me!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Oh yeah, yeah.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 I dont know one actor worth his salt that didnt sayat one time or another, "God, I stink!" Hell, I just did a scene out there,first take, I stunk the place up. But, the important thing you must remember, no matterhow badly you think you might stink, you must never, ever bust into my dressing room anduse my shower! Do you understand me?!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yes sir! Yes sir, Im-Im
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Charlton Heston	 Wait a minute! Take your pants.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah. Oh, yeah.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 So, we did okay at the strip club, right?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Oh yeah, that was great. Thanks to you, the hottest cocktail waitressthere is quitting to teach the third grade!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	  I cant believe it! He still hasnt called.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Who, Josh?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Its Joshua.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 What, he doesnt like Josh?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No, I dont.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 All right, well Im gonna put my sweats back on.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Oh no! Wait! Wait! Okay, yknow what, you were right, you wereright. We really werent great at being guys, but you know why? Because weregirls.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Yeah?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 And do you know what girls are really good at?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Stripping!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 No, listening! Sit! Yknow, maybe it would just really, really helpif you would just talk.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah, come on! Whats going in on in there? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Yeah. And yknow, if you wanna cry, thats okay too.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Okay, look, Im gonna have to ask you all to leave.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Come on! Chandler!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Look, forget it. We tried, but Phase Three is a lost cause, Okay?Those strippers were insanely hot, and I couldnt picture myself with any of them.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 They really were pretty, werent they? 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Yeah, I really liked that fighter pilot one.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh, Candy! She was so spunky! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Yeah.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Yknow, I think if I were going to be with a woman.  Itd, itd be with someone like Michelle, she was so oh, she was sopetite.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 See, I dont know, for me it would have to Chantal.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Oh, Chantal!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh my goodness, she had the smoothest skin! I mean when I stuck thatdollar bill in her g-string and grazed her thigh
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	  Phase Three! I just achieved Phase Three!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Really?!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 I am totally picturing you with all those women!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Thats-thats not Phase Three.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Well, Im there too!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Well, are we all together? Like in a group?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Stop it! Youre killing me! I think I just moved on to PhaseFour!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Oh! What is that? What is that?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Where I dont want to have a relationship ever! I just want tohave sex with strippers and my friends!!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Come on, let me see that smile.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 I dont wanna.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Please?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 I wanted to go to the strip club!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 I know, I know, but youre gonna have plenty of chances. Thereare literally thousands of women out there just waiting to screw me over.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Joey	 Yeah, all right. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 Heyooh so, how was Vermont?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Emily isincredible. I mean there-there are no words to describe it,I mean the whole weekend was like a dream. Oh! And you! Rach!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, hey!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Hey! You were so right!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 What?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Uh, what you said, about us being in a place where we could finally behappy for each other. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, hmm.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 I mean, I, I-I admit I-I wasnt quite there. Yknow, I mean thethought of you and that-that Josh guy
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Joshua.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Joshuaguy at that club, dancing and having a good time, the thoughtof it kindayknow.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Yeah, I
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 But now! Im there! Im totally there! Im-Im finallywhere you are!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, thank goodness!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Yeah, and-and thank you for Emily.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 Oh, no problem. Im so glad I could help. Happy for you. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Ross	 Happy for you. 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No, happy for you! 
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 All right ladies, heres what were gonna do.  You are gonna take off my clothes.  You two,go get the oils.  And you just constantly scream at the top of yourvoice, "Chandlers the king! Chandlers the king!"
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Phoebe	 I-I wanna be with her,  I like her.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Oh, thats fine! Go with your instincts, go with your instincts.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Monica	 Wait, now, what am I doing again?
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 Come on! Would you please pay attention, I could wake up at anymoment!
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	The Cigarette Guy	 Hi, Im Joshua, Im here to pick up Rachel.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Rachel	 No-no-no, that not Joshua.
04	14	0414	The One With Joey's Dirty Day	Chandler	 What do you want from me, Ive never met the guy. So anyway,Rachel, Im sorry you cant stay,  but the rest of us have a lot of work to do.  What are you doing?  All right,listen, Ive got to wake up!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Y'know, I can't believe I'm getting my nails done!  And yousaid it was gonna be fun!  Which it kinda is.  Also, you said there would beother guys here. There are no other guys here!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Chandler, theres a guy right over there. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Thats a mailman! Thats our mailman!   Hi. How are ya?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Chandler, dont worry! This doesnt make you any less of aguy!  That does! What am I sitting on?  I hateto think what this woman was scratching when this broke off.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Hey, you know who used to have nails like that?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Hmm.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Woman	 OHMYGAWD!! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Joey let me ask you a question. What does this light switch do?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Ohh, Nothing.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Didnt it drive you crazy to have a switch and not know what itdid?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 I know what it did! Nothing.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 They wouldnt have put it there if it didnt do something! Howcan you not care?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Like this. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Well, heres another question for ya. Uhh, do you know what thatsilver knob on the toilet does?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Sure! It flushes it.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Okay, good. Now that since you know, when you come over would you mindactually using it?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  Hello!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Hey!  Ah!! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Guess who we ran into today?!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Janice?!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Isnt this amazing? 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 How have you been?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh well, Im divorced.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Ohhh, wow.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Yeah, Im riding the alimony pony. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 And there it is.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 I just came up to say, "Hi!" Hi!  And you,sweetie, Ill see you tonight.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Okay. Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 B-bye!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Bye-bye.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Bye.   Icant stand the woman! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 What?! I thought you were crazy about her!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Yeah, I know, but all of those little annoying things she did beforewe fell in love? Like her voice, her laugh, her personalityWell, theyre allback! Yknow? And shes picked up like nine new ones!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 So what are you doing bringing her here?! Theres people here!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Dont worry about it. Im taking care of it tonight.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 You are not. You have never been able to break up with her.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  Well, I dont have to breakup with her this time. Were not involved! Im going to do a pre-emptive strike!Im going to end it with her before it starts. My ass is like frozen!  
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Yeah, try sticking it in the freezer for 20 minutes.  Im tellin ya!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 I cant believe you really walk alone here! I mean, you hear suchstories about New York.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 No, its really not that bad. I mean, I-I for one, feel perfectlysafe.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Help! Help!! Help! Help!!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 No, no, no Ross! Ross, these are friends of mine from home.  Liam, Devon, this is Ross.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Devon	 Hey, mate.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 How are ya man?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Oh hey, that was a good one, huh?  Help! Help!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 So how are you? Ive been meaning to ring you ever since I arrivedbut umm, well, Ive been rather busy.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Devon	 Do you realise that we have not seen each other since the night of thatU2 concert?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Oh my God. I think youre right.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	  Well, actually the last time you and I saw eachother was that morning.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Oh, Liam. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Oh, Liam. So uh, what, were you guys playing soccer or somethingorshould I call it  football?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Devon	 We were playing rugby.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 In fact were playing a game at the park tomorrow. Yourewelcome to play too if you want.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	  Ross play rugby? I dont think so.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Whats ah, whats so funny about that?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Well I mean, youre American to start with. You dont even haverugby here.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Well, we didnt have freedom here until 1776, either so
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Devon	 So good then! Well see you at Riverside Park at 2:00! Cheers!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 Cheers!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Cheers!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh boy, I just love to sing!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Yes, I-I know that you do, but I think one of the reasons people werecomplaining though, was that they paid to hear the actor sing Old Man River.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh, look at us! Who wouldve thought that Cupid had a station at14th Street Nails. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  Okay, we have to talk. Im just getting out of a veryserious relationship
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 I know! And Im just getting out of a marriage, I mean talk aboutmeant to be!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Right! I just think that this is happening too soon.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh, too soon, too schmoon. Face it honey, I am not letting you get awaythis time.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 I hear ya.  But! Unfortunately, my company is transferring meoverseas!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh no! Where to?  Too Paris?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 No! No! Not, Paris. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	Too London? No-no, Rome? Vienna? Ooh-ooh, Barcelona?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Okay, could you just stop talking for a second?  Yemen.Thats right, yes, Im being transferred to Yemen!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 When?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 I dont know exactly.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Ugh, well I will just have to soak up every once of Chandler Bing untilthat moment comes.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 But I do know that its some time tomorrow.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Done?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Yep!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	  Hey!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Hey! Whats up?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 This switch thing has been driving me crazy. So I turned it off andchecked every outlet. Now, four of them dont work. Which means, one of themhas to be controlled by the switch. So, I plugged in things in all four of the outletsthat-that make noise, so that way, when I turn it on I just follow the noise and find outwhich one it is.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	  I bet I stopped listening before you did.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Yknow, you-you also couldve used uh, lamps and thenfollowed the light.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Yeah, well, Im using noise. Okay. All right! So, is everybodyready? Here we go.  I hear something! I hearsomething! Where is it? 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Its coming from Joey!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Oh my God, thats so freaky! Turn him off!!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Ooh, hey, could we put on the news? I think it might be raining.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Oh, just hold on a second. Im watching this rugby thing on ESPN.I dont know what the big deal is. Im man enough to play this sport.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Dude, youre not even man enough to order the channel thatcarries the sport.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	  Hey there Ross!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	  Hey!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	  Janice.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Yknow uh, you didnt really have to help me pack.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Ohh, well when you said all you were going to be doing between now andthe time you leave is packing, you didnt really leave me much choice. Did you?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Well, I-I thought I did but, I-I guess I did not!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Hey-hey, whats going on?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Oh, Im packing. Yknow Im-Im packingcause Im moving to Yemen tomorrow.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Thanks for telling me!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Im only going to pretend Im moving to Yemen, its theonly way I can get rid off her.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Ohhhh, good one! And Yemen that actually sounds like a real country.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	  Chandler! Come on, Im gonna show howto roll up your underwear and stuff it in your shoes. Its a real space saver.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, I do that cause it makes me look taller.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Okay, Chandler, come on!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  Okay.  Joey, trade lives with me!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Nope.  Man look at this! Ross, I cant believe you saidyoud play rugby. I mean look how brutal this is!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Hey, I can handle it! All right?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Please, Ross, you-you got hurt playing badminton with my dad.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Thats cause-cause youre moms dog kept-keptlooking at me.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	  Okay, Ross, look-look-look-look, look right here.Thats called a scrum, okay? Its kinda like a huddle.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 And is a hum, kinda like a scruddle?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Ross!  Theyre gonna kill you!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Well, why are you doing this anyway?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Well, you shouldve seen the guy that she used to go out with. Imean, hes like Joe Rugby.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Youre kidding! And he plays rugby?! Thats so funny. Ohh! I see how you did that. All right.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Anyway, she thought the very idea of me playing rugby with him waslike hilarious. So Im gonna show her how tough I really am!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	  Im sorry. Im sorry.Youre right, you are a tough guy. Youre the toughest palaeontologist I know.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 All right, come on look, Ross can take care of himself! Its not likehesChandler!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  Thanks!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Look, dont worry about me. Okay? Ill just stay real energeticand stay away from the ball. Ill uh, Ill be that guy right out of the circle.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	All	 Oh!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Oh, well maybe there was a dog lookin at him.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Ross-Ross-Ross-Ross! Stay away from that guy , and that guy. And that oneDude! Theyre all huge!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 They dont look any bigger than me!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Well, maybe thats because youre closer to you. So you lookbigger to you from where you are.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Im just going to say hi to the lads. All right?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 All right.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Okay.  
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	  Hi.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Whoa!  I kinda liked it.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Okay, I know what I have to do. Ive got to go Red Ross.  Yknow, Red Ross!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 I totally dont know what youre talking about.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Come on! The time we were all waiting in line for Dances With Wolves andthat one guy cut in line in front of us and I just lost it?! Screamed at him! Turned allred! Red Ross!!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 No.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Youll see.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Liam, do me a favour. Tell the lads to go easy on Ross, its hisfirst time.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 You dont say! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	  Good luck, babe.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 Ross! Ross! Come on! Get in here!  Ross! Come on!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Liam	 Ross, come on! Get in the bloody scrum! Ross, get in!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 JOEY!!!!!!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Youarenot going to believe it! Joshua came into work today,and guess what happened?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 He asked you out?!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 No. But I was showing him some cufflinks and I felt his pulse.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Saucy!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	  What are these?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Electrical plans for the building.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Okay, okay, okay should I be scared?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 I know that switch does something, okay? So-so I went down to city halland got these. All I had to do was pay $25 and wait in line for three hours.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Wow! If only more people knew.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Yknow you, really didnt have to take me to the airport.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh please. Every moment is precious. Yknow? Besides, somebody hadto ride in that other taxi with the rest of your luggage, and your friends dontreally seem to care too much that youre leaving.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Well, were really not that close.  Okay, so I guess thisis uh, good-bye then.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 On no! No! Its not good-bye, Im not leaving until you get onthat plane.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Okay. Then I guess its just, wait here then.   Hi. I need one fake ticket to Yemen.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ticket Counter Attendant	 One ticket to Yemen?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, no. No, no, no, I just, I just need a pretend ticket.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ticket Counter Attendant	 Im sorry sir, I dont understand. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 What would you give to a kid if he wanted a ticket to play with?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ticket Counter Attendant	 Are you travelling with a child?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 No. All right, yknow what, shes  gonnathink that Im handing you a credit card, but what Im really gonna do is handyou a library card.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ticket Counter Attendant	 Ah, sir a ticket to Yemen is $2,100 and we donttake library cards.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Whats the matter? Is something wrong? Do you have to stay?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	  American Express?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 I cant believe theyre doing that to him! I told them to goeasy on him!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 No offence but, yknow sometimes its hard to understand you,yknow with the accent, so
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Thats just halftime, theres more of this.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Did you see me? I was pretty good, huh? That is one fun game!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Right.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	  Hey, could you do me a favour? Could you just grab me a bottleof water? 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Okay.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Thanks.  I-I think Imdying. I really do. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Oh, poor baby.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	  Tell my son that I love him. Excellent! Well, okay, I gotta have some more fun!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Ross, they are killing you out there!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	  Thats not true!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Shes right! You have to stop!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 What? No! No, Im not stopping. Im Red Ross!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Dude, if you go back out there, youre gonna be Dead Ross!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 I dont care! I am not quitting! I insist on finishing this game!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 All right, all right, if you insist on doing this, at least let me helpyou.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 No, God no! That is no place for a woman. Those guys will grab anything.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 No. Thats not what Im saying. I just may know a few thingsthat might help you inflict some pain.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 I like that.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Yeah? Listen closely, Devon has got a weak ankle. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Huh?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 One swift kick and hell back off.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 All right, bad ankle, got it!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 And that big bloke with the beard, he has got a trick hip. Yeah. And uh,and David over there, I heard he doesnt wear a cup.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Yeah? I can use that, trick hip, no cup, okay! Okay!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 And uh, Liam, Liams got bad knees. You hit him right and hellgo down like a lamp.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 But-but, Liams on my team.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 I dont care! You just get him!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Im gonna go get him! Okay, I am going back in! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 The Red Ross! Okay.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Hey!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Hi!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	  What-what are-what are these?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Oh, just some pictures I made and hung up. I thought theydbrighten up the place. They do dont you think?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 No-no-no, no!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 I know that theres no hole there, I just really liked thatpicture.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Oh my God! Look at this!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 Okay, but there is a wire back there! I mean that switch isconnected to something!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 I dont care! The wires have come loose in your head!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 I just thought that if I could follow the wire I could find out what itdid.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 And did you?!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 No. It disappears back there behind that baseboard. For a minute there,I thought it went downstairs.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 But it didnt. Say hello to Mrs. Chatracus.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Oh my God.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Mrs. Chatracus	 Hello darling.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Hello, Mrs. Chatracus.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Now, are you sure you dont want to go see a doctor?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Oh no! That-thatll just bring me down! This was great! I mean I-I-Iwas great! This is a great day! Yknow what? Im buying everyone coffee. Allright? If someone would just grab my wallet, its in my pocket. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Yeah, sure.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 No, not you. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Joey	 Uhh, look, your eyes still popping out a little, Im gonna goget some ice.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 Ooh, ice! I am so in the mood for ice! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 You were amazing out there.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Oh, I kinda was, wasnt I?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Oh my God!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 I made a man twice my size cry. I mean, I havent done that since Iwas four and I washed my dads Porsche with rocks.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 You really enjoyed yourself didnt you?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Please! Are you kidding? I-I hurt three huge men, I gave a guy a bloodynoseI mean I-Im not proud of it but, I really am. And its all because ofyou, wonderful, amazing you.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 I think youve got concussion.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 No, no, Im serious. Thank you.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Emily	 Youre welcome.  Imsorry. Did I hurt you?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ross	 Its worth the pain.  Yknow what,you know what? Its not.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Ticket Counter Attendant	  This is the final boarding call forFlight 664 to Yemen.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Well, I-I guess I gotta go.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh, my Bing-a-ling. Ill wait for you. Do you even know how longyoure going to be gone?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Well, just until we find an energy source to replace fuel.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Oh. Well, Ill right you everyday.  15 YemenRoad, Yemen.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Okay, good-bye. Good-bye. 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Chandler?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 No!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 Chandler! 
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Janice! There you are! There you are! I had to have one last kiss, andalso-also you said that you were going to leave right after I got on the plane!
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Janice	 No! No! I wanna see you take-off.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Chandler	 Well, I then guess Im going to Yemen! Im going to Yemen! When we get to Yemen, can I stay with you?
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 All right. The super couldnt figure out what it did. A $200 anhour electrician couldnt figure out what it did. Ive had seven pretty seriousshocks. I officially give up.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Rachel	 Thank God.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Monica	 I guess Joey was right, it does nothing.
04	15	0415	The One With All The Rugby	Phoebe	 See? Im doing it. I am totally doing it.  I lost it.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 What is it hon?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 I-I cant find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makesme nauseous! Im telling you, being pregnant is no piece of cakeooh! Cake! No.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Aww, honey Im sorry.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 God! Ooh! What is that smell? Its coming from the bathroom. Ooh!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Wow! Pregnancy does give you some weird cravings.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Yeah?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Its me. Its Phoebe. Listen theres something in here Iwant to eat, what-what smells so good?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Is it the shampoo? Its guava.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	  No!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Oh! Wait-wait!  Is it my bologna sandwich?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Yes. Yes. Yes. I cant believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe hewants me to eat meat? I cant eat meat!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Oh, wait-wait!  Maybe its a pickle?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 What are you writing?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, Joshuas coming in tomorrow and since I dont have theguts to ask him out, Im going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Oh yeah?  Joshua, give me acall sometime, guys like you  never go out of stylewhat did you throw away?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Hi guys!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Hey!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Hey, what have you guys been up too?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Oh, we went to see a collection of Victorian doorknobs and theCupert-Hewitt museum.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Without me?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be reallyinteresting.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 They were so ornate and beautiful, I mean look at that! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 I dont know how museums work in England but, here, youre notsupposed to take stuff.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 I uh, I got it from the gift shop. They have really lax security there. Its a joke. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Bye. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 Right, Ive got to be off, Ill see ya. Buh-bye then. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Wow! You guys seem to be having a good time.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Oh yeah, shes-shes amazing. And-and shes so much fun.And! Yknow what? When Im with her, Im fun! I even signed up forhelicopter classes.  Shes leaving in two days, I donthave to do it.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Oh no, two days, you must be bummed.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah, shes got to go back to London. But you know what? Ivebeen prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together, andthats it. Yknow.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Hey thats what all my relationships are like.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Yes, but in Rosss case, they both know in two weeksthats it.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Pheebs!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Hey!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	  Hello! Hello!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	  Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby istotally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to makeit think it was getting meat, yknow? And I got nauseous.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Maybe thats because soy-burgers suck!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Hey, but at least you got that cool, pregnant lady glow.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Thats sweat. You throw up all morning, youll have that glowtoo.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	  Okay!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, heres that trench-coat that you wanted.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Oh great!  Wow! Yeah, its comfortable. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yeah?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	  Oh no-no, no-no, they dont want you to put yourhands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Why not?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, thats because of a lot of
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Yknow, they ruin it for everybody.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 I know!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Yknow, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Yeah, it was my first date since the uh, since the divorce.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, congratulations, so do you love her?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 No, no, no, shes nice but, yknow, it just it made me realizethat Im just not, Im just not ready to be dating, yknow?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Huh. Well, uh, thats uh, thats interesting. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	  Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, its just an anti-theft device.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Then uh, whats-whats this? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 You need that, you need that too cause obviously, a thief couldjust tear this up. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oops, sorry. Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! Actually, wehave to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 What are you talking about?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Yeah, what going on?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But itsactually for Joshua.  Look, he said hes not ready todate, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now Ihave the perfect opportunity to seduce him! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Well, as much as Id like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and Iarent going to be here. All right? I mean, shes going to come by first to saygood-bye, and then Ive got a whole special evening planned. So Im sorry, noparty.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Awwww!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	  Hello?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Surprise!!!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler, Joey	 Surprise!! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 No ones ever thrown me a surprise party before!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, it was all Rosss idea.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 Youre so sweet! And Im so surprised!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 You really didnt know?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Uhh, because Im trying to play hard to get. Oh, quick heslooking over here, say something funny.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Like what?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 What-what-what is so funny?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 I said, "Like what?"
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Now thats a thinker.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Okay, yknow what, yknow what? This playing hard to get thingis not working. Umm, hand-hand me those cherries.  Okay. Okay.  Hi!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Hi!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Care for a cherry?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Oh, no thanks.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 No? Yknow, I can tie one of these into a knot using just mytongue. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 You okay?  You all right? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	  So we should probably get going soon.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 Oh, but the partys only just getting started!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah, but we-we have to be at the Four Seasons for drinks in 15minutes and then yknow, then The Plaza for dinner.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 So why did you plan a party at the same time?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 No-no-no, no, umm, actually American surprise parties are-are-are veryshort. Its usually, "Surprise!" And then, "Oh my God, Im sosurprisedgood-bye!"
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 But Ross, Im such having a great time! Your sister has just beentelling me that you used to dress up like little, old ladies and hold make-believe teaparties.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Monica said that did she? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Ooh, yeah. Then what are you going to put on top of that?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 A little salami. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Ooh yeah! Then umm, what goes on top of the salami?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Pastrami. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Oooh, yeah. Youre a genius.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, could somebody give me a hand with this zipper?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Yeah. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Up!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 You changed?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yeah, I did. I needed my lucky dress.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 And lucky means, more cleavage? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Does for me.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Ohh, God! Look at him, hes so cute. I wanna go over there, grabhim, and kiss him! How can I kiss him and not letting him know that I like him?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Oh! I know how you can get him, take off your bra.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 What?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 There was a seen in Footloose...
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Flashdance.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, yeah, with that-that uh, plumber girl
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 She was a welder.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 What? Were you like in the movie, or Anyway, she takes offher bra under her shirt and pulls it out the sleeve. Very sexy, and classy.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Or if you want to kiss him, umm, you could use mistletoe.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Its not Christmas!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Or Spin the Bottle?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Hes not 11!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	  Thank you so much forthis. It was really so thoughtful of you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 What? Youre leaving?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yes, we have something we have to get to.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Uhh, yeah, I think Im going to take-off too.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 No! You guys cant leave yet! You have to stay, we-we got the wholebig thing planned!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 What big thing?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	  So, Spin the Bottle works like this: I spin thebottle, it lands on Gunther, so I would have to kiss Gunther.  All right. Who wants to go first?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 Ill go.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Yay!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Welcome to America. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Two in a row! Youve got to use your tongues now! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yay! Emily! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 What are the odds? What are the odds?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	  Okay, that-thats enough! Yknow, lets,lets let someone else play.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 If you didnt want to play, why did you come to the party?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Okay, my turn!!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Oh my God!! The baby just kicked!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Ohh!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Its okay! Its okay! It kicked once, itll kick again!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Oh my God!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 All right, well, everybody just remember where they were sitting. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Just a bug.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Yknow it doesnt matter how much Im craving it.Yknow why Im never gonna eat meat? Because its murder, cold bloodedmurder.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Okay. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Theres a Phoebe on my sandwich! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Phoebe, what-what are you doing?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 I cant help it. I need the meat. The baby needs the meat.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 All right look, yknow how-yknow how when youre datingsomeone and you dont want to cheat on them, unless its with someone reallyhot?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, totally!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 All right. Okay. Well this is the same kind of deal. If youre goingto do something wrong,  do it right!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Feel better now?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, but at what cost? Six more months, three meals a day, Imgonna eat like, yknow millions of cows.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Hey, what if I said, I could even things out for ya, meatwise.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 What?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Well, I eat a lot of meat right?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Yeah.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Well, suppose until the babys born I laid off it. No extra animalswould die, you-youd just be eating my animals.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Joey, I cant believe you would do that for me.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Absolutely! I could be a vegetarian. Theres no meat in beer, right?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Okay, we could still make dinner if we skipped the appetisers and askedfor our check right away.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Emily	 But, we cant go now. It looks like Rachels gonna put on askit.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Oh my God! Have you lost your mind?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 No-n-n-n-no! I am finally thinking clearly. My lucky dresswasnt working out to well for me, but for four years, this baby never missed.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 Rachel-Rachel-Rachel I-I cannot, I cant let, actuallyI kinda want to see what happens.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Hey!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Hi!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Nice uh, costume.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Ohh, yeah, well I wanted to give Emily a big American good-byecheer. So okay!  Ready! Okay! Gimme an E!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 E!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Gimme an M!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 M!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Gimme an I!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 I!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Gimme an L!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 L!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Gimme a Y!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	All	 Y!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 What do you get?  Emily!!  EmilWhoa!!  Okay! So thats me as a cheerleader! Ta-dum! 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey, Monica	 Are you all right?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Im fine! Im fine! Im just losing a tooth, its nobig deal. I have a dentist! Yknow. Im gonna go put some ice on it. Excuse me. What do I do now? What do I donow?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Monica	 I think youre done.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Okay, time to take off the bra. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Umm, that was really great, but I-I gotta take-off actually.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	  Take the bra off.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 All right, come on, lets go get your coat.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Okay.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Gunther	 Rachel is my girlfriend.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 So, this was uh, really fun.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, yeah! Real fun.  Yknow, this braReally, bothers me.  Yknow, this used to be mybedroom. Yeah. A lot of memories in here, a lot of memories. If these walls couldtalk, yknow what theyd say? Wanna hear some memories? 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Need uh, need a little hand there.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no! No, I got this all under control.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 You really dont seem like you do. Thats
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Ughhhh!! Forget it!  This is, this is nothow this is supposed to happen.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Well, what was supposed to happen?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Can you not look at me when I say this?  I thought thatif I could get you here, I could seduce you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Huh. Oh, boy!  Uhh, I-I dont wear suits towork, and I bought six of them from you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, Im sorry, I thought you needed them!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 No, no-no, no-no, my point is that I kept coming back because, I wantedto see you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Why?!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Because I-I like you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 You like me?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Yeah! I mean youre-youre beautiful and smart andsophisticateda lot of this isnt based on tonight.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yeah but-but-but you liked me! Oh my God, I cant believe this, allthis time, I liked you and you liked me!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 But
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no dont say but! No-no, buts never good! Letsjust leave it at, you like me and I like you.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Okay uh, however
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, now see thats a fancy but.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 My marriage like just ended, and Im really not ready to getinto anything yet.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 But.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Im sorry, I, I just need a little time.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Okay.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Ohh, here you are. I was looking for you before. Joshuas gone soyou and Emily are free to go.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Thats okay. Shes still in there enjoying her fake party anduh, its too late to do any of the things I had planned, so
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, Im sorry. I completely ruined your evening.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, if it makes you feel any better, I made a fool out of myself.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Helps a little.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Is there room on that step for a pathetic loser?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah, have a seat.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Im so sorry.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Thats okay, I mean it was just two-week thing anyway, I justdidnt want it to end this way, yknow?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Well, maybe you didnt want it to end?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 What do you mean?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 You seem to really like her.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreedthat it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends,asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean youdont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 You think?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, andyoure sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Hey, youre right.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Thanks.  What photo album was it?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 I dont know, it was you and a bunch of albino kids.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Ross	 Oh my God! Those werent albino kids, that was computer camp! Rach!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Hey.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Hey.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Youre a pathetic loser, right?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Chandler	 Oh-ho, yeah!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Sit!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Hi. 
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh my gosh, Joshua!
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 All those things I said about not being ready
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Theyre not true?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 No, theyre-theyre all true.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 But
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Oh! Oh, I love that but.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 You wanna go inside and have some coffee?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joshua	 Yeah.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Rachel	 Okay.  Every time.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Oooh, what you got there?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Pastrami.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Oh-ho-ho, yeah! Hey! Yknow what goes good with that?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Hm-mm, corn beef.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Ooh, I was gonna say bologna, but thats much better. How about alittle of that smoked turkey?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	  Oh mama! Uh when-when isthe baby due?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Six months.
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Joey	 Ugh. Now if a cow should die of natural causes, I can have one of thoseright?
04	16	0416	The One With The Fake Party	Phoebe	 Not if I get there first.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Mr. Treeger	 Ohhh, man!!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	  What is that?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Treegers snaking the shower drain.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Mr. Treeger	 What in the name of hell?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Maybe he found you flip-flop.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Hey!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Whoa! Is this porn? What did I do? I mustve hit something on theremote.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Do we pay for this?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 No, we didnt even pay our cable billmaybe this is how theypunish us.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Maybe we shouldnt pay our phone billfree phone sex.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Maybe we shouldnt pay our gas bill? 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Mr. Treeger	  Whoa, hey, that ladys all kindsof naked.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Yeah, Joey just pressed something on the remote and it just, came on!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Mr. Treeger	 Yeah, it happened to me once. I was just flipping through thechannels and bam! It was like finding money.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Like finding money with naked people on it!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Mr. Treeger	 Then I made the mistake of turning off the TV, I never got it backagain. And Im sad. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	  Why would he turn off the TV? 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 All right, yknow what, come on, do we really have to watch thiswhile we eat? 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey, Chandler	  Oh no-no-no-no!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 We dont know what could make this go away.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah, so no one touches the remote. And no one touches the TV!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 And no one touches the air around the TV!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Imagine a protective porn bubble if you will, okay?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Well at least, Im going to mute it.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey, Chandler	 Oh no-no-no! 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 We still have porn.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Hey.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	  Hi!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Hi!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Honey, what are you doing? Thats too heavy.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Yeah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Give it here.  Oh, God. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Okay.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Ohh, Im getting too pregnant for this, lugging around a stupidmassage table. Yknow, I have to find a job where I carrying a smaller table. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Or a job where you dont have to carry a table.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 You mean like a doctor?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Pheebs! Youre blocking the porn! Look out!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Ohh!  Oh my. Oh, that reminds me, I have to see my OB-GYNtoday.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Hi.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Hi.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 So uh, Emily just went to the airport.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Oh. Why didnt you take her?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Eh, her-her uncle already had planned on doing it. And yknow, we-wesaid our good-byes this morning, so
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 You must feel horrible. Hey! The guys have free porn!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	  Nah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Hey, cheer up! Youre gonna see her again, right?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Well I, thats the thing, I dont know! I mean, whenever Ibrought it up with her she said,  "This is so fantastic! Why dowe have to talk about the future? Lets just enjoy"
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	  No-no-no, dont-dont do the accent.Youve got to see her again.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 And why do you care so much?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Because! You could get to live out my fantasy!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 You had fantasies about Emily?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 No! Yknow, the fantasy! Meet someone from a strange land,fall in madly love, and spend the rest of your lives together.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Is that why in junior high you were the only one that hung out with thatUkrainian kid?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Yeah that, plus his mom used to put sour cream on everything!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Ahh.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Do you love her?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 We said it was only going to be two weeks, yknow?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 You love her!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 What-what is love really?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Ohhh, I knew you loved her! Then you need to go to the airportand tell her. Youre probably just gonna catch her just as shes about to go tothe gate. Youre gonna call out her name and say, "I love you!" Andshes gonna say, "I love you, too!" And you guys are going to have the mostamazing kiss, everyone at the gate will applaud.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 I am a good kisser.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Then you two can, can sneak into the cockpit, and things will start toheat up, and then a stewardess comes in  Ive been watchingtoo much porn.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Is that the heartbeat?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 Thats it.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Oh wow! This is so cool.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 Have we talked about the possibility of multiple births?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Why dont take care of this one, and should I get pregnant again,Ill hold onto your card, okay?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 No, Im getting three separate heartbeats.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Three? You guys were worried I wouldnt even have one!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 Doctors are wrong all the time.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Well, yeah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, so, are-are you sure that there are three?!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 Definitely. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!! So I-I mean so in a few monthsIm going to have three full grown babies just walkin around inside me?! Oh!Oh! And its gonna be one of those log rides where they just come shooting out!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	The Doctor	 Actually, giving birth to three babies isnt that differentfrom giving birth to one.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 What do you know?!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	  Oh-oh, Phoebe!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Ooh! Hi!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 Hi!  So, how did it go atthe doctors?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh well, okay, hey, yknow how when youre umm, yourewalking down the street and you see three people in a row, and you say, "Oh,thats nice?"
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 Yes.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Okay, yeah well, good news, youre going to have three babies.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 Three babies?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 I finally got my band!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 Were gonna have a big family, Ive always wanted a big family!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh God, Im so glad you guys are happy, I was so afraid you weregoing to be all freaked.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 Why would we be freaked?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No, no maybe cause its harder to raise them, and the addedexpense, and
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	  Oh.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 Right.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No, back to happy. Back to happy!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 No-no-no, no, its going to be fine. Because umm, because I teachHome Ec, and uh, I can have 30 kids making baby clothes all year long. Yknowitll-itll be like my very own little sweatshop. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 Yeah, Ive been thinking ever since you said we were havingtriplets, the best thing for me to do is to drop out of college and get a job.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 No, Frank.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No you cant quit college! No! Youre in college? Really?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 Yeah, refrigerator college.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Alice	 Yeah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 Yeah, yknow when we found out we were going to have a baby,yknow I figured yknow like I should yknow have like a careerand Ilove refrigerators!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 You cant give up on your dream.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Frank	 No, its okay. Were-were gonna have three kids! Andthats-thats a different kind of dream. Three kids and no money.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ticket Agent	  This is the boarding call for Flight 009.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Emily! 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Oh my God! What are you doing here? 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 I just, I had to see you one more time before you took-off.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 You are so sweet. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Thats, thats, thats a big candy bar.  I had the most amazing time with you.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Me too.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ticket Agent	 This is the final boarding call for Flight 009.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Well, that me.  Here, have this.  Im only allowed one piece of carryon anyway. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	  Wait uh, listen. I-I, I have to tell you something. Umm,Ive been thinking, Im just gonna come out and say it. Okay? I-I-I ah, I-Ithink I love you.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Oh.  Thank you. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Thats no problem.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Whats that song? It has been in my head all day long.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Its the theme from Good Will Humping.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Yknow who doesnt even like dirty movies? My new boyfriendJoshua.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah right.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 No, he told me. He prefers to leave certain things to the imagination.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Oh-oh, yeah, and did he also say that ah, some of the dialogue wascorny and that he actually found it was funny and not sexy?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Yes!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah, he likes porn.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Where ya going?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Im going to find out if he really thinks supermodels are tooskinny.  Hey, Pheebs!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Hey.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Hey!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 How did it go with Frank and Alice?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Well, Frank has to quit college because his super fertile sister ishaving three babies! I need to make a lot of money really fast, and I had an idea that Iwant to talk to you  about, cause you work for a big company.Okay, insider trading, what information is there that you can give me.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 They dont really talk to us about that kind of stuff. I can getyou some free white out though.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Ohh! Did you do what I said? Did-did-did you tell her?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 I did.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 And well, what did she say?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Thank you.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Oh, youre totally welcome! Whatd she say?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 She said, "Thank you." I said, "I love you." And shesaid, "Thank you."
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Whoa-whoa, wait a minute, did you say, you love her?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah, what were you trying to get her to do?!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 What do I do now?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 You play hard to get.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 She already lives in London.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Then you go to Tokyo.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 All right look, forget it, forget it. You told her you love her,its over.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 It is not over! Youre over!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 What?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 You know!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Okay.  Good one.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 It is not over because she is going to call you and tell you she lovesyou. And the reason why she couldnt, is because her feelings were so strong, itscared her. Now you go home and wait for her call, she could be calling you from theplane! Come on now go! Go! 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Okay! Okay! But if she doesnt call, it is definitely over! No, wait.Wait. Unless, eventually, I call her, yknow just to she whats going on, and,and she says shell call me back, but then she doesnt. Then itsover.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Way to be strong, man!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Hey!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Hi! Listen, can we watch cartoons on your television? We need a pornbreak. We spent the last two hours watching In & Out & In, Again.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, so, why dont you just turn it off?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Because then we would be the guys who turned off free porn.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	  Ooh, good, youre hear! Okay.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Hey!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Hi!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, what-what cha got there?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh this, well Im glad you asked.  Now, dont you hate it when you have to cut a tin can with anordinary steak knife?  Ahh! Now, I know what yourethinking
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Pregnant Woman Slays Four?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Phoebe, they didnt make you pay for those knives, did they?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Are you sure?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Honey, youre not gonna make enough money to help Frank and Alicejust by selling knives.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No-no, I know that, but I just have to make enough money for the secondpart of my plan.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Whats the second part of your plan?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 My Saturn dealership.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	  Hello?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Ross.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Emily, hi! Uh, how-how was you flight?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 It was dreadful. I felt terrible about how I acted when you said thosewonderful things.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 No, no, that-that, thats all right. Umm, Im just glad youcalled.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Ross umm, theres something that Ive got to tell you,theres-theres someone else.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Does that mean the same thing in England as it does in America?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 She doesnt know which one of us she wants, me or this Colin guy.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 This isnt how its supposed to go, there cant beanother guy.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Well
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Of course theres another guy!! This is even more perfect! Now youhave to prove your love!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Im not proving anything. Okay, Im done listening to you. If Ihadnt let you talk me into going to the airport in the first place, I neverwouldve put my fist through the wall!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 You put your fist through the wall?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 No, I missed and hit the door. But, it opened really hard!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 You have to go to London!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 What?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Yeah, you have to go fight for her!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Oh yeah, sure, that makes sense. Yeah. Cause you already told heryou love her and she didnt say it back, then she called you and told you thattheres another guy, so yeah, go to London thatll scare her!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 When Rachel was with Paulo, what did you do?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 I made fun of his accent.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 You sat back and let him have her, you didnt fight at all. Am Iright? Do you want the same thing to happen with Emily?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 No.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 All right then, go fight for her! Go to London! I mean, that could beyou and Emily!  That, but-but nicer. Just, go to London!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Really?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Come on! Surprise her! Show up at her doorstep! Dont let her gowithout a fight!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 All right. All right, Im gonna do it! 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 All right.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Im gonna, Im gonna go to London and Im going to fightfor her.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Okay, good luck!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Ross! Ross! If youre going to the airport, could you pick me upanother one of those Toblerone bars? 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Hey!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Ooh-Ooh! I did it! I did it! I figured out a way to make money! Imgonna open up my own massage place and Franks gonna help me! And! We can work itaround his schedule so he doesnt have to quit school!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Thats sounds great, but how are you going to afford it?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, we were walking down the street and we saw that van that you guysused for catering and we realised
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Im telling it! Im telling it!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Okay.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Okay. You know how people need transportation, but they also needmassages to help them relax so I just figured we could combine the two, okay, I give themassages and Frank drives! I can fix up the van, bolt the table in the back, and you knowwhat Ive got?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 A place where no one will ever get out alive?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 No! Think about it, its a taxi that people take when they need torelax, its
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	  Relaxi-Taxi!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 The name was my favourite part!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, well I can up with it!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 YOU DID NOT!!!! Oh! No! You came up with Relaxi Cab! Thatsnot good.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Well, I
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Hello.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	  Hey.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Oh my God! Ross, are you in England? Was Emily surprised?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 No, because she hasnt come home yet. And she hasnt been homeall night! Shes obviously staying with that other guy, and Im the stupid moronwho spent the whole night outside her apartment!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 All right. When is, when is the next flight out?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 About four hours.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Okay, just stay there a couple more hours and if she doesnt showup by then, then just come on home.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Hey, tell him about Relaxi-Taxi, and-and ask him if he thinksthats better than Relaxi Cab.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Rachel	 Okay, its not Relaxi Cab. Its Relaxicab, like taxicab. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Phoebe	 Oh, that is better.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Are we in London?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 What are you doing here? You cant be here!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Ive uh, Ive come to talk to Ross.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 What?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	  Nothing. No, nothing.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 I was going to call him, but
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Oh, you came to tell him you love him! I knew it!  Iwas right!  Im right, right?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Id really rather talk to him. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Monica	 Oh.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 I uh, Ive been to his apartment and he wasnt there, and uh. Ineed to talk to him, so do you have any idea where he is?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Ross, are you there? Ross, I dont know if you can hear thisbut  Imgonna talk anyway, uh, Im in the States with you sister and your friends andits all over with Colin. I came here to tell you that, and to tell youYes,Joey you can have all the chocolate you want, just take it! Uh, I came here to tell youthat I love you.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	  I love you too! Im, Im gonna call you right now from thephone booth!  You cant hear me. 
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 I wish I could know if youd heard any of that. I suppose Iveeither just told you I love you or given my neighbours a good laugh. Mrs. Newman ifyoure listening, bugger off this in none of your business. I suppose theresnot much chance you did heard that, and theres the call waiting so, I should go. Ohwell.  Hello.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Hi.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Emily	 Ross, I love you!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Ross	 Ohh! Thank you.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Hey.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Hey.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 I was just at the bank, and there was this really hot teller, and shedidnt ask me to go do it with her in the vault.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Same kind of thing happened to me! Woman pizza delivery guy come over,gives me the pizza, takes the money, and leaves!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 What, no, "Nice apartment, I bet the bedrooms are huge?"
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Noo! Nothing!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Yknow what, we have to turn off the porn.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 I think youre right.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 All right, ready?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 One.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Two.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Both	 Three.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Thats kinda nice.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 You wanna see if we still have it?
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah.
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 FREE PORN!!!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Joey	 Yeah!!
04	17	0417	The One With The Free Porn	Chandler	 We have free porn here!!!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hey! Wow, it is true what they say, pregnant bellies look likea drum.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	  Ha-ha.  No, its justIm so pregnant that Imy guitar doesnt fit anymore. So I thoughttil Im not, Im just gonna play all my songs on this drum. It sounds reallycool!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 All right.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Listen. Listen.  Smelly cat, smellycat, what are they feeding you? 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Wow, Pheebs! That sounds great!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 I know! I know, and Ive only been playing for like an hour!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Alice	  Phoebe! Phoebe! Hi! Hi!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Hey! What are you doing here?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Alice	 Umm, actually, I came down to ask you a big favour.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Oh, well, dont tell me you want to keep more of your stuff in myuterus.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Alice	  No. No. No.  Okay, now, see, I wanna name the girlbaby Leslie, and Frank wants to name one of the boy babies Frank JR. JR. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Wouldnt that be Frank the III?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Alice	 Dont get me started.  Anyway, umm, since there are threebabies and umm, we both got to put our names in, we would be truly honoured if you namedthe other boy baby.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Wow! Thats so great! Oh! Oh! Cougar.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Alice	 You think about it. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 I left a bra drying on the shower rod, you dont think your son willthink its yours and be horribly traumatised? 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Hey, if mommy can have a wife, daddy can have a bra.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	  Ohh, its time to go.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Oh, no-no-no, see, that-that clocks a little fast, uh, we have 17minutes. Huh, what can we do in 17 minutes? Twice?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Well thats ambitious.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Hey, uh, you can ignore that.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Thats Carol with your son!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Uhh, believe me when hes older, hell understand.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	  Ross!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Ill be right there.   Hello!  Hello!  Hey. Uhh, Emily, this isCarol and Susan.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 Hey, its so nice to finally meet you!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Me too!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Ohh, yknow, Susans gonna be shooting a commercial in Londonnext week.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 Oh yeah, Im so excited, Ive never been there.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Oh, well, Ill show you around.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 That would be great! Also, uh, I was hoping to catch a show so if you canmake any suggestions
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Oh, theres tonnes of terrific stuffIll go with you!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 Ahh!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Look at you two, bonding, making us late for the airport so
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Are you all right?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 Oh, hes fine. Hes fine. Its just that us getting alongis difficult for him, because he doesnt like me.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Oh come on! Thats-thats true.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Hi!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hey! Do we have a baby name yet?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Ugh! No! This is so hard! I went through this whole book  and found nothing! I want a name thats really like, yknow strong andconfident, yknow? Like-like Exxon. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Well, it certainly worked for that Valdez kid.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Ooh-ooh, Pheebs, you want a strong name? How about, The Hulk?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 No, Im-Im not sure about Hulk, but I like the idea of a namestarting with "The."
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Oh, want a good name, go with Joey. Joeys your pal. Joeys yourbuddy. "Where is everybody?" "Well, theyre hanging out withJoey."
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hey, yknow what, if youre gonna do that, if youregonna name him Joey, you should name him Chandler.  Oh,come on! Chandlers funny, sophisticated, and hes very loveable, once you getto know him.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Oh well, hey, Joeys loveable too! But the thing about Joey is, ifyou need him, hell be there.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Well, Chandler will be there for you too. I mean, well, he might be alittle late, but-but, hell be there. And hell bring you some cold soda, ifwant you need him for is that youre really hot.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 What do ya say? What do ya say?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Well, I, I like the idea of naming him after someone I love, and Joeyand Chandler are great names.  But, all right, Idontmaybe Ill just name him The Hulk.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 I knew I shouldnt have mentioned it! Thats what I wanted toname my kid!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Hey, Mon, if you were hoping to sleep with Joshua the first timetonight, which one of these would you want to be wearing. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Yknow what? It really creeps me out choosing otherpeoples sex clothes.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Sorry. Im so exited! Ive been waiting for this for months! Igot my hair coloured! I got new sheets! Im making him a very fancy meal. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Um-hmm.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 What am I making him by the way?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Well, youre making him a frieze salad with goat cheese and pinenuts, wild nuts, wild rice, roast asparagus, and salmon au croup.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 I thought I was making him filet mignon? 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Yeah, you were, but you decided to make salmon because you had some leftover at the restaurant. And then you realised if you  bitched about it,then you  would stop cooking, and you  would have tomake your famous baked potato and Diet Coke.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Wow, I really get crabby when I cook.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 So uh, Emily called last night
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 And now youre giving me the message!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Turns out them Emily is just crazy about Susan. Yeah, theyregoing to the theatre together! Theyre going to dinner! Theyre going horsebackriding!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 God, Susan is so fun!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Look, this is just a little too familiar, okay? For like, for like sixmonths before Carol and I spilt up, all I heard was: "My friend Susan is so smart. Myfriend Susan is so funny. My friend Susan is so great."
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 You actually think that something can happen between Emily and Susan?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Hey, theyre going to the gym together! Two women! Stretching!Yknow they-they take a steam together! Things get a little playfuldidntyou see Personal Best?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 No, but Im gonna!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hi! Hi! Youre crazy! Okay? This is Emily. Emily is straight.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 How do you know? I mean we thought Carol was straight before I marriedher!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah, I definitely. I dont like the name Ross.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 What a weird way to kick me when Im down.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 No! No! I-I meant for the baby!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Oh. Whats wrong with Ross?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Well, its just yknow that something like this would never tolike The Hulk, yknow
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Actually that-thats not true, in The Incredible Hulk uh, No.72, Dr. Bruce Banner found  Yknow,ugh, nevermind, my girlfriends a lesbian. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 So, I decided Im definitely going to go with either Joey orChandler.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Oh! Oh-oh, you gotta pick Joey! I mean, name one famous person namedChandler.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Raymond Chandler.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Someone you didnt make up!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay, there are no famous Joeys. Except for, huh, JoeyButtafucco.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Yeah, that guy really hurt us.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Well, how about a compromise then, okay? What if its likeyknow, Chanoey?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay, look, Joey! Come on, think about it, first of all, hellnever be President. Theres never gonna be a President Joey.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 All right look man, I didnt want to bring this up, but Chandler, isthe stupidest name I ever heard in my life! Its not even a name; its barelyeven a word. Okay? Its kinda like chandelier, but its not! All right?Its a stupid, stupid non-name!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Wow, youre, youre right. I have a horrible, horrible name.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Im sorry man, I didntIm-Im sorry. Imsorry.  
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 So I guess its Joey then!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 This is so nice. Thank you for doing this.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Ohh, please! Cooking soothes me.  Ahh. So, dig in!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Great! Oh, it all looks sooo good!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	  Hmmm!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Oh my God!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Oh I know, my God, this is sothis rice is soI am so good.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Behind you?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	  Oh, yeah, Im sorry. They used tolive here; sometimes they migrate back over.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	  Is there ah, is there some waythey can not be here. Its just ah, farm birds really kinda freak me out!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Yeah, sure, okay. Okay.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	  Hey, how did you do that?! Come on in. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 All gone! So, farm birds, huh?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Yeah, its-its my only weird thing, I swear. And I-I-Iwouldve told you about it, but I didnt know they would be here.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Oh.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 So, all right.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Okay. So, can I serve you a little ofWhat? What? What? 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Nothing I uh, its just that I know that theyre still outthere.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 But, theyre across the hall! I mean thats two doors away, itwould take them a long time to peck their way back over here.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Okay, thats-thats not funny. Uhh.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Okay, yknow, would you feel better if we went someplace else? Imean we could pack all this stuff up and yknow go to your apartment.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Oh, theyre working on this week, its a total mess. But uh,Im staying at my parents house, we could go there.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Your parents?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Yeah, theyre out of town.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Ohh.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Yeah-yeah, its this huge place, and-and its got thisgorgeous view of the park, and very, very romantic. What do you say?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Yeah that works.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 They-they-they can smell fear.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	  Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Hey! Hows Ben?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Well, I asked him if he wanted to eat, he said, "No." I askedhim if he wanted to sleep, he said, "No." I asked him what he wanted to do, hesaid, "No." So, hes sweeping. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Hey, Ben! Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 So umm, any word from Susan?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Ooh, yeah! She said shes having sooo much fun with Emily.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh, by the by, did it uh, did it ever occur to you that, Idont know, maybe they might be having a little too much fun?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Whats too much fun?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Yknow, the kind of fun, you and Susan had when we were married.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Oh my God, you are so paranoid! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Am I?!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Yes!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Am I?!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 I cant speak for Emily, but Susan is in a loving, committedrelationship.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Uh-huh, Carol, so were we. All right, just-just imagine for a moment,Susan meets someone and-and they really hit it off. Yknow? Say-say theyrecoming back from the theatre, and they-they stop at a pub for a couple of drinks,theyre laughing, yknow, someone innocently touches someone elseTheres electricity, its new. Its exciting. Are you telling me thereisnt even the slightest possibility of something happening?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 Maybe.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 OH MY GOD!! I didnt really believe it until you just said it!!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 and even though none of the other kids believed me, I swear toGod, that duck pushed me!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Wow! This place is fabulous!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Yeah, yeah, let me show you around. This is the uh, downstairs livingroom.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Whoa-whoa, theres two living rooms? God, growing up here, thisplace mustve been a real babe magnet.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Yeah, well, it wouldve been, but uh, my parents just moved here.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Ohh, you should know, this place is a real babe magnet. Wanna make out?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Hey, heres an idea. Why dont uh, I put the food in thefridge and we can eat it later?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 That sounds like a plan. Umm, is there a place I can go freshen up?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Oh yeah, yeah uh, its down the hall and uh, second door to yourleft.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Ah.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mrs. Burgin	 Oh, hi, darling!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Mom, Dad, what are you guys doing here?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mrs. Burgin	 Oh, well we cut the trip short.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 France sucks!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Umm, this may be a little weird, but I-I-I got a date here.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mrs. Burgin	 Oh, say no more!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 Well just grab some food and take it with us right upstairs,and well be right out of you hair.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Oh, that-that would be great. So you didnt even get to Italy?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 Yep, sucks!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Hi you!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Oh my God!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 I know, I can do more than cook.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 I like her. She sees smart.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 Uhh, Rachel, my parents
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Ohh! Its so nice to meet you.  Hello. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 Hi.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Hello.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mrs. Burgin	 Hello. Well, Joshua, that $500 was for groceries.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 What? This-this, no, oh no, no-no-no, this isnotthats-thats not what it is. See, see, okay, I work in fashion, seeand-and, this is a real dress actually. Its-its, theyre-theyrewearing it in Milan, so part of my job is too wear the clothes, and then I see how peoplerespond, and then I report back to my superiors at Bloomingdales, soAnd obviously in uh, in-in this case,  I am going to reportback, "USA not ready."
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mrs. Burgin	 Maybe in L.A?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Yes!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joshua	 There you go.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 So, have you kids eaten yet?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Well, we were going to do that afterI mean umm, next.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 Well, were starving, why dont we all go get something toeat?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, well Yeah, no use wasting this baby, just lyinaround the house. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 So We go eat.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Yes.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Mr. Burgin	 Youll wear that. Well be eating, and of course,youll be wearing that.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Dude, I am sorry about what I said!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 No, no, youre right, it is a ridiculous name!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Its not that bad.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Yes it is! From now on, I have no first name.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 So, youre just Bing?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 I have no name.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 All right, so, what are we supposed to call you?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay uh, for now, temporarily, you can call me, Clint.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 No way are you cool enough to pull of Clint.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay, so what name am I cool enough to pull off?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Umm, Gene.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Its Clint. Its Clint! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 See you later, Gene.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Bye, Gene.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Its Clint! Clint!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Whats up with Gene?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 So, you wore your nightie to dinner?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Oh, yeah. And uh, the best part though, when the uh, waiter spilledwater down my back, I jumped up, and my boob popped out.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Oh, no!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 No, its all right. I got nice boobs. 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	  So, I just picked up a message from Emily, sheand Susan are going to a poetry reading together! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 So?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 So! Poetry? Susans gay! Theyre being gay together!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Emilys straight.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Oh, wake up!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Wow, Carol really messed you up!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Excuse me?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah, she turned you into this-this-this untrusting, crazy, jealous,sycophant.  All right, so I dont know what sycophant means,but the rest is right.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Look, I dont know what youre talking about, I am not a crazy,jealous person.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Huh.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 What?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Shes totally right! When we were together, you got all freaked outabout Mark and there was nothing going on.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 This totally makes sense!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 It does not!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Oh, sure it does! In high school, you werent jealous at all eventhough all your girlfriends were cheating on you!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 All right, all right, so up until 92-93 he was very trusting, then94 hit, Carol left him and bamn! Paranoid city!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Absolutely! Absolutely!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 This is so much fun!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 This is not fun!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Monica	 Look, all were trying to say is, dont let what happened withCarol ruin what you got with Emily.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah. The 92 Ross wouldnt.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Well, I still think I was right about that whole Mark thing.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Rachel	 Whatyeahwhat, yknow what? I hope Emily is alesbian.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Drum roll.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	  Okay. Okay. All right. Help! Am I a Mark, or a John?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Nah, youre not tall enough to be a Mark, but you might make a goodBarney.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 All right look, am I serious, okay? Tomorrow at 3:30 I am going downto the courthouse.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Youre actually going through with this?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Hey, look, this name has been holding me back my entire life. Okay,its probably why kids picked on me in school, and why I never do well withwomen So, as of 4 oclock tomorrow, Im either gonna be Mark Johnson orJohn Markson.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 You got problems because of you! Not your name! All right, this has gotto stop! Chandler is a great name! In factyes,  Im, Im sorry. Iknow you really wanted me to name the baby Joey, but eh, so, Im-Im, Imgonna, Im gonna name the baby Chandler.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	  Really?!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah, but you have to keep the name too!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay. Thanks.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Okay!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 You wanna hug it out?
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yay! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Yay! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Yayohyay! Okay, I gotta go tell Frank and Alice! Right now!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Okay!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Ooh, uh 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Bye, Pheebs!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Phoebe	 Okay, bye! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Chandler	 Ha! Ha! Ha!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Joey	 Ohh! 
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Nice luggage.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Carol	 I was gonna say
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	 Hey!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Hi!
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Hey! I missed you.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	 Oh, I missed you too.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Susan	  Thanks for everything, I had such a great time.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Emily	 Oh, so did I.
04	18	0418	The One With Rachel's New Dress	Ross	  No tongue. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	  Mornings here! Sunshine is here! The skyis clear, the mornings here! The mornings here!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 HEY!! Do you have to do that? Its Saturday!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	 Oh come on! Mornings here! Mornings here! The morning is here! Sunshine is here!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 I hate this apartment! I hate the color of these walls! I hatethe fact that this place still smells like bird! I hate that singing guy!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Are you kidding? I love that guy!  Mornings here!Morning is here
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Stop it! I will kill you. I hate the fact that my room is so small.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Hey, I have all the space I need. Just do what I did.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Monica, you dont even have a bed, you sleep in a ball on thefloor!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Yknow what? I am really tired of your bellyaching! Okay,I-I worked really hard at making this a nice place for us to live!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Im sorry. Im so sorry.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Okay.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 See, this is a great apartment.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Shut up! This place is a hole!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Oh, blimey, I still cant believe youve got an earring!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Huh? I know, I know. Who am I? David Bowe? 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 He does that?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Uh, I dont know, whatever.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I think it makes you look really dangerous.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Oh, I know. Yknow what, I never wouldve gotten this if itwerent for you. No really, when Im with you Im-Im like this wholeother guy, I love that guy! I mean, I love you too, a lot, but that guy! I-I lovethat guy!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I love both of you!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I wish I didnt have to go.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Then dont. Stay here. Just dont go so soon to London, just onemore day.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Ohh, Ross, please!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 One more day, seriously/
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Dont do this to me, again. Youd know Id stay here in aminute, but Id really miss so much work, theyll fire me.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 So, then you can stay as long as you want.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I wish I could.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Oh no. Dont, dont, dont start packing. Come on! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I dont think you understand packing. Look, I just dont wantto leave it to the last minute. Last time I left in such a rush, I left my knickers here.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah, I know, I uh, I tried them on.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 You didnt!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 No. No, I didnt. I didnt want to be that guy.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	  Hello!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Ho! Ho! Ho!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Excuse me.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Your pants!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah! You like em? I just, I went to a used clothes store andgot a bunch of maternity stuff. These are sooo comfortable!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Uhh, Pheebs, those are uh, those are Santa pants.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 What?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Santa pants.  Santa Clausspants.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Nuh-uh! Theyre maternity pants. They even came with a list of babynames.  See, these names are good, and these names are bad. Ohh.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	  Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	  Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 SoHey, Pheebs! So, how are the elves?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 I dont know! How are the-the-the-the, yknowYoureclothes arent funny.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Hey, guys, what-what should I wear to a Knicks game?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Uhh, a T-shirt that says, "I dont belong here."
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 You have Knicks tickets?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Yeah, my mom got my dads season tickets in the divorce, so shejust gave them to me.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Yeah, apparently, theyre pretty good seats.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	  Oh my God! Those are almost right on the floor!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Do you guys want these?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yeah!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Yeah we do!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Ohh, well you got em.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Both	 All right!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Just give us our apartment back!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Boy! I didnt see that coming!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Are you serious?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Oh, come on! We know what these are worth.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Yeah, what, do you think were stupid?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Youre not stupid. Youre meaner than I thought.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 What do you say?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Forget it! Okay, Im not giving up my bachelor pad for somebasketball seats!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Youre bachelor pad?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Have you even had a girl up here?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 No. But uh, Joey has, and I usually talk to them in the morning time.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yeah, you do!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Come on!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	  Yes, Gunther, can I get two cups of chino, please?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Gunther	 Good one.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Come on, season tickets! Season tickets, do you know what that means?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Forget it! Okay, Im not giving up the apartment.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Oh comelook, when I was a kid my dads company gave seasontickets to the number one salesman every year, all right? My dad never won! Ofcourse, he wasnt in the sales division, but still, I never ever, ever forgot that!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	  Hey, guys! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Oh my God!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 We dont make enough fun of you already?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Oh yeah, Emily convinced me to do it.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 You do know that Wham broke up?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I like it, and Emily likes it, and thats what counts. So uh, how areyou guys doing?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Oh-no, dont try and talk all normal with that thing in your ear.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Where is Emily?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Ugh, shes saying good-bye to her uncle.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Man, didnt she like just get here?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah!! Yeah!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Easy tiger.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I just, I hate this so much! I mean, every time I go pick her up at theairport, its-its so great. But at the same time Im thinking, "Well,Im gonna be right back there in a couple of days, dropping her off."
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 So what are you going to do?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Nothing! Theres nothing to do! I mean, she lives there, I live here.I mean, she-shed have to uh, move here. She should move here!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 What?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I could ask her to live with me!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Are you serious?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I mean, why not! I mean, I mean why not?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Because youve only known her for six weeks! Okay, Ive gota carton of milk in my fridge Ive had a longer relationship with!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Look guys, when Im with her its-its-its like shebrings this-this-this great side out of me. I mean I-I-I love her, yknow?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 And I love the milk! But, Im not gonna some British girl to movein with me!  Joey, you say things now.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 All right look, Ross, hes right. Emilys great, shesgreat! But this way too soon, youre only gonna scare her!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I dont want to do that.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 No! You dont want to wreck it, you dont want to go to fast!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah, no, youre right, I know, youre right, Im not,Im not gonna do it. All right, thanks guys. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Okay, no problem, just remember to wake us up before you go-go.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Thats too hard. Too hard!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	  All right boys, last chance for the tickets!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Or Ill give them to my new boyfriend, Joshua.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 No thank you.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Wait-wait-wait-wait!  Come on! Come on, lets trade! Thetimings perfect, I just clogged the toilet! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Look, I want those basketball seats as much as you do! Okay, but wecant leave in the small apartment after weve lived here! Didnt you everread Flowers for Algernon?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yes! Didnt you ever read Sports Illustrated?! No! Ididnt read yours! But come on, we can go to the game tonight!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Look, the only way I will even consider this is if they offer a lotmore than just season seats.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Its the Knicks!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Screw the Knicks!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Whoa!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 I didnt mean that. I just meant that the apartment is worth somuch more.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Huh.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 And the Knicks rule all.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yeah, the Knicks rule all!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Hey, so? Are you gonna do it?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 No. No. Were not gonna do that, yknow why? Because its notan even trade.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 All right, okay, look, what if you could keep the apartment and get thetickets?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Done!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Let me finish. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Oh. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Im talking about a bet, winner takes all.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Ooh, we could end up with nothing.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Or you could end up with everything.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Ooh, I like that.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 All right, so what do you say?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 No!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Oh, just do it!!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Op, op, Im convinced!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Come on man, you know Id do it for you! Because, youre my bestfriend.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 All right, but you cant use that again for a whole year.Im in.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 All right!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Ooh, this is so exciting! Ooh, God, what are you going to bet?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Oh, okay, well, I think we should let Phoebe decide, because shesthe only whos impartial, and shes so pretty.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Okay. Umm, ooh, oohoh, I have a game!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Okay! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Okay!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 This is great!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Whats the game?! Whats the game?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Oh, well, it doesnt have a nameoh, okay, Phoebeball! No, itdoesnt have a name. Umm, okay, Monica, what is your favourite thing about trees?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Theyre green?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Good! Good! Five points!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 All right, Joey, same question.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Uhh, theyre tall.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Ooh, three points. Both fine answers, but we were looking for leafy,leafy.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Thats not even a game!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 What? Shut up! Were winning!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 You wanna finish this right now? All right, we get a deck of cards, highcard wins. What do you say?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Fine, lets do it.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Oh, I have cards!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Oh.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Oh, good.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Yeah! Here!  Oh no, these are thetrick deck. Okay. Here yes. Okay.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Okay, you guys uh, you guys pick first
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Okay.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Okay.  Four.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Thats a low one!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yeah! Okay.  Phoebe, you look, I cant.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 What make you think I can?! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Okay. Okay.  Ace!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Why are you screaming and hugging?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Because we won our apartment back!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 What? Ace is high! Jack, queen, king, ace!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 No! Ace is low! Ace, two, three, four!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 I dont know. Ooh! Ooh! Look it! Ah-ha!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 All right, cut, lets pick again, pick again.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Okay.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Come on apartment! Come on apartment!  Oh! I know queenis high!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Uh-huh, not as high as It worked! King!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Yeah baby!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 But, we pick again! We pick again!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Why?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 I dont know!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Tickets please!  Thats courtsidebaby!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Seriously, good game though. Good game.   What are they so mad about? They get the apartmentback!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 No they didnt!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I packed while you were gone. I left some knickers under your pillow.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	  Move in with me.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 What?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Dont be scared, I-I know it sounds crazy and-and people will sayits too soon, but just-just think, think how great it will be.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Ohh, no. Ugh. Oh, leaving London, my whole family lives there.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 I know.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 My job!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Well, so, you-youll get a job here! I mean, Im always hearingabout uh, them foreigners coming in here and stealing American jobs; that could be you!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Yeah, but it-it-its my whole lifeyou come to England.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 No, I cant. I would, I really would, but my son is here; Icant leave him. Isntyou dont think theres any way?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Ohh, I dont think so. I mean it would be different if it was wayinto the future and-and-and we were getting married or something.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 What?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Oh no, no, right I shouldnt have said married. Uh, pleasedont go freaky on me. I didnt mean it. Well, I didnt say it; I take itback!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 No, no, dont. Why dont we?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Why dont we what?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Get married.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 You are mad!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 No! No! Im not! Its-its-its perfect! I meanits better than you just-just moving here, cause its us togetherforever, and thats-thats what I want.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Weve only known each other for six weeks!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah, I know, so what? I mean, whos-whos to say? Does that mewe-we cant do it? Look, huh, I was with Carol for four years before we got marriedand I wound up divorced from a pregnant lesbian. I mean, this, this makes sense for us.Come on! I mean, on our first date we ended up spending the whole weekend in Vermont! Imean, last night I got my ear pierced! Me! This feels right. Doesnt it?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 My parents are going to be really mad.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Is thatare you saying yes? Is that yes?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Yes.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Yes!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yes! Were getting married?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Oh my God! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yes!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Were getting married!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Come here, come here. Uh,  ow! Emily, will youmarry me?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Yes.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Ohh, its a bit small.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Damn! I thought that was going to be romantic as hell!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 It was.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Those were like the best seats ever.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Oh yeah. Hey! Should we give these shirts to the girls? Yknow, kindalike a peace offering.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Oh yeah, thats very nice. Plus, yknow they were free andtheyre too small.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Oh. Oh, God! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Hey, want a beer?  WHOA!!!!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 I KNOW!!!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Open up! Open up! Open up!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Well discuss it, in the morning! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 What the hell is going on?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 We took our apartment back!! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	  I had nothing to do with it.  Okay, it was my idea, but I dont feel good about it.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 We are switching back, right now!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 No, were not! Were not leaving!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Well, youre gonna have to leave sometime, because you both havejobs, and as soon as you do, were switching it back! Theres nothing you can doto stop us! Right, Joe?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 I dont know.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 What?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 I dont want to move again! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 I dont care, this is our apartment! And they stoleyoustole itour apartment, and we won that apartment fair and square, twice! And I amgetting it back right now. Im getting back right now!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 All right. We figured you might respond this way, so we have a backupoffer.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, no more offers. You cant offer anything to us!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Let us keep the apartment and
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 As a thank you, Rachel and I will kiss for one minute.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Totally worth it!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 That was one good minute!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Good night.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Good night.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Men are such idiots.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Yeah! Can you believe that something that stupid actually got us ourapartment back?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Thats so funny to think if youd just done that right afterthe last contest, no one would have had to move at all.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 Yeah, let-let-lets pretend thats not true.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Okay, scarfs done. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Come on! Come on. Come on.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Okay!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Hey!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 What-whats going on?
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Ross has some big thing to tell everyone.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Uhh, okay, its uh, Emily and I, we decided to uh, to get married.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Phoebe	 What? Oh, are you pregnant too?!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 Umm, no.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	 When, when didhow, how did you
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 We, we just decided to uh, to go for it.
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Emily	 I mean, we know its a bit hasty but, uh, it just feels so right,so
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	  Umm, uh, I was just telling the guys
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Rachel	 Yeah, I-I heard.  I think its great!  Ohh, Im so happy foryou!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Chandler	 Oh, well, thats great!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Monica	  I cant believe youre getting married! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Monica and Rachel made out. 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	  Mornings here! The mornings here! 
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Both	 Sunshine is here! The sky is clear, the mornings here!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	 Hey! Youre back!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	 Hey!  Get into gear!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	  Breakfast is near!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Both	 The dark of night has disappeared!!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	The Singing Man	 Ill see you tomorrow morning!
04	19	0419	The One With All The Haste	Joey	  Okay!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Are you kidding me?! Joey. Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey! Joey!Joey! Joey!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey! Joey!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Oh. Oh, did-did-did I wake you?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Gunther, can I get another cup of coffee, please?  So uh, what do you do when youre not working here?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Gunther	 You dont need to fill these silences.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Oh, okay, thanks. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Chandler, thats like your fourth cup of coffee!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Well, I am drinking lots of cups of coffee because Im exhausted!Because Joey started snoring!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Hes in a different room! Hes really that loud?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Oh, you should here me.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Its not something to be proud of, okay? You have to go to asleep clinic!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Look, I told ya, Im not going to any clinic! I dont have aproblem, youre the one with the problem! You should go to a "Quit being a babyand leave me alone" clinic!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 They dont have those.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Yeah, they do! Quit being a baby and leave me alone! There, youvejust had your first class!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Yknow I used to go out with this guy that was a really lightsleeper, and whenever I started to snore, he would just roll me over
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Ohhh, yeah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 He would just roll me over and I would stop snoring.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Next time you snore, Im rolling ya over!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 I gotta do what I gotta do, you gotta do what you gotta do, you just doit.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	  Hey guys!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Hey, all right!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Oh, the Olympics.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Have you guys picked a date yet?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh no, not yet.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 I still cannot believe youre engaged! Just cause its happening so fast; not cause youre such a loser. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh. Thanks. Uh, has anyone seen Rach?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Ugh, shes upstairs not doing the dishes! And I tell yasomething! Im not doing them this time! I dont care if those dishes sit in thesink until theyre all covered withIll do them when I get home!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeahoh! Hey listen umm, Emily found this wedding dress inLondon
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Already?!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah, but it didnt fit. Well, luckily theres a store here thathas one left in her size, but Im the groom, Im not supposed to see thedress 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Ill pick it up for you!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Thank you.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Okay.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Oh, shes got you running errands, yknow, picking upwedding dresses  Wah-pah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Whats wah-pah?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Yknow, whipped! Wah-pah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Thats not whipped! Whipped is wh-tcssh!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Thats what I did. Wah-pah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 You cant do anything!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Hey, Mon, I was just doing the dishes! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh! Its you.  Hi.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Hey, do uh, do you have a minute?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah, I was just about to take a break anyways, so
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 So listen uh, I know you and I havent really had a chance to talksince uh, Emily and I decided to get married, and uh, I was just wondering how you were.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 I know if you were getting married Id feel, kinda..yknow.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah. Yeah. Definitely, well it definitely took me by surprise, butIm okay.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 All right, I just wanted to check.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh, thats sweet.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Youre great. And I-I know someday this will happen for you too. Youjust hang in there.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	  Uhh, hang in there?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh, no, I didnt mean, uh
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 I mean maybe you didnt hear about a serious relationship called meand Joshua?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh, I thought you guys had just been on like four dates, I didntrealise that had become anything, yet.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh, no-no-no, no-no-no, it has become, it hasyeah. Oh no, thosewere four great dates. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh. Yeah?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah. Oh, yeah. And I mean, the connection, I mean yknow,emotionally, mentally, physically
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Wow, thats-thats-thats incredible.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 I know isnt it? Its like Im right there with Joshua.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Uh-huh.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 You are right there with Emily. And its yknow, itskinda like. its a tie! Well, I gotta get, I gotta get back to the dishes.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 I gotta get to work.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh yeah? Fine.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Hey, yknow, yknow what would make me really happy?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh yeah, no, whats that?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 If like the four of us could all yknow, hang out together. Uh, infact Emilys coming into town this weekend, why dont you say we all havedinner? Say, Sunday night?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 That would be great!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah, all right, its a date. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	  Hang in there. You hang in there.  
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	  Did you say something?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 No, just singing. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh my God! Ohh! Look at this one! Its so beautiful!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yeah, but yknow, about have of these are gonna end up gettingdivorced.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 May I help you ladies?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh, yes, umm, Im here to pick up a dress that you have on hold.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 Yes, whats the name, please?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Emily Waltham.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 Yes! I have it right here.  Would you like to try it on Ms. Waltham?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	  Okay.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Youre the most beautiful bride Ive ever seen.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 I am, arent I?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 Ms. Waltham?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Yes?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 Were closing.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 All right. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	The Saleslady	 And could I get my ring back?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 All right buddy, time to roll over.   No-no!  No, no-n-n-n-no!! You are going to aclinic! Youre going to a clinic, and a pyjama store!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Does she use the cups? Yes! I believe she does. Does she use the plates?Yes! I believe she does. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh. Thank you. Ohhh, thank you very much. Oh, thank you for coming. Uh, just a second!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 No-no, let me in!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Phoebe?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yeah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Can you just hold on for one minute?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 No, you have to let me in right now!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Are you alone?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yes!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 All right.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 This sucks! I didnt know I had to stay up all night before I went tothis stupid sleep clinic! Im so tired!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Its 6:00.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Yeah, well
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	  Hi!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Hey, I hear that you and Joshua are going out to dinner with Ross andEmily, and I think thats, I think thats really cool.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Yeah, Rach, I think youre handling that really well.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Handling it? What do you mean, handling it? Theres nothing tohandle. Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasnt for me and Joshua.Yknow, theyre not gonna get married anyway!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 What?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Come on! They rushed into this thing so fast its ridiculous! Imean, theyre gonna be engaged for like what? A year? And somewhere along the way,one of them is gonna realise what theyve done and theyre call the whole thingoff. Im telling ya, youre gonna be dancing at my wedding before youredancing at theres.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I dont dance at weddings.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Why not?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Because weddings are a great place to meet women, and when I dance, Ilook like this 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Hey man.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 So, what are you guys doing four weeks from today?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Nothing.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Nothing.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 I am  free!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Great! Because Emily and I are getting married in a month!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey, Chandler	 What?!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yep!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 In a month?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 You mean, you mean 30 days?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 From now? 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well, thats great.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah! Yeah, Emily always wanted to get married in this beautiful placethat her parents got married, but its going to be torn down, so I mean, I-Iknow its crazy, but everything up til now has been so crazy, and I dontknow, this just feels right. Yknow?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Hey! Thats the day after I stopmenstruating!  This isnt mine.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	  Hey, Rachel.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Hi!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 Whats up? Youre voice sounded all squeaky on the phone.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Ohh, nothing, I just wanted to see you. See you and hug you. See you.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 Great!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah!  Sit!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	  You okay?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Im more than okay, I am really, really happy! Wanna know why?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 Do I?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Cause I am really happy about us. I think we are, I think we areso on the right track! Yknow? I mean, I think we are working, I think we areclicking. Yknow?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 Yeah, sure-sure, yeah,were-were-were-were-were clicking.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah-yeah, yknow if-if there was just like one little area whereIthat I think we needwe would need to work on; I-I would think it waswere just not crazy enough!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 I-I gotta say, I-I-I-Im not too sure I agree with that.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well, yeah, right, yknow what? Yeah, youre right, I mean, weno, we have our fun. Yeah! But if I mean, I meanlike craaaazy! Yknow? Okay, all right. This is gonna, this is gonna soundyknow, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. Umm. Ugh. What if we gotmarried?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 What?! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh, I know, I know, its-its so, its so totally like,"Whoa! Can we do this?" Yknow, I mean, but I mean it just feels right!Dont you think? It does! I mean, it just feels right, dont you think?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 Wow! Uhh, Rachel uhh, youre a real special lady, but my divorceisnt final yet and, and, and weve been on four days, so Im thinking"No, but thanks."
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Gunther	 YOU IDIOT!!!!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Sleep Clinic Worker	 Your name, please?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 Joey Tribbiani.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Sleep Clinic Worker	 Um-hmm, and did you stay up all night in preparation foryour sleep study.  Uh, sir? 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	  Yes he did.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Sleep Clinic Worker	 Alll right, well call you in a few minutes.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	  Hey, check out that girl! She is really hot!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Yeah, she is. Wow!  How youdoin?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	 What?!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Youre coming on to the entire room! Im Chandler.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Woman	 Im Marjorie.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Hi.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Marjorie	 Hi.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 You mind if I
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Marjorie	 No, please. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 So uh, what are you in for?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Marjorie	 I talk in my sleep.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 What a coincidence, I listen in my sleep.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  So why dont you give me your number?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Okay, ready?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Okay.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	  I got it! Mine! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Congratulations!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Thank you!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Okay! My turn! My turn!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Okay!  Okay, ready?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Okay. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	  That was a terrible throw!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Im not gonna right to you! Thats not real!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Look at me! My big concern is whats real?!  Ohmy God. Were really sad, arent we?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yeah, I think we are.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 This isnt even my dress.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Well, at least you didnt rent yours from a store called,"Its Not Too Late."
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Im changing out of this.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Me too.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 In like a half-hour?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Me too.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Okay, throw it straight this time.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Okay.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Im getting married next!!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yay!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 I hate my regular clothes now! Yknow? I look down and-and Iknow that this isnt gonna be the most special day of my life.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Yeah. I mean it was kinda fun for a while, but didnt you startfeeling silly?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 I guess.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Oh my God! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh God.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Oh, youre such a cheater!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	  Hello! Little ones.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 So, is Joey gonna stop snoring?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Yep! And! A beautiful woman agreed to go out with me.  Joey wanted to ask her out, but uh, she picked me.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Oh, howd that happen?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Because Im cooler.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 No, seriously.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Well shes, shes the kinda girlJoey was unconscious. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Hey you guys! Whats happening?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh my God!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 What is that?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Oh, they gave it to me at the sleep clinic, and its gonnahelp me not to snore.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Well, are you asleep right now, Joe? Cause I dont think youhave to wear it unless you are!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  I know I dont have too! It tastes good.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Chandler	 Plus, you look cool.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	  Well, I just called Joshua
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Oh, how did it go?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well, I did my best to convince him that Im not some crazy girlwho is dying to get marriedIm just going through a hard time.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 What did he say?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well uh, his answering machine was very understanding. Ugh. Ifeel blue.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Ohh, sweetie!  Hey, I bet you anything thathes gonna call you again.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe, but I dont think I even care. I dont thinkhes the one Im sad about. Yknow, I know that I said that I am totallyokay with Ross getting married, but as it turns out, I dont think Im handlingit all that well.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Yeah, maybe.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 And I-I am just trying to figure out why.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Any luck?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well, yeah, yknow how Ross and I were on again, off again, onagain, off again? I guess I just figured that somewhere down the road, we would be onagain.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Again. Yknow what? I think we all did.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	  Hey!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Hey! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 So, I got us some reservations for Sunday night, okay? How about,Ernies at 9 oclock?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah, well, you uh, better make it for three.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh, see I-I dont know if were gonna be hungry at three.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Three people. Joshuas not gonna be there.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 What happened?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Uh, well, I think, I think he broke up with me.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Noo. Why?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Well, apparently he scares easy.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Oh, Rachel, Im-Im sorry.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Its okay. Sometimes, things dont work out the way youdthought they would.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Come here.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	  Oh, hey, dont you have to go pick up Emily?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Ross	 You okay?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yeah! I got my girls.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Ugh. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	  Hey, yknow what might cheer you up?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 What?
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Yknow, I gotta tell ya, this really does put in a better mood.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh, I wish there was a job where I could wear this all the time. Maybe someday, there will be.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 Oh God! Hes gonna come by and borrow some candles for his bigdate!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh, okay! 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Monica	 No-no, Rachel, dont get it! He cant see us!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 No, yeah! The groom cannot see the bride!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Im not gonna marry Chandler!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Phoebe	 Not after this!
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Okay, you guys, just relax.  I doooo. 
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joshua	 I gotta go.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Rachel	 Oh, wait, Joshua! Joshua!   Yeah, well, thatoughta do it.
04	20	0420	The One With The Wedding Dresses	Joey	  Dude! I am trying to sleep! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Yknow what? It seems like all of the sudden; so much hashappened.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 I know. Ross is getting married.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Phoebe is, making people.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Everybodys doing stuff!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 And we just sit here. I mean if I die the only way people would evenknow I was here, would be by the ass print on this chair! Look, we have to do something.Okay? Something huge!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	  We could climb Mt. Everest!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 No-no, not something stupid, something huge.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no, I saw an ad for this video, people climb that thingeveryday! We could totally do that!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Why not?! I mean its just, its just climbing! Itsjust, its just steep!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Yeah!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Were going to Everest! Okay, it would be nice to leave an assprint on Everest!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	  Hey!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Hey!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 What-whats up?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Were gonna climb Mt. Everest!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Yeah baby!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Really?! I looked into that. Yeah, but, I mean it costs like $60,000 andyknow you can die. And, you would die!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	  Yeah, well
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 We could get that Everest video though.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Yeah, we could do that without yknow risking our lives at all!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 And while were down at the video store, you know what else we couldrent? Die Hard!  Oh, yknow what? I just remembered,that Everest thing is only available through mail order.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	  Oh, well
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 So you guysll stay here and hang out with me?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Yeeeeahhhh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Yeah. Yeah.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 But Ill tell you something. One of these days were get offof our buts and rent Die Hard again!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Yeah we are!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 So what did he decide? Does your Uncle Nathan get an invite or not?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Ohh, God, nobody likes him, and hes so cheap, hed never fly toLondon in a million years. Yeah, invite him? Hey, did I do these neat enough? 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 Yeah, theyre fine.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 If anyone asks, well just say Ben addressed them.  Oh! So you invited Rachel then?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Sure. Why not?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 Really?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 I dont think Id be comfortable with any of my old loversthere.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Wait-wait-wait, do you, do you think, maybe we shouldnt invite her?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 Oh, no-no, yknow I absolutely adore Rachel its just that,well it might be a awkward for you. But its absolutely your decision. More tea?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah sure.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Emily	 Earl Grey?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Huh? Yeah, fine, invite whoever you want.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 I don't want to be single, okay? I just... I just- I just wanna be marriedagain!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 And I just want a million dollars! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Rachel?!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh God Monica hi! I just went to your building and you weren't there andthen this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Okay, everybody, this is Rachel, another Lincoln High survivor.  This is everybody, this is Chandler, and Phoebe, and Joey, and- you remember mybrother Ross? 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Hi, sure!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Hi. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You know you probably didn't know this, but back in high school, I had a,um, major crush on you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I knew.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You did! Oh.... I always figured you just thought I was Monica's geekyolder brother.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I did.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Oh. Listen, do you think- and try not to let my intense vulnerabilitybecome any kind of a factor herebut do you think it would be okay if I asked youout? Sometime? Maybe?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Okay... okay, maybe I will...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	  See, I see.... big passion in your future.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Really?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 I do.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh Ross, you're so great. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 It's never gonna happen.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Hey, I have a question. Well, actually, it's not so much a question as..more of a general wondering... ment.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Okay.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Okay. Umm, for a while now, I've been wanting to, um....
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ohhh!!!! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yes, yes, that's right...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh, look at the little cat! Look at it!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What?  Ow!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica, Joey, Phoebe	  I'm on top of the world,looking down on creation and the only explanation I can find...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 All right, listen, missy. If you want this cart, you're gonna have totake me with it! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  Yes! Did you see that?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You were incredible! Brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I could not have done this without you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Ok, um, uh, more clothes in the dryer?  I'm fine, I'm fine.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You had no right to tell me you ever had feelings for me.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  What?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 I was doing great with Julie before I found out about you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. You think it's easyfor me to see you with Julie?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 The point is I... I don't need this right now, OK. It, it's too late, I'mwith somebody else, I'm happy. This ship has sailed.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Fine.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Good.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Good. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life Im doingsomething I actually care about. This is the first time in my life Im doingsomething that Im actually good at. I mean. if you dont get that...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 No, hey, I get that, okay, I get that big time. And Im happy for ya,but Im tired of having a relationship with your answering machine! Okay, Idont know what to do anymore.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Well neither do I!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Is this about Mark?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  Oh my God.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Okay, its not, its not.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh my God. I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again,Ross, no, youre, youre, youre making this too hard.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Oh Im, Im making this too hard. Okay, what do you want me todo.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I dont know, I dont know. Urrrgh! Look, maybe we should takea break.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Okay, okay, fine, youre right. Lets ah, lets take abreak,  lets cool off, okay, lets get some frozen yogart, orsomething.. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 No.  A break from us.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chloe	 Do I know why were rushing?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah, y'know the ah, the girlfriend I told you about last night?Well it turns out she ah, she wants to get back together with me. Oh, I found it!! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chloe	 Thats so great for you guys!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chloe	 Good luck, with your girlfriend. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Oh, thank you.  Hey, hey.  Rachel!!!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Hi. Ohhh, you got my message.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah, oh hey, you are right on time.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 So what do you say? Can I be your girlfriend again?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yes, you can, very much.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	  Ahhhh!! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  Y'know what, I want you to leave! Get outta here! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 No!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Just get out! Now!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 No!! No!! I wanna stay. I wanna talk about this.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Okay! All right! How was she?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Uh-oh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Was she good?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Dont answer that.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Come on Ross! You said you wanted to talk about it, lets talkabout it!! How was she?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 She was...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Awful! Horrible!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 She was not good. Not good.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 She was nothing compared to you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 She, she was different.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Ewwwww!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Uh-oh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Good different?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Nobody likes change.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What? Okay, okay, okay, okay.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  ...the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how muchyouve grown. Y'know?  I mean my Mom never thought this would work out.It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater.  Ooh, I just wish wehadnt lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a littleperspective...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 WE WERE ON A BREAK!!!!!!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 You seem to really like her.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah, I really do. Yeah, but what am I gonna do, I mean we-we both agreedthat it was gonna be a two-week thing, yknow no commitment.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends,asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monicas photo albums, I mean youdont do that if youre just in it for two weeks.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You think?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, andyoure sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Hey, youre right.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Ohh, this is soo amazing! I cant believe my brothers gettingmarried! And in London! Its so romantic!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	  Hey, pretty smart! Tissue paper! Youreat the wedding, you have to cry, "Handkerchief?" "No-no, I got myinvitation."
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Oooh look! Isnt this adorable, Ross let Ben address mine!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	  Hello!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Hey!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Hey!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Hey! Hey, did you get your invitation to Rosss wedding?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	  Noo.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Dont worry man, I get to bring a guest. Well show him.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Im so jealous youre all going! I cant believe I neverknew that you cant fly in your third trimester!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 I didnt know that.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 I never knew that either.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 I knew that!  I sooo didnt know that, but youshould see your faces.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  Hey guys! Whats up?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Heyyy. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Were hanging out.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Whats this? Is this Rosss wedding invitation?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 See, maybe thats the one we shouldve actually hidden.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh, no! No you guys! Come on, you dont have to do that! Imhappy for him! I am! I reallyIm-Im happIll work on it.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Im sorry honey.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Rach, youre gonna come though arent you?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh, honey, I dont know. I
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 This isnt one of those uh, yknow "If she doesntcome, we-we dont, we dont come?" Right? Because I already bought myticket
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 You know what would be real weird? Is if you werent there. Justsay youll think about it, okay?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 No, Ill think about it. Yeah.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Who's this from?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Oh, that's Ross's. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh...  Oh my God. He remembered.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Remembered what?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 It was like months ago. We were walking by this antique store, and I sawthis pin in the window, and I told him that it was just like one my grandmother had when Iwas a little girl. Oh! I can't believe he remembered!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 Oh, it's so pretty. This must have cost him a fortune.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 I can't believe he did this.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Come on, Ross? Remember back in college, when he fell in love withCarol and bought her that ridiculously expensive crystal duck?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 What did you just say?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	  F-hah.... flennin....
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh.... my God.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	   Oh my God.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Julie	 Well, Ross and I were in grad school together.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 But we haven't seen each other since then. Well I land in China, guesswho's in charge of the dig. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Julie! Julie, isn't that great? I mean, isn't that just kick-you-in-the-crotch, spit-on-your-neck fantastic?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Oh, that is so sweet. No, no, ok, you hang up. Ok, ok, one, two,three. Well you didn't hang upeither. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  She didn't hang up either...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	  Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	  Ross, hi, it's Rachel. I'm just calling to say that um,everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat......Iam over you. I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Rach, I got a message from you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh my God. Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phoneRoss, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. . . 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You're over me?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ohhhhhhhh God. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Wha... you're uh, you're, you're over me?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ohh, ohh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 When, when were you... under me?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 OK, I need to lie down. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 He broke up with Julie. Well, go hug her, for god's sakes.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Really?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Really. It's always been you, Rach.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh, god.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler, Joey	 Ohhh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 I've no idea, could be. Listen, I'm sorry I had to work tonight.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Ah, oh God. Oh, honey, oh that's OK.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What. Oh no, you just rolled over the juice box.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Gunther! Gunther. Gunther, please tell me you didnt say anything toRachel about me and the girl from the Xerox place.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Gunther	 Im sorry. Was I not supposed to?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Y'know, hey! Youre the one who ended it, remember?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You still love me?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Noo.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What does this mean? What do you, I mean do you wanna, get back together?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Noo! Maybe! I, I dont know. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 What?!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I just, I feel, I-I just...
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting backtogether again! We are so over!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	  FINE BY ME!! 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnthappen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 I KNEW IT!!!!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mrs. Geller	 Rachel's coming up the path.  Doesn't she lookpretty. Jack... 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh my God.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 You know what this is, this is us getting ready for the prom.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Oh.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 You know what, you guys, we don't have to watch this.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	All	 Oh yeah we do. C'mon.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mrs. Geller	 Get a shot of Monica. Where's Monica.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mr. Geller	 Wait, how do you zoom out?  There she is.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Shut up, the camera adds ten pounds.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Ahh, so how many cameras are actually on you?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 Oh, dad, turn it off.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mr. Geller	 It is off.  Right Ross? 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Lookin' good Mr. Cotter.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's toolate.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 If you're not going then I don't want to go either.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mrs. Geller	  I have a wonderful idea. Youshould take Rachel to the prom.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Y'know what?  I think we've seen enough, let's turn it off.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	All	 No, no, no.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 OK, fine, well I'm not gonna watch, alright.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mr. Geller	 C'mon kid, let's go.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mrs. Geller	 Ahh, are you hadsome.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mr. Geller	 Let's show 'em.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	  Okay dad.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mr. Geller	  Rachel, ready or not, here comes yourknight in shiningOh no. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel, Monica, Roy, Chip	 Bye.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, dear. Jack, how do I turn this off?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	  I can't believe you did that.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Ross	 Yeah, well.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Phoebe	 See, he's her lobster.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	  Nooooo. Youre really not going?
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 Yeah. Its just gonna be too hard. Yknow? I mean, itsRoss. How can I watch him get married? Yknow its just, its for the best,yknow it is, its Yknow, plus, somebodys got to stay herewith Phoebe! Yknow shes gonna be pretty big by then, and she needs someone tohelp her tie her shoes; drive her to the hospital in case she goes into labour.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Monica	 You dont have a car. And your license expired. 
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Rachel	 I know.  Yeah, see, theres so much to do and I haveso little time to do it in.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 All right, check it out. Check this out. It says here thattheres a place you can go to rent videos of all the museums!  "Its almost as good as being there."
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Its better! You cant go to a museum in your underwear!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 Well, You could, but... probably just the onetime.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 I bet we could get videos of all the sites, get a VCR in ourhotel room... we'd never even have to go outside!
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Chandler	 If we do that, we gotta get Die Hard.
04	21	0421	The One With The Invitation	Joey	 Oh-ho! I bet the British version is gooooood!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	  Thats like the tenth time Ive peed since Ivebeen here!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Thats also like the tenth time you told us.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Yeah, oh Im sorry, it must be really hard to hear! I tell ya,its a lot easier having three babies play Bringing in the Noise, Bringing in da Funkon your bladder! Im so sick of being pregnant! The only happiness I get is from acup of coffee, which of course is decaf, causeOh! Im pregnant!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Pheebs, didyou want a cookie?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	  Thank you so much.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 So uh, Pheebs, honey, how are those mood swings coming?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 I havent really had any yet.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey guys!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Hey.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Hey!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 All right, heres the ring.  
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  Yes! Yes! A thousand times, yes!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 So uh, any ideas for the bachelor party yet?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! Before you start handing out wedding rings and planningbachelor parties, dont you have to decide who your best man is gonna be?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Oh, its awkward. Its awkward. Its awkward.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 I sortve already asked Chandler.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 What?! He got to do it at your first wedding!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Joey, I figured youd understand. I mean, I-Ive known him a lotlonger.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Come on Ross! Look, I-I dont have any brothers; Ill never getto be a best man!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 You can be the best man when I get married.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  Ill never get to be a best man!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	  Wait-wait, so, you get to be my best man twice and I neverget to be yours at all?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, youyeah, of course you get to be my best man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  What about me?! You-youjust said I could!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Im not even getting married! Okay, this is a question forscience fiction writers!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 I cant believe youre not picking me.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey, how can it not be me?!HeyHey!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Im not even Im not even
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Fine, yknow what, thats it. From now on, Joey, I want you tobe my best man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yes!  Shame about you man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	  Stop it!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 What?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 One of the babies is kicking.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 I thought that was a good thing.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Its not kicking me, its kicking one of the other babies. Oh! Dont make me come in there!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  Hey!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Hey!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Do you guys have like a big bowl I can borrow?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Yeah, theres one right under the cabinet. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  Thanks.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Why do you need it?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, were having a big party tomorrow night. Later! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Whoa! Hey-hey, you planning on inviting us?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Nooo, later. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Hey!! Get your ass back here, Tribbiani!! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Hormones!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 What Phoebe meant to say was umm, how come youre having a partyand were not invited?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, its Rosss bachelor party.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Sooo?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Are you bachelors?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Nooo!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Are you strippers?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Nooo!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Then youre not invited. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 All right fine! Youre not invited to the party were gonnahave either.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh-whoa, what party?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Well umm
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 The baby shower for Phoebe!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Baby shower. Wow! That sounds sooo like something I dont want to do!Later! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 I cant believe Im gonna have a party! This is so great! A party!  Yay!!  I dont know why.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 This is what Ive got going for the party so far, liquor wise. Get alot of liquor.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Great. Great.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Okay, now uh, in terms of the invite list, Ive got you, me, andChandler and Im gonna invite Gunther cause, well, weve been talkingabout this pretty loud.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Gunther	 Ill be there.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 All rightoh! Listen, I know this is your party, but Id reallylike to the number of museum geeks that are gonna be there.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Yeah. Tell ya what, lets not invite any of the anthropologists, onlythe dinosaur dudes!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Okay! Well need a six-pack of Zima.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  Hey guys, what are you doing?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Oh, just planning my bachelor party with my best man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Yeah, well, good luck trying to top the last one.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Yeah, see, I dont think its gonna that difficult consideringthis one wont be taking place in the basement of a Pizza Hut.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Oh, Im Ross. Im Ross. Im too good for the Hut;Im too good for the Hut.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Look, I gotta go pick up Ben. Everything so far sounds great Joey, justremember to keep it on the mellow side, okay? Just a couple of guys hanging out playingpoker, no-no strippers or anything okay?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 You got it.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Okay, see ya later.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 See ya. Have fun planning your mellow bachelor party.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Well, theres gonna be strippers there. He didnt say anythingabout no strippers.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 He just said, "No strippers."
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, I chose not to hear that.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Look what I got! Look what I got! Look what I got!  Can you believe they make these for little people?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Little village people.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Okay, look at this one. This is my favourite. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Oh, that is so sweet!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 I know! Phoebe is gonna love dressing them in these!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Huh. Except, Phoebes not gonna be the one that gets to dress them.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Because shes not gonna get to keep the babies.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Oh my God! We are throwing the most depressing baby shower ever!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Wait a minute! Unless, we give her all gifts she can use aftershes done being pregnant. Like-like umm, regular coffee, Tequila.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Oh, and somebody can get those leather pants shes always wanted!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Oh, shes gonna love that!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 What the hell is this?! What, did you actually thought it would make mefeel better to give me stuff that I cant use for another two months?! This sucks!All right, whats my next present?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	All	 I dont have anything. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey listen man, about the stripper
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yeah?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Good call!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  Okay, a little announcement,a little announcement. Ive decided that my best man is, my best friend Gunther!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Gunther	 Whats my last name?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Central Perk?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Gunther	  Thanks for not marrying Rachel. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh-whoa-wait, Gunther dont-dont forget your shirt. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey-hey, what are those?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, little party favours, check it out! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Wow! Yeah!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh-oh! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  Okay, okay, a little announcement, Ijust want everyone to know that the position of my best man is still open! And uh,  so is the position of the bride.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Great!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Smooth man. Yeah, you got some chilie on your neck.  Well, I just want to say, thanks everyone, this-this was great.And hey! See you guys Monday morning.  Thanks Joey.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, hey, dont forget your shirt.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Oh, thanks! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Okay, hey, museum geeks, partys over. Okay. Wave bye-bye to the nicelady. There you go. Back to your parents basement. All right.  Come on boys, come on out!Here you go. All right.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Ohhh, look at the little birdies! Are those yours?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yeah!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Wow, I didnt know they let you keep chickens and ducks aspets.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh yeah-yeah. And I got the duck totally trained. Watch this. Stare at thewall.  Hardly move.  Be white. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 You are really good at that. So uh, I had fun tonight, you throwone hell of a party.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh thanks. Thanks. It was great meetin ya. And listen if any of myfriends gets married, or have a birthday, or a Tuesday
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Yeah, that would be great. So I guess umm, good night.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh unless you uh, you wanna hang around.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Yeah?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yeah. Ill let you play with my duck.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Hey,  stripper! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  The stripper stole thering!! The stripper stole the ring!! Chandler! Chandler, get up! Get up! The stripperstole the ring!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  What?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 The ring is gone!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Ugh. Just a sec, give me a minute to wake up for thisAh-ha-ha!!You lost the ring! Youre the worst best man ever!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Dude, this isnt funny! What am I gonna do?! I go to bed last night,everythings cool! I wake up this morning, the strippers gone and the ring isgone!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 You slept with the stripper?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Of course!! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Hi, guys.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Hi! Phoebe. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Hi Phoebe.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 I-I wanted to apologise if Iyknow seemed a tad edgyyesterday at my shower. Yknow its just the hormones, yknow.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 No we
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Hormones.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 hormones, yeah.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Anyway, I just wanted to say thank you, it was just, it was so sweet.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Wow, you seem to be doing so much better. Thats great. So how-howare things going?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Good. Yknowno-no, okay, its-it feels likeeverythings been about me lately, so whats happening with you?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Oh, well, actually we were just talking about me not going toRosss wedding.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Oh!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 It just might be too hard, given the history and all that
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Wow! This reminds me of the time when I was umm, living on the streetand this guy offered to buy me food if I slept with him.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Well, h-how is this like that?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Well, lets see, its not. Really, like that. Because, you seethat was an actual problem, and uh, yours is just like yknow a bunch ofyknow high school crap that nobody really gives yknow
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	  Im-Im sorry, I just thought that
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Alrighty, here come the water works. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Ugh! I dont know what Im going to do! I called the companythat sent and th-they dont care! Then I called 9-1-1 and they laughed at me, if thisisnt an emergency, then what is?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	  Hey guys!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Hey!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Hey
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 I just wanted to thank you again for last night, what a great party! Andthe guys from work had a blast. Yknow, one of them had never been to a bachelorparty before. Yeah! And-and another one had never been to a party before, so
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 So uh, hey, that uh, that wedding ring, huh? Man, thats nice!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Yeah, right!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 I was uh, I was thinking I might want to pick one of those babies up formyself, I might want to get one of those
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 That ring? When my grandmother first came to this country, that ring andthe clothes on her back were all she had with her.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 So you might say, the ring is irreplaceable? 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Oh absolutely! It has been in my family for generations, and every bridewho has worn it has had a long and happy life.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 So you might say, its a magic ring.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  Yeah, the stripper stole it.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 My-my ring? My-my wedding ring? The-the stripper stole my wedding ring?!H-how?! How could this all happen?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Well, I think it all started when you said, "Hey Joey, whydont you be my best man."
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	  All right-all right, fine! I-Im gonna call thecops!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Dude, I screwed up, you dont have to turn me in!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Not on you! On the stripper!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, yeah, well I already did that! They said theyre gonna look intoit right after they solved all the murders.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Okay, well, well call the company that sent her!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 I did that too! They wouldnt give me her real name or her number.They said, "If I bothered them again theyd call the police." I said,"If you talk to the police, you tell them Im missing a ring!"
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 So what, Joey? Wh-wh-what? What are you telling me? That theresnothing we can do? Well, how could this happen?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Look Ross, I am so-so sorry. I-I-I
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Well, what if we just ah, called her, used a fake name, and had hercome to my office?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Oh, that sounds like fun, but weve got a ring to find!!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Heres your tea Phoebe. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	  Its so good.  Oh, thanks.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Good.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Im so glad you liked it.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	  Oh! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 What?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 What?! She made the tea! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Oh! No, I-I think I just had a contraction.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 You what?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Oh my God!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Yeah, I thought I had one a couple of minutes ago, and now I know thatwas definitely one.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Wait, you cant have the baby here! I mean I haventsterilised it since the guys moved out!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Okay. Its okay. Were gonna be okay. Yknow what?Its okay. Im gonna, Im gonna, Im gonna boil some water and justrip up some sheets!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 No. Its all right; its probably false labour. They saidthat, that can happen near the end, just somebody get the book.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Rachel, get the book! The book!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Okay!  Okay! Here!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 The Bible?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 I dont know!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 All right, okay, this is great, uh, Chandler, you get behind the desk.And-and when she comes in hopefully, she wont recognise you because, well, why wouldshe? Uh, okay, and then you buzz Ross and I.  You be Mr. Gonzalez, and Illbe uh, Mr. Wong.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Diverse.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Did anybody call for security?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	  You be cool. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Okay, which one of you guys is Gunther Central-Perk? Hey, Joey?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Wheres my ring? My dead grandmothers wedding ring? Where isit? Where is it?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Way to be cool, man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Whats he talking about?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 There was a ring, in a box, on my nightstand, after you left, it was gone!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Wait, you guys think I stole some ring?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Guys	 Yeah!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 We know you took so just-just save yourself the time and confess!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Stripper	 Okay, who are you? The Hardy boys? Look, I dont need tosteal some stupid ring, all right? I make $1,600 a week doing what I do; any of you guysmake that?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Marry me. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 I dont get it! It was in my room all night! And if she didnttake it, and I didnt take it; and you  didnt take it, then who did? Shh! Were trying to think! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 I still dont get how you know when its false labour.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Well, do you see any babies?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 How do you feel?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Okay, I guess. I mean I dont know, its just, I guess Iknow its going to be over soon.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Well, isnt that a good thing? You said you were sick of this.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 I know. Its just yknow usually when youre, whenyoure done with the pregnant thing, yknow, then you get to do the mom thing.Im gonna be yknow, sitting around in my leather pants, drinking Tequila.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Some moms do that.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Okay thats even sadder. Look, I know, I know what I got myselfinto, its just that now that theyre in me its like, its like Iknow them yknow, I mean-I mean, its just not gonna be easy when these littlebabies have to go away.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Aww, sweetie, but its not like youre not gonna haveanything. Youre gonna have nieces and nephews, and some ways thats evenbetter.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 No, really. Really, Pheebs, youre not gonna be the one worryingabout saving for college, or yelling at them when theyre bad, yknow, ordeciding to put them on Ritalin when they just wont calm down. Yknow?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 I mean, youre the one theyre gonna come to when they wannarun away from home, and the one they talk to about sex.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 And you just get to be cool Aunt Phoebe!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Cool Aunt Phoebe. I am pretty cool!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Yeah.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 And yknow what else, oh my God, are they gonna love you.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 They are gonna love me.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 Oh!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Thanks you guys! Again.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Oh, sweetie! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Youre the best. Thanks. Oh! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica, Rachel	 What?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Just kidding. Ahh!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Rachel	 What?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Monica	 Oh my God!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Phoebe	 Got cha again, you guys are so easy.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 If anything should happen to him
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Joey! The vet said its a simple procedure.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 So! Things can go wrong! You dont know! What if he doesnt makeit?!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 He will, Joe.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yeah, but what if he doesnt? Hes such a good duck.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Im so worried about him, yknow?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Doctor	  Somebody lose a ring?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Oh my God! Thank you! Thank you so much! 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 H-h-h-hows the duck?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	The Doctor	 Hes doing just fine, hes resting now, but you can seehim in a little bit.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Ohh, great! Oh hey, listen Ross, thanks for being so cool about this.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 No, thats all right.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 No, its not. I mean you-you made me your best man and I totally letyou down!
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Hey, come on, its not your fault.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Yeah, it is! You wouldnt have lost the ring, right? Yknowwhat, Ross you were right from the start, he  should be your best man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 No, you should.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Now, dont argue with me
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey! Hey! Hey! I get to choose my best man, and I want both youguys. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Really?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	 Really?
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Hey, both you guys should be up there with me. I mean, you two are-aremy I mean, Im lucky to have just one good 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 Thanks man.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Joey	  I gotta go check something over here. 
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Chandler	 What a baby.
04	22	0422	The One With The Worst Best Man Ever	Ross	 Total wuss!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Guys, hurry up! The flight leaves in four hours! It could take time to geta taxi! There could be traffic! The plane could leave early! When we get to London, therecould be a line at customs! Come on!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Six-hour trip to London. That's a lot of Monica.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 What do you got there?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Condoms, dude!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 How come the writing is in Spanish?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Don't read my condoms!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Passport, check!  Camera,check! Traveller's cheques, check! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Who are you saying "check" too?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Myself. Y'know for remembering to pack a thing. Yeah, you do a good thing,you get a check!  My mom does it, I never realised it was weird.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, my mom used to put her head in the oven. Well, actually, she only didit the one time. But it was pretty weird.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey! Are you ready yet?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yep! You got the tickets?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh! Got 'em right here,  check!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 It's all London, baby! Here we go. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You got your passport?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, in my third drawer on my dresser. You don't want to lose that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ohh!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 There it is.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, if you need the vacuum, it's in my closet on the left-hand side. Ah,the garbage bags are next to the refrigerator...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, okay, but Rachel's gonna be here too, can't I just ask her thisstuff?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, okay, give that a try!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  All right! Let's do it!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Woo-hoo!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, cheerie-o! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 London baby!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, 'cause that's not gonna get annoying.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  London baby!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey, y'know what? I was wrong.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, we're all here! I guess we should get going!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohhh, I wanna come over there and give you a hug and wish you luck on yourwedding, but I don't-can't get up.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, I'll-I'll come hug you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Great! Yeah, could you bring me the newspaper?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, have a great wedding!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thanks.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, hey, Chandler I wanna hug you too!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, and great! You might as well bring me my book, it's on the counter inyour apartment.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  So, we're off.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Have fun!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thanks!  Ugh, I can't believe you're not gonna be there!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, I know.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 So-so come! Why don't you come?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 To London! Come to London. Please? It'll mean so much to me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, well, I gotta work, I'm sorry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Why-why can't you take a couple of days off?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Because, I can't! Ross, I told you, no. I can't.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 This is my wedding.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 All right, y'know what? We really are late! Let's go! Let's go! Let's go!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Fine. You'll-you'll watch it on video when we get back.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Here you go Phoebe! Here you go Phobo!Phewbedo! Phaybobo.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Thank you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Thank you. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 All right, let's go! Bye, Pheebs!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Bye, Pheebs!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 London baby!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, do you need a hug? You don't have to bring me anything!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Come on! Do something!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I am, I'm ignoring you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay, here!  I wanna be the on camera guy. All right,first stop, Westminster Abbey. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, what the hell is that?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 It's London, baby! All right, the hotel's here.  Wait.No, we wanna go... No. I know.  I'm gonna have to go into the map. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, if you see a little version of me in there? Kill it!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I got it!  Here we go.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. Listen-listen, we're not gonna have to walk this way the entiretime are we?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Shhh!  Man, you made me lose it! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 ...and that was all before 10 o'clock. The caterer rang and said it wasgoing to be Chicken Kiev instead of Chicken Tarragon. And then the florist phoned to saythere aren't any tulips. Oh, and the chilliest has carpel-tunel syndrome. We're not gonnabe...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! Emily,  honey, okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Well, up yours too!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Oh, that's not what it means?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! No! That's-that's time-out!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Sorry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Sweetie, you gotta relax. Everything's gonna be great, okay? Come on. Comeon.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Chicken Kiev?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Um-hmm! Doesn't that sound delicious at the last minute?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, y'know, but something like salmon which would be so much more elegantthan the chicken. And, you wouldn't have to worry about the salmonella. But of course with salmon you'd have to worry about thechickenella... So, I can't wait to see this place you're getting married!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah. Yeah. Yes, this place is beautiful. Emily's parents got married here.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I still can't believe they're tearing it down. It really is the most lovelybuilding you'll ever see. I mean it's over...  Oh my God!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 It's nice.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Oh. Oh. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	  Oh. Oh my God. How can this be happening? What arewe going to do?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 It's all right! Everything's gonna be all right.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 How's it gonna be all right?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh-huh, I see that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Okay, I talked to the guy with the shovel and I found out whathappened. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? What?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 They tore it down a few days early.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right! Westminster Abbey! Hands down, best Abbey I've ever seen. Hey! Okay. What do you think of the Abbey, Chandler?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I think it's great. It's great. Y'know, they're thinking of changing thename of this place.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Really? To what?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 To Put the Camera Away!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Man, you are Westminster Crabby. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Don't worry. You'll find some place to get married.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oowww!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Dressmaker	 Sorry. Lucky this dress is red!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 We can't find another place. Then we can't have the wedding! I've orderedchicken and salad and-and cake for 150. What should be the most wonderful day of my lifeis rapidly turning into just Sunday with a spectacular amount of food!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 You're gonna find a place. But even if - God forbid - you didn't.. So youpostpone the wedding. Is that really so bad? I mean, think about it. You could take allthe time you needed to get everything that you want. You could have tulips, you could havesalmon.... Mmmmm... Salmon!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I suppose it wouldn't be the end of the world... Oh, thank you!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 But either way... You're gonna get married, you're gonna be happy, my mom'sgonna like you better than me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, god... She's told you that already, didn't she?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh. Oh.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, honey! Don't get up! What do you need?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, no. Oh, nothing.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Come on! I am here to take care of you! What do you need? Anything.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, I have a wedgie.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, that is all you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So-so, what do you want for lunch?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, I don't know. I guess we have to eat.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I do. What's the matter?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I'm just bummed about the way I left things with Ross. I shouldn't havelied to him about having to work. He seemed so mad at me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Eh, don't be so hard on yourself. If someone I was still in love with wasgetting married...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Still in love with?! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I'm not in love with Ross!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh. No. No. Good! Yeah, me neither.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Phoebe, I'm going to Ross's wedding because he is my ex-boyfriend and thatwould be really uncomfortable. Not because, I'm still in love with him! I mean, hey,y'know, I like Ross as much as the next guy, y'know? Clearly I have feelings for him, butfeelings don't mean love! I mean, I still have loving feelings for Ross. Yeah! But, Ihave, I have continuing feelings of love, but that doesn't mean that-that I'm still inlove with him. Y'know? I-I have sexual feelings for him, but I do love him-Ohh! Oh my God!Oh my-why didn't you tell me?!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 We thought you knew!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 We?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, we all know! We talk about it all the time!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You all know? Does Ross know?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh no, Ross doesn't know anything.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, I can not believe you didn't tell me!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well, because we thought you knew!! It's so obvious! God, that would belike telling Monica, "Hey, you like things clean." Or,y'know, "Hey, Joey, you're gay."
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, please! She's always got a broom in her hand!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Vendor	 So, what are you guys in the market for? We've got uh, scarves, tulippost cards...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Check this out? Huh?  Yeah. That's the stuff. What do you think?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, I don't have to buy that, "I'm with stupid" T-shirtanymore.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, I like it. Here you go. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 All right, look, you're not really gonna buy that are you? Don't youthink you've embarrassed me enough for one day?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, I embarrass you? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How can I answer that when I'm pretending I don't know you?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Vendor	 He's just jealous. You'll fit right in; all Londoners wear them!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh really? Then how come no one here is wearing them?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Vendor	  They're all tourists.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 All right, look, if you insist on wearing that, in public, y'know, you'regonna spend the rest of the afternoon all by yourself.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh yeah?  If you're gonna make me choose between you andthe hat? I choose the hat.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Vendor	 Good choice.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thanks.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, wait. All right, that's it, okay, I'm out of here. I am not goingto be embarrassed anymore! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 How you doin'? Joey Tribbiani, America.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Hello?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey! I just spoke to your dad, and you know what? He seems to think we'll beable to find a new place for the wedding.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 We don't have to.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Whoa-whoa-what? You found a place?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 No. But, Monica and I were talking, and-and I was so upset about the hallbeing knocked down, and she suggested that we put the wedding off for a bit.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 She said what?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 She said, "If I'm not gonna be happy getting married somewhere that wefind in a day, well then we should just postpone it."
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Postpone it? Emily, do you think Monica realises how much our parents spenton this wedding? Do you my sister's teeny-tiny little brain comprehends that people tooktime out of their lives to fly thousands of miles to be here, huh?  This isn't right.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I realise that people are going to be disappointed. But, I'm sure they'llcome back when we can do it right.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I can't ask people to do that? Would you ask people to do that? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Don't you point your pants at me!  We have nochoice! Anywhere that's half-decent would've be booked months ago, Ross don't youunderstand? This is our wedding I'm talking about.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 The only thing I understand is; postponing it is not an option. This is whenwe're getting married.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 So what are you saying? It's now or never?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No. I'm saying it's now. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Or?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 There's no 'or' in mind. What is wrong with these pants?!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 It's not the pants. It's you that is backwards. And if, and if you don'tunderstand how important this is to me, well then, perhaps we shouldn't get married atall! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  No,wait! Emily! No, wait, stop! Emily, please-
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hi.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So, did shopping make you feel any better about Ross?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Manhattan does not have enough stores.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well, I think I can help you get over him.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You can?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah. I just need you to bring me some photos of Ross.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Um-hmm.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 And a small piece of chocolate.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 And a glass of tepid water. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ooh, is this one of those things where you throw it in a bag with somegraveyard dirt and hang it from a north-facing tree?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Uh, only if you have the hiccups too. Yeah, the pictures are for you, thewater and the chocolate is for me. I just didn't feel like getting up. Okay, I'm gonnashow you a picture of Ross. Okay? And you're going to remember all of the bad things abouthim. All right? Really focus on his flaws.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I can do that. I certainly did it when we were going out.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Umm, before we get started, I just wanna say for the record that Ilove Ross, I think he's such a great guy. Here.  Okay, now, close your eyes. And imagine that you're with Ross okay andimagine that you're kissing him. And you're-you're running your hands all over his body.And then you run your hands through his hair, but eew-oh gross it's some kind of grease,it's-uck! Hah?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I don't know, his uh, his hair never really bothered me that much, andy'know it was always more crunchy than it was greasy.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, this is going to be harder than I thought. Umm, let's try some uh,aversion therapy.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So uh, now look at the picture...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right, and umm...  
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ow!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, how do you feel now?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I like you less!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, this is just as boring in England.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh.  Sorry!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No-no-no, y'know what? I really shouldn't have said that you wereembarrassing me, I mean that really wasn't cool. And if it makes you feel any better, I'vehad a really lousy day.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Me too.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Noo!! I've had the best day ever! Dude, check this out! Now,I'm gonna fastforward past the part with you, 'cause it is boring.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Sh-shh-shh! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Okay, so say hi to my friend and tell him that you like the hat. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Fergie	  Okay, so umm, what's your friend's name?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Oh, Chandler.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Fergie	 Hi Chandler!  
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's... That's was...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 That's Fergie baby!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Fergie	 Joey says you don't really like his hat, but I think it's kinda dashing.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  So, I hear you're single now...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Fergie	 Yeah, ummm, I don't like the hat that much. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How did you? How? How?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, I was trying to figure out how to get to Buckingham Palace, right? So,I'm in my map and-and... Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi. I understand you had a little talk with Emily.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Yes, I did! And you are welcome!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Am I?! And was it your idea to postpone the wedding?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Umm...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wait up! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey-hey, since you're the 'fix-it' lady, here's a pickle, what do you do whenthe bride says she doesn't want to have the wedding at all?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 She said that?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Why?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I don't know, I told her it was stupid to put off the wedding just becausethe hall was gone and she liked flipped out.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God. You're even dumber than I am!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Excuse me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ross, how long have you been planning this wedding?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I don't know. A month?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Emily has probably been planning it since she was five! Ever since thefirst time she took a pillowcase and hung it off the back of her head. That's what we did!We dreamed about the perfect wedding, and the perfect place, with the perfect four-tieredwedding cake , with the little people on top.  Thanks. But the most important part isthat we had the perfect guy who understood just how important all that other stuff was.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I had no idea. And that-that pillowcase thing, I thought you guys were justdoing the flying nun.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Sometimes we were.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Come on. You gotta help me figure out what to do. Okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Come on. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That was pretty intense huh?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah.  Hey, I hope Ross didn't think that we just went in therebecause we were uncomfortable being out here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I hope he did!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ooh! I thought of a good flaw! Ross pops his gum!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, right!  Wait a minute, I do that too.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know. It drives me crazy.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I'll get it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hello.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey, Pheebs! It's Joey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey, Joey! Hey! Ooh! Ooh! I just say someone on the-that looks just likeyou on the subway. And I was gonna go over and say 'hi!' but then I figured, he doesn'tcare if he looks like you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 That just cost me four bucks. But uh listen, I just called to see how thechick and the duck are doing?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh, they're having a great time with their Aunt Phoebe! Aunt Rachel hasn'tbeen helpful at all. So, do you miss me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Kinda, but I've just been having way too much fun.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So you're not homesick yet?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, I don't think so.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right, the seven of us miss you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Who's seven?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Y'know, me, Rachel, the birds, the babies...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ahh, the babies miss me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Of course they do! Or I'm just really hungry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ooh, the pizza guy's here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 What? You ordered pizza without me?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah. But y'know we were thinking about you, y'know we ordered the JoeySpecial.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Two pizzas?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yep! Okay, gotta go, talk to you later.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wait, well, where did you get it from?! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Monica, why have you brought me here of all places?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 You'll see.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I tell you, this wedding is not going to happen.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Oh God.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay? But-but imagine a lot more lights, okay? And-and y'know fewer bricks,and-and-and flowers, and candles...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 And the musicians, look, they can go over here ,okay? And the chairs can face this way , and...  You go.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 But-but, if you don't love this, we'll do it in any other place at any othertime. Really, it's fine, whatever you want.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 It's perfect.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 And, I don't know, if it starts to rain...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Well then we'll get wet. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ohh. And I don't even have a date.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Pheebs?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Do you remember where the duck food is?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's in the guys' apartment under the sink. Why?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Because I'm going to London.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What?! What do you mean you're going to London?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him. Now honey, you take care, youdon't have those babies until I get back.  
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But what about all the "finding-his-flaws" stuff we've beendoing?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, that didn't work.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I-Rachel, you can't go! Ross loves Emily!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, I know, I know, I know he does. But I have to tell him how I feel! Hedeserves to have all the information and then he can make an informed decision.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 That's not why you're going! You're going because you hope he's gonna say,"Yeah, I love you too, Rach. Forget that British chippy."
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh-Do you think he will?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No! Because he's in love with the British chippy! Look, Rachel, if you go,you're just gonna mess with his head and ruin his wedding! Y'know, it's too late! Youmissed you're chance! I'm sorry, I know this must be really hard, it's over.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Y'know what? No. It's not over until someone says, "I do."
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I do! I do! I do!  Ido!  Ugh, like I can really chase you. I'm carrying a litter.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 The Waltham Residence.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh...yes..is this..umm..Emily's Parents' house.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 This is the housekeeper speaking. And by the way, young lady, that isnot how one addresses a person on the telephone. First one identifies oneself and thenasks for the person with whom one wishes to speak.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What are you saying?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 Now, let us try that again, shall we?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  No! Ooh! Oh my god! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 The Waltham Residence.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Hello. This is PhoebeBuffay. I was wondering, please, if-if it's not too much trouble, please, umm, might Ispeak to Miss Emily Waltham, please?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 Miss Waltham, is at the rehearsal dinner and it's not polite to makefun of people. Goodbye.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No no no, I'll be nice, I swear!!! Could you just give me the number forwhere they are?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 I'm afraid, I'm not at liberty to divulge that information.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ok, somebody is on their way to ruin wedding okay. And I have to warnsomebody, alright. So if you don't give me that number then I'm going to come over thereand kick your snooty ass all the way to New Glocken..shire.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Housekeeper	 Hangs up.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hello, Hello. Ohh, OHH, she knew I could kick her ass.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi. Mom. Dad.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Sweetheart. Oh sorry were late, my fault, I insisted on riding thetube.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  Judy, the kids..
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Jack, that's what they call the subway.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Ohh, I thought that you....
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross, Monica	 Dad, dad. We got it!! We Got It!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Ohh, here comes my dad and stepmum. Mister and Misses Geller, this is Stevenand Andrea Waltham.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	  Hello. Hello. How do you do? How do you do?Very nice to meet you.  Darling it's the Gellers.   Darling, it's the Gellers.  She's very self-absorbed, you know. I should never have marriedher.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Sorry, what?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 It's the Gellers!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Where?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Well there's one  and there's another .
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Lovely to meet you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Terribly nice of you to offer to pay for half the wedding. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Ohh forget it. Too hell with tradition, we're happy to do it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 We know how expensive weddings can be, besides this may be the onlywedding we get to throw .
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ha ha, a joke that's funny in all countries.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Waiter	 Sir? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 What's in it?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Waiter	 Goat cheese, water chestnuts, and panchetta. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 That's not food...No, I don't, no... Everything's different here...I want to go home. I...I miss my family. Imiss the coffee house. I can't even remember what Phoebe looks like.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Joey, it's been three days, okay.. Your just a little homesick, Okay.Would you just try to relax. Just, just try to enjoy yourself.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Your different here too. Your mean in England.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  What the hell!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 what's up, Dad?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 This bill for my half of the wedding. it's insane.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 How could it be so much? The receptions at their house.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  Flowers, liquor, recarpet firstfloor. New guest bath, landscaping. I'm paying to remodel this guys house.  I'm going to give that son on a bitch, a piece of my mind.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Dad, dad, please. Look I don't want anything to upsetEmily tonight. Alright, she's had a hard enough couple of days as it is.  Now here, here, let me go talk to him, okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 And you tell him no one takes advantage of the Gellers.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Ooh, Jack.... Sometimes I forget how powerfulyou can be. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  And I'm going to go get drunk.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ooh, ooh, ooh,ooh,ooh.  Hi.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	  Hello.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hello. Umm, when is your next flight to London?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	  There's one leaving in thirtyminutes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh, good.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 And I do have one seat left. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 The last minute fare on this ticket is twenty seven hundred dollars.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Huh.. How about 600?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 Sorry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 How about 600 and these earrings? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 They prefer it if I don't barter.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Ohh, I just don't think I have enough left onmy credit card.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 Well you can split it with another credit card.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh, okay, how about five.  Ohh, thankyou.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 I'm just going to need to see your passport.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Okay, you know what? I don't have it, but Ican tell you exactly where it is on my night stand, and...okay. But you know what? I havemy drivers license and I have a twenty. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look, face it, my father is not going to pay for the build-in barbecue andbelieve me you can kiss you gazebo goodbye. Now I might be able to get you the new lawn.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Ahh, then you have to give us the lawn ornaments.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I go back there with lawn ornaments, he's going to laugh in my face.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 This is ridiculous. I mean we had an agreement.  Will you say something, Steven?!Please!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Don't take that tone with me.  All-all rightyou can. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hi, Pheebs.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh thank god. Oh, you changedyour mind. Oh, look I know you probably want to be alone, and you don't want to talk aboutit, that's fine. I just want you to know, I think you are doing the right thing and...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Bye, Pheebs.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Wait!! Where are you going?! What are you doing?! No!!Wait!!  God!! Why am I always pregnant when she does that?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'd like to toast, Ross and Emily. Of course, my big toast will betomorrow at the wedding, so this is kind of my little toast or Melba toast, if you will. Okay. I known Ross for a longtime. In fact, I knew him when he was going out with his first girlfriend.  And I thought things were going to work out for him.. Until the day he overinflated her.  Ohh, DearGod.. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Hello, Waltham Interiors.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, hi, Mrs. Waltham. I need to speak with ether one of the best men, orRoss's sister Monica.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Who is this?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm Phoebe Buffay. I'm one of Ross's best friends.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Where did you get this number?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I got it from your maid. She's a bitch, but I wore her down.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Well, if you're one of Ross's best friends, why aren't you here?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, um, I can't fly. I'm having my brother's babies.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh, am I on the radio?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No..umm, could I talk to one of them? It's very very important.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 No, I'm bored with you now. I'm going to cut you off. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh! Okay, I'm going to have to kick her ass too.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  And I'm sure we're all very excited that Ross andEmily are getting married at Montgomery Hall. I mean to think, my friend getting marriedin Monty Hall.  Ohh, come on!! Monty Hall!! Lets make aDeal!! Come on, you people!! All right, forget it!! Congratulations, Ross and Emily. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, best man number two, Joey Tribbiani. Now I'm not good with the jokeslike Chandler here. Boy...but ahh, I just want to say congratulation to the happy couple.I first met Ross in this coffee house back home...Home...New York City...Where everybodyknows my name. Well anyway, I love you guys.  But not as much as Ilove America.  Could we please..go home now?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Felicity	  Are you going home? I was hoping to get toknow you better.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  I'm not going anywhere, sweetheart.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I was laughing. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Out loud?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well I didn't want everyone to think I was stupid.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So how are you doing?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 My mother's driving me crazy, but Ross is getting married. I'm happy.  I'm not going to let anything spoil that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Drunk Man	 I just want to say that Ross is a wonderful young man.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, thanks, we like him.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Drunk Man	 My god!! You must have been a teenage when you had him. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 There's no way in hell, I'm paying for it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look, were down to just one point. Could we please, maybe just settle itafter the wedding.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 All-right fine, but I just want to say, I'm not paying for your winecellar. You thieving, would be speaking German if it weren't for us, cheap little man.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 The guy was hammered, okay? There's no way, you look like Ross's mother.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Then why would he say it?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Because he's crazy. Okay? He came up to me earlier and thanked me for myvery moving performance in Titanic.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, my mother's right. I'm never going to get married.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ahh, you know what? That is....Who wouldn't want you?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ohh, Please?! I'm a single mom, with a thirty year old son!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi, I'm back. Listen, I need to...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 Hello.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hello. I need to get on the 11 o'clock flight.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 Oh I'm afraid that plane has already pulled away from the gate.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, you know what?  You're going to have to call that plane and tellthem to swing around and come and pick me up.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 I can't do that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Sure, you know what? Come on, we'll just tell them that there was like aproblem with like the "engine".
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to step aside, Miss.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Look, If I don't get to London!! He is going to marry that other girl!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ticket Agent	 I can't imagine why.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right, you know what? I am not leaving here, until you call that planeback!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  I'm getting married today!! Whoo-hoo!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Morning, Ross.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I'm getting married, to..day!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah you are!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ahh, whoo-hoo!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Do you think he knew Iwas here? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohhh.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 Ahh, ahh, excuse me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 If you're planning on doing that throughout the entire flight. Pleasetell me now. So that I could that a sedative...or perhaps slip you one.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh. I'm sorry. I'm very sorry. Sorry.  It'sjust, I'm ahh, I'm kinda excited. I'm, ahh, going to London to ahh, tell this guy that Ilove him and... 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well I've-I've never done that with you before.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Nope. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So, ahh, how are ya? How ya...How ya... You okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yep, yep...You?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes...Yes..Uh-huh, You? We did you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well...I'd better get going.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh yea yea, absolutely.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Could you not look?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I don't want to look.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hello?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Hey, were the hell have you been?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey. I spent the night out. I met this cute bridesmaid. She is so...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I don't want to hear about her!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ahh Pheebs, you know you're still my number one girl.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No! No, we have an emergency. Okay? Rachel's coming to London.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ohh great!!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No it's not great. No, she's coming to tell Ross that she loves him.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  But, he loves Emily?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I KNOW THAT!!! You have to stop her!! She's going to ruin the wedding!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right, so, okay...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hold on. Hold on.  Rachel coming. Do...Something.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, so I'm done my part, okay. It's your responsibility now, okay. Theburden is off me, right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So tell me about this girl?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 ...And so then I realised. All this stuff I had been doing. proposing toJoshua, lying to Ross about why I couldn't come to the wedding. Was all just a way of...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	  Oh, oh oh!! I'm sorry, can Iinterrupt? You know I just want to say..That you are a horrible, horrible person.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ehh, pardon me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 You say you love this man, yet you're about to ruin the happiest day ofhis life. I'm afraid I have to agree with you friend Pheebs.. This is a..this isa...terrible, terrible plan. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 But he has to know how I feel!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 But why? He loves this...this Emily person. No good can come of this.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Well I-I think your wrong.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 Oh-no.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, he doesn't really love her. I mean, it's just a rebound thing fromme.... You'll see!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Passenger	 Fortunately, I won't. And by the way, itseems to be perfectly clear that you were on a break. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Do something..... Something....
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Have you seen Monica?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I'm not seeing Monica.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  What?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look we've got to find her. Phoebe just called!! Rachel's coming to tell Rossshe loves him!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh my god!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know! That's why we got to find Monica!! You know where she is? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No!! Okay!! What's with the third degree?! Why don't you just shine alight in my eyes?! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	  Oh my God! It's like a fairyland.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 I know, it's horrible isn't it?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, I love it. I only hope my wedding looks this good.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 I just hope...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  You can let some of them go by!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Pisst, Monica. Alright, we really need to start looking out forRachel. I'll cover the front door. You watch that big hole at the back of the building andI got Chandler covering Ross.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Why would I care where Chandler is? You know uhh...You knowsometimes I don't even like Chandler.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  I do. I do. I do.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh yea, your right. It's the second one.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Really?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Felicity	 Hello Joey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, Felicity.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Felicity	 Umm, I thought about you all day.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Felicity	 Um-hum. Talk New York to me again.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Fuggetaboutit.  How you doin?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Felicity	 Mmm. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 There's nothing to discuss. We're not paying for your wine cellar.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	  You-you have to meet me in the middle here.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  Hey, you keep pushing me on this, my foots going to meetthe middle of your ass.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Dad!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 What-what's going on?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Nothing, nothing. Everything's under control.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 You want a piece of me, sir? Is that what your saying?  You want a piece of me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay! Okay! That's it!! Parents!! Parents!! Backaway!! All right, this is our wedding day! From now on everyone gets along, and if I hearone more word. NO GRANDCHILDREN!  That's right!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Okay, okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Sorry old boy, sorry. Sorry. Sorry.  I could kill you with my thumb, you know.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 What was all that about?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  It was...This disagreement over... My god. You...you look beautiful.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	  Ohh... Oh! You were notmeant to see me before the wedding. It's bad luck.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 You know what, I think we've had all the bad luck we're going to have. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 My God. Rachel!  Your here. I can't believe it.  What happen? Why are you here?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well I just came...I just needed to tell you...Congratulations. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Hello, Waltham Interiors.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Mrs. Waltham. Hi. It's Phoebe again.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Why?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yea. Can I please, please, please talk to one of the best men? This isgoing to be the last time I promise.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Joey there's a girl on thephone for you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ohh great!!  Hello. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Joey, it's Phoebe. Did you stop Rachel?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, but it's okay. She just came in and gave him a hug, that it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So nothing got ruined?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh that's so great! Ohh, so what's going on now?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ah, I'm-I'm walking down the aisle...Still walking.  I'm about to pass the bridesmaid I hooked up with last night.  Hey!  I told her "Hey." And now I'm at thefront with Ross. It's Phoebe.  He looks pretty mad. Uh...I'dbetter go.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No!! wait, wait, wait!! Oh please, hold it up so I can listen. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What we did last night was....
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Stupid.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Totally crazy stupid. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 What were we thinking?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm coming over tonight though, right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh yeah. Definitely.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyous unionof Ross and Emily. May the happiness we share with them today be with them always. NowEmily, repeat after me. I, Emily...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I, Emily...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Take thee Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Take thee Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 As my lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, till deathparts us.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 As my lawfully wedded husband, in sickness and in health, until death partsus.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Take thee, Emily...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Take thee, Rachel... Emily.  Emily.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  He-he said Rachel, right? Do youthink I should go up there?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	  Uhh...Shall I goon?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Yes, yes, do go on.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  He better go on for what I'm paying.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 After what he just said, you're paying for the whole bloody lot.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 I think we'd better start again. Ross, repeat after me. I, Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I, Ross...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Take thee, EM-I-LY...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Take thee,  Emily.  Like there'd beanybody else. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, till death partsus.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Looks like that might come any minute.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, until death parts us.Really, I do. Emily. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 May I have the rings?  Emily, place this ring onRoss's finger as a symbol of your bond everlasting. Ross, place this ring in Emily's hand as a symbol of the love that encircles you forever.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Happy to.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me greatpleasure to declare them husband and wife.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Minister	 You may kiss the bride.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	  This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 Just keep smiling.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, that went well. Yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 It could've been worse, he could've shot her.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasn't it?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	  You've spoiled everything! It's like anightmare! My friends and family are out there! How can I face them?! How can you do thisto me?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey, no matter what happens with Ross and Emily, we still getcake right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  That-that-that's all right, no honey, you take yourtime sweetie. I'll be right out here.  She'sjust fixing her makeup.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Emily	 I hate you!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 And, I love you!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 That's true, thanks dad.  People should be dancing! Huh? Hey, this isa party! Come on! Joey, dance!! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Yes, Waltham interiors.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Uh, hello, this is Ross Geller's personalphysician, Dr. Philange.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Who?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I've discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine, uh, nowwithout it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh women's names are interchangeable,through-through no fault of his own.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh my God, Phoebe.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No, not Phoebe, Dr. Philange. Oh no! You have it too!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hello? What kind of bitch hangs up on a doctor!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh wow, I hope you don't take this the wrong way but, I know we had plansto meet up tonight and, ugh, I'm just kinda worried about what it might do to ourfriendship.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know. How could we have let this happen?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Seven times!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ugh! Well, y'know, we were away...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 In a foreign, romantic country...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I blame London.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Bad London! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 So look umm, while we're st-still in London, I mean, we can keep doing itright?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, I don't see that we have a choice. But, when we're back home, wedon't do it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Only here.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Y'know, I saw a wine cellar downstairs...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'll meet you there in two minutes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Mon, honey, I gotta ask you something.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Now?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross said my name up there, I mean, come on, I just can't pretend thatdidn't happen can I?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, I-I don't know.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Monica, what should I do?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Just uh, do the right thing. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Toe the line. Thread the needle. Think outside the box! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Whoa, wait, listen, I think I'm just gonna talk to Ross about what he thinkit meant.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Wait. Rachel, no, he's married. Married! If you don't realise that, I can'thelp you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, you're right. You're right. You can't help me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Jack, is it all our fault? Were we bad parents?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	  Yes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Oh yeah, well who serves steak when there's no place to sit, I mean howare you supposed to eat this?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, what's up? 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  You and me, next dance?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Sweetheart, sweetheart...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 You know, we're all wondering who this Rachel is. Can you point herout to me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, you know what? Rachel.. She just left. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh.. Never mind. Who are you?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ra.... Er.. Barbra.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Red Barbra?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Where were you? We were supposed to meet in the wine cellar?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Forget it, that's off.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Why?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	  The next tour of the wine cellar will plan in two in-inminutes...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldn't eat meat untilshe has the babies!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, I figured we're in another country, so it doesn't count.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 That's true.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 The man's got a point.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi. Sorry, things aren't working out so well.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh no! It could be better, but it's gonna be okay, right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Of course, I mean, she's gonna get over this, y'know? I mean, soyou said my name! Y'know you just said it 'cause you saw me there, if you'd have seen acircus freak, you would've said, "I take thee circus freak." Y'know, it didn'tmean anything, it's just a mistake. It didn't mean anything. Right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! No! Of course it didn't mean anything! I mean, uh well, I can understandwhy Emily would think it meant something, y'know, because-because it was you...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Right...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 But it absolutely didn't.  It didn't!! Itdidn't!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ross, hey, the band's ready outside for your first dance withEmily, so...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Oh! Oh-oh, the band's ready! Well, I-I-we gotta do what the bandsays-I don't care about the stupid band!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 You spit on me man! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look, I'm sorry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Emily is kinda taking a long time, huh?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Y'know when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it wasbecause I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, right!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Get the hell out of there, y'know?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Emily? Emily? I'm coming in. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, look at that, same thing.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Listen, in the middle of everything if I scream the word,"Yippee!" just ignore me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, hello Rachel.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross said my name. Okay? My name. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 How did you get in here?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 If anybody asks, I'm your sister, Joan. Listen.C'mon, you guys. Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he stillloves me! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Your sister Joan is crazy.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Y'know what? Fine, Idon't care. Don't believe me, I know I'm right-do you guys want to go downstairsand get a drink?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes, we do. But, we have to change first.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yes, I want to change. And why-why don't you go down and get us a table?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, we'll be down in like five minutes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Fifteen minutes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hello? Oh, Pheebs!  It's Phoebe!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, yay...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Great...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hi, so what happened?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, Ross said my name.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, but I don't think that means anything.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, Pheebs, y'know what, let's look at this objectively all right? Ninthgrade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth grade he sees me ina two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey, listen, why don't we go change in my room?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 But my clothes are-ohh! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wow, you look...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 No time for that!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, dude, let me in. I got a girl out here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, I've got a girl in here.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No you don't, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, we're-we're hanging out in here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look, which one of us is gonna be having sex in there, me or you?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, I suppose I'd have to say you!! But, what if we're watching a moviein here?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. It's My Giant!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 My Giant? I love that movie!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 You really think this is okay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, Ross and Emily aren't gonna use it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, it's so beautiful. Ohh! Y'know, I-I don't know if I feel right aboutthis.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh Mon-Mon-Mon-Mon-look, this is the honeymoon suite. The roomexpects sex. The room would be disappointed if it didn't get sex. All of the otherhoneymoon suites would think it was a loser.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Emily?!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Nope, not under here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 You didn't find her?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No, I've looked everywhere!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, you couldn't have looked everywhere or else you would've found her!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, I think you should keep looking!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, for about 30 minutes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Or 45.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wow, in 45 minutes you can find her twice. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! For all I know, she's trying to find me but couldn't because I keptmoving around. No, from now on, I'm staying in one place.  Righthere.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, it's getting late.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, we're gonna go.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ugh, y'know, umm we gotta get up early and catch that plane for New York.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, it's a very large plane.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  That's cool.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But, we'll stay here with you.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thanks guys!  I really appreciatethis, y'know, but you don't have to rub my butt.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 We have to leave for New York in an hour.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know, I've been looking at those doors, they look pretty sound proof,don't you think?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 We can't do that that's insane. I mean 'A' he could wake up and 'B'y'know, let's go for it.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Em-Emily?  Em-Emily?  Emily!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 No.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 You can forget about Emily, she's not with us.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 We've come for her things.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wait, well wh-wh-wh-where is she?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 She's in hiding. She's utterly humiliated. She doesn't want to see youever again.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 We're very sad that it didn't work out between you and Emily, monkey.But, I think you're absolutely delicious.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Excuse me, I'm standing right here!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh yes, there you are.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hey-hey, you guys ohhurry up, get some, there's a whole cart outside... 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 Goodbye Geller.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Now, hold on! Hold on!  Look, look, your daughter and I aresupposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that I'm gonna be atthat airport and I hope that she'll be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachel's name, but itdidn't mean anything, Okay? She's-she's just a friend and that's all!  That's all! Now just tell Emily that I love her and that I can't imaginespending my life with anyone else. Please, promise me that you'll tell her that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 All right, I'll tell her.  Come on bugger face!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Waltham	  Call me.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Waltham	 You spend half your life in the bathroom, why don't you ever go outthe bloody window!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Y'know, maybe it's best that we never got to do it again.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, it kinda makes that-that one night special. Y'know, technically we still are over international waters.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'm gonna go to the bathroom, maybe I'll see you there in a bit?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 'Kay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Can I ask you something?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Uhh, no.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Felicity and I, we're watching My Giant, and I was thinking, "I'mnever gonna be as good an actor as that giant." Do you think I'm just wasting my lifewith this acting thing?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I mean, the giant is like five years younger than me, y'know, you think I'llever get there?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thanks man. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay man. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 But what about how much taller he is than me?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I mean, there's no way I can make myself taller now, y'know? And who knowswhat science will come up with in the future, but Chandler, what if I die an unsuccessful,regular sized man?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, Monica, wow you've been in the bathroom for like a half-hour.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Had the beef-tips, huh?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Rach! Rach!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi! What are you, what are you doing here?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I-I-I've been on Standby for a flight home for hours. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh, so no sign of Emily huh?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Not yet.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Gate Agent	
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Pretty soon I guess.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah. I'm sorry.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I just, I don't understand, I mean, how-how can she do this? Y'know, what, amI, am I like a complete idiot for thinking that she'd actually show up?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, you're not an idiot, Ross. You're a guy very much in love.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Same difference.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Gate Agent	
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I get it! Well, that's that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, you know what, I think you should go.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, I do. I think you should go, by yourself, get some distance, clearyour head, I think it'd be really good.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, I don't, I don't, I don't know...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, come on Ross! I think it would be really good for you!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I could, yeah, I can do that.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I can't, I can't even believe her! No, y'know what, I am, I am gonna go!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Good!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I know, why not?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Right!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Right!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Y'know-thanks! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, I'll see you back at home, if I ever get a flight out of here.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, well...nah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What? Wait, what?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Why don't you come, I mean, I-I have two tickets, why not?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well-well, I don't know Ross-really?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, it'll be great! You can, you can lay on the beach and I can cryover my failed marriage. See-see how I make jokes?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No really, I mean, I mean, God, I could use a friend.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh wow, uh okay, uh maybe. Umm, yes, I can do that!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Cool!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Come on! Here. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, okay, we're going. Yeah.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ah! Ah! I forgot my jacket!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, wait-wait-wait...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 You tell them to wait!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Wait! Wait!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Emily.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh no-no-no! Oh-no!  No! No!Emily!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Air Hostess	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And uh,  he will have a white wine spritzer. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Air Hostess	 Okay, good. Thank you. I'll be back shortly, all right?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right. Woo!  Hey,look at that, the airport's moving.  Hey, are wemoving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? They said they were gonnawait!  Miss? Yeah, does the captain know that we'removing? Oh my... Ross, you better be under the wheels of thisthing!!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hi!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  You ate meat!   You hadsex! 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No we didn't!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know you didn't, I was talking about Monica.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Phoebe, I did not have sex.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 This pregnancy is throwing me all off.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right, I'm gonna go say hi the chick and the duck.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, me too!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Why would you need to say hi to them, you've been feeding them for four days?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh right, maybe I'll just go home. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, we certainly are alone.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes! Good thing we have that, 'Not in New York' rule.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Right. Umm, listen since we're-we-re on that subject, umm, I just wanted totell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, what with mybrother getting married and that guy thinking I was Ross's mother...
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Right.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, an-anyway, I just-that night meant a lot to me, I guess I'm justtrying to say thanks.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh. Y'know, that night meant a lot to me too, and it wasn't because I wasin a bad place or anything, it just meant a lot to me 'cause, you're really hot! Is thatokay?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  That's okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And I'm cute too.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 And you're cute too.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Thank you!  All right, I gotta go unpack.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay.
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Bye. 
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I'm still on London time, does that count?
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 That counts!
04	23-24	0423-24	The One With Ross's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, good! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 Friends. Family. We are gathered to celebrate here today the joyousunion of Ross and Emily.  Now Ross, repeat after me. I Ross...
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I Ross...
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 Take thee, Emily...
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Take thee, Rachel... Emily.  Emily.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	  Uhh...Shall Igo on?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	  He-he said Rachel, right? Do youthink I should go up there?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Emily	 Yes, yes, do go on.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 I think wed better start again. Ross, repeat after me. I,Ross
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I, Ross
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 Take thee, EM-I-LY
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Take thee,  Emily.  Likethered be anybody else. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, till deathparts us.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 As my lawfully wedded wife, in sickness and in health, until death partsus. Really, I do. Emily. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 May I have the rings?  Emily, place this ringon Rosss finger as a symbol of your bond everlasting.  Ross, place this ring in Emilys hand as a symbol of the love that encirclesyou forever.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Happy too.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 Ross and Emily have made their declarations and it gives me greatpleasure to declare them husband and wife.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Yay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Minister	 You may kiss the bride.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Geller	  This is worse than when he married the lesbian.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Emily	 Just keep smiling.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Okay.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Well, that went well. Yeah.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 It couldve been worse, he couldve shot her.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  That uh, that was pretty funny. Wasnt it?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Emily	  Youve spoiled everything!Its like a nightmare! My friends and family are out there! How can I face them?! Howcan you do this to me?!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	  Hey, no matter what happens with Ross and Emily, we stillget cake right?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  That-that-thats all right, no honey, you takeyour time sweetie. Ill be right out here.  Shes just fixing her makeup.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Emily	 I hate you!!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 And, I love you!! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Geller	 Boy, bad time to say the wrong name, huh Ross?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Thats true, thanks dad.  People should be dancing! Huh? Hey,this is a party! Come on! Joey, dance!! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 Yes, Waltham interiors.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	  Uh, hello, this is Ross Gellerspersonal physician, Dr. Philange.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 Who?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah, Ive discovered that Ross forgot to take his brain medicine,uh, now without it, uh, in the brain of Ross, uh womens names are interchangeable,through-through no fault of his own.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh my God, Phoebe.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 No, not Phoebe, Dr. Philange. Oh no! You have it too!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Hello?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Hey.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Hey.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh wow, I hope you dont take this the wrong way but, I know wehad plans to meet up tonight and, ugh, Im just kinda worried about what it might doto our friendship.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 I know. How could we have let this happen?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Seven times!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Ugh! Well, yknow, we were away
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 In a foreign, romantic country
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 I blame London.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Bad London! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 So look umm, while were st-still in London, I mean, we can keepdoing it right?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, I dont see that we have a choice. But, when wereback home, we dont do it.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Only here.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yknow, I saw a wine cellar downstairs
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Ill meet you there in two minutes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Okay! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Mon, honey, I gotta ask you something.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	  Now?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Ross said my name up there, I mean, come on, I just cant pretendthat didnt happen can I?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Oh, I-I dont know.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Monica, what should I do?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Just uh, do the right thing. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 What?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Toe the line. Thread the needle. Think outside the box! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Whoa, wait, listen, I think Im just gonna talk to Ross about whathe think it meant.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Wait. Rachel, no, hes married. Married! If you dont realizethat, I cant help you.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay, youre right. Youre right. You cant help me.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Geller	 Jack, is it all our fault? Were we bad parents?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	  Yes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Geller	 Oh yeah, well who serves steak when theres no place to sit, Imean how are you supposed to eat this?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Hey, whats up? 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Where were you? We were supposed to meet in the wine cellar?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Forget it, thats off.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Why?!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	  The next tour of the wine cellar will plan in two in-inminutes
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Joey, what are you doing? You promised Phoebe you wouldnt eat meatuntil she has the babies!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Well, I figured were in another country, so it doesnt count.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Thats true.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 The mans got a point.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Hi. Sorry, things arent working out so well.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Oh no! It could be better, but its gonna be okay, right?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Of course, I mean, shes gonna get over this, yknow?I mean, so you said my name! Yknow you just said it cause you saw me there, ifyoud have seen a circus freak, you wouldve said, "I take thee circusfreak." Yknow, it didnt mean anything, its just a mistake. Itdidnt mean anything. Right?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 No! No! Of course it didnt mean anything! I mean, uh well, I canunderstand why Emily would think it meant something, yknow, because-because it wasyou
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Right
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 But it absolutely didnt.  Itdidnt!! It didnt!!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	  Ross, hey, the bands ready outside for your firstdance with Emily, so
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  Oh! Oh-oh, the bands ready! Well, I-I-we gotta do whatthe band saysI dont care about the stupid band!!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 You spit on me man! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Look, Im sorry.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Emily is kinda taking a long time, huh?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	  Yknow when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding,it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Oh, right!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Get the hell out of there, yknow?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  Emily? Emily? Im coming in. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Well, look at that, same thing.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Listen, in the middle of everything if I scream the word,"Yippee!" just ignore me.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Oh my God, Rachel! Hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh, hello Rachel.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Ross said my name. Okay? My name. Ross said my name up there thatobviously means that he still loves me!  Okay, dontbelieve me, I know Im rightdo you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yes, we do. But, we have to change first.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Yes, I want to change. And why-why dont you go down and get us atable?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, well be down in like five minutes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	  Fifteen minutes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Hello? Oh, Pheebs!  Its Phoebe!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh, yay
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Great
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Hi, so what happened?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Well, Ross said my name.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, but I dont think that means anything.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay, Pheebs, yknow what, lets look at this objectively allright? Ninth grade, right? The obsession starts. All right? The summer after ninth gradehe sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. So then
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	  Hey, listen, why dont we go change in my room?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 But my clothes areohh! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Wow, you look
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 No time for that!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Hey, dude, let me in. I got a girl out here!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, Ive got a girl in here.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 No you dont, I just saw you go in there with Monica!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, were-were hanging out in here!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Look, which one of us is gonna be having sex in there, me or you?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, I suppose Id have to say you!! But, what if werewatching a movie in here?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Which we are, and-and we already paid for it. Its My Giant!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 My Giant? I love that movie!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 You really think this is okay?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, Ross and Emily arent gonna use it.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Oh, its so beautiful. Ohh! Yknow, I-I dont know if Ifeel right about this.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh Mon-Mon-Mon-Mon-look, this is the honeymoon suite. The roomexpects sex. The room would be disappointed if it didnt get sex. All of theother honeymoon suites would think it was a loser.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Okay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Okay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  Emily?!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Nope, not under here!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 You didnt find her?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 No, Ive looked everywhere!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Well, you couldnt have looked everywhere or else youwouldve found her!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Yeah, I think you should keep looking!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, for about 30 minutes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Or 45.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Wow, in 45 minutes you can find her twice. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 No! For all I know, shes trying to find me but couldnt becauseI kept moving around. No, from now on, Im staying in one place.  Right here.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Well, its getting late.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, were gonna go.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Actually, do you guys mind staying here for a while?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Ugh, yknow, umm we gotta get up early and catch that plane for NewYork.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, its a very large plane.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	  Thats cool.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 But, well stay here with you.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Thanks guys!  I reallyappreciate this, yknow, but you dont have to rub my butt.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 We have to leave for New York in an hour.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 I know, Ive been looking at those doors, they look pretty soundproof, dont you think?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 We cant do that thats insane. I mean A hecould wake up and B yknow, lets go for it.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Em-Emily?  Em-Emily? Emily! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 No.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 You can forget about Emily, shes not with us.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 Weve come for her things.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Wait, well wh-wh-wh-where is she?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 Shes in hiding. Shes utterly humiliated. Shedoesnt want to see you ever again.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 Were very sad that it didnt work out between you andEmily, monkey. But, I think youre absolutely delicious.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 Excuse me, Im standing right here!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	 Oh yes, there you are.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	  Hey-hey, you guysoh hurry up, get some, theres a whole cart outside 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 Goodbye Geller.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Now, hold on! Hold on!  Look, look, your daughter and I aresupposed to leave tonight for our honeymoon, now-now you-you tell her that Im gonnabe at that airport and I hope that shell be there too! Oh yeah, I said Rachelsname, but it didnt mean anything, Okay? Shes-shes just a friend andthats all!  Thats all! Now just tell Emily thatI love her and that I cant imagine spending my life with anyone else. Please,promise me that youll tell her that.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 All right, Ill tell her.  Come on bugger face!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mrs. Waltham	  Call me.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Mr. Waltham	 You spend half your life in the bathroom, why dont you evergo out the bloody window!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Yknow, maybe its best that we never got to do it again.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, it kinda makes that-that one night special. Yknow, technically we still are over international waters.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Im gonna go to the bathroom, maybe Ill see you there in abit?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Kay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Can I ask you something?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Uhh, no.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Felicity and I, were watching My Giant, and I was thinking,"Im never gonna be as good an actor as that giant." Do you think Imjust wasting my life with this acting thing?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 No.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 I mean, the giant is like five years younger than me, yknow, youthink Ill ever get there?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yes.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Thanks man. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Okay man. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 But what about how much taller he is than me?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 I mean, theres no way I can make myself taller now, yknow? Andwho knows what science will come up with in the future, but Chandler, what if I die anunsuccessful, regular sized man?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Hey, Monica, wow youve been in the bathroom for like a half-hour.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 I know!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Had the beef-tips, huh?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Hey!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	  You ate meat!   Youhad sex! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 No we didnt!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 I know you didnt, I was talking about Monica.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Phoebe, I did not have sex.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 This pregnancy is throwing me all off.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 All right, Im gonna go say hi the chick and the duck.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh, me too!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Joey	 Why would you need to say hi to them, youve been feeding them forfour days?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh right, maybe Ill just go home. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Well, we certainly are alone.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Yes! Good thing we have that, Not in New York rule.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Right. Umm, listen since were-we-re on that subject, umm, I justwanted to tell you that uh, well, I-I was going through a really hard time in London, whatwith my brother getting married and that guy thinking I was Rosss mother
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Right.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Well, an-anyway, I justthat night meant a lot to me, I guessIm just trying to say thanks.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh. Yknow, that night meant a lot to me too, and it wasntbecause I was in a bad place or anything, it just meant a lot to me cause,youre really hot! Is that okay?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	  Thats okay.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 And Im cute too.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 And youre cute too.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Thank you!  All right, I gotta go unpack.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 Okay.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Bye. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	  Im still on London time, does that count?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Monica	 That counts!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Chandler	 Oh, good! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Rach! Rach!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	  Hi!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Hi! What are you, what are you doing here?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Well, I-I-Ive been on Standby for a flight home for hours. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Oh.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Ohh, so no sign of Emily huh?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Not yet.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 So umm, what time are you supposed to leave?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Gate Agent	  This is the last call for Flight 1066 toAthens. The last call.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Pretty soon I guess.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah. Im sorry.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I just, I dont understand, I mean, how-how can she do this?Yknow, what, am I, am I like a complete idiot for thinking that shed actuallyshow up?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 No, youre not an idiot, Ross. Youre a guy very much in love.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Same difference.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Gate Agent	  All ticketed passengers for Flight 1066 toAthens should now be on board.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I get it! Well, thats that.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 No, you know what, I think you should go.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 What?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, I do. I think you should go, by yourself, get some distance, clearyour head, I think itd be really good.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Oh, I dont, I dont, I dont know
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, come on Ross! I think it would be really good for you!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I could, yeah, I can do that.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I cant, I cant even believe her! No, yknow what, I am, Iam gonna go!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Good!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 I know, why not?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Right!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Right?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Right!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Yknowthanks! 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay, Ill see you back at home, if I ever get a flight out ofhere.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Yeah, wellnah.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 What? Wait, what?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Why dont you come, I mean, I-I have two tickets, why not?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Well-well, I dont know Rossreally?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, itll be great! You can, you can lay on the beach and Ican cry over my failed marriage. See-see how I make jokes?
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 No really, I mean, I mean, God, I could use a friend.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh wow, uh okay, uh maybe. Umm, yes, I can do that!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Okay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Cool!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 All right!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Come on!  Here. 
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, okay, were going. Yeah.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Ah! Ah! I forgot my jacket!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, wait-wait-wait
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 You tell them to wait!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Okay. Wait! Wait!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Emily.
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Ross	 Oh no-no-no! Oh-no!  No! No!Emily!
05	01	0501	The One After Ross Says Rachel	Rachel	 Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh,  he will have a white wine spritzer. Woo!  Hey,look at that, the airports moving. Hey, are we moving?! Are we moving? Why are we moving? Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does thecaptain know that were moving?  Oh my God. Oh, my gosh.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 You look cute in bubbles.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Ehh, you're just liquored up.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Hey, it's me! I'm comin' in!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 I've had a very long, hard day.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Ahh, I'm gonna go get some chicken. Want some?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Ahh, no thanks. No chicken, bye-bye then.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Okay.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 You sure? Some extra crispy? Dirty rice? Beans?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 For the last time no! Get out! Get out, Joey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 All right!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Are you okay? I'm so sorry, he wouldn't leave. He kept asking me aboutchicken.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Chicken? I could eat some chicken.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Hey Joe!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Yeah, can I get a 3-piece, some cole slaw, some beans, and aCoke-(Yelps in 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Hey, Pheebs!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Mornin' Pheebs!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 I have to tell you this story. Okay, I was coming over here and thisdriver
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	  Was his name Angus? 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 What?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Oh, he was this cab driver we had in London.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Oh. Ha-ha-ha. All right, anyway
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Wait, what that place, that pub he took us too?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Uh, The Wheatsheaf.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Yeah-yeah-yeah, and they had that beer! That uh
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Bodington's!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Bodington's! Woohoo! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Ooh! Ahh, Pheebs, was gonna tell a story.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Yeah, so, he had a really funny hatI don't want to talk about it.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	  Hey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Hey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Hey, Ross, Bodington's!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Yeah! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 That was good beer.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Ohh
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Y'know, I'd walk back to London for another frosty one of those badboys.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Y'know, I think they have those at that British pub near the trade center.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Later! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Isn't Rachel supposed to be back by now?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Yeah, but her plane got delayed in Athens. But actually, she should be here by now.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Oh, so-so you talked to her. Did she, did she sound mad?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 No, but she likes me. You abandoned her on a plane to Greece.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Okay, I did not abandon Rachel! Okay? Emily showed up at theairport! I had to go after her! I mean, I-I did what I had to do! She's my wife!Rachel is my wife! Y'knowEmily! Emily, is my wife! Man, what is that?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 So you still hadn't heard from Emily?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 No, not since I lost her at the airport.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 I can't believe she can out run you man!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 HEY, SHE'S FAST!! OKAY?!!  Oh! You-you think you can be beatme? Let's go! Outside!!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	  Hi!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Hey! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Rach, Rach, I am so sorry. I am so-so sorry.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh Ross, come on! You just did what you had to do.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 That's it? You're not mad? I mean, it must've been terrible.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Terrible? Hell, I was in Greece! That was a nice hotel! Nice beach, metthe nice people. Not to shabby for Rachel. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 So, what? That's it?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, yeah! We're cool. Totally cool.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Oh, thanks. Oh, you're the best. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh no, you're the best.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	  Ohh, I gotta go to the flower store!  Check it out, no one will tell me where Emily is, so I'm gonna send 72 long-stem,red roses to Emily's parent's house, one for each day that I've known and loved her. Thatoughta get her talking to me again.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Oh, Ross, when you make out card; be sure to make it out to, EM-I-LY.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Rach, that's great! It's so good that you had a good time in Greece!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 What?! I didn't have a good time in Greece! Ross abandoned me! Okay, Icouldn't get a plane out, so I had to stay in their honeymoon suite with people coming upto me all the time going, "Oh, Mrs. Geller, why are you crying?" I mean, it wassooo humiliating. I felt like such an idiot! I mean, it's all my fault! And you know why,because I make very bad decisions.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Oh that's not true.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yes it is! It is true! I went, I went after Ross in stupid London.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 London is stupid! Stupid!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Phoebe, you were right. I should've never gone to London, and from nowon you make all of my decisions for me.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Oh No, I did that for someone once and I'm not comfortable havingthat kind of power and control over someone's life.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 I'll do it!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 That's fine. So Monica, you are now in control of my love life.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Okay, I gotta go to work.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 And uh, Rachel, glad to have you back. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Pheebs!  Alwaysa pleasure. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Oh, Rachel, sweetie, look, here's a really cute picture of Joey and youat the reception.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Ohh, he's married! Ross is married. I can'tI still can't believeit. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Honey, sweetie, by the edges.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Ohh. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 I mean it's my fault.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Sweetie! Edges! Fingers! Smudgey! Pictures!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh my God! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Okay. That's okay. I-I know that you're very upset right now. I know, Iknow that wasn't about me.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	  I bet it was about her a little.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 If you would stop thinking about Ross for one minute you would noticethat there are great guys everywhere! I mean, look! Look, Gunther!  I mean, he's nice, he's cute.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah, I guess Gunther is kinda
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	  Oh, what about that guy over there?  Remember? That is the guy you flirted with atthe counter that time.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh, I don't know. I don't know.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 You're going to talk to him! Y'know what? We made a deal, I make yourdecisions and I say you're going to talk to him.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 All right, you're the boss. I guess I gotta do what you tell me.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Say that to him and you're golden. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Hey!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Hey, Pheebs!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 We got out pictures back from London.  Here's all of usat the Tower of London.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	  Oh! Here we all are! Yeah, there's Ross andJoey and you and me. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 All right, y'know what, we've been talking about London too muchhaven't we?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 No. I'm sorry. It's just 'cause I couldn't be there. 'Cause all I everget to do now is pregnant stuff, it just bums me out.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Sorry.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 What happened?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, y'know, a little of this, a little of that. Got myself a datetomorrow night.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 See, didn't I tell you?! You're getting over Ross already!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Gunther	  Get out!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 What took you so long?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 I got caught up and work, but I'm quitting tomorrow.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Oh, good. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 So, thanks for having me over! Rach.  Pheebs. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	  See ya!!  What the hell was that?!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Probably some y'know, European good-bye thing he picked up in London.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 That's not European!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Well, it felt French.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh God, I really had a good time!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Dave	 Yeah, me too.  So, I guess this is it.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah. Umm, unless you wanna come inside?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Dave	 Yeah!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Okay. Oh, uh, wait a minute, y'know what? I uh, I can't decide this.Umm, okay, just hold on a second.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Dave	 Okay, yeah!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Umm, hi!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Hi.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Is Monica around? I-I have to ask her something.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 She's doing her laundry.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 What's that? 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 It came in the mail today, it's uh, 72 long-stemmed red roses, one foreach day that I've known and loved Emily, cut up into mulch!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh, honey that's awful.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Oh, it's not so bad. Monica's gonna make potpourri! I think I'm gonna gowander out in the rain for a while.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 But, it's not raining.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 I can't catch a break!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Y'know what Ross? You're not going anywhere. You're gonna sit righthere. I'm gonna make you a cup of tea and we're gonna talk this thing whole out. Allright?  Hey, Dave!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Dave	 Yeah?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Umm, listen, I'm gonna need to take a rain check, my roommate is justreally sick. Okay? Bye!  Honey, listen, I know, I knowthings seem so bad right now.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	  Rach? Can I talk to for just a minute? I-I droppedsome socks.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 What is the matter with you?! Do you want to fall into the trap? Do youwant to fall into the trap?!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Ohh! You did not drop any socks!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 I just ran into Dave and he told me that you blew him off! I mean, youlisten to me! Now, I'm calling the shots! I say you leave Ross alone and go get Dave! Whatthe hell were you trying to do?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, ultimately, I was trying y'know, I-I wantedtell him y'know,that I'm still in love with him.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	  What?!! You cannot tell him that!!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Why? Why not?! People love to hear that!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 I make the decisions, and I say no.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, y'know what, no, you do not make my decisions because y'know what,you're fired.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 You can't fire me. I make your decisions and I say,"I'm not fired!" Ha!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Rachel!! Come on! Let me in!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	  Havin' some trouble?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Rachel locked the door.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 I'll kick that door in if you give me a little sugar.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Rachel! Let me in! Rachel!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Thank you. Rachel, can I talk to you outside for a sec?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 No.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 I really need to talk to you.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, then talk!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Okay, I will. Remember that thing that we just discussed that you wantedto do?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yes!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 What thing?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Well, Rachel wants to take swing dance lessons. Which I think is areally stupid idea! It's dangerous, she's never gonna get what she wants, and who knowswho she might  end up hurting.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Monica's right, swing dancing can be tricky. I'm gonna use the phone. Igotta cancel those five giant teddy bears I sent to Emily.  MyGod, think of the massacre.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 I'm gonna do it.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 All right, Rachel, I know-I know you think I'm crazy, please, before youtell him you love him, just-just try to find one person who thinks this is a good idea.Because I bet you, you can't.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 But I
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Please!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 All right, fine.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Joey, I'm in!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	  All right. Good deal.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Pheebs! Hey Pheebs!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Uh, okay, Pheebs?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Umm, y'know how the other day you were talking about how you didn't get togo to London and how you were kinda feeling left out?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 All right, well, we felt really bad about that so we decided we should alltake a little trip together!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Ohh, that's so nice! How great! Well, where? Where's the trip?!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Well, we thought we would all go to a picnic , in CentralPark!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	  Central Park!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Yeah, all of us! All day!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 That sucks! That's not a trip! I just came from the park! What are wegonna high five about at the stupid Central Park? "Well, it's right by my house, allright!" 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Well, I'm gonna go home and bask in the triumph of my Central Parkidea. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	  Hey-whoa-whoa-whoa!! Ho-ho-hold on a sec there, Mr.Kissey! Y'know, I've been meaning to talk to you about this whole, little, new Europeanthing you got going on, and I just need to tell you that it makes me very uncomfortableand I justy'knowstop it!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 I was just trying to bring a little culture to the group.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 That's fine, just don't bring it in my mouth.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Makes me wanna puke!  
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Hey everybody, Pheebs is here!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Phoebe!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Hey, Pheebs!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Phoebe, woo!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Okay, woo! Hi.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Okay, Pheebs, we decided the picnic idea was a little Y'know, itdidn't have any It-it, well it blew. So, we thought, that this afternoon that wewould all go away for the whole weekend to, Atlantic City!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Ooh, Atlantic City! Oh, that's a great plan! Who's plan was that?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Mine!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Wait! It was my plan.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Nooo, I said we needed a new plan.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 And, I came up with Atlantic City.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Which, is the new plan!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Okay, well, why don't we all meet upstairs in an hour?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Okay! Ooh-ahh, I'm gonna go pack. I'm gonna go pack my ass off!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Come on Rach, let's go.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah, y'know what? I'm-I'm gonna meet you upstairs in a minute.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 No! Rachel, you didn't find anyone so you can't tell him.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Well, y'know what, that doesn't matter.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Okay, Rachel, do you have any idea how painful it is to tell someonethat you love them and not have them say it back?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah, I-I don't care.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Okay. I-I can't watch. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 What 'cha readin'?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 The paper.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Yeah, what's it about?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Events from around the globe.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Okay. Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have totalk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they'rewrong. I mean, and you know how people can be wrong.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Sure. Once, at work I-I thought carbon dating was fossilized
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Okay, Ross, I'm really trying to tell you something here.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Yeah. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Okay.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Go ahead.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Umm, okay, I think I'm-I'm just gonna-just gonna say it. Just gonna sayit. Uhh,  I'm still in love with you Ross.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Wow. Umm Huh I'm-I'm not sure what to do with that right now.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 What? What? Was that a joke? 'Cause it's mean.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	  I'm so dead serious. I'm totally serious.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Why are you laughing?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Because , because, I just heard it. I heard it, and it'sridiculous! I mean, you're married. You're-you're married and it's just ridiculous, andit's like, it's like when said it, I sort of like, I floated up out of my body, y'know?And, and-and then I heard myself say it and then the floating Rachel  was like,"You are such an idiot!"
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Well, well I am married. Even though I haven't spoken to my wifesince the wedding.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	  I'm sorry, that's not funny.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Actually, it kinda is. My wife won't return my calls. I don't know wheremy wife is.  "Hey Ross, where's the Mrs.?" Don't know! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Oh God, ohh, okay, y'know what, do you think ah, do you think that youjust forget that I told you this?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Well, I kinda half to. I mean, because the thing is
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 The thing is y'know, that you're married to Emily.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 That is what the thing is.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? I mean was thatjust the stupidest thing, me telling you that?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 No. No. No, I'm-I'm glad you did. Look, if nothing else, it's-it's alwaysgreat when someone tells you they love you.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 That's what I said! Thank you for being so nice. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 No thank you for Thank you.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Okay, let's go!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Atlantic City!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Atlantic City, baby! Let's roll some bones! Hey Joey, high-five forrolling bones! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Joey	 Uh, Pheebs, you're leaking?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Oh my God! You're water broke!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	The Guys	 Ohh!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 All right. Well, don't worry, I call shotgun! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	All	 Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Wait-wait!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Pheebs! We have to take you to the hospital now!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Ross	 Pheebs, Pheebs, the babies are coming now.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Rachel	 High-five, the babies are coming! 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Phoebe	 Wait, wait, remember when my water broke? 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 I can't believe Phoebe's gonna have her babies!
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 I know, it's beautiful. Amazing.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Y'know what else I can't believe? I had to kiss Phoebe and Rachelevery time I left a room, I mean it's too bad they didn't see us having sex.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 Do you know anything about women?
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 No.
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Monica	 That's all right. 
05	02	0502	The One With All The Kissing	Chandler	 Okay. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	  Hi.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Nurse	 Hi.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Hi, yeah, hi! I'm umm, Phoebe Buffay, and I have babies coming out ofme.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Nurse	 Okay. Have you started having contractions?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Not yet. Umm, I heard they really hurt, do they hurt?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Nurse	 Well
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 It's all right.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Nurse	 Now, which of you is the father? 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh no, none of them are the father. The father is my brother.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Nurse	  Okay
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 I am so gonna miss watching you freak people out like that!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Okay, uh Pheebs, quick. Look! This  is for the babies tolook at someday, so is-is there anything you want to say? Y'know before it all starts?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, umm, hi kids! Um, it's me, Aunt Phoebe. I can't wait to seeyou. Please don't hurt me! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Hey, what took you guys so long? Your cab left when ours did!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Well, we-we had to go back because I forget my jacket.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 That's right.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 You-you're not wearing a jacket.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Oh man! I did it again!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	  Okay, so umm, somebody has to call Frank and Alice.  And then my mom wants toknow--Joey, what are you doing?!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 I gotta get the before shot!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Hi, Pheebs? Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that yourdoctor is late is because uh, she's not coming.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 What?!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Apparently she fell in the shower and hit her head.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh my God, she's so stupid!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Look, Pheebs-Pheebs, it's gonna be okay.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 That's easy for you to say, I don't see three kids coming out yourvagina!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Honey, listen, y'know what? The nurse said the doctor is wonderful.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Yeah, he's head of the department.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 All rightOoh! Oh dead God, save me! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 What?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I'm having my first contraction!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Oh no.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Ooh, it's not bad.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Okay.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Oh!  And so the miracle of life begins, andaaiiyyyeeee! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Hey! You okay?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Ooh, something hurts!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Ooh, it's sympathy pains. Ohh, that's so sweet!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Are they? I didn't know I cared that much.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Hello.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Hi! Phoebe, I'm Dr. Harad, I'm going to be delivering your babies. Iwant you to know, you're gonna be in good hands. I've been doing this for a long time.I'll be back in a minute to do your internal, in the meantime, just relax becauseeverything here looks great. And also, I love Fonzie. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Did he just say, he loves Fonzie?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 That's what it sounded like.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 All right
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	  Hey!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	All	 Hey!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	  Hey! Am I late? Am I late? Nobody came out yet, right?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 No-no-no! We haven't started yet. Where's Alice?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Uh, Delaware. She's on her way though, so until she gets here, I'm gonnabe your coach. But don't worry, she told me all about the la-Mazada stuff.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Yeah, that's when if you get the babies out by the end of the month,they give you 2% financing.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yeah.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	  Monica? You gonna be very proud of me. I just got us dateswith two unbelievably cute nurses.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Oh my!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 They're male nurses.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Not in my head.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! What do you say?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Umm.  Umm. Umm. I don't thinkso.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 What? What are you talking about?! You-you're the one who's been tellingme to get over Ross and move on. I'm moving on, and you're moving on with me. Come on,give me one good reason why you don't wanna go.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Umm, why don't you give me something that would be a good reasonand-and then I'll tell you if it's true.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 What?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Harder than it sounds. Isn't it?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Okay, you're coming with me, and I also told them that if we're stillhere when they get off that we'll go down to the cafeteria and have some Jell-Owith them.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	  Yep! There's always room for Jell-O
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Joey, how do you make that dirty?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Oh, it's easy. Yeah, I-I can do it with anything. Watch uh,  Grandma's chicken salad
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	  Ross! Get a shot of this.  Hey babies! These are the headlines on the day youwere born! Okay, now girl baby turn away and boy babies  Check itout, huh?! This is what naked women looked like the month you were born. All right, nowlet's dive right into the good stuff. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, I'm having another one! This one doesn't hurt eitherOoh,yes it does! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ooh!  Oh, I was kinda hoping thatwas it.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Hey, where are Monica and Rachel anyway?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Oh, a couple of nurses asked them out. Maybe they're with them.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Really? Male nurses?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Yeah, I was bummed too.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 So they're going on dates? When?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 I think Saturday.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	  What's with him?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Umm, sympathy pains. I thought it was really sweet at first, but now Ithink he's just trying to steal my thunder.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	  Okay!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Hey.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Let's see what we got here. Ohh, y'know, Fonzie dated triplets.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 This-this Fonzie person you keep referring too, is that uh, is thatanother doctor?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Oh no-no-no. Fonzie is the nickname of Arthur Fonzerelli. The Fonz.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 All right.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 It's not that weird, is it?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 It's very weird! I don't want some guy down there telling me, I'my'know, dilatedamundo!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 To be fair, he doesnt seem to be impersonating Fonzie
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	  What are you doing?!! Why are you defending him?! Justget me another doctor! One who is not crazy and who is not Fonzie!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Again, it's not that he
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	  Oh-hey-hey-hey! There you are!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Umm, listen there's something I think you should know.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Oh, is this about you-you dating the nurse? Yeah, Joey already toldme, and I am so-so fine. I mean, you and I we're just, y'know, we're nothing, we'regoofin' around.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Umm, actually I was about to tell you that I was, I was going to get outof it, but hey, if we're just goofing around then uh, maybe I will go out with him.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Fine! Maybe I will too!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	  Hey, you guys! Lookwhat I found in the giiiiiiift shop.  Get up! Get up! Get up! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Okay, Phoebe, this Dr. Oberman. He has no strong feelings about Fonzie orany of the Happy Days gang.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Hi! And you're going into what grade?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Oberman	 Umm, I'm actually a first year resident, but I get that a lot, yousee, I-I graduated early
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	  Uh-huh, me too. Ross, maybe I should've specified thatI'd be needing a grown up doctor. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Oberman	 Oh no, I'm fully qualified to
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Shh! Doogie, shh! Doesn't anybody understand that I'm gonna be havingbabies soon? Huh? Go! Go little boy, go!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Oh cool! You made him cry!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 Mr. Tribbiani, I'm afraid you've got kidney stones.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Umm, well, what else could it be?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 It's kidney stones.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Or?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 Kidney stones!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 All right, you're getting there. Oh, and y'know, these babies arevery, very lucky.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 They are. Why?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 They have the honor of being born on The Fonz's half-birthday.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Happy birthday!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Just-just to clarify, I'm not Fonzie. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Honey, y'know I just gotta tell you, I think this is such a terrificthing you're having these babies for Frank and Alice.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I know, it is.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Can I tell you a little secret?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I want to keep one. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Ohh, I'm gonna be on the news!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Okay, Phoebe, honey, you gotta be kidding. I mean, you know youcannot keep one of these babies!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Why not?! Maybe I can, you don't know!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yes! Yes! Yes, I do! I do know! Frank and Alice are gonna want to keep allof their children!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Maybe not! Y'know? Seriously, three babies are a handful maybe they'rey'know, looking for a chance to unload one of them. Listen, I-I hate to miss anopportunity just because I didn't ask! Y'know?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Phoebe, no! This is, this is insane.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh, just ask him!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Me?!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I can't ask him! Do you have any idea how inappropriate thatwould be?! All I'm saying is just talk to Frank. Okay? Just, y'know, feel him out!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 No! Forget it! I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of hiskids!!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 You're right. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Tell him it's for you.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Feeling a little better sweetie?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Well, maybe a little. I wish you hadn't seen me throw up.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Me too.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	  Hey! I just heard. What's up?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 Kidney stones! Now, ordinarily Mr. Tribbiani, we try to break upthe stones up with shock waves, but they're to close to the bladder now. Which means wecan either wait for you to pass them or else go up the urethra
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	  Whoa-whoa! No-no-no-no-no, nothing is going up! Okay? Up,up is not an optionwhat's a urethra?  Areyou crazy?!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	  So did you ask him?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 No, I haven't had a chance to be alone with him yet.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Well, I'm kinda on a clock here.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	  Oh Fonzie.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Y'know who I always liked? Mork.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Undo it. Undo it. Undo it.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Fonzie met Mork. Mork froze Fonzie.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah, but umm Yes, but, Fonzie was already cool, so he wasn'thurt, right?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Yeah, that's right.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	  Hey!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Hi!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	  How are you doing?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Okay, doctor says any minute now.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Hey, y'know, Alice is gonna be here so soon, you couldn't just like do mea favor and like, like hold them in?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Sorry Frank, I'm kinda in the middle of the last favor you asked me todo.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Male Nurse	 Hey!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Hi!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Male Nurse	 Rachel.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Monica, this is Dan , one of the guys that we're gonna begoing out with on Saturday.  Uh Dan, Monica.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 Nice to meet you.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Hello Dan! I'm really looking forward to Saturday night! Really,really!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 So Dan, nurse not a doctor huh? Kinda girlie isn't it?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Chandler!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 Nah that's okay. I'm just doing this to put myself through medical school.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Oh.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 And it didn't feel so girlie during the Gulf War.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Sure.  And listen, thanks for doing that for us, by the way.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 So, why wait 'til Saturday, are you free tomorrow?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 Sure! I'll get somebody to cover my shift.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Oh, great!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	  Hey, how 'bout it? You, me, Saturday night?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Delivery Room Nurse	 No.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 All right. Very good.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oo, this is a big one. Eww! Arghhhh!!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Ohh, get these things out of me!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Breathe! Breathe! Breathe throw the pain.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 I want the drugs Ross, I want the drugs! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 I do too! I do too!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Argh!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Argh!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Argh!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 Argh!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yeah, I love you. Okay, bye!  Hi!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Hi!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 That was Alice's mom, she said she left five hours ago. She should behere by now!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Oh, honey, dont worry. She's gonna make it on time.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yeah.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah. So Frank, three babies. Whew, that just seems like a lot, huh?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	  Not to me.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah, fair enough.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Okay, you're at ten centimeters. Time to start having some babies.All right, I want only the father in here please.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Bye Dan!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 Uh, bye Monica.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Bye, momi-moo.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 All right, I need a clamp, sterile towel, and channel 31.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 What is that?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Oh, no-no-no, it's a good one! Fonzie plays the bongos. All right,are you ready? It's time to start pushing.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 Are you ready? It's time to try peeing.  Wait-wait-wait-wait-wait! It's almost time to try peeing.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Okay, now push! That's it push! Just concentrate on pushing! Yeah,here we go!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 I see the head.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yes, it has a head! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 All right. Keep pushing! Come on!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 I can't believe there's somebody coming out of you right now. There'ssomebody coming out of you! Is it? Is it? It's my son.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 All right. Here's your first baby.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 YESSSSS!!!!! We got a baby boy!! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Yes!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Frank Jr. Jr.!!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Oh, how does he look? How does he look?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 So gross! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 Okay. You ready to push again?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I already had a baby. Leave me alone.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Okay, okay, come on, you can do it. You can do it!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yeah!! Little Leslie is here! We got another one! Oh my God, I can'tbelieve I have two-two children. How scary is that? 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Come on little Chandler, it's time to be born. Come on little Chandler!Come on!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dr. Harad	 All right, he's coming. He's coming!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Hey, where's his thing?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Chandler's a girl!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Oh God, kindergarten flashback.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 They musta read the sonogram wrong. 'Cause they, 'cause they thought itwas a boy, but Chandler's a girl! Chandler's a girl!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Okay, keep saying it!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Alice	  Am I too late?!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 No-no ah, everything's okay. Everybody's healthy there's 30 fingers and30 toes.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Alice	 We have our babies?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Frank	 Yeah.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Alice	  Oh, we have our babies.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 Oh my God.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Ross	 You did it, man.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey'S Doctor	 Would you like to see them? 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Joey	 They're so small! 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Dan	 So, I'll call you tomorrow.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Great!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not goofaround with him.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing aroundin the dictionary Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends whocare a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together.But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to,y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am so bad at this.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 I think you're better than you think you are.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Really? Okay, so
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	  Know when to stop.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Y'know, I sensed that I should stop. So we're okay?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Yeah. All right, I'm gonna go tell Dan that it's not gonna happen.  Don'tdo the dance.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 Right!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 I think you're my favorite.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Which one do you have?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 I don't care.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	  Hi.  Hey, hi! So uh, Frank and Alice wanted me totell you that they're still outside making phone calls.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 But umm, I mean, did you talk to them about, y'know
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 Yeah, umm, no honey.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Oh. It was a long shot. Hey, you guys can I just like have a secondalone with the babies.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	All	 Yeah, sure yeah. Yeah.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 So, here you are. It seems like yesterday I was talking to you in thatlittle petri dish. Everyone said labor was the hardest thing I'd ever have to do, but theywere wrong this is. Oh, I had the most fun with you guys! I wish I could take you home andsee you everyday. Okay, I'll settle for being your favorite Aunt. I know Alice's sisterhas a pool, but you lived in me. Okay, so we're cool. Yeah, we're gonna be great. Littlehigh fives!  Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! Well, if you're gonna cry. 
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Monica	 Phoebe, we are so proud of you! You're amazing!
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 I know.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Rachel	 So does it really hurt as bad as they say?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Yeah. You won't be able to take it.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 So uh, now that little Chandler turned out to be a girl, what are theygonna name her?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 They're gonna call her Chandler.
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Chandler	 That's kind of a masculine name, don't you think?
05	03	0503	The One Hundredth	Phoebe	 Works on you.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  Come in. I've been waiting for you. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Hi! I just wanna--Ahhh!!! Oh my God!  Oh my God!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  Okay, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I-I-I was um, I wastaking a nap.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Since when do take naps in that position. Oh God Monica, tell meyou were waiting for a guy! Please tell me you were waiting for a guy!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Yes. Yes, I was. A guy. From work.  I'm seeing a guy from work!Ha!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	  That cute waiter guy from your restaurant, the one that lookslike a non-threatening Ray Liotta?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Uh-huh, that one!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Y'know what, just give me a second and I'll be out of your hair. I'mjust gonna grab a jacket. When I get back, I want every little detail.  Maybe that's him. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  Okay, umm, okay, umm  It'sjust Joey and Ross.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Why aren't you guys at the movie?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Well, we were! But Ross was talking so loud on his phone they threw usout!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 I had to talk loud because the movie was loud!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  He's talking to London!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 But why?! Did he get in touch with Emily?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Well no, not yet. He's calling everyone on her side of the family hopingthat someone will help him get in touch with her.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  I-I-I don't care if I said some other girl's name you prissy,old twit!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Ross! Way to suck up to the family.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	  Ha-ha-ha--enh-enh. I'm so glad you guys are allhere! My office finally got wrinkle free fax paper!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  Hey!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no-no-no-no, vomit tux! No-no, vomit tux!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Don't worry, I had it dry-cleaned.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Vomit tux? Who vomited ony'know what, what you up to Joe?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Well, I'm doing this telethon thing on TV and my agent got me a job asco-host!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Oh that's great!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 A little uh, good deed for PBS and a little TV exposure, now that's thekind of math Joey likes to do!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Ugh, PBS!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 What's wrong with PBS?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Ugh, what's right with them?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Why dont you like PBS, Pheebs?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Okay, 'cause right after my mom killed herself, I was just in thisreally bad place, y'know personally. So, I just thought that it'd make me feel better if Iwrote to Sesame Street, 'cause they were so nice when I was a little kid! No oneever wrote back.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Well y'know a lot of those Muppets don't have thumbs.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 All I got was a lousy key chain! And by that time I was living in a box.I didn't have keys!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 I'm sorry Pheebs, I just, y'know, I just wanted to do a good deed.Like-like you did with the babies.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 This isn't a good deed, you just wanted to get on TV! This is totallyselfish.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What about you, having those babies for your brother?Talk about selfish!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 What-what are you talking about?!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Well, yeah, it was a really nice thing and all, but it made you feelreally good right?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yeah. So?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 It made you feel good, so that makes it selfish. Look, there's nounselfish good deeds, sorry.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yes there are! There are totally good deeds that are selfless.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Well, may I ask for one example?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's Y'know there'sno you may not!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 That's because all people are selfish.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Are you calling me selfish?!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Are you calling you people?  Yeah, well sorry toburst that bubble, Pheebs, but selfless good deeds don't exist. Okay? And you the deal onSanta Clause right?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 I'm gonna find a selfless good dead. I'm gonna beat you, you evilgenius.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  Hello.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	  Hello, Ross?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Emily? Emily! Oh my God! Oh my God, it's Emily!  It's Emily everyone! Shush-shush-shhst! Hi!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 Ross, I'm only ringing to say stop harassing my relatives. Good-bye!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 No wait! Look, wait! Okay, you can hang up, but I'm gonna keep calling!I'm gonna, I'm gonna call everyone in England if that's what it takes to get you to talkto me!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 Really? About what?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Look you're my wife. We're-we're married. Y'know? I-I love you. I-I reallymiss you.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 I miss you to. Well, at least I think I do.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  She's talking.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	All	  Yay! 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Hey, Joey, when you said the deal with Santa Clause, you meant?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 That he doesn't exist.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Right. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Uhh, yeah. She uh, she uh, she uh might've mentioned him.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 So Mon, when are we gonna meet this new secret waiter man?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Ohh, he's really shy. I-I dont think he's up to meeting everyoneyet.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Yeah, I don't think he's up to meeting everyone yet.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 I dont care! I wanna meet this guy who's the best sex she everhad!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Really?! That's what you heard?  You said that?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 I might've said that.  Why is that funny?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Because I'm very happy for him!  And you, you luckydog!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  Hi!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Hey!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Well, Emily's willing to work on the relationship.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Yes!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 That's great!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 In London!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 What?!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 She wants me to move to London.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 But you live here!  You know that.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 What-what-what are you gonna do?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 I bet if I talk to Carol and Susan I can convince them to move to Londonwith Ben.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Yeah, I'm sure your ex-wife will be more than happy to move to anothercountry so you can patch things up with your new wife.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 It could happen.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  How ya doin'? Welcome. Good to see ya!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 This will be your phone.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 That's great. But uh, I'm not really expecting a lot of calls.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 No you answer it and take pledges.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 But I'm the host!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 No, Gary Collins is the host. You'll be answering the phones.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 You don't seem to understand. See, I was Dr. Drake Remoray.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 Well, here's your phone doctor. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 I cannot believe I can't find a selfless good deed! Y'know that old guythat lives next to me? Well, I snuck over there and-and raked up all the leaves on hisfront stoop. But he caught me and force-fed me cider and cookies. Then I felt wonderful.That old jackass!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Maybe Joey's right. Maybe all good deeds are selfish.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 I will find a selfless good deed! 'Cause I just gave birth to threechildren and I will not let them be raised in a world where Joey is right!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	  Hey, Monica? Can I ask you a cooking question?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Sure!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 If you're cooking on the stove, does that mean that your new secretboyfriend is better in bed than Richard?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Chandler!  Is he?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Well, y'know I-I-I think I'm gonna respect the privacy of my new secretboyfriend.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Why?! I mean if this guy was me and it was me who hadlearned that it was me who was the best you'd ever had, I'd be going like this. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 All right Emily, as much as I love you, I'm sorry, I can't move to Londonwithout Ben.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 I understand that would be difficult.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Yeah, would you please consider moving here? I mean you were gonnamove here anyway, why can't you just do that?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 I don't know, it's just
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Oh-oh-okay, but-but I know, that even though I've been a-a completeidiot up 'til now, I mean, I mean you-you-you have to come here. You have to come here sowe can work this out.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 All right.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 All right, did you just say all right?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 I did. Now I'm the idiot.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Oh, Emily that is, that is so great. It's gonna be so great! We're gonnabe like-like-like two idiots in love!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 Ross, there's one thing that really scares me still.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Yes, tell me.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 Well, you have to understand how humiliating it was for me up on thataltar in front of my entire family, all my friends.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 I know. I am, I am so sorry.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 And then after decided to forgive you, seeing you at the airport catchingour plane with her.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Again, very sorry.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 I mean, I can't-I can't be in the same room as her! It drives me mad justthinking of you being in the same room as her!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Emily, there is nothing between Rachel and me. Okay? I love you.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	 All right. I'll come to New York and we'll try and make this work.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Oh that is so great! That's
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emily	  As long as you don't see Rachel anymore.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 So I asked Emily if she would come to New York, and she said yes.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Yes!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Ooh-ohh!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Great!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 No-no-no! Only if I promise never to see Rachel again.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Why?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 What?! You can'twhat did you tell her?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 I told her I'd have to think about it. I mean, how the hell am I supposedto make this kind of a decision?  I'm actually asking you!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Well, you can't just not see Rachel anymore, she's one of your bestfriends.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Yeah! But, he can't not exactly see Emily, I mean that's his wife.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yeah.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 That's true!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yeah, but you've known Rachel since High School and you cannot just cuther out of your life.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 That's true!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 No, you cannot.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Thanks for the help, problem solved. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  Hello.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  Hey Mon!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Oh hey Joey! We've been watching all day, when are you gonna be on TV?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 See, there was kind of a mix up in my agent's office, but I'm still on TVand that's good exposure. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  You're not on TV.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Oh, uh, okay, how, how about now? 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Hey, there he is! There he is!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Hello New York! 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Emeril	  Now maybe you just like wanna but the whole duck in there! Whocares, y'know? Now I got the legs
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 How many times have I told you guys, you never watch thecooking channel!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	  Hi Chandler.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Hey!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Uh, listen, I need that broiling pan that Joey borrowed the other day.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Oh that was yours? Uh, yeah, we used it when the duck was throwing upcaterpillars. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 William Sonoma, fall catalog, Page 27.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Expect it in 4-6 weeks.  Umm, hey, umm, Joey'sgonna be at the telethon for the rest of the day, we have the whole place to ourselves.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Yeah, so?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Well I just, thought maybe you'd wanna book some time with the bestyou'd ever had.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Y'know what, champ? I think I'll pass.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Why?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Why? 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 What's your point?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  PBS telethon.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	  Hey Joey, I just wanted to let you knowthat I found a selfless good deed. I just went down to the park and I let a bee sting me.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 What?! What good is that gonna do anybody?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Well, it helps the bee look tough in front of his bee friends. The beeis happy and I am definitely not.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Now, y'know the bee probably died after he stung ya.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	  Aw, dammit! 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 Back on in 30 seconds people!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Hey, excuse me, would you mind switching with me?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Pbs Volunteer	 Hey, no way, I'm in the shot man.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Come on man! You've been here all day!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Pbs Volunteer	 Yeah, I-I'm taking pledges here, eh?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Stage Director	 We're on in 3, 2, 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Gary Collins	 Welcome back to our fall telethon. Now if you've been enjoying theperformance of Cirque Du Soleil,  and you'd like to see more of the same kind of programming,it's very simple. All you have to do  is call in your pledge and atthat time tell the operator, one of our volunteers, what kind of programming you'd liketo 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  Okay, that's it. I cannot make this decision! It is toodifficult, so I'm just gonna leave it entirely to the gods of fate. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 A Magic Eight ball?! You can't be serious, you can't make this decisionwith a toy!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Ooh, it's not a toy.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Well, I don't know what else to do. I mean, I either keep my wife and loseone of my-my-my best friends or I keep my friend and get divorced the second time beforeI'm 30! So-so if anyone has-has a better suggestion, let's hear it! 'Cause I-I gotnothing! All right, don't be shy, any suggestion will do.  Okay then.Here we go. Magic 8 Ball, should I never see Rachel again?  Ask again later. Later is not good enough.  Ask again later. What the hell! This is broken! It-it is broken!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 All right, let me see.  Will Chandler have sextonight?  Don't count on it. Seems like it works to me.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	  PBS Telethon.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	  Hi Joey.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 Hey Pheebs!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 I would like to make a pledge. I would like to donate $200.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 $200? Are you sure Pheebs? I mean, after what Sesame Street did toya?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm still mad at them but I also now that they bring happiness tolots of kids who's moms didn't kill themselves, so by supporting them, I'm doing a goodthing, but I'm not happy about it. So there, a selfless good deed.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 And you don't a little good about donating the money?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 No, it sucks. I was saving up to buy a hamster.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Joey	 A hamster? What, those things are like 10 bucks.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Yeah, not the one I had my eye on.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Gary Collins	  It looks like we have surpassed last year's pledge total!Thank you viewers! The pledge that did it was taken by one of our volunteers Oh boy! And may I say one of our sharpest dressedvolunteers,  Mr. Joseph Tribbiani!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Phoebe	 Oh, look-look, Joey's on TV! Isn't that great? My pledge got Joey on TV!Oh that makes me feelOh no! 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	  Look, maybe I got carried away before. But there'ssomething you gotta know. If I'm the best, it's only because you've made me the best.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Keep talking.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 I mean I was nothing before you. Call the other girls and ask. Whichwouldn't take long. But when I'm with you, and we're together, OHMYGOD.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Really?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Oh-aw my God! Now, I understand if you never want to sleep with meagain, but that would be wrong. We're too good! We owe it, to sex!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Well, if we owe it?  Oh my When is Joey gonna be home?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Well, I was kinda hoping we could do this without him.  Oh no-no-no, leave the gloves on.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 But, I just cleaned the bathroom.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Yeah, why don't we lose the gloves.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Yeah. 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 All right, let's show them how it's done.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Okay.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Ow!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Y'know that wasn't part of it?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 I know!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	  Hi! Are you ready? We're gonna be late!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 For what?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 For Stella! Remember? She's gettin' her grove back in like 20 minutes.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Yeah, I uh, totally forgot about that. You mind if I take a rain check?I'm waiting for a call from Emily.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Sure. I guess. Hey, I hear you don't have to go to London. Yay!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 It's not that easy, there's still a lot of relationship stuff.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Like what?
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Just stuff. Y'know kinda what Emily wants.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Well, why don't you talk to me about it, maybe I can help.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 No. No. You-you can't help. I mean, I kinda have to do this without yourhelp.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Well, I-I know you can do that too. I'm just, I'm just saying if youneed somebody to talk to Hi!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	 Thanks.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Rachel	 Ross? Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just giveit to her. Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. So just fix whatever shewants fixed. Just do it.  I mean, you're gonna have totry. You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't.  Oh come onanswer it! It's driving me crazy!
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Ross	  Hello.  Hi sweetie.  Good. Lookumm, yes I've been thinking about that thing that you wanted me to do and, I can do it. So will you come to New York? 
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Monica	 Never done that before.
05	04	0504	The One Where Phoebe Hates PBS	Chandler	 Nope.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	  Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Hi! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Monica? What time is it?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Uhh, 9. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 But it's dark out.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Well that's because you always sleep to noon, silly! This is what 9looks like.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 I guess I'll get washed up then. Watch that sunrise. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 I'm really getting tired of sneaking around.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I know, me too. Hey! Y'know what if we went away for a whole weekend?Y'know we'd have no interruptions and we could be naked the entire time.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 All weekend? That's a whole lotta naked.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Yeah, I can say that I have a conference and you can say you have achef thing.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Ohh, I've always wanted to go to this culinary fair that they have inJersey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay, y'know your not though. Let's go. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Wait! What about Joey?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	  Hey, guess what I'm doing this weekend! I'mgoing to this culinary fair in New Jersey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Oh weird, Chandler just told us he's got a conference there!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Oh now that-that-that's funny, it seems like Chandler's conferencecould've been in Connecticut or Vermont.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I'm not in charge of where the conference is held. Do you want peopleto think it's a fake conference? It's a real conference.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	  Hey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Is Rachel here? I gotta talk to her.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 No, she's out shopping.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Damn!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 What's going on?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I told Emily to come. And I just need to y'know, talk to Rachel about it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Wait a minute! So when Emily comes you're just, you're not gonna seeRachel anymore?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Well look, I'm just trying to focus on the "I get to see mywife," part, all right? And not the part that makes me do this. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Wow, so you guys are, you're never gonna be in the same room together?How is that even gonna work?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I have no idea. I mean But-but I assure you I will figure it out.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Doesnt seem like it's going to work, I mean
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	  Hi, guys!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Uh, hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 What's going on?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 We're flipping Monica's mattress.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 So I'm thinking, basically we pick it up and then we flip it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Yeah that's better than my way.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Aww, man! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	  Oh look! A letter from my mom.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 So, Rach, y'know-y'know how Emily's coming right?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh yeah! I know.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	  Can you hear anything?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Oh yes, somebody just said, "Can you hear anything?"
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey, Joey's ass! What are you doing?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	  Well, remember when they got in that big fight and brokeup and we were all stuck in her with no food or anything? Well, when Ross said Rachel atthe wedding, I figured it was gonna happen again, so I hid this in here.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Ooh, candy bars, crossword puzzles
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Ooh, Madlibs, mine! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Condoms?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 You don't know how long we're gonna be in here! We may have torepopulate the Earth.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 And condoms are the way to do that?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Anyway it-it kinda-it all boils down to this, the last time I talked toEmily
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	  Oh my God! My dog died!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 What?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh my God, Le Poo, our dog!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Le Poo's still alive?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh God, it says he was hit by an ice cream truck and dragged fornine--teen blocks. Oh.  Ohmy God.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Sweetie, we heard you crying. Please don't cry.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 It's Le Poo.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 I know it's le poo right now, but it'll get better.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  I can't believe it! We're here!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Ooh, chocolates on the pillows! I love that!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Oh, you should live with Joey, Roll-os everywhere.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Come here.  Okay, be right back. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Oh yes! Monica, get in here! There's a high-speed car chase on!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 We're switching rooms.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Oh dear God, they gave usglasses!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 No, they gave us glasses with lipstick on them! I mean, if they didn'tchange the glasses, who knows what else they didn't change.  Come onsweetie, I just want this weekend to be perfect, I mean we can change rooms, can't we?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay, but let's do it now though, because Chopper 5 just lost it'sfeed! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Hey, so uh, y'know how there's something I wanted to talk to you about?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh yeah! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Well, y'know how I'm trying to work things out with Emily. Well, there'sthis one thing Okay,  here goes. I made a promise that--Oh hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 What?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 You're nose is bleeding!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh God.  No! Oh not again!  This-this happened when my grandfather died. It's ugh! Sorry.  Oh, okay, so I'm sorry, what-what were you-what did you want to tell me?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Umm 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Sorry. Sorry.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Okay, I uh, I can't see you anymore.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Yeah, I know. It's ridiculous! I can't see you either.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Hotel Clerk	 I think you'll find this room more to your liking.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay, great. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Hotel Clerk	  They say he's only got half a tank left.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Half a tank? We still got a lot of high-speed chasing to do!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 We're switching rooms again.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 What? Why?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 This is a garden view room, and we paid for an ocean view room.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Hotel Clerk	 Our last ocean view room was unacceptable to you.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	  Excuse me, umm, can I talk to you over here for just asecond?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Uh-huh. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Chandler!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Yeah.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Look, these clowns are trying to take us for a ride and I'm not gonnalet 'em! And we're not a couple of suckers!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I hear ya, Mugsy! But look, all these rooms are fine okay? Can youjust pick one so I can watch--have a perfect, magical weekend together with you.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Okay, this one I like!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Nothing! It's over! Dammit! This isregularly scheduled programming!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Can we turn the TV off? Okay? Do we really want to spend the entireweekend like this?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Oh, I'm sorry, am I getting in the way of all the room switching fun?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey, don't blame me for wigging tonight!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Oh, who should I blame? The nice bell man who had to drag out luggageto 10 different rooms?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 I don't know, how about the idiot who thought he could drive from Albanyto Canada on a half a tank of gas!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Do not speak ill of the dead.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 We're supposed to uh, be spending a romantic weekend together, it-it,what is the matter with you?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I just want to watch a little television. What is the big deal? Geez,relax mom.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 What did you say?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I said, "Geez, relax Monnnnn."
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Hey. Rachel, I-I-I've been wanting to tell you something for a while nowand I really, I just have to get it out.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Okay, what's up?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Okay, y'know how you told me I should do whatever it takes to fix mymarriage?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Yeah, I told you to give Emily whatever she wants.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 And while that was good advice, you should know that what-what shewants 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Yeah?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 is for me not to see you anymore.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 That's crazy! You can't do that! What are you going to tell her?  Oh God. Ohh, you already agreed to this, haven't you?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 It's awful I know, I mean, I feel terrible but I have to do this if I wantmy marriage to work. And I do, I have to make this marriage work. I have too. Butthe good thing is we can still see each other until she gets here.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Ohh! Lucky me! Oh my God! That is good news, Ross! I think that'sthe best news I've heard since Le Poo died!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 You have no idea what a nightmare this has been. This is so hard.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh yeah, really? Is it Ross? Yeah? Okay, well let me make this a just alittle bit easier for you.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 What are you doing?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Storming out!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Rachel, this is your apartment.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Yeah, well that's how mad I am!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Damn Rollos!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey, you're back!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Hey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 How was your conference?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 It was terrible. I fought with  my colleagues y'know, theentire time. Are you kidding with this? 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Oh, so your weekend was a total bust?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Uh, no, I got to see Donald Trump waiting for an elevator.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	  Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey, you're back too!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Yeah. Umm, Chandler can I talk to you outside for a second?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey, how was your chef thing?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Oh, it was awful.  I guess some people just don'tappreciate really good food.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Well, maybe it was the kind of food that tasted good at first but thenmade everybody vomit and have diarrhea.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Chandler! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Monica. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Okay, I'd like to know how much the room was because I'd like to pay myhalf.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay, fine, $300.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 300 dollars?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Yeah, just think of it as $25 per room!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Urghh!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	  What are you guys woofing about?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Chandler stole a twenty from my purse!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Nooooo!!! Y'know what? Now that I think about it, I constantly find myselfwithout twenties and you always have lots!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 You should've seen the look on her face. I don't want Rachel to hate me! Idon't know what to do.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 You want my advice?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Yes! Please!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 You're not gonna like it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 That's okay.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 You got married to fast.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 That's not advice!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 I told ya.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I'm going to the bathroom. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Man, if anyone asked me to give up any of you, I couldn't do it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler, Phoebe	 Yeah, me either.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Maybe I could do it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	  Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hi, Rach.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Hi!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Hey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Look, I know you guys heard about the whole thing with me and Ross buty'know, I've been obsessing about it all day and I'd just love not to talk aboutit. All right?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 I-I-I don't know if this falls under this category, but uh, Ross is rightback there. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 That's not Ross!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Oh no! Not that guy! He does look like him though.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay, Ross is in the bathroom.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh my God, its happening. It's already started. I'm Kip.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey, you're not Kip!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	  Do you even know who Kip is?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Who cares? You're Rachel!  Who's Kip?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Kip, my old roommate, y'know we all used to hang out together.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Oh, that poor bastard.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 See? Yeah, you told me the story. He and Monica dated when they broke upthey couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stayhis friend and what happened? He got phased out!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 You're not gonna be phased out!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Well, of course I am! It's not gonna happen to Ross! He's your brother. He's your old college roommate. Ugh, it was just a matter of time beforesomeone had to leave the group. I just always assumed Phoebe would be the one to go.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Ehh!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Honey, come on! You live far away! You're not related. You lift rightout.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Hey, Mr. Bing. That uh, hotel you stayed at called. Said someone left aneyelash curler in your room.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Yes that was mine.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 'Cause I figured you'd hooked up with some girl and she'd left it there.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Yes that would have made more sense.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Y'know, I-I don't even feel like I know you anymore man! All right, look,I'm just gonna ask you this one time. And whatever you say, I'll believe ya.  Wereyou, or were you not on a gay cruise?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Phoebe?  I'm sorry about the wholelifting out thing.  You gotta come with me!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Come where?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Wherever I go. Come on you and me, we'll-we'll start a new group, we'rethe best ones.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Okay, but try and get Joey too.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	  Pheebs, you mind if I speak to Rachel alone for a sec?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Oh, sure!  Bye Ross!  Forever.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Hi.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Hi. What are you doing here? Isn't this against the rules?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I talked to Monica, look, I'm the one who made the choice. I'm theone who's making things change, so I should be the one to y'know, step back.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Oh, Ross
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 No, no, it's okay. Really. They're plenty of people who just see theirsisters at Thanksgiving and just see their college roommates at reunions and just see Joeyat Burger King. So is, is that better?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 No, it's not better. I still don't get to see you.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 Well, what-what would you do? Rach, if you were me, what-what would youdo?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I can't believe this is happening.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 I know.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Ross	 I am so sorry.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 I know that too.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	   Hey, Rach? Sorryto interrupt but umm, Phoebe wanted me to talk to you about a trip or something.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  Hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hi.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 I just came over to drop offnothing. So that weekend kindasucked, huh?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Yeah, it did.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 So, I guess this is over.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 What?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Well, y'know, you and me, it had to end sometime.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Why, exactly?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Because of the weekend, we had a fight.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Chandler that's crazy! If you give up every time you'd have a fight withsomeone you'd never be with anyone longer thanOhhh! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 So, this isn't over?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	  You are so cute! No. No, it was a fight. You deal with it andmove on! It's nothing to freak out about.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Really? Okay. Great!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Ohh, welcome to an adult relationship! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	  We're in a relationship?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 I'm afraid so.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Okay.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Oh hey, Monica, I heard you saw Donald Trump at your convention.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Yeah, I saw him waiting for an elevator.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Hey, Rach, can I borrow your eyelash curler, I think I lost mine.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Yeah, it's in there. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	  Oh! Ohh! Oh!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Joey, can I talk to you for a second? 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Oohh!! Ohh! Oh-oh-oh! Oh-oh!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Ohhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Yes. Yes. 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	  You?!  And-and you?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 How?! When?!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 It happened in London.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 IN LONDON!!!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 The reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't want to make abig deal out of it.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone! 
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 No-no-no-no-no! You can't!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay?Just promise you won't tell.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 All right! Man, this is unbelievable! I mean, it's great, but
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 I know, it's great!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 Aww, I don't want to see that!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 We're so stupid! Do you know what's going on in there? They're trying totake Joey!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 The most popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe. And ifyou win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say, "Hi, Phoebe!"
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Oh that's cute! We really all enjoyed it. But y'know, it doesn't count.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Phoebe	 Count for what?
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Count in our heads as-as good Madlibs.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 I guess I'm done.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Chandler	 Fun's over!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Wait-wait, guys! If-if we follow the rules, it's still fun and it meanssomething!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Rachel	 Uh-huh!
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Joey	 I think I'm gonna take-off.
05	05	0505	The One With The Kips	Monica	 Guys, rules are good! Rules help control the fun!  Ohhh! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	  Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!! None of that, not while you're livingunder my roof!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 What?!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Look, just because I know about you two, doesn't mean I likelooking at it.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Aren't you supposed to be at an audition for another hour?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman!  And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition! Okay, look, if Ihave to pretend I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretend there'snothing to know about.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler, Monica	 Okay.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Sorry.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Sorry.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	  I can hear that!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	  Rachel's at work.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 I can still hear you!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Hey!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Hello!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Hey, what's that?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Yeah, my mom sent me a family heirloom that once belonged to mygrandmother. Can you believe it?! A year ago I didn't even have a family, and now I haveheirlooms for crying out loud.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Eeeee--ohh!! God! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Argh-argh!!  Ooh, soft. Is this mink?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Yeah! Why would my mother send me a fur? Doesn't she know me butat all! Plus, I have a perfectly fine coat that no innocent animal suffered to make!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Yeah, just some 9-year-old Filipino kids who worked their fingersbloody for 12 cents an hour. That didn't happen, I made that up!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	  Hey!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Gunther	 Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 How come? Everybody else does.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Gunther	 You can't.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 What is that?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Oh, umm, I'm just getting rid of a couple of things.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	  This is all of your things.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Yes, yes it is! No, but it's good it'sEmily thinks we should get allnew stuff. Stuff that's just ours, together. Y'know brand new.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 So basically, this is a getting-rid-of-everything-Rachel-ever-used sale.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Touched. Used. Sat on. Sleep on.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Gunther	 I'll take it all.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Hey, Ross, you're okay with that?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Look, if I can just do what Emily wants and get her to New York,I'm sure everything will be fine.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Okay, but don't you think this is a little extreme?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 After what I did? Can you blame her?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Oh my God! You got off easy! When my friend Silvie's husband saidsomeone else's name in bed, she cursed him and turned his thingy green.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	  What is he doing? What, Emily, thinks Ross'sfurniture has got Rachel coodies?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Now calm down Joey.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 No! Everything's gettin' all messed up, y'know? Emily won't let Ross seeRachel, we're not gonna stop seeing Rachel, hence Ross stops seeing us!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Oh, I hate this. Everything's changing.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Yeah I know, we're losing Ross, Joey said hence
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Look, I'm not happy about this either, but y'know if-if Ross says he'shappy then we're just gonna have to keep our feelings about Emily to ourselves. Are youcool with that?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 No! But y'know, I'm an actor, I'll act cool.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Ohh, whoa God! Storage rooms give me the creeps! Monica, come on pleasehurry up honey! Please? 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to waituntil I find the little waffle iron.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 I want the little round waffles.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 All right.  Op, here it is! Right underneath thecan of-of bug bomb. I wonder if the best place to put something that cooks food isunderneath the can of poison?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what? I'll-I'll have toast!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Arghhhh!!!!!!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Oh my God! Fog him! Fog him!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 I don't know what I'm gonna do about this coat.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 I'll take it!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 That might work! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Ooh-ooh-ooh, yeah!  Enh? All right,what do you think?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 You're on in 5 Ms. Minnelli. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	  No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden.  No, it's great.Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all righty. Bye. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 What's the matter Ross?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Nothing. Oh, actually, great news! I just got off the phone with Emily andit looks like I'm moving to a new apartment. Woo-hoo!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Why?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Well, her thought is, and I agree, fresh new furniture, why not a freshnew apartment? Her cousin has this great place to sublet, it's got a view of the river onone side and Columbia on the other.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 That's way uptown! That's like three trains away! Which is great! I love to ride that rail!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 So you're really okay with this?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Yes! Yes! I mean it's-it's kinda far from work, but uh, y'know, I'll getso much done on the commute. I-I've been given the gift of time!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Now that's so funny, because last Christmas I got the gift of space.We should get them together and make a continuum.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Now he's movin'? Man, what is Emily doing to him?  Ow!! He's not even here!!!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 You guys! You guys!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 We were, we were just in the storage area and we saw this really creepyman!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 It was like this crazy-eyed, hairy beast man! He was like a, like abigfoot or a yeti or something!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 And he came at us with an axe, so Rachel had to use a bug bomb on him!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	  Yeah, I-I-I just pulled the tab and I just fogged hisyeti ass!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Uhh, like dark hair, bushy beard?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Yeah, you fogged Danny.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Please! We did not fog Danny! Who's Danny?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Dan just moved in downstairs. Yeah, he just got back from like thisfour-month trek in the Andes. Nice fella. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Oh he's nice. He's nice! Y'know, you always stick up for the people wefog!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Yeah?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Hi! You might not remember us, but we are the girls that foggedyou.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 We're-we're really sorry we fogged you.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Okay. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Hi! Just so you know, we-we didn't mean to fog you, we thoughtyou were like a yeti or something.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Okay.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Yesss?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Hi! Sorry to bother you, but I don't think we can accept youracceptance of our apology, it just doesn't really seem like you mean it.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Yeah.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 O-kay!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Wow! That guy is so rude!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Really! What is with that guy? I mean you'd forgive me if I fogged you.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Well you did a little bit.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Oh my God, honey, I'm so sorry!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 I totally forgive you!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Really?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Yes!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Hey!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 So listen, you know my friend Chris who owns the crematorium? 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Crematorium Chris? Sure!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 He says, that he would cremate my fur coat for free if I umm, y'know,bring in the next person I know who dies.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh my God, look at these pelts!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Don't get too attached, she's having it cremated.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 What? Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a bigkick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like acrime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 This is fashion?!  Okay, so to you, deathis fashion?! That's really funny.  Here'sPhoebe umm, sporting uh, y'know, cutting edge hairy carcass from y'know, the steal trapsof wintry Russia. I mean, you really thing this looks good?  'Cause I do.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	  I know I miss you too. I can't wait to see you. I love you.Bye. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Okay, what is in here? Rocks?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 No-no, this is my collection of fossil samples.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 So, rocks. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 I'm really gonna miss this apartment. Y'know, Ben-Ben took his first stepsright over there. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Ohh. Hey, remember when I ran into this thing  and it kinda knocked me out a little?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 I loved this place! To tell you the truth, I wish I didn't have to move.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Uhh, are you saying that you're not entirely happy about this?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Well, I mean if uh, if Emily gave me a choice
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 You do have a choice!! Ross, why are you listening to her?! Areyou, are you crazy?!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Why?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 It's not right what Emily wants you to do! She is totally--Owww!! Stop pinching me! Look, now you guyssaid I only had to keep my mouth shut as long as Ross was happy, right? Well he just toldme that he's not entirely happy.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 What's going on?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 We all hate Emily!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Nooo!!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 No, Ross, we do not hate Emily. We-we just, we just think that you'rehaving to sacrifice a whole lot to make her happy.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Yeah!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Look, we just think that maybe she's being a little unreasonable.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Yes! Yes! Unreasonable!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Unreasonable? How about we have this conversation when one of you guysgets married! You have no idea what it takes to make a marriage work! All right,it's about compromise! Do you always like it? No! Do you do it? Yes! Because it's not alllaughing, happy, candy in the sky, drinking coffee at Central Perk all the time! It's reallife, okay? It's what grown-ups do! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 I think he's right. You guys hang out at the coffeehouse way too much.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 God, I feel so guilty about Ross.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Oh, I know.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 I kinda feel like it's my fault.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Kind of? If you just kept this to yourself none of this would'vehappened.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Well, I'm keeping so many things to myself these days, something was boundto slip out! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Well, I think it's very brave what you said.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 All right, I can't sit here anymore. I have to walk places. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Pheebs, what are you doing with the coat? How about the whole animalrights thing?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Well, I've been reading up and for your information, minks are not verynice. Okay, I admit it! I love this coat! Okay, Iit's the best thing I've ever hadwrapped around me, including Phil Huntley!  Remember Phil Huntley? He was fine!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Hi!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 So you like the short hair better.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 What? YetiI mean Danny?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 I had to cut my hair to get rid of the uh, fogger smell.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Oh. Listen, I'm so sorry. I would, I would've never fogged you if y'knowif you hadn't looked so. Y'know.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Absolutely. Some people are just into appearances.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	  What?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 That's cool. Cool. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 What? Hey! No-no-no! This not cool! You don't even know me!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Come on, you got the shopping bags and the Sack's catalog. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 So from that you think you've got me all figured out? Well, you don't!Y'know I-I could have toys for underprivileged kids in here!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Do you?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Well, y'know, if-if kids like to play with Capri pants.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Okay. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 And stop saying that! I hate that!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Okay!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Fine! I judged you. I made a snap judgement. But you did it too! And youare worse because you are sticking to your stupid snap judgement! You can't even open upyour mind for a second to see if you're wrong! What does that say about you?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 The pizza-place across the street any good?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 What?!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 I'm hungry. Wanna get some pizza? You can keep yelling if there's more.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Okay. Okay.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Danny	 Stop saying that. I hate that.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Uh, Ross?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Are you still mad at us?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Yep.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Oh good! Because we have an "I'm sorry" song.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Y'know what? I'm really not in the mood.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Look, Ross, I feel really bad. I mean, you're going through all this stuffand I just acted like a jerk.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Yeah, we are so sorry.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	  You're kinda stepping on the song. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Look, we were way out of line, we totally support you.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Whatever you decide, whatever you do.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Okay, now you're just taking lines right out of the song!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Look, this is hard enough! I really need you guys right now.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Yes! Exactly! And that's why
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Why don't you come over tonight? And I'll make you favorite dinner.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Okay. Thanks you guys. Pheebs are you wearing fur?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Okay, let's get some perspective people; it's not like I'm wearing aseeing-eye dog coat!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Hey, y'know Ross, I think I kinda understand why I kinda lost it today.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 You do, huh?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Yeah you see umm, well, I'm an actor. Right? So I gotta keep my emotionsright at the surface y'know? See what I'm saying? I gotta lot of balls in the air.  Y'know what I mean? It's tough! Guys like me, y'know, you wanderaround, you're alone
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 What are you talking about?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	  I'm not sure.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	  Hi!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Hey, look at you! Where have you been?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Oh, I went to have pizza. With Danny.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 How did that happen?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 That yeti is one smooth talker.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 I hope you're not full, 'cause dinner's almost ready.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Yeah, y'know I-I think I'm just gonna hang out in my room.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	All	 No! Why?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Come on you guys! Listen, if Emily knew I was here having dinner youwith you she would flip out and you know it. It's okay, I really I don't mind.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Wait! Wait! Wait! Y'know what? Just stay. Please? It uh It wouldreally mean a lot to me if you stayed.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Ross, I
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 RACHEL PLEASE!!! JUST HAVE DINNER WITH US!!!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. Joey, it's okay. Settle down.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 All right, I-I'm sorry. I'm sorry. You see Rach I'm an actor
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Hey! Hey, look! Ugly Naked Guy's back!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 I haven't seen him in so long!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Oh God, I really missed that fat bastard!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Wow, this is so weird. I just realized this might be the last time we'llall be hanging out together.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 It's almost as if he knew.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 I'll get it.  Hello.  Hi Emily!  Yeah, uhyou-you tracked him down. Hold on one second. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Hey!  Yeah-yeah, we're just having dinner.  Uh, yeah,sure uh hold on.  She wants to say hi.  Hold on.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Hi Emily!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Hi!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 Hello everyone. So who am I saying hello too?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 Well uh, I don't know about who's here, but I can tell you for damn surewho's not here and that's Rachel!!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	  Well, I should hope not. Ross knows better than that by now.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Y'know what? Uh, Rachel is here! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 She's there?!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Chandler	 Oh yeah, there-there she is!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, she's here.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 Ross, take me off speakerphone.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	  Hi.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 How can you do this too me?! I thought I'd made my feelings about Rachelperfectly clear!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	  Look Emily, I'm just having dinner with my friends,okay?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 You obviously can't keep away from her.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Emily that's ridiculous. Look, I'm-I'm moving for you, I'm cutting friendsout of my life for you. Please, just get on the plane and come to New York. Okay, you'llsee you're the only person I want to be with.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 I'll feel better when I'm there, and I can know where you are all thetime.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Well, you can't know where I am all the time. Look, this marriage is nevergonna work if you don't trust me.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 You're right.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 So, can you trust me?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Emily	 No.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 I think it's going okay. Looks like he's smiling.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 How can you tell? You can only see the back of his head!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 You can totally tell! Here look, watch me.  Smile! Frown. Smile! Frown.  Smile! 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Well, I guess that's it.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	All	 Why, what happened?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Joey	 What happened? What happened?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 My marriage is over.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	All	 What?!
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Monica	 Oh, sweetie. Oh, look at you. You're shivering.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	 Here. 
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Rachel	 Ross, honey, is there anything we can do?
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Ross	 Yeah. You can help me get my furniture back from Gunther.
05	06	0506	The One With The Yeti	Phoebe	  Okay, stop tormenting me! This mink! Okay, they'remean! And they hate squirrels! And y'know, okay, most of these probably wanted to becoats!  All right, fine, now I get it.  Here. You take it.  Are you happy now? I'm cold!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Are you looking at naked tribe's women?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 No, look. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 That's a pig.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 I know, I know, but look at the knobs on her.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Hey! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Emily's cousin kicked me out!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 What?! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Why?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Well, when you're subletting an apartment from your wife's cousin and thenyou get a divorce, sometimes the cousin suddenly wants his apartment back.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 How can he do that? Didn't you sign a lease?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Who needs a lease when it's family!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey, you can stay with us! We'll take care of ya!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Oh, yeah! Absolutely! Anything you need man! But you have to promiseme the second you are feeling better so that we can make fun of your hair!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Yeah.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 You got it.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Okay.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Thanks you guys, I really appreciate this. All right, I'm gonna getpacking again. Man, I've been moving around so much I'm beginning to feel like a nomad.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 What?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 He thought you said gonad.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Health Inspector	 Wow, Monica, if every restaurant is as clean as yours, I'd have atough time making a living.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Oh, Larry.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Umm, do health inspectors work on commission? 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 No, bribes.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 It's okay to laugh right?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Yeah, I was just kidding.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Okay. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 I'll check the kitchen floors.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Okay, knock yourself out, Larry.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Yum-my!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Larry?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh yeah! I'd let him check out my kitchen floors.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	  A 98. I deducted 2 points because you are not wearing yourchef's hat, and that is a Section 5 violation.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Uh, look, Larry honey, umm, I wrote the book on Section 5 and I knowthat you don't have to wear your hat unless you're in the kitchen.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 And where is your hat?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 It's in the kitchen, I'll go get it. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Ahh that's the 2 points.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Hey, you should really read that book you wrote.  Wow! You sawthe hat in the kitchen and knew that she'd have to go in there hatless to get it.You can have your own health inspector detective show!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Oh, I don't know about that.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Yeah, but then I can be you sidekick Vunda.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Maybe uh, Vunda could give me her number and I can ask her to dinnersometime.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Okay, she would love that! Y'know, 'cause you know all the clean placesto eat.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 I-I'll call ya.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Okay.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 He's so funny! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Thanks.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Thank you.  Mon?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Hmm?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 How's Ross doing? Y'know since all the Emily stuff.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 He's not great umm, but he's dealing with it. Oh wait a minute, you'renot gonna try
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Oh, honey, please, no, I can't get started with all that Ross stuffagain. I mean, he's gonna screwed up for a looong time. And besides y'know, I don't, Idon't go for guys right after they get divorced.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Right, you only go for them 5 minutes before they get married.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	  Two pounds of Moca Java please.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	  Danny. Are you guys ever gonna go out again?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 I don't know! He hasn't called me since that one time when we went out.I see him in the hallway, we flirt, I'm all ha-ha-ha-ha, and nothing.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	  Hey!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Hi Danny!  Wow! Thirsty huh?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Uh, actually, actually, I'm having a party at my place on Saturday, it'ssort of a house warming kind of thing.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Ohh, fun!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Ohh, great!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Yeah, I'm really looking forward to it.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Okay, see ya. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Well, I guess we won't be warming his house.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	  Okay. All right, I see what he's doing! He's not asking me out,because he wants me to ask him out.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 And you're not gonna do that.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 That's right! 'Cause that would give him the control! So now he'sall ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hintaround for an invitation. Blew up in his face, didn't it?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 So-so there is no party.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 No, there's a party. There's a party. But the power, that is still upfor grabs. You follow me?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 I think so. Se, he-he's not inviting you to his party because he likesyou.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Exactly.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Ross?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  Hey roomies!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Love what you've done with the place.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Oh, yeah I know, I know, it's a lot of boxes, but again I reallyappreciate you guys letting me stay here.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Not a problem. And listen, hey! Since you're gonna be here for a while,why don'tI was thinking we uh, put your name on the answering machine.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Oh yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Oh, I uh, hope you don't mind, I kinda uh, jazzed it up a little. Checkthis out.  We will, we will, call you back!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey, all right!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Pretty cool, huh?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	  You're fake laughing too, right?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Oh, the tears are real.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 You look beautiful this evening.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	  Show me the badge again.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Shiny. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Oh, will you mind if I wash up? Because I came straight from work and whoknows where these babies  have been.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	  You are just nonstop!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	  We're outta here!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Why?!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Just walking past the kitchen I saw 10 violations! I'm shutting thisplace down!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	  You have the power to do that?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 This does. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	  Shut it down.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 What are you doing?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Nothing.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 You built a fort didn't ya?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	  Kinda.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	  Oh my God, the air purifier! Ross's air purifier!All I heard through 4 years of college was 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Dude, you should've gone out once and a while.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 I hate this thing!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Come on, Chandler, Ross is our friend. He needs us right now, so why don'tyou be a grown up and come and watch some TV in the fort!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Oh, hi Danny.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Hey guys, I just uh, wanted to invite you to the party tomorrow night.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Oh, thanks! We'll try to stop by.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Uh, actually, I think I'm gonna be busy.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 You are?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah! Remember I got that uh, gala.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Yeah, what's the gala for?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 It's a uh, regatta gala.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Really! You-you sail?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 No-no, but I support it.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Okay,  hope I see you tomorrow night.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Okay.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Take care. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Okay.  Walked right into that one didn't he?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 What one? You wanted him to invite you to the party and he did it!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah, but he waited until the last minute! So if I said yes, he wouldknow I had nothing better to do than wait around for an invitation to his stupid party. Isaid, "No!" Which puts me right back in the driver seat.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Great. So the ball is in his court?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Ball? There is no ball.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  Joey, please! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Sorry.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Ahhhhhhhhhh 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	  Hello children!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey! Wanna play some foosball? Please?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Okay. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 No-no, no! We have to move the table into my room, yeah! 'Cause of all theboxes. Come on!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 All right, I have one question. What is the deal with this?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Bye-bye little puppet Joey hand?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 No, the quiet down thing!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 You mean this. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Um-hmm! Look, I-I-I don't know how much more of this I can take! Did youknow he taped over my Baywatch tape with some show about bugs! My God! What if thathad been porn?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	  All right look, y'know, this maybe tough but come on, this isRoss! I survived college with him!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 All right, I guess I can hold out a little longer. Let's have a game.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Okay.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 No-no-no-no!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 YES!!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  Uh fellas, 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Okay, so he's out of here.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Um-hmm.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	  Hey!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Hey!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 You guys got anything to eat? I just went down to Johnos for some chickenand it was closed!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh, I took Larry there to eat but it was all violated. So we shut itdown!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Pheebs, if this guy keeps closing down all of our favorite places, whereare we gonna eat?!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 I don't know, clean places?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Umm, yum!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	  It's Danny.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Don't let him in! I'm supposed to be at a regatta gala.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	  We'll be right there!  Can't you just say itstarts later?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 What? What kind of a regatta gala starts at night?!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 The fake kind! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Hey, hi, I need a ladle. You got a ladle?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 We have a ladle. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Thanks, see you at the party.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Okay, great! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Hey, guys, you know what Larry would say? He would say, "See youladle." 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Well, I-I-I'm done with this. You want anything Ross? Sports?International? Apartment listings?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 I'll take sports.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Mine! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 All right. Uhh, international.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Oh that's mine too!  I'm Italian!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Well, I guess I can check out those apartment listings, even thoughthere's never anything in here.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Not even on page 7?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  Oh yeah! You'rehey, you're right! Here's an affordableplace,  two bedroom, close to work, ooh, it's available in five weeks!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 What about that circled one?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Oh, I-I don't know, it's kind of expensive for a studio.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 But it's available now! Isn't it?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yes, it is.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey, let's go look at it! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Okay, let's go.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Okay!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 There we go!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Oh-oh-ooh, hey guys, I was wondering if you guys would uh, maybe chip inon some new air filters for the air purifier? I mean after all, we all are using it.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Let's go quicker.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Oh my God! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yeah, well look at this kitchen, slash bathroom. Well that's great!Y'know so you can cook while in the tub.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Somebody was using his head. Hey, let's check out the rest of the place.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 I think this is it. I don't know, maybe we should keep looking.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 But hey, Ross, this place is available now!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yeah, you don't want to be stuck with us for the next five weeks.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Yeah.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  So, you-you think I should go ahead and take this place?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Oh, it's perfect!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  How about you?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 It's a kitchen slash bathroom.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 All right, I see what you guys are saying. I'll uh, I'll go downstairs andfill out an application.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 We are bad people.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 He knew we were trying to get rid of him. He knew!  You think wecould get a bathtub in our kitchen?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	  Hey, ready for dinner?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Ooh, absolutely!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Great! How about you wanted to go the Italian place down on BleakerStreet right?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Ooh, I love that place!  So, no.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 How about Mama Lisettie's?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Enh. Sure!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	  I wonder how long that milk  has beensetting out.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Oh, no-no, this place is totally healthy! Thatthis milk is mine. Ibought this today, 'cause I was thirsty for milk, y'know.  Okay, let's go!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Hey, buddy!  Are you familiar with Section 11-B ofthe Health Code that requires all refuse material out the back exit?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Gunther	 But then I'd have to go all the way around the dry cleaner place.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Oh, so you're saying you'd choose convenience over health?!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Okay, stop! Larry, okay, can't you just be Larry and not Larry thehealth inspector guy? Y'know I mean it was really exciting at first but now it's like,okay, so where are we gonna eat ever?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Larry	 Well, I suppose I could give him a warning.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Phoebe	 Thank you.  Okay, go! Go! Go!  Now, if after dinner you still really need to bust someone, Iknow a hot dog vendor who picks his nose.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Maybe, maybe we did a good thing, helping Ross get back on his feet!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yes that was a nice place!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Not a lot of closet space, but he can just hang his stuff out thewindow in a bag!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 What are we gonna do?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 I don't know. Maybe pizza?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 About Ross!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Oh! Oh!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hello!  Oh yeah!  It's the apartment manager; Rossput us down as references.  Ross is the greatest guy you'llever meet! Yeah, he's very reliable.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	  Of course he has this big huge dog! That uh,barks into the night.  Well, who doesn't love dogs?  Ah, he's a tapdancer!  Yes, some would say that is a lost art.  He's a pimp! There you go! Yes, he's a pimp. He's a big, tap dancing pimp!  Hello? 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Ohhhhh!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Shoot, shoot, this is never gonna work! He's right there!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Just go over and say hi.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 No, I have to go downstairs and come back up as if I'm coming home fromthe regatta gala. Okay? So just go distract him. But don't be sexy.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Hey, Danny!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Hey! What's going on?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	  Oh, it's a great party! Great food.Y'know, most parties it's all chips and salsa, chips and salsa.   So umm,what's this? 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Salad.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 Ooooh!  And-and-andwhat-what's this? 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Bread. Aren't you a chef?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	  Oh.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Hey! Rachel!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Hey! Oh right, tonight was your party.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Oh wow, you look great! Glad you could make it.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Oh well, y'know, the gala had to end sometime.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 Don't go anywhere, I'll be right back. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah, sure.  All right, whose court is the ball in now?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 I thought there wasn't a ball?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Oh, come on! He's glad that I came, he doesn't want me to go anywhere,balls flying all over the place!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	  Rachel, this is my friend Tom.  Thisis the girl I told you about.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Oh, go on! You telling people about me?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Danny	 You two could really hit it off! I'm gonna go mingle. 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Tom	 So you work at Bloomingdale's, huh? My mom calls it Bloomies.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	  Yeah, okay, at ease solider!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Tom	 I'm sorry?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 No, it's all right, you can just drop the act Tommy. I know what's goingon here. Your Danny's wingman right? You guys are best buds. Frat bros!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Tom	 I'm gonna go talk to uh, a friend.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah, you go talk to your friend. You tell him, "Nicetry."
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Man! He just keeps lobbing them up and I just keep knocking them rightout of the park!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Monica	 I think I need a drink.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 98. 99. 100. Okay, go!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	  Dude, I'm telling ya! I'm fine! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Here we go! Here we go!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Hey!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Hey!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Hey. So I uh, I didn't get that apartment. Some problem with myapplication.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 You're kidding!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 You're kidding, no!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Yeah. But, the good news is that Phoebe said that I could stay at herplace for a while. So
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 But you can't stay with Phoebe, Ross! We're-we're roomies! 
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Look, you guys don't need me here taking up your space.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Well, we got plenty of space! There-there's still some over there  by-by that speaker. Please, just stay!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yeah!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 Are you guys sure about this?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Definitely!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Yes! Ross, you have to stay!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 All right.
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 All right!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 All right, buddy!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	 So I'm a pimp huh? It's okay! Look, I know that sometimes I can be a painin the ass, but you just have to talk to me. Tell me if something is bothering you. Okay?And for my part I will do everything I can to keep my annoying habits just .
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 Well, I see you've had a very productive day. Don't you think thecowboy hat is a little much?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Ross	  Come on, it's fun!
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Chandler	 All right!  Isn't this a woman's hat?
05	07	0507	The One Where Ross Moves In	Joey	 Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Oh Monica that was the best Thanksgiving dinner ever! I think youkilled us.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 I couldn't possibly eat another bite. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 I need something sweet.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Does anyone wanna watch TV?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	All	 Yeah, sure.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Monica your remote doesn't work.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Phoebe, you have to lift it and point.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh. Aw, forget it.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Yeah, you know what we should all do? We should play that game whereeveryone says one thing that they're thankful for.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Ooh-ooh, I! I am thankful for this beautiful fall we've been having.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 That's very nice.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 That's sweet, Joey.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Yeah, the other day I was at the bus-stop and this lovely fall breeze camein out of nowhere and blew this chick's skirt right up. Oh! Which reminds me, I'm alsothankful for thongs. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 I mean, it's not so much an underpant as it is a feat of engineering. Imean, it's amazing how much they can do with so little material! And the way they playwith your mind! Is it there? Is it not there?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Are you aware that you're still talking?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Is anyone thankful for anything else besides a thong?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Huh, I don't know what to pick. Am I more thankful for my divorce or myeviction? Hmm.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Wow! See, and I didn't think you'd be able to come up with anything.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 I'm sorry. It's just that this is the worse Thanksgiving ever.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 No-no-no! I am the king of bad Thanksgivings. You can't justswoop in here with your bad marriage and take that away from me.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents gotdivorced again are you?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Oh God, no.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Oh, come on! I wanna hear it! It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without Chandlerbumming us out!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 It's a tradition, like the parade. If the parade decided it was gay,moved out, and abandoned its entire family.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Bing	 Now Chandler dear, just because your father and I are getting adivorce it doesn't mean we don't love you. It just means he would rather sleep with thehouse-boy than me.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Housekeeper	 More turkey Mr. Chandler? 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 You're right. Yours is worse. You are the king of bad Thanksgivings.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 I don't know about that. I've got one that's worse.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Really? Worse than, "More turkey Mr. Chandler?"
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh, did the little rich boy have a problem with the butler? Yes, mine'sworse!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Past Life Phoebe	 More bandages! More bandages! Please, can I get some morebandages in here! This man is dying Oh no.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 In this life, Phoebe.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh, this life! Oh okay no, Chandler's is worse.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Man, it must be so cool remembering stuff like that! I don't have any pastlife memories.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Of course you don't sweetie. You're brand new.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 I know Monica's worst Thanksgiving.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Oh, let's not tell this story.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	All	 Oh, come on!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh no, I know! I know! It's the one where Joey got Monica's turkey stuckon his head!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 What?! Joey got a turkey stuck on his head?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Hey, it's not like it sounds.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 It's exactly like it sounds.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	  Hello?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	  Hello?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Phoebe?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Joey? What's going on?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Look. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 I know! It's stuck!!!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	  Easy. Step. How did it get on?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 I put it on to scare Chandler!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Monica's gonna totally freak out!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Well then help me get it off! Plus, it smells really bad in here.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head up a deadanimal.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	  Hey!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Hey, did you get the turkey bastedOh my God! Oh my God!  Who is that?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 It's Joey.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What-what are you doing? Is this supposed to be funny?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 No, it's not supposed to be funny, it's supposed to be scary.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Well, get it off now!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 I can't! It-it's stuck!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Well, I don't care! That-that turkey has to feed 20 people at myparent's house and they're not gonna eat it off your head!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 All right, hold on! Okay, let's just all think.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Okay, I got it. Phoebe? All right, you pull. I'm gonna spread the legsas wide as I can.  Joey? Now is not the time!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Sorry! Sorry.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Okay, count to three. 1. 2. 3!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Arghhhhhh!! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	  It worked! I scared ya, I knew it! Ha-ha!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 I'm over here big guy.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	  Yeah, you are! I scared you!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	  You did look like an idiot.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 Hey, I wasn't the only one who looked like an idiot. All right? Rememberwhen Ross tried to say, "Butternut squash?" And it came out, "Squatternutbuash?"
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Yeah that's the same.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 That's it. That's my worse Thanksgiving.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh wait! That can't be the one Rachel's talking about. She didn't evenknow that happened. So which one was it?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	All	 Which one?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Umm, I-I really don't want to tell this story.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Oh, come on Monica, reliving past pain and getting depressed is whatThanksgiving is all about. Y'know, for me anyway. And of course, the Indians.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Look umm, of all people, you do not want me to tell this story!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 Monica! I think Rachel's here!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 I'll get it!  Happy Thanksgiving!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Not for me. Chip and I broke up!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Oh, why? Why? What happened?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Well, you know that my parents are out of town and Chip wasgoing to come over
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Yeah, yeah, and you were going him y'know, your flower.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Okay, Monica, can you just call it sex?! It reallycreeps me out when you call it that! Okay, and by the way, while we're at it, a guy'sthing is not called his tenderness. Believe me!  Hi!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Hi Rachel!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Happy Thanksgiving!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 You too sweethart!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	  Hey! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Oh my!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Uh, everyone, this is Chandler! My roommate and lead singer of our band!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Ross! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Oh, this is Monica.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Hi, I'm Ross's little sister.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	  Okay.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 I'm so glad you could come Chandler, we've got plenty of food so Ihope you're hungry.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Oh, mom. Mom. Chandler hates Thanksgiving and doesn't eat any Thanksgivingfood.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, well, I'm so glad you brought him here then.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Umm, Chandler, if you want I can make you some macaroni and cheesefor dinner.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Well, as long as the pilgrims didn't eat it, I'm in.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 dammit! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 So uh, Rach? Does it, does it feel weird around here now? Y'know sinceI've been away at college.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Oh! No, not really.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Well, that's cool. So did 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Ugh! I cannot believe Chip dumped me for that slutNancy Branson. I am never going out with him again. I don't care how much he begs!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 I think his begging days are over now that he's going out with NancyBranson.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Y'know what? I've just had it with high school boys! They arejust silly.  Silly, stupid boys! I'm going to start dating men!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Umm, I'm sorry Judy, I couldn't find that bowl that you and Jack werelooking for.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Call them mom and dad you loser!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	  Monica!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Hey Chandler! Did you like the macaroni and cheese?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Oh yeah, it was great. You should be a chef.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Okay!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Guess what?! All that stuff about Nancy Branson being a slutwas all a rumor so Chip dumped her and he wants to come over to my house tonight!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Oh that's so great!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 I know!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 Oh gosh, listen if you and Chip do it tonight, promise me you'lltell me everything.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 Oh totally, totally. Y'know it's not that big of deal, wealready kinda did it once y'know.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 I know, but y'know, this time you're gonna definitely knowwhether or not you did it!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Big Nosed Rachel	 I know, I know. And oh, and this time Chip promisedthat-that this time it will last at least for an entire song!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 So Im thinking about asking Rachel out tonight. Y'know maybe playher that song we wrote last week.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Emotional Knapsack?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Yeah.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Right on! Oh! Uh, but, dont take to long okay? 'Cause uh, we'regonna test out our fake ID's tonight, right Clifford Alverez.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Listen, Roland Chang, if things go well, Im gonna be out with herall night.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Dude, don't do that too me!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 All right, it's cool you can stay here. My parents won't mind.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 No, it's not that, I just don't want to be stuck here all night withyour fat sister.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Hey!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	  Monica, why don't you finish off these pies? Idon't have any more room left in the fridge.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Fat Monica	 No. No, thank you!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Well Judy, you did it! She's finally full!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 I called you fat?! I don't even remember that!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Well, I do.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 I am so sorry. I really am. I was an idiot back then. I rushed thestage at a Wham concert for crying out loud!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh, I can't believe you called her fat.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 I can't believe you let George Michael slap you.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 I am really sorry. That is so terrible. I am so, so sorry.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Actually, y'know that's not the Thanksgiving I was talking about.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Yes, it was!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 No, it wasn't. It was actually the
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	  Okay, now Thanksgiving's over, let's get ready forChristmas. Who wants to go get a Christmas tree?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Oh, no, I have the cutest Christmas story!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 We wanna hear Monica's Thanksgiving story!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Phoebe	 Fine, all right, mine had a dwarf that got broke in half, but y'knowwhatever.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 So Rachel, your mom tells me you changed your major again.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, I had too. There was never any parking by the Psychologybuilding.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	  Hi Rachel.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Oh hi!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Wow, love your new nose!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 Jack.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 What? Dr. Wilson's an artist! He removed my mole cluster. Wanna see?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 I'll get it.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 No, God! Please, let me! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Hey!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Hey.  Happy Thanksgiving! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	  God, your hair sure is different!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Yeah, we were just talking about that. I can't believe how stupid weused to look. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 So uh, where's Monica?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 She's upstairs. Monica! Come down! Everyone's here! Ross, Rachel,and the boy who hates Thanksgiving.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Hi, Chandler.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Oh my God!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What-what's the matter? Is there, is there something on my dress? 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 You just, you look so different! Terrific! That dress! That body!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Dude!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Sorry!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 Yes, yes Monica is thin. It's wonderful. But what we really want tohear about is Ross's new girlfriend.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Oh mom! Okay, umm, her name is Carol. And she's really pretty. And smart.And uh, she's-she's on the lacrosse team and the golf team. Can you believe it? She playsfor both teams!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 So Chandler, I guess I'll see you at dinner.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Dude!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Sorry.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	  Oh-ho, my God! That was so awesome! You totally got him backfor calling you fat! He was just drooling all over you. That must've felt so great!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Well it didn't!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 What?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Yeah, I mean yeah, I look great. Yeah, I feel great and yeah, my heartis not in trouble anymore! Blah, blah, blah! Y'know I still don't feel like I got himback, y'know? I just want to humiliate him. I wanna, I want him to be like naked and thenI'm going to point at him and laugh!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Okay, that we may be able to do.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 How?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Well guys tend to get naked before they're gonna have sex.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What?! I mean, I didn't work this hard and-and-and lose all this weightso that I can give my flower to someone like him!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Okay, first of all, if you keep calling it that, no one's gonna evertake it. Then, second of all you're not actually gonna have sex with him! You're justgonna make him think that you are.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Yeah.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 And when he's naked I can throw him out in the front yard and lock thedoor and all the neighbors will just humiliate him!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Then, you will definitely get him back!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Okay, so how do I make him think I wanna have sex with him?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Okay, oh, here's what you do. Just act like everything around you turnsyou on.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What do you mean?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Well, like anything can be sexy. Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good againstmy cheek! And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. Or I can bring itdown to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	  I can do that!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 Yeah? Okay! Good, good, because he's coming. He's coming. Hey, what's up? 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Monica, I was wondering if you can make me some of that righteous macand cheese like last year.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Umm, I'd love too!  Ooh, I love macaroni andcheese. I love-I love the way this box feels against my cheek.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Okay.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Boy, I love carrots! Oh!  Sometimes I like to put them between my fingers like this and-andhold them down here while I talk to you.  Umm,and-and-and y'know if I get really hot umm, I-I like to pick up this knife and-and umm, I-I put the cold steal against umm,  my body. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Are you all right?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Oh yeah, of course. I'm fine it's just that
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 What do we got here?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Paramedic	 Twenty year old has got a severed toe on his right foot.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	 Can you please not do that feet first? You know where his injury is!Severed toe, you just said it!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 It says here that the knife went right through your shoe.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Of course it did. They're made of wicker.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 Did you bring the toe?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Oh yes! I have it right here, on ice! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	  Don't worry son, we'll just attach it and
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What?! What is it?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 You brought a carrot.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 What?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 This isn't your toe, this is a small, very cold piece of carrot.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Rachel	 You brought a carrot?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mrs. Geller	 Oh my God! There's a toe in my kitchen.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 God, I'm sorry! I'll go back and get it!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	The Doctor	 It's too late, all we can do now is sow up the wound.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Without my toe?! I need my toe!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Wait, no-no-no, I can go really fast! Dad, give me the keys to your Porsche!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Mr. Geller	 Oh, I'm not falling for that one!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 That's why I lost my toe?! Because I called you fat?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 I didn't mean to cut it off. It was an accident.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 That's why for an entire year people called me Sir Limps-A-Lot?!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 I'm sorry! It wasn't your whole toe!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I miss the tip! It's the best part. It has the nail. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Chandler! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Ross	  Sir Limps-A-Lot, I came up with that.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Joey	 You're a dork.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 I can't believe this.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Chandler, I said I was sorry.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Yeah, well, sorry doesnt bring back the little piggy that criedall the way home! I hate this stupid day! And everything about it! I'll see youlater.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Oh wait, Chandler, come here is there anything I can do? Anything?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Yeah, just leave me alone for a while. 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Oh-oh, I'm a duck! I go, "Quack, quack!" Im happy allthe time!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Nice try.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Wait, wait, wait! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Look, Monica
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Look! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 This is not going to work.
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 I bet this will work! 
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 You are so great! I love you!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 What?
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 Nothing! I said, I said "You're so great" and then I just, Ijust stopped talking!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 You said you loved me! I can't believe this!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 No I didn't!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 Yes, you did!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 No I didn't!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Monica	 You love me!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	Chandler	 No I don't! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
05	08	0508	The One With The Thanksgiving Flashbacks	French Phoebe	  Gauze! Gauze! I need to get some gauze in here! Can I pleaseget some gauze in here!  Whew! This is getting ridiculous uh! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 What am I sitting on?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Top of the world? Dock of the bay?  I'm out.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	  Ew-eww!! Undies! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 All right! Who's are they? Who's are they?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Well, they're not mine!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Well, they're Joey's! They gotta be Joey's!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Yeah, they're mine.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 See? They're Joey's! J-J-J-J-J-Joey's!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Why are they here?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 I don't know uhh  Well, I'm Joey.Yeah, I'm disgusting, I take my underwear off in other people's homes.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Well, get 'em out of here! What's wrong with you?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Yeah!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Yeah!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	  Take 'em!  Joey, you can touch them! They're your underwear.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	  Chandler? A word.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 That's it! I'm tired of covering for you two! This has got to stop! Ahh!  And tighty-whiteys! What are you, 8?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	  Thank you Joey, thank you so much!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Oh hey, no, you're not welcome. Okay, look, I hate this! You guys keepembarrassing me!  Yesterday, Rachel found your razor in our bathroom and Ididn't know what to say, so I said it was mine and-and that I was playing a woman in aplay. And one thing led to another and 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	  Wow! And around the ankles, y'know that is a toughspot.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Yeah, it was! All right, listen, I can't
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	  All this lying has been hard on us too.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Oh-oh, yeah-yeah, I bet all the sex makes it easier!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Well, yeah actually.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 We'll try to be more careful okay? It's just that, we don't wanteveryone to know because this is going really well, and maybe the reason it's going reallywell is because it's a secret.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 I know it sounds really weird, but we're just so bad at relationships.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 We are! Help us!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Help!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 All right! But,  you do it with me once.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Joey!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Didn't think so.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Hey, Phoebe!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Hi, Pheebs!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Hey, Pheebs!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Hey, Pheebs!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 What are you reading?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Umm, Wethering Heights. I'm taking a literature class at the NewSchool and I have to finish it for the first session tomorrow.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 I didn't know you were taking a class. That is so cool.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah! Well, I really liked that Lamaze class I took! Y'know and thistime I thought I'd go for something, y'know a little more intellectual, with a lesspainful final exam.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Honey that sounds like fun.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah! Ooh, you should come with me! Oh yeah, then I'd have someone tosit with!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Okay.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah! Okayooh, but are you going to have time to read it?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Oh, I read that in high school.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 This is going to be so much fun! Okay-shhh, I have to finish.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Hi.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 What's wrong buddy?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Someone at work ate my sandwich!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Well, what did the police say?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 My Thanksgiving leftover sandwich. I can't believe someone ate it!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Ross, it's just a sandwich!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Just a sandwich? Look, I am 30 years old, I'm about to be divorced twiceand I just got evicted! That sandwich was the only good thing going on in my life! Someoneate the only good thing going on in my life!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Okay, look, I-I have enough stuff for one more sandwich, I mean I wasgoing to eat it myself, but 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  That-that would be incredible. Thank you so much. I-I stillcan't believe someone ate it!! I mean, look, I left a note and everything. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	  Knock-knock. Who's there? Ross Geller's lunch. Ross Geller'slunch, who? Ross Geller's lunch, please don't take me. Okay?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 I'm surprised you didn't go home wearing your lunch.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Okay, look you wanna hold onto your food? You gotta scare people off. Ilearned that living on the street.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Really?! So what would you say Pheebs? Stuff like uh, "Keep yourmitts off my grub?"
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Say Ross, when you picture Phoebe living on the street, is shesurrounded by the entire cast of Annie?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Okay, this will keep them away from your stuff. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	All	 Whoa! Ohh!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Phoebe, you are a bad ass!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Someday I'll, tell you about the time I stabbed the cop.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Phoebe?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Well, he stabbed me first!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	  Sorry I'm late, but I left late.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Okay.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 So Pheebs, what is the book about?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 I thought you said you read it in high school.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this peprally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anywayumm, what is this book about?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Okay, umm, it's this tragic love story between Cathy and Heathcliff andumm, it takes place on like these really creepy mores in England. Which I thinkrepresents the wildness of Heathcliff's character. I totally get symbolism.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 How would you characterize the theme of this book, uh let's seehere , Rachel Green?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Well, that's sort of a given, but yes. Anyone else?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Oh-oh-oh, symbolism! And uh, the-the uh, wildness of the mores, which Ithink is-is mirrored in the wildness of Heathcliff's character.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Excellent! What Rachel has shrewdly observed here
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	  You completely stole my answer!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Well, honey that was pretty obvious.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Well how would you know?! You didn't even read it!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 What do you think? You in the blue shirt.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 I think that uh, yours is a question with many answers.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Would ya care to venture one?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Would you care to venture one?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Are you just repeating what I'm saying?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 All right, let's move on.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Okay then.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah but why didn't you just say that you didn't read the book?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Be-because I didn't want him to think I was stupid! I mean, that wasreally embarrassing what happened to you!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Phoebe! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Phoebe! You're note, amazing! Not only did no one touch my sandwich, butpeople at work are actually afraid of me. Yeah, a guy called me mental! Mental Geller,yeah, I always wanted a cool nickname like that.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Yeah, the best you got in high school was Wet Pants Geller.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 That was the water fountain! Okay?! Anyway, people are writing reports forme, uh pushing back deadlines to meet my schedule, I'm telling you, you get tough withpeople you can get anything you want.  Hey Tribbiani,give me that coffee! Now!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Cynthia	 God, this was really fun! I've been wondering if you were going to askme out.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 So you uh, still wondering?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Cynthia	 No, we just went out.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 You're smart. I like that.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Cynthia	 Oh, candles!  What is that? A blanket? A videocamera? Oh my God! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Oh no-no-no-no, wait-wait-wait!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Cynthia	 I can't believe you thought that you were going to video tape us havingsex on the first date! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Hiya.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Joey, is what she just said ummOh my God. You were actually gonna 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 What is going on here?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 And with Chandler in the next room. What are you, what are you sick?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 I'm Joey. I mean, I'm disgusting. I make low-budget adult films. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 You guys promised you'd be more careful! I mean, come on! The goodJoey name is being dragged through the mud here!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 We're so sorry.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Yeah.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Well, I'm telling everyone about you! That's the only way to explain theunderwear and the video camera that doesn't make me look like a pig!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 No-no, wait! There's got to be a better explanation. You can tell themyou had to make an adult film for your  adult film class.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Yeah, I like that. But no-no, how does that explain why Rachel found myunderwear at your place?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 OhI don't know.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Well, get ready to come out of the non-gay closet!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Okay, just wait, please. I promise we'll come up with something. Justgive us a little more time.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 All right. Hey, but it better make me look really, really good.  Oh, and another thing, the video camera? Nice!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 Umm, Ross. May I have a word with you?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Yeah, of course, Donald.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 We've been getting reports of some very angry behavior on yourpart.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 What?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 Threatening letters, refusal to meet deadlines, apparentlypeople now call you mental.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Yeah.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 We want you to speak to a psychiatrist. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Oh no, you-you don't understand. Ugh, this is so silly. Umm, this is allbecause of a sandwich.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	  A sandwich?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Yeah. You see my-my sister makes these amazing turkey sandwiches. Hersecret is, she puts a, an extra slice of gravy soaked bread in the middle; I call it theMoist Maker. Anyway, I-I put my sandwich in the fridge over here 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	  Oh, you know what?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 What?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 I-I'm sorry. I, I-I-I believe I ate that.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 You ate my sandwich?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 It was a simple mistake. It could happen to anyone.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Oh-oh really? Did you confuse it with your own turkeysandwich with a Moist Maker?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 No.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Do you perhaps seeing a note on top of it?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 There may have been a-a joke or a limerick of some kind.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  That said it was my sandwich?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my stillbe in the trash.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  What?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Dr. Leedbetter	 Well, it was quite large. I-I-I-I-I had to throw most of itaway.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 You-you-you-you  threw my sandwich away!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  MY SANDWICH?!!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 MY SANDWICH!!!!!! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Hi!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Hi!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	  So umm, what's this book about?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 You didn't read this one either?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Well, I was gonna, but I accidentally read something else.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 What?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Vogue! Hey, so tell me about this Jane Eyre woman.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 No! You should've read it yourself!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Come on Phoebe! Dont be such a goodie-goodie!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Fine! Okay, all right, so Jane Eyre, first of all, you'd think she's awoman, but she's not. She's a cyborg. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 A cyborg?! Isn't that like a robot?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Yeah, this book was light years ahead of its time.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	  Sorry I'm late. Let's get started. So, what dideverybody think about Jane Eyre?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Umm, Rachel and I were just discussing it and she had some veryinteresting insights.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Well, go ahead Rachel.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Uh, thank you Phoebe. Umm, well, what struck me most when reading JaneEyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 If you're talking about feminism, I think you're right.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Yeah, well, feminism yes, but also the robots.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Hey.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Hey. Okay, so umm, since that video camera thing didn't work out uh, Ithought that I would give you just a little preview. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	  You're naked in this picture!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 I know.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Ross?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Hey Chandler.  Monica!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Ross, are you okay?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 I'm fine! I saw a psychiatrist at work today.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Why?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 On account of my rage.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Which I may say, right now, is out of control.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 He gave me a pill for it.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 A pill?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Uh-huh. Well, when the psychiatrist told me I had to take a leave ofabsence because I yelled at my boss I started to get worked up again, so he offered me atranquilizer. And I thought was a good idea so, I took it.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Wait a minute, they're making you take time off work?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 And you're okay with that?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 I don't know. It's going to be weird not having a job for a while, but I,I definitely don't care about my sandwich.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	  Ugh, that was so embarrassing! I can't believe youlet me go on and on like that!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	  I'm sorry. It was just so funny when you started comparing JaneEyre to Robocop. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 That was not funny!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Well, I snapped! Okay? You weren't taking the class seriously.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Phoebe, come on! What is the big deal? I thought this was going to besomething we could do together! Y'know, I thought it would be fun!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 Well, yeah! Fun is good, but y'know I also wanted to learn. Y'know,people are always talking about what they learned in high school and I never went to highschool.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Ohh. Oh, so you really wanted to learn. Yeah, y'know, Pheebs I justwanted to have fun. Ohh, you know who you should go with?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	  I know! I know! I know!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	The Teacher	 Monica, you asked the question.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	  Oh my God! That's Monica!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Oh no-no-no! No-no-no-no-no-no-no!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 You get away from me!! You sick, sick, sick, sick-o!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  What's going on?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Joey has got a secret peephole!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	  Oh no! No! No! No! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Yes! He has a naked picture of Monica! He takes naked pictures of us!And then he eats chicken and looks at them!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Look! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	  Dude! That's my sister! 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	  Give me that!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 All right, wait! Just wait. Everybody just calm down. Okay? Let's giveour friend Joey a chance to explain why he's such a big pervert!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 No! I am not a pervert! Okay? It's just I justKinda
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 All right, look! Look. I think I can explain this.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Thank you!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Joey's a sex addict. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 What?!!  No I'm not!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 It's okay! It's good! It's good. It's a disease!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 No! No! I am not a sex addict!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Yes you are! That's the only way to explain all this stuff!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 No it isn't! No, it's not. Because you can also explain it with the truth!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Well, what is the truth?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Yeah, what's going on?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 What's going on?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	  I slept with Monica.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Well let's.let's see what everybody thinks of that?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Oh no!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 You slept with my sister?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Uh yes, but it was, we just did it once uh, in London.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 This is not good for my rage. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Monica, is this true?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Of course it's true! How else would you explain all the weird stuff that'sbeen going on?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Yes it's true.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found yourunderwear in our apartment the other day?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Ahhoy! That was the underwear I was wearing that night in London.Right Monica?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 I guess I wanted to keep it  as a souvenir. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 My God Monica!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Chandler	 Are you sure Joe? Are you sure you're not just a sex addict?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 No! If anyone's a sex addict here, it's Monica! Yeah. Yeah. She has beentrying to get me back in the sack ever since London!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 So that's why she gave you a naked picture of herself.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 That makes sense!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Rachel	 And the video camera?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Uhh, Monica?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 I guess I set up the video camera to try and entice Joey.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 But sadly I could not be enticed.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Ross	 Unbelievable! I mean you really kept Joey's underwear?! Why? Why would youdo that?!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 I'm Monica. I'm disgusting. I stalk guys and keep their underpants.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Joey	 Well, I think we've all learned something about who's disgusting and who'snot. Eh? All right, now, I'm going to get back to my bucket. I'm only eating the skin, sothe chicken's up for grabs. 
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 I really thought you making a good point. I mean y'know, until you gotcut off.
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	A Female Student	 Yeah, what's up with that girl Monica?
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Phoebe	 I don't know! I didn't come with her!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	  All right everybody! Everybody guess what? I justconvinced Paul to give us a test next week!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	All	 A test?!!
05	09	0509	The One With Ross's Sandwich	Monica	 Come on! Tests make us all better learners! Oh yeah!  Weshould have essay questions!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 What are you doing?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I...reorganized the fridge. See, bottom shelf: meats and dairy. Middle shelf: fruits and vegetables.  And top shelf: expired products. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Why are you doing this?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Because I am bored...Out of my mind. Ive already been to thebank, post office, and the dry cleaners.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Dude, you just described seven days worth of stuff. Youve got tospread it out a little, you know. Havent you ever been unemployed?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Hey, I am not unemployed. Im on sabbatical!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Hey, dont get religious on me, ok.  A guy in your position needs to be a little better at relaxing. You know. Whydo you think we have the comfortable chairs? Huh...come heresit down.  Ready?  Ahh!!  Ohh,yeah!! Huh?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 So what, we just sit?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Ohh, no, no. Were not going to just sit.  Shhh. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  Hello, Chandler Bing.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  Hello Mr. Bing...I love you.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  Alright, whoever this is, stop calling me!  Its been six months! Its not funny!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 But, I love you.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Leave me alone! For the love of God, leave me alone!!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 And thats Wednesday.  Ohh.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Hey you guys, guess what?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 The British are coming?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Ohh, you and your ways. Since its Christmastime. Im going to be one of those people collectiondonations.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	All	 Ohh.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	  Yeah, I already have my bell and later on...I get mybucket.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Ohh.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah, Im going to be out there spreading joy to thepeople. I mean, last year, I spread a little joy but not really enough. So this year,Im going to do the whole city.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 You know, I knew a girl in high school who did that. She was verypopular. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 So Pheebs, where are you doing all, your bell ringing?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Ohh, they gave me a great spot. Right by Macys. Yeah, theyhardly ever give such a good spot to a rookie, but Im the only one who can sing"Merry Christmas" in 25 languages.  I lied.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Oh my god. Ok you guys, theres Danny. Watch. Just watch this. See?! Still pretending hes not interested.Ohh, hes coming over. Just pretend like we dont know him. Weve forgottenwho he is.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Hey guys.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	All	 Hey Danny.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Danny? You know Rachel? Shes nice. Shes not bad to lookat, right?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Thanks, Mon.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Well, of course.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Do you want to go out on a date with her?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Monica!!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	  Absolutely! Is Friday okay?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Fridays perfect...She cant wait.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	  On the date, I will be able to talk to her directly?  See ya Friday. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	  Okay. What the hell was that? You know what?Dont answer me.  I have a date with Danny.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 How could I not get the part? The play was about a 29-year-old Italianactor from Queens.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Estelle	 Well, Telia Shire suddenly became available.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Shes a woman!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Estelle	 What can I say? She nailed it.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  Okay, is there anything else?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Estelle	 Well, youre just going to say no again but...gay porn.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Happy Holidays. Feliz Navidad. Allo, and Merry Christmas.  Ohh thank you sir. Here's some joy. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	  Phoebe!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 I just wanted to see how it's going.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Well, it's going okay.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	  Well good, here let me help you out. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Oh, thanks!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Yeah!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Wow!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Is that a new Swede jacket? It looks really expensive.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Yeah. I guess. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Just get your nails done?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Yes Phoebe, but this is all I have. Okay? 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Okay! Thanks! Happy Holidays, here's your joy. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Thank you! And Happy Holidays.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Wait, you can't take the money out.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	The Man	 I'm making change. I need change for the bus.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 But, can't you leave the dollar? This money is for the poor.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	The Man	 I'm poor! I gotta take the bus!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Okay, Seasons Greetings and everything, but still
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	The Man	 Bite me, blondie! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm going to give him something else besides joy, just 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 That part was perfect for me! I can't believe I didn't get it!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I'm sorry, man. Hey, y'know what you should do? You should make somethinghappen for yourself. Y'know, like-like write a play. Write a movie! Huh? I mean, whatabout those Good Will Hunting guys?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Come on Ross be realistic, y'know? If I did write something, what are thechances I could get those guys to star in it?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Wait a second, I could star in it!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Or that.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 I can't write! Y'know I mean I-I-I'm an actor, I don't have the disciplinethat takes, y'know? I can't do it.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I'll help you. Yeah, I'll make up a schedule and make sure you stick toit. And plus, it'll give me something to do.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Really? You'd-you'd do that for me?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Yeah!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Thanks!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	  All right, we'll start off slow. Theonly thing you have to do tonight is come up with the name of your main character.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Done!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 And it can't be Joey.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 It's not.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Or Joseph.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  Oh.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Hey, what's up?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 I just saw Danny getting on the subway with a girl and he had his armaround her.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Oh, honey, I'm sorry.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Well, you should be, this is all your fault! You meddled in ourrelationship!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 You had no relationship!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 No, but I was doing my thing and everything was going according to theplan!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Oh God, stop with the plan! So what, so what you saw him with a girl?Who cares?! That doesn't mean anything! Now look, you're going to go out on a date withDanny and you're going to be so charming he's gonna forget all about that stupid subwaygirl.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 She was kinda stupid. You're right. All right, I'm just gonna go on thedate. I'm gonna go on the date. That is the new plan.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Come on, hurry!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Hey, how do you spell suspicious? 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Why?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Because I think this character is going to be suspicious about stuff.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Yes! Chandler Bing, 7! Chandler Bing, 0.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 You're driving me crazy with that!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Okay, I'll stop.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Dont stop! Move the bowl further away! Ross could make that shot!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Well, you suck! But at least you suck at a man's game now.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 You wanna play?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Chandler, I can't be playing games, Ross is gonna be home soon. And I haveto write five whole pages if I'm gonna stick to his schedule.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Well, so, play for the next 30 minutes and then write until he getshome.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  All right! But uh, listen, what do you say we crank it up anotch?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 I'm intrigued. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 All right, all we need is a little lighter fluid. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Okay, but be careful okay, because I wanna get our security depositback.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Yeah, I think we said good-bye to that when we invented hammer darts.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Do you even remember which part of the wall is not spackle?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Uh yeah, right here. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Thank you, Happy Holidays.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Now, that's trash. Young lady, you can't  Hey! Stop that young lady, she donated trash!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Hey!!  The charity's on fire! Help!  Oh good! Thank you, I need that. Whoa! What isthat?!   It's nine o'clock in the morning!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 All right.  A room. A man enters, he looks suspicious.  That's it?  Joey,you're supposed to have five pages done by now! Including an exciting incident! And what is, and what is all this?!  Theofficial rulebook of Fireball.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Yeah, that's the uh, game we were playing.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  Oh yeah, it's great! See you take a tennis ball, a bowl, and some lighterfluidOp! Op! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 This is helping your career?! Huh? I thought you wanted to be an actor notthe creator of crazy lawsuit game!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 You're right, you're right, I'll get back to work.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	  And shame on you! You should know better, Joey needs towork.  Now come on! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Hey!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 No! Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah! You can have this back when the five pages are done! Ahh! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 I had a really nice time tonight.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 So did I. I'm really glad Monica asked us out.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 I'd love to ask you in, but uh, my sister's visiting and I think she'sasleep on the couch.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 You're sister? You're sister's asleep on the couch?  Ohhh! I saw her with you on the subway and now she's asleep onthe couch!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny'S Sister	  Oh, I thought I heard you.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Oh hey, great, you're up. Rachel, this is my sister Krista. Krista, thisis Rachel.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Hi!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 Nice to meet you. I wish you'd told me we were having company, I'd fixmyself up!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Like it would help.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 You are so bad! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 You are! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 You are so dead! I'm gonna get you. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	  Uh, it was very nice meeting you. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Nobody! Nobody respects the bucket! You wouldn't believe what people putin here! Look!  Okay, does this look like a garbage can to you?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 No.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Does it look like an ashtray?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 No.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Does it look like a urinal?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Eww!! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 So Pheebs, are you gonna go back out there or what?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Well, yeah! But I'm not gonna take anymore crap. Okay? No more Mrs. NiceBucket!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Yeah, good for you. Y'know you're tough, you lived on the streets.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah, I'm gonna go back to being Street Phoebe. Yeah! Oh but, y'knowwhat? I can't go totally back because Street Phoebe really wouldn't be friends with youguys. Sorry. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	  Hey!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Hey!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Hey, umm, can I ask you guys something?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica, Ross	 Sure.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Uh, I don't have any brothers so I don't know, but uh, did you guyswrestle?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Oh-oh, yeah.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 All the time. In fact, I was undefeated.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Uh, you weighted 200 pounds.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Still, I was quick as a cat.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Well, I met Danny's sister yesterday, and uh that was actually the girlon the subway.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Oh, you're kidding.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Yeah, they were very y'knowwrestley. But, I guess that's normal?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	  We don't, we don't wrestle now.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Yeah, not since I got too strong for you.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Too strong for me?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Yeah.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 You wanna go right now? 'Cause I'll take you right now, buddy! You wannago?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Oh fine.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Ready?  Wrestle! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. That helps a lot. Thanks.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  Guys, come on! Let's go! The puck drops in20 minutes! Come on, Joe!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Joey's not going.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  I didn't finish my five pages.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Well, why can't you do them tomorrow?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Because tomorrow he's redoing yesterday's pages.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Yesterday's pages did not reflect my best work.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  Why don't you cut him a little slack? Okay? Maybe if herelaxes a little bit, he'll get some work done.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I think he's been relaxing enough, thanks to you and Fireball.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Dude, if you think Fireball's relaxing, you've obviously have neverplayed.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 The only reason you're doing this to Joey is because you're bored.Okay, it's not his fault that you're unemployed.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I am not unemployed. I'm on sabbatical!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Come on look guys, don't fight.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 And the reason I'm doing this is because I am Joey's friend. And ifyou were a good friend, you'd be doing the same thing.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Oh, so being a good friend means acting like a total jerk?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 If it does? Then you're an amazing friend of mine.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Hey-hey guys, hey! How about we settle this over a friendly game ofFireball? Huh? I'll go unhook the smoke detectors!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 How about we settle this right now!  There! Now,no one's going to the game. Ha-ha-ha!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 I paid for those tickets!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 No you didn't. You said you would, but you never did!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Oh yeah! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 so we finally get to the top of the mountain and airhead here  forgets the camera!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Oh, y'know the same thing happened to me one time.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 When did that happen to you?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Don't you remember when we were jogging in the park and we saw that reallypretty bird and wanted to take a pictureI didn't have my camera!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Oh yeah. First off all, chasing the Churo guy isn't jogging.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 Oh, this is so good  you have got to try it. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Oh, damn! I got it on my pants.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 Here, I'll get it. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	 We'd better take these pants off upstairs or that stain's gonna set.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Yep.  I'm gonna wear these on our date tonight.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Oh, great!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Okay, bye!  Oh my God!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 That was unbelievable! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Okay, see? I told you!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Yeah, wow, sorry Rach.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 I don't believe they're brother and sister.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 They're brother and sister!!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Oh whoa-whoa-whoa! Wait a minute, open up your hand; let me take a look. Quarter. Dime. Lint? Not interested in that.  What's this? A Canadian coin? Get outta here! 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! No drinks near the bucket! Set it down over there andthen you can make a contribution!  And you can leave the hurt bunny look over there too!  Hi Bob!   I thoughtI told you to get outta here!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Bob	 Uh, Phoebe we've been getting complaints and uh, we're gonna move you to aless high-profile spot.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 What?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Bob	 Umm, Ginger's gonna take over this corner.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 That chick can't handle my corner.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Bob	 Look, either you leave, or we remove you.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Phoebe	 Fine.  All right, I'll give you one pointer. Look out forthat bitch. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Oh, hey Rach! I thought we said seven?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Yeah uh, y'know what uh, let's skip it.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 What?! Why?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Umm, you-you and your sister seem to have umm, a very special bond,and
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Oh great! That special bond again! Why do women have such aproblem with the fact that I'm close with my sister?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Well, okay, look. I don't know, listen, I don't know what's going onhere but let's
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Do-do you, do you have brothers?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 No, I have two sisters. But one of them has a very masculine energy.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Are you close with them?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 No-no, they're not very nice people.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	 Okay, listen, I really like you. Okay? I think this can go somewhere. Sowhat if I'm close to my family, are you gonna let that stand in the way of us?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Well, uh, I-I don't know. See when-when you put it that way y'know itdoes sort of
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Krista	  Danny! Hurry up! The bath is getting cold!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Danny	  What?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Yeah, okay, I'll see you later. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Oh hey! There's some kids playing in the street, you wanna go downthere and give them a project, ruin their day?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Hey, if they have a ball maybe you can stick razor blades in it and teachthem a new game, Gonna Need Stitches Ball.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  Hey guys! I was at the library all morning and I alreadyfinished my five pages for today!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Yay!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Great! Now, we can go to the Ranger game!  Last night!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 No dude, Ross tore up the tickets!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I guess when you don't have so many distractions, it's easier for you tofocus. Huh?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Yeah or also when you don't have somebody breathing down your neck ALLTHE LIVE LONG DAY!!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Yeah, well, that's fine, but the important thing is that I finished it.And uh, I think it's really good, but y'know it'd really help me is if I could hear it. Sowould you guys read it for me?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 All right. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 All right. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Okay.  "It's a typical New York City apartment. Two guysare hanging out." Ross 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Hey man.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 What is up?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 About yesterday, I was really wrong. I am sorry.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 No, it was me. I'm sorry. I over reacted.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 Maybe it was both of us, but we had our best friend's interest But we had our best friend's interest at heart.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 Could I be more sorry. 
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	 I don't know, I'm one sorry polentologist.  All rightJoey, we get it.  I'm sorry.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	  I'm sorry too.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 Oh no! No-no, keep reading! The good part's coming up. Keep going.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Ross	  I am sorry, Chandler.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 I am sorry, Ross.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 A handsome man enters.  Hey! How'sit going guys? I don't know what you two were talking about, but I'd like to say thanks toboth of you. You,  you wouldn't let me give up on myself, and you  wellyou co-created Fireball. The end.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Chandler	 This took you all day?!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 No-no, this only took five minutes. I spent the rest of the day coming upwith new, Ultimate Fireball.  Ha-ha!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	  Okay, it's a typical New York City apartment.Two girls are just hanging out.
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 Hi, how are you doing Kelly?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 I'm doing just fine! God, Tiffany, you smell so great!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 It's my new perfume. Why don't you come closer where you can reallyappreciate it?
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 Oh, y'know Joey, you are sick!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Monica	 This is disgusting!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Rachel	 I'm not reading this!
05	10	0510	The One With The Inappropriate Sister	Joey	 What?! Wait-wait-wait! The handsome man was about to enter!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Jay Leno	  Is there any entertainment there? What are peopledoing?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 All right! Here we go! 1999! The year of Joey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  We're very happy for you.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 What's the matter?!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 We wanted to kiss at midnight, but nobody else is going to soy'know
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 All right, I'll take care of it.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Oh no, wait! Joey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  73! 72! 71!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Ross! Ross! Ross, listen! Who are you kissing at midnight, huh? Rachel orPhoebe?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 What?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Well you gotta kiss someone, you can't kiss your sister.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Well, who's gonna kiss my sister.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Chandler.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Awww, man! Really?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Dude-dude, who would you rather have kiss your sister, me or Chandler?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 That's a good point.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Oh well, since I have that whole history with Rachel, I guess Phoebe.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Okay, great!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 All right.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Pheebs! Pheebs! Ross wants to kiss you at midnight!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 It's so obvious, why doesn't he just ask?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Rach! Rach! Listen, I'm gonna kiss you at midnight.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 What?!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Well, everyone's gotta kiss someone. You can't kiss Ross you got thehistory.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 So?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 So? Who would you rather have kiss you, me or Chandler?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Oh, good point.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	All	  3! 2! 1! HAPPY NEW YEAR!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  Happy New Year!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Happy New Year.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  Happy New Year, Pheebs!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 You too!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	  Happy New Year, Joey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 So did that do anything for ya?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Y'know what? I'm gonna go out on a limb and say no divorces in '99!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 But your divorce isn't even final yet.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Just the one divorce in '99! Y'know what, I am gonna be happy this year. Iam gonna make myself happy.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Do you want us to leave the room, or?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Everyday I am gonna do one thing that I haven't done before. Thatmy friends is my New Year's resolution.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Ooh! That's a good one! Mine is to pilot a commercial jet.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 That's good one too, Pheebs. Now all you have to do is find aplaneload of people who's resolution is to plummet to their deaths.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Maybe your resolution is to not make fun of your friends, especially theones who may soon be flying you to Europe for free on their own plane.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 She has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying up your nose thanyou do of not making fun of us.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 In fact, I'll bet you 50 bucks that you can't go the whole year withoutmaking fun of us. Eh, y'know what, better yet? A week.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 I'll take that bet my friend. And you know what, paying me the 50bucks could be the "new thing you do that day!"  And itstarts right now!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 All right, my New Year's resolution is to learn how to play the guitar.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Ohh.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Really?! How come?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Well, y'know those special skills I have listed on my resume? I would loveit would be great if one of those was true.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Do you want me to teach you? I'm a great teacher.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Really? Who-who have you taught?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Well, I taught me and I love me.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah that'd be great! Thanks Pheebs!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Op, look! Claire forgot her glasses! And she's gonna be really needingthese to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his deskdrawer, if you know what I'm talking about.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Hey Rach, maybe your resolution should be to umm, gossip less.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I don't gossip!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I passthat information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. Imean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Well if Ted Kopel talked about his coworkers botched boob jobs, I would.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 What? They were like this! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Woman	 I'll see you tomorrow.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Okay!   Hey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler, Joey	 Hey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 I just asked that girl out.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Nice!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Nice!! Yeah! Is that part of your resolution, your new thing for today?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Yes it is. See. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  Elizabeth Hornswoggle?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 That's right, uh, Elizabeth Hornswoggle.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Horn-swoggle.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 You all right Chandler? Is there something funny about that name?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 No. No, I just think that maybe I-I'd heard it somewhere before. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh really! Where? Somewhere funny I'd bet! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Hi, Pheebs!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Hey! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Oh-oh, guess what? I-I have a date with Elizabeth  Hornswoggle.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Hornswoggle?  Ooh, this must be killing you.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 All right, see you later.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 See ya! All right Pheebs, I am ready for my first lesson. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Okay.  Oh no-no-no, you don't touch theguitar! First you learn here,  then you learn here. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Umm, okay.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Okay, lesson one: chords. Now, I don't know the actual names of thechords but umm, I-I-I made up names for the way my hand looks while I'm doing them.   So then, this is Bear Claw. Okay, umm,Turkey Leg and Old Lady. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 What an interesting approach to guitar instruction. Y'know some mightfind it amusing, I myself find it regular.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Hey everybody, Rachel was so good today. She didn't gossip at all.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I didnt! Even when I found outumm, all right, well let'sjust say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keepit. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Hey, Pheebs! Check-check this out. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Ooh, you nailed the Old Lady! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah listen so, I thought I was getting better, so on my way home today Istopped by this guitar store and
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Did you, did you touch any of the guitars while you were there?Did you?!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 No.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Give me your hands.  Strings.Gimme it!  Pick. Do you want tolearn to play guitar?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yes!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Then don't touch one!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  Hi!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ben	 Hi! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Hi Ben!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ben	 Auntie Monica!! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  Ross is wearing leather pants! Does nobody elsesee that Ross is wearing leather pants?  Someone comment on thepants!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I think they're very nice.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 I like 'em.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 I like them a lot.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 That's not what I had in mind! See, people like Ross don't generallywear these types of pants. You see, they're very tight.  Maybethere's something in that area.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Oh see, I-I needed a new thing for today and there's this leather storethat always smells so good and I thought to myself, "Wow,  I neverreally owned a good smelling pair of pants before."
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Oh come on!! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  Okay, seriously, what do you think?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 You look like a freak.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Awful, absolutely awful. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 What are you, what are you doing?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 It's my New Year's resolution!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 What, to blind my child?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 No! To take more pictures of all of us together. I mean I really thinkit's the best resolution because everyone will enjoy the pictures.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Well, everyone will enjoy my music as well. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  My God! These pants are burning up!   Oh come on, she wants to snuggle now!What is she trying to kill me? It's like a volcano in here!  Are you hot? 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth Hornswoggle	 No.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Okay, it must just be me then.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 That was just the pants on the couch. Umm, hey, do you, do you mind if Iuse your bathroom?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth	 No, go ahead.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Thanks. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth	  Hey, my favorite part is coming up!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 'Kay!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Oh my God!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Tiger!  Dragon! Iceberg!!  Joseph, did you even study at alllast night?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yes! Yes, I did.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Then do Iceberg!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	   G-sharp.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 G-sharp? Have you been studying the real names of the chords? Have you?  Oh my God! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 What?! I didn't touch a guitar!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 No, but you're questioning my method!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 No, I'm not questioning it, I'm saying it's stupid!  What?! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Thank you. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Y'know none of my other student thought I was stupid.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Your other student, was you!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, y'know maybe you just need to try a little harder!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	  Look, maybe I need to try a real teacher!Right here! Here! Andy Cooper, he teaches guitar and look ooh, there's a nice picture ofhim with a little kid and THE KID'S GOT A GUITAR!!!!!! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Fine! You go learn from your qualified instructor! But don't come cryingto me when everyone's sick and tired of hearing you play Bad, Bad Leroy Brown!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	  "Baddest man in the whole damn town."
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Oh, fine! Take his side! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	  I can't wait to be with you! I'll sneak over as soon as Rosspicks up Ben. I'll just tell Rachel I'm gonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	  Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Arghh!! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	  Hello?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	  Joey, it's Ross! I need some help!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Uhh, Chandler's not here.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Well, you can help me!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Okay.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Listen, I'm in Elizabeth's bathroom
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Nice!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 No, I-I got really hot in my leather pants so I took them off but theymust have shrunk from the-the sweat or-or-or my legs expanded from the heat. Look, I-Ican't put them back on. I can't!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh. That is quite a situation. Uh, do you see any like, powder?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Powder! Yeah! Yeah, I have powder!  
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Good-good, okay, sprinkle some of that on your legs, it'll absorb some ofthe moisture and then you can get your pants back up.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Yeah, okay, hold on!  They're not coming on man.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Umm, do you see anyoh, Vaseline? 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Ohh, I-I see lotion, I have lotion! Will that work?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah, sure, spread some of that on there.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Hold on.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Ross? You okay?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 They're still, they're still not coming on man and the lotion and thepowder have made a paste!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Really?! Uhh, what color is it?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 What difference does that make?!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Well, I'm justif the paste matches the pants, you can make yourselfa pair of paste pants and she won't know the difference!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	  Joey, do you have a minute?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Dude, what am I gonna
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	  Uh, Rachel's here, so good luck man, let me know how it worksout. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Oh, Joey, I have such a problem!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh well, you're timing couldn't be better. I am putting out fires all overthe place.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. Okay. Joey, I have got to tell you something!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 What-what is it, what is it?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannottell anyone.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh no, no-no-no-no! I don't want to know!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Yes! Yes! Yes, you do want to know! This is unbelievable!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 I don't care, Rach! Look, I am tired of being the guy who knows all thesecrets but can't tell anyone!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 What? What secrets? You know secrets? What are they?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 And you're not supposed to be gossiping!! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I know, I know! I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up thephone 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 I'm not listening to you!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth	 Ross, umm, you've been in there for a long time. I'm starting to getkinda freaked out.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 All right, I'm coming out. Hey, can you turn the lights off.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth	 No, let's just leave the lights on.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Elizabeth	 Oh my God!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 I had a problem.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Hey, Pheebs?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 No, I can't talk to you! I don't have a fancy ad in the Yellow Pages!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Look, Pheebs, I just, I wanna apologize for, for saying that your methodwas stupid and-and maybe ask you to be my teacher again. And-and I promise, I won't toucha guitar until you say I'm ready.  Youreally think I'm ready?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Uh-huh!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Wow! Cool! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	  Was the chord at least right
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 No!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Oh my God!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 We heard about your pants, I'm so sorry.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 This year was supposed to be great! But, it's only the second day and I'ma loser with stupid leather pants that don't even fit!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	All	 No. No, you're not a loser.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Look at me! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Hey, hey, look. Look Ross, Ben drew a picture of you!  Huh? You're-you're a cowboy!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Oh, be-because of the leather pants.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 See? Ben doesn't think you're a loser, he thinks you're a cowboy! Nowthat's something.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Yeah!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 That really is something; that's really cool.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Howdy partner!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Ross	 Maybe I should get another pair! Ooh, y'know, they-they had some withfringe all down the sides.  I'm gonna go kissBen goodnight.  I can't believe he thinks I'm acowboy.  I would make a good cowboy. 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Monica	 Okay, now that everything's wrapped up here, I think I'm, I'm gonna godo my laundry.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	 Oh yeah, me too. Y'know if this shirt is dirty.  Yep.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Okay, I'm gonna go too. I'm gonna go to the airport. I figure if I hangaround there long enough, someone's bound to leave one of those planes unattended.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Good luck, honey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Bye! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Hey, uh, Joey?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Umm?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh, no! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would beokay and then we could talk about it. Right?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Well, then it wouldn't be a secret. So yeah, that would be okay. Yeah.Yeah!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	  Yeah. Well.  Hey uh Joe, would mind going over toChandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Now? You want me to go over there now?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Do you know something?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Do you know something?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 I might know something.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 I might know something too.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 What's the thing you know?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 I can't tell you what I know.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Well then I can't tell you what I know.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Okay, fine.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 You don't know!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 All right, how about I go over there and I will walk intoChandler's bedroom and I will see that thing that I think that I know is actuallythe thing that I think that I know! 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	  YOU KNOW!!!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 AND YOU KNOW!!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Yeah, I know!!!!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Chandler and Monica?!! Oh, this is unbelievable!! How long have youknown?
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Too long! Oh my God, Rach, I've been dying to talk to someone about thisfor so long! Listen, listen, we can't say anything about this to anybody, they're so weirdabout that! Listen 
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey, Rachel	 Hey!
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 Hey! It's raining. I don't want to fly in the rain. So
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Joey	 Oh, I am going to go for a walk in the rain.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Rachel	 Ohhh, yeah, me too.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Phoebe	 That's weird.  I bet they're doing it.
05	11	0511	The One With All The Resolutions	Chandler	  Oh good, okay, I can't take it anymore. I can't take itanymore. So you win, okay? Here!  Pheebs?Flying a jet? Better make it a spaceship so that you can get back to your homeplanet! And Ross, phone call for you today, Tom Jones, he wants his pants back! AndHornswoggle? What are you dating a character from Fraggile Rock?! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Come on Joey!!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Rach, I told you everything I knew last night! Look, it's not that big of a deal,so Monica and Chandler are doing it.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 I can't believe you would say that!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Sorry. Monica and Chandler are making love.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 No! I mean come on! This is a huge deal!  Fine I wantI need more details, who-who initiated the first kiss?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  I don't know.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Is he romantic with her?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 I don't know.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Are they in love?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  I don't know.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 You don't know anything.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Ohh, I know one thing!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 What?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 They did it right there on the couch. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Hey Ross!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	  Hey-yeah.  Hey Gunther, can I havea scone please?  Wanna hear some good news? Someone I know is gettingmarried! Yeah! And weddings are happy occasions! Oh, by-the-by it's my ex-wife Emily!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	All	  What? Oh!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Sorry man.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Gunther	 Here's your scone.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Oh, thanks Gunther.  STUPID BRITISH SNACKFOOD!!!!!!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Did they teach you that in your anger management class?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Hey, you know what might help you deal with it? Think of it this way, you andEmily are in the past and you can't be mad about the past. So are you still mad about theLouisiana Purchase?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Pheebs, I dont think anyone's mad about that.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Exactly! Because it's in the past!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  Anybody gonna eat that?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Look at us all dressed up for the big office party! By the way, what are wecelebrating?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh, we had a lot of liquor left over from the Christmas party.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I think this is so cool because none of our friends are here and we can be areal couple. We don't have to hide.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 I know, I can do this. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Ooh, and I can do this. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Both	 We can't do that. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Hey Bing!   Wo-ho-ho, who's the pretty ladyand what the hell is she doing with you?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 I asked myself that very question, sir. Uh,  this isMonica.  This is my boss, Doug. Doug this is Monica.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Hi, nice to meet you!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Hi! And this is my wife Kara.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Kara	 Nice to meet you Monica. Bing! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Say uh, Bing, did you hear about the new law firm we got working for us?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 No, sir.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Yeah, Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Come on honey, let's go drink our body weight. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 What was that?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 What?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 That noise you just made?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh, that was my work laugh.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Really? Your work laugh?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh, believe me, to survive this party, you're gonna have to come up with onetoo.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 All right, check me out.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 says $30 Father; same as in town.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Hey! Everybody at work loved you last night! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Really?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 And! They like me more just because I was with ya! I think yourepaired a lot of the damage from when they met Joey. And Doug wants us to play tenniswith them. He's never even talked to me outside of work. Except for that time whenwe bumped into each other at that strip club.  Strip church. Anyway,I'm gonna go try and find a racquet.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Hey, I thought you already had one.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh I used too, but then Joey thought it would be fun to go to Central Parkand hit rocks atbigger rocks.  HeyRach, do you have a tennis racquet?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Oh umm, y'know I lent it to Joey and I never actually got it back.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Okay, good luck with that. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	  Hey!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Hi!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 What's up?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 What are you doing here? I thought you had to do inventory all day.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with myfriend Monica. Y'know I-I feel that we don't talk anymore. How are you? What is new withyou?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Uhh, not much. Uh, work's good.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Oh y'know what, we dont have to talk about work. We can talk aboutanything!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Okay. Umm
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Hey! Y'know what? Let's talk about relationships!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Okay, what's going on with you?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Nothing! You go!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Well, I-Ithere was this guy at the bank that I thought was cute umm, butI don't anymore.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Wow that's uh, juicy. Umm,  y'know what though Mon, I actually dohave a lot of work to do so if-ifare you sure there's just not anything else?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Yes, I'm sure! Rachel is there something that you want to talk me about?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 No!   If there was I wouldn't tell you.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Okay, then what happened?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	  Ohh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh.  You'll get your turn!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	  Hey Pheebs, what's going on?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Nothing!   Thisis not over!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 No! No! No!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 What?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 I was up all night writing this really nasty letter to Emily! It was perfect andnow it's all covered in-in  Actually, thanks!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  All right! Everybody ready to go to the movies?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Uh actually, I think I'm gonna skip it.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Really?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Yeah, I'm gonna stay and read my book. I just wanna be alone right now.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Oh. Are you sure you don't want to come? Tom Hanks, Meg Ryan, they get mail andstuff.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 That's okay, Joe.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 All right, let's go Pheebs.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	  Oh God!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Bing! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Kara	 Oww!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Game!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Well, I gotta tell ya Bing; that partner of yours is a real tiger. Are you all right sweethart?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Kara	  I'm not all right.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 We're, we're just gonna get a little sip of water.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Am I on fire today or what?! Those birds are browned, basted, and ready to becarved!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Okay, easy Martina. I think we should let them win the next game.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I'm sorry, I don't understand what you just said.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Let them win one.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Are you crazy?! We own those two! I mean look at 'um, he can't breath and she'spopping pills.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 You're not even giving them a chance!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 They have racquets don't they?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Uh Bing, I think we're gonna make this the last game.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh yes, sir! Put me out of my misery. Are you sure you never played pro?  Please let them win!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I'll take it down to 95% but that's the best I can do.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oopsey, missed it!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I got it! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Nice shot.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I got it!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Long! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I can't believe you let them win!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Yeah, at least you hid your feelings well about it. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I was frustrated.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 It was my racquet.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I was frustrated with you!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 If we hadn't lost the game they never would've invented us to dinner tomorrownight.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Y'know what really bothers me? Isit's how-how different you act aroundthem! I mean y'know the throwing the tennis games, the fake laugh, the "I'll see youaround, Bing!" "Not if I see you first, Doug!"  Igotta tell you, I don't like Work Chandler. Okay? The guy's a suck-up.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Okay y'know what, because you said that, I'm not putting out tonight.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I'm telling you, something's wrong! My brother does not stay out all night.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Maybe we should check the trash chute.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Ross couldn't fit down the trash chute.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 That's right, he almost could. Which is exactly how I got stuck there.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 There he is!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Oh my God! Where the hell have you been?!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Just, y'know out.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Ohh, out, oh God, I don't know why we didn't think to check there!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 What were you doing?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 I uh, went to a bar. And then I just uh, just walked around for a while.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 You walked around all night in the city by yourself?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  He hooked up! He hooked up with someone.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Look, I don't have to answer your questions! Okay? I'm a big boy, I can dowhatever I want!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 He hooked up!! Tell us about her!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	  Ross you left you scarf in Hey you guys. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Uh-oh-okay. Uh-oh-okay. I know what you all are thinking. But Chandler is in Yemen!I'm a young woman! I have needs! I can't wait forever!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Yeah! No that's what I was thinking.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 So I'm asking you please, take a moment before you judge me.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Oh, nobody's judging you. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Oh! Okay!  You, Mister Right Place at the Right Time, call me! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Okay, look, I-I know what you guys are going to say
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 You two will have very hairy children.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Okay, I didn't know you would say that.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Ross! Janice?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 All right, hold on! Hold on. Hold on. This is Ross, okay? He's our friend. Heobviously went crazy. He obviously lost his mind.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Look, I didn't lose my mind! Okay, Janice and I have a lot in common!We've-we've both been divorced. We-we both have kids.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 So are you actually gonna see her again?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Phoebe! Don't put ideas in his head!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 I am gonna see her again.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Damnit Phoebe!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	  Okay, I have to tell you something that I have never admitted duringour entire friendship! But, when we were in high school I made out with James Farrell evenwhen I knew that you liked him! Wow, that feels so good to get off my chest! Okay, you go!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 My turn? What-what are you talking about?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Ugh, Monica, I know about you and Chandler.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 What?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 I overheard you guys on the phone the other day, and you said, "I'll justtell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple of hours." And he said,"Laundry? Is that my new nickname?" And you said, "No! You know whatyour nickname is, Mr. Big."
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Well. Sounds like you're writing yourself a little play there Rach. Wow! Let meknow how that one turns out.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Well, I wouldn't know because I got so freaked out that I hung up the phone.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Well, if you had kept listening, you-you would have heard me call him Mr.Bigot.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 What?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Mr. Bigot. He tells the most racist jokes.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 All right. So you're telling me that there is nothing going on between you andChandler.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Me and Chandler?! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 All right, put your 20 bucks down. First one to find the tasty treat wins. Okay?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 All right. Let's get the contestants out of their isolation booths.  Andthey're off! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Judge rules, no violation.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Ohhh.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	  Hey guys!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Yeah!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Y'know what? It sounds so weird to say this but, I just had a great day withJanice! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 What?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Are you serious?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Yeah! I opened up to her about all the terrible stuff that's been happening tome. I mean I talked for hours.  Itis amazing to have someone give you such-such focused attention.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 You don't need Janice for that, you've got us. We
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 And the duck gets the Nutter-Butter!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	  No!! Hey-hey that's not a Nutter-Butter, that's just anold Wonton!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Judge rules, Nutter-Butter.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Phoebe	 Ohh, tough call.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Yeah.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 But seriously, I believe that we should all support President Clinton. And herhusband Bill. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Kara	 So how do you kids like your coffee?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Oh, none for me. Thanks.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Just a little bit of sugar.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Well, maybe I'll bring it out and have Monica stick her finger in it. That oughtasweeten it up, huh? 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	  How does that laugh not give you a headache?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh, you get used to it.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Y'know, I-I-I don't think that I can. So if you don't mind, maybe this will beit for me on the work things.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 So I laugh at my boss's jokes, what's the big deal?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I'd rather hang out with a sniveling work weasel guy when I can be hanging outwith my boyfriend who I actually respect.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Oh. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	  Uh, I gotta apologize for Kara's coffee. Y'know, I feel sorry for itif it ever got in a fight, it's not strong enough to defend itself.  Did you hear what I said Bing?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 What?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 The joke Bing. What's the matter with you?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Well, I-I just didn't think it was funny sir.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Doug	 Excuse me?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Well, I just
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	  Honey, I just don't think that you understood the joke.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Really?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Yeah! I mean it was really funny, I-I just don't think you got it. You seeKara's coffee is-is-is weak tasting, okay? But-but what Doug was-was imply that it wasweak physically. You get it now honey?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 I think I do!  Thank you, Monica.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I thought you could use the help.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Coffee in a fight! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	  Hey Rach! Hey, you mind if I read my comic books in here?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Sure! Why?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Oh well, Chandler and Monica are over there and it's kinda hard to concentrate.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 What?! She just called and said that she was gonna be working late! She keepslying to me! That's it! Y'know what? I'm just gonna go over there and confront them rightnow!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	  All right, so you're telling me that I have to tell racistjokes now?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Sorry! I'm justI'm not very good at this! I'm a terrible liar and I hatehaving to lie to Rachel!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 But we're not ready to tell yet!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I know! It's just thatever since high school Rachel was the one person Itold everything too. Y'know? I miss that so much now. She's my best friend.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	  Joey?! Oh my God, Rachel!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Hey! Hi!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Wh-wh-what are you doing here? (She tries to pull her shirt down to cover thefact that she's wearing men's boxers.]
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Well, I was actuallyI-I came over here to-to borrow this lamp. To umm,look at my books, y'know, see them a little better.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Okay great! 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Great! Umm, well what-what I was doing in Chandler's room is that umm, I wascleaning it! In fact, he pays me to clean it!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Oh! What a great way to earn some extra pocket money.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Y'know when I said to you earlier that I was at work umm, I'm at my new work.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 That's good enough. Right?  Okay, well umm, I'm gonna go look at mybooks!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Monica	 I'll get back to my new job.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Rachel	 'Kay.  Congratulations on your new job. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Man, she is really gullible.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Gunther	 Here you go. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Thanks!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Actually, I should get going.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Are you sure? Because I can stay out as late as you want. I told you how I'm onsabbatical from work, right?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Yes! Yes! You did!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Oh
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 What is wrong now?!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 This isn't what I ordered! Man! Can anything go right in my life?! First mymarriage falls apart and then
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 I know! I know! And then you lose your apartment! And then you lose your job!And then your ex-wife gets married so fast! And now the coffeeahh!! Ross, we need totalk.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Okay. Sometimes I feel
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 No-no-no, no. I'm going to talk. I believe that the sun has set on ourday in the sun.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Huh?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	  You're a very sweet person Ross, umm, unfortunately I don'tthink I can take another second of you whining!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Let-let me make sure I'm hearing this right, you're ending this with me because I'mtoo whiney?  So you're saying, I've become so whiney thatI annoy you, Janice.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Well yeah!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 OHMYGOD!!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Are you gonna be okay?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 I am now.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Joey	 Umm, hi.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Janice	 Oh hi! Well, I guess that's two out of three, Joey. 
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Dude, we got to talk.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 I just wanted to tell you something before you heard it from someone else and Ihope this isn't too weird, but uh, I had uh, a thing with Janice.  What you're-you're not mad?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 Why would I be mad?
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Well, because y'know there are certain rules about this kind of stuff. You don'tuh, you don't fool around with your uh, friend's ex-girlfriends or possible girlfriends orgirls they're related to.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	  I am mad! But youknow what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna forgive you! Because that's what friends do! Theyforgive their friends when they do everything you just said, all on the list there. Well,but I want you to remember that I forgave you.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 Okay.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 I also want you to remember that I let you live here rent free!
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Ross	 All right.
05	12	0512	The One With Chandler's Work Laugh	Chandler	 And, I want you to remember that I gave you twenty  sevendollars. No strings attached. Now, if you can't remember that, I think we should write itdownlet's write it down!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 I can't believe we've never done this before! It's sooo good! Sogood for Monica! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Oh! Look at that, time's up! My turn!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 That was a half an hour?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 It's your timer.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Y'know, I don't like to brag about it, but I give the bestmassages!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 All right, then massage me up right nice!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Ah! Ahh!! Ahh!!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 It's so good, isn't it?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 It's so good I don't know what I've done to deserve it!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Say good-bye to sore muscles!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Good-bye muscles!!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 I'm telling you, she gives the worst massages ever!! Okay, it was likeshe was torturing me for information. And I wanted to give it up I justI didn't knowwhat it was!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Chandler, if it really hurts that bad you should just tell her.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Look, for the first time in my life I'm in a real relationship. Okay,I'm not gonna screw that up by y'know, telling the truth.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	  Hey.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Whoa, dude, look out! You almost crushed my hat! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Sorry.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	  And the bunny got away. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	  This would be the place where you explain the hat.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Oh! Yeah, look there's this play all right? And I'm up for the part ofthis real cool like suave international guy. A real clothes horse. So I figure thateveryone at the audition is gonna be wearing this kinda y'know, ultra-hip, high fashionstuff.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 And you're gonna make them all disappear.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Yeah, like you could find something as sophisticated as this.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Done.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Joey, if you wanna look good, why don't you just come down to the store?I'll help you out.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Great! Thanks, Rach!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Sure!  God, please take those off!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 All right. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, how's it going?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Hey.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Hey! Umm, well, only okay because I just got back from, from thehospital.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 What?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Is everything okay?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Are you all right?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, no-no-no. I'm fine. I'm okay, but umm, my Grandma sorta died.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Pheebs! Sorry!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 It's okay, I mean she had a really incredible life. And it's not likeI'm never gonna see her again, y'know she's gonna visit.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Well maybe, maybe she's with us right now?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Yeah, her first day on a new spiritual plane and she's gonna come to thecoffeehouse!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	  Guys! Guys! I just saw two people having sex in acar right outside.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Uhh, Pheebs' Grandmother just died.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Ohh my God, I'm so sorry.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 It's okay. Actually y'know what, it's kinda cool. 'Cause it's likey'know, one life ends and another begins.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	  Not the way they're doing it. What, what happened? How didshe die?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well umm, okay we were in the market and she bent down to get someyogurt and she just never came back up again.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Pheebs, I'm so sorry.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 It was really sweet. The last thing she said to me was; "Okay dear,you go get the eggs and I'm gonna get the yogurt and we'll meet at the checkoutcounter." And y'know what? We will meet at the checkout counter.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuffright after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 All right, then you'd better show me some of that too then.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Okay, it's missing something. Ooh, I know! Umm, okay. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Really? A purse?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 It's not a purse! It's a shoulder bag.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 It looks like a women's purse.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 No Joey, look. Trust me, all the men are wearing them in the springcatalog. Look.  See look, men, carrying the bag.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 See look, women, carrying the bag.  But it is odd how a women's purselooks good on me, a man.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Exactly! Unisex!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Maybe you need sex. I had sex a couple days ago.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 No! No Joey! U-N-I-sex.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Well, I ain't gonna say no to that.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Who is it?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 It's Phoebe.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Oh great!   Oh, you. Umm, what's up?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Umm, well I sorta have some bad news, can I come in?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Umm, yeahno thanks.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Umm, well, umm Grandma died.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Wow! Didn't she die like five years ago?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 No, she just died today! Okay, umm, we're having a memorial servicetomorrow.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Okay, I know that I went to that all ready.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 No you didn't!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Well, then who's been dead for five years?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well, lots of people! Look, are you coming to memorial service or not?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Umm, no. See I already thought she was dead so I kinda made my peace with it.Plus, I'm going to a concert tomorrow. So I'd invite you, but umm, I only have twotickets left.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Fine. Okay, enjoy your concert. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ursula	 Thanks! Enjoy your funeral.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Hey!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Hey!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Wow! You look just like your son Mrs. Tribbiani!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 What? Are you referring to my man's bag? At first, I thought it justlooked good, but it's practical too. Check it out! It's got compartments for all yourstuff! Your wallet! Your keys! Your address book!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Your make-up!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	  Joey, what are you doing with the bag? You're audition is notuntil tomorrow.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Yeah, but sandwich time is right now. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Joey, y'know you get any mustard on that bag, you can't return it.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Why would I return it? I love this bag!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 All right, then you owe me $350.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Fine! Do you take Vasa or Mustercard? 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	  Joey
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 All right relax, look I'll pay you with the money from the acting job I amdefinitely gonna get thanks to you.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 What's the part, Anti-man?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Hey, don't listen to them. I think it's sexy.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 U-N-I-sexy?  
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well hello, Mrs. Penella! Thank you so much for coming! Well, okay look,here's your umm, 3-D glasses and Reverend Pong will tell you when to put them on.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Hi sweetie!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Hey, how are you holding up?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Hey Pheebs, I'm so sorry.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	  Hey, y'know what? My Grandma had the exact same bag!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Here, I brought you some flowers. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Thanks!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Pulling flowers out it makes the bag look a lot more masculine.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Man	 Oops, I'm sorry. Excuse me. Is this the umm, the memorial?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Yeah, welcome.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Man	 Hello. Hello.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Umm here's your 3-D glasses.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Man	 Oh, umm, all right.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 So how did you know Francis?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Man	 Well I actually, I-I really, I haven't seen her for years. But umm, well I-Iwas pretty tight with-with her and her daughter.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Really?! What's your name?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Man	 Umm, Frank Buffay. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	  Y'know what? Strike that. My name uh,actually is-is Joe. Uh, Joe umm, Hill.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 You're Frank Buffay?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Shh!  No! Joe Hill!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 You just said
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Y'know what, I gotta go. And thank you so much for coming.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 But
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 What?! What honey?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 What happened?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 That was my dad!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Oh my God!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	  Hey you guys, check it out. Check itout.  It's like it's coming right at me.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Oh, did you catch him?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Wh-what did he say?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 He said, "Nice to meet you Glenda."  Well, obviously I couldn't give him my real name?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Why?! Why not?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Come on, you saw the way he ran out of here! What do you think? He'sgonna stick around and talk to the daughter he abandoned!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 What did you say to him?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well, I said, I told him y'know, that I was the executor person ofFrancis' will and that I needed to talk to him so I'm gonna meet him at the coffee houselater.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Pastor	 Could everyone please take their seats?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 All right, well, I just can't think about that right now. I just wannasay good-bye to my Grandma.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Okay.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 All right, let's go say good-bye.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	  Hey! I'm off to my audition. How do I look?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Ahhh, I think you look great! That bag is gonna get you thatpart.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 And a date with a man!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Y'know what? Make fun all you want. This is a great bag! Okay? Andit's as handy as it is becoming. Now, just because you don't understand something, doesn'tmake it wrong. All right? So from now on you guys are gonna have to get used to the factthat Joey,  comes with a bag! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 All right, I'd better go too. I have to go talk to my dad.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Ooh, Pheebs, what are you gonna say? Are you gonna tell him who you are?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Umm, no, not at first 'cause I-I don't want to freak him out
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Well, but aren't you pissed at him?! I mean this guy abandoned you!I gotta tell you if this were me, this guy would be in some serious physical danger! I mean I-I-I'd walk in there and I'd be like, "Yo, dad! You andme outside right now!"  I kinda scared myself.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Well, at least you scared someone.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Y'know it's funny, you'd think I'd be angry. I mean, you'd thinkI'd wanna rip his tiny little head off. Fortunately, I'm past it.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Phoebe, you do seem a little tense. Here, let me help you. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 All right.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Oh! Get off!! Ow!! Oh, stop it!! Why?! Why are you doing that to me?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 What are you talking about?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 As a masseuse and a human, I'm begging you, never do that to anyone!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	  I give good massages!  I used to give them toRachel all the time before she got allergic! And-and-and Chandler loves them! Watch! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	  He-he does not like it! He hatesit! He's in pain!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 No he's not!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	  Yes, he is!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 What?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 I'm sorry but, ow-owww-owww!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 You've been lying to me? I can't believe you'd do that.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Well, maybe he just didn't want to hurt your feelings.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 But the minute we start to lie to each other  And by 'we' I mean society.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Any time you're ready, Joey.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	  Well, you must be new here. Why don't we get atable and I'll buy you a drink.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	  I'm sorry. Could you, could you try itwithout the purse?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Yeah, sure.  Well, you must be newhere. Maybe we shouldI'm sorry, can I ask you something? 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Sure. What?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Well, first it's not a purse.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Okay, anytime.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 I mean if-if you're thinking it's a woman's bag, it's not. It's a man'sbag!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Okayyyy! Anddd, go!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 All right look, let me show you the catalog!  See? Huh? It's thelatest thing! Everyone's got one! Men! Women! Children! Everyone's carrying them!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Umm, do you sell these bags?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Noooo. No-no-no, these babies sell themselves.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 Okay! Thank you! That was great!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Yeah but I didnt read anything.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	The Casting Director	 I think we've seen enough!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Okay! All right, I'll see ya.   We got it! We got it!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Hey, is Rachel here?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 No.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	  Listen, I just wanted to apologize about thisafternoon and the whole massage thing. Y'know? I-I really like 'em.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Oh, please, stop! Look, we're supposed to be honest with each other. I-Ijust wish you could tell mejust say, "I don't like your massages."
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	  I don't like your massages.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	  See? It's no big deal.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Okay, but now see you're crying!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 I'm not crying about that! I'm crying about something that happened atwork.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 What?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	  My boyfriend said he didn't like my massages.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 It's okay, you don't have to be the best at everything.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Oh my God! You don't know me at all!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Okay, you give the worst massages in the world.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 I'm crying here!!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Okay, hear me out. Okay? You give the best bad massages. Ifanybody was looking for the best bad massage and they were thinking to themselves,"Who's the best of that?" They'd have to go to you.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Huh. So you're saying like umm, if there was an award for the best badmassage, well who would get that?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Oh, it would be you! You! Monica! And you'd get all the votes!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 So maybe they could umm, call the award the Monica?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Absolutely!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Okay. I suck!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Yeah! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Umm, thank you for meeting with me.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Thank you. All right.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Come, sit.  Sit.  Sit!  Umm, all righty, before we get started I justI need you tostate for the official record that you are in fact Frank Buffay.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Oh yes. Yes, yes, I am, uh-hmm.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Okay.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 So, what did Francis leave me?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Huh?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Well, that's why you wanted me to come, right?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Oh yes. Yes. Yeahno. She did. She left you umm,  this lipstick.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Oh. Huh. It's huh, well it's  oh it'sew used. Umm,cool.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Okay. I have just a few questions to ask so I'm going to get out myofficial forms.  Okay, so, question 1) Youand uh, you were married to Francis' daughter Lilly, is that correct?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Yes, yes I was.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Okay, umm, question 2) Umm, did that marriage end A. Happily, B. Medium,or C. In the total abandonment of her and her two children?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 It really says that?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Yeah. See? 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Well then I guess then I-I would I would have to say C.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Hmm, okay, total abandonment. Okay, reasons for abandonment, A.Top secret government work, B. Amnesia, or C. Or you're just a selfish, irresponsible bad,bad man?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Y'know, I don't think I want the lipstick that much.  But umm Oh, would you do me a favor? And umm, would you, would you giveLilly that, please? 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 What?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Well Lilly, when you see Lilly would you give her that, that note?Because I wanted to talk to her at the memorial but, well I pictured her getting mad at methe way you got mad at me and I well, I chickened out. So, uh, I wrote her that note,would you give it to her please?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 But you-you-you came to see Lilly?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Yeah, yeah. Why?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Lilly's dead. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 She what?!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 She's dead.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Are you sure?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well, if she isn't then cremating her was a big mistake.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 I can't believe this. I justI can't believe this.How-howOh my God. How long ago?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 17 years ago.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Oh! What about, what about the girls?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well, Ursula is a waitress and-and she lives in Soho. And Phoebe, is on this couch.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Yep, lipstick and a daughter, big day for you!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Phoebe, I-I-I-umm,  Oops.  I just, I-I-I-I dont, I dont know what to say. Ijust can't believe that you're my daughter, you're so pretty.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Yes. Well, that's neither here nor there.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 So would it, would it make you feel better if I said I was very, verysorry that I left?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Y'know what, it doesnt matter what you say it's not gonna make adifference anyway, so you can just go.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 All right. Well, y'know in my defense I was a lousy father.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 That's a defense?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Yes. Yes it is. I burned the formula and I put your diapers onbackwards. I mean, I made up a song to sing you to sleep, but that made you cry even more!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 You make up songs?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 Well no, just-just that one. But, it was stupid. Let's see, how didit, how did it go. Umm.  
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Frank Sr.	 I just, I y'know, I'm not very good at this. So, umm 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Well, I am. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Phoebe	 Not yet, no. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	  Hi.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	All	 Hey!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Hey man, how did the audition go?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Estelle said I didn't get it. 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 What?! Why? Joey you were so ready for it!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Yeah, I thought so too but, she said the casting people had some problemswith me.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 What kind of problem?
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Well to tell you the truth, they uh,  they had a problem with thebag!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Oh my God!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Ross	 Nooooo!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 Y'know what? It was a stupid play anyway!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Monica	 Y'know, Joey, I think it's time to give up the bag.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 I don't wanna give up the bag. I don't have to give up the bag! Do I Rach? Oh, you think I should give up the bag!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Honey wait, Joey, Im sorry I mean as terrific as I think you arewith it 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Oh, hey! 
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 I just don't know if the world is ready for you and your bag.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Joey	 I can't believe I'm hearing this!
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Rachel	 Wait a minute! Wait a minute! I'm not saying that you shouldnthave a bag, I justit's just there are other bags that are a little less umm, controversial.
05	13	0513	The One With Joey's Bag	Chandler	 Yeah umm, they're called wallets.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Oh hey, you guys, look! Ugly Naked Guy isputting stuff in boxes!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 I'd say from the looks of it; our naked buddy is moving.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Ironically, most of the boxes seem to be labeled clothes.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohh, I'm gonna miss that big old squishy butt.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 And we're done with the chicken fried rice.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Hey! Hey! If he's moving, maybe I should try to get his place!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	All	 Good idea! Yes!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 It would be so cool to live across from you guys!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Hey, yeah! Then we could do that telephone thing! Y'know, you have a can,we have a can and it's connected by a string!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Or we can do the actual telephone thing.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Oh my God! I love this apartment! Isn't it perfect?! I can't believe Inever realized how great it is!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Well that is because your eye immediately goes to the big naked man.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 It's amazing! You better hurry up and fill out an application or I'mgonna beat you to it.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	  Ohh. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use Ugly NakedGuy's bathroom. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler!  Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey!  Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 What?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh my God!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 CHANDLER AND MONICA!!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 OH MY GOD!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 OH!! MY EYES!!! MY EYES!!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Phoebe!! Phoebe!! It's okay!! It's okay!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 NO! THEY'RE DOING IT!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 I KNOW!! I KNOW!! I KNOW!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 YOU KNOW?!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stopscreaming!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	  What's going on?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe, Rachel	 Ohhh!!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 HI!! Hi! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 What?! What?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Nothing! Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get thisapartment!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Actually, it looks really good. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Get in here!!! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 You mean whenever Monica and Chandler where like y'know doing laundry orgoing grocery shopping orOh! All that time Monica spent on the phone with sad Lindafrom camp!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Uh-huh, doing it. Doing it. Phone doing it.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh, I can't believe it! I mean I think it's great! For him. Shemight be able to do better.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	  Hey guys!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Joey! Come here! Come here!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 What? What?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Phoebe just found out about Monica and Chandler.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 You mean how they're friends and nothing more? 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 No. Joey, she knows! We were at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment and wesaw them doing it through the window.  Actually, we saw them doing it up againstthe window.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachelknows?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of usknow that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets wouldfinally be over!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Or, we could not tell them we know and have a little fun of ourown.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Wh-what do you mean?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well y'know every time that they say that like they're doing laundrywe'll just give them a bunch of laundry to do.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Ohhh, I-I would enjoy that!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 No-no-no! No-no wait Rach, you know what would even be more fun? Tellingthem.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Ehhh, no, I wanna do Phoebe's thing.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 I can't take any
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 No! You don't have to do anything! Just don't tell them that we know!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Noo! I can't take any more secrets!  I've got your secrets.I've got their secrets. I got secrets of my own y'know!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 You don't have any secrets!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Oh yeah? Well, you don't know about Hugsy, my bedtime penguin pal. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	  So umm, how-how are we gonna mess with them?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Ugh.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well, you could use your position y'know as the roommate.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Okay.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 And then. I would use y'know the strongest tool at my disposal. Mysexuality.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Hello children!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	All	 Hey!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Okay, watch, learn, and don't eat my cookie.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Hey.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Hey! Ooh, wow that jacket looks great on you!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Really?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Yeah the material feels so softhello Mr. Bicep!Have you been working out?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well, I try to y'know, squeeze things.  Are you okay?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well, if you really wanna know, I'mOh! I can't tell you this.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Phoebe, it's me. You can tell me anything.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Well actually you're the one person I can't tell this too. And the oneperson I want to the most.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 What's going on?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I think it's just y'know that I haven't been with a guy in so long andhow sometimes you're looking for something and you just dont even see that it'sright there in front of you sipping coffeeOh no, have I said to much? Well it's justsomething to think about. I know I will.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 You are so cute! How did you get to be so cute?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well, my Grandfather was Swedish and my Grandmother was actually atiny little bunny.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Okay, now you're even cuter!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Y'know that is a popular opinion today I must say.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 What?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 The weirdest thing happened at the coffee house, I think, I thinkPhoebe was hitting on me.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 What are you talking about?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 I'm telling you I think Phoebe thinks I'm foxy.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 That's not possible!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Ow!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 I'm sorry it's just, Phoebe just always thought you were, you werecharming in a, in a sexless kind of way.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, y'know I-I can't hear that enough.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 I'm sorry, I think that you just misunderstood her.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 No, I didn't misunderstand, okay? She was all over me! She touched mybicep for crying out loud!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 This bicep?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well it's not flexed right now!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Hey Mon, what are you doing now? Wanna come see a movie with us?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Uhh, y'know actually I was gonna do some laundry.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Hey Chandler, wanna do it with me?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Sure, I'll do it with ya.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Okay.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Okay great, hold on a sec!  Oh, here you go! You don't mind do ya? That would really help me outa lot! Thanks!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 I mean I-I don't I think I have enough quarters.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I have quarters! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	  Hey!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Hey Ross! Any word on the apartment yet?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Well, I called over there and it turns out Ugly Naked Guy is subletting ithimself and he's already had like a hundred applicants.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 No-no, I got the edge. I know it's not exactly ethical but I sent him alittle bribe to 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Oh, is it that pinball machine with the big bow on it?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 No.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 That new mountain bike?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 No.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Well what did you send?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 A basket of mini-muffins.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 But there's a whole table of mini-muffin baskets. Which one did yousend?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 The small one.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 What?! You-you actually thought that basket was gonna get you theapartment?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Well yeah! Someone sent us a basket at work once and people went crazyover those little muffins. It was the best day.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Your work makes me sad.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Oh man! I want that place so much!! I was so sure that was gonna work!There's twelve bucks I'll never see again! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Bye!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	All	 Bye!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Bye Chandler!   I miss you already. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Okay, did you see that?! With the inappropriateand the pinching!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Actually, I did!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Okay, so now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Are you serious?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Phoebe knows and she's just trying to freak us out! That's the onlyexplanation for it!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Okay but what about y'know my pinchable butt and mybulging bicepsShe knows!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Joey!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Yeah?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Phoebe knows about us!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Well I didn't tell them!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Them?! Who's them?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Joey!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 And Rachel. I would've told you but they made me promise not to tell!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh man!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 I'm sorry! But hey, it's over now, right? Because you can tell them thatyou know they know and I can go back to knowing absolutely nothing!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Unless
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 No! Not unless! Look this must end now!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But seethey don't know that we know that they know! So
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Ahh yes, the messers become the messies!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Noooo.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh Ross, honey you gotta stop torturing yourself!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Yeah, why don't you just find another apartment?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Look I've already looked at like a thousand apartments this month and noneof them even compares to that one!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Y'know what you should do?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Huh?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 You should find out what his hobbies are and then use that to bond withhim. Yeah! Like if I would strike up a conversation about say umm, sandwiches. Or uh, ormy underwear.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 I'm listening.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	  See?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 That is a great idea! And! I know Ugly Naked Guy because we've beenwatching him for like five years so that gives me back my edge! Oh, let's see nowhe had the trampoline.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 He broke that.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Well, he had gravity boots.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, he broke those too.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 So he likes to break stuff.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Okay, I've got to go pick up Ben but I-I will figure something out.  Hey, didn't he used to have a cat?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I wouldn't bring that up, it would probably just bum him out.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Yeah, poor cat, never saw that big butt coming.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Right. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Hello!  Oh yeah! Hey! Hold on a second she's right here!  It's Chandler.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Oh?  Hello you.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Hello Phoebe, I've been thinking about you all day. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Eh?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well you know that thing you said before, I'd be lying if I said Iwasn't intrigued.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Really?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Yeah, listen, Joey isn't gonna be here tonight so why don't you comeover and I'll let you uh, feel my bicep. Or maybe more.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye!  Oh my God!He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Are you kidding?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 No!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 I can not believe he would do that to MonWhoa!  Joey, do they know that weknow?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 No.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Joey!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 They know you know.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Ugh, I knew it! Oh I cannot believe those two!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess withus?! They don't know that we know they know we know!  Joey,you can't say anything!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 I couldn't even if I wanted too.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Good evening, sir. My name is Ross Geller. I'm one of the people whoapplied for the apartment. And I-I realize that the competition is fierce butI'msorry. I, I can't help but notice you're naked and  I applaud you.Man, I wish I was naked. I mean, this-this looks so great. That is how God intended it.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	  Look at them, they're-they're panicked!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh yeah, they're totally gonna back down!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Oh yeah!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 All right. All right! If he wants a date? He's gonna get a date. Allright, I'm gonna go in.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 All right. Be sexy.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	  Please.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 So Chandler, I-I'd love to come by tonight.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Really?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh absolutely. Shall we say, around seven?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Yes.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Good. I'm really looking forward to you and me having sexualintercourse.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	  Hey-hey, check it out! Check it out! Ugly NakedGuy has a naked friend!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Oh yeah!  Oh my God! That is our friend!  It's Naked Ross! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	All	 Yeah, it is! Naked Ross!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Show time!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Okay, Rachel, get me perfume!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Okay! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 And Joey, get me a bottle of wine and glasses? 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 All right, it'll be great! You just make her think you wanna have sexwith her! It'll totally freak her out!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Okay, listen, how far am I gonna have to go with her?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Relax, she-she's gonna give in way before you do!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 How do you know?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Because you're on my team! And my team always wins!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 At this?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Just go get some!  Go! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	  Okay honey, now I'm gonna try to listen fromright here!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Okay.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Okay? Whoa, wait! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Good idea! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Yeah, oh wait!  
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Oh now, don't give away the farm!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Phoebe.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Chandler.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Come on in.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I was going too.  Umm, I broughtsome wine. Would you like some?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Sure.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 So, here we are. Nervous?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Me? No. You?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 No, I want this to happen.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 So do I.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 I'm gonna put on some music.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Maybe, maybe I'll dance for you. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 You look good.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Thanks! Y'know, that when you say things like that it makes me wanna ripthat sweater vest right off!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well, why don't we move this into the bedroom?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Really?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, do you not want to?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 No. No! It's just y'know first, I wanna take off all my clothes and haveyou rub lotion on me.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  Well that would be nice. I'll go get the lotion.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Listen, this is totally getting out of hand! Okay? She wants me to putlotion on her! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 She's bluffing!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Look, she's not backing down! She went like this! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 He's not backing down. He went to get lotion.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	  Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?! I wanna sit in mychair!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandlerthe sooner this is all over and out in the open.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Ooh!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Rachel	 Okay!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 I like that!  Oh, okay! Show him your bra! He's afraid of bras!Can't work 'em! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Joey!  Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 It's not my first time.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Okay, give me a second!  Did you clean up in here?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Of course.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Oh, you're-you're going?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Umm, not without you, lover.  So, this is my bra.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	  It's very, very nice. Well, come here. I'm very weregonna be having all the sex.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 You should be. I'm very bendy.  I'm gonna kiss you now.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Not if I kiss you first.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Ooh.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but-but kiss.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 Here it comes. Our first kiss.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Okay! Okay! Okay! You win! You win!! I can't have sex with ya!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 And why not?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Because I'm in love with Monica!!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 You're-you're what?!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Love her! That's right, ILOVEHER!!! I love her!!  I love you, Monica.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 I love you too Chandler. 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 I justI thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were inlove!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 Dude!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 And hats off to Phoebe. Quite a competitor.  And might I sayyour breasts are still showing.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Phoebe	 God! 
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Joey	 All right! So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Monica	 Well actually, Ross doesn't.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Chandler	 Yes, and we'd appreciate it if no one told him yet.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 A new place for a new Ross. I'm gonna have you and all the guys from workover once it's y'know, furnished.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Dr. Ledbetter	 I must say it's nice to see you back on your feet.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Well I am that. And that whole rage thing is definitely behind me.
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Dr. Ledbetter	 I wonder if its time for you to rejoin our team at the museum?
05	14	0514	The One Where Everybody Finds Out	Ross	 Oh Donald that-that would be great. I am totally ready to come back towork. IWhat?  No! Wh What are youdoing?!!  GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Chandler!!! Chandler!!! Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you weredoing to my sister! Now get out here!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	  Wow! Listen, we had a good run. What was it? Four? Fivemonths? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care,bye-bye then! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 What are you doing?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Oh, I'm going on the lamb.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Come on Chandler, come on, I can handle Ross.   Hold on!  Hey Ross. What's up bro?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 What the hell are doing?!!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	  Hey, what's-what'sgoing on?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	  Dude! He's right there!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! Mybest friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in lovewith her.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but it'strue, I love him too.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this.   You guys probably wanna get some hugs in too, huh? Bignews!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Awww, no, it's okay, we've actually known for a while.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 What? What? What?! You guys knew?  You all knew and you didn't tell me?!!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Well, Ross, we were worried about you. We didn't know how you were goingto react.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  You were worried about me? You didn't know how I was goingto react? 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Okay, all right, whew! What do you say we all clear out of here and letthese two lovebirds get back down to business? Hey-hey-hey, I-I-I'm just talking here, he-he's the one doing your sister.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Hey, you know what I just realized? If you guys ever have kids
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	  Whoa-whoa-whoa! We're having kids?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	  I call Godfather!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 You can't just call Godfather. Don't you think her brother shouldbe Godfather?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Sure, if you cared enough to call it first.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Guys, you're a few steps ahead of us.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah, big zero gravity moon steps.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Oh! Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Ooh, I'll go in on that with you! I couldn't think of anything.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Okay.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	  Oh, hey Katie! Everyone, this is Katie.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Hi!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	All	 Hi!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 So, are you ready to go?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Yeah, I just gotta run to the bathroom.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Oh sure, right back there. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Hey, where are we going to lunch?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 I was thinking Chinese food.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Ohh, I love Chinese! How did you know I love Chinese?! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 She is so cute! You could fit her right in your little pocket!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 I don't know. I mean I like her a lot, and she's really nice, but
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 But what?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	  She keeps punching me.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 In that cute, little, sweet way she just did?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Hey, it's a lot harder than it looks! Okay?  She-she-she'shurting me.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 I know what you need, you need a bodyguard. Hey Ross, what is Ben doingafter preschool?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Hey listen, come on, Joey is having a problem! A little girl isbeating him up.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Aww, Joey, come here.  Look honey, I know this mustbe really, really difficult for you and I--Oh, I'm sorry. Am I hurting you?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  Hey!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Hey! I brought you some house warming gifts.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Aww.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah. Salt, so your life always has flavor.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Huh.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Bread, so you never go hungry.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Ohh.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 And a scented candle for the bathroom, because well, y'know.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Thanks. Thanks. And thanks again.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Guy	 Hi!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Hi!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Guy	 Welcome to the building. I'm uh, Steve Sarah; I'm president of the tenantscommittee.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh hi! Ross Geller. And this is my friend Phoebe.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Oh hi Phoebe.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Mr. President.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 I came to talk to you about Howard.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Howard?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Yeah, he's the handy man. He's gonna be retiring next week and everyonewho lives here is kicking in a 100 bucks as a thank you for all the hard work type ofthing.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh that's nice.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Yeah. So, do you want to give a check? Or
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh. Uhh
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Oh look, you don't have to give it too me right now! You can slip itunder my door. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 No-no, it's not that, it's just I-I just moved in.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Well, the guy's worked here for 25 years.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Yes, but I've lived here for 25 minutes.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Oh, okay, I get it. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 No wait, look. Look! I'm sorry, it's just I've never even metHoward. I-I mean I don't know Howard.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Howard's the handy man!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Yes but too me he's just, man.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Okay, fine, whatever. Welcome to the building. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  Ugh, can you believe that guy!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah. I really like his glasses.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 so then President Steve told everyone that I was a cheapskate, andnow the whole building hates me! A little kid spit on my knee! Y'know what I'm gonna do?I'm gonna throw a party. That's right. For everyone in the building, and I'm gonna sitthem down and explain to them, I am not a bad guy. I am not a cheap guy! I'm just a guywho-who stands up for what he believes in. A man with principles.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	  Sounds like a fun party.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Hmm. Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't youjust pay the hundred bucks? The party's gonna cost you way more than that.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 It doesn't matter! It's my principles! We're talking about my principles!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Okay, I thought it was about your neighbors liking you.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh, they'll like me. Once they come to my awesome PAR-TAY! Okay, I gottarun. I gotta go get some nametags. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 And that crazy party animal will be your brother-in-law.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Very, very funny, but don't say things like that in front of Monica. Idon't want you putting any ideas in her head.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Umm, Chandler, you do realize that those ideas are probablyalready in Monica's head.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Wh-wh-why?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Well, because she loves you and because you love her.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah, so, what's that supposed to mean?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Hey, Chandler, don't freak out! I'm telling you something you alreadyknow! Come on, she broke up with Richard because he didn't want to have babies. And she'sa woman, and she's almost 30, and y'know it's Monica.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I don't see it that way. Okay? Because, I see two Monicas, the onethat was my friend, who lived across the hall, and wanted to have a lot of babies and thenthe new Monica, who I just started to date. Now, who's to say what she wants?!Im right. I'm right. Am I right?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 No, you're right, you are absolutely right. I mean that makes, thatmakes everything different.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Okay. It's not different at all, is it?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Not unless different means the same.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 You were so funny with that waiter! You're such a nut! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	  Y'know, breadstick fangs are always funny.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 No, you make them funny. You're the funny one! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Uhh, look Katie, uh listen, we-we need to talk. Okay? Umm, look I likeyou. I-I really do, I like you a lot. Okay? But sometimes when you, when you playfullypunch me like that it-it feels like someone's hitting me with a very tiny but very realbat.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Aww, like I could hurt you. Are you making fun of my size? Don't make funof me because of my size! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Isn't this great?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Hmm.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Couldn't you just stay like this forever? Chandler! Couldn't you just stay here forever?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah, here, somewhere else, y'know where-where ever. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Are you okay?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm cool. Casual.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 What-what are you doing?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I'm just hanging out. Y'know, having fun. Y'know with the girl thatI'm seeing casually.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Man, I knew it! I knew you were going to do this!!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 What?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Get all freaked out because everybody was talking and just joking aroundabout marriage and stuff.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Well, you do want all that stuff, right?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Oh and you know what I want!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yes! You want babies! You have baby fever!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 I do not have baby fever!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Oh please, you are obsessed with babies and-and marriage andeverything that's related to babies and-and marriage! I've got an idea, why don't we turndown the heat on this pressure cooker?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Have you lost your mind? Chandler, this isn't about me! This is aboutyou and all your weird relationship commitment crap!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Nah-uh! I know you! Okay? I know the thoughts that you have in thehead--in your head!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 You don't know everything. Did you know that I'm going out with Racheltonight instead of you? Hmm? And did you know that the only baby around here is you?! Anddid you know that I can't even look at you right now?! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Well, I did not know that.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 It's gonna be okay, right? I mean she's not gonna leave me? This is,this is fixable.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross, Joey	 Oh yeah, yeah, sure. Absolutely.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 By me?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh, no!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 No-no.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Well, unless you make some kind of big gesture.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Yeah, big!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Uh-oh, shht! The Misses.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Gunther, can I get a coffee  to go?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Monica. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 I'm still not done not wanting to talk to you.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 What?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Well, that's what we do. Y'know, I-I mess up and then you tell me howto fix it and then I do and then y'know you think I'm all cute again.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Really? I'm really tired of being your relationship tutor. You're gonnahave to figure this one for yourself. All right? Y'know what? If you're too afraid to bein a real relationship, then don't be in one. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Party Guests	  Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard!  Howard! Howard! Howard!  Howard!Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard!  Howard! Howard!Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Howard! Yay!!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Phoebe! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Oh, hi Ross!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 What are you doing?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Oh, I thought this was your party and it turns out its a party forHoward. He's just the sweetest little man! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Guest #1	 See ya Phoebe! Oh and hey, thanks for chipping in!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 You chipped in?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah, uh-huh, a 100 dollars.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Phoebe! I can't believe you gave them money! I thought you agreed it wastotally unreasonable that they asked me for that money!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah, but they didn't ask me! Y'know? This way I'm just y'know, theexotic, generous stranger. That's always fun to be.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Yeah, but you're making me look bad!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 No I'm not. No! If anything I'm making you look better! They'll see youtalking to me and that's--I'm a hit!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	  Oh hey, Pheebs!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Oh hey, Ross. Umm, see, I was thinking maybe you two could switchapartments because Phoebe's more our kind of people. Something to think about. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay, my bad.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Hey!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Hi! Wow! You look, you lookbig.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Thanks! I've been working out. Hey listen, is it obvious that I'm wearingsix sweaters?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Uhhh, yeah. But it's not obvious why.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Well look, Im breaking up with Katie so I had to put on some extrapadding. Y'know? I mean, if she hits me when she's happy, can you imagine how hard she'sgonna hit me when I tell her I'm taking away the Joey love?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	  Hi!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Hey! Hiya!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Hey! Hey, cute jacket!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Oh, thanks! That's so sweet! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Oh! Ow! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Oh, ow! Did Joey tell you to say that? You guys,  are toomuch! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Whoa!  Y'know what Katie? I gotta tell ya I-I-I-I think you arethe one who is too much. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Ohh, Joey has the nicest friends! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Ohh, and the nicest girlfriend! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 You're so sweet! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Ohh, you're so sweet! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Oww!!!! Joey, she just kicked me.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Huh.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 Well? Aren't you gonna do something?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Uhh.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Katie	 You'd better do something, or I'm gonna walk out that door right now!Well? Are you gonna?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Nah.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  Phoebe?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	  That's what I'm saying.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  Phoebe? Phoebe?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Ooh. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Look, this is a disaster! Can't I please just go?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 No! No! I'm talking you up to people. Just give it a little time, allright? Relax, get something to eat! Okay?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 So uh, what did you tell them about me?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Oh, I was telling them about you and Emily. Y'know, try to get somesympathy.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Ohh. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 But somehow you came off as the bad guy.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 What?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Yeah, I think I told it wrong. Y'know, we should talk about that becauseI don't totally understand what happened there.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	  Ohh, this cake is really good!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, see? Things are looking up already!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Guest #2	  Oh my God! Someone cut Howard's cake!  Who would do a think like that?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 3-B!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	All	 Oh yeah, aww!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Okay, you got your free food! You ruined everyone's fun! Don't you thinkit's time you went home?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Guest #3	 Yeah, leave!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	All	 Yeah, get out! Now!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Steve	 Go back to 3-B, 3-B!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 All right, everyone calm down! Everyone calm down! I have something thatI would like to say! Who here likes Ross?  Of course you don't like him! He-hedidn't give you any money, he raised his own hand when I asked, "Who hear likesRoss," and he's wearing two nametags!  I-I'll be honest with youguys, when I first met Ross I didn't like him at all! But then once I got to know him Isaw that he's really sweet and caring and very generous. I mean, all I'm saying isdon't judge Ross before you get to know him all right? I mean, I like all you guys now,but when I first meet you y'know Kurt, I thought, y'know abrasive drunk, umm Lola, mindnumbingly stupid! And okay, you guys   Gold-digger,  cradle robbing perv!So, I think you all know what I mean.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Obviously I didn't think they were gonna start throwing things. I justthought if I kept insulting everyone, you would jump in and defend everyone and then youcould look like the hero.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh wow, yeah! See, I did not get that.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Where's Monica?! Where is she? I need to talk to her! It's urgent! Isshe here?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	  I'm Monica.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I need to talk to you, it's urgent!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Okay.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Okay, I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, y'know a lot of uhh,us thinking. And uh, well I guess there's only one-one way to do this. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Wait what-wh-wh-what are you doing?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	  Monica
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 No-no, don't-don't-don't do it!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Will you marry me?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Oh-no. No. No.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 What a bad idea!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Ohhhh, I cannot look at it! 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Chandler, why are you doing this?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I don't know. But I know I'm not afraid to do this.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Chandler.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I'm doing this because I'm sorry?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Do you umm, you really think the best reason to get married is becauseyou're sorry?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 No, the best reason to get married is pregnancy. Sorry is pretty muchfourth y'know, behind being ready and actually wanting to get married. Will you be my wife?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	  Chandler, umm, I want you to take just a minute and Iwant you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm kinda wishing everyone wasn't here right now.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Honey! Do you know that none of that stuff came from me?! I mean I neversaid I wanted to have babies and get married right now!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Yeah I know, but I was really confused and then I talked to theseguys. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Who? Two divorces and Joey?!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Hey!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 She's right y'know.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 Yeah, but still, cheap shot!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Y'know what? Y'know when I said that I want you to deal with thisrelationship stuff all on your own? Well, you're not ready for that.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 I didn't think I was!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Oh my God, what would have done if I said yes?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Well I would've been happy because I would've be able to spend therest of my life with the woman that I love. Or, you would've seen a Chandler shaped holein that door. 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Hey Ross, will you pass me that knife?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 No, I will not!
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 Oh, it's okay. You don't have to be so mean about it.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 You're right, I'm sorry. Will you marry me?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Phoebe	 Aw, and I was gonna ask you to marry me because I forgot to say hello toyou last week.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Rachel	 Oh no wait Pheebs, I think for something like that you just ask them tomove in with you. But I'm not sure, Chandler?
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 Okay, how long is this going to go on.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Monica	 Well I think the length of teasing is directly related to how insane youwere so, a long time.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Ross	 This is fun. Hey Rach, remember that whole "We were on a breakthing?" Well, I'm sorry, will you marry me? 
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Chandler	 That's not funny.
05	15	0515	The One With The Girl Who Hits Joey	Joey	 That's not funny at all!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 What are you guys doing up?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh, we wanted to finish the crossword before we went to bed. Hey, doyou know a six-letter word for red?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Dark red.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Yeah, I think that's wrong, but there's a Connect the Dots in here foryou later.  Hey, how about maroon?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	  Yes, you are so smart! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Aww, you guys are so cute!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 I know.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 All right, I'll see you in the morning.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler, Monica	 Okay.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Monica	 Y'know, I love doing crossword puzzles with you honey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Joey	 Aww, me too. Now let's finish this and go to bed.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Monica	 Okay! There's only one left, three letter word, not dogbut
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Joey	 Cat.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Monica	 Yes! You are so smart!  I love you.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Dream Joey	 I love you too.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Uhh, we still need a tip.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 All right. Hold on.  I got it. Nickel! How much more do we need?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 A couple of bucks.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Okay, dime!  You guys should probably keep talking; thiscould take a while.  Oh no, wait! Look it! Whoa!  Ohmy God, this is a police badge!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Wow!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh that's so cool! Why would a cop come in here though? They don'tserve donuts.  Y'know what actually, could you discover the badge again? Ithink I can come up with something better than that.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Phoebe, I bet somebody's missing that badge.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yeah, I should probably take it back. Ooh, but you know what? While I'mat the police station, I could check their Ten Most Wanted lists because my friend Fritzyhas been like number 11 forever, so this could be her year! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Hey, you guys!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Hey Joey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Hey.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Hey. That uh, that my sweatshirt?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Oh yes, it is. I'm sorry I borrowed it, I was cold. I hope its okay?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Well uh, it's just that uh, y'know if-if you're gonna be wearing someone'ssweatshirt shouldn't it be your boyfriends--and Im not him.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 I'm sorry, I'll give it back to you.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 No-no! No! I mean it's gonna be all smelling like Monica!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Are you saying I smell bad?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 No! No, you smell like a meadow.  I'm sorry. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 What's with him?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh, y'know what? The last time Joey went to a meadow, his mother wasshot by a hunter.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Ugh!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	  Yeah, I still don't know.  I'm sorry I just wanna make sure that I bought the right couch. I need a couchthat says, "Kids welcome here." But that also says,  "Comehere to me!"
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 What?! You say that to kids?!!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 No! No! No! The "Come here to me" is y'know for the ladies.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross, honey, it's a nice couch. It's not a magic couch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 You picked a great couch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Yeah?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 Yeah. Could you just sign right here please? 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh, sure. Whoa-whoa, what's this? The delivery charge is almost as much asthe couch!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Wait! No, that's ridiculous. Come on, he lives three blocks away!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Yeah, y'know what? I'll take it myself, thank you!  All right Rach, let's go! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Yeah!   Are you kiddin'?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh, come on it's only three blocks! And-and, it's not very heavy, try it!Come on! Come on!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Oh. Oh! I can do it!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Yeah!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 You two are really gonna enjoy that couch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh yeah, we're uh, yeah we're not together. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 Ohh, okay.  Something didn't quite add up there. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 What's that supposed to mean?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 Well you, her, I mean, she's veryy'know. And you'relikey'know.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Not that it's any of your business, but we did go out.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Salesman	 Really? You two?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Yeah! Rach?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Come on, I don't really want to be doing this right now. I am carrying avery heavy couch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Then tell him quickly.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Fine!  We went out.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Not only did we go out, we did it 298 times!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross!! Oh my--ugh!! You kept count?! You are such a loser!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 A loser you did it with  298 times!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Oh. Oh! Ma'am? Excuse me, ma'am? 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 Yes?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 You can't put your cigarette out on a tree!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 Yeah I can, it worked real well.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 No but you shouldn't! Don't ever do that again.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 I won't!  Until I have my next cigarette.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Hold it!  N.Y.P.D! Freeze punk!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 What?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yeah that's right you are so busted.  Book'em.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 Who are you talking too?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Save it Red! Unless you wanna spend the night in the slammer, youapologize to the tree.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 I am not going to apologize to a tree!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 You apologize to the tree right now or I am calling for backup.   Backup! Backup!!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Smoking Woman	 I-I'm sorry! Sorry.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Okay, cancel backup! Cancel backup!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Okay. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Uhh, yes I did but there isn't. Okay, here we go.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Okay, go left. Left! Left! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what? There is no more left, left!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh okay, lift it straight up over your head! Straight up over your head!You can do it! You can do it!  Okay.You got it?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Good-good-good. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Oh-oh! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Yeah, you got it right? You got it right? You got it? 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Any chance you think the couch looks good there?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 so this guy was all  And I'm all, Buffay, Homicide. It was just so cool!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	  Phoebe, you were supposed to take that back!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 I know but I'm having so much fun doing good deeds.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Okay, but impersonating a police officer is a serious thing. You couldget arrested.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 You could get arrested, right now!  All right, yeah, I gotta take it back. I'm totally drunk with power. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	  Hey.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Hey!  Oh.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Hi, Joe.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Yeah, I didnt know you guys were going to be here.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Hey Joey, sweetie, taste this. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  What?! Why?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 What is going on with you?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Nothing!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh, come on! You've been acting strange all day!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 All right! There is something. I kinda had a dream,  but I don'twant to talk about it. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-what-what if Martin Luther King had saidthat?  I kinda have a dream! Idont want to talk about it.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Well, it involved Monica.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 You had a dream about a girl that I am seeing?! Oh, that is so cool! I can't tell you how many times I've dreamt about a girl that he was seeing.  Anyway we're talking about your dream.  Ilove you.  Your dream? 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Don't worry, there wasn't any sex in it or anything. I haven't dreamtabout her like that since I found out about you two--ish. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 What was the dream about?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Well, okay. You were my girlfriend and we were doing the crosswordpuzzle. Y'know like you guys were doing last night. So, that's it. I'm in love with Monicaand I'll be moving out.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Wait, Joey! Joey! That doesnt mean that-that you're in love withme!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 It-it doesnt?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 No!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 No, it can mean anything. Like uh, all of the sudden you're jealousbecause I've become the apartment stud.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 That kinda sounds like your dream dude.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Or, it could mean that-that you saw Chandler and me together and wey'know were being close and stuff and then you just want to have that with someone too.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 In the dream I did enjoy the closeness.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Um-hmm.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Joey, look, are you attracted to Monica? Right here, right now, areyou attracted to her?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Not really.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Well there you have it!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Well sure! I'm just wearing sweats!  But that's good that you're not in love with me, because youjust want a girlfriend!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 No, I don't think it's just about just getting a girlfriend. Y'know? Imean, yeah, I can get a girlfriend! Yeah, we could sit in the chair and do crosswords, buty'know are we ever going to have y'know the closeness like-like you guys have?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Well y'know, Monica and I were friends before we starteddating. So maybe-maybe that's it?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Friends first? That's interesting.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 You become friends after?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 No, never done that either.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Hey, umm, do you guys have that tape measure?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh yeah, it's actually in my bedroom.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	  That's right.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  What's up Joey?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  How you doin'?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Excuse me, is this your car?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Guy	 Yeah.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Well I don't think it's very nice of you to park here, y'know you'reblocking the entrance. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Guy	 Don't worry about it. It's not a problem.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Well, it's a problem for me, which means it's a problem for you 'causeI'm a cop. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Guy	  So am I!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Ohh, no.  Oh okay, so you're a cop which means you can parkanywhere, 'cause I know that 'cause I'm a cop too. So, all right, keep up the good work.10-4. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	  Hey, wait a second! So wait, what precinct are you with?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 I-I'm with the umm, the 57th.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Oh, I know a guy in homicide up there.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 I'm in vice. Yeah, in fact I'm undercover right now. I'm a whore.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Who-who else is in vice up there?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Umm, do you know, umm Sipowicz?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Sipowicz? No, I don't think so.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yeah, big guy, kinda bald.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 No, I don't know him.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	  Dont try to call him or anything,'cause he's not there, he's out. His umm, his partner just died.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Wow umm, tell Sipowicz I'm real sorry for his loss.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 I-I sure will, take care. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	  Hey by the way, I'm sure Sipowicz is gonna be all right. Iheard that kid from Silver Spoons is really good.  And where didyou find my badge?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Oh. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Hey! Joey, would you mind giving me and Ross a hand moving his couch?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Oh, I'd love too, but I got acting class. But y'know what? I guess I canblow that off,  for you.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Thanks!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Uh, hey, Rach let me ask you something. Uh, I was just over there talkingto Monica and Chandler, boy they are really tight.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 I know.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Yeah that's not such a bad situation they got going over there. I'mthinking of getting me one of those.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 What's up Joe?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Well, the reason I think Monica and Chandler are so great
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Yeah?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 is because they were friends first. Y'know? So I asked myself,"Who are my friends?" You and Phoebe, and I saw you first. So
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  What are you saying?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 I'm saying maybe you and I crank it up a notch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Y'know honey, umm, as uh, as flattered as I am that uh, you saw mefirst, uhh, I just, I-I don't think we should be cranking anything up.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 I'll treat you real nice. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Yeah, well, y'know umm Nohoney, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before youdate them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend,build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. Don't hit on your existing friends!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Won't-won't that take longer?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Yeah. Yeah. Oh, but once you find it, ohh it's so worth the wait.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Yeah. I understand. I understand.  Man, I wish I saw Phoebefirst!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Come here to me. No-no, you come here to me.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	  Hey Ross! I brought reinforcements.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh great! What, you brought Joey?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Well, I brought the next best thing.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	  Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Chandler?! You brought Chandler?! The next best thing would be Monica!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Y'know, I would be offended, but Monica is freakishly strong, so
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Look, I-I drew a sketch about how we're gonna do it.  OkayRach,  that's you. That's the couch.  
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Whoa-oh, what's-what's that? 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh, that's me.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Wow! You certainly think a lot of yourself.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 No! That's-that's my arm!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	  Oh, I see. I thought you just really, reallyliked your new couch.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Y'know what? Just-just follow my lead. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Okay!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Okay.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Come on, Chandler. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 All right.  Okay, here we go!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 All right, ready?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Yeah.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Turn.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	  Okay.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Turn! Turn!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Okay, I don't think we can turn anymore!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Ross, I don't, I just don't think it's going to fit.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Oh yeah it will! Come on, up! Up-up-up! Up! Yes! Here we go! Pivot!  Pivot! Piv-ot!Piv-et!! Piv-ett!!! Piv-et!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Okay, I don't think it's going to pivot anymore.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler, Rachel	 You think?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 All right, let's uh, let's bring it back down and-and try again.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Okay, yeah, I think it's really stuck now.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 I can't believe that didn't work!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 I know, me neither! I mean, you had a sketch!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Oh, y'know, what did you mean when you said pivot?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Hey!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Hey! How's it going? Did you make any new friends?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, I met this woman. 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	  Hey, whoa-whoa! What's she like?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Uhh, well, she'sreally good in bed.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Joey, I thought you were gonna try to be friends first!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Well look, hey, it's all your fault!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 What?! Why?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Well because you didn't give me advice! No! You gave me a pickup line! Assoon as I told her I wanted to y'know, build a foundation and be friends first. Isuddenly, through no fault of my own, became irresistible to her!  And herroommate!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 What about the closeness?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Closeness-shmoshness! There was three of us for crying out loud!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  All right! Hey, who wants pizza?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	 Ooh, I do! I do! I do!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	  Oh, great! Can you believe I found it on the second floor?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Monica	 Who is it?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Voice	 N.Y.P.D!!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe, Joey	 Oh my God!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Joey	 Uhh, just a minute officer!! 
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 I'm looking for Phoebe Buffay!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Ooh, God, it's him! It's that cop! God, I can't believe it! He found me!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Rachel	 Oh my God, Phoebe, are you gonna go to jail?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Well, if I'm going down, I'm taking you  with me. Harboring a fugitive? That's one to three years minimum. Good luckChandler.  Okay, you can arrest me. Fine. Butyou'll never make it stick and you know it!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Yeah, but I kinda don't have a choice, it's my job. I mean, you understandright?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yep! As long as you understand that I'm going to call my lawyer and oncehe puts you on the stand he'll make you look like a fool. A fool!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 I don't like looking foolish. Y'know what? Maybe uh, I don't arrest youtoday. Maybe I came by and you weren't here.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 I would love it if I weren't here!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Okay, so since umm, you're not going to jail tonight I was wondering if youwould like to go to dinner with me?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Me?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Yeah. Ever since you flashed my badge at me, I kinda can't stop thinkingabout you. You're the prettiest, fake undercover whore I've ever seen.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler, Joey	 Nice!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Wow! I didn't see that coming! You're-you're asking me out!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Yeah. I mean, I coulda done it better, but these people keep staring at me.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Umm, yeah, I'd like to go out with you officer
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Cop	 Gary.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Gary.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Gary	 Okay, so it's a date.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yeah! So--ooh, I gotta ask you though. How did you know where to findme?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Gary	 Well you're fingerprints were all over my badge so I just ran it throughthe computer and this was listed as your last known address so I just checked it out.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Ohh, impressive.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Gary	 Not as impressive as you. I gotta tell you, I looked at your record andyou've done some pretty weird stuff.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 Yeah, we'll talk at dinner.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Gary	 Okay.  So I'll come by in a couple hours and pick youup?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Phoebe	 All right, I can't wait!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Gary	 Okay. And don't worry, I'm not just gonna take you out for donuts.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Chandler	  He has a gun!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 I'd like to return this couch. I'm not satisfied with it.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Saleswoman	 You wanna return this couch?  It's cut in half!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 That's what I'm telling you.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Saleswoman	 Did you cut this couch in half?
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 This couch, is cut in half! I would like to exchange it for onethat is not cut in half!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Saleswoman	 You're telling me this couch was delivered to you like this?!
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	 Look, I am a reasonable man. I will accept store credit.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	The Saleswoman	 I'll give you store credit in the amount of four dollars.
05	16	0516	The One With The Cop	Ross	  I take it.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Good, you guys are all here!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Hey! What's up?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Well, I have a job interview at Ralph Lauren tomorrow!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	All	 Congratulations! Ohh, that's great!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 I know!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Boy, that guy's underwear sucks!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Wh-what?!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 I got this pair marked excess, I gotta tell ya, there was no room forexcess anything in there.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Anyway, I'm going to be the coordinator of the woman's collection, I'llwork right under the director, it's the perfect, perfect job for me!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Wow! Well, if you nail the interview, you'll get it!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 You wanna work on your interview skills?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 O-okay!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay! All right, let's start with the handshake. Hi.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Hi. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Very good handshake, good wrist action.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Let me try. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay.  Oh my God! What didI ever do to you?! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Did I squeeze it too hard?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Let's just say, I'm glad I'm not Chandler.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 That's right Ross, I can see you in your new apartment! And you can seeme! Same as yesterday,  same as the day before.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Is he doing his shark attack bit yet?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Nope. Op, wait! There he goes. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	  Very funny Ross! Very life-like and funny. Okay.  Oh no-no-no, I wasn't waving at you lady.  Whoa, maybe I was! Hey, Monica, this totally hot girl inRoss's building is flirting with me.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Get in there man! Flirt back, mix it up!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Yeah, I-I-I'm down with that.  Okay, heregoes.  How  you  a-doin'?   It worked! She's waving me over. Okay, I-I-I'll be right over. Let's see, she's on the third floor
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	  Wow! She is pretty, huh?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Tell me about it, huh?  Oh no-no-no,I'm not with her, she's just Monica!  Ewwuck! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Hey Joey! Great stuff huh?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 This is your place?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Of course it is. Yeah, come on in. Ooh-ooh, go by the window you canpretend to be surfing. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 But I counted, you're not supposed to live here! Oh man! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Ugh!!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 What happened?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 I ended up at Ross's place. Oh, I musta missed counted or something. Damn! She's not there anymore. Oh, l-l-look, Ross is doing his'Watching TV' bit. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 No Joey, I think he's just watchin' TV. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary'S Radio	 We've lost visual contact with the suspect.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 Okay, now I've really have to go!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 But it's just so unfair that our date has to get cut short just 'causesome guy shot at a store clerk.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 I know, but it's my job, sweethart!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, then maybe I can come too!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary'S Radio	 Suspect has just emerged naked from the sewer.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 All right, you go. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 Bye-bye.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 'Kay, bye!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh God!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 What?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh I just miss him so much!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Wow! For just a week you guys are really close, huh?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah, it's weird. I can't help it though he's so sweet, he's like thislittle puppy dog, y'know? But like a really tough one that shots bad guys. Ohh, I just lovebeginning parts of relationships, y'know?! You just like can't keep your hands off eachother.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 I know it is the best.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 So-so how long did that last for you and Chandler?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 What? It's still going on.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Come on, seriously! When did it end?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 I-I am serious, I mean, we're, we're all over each other all the time.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, you know where you are better than I do. I was just curious.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	   What don't youjust calm down Phoebe! All right?! Why dont you just get all your facts before yourun around telling everybody that you're the only hot couple!!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	  God, I woke the beast. Sorry.  I was wrongobviously, I justI misspoke. It's okay.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Oh no, it is okay, I mean as long as you know that Chandler and Iare also very hot and fiery, just as hot as you! I mean our flame, whew, is on fire!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	  Hey Monica, here's your broom back.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 You are so cute. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Oh hey, how'd the interview go?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Ugh, horrible! I did the stupidest, most embarrassing thing!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Did you tell the guy you wanted to have sex with his wife and then fallright out of your chair?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 No!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 So what happened?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Ugh, it was horrible! And-and the interview part went so well, y'know? Ieven made him laugh. He said something about a boat and I was like, "Well, yeah! Ifyou've got enough life jackets!"  Trust me, it was actually, it was very funny. Anyway, so we were saying good-byeand ugh!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 What happened?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  All right, wewere shaking hands and he kinda leaned toward me Y'know maybe he was going to openthe door, but I totally miss read him and I uhhh 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 You kissed him?!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Well, I didn't know what else to do!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Well you coulda tried, not kissing him.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Thanks Chandler.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	  Hey Rach, a guy from Ralph Laurencalled, you got a second interview!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 I can't believe it! I got a second interview!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Yes!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 I bet that kiss isn't looking like such a big mistake now, is it?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 What-what, wait a minute, you don't think that's why he wants me back?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Yeah!  No?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 A kiss? What are you talking about?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 I accidentally kissed him in the interview, and now he wants me backy'know of course, 'cause "Let's bring the girl back who kisses everybody!"
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Come on, Rach.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Oh my God! What if he thinks I'm the kind of girl that-that would justsleep with him?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 He probably wants you back because you're right for the job.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Maybe. I-I don't knowOh God, how could I be so stupid?!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Oh Rachel look, don't say that, I think you just need a hug from Joey.Come on. Come on.  She's back! Hot girl'sback!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Ohh, well I'm not totally back yet, but thank you.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 No, in Ross's building!  She's back! She's back!  Okay, wait there, I'll be over in a second. Got it! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 I gotta check out this hot girl!  There she is! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Damnit!! Did you move?!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Yes. I lived with you guys for a while and then I found this place.  I'm Ross.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Old Man	 Yes?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	  Uhh do you happen to have a hot girl in there?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Old Man	 No. I'm all alone.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Yeah. Sorry about that.  Oh, hey little girl. Uhh, is-is your mommy, or sister, orbabysitter by any chance a hot girl?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Little Girl	 Daddy!!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Later!  Oh man!  Hot girl! Hot girl!!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Hi Rachel!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Hi!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Come on in.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 It's really nice to see you again.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Thank you.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	  Oh Rachel,uhh 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 What?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Just ah 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Excuse me?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Here let me 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  Wh-whoa! All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's goingon here! Now listen, look-look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am notsome hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead! Now even though I , hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that doesnot give you the right to demand sex from me. I do not want, this job thatbad. Good day, sir. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  Ugh, you will not believe what that sleaze-ball from RalphLauren did too me!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Okay-okay that-that's amazing. How did you know that?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 You got ink on your lip.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Oh.  Ohhhhhhhhh.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	  So what do you say, maybe sometime I hold your gun?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 I don't know man, we're really not supposed to do that.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Oh, what can happen? I mean, would you 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 Yeah, I'm gonna say no.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Phoebe, do you want to go see a movie after dinner tonight?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh we can't, we already have plans.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 What are you doing?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Well, same thing we did all day, hang out at Gary's apartment. He is soamazing, we never left the bedroom. But have fun at the movie.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	  Oh, we're notseeing a movie!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 You're not? Then why did you ask us if we wanted to go?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Oh umm, that's because I just wanted to y'know walk in on me andChandler while we were, y'know, doing it all night. Will you excuse me for just a second?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Okay.  Chandler? Can I see youfor a second?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Uh, yeah.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Okay.  We have got to beatthem! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Why?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 'Cause, Gary and Phoebe think they're a hotter couple than we are!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Ohh, so?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 So! So we've got to go upstairs and have a lot of sex to prove themwrong!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Monica, you have got to stop this competitive thing! Okay? It'scrazy.  I mean, just impress Gary and Phoebe we have to goupstairs and have sex over and over and I'm saying no to this, why? Get your coat.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	  Hey!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Man	  Excuse me. You should check this out, tell the other tenants. Apparently he's running around lookingfor some kind of a hot girl.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	  Who isn't? 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 I don't, I don't think we've meet. I-I'm Ross.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Hot Girl	 I know. You're the guy who wouldn't chip in for the handyman.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Nevermind! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Hot Girl	 No, I-I actually thought it was unfair the way everyone reacted. Imean you had just moved in.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 I had just moved in. Thank you! Listen umm
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	The Hot Girl	 Jen.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Jen, I know this may sound a littleBut uh, would you maybe wanna grab a cup of coffee sometime, or
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Jen	 Sure! That would be nice.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Umm?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Jen	 Oh! My number is on there.  Give me a call.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 I will give you a call.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Jen	 I'll see you later. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Okay!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Jen	 I forgot my paper. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 That was amazing!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Phoebe and Gary are so gonna hear about this at dinner.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 That was amazing.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 We are the hottest! Huh? No one is hotter than we are! You're thebest.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 No, you're the best.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 No, you're the best.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 No, you're the best.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 I am the best.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	  Hey guys!  What 'cha been doin'?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	  Hey Joey! Isn't that the girl that waved at youthe other day?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 I don't know. But I can see through your sheet. Yeah, yeah, that's her. But y'know what? Doesn't matter, I'm never gonna get to meet heranyway.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Why?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Because it's impossible to find her apartment! She lives in some like ofhot girl parallel universe, or something.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 What are you talking about?  She obviouslylives on the second floor, seventh apartment from the left!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 No. No. No. She lives on the third floor, eighth apartmentfrom the left.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 No, those first two windows,  that's the lobby. And y'know theother one over there, that's the stairway. You've been counting wrong.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 I did not know that! Thank you Monica.  I can'tbelieve I almost lost another girl because of counting.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 So uhh, you ready?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Jen	 Sure, I'll just get my coat.  Could you getthat?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	 Sure. Joey
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Joey	 Dahhhhh!!  No! Noooo!! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Ah, first, I-I would like to say thank you for agreeing to see me again.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 That's quite all right, but I feel obligated to tell you that thismeeting is being videotaped.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  Okay. Umm, well, first I would like tostart by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Fair enough.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah,  who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a bigmistake and here's why. I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage.When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. That shows integrity.And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage.  Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know yougotta have courage. And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances inthe workplace, I said no and I was not litigious.  So there you go, you got, you got  courage, you got integrity, you got  courage again, andnot litigious. Look Mr
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Zelner.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Zelner! Right! I knew that! I really, really want this job and I think,I think I would be really good at it.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Y'know what? I may regret this but uh, I'm going to give you a shot.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  Oh! You are?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Um-hmm.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Really? Oh thank you! Oh Oh, would it be completely inappropriateto give you a hug?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Mr. Zelner	 Yes!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Okay, well then how about a handshake?  Oh God I'm sorry! Oh God, I'm sorry! I did not mean totouch thatI mean you there. There. Uhh, okay, so thank-thank you, I'm goingto leave now thank you very much uh-huh, thank you soHey! I'll see you Monday!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 You tired Chandler?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 You better believe he's tired, after the day we had! If you know what Imean. You know what I mean?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Honey, the tortilla chips know what you mean.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 So uh Chandler, you like that badge I got you?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Oh yeah, it's so cool.  Now I gotta go, Officer Bing has gotta, 10-100.  That's pee-pee.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Phoebe, you have a, a twig in your hair.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 Ohh,  umm, we kinda took a little detour on the way over here.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 Yeah, we took a little stroll in the park and no one was around, so
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 You didn't!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Phoebe	 We did! We violated Section 12 Paragraph 7 of the criminal code!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 The park huh? A public place.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Gary	 Uh-huh.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 I hear ya. Excuse me for just a second! 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Hi Chandler.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Monica! This is the Men's room!  Isn't it?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Yes it is. You see I've always found the men's bathroom very sexual.Haven't you?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 No. And if I did, I don't think we'd be going out. Monica, this isgetting ridiculous!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Come on, we can't let them win!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Ugh, we have already proved that we are hot! Okay? So why-why are yougetting so obsessed about this thing?!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Because Phoebe and Gary are inthat-can't-keep-their-hands-off-each-other-doing-it-in-the-park phase!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	  So?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 I feel really sad that we're notreally there anymore.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Oh wow! Is that what this all have been about?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Wasn't it a lot more exciting when we were y'know all over each otherall the time?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Yeah that was great. That was really great! But to tell you the truth,I'm more excited about where we are right now.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Really?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Yeah! I've never been in a relationship that's lasted this longbefore. Y'know to get past the beginning and still be around each other all the time, Ithink that's pretty incredible. And the fact that this is happening all with you, yeah Ithink that's pretty exciting. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 That is so sweet. I know that I was acting a little crazy but umm, Ifeel the same way.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Yeah?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Yeah. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Y'know what I just realized? You just freaked out about ourrelationship.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Did not.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Yes you did! Admit it! You freaked out!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Okay, I freaked out a little.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	 Little?! You freaked out big time! Okay? And I fixed it! We haveswitched places! I am the relationship and king and you are the crazy, irrationalscrew up!   And now we're back.
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	  I cannot believe Ross is buying this!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Monica	 Thank God! I can't watch him anymore!
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Chandler	  You guys ready fore the movies?
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah! Oh by the way, thank you for loaning us Pamela and Yasmine. 
05	17	0517	The One With Rachel's Inadvertant Kiss	Ross	  Man! They cannot get enough! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Okay, pick a card.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Okay. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 All right now, memorize it.  You got it?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Oh yes.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Is that your card? 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	  Yes. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	  Hey guys!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Hi!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Hi there!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ben	 Hi!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	 Guess what? Ben is going to be in a TV commercial!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 What are you talking about?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Well, it's not for sure but umm, we met this guy in thepark who thought Ben was really cute--y'know, which he is--so umm anyhoo, he uh, he gaveus his card and told us to bring him down for this commercial he's auditioning.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Whoa! This guy is like the biggest commercial castingdirector in town!  Ben takes one lousy walk in the park and gets an audition!! I mean, way to goBen!  Man! I've been in that park a milliontimes and no one offered me an audition.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 I know, it's crazy! We were just pushing Ben on the swings
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 I'm always on the swings! What am I doing wrong?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 That.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	  Okay, gotta go! Wish me luck!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Luck!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Hey Rach, now that you're working at Ralph Lauren, can youbring me back some of those polo shirts?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Uh well, y'know what? I don't think if I feel comfortable stealing on myvery first day
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Unwilling to steal from work, interesting.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Besides, if anybody's gonna get free stuff, it's gonna be me.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Okay guys, way to wish me luck!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	All	 Good luck! Go get 'em! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Okay, let's discuss Rachel's birthday. I say we throw a surprise partythis weekend.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, but her birthday isn't like for another month.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Yeah but if we throw her a party on her birthday, then it's not asurprise.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 I think it's a great idea. Yeah, we could have a dinner party and justinvite her close friends.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Ross!! We're having a surprise party for Rachel!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Okay!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Done.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Okay, great so do you want to do it together?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 I would love to do it together!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 They're gonna do it together.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Dude! That's my girlfriend!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 What, so I gotta shut it down now?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 All right, I gotta take off. I'm picking up Ben then we're off to the bigaudition.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 It's gonna be weird to watch some actor pretending to be Ben's dad.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Weirder than watching his two moms make out? 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Whoa-whoa dad? There's a dad in the commercial?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah the dad and Ben eat soup and pretend to enjoy it.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Whoa, hey, maybe I'll go down there with ya and see if I can get anaudition to play the dad. I mean who better to play Ben's father than his godfather.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 You're not his godfather.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 What?! Are you kidding?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Of course I am!  Okay, let's go godfather.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 All right!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hey! I'm in, they're gonna let me audition!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Really? That's great!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 I know! I know! It turns out that one of the casting ladies has actuallyseen me in a play, so I steered clear of her
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	  Hey,that kid looks familiar.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Oh yeah, yeah! He's done tons of commercials. I've seen him in like SugarSmacks, Playstation, and that one for the phone company. In fact he was so good inthat one, he actually convinced me to switch phone companies. Chandler was mad.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah well, he's not gonna get this one. Ben is way cuter than that kid. Imean look at him, look at you, 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 That's great. Listen, wouldn't it be great though if I got to play Ben'sdad?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Joey, you look nothing like Ben.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 I look more like him than you do! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	 Y'know, I don't really know you well enough for you to do that.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 So it's down to these two, Nancy I know you like this one and I think Iagree. Rachel, what do you think?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric  Sorry.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Oh don't be sorry, that's part of your job here to give your opinions andthen I take credit for them--I'm kidding.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 She is kidding, but don't ever disagree with her again. Okay, now I'mkidding!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	  Oh, what a fun office.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 I don't know which one, but I do know I need a cigarette. So what do yousay we take a break, we go outside, and we'll figure this out when we come back?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	  Rachel? Do you smoke?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh no, my dad's a doctor and he would always tell me just horrorstoriesabout ghosts and goblins whototally supported the princess's right to smoke.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 and then they came back from smoking and they had made all of thedecisions without me!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 That doesn't seem fair.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 I know! It's like I'm being punished for not having this disgusting,poisoning habit!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Yeah, it is the best.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 I mean what if this keeps happening? Y'know, they'll-they'll be outsidesmoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupidclean air, y'know? And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who doyou think she's gonna pick? Me or Smokey Smokerson?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Rachel, you can go down there, you don't have to smoke. Just say youwanna get some fresh air.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Yeah, I can do that.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Yeah, or you can do the easy thing and smoke.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Hey Rach, you wanna get some coffee?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 I would love to!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Oh good!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Yeah, I wanna go to babe.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Oh good.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Oh wait, I change my mind!  Okay, let'stalk about the party! I have so many ideas! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Yeah, me too! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Oh, look at that.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 All right, that's a little sketch of the cake, umm some sample menus,umm y'know what I thought we would start out with Tuscan style finger food, and for music,here's an alphabetized list of all my CDs! I've highlighted the ones that would go reallygood with the food.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 What happened to the intimate dinner party?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Oh, we're not doing that. Okay
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 So wow, it looks like you took care of everything. Thanks a lot,co-host.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 What?! I didn't take care of everything, there's-there's plenty ofthings for you to do!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Like what?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	  Cups.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Cups? You're giving me cups?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 And ice!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Cups and ice? Ooh, I get to be in charge of cups and ice?  All right. Fine, okay, I will be in charge of cups and ice!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Wait a minute, I can get ice at the restaurant
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 I got it! Mine!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Hi.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Hey! How'd the audition go?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Not so good.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Wait a minute, are you doing Joey's  "Audition didn't go sowell.  Yeah it did?"
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Yeah I am! Yeah, Ben got a second audition!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Yeah, I had to teach Ross my bit because I actuallydidn't get a callback.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 You got a callback too didn't you?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Yeah I did!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Hey Rachel, what are you doing out here?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh well, it's kinda lonely up there, so I just thought I would come outhere and get some fresh air.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Nancy and I were talking about the fall collection.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh great!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 So anyway we really Honey, we're just smoking all over you.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 Oh, sorry!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh that's okay.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 No-no-no, we'll move you just stay right there. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 So anyway I sent the designs over to Ralph and he's very excited aboutthe line.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Oh that's great! You are the best!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Excuse me, can I, can I bum one of those?  Y'knowwhat, actually  Okay, okay, okay, what's so funny over here?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 I thought you didn't smoke.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh, I thought you guys meant marijuana cigarettes, y'know? Y'know what Imean, like dubbies? And I actually, I thought to myself, "Wow, those guys arecrazy!" But no, I actually smoke the regular ones all, all the time.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 We get high.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh, me too.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 I'm kidding.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	  Oh, me too.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Oh God, this is so nerve wracking! How-how do you do this?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Well, unfortunately, I don't get many callbacks so
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	 Is it a good sign that they asked us to hang around after the audition?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Who knows?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	  Okay uh, we have narrowed it down to Raymond,Ben, Kyle, and Joey. The rest of you, thank you very much.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yes!! I knew it!!  Bye-bye! So long!Later!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Oh this is great! I might actually get to play Ben's dad!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Actually, that can't happen. Yeah because you all havesuch different looks, we're putting you with Raymond and Kyle with Ben. So it'll be eitheryou two  or you two.  
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Man, this is gonna be kinda weird.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah, it is.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kyle	 Yeah. It's gonna be weird.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 No, we-we're gonna be like best friends, that's why it's gonna be weird.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kyle	 Oh, oh, I thought we were just talking.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross, Chandler	 Hi!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Is it okay if I leave this stuff here 'til Rachel's birthday party?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Ah sure. What's in 'em?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Umm, cups.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Oh good, because uh we got Rachel 800 gallons of water.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Seriously that's a lot of cups.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Yeah well, that's 'cause Monica put me in charge of cups and ice, andMonica is gonna rue the day that she put me in charge of cups and ice.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Y'know I rued the day oncedidn't get a whole lot else done.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 Okay, time to bring up the rest of the cups.  Oh, hi Joey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hey Pheebs!  Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Ross good, I'm uh glad you're here. I wanna talk to you about something.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 What's up?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Well, I've been thinking about this whole commercial thing, y'know megoing up against Ben, the two of us competing, and that can't lead to anything good. So, Ithink I'm just gonna step aside. I'm gonna tell them that I won't audition.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Wow, uh, Joey that's-that's great. Thanks man.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 That's it? You're-you're gonna let me do this?! This-this is my careerwe're talking about here!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Well, you just
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 I just said that so you wouldn't let Ben do it! Look Ross, if anyoneshould step aside it should be Ben!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 What?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 What? Chandler! Tell 'em!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	  Well I mean, let me get the door first.  Oh, hi! No one. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Why should Ben step aside? It was his audition in the first place! You-youjust tagged along! You're like the uh, tag-a-long dad.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 At least I care about his feelings!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 What?!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Do you know how hard this is gonna be on him when he doesnt get it?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 And why wouldn't he get it?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Oh, come on! Have you seen what my kid can do?! Huh?! I mean hedials phones! He-he-he eats tortilla chips! He-he plays soccer with the cartoon tiger!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Are you saying your kid eats soup better than my kid?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 You just give him a spoon baby!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Oh yeah? I guess we'll just see!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Yeah! Because this commercial belongs to me and Mitch!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 You're kid's name is Raymond!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Yeah?! So's yours!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	  How did work go?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh it was great! It was great! I went down there just like you said,y'know? And we talked business. Kim totally took my opinions.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 You stink!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Thanks!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 No, I'm-I'm serious!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Well-well that's 'cause I went down there and they were all smoking.This is actually the smell of success.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Okay, there's something different though--Oh my God! You smoked!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 I did not!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Yes you did! You look happy and sick; you smoked!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 All right, fine! But I had too! I had to do it for my career!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 I wish I had smoked for my career
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 That's so gross!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? I mean yeah, my tongue feels alittle fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Okay, but you gotta push past this because it is about to get so good!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Chandler! I have to tell you, you smell so smokey I have to get up. I'mnot kidding. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 I think you smell great! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 So, we're decided, no on plaid, yes on pink?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 Absolutely!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 I am so on board! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Rachel didn't you just light that?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Yeah, I did, but y'know what? I am really, really trying to cut back,y'know?  Good luck, Rach.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 I've actually been thinking about quitting lately.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Oh sure, every Sunday night I'm telling myself I'm quitting but everyMonday morning it's like 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 Tell me about it!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Well then let's just quit! We'll just quit! Let's all quit!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 It does sound appealing.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 Oh, I never could do it.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh but you could. You can. Absolutely! We can help each other out! Wecan get--what are those--those patches! We could be like the Patch Sisters!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Oh y'know, we really should quit. Okay, let's quit!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Yes! Great! Give me those cigs! Give it! Give it! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 My late husband gave me that lighter.  I'm not kidding.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Okay then! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hmmm, soup!  Hmm soup!  Hmm, soup!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	 Joey, Ross is gonna be here any second, would you mind watching Ben forme while I use the ladies' room?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Oh yeah, no problem.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Carol	 Thanks. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Hi Ben! So you wanna be an actor huh? I gotta tell ya,it's no picnic. There's tons of rejection. No stability. One day you're Dr. DrakeRemoray, the next day you're eating ketchup right out of the bottle.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Joey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	  Ross!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  Ben!   I mean, Ben! Ben!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	  Okay, Raymond, Joey you're up.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hi!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Okay, uh well, let's try one. Whenever you guys are ready.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Uh-oh.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Is there a problem?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Well this is noodle soup and uh, I've been working with tomato. But that'sokay, no problem. No problem. Hmm, noodle soup.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Y'know, that's-that's fine, but the line is, "Hmm,soup."
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Oh, what did I say?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Hmm, noodle soup.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 How's that different?  Oh! Yeah!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 All right, let's try one.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hmm, noodle soup.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Okay. Let's do it again.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Okay.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hmm, soup.  I mean, noodle soup. I mean soup!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Raymond	 COME ON!!!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	The Casting Director	 Y'know what? We need to move on.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 No! No! I-I can do it one more time! See? Look! Hmm, noodle soup. Damnit! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Hey! Hey-hey-hey!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Uh-oh, busted!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Come on you guys! What are doing?! I thought we were the patch sisters!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Yeah. That didn't work out.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Nancy	 Rachel we tried to quit, but it was too hard!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Well y'know if you, if you started smoking again you could've at leasttold me! Come on, give me one of those! What are we talking about?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 No. No! You're doing great! Dont you give up! That's why we didn'ttell you and we're not gonna drag you down with us.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh wait, no-no-no! Drag me down. Drag-drag me down.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Forget it Rachel! We're both so proud of how well you're doing. I'm notgonna let you blow it. In fact, if I catch you with a cigarette, you're fired. So go on,get out of here! Go on, I don't want you breathing this stuff! Go on!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Okay. 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	  So, okay! So you'll come with me on the Paris trip.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	  Oh man!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	  Check it out! Cup hat!  Cup banner!Cup chandelier! And the thing that started it all, the cup! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Great job with the cups, Pheebs!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	  Why don't you just go out with her!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	  And did you notice the ice?  Look! We have it all! We have crushed! Cubed! And dry! Watch!  Ahhh! Mystical!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Awesome!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Chandler! Everyone--no one's eating my Tuscan finger food 'cause they'reall filling up on Phoebe's snow cones!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 There are snow cones!  Snow cones! Yuck!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 Y'knowgo! Go! Right there! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Thank you! Thank you! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	  Oh, look! Look! Look!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	All	 Surprise!!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 What?! What?! My birthday's not for another month!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Monica	 That's the surprise!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh my God! You guys this is so great! I mean it's so unexpected! I meanChandler's birthday is even before mine!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	All	 Surprise!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Wow! This is great! Look at all these cups! This is so weird.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Phoebe	 I was in charge of cups.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Rachel	 Oh, okay, not so weird.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Hey!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Hey.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Listen man, uh, I'm sorry the audition didn't go so well.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Yeah right! 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 No really, I-I am! I feel bad!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Yeah? Well look Ross, you don't have to. Okay? It's not your fault I suck.I mean what kind of an actor can't even say, "Hmm, noodle soup." 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 Yeah y'know what? Maybe-maybe you didn't mess up your audition because yousuck, maybe you messed up because you care more about uh, your godson.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 What you do mean?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 I think, sub-consciously
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Wait-whoa-whoa, you lost me.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	  I think on some level, you-you sabotaged your own audition so thatBen would get the part.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Well, you're way sounds a lot better than mine.  Yeah.Yeah! It's not that I'm a bad actor
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 No!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 No, it's just ah, I care so damn much about little Ben that uh, it wasmore important to see him succeed.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 There you go. Thank you!
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Thank you! So, did-did he get it?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Ross	 No.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Joey	 Eh, what are you gonna do?
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	  Oh, hi! Excuse me, is uh Rachel Green here? I wassupposed to meet her for lunch.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	 Oh, she doesn't come down here any more. You can find her up on ten.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 Okay, great.
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Kim	  So we talked about the whole presentation yesterday at lunch  and he wondered if one person would beenough  to get a take on the trip  and I said, "Yeah,absolutely!" 
05	18	0518	The One Where Rachel Smokes	Chandler	 I'll catch you guys later. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Hey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Hey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Wow! You look nice. What's the occasion?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Monica and I are celebrating our ten-month anniversary, we've gotreservations at Ja George.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Wow! How'd you get in there?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Made a few calls, pulled some strings, and they agreed to seat us at11:30 if we both had the chicken and didn't get desert. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Delivery Girl	 Hi Chandler!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Hey Caitlin! Somebody got a haircut.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Ugh, I hate it! I look like an 8-year-old boy.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Yeah, if that was true, gym class would've been a lot moreinteresting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 It's uh, 27 dollars even.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Oh, okay.  Here you go. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Hey, where's the chicken?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Oh, he's in the back. The duck pissed him off, said that eggs camefirst.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	  Great. I'll see you later!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay, bye!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 What the hell was that?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 What?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 The flirting! Aren't you supposed to be going out with, I don't know hmm,let's say my sister?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 I was not flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 It was totally flirting. "Somebody got a haircut "
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay first of all, the impression, uncanny. And second, that was notflirting, that was just casual conversation between two people. That is all.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Yeah, right.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 You wanna see flirting? I'll show you flirting. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  I'm good.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 I am so proud of Joey, I can't believe he's going to be on Law &Order!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I know. But don't you think that it should be called Order and Law?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 No because first they arrest the guy and then they try him.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Don't get me started on that.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 I was not flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 And on your anniversary, for shame!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 What's going on?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Chandler was hitting on the hot delivery girl!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 I was not and oh God, shh!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Well I'm sorry but you were! Okay? And besides if anyone should be hittingon her it's the guy who's single, the guy that who-who-who can do something about it.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Sounds like somebody wants to be Mr. Pizza Delivery Girl.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Well
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Is that what this is about? You like Caitlin?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Ross! We broke up two years ago; you've been married since then.I think it's okay that we see other people.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Well, I-I was watching her the other day at the pizza place.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Hm-mmm.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 And she's just so sexy and funny and has the cutest little
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what? We don't need her measurements. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  Okay pepperoni, pepperoni, pepperoni, okayRoss, I know she's pretty and you love her, but is she stupid?! She forgot my vegetarian!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 This is perfect! She'll have to come back here with your pizza, and whenshe does, I'll turn on the Charm-O-Ross. Oh I'm so glad you don't eat meat.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 See? Vegetarianism benefits everyone.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Hey everybody, look who's here! Youremember my grandmother!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Big night!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 This is so cool!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 So, Joey on Law & Order, you must be very proud!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Chandler, she doesn't understand a word of English.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 I'm sorry, I thought you were Joey's other grandmother.  I've done it again.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 She's my biggest fan. Yeah, she's the only one in the family that'sbelieved in me. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Yeah, I uh weighted like 27 pounds when I was born so
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  Hey! Happy Anniversary!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Happy Anniversary, 10 months! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 So umm, when I was in the shower I was thinking about our first night inLondon
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Uhh, Joey's grandmother is right there. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Is that the one that speaks English or the one that doesn't?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 The one that doesn't.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 That was some hot love you gave me! I'm gonna go get ready.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Hey, why don't you wear those earrings I gave you?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 That's a great idea! I was saving them for something special.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  You have got to go home!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 But I like it here!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 You gotta go home and get the earrings that you borrowed from me okay?Chandler wants me to wear them tonight.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Okay, well I think that they're in my purse. Why don't you go getdressed and I'll look for them.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Great!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Okay!  Rach, hi, I need those earrings youborrowed.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh, umm, okay, yeah, I'll be, yeah I'll be right back. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Wow Pheebs, you speak Italian?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I guess so. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	  Here you go. Thank you!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Wait, Rach! Where's the other one?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh what, you-you want both of them?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Rachel Karen Green, where's the other earring?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay, okay, okay, look, just don't freak out, but I kinda lost it. Iknow it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Well, what am I going to tell Monica? She wants to wear them tonight!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Tell her to wear her own earrings.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 These are her earrings.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Nooo! Nooooo! You lent me Monica's earrings?! I'm not allowed to borrowher stuff!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Why not?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Because I lose her stuff!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Okay, see that blind guy right there? I'm gonna bash his head in later.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Oh umm, my big scene is coming up. Big scene coming up.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 If you said, "Big lima bean, bubbling up." Would sheunderstand the difference?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  Rach? What are you doing?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh boy, I just can't watch. It's too scary!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 It's a diaper commercial.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh yeah well, you know me, babies, responsibilities, ahhh!!!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Pizza delivery!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 I'll get it! I will get that! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Hi!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Hi!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 One uh, vegetarian pizza. That's $12.15.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Oh. Uh, by the way, if it makes you feel any better. I happen to like8-year-old boys.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 What?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  The uh, your hair, before, your hair, you said youthought your looks like an 8-year-old's, and I'm just saying I like it. The hair.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Oh. Thanks.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 You understand I don't actually like 8-year-old boys.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Y'know, all I'm looking for is the money.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Here you go.  Now stop bringing us pizzas you.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 I'm gonna try. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 You're welcome.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 You couldn't let me have her, could ya?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 What?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 This is a girl that I really like and had too swoop in there!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 What's goin' on?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Chandler was totally flirting with the hot delivery girl!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Thank you for that!  I was not flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 It's okay. I don't care. It's uh, it's fine.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Really?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Really?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 It's no big deal, I do it all the time.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  So umm, you-you flirt withguys all the time?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Sure! It doesn't mean anything! Just like I know it doesn't meananything with you!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay, but there is a big difference. You are a lot hotter thanI am.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  True story! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Chandler, this actually bothers you?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Yes, it does bother me! And I think it would bother a lot of people.Rachel, when you were going out with Ross, did it bother you when he flirted with otherwomen?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Uhh, no, no, it bothered me when he slept with other women.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 And thank you, for that.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. Ross was neververy good at the flirting thing.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 What?  What-what, what are talking about? It-it worked with you.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh! Y'know what? You're right! We meet, you flirted and then bamnnine years later you had me!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 All right, all right. You-you-you know what I'm going to do? I am going toorder another pizza and when Caitlin gets here, you-you--I will show how well I flirt.Yeah! I will, I will get her phone number!  And not the one on the menu!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  I found it!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Ohh! Thank God! Where was it?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 On your dresser.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay that is the one we already have!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Okay, here's my big scene. My big scene's here!  Oh my God.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 What?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Okay, everybody just keep smiling. It'll kill my grandmother ifshe finds out.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  Well, what is it?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Oh, they cut me out of the show.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	  What?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Are you sure?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  Maybe your scene's coming up?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Not likely.  'Cause you see that body bag right there
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	  Yeah.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  I'm in it.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  This is terrible, what are you going to do?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  I don't know. This little, old lady lives for my career. Whenthey dumped me off of Days of Our Lives she almost died.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  That's not good.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  No, smile! Not that face, smile! Everybody smile! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	  Joey, why don't you just tell her what happened? It's not yourfault.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  If we keep talking this way, aren't we gonna freak her outsoon?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Soon, soon, I'm gonna be on soon. There I am! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	  No! Sam Waterston!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 No-no-no, that-that's me, that's me.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 No, it's Sam Waterston! Crimes and Misdemeanors,Capricorn One.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Doesn't know, "Hello." But she knows Capricorn One.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  Phoebe! I have to have those earrings, we're going toleave as soon as the show is over.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 But I already gave them back to you!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 No you didn't.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 All right, I already didn't give them back to you, that's what I said. Where is that other earring?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler'slast night! Okay! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Make sure you check Chandler's jewelry box.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Wait a minute. Chandler has a jewelry box?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Okay, we have like ten minutes. Do you want me to get into that now?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Hey Pheebs! How's that uh, vegetarian pizza working out forya? You and those vegetables have a real thing going on, huh?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  Why are you being weird?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Do you like it?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 No, that would be, "Why are you being cute?"
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Okay, I'm working on my flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Ohh! I did not get that.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 So uh Monica, do you, do you like the Law & Order?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Yeah, it's good.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 See, I'm finding out all this stuff about you today, like you like theLaw & Order and that you flirted with every guy in the Tri-State area!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Chandler!  Okay, let me get this straight, it's okay for you to flirt, but not for me.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Oh, I'm so glad we cleared that up. Look, I'm sorry, some things aredifferent for men and for women.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Go on, teach me something about men and women.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay, I've already taught you so much already, but whatever. See whenyou flirt with a guy you think, "I'm just flirting, no big deal." But the guy isthinking, "Finally! Somebody who wants to sleep with me!"
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 No way!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 It's true.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Well that's pathetic!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Again true.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 And this goes for all guys?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 All guys that are awake. Then we go to sleep and then all the guysfrom the other end of the world wake up and behave the exact same way.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  All right, it's another commercial; I stillhaven't told her!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Joey! This is like the last commercial. You've got like ten minutes left!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 I know, I know! What am I going to do?  Ooh!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 No! You are not gonna run out and leave her here!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Yeah, all right.  Ooh! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 Joey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Uh, Joey is gonna be right back. Right back!  Meanwhile, let's-let's-let's talk about you.  So, you're old and small.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	    Hey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Did you find it?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 The earring? No. But look, I found my sunglasses under the couch! I'vebeen looking for these since like last summer. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Okay, those are my sunglasses, you borrowed them from me.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay, calm down, here they are. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  Phoebe! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  What are we going to do?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 I don't know, I don't know.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 All right well, we're just gonna have to tell Monica, that's all.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Oh gosh, she's going to kill me.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I suppose I could tell her it's just all my fault.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Ohh that'd be great!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Mon, can I talk to you for a sec?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Yeah, what is it?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Umm, I lost one of your earrings. I'm sorry! I am so, so sorry!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  Wow! All right well, I mean, what can you do? If you lost ityou lost it.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I will replace it, I promise. I feel so terrible.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 All right, sweetie that's fine. You didn't do it on purpose.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 No. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Look at you! Come here!  Feel better?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Yeah! You're the best!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute, I-I-I, I can't do this. Listenhoney, this is, it's not Phoebe's fault. She lent me the earrings, and I lost it.I'm so sorry. Honey, I feel terrible too. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	  That is exactly why I do not lend you stuff!!  Okay?! I mean, first it's my jewelry! And if it'snot my jewelry, it's-it's my blue sweater! And if it's not my sweater, it's my sunglasses!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Your sunglasses?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Yes!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Oh, right! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	  Pizza!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Oh, mine! Mine! Mine!  Okay, here goes.Prepare yourselves for some Class A flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Okay, hold on.  Okay. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Honey, you have nothing to prove. And if you really like this girl, Idon't flirting is the right thing to 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 You'll see. Okay.  Oh, what's-what's her name?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	All	 Caitlin!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 Caitlin!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Hey! Oh, we-we can't keep eatinglike this. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 It's uh, $12.50.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Okay,  so, do you make the pizzas in one of those uh,wood-burning ovens?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 No actually umm, I think that they're umm, gas.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Gas? Wow! Intense.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  If this is the way all the Gellers flirt, we don't have aproblem.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Hey uh, y'know that smell gas has?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	  Yeah.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 They put that in.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 What?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 The gas is odorless, but they add the smell so you know when there's aleak.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	  Well okay!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 A lot of other gas smells
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Oh the humanity.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Meth-methane smells
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Y'know what umm, actually I, I really, I should go.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Oh but I-I-I haven't paid you yet!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Y'know what? That's okay, you guys have ordered so many that this oneis on me! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  Was I talking to her about gas?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 More so than anything else.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I-I-I found it interesting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 I'm sorry.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Look, no-no, hey, hey, don't worry about it! In nine years, she and I willbe right there. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Okay, well, I'm gonna clear out some of these boxes. 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	  Ross?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Yeah?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 What else do they add smell too?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Hey! Hey!  Hi! Hey-hey-hey, I'm Rachel! From upstairs?The ones with all the pizza?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Oh, is there a problem?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 No. No. Every thing's--they're fine. Great pizza. But it's uh, actuallyumm my friend Ross. He uh, just gets really nervous when he's flirting.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Oh my God! That was flirting?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Wow!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 I know, I know, but uh just, I'm telling you, once, once you get pastthat part, that where it-it just feels like you wanna die, he's-he's really a good person.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 The guy with the gas?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Yeah. I'm-I'm telling you he's really sweet and he's really funny andhe's just ugh, got a good heart. And besides, I y'know, I think he really likes you.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 Really?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Well y'know, we have 7 people and like 10 pizzas, what do you think?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Caitlin	 I just, I thought Joey was there.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	  Hey Ross? Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-anduh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 What do you mean?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Well, I don't get it, but she wanted me to give you her phone number.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 And she just gave you this?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Rach, thanks but uh, I don't need you doing me any favors.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 I-I-I didn't! I didn't! She thought you were cute.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Well that I can believe.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Rachel	 Yay!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Hey! Is the show still on?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Almost over man.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Look! Oh!  Is that thePope?! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Why am I looking?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 Oh, here I am, here's my big scene!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  All right back off! I gotta gun! I'm not afraid to use it!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 Oh Joey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	 That's right!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 You couldn't have at least changed your shirt.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  Now, I wanna a suitcase filled with 100,000 dollars.  Choo! Choo! Choo!  Filled with $100,000in small bills, and if I don't get it Choo!! And if I don'tget it,  I'm gonna shoot this duck!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Oh no!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  I'm comin' out! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	  And she's supposed to buy this?!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Grandma Tribbiani	 Joey, bravo! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  Ground control to Major Tom! Commencingcountdownengineson!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Joey	  That's uh, scenes from next week's show. Next week's!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 I am definitely gonna watch that!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 What about these? These look the same?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Definitely!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Not as each other! 
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Phoebe	 Oh, then no.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  Hey!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Hi!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 You ready?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Yeah.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 You look amazing. I'm the luckiest man in the world.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Ohh, you're about to get a little luckier.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	 Let me see the earrings.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 Oh, honey, the earrings
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  They look great! Does your boyfriend have the besttaste or what?
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Monica	 My boyfriend really does have good taste!
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Chandler	  Thanks for picking out the earrings man.
05	19	0519	The One Where Ross Can't Flirt	Ross	 Hm-mmm.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Okay, guys, listen, don't forget that tomorrow is the day that Emilygets married again, so whatever we do, just try to really keep Ross's mind off of it.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Oh, yeah, good idea.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Hey man, what's up?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  Oh, eh, just thinking about Emily getting marriedtomorrow.  
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Ooh, Ross, look! Look! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  What? Where?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Right over there! Right there! Look-look-look!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 What am I looking at?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	  Somebody help me out here!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hello!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Hey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 How are you?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Monica, I'm sorry I didn't come by last night. I was out with Gary; helet me ride around with him in his cop car. We saw and prevented crimes.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 You got to go on a ride along?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Uh-huh!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 I want to go on a ride along!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Me too!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Okay!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah! Me too!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Really?! You?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Yeah.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Well, it's kinda dangerous.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Well, I like danger.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Okay, you guys free tonight?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey, Ross	 Yeah!!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Tonight? You-you didn't say it was going to be at nighttime.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Hey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Hey! Oh, I'm so glad you're home, I thought tonight we could finallyorganize these photos!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ohh, thank God! Finally!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Okay, I've broken them down into categories. Okay, we have uh, we gotholidays, birthdays, candids, y'know And then what I've done is I'vecross-referenced them by subject. Right? So if you're looking up, oh let's say birthdaysand dogs, you get Photo 152. See? 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ohh, it's me and La Poo! Wow! I miss that dog.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 You can also find him under umm, dog and dead.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Great! Thanks!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 All right, hand me that other box of photos; that's the very last one.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Oops. Sorry! Well, good thing you number all of them, huh?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 I hadn't! Photo 152 was a prototype. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ohhhh. Honey, honey, honey, it's okay, it's okay honey. I'm gonna fixyou a drink, huh? Maybe a margarita?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Ross has the blender! Ugh, everything's just falling apart!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 No honey, it's okay! Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, youget all the margarita stuff ready.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 All right, he's keys are in the drawer. Y'know what? I also need somecash.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay, you want me to stop at the ATM?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Nah, while you're at Ross's if you see any lying around
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 What?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 What?! I-I-I don't, I don't do that! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  That was so cool man, the way you leaned on that guy.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 It is starting to get dark out there.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  He told you everything! I mean you totally cracked him!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Yeah well, being that he was the victim, they're usually pretty talkative.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  Okay.  But it is officially nighttime.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Oh hey, Gary, want me to grab the berry for ya?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 It's called the cherry.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 It's theChandler!!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	  Okay, I got it! This place makes the best sandwichin the world!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hey Joe does it have meatballs on it?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Oh-ho, yeah!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Does it have melted cheese and marinara sauce?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yep!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Yeah, you can't eat that in my car.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	  Yeah okay.  Even though my tax dollars paid forthis car.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Your tax dollars?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah, okay.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  Wow! That sandwichreally does smell good.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Did I say you could smell it?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 I can't smell your sandwich?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Half the taste is in the smell! You-you're sucking up all the tastiness!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Okay, I'll give them back.  Look! What is so great about that sandwich?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Okay, imagine the best sex you've ever had.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Okay.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Are you thinking about Monica?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Yeah.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah, what's that like?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ohh please don't be from a real dinosaur! Please! Please! Please!Please! Please! Please! Please! Please!  Made in Mexico! Yes!! Ugh, who would buy this?! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	  Rach! It's me! Pick up!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Hey! What's up?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 I need a few more things to make the margaritas. Uhh, I need some salt,some margarita mix, and tequila.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 So all we have is ice?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 See if he has ice.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Emily	  Hello Ross? It's Emily.  I know this is out of the blue but uh, I'm getting marriedtomorrow. Well, maybe I am. I keep thinking about you and I'm wondering if-if we made amistake giving up so fast. Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not, but if youare, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Oh. Oh! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 So where are we going next?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 This witness won't return my calls so we're gonna see if we can surprisehim coming home.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Sur-surprise him? We're not, we're not gonna make anybody mad are we?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Come on man!  Listen so uh, are you gonna squeeze the perps shoesa little bit before he lawyers up?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 It's a witness not a perp. And no one talks like that!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Yeah, no one talks like that!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Oh what? Like your Mr. Cop!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Hey, I'm more cop than you two!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 How do you figure that?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Hello! I'm in the front seat, okay? I'm Gary's partner!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Y'know, when you say partner it doesn't sound cop. It, it sounds gay.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Umm, jealous! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hey, do you mind? We're under cover here.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Yeah, no problem. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Ross!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Sorry! Sorry! Oh,  there!  Hey Gary, who am I? Phone home!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Look at Officer Ross riding back here with the visitors.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah, what's up with that Serpico?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Emily	  Are you thinking about me? Of course you're not,but if you are, call me tonight. Okay, bye.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	  Nooo!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	  I know!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Well thank God you were here! I mean, we have to erase that!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 What?! We can't do that!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 We have too! I mean what if Ross's hears that and then calls her backand then they get back together? Is that what you want? Ross back with that controlling,neurotic, crazy Emily? The Emily that wouldn't let him see you?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Noo! Oh no! No! God no! He should not get back together with her. I knowthat! You know that! Even Ross knows that! But that still doesnt give us the rightto erase his message!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 I'm his sister, okay? I love him! I don't want to see him get hurt! Comeon! Doesnt that give me the right to control himhelp him?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 I don't think he's the one who needs help.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 No, look, she's obviously unstable, okay? I mean she's thinking aboutrunning out on her wedding day.   Okay, fine! But I mean, look at the position she's putting him in! What'she gonna do? Ross is gonna run over there on the wedding day and break up the marriage?! Imean, who would do that?!  Okay, fine,all right, but that's y'know, it's different! Although it did involve a lot of the samepeople.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ugh!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Y'know what, this is obviously some kind of twisted joke she's trying toplay on him.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay, you are crazy! I'm sorry, but she sounded generally upset!I mean, listen! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Answering Machine	 Your messages have been erased.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Noooooooo!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Okay, y'know, we-we're safe right? I mean nothing bad can go down!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 No. But that reminds me,  sign this.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 What is it?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Oh it's nothing, it just says that you can't sue the city if you scrapyour knee or y'know, get your head blown off.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  Oh, hurry up. I want to sign that.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Okay, here he comes. What is he doing? What the hell is he doing?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 What? What? What? What is it?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Is everything okay?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 What's going on?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Okay, he sees us. Now don't move. Don't look at him.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hey, it's okay. It was just a car backfire.  Hey, look at that! You tried to save your buddy. You see that? You see what he did?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	  You okay man?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Uh-huh. Thank Joey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Uh, HELLO!!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Hi.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 All right, I guess we should go.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 No, wait. Wait.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Oh yeah right! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 No, Monica! Monica! We have to fix this!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 There's nothing we can do. You erased the message!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Yeah well unless we tell him.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Well, if you're gonna be totally rational about this, I can't argue withyou! All right? Fine, if you wanna tell him, tell him. I just don't want to be a part ofit.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Oh, maybe that's Emily calling back to leave the exact same message.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  Hey Ross! It's you! I just want you to remember thisfeeling. You are lucky to be alive! So live everyday to the fullest. Love yourself, okay?Okay. Oh, and also get stamps. Bye! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Wow! Play that message for Emily and this whole problem goes away!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Right?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hey, anybody want to meet a hero?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	  John Glenn is here?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 No, Joey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Pheebs, we had the most incredible night! Okay, so, we're in thecar
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Wait! Hold on!  Hi!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Hi!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	  Okay, go ahead.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Okay, okay, so we're in the car. Right? And bang! A shot was fired.And Joey with no regard for his own safety throws himself on me!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 My God, Joey!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  It was a car backfire!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Yeah, but-but he didn't know that!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah, I didn't know that.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 And it could've just as easily have been a bullet.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Hey Joe, you ever think about joining the force? We could use a guy likeyou.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Who jumps at loud noises!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Wow! I could've died tonight.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Yeah! If the car that backfired had run over you! Y'know what, I thinkI'll go home before Ross starts rambling about his newfound respect for life. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 I do have a newfound respect for life.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  Oh my God! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	  So you wanna get some dinner?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Yeah! Sure! Yep!  Oh, y'know what? If I heard a shot right now,I'd throw my body on you.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 Oh yeah? Well maybe you and I should take a walk through a badneighborhood.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Okay!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Gary	 All right.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Bye!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross, Joey	 Bye!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Cut it out Ross! I hate to have to save your life and kick your ass in thesame day!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Dude! How come you took off? 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Oh, I just went for a walk, around the living room. Whatever
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Is something wrong?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 No. No I'm just tired. Y'know, from-from the walk.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Okay.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 You dove in front of Ross! Ross!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 That's what this is about! Oh my God, you hate Ross!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 I do not hate Ross!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Of course you do! I saved him! You're mad at me! It all adds up! You wantRoss out of the picture.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 What picture?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 I don't know, but I don't like what I'm hearing!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Look I'm very glad that you saved Ross from the car backfire, buty'know, it could've been a bullet and you y'know, you didn't try to save me!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Ohh, you're upset because you think I chose Ross over you! No!Iknewyou could take care of yourself. Y'know, I mean Ross, he need help. He'snot street like us!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 When it comes down to it, you would risk your life for Ross before youwould for me. That's the bottom line.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Well, no, not exactly! All right, look, I, I wasn't trying to save Ross.Okay? My sandwich was next to Ross. All right? I was, I was trying to save my sandwich.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 From a bullet!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 I know it doesn't make much sense
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Much sense?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Look Chandler, it was instinct! Okay? I just went for it!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 So you risked your life, for a sandwich!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 I know it sounds crazy, but Chandler this is  the greatest sandwich in the world!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 So you didn't uh, choose Ross before me.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 No! I would never do that! You-you're like my brother!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Really?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah! In fact, to prove how much you mean to me,  here.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Thanks. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 No, eh, oh-oi, easy, it's not a hot dog!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 How good is that?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	  Oh-oi-ho, yeah!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 See?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Hm-hmm. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Oh-whoa-hey, dude, what are you doing?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 I thought you were showing me how much you mean to me.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah. With a bite!  Gee-e-e-eez!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Hey! Hi!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Rach, what uh, what are you doing here?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Hey! Y'know what? You are in our apartment all the time! Okay?This is, this is just a drop in the bucket mister!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Y'know, it-it doesn't matter. The important thing is that you're here.You're my friend, and you're here. Oh! 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay, just a little scared. What's going on Ross?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 The most amazing thing happened tonight. I thought my number was up. I hadan actual near death experience!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 What?! What? What happened?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Okay, okay, we were on the ride along with Gary, right? 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Yeah!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 And somebody took a shot at me!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	  Really?!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 No, a car backfired, but  I thought somebodywas taking a shot at me. And Rach, II survived! And I was filled with this-thisgreat respect for life. Y'know? I-I want to experience every moment. I want to seize everyopportunity. I-I am seeing everything so-so clearly now.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Because a car backfired?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  Okay, why are you here?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Well, I-I-I don't know how this fits into your whole "seizing"thing but um, Emily called you today.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 You talked to her?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 No, she left a message.   Butit-it kinda got erased. There's just  something wrong with your machine.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Well, okay, what-what did she say?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Well, uh something about having second thoughts about the wedding anddid you guys make a mistake breaking up and uh, she wants you to call her.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Wow!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Now, that-that was a good thing that I told you, right?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Huh? Yeah! Yes, of course!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay. Thank you! Thank you! BecauseI'm sorry, all right. Becausey'know what? She didn't want menot important. The point is, I was right. Yourdecision. Okay? I was right.   Your decision.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Right. I guess, I guess I should call Emily.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay, no, that's not the right decision. That's not, that's not right,no Ross-Ross, come on! I mean, that woman made you miserable! Okay, Ross, do you reallywant to get back into that?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Okay, look, yesterday I would've even considered calling her back, but myex-wife calls on the same day I have a near death experience. I mean, that-that has got tomean something!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ugh, Ross! That was not a near death experience! That was barelyan experience!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 You weren't there! Okay, maybe this is something that I-I'm supposed toseize! Y'know?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what? Maybe, this is not about seizing stuff. Maybe this isabout escaping stuff.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Huh.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 I mean, look-look today you escaped   death,y'know? And maybe this is a chance for you to escape getting back together withEmily?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 That does make sense. Because I do wanna seize some opportunity, but I-Ireally don't wanna see or talk to her.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Well, there you go!
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Yeah. Maybe today is just, close call day.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	  Close call day.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Hey, thanks Rach. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Ohh, honey no problem. Okay. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Oh wait-wait-wait! The message is blinking. Maybe you didn't erase it. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Oh?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  "Hey Ross, it's you!"  Ohyeah, no that's-that's an old message, nobody needs to hear that.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 No. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	  Hey umm, was-was Monicahere?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Yeah, I want my money back.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Rachel	  Yeah, uh you-you probably need that for stamps,right?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, has Gary ever been shot at for real?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Yes. Once. Yeah, a little. He kinda did it to himself. It's not really agood story.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 I wonder how I would react under fire, y'know? And not backfire but-butheavy fire, like I was in a war or something.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Monica	 Man, I would be great in a war! I mean, I really, I think I would make afantastic military leader. I mean I know I would make General way before any of youguys.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Before or after you were shot by your own troops?
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Ross	 I know where Joey would be. He would be down in the foxhole protecting allof us.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Chandler	 Yes, if the foxhole was lined with sandwiches.
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Joey	 Yeah, hero sandwiches. 
05	20	0520	The One With The Ride Along	Phoebe	 Well you all know that I'm a pacifist so I'm not interested in war inany way.  But y'know what? When the revolution comes, I will have to destroy youall.   Not you Joey.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Would you like some more coffee, baby-doll?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I'm fine, thanks.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	  Yeah, see, I can't pull of baby-doll can I?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 No. I think we learned that from the sugarlips incident. I'm gonna getsome tea.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Okay.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Hiya doin' pumpkin?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Nope. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 So it looks like it's going really well for you two, huh?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 I know, really well. In fact, I'm gonna ask Phoebe to move in with me.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  Oh my God!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 What do you, what do you think?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 I think that is so great! When are you gonna ask her?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Tonight, but don't say anything. Okay?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 I swear, I promise. I promise. Oh my God, I'm so excited!  All right, listen let me tell you, do not get her flowers.Okay? Because y'know, she cries when they die, and there's the whole funeral
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  I'll see you after work sweetie. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Okay. Bye! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 So, what movie should we see?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  Gary's gonna ask you to move in with him!!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 What?! Really?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 He just told me at the counter. He made me promise not to tell, but Icouldn't hold it in any longer!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I can't believe this!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	  Right, because it's fast. Because, it's so fast. It'sfast!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Relax! It's Phoebe! Not you!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Oh! Good for you Pheebs, way to go! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, but it is fast. Isn't it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Ohhhh!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, I like him a lot but I don't think I'm ready for this!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 So, what are you gonna do?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I don't know. I'll just handle itI'll ask you to talk to him!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Me?! Why me?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Because you are so afraid of commitment! You talk to him, make himscared like you! Make him aman!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 I'll try, but I'm not sure what good it would do, y'know? Because I'ma lot less afraid of commitment than I used to be.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 That is so sweet! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	  Still terrified, I'll take care ofit. No problem. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Hey Ross, is uh, is Staten Island really an island?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Uh-huh, that's why they call it Staten Island.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Ohhh. I thought it was like Long Island.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	  Also anisland.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Hey, what time is it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	  2:17.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without dropping it,for like an hour?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Are you serious?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to sayanything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Wow! We are pretty good at this! Hey! We totally forgot about lunch!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Oh, I-I, I think that's the first time I ever missed a meal!  Yeah, my pants are a little loose!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	  Hey, you guys
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Hey!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Is Monica here?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey, Ross	 No.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 All right listen umm, I just bought something I'm not sure she's gonnalike it, and it's gonna seem a little crazy, but this is something that I wanted since Iwas a little girl.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 You bought Shawn Cassidy!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Noo! I wish! Okay, you ready? 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey, Ross	 Yeah!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Okay!  Check it out!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 What-what is it?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 What the hell is that?!!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 It's a, it's a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 That, is not a cat! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Yes it is!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Why is it inside out?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Excuse me! But this is a purebred, show-quality Sphinx cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 How much did you pay for that?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, it was a little extravagant, but I a pretty good deal.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Yeah? How much?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 A thousand bucks.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 ON A CAT??!!!!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 It's not a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 All right listen ball boys! My grandmother had one of these when I was alittle girl and it was the sweetest thing! I mean it was so cute, it would sit in my lapand purr all day long, and I would drag a shoestring on the ground and he would chase it!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Free cats do that too, y'know. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 It's not a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Ugh! Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! Okay? I don't carewhat you think! I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson.  Well, what am I gonna call her? Fluffy?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	  Hey, you wanna get something to eat or uh, do you wanna see howlong we can throw this ball back and forth? Huh?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Uhh, the ball thing.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Hey Ross, wouldn't it be great if we could go two straight hours withoutdropping it?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Uhh, yeah it would! Let's do it!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Okay!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	  Uh-oh.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 What?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 I have to pee. And Rachel's in the bathroom!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Man, I didn't think we were gonna make it!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 I know!  Don't switch hands, okay?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Hey ladies! What are you in here for? 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Hey Chandler, what are you doing here?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Gary, I'm here to report a crime.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 It is a crime that you and I don't spend more time together.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  What's up?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Well, I heard that you thinking about asking Phoebe to move in withyou and I thought maybe, we should have a talk. Man to uh, me.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Sure. Okay.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Uh, are you crazy? Are you insane? If you live with Phoebe, you twoare gonna be y'know, live-living together!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Yeah, I-I considered that. I just know it would make me happy.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 You mean scared.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 No, I mean happy.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Scared? Happy?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Chandler, what-what are you doing?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 I am trying to open your eyes, my man! Don't you see, if you livedwith Phoebe she's always gonna be there. You're gonna get home, she's there. You go tobed, she's there. You wake up and oh yes, she's there!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 I know! I can't wait!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Were you're parents happy, or something?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Listen Chandler, the way I see it is that I was lucky enough to findsomeone that I really love. I justI wanna be around her as much as I can.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Wow, y'know when you say it, it doesn't sound so scary.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 So you know what I'm talking about, right?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Yeah, I think I do! Y'know what? You move in with her! You move inwith her right now! Maybe I should in with Monica!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 No, it's too soon for you guys.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	  Yeah, you're right about that.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 now when they found the remains of the Mesozoic Mastodon theydiscovered what appeared to be the remains of a Paleozoic Amphibian in its jaws!How did it get there?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Maybe this should be more of a quiet game.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  Hey guys!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Hi!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Joey, I left my watch on the counter last night. It was right here, where is it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 I don't know.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 All right, come on, I'm-I'm late for work!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 How do you know? You don't have a watch.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Guys, could you please just stop throwing the ball for one minute andjust help me find it!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Oh, I don't know. Yeah, can't do it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 What?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Monica, whatever you do, do not drop that ball!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Yeah, we haven't dropped it in 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 2 hours, 27 minutes.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Really?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  I-I'm not gonna be able to make it intowork today, I don't feel very good.   Yes!!   Wow! Uh, for a second there I thought I was really better, but I'm not. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Hey Rach!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Hey.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Check it out! Almost 3 hours without droppin' it!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh, wow! Congratulations, that's quite a waste of time.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Rach?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 You have scratches all over you, what happened? 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, it's my cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  What?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh yeah, I got a cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 I don't want a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Oh, don't worry, it's not a cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Yeah.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 You guys this cat is nothing like my grandmother's cat. I mean,it's not sweet, it's not cute, I even dragged that little string on the ground, and itjust flipped out and scratched the hell out of me. And I swear, I know this sounds crazy,but every time this cat hisses at me I know it's saying, "Rachel!"
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Doesn't sound as crazy as paying a thousand dollars for a cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  What?! You paid a thousand dollars for a cat when you owe me300!!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, I was gonna let you play with it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Hi!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Hmm, did you talk to Gary about the moving in thing?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Yes I did, and I think you should do it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 What?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 He's a great guy, y'know? And he loves you a lot, you are a very luckylady.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 You are useless! Freaking out about commitment is the one thingyou can do! The one thing! And you can't even do that right! God!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Im sorry.  If you ask me, I'd move in with him.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Ohh!! God!  Ooh!  Get out ofhere, good for nothing.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Hey Chandler.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Hey Gar!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Hi sweetie.  Hi, can I talk to you for a second?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah! Okay. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 You look very pretty today.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Thanks! Okay. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Here's the thing.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Y'know I really want to move this relationship forward.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Because if you're not moving forward, y'know you're just moving backwards.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No that's not true. If you're not moving forward, you're just stayingstill. And staying still is good. Watch this.  
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Phoebe?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 I want you to move in with me.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 That is so sweet. But don't you think it's a little too soon? I meanthere's so much we don't know about each other.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Oh. Oh-oh-okay, I get it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I justI don't want us to jump into something we're not ready for.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Uh-huh.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I really don't want to mess up what we have. I'm justI'm worriedit's gonna be a big mistake.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Yeah.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Which is why my answer is yes!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	  Really?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Uh-huh!  I'm sohappy. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	  Monica! Stop throwing it so hard! We're on the sameteam!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Four hours? You guys have been doing this for four hours?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 That's right baby.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 All right, let me in. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	  No-no! Don't do it! Don't!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 What?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 He's a dropper!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Oh yeah, that's right!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 I'm not a dropper!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 It's really a uh-uh three person game, y'know?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 It's throwing and catching!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 All right. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Oh! Oh! That's so hard. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Whoa-whoa you guys, it's not a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Oh myOh good God!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	  I give up you guys, Idon't know what I'm going to do with this thing!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Baking it didn't help, huh?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 So, why don't you just take it back to where you got it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 I tried! They won't take her back.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Maybe that's because she's a minion of the anti-Christ.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Rach, why won't they take it back?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, they said would but they would only give me store credit. I mean,what am I going to do, get a thousand regular cats?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Look, if you want you can keep it at our place until you find out whatto do with it.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 No Mon that's not the point. I'm out a thousand dollars, I'm allscratched up, and I'm stuck with this stupid cat that looks like a hand! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Oh my God, the cat's made my eyes water! Don't-don't throw it to me! Myvision's been compromised!!  Oh God! Okay. Okay.It's okay. Man, that was close.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Yeah, you almost overreacted to something.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe, Gary	  Hey!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 Hey!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 We have great news!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 We're moving in together! Isn't it great! Yay!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 Congratulations! Congrats!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I know, I'm so excited!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 So am I!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Well, you're not more excited than I am! No way! I'm the mostexcited!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Okay, I'll see you at the station later.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Okay, yeah, I'll see you later! Don't forget about the moving in!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 All right.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 So you're moving in with him. What happened?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I couldn't tell him no. He got so sad. Maybe it'll be all right. I doreally like him a lot and probably do it eventually anyway and plus, think of all themoney I'll save on stamps.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Why, do you write him a lot?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, I just heard when people live together, they split the cost ofstamps. Don't they?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 Yeah! That's right. Yeah-yeah! Yeah!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm sorry, the oven mitts really freaked me out.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Hey, honey! Okay, so did you find any apartments? Anything in BrooklynHeights?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, nothing.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Oh really?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Nothing at all?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, as soon as something opens up we'll move right in. Unless it doesn'thave a pool, I need a pool. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Uh-huh!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Take a seat. You okay? You feeling all right? 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	  Yeah, I feel great. 'Cause we're moving in together.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 So you uh, you checked the paper for listings in Brooklyn Heights, right?You-you checked the Post?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah, uh-huh, there was nothing.  Can I get some water?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 In a minute. You-you checked today's Post?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Umm, yeah! Today's.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 'Cause uh, this is today's Post and uh, these are the listings I found.  Brooklyn Heights, two bedroom. Brooklyn Heights, one bedroom.  Brooklyn Heights,  Brooklyn Heights, Brooklyn Heights!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	  Are these for rent! I thought people were justbragging!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Let me tell you what I think might be going on.  No-no-no, don't look at the table. Look at me.  Okay, I think somebody asked someone to move in with them. And I think someone said,"Yes" but now she's having doubts because things are moving to fast for someone.Does that sound at all possible to you?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yes. Yes! Fine! I am someone! You want me to say it? I havedoubts!  I'm sorry! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Phoebe
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Phoebe, it's okay that you feel this way. I mean it is soon. Andthere's a lot of things we don't know about each other, and I just figure that everythingI really like. And the things I don't know, I get to learn about at someplace with bothour names on the mailbox.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 That's so sweet.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Sweethart, but none of that matters if it's too soon for you. It's fine!We don't have to move in together. I justI want you to be happy
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Living with you would make me happy.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Phoebe, you don't have to say that.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 No, I really wanna live with you! I wanna move in with you!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Are you sure?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yes. Definitely! Yes! Let's live in an apartment that we both live in! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Oh that's great!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Oh wait, one sec. One sec.  Hey you! Behind theglass! Who are you looking at! I've always wanted to say that when I was in one of theserooms,  which was never!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Show cat! Quality show cat! Show cat! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 1	  Oh my God! What's wrong with your baby?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 It's not a baby! It's a cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 1	 Eew! It's creepy looking!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh no! No! It's actuallyit's very sweet. It's very sweet. Look! Yeah, do you want it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 1	  No, I hate cats.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, so then what are you doing to me? Okay? Just get out of here! Allright? Move on!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 2	 Wow! What an unusual cat!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Yes! Thank you! Exactly! You want it?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 2	 Maybe. I was thinking about getting a cat, I was just going to goto the shelter  but Okay, why not?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh, terrific! That'll be $2,000.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 2	 What?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Okay, a thousand.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 2	 I thought you wanted to adopt your cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Well, I do, but you're just gonna have to actually look at this as moreof an investment than a cat.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Woman No. 2	 Okay, yeah, I just wanted a cat. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	  Obviously youknow how to haggle, so I'm not gonna try and take you on. Okay? So $800 and I don't callthe cops because you're robbing me blind! Blind!  Just take cat, leavethe money, and run away! Run away! Damnit!  Cat, can't you at least smile or something?!  Okay, did anybody just hear that? Anybody?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 I'm starving! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Come on guys! Suck it up! We're closing in on ten hours! It's gut-checktime!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 I don't know who made you the boss? All right? We  inventedthis game!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Please! I made this game what it is.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Not fun anymore?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 I'm still hungry! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 All right, there's some pizza at my place, we can all eat with one handright? Are you with me?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 I am!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 All right! Let's go!  Let's go Team Monica!  All right, we can work out the name later.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Rachel! What is your cat doing in one of my bowls!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 It's not! I'm defrosting a chicken.  Oh, I uh sold Mrs.Whiskerson.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 Oh, thank God!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Did you get your money back?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Yeah, 15 hundred dollars.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Wow! You made a profit!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gunther	  I just came for the red-velvet pillow.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh yeah, there you go. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gunther	 Thanks Rachel. And-and don't forget you-you can come visit her anytimeyou want.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Oh good, great! I'll-I'll keep that in mind. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gunther	  Hey! So what is this? Some kind of snake or something?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 I really like waking up with you.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 I like waking up with you too.  Oh! It's such abeautiful morning.  Oh, I can stay here allday.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 That would be great!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 We could have breakfast in bed
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Gary	 Wait, just a second. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Okay.  Oh! Oh no.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 All right! Come on Monica! Look alive! Come on, look alive!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	  Oh good, you're all up.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Phoebe! It's 6 o'clock in the morning! Why aren't you at Gary's?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, that's over.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 What?!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Come on! Gary's such a great guy! Whatever the problem is, you canwork it out!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 He shot a bird!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Oh that is over!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 That's terrible! I'm sorry!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Phoebe, are you okay?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah. Yeah, I'll be alright.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Oh hey, here Pheebs. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	  Nah, I don't feel like playing. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 It's okay. It's okay. Just pretend that it didn't happen! Okay? No oneneeds to know! I mean, Phoebe's not an official ballplayer! I mean, only officialballplayers can drop the ball!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 All right. Okay. I'm starving! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Phoebe, honey, wanna get some breakfast?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Phoebe	 Yeah!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Monica	 Okay! Okay, let's race! First one there wins! Ha-ha! 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 You guys wanna eat here?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	All	 Yeah! As long as we're here!
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Joey	 Man that was great! Huh? Can you believe how long we threw that ballaround?
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 Yeah, it is amazing it lasted that long.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Ross	 I know. My arm is killing me.
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Rachel	 No, I meant with the dropper over here. 
05	21	0521	The One With The Ball	Chandler	 Y'know, how did I get this reputation as a dropper? Okay? I'm anythingbut a dropper. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 What's going on?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Well, my eye is a little itchy.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Uhhh, mine too! Yeah.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	  Wow! It's really red! You should go see my eye doctor.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Richard? I'm not gonna go see your ex-boyfriend!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Oh, Richard. That's all I ever hear, Richard, Richard, Richard!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Since we've been going out, I think I've mentioned his name twice!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Okay, so Richard, Richard!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 It's not Richard! Okay? It's this new guy and he's really good.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Well, I'm sorry I'm not going to an eye doctor!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Oh God, here we go!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 What?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Anytime anything comes close to touching her eye or anyone else's she likefreaks out. Watch! Watch! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  Ross! Come on! That's all right! Fine--Okay, I have a weirdthing about my eye. Can we not talk about it please?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	All	 All right, fine.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Hey Rach, remember that great song, Me, Myself, and I? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  Monica! Come on!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Hey, does anybody want to get some lunch? All those in favor say I? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  Ross! Stop it! Come on!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 How much did I love The King and I? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Chandler!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Me too! Me too! Me too!  
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Just stop it! Come on!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 You okay there man?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Yeah, I got too excited!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 All right, I gotta go. I'm taking Ben to the park.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Ohh, give him a kiss for me!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 All right, bye!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Bye!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Bye!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Later! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	  I am so sorry you got caught in the middle of that. Ididn't mean to be so out there. I am furious with him!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Wow umm, calm down.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 I'm trying, but man that guy can push my buttons!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Why are so mad at him?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Look, I don't wanna talk about it. Okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Well, it just seems that
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 You wanna be on my list too? Keep talking! Has anyone seem my list bythe way?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Uh, no Pheebs. What's it look like?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Uh, it's a piece of paper and it says, "Ross" on it.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  Hey. I just got off the phone with Estelle and guesswhat.  I GOT THE LEAD IN A MOVIE!!!!!!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 You got the lead in a movie? That's amazing! What's the movie about?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 It's called Shutter Speed, it's really cool! Yeah, umm, I meet this girlin the subway and we fall in love in like a day, right? And then, shedisappears But I find out where she lives and when I get there this like old ladyanswers the door and I say, "Where's Betsy?" Right? And she says, "Betsy'sbeen dead for 10 years."
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Ohh-oh, chilling!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 And the best part is, we're filming in the desert outside Vegas!  And you know what that means buddy!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Yeah, I know that means buddy!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Road trip! Yeah, we can rent a car! I just have to be there by Tuesday!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh wait, my grandmother's dead.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Well, uh, we can talk about that too Pheebs.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 No! No, her cab! She probably won't be using it; you can drive it to LasVegas.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 All right! Thanks Pheebs!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, what are we going to do about my job?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Oh umm, not go.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 All right, great, road trip baby!  This okay with you?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Chandler! You don't have to ask for my permission.  You can go.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Thank you.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Hey Rach, come on! We're gonna be late for the eye doctor appointment!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  All right! Let's get this over with! Ugh! Ohhh! No! Look what I did!  Oh, I mean, look atthis mess! I mean, we're probably gonna have to clean this up! Y'know? We're gonna have toreschedule!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 No. If you thought this mess is going to bother me, you are wrong! Allright, let's go Blinky!  Chandler!!!! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh hey Joey! What's up?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 I can't decide which route to take to Vegas. Hey, you've traveled a lotright?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Yeah, I've been around.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Okay, so-so which route should I take the northern route or the southernroute?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Ooh, if you take the northern route there's a man in Illinois with abeard of bees. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Great! Problem solved!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 But on the southern route there's a chicken that plays tic-tac-toe.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Well, back to square one.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh, I know a way that you can decide! All right, I'm going to ask you aseries of questions and you answer as quickly as you can.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  Yes!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Good, but wait. Okay, all right, here we go. Now I want you to relax.Take a deep breath. Clear your mind.  Which do you like better peanut butter oregg whites?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Peanut butter!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Which would you rather be a fireman or a swimmer?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 A swimmer!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Monica. Oh huh, I always thought it would be Rachel.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 No thinking! No thinking! Tie or ascot?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Ascot!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 North route or south route?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 North route!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Bamn! There you go! Huh?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Wow! That was incredible! Beard of bees, here I come!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	  Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh, this guy again. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Hey man, what's up?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Uhh, not much. You guys want to see a movie tonight?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Sure, what do you want to see?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 I don't know, umm
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Oh, I know how we can decide. Phoebe, show him your game!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Umm, no thank you. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 What's with her?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 I don't know. But hey, I know we can decide. Okay, I'm gonna ask youquestions and you answer real quick. Okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 What do you like better action or comedy?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Action.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Who would you rather sleep with Monica or Rachel? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Dude, you are sick.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot you had that whole Rachel thing.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Oh my God! What does that thing do?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	  Oh that's an eye removal machine.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 All right, I'm outta here!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 I'm kidding! I'm kidding!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	The Doctor	 Hi Rachel!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	The Doctor	 I'm Dr. Miller. Monica told me you were a little nervous, but don'tworry everything's gonna be just fine.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 So were done then!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Almost! But first, we gotta start.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 This is a glaucoma test.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Sit down.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 But your chin here.  Now, you'll feel a small puff ofair in each eye.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  What?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 A small puff of air, now come on!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Here we go.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 All right.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 123! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 I'm sorry. All right, I'll just stay in here this time.  Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Ready?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 12 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Y'know what, I'm gonna hold her head.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 That's okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Okay. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay. Okay!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 12!   Y'know what? You'reyoung; you probably don't have glaucoma.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  Great!! It was very, very nice to meet you sir--Ow!Hey! What are you doing?! Are you crazy! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Okay. You've got a small, minor infection in that left eye. I wantyou to take these drops three times a day and you'll be as good as new.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Yeah, no, I don't-I don't put things in my eye.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Okay then, I guess we'll see you back here in three months.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Great!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 And I'll fit you for a glass eye.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay, just give me the damn drops! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Dr. Miller?  P E C FD.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Dr. Miller	 Very good Monica! You know where they are.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 I sure do!  And you don't get one!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Y'know, I-I gotta tell ya, those eye drops are a miracle. My eye is a100% better.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 They're still in my coat.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Damn!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	  Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Hey! You ready to go?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Yeah, listen, how cold is it going to be there? Do I need a coat orwill all these sweater vests be enough? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 What?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 I love you.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Man, I wish Ross was coming with us! Y'know? I'm gonna miss him!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Thanks a lot! I just got that jerk out of my mind!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Hey, so where are we staying? Is the movie putting us up in a bighotel suite?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Uh no, not really. It's an independent film y'know? So we don't have areal big budget. I figured I'd just stay in your room.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 I see, but once you get your first paycheck you'll be springing a bighotel suite, right? I mean, lead in a movie, they must be paying you a lot?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Oh yeah! For every dollar Shutter Speed makes, one penny of it goes rightin Joey's pocket.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 So you don't get paid unless the movie makes money?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Did you not hear the plot of the movie? "She's been dead for tenyears." I'm gonna be a millionaire!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	  Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 I just wanna say good-bye to you guys and to see if you guys willplace a little bet for me, huh? Twenty bucks on black 15.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 You got it!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 All right!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 All right, bye-bye now!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Bye!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Bye you guys!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Bye-bye!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 I wanna say good-bye at the car!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Okay!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Anybody want to say good-bye to me at the car?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Oh honey, I'll say good-bye to you at the car if you don't mind thepuss.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 See ya! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Well, wait a minute! The puss is good! It means it's healing! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, what 'cha reading?  Pheebs? Hello?  Phoebe?  Phoe-Phoebe!  Come on! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't see you there.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Phoebe, are you, are you mad at me, or something? 'Cause if are please,tell me what it is I did!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Well, if you don't know I can't help you.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Well, I don't know.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Well, I can't help you.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Well, whatever it is I'm-I'm very, very sorry. Okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Apology accepted.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Okay. So we're, we're good?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 All right.  I'll uh, I'll see you later, okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	  Bye, fat ass. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 ALL RIGHT!! Phoebe now come on! Will you please tell me what it is I didthat mad you so mad at me!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 I don't know! I don't remember!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Well if you can't remember, can't we just forget about this?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh no, I am mad at you. I know that much. But, I am sorry about the fatass thing. You actually have a very sweet little hiney. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Man, I'm getting pretty tired. You're might have to take over soon.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 We've been driving for a half-hour, and you haven't looked at the roadonce.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Don't worry, it's out there!  I think I just need lunch.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Yeah.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 You wanna eat?  My treat!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Isn't that Ross's money?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Yeah. Okay. Ross's treat! Where do you wanna eat?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 I don't know.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Ooh, hey, I know how we can decide! All right, uh, I'm gonna ask you abunch of questions and then you have to answer real fast. Okay? So uh, clear your mindClear it right out! Clear it out! Clear!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Okay!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Okay, uhh, would you rather be too wet or too dry?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Too dry.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Do you believe in ghosts, yes or no?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 No!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Is this movie gonna be my big break?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 No!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  What?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Yes.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Dude you said, "No!"
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 I also said, "Yes!"
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 You don't think this is going to be a big break for me?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 No!  Ahhh!!!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 I don't believe this!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Look Joe, I just, I just don't want to get your hopes up real high.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 What are you talking about?! I'm the lead in a movie!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 They're not even paying ya! This doesn't even sound like a real movie!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Y'know what? I don't need this! Okay? I don't know why you're dumping allover my big break.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Joe, I don't think this is going to be your big break.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Is that why you're on this trip, huh? Make me feel like a loser? 'Cause ifit is, I'll tell ya, I-I-I'd rather be alone.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Oh, you don't want me on the trip?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Not if you're gonna be like this!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 All right, I'll tell ya what, the next time you ask me a question likethat I'll lie.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Yeah! I don't want you on the trip!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 All right, fine! Fine! Why don't you pull over? I'll get out rightnow!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Fine!  Get out!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 You're not actually supposed to stop on the bridge.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Get out!!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 All right!!  Wait! Wait, there's nosidewalk! Yeah, I'm gonna die here.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Okay, are you mad at me because my hair gel smells?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 No.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Are you angry at me because I said your handwriting is childlike?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 No that made me feel precious.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Oh, I know! Umm, is it because he's always correcting people's grammar?Whom! Whom! Sometimes it's who!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Yeah? Sometimes it's 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Oh, did you beat him at a board game? He turns into such a baby when hestarts to lose.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Okay, I'm the baby. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Eh! Stop it!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	  Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Chandler! What are you doing here?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Hey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Joey kicked me out of the car on the George Washington bridge!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	All	 Why?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 I don't know! He went crazy! Y'know, we were playing that game whereyou-you ask a question and you answer it really fast.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 That game should not be played without my supervision. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Well, I don't know what mad him so mad, y'know? All I said was thatuh, I didn't think this wasn't gonna be his big break, that this movie wasn't going to doanything for him, and that uh, y'know it didn't sound like a real movie--Okay, heshould've pushed me off of the bridge.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 What's in the bag?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Oh, I figured you guys would all be mad at me. So I got you some giftsthat I found on the side of the road.  Who wants the teddy bear withone leg?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 I do!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Not even close.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay, then y'know what? Help me! I need help! I can't do this!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Okay! All right! Let's do it!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 All right!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Sit down. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 All right.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Put your head back.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Yes!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 All right.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Now, open your eyes.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay, they are. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 How many fingers am I holding up? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  Four.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Oh my God, I was thinking four.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Really?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Yes! All right, y'know what? Why don't we start with a practice run?Okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 No drops!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Great!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Okay.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 On three, 123!  Now my pillow's all wet! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Well, well, you said it was practice!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Then why did you move?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Because I knew you were lying!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 All right, come here! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	  What are you? Monica!! Stop it!! Oh my God!Stop it! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 I am going I'm going--Turn it over!  I'm I am going to get these drops in your eyes. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Oh my God! You really are freakishly strong!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Monica! Stop it!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	  Damn! It's empty!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Wow, y'know if Joey and Chandler walked in right now, we could make afortune! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Ooh that is definitely Chandler, Joey, or Ross.  Or-or Rachel!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	  Hello?   It's Joey.   I'm so glad you called! Chandler told me what happened.Y'know he's really upset about it.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  Not as upset as he's gonna be when he findsout what I did with his sweater vests!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 What did you do to his sweater vests?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Let's just say there's a well-dressed pack of dogs in Ohio. Hey Monicalisten is-is Phoebe there? I gotta ask her something about the car.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Yeah, she's here. Hold on a second. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Hey, dude!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Hey Pheebs! Listen, this wooden box keeps sliding out from under the seat.What-what is it?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh that's my grandma.  And thanksJoey she's having a really great time. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	  Is that Joey? Is that Joey? Let me talk to him!I wanna talk to him!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Okay Joey? Chandler's here, he was wondering  Okay, I guess he ran out of change.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Y'know, he won't even talk to me. How am I going to apologize to himif he won't even talk to me?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Well, maybe you should send him something. So that when he gets to LasVegas he'll know that you're sorry.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 That's a good idea. I wonder where I could  get a basket ofporn
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 No, don't-don't say I'm sorry with porn!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Chandler	 Really?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Y'know what you should send him? A cartoon of cigarettes. 'Cause thatwhy he could trade it for protection. No. That's prison.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	  Okay Pheebs, I know how we're going to figure this out. Okay,clear your mind and answer the first thing that comes into your head. Okay?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 What do you like better flora or fauna?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Fauna.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Who would you rather be Simon or Garfunkle?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Garfunkle.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Why are you mad at me?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 You said I was boring--Ohh!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 When did I say you were boring?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh my God, I remember now! We were playing chess!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Phoebe! You and I have never played chess!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Phoebe	 Oh, come on! Yes, remember that time on the frozen lake? We were playingchess, you said I was boring, and then you took off your energy mask and you were CameronDiaz!  Okay, there's a chance this may have been a dream.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Hey-hey! Stanley! Hey-hey! You're leading man is here! Let's get to work.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 Umm, slight change of plans. We've shut down.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Wh-what?! Why?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 It's a money thing, we don't have any.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  You're kidding right?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 No.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 What?!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 It-it's probably just temporary. We're hoping to get some more moneysoon, so if could just uh, hang out.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Uh, hang out?! How long?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 I don't know. A week? Maybe two? The money will turn up! People willalways wanna invest in movies! Hey, you're not rich are ya?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 No!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Stanley	 Eh, worth a shot.  Look Joey, let me know whereyou're staying, okay? 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	The Grip	 Hey pal, are you Joey Tribbiani?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Yeah.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	The Grip	 These got left for ya. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Thanks.   Congratulations on yourbig break. 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	  Hello?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  Hey Monica, it's Joey!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Hey Joey! Aww, you remembered even though you're a big star!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Aw, come on! It'll be years before I forget you!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Joey, what's it like on a movie set, huh? Do you have a dressing room?Do you have a chair with your name on it?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Uh, well yeah-yeah, I've got all of that going on. Yeah, listen uh, I wantyou to make sure you tell Chandler that he couldn't have been more wrong! Uh-oh! I gottago Monica, my uh, my sushi's here! 
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	  Sorry about that. Thanks for waitin'.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	The Husband	 Okay!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Joey	 Everybody smile!  Okay, thanks a lot! Enjoy yourstay at Caesar's! We hope it's toga-rrific!  Kill me. Kill menow.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Ross	 Hey Rach, can you pass me the TV Guide?
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Yep!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Go!!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 What?!! Stop it! Stop it! Oh my God!
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Monica	 Okay! Okay! Okay!  We'll see you in about 3 to 4 hours.
05	22	0522	The One With Joey's Big Break	Rachel	 Oh! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Pheebs? Could you get that? Please?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Why? Just 'cause you're too lazy to get up off your touchie? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No! No! It's just that all the people in the entire world that Iwant to talk to are right here.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Okay! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Sucker!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Hello?  Hey Joey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey Pheebs! Listen, uh can you do me a favor? I forgot the pin number tomy ATM card can, can you get it for me?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure! Where is it?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, I scratched it on the ATM machine down on the corner.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh! So you're 5639?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 That's it! Thanks Pheebs!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Ooh, do you want to talk to Chandler?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Is that Joey?!  Let me talk to him!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 No!  Because he didn't believe in my movie! Whichis a big mistake because it is real! Real!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	A Casino Boss	 Hey! Tribbiani! Get back to work! Break time's over!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Who was that?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh, my stunt double. Yeah, and y'know, he's getting a little too familiarfor my tastes.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Y'know what? I have been trying to apologize to him allweek! If he's not gonna let me do it on the phone, I'm gonna go down there and do it inperson.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh Pheebs, I heard that. Can you put him on?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Don't come out here!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, I've supported you one hundred percent and I want toprove that to you in person!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 I got that! I forgive ya! Don't come out here!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Forgive me? You haven't been taking my calls in a week!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, I'm totally over it Chandler. Friends forever! Don't come out here!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	A Tourist	  Would you mind doing a picture with us?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Uh, what was that?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, Entertainment Tonight.  Yeah, okay so, goodtalking to ya and don't come out here. All right. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Monica! I'm sorry I'm late!  Monica?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	  Phoebe?  Oh, Phoebe,I'm so sorry. Have you been here long?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  It's okay. What the hell took you so long?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, you can not tell Chandler. Okay? That I ran into Richard.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Which Richard?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 The Richard.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Richard Simmons?! Oh my God!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Noo! My ex-boyfriend Richard! Y'know the tall guy, moustache? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh! Okay, that actually makes more sense. So how was it?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 It was, it was really nice. We started talking and I-I ended up havinglunch with him.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 That is so weird! I had a dream that you'd have lunch with Richard.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Really?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But again, Simmons. Go on.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 The strange part was, he was really nice, umm and he looks great, but Ididn't feel anything at all!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ooh! So now why can't we tell Chandler?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Because it would totally freak him out and tomorrow's our anniversary. Ijust don't want anything to spoil that.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, I can't believe you guys lasted a whole year!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Wow! I owe Rachel 20 bucks!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 On a totally different bet.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 It's almost our anniversary!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I know. Can you believe it? One year ago today I was just yourannoying friend Chandler.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Awww! Now you're just my annoying friend Chandler.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Huh.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I got you a present!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, but it's not 'til tomorrow!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know, but you have to open it today! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	  Okay! There you go! It's twotickets to Vegas!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wow!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 For this weekend! Oh gosh, it would be perfect, we get to see Joey pluswe get to start our anniversary celebration on the plane. We can call it outplane-aversary.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Do we have to?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 No.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay this is great, but Joey said he didn't want any of us out there.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, he just doesn't want us to go through any trouble. Think of howexcited he'll be when we go out and surprise him! Plus we get to have our own,ani-Vegas-ary! A-Nevadaversary!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, I think we should see other people.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 But we can go, right?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 It's a great idea. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, I'm gonna go too!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Y'know Pheebs, it's kinda our  anniversary.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh please, you are not gonna ditch again like you did with London.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ditch you? Phoebe, you were pregnant with the triplets!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, great story! I'm going!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hi!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey, you guys, listen, this weekend we're all gonna go to Las Vegas tosurprise Joey! Including me!! You wanna go?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I guess I could take a couple days off work.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Of course you can take a couple days off work because this trip includesme!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh no, wait a minute, wait, I've got a presentation tomorrow. I can'tmiss that.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, but I've got tickets to the Van Gogh exhibit! I've been waiting like ayear for this.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Art lover!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What'd you say?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I said art lover.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Is that supposed to be an insult?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I don't know, I'm very tired. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 So Rach, maybe you and I could fly out together Saturday.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 That sounds great.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah? All right I'll call the airlines. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Yeah, that would be nice actually, to have the apartment to myselffor a night.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, so you can walk around naked.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No! So I can be by myself. Y'know? Have a little alone time.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Naked alone time.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No! Phoebe just because I'm alone doesnt mean I wanna walk aroundnaked. I mean, you live alone, you don't walk around naked.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Uh-huh! Why do you think it takes me so long to answer the door?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So, so far is this trip to Vegas better or worse than the trip toLondon?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So it's pretty much the same Pheebs.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, what about after I give you these candies? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, I guess it's a little better now.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ah-ha! Okay,  Las Vegas 1, London 0! I'll be rightback. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Happy plane-aversary.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Aww! I love you!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Can I give you a present now?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay!  Oh man!Dont tell me I did this!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I love the "I forgot the present" fake out!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How do you feel about the, "I really did forgot the present,please forgive me" not fake out?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh that's okay. Dont worry about it, you can give it to me when weget back.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ohh that's the worse thing that can happen on an anniversaryever!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh good! All right, so you decided to tell him about theRichard thing.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What-what Richard thing?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh no. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What Richard thing?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Simmons! Go with Simmons!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, I umm, I ran into Richard yesterday and he asked me if I wanted togo for a bite and I did. The only reason I didn't tell you is because I knew you'd get madand I didn't want to spoil our anniversary.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I'm not mad.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Really?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh yeah! Yeah, so you-you bumped into Richard! You grabbed a bite!It's no big deal. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Great!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, London 1
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Oh! Look what happened!   Huh, check me out! I'm in my kitchennaked! I'm picking up an orange.  I'm naked!  Lighting the candles, naked, andcarefully. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Oh my God! That's Rachel naked! I can't look at that! Iam looking at this.  Okay, vivid colors, expressive brushstrokesUnless she wants me to be looking at that. She knows I'm home. Sheknows I can see her. What kind of game is she playing? I think maybe someone's lonelytonight. Oh-ho, Dr. Geller! Stop it! You're being silly! Or, am I?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya baby! Ow! Love to love ya, baby!  Darnit!  Ugh.  
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 May I come in?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Uh, yeah, if you want too.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Do you want me too?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, sure?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 So do I.  Okay Rach, before anything happens  I just want to lay down a couple of ground rules. This is just about tonight. I don't to go through with this if it's going to raise thequestion of "Us."  Okay? I just want this to be  about what it is! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And um, what-what is that Ross?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 The physical act of love. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  What?! Are you crazy?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh so-so you weren't trying to entice me just now with your-yournakedness?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Oh God, you saw me?! Oh!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 You weren't trying to entice me with your nakedness.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Noo!! No! You thought, you actually thought I wanted to have sex withyou?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! No!  No!  No-no-no-no. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh wow! Im sorry, but Ross you kicked off your shoes!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Can we, can we just forget this ever happened?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes of course, absolutely! You're right. I'm sorry.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thank you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 All right I guess I'm, gonna go pack. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Oh wait! One more thing umm, do-do we still need to uh settle thequestion of "us?"
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey you guys wait! Guys!  This place is so muchbetter than London! Okay? This lady dressed like Cleopatra gave me a coupon, 99 cent steakand lobster dinner. Huh!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Phoebe, you don't eat animals. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 For 99 cents, I'd eat you.  Okay, I can totally settledown here. It's got everything I could ever want, including Joey! Look!  Oh! Look! Hi!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh my God.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey! Joey! Hey! Hey!! Wow! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hi!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Love your condoms my man.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 What-what are you guys doing here? I thought I told you not to come.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Why are you dressed as a gladiator?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh, because I'm shooting a scene right now. Yeah, I uh, I play agladiator. Uh, y'know what? Hold-hold on a second.  Can we cut?Yeah, my-my friends are here, I'm gonna take a little break.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Who are you talking too?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 They uh director. Uhh, her.  All right, all right, it's not a gladiator movie. I workhere.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Why?! What happened?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, the movie got shutdown because they ran out of money, so I'm workinghere 'til it starts up again, if it ever does.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'm so sorry.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell ya.  I'm sorry man.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No-no, that's okay, apparently there's a new policy where we don'thave to share everything with everybody.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I knew you were not okay with that.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So you're a gladiator! Wow!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, what-what's going on?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Monica had lunch with Richard.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Dawson?! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Noo! But that would've been so cool!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No! Her boyfriend Richard!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 It meant nothing! Okay? After all this time, how can you nottrust me?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 When you go lunching with hunky moustache men and don't tell me aboutit!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 You're right. I'm sorry. I should've told you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Thanks. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aww, there we go.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I love Vegas!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I promise you, next time I will absolutely tell you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Next time?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ooh, so close.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 There's not gonna be a next time! You can not ever see him again!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can not see him? I mean, you can't tell me what to do!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's so funny, because I think I just did!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh y'know what? If you're gonna be acting like this all night, I really,I don't even want to be around you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Fine with me!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Fine! Happy Anniversary!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Whoa! Whoa! Guys! Please! Come on! Come on! This is obviously just a bigmisunderstanding.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 No it is not!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What are you talking
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey-hey don't look at me! I just work here! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Okay umm, Ross? I'm-I'm really warm, so I'mgoing to be taking off my sweater. Now, I'm just letting you know that this is notan invitation to the physical act of love.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Yep! That's hilarious!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I'm sorry. I'm done. I'm done.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Y'know, last night was embarrassing for you too.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, not really. I mean you've seen me naked hundreds of times.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh-huh. But it was a first for the rest of my building.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. All right, that's true! But y'know I just don't embarrass thateasily.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?! You totally get embarrassed!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, I don't! Ross, I think I'm just a more secure person than you are.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Is that so?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey lady! I don't care how much youwant it! Okay?! I am not gonna to have sex with you in the bathroom! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, y'know in Roman times this was more than just a hat.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Really?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, sure! Sure! They would uh, they would scrub the floors with it! Theywould use it to get the mud off their shoe. And sometimes underneath the horse would getdirty so they would stick it right
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Joey, I uh! I can't believethis is how I'm spending my anniversary.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right well, I'll take you someplace nice then. Look! A guy tipped me ahundred bucks today.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Whoa!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, he was playing blackjack for like an hour and he won $5,000.Can you believe that? $5,000!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Y'know, if I won $5,000 I'd join a gym, y'know build up my upper bodyand hit Richard from behind with a stick! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wait a minute! Why don't I do what that guy did? I'll take this $100 andturn it into $5,000! And then I'll turn that into enough money to get my moviegoing again!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Good luck! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Chandler! I don't need luck. I have thought this through!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I see.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	  Thank you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Thanks.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't believe this! This is like the worst night ever!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Y'know Monica you had a minor setback in your relationship withChandler. Big deal! It's only Chandler.  I am sosorry.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 This is crazy! I mean, it's such a stupid argument. I don't even wannasee Richard again.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So go fix it! Go find Chandler! He's probably up in your room! Tell himthat you're sorry and that you love him.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Y'know what? You're right Phoebe. You're right. Thank you! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure!   Yeah! Las Vegas,number one!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Anybody lose this? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Croupier	 Comin' out. Place your bet.  Dice are out.  Double or nothin'! Pay the front line! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hmm.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Guy	  So uh, I'm on my way back to the bathroom. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, all right. All right! Just keep walkin'! All right?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross! What are you I'm sorry sir. I just, I think he just reallylikes you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey! Y'know that teacher whohad a baby with her student? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What the? What
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hi! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Flight Attendant	 Miss? May I help you?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes, I'm sorry. Do you have any extra pants? Umm, my friend seems tohave had a little accident.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Can I change a hundred? 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Blackjack Dealer	 Changing one hundred!  Good luck sir.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Let's ride.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Blackjack Dealer	  13.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hit me!  Ohh man!  Wait! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Chandler! You are not gonna believe this! I have found my identicalhand twin!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  What?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 My identical hand twin!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What's an identical hand twin?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 What's it sound like? It's a guy with my identical hands! It wasincredible! Chandler, the dealer's hands were exactly like me! It-it was like looking atmy hands in a mirror!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Are you sure you weren't  looking at your hands in a mirror?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Dont you see what this means?! I can forget about that stupid movie.I'm gonna be a millionaire!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  How?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look, I don't have it all worked out yet, but it's gotta mean big money!Come on! Identical hands!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Again I must go back to, how?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 This is Vegas man! People will pay to see freaky stuff! Okay, how muchwould you pay to see this hand  twice? Huh?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Y'know, I-I can't really put a price on that Joe.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, are you unsupporting me again?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No! No! I support you 100%! I just didn't, I didn't get it right away.Y'know now I'm caught up! Identical hand twins! It's a million-dollar idea!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Pheebs!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 I found my identical hand twin!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh, you are so lucky!  Hey! So, where's Monica? Didyou guys make up?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But she just came up here!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That was Joey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I wonder where she is. That is so weird.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, well, she's probably talking to Richard.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Would you stop that! Do you wanna know the first thing she said when shecame back from her lunch with Richard? She didn't feel anything for him. She loves you!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Really?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yes! Now, she feels terrible! She really wants to make up! You gottafind her.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Good.  I should really start wearing hats!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Flight Attendant	  Welcome to LasVegas.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Flight Attendant	  Thank you!  Enjoy your flight?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yes, I did. Thank you very much, it was excellent. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Flight Attendant	  Hope you had a nice flight.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ohh, it was the best!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 I think the check in is that way. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ahh.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hello!  Ohh, kids love me.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Phoebe!  
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You guys are here! Yay!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  What? Did you go to a costume party? Let me guessumm Pancho Vila?  and you're Bob Saget. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Pancho Vila?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What are you talking about Pheebs?  I don't  Oh my God, you drewon me?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey, you wet my pants!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Whoa, what kind of party was this?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross, I have been walking around like this since the plane! Icanyou have so crossed a line. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Rach! Wait! The men's room is that way. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ugh!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 That's like the third time that lady's won on a machine I was playing.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oooohhh, I'll bet she's one of those people.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 M-M-Mole people?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? No-no, a lurker.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh. What's a lurker?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay when you're playing a machine and it hasn't paid out, a lurker waitsfor you to give up and then
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Kills you?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 No. They swoop in and steal your jackpot.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohhh!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh-hmm.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 How do you know about this?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 My nana used to do it. That's how she paid for all my dancekaratelessons.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Dance karate?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes, it's a deadly but beautiful sport. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  All right, it won'tcome off!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 It won't come off!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God! Rach-Rach, are-are-are you sure?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, actually I took it off then I drew it back on.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey-hey-hey you made it!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Joey!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right! Hey-hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Who's your friend? He's hot! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Thanks man.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey listen I uh, talked to Chandler, sorry about the movie.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, don't be sorry. I don't need it anymore. I found my identical handtwin!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Your what?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 My identical hand twin! The person whose hands are exactly like mine! Thisthing is a gold mine!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?! That's not gonna make you any money!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay. Well, if that's how you feel about it, fine! None of you get to livewith me in my great big hand-shaped mansion! Except uh, you Pheebs. You can live in thethumb.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 All right baby, come on!  Yes! Yes! I am on fire!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  See you later Mon.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Wait Chandler, what are you doing?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What does it look like? I'm going home.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 What? Wait! Why?  Chandler! Chandler! Wait! Im sorry, I was just playing for one second! I wastrying to find you to tell you that, look if you don't want me to see Richard again, Iwon't! He means nothing to me!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Come on! I was there!  I know he's the love of your life.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Not any more.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Really?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Really!  All right? Let's forget about this goinghome stuff and celebrate our anniversary.  Okay, this isempty.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, I wanted to make a dramatic scene, but I hate packing.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Uhh, hey. Where's the other guy?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Woman Dealer	 Which guy?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 He's kinda tall, dark hair, hand looks exactly like this.  See?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Woman Dealer	 I don't know about the hands, but the guy that washere before me just went to the bathroom.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay!  How you doin'?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Woman Dealer	 Very busy.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right! Okay. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Yes, hello. I have a question. Umm, I used your pen to drawon my friend's face.  A beard and a moustache.  Thank you. No, she didn't think so.  I knowit's like  anyway,umm well make-up didn't cover it and we've tried everything to get it off and nothing'sworked. What-what do we do?  Yeah.  Uh-huh.  Yeah. Oh! Okay.  Okay, thank you!   Yeah, it's not coming off.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?! What else did he say?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Umm, he said he thought I was funny. So Okay,look-look umm, let's just go downstairs, we'll have some fun, and you will forget allabout it.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross, no! There is no way I am leaving this room looking likethis!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, come on! Rach, it's-it's not that bad.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross, I am a human doodle!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look, just because some idiot drew on your face doesn't mean you shouldn'thave any fun! Okay? And besides, hey-hey-hey no one is even gonna look at you.Okay? This is Vegas! Hello! There are tons of other freaks here!  There are tonsoffreaks here. No other. No. Come on! No onewill notice, I swear!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay, there was some staring and pointing.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, I need a, I need a drink! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, hey y'know, they-they really overcharge you for that stuff.  But who cares?! Because it's all on me!   That is, one bigdrink! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Macadamia nut?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Umm Wow! That's-that's some pricey nut!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hm-mmm! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Really like those Macadamia nuts, huh?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Nope! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Get out of here you lurker!  Go on! Get!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey Pheebs!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh! You made up!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, I couldn't be mad at him for too long.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, she couldn't live without the Chan Love. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh, get a room.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 We have one.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know. Use it.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh-oh-oh, yeah!  That'sright, you take good care of those babies!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Excuse me?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 It's me, Joey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Do I know you?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Joey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Oh-ho, yeah. Yeah, the hand guy.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay, so what are we going to do about this hand twin thing?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Nothing?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look, you and I have been given a gift. Okay? We have to do something withit. Like-like, hand modeling! Huh? Or-or magic! And you know NASA's gonna wannatalk to us!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	  I have to get back to
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa-whoa! We could have our own show!Y'know we could clap our hands together people will love it! Huh? And-and-and I wrote asong for us!  This hand is yourhand! This hand is my hand! Oh wait, that's your hand! No wait, it's my hand!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 That's okay. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  But you haven't even heard the chorus!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh my God, I'm starting to look like my great aunt, Muriel.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  All right. Y'know what? We dont have to go downstairs! Wecan bring Vegas up to us!  All right, comeon, come on, we'll play some blackjack. Here we go.  13.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hit me!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Oohh, 23.  Which is what we play to atthis casino! You win 10 dollars! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I bet 20.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 You're right! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	  A new pair of shoes for the Chan-Chan man!  Yes!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes! I've-I've never seen a roll like this in my life!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 That's right baby! Okay, what do I want now?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, ah umm, ah, a 8. Ah, a 6?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Pick a number! That is your only job!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 8. 8!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Thank you!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 If you get this one, we buy everybody here a steak dinner!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	All	 Yay!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Croupier	 8!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yes!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	All	 Yay!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	  We're not really gonna buy these people steak dinners arewe?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Noo!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, good! Okay, what do I want now?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ahh, ooh, try a hard 8.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Two fours.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay.  
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Croupier	 8!: 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	A Drunken Gambler	  Don't you let her go! You're a lucky guy!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Thank you, Mister Drunken Gambler! Okay, you get this and uh, we getthe biggest suite in the place!  Wait-wait-wait-wait! We  get the biggest suite in the place.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 All right, biggest suite in the place. Come on! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Yes!! I love you! I can't even remember what we werefighting about!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, that's because I had lunch with RichMe neither! Okay, what doI want now?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Another hard 8.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hard 8?! We should call it easy 8!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, okay, I tell you what. You roll another hard eight;  andwe get married here tonight.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Drunken Gambler	 Go! Come on! Roll!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	All	 Roll-roll!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Shut up!! It just got interesting!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 What did you just say?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You roll another hard eight and we get married here tonight.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Are you serious?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes! I love you! I've never loved anybody as much as I love you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I've never loved anybody as much as I love you.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, so if an eight comes up, we take it as a sign and we do it! What do you say?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay! Come on! Let's go! All right!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Okay! That's a four! And where-where's the other one?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Drunken Gambler	 It went under the table.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Nobody move!  Okay, you look that way; I'll look this way!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 All right! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Here it is! Here it is!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 That could be a four or a five. It's your call.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 It's a four.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 I think so too.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh well, lost again.  That's it! You and me, outside!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	 I don't want to see you lose a chunk of that pretty blondhair!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Be cool!  Okay lady, your lurkingdays are over!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	 What?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, from now on everyone you lurk, I'm gonna lurk first! You move onto someone else, I'm gonna be one step ahead of you, every single time! And then I'll beon your ass every hour of every day 'til Monday, because that's when I go home. When doyou leave?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	 Also Monday.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What time? Maybe we can share a cab!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hit me.  Hit me.  Hit me.  Hitme.  Hit me.  Hit me.  Hit me. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  We need more cards.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, and also we need more umm, drinks. Hold on a second.  Whup, okay.  Hello! Vegas? Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? Wewould like some more beers. Hello? Ohh, I forgot to dial!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 That must be our alcohol and beers!  
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ohh, it's Joey! I love Joey! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohh, I love Joey! Joey lives with a duck! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hi!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hey!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look-look-look you guys, I need some help! Okay? Someone is going to haveto convince my hand twin to cooperate!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 I'll do it. Hey, whatever you need me to do, I'm your man.   Whoa-oh-whoa! Areyou, are you okay?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! I'm fine! Thanks! Hey Rach, how you doin'?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I'm doin' good, baby. How you doin'?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ross, don't let her drink anymore! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ohh, here's that Macadamia nut!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohhh!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Nope! Something else. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oops! All right, so what do you want to do now?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 I wanna get out of the room! Y'know, II really miss downstairs.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, y'know what? There's only one way I'm leaving this hotel room.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well hello! I'm Ross!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Good luck to ya!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Excuse me sir, you've got a little something right here. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Wow!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hello!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Hello!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross, Rachel	  Hello!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I won! I won! I finally won!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	 I won! That was my quarter!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Fine! Here! Take a hike toots! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	  Excuse me, sir! This lady played my quarter,this is my money. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	  Is that true miss?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Sells drugs to kids.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	 What?!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 She sells drugs to kids. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Lurker	 It was my quarter!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	  Was it her quarter?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 How about we talk about this over dinner?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	 Okay lady, you're out of here.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No! No, you can't arrest me! No!! I won't go back! I won't go back tothat hell hole!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	 I'm just taking you outside!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, come on, I can't get married until I get something old, somethingnew, something borrowed, and something blue.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, all right, all right, all right! Okay!  Okay, here's something, here's something blue and new.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 You're so efficient. I love you! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Let's go! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 No-no-no! We need something old!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ohh, great, I have condom in my wallet I've had since I was twelve.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 That'll work!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I don't think so.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, now we just need something borrowed!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Here justtake this. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 That's stealing!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No, we'll-we'll bring it back! Just put it under your dress.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ohh. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, one thing at a time. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ahhh! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Are you gonna play?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 No-no, I don't really have any money. Not yet, anyway 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 You can't sit here if you're not gonna play.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ooh-ho-ho!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Hello. My name is ReginaPhalange. I'm a businesswoman in town on business. Would you like to see my card?  Ooh, what did I do with my file-a-facts? I must've left it in conference room B.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	  14.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hit me! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God! May I just say that you two gentlemen have the exact samehands! They're identical! Now, I've never seen anything like that in the business world.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Stop it!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uhh, Ms. Phalange, may I ask you a question as an impartial person at-atthis table?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Please stop it!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wouldn't you pay good money to see these identical hands showcased in sometype of a uh, entertainment venue?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	  If you leave now, I will chop off my hand and giveit too you!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	  Didn't I just throw you out of here?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No, you threw out Phoebe. I'm Ms. Regina Phalange. Phalange!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Security Guard	 Come on, lady! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey'S H, Twin	 Please, please take him too. 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Joey	 Me?! Oh come on, man! You can't do this! Come on!  I'm your hand twin!!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hello! One marriage please!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yep, we wanna get married! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	The Attendant	 Well, there's a service in progress. Have a seat.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler, Monica	 All right.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Dum! Dum-dum-dum! Dum! Dum! Dum! Dum-dum-dum!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 What are you doing?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, that's The Wedding March. Does, does that freak you out?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 No, only because that's the graduation song.
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay!  This is it!  We're gonna getmarried!
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Monica	 Are you sure you wanna do this?
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, hello, Mrs. Ross! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! 
05	23-24	0523-24	The One In Vegas, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Wait!  Okay!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Okay!  This is it!  We're gonna getmarried!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Are you sure you wanna do this?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Well, hello, Mrs. Ross! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Wait!  Okay!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Whoa!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Oh my God!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	  Come on Pheebs! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry! Hurry!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Okay! Okay! Okay! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Oh my God!! Is everybody getting married?!!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Attendant	  N-No running in the chapel!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	  Hey! Dont you give me any of yourHey! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 What are you guys doing here?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Ross and Rachel left us a message saying they were getting married!Isnt that why you guys are here?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Yes! Well that-yes.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Why else would we be here?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Well! What happened?! Did we miss it?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 We actually missed it.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Well, maybe you wouldnt have had you  runin the chapel!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 This is insane!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Whats the big deal, yknow? Its not like its areal marriage.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 What?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Yeah, if you get married in Vegas, youre only married in Vegas.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 What are you talking about? If you get married in Vegas youremarried everywhere.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	  Really?! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Yeah!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Oh my God!Eh! Well
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Ohhh! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Why are we in bed together?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 I dont know. Do-do you have any clothes on?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	  Yeah.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Really?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 No! But we-we didnt havesex-uh, did we? I mean, I dontremember much about last night, it was such a blur.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Oh! I remember laughing! I laughed a lot.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 And we didnt have sex. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Ohh, I mean, we were really drunk. Im just glad we didnt doanything stupid.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	  Tell me about it. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Mornin Pheebs.  Well, my movie has officially beencanceled.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Oh Joey, Im so sorry. You want some of my breakfast?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Nah, Im too depressed to eat. Ill probably eat in like 5minutes. So I guess Ill just fly home with you guys, what times your flight?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 What about my cab?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 I dont need that anymore.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 No, Joey! You borrowed my cab; you have to drive it back.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 I dont want to drive all the way back by myself, I get so lonely. Ohooh! How about you come with me?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 I dont know, its such a long trip.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Itll be great! We-we could talk, and play games! Huh? This could beour chance to like renew our friendship.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Are you asking me to have a frenaissance?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Sure?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 All right. Although I dont think we need one, I never stoppedloving you.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Hi!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Hey.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Hey.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 So, has anyone talked to Dr. and Mrs. Geller yet?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Um-hmm, yeah. They left me a message; they should be here any minute.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Where is the waitress?! Im starving!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Its a buffet man.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Oh, heres where I win all my money back! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Listen, I gotta talk to you.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Sure! Whats up? 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Monica and I almost got married last night.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Oh my God! Thats huge!  Wait a minute, why come Iwasnt invited? And who was going to be your best man? Dont say,"Ross." Do not say, "Ross."
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Look, I just dont think Monica and I are ready to get marriedyet! Yknow? I mean, I love her and everything but seeing Ross and Rachel coming outof that chapel was like a, like a wake-up call that Monica and I are moving so fast.Yknow? And, how do I tell her without crushing her?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Oh! Tell her shes not marriage material.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 What?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Girls say it to me all the time! And believe me, if shes anythinglike me, shes just gonna be relieved.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 How do I tell Chandler that its too soon. Its gonna breakhis heart, hes not gonna think that I dont love him anymore.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Well you dont.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Yes I do!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Good! Good! I was just testing you.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  Hi.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Oh hi! Hi! Yknow, we were just talking about bacon.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 No, we were talking about tennis. Tennis is more believable. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	The Girls	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 What?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Are we gonna talk about what you guys did last night? Or
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	  I dont know.  What do you mean last night?Nothing, nothing uh, happened last night.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Yeah!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Uh-huh! Ross invited us all to watch.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Rach! We werent gonna miss our friends getting married!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	  Who got married?! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  You did.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 What?! Hello! We didnt get married.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 No, we didnt get married! Thats ridiculous!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 We-we-weI remember being in a chapel.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Oh my God.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 IThey would not let us get married when we were that drunk!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 No!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 They let you get married when youre drunk! Most people who getmarried in Vegas are drunk!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Hell, Im drunk right now!  What? Icant have a mimosa with breakfast?! Im on vacation!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 What are you guys gonna do?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Well, I guess we just find a divorce lawyer? 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Well, I think, I think, Ross already has one. Now, this onesfree, right? Because you paid for the first two, so the third ones free.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Laugh it up, but the jokes on you. Because we dont need to getdivorced, okay? We were just gonna get an annulment. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 An annulment? Ross! I dont think surgerys the answer here.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Oh-oh, thats your thing.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 What?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Youre thing. Youre thing. Yknow? Youre the guywho gets divorced.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	All	 Oh yeah!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 No-no, thats-thats not my thing! I do not love gettingdivorced!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Yes you do! This is your third divorce! You love divorce so muchyoure probably gonna marry it! Then it wont work out and youre gonnahave to divorce it, divorcing guy.  Im so drunk.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 So, what do you think we should do?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 I dont know. But I-I-I know I love you!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 I know I love you! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 So where are we on the whole going back to the place where they haveall the marriages thing? I love you.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Thats a good question. Look umm, last night we let the dicedecide. Maybe we should leave it up to fate again. I love you!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Yes, we dont get married unless theres a sign! Okay, sosay uh, say you roll another eight  then theres a definitesign that we should get married.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 All right, eight we get married, but 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 9, 10, 11, 12 wedont get married.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Sounds great.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Okay. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Croupler	 Coming in, we got a shooter! Money please.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Ready?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Ready!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	  Come on eight.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  Yes, yes eight.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Croupler	 Eight! Easy eight. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Wow! I cant believe I actually rolled an eight.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 That was so unlikely. Well, lets get married! I guess.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Wait a minute. That wasnt a hard eight! Last night I rolled a hardeight.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Thats right! It was the wrong kind of eight, no wedding! Damnit!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 I wanted it so bad!  Wanna go pack?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Yeah.  Were doing the right thing, right?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Ohh, of course we are!  We left it up tofate.  If we were supposed to get married there would be aclear-cut sign. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Okay, you have 19 questions left. Use them wisely.  Comeon Joey! You cant win if you dont ask any  QUESTIONS!!!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	  What?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Well, you promised me a fun road trip! Weve been on the road sixhours and youve been asleep for five and a half! We are switching at the next reststop and you are going to drive all the way back! That will be your punishment, yougreedy sleeper!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 All right. All right.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Yeah! And until then you are going to sing to me because theradios broken and you are selfish but have a nice voice.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Really? I dont
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Sing!!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	  I wanna rock and roll all night! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	  Man, this is a long drive! Are my eyes open? No! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	  Morning! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Hey, hubby!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Yeah. Yeah, actually um, I wanted to talk to you about that wholeannulment thing?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Im not going to do that. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Okay! So, well just stay married.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Yes, exactly!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Wow! This is so amazing. I uh, I really thought Id have to talk youinto this more.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Okay, see now Im scared because I dont actually thinkyoure kidding.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Im-Im not kidding. Look I-I, I cant have threefailed marriages. I cant. Okay? I-I am not gonna be that guy!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 What-wh-what so well just stay married forever?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Okay, look, how is this gonna affect you? Really? I mean you fill someform out once and a while and instead of checking the box that says Ms you check the boxthat says Mrs.! Its right next to it!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Ohh, okay, Im sorry. Youre right. Yknow what? Weabsolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far awayfrom each other. All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about whatyoure asking of me.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Im asking you to do me a favor. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 You are asking me to be your wife!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 And as my wife I think you should grant me this favor.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 That kid really kicked me hard on the plane.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Well you did pull his hair.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 He took my snack!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Im not getting into this again!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Okay! Oh God, yknow what? Its really bad.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  Well, I told you not to walk. Here.  There. Okay.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 This doesnt mean anything, does it?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 No!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Okay.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	  How could you pick up a hitchhiker?! He could be arape, a rapist or akiller or something!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Dont you think I asked him that before he got in?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Yknow what? Im not talking to you! You go back to sleep!  And you, are you a rapist?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	 No!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Do you like car games?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	 Yeah, yknow the license plate game?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 I love the license plate game!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Ooh, Ill play! Ill play!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 No-No! You need your sleep. Night-night! Shh!  
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Listen, I know you wanted to talk to me, but I have an idea that may makeyou want to stay married.  We register, and you get tokeep all the presents!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	  No! Ross, come on! No! Listen, look Ithought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not staymarried.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 I dont know if its true.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Oh b-b-but it is!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Oh, okay, yknow what this is? This is a difference ofopinion. And when that happens in a marriage...
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Oh Ross, come on! This is not, this is not a marriage!! This is theworlds worst hangover! Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, Iwill!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 All right. All right, Ill do it.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Thank you.  Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there anysuch thing as an annulment shower?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	 Wait! Wait! There is the train station!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Oh, okay.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	 This is where I get off. Well, I have your address and phone number.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 And I have your name and the fact that youre a drifter, so theballs pretty much in your court.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Hitchhiker	 All right, see ya Pheebs. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Come on Pheebs! I cant take this anymore! Let-let me make it up toyou. Huh?  Ground control to Major Tom. Commencing countdown, engineson. Take your protein pills and put your helmet on!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Stop it! Stop it no! Thats not fair! Yknow I cantresist that beautiful voice!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Pheebs, I am so sorry! I know I promised you a fun road trip with yourfriend and I didnt deliver. But-but-but now I know that you think being awake is animportant part of friendship! So, so, so I will strive to-to stay awake for as long as Iknow you.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 You can still sleep at night and stuff.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Well, thank you. So, can we play 20 Questions now? Ive got a reallygood one! Ive been thinking about it since Kansas.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Okay. Is it a kind of hot sandwich?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Yes.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Is it a meatball sub?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 That is incredible! You are the master!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Huh, thats funny. You look like youre gonna be the
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 No, dont say it! Dont even think it!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 All right. Okay Chandler, enjoy your handful. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 All right, should we just, should we just get married? Yknow? Imean should we just do it? All the signs are telling us to do it.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Im sick of the signs! Its too fast, Im happy the waythings are!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Me too!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 I dont want things to change! Do you?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 No!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 All right then, then nothing changes! Everything is great! Everythingstays the same! And you go unpack because its been three days and its drivingme insane!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Jeez, relax! Its not like were mar-ah-ah!! 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  Yknow I was thinking, what if I uh, unpackhere?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Then all your stuff would be here.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Well, what if all my stuff was here?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean itdoesnt make any sense.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what Imsaying?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Live together? There have been no signs for that.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Me asking is kind of a sign.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 YES!!!!!!!!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Okay!!!!!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Yes! Okay! Okay! Wait-wait-wait!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Okay.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Heres your key 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Oh thanks.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Heres your key. All right, you have to christen it! Now, go outand come back in!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 The door hasnt been locked in five years, but okay! Ready?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Ready!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Okay, a little problem. The key broke in the lock and I cant getin!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Wait! Oh my God! I cant get out!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 This is not a sign!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 No, its not a sign! Its a very old key!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Its an old key!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 Oh my God its old!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 I love you!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 I love you!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Are you hugging the door right now.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Monica	 No.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Yeah-yeah, me neither.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Hey!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Oh, yeah, no problems. Its all taken care of.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Oh yeah, why not?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Pheebs?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 No thanks, Ive already seen one.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Rachel	 Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Okay.  You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 Always.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 I didnt get the annulment.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Phoebe	 What?!
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Ross	 Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 What are you doing?
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 The keys stuck in the lock.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 I can fix it. Hold on. Look out. Look out. 
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	  It still doesnt work.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Joey	 Im not finished.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Oh.
06	01	0601	The One After Vegas	Chandler	 Nice job Joe! Youre quite the craftsmen.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Hey, so did everything go okay with the annulment?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh, yeah, no problems. Its all taken care of.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Ross, thank you. Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh yeah, why not?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Okay, umm, Im gonna get my sweater. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Okay.  You uh, you wanna hear something weird?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Always.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I didnt get the annulment.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 What?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Were still married! Dont tell Rachel. See you later. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	  Hey, do you have any gum?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Oh? Yeah! Sure!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  Wait! Wait! Hi! Listen, Ross can I just talk to you forjust a second?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Oh but Phoebe, were gonna be late for the movie.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh, theres a cab! Taxi!! Good timing, my God, huh? Here you go.  
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, were, were actually just gonna walk causeits right up there at the Angelica.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh, the Angelica!! Go! Go!   You didnt get the annulment?!!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I know.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Ross?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Well, I tried! But when I got to my lawyers office all I could hearwas, "Three divorces. Three divorces!" Look, I just dont want my tombstoneto read, Ross Gellar, Three Divorces.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Dont be worried about that! Your tombstone can say whatever youwant it to say! It could say, Ross Geller, Good at Marriage! Yknow? Minesgonna say Phoebe Buffay, Buried Alive.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Look, all I know is I-I cant have another failed marriage!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 So okay what? Youre gonna be married to a girl who doesnteven know about it?!Op, woman! Sorry.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Well, okay so, I dont have it all worked out quite yet. Justdont say anything to Rachel, please?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Rachel is one of my closest friends.  Although, being the onlyone who knows anything about this does makes me feel special. Okay!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  Okay, stop-stop! Phoebe?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey Rach!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 What was that?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Sorry, mix up. Hey, how was the movie?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 I havent seen it yet!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Well then youd better hurry! The Angelica! Go! Go! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Noooooooo!!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Yknow when we move in together, can I get a gumball machine?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Of course! Joey wouldnt let you have one?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 No. When it comes to sweets, hes surprisingly strict.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey, have you figured out a way to tell him youre moving out? 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 No, no, I keep trying, yknow? I can get out, "Joey, I havetoo" but then I lose my nerve and I always finish with, "go to thebathroom." He may think Im sick.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Yknow, I really have to tell Rachel, but I We just have toget it over with! Yknow, the next time we see them were just gonna tell them.Okay? Thats it.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Oh, so thats this is gonna work now? Youre just gonnaorder me around all the time?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Pretty much.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 All right.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	  Hey Monica!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hi!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	  Hey man, you feeling any better? 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Joey, we have something to tell you.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Oh my God! Youre pregnant!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 No-o-o!  No?  No-o-o! Look Joey, heresthe thing, Monica and I have decided to live together, here. So, Im gonna be movingout man.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Wow!  Well, uh Hey! Im really happy for you guys!Congratulations!  See you later. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Wait! Joey! Joey! Are you okay?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, I gotta go! I got an acting job.  Like youd believe that. This sucks!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Look, I-Im just gonna be right across the hall and I promiseyou, the minute Monica and I break up Im moving right back in with you!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	  Okay! Look-look-look, uh, if youre gonna be moving inwith him I feel its my responsibility to tell you the truth about him! Okay?Hes a terrible roommate! Terrible! He uh, forgets to umm Oh-oh he always, healways ummOh, who am I kidding! Hes the best roommate ever! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey Pheebs! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey, have you seen Rachel?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 No, why?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I have some pretty exciting news!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  Youre pregnant!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 No! Chandler and I are moving in together!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Ooh! Thats good! Wow! But now if you were pregnant, what would youname it? Hint: Phoebe.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Hey! Hi!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Whats up?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Well umm, Chandler and I are moving in together.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh my God. Ohh, my little sister and my best friendshaking up. Oh,thats great. Thats great. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Guys, Im happy too.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Okay, come here! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Wow! Big day huh? People moving in, people getting annulled 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Okay, I gotta go find Rachel but umm, if you guys see her could youplease try to give her some really bad news so that mine doesnt seem so bad?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Bye.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Hmm, something bad to tell Rachel Bad news for Rachel, what couldthat be?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Could ya just, could ya just lay off, please? All right? My life is anembarrassment! I should go live under somebodys stairs!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Ross, its not that big a deal! So youll been divorced threetimes, youll still have a life, youll go on dates
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	  No! No, I wont! Ill be at the bottom of thedating barrel now. The only guys below me will be Four Divorce Guy uh, Murderer Guy,and-and, Geologists.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Ross, youre being ridiculous! Okay? You are cute and smart andsweet and that is much more important than three stupid divorces!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh yeah? Have you ever dated anyone who has been divorced three times?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Yknow thats really fair. Yknow? Most guys who havebeen divorced three times are like 60. Ross, nobody cares about this except you! This-thisembarrassment thing is all in your head! Here, Ill show you! Come here.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 What?! Why?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  Hi! Hi! Listen, my friend Ross is about to be divorcedfor the third time, but wouldnt you date him?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 And if you wait right here, Ill go get Ross. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	  Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Ugh, I thought you were Rachel!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	  What gave me away?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I just tell her, I have to get it over with. I told Ross and Phoebe andshes the only one left!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Okay, so thats it, everybody knows! Its official,were moving in together. No turning back. Are ya scared? Are ya?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 No.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Wow that was my scariest voice! Youre very brave.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Hey.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Ugh, the worse day! Yknow, you think youre making progressat work and then your boss calls you Raquel.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Hey listen, for the first four years of my work everybody called meSha-la-lap.  Seriously.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 I believe you. So, it was right in the middle of a staff meeting so ofcourse no one else wants to correct her so everyone else is calling me Raquel! By the endof the day, the mailroom guys were calling me Rocky!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Well, I-I still think youre very-very nice and very pretty
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 What?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	  All yours babe. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Have a seat.  Okay, listen umm, Chandler and Iare going to live together, here.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Oh my God! Thats so great! Im so happy for you guys! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Really?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 And that was so sweet of you to ask! Oh my God, the three of us aregonna have such a good time living together!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Yes, we are. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 And Chandler, youre gonna have to watch those long showers youtake in the morning because you know Raquel cant be late.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Rach
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Yeah, hes gonna work on that.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Ohh! This is so exciting! Oh God Come and knock on my door
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	  Well be waiting for you
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 once you know the stories, its not that bad. First marriage,wifes hidden sexuality, not my fault. Second marriage, said the wrong name at thealtar, a little my fault. Third marriage, well they really shouldnt allow you to getmarried when youre that drunk and have writing all over your face, Nevadasfault.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Okay, so what do you think ladies? Who wouldnt be interested? Whowouldnt want to date him?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Stephanie	 Well the divorces dont bother me, Id date him. But, notwhile hes still married.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Okay, what about you?  Wouldnt you want a date?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Karin	 Actually, Im dating at all anymore. See, I figured out that I wasonly dating guys that were like yknow bad for me, so until I work that out
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  Whatever! What about you Meg?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Meg	 Well, I dont care about the divorces either, but I wouldnt datehim. Its just that hes obviously still in love with this Rachel girl.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 What?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  She said, "Hes obviously still in love withthis Rachel girl." 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 This is crazy! I mean, yes-yes Rachel is my good friend and I-I have lovedher in the past, but now, she is just my wife! Phoebe, will you-will you help meout here?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Well, I thought you loved her when you-when you married her.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 We were drunk! I wouldve married uh, Joey with that amount ofalcohol!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey! You could do a lot worse than Joey Tribbiani!! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	  Look, Im sorry, but you guys are wrong. I justdont want to be divorced three times.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Yes, and now hes using this three divorces reason because he wantsto stay married to her because he loves her. I must say, "Well done!" Bravo Meg.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	  Okay! Fine! Fine! If-if this is what you think, forget aboutthe whole three divorce thing! Okay, I-Ill go to my lawyers office right nowand get this marriage annulled! Okay?! Because she means nothing to me! NothNothing!!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Meg	 Okay now I wouldnt date you because you seem a little creepy.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Karin	 I am so attracted to him right now.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Okay, when are we gonna tell Rachel what is actually gonna happen?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Soon! I-I just couldnt before. You saw how upset Joey got! Icouldnt do that to her, shes my best friend!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Well, Joeys my best friend.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Im not your best friend?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 You just said Of course youre my best friend. Would youplease tell Rachel though?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 All right, all right, at least Im prepared.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Okay.  Oh yes. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	  Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Hey-hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 These arent for you! Are you upset?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 I am now!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  Hey roomie!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Okay, bye! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Rach, theres something uh, important I have to tell you.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  Are you pregnant?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 No! But, Im throwing this shirt away! I think there was a littlemisunderstanding before.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Um-hmm.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Umm, when I said that uh, that Chandler and I wanted to umm, livetogether we meant alone together.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  Oh my God! Oh, thats funny, I cant believe I didthat.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Oh no sweetie, no! This is my fault, I wasnt clear! Imreally sorry. And listen, you take as much time as you need to move out okay? Theresabsolutely no rush.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Okay. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Okay. Dont you want a cookie?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Sure?  Thanks.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Maybe, do you need a tissue?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Monica, where did you get these?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I made them!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Ooh, good God, theyre so yummy! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 God, its gonna so weird like when I come home and youre nothere. Yknow? No more Joey and Chans. No more J and Cs. "You wannago over to Joey and Chandlers?" "Cant, its not there."
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Look, Im just gonna be across the hall, we can still do all thesame stuff.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Yeah but we wont be able to like get up in the middle of the nightand have those long talks about our feelings and the future.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Not once did we do that.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	  Hi.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Hi.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 So I, I told Rachel it was just gonna be the two of us.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Oh yeah? Well, howd she take it?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Really well. Yeah. Surprisingly well. Yeah, she didnt cry. Shewasnt angry or sad. 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 And youre upset because you didnt make your best friendcry?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I mean, all Im asking for is just a little emotion! Is that toomuch to ask after six years?! I mean what? Are-are-are Rachel and I not as close as youguys?! I mean do we not have as much fun?! Dont I deserve a few tears?!! I meanwe-we told Joey, he cried his eyes out!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Hey! I did not cry my eyes out!! Come on! Its like the end of anera! No more J-man and Channies!! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Chandler	 Okay, I gotta ask, who calls us that?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 You got married again.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Yes.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 So thats your second marriage in two years.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Yes, second in two years. Third overall.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 Ross, I have been a divorce attorney for 23 years and never had I somuch business from one client. Why dont you tell me what happened.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Basically, Rachel and I were in Vegas and we got drunk
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	  Im sorry, is this the same Rachel whos nameyou said at the altar in the second marriage?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Yes-yes-yes! But, I-I do not love her.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 Oh, thats better then.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 This was just a drunken mistake and I need to get it annulled.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 I see. Have you considered therapy?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I think just the annulment for today.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 There are a couple of forms to fill out.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Easy.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 And well need to have witnesses who can testify that you were notof uh, sound mind.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 No problem.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 And well need you and Rachel to testify before a judge.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Ooh! Theres no way to do this without her? Cause I kinda allready told her uh, it was, it was already taken care of.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Russell	 Of course you did. Look Ross, you cant get an annulment unlessyou and Rachel are both there.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Uh-ha, what about someone who looks like Rachel? I will think about the therapy.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Hey!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey. So um, I was thinking that maybe we should start dividing up ourstuff.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Okay!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Yknow, no point in dragging it out. Dragging out the longprocess of you moving out and us not living together anymore.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Okay.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Hey Rach, what about this?  Huh?Who-who gets this? See, I dont know if I want it because it might be yknow,too many memories!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  What the hell is that?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I dont know.  Hey,Rachel, you want the big plate? I want you to have the big plate.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Wow! Mon, thanks! I love this plate!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Something to remember me by!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Mon, honey youre not dying. Im just moving out. Yknow,I mean were gonna see each other all the time.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 But still, its a big change. The end of an era, you might say!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Are you okay? Youre not blinking.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Im fine! I just, Im thinking how much its an end ofera.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, all right. But yknow I gotta say, I dont, I dontthink six years counts as an era.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 An era is defined as a significant period of time. Now, it wassignificant to me, maybe it wasnt significant to you!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 What is the matter with you?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 What is the matter with you?!! Why arent you more upset?!Arent you gonna be sad that were not gonna be living together anymore?! I meanarent you gonna miss me at all?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 All right, fine, but dont get mad at me. Its-its justa little hard to believe.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Whats hard to believe?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Well yknow, its you guys. You-you do this kind of stuff!Yknow? I mean, you-you were gonna get married in Vegas and then you backed out! Iguess Im not upset because I dont see you guys going through with it. Imsorry.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Rachel, its going to happen. Chandler is gonna move in here.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 But I
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 No-no, wait! Just let me finish, okay? This isnt something that wejust, we just impulsively decided in-in Vegas, this is something we both really want. Andit is going to happen.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 It is? Really?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Yeah, sweetie.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	  I mean were not, were notgonna live together anymore?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 No.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 What? Oh my God! Im gonna miss you so much! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 Im gonna miss you! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 I mean its the end of an era!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Monica	 I know!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	  Okay, bye!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh no.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 So? Did you get the annulment?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I couldnt.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 I knew it! Because you love Rachel.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Its not that. Okay? Annulments are more complicated than I
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah, complicated cause of the love.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I I do, I do not love Rachel. Im gonna tell her right nowabout the whole thing so we can get this marriage annulled as fast as possible. Okay?Would I do that if I loved her?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Ive never been more convinced of your love for her.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 I do not have feelings for Rachel! Okay?! 
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Ohh, whats wrong?!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out andeverything is changing.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Oh myCome here! Come here!  Its okay.Everythings gonna be okay.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Rachel	 Thank you.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Ross	 Of course.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 So, Ross and Rachel got married, Monica and Chandler almost got married,do you think you and I should hook up?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh we do, but not just yet.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Really?! Well, when?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 Okay umm, well, first Chandler and Monica will get married and be filthyrich by the way. Yeah. But it wont work out.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Wow.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 I know. Then, Im gonna marry Chandler for the money andyoull marry Rachel and have the beautiful kids.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Great!
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 But then we ditch those two and thats when we get married.Well have Chandlers money and Rachels kids and getting custody will beeasy because of Rachels drinking problem.
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Joey	 Oh-oh, what about Ross?
06	02	0602	The One Where Ross Hugs Rachel	Phoebe	 I dont want to go into the whole thing, but umm, we have words andI kill him.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	  Hey!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding hisbreath for almost four minutes! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	  Dude! What are yoyou trying to kill me?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	  Pheebs, I wanna ask you something.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, what?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Well since Im movin out and-and youre sobeautiful
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Oh!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 how about I move in with you?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Well, that would be great but then what do we do about Denise?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Whos Denise?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 My roommate.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 You have a roommate?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Yes, Denise. Denise! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Hey, what is with the secrecy Phoebe? Huh? And what about this Denise, isshe cute?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Pheebs, I dont understand. How can you have a roommate that noneof us know anything about?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Maybe because you never listen to anything that I say. I talk about herall the time! DENISE!!!!!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Hey Rach, listen I was thinkin uh, Im gonna have an extra roomover at my place
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh, thats true.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Yeah, why dont you move in with me? Itll be great! We couldstay up late, watch movies, and you know about Naked Thursdays right?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah I think Im gonna find my own place.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Hey-hey! I thought Naked Thursdays was just our thing man!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Hey.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Hey!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 So, what did Rachel say when you told her you were still married to her?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Oh, that. Umm, she took it really well.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 You didnt tell her did you?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 No. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Of course not, because youre in love with her.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 I am not in love with her. She was very upset about having to move out soI eh, didnt tell her we were still married because she would only get more upset.I-I just comforted her, as a friend.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 What do you mean, comforted her?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Its nothing, I just gave her a hug.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Ah-ha! A classic sign of love, the hug!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Its also a sign of friendship.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Yeah, not in your case Lovey Loverson. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  It was a hug!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Okay, just tell me this, did you or did you not smell her hair?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 S-s-smell her hair? What if I did?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Ninety percent of a womens pheromones come out the top of herhead! Thats why, thats why women are shorter. So that men will fall in lovewhen they hug them!  Oh come on Ross, youre ascientist. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 I was hugging her as a friend. Its not my fault her-her hair got inmy face, shes got a lot of it and it smells all-all uhcoconutty.  What?! Oh, that doesnt mean I have feelings for Rachel! Maybeit means I have feelings for coconuts!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	  Okay, whatever you say. But just be careful, allright? Rachels not in the same place you are.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  If the place you are referring too is being inlove, then she is in the same place as me because I am not in that place!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Okay, I didnt understand that, but yknow, maybe thatscause you were speaking the secret language of love! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Hey!  Dude, some guy just called for you.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Who was it?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 I dont know! How about, "Thanks for taking the message."Jeez! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Okay listen, yknow when you move in Rachels room is gonna beempty, you wanna talk about what we want to do with it?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Sure!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Okay, I was thinking we should have a beautiful guest room, right? Witha mahogany sleigh bed and bedside tables with flowers on them all the time! And we couldhave a roll top desk with comment cards on them so people could say how much they lovedstaying here!! Okay, whatever, I really havent thought about it that much.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Well, I like that idea. Obviously! I was thinking maybe-maybe-maybe itcould be a game room, yknow? I mean you can buy old arcade games like uh, like SpaceInvaders and Asteroids for $200, the real ones! The big-big ones!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 No.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Okay so you mean no as in, "Gee Chandler, what an interestingidea. Lets discuss it before we reject it completely."
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Oh, Im sorry. Of course I mean that. Interesting idea, umm, talkabout it, but no.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 So, thats it?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 I just dont think arcade games go in the beautiful guest room. Thebeautiful guest room is gonna be filled with antiques.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Which is why Asteroids is perfect! Its the oldest game!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 What do you have against the beautiful guest room?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 I dont have anything against the beautiful guest room,especially since everybody we know lives about 30 seconds away!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Are you mocking me?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 No, Im not mocking you,  or you beautifulguest room. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Hey, whats up?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Nothing, Monica and I had a stupid fight.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 But youre still moving in together, right? Because my ad came outtoday. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	  "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker,non-ugly." Nice!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Yeah? I just figured yknow, after living with you itd be aninteresting change of pace to have a female roommate, yknow? Someone I can learnfrom, someone-someone whos different than me. And whats more different thanme; a guy whos not 19 than say a girl who is 19? Enh? Not just a hat rack my friend!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Pheebs, I have to ask you
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Shhhhhh! Im swamped right now.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Youre just staring into space.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Umm, Im trying to move that pencil. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 This one? 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 It worked!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! Every place Ican afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. I mean, look at this;  "Wanted. Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly." Itsjust, there is nothing! The citys full!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Wait, no, look at this!   "Two bedroom,two bath, must be non-smoker, Satan worshipers okay" Oh, yeah, but its onthe ground floor.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  Hey!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Hey.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Rach, uh, you still looking for a place?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Yeah! Why?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Okay, theres this guy, Warren, from the museum and hes goingon a dig for like two years and hes got this great place he needs to sublet. So uh,you interested?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 That sounds great! Id love to live at Warrens!! I loveWarren! Thank you!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Dont thank me! If you wanna thank something, thank the volcano thaterupted thousands of years ago, killing but perfectly preserving an entire civilization. Heres Warrens number.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh, this is great! I am gonna call him right now!  Oh, thankyou! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Okay, you go grab it!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 I saw it.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 I dont know what youre talking about.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Umm, Im talking about that which you already know but wontadmit. You love her again; you re-love her!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Look, I do not re-love her.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 I cant believe you wont just admit it!  Okay, justpromise me that you wont do anything stupid.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Look, were just friends now! Okay? Why would I do anything stupid?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	  Ugh!!! Well, the apartment is alreadysubletted! I mean, this is just hopeless. Im never gonna find anything.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 You can live with me.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 What?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 What?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 What?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh my God! Are you serious?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Uh-huh. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 I would love to live with you Ross; thats-thats great! Thankyou!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Well, Im-Im just glad I could, yknow, help you out.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Wow! Im-Im so happy for you guys.  This is so-so,not stupid.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Ross-Ross, you have no idea what this means to me! I mean, I mean I wasgonna be homeless. You just saved me! Youre my hero!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Hero, I uh, I dont knowwell, all right.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh, I have to go tell Monica what a wonderful brother she has!  
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Oh please!   Youre gonna say things now,arent ya?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 No. No, I wont. But I should tell you this, this exact same thinghappened to my roommate Denise. She moved in with a guy who was secretly married to herand he said he didnt love her, but he really did, and it just blew up! Andthats how she ended up living with me!   Okay,thats a lie.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Hi.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Hi.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Hi, listen, Im sorry about before. I dont need to have agame room. I mean when I was a kid I only played those games because I couldnt getgirls, and now I can emNow, I have you.  Not-notthat I think that I have you or think of you as property in any sort of way, I seewomen
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Stop it Chandler.  Im sorry too.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Really?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Yeah! Oh yes!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Ohh.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Listen, we dont have to make that a guest room, we can think ofsomething to do with the room together.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Thats a great idea! We can easily think of a way for usboth to enjoy the room.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Totally!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 We dont have to come up with this now.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Oh good.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Hey, yknow what? Why dont we think about changes we canmake in the living room?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Changes?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Yeah, I mean were gonna have to move around some furniture tomake room for my chair. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Youre-youre-youre gonna bring the Barca Lounger overhere?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Is that a problem?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Well, its a set and they should probably stay together.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Oh, thats cool. Then Ill just bring them both over.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 See now-now youre taking them away from their home.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Okay, I get it. So, I get nothing! Nothing here is mine! Everythinghere is yours! Ill get up in the morning put on your clothes, and head off to work!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Yeah-yeah, yknow what? Yeah, thats it-thats it,everything will be mine! Nothing will be yours! Thats-thats what I said! Ohcome on, Chandler! Im talking about the barca lounger! It just, it doesntmatch! Where is it gonna go?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 In the game room!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Look it is not my fault that your chairs are incredibly ugly!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 All right! Thats fine! Thats fine! I wont bring overthe chairs! I wont bring anything over! I wouldnt want to ruin the ambianceover here at Grandmas place!! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	  Everything onyour application looks really goodOhh! Just one last question umm, are you and yourfriends gonna be over here all the time like partying and hanging out?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 Oh dont worry, Im not really a party girl.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Whoa!! Now look, dont be just blurtin stuff out. I want you toreally think about your answers. Okay?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	  You can call off the roommate search!  Hi! Ill be living here. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Oh dont listen to him, hes just some guy who really wants theapartment, but I dont think hes gonna get it.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Why did you take the shower curtain down?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 That thing was a hazard!  Im very safetyconscious.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Hey!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Hey! Oh listen, I was just clearing some space for your stuff.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monicas and she and Chandlerhad a big fight and theyre not moving in.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 What do you mean, theyre not moving in? They-theyre stillmoving in right?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 No-no, they just had a big blowout over what to do with my room.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 What?! Over a stupid room!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Yeah, I feel kinda bad for them, but Im also really psychedcause I dont have to move in here!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Oh no, yeah no, that parts great!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Whats all this about you guys fighting?! Is this really over aroom?! I mean, that is so silly!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Ross, we can handle this.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Well, apparently not, and I cant just stand by and watch two peopleI care about very much be hurt over something that is so silly. I mean, enough of thesilliness!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Well, why dont you tell her to stop being silly! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  Okay-okay! Two very good points, look Ive known youboth a long time, and Ive never seen either of you one/millionth as happy asyouve been since youve got together. Do you really want to throw that all awayover a room? That is so silly. Now wh-what is more important, love or silliness?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Well, we are fond of the silliness, but we also have a soft spot forthe love.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Love is the best medicine.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Thats laughter.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Why do you do it?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 I dont know.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Okay! All right! Now, Chandler you-you wanna live with Monica, right?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Yeah, I do.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 And Mon, you wanna live with Chandler, dont ya?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Yes.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  Good! A verbal contract is binding in the state of New York!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Gunther	 So I understand youre looking for a place.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 No-no, Im staying put.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Gunther	 Oh, I was going to offer you my apartment.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Why, where are you going?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Gunther	 I dont know.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  Hey Rach!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Hi!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Youre never gonna believe it uh, Monica and Chandler are moving inagain. Thats great news rightI mean for them. Right?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Oh wow.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Yeah but, on the bright side, we get to be roommates again.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Yeah. Yknow umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I reallyappreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but dont you think itsgonna be weird?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Wh-why?! Why-why-why would it, why would it be weird?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Well, because of us! Because of our history.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 No!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 No?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 No! No! It would be weird if we were still in that place, I mean are youstill in that place?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 No! Not at all!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Good! Me neither! So its not a problem. Were just two friendswho happen to be roommates.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Okay, but Ross, eventually you and I are gonna be dating.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Really?! We are?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Yeah! Im gonna have a boyfriend, youre gonna have agirlfriend
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Ohh! That would be great.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 But yknow what, if you think its gonna be okay welljust work out a system. Yknow, itll be like college, Ill hang a hangeron the door and put a sign, "Come back later, Im gettin lucky."
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  Yeah, I didnt think ofthat.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 So are you sure about this whole moving in thing?! I mean its a reallybig step! And-and whats the rush?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Thats very funny!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Hes being silly, because he knows that we enjoy the silliness!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 No, I-I-Im serious, okay? I mean, think about it. You move in, youstart fighting over stupid game rooms, next thing yknow you break up!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Ross, you were right before, it was just a stupid fight about a room.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Okay, there are no stupid fights!! This isnt about the room, this isabout what the roomrepresents! And unfortunately, this room  could destroy you!!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm not so worried.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Yeah, no, me neither.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Fine! Its your life!  I just dont want to see you guys break up! Which you will do if youmove in together,  but thats what you want,theres nothing I can do.  DONT DOIT!!!!! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 You still want to move in together right?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Of course!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Ross didnt scare you?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Scared me out of ever wanting to live with him.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Come here, I want to show you something!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Okay!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Oh my God! Someones killed Square Man!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 This is where I thought the barca lounger could go! You see you couldsee the TV and its still walking distance to the kitchen.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Oh thats so sweet! I want to show you something too!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Okay!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Yknow those big-big uh, road signs that say "Merge?"
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Uh-hmm.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Yknow? So I was thinking that we could get one of those signsand hang it over our bed. Because, thats you and I together! Merge!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Oh my God! I love that!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Chandler	 Really?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Monica	 Uh, no!!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	  I found you in my bed! 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	 Now if you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then pleasegive me money so I can buy a computer.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	  So umm, where are the other guys?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Umm, well lets see Monica and Chandler are occupied.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Fighting?!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 No, the other thing. I really think its great they work thingsout.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Yeah. Theres no breaking them up, is there?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Hey, can I borrow the key to your house so I can run across the streetand make a copy?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Sure! Here. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Thank you.  Now are you sure? Because once I make a copy,theres no turning back.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Yeah, Im-Im sure.  Yeah, get out of here before Ichange my mind. 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Umm, listen, Ross do you really think this moving in with Rachel is a goodidea?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Ive been back and forth.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Yeah well, maybe you should go back! Okay? Rachel moves in, and before youknow it youre right where you dont want to be! Back together!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Ehh, I dont, I dont think so. Shes already talked aboutyknow, dating other guys.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Thats not gonna work out! Then shes gonna come home all weepyand youll be tellin her, "Oh thats okay. Youll findsomeone." And then, bamn! She finds you!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Yeah, well, m-maybe youre right.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 I am telling you Ross, she is definitely gonna fall in love with youagain! Now, is that what you want?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Is that what I want?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Phoebe	  Yes.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Here she comes. Hold on, Im gonna make your life much easier.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 All right, well the place was closed. Ill just copy it later.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Or not. Uh, Rach, why dont you just move in with me? 
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Ross	 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa, Joey!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no Its okay, I mean Ilook Rach, Iknow I scared you off with that whole Naked Thursdays thing, but we dont haveto do that!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Rachel	 Well, it would be easier to move just right across the hall. Wait aminute, unless youre thinking about Naked Wednesdays.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Thursdays clearly not good for ya, pick a day!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	  Hi!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 Hi!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Come in. Thanks for comin back, umm, okay there have been a lot ofpeople interested in the room, but I have narrowed it down and you are one of thefinalists!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 Great!
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Okay now, before I make my final decision I uh, I just want to make sureour personalities match. Okay, so I made up a little test. Now, Im gonna say a wordand then you say the first thing that comes to mind.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 I can do that.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Okay! Here we go. Pillow.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 Fight.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Very good! Okay. G.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 String?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Excellent! Okay umm, doggy.
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	The Potential Roommate	 Kitten?
06	03	0603	The One With Ross's Denial	Joey	 Ooh, sorry! No-no-no, so close though, butbye-bye! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 So, which of this kitchen stuff is mine?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 This bottle opener. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 And?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 And its a magnet!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Look at that!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 How weird is that? Yknow? Youre moving in with me and have theone thing I dont have. Its like uh, in a way you-you complete me kitchen.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 What?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  You complete me kitchen, matey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Ross, I know what youre thinking.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 What?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 That shes gonna move in with you and maybe then shell fallin love with you and then when she finds out youre already married, shell justbe happy. Yknow? Youre just, youre very sad.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 OhmyGod! I-I see what this is! You are in love withRachel!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 What?!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Of course! It all adds up! I mean you youre obsessed with her.Its always, "Ross, what are you gonna do about Rachel?" "Ross,why-why are you moving in with Rachel?" "When are you gonna confess your secretmarriage to Rachel?" You want her!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 No! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Uh-oh, saved by the bell.  Hello?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Hey Rach, arent these candlesticks  mine?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 No-no, I bought those.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Ohh! Yeah, I forgot.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	  That youre a liar. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  No-no-no, thats great! Ill be there Monday. Andthank you again!  Okay.   Umm, that was the head of thePaleontology department at N uh, Y, uh U!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Wow! Uh what, did he uh, say?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Well remember that paper I had published last year on sediment flow rate,huh? They loved it. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Well, who wouldnt?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 I know! Anyway, they asked me to be a guest lecturer! I mean itstemporary, but uh, if they like me it could lead to a full time job. How great would thatlook great on a mailbox, huh? "Professor Geller."
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Yeah, Professor and Mrs.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 And Mrs.?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Oh! Yeah, yknow you and Ross are still married.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 What?!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Just kidding!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Ohh! Oh God!  
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	  Saved your ass.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Hi.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Oh, whats the matter?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Well, you know that psychic I see?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Yeah?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Well, she told me that Im gonna die this week, so Im kindabummed about that.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 What?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Yeah, and I know you guys dont know a lot about psychic readings,but that one is pretty much the worse one you can get.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Phoebe thats crazy!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 I cant believe she would say that too you.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah honey you dont believe her do you?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 I dontshe said yknow that Id have triplets! Butshe also said one of them would be black.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Just out of curiosity did she tell you how youre gonna go?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 No, cause she didnt tell me I was gonna die until the veryend of the session, and I was not gonna waste a whole another hour there! I mean Iveonly got a week left, yknow? Ive really gotta start living now! , leans back, andstarts reading.)
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Hey everyone!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Oh hi!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Hey uh, well, todays my first lecture and I kinda wanted to try itout on you guys, do you, do you mind?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	All	 Oh thatd be great. Sure!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 "There are three primary theories concerning sediment flow rate. Each of thesetheories can be further subcategorized into two distinct"
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Oh, this is it. This whats gonna kill me.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  "subcategories. The first of these subcategoriesis"
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Uh Ross! Are there uh, are there naked chicks on thatpiece of paper?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 No! Why?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Well, Ive just never seen a guy stare so hard at a piece of paperthat didnt have naked chicks on it.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Ohh! Okay! Okay.  "Thereare three  primary theories concerning sediment flow rate.  Each ofthese theories  can be further subcategorized into"
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Why dont you open with a joke?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Open with a joke? Its a university, not a comedy club!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not talking aboutChuckles University?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Okay!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	All	 Ohh! Were kidding! Oh, were kidding!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Thank you!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Some uh, some visual aides.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Oh-ooh-ooh! Yknow whats a good visual aide?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Please dont say naked chicks.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Why not?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 I-I-I dont even know why I bother to talk to you guys about it.Yknow what? Im just gonna do it on my own with no naked chicks.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Thats the way I did it til I was 19.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Hey.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hey! Any good mail?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Yes, you got something from the Screen Actors Guild.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Ooh, its probably a residual check, hey can you open it for me,Im kinda.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	  "Benefits lapsed."
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hmm thats weird. I dont remember being in a move calledbenefits lapsed.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Okay, its not a check. Theyre saying your health insuranceexpired because, you didnt work enough last year.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Let me see that!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 All right.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Oh, I cant believe this! This sucks! When I had insuranceI could get hit by a bus or catch on fire, yknow? And it wouldnt matter. Now Igotta be careful?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Im sorry man, theres never a good time to  stopcatching on fire.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 All right well, I guess I gotta go get a job. Im gonna go see myagent.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Okay, make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  look both ways before you cross thestreet. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Hey Pheebs, youre still alive! How are you doing?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Ugh, its so exhausting waiting for death. Ohh, by the way,do you think you could
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Pheebs, what-what are you doing?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 I was preparing you for mydidnt you think I was dead? Didthat not come off?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Oh yeah, scared the hell out of me. I thought wed lost youforever. Pheebs, you lie down?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Yeah, thanks. And listen, can you do me a favor? Could you just umm,wake me up in a couple hours, yknow if you can.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Monica!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Hmm? 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Did-did you take these back?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 No-no, I-I just, I liked them so much that I went out and bought somefor myself.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Oh yeah, theyre really great! Arent they?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 I loved them!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah.  Nice try! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Hello!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Howd the lecture go?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 It went great! And I didnt need any jokes or naked chicks either!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Wow, thats great Ross, Im sorry we werent moresupportive before.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 I knew all I had to do was let the material speak for itself.Everyones all, "Ross you have to be funny and sexy." Well, I proved themwrong! And now, Im gonna pass the news onto Joey and Chandler.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 That youre not funny or sexy?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Thats right!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Hey Estelle, listen
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Estelle	 Well! Well! Well! Joey Tribbiani! So you came back huh? They thinkthey can do better but they all come crawling back to Estelle!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 What are you talkin about? I never left you! Youve always beenmy agent!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Estelle	 Really?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yeah!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Estelle	 Oh well, no harm, no foul.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Estelle, you gotta get me some work. I-I lost my health insurance.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Estelle	 All right, first thing we gotta do, damage control.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Why?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Estelle	 Well, I think uhh, someone out there may have been bad mouthing you allover town.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Bastard!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Hey! So Estelle lined up a bunch of auditions for metomorrow and Ill have my health insurance back in no time.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Thats great, but shouldnt you be on the toilet right now?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 What?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Whats wrong with you?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I was liftingweights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand up since. Butum, I dont think its anything serious.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-you go to the doctor!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anythingits gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Thats a hernia.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Why did I have to start working out again?  Damn you 15s!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Well, were a little early, the lecture doesnt end for 15minutes.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Yeah, but yknow we could sneak in and watch.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah, we could. Oh hey look! Theres some Kappa Kappa Deltas! I wasa Kappa.  Hey sisters!   Wow, we really are bitches.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Right! So when Rigby got his samples back from thelaboratory he made a startling discovery! What he believed to be igneous, was in factsedimentary. Imagine his consternation when Oh bloody hell.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 What the hell are you doing?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Look, I was nervous! You guys had me all worried I was going to be boring!I got up there and they were all like staring at me. I opened my mouth and this Britishaccent just came out.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah, and not a very good one.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Will you-will you please?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Professor	 Dr. Geller, Kurt Rathman, Im a professor in thepaleontology department here.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Oh.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Professor	 Do you have a moment to talk about your lecture?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Im sorry, Ive got plans with mysister.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	  Monica Gellerrr. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Right, will you excuse us for one moment?   What are you doing?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	  Oh, you can have an accent and I cant?!  Top O the morning to ya laddies!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Just please stop!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	  Yes, yes, Bombay is bery, bery nice time of year.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Hey, will you grab me a cruller? Sit down! Will you go to the hospital?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Dude! Hernia operations cost like, a lot probably. Besides itsgetting darker and more painful, that means its healing.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 I will loan you the money. Just go to the hospital and lets justget that thingpushed back in.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Thank you, but it would take me forever to pay you that money back and Idont want that hanging over my head. Okay? Besides, as soon as my insurance kicks inI can get all the free operations I want! Yeah, Im thinking Ill probably startwith that laser eye surgery too.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Hey.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Whats going on?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Oh Joeys got a really bad hernia, but thats nothing alittle laser eye surgery wont fix!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Look, Im telling you if I put my hand on my stomach right here  it doesnt hurt that bad.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Hey! Maybe youll die!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Sure, now Im scared.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 No, we can go together! Just dont wait too long though, okay?Cause Im outta here sometime before Friday.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yeah, but I dont wanna die!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 No-no, itll be fun! We can come back and we can haunt these guys!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Gimme em!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 No! They are mine!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 You stole them from me!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 You stole them from me!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Gimme them!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 You just wanna each take one?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah that seems fair. We never use them.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Look, I really need some help, okay? Why? Why did I have tospeak in a British accent?! What do I do?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Well
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Why dont you phase it out? Yeah, fade the accent out and peoplewill think youre, yknow, that youre adjusting to life in America.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Yeah, I mean, come on Ross, no one will even notice. I mean theyreprobably not even listening!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Theyre not listening too me?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Of course theyre listening to you! Everybody listens to you.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	 Monica you really think I should try this phasing out thing?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 I think you look fine.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #1	 Whenever youre ready.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Okay. "Hey, Timmy, Ive got asurprise for you."
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #1	 Hold it. Im sorry, the surprise is a new swing set,if you could play it a little lessintense?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Oh yeah, sure, no problem, Ill justhold on one second.  "Hey Timmy, Ive got a surprise for you!"
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #1	 Oh my God!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 So thats why I feed my dog Purina One! Pick up a bag today!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #2	 Thats where you pick up the bag.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Exactly.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #2	 No, the line is pick a bag, so you need to pick up the bag.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Or, I could just point to it! Huh? Blah, blah, blah, Purina One,point to a bag today.  I didnt get it, did I?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #2	 No.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yeah, okay. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hi. Im Joey Tribbiani; Im here to audition for  man.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Casting Director #3	 You mean dying man?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yes!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Okay, come on, do it one more time!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Really? Really?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Monica	 Yes!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Okay!  "Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, wed like youto come on board with us full time! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	  Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Listen to this! My reading was wrong, Im not going die!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Really?! How do you know?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Because my psychic is dead! She mustve read the cards wrong!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Eh, better her than me! Hey, lets bake cookies!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Listen, Im really glad you got the part.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Thank you.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 But are you sure you can do this?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yeah! And hey, thanks for coming with me. And thanks again for helping metake a shower.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Now, is that never talking about it again?!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  Hiya!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Hey Joey, were ready for ya!  Joey, thisis Alex hes going to be playing your son.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hi Alex!  And uh, as you can see my hands are not in mypants. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Okay.  All right uh, Alex now when Joey says his line,"Take good care of your Momma son," thats your cue to cry. Got it?  All right, lets do this.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	A Crew Member	  Scene 5, take 1.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 And Action!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 "Take could care of your Momma son."  "Take could care ofyour Momma son."  "Come on son! Your Mommas goodpeople!"
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Cut! Alex, remember youre supposed to cry. Can you cry forus this time?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Alex	 Okay.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 All right, from the top.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	A Crew Member	 Scene 5, take 2.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	A Crew Member	 Take 36 is up!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 All right! Lets try this again! You ready Joe?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Ah, just one thing umm, is it all right with you if I, if I scream rightup until you say action?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Uh sure.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Okay. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Action!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	  "Take good care of your Mommason." 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	The Director	 Cut!!!!!!!!!! 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Im sorry! Hey-hey Joe, why dont you uh, lift up yourshirt?  Take a look at this kiddo.  Wehave a crying child! Roll the damn cameras!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	  Hello? 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Russell	  Hello, is Ross there?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Uh no, hes not. Can I take a message?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Russell	 Yes, this Russell, Rosss divorce lawyer, just tell him that sinceI havent heard from him, I assume hes decided to give the marriage a try.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Ross got married againNooooooo!!!!!!!!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  All right, keep going. We are phasing the accent out,phasing it out. So without out re-testing the results in the laboratory  the team would never have identified  the initial errors intheir carbon dating analysis . Were there any questions at this point?  Yes. 
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	A Student	 Whats happening to your accent?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Come again? Whats-whats this nonsense?  All right, Im-Im not English. Im from Long Island. I wasreally nervous and the accent just uh, just came out. Im sorry. So, if we could justget back to the lecture. Umm, were there any questions? About paleontology.  All right, look I was just trying tomake a good first impression. Obviously, I screwed up. But what you guys think of me isreally important because Im-Im hoping to get a permanent job here. So if youjust give me another chance to make a good impression
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Rachel	 Ross!! Are you crazy?! I am still your wife!! What, were you justnever gonna tell me?!! What the hell is wrong with you?!!!! Ugh, I could just kill you!!!!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Ross	  Well, hello Rachel!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Have you really done this before?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! You just take a big, big swing. Now, dont holdback.  and Phoebe picks up a woodenbaseball bat and starts to swing as Chandler and Monica enter.)
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey!
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 What are you doing?
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Phoebe	 Were just celebrating that Joey got his health insurance back.
06	04	0604	The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance	Chandler	 Oh, all right.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 I cannot believe that you didnt tell me that we are stillmarried!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Look I was going to tell you!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 When?! After the birth of our first secret child?!  Rossdidnt get the annulment; we are still married.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 What?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Youre kidding!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	  Oh my God!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Ross!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay, maybe it wasnt my best decision. But I just couldnt faceanother failed marriage.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Okay, let me just jump in and ask, at what point did you think thiswas a successful marriage?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Rach, come on, if you think about it, its actually kinda funny.  Okay, maybe its best not to think about it.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Okay, this is inexcusable. I am shocked to my very core!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Phoebe, I told her you already knew.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Another lie. You have a sickness!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Ross, just for my own piece of mind, youre not married toanymore of us are ya?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Oh! Hey, somebody left their keys.  Ooohh, to a Porsche! Hey Gunther,these yours?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Gunther	 Yeah, thats what I drive. I make four bucks an hour, I saved upfor 350 years!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Na-uh!  Hey did anybody lose their keys?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Joey, why dont you put them in the lost and found?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Theres a lost and found?  Myshoe! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 You left a shoe here?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Well, I didnt realize until I got home. I wasnt gonna walk allthe way back down here with one shoe! Yknow what? Im gonna go find thatguys car and leave a note on the windshield. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Oh good, when he comes back for his keys, Ill be sure to givehim your shoe.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Great! Thanks. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	  Oh, good, good, you guys are here! Listen,how would like to spend tomorrow taking care of three incredibly cute little puppies?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Oh my God, what a fun day! That sounds great!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	  Yeah, all right.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Okay, well Ill bring them by tomorrow morning. Okay, and uh, bythe way, theyre not actually puppies, theyre Frank and Alices triplets.Okay, see ya! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! What?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	  Please! Please! Please! Please! Oh please! Please! Please! Frankand Alice asked me to baby sit the triplets and Im nervous cause Ivenever done that before by myself!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Dont worry about it Phoebe, well absolutely do it.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Yeah, Im gonna pass. Cause I was kinda iffy when it waspuppies.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Come on Chandler, come on! Itll give us great practice forwhenpeople with babies cometo visit.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Guy #1	 Nice car!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Yeah, its not mine.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Woman	  I love your car.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Yeah, its  mine.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Woman	 I bet its fast.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Me too! Yeah. And comfortable. Do uh, do you like leather seats?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Woman	 Yeah!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	  Its got em!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 So, I still have boxes here. I still have boxes at Rosss, andI have nowhere to live! Wow. I could so easily freak out right now.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 What about me? I just found out that Denise is leaving town for a while,I dont have a roommate.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, maybe-maybe I could be your roommate Pheebs.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Maybe you could be my roommate!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well theres an idea!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Yeah!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 That would be great! Wait, how long is Denise gone for?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Umm, she said shed be back December 26th. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 December 26th, huh maybe shes Santa Clause.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	  Oh look who it is, my husband. The apple of my eye.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay, I got us a court date for tomorrow at 2:00 and I picked up all theforms. Ill take care of everything.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well sure, if you say youre gonna take care of everything I haveno reason to doubt you. Give me those forms!  All right, nowIm gonna do this my way and I dont want to hear a peep out of you!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay Rach, but
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Op! Youre peeping!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Ross! Yknow what, I just gotwhy? Why did you do this?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Look I told you
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 I dont wanna hear "Three failed marriages!"
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Look, if youd had two failed marriages, youd understand!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, yknow what? Thanks to you Im half way there! Ugh! Oh!I am so mad! Ross, I dont think I have ever been this angry!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 What about the time I said we were on a break?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Ugh! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Pheebs, hows it going?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	  Im doing okay. I think its going well. Do youthink theyre having fun? Am I talking to fast?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Nope, sound like me. Pheebs, its going great. Look at Chandlerwith little baby girl Chandler.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Little baby girl Chandler, where I have heard that before? Oh right,Coach Ruben.  Do you know what Pheebs? When youre done over there, we kinda have asituation over here too. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Na-uh, no, we are all responsible for our own babies.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 See thats where I think that youre wrong. Weve beenplaying these babies man for man; we should really be playing a zone defense.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 What do you mean?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 I just think that things would go a lot smoother if we each have ourown zone. Phoebe, you can be in charge of wiping. And yknow Mon, you can be incharge of diapering and I can be in charge of looking how cute they are when they puttheir hands around 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 That sounds really great, but maybe you should be in charge of wiping.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Okay, Im a rookie. I should not be in the end zone.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 This is so great! This is exactly how we set the plates at therestaurant.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Yeah?  Well this is not what I ordered.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	  Hey guys!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Hey!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Hey babies! Oh, Im having the best morning. That uh, that PorscheIve got the keys too, still there!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Shocking! Since you still have the keys.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 You should see the treatment I get when Im with that car! People arefriendly; they-they wanna talk, and not just about the car! One guy gave me advice aboutmy equity investments.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 What equity investments?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 The ones that got me the Porsche! Will you keep up!  But Ifigured, if-if people keep seeing me just standing there, theyre gonna start tothink that I dont own it. So I figured Ill wash it. Right? Monica, you got abucket and some soap I can borrow?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Oh yeah, I got soap and sponges and rags and Carnuba wax and polishingcompound.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 You dont even have a car!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 I know. But umm, one time there was this really dirty car in front ofthe building, so I washed it.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 And?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 And six others.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 There you are.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Yeah, she tops out at 130.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Guy #2	 Wow!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 And thats just in the city. I get her up to 160 when I take herupstate.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Guy #2	 Really! You got a place upstate?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Sure!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Guy #2	 Well, Ill see you later.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Okay, take it easy.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 Hey! Thats my car.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Really? Oh uh, oh just give me five more minutes with it.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 What-what are you doing?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Oh I-I uh, found the keys and now Im just polishing her up.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 But its my car!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Yeah, but its my wax.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 Listen, I-I-I dont come to this city much so Idont know if youre crazy or this is some kind of street theater, but could Ihave my keys.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Sure. Here.  Ill uh, save your parking spot.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 Im not coming back.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Why not?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	The Porsche Owner	 I live upstate.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Yeah, so did I.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 I dont know why I was so nervous about this. And I dont knowwhy Frank and Alice are always complaining. This is so easy.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Yeah, two hours, a lifetime thats the same.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	  Check it out! Check it out! When the babies wake up, theycan meet Krog! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Chandler, what are you doing? That thing can put someones eye out!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 He can do more than that! He can destroy the universe!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 No Chandler, they can swallow one of those little parts! And also, lookat his smooth area, thats just gonna mess them up.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Theyre not gonna swallow anything, you guys are being way overprotective. When I was a kid, my mom used to just throw me into a pile of broken glass!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 What?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Glass, sand, whatever. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Oh, look at little Leslie stretching in her sleep.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Oh its so cute. I wonder what age it is when you stop being ableto put both legs over your head.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Oh, I can still do that.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 How are you still single?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	  All right.  I thought about it and maybeyoure right. Maybe Krog is not a safe toy.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Good. What made you change your mind?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 I swallowed the sonic blaster gun.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 How did that happen?!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Well, I was trying to prove that I was right. Yknow? And itturns out I was wrong. And now its lodged in my throat.  
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Damnit! Yknow this whole time we were concentrating on watchingthe babies and, and no one was watching Chandler! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Okay you two are asking the court for an annulment?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Yes your honor, and here are, are forms, all filled out.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 So based on your petition you are seeking an annulment on the groundsthat Mr. Geller is mentally unstable.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Fine, Im mentally unstable.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 And based on the fact that Mr. Geller is intravenous drug user.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 What?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Uh yes, heroin and crack.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Crack isnt even an intravenous drug!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, you would know.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Now it also says here that you lied about your sexual preference beforemarriage?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Oh, come on!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	  Ross, please, I found the magazines!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 And finally that you were unable to consummate the marriage. Well, thatmakes sense since youre gay and addicted to heroin.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay, Im sorry, this is insane! I-I-Im not addicted to heroin,Im not gay, and there is no problem with my ability to consummate anything!Look, Ill consummate this marriage right here, right now!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 That wont be necessary.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 And when we were dating we consummated like bunnies!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Ugh!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Now if you were two involved in a serious relationship, that reallycreates a problem.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Ross! Your honor, rest assured relationship ended like two years ago! And could you strike "Consummated like bunnies" from therecord?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Is there, anything in this record that is actually true?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, yes, we got married in Vegas and uh, and the names I think.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Well, based on what I heard, you two certainly dont qualify for anannulment. If you two dont want to be together youll have to file for divorce.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	  Thats great! Are you happy now? Look what you did withyour funny, funny form!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	  What?! Me?! What about you and your consummated likebunnies nonsense!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 And whatWhat are youtyping that for? Did you hear what she said? We dont get the annulment. Donttype that! What?! Stop typing!  Hey! Stop typing! Stop typing! Stop typing!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	  Okay, do you see, do you see what youre keeping memarried too?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 You need to get out of my chambers.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 All right look lady here is the deal, I came here for an annulment and Iam not leaving here until I get one!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Yeah!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Judge	 Would you like to spend the night in jail?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 And thank you for your time. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	  So the Porsche guy took hiscar back.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 But you found the keys to his clothes?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 No. No, I just uh, I just loved the way it feels when everybody thinks Iown a Porsche.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 And people will think you own a Porsche because youre wearing theclothes?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Of course! Only an idiot would wear this stuff if you didnt have thecar! Right?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 That is true.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Yeah, but only a genius would swallow a sonic blaster gun.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Oh, Ive been there. Yeah, I am gonna go drive my Porsche. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Joey, you know you dont actually have one.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Come on! What are you doing?! Im in character! Would you talk toher! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Ahh, I think it just moved. Its really poking me.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 All right, thats it, were going to the emergency room.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 What?! No, you cant, you cant leave me here with them!Were baby-sitting! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 The babies are asleep, Im sure youll be okay on your own fora while!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 But you-you cant leave me with them! We-were a team!Were playing a zone! Theyre gonna triple team me!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Hes got something plastic lodged in his throat, weve got togo to the hospital.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 But no, because a doctor wont be able to help him, its justgonna yknow naturally pass through his system in like seven years.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 I think thats gum.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Im pretty sure its gun.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Okay, listen this really hurts. Lets go.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 A real man wouldnt just run to the hospital!  No! What would, what would Krog do? 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Why isnt that valet back with my Porsche?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Passerby	 Maybe because youve got the keys?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	  Porsche.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 This is totally your fault!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 My fault?! You threatened the judge!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, you ripped the paper out of the court reporters machine!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 That was the only way I could get him to stop typing!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Hi! How are the Gellers? 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Dont call us that! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 The judge wouldnt let us get an annulment! Now we gotta get adivorce!! Did a Porsch throw up on you? 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Hey! Its Porsche!! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Me taking care of you is no problem, huh? You guys feel safe. Right?Okay, Im gonna take that spit bubble as, "Yeah, I do!" Okay, after I getrid of this dirty diaper Leslie, Ill set you up with a clean one.  Okay, Im sorry. I didnt mean to scare you. I just have toclean that up. Okay? Cause lets face it, were at Monicas.  I broke it. Allright. Well, thats just the way that goes.  Okay, good.  Why are there only twoof you? Where is Leslie? Well, you cant answer.  Leslie?Where are you Leslie? Leslie, now would be a good time for your first words!  Well, look at you! Hey! You are a little bit mischievous! My gosh!  Oh, youre a lotmischievous! Well, itll dry.   Okay,you sit with your brother and sister nowwho arent there! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	  Hey!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	  How do you feel?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Well, lets just say that Krog will be fully equipped to destroythe universe again in twelve to fourteen hours.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 Okay, so I totally took care of the babies all by myself! I fedem, bathed em, and put em to bed.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 And protected them from a tornado?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Oh my God.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 I know, the babies are asleep.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Phoebe, what, what happened here?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Phoebe	 I did it! I took care of the babies all by myself!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 But my apartment!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Was the setting of Phoebes triumph.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 But the mess!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	 Is not as important as the fact that Phoebe took care of the babiesall by herself.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Monica	 Youre right, youre right I shouldnt freak out.Cause this is what will happen when you and I have babies! When will that be?!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Chandler	  Phoebe, would you take a look at this mess!!!!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	  Oh honey thank God youre home, I was getting worried.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 I picked up the divorce papers. Uh, Ive already signed everythingand I put little Xs where you need to sign.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Oh, little Xs! Great! That makes up for everything!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Yknow, I-Iyouve done a lot of stupid stuff too! Okay?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay, how about you flew to London to stop my wedding! Ah, how about youtold me you loved me after I was already married!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Hey! Wait a minute! That was different! I did those things because I wasin love with you!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Yeah! Right!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Youre right. Thats very different. So lets, letsjust sign the papers. All right?  What?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Nothing. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Okay, can we just sign please?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Uh-hmm. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Congratulations. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Okay Ross, werewait a minute. Umm, I uh, I kinda have alittle confession.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 What?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, yknow this whole marriage thing, kinda my idea.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Excuse me?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night wewere married?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Yeah?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 And uh, yeah, I didnt really, I didnt want to say anything,but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in thecasino and for some reason thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. And uh, and Ithought it would be funnier if we got married. So as a, as a compromise we decided firstto get married, and then  to eat a lot of grapes. So umm, sorry I got usinto this mess.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 So then if-ifI mean if you think about it, this is all  yourfault.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Yeah, dont push it though.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Ive got to say; I know I divorce a lot of women, never thought Iwould be divorcing you.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 I know. I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the onethat stuck. And it wouldnt be a secret, and we wouldnt have our wedding dinnerat Pizza Hut. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Did I, did I even treat?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 No, it was on the house, it was, it was a newlywed special.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 That may be the most depressing thing Ive heard in my life. I shouldprobably get these to my lawyers office.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Hey, thanks Ross, for taking care of all of this.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Eh, no problem.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Rachel	 Im gonna need a copy of those.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Ross	 Totally. 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Hey! Hey! Be careful around my Porsche! 
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Woman	  Hi Joey.
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Hey! How you doin?
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Woman	  He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
06	05	0605	The One With Joey's Porsche	Joey	 Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	  Okay!  Listen, Im gonna be moving out so youwill be in charge of paying the rent.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Right! And when is that due?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 First of the month.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 And thats every month?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 No, just the months you actually want to live here.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Ahhh.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay, here is the phone bill. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	  Oh my God!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Thats our phone number. Now look, I know I kinda sprung thiswhole me moving out on thing, so why dont I justwhy dont I just coveryou for a while?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 No-no! No way! Joey Tribbiani does not take charityanymore.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Its not charity, Joe
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 No! Forget it! OkayI mean thanks, but Im done taking moneyfrom you. All right, I can take of myself. Now, whats next? Come on.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay uh, heres the electric bill. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 This is how much we pay for electric?!!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Uh, yeah.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 So, well do the rest of the bills later then?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 So is Joey going to have to give up the apartment?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 No, I hope not! I tried to offer him some money, but he wouldnttake it.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Well, how much do you think he needs?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 I figure that $1,500 would cover him for a few months, yknow?But I have to trick him into taking it so I wont hurt his pride.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Why dont you hire him as an actor? You could have him dress up andput on little skits. Whatever you want.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Well that would help the pride thing.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Hey!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Hey! Wow! You look great! Wanna move in with me tomorrow?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Okay.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay!  So, what do you girls have planned for tonight?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Well, instead of being sad that tonight is my last night together withRachel we thought wed go out to dinner and celebrate the fact that Rachel is movingin with Phoebe.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 And also, my birthday.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Its not your birthday.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 What a mean thing to say! I would never tell you its notyour birthday!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Hey!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Hey!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Hey!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Hey! So you guys have anything planned for the big last night?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Well, instead of just hanging out, we figure wed do nothing.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, Knicks season opener tonight. I thought maybe you guyswould come over and watch it.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 I dont know Ross, not if youre gonna talk about how you gaveup a career in basketball to become a paleontologist.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 I did give up a career in basketball to become a paleontologist!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	  Pheebs, I was wondering
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Youre not dressed yet?! Were supposed to start having fun in15 minutes!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Well and clearly not a minute sooner.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Rachel, you are packed though right, I mean please tell me thatyoure packed. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Of course I packed! Monica relax! I just wanted to ask Phoebe heropinion on what I should wear tonight.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 My God, I cant get a minute of peace around this place.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Monicas just gonna kill you.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah, I know.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Well, what youre wearing is fine for that.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Rachel, I need to borrowYoure not packed!!!!Youre not packed even a little bit!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Surprise!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 What?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 No, no dont get mad because lookthis is what happened. SoI-I started packing, then I realized, "What am I doing? I am lousy at packing!"Right? But you love packing! So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Ill be coordinator! Oh myGod! Im so sorry, I didnt get you anything! Okay, look everybody has to help!Okay? You can help, cant you Phoebe?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 I have plans.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Youre plans were with us.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Thats right.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 All right, Chandler can make boxes, Ross can wrap, and Joey can liftthings. Now Phoebe, go tell the guys they have to help out!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Okay!  Oh my God, thank you!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Hurry! Monicas gonna make you pack! Shes got jobs foreveryone! Now, its too late for me, but save your selves! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Okay! Themovers will be here in 11 hours. Rachel has not packed. Now, everybody has to help!Chandler, were gonna start with
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Oh nope, I-I have plans with Joey.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 I thought you said you were going to do nothing.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Yes, but for the last time.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Okay fine, now Ross
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Oh, but-but I cant do it.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Why not?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	  Ive got Ben.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Because, because Ive got Ben.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Its almost 8 oclock, its almost past his bedtime.Where-where is he?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Hes at a dinner party.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Is he really coming? Because I can see right into your apartment!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Of course he is! What, do you think Id just use my son as-as anexcuse? What kind of father do you think I am?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 All right, sorry. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	  I gotta go make a fake Ben.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Here it is! Our last pizzas together as roommates.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Oh, I wish Id know you were going to do that, I ordered Chinese.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Oh thats okay. Hey, actually in a way its kinda nice. Me,bringing the food of my ancestors, you, the food of yours!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Say, Joe, I had a strange idea of what we could do for our last night.What do you say we play a little uh, foosball for money?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 What, are you crazy? You havent beaten me once since my injuryplagued 97 season. It would be easier if you just give me your money.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Yes it would. What do you say to $50?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Okay, youre on.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay, lets play! The big game, Italy vs. China, apparently.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Ohhhhhh, look its the roller blades.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Oh God!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 You remember when we got these?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 No.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 I guess you werent there. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 You guys, we said we were gonna have fun! Come on, hey, remember thetime  You dont remember?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Im sorry Pheebs, I guess Im just really said that Imleaving.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Im gonna miss you so much.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Well, this doesnt have to be so sad though. Yknow? Maybeinstead of just thinking about how much youre gonna miss each other, you should likethink of the things youre not gonna miss.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 I dont think theres anything.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Come on, theres gotta be something.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Nope, shes perfect.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 I have one.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Good! Great! You can go first.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Uh well, I guess Im not gonna miss the fact that youre neverallowed to move the phone pen. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Good thats a good one. Okay, Monica, anything? Yknow? DoesRachel move the phone pen?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Aw, sometimes. Always, actually.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Okay, good. There you go. Doesnt anyone feel better?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Not just the phone pen. I never get my messages.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 You get your messages!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Yeah, well I dont think it really counts if you have to read themoff the back of your hand after you fall asleep on the couch.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 So-so, you missed a message from who? Chandler or your mom? Or Chandler?Or your mom?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Great! It worked! No ones sad.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	  Yes! I win again! Ha-ha! Thats like 500 bucks you owe me!Whoo-ho-hoo! $500 that is a loooot of electricity! Whoo-ho-ho!  I gotta buy some food.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay, give me a chance to win my money back. Okay? Sudden death, onegoal, $1,000.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 You serious?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Oh yes!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Okay, get ready to owe me!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Okay, here we go. Ready?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 No! No! No! Noone can beat me.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 See? Now, thats why only the little fake men are supposed to doall the kicking.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Hello?  Oh, hi Ross!  See? Other people call me!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Ooh, your brother. Score!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  Whats up?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Oh, Im just over here with Ben. I thought wed say hi.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Oh, put him on!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Ben, say hi to Aunt Monica.  Oh, I guess he doesnt feel like talking right now.Hes smiling though! Okay, talk to you later.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Yeah, I think it was better when you guys were sad. Hey, uh, rememberthe roller blades?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 You know what else Im not gonna miss? "Im Monica. Iwash the toilet 17 times a day. Even if people are on it!"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 "Hi Im Rachel, is my sweater too tight? No? Oh, Idbetter wash it and shrink it!"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 "Im Monica, I dont get phone messages from interestingpeople. Ever!"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Hey! I call her!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 "Oh my God, I love Ross! I hate Ross! I love Ross! I hateRoss!"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 "Oh my God, I cant find a boyfriend! So I guess Illjust stumble across the hall and sleep with the first guy I find in there!"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Yeah, we should get a move on if we wanna make those dinnerreservations. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Still broken?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 This sucks man! The last night youre here and I lose the two mostimportant things in my life, the foosball table and $500.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Well, there are other ways of winning back your money, how about alittle uh, a little Blackjack? 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Nah, not my game.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay, uh, how about, how aboutyknow what? We could play anew game. A new game, its fun.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Well, whats it called?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Cups.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 I dont know how to play Cups.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Ill teach ya! Come on, come on, its really easy andreally, really fun.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 All right.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay, here you go.  I have two queens,what do you have?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 A two and a five.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Ho-ho, you win! 50 dollars!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Really?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Oh yeah! Okay, lets play again.  What do you got?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 A four and a nine.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Youre kidding right?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 No. Why?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Well thats a full cup! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Damn! I am good at Cups!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Im not talking to her!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Well, one of you has to take the first step! And it should be you,because shes the one whos leaving. Its harder for her!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Well, maybe youre rightShe made fun of my phone pen!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 I know, I took it hard too.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Listen Rachel, I feel really bad aboutWhat are you doing? 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Im unpacking!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 What?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Im not moving!  Is thatpicture straight?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 It needs to go about 20 blocks to the left!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Hey, yknow what? Youre the one who wants to make this bigchange and move in with Chandler! You should be the one to go! Why should I have toleave?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Because its my apartment!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Well its mine too! What else you got?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 How about, youre moving!! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Look! This is ridiculous. We should be packing you!! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Hey, how are you guys doing?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Great! Monicas moving!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	  I am not!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh really?! Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Okay, you guys. You guys I think I know whats going on here. Okay,you guys STOP!!  I know that, I know that youreacting mad because you think that itll make it easier to leave. But deep downyoure still really sad. Deep-deep down.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 No Phoebe I am mad!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Well, deep-deep-deep down!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Yeah, Im just mad!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Then keep running. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 You win.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Well, what did you have?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 It doesnt matter because nothing beats a three and a six. Thatmy friend is D-Cup. Okay, now much have you won so far?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Uh,  wow, 700.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Not 700 exactly?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Yeah.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Double it! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 What?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Well you see in Cups, once you get $700, you have to double it.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Really?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Hey, I didnt make up the rules. Now, after you receive thedoubling bonus, you get uh, one card. Now that one card could be worth $100 bringing yourtotal to 1,500.  Dont get to excited because thats notgonna happen unless you getNo way! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Well, this is the last box of your clothes. Im just gonna labelit, "What were you thinking?"
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that onChandler.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Hey you guys, I dont mean to make things worse, but umm, Idont want to live with Rachel anymore.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica, Rachel	 What?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Youre just so mean to each other! And I dont want to end uplike that with Rachel. I still like you!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Well, Phoebe thats fine because Im not moving.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Yknow I-I-I said somereally bad stuff about her, but yknow Rachel has some good qualities thatmake her a good roommate.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh really? Like what Monica?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Yknow she has 147,000 pairs of boots
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh yeah, good start Mon.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 She lets you borrow them.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Yeah and you stretch em out with your big old clown feet.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Do you wanna live outside?! Because its gettin cold!  She gets tons of catalogs and umm, shell fold down the pages of the thingsshe thinks that Id like.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 What else?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 When I take a shower, she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Yeah, I do. I-I do, do that.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Thats nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 When I fall asleep on the couch after reading, she covers me over with ablanket.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Well yknow, I dont want you to be cold.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she wasreally supportive.   You were so great. You made it so easy. Andnow you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh, its gonna be fine.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Okay Rachel, I cant wait to live with you! And you knowwhat we should do? Bring Monica and then we could all live there together! Well haveso much fun!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 But honey, I think shes moving in with Chandler.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Phoebe	 Oh thats right. Youre still set on that?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Kinda.  Oh my God!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	  Hello?  Hey Mon, hows the packinggoing?  Ben? Hes fine. Yeah, hes rightOh my God!  Get your head of your shirtthere son!  What?  Yeah,its a pumpkin. Ill come pack.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Hey!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Whats wrong?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Ross and I were helping the girls pack, took a little break, I lost $1,500to him in Cups!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Wh-How did you lose at Cups?!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 The same way you lost. I started out with a King and a Queen, bamn! Rossgets a 2 and a 3. Then I get a Jack and a King, boom! Ross gets a 4 and a 5! Ross wasgetting the Cup card, the D-Cup, the Sittin Down Bonus! Meanwhile, I didnteven get half a cup! Nothin!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Oh man!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 And he never played before either! Yknow what I think? I thinkbeginners luck, very important in Cups.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 All right, lets play one more hand! One more!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 No, no, no more! I cannot lose another dime! Im serious this time!In-in fact, look, theres aI wanna give you something. And let me give it tooyou know before I pawn it for Cups money.  Now, I wantyou to have the big white dog as a kinda of a, yknow, thank you for being such agreat roommate.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 I cant take the big white dog! You love it!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Its him, not it!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 No, but waitwhat if I bought it from you, yknow? And yournice gesture would be giving it to me at a reasonable price, say  $1,500?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Wait a second, I see what youre trying to do here! You-youretrying to give me money again!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 When did I try to give you money?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 Over there!  Before, with the bills! You tried togive some charity, I said "No," you dropped it. Okay? Then we had a nice lastnight together, we had some fun, we gambled, nobody tried to give anybody any money! Nowout of the blue, you start with the charity thing again!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Im just trying to help you out! Okay? I wanna make sure thatyoure okay.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Joey	 I will be okay! Look Chandler, you gotta get it out of your headthat I cant take care of myself. Okay? Look, Im not gonna miss you helping meout with money. The only thing that Im gonna missis you. And now the dog.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Hey. Call me when you get there. Okay?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Okay.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Im really gonna miss you.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh! I have your key. Here you go. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Thanks.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Oh God! This is silly, Im gonna see you in a couple of hours! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Yeah.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Bye house!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Rachel	 Bye Mon.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Bye.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	  Hey.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 She really left.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 I know. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Thank you.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 No problem roomie. 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 Can I ask you a question?
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Sure!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Monica	 What the hell is that dog doing here?! 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 I invented the game of Cups as a way to give Joey money.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 And now you want that money back.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Exactly.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Chandler, what kind of an idiot do you take me for? 
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Its not a real game! I made it up!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Im sorry you lost your money, but I won it fair and square.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 At a fake game!!
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 Now, if you wanna try to make some of it back, Id be glad to playyou for it. But I should warn you, I am very good at Cups.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Okay! Now I assume the Saucer card came up when you played last.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Ross	 No.
06	06	0606	The One On The Last Night	Chandler	 Hmm, lets see if it comes up this time. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Ready?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Hi...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 it's...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Rachel...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 and
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Phoebes...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 please...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 leave...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 leave
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Wait, I-I just said "leave." 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know because you have all the good words. What do I get? I get"its," "and" oh I'm sorry, I have "A." Forget it.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Phoebe, come on that's silly.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 All right, so let's switch.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 No, I have all of the good words. OK, fine, fine, we can switch.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Okay.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Hi
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Everybody
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 It's
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Rachel
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 and
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Phoebes
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Please...wait, how did you do that?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 What?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Oh, you're no ordinary roommate are you?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? Cause I wanna go runningbefore it gets dark. Oh! Why don't you come with me?!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Really?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Yeah, it'll be fun. We'll run in the park. It'll be like our firstyknow roommate bonding thing.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Okay, let's go running!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Yeah and there's really cute guys there.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Let's run towards them!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 OK!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 All right, wait just one more second. Hi, it's Phoebe and Rachel's.Please leave a message, thanks! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Now wait a minute. You just took all the words!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. You've met your match Rachel Green.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 So, I just finished this fascinating book. By the year 2030, there'll becomputers that can carry out the same amount of functions as an actual human brain. Sotheoretically you could download your thoughts and memories into this computer and-and-andlive forever as a machine.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	  And I just realized I can sleep with my eyes open.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross, Chandler	 Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	  Honey, that's a great idea nailing the boxes to thefloor!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 I didn't nail the boxes to the floor.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Oh, So you can move them!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yes, and while I'm doing that, Ross has a great computer story foryou. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Hey everybody! Uh, I'd like you to meet Janine. She's-she's gonna be mynew roommate!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Hi.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Hi! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Hi
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Yeah, she's gonna live with me!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 It's nice to meet you. Janine...?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Lecroix. Janine Lecroix
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 I didn't know that! Well, what a pretty last name!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 So, uh, wh-where ya from?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Australia, I just moved here a couple of weeks ago.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  From the land down under? I didn't know that either!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 So uh, wha-uh, what do you do?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 I'm a dancer.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 You're a dancer? She-she's a dancer!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Well, I think I'll go and unpack.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh, hey let me. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Joey, did you even interview this woman before you asked her to move in?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Of course I did.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Uh-huh, what exactly did you ask her?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 "When can you move in?"
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Thank you for bringing her into our lives.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Unbelievable
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Oh, so you like her too Chandler?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Hey, look at all the boxes!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Ugh, I cannot wait to ask her out!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Wait a minute...Joey. Joey you can't ask her out, she's your roommate.It-it'll be way too complicated. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah, yeah man don't do it. I mean if you date her, then-then-then I can'tdate her.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 All right, think about it. Now remember when you were going out withthat girl Donna and you guys broke up. Remember how horrible it was when you guys bumpedinto each other at the supermarket?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh God, yeah.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Now imagine you live at the supermarket.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  Okay!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 No-no
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh, Oh, you're right! I don't want that. I can't date her!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Yeah and you better watch the flirting too, cause you know, in suchclose quarters, it could be trouble.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Well, that's gonna be tough Mon. I mean it's hard for me to be around anattractive woman and not flirt.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	  Hmm, well you're around me all the time and you don't flirt.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 You a little sad about that sweetheart?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 I have to tie my shoe, so you go ahead, I'll catch up.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Okay. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Okay.  Come on! That's not running! Let's go! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 You guys, I'm telling you, when she runs, she looks like a cross betweenKermit The Frog and The Six Million Dollar Man.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Monica had such a crush on him. Yeah, she used to kiss his poster everynight before she went to bed.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Oh! I used to do that too!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Did you also have his album, It's Not Easy Being Green?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Aw, Mon...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 So, Phoebe runs weird huh?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I justdon't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Why don't you just be straight with her? Tell her the truth.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 You're right, you're right. I should just tell her the truth.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Pheebs, Monica tripped me, I don't think I can ever run again, ever!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Why? Why would you do that?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 I don't know. Rachel I'm-I'm sorry that I hurt your ankles.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Ankle.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 We'll see.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 OK, I'm officially unpacked. Thanks for helping me man.  Joe?  Well, I guessJoey went home. Oh and look, there's still one box that I have to unpack. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  I Gotcha!!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	  Oh my God! You-almost-gave-me-a-heart-attack.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Boy, it was so hard not to laugh, I tell ya. Hey, hey, the place looksgreat!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yeah, not bad right? You know what, Monicas gonna be workinglate, so I'm gonna make this place spotless. You know what else I'm gonna do, know whatelse I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go downstairs, I'm gonna get her some flowers. Now whowouldn't wanna live with me?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  I don't! No, I wanna live with the super-hot Australiandancer.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yeah, now how's that going though? Are you okay with the not-flirtingthing?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Yeah. Well, so far yeah. But it's tough you know? I got all this built upflirting energy and I don't know how to get rid of it.  How you doin?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  Ohhhh man
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Sorry, there's just more room out here.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no, it's-it's uh, you just uh, uh reminded me that uh, I needto do my stretches too. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	  Why don't you try to do-
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 What's wrong?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Uh-uh nothing. I-I-I-I didn't want you to touch me cause I'm -I'm allsweaty from the workout. I better hit the shower.  Oh my God!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Oh, sorry about that stuff hanging in there. It's just mythongs are too delicate for the dryer.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	  Hi! Oh yeah, uh-huh, it's me. I saw you grabyour running shoes this morning and sneak out. You lied so you could run by yourself.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 No, no Phoebe no, I was...no. You know what, I was, I was actually justchecking to, see, if I could run. And I can!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Please Rachel, I am not an idiot. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 No, wait Phoebe.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	  Wow, couples who live together do start to look alike. So,Mondler...uh, what uh, what cha doin?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 What does it look like I'm doing? I am cleaning!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Did you get Monica's authorization to move all of her stuff?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Authorization? I don't need that. I'm gonna put everything back.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Put it back exactly where you found it?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yes I'm gonna put it back  exactly where I foundit.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Kay, first of all, this attitude is not helping.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 She's not gonna care if I put her stuff back in the same stupid place.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Whoa, hello, did you just meet Monica?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 She is gonna recognize that I did a nice thing and-and, appreciate it.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Hmm -you know, actually this'll work out well. Cause when you have to moveback in with Joey, Joey's hot new roommate can come and live with me.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 I see, I see, y-y-you're trying to freak me out.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Look Chandler, Monica is really weird about this kind stuff all right.Believe me, I lived with her for 16 years. She is going to freakout. Oh my God,she's going to sit on you.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 No, she's not okay? And I'll prove it to you. I'm gonna call her rightnow.  Phone's done ehh.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	  Hi!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Hey Mon, how's it going?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Terrible. If-if I want something done right, I have to do it myself.Other people just wreck stuff. I really think I might kill someone tonight. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Oh come on, come on, it can't be that bad.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 It's worse. The only thing that's getting me through is knowing that I'mgonna be seeing you soon. I think I may even try to get out of here early.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 No! No-no-no-no-no-no. It sounds like they really need you down there.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	  Well, are you just hanging out with Ross?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 It's, all good! Okay bye-bye Mon!  She's-she's gonna kill me.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah, the phone was facing the other way.  And that goes back up there.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 We should start with the big stuff. Yknow? That'll be theeasiest. Uh, let's start with the couch.  I gotit. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah that-that, doesn't look right.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 What are you talking about? The couch is perfectly in line with thecarpet. And then I can just walk over here and casually just put my feet right up onthe... OK, OK, here'swhat we do, we just uh, move the couch closer to the coffee table.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Whoa, whoa, but then the back of the couch won't line up with he back ofthe carpet.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 OK well here, we'll just move the coffee table closer to the couch.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, but then the coffee table won't be centered in theseating area.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yes, but the coffee table doesn't matchthe...blahebdmsdlkhdyslkd;btyds...Rooosss!!!!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	  Look, what am I gonna do? I'm not flirting but still, I'mdrawing her to me like - like a moth to a flame!  What the hell's going on over here?!?!? Monica's gonna kill you! Look I need your help, I have to dosomething to-to repel this woman! Wait a minute, wait a minute, you guys repel women allthe time. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Hey, I've been married 3 times
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 No-no-no I've seen it happen, you-you get a rapport going with a woman butsomehow you manage to kill it. What's your secret?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Look, we do not repel women OK? That is completely untrue.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Oh no, yes we do my man. Remember when we were back in college and wewent to that spring dance and you walked right up to that girl you liked and you could notstop talking about the Irish potato famine?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah, well what about you? You weren't you know, so hot in college either.After everything he said, he'd go "ba dum bum chessh" 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Yeah, Monica doesn't like that either, Maybe I should stop doing that.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Oh y'know what, girls don't like it when I start talking about science.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 That's not specific to girls.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 This is great, this is great, what else, what else?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Uh, they don't like it when you correct their grammar.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 And they don't like it when you explain why your jokes are funny.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 They don't like it when you keep asking them if they like you.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Man, I'm so lucky I have Monica.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	  I'm never gonna find love again.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Hey Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Sure 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Okay, um, I... All right Phoebe look, Ijust wanted to say that I'm sorry. OK? I handled the situation horribly and I should nothave lied to you. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 So, what should you have done?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Well, I-I should've told you the truth.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Uh-Huh, Which is...?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Well, y'know, the reason I didn't wanna go running with you is becauseum, well y'know the way that you run is a little...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 So?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Well, it's embarrassing. People were looking at us like we were crazy.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Why do you care?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Because they're people.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 But people that you don't know and will never see again.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Yes, but still. They're peoplewith eyes.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Well, I didn't get embarrassed running next to Miss . But no,okay. No, no, I can see why running with me would be embarrassing to you. Yeah, okay.You're uptight.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 I-I am not uptightHey-hey-hey-oh-oh! Listen, I am not uptight,man.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 That's okay Rachel. I'm not judging you; that's just who you are. Me.I'm more free y'know? I run like I did when I was a kid, cause that's the only way it'sfun. Y'know, I mean didnt you ever run so fast you thought your legs were gonna falloff? Y'know, like when you were like running towards the swings or running away fromSatan?  The neighbor's dog.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Okay, is this lamp in the same place?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Who cares? I repel women.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	  No-no-no-no-no-no-no-no!!! You can't come in here!R-r-r-r-Ross is naked.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 What?!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	  What?!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	  I couldn't say that I was naked because she's allowed toosee me naked.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Why does anyone have to be naked?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Why is Ross naked?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 I-I had to show Chandler something?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Naked?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Yeah-yeah I uh, I have a uh, a guy problem.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Is it the same thing that Chandler had?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Look, uh, just come later, we'll get everything squared away and youcan come back later.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Okay, listen, there's still some of Chandler's medicine under the sinkin the bathroom. Bye!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Bye! Thank God
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Dude, what'd you have?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Look, we have no time okay? We must focus. We gotta get everythingback into its original place.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	  The photo album! There were millions of pictures ofthe apartment in the photo album. We just go through it and match everything to thepictures.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 That's perfect! That's brilliant! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 So really, what'd ya have?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Hey Joey, I got some beer for you.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Uh, don't you mean "for whom?"
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Sure, listen I was gonna order some pizza, you wanna share one?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Pizza, heh, its not like I never had that before...ba dum bum cheshhh.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Is there something wrong?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 All right, All right, let's just get this out in the open okay? You'rehot. I'm lovable. Clearly there's a vibe going on between us. But, we're roommates andit's a huge mistake for us to continue down this road.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Joey...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 No, no, no, I'm telling ya. Imagine yourself living in a supermarket andyou will understand okay? So the question is, what do we do?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Well, I don't think there is anything to do. I mean I think you'rereally sweet, but I'm just not interested in you like that.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommateand your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh! I see what happened. It's because I was trying to repel you. Right?Believe me, you'd feel a lot different if I turned it on.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 I don't think so.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh, I do.  How you doin?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 I'm OK
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 What?!?!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 What?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Joey	 Oh dear God!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	  Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Oh honey, I'm so sorry, you were right, this feels great!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Phoebe	 See? And you don't care if people are staring, it's just for a secondcause then you're gone!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Rachel	 Gone! I mean its amazing Pheebs. I feel so free and so graceful.  Hey! Look out for the horse! Sorry! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Is it okay for me to come in now?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Uh-huh
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Why is everything different?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 Bye! 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 No, I don't see anything different other than the fact that the roomgot so much brighter when you came into it. 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Well, the end table is wrong, The couch looks bizarre and don't even getme started on the refrigerator magnets.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Okay look, don't...don't be mad okay? But after I unpacked the boxes Iwanted to do something nice for you, so, I-I-I cleaned the apartment. So I movedeverything around and then I forgot where it, where it went back and I'm sorry, I'm verysorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 It's okay. Chandler, are you afraid of me or something? 
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Do you want me to be afraid of you?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Of course not. I mean gosh, Chandler what you did, it's, it's awonderful thing and I really appreciate it. I know I have this weird thing where I wanteverything to be in the perfect place, but I'd never expect you to worry about that.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Really?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 Of course!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Oh well you're the best. You come here to me.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Monica	 All right, hold on okay? First thing's first.  Okay, now did Ross sit anywhere while he was naked?
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 So it said that by the year 2030, there'll be computers that can carry outthe same number of functions as an actual human brain. So theoretically we could downloadour thoughts and our memories into this computer...
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 ...and live forever as a machine!
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Ross	 That's so Janine, you-you-you know what, do you know we're doing rightnow? You and I, we're interfacing.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Janine	 Yeah, I gotta go.
06	07	0607	The One Where Phoebe Runs	Chandler	 Ba dum bumb cheshhh!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Hey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Hi, my names Chandler. I just moved in next door and I waswondering if you would be interested in battling me in a post-apoplectic world for controlof the galaxies last remaining energy source?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Sure, neighbor come on in.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 So, is Janine around?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Uh, no, shes at dance class.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Can I check out what she did to my room?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Yeah, but, hey look, dont go through her stuff. She gets reallymad.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	  Ohmy God. What is th its like a guy never lived in here. Look, youve gotto be careful. This girl thing is dangerous.  Itsspreading already.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	  It is???
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	  Yeah, is this your pretty pink pillow on thecouch?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 No.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	  Is that your tiny littlebox, thats too small to put anything in?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 No.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 No! Ok, this is not good. You are a guy. Ok? This is a guys place. If youlet this go, youre going to be sitting around with your fingers soaking in stuff.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	  All right, youre right. Ill talk to her.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yes talk to her. Be a man.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Im a man.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Defend yourself.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	  Hmm. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Chandler come on. We have to hem the new dust ruffle.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Be right there sweetums.  A totally differentsituation.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Hey guys.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Hey, how was your breakfast with Hillary?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 It was okay. Shes still kind of depressed because she broke up withher boyfriend.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Ohh, yeah.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Well, is this Hillary your HOT assistant chef Hillary?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Yeah.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 The one that always stares at me when I come in?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 No, the one who looked at you once because you got in her way.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Still I could tell. She was into me.  Well, whydont you set us up?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Ohh, are you setting Ross up with someone? Does she have a wedding dress?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	  Hey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Hey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Rachel?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Im, uhh, making up flyers trying to get new massage clients. So, canI come to Bloomingdales and use the copy machine.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Well, sure, but they might think its kinda weird considering Idont work there anymore.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Oh my God. What happened?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 I-I, got a job at Ralph Lauren.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Well thats great! Congratulations!! 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Yeah.  A year ago..
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	  Youve lasted a whole year. Good for you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 But, Pheebs, you can still use the copy machine where I actually work. But,just come by at lunch so my boss doesnt see you. Cause Kim will just freak out andshe already doesnt like me very much.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Thats weird. I dont think my boss likes me either.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 I dont think mine likes me either.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Maybe its a universal thing?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Or maybe, its because youre hanging around here at 11:30 on aWednesday. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yeah lets head off to work.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 We should go.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Thank you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Sure.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Now you will not believe this. But, I was in the copy room, making copies,and Ralph Lauren came in.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Oh my God. Did you talk to him?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Yeah a little. He seems really nice. Good kisser.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 What? What!?! You kissed him?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Totally.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	  Phoebe are you serious?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Yeah. I was just in there. He introduced himself and the next thing I know,were making out. You know.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Phoebe, I mean, you do know hes married?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 No!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Phoebe
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 What am I supposed to do? Ask every guy I make out with if hesmarried?  No, yeah, I should.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Hey Joey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Hey. Uh, can I talk to you for a second? This, uh, kid in this picture. Doyou, uh, know this kid? Is that like a relative or something?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 No, I just thought it was cute.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Yeah, thats what I was afraid of.. Okay, uhhLook Janine I reallywant you to feel at home here, but some of this new stuff. Itstoo girly.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Ohh. Like what?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Like this.  Pictures of cute babies we dontknow. We..we cant have that.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Joey, its Anne Geddes. Shes a famous artist.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Look I dont know this baby. I dont know if shes a famousartist or not. You know, and I dont want to be a jerk but youre changing toomuch around here.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Well, Im sorry. I just thought Id try to make the place alittle nicer.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Yeah but its too much stuff. You know like, you got the candles and thefoofy schmoofer thing here and over here you got a picture of a watering can.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Well I just thought
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Im sure its a famous watering can, okay. But, come onandwhat is with the really hot stick in the bathroom?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Its a curling iron.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Ohh, well, thats ok then. But, okay my towels for instance. I come into the bathroom here and my towel is not on the floor where keep it. Its up here onsome hook..andsmells different.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Its clean.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Yeah, well, it feels different.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Its dry.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Alright, I can make my peace with the clean dry towelsAlso what is withthese chips you bought?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 No no no no, its potpourri. Youre supposed to smell it. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	  Well thats like summer in a bowl.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Oh, Kim, Hi. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Uhh-huh.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 So you know, II handed in that marketing report and I never got tohear what you thought.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 I didnt read it.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Ahh.SoWowThe spring line, its really going to begreat this year, huh?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Yeah.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 So I hear the Ralph Lauren fooled around with someone in the copy room.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Tell me everything.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Hey guys.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler, Monica	 Hey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Whats up? 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 You knowOh My God.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 What happened to your teeth.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 I whitened them.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	  Really.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Yeah. What do you think.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Well, I think I shouldnt look directly at them.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Come on, seriously.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Ross theyre really, really, really white.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yeah, what was wrong with your oldhuman teeth.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Ahh, I-I did leave the gel on a little longer then it said to.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 How much longer?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 A-A day.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Ross you know that tonight is your date with Hillary?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 I know. Thats why I did it.  Come on, are they reallythat bad?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 No, no no no. Youll be fine.  Hillarysbind, right?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 She will be after tonight.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yeah. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Oh, hey, hey Rach, do you notice anything..ahh
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Yeah. Your teeth? Yes, I saw them from outside.  You guys are never going to believe this. But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 What???
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Oh my god.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Yeah I know. She ran into him at my office and they justmade out. Andthe craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because I told her about it and she said itwas the best gossip shed heard all year.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 I am proud of all my friends today.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 My God, Rachel, I cant believe Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren.Ohh, Im so jealous. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Hi, Im Chandler. Your live-in boy
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Chandler, please, come on. Look at him. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Oh, I am no women, but that is one tasty dish. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Hey. Here.  Ohh, whos the silver fox?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 That-that is your make out buddy. Dont you recognize him?  Oh wait. Ohh, Phoebe I love you. Kiss me please.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Thats not Ralph Lauren. Sounds like him though.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 What?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Yeah, no, Ralph doesnt look anything like that guy.Hes-hes young and hes got long hair and a beard and a hacky sack.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Oh My God, Phoebe, thats not Ralph Lauren. Thats Kenny the copyguy.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 What?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Oh..Go..Oh..and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. Ifshe finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. Phoebe!!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Why would the copy guy say he was Ralph Lauren?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 To get you to make out with him!!!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Ohhh.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	  Okay, maybe this will make your teethlook less white.  Nope. Okay, colors that dont work are blue,yellow, green, red, black, white, orange, and purple.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 I dont know what Im going to do. That date starts in like anhour.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Hey Ross, maybe if your skin was lighter. Your teeth wouldnt look sobright.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Oh great. So all I need to do is get some new skin. Thank you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Im just saying, if we put just a little bit of makeup on you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Whoa. Whoa. Whoa. Were not 13 anymore.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Ross this is the only thing left that has a shot at working.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 But, wont she notice I have makeup on?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Please. Half the guys out there have makeup on.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 What??
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 All right, half the people. I mean, just try it and see.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 No. I am not putting on makeup. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Hello. Oh good. Ross could you put up some of these flyers for me?  OH!! Demon!! Demon!!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Now are drawers will smell nice and we didnt waste these pantyhose.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yes, God forbid we throw out old underwear. You-you know what? Imgoing to go over to Joeys.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Wait, were supposed to organize the wrapping paper drawer.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Yes, but I feel like Ive really gotten in touch with my feminineside enough today. You know. In fact I think were two sachets away from becoming alesbian couple.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 You know what? This has been kind of a girlie day. Youre right,Im sorry.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Nah, Nah, its okay. I feel like I need to be in guy place. Youknow, do kind of like a man thing.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Yeah. Go over to Joeys. Go over to Joeys and drink some beerand hammer up some drywall.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 You know when guys hang out they dont just drink some beer andhammer up drywall?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 When girls hang out, we dont have pillow fights in our underwear. Im sorry. We do. We do. I dont knowwhy I said that.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Hey Chandler. Come on in. Were knitting pot holders.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 No thanks, Josephine.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Hey Ross, I was wondering if Oh my God!! Where areall the men???
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Ohh, hi, Kim.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Hi Rachel.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Yeah, remember that thing I told you that happened yesterday? Well itdidnt happen.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 You didnt cancel the fabric order from Taiwan?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Okay, two things didnt happen. Remember I told you that someone madeout with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? Well, it turns out thats not true.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Thats not true?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 No.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Oh thats interesting? Because I checked and only one keycard was used toaccess the copy machine yesterday during lunch and that keycard belonged to you, Rachel.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Oh no, no, no. Oh God, you think I made out with him.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Listen to me. If you think sleeping with Ralph is going to get you my job. Youare sadly mistaken.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 I-I dont want your job. I-I dont. Ohh this is such a mistake. Idid not make out with him. Nobody made out with him. I did not use my keycard yesterday. Idont even know how to use my keycard. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Hi Ralph.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ralph Lauren	: Hi Kim. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Yeah, nothing happen. You could cut the sexual tension in here with a knife.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 And after that, what could I do except become a chef.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mmm-Hmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 And someday soon, I hope to open my own restaurant.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 You know, youre a really great listener. Most guys I go out with,they just talk and talk.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mm-Hmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 After a while its like, shut your mouth, you know?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	  Hmm-Hmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Ive probably been talking too much. Why dont we talk about youa little bit?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mmm-Unmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Come on. I want to know.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Hmm-Hmm-Hmm.  Okay. I, uh, am fromLong Island. I-I came to the city for college. Um, I, um, have a 5 year old son and in myspare time I like to read spy novels. But, but, lets talk more about you. Hmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 So whats really neat. If you sear the stems of the flowers first in afrying pan, your arrangement will look fresh much longer.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Oh my God, Joey, that is such a great tip.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Monica, could you excuse us for a second? I need to talk to the girl withthe flowers.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Monica	 Okay. Oh but Joey, come over later because Im going to teach you tomake a bird feeder out of just a pine cone and some peanut butter.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Ohh, I love birds. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 What is the matter with you ?!?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 What?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Youre arranging flowers!  Yougot dead flowers! You got a picture, a picture, of a baby dressed like flowers! This isnot Joey!!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Hey. Hey look I am still Joey, okay. Flowers theyre just, you know,theyre nice to look at. And that happens to be a picture by a famous artist. Of afamous baby.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Youre turning into a women.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Chandler	 Now Ive upset you? What did I say?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Its not what you said. Its the way you said it.Oh My God,Im a women!!!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Now, she thinks that I made out with him and I did it to get her job.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 But why didnt you just tell her the truth.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 I did but she doesnt think anyone would be stupid enough to confuseKenny the copy guy with Ralph Lauren.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Well, hey, what if Kenny were the real brains behind the whole company? Youknow. What if Kenny hired that Ralph Lauren guy to be the pretty front man? Huh, did sheever think of that?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 You were with Kenny today, werent you?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Just for a second.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Ohh, Phoebe, what am I going to do?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Well, the only thing you can do. Sleep with Ralph Lauren.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Im not going to sleep with Ralph Lauren. I mean, I could, but Iwouldnt.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Ohh, sleep with Kenny.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 That wouldnt help me.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Phoebe	 Ohh, yes it would.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Ive had a really good time tonight.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 You know, I rarely connect with someone this much on the first date.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	  Hmm-Hmm-Hmm. Me, neither. Ive had a really good time too, you know. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Are you going to eat that bread?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	  Ohh, I just like the smell.  Mmmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	  You make me laugh.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Hmm-Hmm.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Would you like to move over to the couch?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Mmm-Hmm. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Maybe Ill just turn the lights down a little.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	  How about all the way.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Okay. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	  Wow, cool poster. Or should I say groovy poster? So,ahh, where were we?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Are those your teeth??
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Ohh, you can see them, huh?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Yes. Theyre insanely white.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 I-I, did that for you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Hillary	 Whats a matter with you?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ross	 Whats a matter with me? Youve got a black light. Its 1999!
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Kim, hi.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Hi Rachel. Ohh, Ive been meaning to ask you. Have you seen the new RalphLauren sheets? Ohh, what am I thinking. Of course you have.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Okay..Okay.. Look. Im sorry that I lied to you before. You wereright. Ralph and I were an item but were not anymore.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Oh, really?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	  Yeah, he dumped me. He said, "Rachel, I cant dothis. Even though you are a very, very, very beautiful women. I cant do this.Im married and Im sorry." And then I dont know why but he said,"and you will never get promoted. Especially not above Kim, who is an integral cog inthe Ralph Lauren machine."
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 You expect me to believe.. Hi Ralph.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Ralph Lauren	: Hi Kim. 
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Oh my God. He just gave you the coldest look I have ever seen. Its likehe hates you. Then it is true.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 Of course its true and it hurts so bad.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Ohh honey come here.  Ohh it will be ok. Weve all beenthere.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Rachel	 You and Ralph?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Kim	 Kenny the copyboy.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Hey.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Hey, uhh, I need to talk to you.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Whats the matter? Are you upset?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 Im sorry but weve got to get rid of all this girlie stuff inhere. I, uh, I got to be a man! Okay. The living room has to remain a guy place, okay?Thats just the way it has to be.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Well, if thats what you want. Ill just put it all in my room.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 GreatGreatand thanks for being so understanding. I mean, Ididnt want to make a big deal out of this, you know.  You could, uh, put the picture of the famous baby in my room. I mean, ifyou want to.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Okay.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 And, uhh, maybe the watering can there.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Sure.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	 And a couple of these little tiny boxes.
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Janine	 Joey? Do you want me to put it all in your room?
06	08	0608	The One With Ross's Teeth	Joey	  Okay.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  Okay, great!  Bye.  Soguess whos coming to Thanksgiving dinner?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Sydney Portier? Hehheh.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  I miss Rachel.  No, myparents.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Oh! Thats great, they havent seen the place since I movedin!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Yeah, and yknow, if you could not mention to them that we livetogether, that would be great! , I was thinking wewould eat around four.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Why cant I tell them that we livetogether?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Because they dont know were dating.  Do you think we should eat in the kitchen? 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Why havent you told them?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Um, well, I was going to, I-I-I really was. But um, then somewhere, justout of nowhere, I didnt.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Why havent you told them?! Wouldnt they be happy?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  So! Dinner in the kitchen aroundfour! Ill see you then. 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Why wouldnt they be happy?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Well, um, because mainly, um, they dont like you. Im sorry.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 What? What? Why?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Maybe because you used to be aloof, or that youre reallysarcastic, or that, yknow, you joke around all the time. Or that you take off yourclothes and throw them on the couch.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Is this why they dont like me or why you dont like me?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Look, I know that I shouldve told them. I know I shouldntcare what they think. Im sorry. 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Yknow, itll be okay. Itll be okay. Because when theycome over, I will be all charming, I will make them fall in love with me, and thenwell tell em.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 You really think thatll work?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Hey, I can be pretty charming, babe, I won YOU over, didnt I?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  I dont think youll ever get my parentsthat drunk! 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Hey!  Oh, good, Ross! Youre parents like me,right?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Yes, of course they like you!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Well Monica just told me that they dont.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Yeah, they dont like you.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Do you know why?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 I dunno, maybe its because youre really sarcastic. Or maybeits cause you uh-
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Well if people dont know they shouldnt just guess!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 This is great, another Thanksgiving with nothing to give thanks for.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Maybe I could give thanks for you shuttin up, eh?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Maybe I could give thanks by taking my Playstation over to mynew apartment.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Well maybe I love ya.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 .
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	 Hey.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Hey.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	 Hey guys!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  No I dont want toplay video games, Joey!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	 Are you guys going to Chandlers for Thanksgiving?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah, why? Whats up?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	 Well, me and my dancer friends are thinking of doing Thanksgivinguptown. I thought you guys might like to come.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 For real?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	 No, but you should go to Chandlers. Because none of us knows howto cook, well probably just end up drinking all day.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Ye-ye, we go to yours!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Yeah, see, we-we-we have to stop across the hall, because its mysister. But, uh, uh yknow actually, growing up with a sister was nice because itreally helped me understand women. Yeah, you-you should tell your friends that.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Janine	  Okay.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 How you got three women to marry you, Ill never know.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	All	 Hey!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Hey! Hey, Pheebs, check it out. Yeah, for my desert, I have chosen tomake a traditional English truffle!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Wow, that sounds great! And what are you making Monica, in caseRachels dessert is... so good that I eat all of it.Theres none left for anybody else!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Nothing.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  Nothing?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 No, sweetie, I-I trust you.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 So, if-if I mess this up, theres nothing else for dessert?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Youre not gonna mess it up.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Wow, Monica, I love that, you really have faith in me. Thank you.Technical question, how do you know when uh, the butters done?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Well, its done about two minutes before it looks like that.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey, Ross	 Hey!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	All	 Hey!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Oh, ooh the food smells great, Mon!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 And the place looks so nice!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Yeah, hey hey, Happy Thanksgiving everybody!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Happy Thanksgiving!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	The Girls	 Happy Thanksgiving!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Well, this has been great!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 See ya!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Whoa whoa whoa! Wherere you goin?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh, oh, we did say wed stop by this little thing Joeysroommate is having.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Oh, Janine, the really hot dancer girl?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Some would say shes attractive, yes.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 And who else is going to be there?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Uh, some of her friends, yeah.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Her dancer friends?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Yes, all right? All of her hot dancer friends are gonna bethere and theyre gonna be, be drinkin and dancin, and we really wanna go!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Dude, we were good!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Youre not gonna go anywhere, you said you were gonna eat here, andyoure gonna eat here!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Yeah, and-and leaving us to go see hot dancer girls is not veryThanksgivingy.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh, but-but it is, uh, its just like the first Thanksgiving, whenthe Indians and the Pilgrims uh, sat down to dinner.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, and the Indians taught the Pilgrims what it meant to be hot inthe new world!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	 Hello everybody!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 Hi!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	All	 Hi!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Dad . Look! Look who it is itsChandler!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	  Oh yes of course, hello Chandler.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Mr. and Mrs. Geller, you look wonderful, it is great to have you hear,let us take off your coats!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Whoa, snowing out there?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	  No.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 Monica, all this food looks wonderful, you should think about doingthis for a living.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 Ok, I have dandruff. Theres no need to laugh and point.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Dad, Chandler was just laughing at your joke.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 My joke wasnt funny.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Rach, Rach, I just remembered. I had a dream about Mr. Geller lastnight.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Really?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Yeah, I dreamt that he saved me from a burning building and he was sobrave and so strong! And its making me look at him totally differently. Yknow,I mean he used to be just, yknow Jack Geller Monica and Rosss dadand now hes hes Jack Geller, dream hunk."
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 I dunno. Yknow to me hell always be Jack Geller, walksin while youre changing.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Yknow dad, Chandler is one of Rosss very best friends!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Yeah, Ross sure is a great guy, yknow Ive always felt thathow a young man turns out is a reflection on his father.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 I always thought that too. Tell me, what does your father do?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Hes the headliner of a gay burlesque show.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Rach, youre killin us here, will ya serve the dessert already?Those drunken dancers are waiting! 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  Look at it, isnt it beautiful?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, what is it?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Its a truffle. Its got all of these layers. Firsttheres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made fromscratch,  thena little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 W-What was the one right before bananas?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 The beef? Yeah, that was weird to me, too. But then, yknow, Ithought well, theres mincemeat pie, I mean thats an Englishdessert, these people just put very strange things in their food, yknow. Oh! by the way, can I borrow some Rum from your place?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Y-sure!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  And while Im gone dont you boys sneaka taste.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey, Ross	  Okay.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Beef in a dessert?! I- no no no, there is no way!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 I know, and only one layer of jam?! What is up with that?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh my God, the pages are stuck together!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Chandler!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh My God, she-she made half a English Trifle, and half a...SheperdsPie!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Oh man! Now shes gonna start all over! Were never gonnaget to introduce the hot girls to the new world!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 No, no, we will. We just wont tell her she messed up.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Just let her serve the beef-custard thing?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Yeah, itll be like a funny Thanksgiving story!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Vomiting stories arefunny...
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Joey, God, your apartment is like a hundred degrees!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Did-did it make you wanna walk around in your underwear?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 No!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Still not hot enough!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Rachel?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Yeah?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Okay, look at him. Look at those strong hands. Oh what I wouldntgive to be that can of  condensed milk.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Mom, uh, Chandler was just saying how beautiful your sweater is.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	 Oh, thank you Chandler! I just bought it.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Oh, yes. Well its very beautiful. Its cream-colored andtight 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 Whats the matter with him?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	  I think hes stoned again.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  What?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  What?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Dude, I need to talk to you a sec.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Okay, I think I might know why my parents dont like you.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 You do? Why?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Okay, remember, we were young. Hey, Spring break, sophomore year, I gothigh in my bedroom and my parents walked in and smelled it and so I told them that you hadgotten stoned and jumped out the window.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 What?! Why did you do that?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 I dont know, aheh, yours was the first name that-that poppedinto my head, Im Im sorry. I-I didnt think it would matter.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 How could it not matter?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 How was I supposed to know wed end up being friends after college,let alone you-you would be living with my sister?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 What about all that friends forever stuff?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 I dont know, I-I was all high. 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Mom and dad just sent me in here to find out if you were trying to get Ross stoned!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Your parents caught Ross smoking pot in college and he blamed it onme!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Ross, I cant believe youd do that!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 The reason we havent told them were together is becausethey hate me, okay? So will you fix this?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Okay, okay, Ill tell em it wasnt Chandler who got high.Now who should I say it was?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 You! Its not like its a big deal! You-you dont stilldo it or anything!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Alright, alright, now-now who should I say tricked me into doing it?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Dad, please dont pick your teeth out here! Alright, and ifyoure gonna put your feet up, why dont you sit on the-
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Monica, leave him alone!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Will you hurry up? Did you not hear me before when I told youthat all of Janines friends are dancers?! And that theyre going to be drinkingalot!?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  No, I did, but tell me again, because its soromantic.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Well youre whippin so slow! Cant you do it any faster?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Joey! Come on! I dont wanna make any mistakes, alright? This isthe only dessert and if I screw it up everybody's gonna be like Oh, remember thatThanksgiving when Rachel screwed up the trifle?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 So why dont you just let me worry about making the trifle and youjust worry about eating it, alright?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Oh I am!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Ross, if you dont tell them, then I will!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Okay, fine!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Ross! Can I talk to you for a second?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh, uh, can it wait a second Joey? I have to tell my parents something. Noit cant? Okay.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Okay, look, I think we have to tell Rachel she messed up her dessert.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 What?! What is with everybody? Its Thanksgiving, not...Truth-Day!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Look, when everyone eats that...that...Banana-Meat thing, theyre allgonna make fun of her, do you want that?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Okay, okay, well just get everyone to act like they like it.That-that way noone makes fun of her and we still get to go to Sweet Potatoe Pie!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Dude, theyre not objects.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Just kiddin, Ill talk to them, you distract Rach.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Hey Rach, can I talk to you outside for a second?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Okay...
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Whats up, Ross?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 So um...Thanksgiving. The holiday season is upon us, hm? 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Yeah!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 And um...You look nice today.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Oh no. No Ross, dont do this.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 What?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 I just- I dont think us getting back together is a good idea.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Eh?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 I thought this might happen today. Ross, I know the holidays can berough. Yknow? And its probably really hard for you to be alone right now.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Youre alone.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 No, I-I live with Phoebe. I mean youre  alone,alone. And I just-its just not the time for us. Im sorry.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	  Ah well, cant blame aguy for trying!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Oh and  Okay, and uh ifanyone needs help pretending to like it, I learned something in acting class, try uh,rubbing your stomach  or uh, or saying mmm and uh, oh oh!And smiling , okay?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Yeah, Im not gonna pay for those acting classes anymore.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Rachel, there you are! Come on, lets serve that dessert already!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Joey, youre gonna have to stop rushing me, you know what? Youdont get any dessert.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  Really?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 No, Im just kidding I would never do that to you! Okay, everybody,its trifle time!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 So, now, Rach, this is a traditional English trifle, isnt it?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 It sure is.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Wow. So then did you make it with beef or Eggplant?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Beef.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 I cant have any. You know I dont eat meat.  Ohhh no.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Really?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Oh oh oh, wait! You only got whipped cream in there! Ya gotta take abite with all the layers!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Okay.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Op! Wait, you dropped a pea.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Well?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  Mmmm! Its good!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Really? How good? 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Its so good, that I feel really selfish about being the only onewhos eating it, that I think we should have everyone taste how good it is.Especially Ross.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	All	  Mmm.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Yeah, this is so good, thatIm gonna go enjoy it on the balcony so that I can enjoy the view whilst I enjoy mydessert.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	  Ive gotta call my friend Mary and tell her how goodthis is, from Monicas room.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	  Ill help you dial.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  Im gonna go into the bathroom so I can look at itin the mirror, as I eat it.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Okay, now what was that all about? Is it-does it not taste good? Let metry it.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Wha? No no! Ah!   All gone! So good! Maybe Chandler hassome left.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 It tastes like feet!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 I like it.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Are you kidding?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Gooooood.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 ...So a bird just grabbed it, and then tried to fly away with it and,and then just dropped it on the street?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Yes, but if its any consolation, before the bird droppedit, he seemed to enjoy it.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Rachel, come here.  Okay, I was just starting to take my Thanksgiving nap, and I hadanother dream about Jack.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 Oh, Phoebe, do I wanna hear this?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 I dunno, lets see! So, okay, I dreamt that we were gonna getmarried, and he left, becuz he had to go fight a fire. And, um, so okay, I went to a nightclub, and I saw him making out with a girl.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  Oh my God, he dream-cheated on you!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Yeah, but then Jacques Cousteau came and he kicked his ass for betrayingme! It was soo cool! Then, he took me diving and he introduced me to his pet seahorse,who, by the way, was totally coming on to me, and please, that is not gonna happen.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 Boy, Im glad I wore the big belt today.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	 Five minutes ago, a line like that wouldve floored me. Nownothing. Well, not nothing, I am still a woman.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Ross? Lets go.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Oh yeah, about telling Mom and Dad, I was thinking about maybe writing aletter.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Alright, you know what? Thats it. Youve had your chance.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Wha-what?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	  Mom! Dad! Ross smoked pot in college!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr., Mrs. Geller	 What?!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	   You are such a tattletale! Mom,Dad, you remember that-that time you walked in my room and smelled marijuana?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr., Mrs. Geller	 Yes. 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Well I told you it was Chandler who was smoking the pot but it was me.Im sorry.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	 It was you?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 And Dad, yknow that mailman that you got fired? He didntsteal your Playboys! Ross did!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Yeah, well, Hurricane Gloria didnt break the porch swing, Monicadid!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Ross hasnt worked at the museum for a year!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 Monica and Chandler are living together!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Ross married Rachel in Vegas! And got divorced! Again!!!!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Phoebe	  I love Jacques Cousteau!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	  Iwasnt supposed to put beef in the trifle!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	  I wanna gooooooo!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	  Thats alot of information to get in inthirty seconds! Alright Joey, if wanna leave, just leave. Rachel, no you werentsupposed to put beef in the trifle. It did not taste good. Phoebe, Im sorry, but Ithink Jacques Cousteau is dead.  Monica, why you felt you had tohide the fact that you were in an important relationship is beyond me.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 And we kinda figured about the porch swing.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	 Ross, drugs? Divorced? Again?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 What happened son?
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Ross	 I-I uh, I got tricked into all those things!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	 Chandler! Youve been Rosss best friend all these years,stuck by him during the drug problems.  And now youve taken onMonica as well. Well, I dont know what to say. Youre a wonderful human being.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	 Thank you!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mr. Geller	 No! Thank you!  Monica, and Ross! I dont knowwhat Im gonna do about the two of you!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Chandler	  Ill talk to them! 
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Rachel	 You guys! It was bananas, cream, and beef! I-I just cannot believe thatyou ate that so that I wouldnt feel bad!
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Monica	 Well actually, I-I didnt eat mine. Its still in thebathroom.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 No it isnt, I ate that.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Mrs. Geller	  Well we left ours in Monicasbedroom.
06	09	0609	The One Where Ross Got High	Joey	 Nope, got it and I got yours  too. 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Let me ask you, why is everybody using these tiny lights nowadays? Iremember when people used to use big lights.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Thats a good story, Grandpa.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hey
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	All	 Hey
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Wow, Monicas letting other people help decorate her tree! Didsomeone get her drunk again or?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Having a perfectly decorated tree is not what Christmas is about.Its about being with the people that you love.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 That is nice and were done. TADA!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I dunno what it is, it just doesnt quite feel like Christmas tome.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Oh, here.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 See now it feels like Christmas!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	  and thats the story of the dreidle. Now, some peopletrace the Christmas tree back to the Egyptians, who used to bring green palm branches intotheir huts on the shortest day of the year, symbolising lifes triumph over death.And that was like 4000 years ago.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling thisstory.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Hey you guys.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Hey Joe whats up?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 I had to get out of the apartment. Janine is like stretching all over theplace. Yknow, everywhere I look shes like 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I can see why thats hard to resist.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 I like her so much!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Aw, Im sorry sweetie that she doesnt feel the same way.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 I know. And shes so sweet. I just wanna feed her grapes and brushher hair.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 You are aware that shes not a monkey, right?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 I am so over Janine. I mean, yeah, at first I thought she was hot,but now shes like OLD NEWS!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Hey guys!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hi Janine!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 I just got a call to be a dancer on a television special for NewYears Eve. Its called some sort of Dickn Rockn Dickie Eve.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Hold it! Are you talking about Dick Clarks New YearsRocking Eve?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Yeah, thats what I said.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Oh my God! We love that show! I mean Ross and I have been watching itsince I can remember!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Ah, youre still just a little fat girl inside arent you?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Well Im gonna be on it this year. Im gonna be one of theparty people.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Youre gonna be a party person! Those guys rock the most!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Well they said I should bring someone.  Do you wanna be mydance partner?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Totally! I would love to spend New Years with you.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Well actually theyre taping tomorrow. I dont reallyunderstand why.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Oh, well you see how it works is, the part with Dick Clark in TimesSquare is actually live, but they tape some of the party stuff ahead of time. Yeah, not alot of people know that.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Yeah well, do you guys wanna come too?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Are you serious?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 We are there!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 What, what are you laughing at?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Well, I used to date him, but youre still going out with her!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Thanks.  Great so we can all go together! I gottarun. Catch you later!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	All	 Bye!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Bye Janine!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Did she just ask me out on a date?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I dont think so.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 What are you talking about? She just invited him to the biggest party ofthe millennium!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Yeah, but she also invited you and Ross. Yeah, honey, Im sorry,but I dont think that was a romantic thing.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Oh. Maybe. But hey I know how I can find out. Were going to a NewYears Eve party, right? So at midnight, I can kiss her. And if she kisses me back,great! Yknow? But if she says Dude, what the hell are you doing? I cansay It wasnt me, it was New Years!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Well, thats a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in HighSchool, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 It was a dry day.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 We are going to Dick Clarks New Years Rocking Eve!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Oh my God!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Oh my God!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	  Oh my God!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 OK, listen Ive been on sets before, so let me give you a littleadvice, alright? Its a show, but were just dancing, OK? Its no big deal.The important thing to remember  stay cool.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Got it!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Oh my God its just like I dreamed it!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 OK, everyone gather up.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica, Ross	 Scuse us
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Heres whats gonna happen. The musics gonna start,youre gonna dance, were gonna tape, you dont look at the camera. Anyquestions?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Yeah, I have a question. When is this gonna air?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Uh, yeah. Now you guys dance over there, you guys over there, and Iwant you two right around here, and everyone else spread out.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Ross! So when is it gonna air?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Okay, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I can save you time ladies, Im right here.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Yeah, Chandler why dont you take a walk? This doesnt concernyou.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 What? Thats terrible!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 No-no, we do it every year!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Oh well, that makes it not terrible.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 No, yeah, we never find them! Shes always best at us that wilyminx.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Dont worry, were just gonna search here for an hour, themwere gonna go over to Joeys and search, OK?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 No not okay, you cant look for Monicas presents!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 But we have to!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 No, you dont have to, and you cant because I live heretoo.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Well then, you should look with us.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Why?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Chandler, arent you worried about what to get Monica forChristmas?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Oh, thats it?  A great idea!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Chandler, thats not enough. I mean what if she gets you a greatpresent, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And youve just gottenher one great present? I mean thats just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you dothat to her Chandler? Why? Why?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 If I help, we can find em faster!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Thats right!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Ooh ooh, we have a live one!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Oh, its a Macys bag!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Ooh, whos it for?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	  Dear losers, do you really think Id hidepresents under the couch? P.S. Chandler, I knew theyd break you.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Uh-oh. She may be onto us.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 We are so gonna find them this year.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Yknow when you guys said you were gonna go across the hall andlook, you dont, you dont do that every year do you?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 You dont, like go into the back of my closet, and look under mygym bag or anything?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe, Rachel	 No, we never do that
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Because thats where Joey gave me some stuff to store thatIve never seen before in my life! Okay, that did not just happen! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Okay, here comes another camera.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Right. No biggie. Stay loose.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Why do they keep doing that?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 If we wanna get on camera, I think we have to get up on one of thoseplatforms. Theyve been taping those people up there all day.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Right.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hey, whatd you guys do to get up on there?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Girl	 We learned how to dance.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Oh yeah? Well when you learned how to dance did you forget how to put onunderpants?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Yeah!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Hey! Youre a good dancer!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Really?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Yeah, well youd be better if you just loosened your hips a little.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 What do you mean?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Like this.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Thats it, feel the rhythm. Thats better.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Uh-huh.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	  Okay, youre dancing with that girl over there.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no we came together!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 I dont see it.  You are dancing with the tall guyover there. Tall guy, raise your hand! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 No-no hey buddy, please let me dance with that girl, I really like her andI think I have a shot.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Really, ythink so? I dont..
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I couldn't find anything at Joey--Hey-hey, oh hey!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Yeah, we found them. There were in the guest room closet behind somecoats.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Yeah, and you have nothing to worry about 'cos they're all crap!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Those are my gifts, I got them for you.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Ohhh. Thanks Chandler they're great!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Well Chandler, what is this very weird, metal A Z thing?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Those are book ends! That's a great gift!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Oh, okay, I'm sorry, thank you for my azzz. 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Ha!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Make sure you put all that stuff back in the closet, okay?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Yes, okay, oh, by the way, I just gotta say, I think it's really nice ofyou that even after you've moved, you still keep storing that stuff for Joey!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Hey-hey dancer girl! Can I go to the bathroom? I just..  Here we go.  Looking good Gellers!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 We know!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Hey, see that snippy guy over there? Hes the one who decides whogets up on the platform. We should go dance by him.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Okay.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Okay, everybody hold!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Next on the platforms are you two! And  You two!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Excuse me, sir, would it help if I werent wearing underpants?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Monica!  Would it?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Hey! Tall guy! Hey, listen, I wanted to talk to you about that girl thatyoure dancing with.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 Shes nice, huh? To think I almost brought my wife tothis!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, okay. Uh, look buddy, I came with that girl, and I had thisplan to kiss her at the new years countdown  Im trying to win her over, so Iwas wondering if..
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 No I dont think so.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Oh come on man, you can dance with my partner, shes real, uh,mellow!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 Look, are you dating this girl you came with?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Well, I was hoping after tonight that maybe I could you know
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 No, no. Shes fair game if you ask me, sorry buddy!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Alright, alright, hey yknow fair is fair,  if youre right, youre right, what can I say, but hey oh no! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 God! What are you, in second grade?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Hey, now youre the one who wet his pants. 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Man, this sucks! Yknow if Mom and Dad dont see us on TVafter we made them so jealous, I mean, whos gonna be the losers then?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hey, I know whatll get us up on a platform!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 What?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 The routine!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Ross, we havent done the routine since middle school.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hey, when the snippy guy sees the routine, hell wanna buildus our own platform!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Was it really that good?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 We got honourable mention in the brother/sister dance category!Look, its almost fake midnight, do we really have any other choice?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Okay, lets do it. Mom and Dad are gonna be so faced!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 5 6 7 8!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 So, do we really have to ask whos going up on the platformnext?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Oh no! You get up there and do that again exactly like that!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Yes! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	  Make sure you get this, theyre gonna want it forthe bloopers show.  Alright cut! Listen up everyone, when we start againits gonna be the countdown to new years, so I wanna see everybodys excitement.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Tall Guy	 Hey, pal, you have about three seconds to get away from mypartner.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Whats going on over here?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Uh, take a look at the guys pants! I mean, I know you told us toshow excitement, but dont you think he went a little overboard?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Whats the matter with you? Get out of here!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Yeah, take a hike wetpants!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Can you believe this? Were gonna be on the platform for theMillennium moment!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 I know! Hey, you havent been practising the routine, have you?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 No!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Me too!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 Hey, when the music starts up again, I was thinking of maybe goindinto the robot, yknow? 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Ross, I think we should stick to the routine, we dont wanna lookstupid!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Alright were back! Ten seconds left here we go! Ten! Nine!Eight! Seven! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	JoeyS Head	 Okay, it all comes down to this. Whatever happens,happens. Destiny.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	All	 Three, Two, One!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Cut!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 No! Year! Happy No Year!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Director	 Okay, heres where we go to the live shot of Times Square, nicework everyone thats a wrap!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Hey! Look who I found!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Oh, hey guys!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Yknow, birds have a very good sense of direction, and I thoughtmaybe they could help us find where the presents are hidden.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Yes, if the presents are hidden south for the winter.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Or we could just follow your clever jokes  any ideas? No!Didnt think so! Okay, cmon guys, show us where the presents are!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Oh, the duck seems to think that Monica got me garbage! Hmm, I wonderwhat I could get Monica thats as good as garbage?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Hmm, how about my azzz?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Hey, this is hollow.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 What?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 This bench, its hollow! I cant believe I never knew that! Oh, the presents!!!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 No, dont look directly at them!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 What?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Alright, no, we could look at them!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Oh, this ones for me!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Oh, this ones for Chandler. Here.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Oh great!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 And the big ones for me!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Ooh, lets open them!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Okay! Okay! Okay!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Hee hee!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Wait, we cant do this.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe, Rachel	 Why?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 I dont wanna know what Monica got me. Yknow? I mean, look,Im sure she worked really hard at getting you a present, and wanting to surprise me,and you guys are gonna ruin that, and I, look we have to put these back, this is not whatChristmas is about.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Whatever Linus, Im opening mine.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Nobody is opening anything ok? Look, I dont know about you guys,but I wanna see the look on Monicas face when I give her my present, and Imsure she wants to see the look on my face when I get mine. So please, please, can we just,can we put them back?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Will you get us better gifts?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Fine!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Hey guys! You found the presents? Chandler, you let them find thepresents? Great! Do you know how long it took me to find you that water purifier?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Thats what you got me?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Phoebe	 Oh yes, I see what you mean. That look is priceless.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Home sweet home, huh? Nice to, uh, get back to reality. Plus we know howthe New Years gonna go off. I guess theres no reason for all that Y2K panic,yknow? Anyway, gnight!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Joey.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Yeah?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	  3, 2, 1.  Happy New Year.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Oh, yoii. What was that for?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Well, I dont know tonight when they yelled cut and we didntget to kiss, I was really, really, disappointed, and I just, really wanted to kiss you
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Really? In the moment, I really wanted to kiss you too. In the moment.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 In the moment, yeah.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 But only in the moment. So do ya wanna kiss again?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Sure, New Years Eve is only two weeks away. Can you wait?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 No.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Me neither.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 3, 2, 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Janine	 Joey, you dont have to count down every time we kiss.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Joey	 Uh, yeah, okay. Except I sorta felt like I needed a couple of seconds toget ready.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 We were on the platform, ready to dance the world into the newMillennium, and the guy yelled CUT!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Uh, wait, so you guys are telling me you actually did the routine fromeighth grade?
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 Yeah. But of course we had to update it a little bit.  Hey, bythe way, great thinking about catching me!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Rachel	 Cos I was gonna say theres no way you couldve done theend the way you guys did it back then!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 What? We could do it!
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Ross	 I dont know, I mean you were a lot bigger, I mean, strongerback then.
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 I can do it, okay? Come on, lets go. 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica, Ross	 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Monica	 I cant do it! 
06	10	0610	The One With The Routine	Chandler	 Now you do that, youre on TV.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Listen, do you guys think I have a chance with Janine?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Honey, we have been through this before!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah. Dont do this to yourself.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Shes made it pretty clear, it is not going to happen.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Well all right then, I guess I shouldnt get to excited about thefact  that I just kissed her!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 You serious?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Thats great!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Really?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Yeah well, well see.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 You kissed her.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Oh we kissed it up real nice.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 So you kissed her, so what happened after that?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I came over here to tell you guys.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 So shes just waiting over there for ya?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 I gotta go.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Okay. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Im gonna be really late for dance class!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Okay. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Okay, now Im really late. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Okay, Im all right, okay, but hey, could you just leave your lips?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	  Bye.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Bye. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Have you kissed her yet? Its awesome! I could do it forever!Yknow what? She-she kisses better than my mom cooks!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 I am so glad you said cooks.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 I know.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	  Oh hey Rachel, sweetheart? You have got to tell thepost office that you have moved. Okay? We are still getting all your bills and stuff.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh-oh, Pottery Barn!  You can throw the rest away.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Im not your garbage man. Im your mailman.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Monica look! Look-look-look! Here is that table that I ordered. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 You got it from Pottery Barn?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah! Its an apothecary table. Does anyone even know what anapothecary is?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 A pharmacist. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Rach, Phoebe hates Pottery Barn.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I hate Pottery Barn too. They kicked me out of there just because Isat on a bed!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 You took off your pants and climbed under the sheets!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	  I was tired!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Phoebe hates Pottery Barn?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Yeah, she hates all mass produced stuff. She thinks her furniture shouldhave a history, a story behind it.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Well this has story behind it! I mean they had to ship it all the wayfrom the White Plains store.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Its gotta be one of a kind. Yknow like umm, yknow uh,whats that God awful ceramic fruit bowl she has on her counter?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Hey! I made that for her!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 You made pottery?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah! I made it of this fruit bowl I found in the garbage.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Im tellingIf you put that in her apartment youll neverhear the end of it.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Okay fine! Ill-Ill just tell her its an antiqueapothecary table, she doesnt have to know where it came from. Oh! Look at thislittle drawers! Oh look-look it says that it holds 300 CDs.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Ahh, just like the apothecary tables of yore
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 so then the farmer says, "Thats not a cow andyoure not milking it."  
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 I am so glad you guys got together, Chandler and I are always lookingfor a couple to go out with and now we have one!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Look at us, were a couple of couples!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 I had so much fun tonight, and what a great restaurant.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Yeah.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 And Chandler I cant believe I let you pay for this one.  Thanks man.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 So do you guys gonna come over tomorrow? Ill make that pasta thingI was telling you about.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Oh that would be great!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Oh, but hey look, at least let us bring the wine.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Joey, you dont have too!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Nope-op! I insist!  You getthe wine right?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Yeah all right.  Okay, good night guys.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 See ya tomorrow!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Tomorrow!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Cant wait! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 How are we gonna get out of that one?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 What?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 I cant handle two nights in a row with them.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 What-whats wrong with Monica and Chandler?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 I dont know, theyre just a little blah!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Blah?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Well yknow, hes blah, shes justshes veryloud for such a small person.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Uh, theyre like my best friends. Are you saying we cant hangout with them? Cause that would kinda be a problem.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 No! Of course we can still hang out with them. Just yknow, not twonights in a row. Okay?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I guess.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Thank you. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 If you want, Ill sell my friends and use the money to buy youpresents.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  Ooh, what a great table! Where-where did you get it?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Guess!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Umm, a flea market?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ha! See, I knew, I knew youd get it on the first guess. Isntit cool! Its an apothecary table.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Wow! Oh you can just imagine that this is where  they kept all the stuff to make their potions.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ohh, yes.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Yknow? Ooh, you can almost smell the opium.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Almost.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 How much was it?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 It was only 500 bucks.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 500 bucks at a flea market?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh, okay see I thought, I thought you meant how much was it when it wasnew, yknow like back then.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Oh no.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah no, I mean it was at a flea market, so it was yknow, it waslike a dollar.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 A dollar?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 And fifty. So it was like one and fifty dollars.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Ohh, okay, they gave you the old time pricing.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Well, what period is it from?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Uh, its from yore. Like the days of yore. Yknow?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Yes, yes I do. God, oh its just perfect! Wow! I bet it has a greatstory behind it too. Did they tell you anything? Like yknow where it was fromor
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yes! That I know, this is from White Plains.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  White Plains. Oh, it sounds like such a magical place.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Hey! Were here!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	  Ohh! Oh my God!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 You like it? 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh no!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Its my new apothecary table!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ross! Phoebes gonna be here any second, she cannot see this!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Well why not?! Shell-shell love it! Its the real thing!I got it at Pottery Barn.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 I know you did! I bought the same one! And if she sees your tableshes gonna know that I lied to her. I told her ours was an original.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Why did you do that?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Because she hates Pottery Barn.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 She hates Pottery Barn?!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 I know! I know, she says its all mass-produced, nothing isauthentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff.  So comeon, shes gonna be here any second! Can we please just cover this up with something?!Please?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 What? No! No! I am not gonna hide it from PhoebeOoh, although I didget some great Pottery Barn sheets! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ooo! Oh, I forgot they made sheets!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Uh, yeah! I still cant believe she hates Pottery Barn!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ross, get over it! Its not like she hates you.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Yeah but Pottery Barn! Yknow what I think? Its justshe-shes weird. Yknow its because shes a twin. Twins are weird.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ross, shes not weird, she just wants her stuff to be one of akind.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Huh. Yknow whats not one of a kind? A twin!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ooh, Phoebes here! Okay, lets turn out all the lights andwell just watch the movie!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Okay. HeyOoh, cool sheets!  
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Oh, you like it? You wanna know where I got it? 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Sure!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 He got it a flea market!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 You bought your sheets at a flea market? Ross come on, you gotta loosenthe purse strings a little.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Hi!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 The dinner will be ready in twenty minutes. This is so exciting.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 And here is the bottle of wine for you to bring over tonight.  You were also going to buy Monica flowers but you couldnt afford it,because you paid dinner last night.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Thanks. Thanks, but uh actually its just gonna be me again tonight.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 What happened to Janine?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Oh, shes uh-uh really sick.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Oh thats too bad.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah, shes been in there all day , uh highfever, a nose problem Phlegm! Phlegm! Phlegm-phlegm-phlegm!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	  Monica! Chandler! Im really-really sorryabout tonight. I dont know if Joey told you; I just couldnt get out of goingto this play. Im sorry. Have a great time.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Kay!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Bye. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Thats funny, I saw no phlegm.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 No-no, she really is sick!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Then why-why is she going to a play?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Uh, yknow, starve a fever, go to a play for a cold.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Joey! Why is Janine not coming over for dinner?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Well uh, she didnt want to hang out with you guys two nights in arow. Im so sorry.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Well, why does she not want to hang out with us?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Because she uh, she-she thinks that you are blah and that you, Monica, aretoo loud.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  What?!!  What?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 So she was just pretending to have a good time last night? She waslying to our faces?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Ugh, I can not believe this! I mean, who is she to judge us? We couldnot have been nicer to her!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 And I am not blah, I am a hoot!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I know! I know! Come on, please-please you guys, dont-dont bemad. Im sure she just, she just said that stuff because she was nervous and you guysare like my best friends! Yknow? And it was our first date! Plus, shes reallysick!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 No, you shNo you said you made that up!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I know, but dont you think the sick thing is way better than theplay thing?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Eh, theyre both good. I generally just go with, Monicasdrunk again.  
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Come on you guys, come on please-please just give her another chance, huh?Shell come around I promise.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Of course we will, come on we gotta make dinner.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Okay.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  I do not like that woman!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	  I can hear you!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 I am loud!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	All	 Aww! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Thats funny. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, could you please not put your feet up on my newold sheet?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Oh sure!  Noo!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ohh!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 My apothecary table!!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 What?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Noooooo!!  
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Ross, where did you get this?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 I got it at Pottery Barn!! Okay?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh my God, Phoebe, Pottery Barn has ripped off the design of ourantique!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Wow! Oh my God, well if theyve ripped off our table ours must bemuch more than one and fifty dollars!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh yes.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Well this doesnt even smell like opium.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Of course not, it smells like wine, which you spilled! And thanks forwrecking my sheet by the way.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Oh Ross, calm down, Ill give you the 80 cents. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Okay, one more time.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Chandler, would you like some more orange juice?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Perfect decibel.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  I know!!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	  Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Hey.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 So uh, what are you guys doing?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Oh nothing, were just talking. Yknow, blah-blah-blah.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Look, come on you guys, you said you were gonna try! All right look, Icame over here to invite you guys to a movie with me and Janine.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Well, Id like to but,  Im not sure wehave time to go.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Ha-ha, very funnyLook! I dont know what to do! I really wantyou guys to get along. Just please come to the movie with us. I mean you owe me!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 We owe you?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Thats right! I helped you guys out a lot in the start of yourrelationship. Huh? I helped you guys sneak around for like six months, and I looked likean idiot! And I was humiliated. And I only made 200 dollars!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 We didnt give you any money! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 You dont think I know that!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 see I cant decide whether it would go better next to the newwicker dining chair, the Sahara desk, or the Parker console table.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Wow! I didnt know that there was a Pottery Barn up here.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 I know, I know. I went a little crazy.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 A little? Your place looks like page 72 of the catalogue. Oh look at that!The ornamental bird cage! Large!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Hey.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  Oh Ross no. Be careful, that is very old! Okay? EarlyColonial bird merchants used to bring their birds to market in that.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	  Fascinating.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	  Another amazing find! Wow! Oh I bet this has a great story too!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh it does, it does! It is a room separating apparatus from Colonialtimes.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Ah!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hmm, a lot of this stuff is from Colonial times. Hey, what are some othertime periods Rachel? 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Well theres yore. And uh, yknow, yesteryear.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Yeah no, Im telling you Rachel has such a great eye for thisstuff. Ross, yknow if you ever decide you need to redecorateAnd I think thatyou should. You should, you should ask Rachel to help.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh honey he doesnt need my help.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Oh, come on! I think hes ready to get rid of, what did you callit? The cheap knock-offs and dinosaur junk.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Really?!  Hey, yknow what? Since you have such a greatsense of what I need, uh ooh, heres-heres 60 bucks, why dont you takePhoebe down to that Colonial flea market of yours and get me some stuff.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	  Yknow what? I dont, I dontthink Phoebe really wants to come.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 No! I do want to!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Oh, she does want to.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 She does want to.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Yeah!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Pheebs, I dont know what to say. I guess the flea market was justbetter last time.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Well at least I got these sheets for Ross.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Uck, look at this! Pottery Barn, yuck!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Yeah, yknow what? Dont look at it.  Seriously, dont look at it. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 No! Look-look! Theres the coffee table they stole from us!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Ugh, those bastards! Lets go.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 That fan kinda looks like ours. And the birdcage and thewait asec! This is our exact living room!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 No! No! No! No its not! No its not! Come on! Phoebe, ours istotally different! I mean we dont have the  We dont have thethat lamp! And-and that screen is yknow, onthe other side.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Oh my God. This is where you got all our stuff, Pottery Barn! Ohmy God!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Okay! Okay-okay lookno I did, I just wanted this stuff and I knowhow you feel about Pottery Barn. Just Come on dont be mad.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 No-no-no, but I am mad! I am mad! Because this stuff is everything thatis wrong with the world! And its all sitting up in my living room and all I canthink about is how I dont have that lamp!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Well then honey, buy the lamp! Hey, we have that 60 bucks from Ross.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 I cant! I cant! Unless Well are you saying that-thatyou would move out if-if I didnt buy that lamp?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 What?! No! Im not gonna move out!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 But are you saying that you would move out if I didnt buy thatlamp?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	  Oh. Yes! I would so move out!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 Okay then I dont have a choice! I have to buy that lamp!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Rachel	 Thats right!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Phoebe	 But at least the apothecary table is real.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Well, this-this-this was great. Didnt everybody have a great time?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Well I did. I really did. And you guys, Ive got to say, Imsorry if I was a little weird after the last time we went out. I guess I was just nervousor something.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Thats totally understandable.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Dont worry about it.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 So we can go out again?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Oh yeah!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Absolutely!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Oh good.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Oh well then, good night!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Good night! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 See? Eh, wasnt that fun?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 We have got to move!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  I knew it!! Yknow, youre not so quietyourself, missy!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 And Im blah? Listen, the only thing more boring than watchingmodern dance is having to listen to you talk about it,  "Oh Chandler,I just lost myself in the moment."
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Yknow, I know youre talking, but all I hear is, "Blah.Blah. Blah-blah-blah."
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  All right! You and me! Lets go! Rightnow!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 All right! All right! Enough! Enough! Enough!! Enough!  You two go home! I-I-I gotta talk to Janine! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	  Yknow I think you can take her.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  Youd better hope I dont see you in the hallway!!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 All right, uh, weve got a little bit of a problem here. These peopleare my friends; you cant treat them that way.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 They said stuff to me too, yknow!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 I know! I know! And Im going to talk to them about it. They mean somuch to me. They Theyre like my family. If you guys are gonna be fighting allthe time, I-I I dont think we can be together. It just, it just cantwork. It cant.  Im very upset.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Okay. Okay. Would, would it help if I went over and apologized?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah! That would be very helpful! Yeah. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 What did I tell you about the hall?!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 I was just coming over here to apologize for my behavior! Idreally like it if we could be friends.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Well, I know that would make Joey happy, so, I would like that too.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Great.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Now come on.  Well, Im glad we worked thingsout.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Me too.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Okay.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Ill see you.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 Bye. 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	  Or Ill hear you.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  Thats it big girl!  Come on!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Janine	 Wait! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	  Youd better run! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Did you hear that?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah uh, what am I gonna do?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Yeah, Im sorry man.  You wanna go watch?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah! 
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Hey!
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 How ya doin?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 Hey so, did uh, did she move out?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Pretty much, yeah.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Monica	 I cannot believe you broke up with her just like that.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Well, when its not right, you know it.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Chandler	 You okay?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah. Ill be all right.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Yknow what would cheer you up?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	 What?
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Ross	 Im giving this lecture on erosion theories tomorrow night, I thinkyou should come.
06	11	0611	The One With The Apothecary Table	Joey	  Youre right! That did cheer me up!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Hey, youre not going to believe this. I made up a joke and sent itin to Playboy. They printed it!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 I didnt know Playboy prints jokes.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yeah, they print jokes, interviews, hard-hitting journalism. Its notjust about the pictures.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 That didnt work on mom, its not going to work on us.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	  Here, check it out. Its the firstone, too.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 That is funny. It was also funny when I made it up.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 What?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 I made that joke up.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Uh, oh-oh, no you didnt. I did.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yes, I did. I told it to Dan at work, and he said it was the funniestjoke hed ever heard.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Hey, tell Dan, Thanks.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 What?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Im sorry, I was just reading the joke below it. Man, that one isfunny. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Monica, you remember me telling you that joke, right?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 No.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Seriously?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Well, you tell a lot of jokes!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Look, Chandler, its my joke. But, hey, if it makes you feel anybetter they dont print the name, so it doesnt really matter who gets credit,right?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yeah, I guess.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	  Hey guys.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Hey, Joey, Playboyprinted my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 No, its my joke, its mine. You can call them, theylltell you.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Its my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Its my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa. Jokes? You guys know they have naked chicks in there,right?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Dude, you have got to turn on Behind the Music. The band Heartis having a really tough time, and I think they may break up.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Lets go watch it at your place.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Nah, Monicas watching some cooking show. Come on, I dontwant to miss when they were skinny.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Chandler, Chandler, yknow what we should do? You and I should go outand get some new sunglasses.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 What? No, I want to watch this. . Did your cable go out?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 No, thats VH-1. I gotta tell you, the music these kids listento today . . . Its like a lotta noise to me. I dont know
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Joey, why is your cable out?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 I uh, oh! Because, uh, I havent really paid the bill
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 If you need money, will you please-please just let me loan you somemoney?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 No, Chandler. Look, forget about it, okay? Look, I know things have been alittle tight since Janine moved out. Oh, was she hot. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Whoa ho.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 I know! Yeah, but, look I can handle it. All right? Look, I can listen tothe radio, huh? And Ross gave me this great book .
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  All right, you want to see if the joke stealerwill let us watch the show at his place?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Sure.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Paid your phonebill?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Not so much.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	  Hey.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  Its only you.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Wh-wh-what are you doing?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 We are looking at a Playboy.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Oh, I want to look too! . Yikes!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 So do you think that these picturesAre, are they trying to tell astory?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, sure. I mean, like in the case of this young woman, she haslost her clothes, so she rides naked on the horse, shes crying out, Where arethey, where are they?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Well, shes not going to find them lying in the grass like that.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah. Aw, remember the days when you used to go out to the barn,lift up your shirt, and bend over?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel, Monica	 Yeah.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 You see, now, I would date this girl. Shes cute, shesoutdoorsy, you know, and she knows how to build a fire. I mean, thats got to come inhandy
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Okay, Ive got a question. If you had to pick one of us to date,who would it be?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	  I dont know.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Me neither.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Rachel.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 What?!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 I dont know.  Me neither.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 You forget how many great songs Heart had.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yeah.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 You know, Barracuda was the first song I learned to play on the keyboard.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 So, you heard it, you repeated it, so that must mean you wrote it.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Oh, you guys, with this joke. I gotta say, I know I cracked up, butIm not even sure I got it.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 What, you didnt get it? The doctor is a monkey.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 And monkeys cant write out prescriptions.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  You are not allowed to laugh at my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Your joke? Well, I think the Hef would disagree, which is whyhe sent me a check for one hundred ah-dollars.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 So, you stole my joke, and you stole my money.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Well, I was going to stick it in the ATM, but now I think Ill showthe sexy teller that I am a published writer.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Well, she is going to know that you stole the joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Oh, what are you going to do, follow me down there?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yeah!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Well, Im not going to go now anyway .
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Okay .
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	  Here you go.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Ah, Gunther, I cant pay for this right now because Im notworking, so Ive had to cut down on some luxuries like uh, payin for stuff.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Well, if you want, you can work here.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Uh, I dont know. Ya see, its just, see I was a regular on asoap opera yknow? And to go from that to this, I just Plus, Id have towait on all my friends.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Okay, but the moneys good, plus you get to stare at Rachel asmuch as you want.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 What?!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Flexible hours.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Maybe I could be a waiter. Could I use the phone?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  She picked Rachel. I mean, she tried to back out of it,but it was obvious. She picked Rachel.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  He took my joke, he took it. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Its wrong. You know what else is wrong? Phoebe picking Rachel.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 You know who else picked Rachel? Ross, and you know what else Rossdid? He stole my joke. You know what? Im going to get a joke journal. Yknow?And document the date and time of every single one of my jokes.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Thats a good idea. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yeah!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Do you know whats a bad idea?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Picking Rachel.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Thats right.  Did you hearsomething?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Maybe its the sound of Ross climbing into my brain and stealingmy thoughts.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Its coming from the living room.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	  I finished my book. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  Hey, you guys.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe, Rachel	 Hey.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  Oh, dont you guys look cute. You guys makesuch a cute couple.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Monica, what are you doing?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  Nothing, Im just trying to recreatesome of the fun that we had at my place the other day.  Remember, when youpicked Rachel over me? That was funny.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 I guess it was kinda funny.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  It wasnt funny at all! Why would you do that?Why didnt you pick me?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Fine. The reason that I was leaning a little bit more toward Rachel thanyou is just that youre  just  kinda high maintenanceOkaylets go to lunch!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 That is completely untrue. You think Im high maintenance? Okay,prove it. I want you to make a list and were going to go through it point by point!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 No, okay, youre right. Youre easy-going. Youre justnot as easy-going as Rachel. Shes just more flexible and-and mellow. Thatsall.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	  Well, people are different.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Ya, you know, Rachel  shell do whatever you want.Yknow, you can just walk all over her.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 What? Wait a minute. What are you saying, that Im a pushover?Im not a pushover.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Oh, okay,  youre not a pushover.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Oh my  you think Im a pushover. Well wait, watch this, youknow what? Youre not invited to lunch. What do you think of that? I thinkthats pretty strong, thats what I think. Come on, Monica, lets go tolunch. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  You start working on that list. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 I cannot believe her.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 I know. Where do you wanna go eat?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Oh, oh, I love that Japanese place.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Im sick of Japanese. Were not going there.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 All right, wherever you wanna go is cool.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 All right.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	  Oh, hey, Gunther, check thisout.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Yeah, that-that Chandler cracks me up. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Hey Ross, listen, you want anything to drink, cause Im headingup there.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Uh, yeah, Ill take a coffee. Thanks, man.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Sure.  Coffee? Cause Im going up there. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 No.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 No, thank you.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	  You guys need anything, cause Imheading up there. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Woman	 Id love an ice water.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 You got it.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Joey, what are you doing?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Just being friendly. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Joey, honey, I dont think youre supposed to go back there.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Nah, its okay. Right, Gunther? 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Dont wink at me. And put on your apron.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Okay, but I dont see you asking any other paying customers to put onaprons. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Joey, do you work here?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 No.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Customer	 Hey, waiter.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Yeah?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Joey, whats going on. What didnt you tell us you work here?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Its kind of embarrassing, yknow. I mean, I was an actor andnow Im a waiter. Its supposed to go in the other direction.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 So is your apron. Youre wearing it like a cape.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 I mean, the jobs easy and the moneys good, you know? I guessIm going to be hanging out here anyway. I might as well get paid for it, right? Ijust feel kind of weird serving you guys.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Come on, Joey, I did it and it was fine.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yeah, why would it be weird? Hey, Joey, can I get some coffee?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Okay, I guess it doesnt seem that weird.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Seriously, I-I asked you before and you still havent gotten it.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 See, now its weird again.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 I think its great that you work here. Youre going to makea lot of money, and heres your first tip: Dont eat yellow snow. . Ah ha ha, 2:15,coffeehouse.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Well, you know what? This is great. Finally, I have someone I can passon my wisdom too. Let me tell you about a couple of things I learned while working at thecoffeehouse. First of all, the customer is always right.  A smile goes a longway.  And if anyone is ever rude to you? Sneeze muffin.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Thanks, Rach. Look, you guys are just terrific. Yknow? Now, howabout clearing out of here so I can get some new customers. Its all about turnover.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Joey, seriously, can I get my coffee?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Oh, Im sorry, Ross. Ill get it for you right now. And since Imade you wait, Ill toss in a free muffin.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Phoebe. We would like to talk to you for a second.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. And maybe Rachel is a littlebit of a pushover. But you know what we decided you are?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Yes, we are very sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Hah!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 That true, I am flaky.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 So, what, youre just, youre just okay with being flaky?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Yeah, totally.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Well, then, Im okay with being high maintenance.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Yeah, and I am okay with being a pushover.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Thats great. Good for you guys.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 I am not high maintenance!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 I am not a pushover!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Who said you were?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica, Rachel	 You did!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Oh, Im flaky. Ill say anything.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Hey, Gunther. Can you uh, can you cover for me? I just got an audition.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 No, Im leaving to get my hair dyed.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Really?! I like your natural color. Come on man, its a great part.Look, check it out. Im the lead guys best friend and I wait for him in thisbar and save his seat. Listen-listen. Im sorry, that seats saved.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Thats the whole part?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Okay, maybe hes not his best friend, but 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Okay, Ill see you in an hour.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Oh, man, I could totally get that part. Im sorry, that seat istaken.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Patron	 Oh, excuse me.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 No, no, I didnt mean you. But, you believed me, huh?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Patron	 I believed you were saving this seat for someone.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 So, youd hire me, right?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Patron	 For what?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Exactly! All right, everybody, listen up. The coffeehouse is going to beclosed for about an hour. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Customers	 Huh? What?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Yeah, its for the kids. To keep the kids off drugs. Its a veryimportant issue in this months Playboy. Im sure you all read about it.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Its my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Its my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross, Chandler	 Its my joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yknow, I dont think were going to settle this.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Lets have Monica decide.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yeah!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Yeah!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Hey Mon.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Mon, get out here!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Monica! 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Okay, okay. You have to help us decide whose joke this is.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Why do I have to decide?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Because youre the only one that can be fair.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yeah.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 I cant be fair. Youre my boyfriend.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Yeah, but Im your brother. Were family. Thats the mostimportant thing in the world.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Dont try to sway her.   Imyour only chance to have a baby. Okay, lets go.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Well each tell you how we came up with the joke and then you decidewhich one of us is telling the truthme. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Okay, Chandler, you go first.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Okay, I thought of the joke two months ago at lunch with Steve.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Oh, wait, is he the guy I met at Christmas?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Can I finish my story?!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Do you want me to pick you?!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 See, I would never snap at you like that.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Continue.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 So Steve said he had to go to the doctor. And Stevesdoctors name is Doctor Muppy. So I said, Doctor Monkey? And that is howthe whole Doctor Monkey thing came up. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Are you kidding? Okay, look. I-I studied evolution. Remember, evolution?Monkey into man? Plus, Im a doctor, and I had a monkey. Im Doctor Monkey!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Im not arguing with that.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 All right, Ive heard enough. Ive made my decision.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 You are both idiots. The joke is not funny, and its offensive towomen, and doctors, and monkeys! You shouldnt be arguing over who gets credit, youshould be arguing over who gets blamed for inflicting this horrible joke upon the world!Now let it go! The joke sucks! 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 Its your joke.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Is not.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Hi, Chandler. There you are.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Hi, oh hi.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Hey, its Phoebe and Rachel. Um, why dont you tell them whatyou were telling me earlier about me not being high maintenance?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Monica is a self-sufficient,together lady.  Being with her has been like being on a vacation. And what may beperceived as high maintenance is merely attention to detail andgenerosity of spirit.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Wow, you know what? That is the best fake speech I think Ive everheard.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Really? Ive heard better.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Wait, wait, he came up with that himself. Tell them, Chandler.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Im out of words. Should I just say the whole thingagain?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Look, I am not high maintenance. I am not. Chandler!
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Youre a littlehigh maintenance.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 Ahhh! You are on my list.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Im sorry. Youre not easy-going, but yourepassionate, and thats good. And when you get upset about the little things, I thinkthat Im pretty good about making you feel better about that. And thats goodtoo. So, they can say that youre high maintenance, but its okay, because Ilike  maintaining you.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	   I didnt even tell him to saythat. . All right youre off my list. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	  Im off the list.  
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	  Phoebe, its okay that you dont want me tobe your girlfriend because I have the best boyfriend.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	  Yknow, suddenly I find you very attractive.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Hey, buddy boy, howd the audition go?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Not good, no. I didnt get the part, and I lost my job here, so
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Wow! That is a bad audition.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 How-how did you lose your job here?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Well, I had the audition but Gunther said I had to stay here and be incharge so he could go get his hair dyed. So, I went anyway, and then he fired me.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 He left work in the middle of the day to do a personal errand and leftyou in charge when youve been working here two days? Thats not, thatsnot right.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Yeah, what are ya gonna do?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Joey, you cant let him get away with that. Ya know what, Imnot going to let him get away with that. Im going to say something to himNo, Ireally shouldnt say anythingNo, I should say something to him.  Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. That is really not fair that youhave to fire him
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 Okay.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 What?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Gunther	 He can have his job back.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Thats right, he can have his job back. Im glad we got thatall straightened out. There you go, Joey, you got your job back.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Thats great. Thanks Rach.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Yeah, pretty nice, huh? Now whos a pushover?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	  Rach, youre in my seat.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Hey, I never got to hear who you guys would pick to be your girlfriend.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Monica	 I pick you, Phoebe.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Oh, yeah. Definitely you, Pheebs.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, I kinda thought.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Hey.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Rachel	 Hey. Oh, I have a question. If-if-if one of you had to pick one of theother two guys to go out with, who would you pick?
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Ross	 No way. 
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Joey	 Im not answering that.
06	12	0612	The One With The Joke	Chandler	 Joey!  No way. Im not answeringthat. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Okay Rach, that muffin and espresso, $4.50. Ross, double latte, $2.75.Chandler, coffee and a scone, $4.25. And Pheebs, herbal tea, $1.25. So, all togetherthats  $12.75.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 This coming from the man who couldnt split our 80 dollar phonebill in half.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 How much do I owe you for the muffin and the latte?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Oh thats on the house courtesy of Joey Tribbiani.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 Oh great! Well, tell him thanks. And since uh, Joey seems like such anice guy, maybe we could go on a date sometime?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Well, hes not used to women being so forward with him; but uh, Igood check with himHe says its okay.  Great! Thanks!Bye-bye!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Hey Joey, how come our stuff isnt free?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 It will be when you look like that in a tight skirt! This is great!Im getting more dates than ever!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Wait a minute, youre only giving free stuff away to the prettygirls?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah Joey that is so gross!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 How about a scone on the house baby?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	  Im pretty.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Hey does anyone have any gum?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Oh I do!  Oh, yknow what? No. Wait a second.  I know its in here somewhere.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Yknow what? Im good! Im good!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Hey!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Hey!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldnt you be at work?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Ugh, they sent me home. They said I cant work ifIm sick.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	All	 Ohh!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Im so sorry youre sick.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Im not sick!! I dont get sick! Getting sick is for weaklingsand for pansies! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Honey, no one thinks youre a pansy, but we do think you need atissue. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  I have not been sick in over three years!  
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Im gonna grab you some tissue.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 I dont need a tissue! Im fine-d! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 When you put a D at the end of Fine yourenot fine.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Im fine-d. Im fine-d! Yknow, its a really hardword to say.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Yes?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 Hi, is Rachel here? Im her sister.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh my God, Jill!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh my God, Rachel!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Oh my God, introduce us!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 This is Chandler. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 And you know Monica and Ross!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Hi Jill.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 And thats Phoebe , and thats Joey.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Hey,  how you doin?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Dont!!   Honey, what are youdoing here?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	  Which-which sister is this? Is this the spoiled one orthats bitter?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Daddy cut me off.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Never mind, I got it.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 And yknow what I said to him? "Im gonna hire a lawyer andIm gonna sue you and take all your money. Then Im gonna cut you off!"
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Wow! What did he say?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 That he wouldnt pay for my lawyer! Then he told me to come here andlearn about the value of money from the one daughter hes actually proud off.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh! Did you hear that?! My dads proud of me! My dads proudof me.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Rach? 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh yeah, sorry. Wait honey, so what did you do that made dad cut youoff?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Okay, I bought a boat.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 You bought a boat?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Yeah but it wasnt for me, it was for a friend.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Boy did we make friends with the wrong sister! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that couldve everhappened to you. I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! And you know when I didit, I-I-I at first I was scared, and look at me now! Im the only daughter dad isproud of! Okay, well this is, this is what youre gonna do. Youre gonna get ajob, youre gonna get an apartment, and then Ill help you and you can stay withus. Right Pheebs, she can stay with us?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Of course, yeah!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh, thats so great! Okay, Im really gonna do this! Idont know how to thank you guys.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Ooh, I like cards.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	  Are you all finished here?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Customer	 Yes.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Great! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 Okay, here are the tips for this morning. Jen gets 50, 50 for me, andJoey owes eight dollars.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 What?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 For all the free food you gave away.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Well if its free food, how come youre charging me for it?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 We dont give anything away unless its someonesbirthday.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Well, what if they came in third in a modeling contest?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 No!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	  Sorry! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  I just had the hardest day.Those bags are so heavy. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Jill, how did you pay for all this? I thought your dad took away yourcredit card.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh please, I memorized those numbers when I was 15. But look at all thecool make-it-on-my-own stuff I got!  This is my "Please, hireme" sweater.  And these are my, "Dont youwant to rent me this apartment?" pants. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 I dont think charging new clothes too your dad qualifies as makingit on your own.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh, Mr. Scientist has to get all technical!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Seriously, I dont Rachels gonna think its a good idea.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 So who made her queen of the world?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 I would love that job!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	  Hey! Whats goin on?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Hey!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	  Jill! Did you shop?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 No! They did! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe, Ross	 Yeah, we went shopping!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 You went shopping?! What, and then you just came in here and paraded itright under Jills nose when you know shes trying to quit. Wow, you guys areterrible!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Sorry Jill.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Sorry-sorry Jill.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Whatd you get?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Oh well, all right, I got   thank you, Igot uh, this yknow "I want a job sweater." 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 And, and then I got uh, these are apartment pants.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Apartment pants?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah, you never heard of them?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 No, of course, of course Ive heard of them! Ross, what did youget?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Huh? Oh, I got thisthis!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 A pajmena?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Yeah! Oh, I-I love this babies!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Really?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Ross, wants a pajmena?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Its a rug. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Jill?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Im sorry Rachel, Imsorry
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh, come on! You think thats gonna work on me?! I invented that!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Right! But, I am sorry.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 All right, its okay. One little setback is okay, just dontlet it happen again, all right? Now since daddy paid for all this stuff, I shouldtake it all away. But Im just gonna take the-the pajmena. And the uh, and the uh pants. Yknow what, Im just gonna take it all away,cause that way youll just really learn the lesson. Okay? All righty, Imgonna run a couple of errands and I will see you at dinner. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 She took all my stuff.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Yeah. Everything but, the little blue one. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Thats the best one! Oh my God,  thank you so much!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Well. Hey
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh my gosh, that was so lame. Like a pajmena could be a rug!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Oh yeah, how about you and the,  "Imsorry!"
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Shut up! I did not sound like that at all!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 What about, what about when I said yknow about the apartmentpants, how dumb was I?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Were you this cute in high school?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Oh stop.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 No you stop!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 No, you stop!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 You stop!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	  Okay-okay, why dont I sit here andyoull both stop it!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Okay, so what do you, what do you want to do? Lets do somethingcrazy!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 I know, lets rest and drink lots of fluids. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Okay, Ill rest. But yknow if Im going to bed, thenyoure coming with me.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 That would be impossible to resist if you werent all drippyhere. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Are you saying that you dont wanna get withthis? 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Yeah, I dont you should say that even when youre healthy.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Come on. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Dont take this personally okay? Its just that I justcant have sex with a sick person.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Im with you Chandler! I mean I cant have sex with a sickperson either, thats disgusting! But Im not sick! Let me prove it to you. Weare two healthy people in the pribe of libe.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Thats the thing, see I would like to stay in the pribe ofmwha-ah-libe.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Hey!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Hey.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Whats up?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Umm, I think theres something you should maybe know.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Well, itd better not be about the apartment pants, because I justpitched the idea to my boss at Ralph Lauren and she loved it.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 No. No. Its just I was umm, I was with Ross and Jill after youleft and umm, Im pretty sure I saw a little spark between them.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 What?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah I mean its probably nothing, but I just wanted to warn youthat there might be something there.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 With Ross and Jill?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 With Ross and my sister?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 With my sister Jill and my ex-boyfriend Ross?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh there is no way.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 Okay then.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh my God! I can not believe that! I mean I dont really like itwhen Ross goes out with anyone, but my sister isnt that like incest or something?!Oh my God, and theyre gonna have sex! Oh! Oh no what if he marries her too?! Oh thisis just terrible, this is just terrible. And I cant stop it! I cantIdont own Ross! Yknow? And Jill, she should be able to do whatever it is thatshe wants to do! And oh my God, I cant believe Ross is marrying my little sister,this terrible. Oh my God, this is just the worst thing that could have ever happened tome.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Phoebe	 But great news about the apartment pants, huh?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Thatll be $3.85.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 What do you mean? Yesterday you said I was too pretty to pay for stuff!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Its just I cant because my manager said I  "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dearAnnie
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Woman	 Amy!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	  "Amy! Happy birthday to you!"
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	A Male Customer	 Hey, thats weird, todays my birthday too!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Yeah, not it here it isnt.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Sorry Im late, whats up?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	  Oh hi! Yknow, I just wanted to see if there wereany leads on the old job front.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh no! But I just walked past three sales and I didnt go in. Howstrong am I?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 That is great. Hey, yknow who doesnt have to job hunt? Ross.He works at the university. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Yeah.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh so you know that, you guys talked about that, so you get along, soyou think youre gonna go out?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Me go out with Ross?! No! God no! What would make you think that?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 I just, Phoebe, said yknow thought she saw something between youguys.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 No! I mean hes nice.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Hes the kind of guy youre friends with, yknow? Buthes not the kind of guy you date. Hes the kind of guy youd datebecause you did. Me, not so much.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh not-not so much. Umm, what-what do you, what do you mean is theresomething wrong with Ross?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Oh no-no-no, hes just I dont know, hes just a littlebookish.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Are-are you saying hes a geek?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 You think so too?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 No! No I, no Ross is not a geek!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Fine, then lets just say hes not my type.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 What handsome is not your type? Smart? Kind? Good kisser? What thosethings arent on your list? Ross is a great guy! You would be lucky to be with him!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Well okay, if it means that much to you, then Ill ask him out.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no, no-no-no, thats not what I meant.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 No! Yknow what Rachel? Youre right, yknow he has beenreally nice to me.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Yeah but, hes not your type.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Yeah but maybe thats a good thing. Yknow Im doing allthese different sorts of things, and maybe I should try dating a geek too!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Yeah but, you dont, you dont, you dont want to try tomuch too fast. Yknow? I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl thattried to much too fast dont you?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 What?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 She-she died Jill.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Chandler!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Oh what is it honey, you need some tea? Some soup?  Oh-ohhhh!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Calling Dr. Big, Dr. Big to the bed.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Oh Jeez honey, I thought, I thought you were asleep.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 How could I be asleep knowing that you were in the next room.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 I was asleep.  Oh no!No-no honey! Yknow whats sexy? Layers. Layers are sexy. And blankets are sexy.And oh! Hot water bottles are sexy.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Come on, get into bed! I want to prove to you that Im not sick! Iwanna make you feel, as good as I feel.  
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Would you please get some rest!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Im fine. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	  "Happy birthday to you!"
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 Youre paying for that.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 What? No-no its her birthday!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 Youve sung Happy Birthday to 20 different women today!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 But it really
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Gunther	 You are no longer authorized to distribute birthday muffins.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	 Damnit! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	  Rach? Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Did you tell your sister to ask me out?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Well yeah
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Oh wow! I mean, wow! I mean, I-I-I think shes cute but I-I wouldnever have thought of going out with her, never!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Really?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Yeah but after you said it was okay, I figured, "Why not?!"
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh so-so not really never.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 I have to say you are a much bigger person than I am. I mean after allweve been through, I justyknow I wish I had a brother to reciprocate.Hey, if you ever want to go out with Monica, you have my blessing.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Joey	  Oh-ho, and mine!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Chandler, I think Im sick.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Really? Struck down in the pribe of libe!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Okay, fine I admit it! I feel terrible! Would you please rub this on mychest? 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 No-no-no-no-no-no-no, you are not getting me this way.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Come on! I really need your help!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 No-no-no-no-no!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Fine, Ill rub it on myself.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Okay.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 So youre just, kinda rubbing it on yourself?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Yeah?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Its nice.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Are you kidding me?! Is this; is this turning you on?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Yes! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 I cant believe it! What is it? Is it the rubbing or the smell?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Its all very, very good.  So youwanna go uh, mix it up?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Not now, Im sick!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Oh come on you big faker!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 What happened to your rule about never sleeping with sick people?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Well that was before all the vaporizing action.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Okay, if you really wanna have sex
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Okay! 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Worked like a charm.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Hi!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Hi! Wh-what are you doing here?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date. So, what do you think?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Well, I-I dont like it.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Really?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Its kinda slutty.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Its yours!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Yeah well, Im-Im a slut.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	  Me too.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	  Hi Jill!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Jill	 Hey!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Hi .
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Rachel.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Rachel! Well, you-youre not at home,youre-youre-youre right here.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Yeah I know, and I bet you thought it would be weird. But its not!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Ross	 Okay. So well Ill umm,  Ill have her home bymidnight.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Why arent you home yet?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Is someone there?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh yes, its me! Sorry!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	  What are you doing here?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Uh, Im just, Im just looking out your window. At-at theview. What are you guys doing?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 We got some Vap-O-Rub in some places.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	  Oh, he brought her back to his apartment.
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	  Who?  Is that your sister?
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Ugh, she is a slut!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 God, Ross is on a date with your sister! How weird is that?!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh my God, look-look hes taking off her clothes!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Hes taking off her coat!
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh, this is just terrible. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Monica	 Oh no its not, no its not. Its a first date. Im surethat nothing is gonna
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Rachel	 Oh. 
06	13	0613	The One With Rachel's Sister	Chandler	 Ho-oh, hes gonna get some!  Of the glarefrom the streetlight out of his apartment. Yknow so umm, hes closed the drapesthere so he can have a nice, pleasant conversation with your little sister.  Well,Im off to bed! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  Oh, uh, hey Rach. I uh, I was just coming over here touh Oh wait, I dont have to lie to you, you dont live here anymore. Uh,Im eating their food. What are you doing?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Ross is on a date with my sister and they shut the drapes two anda-half-hours ago.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Whoa, I didnt know we could date your sister!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Joey we know you steal our food.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Im good.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	  Oh, are the drapes still closed hon?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Yeah. And yknow who shouldve shut their drapes? Is thatperverted old couple two doors over.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	  Is that a swing?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh dont even ask!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Yuck!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 I cant believe Ross went out with Rachels sister! WhenChandler made out with my sister I was mad at him for 10 years.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 That was like 5 years ago.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Yeah you got 5 years left!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Joey
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 You wanna make it 6?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh Ross, hi! Hey, how are ya? There you are!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	  Ill take a coffee.  So how was your big datelast night?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Uhh, it was okay. Yeah, it was fun.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Yeah fun? Great! So uh, so did you guys hit it off?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 I guess so.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 So uh, so did anything happen? Because rumor has it you guys shutthe drapes!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 No. No. Nothing happened. I shut the drapes to uh, show her slides of myfavorite fossils.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh, slides.  So really nothing happened.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Something couldve happened. All right? She-she really dug my slides.And-and she was definitely giving me the vibe.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Right. Was it the, "Please dont show me another picture of atrilobite vibe?"
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Anyway, if she, if she wasnt in to me, why-why would she ask me outagain?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 She asked-asked you out again?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Yeah-uh-huh. Tomorrow night, Valentines Day, the most romantic dayof the year. Who knows what could happen? I might not be shutting my drapes to show her myslides, if you know what I mean.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay! I got it! I got it! I got it! Icant! I cant! I cant! I cannot go with you and my sister thing. Okay? Ijust cant. Its just too weird, all right? I imagine the two of you togetherand I freak out. It freaks me out. I cant do it! I cant do it.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	  Okay! Okay! Okay! Its okay. Its okay. Hey, its too weird for you, I wont see heragain.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Thank you. Iyeah.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 I mean after tomorrow night.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 No-no-no! No-no-no! Please Ross, I cant! I cant do it! Its just gonna freak me out!!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Okay! Okay! Ooh-hey-hey-hey! Okay! Okay! Okay! Ill-Ill tellher tonight I cant see her anymore.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Ross thanks.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 You want me to call her right now?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh no! No! No-no-no-no! No, I mean come on thats-thatscrazyI mean thats crazy. So whats-whats going on with you? What isgoing on with you?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Well umm, oh! I might be teaching another class this semester!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Yeah do it now, call right now.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	  This is my favorite part.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	  Yeah me too.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Oh yknow whats sadder than this? Bambi. I cried forthree days with that movie. No wait two! Because on the third day my mother killed herselfso I was partly crying for that.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	  Well see now that I can see crying over, but Bambiis a cartoon!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  You didnt cry when Bambis mother died?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Yes it was very sad when the guy stopped drawing the deer!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Chandler theres nothing wrong with crying! I mean you donthave to be so macho all the time.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Im not macho.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Yeah youre right. I dont know what I was thinking.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 No, I guess I just never really cried. Yknow? Im not acrying kind of guy.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Come on man theres gotta be something that gets you choked up! Likeuh, uh oh, what if you saw a three-legged puppy?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Id be sad sure, but I wouldnt cry.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Okay, what if the puppy said, "Help me Chandler. All the otherpuppies pick on me."
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Cry?! I just found a talking puppy, Im rich!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Oh, Ive got it! I have got it!  Pictures from your childhood. This will get you goinggood!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 All right, whats going on there? 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Oh, thats Parents Day, first grade. Thats me withthe janitor Martin.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Where were your parents?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Oh they didnt want to come!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Oh Chandler!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Poor thing!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 So that story doesnt make you cry?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 No! Look, I dont cry! Its not a big deal! Okay?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 No! Its not okay! Its not okay at all!! Youre deadinside!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 Excuse me.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Yeah?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 Are you Phoebe Buffay?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Yeah.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 Can-can I get your autograph, Im your biggest fan. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Oh youre my biggest fan? Ive always wanted to meet you! Hi! Sure! Yeah! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 Wow! Wow, thanks a lot! I just wanna say, I think youre reallytalented.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Youre just saying that because youre my biggest fan.   Joey listen, take good care of that guy, okay? Hes a fan.  Bye! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  So, you saw me on Days Of Our Lives huh? Want me to,want me to do a little Dr. Drake Remoray for ya?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 I have no idea what youre talking about. But I, but I just gotPhoebe Buffays autograph!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Oh, youre Phoebes fan!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 Oh yeah! Ive seen all her movies.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Movies?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 That was Phoebe Buffay, the porn star.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  I dont think so.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Fan	 No-no, it was! She was in Sex Toy Story 2, Lawrence of Alabia, and Igot her autograph! The guys at the comic book store arent gonna believe this!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Hey Gunther, dont let that guy in here anymore! He just saidPhoebes a porn star!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Gunther	 Well, I wouldnt call her a star, but shes really good. Youshould check out Inspecther Gadget.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Youll never believe what just happened, Ross just totally blew meoff and he didnt even tell me why!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Ohhh well. Yknow what honey? The best thing to do to get over aguy is to start dating someone else. Oh! There is this great guy you will love at worknamed Bob! Hes a real up-and-comer in Human Resources.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Yknow, thanks for trying to cheer me up, but Im not gonna datesome random guy from your work.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Its not random, its Bob.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Its probably because not mature enough. Or smart enough. Maybe hedoesnt like the way I dressNo that cant be it. Its really gotta bethe smart thing. Oh Im so stupid! Im just like this incredibly prettystupid girl!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 No honey, okay, okay, you wanna know why Ross canceled the date? BecauseI asked him to.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 You asked him too?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Hm-mmm.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Why?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Because you are my sister and Ross and I have this huge history
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 I dont understand, do you want to go out with Ross?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 No.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 You dont want him, but you dont want me to have him?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	  Yknow Bob in Human Resources
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Ugh! I cannot believe you did this too me! You had me doubting how smart Iwas!  You had me doubting my fashion sense!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Look, this is not that big of a deal! You just dont date Ross!Theres a million other guys out there, you just
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Hey! You have no right to tell me what to do.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Im not telling you what to do! I am telling you what not todo!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Why are you so jealous of me?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Jill this is not about me being jealous of you! This is about you beinga brat! Wanting what you cant have!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Cant have?! Excuse me, the only thing I cant have is dairy!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 All right, all right, well you just blew your chances at dating Bob!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Who?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 In Human Resources!!!!!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 I am jealous of her?! I mean who does she think she is?! PrincessCaroline?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Youre jealous of Princess Caroline?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Do I have my own castle?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Hey! Uh, Phoebes not here is she?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 No.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	  Oh great! Did you get a movie?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Uhhh, yeah. Yeah. But uh, I dont think its the kindyoure gonna like.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 You didnt get more movies that are gonna have us reaching forthe tissues all night did you?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Sort of
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Guys, whats going on?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  Phoebes a porn star!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	All	 What?!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Phoebe Buffay in Buffay: The Vampire Layer.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh my God!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Thats Phoebe! Where did you get that?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Well down at the adult video place down on Bleaker.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 And-and I, and I saw that Joey was about to go in, so I ran in ahead ofhim to-to surprise him and, and then I pretended I didnt know he was in there. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Wow! I mean, I justI cant, I cant believe this.Yknow, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe whos always beensomewhat of a question mark.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 This is so bizarre. I guess it kinda makes sense though, yknow shehad such a terrible childhood.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Hey, I had a terrible childhood and I dont do porn.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Yes, but you are dead inside.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 All right well, Id better take that back.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Wh-what, why?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 We cant watch that! I mean thats Phoebe!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Yeah youre right, we cantwe shouldnt watch this.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Absolutely not.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Yknow maybe a little bit!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Probably just the first half.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 No! Hey no! This is wrong you guys! Phoebes our friend! Well,Im not gonna watch it!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Yeah! Good for you Joe!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Yeah.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Buffay, The Vampire Layer	 Ah, I thought Id find you here, Nasforatool.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	The Vampire	 Buffay, are you going to plunge your stake into my dark places?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Buffay, The Vampire Layer	 Actually, I was kinda hoping it would be the otherway around.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Hold on a second! What is that on her ankle?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Her ankle is what youre watching?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Well its hard to tell  Oh God, if she would just stop moving.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Shes just doing her job!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	  You sick bastards!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh, its a tattoo! Thats weird, Phoebe doesntWait thats Ursula! Thats not Phoebe that is Ursula!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Re! Re! Then I can watch that! Rewind it! Rewind it!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	  Hey! Whats up?  Oh my God! What am Idoing?!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Hey sweetie!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Hey! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	  Chicken Soup for the Soul? 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Theres no back to this couch!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Why are you reading this? You hate this kind of stuff.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Yeah I know, but I figured a shot yknow? Maybe one of thosestories would make me cry and then you wouldnt think I was yknow, all deadinside.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Oh thats so sweet! Look Chandler I dont care if youcant cry, I love you.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Oh that makes me feel so warm in my hollow tin chest.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Stop it!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 No, I mean, come on, seriously think about it, we get married,were up at the altar and Im like this. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 I wont care, because I know you will be feeling it all in here.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Yeah?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Yeah! And if, and if we have a baby one-day, and the doctor hands it toyou in the delivery room and you dont cry, so what! And-and-and, and if we take himto college and come home and see his empty room for the first time, and you got nothing,it wont matter to me.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Okay, well I wont uh, worry about this anymore then.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 And-and-and if I die, from a long illness. And youre writing outmy eulogy and you open a desk drawer and you find a note from me that says, "I willalways be with you," and you still cant shed one tiny tear, I know youllbe crying a river inside.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Aww, I love you so
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 What is wrong with you?!!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 What?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 What?! You cant shed a tear for your dead wife!! Now, I left you anote from the beyond!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 So you didnt mean any of that?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 No you robot!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 You damn kids! You ring my bell one more time, I swear to  Ohh, uh Jill. Umm, that-thats just a little gameI play with the kids down the hall. Umm, theyve really taken a liking to me. Uhhwhats-whats-whats the matter?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Rachel and I had a really big fight, can I come in? I-I mean I knowwere not supposed to see each other anymore and Im okay with that, itsjust that I dont know anybody in the city and I really need somebody to talk toabout it.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Of course, what happened? 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	  I dont want to talk about it.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Okay, umm
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 But you know what might really cheer me up?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 What?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Seeing some more of your super-cool slides.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Wow! Really?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Totally, I love them! And, maybe you could finish telling me about all thedifferent kinds of sand.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Well, Id love to! Here, you wait right here and Ill go get theprojector and my notes!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Oh great! Thanks Ross, youre such a good friend!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Ohh!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Hey! Have you guys seen Jill? I cant find her anywhere.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 No, I havent.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Well, is Ross home? Maybe Ill just call him to see if hesactually seen her. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 Who is it?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Its Phoebe! Phoebe!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	  Oh God. So-so youre making porn movies.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 No Im not.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	ManS Voice	 Were still rolling!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Youre making one right now!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Another ManS Voice	 Lets go Phoebe!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 And-and youre using my name!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 Yeah, can I help you with something?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Same ManS Voice	 Phoebe, come on!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Look, Im talking right now! Youreyou mean her.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 Yknow, twin stuff is always a real big seller.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 What?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ursula	 Yeah, I can talk them into giving you like, 30 dollars.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 No!! No way! No! And stop using my name! And shame on you!  And shame on all of you! Youre disgusting! Especially you  with that! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Slides are almost ready.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Yeah. Ooh, I know what this is missing! Alcohol!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Uh okay, well theres-theres wine in the kitchen.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 Oh great! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	  Hello?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	  What is my sister doing there?! And why are thedrapes shut?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 O-okay, Rach calm-calm down, okay? She-shes really upset werejust talking.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Ross! I think she is trying to make something happen with you to getback at me!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 So thats the only reason she could be here huh? It couldnthave anything to do with the fact that-that maybe Im a good listener and I uh I puton a great slide show!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Yknow what? I think I can take care of myself, Ill talk to youlater. Good-bye. Whoa! Uh, that was your sister actually. She-she thinks that youre just using me.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 So? 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Hey!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 So, I just came from the company Ursula works for.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Oh no, not you too!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 No! No! I just went to pick up Phoebe Buffays checks; there were alot of them.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Nice!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Um-mmm, and I wont have to go there anymore because I gavethem my correct address.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Thats great, but isnt it gonna bother that people still thinkyoure a porn star?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Oh no! No! I know how to handle it.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 You do?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Phoebe	 Yeah.   Youre trying to figure outwhere you know me from? All right, Ill give you a hint. From porn! Okay?  Yeah your pervert boyfriend watched me in a porno movie!  See?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Joey	 Yeah.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	 Hey.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	  You uh, you may have been right about Jill.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh! I knew it! What happened?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Umm, she kissed me.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 What?! You kissed!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	  Maybe we should give them some privacy.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	  Shhhh!!!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Look, I uh, I tried not to kiss her, okay?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Well, it doesnt sound like it! I mean, its pretty easy notto kiss someone, you just dont kiss them! See look at us, right now, not kissing!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Let me finish, okay? She started kissing me and-and I didnt stop it.I guess I-I just wasnt thinking
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Yeah thats right you werent thinking! Yknow what? Letme give you something to think about! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Oh waithold it! But then I started thinking and I stopped thekissing.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Oh, well thank you for taking your tongue out of my sisters mouthlong enough to tell me that.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Look I-I realize if anything were to happen with me and Jill then nothingcould ever happen with us!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 What?!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 No, I mean, look I dont know if anything is going to happen with us,again. Ever. But I dont want to know that it-it never could. So I stopped it and shegot mad and broke my projector.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Wow. I, I dont even know what to say. Thank you. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 Youre welcome. 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Oh my God! Are-are you crying?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	  I just dont see why those two cantwork things out!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	 All right, Im leaving! Because Im not going to spend one moreday with someone whose out to sabotage my every move. Thats you Rachel!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Yeah, I got that.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	  And you! I throw myself at you and you say no, how gay are you?
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Ross	 You take care Jill.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Jill	  Okay, see ya! 
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Rachel	 Bye-bye-e!
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Monica	 Bye.
06	14	0614	The One Where Chandler Can't Cry	Chandler	  I-I cant believe Jills gone.  I cant help it, I opened a gate.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hey, you guys! Guess what? Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Wow!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  What is the matter with you?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No! Barry and Mindy.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh sorry, I hear divorce I immediately go to Ross. Who-whos Barry and Mindy?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Barry was the guy that I was almost married and Mindy was my bestfriend.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Ohh-oh, wasnt he cheating on you with her?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah, but that just means that he was falling asleep on top of herinstead of me.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Why did they get divorced?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well, apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else.Isnt that sad?  God, could you imagine if I actually married him?! I meanhow different would my life be?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 I know what you mean, Ive always wondered how different my lifewould be if-if Id never gotten divorced.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Which time?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 The first time! No seriously, imagine if Carol hadnt realized shewas a lesbian.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  I cant. I keep seeing it the good way.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Id bet Id still be doing my kara-tay.  Towards the end of our marriage I was doing a lot ofkara-tay as a way of releasing the tension from yknow, not doing anything elsephysical.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Maybe the problem was you were pronouncing it kara-tay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 And what if I was still fat?  Well, you wouldnt bedating me, thats for sure.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Sure I would!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	All	  Oh yeah! Come on! Yeah right!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 What, you guys really think that Im that shallow?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No, I just think Monica was that fat.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, imagine if I never got fired off Days Of Our Lives!  Oh-hey, theres Carol again!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 What if I had had the guts to quit my job? Id probably bewriting for the New Yorker, getting paid to be funny. But my jobs fun too! Imean tomorrow, I-I dont have to wear a tie.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What if I had taken that job at Merrill Lynch?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 What?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Merrill Lynch?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, I had a massage client who worked there and-and he said I had aknack for stocks.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well why didnt you take the job?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Because at that time you see, I thought everything that rhymed was true.So I thought yknow that if Id work with stocks, Id have to live in abox, and only eat lox, and have a pet fox.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, do you guys think that if all those things happened, wed stillhang out?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  Oh my God! Rachel Green?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Rob Tillman!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No-no. Its-its me, Ross!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry. Ross Tillman.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No, no-no, Ross Geller.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh, of course Monicas brother!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah. Right.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wow! How are you?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Good-good, Im-Im married. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh! Me too!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Is-isnt it the best?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, its the best!  So, umm hows Monica?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh really, really great! Yeah! A-actually shes right down thestreet, umm, do-do you know what? You should stop bye and say hi.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh, I would love too.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah? Oh-oh, shed be so excited!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh! Okay!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Come on! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh wait, dont you have to pay for your, Busty Ladies?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No, its okay. Some-some kid asked me to pick it up for him, but Idont
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh yeah? Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 But! Dont you have to give him his money back?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh-huh.  Hey, hereyou go buddy. Sorry, no porn for you.  Okay, lets go see Monica!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 So Monica, still going out with Dr. Boring huh?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hes not boring! Hes just-hes just low key.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	  Here we go, one Hazelnut Latte. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Thanks.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	 Yeah. Yknow, the hazelnut actually not a nut,its a seed.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Wow!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	 Can anyone else name a well known seed thats beenmasquerading as a nut?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh dear God, let me think. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  Hey.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh no! Whats the matter?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh I just got another rejection letter. They said my writing wasfunny, just not "Archie Comic funny."
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	 Yknow what honey? I got to get back to the hospital.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	  Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Bye.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica'S Boyfriend	 Bye-bye.  Oh uh, by the way, the answeris, the Brazil nut. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Was his question whats more boring than him?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey man, look sorry about that Archie thing. Do uh, do you need meto give you some money?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey, I may have no money, but I still have my pride.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Really?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Ehh.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Maybe Joey doesnt have to give you the money, TV stars haveassistants right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Thats an idea!  Hey, if I hired an assistant,would-would you take money from her?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No Joey! Chandler could be your assistant! See, he could answer all ofyour fan mail and stuff!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Thats great! That would be great! Lets do that!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I could use the money; it could give me time to write.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh right great! Welcome aboard!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All right! Now hey, I need to use the bathroom. Since I dont needany assistance in there, take a break!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 All right!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey Phoebe! Guess what?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Joey just hired Chandler to be his assistant!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ohh thats so sweet!  Oh! Hang on!  Hang onnnnnn!!!   Go!! No! No-no! I said sell when ithits 50! 5-0, its a number! It comes after 4-9!! No, its okay. Its okay,youre allowed one mistake. Just kidding, you are of course fired.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey Mon! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Mon, look who I ran into! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  Oh my God! Rachel!!   You look terrific!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh, so do you! Did you lose weight? 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 You are so sweet to notice! Yes, I lost three and a half pounds!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 And, and uh, you-you remember my friend Chandler. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 And thats Phoebe over there! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hi!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God, sit down! Sit down! How long as it been since weve seeneach other?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  1987, the day after Christmas, at Sean McMahonsparty. I played you one of my songs, yknow Interplanetary Courtship Ritual.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh yeah. Right. So now, aredo you, do you still do music?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Sometimes, you should come over  sometime!Ill play you one of my other
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh my God! Joey Tribbiani from Daysof Our Lives, just walked in here!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Rach, hes a friend of ours.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  You are friends with Dr. Drake Remoray?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well its kinda hard to be friends with Drake because of his busyschedule and the fact that hes not real.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  Hey-hey, or I could bring my keyboard over heresometime!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hes coming over! Hes coming over!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  Joey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  I know,here-here!! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Ohhh!  No! This is my friend Rachel, we went to HighSchool together.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Hi!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Hi!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Hi! I love you on that show! Iwatch you everyday! I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife eventhough she tired to kill you
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, its always nice to meet the fans.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ah!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Shes not crazy is she?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  So uh, how you doin?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hang on! Hang on! Hang on!  Go!! Whos this? Oh okay, youre gonna like working for me. Whats your name? What kind of name is Brendy? I Whatever Stop talking! All right, from now onyour name is Joan. You can pick your own last name.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey there you are!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Uh-oh, its my boss!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All right, heres a list of things for you to do today. Man, thisgoing to be so great! Thank you so much! All right, I got to go to work Imdelivering twins today, but only one of them is mine! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  Drop off my dry cleaning. Pick up my vitamins.Teach me how to spell vitamins. Wear in my new jeans.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  You realize what you are dont you?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Youre his bitch.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	  No-no!! No!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  Oh wait! You didnt just sit on my Kit-Kats didyou?!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No! There-there was a little, a little diff in the market and I lost 13million dollars.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 But the Kit-Kats are all right?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What am I gonna do?! What am I gonna do?! I cant call my officetheyll kill me! I cant call my clients theyll kill themselves! Great,now my chest hearts.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 What?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	  My chest hurts! Oh, and now I-I cant breathe.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Phoebe, are you having a heart attack?! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, if I were, would-would I have shooting pains up and down my leftarm?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yes!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Then yes that is what Im having. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Come on Pheebs, its not that bad! Yknow most people would beexcited if they didnt have to work for a couple of weeks.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Most people dont like their jobs, I love my job! I have notbeen working for three hours and Im already going crazy. I miss Joan.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Honey, having a heart attack is natures way of telling you to slowit down.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I always thought having a heart attack was natures way oftelling you to die!  But youre not gonna die. I mean, you aregoing to die, but youre not gonna die today. I wish I was dead.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Lets take a walk.  Yknow maybe youshould consider writing for Talking Out of Your Ass magazine! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	  So whats going on with you?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Well umm, Ive been doing a lot more of my kara-tay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Still going through that dry spell with Carol?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 How long has it been since you had sex?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Well, last weekend
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh thats not so bad.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 will be two months
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 That is.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 since I stopped trying.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Maybe you need to spice things up a little.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 What-what do you mean?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I dont know. You could tie her up, she could tie you up; you couldeat stuff off each other
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yknow, dirty talk, ménage à trois, toys
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Wow!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Roll playing You could be the warden; she could be the prisoner.You could be the pirate; she could be the wench!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, I think I got it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah! Or too, you could be two stockbrokers andyoure-youre-youre rolling around naked on the trading floor andeverybodys watching!  It never happened.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Sorry. So hows it going with Joey?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh just great. He beeps me now with codes. One is, "Bring mefood." Two is, "Im with a girl, bring us food." Three is,"Im lost and I cant find food."
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey! Is uh, is she gonna be all right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah! Shes right in there! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh great.   Hey! Go take off those pants,they look ready!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All right, and over there is Bradys Pub where I like to unwind aftera long day of surgeoning.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wow! This is so amazing! What else? What else?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, that is a large piece of television equipment.  And uh that is an oldman! Hey old man!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All righty, what do you say we head back to my place?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Wow! Umm, yknow, I-I would really love to, but I-Ishouldnt.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Why?  Why cant the world stop turning, justfor a moment? Just for us?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Isnt that a line from the show?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Uh, yeah but uh,  I may have said those thingsbefore but, I never truly meant them. Until now.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Thats a line from the show too!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay, you watch too much TV.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  Here you go Joe, heres the freshly squeezed orangejuice you asked for. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Thanks!  Yeah, theres pulp in that. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 I thought we talked about this. I dont like pulp. No pulp. Pulpisnt juice. All juice, okay?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Im sorry, I guess I just like the pulp.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God, Im sorry, Im being so rude. Rachel, would like a soda or something? Because Chandler would run right out and get it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah sure, iced tea would be great.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Iced tea.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay, anything for you sir?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Did I not just tell him?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Yes, you did.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Okay look, Chandler, if this  you have got to listen!   Youre gonna throw that juice at me, arent ya?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Its not all juice! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 So honey, this morning was fun, huh? Me hopping in on you in the showerthere.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Yeah! And maybe someday we could get a place with two bathrooms.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Look Carol umm, I was, I was thinking maybe uh, maybe we can spice thingsup a little.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 What do you mean?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Carol our sex life isits just not working
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ben	  Dad!! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey there little fella! Hey, uh-hey, why dont we get some shoes onya, huh? Hey, why dont you show dad how you can put your shoes on, in your room!Yay!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ben	 Yay! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yay!  Seriously, our sex life I was thinking, maybe Idont know, we could try some-some new things. Yknow? For fun?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Like what?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Well I dont know umm,  what if we were too tie each other up? Umm, some people eatstuff off one another.  Nah! Umm, yknowwe-we could try dirty talk?  Umm, we could, we could have athreesome.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	  I love that idea!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Who sold a story to Archie Comics?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God! Thats great! Oh wow!  Youre apublished writer! I wish I had a present for you!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Aww.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Wait a minute!  My last Kit-Katbar!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 You wanna share it?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey! Hey Chandler look, I know youre mad, but I just wantto say Im sorry. I-I was a total jerk. Completely o-over the line. Uh, I just I hatepulp! Yknow? I mean, yknow how Monica feels about low fat mayonnaise?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Its not mayonnaise!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, o-o-o-o-okay anyway, I just wanted to say Im sorry. Here. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Whats this?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Fresh squeezed orange juice, with pulp! Just the way you like it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Aww, thanks man. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey Joey, Chandler sold a story to Archie Comics!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God! Thats great! Congratulations! Whats the story?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh you wouldnt uh, care. Its just a stupid comic bookstory.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Are you kidding me?! I love Archie! And the whole gang!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well uh, Archie needs money to fix his jalopy , uh but hedoesnt want Reggie to just give him the money. So Reggie hires him as hisassistas his butler. And then makes him do all these crazy things like bring himmilkshakes that cant have lumps in them.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Wait a minute. That sounds a little familiar! Did they already do thatone? Cause I think I read it!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh Mon, listen I have to ask! Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back tohis apartment, now does he do this with a lot of girls?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, a lot. A lot, a lot!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh! And Im one of them!! Wow! Oh, I just cannot believe this! Imean, Joey Tribbiani!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Well, yknow its none of my business, but arent youmarried?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah. Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit!Yknow I just wish we could be like on a break!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Well, youre not.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, its so easy for you I mean, youre not married, you getto have sex with who ever you want!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah I can!  And dont think I dont, because I do! Imean all the time, you betcha! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Monica. Youve, youve done it right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  Of course I have! What do you think, Im some 30 year oldvirgin?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God! Youre a 30 year old virgin!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Say it louder, I dont think the guy all the way in the back heardyou!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Guy All The Way In The Back	 Yeah, I heard it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Its not like, I havent any opportunities. I mean,yknow, Im just waiting for the perfect guy. Im seeing this guy Roger,all right? Hes not perfect, but umm, I think maybe I should just get it over with.Yknow, give him my flower.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God!! Do it!! Honey, youve waited long enough!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow what? You are right?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yes!! I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! There shouldnt beall this rules and restrictions! Yknow, people should be able to sleep with who everthey want, whenever
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Rachel! Im never gonna think its okay for you to cheat onyour husband!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh what do you know? Virgin!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Phoebe, why is smoke coming out of the bathroom?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, the doctor said that could be one of the side effects. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Phoebe! Put that cigarette out!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No! Its not a cigarette! The smoke is coming out of me!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Put it out!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay! Okay!  Im soglad youre here.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Come on.  I got it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, give it to me.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 I got it!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Give it!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  Hello?  No she cant come to the phone rightnow.  Oh, right no problem. Okay, bye-bye. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Was it my work? Were they mad? Was it Jack? Did he yell?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 J-j-just relax, nobody yelled. Jack just was calling to make sure that youwere getting better.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Thank God.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	  Yeah, shes fired.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Nurse	 Youve done all you can Dr. Wesley. You have got to lether go.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Wesley	 Good-bye and God speed, Hope Brady. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Drake Remoray	 Not so fast Wesley! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Wesley	  Remoray!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Drake Remoray	 Thats right Wesley! I just stopped by to say that,youre not a real doctor! And that womans brain, is fine!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh! Thank God!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Drake Remoray	 Hope! Hope!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Hope	  Drake!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Drake Remoray	 Youre not dying Hope, youre gonna live a long,healthy life. With me.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Hope	 Oh Drake.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay!  Here we go! Okay!  Hi, Joey! Its Rachel! Umm, I am free tomorrownight. Yeah, sure, sure I can bring some sandwiches.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 So honey this uh, this threesome thing umm, I mean how-how are you gonnastart to find
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Ooh, actually Ive been making a list of all the women I know whomight be into doing this!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh.  Wow!  Huh.  Boy!  Well, someonesbeen doing their homework. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Yeah. Ooh, and I know Gail Rosten is in there twice, but she is so
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh, I know.  Yknow, just-just talking about it is getting mekinda
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Oh, me too.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah? Well, I-I think Bens asleep.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Oh umm, yknow I think it would be better if we just save it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah. Right. Save it. I can do that. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, Pheebs!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, hows it going?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well, Ive got to get out of this bed, Im going crazy here.Crazy!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	  Here you go sweetie.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What the hell is this, herbal tea? I hate herbal tea!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 But, I put some honey in it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 She doesnt know she was fired yet, does she?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 No, the doctors say it may kill her.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What are you two girls whispering about over there?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  But I think we should tell her.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, maybe this whole heart attack thing is a sign, that-that youshould start think about getting a different job.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay, what is this? A stupid contest? Because we got a winner here!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Listen Phoebe, hes right. People are not supposed to have heartattacks at 31.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I know! But if I didnt work there, what else would I do?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Well, you used to like playing the guitar.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah that was lucrative! Smart like your brother!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Uh, what about yknow the massage thing? That never gave you aheart attack.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hmm, pulling in a salary in the high six figures or rubbing gross nakedpeople for chump changeooh, what do I do?! What will I do?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh, I mean its just so realistic!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 I know.  Yeah, his name is Pat.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Pat the dog. Oh! Oh! I get it!! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Do you uh, do youready for a refill?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, I probably shouldntso I will!  Oh! Wow! Its like itsraining!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Pretty cool, huh? But if youre thinking you can put a fish in thereand it wouldnt get sucked up into the mechanism, well youd be wrong.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Umm, can I use your bathroom?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Its uh, right through there. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay.  God yknow, if someone told me a week agothat I would be peeing in Joey Tribbianis apartment
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, lifes pretty great isnt it?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah, it sure is!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I hope youre hungry, were starting with oysters. Andyknow what they say about oysters, dont you?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 They have parasites?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No! Umm well, some people say that Oysters are an aphrodisiac. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 What people?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 People! People say it! Come here! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 So oysters, huh?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 And then were gonna have a little Middle Eastern cous-cous.Something we can eat, with our hands.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 Yknow, its funny, but when we were studying communicablediseases
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No-no-no, no! Its sensual!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 Ohh! Didnt know! Okay! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay!  Ohhh no!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Dr. Roger	 Im sorry sweetie, its the hospital. The food looks great,maybe save me some?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I cant promise anything. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Were really gonna do this, huh?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Looks like it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yknow, if, if this is too weird for you, we can still back outat 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	  I got it!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	  Susan! Hi! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Susan	 Hey! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Thank you so much for coming.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Susan	 Oh, I wouldnt miss it for the world.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Im-Im Ross by the way.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Susan	  Hello Ross.  I love what youve done with this space.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Carol	 Thank you so much.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 How hot is this?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Im sorry youre here with me instead of Roger.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, me too.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, I could make it seem like hes here. "Heres some little known facts about cous-cous. They didnt add the secondcous until 1979." 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Stop it!! Thats not funny!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Im sorry, okay? It justtonight was supposed to beyknow, it was supposed to be a big deal.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 What was tonight?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 You dont want to know what tonight was.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.  What was tonight?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Well, tonight waswas going to be my first time.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 With Roger?  Not just with Roger?!  Oh my God!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 All right relax Mr. Ive Had Sex Four Times!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Four different women! Ive had sex way more times!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 How many?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Nine.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I was just waiting for the perfect guy.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well good, good for you. You really think that Roger is the perfectguy?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No. Hes not a horrible guy.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey thats what I tell girls about me.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler, Im gonna die a virgin!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 No you are not! You are sweet and wonderful and this is gonna happenfor you.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh really? When? Do you wanna do it with me?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I was kidding.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 So was I.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Joey, youre such an amazing actor!  How do you knowwhere Dr. Drake Remoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, with Dr. Drake they always tell me what to say. And with Joey, Ipretty much have to make it up on my own.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wow! Tell me something JoeyWhoa! Ijust fell right off the couch there.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah you did.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay.  
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Here you go. Let me ask you a question.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 When was the last time someone told you just how beautiful you are?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wow! I cant, I cant feel my hands.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Come, come here. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 We cant do this.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 No!  Oyster?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah!  If-if-if we did do this there would be a lot ofpressure on me, yknow? Because youve been waiting a very long time and Iwouldnt want to disappoint you.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah but see I have nothing to compare it too. So even if yourehorrible, how would I know?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I do like that.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Its harder for me! I have those four other women to compete with!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, if it helps there were only three. So it would just be fortonight, right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Absolutely! It would just be one friend  helping outanother friend. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Stop it! Were doing this! Lets do it!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Noo!! Okay!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Umm, do you have any uhh, moves?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I have some moves.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I have no moves.  Okay, whatcha doin there?!  Oh yknow what? Im sorry,this is just too weird.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah, lets just forget it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 What if I turn out the lights? 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  Yeah?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Thats the couch.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh my God!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 I know! Ill tell you something, we are gonna do that again!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, okay! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Morning!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh right.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh God. Oh I cant believe Joey Tribbiani heard me throwup!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Well he actually saw you a little bit too.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Noo! Oh God we didwe didnt, we didnt uhh
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 No! No! No, not after seeing that.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 God Im just a horrible person.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Wh-why?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Because Im married. Thats right, I am a married woman! And Icame to a TV stars apartment to have an affair! Uck!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Thats ridiculous! Im not a "Star," just a regularfamous actor.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah and Im a horrible, horrible person.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Rachel, would you stop saying that?! Hey-hey look, remember on the showwhen-when Caprice was dying and she gave me
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 The ring from the cave, yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Wow! Uh okay, well uh 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh my God, they let you keep that stuff?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Sure! As long as they dont find out you can keep whatever you want!And I want you to have it.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 No! No-no-no
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yes! Yes!! And every time you look at it, I want you to remember that youare a good person. Okay, youve had the chance to cheat, and with me, but youdidnt. And thats what this ring stands for.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 But I thought that ring stood for Caprices undying love for herbrother.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Look, do you want the ring or not?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Look at you! Youre up!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All right!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I thought Id try to take a walk. Would you pour me some water?Ill be back soon.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! Youre not gonna use the pay phone to call work, areya?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No. Ive learned my lesson.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Lets go! Come on! Move it!  Come on!  Shoes! Briefcase! Thanks Lou, good luck with the gall bladder. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey Joe did Did you ever have a threesome?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	  Well uh, look Ross I uh, I thinkCarols great and Im sure youre a very attractive man, but I.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No! The reason Im asking is that I sorta had one last night.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 You?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Wow!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 All right! So, was it amazing?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 It was, it was okay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Just okayDid you do it right?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Look, its just did, did you ever go to a party and think,"Would really anyone miss me if I werent here?"
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Huh. But still Ross, youre worst day with two women, pretty muchbetter than any other day! Yknow what I mean?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh-oh, absolutely!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Its just, my part seemed to be over pretty quickly and then, andthen there was a lot of waiting around.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 But you got to be with both of them, right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Not-not really. Th-th-there was just Carol.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Not the other one?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No, she kept kicking me away!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, you dont want that.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 No!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Well hey, at least you got to see a lot of stuff, right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh I a lot of stuff!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 You got a little bored?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 A little. Yeah. I made a snack.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah? What did ya have?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Just a sandwich. Turkey, a little mustard
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Joey	 Sounds good.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 It really was!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Let me tell you about this chick I scored with last night! Oh no waita minute that was you!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey, check me out, Im a slut!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 So you uh, want to do something tonight?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh I cant. Dr. Roger is coming over again.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh. Oh right! Right! Because youre still seeing him and uh,hes a good guy. I mean, I remember a time when 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Are you okay?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah! Totally! Totally, and you?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Great! Its so amazing! I mean, last time Dr. Roger came over, Iwas so nervous, but then after being with you Im all like, "Can thedoctor see me now?"
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I bet he can.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow, I dont have an appointment, but I sure could use aphysical.  Are you sure youre okay?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh yeah! Yeah! Dont worry about me, Ill be fine! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh! My God! Barry!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Barry	 You-you-you said you were gonna be away all weekend!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh thats right! Im sorry! I-I am early! Finish! Please!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Surprise! Look whos back!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Arthur	 Hey Pheebs! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Arthur	  Call security.  Pheebs, didntyou get fired?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Uh, I dont think so!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 Phoebe?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Jack!! Hey!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 What are you doing here?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 All better! Back to work! Except this clown from research told me I wasfired. He should do his research, huh?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 Well, you were fired.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Nu-uh!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 I told that guy who answered your phone.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, okay I didnt get that message. So this doesntcountAnyway, Ill be in my office.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 Uh, Phoebe you-you dont have an office.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Thats all right, Ill work here. This is goo, next to thisplant. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	  Phoebe, listen
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Youre in my office! Look, I have made a lot of cash for thiscompany! Okay? I am talking big bucks! Pesos! Yen! Rubles! You make one littlemistake
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 You lost 13 million dollars.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, so this is all about money! Yknow its bad enoughthatOw! Oh, you have got to be kidding!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 Are you all right?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Im having another heart attack!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 What?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Im having another heart attack!! Call 9-1-1!!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Jack	 Take it easy. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Dumbass!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Woman	 Hey Pheebs! Hows it going?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well, they fired me and Im having heart attack.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Woman	 Wow! Well, welcome back!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hi Ross!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey Rachel.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Is Joey Tribbiani here?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Umm, no.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that Im looking forhim and that this I am not gonna throw up!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 That-thats always good news. Are you okay?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Me? Im great! Im fine! Im sooo good!! But, you knowwhos not great?! Men! Youre a man right Ross?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Sit down! 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay.  
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squatto you people?! And why is it that the second we tell you were going out oftown, bamn there you are in bed with the neighbors dog walker?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Were sorry.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 No seriously! Seriously! What has happened to the sanctity ofmarriage?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Didnt you spend last night at Joeys?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Aw what are you?! A detective?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Look I-I dont know whats going on with you and your husbandand what is hopefully an adult dog walker, look can I just say not all men are like that.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh. 
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey! There are some men who will do whatever it takes to make theirmarriage work! Okay? There are some men who will stand by and-and watch as their wivesengage in-in what only can be described as a twosome with some-some woman shebarely knows from the gym!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Who are these men?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Men. I guy I know.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife is gay.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 She is not  Shes gay. Oh my God. She is sogay! I cant believe this.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Good day for married people huh?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Im sorry your husband cheated on you.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Rachel	 Im sorry your wife is gay. I guess women arent that greateither.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Ross	 Try telling my wife that.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	  Okay to come in?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, come on, eat, whatever you want. Dr. Roger got beeped again.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah I know, guess who beeped him?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 What?!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Im the ruptured spleen.  
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Why would you do that?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Because you shouldnt be with him.  You should be withme.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Really?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah! When you were talking about Roger, that was killing me! Look,things like last night they dont just happen. Yknow? Or at least not to me. Orwith the other two women, in the morning yknow I was just lying there and Icouldnt wait to just go hang out with my friends, but with you I always yknowwith a friend.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler!
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 I know you probably dont want to go out with me, yknowbecause I make too many jokes and Ive never been in a serious relationship and Iguess Im not technically a "doctor"
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 There was just one woman, wasnt there?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 No, there were two.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Monica	 Including me?
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh yeah.
06	15-16	0615-16	The One That Could Have Been, Part I & II	Phoebe	 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Hey, remember when I had a monkey?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yeah.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yeah, what, what was I thinking?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  Hey! So, whats with the 20percent tip? Did I do something wrong?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Twenty percent is a pretty generous tip Joe.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Yknow whats more generous than that?! Fifty percent!Yknow whats even more generous than that?!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 I see where youre goin!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Whats up with the greed Joe?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 All right, look Im sorry you guys, but its just that I gottaget these new head shots made. And theyre really expensive, yknow? Imdown to like three! Well, actually two cause one of em I kinda blackened insome teethWhy did I do that?! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Well isnt there something you can do to earn a little extra money? Imean, cant-cant you pick up, I dont know, an extra shift here?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Or, yknow, I used to beg for money. Of course it helps ifyouve got yknow a little of this goin on. Wow! I still have it!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Oh, wait! Wait! Dont you have an audition today? Yeah! Maybeyoull get that job!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Oh, ha-ha-ha! Ooh! Wait a minute, I used to get medical experiments downon me all the time!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  Ah, finally an explanation.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 No-no! I used to get paid for all kinds of medical stuff, remember?Lets see uh, well I dont want to donate sperm again.  I really preferdoing that at the home office yknow?  Ooh-ooh, maybe they wantlike some of my blood or-or spit or something, huh?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Gunther	  Joey!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Yeah?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Gunther	 What did I tell you about talking to your friends while youreworking?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Uhh do it?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Gunther	 That guy  has been waiting for his coffee for ten minutes!Hes complained about you three times! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Well, where was I? 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Hi!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Hey, what have you guys been up to?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Ohh! We went to a self-defense class today!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Wow!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Yeah, kicking a guy in the crotch all morning really takes it out of ya!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Takes it out of you? 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Now, we can kick anybodys ass!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Yeah!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 After one class? I dont think so.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 What? You wanna see me self-defend myself?! Go over there  andpretend youre a sexual predator! Go on! I dare ya!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Well, of course you can defend yourself from an attack you know is coming,thats not enough. Look, I studying kara-tay for a long time, and theres aconcept you should really be familiar with. Its what the Japanese call  unagi.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Isnt that a kind of sushi?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 No, its a concept!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Yeah it is! It is! Its freshwater eel!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 All right, maybe it means that too
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Ohh! I would kill for a salmon skin roll right now!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yknow what? Fine! Get attacked! I dont even care! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	  Come on Ross. Were sorry. Please tell us what it is.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Unagi is a state of total awareness. Okay? Only by achieving true unagican you be prepared for any danger that may befall you!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 You mean in case someone is trying to steal your bamboo sleeping mat oryour kettle of fish?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	  All Im saying is, its one thing being preparedfor an attack against like each other; whole another story being prepared for an attack, Idont know, like a  surprise!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 All right, you know that one was coming, but that doesnt mean youhave unagi. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	  Ooh! Yknow what? If we made reservations, we couldhave unagi in about a half-hour.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yknow what 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Hey-hey, is Monica here?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 No.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 No.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay, look I need your help, I dont know what to get her forValentines Day.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Well, Valentines Day was like two weeks ago, so I wouldntget her a calendar!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  She was working on Valentines Day so werecelebrating it tonight.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Ohh, hey! Why dont you book a date for both of you at one of thoseromantic spas?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Ooh, Joey, thats actually a really good idea!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 And of course, crotchless panties. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Well appealing as that does sound to her boyfriend  and herbrother,  Icant do that we promised wed make each other gifts this year.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Aw, I love that.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 You guys!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 You cant make crotchless panties? You take, you take a pair ofscissors and you just cut
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	  Okay-okay-okay! So, making things. That sounds likeso much fun.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yeah, I thought so to until I paper mached one of my eyes shut.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Oh, I love paper mache! What did you make?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 I made a 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 What is that?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Nothing!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 So what are you gonna do?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Well, have you guys made anything that maybe I can take credit for?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Ohh! I have! I have! I started making these little sock bunnies!  Oh for crying out loud!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Hey, wait a minute! That is my sock!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Now, its you little bunny friend. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  This, this actually is a 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	  Hey!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Hey! Honey, can I ask you a question about the Valentines Daygifts?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Oh, yeah.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Do we have to make the entire thing?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Yes! Why, did youyou forget to make yours?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Of course, of course not. I just have to uh, go over to the placewhere I-I made it and pick-pick it up.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay.  Okay, I cant wait! This is going to be the bestValentines Day ever!  I cant believe it! Make thepresents! Make the presents!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  What?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Im just so excited to make the presents!  Shoot!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  Hi uh, Im Joey Tribbiani and with all dorespect Id like to donate some fluids.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Receptionist	 Were actually at the end of one of our research cycles, sowere not looking for applicants right now.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Oh thats too bad. Ive kinda been saving up.  Uh, are you sure theres no studies I can participate in?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Receptionist	 Well, heres a schedule of whats coming up. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Thanks.  Well but this one starts now. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Receptionist	 Oh that one is available now, but only identical twins areeligible. Its a twins study. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 But its $2,000.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Receptionist	 Sorry.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Well how about this one? Testing the effects of Joey Tribbiani onattractive nurse receptionists.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Receptionist	 We already got the results back on that on, and theyre notgood. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 DANGER!!! DANGER!!!!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Ross!!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 What the hell was that?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 A lesson in the importance of unagi. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Ohh, youre a freak!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Perhaps. Now Im curious, at what point during those girlish screamswould you have begun to kick my ass?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 All right, so we werent prepared!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Im sorry I had to take such drastic measures to make my point, butIlook, I just want you guys to be safe.  DANGER!!!!! Ahhh, huh? Unagi.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  2,000 bucks is a lot of money. Oh, I wish I had a twin.Where could I find someone who looks exactly like me? 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Hey.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	  Chandler. I sensed it was you.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 What?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Unagi. Im always aware.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay, are you aware unagi  is an eel?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Whats up?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 I cant figure out what to make Monica.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Oh, why dont you make her one of your little jokes.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Im going crazy! Okay? Do you have any thing around here thatlooks homemade?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yknow what? Shed-shed love this.  Uh, its anexact replica of Apollo 8. I made it in the sixth grade.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yeah, I guess I could use that. I could say that your love sends me tothe moon.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yeah-yeah, except Apollo 8 didnt actually land on the moon. Butyou-you-you could write that umm, your love lets me orbit the moon twice and returnsafely. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Wait a minute, I cant give this to her.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Why not?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Because it says "Captain Ross" on the side and "I hateMonica" on the bottom.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Oh.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe, Rachel	 DANGER!!!!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Ahhhhh, salmon skin roll. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay. Okay.  Yes honey, I made it myself.  I cant do it. I cant do it.  Oh! Oh! A mixed tape! Amixed tape!! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Hey! Hi! You uh, ready to exchange gifts?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Sure! Okay, you go first.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay, come here! Come here.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Now, its not wrapped because I just, just finished it.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 But I made you a tape of what I think are all romantic songs.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Oh, what a great gift! Is The Way You Look Tonight on it?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  Maybe well have to listen and see!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Oh, I love it! Thank you so much!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay, you ready to open yours?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yeah!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Its a sock bunny.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Yeah-yeah, you remember how I call you bunny?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Not really.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Well, I did one time, and-and I want to start doing it more. Seethats what this is about.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 I see. Yknow umm, Phoebe makes sock bunnies.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 No! No, she doesnt. Uh Phoebe, what she makesthatsuhtheyre sock rabbits. They are completely differentOkay! Okay! Okay! Ididnt make it! Im sorry! I totally forgot about tonight and the fact thatwere supposed to make the presents!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Oh, its okay. I dont
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 No-no, its not okay! Its not! I mean you were justYoure so incredible! You went through all this time and effort to make this tape forme! Yknow Im just gonnaI, I am gonna make this up to you! I will! I-I amgoing to cook anything you want in here , and I am going to doanything you want in there! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	  Well, I did put a lot of thought in the tape. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Wow!  You are way toyoung to have seen that!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Oops!  Yknow, your birthday is in amonth-and-a-half, what do you say I forget to get you a present for that too?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 You are totally and completely 100% forgiven.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 We have got to wash that! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yeah! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Do you remember that jacket that you love so much, that you thought wastoo expensive?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 You have done enough!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 I wanna wake up early and go get it for you!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 No you dontget it in black, not brown.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Oop, your cake is ready!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Oop!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Well, its like that old saying, have some sex, eat some cake.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey'S Look-A-Like	 Hey Mon! Hey Chann!  Justgettin a soda! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Who the hell are you?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey'S Look-A-Like	 Im Joey! How are you doin?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  No! No! No! No! No! How you doin?! How youdoinDamnit Carl! Go wait in the hall! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Look, I got to apologize on the behalf of Carl.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Who the hell is Carl?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Oh, did I not mention? Carl is a guy I hired to be my identical twin for amedical research project.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Yknow sometimes the good ideas are just right in front of you,arent they?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Okay, I know it sounds crazy, but I think it might work. Yknow? Theonly problem is, Carls acting is 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 The only problem!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Yeah, hes the reason I didnt get that big Minute Maidcommercial a couple of years ago remember? We were supposed to be brothers, but he messedit up.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Carl	  Hey, uh can I get a little piece of that cake?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  Pizza!! We like Pizza!! Get out!!! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Pat Sajak?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Yep!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Alex Trebek?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Oh, of course!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Chuck Woolery?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Definitely! Phoebe, you will not find a single game show host,whos ass I cannot kick.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Say it!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Say we are unagi!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Its not something you are! Its something you have!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Say it!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yknow what? I can easily get out of this, but there is a chance youcan get very, very hurt!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 All right Carl, were next. Now remember, what is not gonna be?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Carl	 Another Minute Maid fiasco.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Thats right! And what are you not gonna do?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Carl	 Well, Im not gonna talk because
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	  Damnit Carl! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Doctor	   Can I have the next one please? Joey and Tony Tribbiani. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Thats us.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Doctor	  But uh, this is a study foridentical twins.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Thats right, $2,000.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Doctor	 But, youre not identical twins.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Joey	 Damnit Carl!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Oh my good God.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Hey! Continuing the countdown of your favorite meals. Tonight, No. 3,macaroni and cheese with cut up hot dogs.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Look, you have done enough! Okay? You have to stop this now.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 I will! But not tonight. For dinner music, I thought we could listen tothat tape you made me.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Oh, the mixed tape.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 The Way You Look Tonight is on here! Dance with me?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 You are just the sweetest. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Janice	 I love the way you look every night Chandler!  Thats why I made you this tape! HappyBirthday! Love Janice!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 No! Youre the sweetest! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Okay ladies, that ends todays class, and letsremember, lets be safe out there. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Its a great class.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Thanks.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, I was watching. Umm, hey, a couple of questions though. Umm, about that-that-that last move where thewoman tripped you and then pinned you to the floor, what-what-what-what would you do next?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Well, she would take her keys and try to jam them
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 No. No-no. No. What would you do next?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Who? Me the attacker?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Yes thats right.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Why?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 I tired attacking two women, did not work.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 What?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 No, I mean its okay, I mean, theyre-theyre my friends.In fact, I-I-I was married to one of them.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	The Instructor	 Let me get this straight man, you attacked your ex-wife?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Oh, no! No-no! No, I tired! But I couldnt. Thats why Imhere. Maybe we could attack them together?  That-thats a no.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 I am so, so, so, so sorry!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	  Uh-huh.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 And I will cook anything you want in here , anddo anything in there! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	  Yeah you will!  And,are you kiddin me?!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Come on Monica, its our Valentines Day. Please?Please-please, please?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 Okay.
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 Okay. 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	JaniceS Voice	  My funny valentine, sweet comic valentine! Youmake me high over my heart!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Chandler	 So, are we going in there?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Monica	 I am!! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	JaniceS Voice	  Youre look for laughable
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 Ah-ha, nowhere to run! 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 I dont like sitting up here! Im just gonna over 
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	  No Rachel! They got here first!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 Why is Ross doing that?
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Ross	 DANGER!!!!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 Oh my God! Why is he jumping on those women!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Phoebe	 We should help him!
06	17	0617	The One With Unagi	Rachel	 I Well, I dont think they need any help.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Hey! I just got uh, my teacher evaluations! Check out what this onestudent wrote, "I loved Dr. Gellers class. Mind blowing lectures! Dr. Geller,you are definitely the hottie of the paleontology department!"
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Ahh, Hotties of the Paleontology Department, theres a bigselling calendar, eh?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Who wrote it?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh, I wish I knew, but the evaluations are all anonymous.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh hey, do you still have their final exams?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Yeah.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh, cause you can just match the evaluation to the exam with thesame handwriting and boom, theres your admirer. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 A hot girls at stake and all of the sudden hes Rain Man.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, why are we so sure that this is agirl?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Its a girl! Anyway, it wouit wouldnt matter. Okay?Because Im a teacher and shes a student.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh, is that against the rules?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 No, but it is frowned upon.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 I see.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Besides, theres a big age difference.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh, well think of it like this, when youre 90
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 I know when Im 90 shell be like 80 and it wont seem likesuch a big difference.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 No thats not what I was going to say at all. No, what I was going tosay is when youre 90 youll still have the memory of what it was like to bewith a 20-year-old.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey Chandler! Yknow that girl you went to college with who-whobecame a movie director?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh yeah, Dana Keystone. She was in my Movement class.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Whats a Movement class?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Its Chandlers way of pretending he didnt take mime.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh well listen, anyway shes directing the new Al Pacino movie. Yougotta get me an audition!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh, I dont know man. I havent talked to her in like tenyears.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 No-no-no, please-please Chandler I-I-I would owe you so much!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 You do owe me so much. You owe me three thousand, fourhundred
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey-hey dude, why are you changing the subject? Why? Will you make thecall or what?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh okay, Ill-Ill try.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 All right! Thanks! Youre the best! Now listen, the last day ofauditions is Thursday. Okay? So I gotta get in there by Thursday. Okay? Just rememberThursday. Thursday. Can you remember Thursday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Yeah so, Tuesday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	  Thursday! Look if you need help remembering think of like this,the third day. All right? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when? Huh? Whatday? Thursday! The third day! Okay?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Thank you.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Okay.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	  Hey Mon? Im gonna check my messages.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 You just thought of that in there?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Yeah sure, nature called, she wanted to see who else did.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	  Hello?  Uh, Rachel.  Great, someone is in our apartment. Call the cops!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Youre on the phone!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	  Oh my God! Oh my God! Thank you!  That was the firedepartment, there was a fire at our place!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Oh my God! How bad was it?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Well, he didnt say, but it was a fire. Im guessing not verygood. Come on, we gotta go!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Come on! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 What are you smiling about? What is so funny?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 The part I want to audition for is a fireman, this is so meant to be!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Burt	  Wow! It looks like you were very generous with yourgrades this semester! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Professor Geller?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	  Yeah?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 I wanted to say how much I enjoyed your class.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh thank you. Thanks very much.  Ow! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Uh, Im a little embarrassed about calling you a hottie on myevaluation
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 That was you?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Yeah. I felt a little weird about it. Youre a teacher. Im astudent. But would you maybe want to go out with me sometime?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh I, I dont-I dont think that would be the best idea.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Oh, because I was thinking, the semesters over; youre not myteacher anymore.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What time?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	  Oh, yknow what? Forget it, you already gave mean A.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Gotcha. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Im kidding!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh! So-so seriously, what time?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Coming through!  Oh! Coming through!  Oh! Hello! Hi!  No! Right! Coming through! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Oh well, its not so bad. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #1	 Yeah, most of the damage is pretty mostly contained in the bedrooms.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Oh!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 My God! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	  Hey buddy, do you think I can borrow your uniform thisThursday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #1	 Excuse me?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Joey! Hes working!  You would look good inthat.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh, how bad is it?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Oh, its bad. Its really bad. The only thing in there thatisnt burned is an ass. Which I do not remember buying!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Hows your room Rach?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Everythings ruined. My bed. My clothes. Look at my favorite bluesweater. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Isnt that mine?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Fine! Im sorry for your loss! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #1	 So uh, youre not gonna be able to live here for a while, youladies have a place to stay?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	  Wow! Oh-okay, look pal, I am not in the mood to behit on right now! But if you give me your number I will call you some other time.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	  Yes, they can stay with us.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Have you figured out what started the fire Mr. Fireman?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #1	 Well uh, do either of you smoke?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 No, not usually. But yeah, I could use one right now.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #1	 No-no-no, do you uh light candles? Burn incense?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Yes! I do! All the time! I love them! Oh my God! I did it! Its me!Its me! I burned down the house! I burned down the house!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Okay Phoebe calm down, theres no need to place blame. Okay?  I warned her about those candles.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 God, its great to catch up! I cant believe how longits been!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Chandler, is that 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Oh thats great! Good for you.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey-hey listen 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Okay! So yeah, maybe we can get together umm  Can you hold for one second please?  What?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 When youre off the phone, do you wanna get a pizza?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Hi! Im back.  Yeah, thatsounds great.  Okay. Well, well do it then.  Okay, bye-bye. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey listen, so whens-whens my audition? I mean I knowits Thursday, but what time?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Hi.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Hey!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  We didnt get to the audition. Im gonna take herto coffee and then well do it then.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Ah-ha!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Wow! So, now youre going on a date with this girl?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Honey, it is not a date! I havent talked to her in ten years!You cant just call up somebody you havent talked to in ten years and ask themfor a favor. There are rules, yknow? You gotta, you got to put in some time.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Youre right, Im sorry. Its not like youreyknow, going out with an ex-girlfriend.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 No, we only went out once.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 You dated her!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Not once!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 All right, well why dont I go out with an ex-boyfriend and do Joeya favor?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey, you wanna do Joey a favor, maybe you go out with Joey. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Oh thats great, my friend Joeys in the moviebusiness.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Yknow who I ran into from school? Howie.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  My friends name is Joey.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Apparently Howies editing now. Yeah, he-he-he calls me up and asksme if he can edit my new movie. Can you believe that?! Yknow I-I-I haventspoken to him in like ten years and he asks me for a favor!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Yeah, Ive always hated that Howie.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 No, no "How you doing?" Man, I mean not even a cup of coffeefirst!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 The nerve huh?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Yeah!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Refill?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Now, this is last minute so I want to apologize for the mess. Okay?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Oh my God! It sure didnt look this way when I lived here.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 I know! Now look, theres only one problem though. Theresonly room for one, so I guess one of you will have to stay at Joeys.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Well, since the fire was kinda my fault I guess  you shouldget to stay here.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Hey! Hey-hey, now this was no ones fault Pheebs. Okay? It was anaccident.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Well no, it was my fault so you should get the nice room.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Okay! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 So Rach! Youre the first guest at Hotel Monica! Umm, youlljust have to tell me how you like your eggs in the morning. And I thought I would bringthem to you, yknow, in bed. Oh, you have been through so much.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 I have.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 This right here is where I keep the pizza.  Anduh thats where the napkin is. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Whats that smell?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 I know! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Oh please! It was such a big class! You never even noticed me!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What? Of course I did! You uh, you sat next to Sleepy Sleeperson.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Who?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh uh, I had trouble remembering everyones name, so I-I kinda cameup with nicknames. Like the guy on the other side of you was Smelly von Brownshirt.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Oh yeah. So umm, did you have a nickname for me?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Umm, no. No.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Yes you did! What was it?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Umm, its Cutie McPretty.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Ohh thats so sweet!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Listen, I gotta tell ya, I-Im having a great time! Yknow howbefore you said it might be weird, the whole student teacher thing, and to be frank Ithought it would be too, but its not. I mean its not at all.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Burt	  Dr. Geller!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	  Burt!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 So did you sleep well last night?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 I did. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Yeah?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 I did, Monica was so sweet she left a little mint on my pillow.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Yknow what Joey left on my pillow?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 What?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Gum!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #2	 Well, we determined the cause of the fire.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Yeah I know, it was my candle. My candle!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #2	 No, there was an appliance left on in the bathroom. Its lookslike a curling iron.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 I dont use a curling iron.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #2	 Well someone does.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Well, dont look at me! My hairs straight! Straight!Straight! Straight!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Fireman #2	 It couldve been a hair straightener.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Oh.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 This is where I keep the pizza. AndHey! Where did the napkin go?! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Now there you go! I wouldnt want my best guest to strain her eyes!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Thanks Monica!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Does that smell bother you?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 What the smell from Joeys? No, I can hardly smell it over here.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Well you let me know if you can, because yknow I can bake a pie tocover it.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 I can smell it a little, bake the pie.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Okay!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Hello?  Oh yes, one minute please.  Its foryou. Its the fire inspector.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Oh!  Hello?  Yeah this is Phoebe. Really?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	  Yeah, so it turns out that it wasnt the hairstraightener that started the fire.  No-no, itwas the candles. Its very not good leaving candles unattended. In fact, one of thefirst things they teach you in fire school is  UhhUhh Okay. Well, I have to go now. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 We had such a great time! Shes-shes incredible! I thoughtthe-the age difference might be a problem, but it wasnt. It wasnt at all.Elizabeth is very mature for her age.  A concept lost on some people!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 So its okay to date a student.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Well, not really. I mean technically its-its not against therules or anything, but it is frowned upon. Especially by that professor we ran into lastnight, Judgey von Holierthanthou.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Well Ross, you be careful now. You dont want to get a reputationas yknow Professor McNailshisstudents. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Yeah. What-what should I do?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Well Ross, it seems pretty clear. I mean whats more important? Whatpeople think or how you feel, huh? Ross, you gotta follow your heart.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Joey that is so sweet.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Hey.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey! So, how did it go with Dana? Any reason I should leave ablock of time open say Thursday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 I couldnt do it.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 You couldnt do it?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Hey, relax I just need more time. Were going to dinner tonight.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 What?! Youre going out with her again!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Going out with who?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Uh, Dana Keystone from college.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh yeah! Wasnt she uh 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 No, that was Dana Caplin.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	The Guys	 Ohhhh! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Joey! You didnt even know her!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Ah whatever!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Great story again! The yarns that you weave! Woo-hoo-hoo!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Yknow uh, actually I-I-I should get going.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no! Stay! Stay! Because you-you should you-you-you shouldstay!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Wow. Oh, I am really flattered, but I just I dont feel that wayabout you.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, thats notNo-no-no!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Im sorry Chandler, yknow you are such a sweet guy and I, Idont want to hurt you. Oh, I wish there was something I can do to make you feelbetter.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 No-noReally?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Of course!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Well, it just hurts so bad. I uh
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Ohh, Im sorry.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Well maybe there is one thing you can do.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 What?! Anything! Anything! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Well, I umm, I mean this is just off the top of my head now, umm but Ihave this friend. This actor friend and he would kill me if he thought I was doing thisumm, but umm would it be possible for him to get an audition for your movie say onThursday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Dana	 Absolutely! But you-you would really feel better about me rejecting you ifyour actor friend can audition for my movie?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Well, the heart wants what it wants. Ill see you later. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Hey! Hows it goin?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Well, not much has changed in the last five minutes.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Yes it has! I made cookies!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Oh thats all right. Im still full from your homemade potatochips.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 But you should eat them now because theyre hot from the oven.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Okay. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	  Oh-ho! But not in here! Cant eat emin bed, remember? No crumbies!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	  Okay, Ill be out in a second.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	 Okay!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Monica	  What are you doing?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 That doesnt lock does it?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Oh, Joey! Sorry!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 No thats all right. Dont worry about it.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Oh but look! Thats gonna leave a stain! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Rach! Hey! Its fine! Youre at Joeys!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Really?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Yeah! Look! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Ive never lived like this before.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 I know.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 All right, dont waste it, I mean its still food. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What do you want to do now? Huh? You wanna go get a drink?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Uhh, I cant.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Oh, you have some studying to do?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 No, I have some turning 21 to do.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Yknow I remember when uh, when I was in college, we used to
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 What are you doing?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Nothing, Im-Im just, Im so comfortable with you!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Do you not want to be seen with me?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What? No! Of course, of course I do! Are-are they gone?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Uh no, theyre still here but I think Im about to leave.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What?! No! No! Wait! Youre right, this is stupid. Who cares whatpeople think? I mean, I mean we like each other right? Theres nothing wrong withthat. Come on. Burt? Lydia? Mel? This is Elizabeth.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Hi!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Lydia	 Arent you in my Popular Culture class?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Thats right Lydia, Elizabeth here is a student and uh, weredating. And you may frown upon that, but were not gonna hide it anymore.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Mel	 You are so fired.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Burt	 Theyre gonna fire you! You cant date a student! Itsagainst the rules.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Really? Its not just frowned upon?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 I love it at Joeys!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey, here you go. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  Ni-hi-ice! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Thanks!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	  So, you busy Thursday?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Oh, very funny. I dont know if you remember, but my audition wassupposed to be Thursday. You got me the audition?! Lets hug it up! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Okay. Okay.  What are you gonna do to me if youget the part?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	  Hey! Hi!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Hi!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	  Listen umm, yeah okay, I need to talk to you!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Now I know that they said that the umm, the hair straightener startedthe fire but I think Im partly at fault. You see, I didnt, I didnt tellyou but umm, but I-I had recently refilled the tissues and so yknow lets justface it, thats just kindling! So I think its better that I stay atJoeys.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 No, no-no-no. Phoebe, this was my fault and besides yknow what?Im fine here.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Okay. Oh umm, Chandler, Monica is looking for you.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Really?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 Yeah she said something about crumbies.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 No! No! No! I was so careful! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	  Okay, you have to switch with me! Monica is driving mecrazy!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Thats right, all the ladies want to stay at Joeys.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 No! No! Phoebe, come on! I dont want to switch! Please come on! Ican throw wet paper towels here!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 No but at Monicas you can eat cookies over the sink!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Rachel	 I know. Im sorry.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 All right fine! This looks like so much fun. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Yeah. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Phoebe	 God, what a mess. 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Wow! It actually is in the handbook. I cant date you or have a hotplate in my office. I cant believe we have to stop seeing each other.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 For what its worth I did appreciate you standing up for me. Itfelt really nice. It kinda made me like you even more.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 I know, I know I really like you too. But we-we cant date. Itsagainst the rules. Its forbidden.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Wow!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 What?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Just hearing you describe it as forbidden, its really hot.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Really?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Yeah.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Well I-I-I dont care how hot it is its-its uh, itswrong.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Stop it! 
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	  No! No! Its wrong! Its-its-itsnaughty. Its taboo.
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Elizabeth	 Shut the book!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Ross	 Lets also get a hot plate!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Hey!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Hey!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 So?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 So?
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Chandler	 Its Thursday! How was the audition?!
06	18	0618	The One Where Ross Dates A Student	Joey	 Wh? Monday, one day. Tuesday, two day. Wednesday, when huh what?Thurs Oh! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Well that thing is clearing in the way! All right. Ah-ha!  Ah-ah!! Damn fridge! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Hi Joey, how ya doin?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Great! Roomie!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Huh, yeah I guess we are roommates now.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Yeah! Well, now that you brought it up, our fridge is broken. We have toget a new one. Now, I checked around and your half is $400. Thanks a lot.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Im not paying for half of that! Im only staying here untilmy apartment gets fixed.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Look Rach, my parents bought this fridge just after I was born, okay? Now,I have never had a problem with it. Then you show up and it breaks! What does thattell ya?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 That refrigerators dont live as long as people.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 All right, now you know that the ATM will only lets you take out 300 at atime, Ill take a check for the other hundred.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Youre jokin right?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Of course Im jokin! I dont take checks.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Thank God youre pretty. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	 Hi! Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Do you guys know any cute guys?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Well, of course I do! My good friend Joey over here. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Oh, Im sorry. Thank you Chandler.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Anyway, theres this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Laurenbought a table, so I kinda have to go
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Whats the charity?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I dont know, something either trees or diseaseRalph mumblesa lot.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Does Ralph mumble when youre not paying attention?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Yeah! Its weird. But the thing is need to find a date.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Well, what kind of guy are you looking for?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent atux.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 So he has to be a male who has at least $50.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Ooh! So close.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hey everybody!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	 Hi!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hey uh, this is Elizabeth.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh hi!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	 Hi!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Im the student.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	  Isnt she cute?  No!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yknow, this is probably none of my business, but werent youguys supposed to not be seen in public together?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh, were not together.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Oh no-no-no, were just two people who happen to run into each otherhere at the coffee house. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh, sly.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Well, I really wanted to meet you guys, but I have to run. Illsee you later?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	 Okay!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Bye Ross.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Bye.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oops! I did not mean to run into you like that sir.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Oh that is quite all right maam. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 So, why is she leaving? Is it a school night and she has a lot ofhomework to do?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Yes, her molecular epidemiology paper is due tomorrow.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Oh, tell her good luck with that.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Anyone else? Huh? Bring em on!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oo! Whens her birthday?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 I dont know Rachel, why?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Well, yknow its just been so long since Ive been to ChuckieCheese.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Oh, I like Elizabeth.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well thanks!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Yeah. In fact, I like her so much you tell her I want my cookies earlythis year! Yknow, a box of Thin Mints and some Tag-a-Longs.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Hey-hey come on you guys, give him a break. Ross, seriously, hows itgoing with her?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well, actually its been great. Shes 20 so shes notlooking for anything too serious, which is perfect for me right now.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Well that is great. And seriously, she seems very nice.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Thanks. I know you guys like to give me a hard time and all, but it reallymeans a lot to me that you like her. Just knowing that you guys are
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	  Okay, I got a good one. Okay, umm, what is she? Like 12?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Chandler, do you think we talk about our relationship enough?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Yeah. Do we have any Fruit Roll-Ups?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	  Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Okay, I just thought of the perfect guy for Rachel to take to her thing.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Oh thats so funny because we found someone too.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh thats good, I guess shell have a choice between my guyand your weirdo.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Why would our guy be a weirdo?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Cause thats just your taste.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	  Rachel is not going to pick your stupid guy.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh yeah?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Yeah!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 My guy is a lawyer who has volunteer work. And, he has one of these 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 A face ass?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 A chin dimple!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Well, uh yknow, our guy works with Chandler and hes reallynice and smart and hes a great dresser!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Have you seen your guys body?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 No, our guy is just a floating head.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Well my guy is spectacular. Okay? Hes a massage client and onetime umm, when he was on the table, I looked at it. And I mean all of it.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Youre not supposed to look!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, like there are police for that!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	  Wait! You look? You-you massaged me.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 I know. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 All right fine, your guy may have a great body, but our guy is reallyfunny.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh, Chandler funny?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Our guys a great dancer!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 My guy is well read.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Our guy has great hair.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 My guy has great teeth!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Our guy smells incredible.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	  Do you want our guy to be your guy?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Hey.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Huh.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Well, youdont look good Joe.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream,limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Thats still in there?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Not anymore. So anyway, how do you want to pay me?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Is this a service youre providing me?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 No! No! No! For my new fridgeour new fridge!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Our new fridge? I dont live here anymore.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 So what? Look, suppose we were a divorced couple.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Uh-huh.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 And I got custody of the kid, right? Now suppose the kid dies and-and Igotta buy a new kid.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Okay
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	  Give me $400!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Professor Geller?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hmm?  Oh, a student I dontknow.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 I was wondering if I could talk to you for a moment?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Yes, yes of course, what-what would this be regarding?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Making out in your office.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Shh!  Of course, why dont we goinside?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Oh-ooh!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 What?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Doorknob! Doorknob!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh! Sorry! Umm, I actually do need to talk to you.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Oh, okay. What-what about?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Spring vacation.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Spring vacation.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Yeah, we have time off and a lot of people are going on trips
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Professor Feesen	 Professor Geller!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	  Yes, professorFeesen-sen-stenlger Ill be with you in one moment.  So, I willtake one box of the Thin Mints. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 You dont understand! Elizabeth was about to ask me to go on a tripwith her! Is that taking it slow?! No, Im not ready for this! Okay? What-what do Itell her?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Just tell her the truth! Tell her youre not ready.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 I can do that. Oh-oh, what if she gets upset?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Then you distract her with a Barbie doll.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Or! You can just, yknow 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 What the hell are you doing?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 What? What the hell am I doing? You just broke my fridge!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 What?! What? How do you, how do you even know its broken?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Oh-ho-ho, you think I dont know what breaks my fridge? Excuse me! Well what do you know! Broken! Thatll be $400!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Joey, I saw you push him!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	  You pushed him!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Joey, I did not break this! Okay?  That has been broken for a while.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 All right. Chandler, do you remember how I told you about our fridge?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Uh-huh.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 I still havent gotten a check for your half yet.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Do not give him any money!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Im not talking to you! You broke my fridge!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 You wanted to see me Professor Geller?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Yes. Yes! Please, come in.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Oo-oo!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Doorknob?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Yeah, it kinda grows on you.  Actually, I wanted tofinish talking to you about uh, spring vacation.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh good.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Look, I  Look, Im havinga great time with you and I just dont want us to move to fast or put to muchpressure on us. So, Im sorry I just dont think we should go away together yet.Its-its too soon.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Ross, I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I just wanted totell you that Im going to Florida for a couple weeks.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 No. I think you misunderstood what I was saying. What I meantwas
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 You are so adorable.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 That! Lets talk about that.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Hey! How did it go with Elizabeth?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Huh? Oh-oh, it was fine. Uh, it was just a misunderstanding. Shedidnt want me to go with her. She just wanted to let me know that shes goingto Florida for spring vacation.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Wait a minute, is she going for spring vacation or is she going forspring break? 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Whats-whats the difference?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Well, spring vacation is doing nice things with your grandparents.Spring break youre doing frat guys.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hey, yknow what? Not all spring breaks are like that.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 What did you do on yours?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 I went to Egypt with my dad.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 I can see it now, "Look dad, its the Sphinx!" 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Hey, I think Elizabeth is a little more serious than, "Springbreak!"  All right? I mean shes taken my class!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 And slept with the professor.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Im gonna call her.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Yeah.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Hey! You guys umm, I want you to meet Sebastian.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Hi.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. We both grabbed for the last Field& Stream.  What? I read that.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Can I get you a cup of coffee?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh yes! Thank you! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Rachel, what the hell is this?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	  What?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 You ask us to find you a guy and you come traipsing in here with yourown!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 You found me a guy?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Yes! We found you a really cute and funny guy from Chandlers work!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah and I-I found you one too who is not a weirdo.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Well, yknow what though you guys? I really appreciate that but Ithink Im just gonna take Sebastian to the charity.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Are you sure?! Because our guy smells incredible!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Uh, would you stop it with that already?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Here you go. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh, thank you.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Sure.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 So, Sebastian, do you do any volunteer work?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Uh, no not really. Why?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 No reason, its just I know a single guy that cares about otherpeople.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Are you funny?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Excuse me?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 What are you guys doing?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Are you funny? Tell us a joke!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Look, I just wanted to have coffee with Rachel.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Well, so do a lot of people.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Actually, I uh, I gotta get going.  Give me a callsometime.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh, but yknow, no, you didnt give me your phone number.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Sebastian	 Okay! See you later! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	  Turns out he is kinda funny. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I cannot believe you guys! He was really nice and he left because ofyou!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Yeah, but Sebastian? What is that? A cats name?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah, yknow what I noticed Rachel? He scares easy. Is that thekind of guy youd like to take to a ball? "Hey Sebastian, would you like todance?"  "Uhh, okayI gotta go!"
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 All right guys stop it. Rachel, were very sorry that is a veryinsensitive thing for us to do. And yknow what? Let us make it up to you, we havetwo really great guys for you.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah! What have you got to lose? Yknow you might even end up withsomeone really special  if you pick my guy.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 All right.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Okay, so you will meet our guys?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Yes, Ill meet em.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Okay now it doesnt matter which one you choose, yknow?Its completely up to you. Our guy is perfect, or you can go out with the guy Phoebedeemed not good enough to go out with herself.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	  Pheebs! There you are! Okay, you broke my fridge; you owe me400 bucks!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Okay sure!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Really?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Ooh, technically you owe me $600 for sending out happy thoughts on yourlast ten auditions.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Call it even?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Okay.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	  Well, there you are! So what did Elizabeth say?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well, it turns out that she is going to Daytona for spring break woo-hoo.That means, that means wet T-shirt contests, guys doing shots off of girls bodies,waking up next to people you dont even know
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Man, she is going to have a great time! Is she staying at the HotelCorona?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 You know the hotels?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Sure! I was there! Spring Break 81! Woo-hoo!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 In 1981 you were 13!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 So what? I drove down, sold T-shirts, had a blast. And yknow whoknows how to party? Drunk college chicks.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Okay, she cant go.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Ross, you cant tell her not to go. You just started dating.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Then what am I supposed to do?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Nothing, you just have to be cool with it.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well, what is she goes down and-and sleeps with a bunch of guys?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Well, maybe you dont marry this one.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Im so glad youre going on this trip!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Yeah! Ive been working so hard this semester. I really need togo crazy yknow, blow off some steam.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Sure. Sure. Look I dont, I dont know if your plans arefinalized yet, but umm, hey I-I know another great way to blow off steam.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 What?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Are you into crafts at all?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Ross, are you okay?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well, yeah, of-of course Im okay! What? Im just beingsupportive. Supportive of you and this whole trip, and-and  what-whatis uh, whats this? 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Its a bathing suit?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 To wear in front of people?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Is that supportive?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Is this?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Good-good-good-good.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Hi!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Were really glad you decided to meet our guy.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Youre gonna like him so much. So umm, when do you want to meethim?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I dont know. I know I dont work late tomorrow night.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Tomorrow night is good. Tomorrow night is good, but uh, yknowwhat? Why put off something till tomorrow that you can do right now?  Eldad comehere! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 What?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Eldad, this is Rachel.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Eldad	 How are you?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Well-well a little blind sided but yknow good.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Eldad, sit down.  Move over! Move over now!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 IOhh! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 There you go! There you are! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Okay! Okay! We can take a hint!   What are you doing here?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 This is Patrick. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Patrick	 Hi.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Hi.  Okay, youre too late okay? Because shesalready with our guy.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	  Oh my God, youre right! I am too late; theyresitting on the couch and talking!  Come on! Rachel?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Yeah?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 This is Patrick.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh, hi.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Patrick	 Hi.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah, this is the guy I was telling you about. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Yeah?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah. And believe me, this suit does not do justice to whatsunderneath it.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh-okay, but Pheebs?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Im just sort of in the middle of something.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh! Okay! Yeah, thats okay.  Have a seat. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 No! You cant do that!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Eldad	 Maybe I should go!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	  Sit down! Were winning!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Okay, yknow what? Maybe I should go!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	  No-no-no-no! Have a seat! Have a seat!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Rachel! Rachel! You havent touched Eldads hair!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 It is the softest hair! Touch it! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Yeah, Im good.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Rachel? Patrick is really rich.  Give her some money.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Patrick	 Yknow what Phoebe? This isnt really worth the free massage.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Monica	 Thats right Patrick, bye-bye!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	  Eldad is much more cooperative! And he can dance!  You dance for Rachel!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 No-no! Dont dance for me! Please? Dont!  What is the matter with you guys?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay, lets talk it out.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I Am I the only one that this is embarrassing for?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Eldad	 Im a little embarrassed. 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Ill tell ya who should be embarrassed! Its you guys! Comeon! This is ridiculous! Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Then why did she ask us to
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I am still talking!! And then you chase away the one guy that I actuallyliked! I mean, no offense to you guys. Really! I mean  congratulations on allthe cash,  and-and yknowWow! You dohave very soft hair! But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go throughanymore of this! Good-bye!  Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Eldad	 Yes, Papaya Extract.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Thank you! 
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 So uh, have a great time down there.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 I will.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Yeah. And did you, did you pack that bathing suit?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Yeah.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 It was pretty funny when I, when I hid it for a while, huh? Anyway, umm,I-I am worried about that bathing suit, not because its revealing which Imfine with, no Im concerned about your health, sun exposure.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh, dont worry I have plenty of sun block, its SPF-30.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Well, if whats in the bottle is actually 30. I mean sometimes youget 30, sometimes its-its get 4, and I swear to God more often than notits just milk.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Ross, its going to be okay. Im not going down there tohook up with a bunch of guys. I really like you. I like how things are going between us.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Really?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Yeah! Im just going down there to relax and hang out with myfriends.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Okay. Cool.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Elizabeth	 Oh hey! Here they are!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Guy	 Elizabeth!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Ross	 Call me!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Rachel, were sorry for pushing those guys on you.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh thats all right! Yknow, I ended up having a really goodtime. Yknow, the charity was a big success and they raised a lot of money andawareness.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 So what was it for anyway?
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 I wanna say a disease.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	  Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	All	 Hey!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 I just got this really weird message from Ross. He said turn on MTV.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Huh. All right.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Phoebe	 Oh my God, look! Thats Elizabeth!
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Rachel	 Oh-oh Professor Geller.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Joey	 Ahh, to be 13 again.
06	19	0619	The One With Joey's Fridge	Chandler	 Yeah.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 The reactors gonna blow in three seconds, were never gonnamake it!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Youve got to get out of here! Save yourself!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 No! I wont leave you!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Dont worry about me, Im a robot! Im just a machine!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 No youre not! Not to me!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Oh my God.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 What?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 I am extremely talented!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah, youre great! Okay, lets take it from
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  No, I mean I was really acting my ass off.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah, I thought I was pretty good too.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, youre solid. Yeah, youre just no me.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yknow what? I think thats enough for now. Yeah. I dontwant to be over rehearsed.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Fine! Ill do it without you!  I dont need you or anybody else! Im gonna make it on my own! Youll see!! Youll all see!! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  So uh, whats this thing youre auditioning for?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Oh, its a new TV show. Yeah. Im up for the part of MacMacaveli or "Mac." Yeah, Im a detective and I solve crimes with the helpof my robot partner. Hes a, hes a Computerized Humanoid ElectronicallyEnhanced Secret Enforcer or-or "C.H.E.E.S.E."
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 So Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Thats the title! Yeah! Yknow they really lucked out that theinitials spell cheese.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 That is lucky.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 HuhWait so Joey if you get this, youre gonna be like thestar of your own TV show! I mean youll be like the Big Cheese!  Or theBig MacHey! You love those!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Well, dont get your hopes up, because probably not gonna happen.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Now-now, why would you say that Joseph?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 I mean come on you guys! My own TV show? I just dont know ifIm good enough.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 I am.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Joey, what are you talking about? Youre a terrific actor.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 You really think so?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Ugh, how can you even ask that question?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Whoa, she's pretty. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Yeah, and oh she's really nice too. She taught me all about how towork the cameras, and smell-the-fart acting.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	  I'm sorry, what?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  What?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  Excuse me?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  It's like, you got so many lines to learn so fast, that sometimesyou need a minute to remember your next one. So while you're thinkin' of it, you take thisbig pause where you look all intense, you know, like this. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Oh, ok.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  There's my scene, there's my scene.  "Mrs. Wallace, I'm Dr. Drake Ramoray, your sister's neurosurgeon.  I'mafraid the situation is much worse than we expected. Your sister is suffering froma..." 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Vell, Eva, ve've done some excellent vorkhere, and I vould have to say, your pwoblem is qviiite clear.  
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  I play Al Pacino's butt. All right? He goes into the shower, andthen- I'm his butt.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Oh my God.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  C'mon, you guys. This is a real movie, and Al Pacino's in it, andthat's big!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh no, it's terrific, it's- it's- y'know, you deserve this, after allyour years of struggling, you've finally been able to crack your way into show business.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Okay, okay, fine! Make jokes, I don't care! This is a big break for me!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 You're right, you're right, it is.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Yes.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  So you gonna invite us all to the big opening?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 All right well, Im outta here. Wish me luck.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	   Gooood luck! Goooodluck! We all wish you good luuuuuuuuck!!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah, whatever. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Its your turn.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh, are we playing this?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Hey.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Hey! Howd the audition go?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Terrible! I messed up every line! I shouldnt even bean actor!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Wait a minute, are you doing that thing where you pretend it didntgo well but it really did go well?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah, did I fool ya?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Totally!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 So it did go well.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Oh, it went amazingly well!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Great!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh thats great!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, its down to me and two other guys.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh my God!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Wow!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 And I know both of them, theyre really good. One of them is the guyfrom those allergy commercials whos always getting chased by those big flowers
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Oh, I love that guy! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh-oh, what are you doing?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  What am I doing?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Im just so nervous! Yknow? The callback isnt untiltomorrow at five. I feel like my head is going to explode!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Well, it is overdue.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Look, dont worry. Okay? Youre gonna be fine.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Theres just so much pressure. I mean no offense, but what you guysdo is very different. I dont know if youd understand.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Yeah, none of us have to deal with pressure at our jobs.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Yes, Fran. I know what time it is, but I'm looking at theWENUS and I'm not happy!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Alright, well I'm tearing the lettuce.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  Uh-huh. Is it dirty?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Oh-oh, no no don't worry, I'm gonna wash it.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  Don't, I like it dirty.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  That's your call.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  So, uh, what are you going to do next?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Well, I thought that I would cut up the tomatos.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  Are they, uh, firm?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  They'r alright.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  You sure they haven't gone bad? You're sure they're not very,very bad?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  No really, they're OK.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  You gonna slice them up real nice?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Actually, I was gonna do them jullienne.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Interviewer	  Aaaahhhhhhh.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  I'm outa here. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	   Monica, Im quitting! I just helped an 81 yearold woman put on a thong and she didnt even buy it!  Im telling youIm quitting! Thats it! Im talking to my boss right now!  Yes Iam!  Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Yes I am! Okay bye, call me when youget this message. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Well, what happened?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Well, he came in for a massage and everything was fine until...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	All	  Ohhhhhh!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  Oh my God!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  And all of the sudden his hands weren't the problem anymore. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Was it...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Oh, Boy Scouts could've camped under it!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 You ate my sandwich?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Dr. Leedbetter	 It was a simple mistake. It could happen to anyone.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  Oh-oh really? 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Dr. Leedbetter	 Now-now calm down. Come look in my office, some of it my stillbe in the trash.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  What?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Dr. Leedbetter	 Well, it was quite large. I-I-I-I-I had to throw most of itaway.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 You-you-you-you  threw my sandwich away!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	   MY SANDWICH?!!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 MY SANDWICH!!!!!! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 I want this part so much! Yknow? If I dont get this partIm never gonna eat Macaroni and Cheese again!No, I didnt saythat! Thats a lie.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh come on guys, its not like I moved to Europe! I just movedacross the hall! And we would have you over all the time if it werent for Monicas allergies.  Youre right,I could never lie to you. She hates you.  Should I get that?  Hello?  Uh no, Joeys not here right now. Can Itake a message?  Yeah, okay so the audition has been moved from 5:00 to 2:30? Okay great.  Bye. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	  Ahh! Arent you dressed yet?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Am I naked again?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Were supposed to meet my parents in 15 minutes.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Yeah okay, I was just talking to the guys. Just look at them I mean,is it okay if they come visit?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Wh?! What about my allergies?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh right, your allergies. All her, she hates you. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yes!! Ha-ha!! All right! Hey! How cool would it be if you could watch likea real life-sized version of this? Huh? I mean how crazy would that be?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 As crazy as soccer?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Hello?  What are you talking about? Theauditions not til 5:00!  Well, nobodytold me!  Whod you talk to?  Nevermind! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 You mean you didnt get it from this?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 The allergy guy got the part! Thanks!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Well, maybe we can fix it yknow? Maybe we can send him some-somebig-big flowers and scare him!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 How could you do this to me Chandler?! This part couldve turned mywhole career around!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 I messed up. Okay? Im sorry, I really messed up.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Hey, you dont even live here anymore! What are you doing answeringmy phone? I have my machine!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Which I bought for ya. Taught ya how to use it. You thought it was acopier. Look, if there was anything I could do, I would do it. Okay? But everybodysallowed one mistake, right?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  You know he coulda gotten me a VCR, he coulda gotten me a set ofgolf clubs, but no, he has to get me the woman repeller!  The eyesore from theLiberace house of crap!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  It's not that bad.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Oh, yeah, easy for you to say, you don't have to walk aroundsporting some reject from the Mr. T collection. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Chandler, Chandler.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  I pity the fool who puts on my jewelry, I do, I do. I pity thefool that. . .  Hi!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Yeah, I mean when you were late last night, Kathy and I got totalking, and one thing to another and
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  And what?! Did you sleep with her?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  No! No! No! I just kissed her.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  What?!! Thats even worse!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  How is that worse?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  I dont know! But its the same!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Youre right, I have no excuses! I was totally over theline.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Over the line?! You-youre-youre so far past the line,that you-you cant even see the line! The line is a dot to you!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Look, Im not saying that you should magically forgive me! Butyoure not perfect! Youve made some errors in judgment too!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Name one!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  What happened?!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Awww, man! He promised he wouldnt take the chairs!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  What the hell happened?!! How were you locked in?!! And wherethe hell is all of our stuff?!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Well, this guy came by to look at the unit and-and he said hedidnt think big enough to fit a grown man!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  So--You got in voluntarily?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  I was tryin to make a sale!! Oh, man, if I ever run into thatguy again, do you know what Im gonna do?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  BEND OVER?!!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Lorraine	 Hi, Joey.  Well well, look what you brought.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 ...And what did you bring?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Lorraine	 She's checking the coats. Joey, I'm gonna go wash the cabsmell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Janice?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Janice?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Janice	 Oh.... my.... God.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Joey's tailor...took advantage of me.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 What?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 No way!  I've been going to the guy for 12 years.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh come on!  He said he was going to do my inseam, and he ran hishand up my leg, and then, there was definite...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 What?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Cupping.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 That's how they do pants!  Ross, will you tell him? Isn't that howthey measure pants?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Yes, yes it is. In prison!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 I said name one!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 I cant believe I did this! What an idiot!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Oh, stop beating yourself up! People make mistakes! These things happen!There arent any message youve forgotten to give me are there?  Apparently youre not very good at it! I
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Do you think hell ever forgive me?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Of course he will! But Chandler the most important thing is you forgiveyourself!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Yknow what? I-I kinda have.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Already? Thats pretty bad what you did.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Yknow what? He will forgive you. And I like to bring a padwith me when I go answer the phone just in case  Okay
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 You didnt see how mad he was, yknow?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Im sure he will forgive you. Look, we have all been there!Yknow, you fight, you make up, its just the way it works.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 It took two people to break up this relationship!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Yeah! You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you tookfull responsibility for!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 I didnt know what I was taking full responsibility for! Okay?! Ididnt finish the whole letter!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 What?!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 I fell asleep!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	  You fell asleep?!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 It was 5:30 in the morning, and you had rambled on for 18 pages. Front andback!!  Oh-oh-oh, and by the way, Y-O-U-apostrophe-R-E means you are,Y-O-U-R means your!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Y'know I cant believe I even thought about getting backtogether again! We are so over!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	  FINE BY ME!! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 And hey! Just so you know, its not that common! It doesnthappen to every guy! And it is a big deal!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  I KNEW IT!!!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 You had no right to go out with him.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 That is the most ridiculous...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 You sold me out.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 I did not sell you out.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Yes you did.  You absolutely sold me...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Would you let me talk. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Did you just flick me?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus- 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Oh!  All right.  Now, let's not do this!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Happy thoughts!  Happy thoughts!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 OK, now I'm gonna kick some ass.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica, Rachel	 Ow! Ow! Ow!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 I know!  I know!  I know! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Alright, now I will let go if you both stop.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Rachel	 Fine!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Monica	 Fine!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 There we go.You know what, if we were in prison, you guys would be,like, my bitches.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Okay, buddy-boy. Here it is. You hide my clothes, I'm wearing everythingyou own.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh my God!  
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Look at me! I'm Chandler! Could I be wearing any more clothes?Maybe if I wasn't going commando...
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah. Whew, it's hot with all of this stuff on. I ah, I better not do any,I don't know, lunges. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Joey? Got you a Joey Special, two pizzas! Joe?   Hello?  Damnit!  Hello?  No, Joeysnot here right now, but I can take a message I think.  Hes still got achance for the part?! Oh, thats great news!  Well no obviously not for theactor who was mauled by his dog.  Oh well, thats great. I will give Joeythe message. Thank you! Yes!  Okay, Mac audition at 2:00. Allergy actor attacked. By dog not flowers.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Hey!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Please tell me you got the message!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 What message?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 The actor playing Mac couldnt do it, they needed to see you at 2oclock.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 What?! Its 6 oclock!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Du-du-I wrote it, I wrote it on the board! I wrote it on the board,then I went all over New York City looking for ya! I went to Rosss! I went to thecoffeehouse! I went to any place that they made sandwiches!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 I cant believe this Chandler!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Sorry! I-I-I dont know what to say.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Well you-you-you-you might say congratulations! I saw the board! I went tothe audition! I got the part!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	  Is that supposed to be funny! I was really worried overhere!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Oh, well Im uh
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Yknow, sometimes that fake out thing is just mean!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Oh wow! Okay man, Im sorry. I did not mean to make you feel bad.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Well thats good. Because you didnt! And Imincredibly happy for ya!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	  Thats mean! You really had me going there!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 Oh, we could do this all day.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah, youre right. Okay look, listen, lets talk about what ahuge star Im gonna be!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 You are gonna be a huge star! Im gonna hug ya!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 You hug me!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 All right!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Hey, do we do this too much?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Chandler	 I think so. Yeah, get off me.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yeah.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Come on C.H.E.E.S.E., Im not leaving without you! Try routing yourbackup source through your primary CPU.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  I cant! My circuits are fried! Theyrefried I tell you!!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Wow!  Well then Ill just have to carryyou.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Thatll be a neat trick, when youre,  whenyoure dead!
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Ross, you dont have to yell.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 There was just an explosion, okay? My hearing would be impaired. 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 I thought you were excellent! In fact for a minute there I was like,"Ooh, whered Ross go?"
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Thank you! And I have to say that first scene when you meet Mac
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	 Yeah?
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Oh my God. I mean
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Joey	 Yknow what? I think thats enough for today. Thanks for yourhelp! 
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Phoebe	  Hes holding us back.
06	20	0620	The One With Mac And C.H.E.E.S.E.	Ross	 Totally.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Okay, Chandler!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Okay.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 And your horoscope says, "On the fifth a special someone is goingto give you a gift."
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	  Oh, well thank you in advance. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Op, but the twelfth brings a lovers spat.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	  You are going to make a joke about my specialpresent! Why would you do that?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh, wait and on the nineteenth a secret crush announces itself.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	  Hey guys!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hey!!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  Oh my God! Its Joey Tribbiani of Mac andC.H.E.E.S.E.!!!!!!!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Oh thats right. Its your first day! So are you psyched tofight fake crime with your robot sidekick?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Am I psyched? The lead in my own TV series? Ive dreamed about thisfor years! Why have I not been preparing?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 No! Joey, youre going to be great!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 But I got to act with a robot Pheebs, and-and I dont know anythingabout technology! I cant even use Chandlers computer except to find porn!And-and thats only cause its right there when you turn it on!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 I think our lovers spat will start a little early this month.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  Ill be waiting.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Are you judging them by their covers? Because youre really notsupposed to do that.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 No, Im just deciding which one to useIm gonna startwriting another book!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Be-because the last one was such a big seller?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Well, if you must know I have written 14 books. And as I am the only onewho has read them, I can tell you that they all have been very well received. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 What are you guys doing later?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Oh, Rachel and I have appointments to get our hair cut.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  We do?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 I want to see what he wants first.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Okay.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  I just found out that Elizabeths dad wants to meet me.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Wait a minute, hold the phone! Youre not Elizabeths dad?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Come on guys, I-I really want this guy to like me. It-it would really helpme out if you guys were here to make me look good.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	All	 Of course well help! Yeah! Well be here!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Thanks!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 We know how tough those parent/teacher conferences can be.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	  So uh, heres your officeset!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Wow! Huh?  Mac Macaveli, Private Investigator!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	  Lets get you into wardrobe for afitting.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Okay. Hey uh, when do I get to meet the robot?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	 Im sorry, why dont we do that right now? Hesright here. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Okay.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	 Joey Tribbiani, this is
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Oh wow! Hes so lifelike! Unbelievable! (He starts tugging on the guys ears.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	 This is Wayne, the man who created and operates C.H.E.E.S.E.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	  How do you do there, Wayne? 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	The Producer	 Ill let you two guys get acquainted, huh? 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Okay. Sorry about that Uh, sowheres C.H.E.E.S.E.?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 C.H.E.E.S.E. is right here. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	C.H.E.E.S.E.	  Nice to meet you Mac!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	  This is like the temporary robot, right?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 No. Why?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Well, I-I just, I just it was going to be like a really cool robot,yknow? Like the terminator or uh, when I first saw you.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 I spent two years developing this machine, its absolutely state ofthe art.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Im sorry, it justI dont know it doesnt really looklike it can do anything.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 It can do this. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 This is my father, Paul Stevens. Dad, this is Ross Geller.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 It-its great to meet you Paul.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 I usually prefer Elizabeths boyfriends to address me as Mr. Stevens.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Of course, of course, Mr. Stevens.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 So Ross, what your problem?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Eh-whExcuse me?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Why cant you get a girlfriend your own age?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Thats funny. Umm.  Its not funny.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 I dont like you going out with my daughter Ross.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Okay. I can, I can see that. Umm, but I think if you give me umm, onechance I can, I can change your mind.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Okay.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 What?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Okay. Ill give you one chance to change my mind.  You got one minute. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 Daddy!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Fine! Two minutes. Go.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 This isyou
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	  1 minute 50 seconds.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Okay, umm I want you to know that I have never done anything like thisbefore. I mean, I mean Ive been in um, relationships in general, uh but I have neverdone it with a studentI mean I notnot it! I mean, I mean IdontWe havent done it. Uh, I mean, I mean,weve-weve-weve done stuff.  Okay, okay, a joke, ajokelighten the mood. Umm, two guys go into a bar. One of them is Irish.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Im Irish.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 And the Irish guy wins the joke!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Ross!!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Ross!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 How crazy that wed run into you!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Oh God, thank you!  Umm, uh, Mr.Stevens Id like you to meet my friends uh, this is Phoebe, Monica, and Chandler.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Youre Elizabeths father, huh? I can see now where she getsher rugged handsomeness.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	  Is-is-is there a-a Mrs. Stevens?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Theres a Mr. Bing!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 No, unfortunately Lizzies mom passed away shortly after she wasborn. I raised her by myself.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe, Monica	  Ohh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 I get that a lot.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Okay umm, why dont we all take a seat, yknow? And uh, andIll get us all some uh some coffeesYeah, why dont you.  Uh andyou guys can talk about whatever, whatever you want. Yknow? Whatever pops into yourhead. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Yknow, it is so strange seeing Ross here this time of day,cause usually hes got the childrens hospital.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah. Not looking for dates. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 So uh, Monica is Rosss sister.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 And hes a great brother!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 I had a sister.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Ohh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 She passed away.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica, Phoebe	  Ohh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Oh, you dont have to do that every time.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 But uh Ross, Ross is a great guy! I was roommates with him in college.Uh, funny story Youre roommate in college died didnt he?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 A part of him did yes.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  Okay here we are Paul, Elizabeth.  So I hope you guys were finding something to talk about.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Yes, we were just
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Hi, Im sorry Im late but I am ready, ready to talk you up!When does Lizs father get here?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Im already here.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh! Ross is sooo great!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hey honey, you got the kind with the little girl, you said we weregonna to get the kind with the baby.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 No, you said the baby creeps you out.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 No, the little girl creeps me out.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 You said the baby.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Why would the baby creep me out?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Why would the little girl creep you out?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  You guys, Im sorry, could you please talk alittle slower? 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 This is going in your book?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah, its about relationships. Yknow? The traps, thepitfalls, what not to do, keep going. This stuff is great!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 What?! Excuse me!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 And how none of it matters when the people really love each other. And how people will believe anything you tell them as long asits a compliment.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  Oh hi!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Hi! Hi.  I think I left my keys here somewhere.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh! Well lets look for them.  Oh-oh-hey! Are these them?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 No.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 All right! 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Oh, here they are right here. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh good.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Thanks for your help. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  Oh, wait! Sorry, Mr. Paul? Mr. Paul?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Just call me Paul.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Paul. Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Well maybe you can date him then that would save me the trouble of killinghim.  Are you okay?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 You just dont look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Well, we were very young when we had her.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh. We?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Well yeah, it usually, it takes two people to 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh no! Yes! Of course, I know that! I justI meant yknow areyou still a We or are you just You?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Im just me, my wife died shortly after Lizzie was born.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  Ohh. So you raised her all on your own?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Yes I did.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Ohh.  Ooh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 How was your first day?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Pretty great! Except I did get a little attitude from the robot.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Damn those robots, theyre supposed to be our faithfulservants!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Anyway, it wasnt the robot, it was the guy who controls him. Yeah,he doesnt like me. He had C.H.E.E.S.E. knock over the sandwich right when I wasreaching for one! Ohh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Well, why dont you just get him fired?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 I may have to, I hate to do it, but Im the star! Yknow?Theres a limit to how many sandwiches I can eat off the floor.  Excuse me.  Joey Tribbiani. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Estelle	  Joe! Im glad I found ya, I got an audition forya!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Wow!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Estelle	 The thing is its kinda on the Q.T. The actor who has the partdoesnt know he might be fired. Its the lead in a series, Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Im the lead in Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E.!!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Estelle	 Uh-oh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Joey?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Hi Ross.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 I was just getting him to like you.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Joey?! Joey!! 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Ross, Joey is not here.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Okay, Ill just wait for him in here!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Ross, its okay. You can come out.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Yeah Ross its okay, its me, Mr. Stevens.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  Oh! Oh my God! I didnt even see you!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Sure you did! You came in, you got all awkward, and you ran into thebedroom. You were shouting, "Joey! Joey!" Bye Rach. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Bye!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Ill call you later. Bye Ross. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 What-what-what thehow da-how did-what the-how did-what?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Well, yknow he lost his keys so he was looking for them
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  In your mouth?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 No! Downstairs! And we got to talking yknow, for like two hours,and I really liked him so I invited him up here for a cup of coffee.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 You were at the coffeehouse!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Ross, whats the big deal? So I kissed the guy!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 He is my girlfriends father, okay? Its-its, itsweird!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 WhYou dated my sister!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 That was different!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 What? Why?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 This is weird for me!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Ross look, look this is good for you. Okay? Lets face it, so farthe guys not lovin ya! But I can turn that around! I got the inside track! Wecan all go out to dinner, yknow? And I can talk you up! Ross, the guy is a very, verysuccessful lawyer!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 How is that important?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh its important!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Apparently, theres like a million guys out there that can play Mac,and theres only this one robot and this one guy who controls it! I didnt knowhe could get me fired! What am I going to do?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Well yknow Joey, youre a pretty charming guy.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Thanks, but I kinda have a problem to deal with here.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 No sweetie, youve got to win over the guy that controlsC.H.E.E.S.E.! Youve got to kiss some serious robot ass!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Thats not a bad idea. Yeah. Okay, but if I got to turn on the charmtomorrow Im not wasting anymore of it over here with you guys.  Well, actually I got a little bit saved for you Pheebs.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 So do you think uh, Joeys more charming than me?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Yeah! Thats why Im sleeping with him on the side.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, you wish. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  "You wish."
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Phoebe, stop writing about us!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Im not writing about you! Im writing about other people.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Who?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Marcia and Chester.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Okay fine! Fine! Then you know what, Ill just write about Phyllis!Hmm!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hmm.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	  Phyllis is sitting in a chair.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Oh.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 I see what youre doing!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	  Phyllis sees what Im doing.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Oh-oh.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Ooh, I have tasted my own medicine and it is bitter!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Morning! Hey, hows my favorite genius and my little robot buddy?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 Dont touch him!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Okay!  All right. Umm, all right Wayne, levelwith me. Okay? I-I keep hearing all these rumors that I might get fired. Okay, they evenhave actors coming in to read for my part! Come on man, you-you got to give me a secondchance! I mean, I love-I love this little guy!  Ah-ah!!  Okay, thats why you didntwant me to touch him right? Here you go! Okay?  Stupid! I cant believe it! God!   Hey, how you doin? 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 So it seemed that my prom date had stood me up, so Ross selflessly,offered to take me.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 What a nice story!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 So Ross was in college and decided to jump at the chance to take a younggirl to her high school prom.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Wow! I definitely did not see that one backfiring! Im gonnago to the bathroom.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Yeah, take your time. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	  Just-just so you know I was a freshman and she was a senior. Soit wasnt as bad as-as
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Ross, look, I know Ive been giving you a lot of jabs and itspartly because Im very protective of Lizzie, and partly because well, they just keepcoming to me. But I have to admit that after all the wonderful things that Lizzie has toldme and the many, many,  many stories that Rachel has told me that, well youre not  all bad.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Not all bad.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 And anyhow, Im sorry I was so harsh before, but you have tounderstand that I  still look at Lizzie like shes a twelve-year-old girl.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Yeah. You know what? I know what you mean; I do that too.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 I beg your pardon?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 No! No! NotI dont mean I-I see her as a twelve-year-old girl!I mean I-I have a son, whos umm six and I still think of him as a baby.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 You have a son?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Yeah, well my-my ex-wife and I share custody of Ben and umm, uh, and justso you know, Carol and I are on excellent terms as Im sure you are with yourwife!  Oh, Im sorry!  Its unbelievable!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Dont worry about it, I just didnt realize you were married. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh we were, but that was just a , I meanthat was just a big drunken mistake.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Youre back.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 You two were married?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh! Whoops! Im sorry, you were talking about Emily!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Chandler, we said we would meet at the coffeehouse at six.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 We said seven!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 We said six!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 The only way that I said six would be if the sevens, let meet atseven, not at six.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Yeah and if I had seven, maybe I wouldve said something like this,"Wow! My boyfriends such a wise assseven!"
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  Hi!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Oh my good God.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Ugh!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 I know what time you said.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 What?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Well actually, I know what time Chester and Marcia said.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 What time?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Quite an interesting turn of events, suddenly its my book to therescue, huh?  Ooh, very interesting. Yeah, well this certainly clearsthings up.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	  What does it say?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 I will tell you as soon as you thank me for writing my book.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Thank you for writing your book. Its-its uh, great book and you arethe queen of everything.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Thanks! So are you.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	  I told you I should not wear this color. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  Mon  Marcia andChester are planning on seeing a movie on Sunday night. Marcia thinks theyresupposed to meet at six, Chester thinks its at seven.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 So you knew we were gonna miss the movie!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	 Thats right.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Monica	 Inside of telling us you decided to write in your stupid book!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Phoebe	  Marcia and Chester are mad at Phyllis.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 I cant believe Im going to lose this job!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Oh Im so sorry man! Is there anything I can do?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Yeah! Help me get this mini-fridge past the security guard.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 Hey Joey, I want to talk to you.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Yeah? Well, I dont want to talk to you Wayne! I hate you! You ruinedmy life! Oh, Chandler, Wayne. Wayne, Chandler. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Hi, how are ya?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 Joey, Joey, I-I-Ill g-get you your job back if you help me out.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	  Why should I help you?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	  The reason he just said.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	  What do you need?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 I-I-I saw you on stage talking to that beautiful woman, yknowSarah? 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Yeah?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 I wish I could talk to her.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 What are you in love with her or something?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 Yeah. Her. All of them. Anyone.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, Ive been there my friend.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Wayne	 Listen, I-I guarantee you keep your job if you can teach me how to talkto women like you do.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Oh wow Wayne, its not really something you can teach yknow?Its pretty much something youre born with if youYou-you can teach it! Ill show you right how to do it.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from eachmarriage.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 How to make the next one even shorter?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Now wait a minute thats not fair. He was married to me a hell of alot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didnt tell me.  Maybe I have to pee again. 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Well, this is fun. So Ross, did you kill any of these wives?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Yknow what? I-I-I I-I have had enough of this! Yknow,I-I-I care a great deal about your daughter and I have treated her with nothing butrespect! So if-if youve got a problem with me, frankly
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Are you yelling at me?!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 God no!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 Yknow what daddy? If you dont like Ross, thatsfine. It doesnt matter to me, Im gonna go out with him anyway.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Really?! 
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Well if it doesnt matter to her, it doesnt matter to me!  Still not yelling!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Wow. What can I say?  This doesnt make melike you any better!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Thats okay, Im not so crazy about myself right now either.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Then we agree?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Uh yeah, I guessYeah! I guess so.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Paul	 Neither of us like Ross!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Elizabeth	 I like Ross.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Ohhh! Kids!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	  Wait-wait-wait, I just thought of another story about hownice Ross is!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Ross	 Thats okay Rach, were not liking Ross right now.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Rachel	 Oh! Ive got a lot of those too!
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 Well, it turns out you were right C.H.E.E.S.E.
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	C.H.E.E.S.E.	 The shipment never made it through Omaha?
06	21	0621	The One Where Ross Meets Elizabeth's Dad	Joey	 You got it! And the rabbis beard, 100% horsehair. Nice catchC.H.E.E.S.E.!  Its your lineC.H.E.E.S.E.!  Wayne! Wayne!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	  Hi, you guys.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Hey!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Hi!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Whats the matter?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Well its justits one of those situations that I justhate. Yknow? A massage client gave me three tickets to the Helmet-Pelts exhibit atthe Morgan Chase museum.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	  Now youre thinking you gotta sleep with him.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 No! No! Its just that he gave me three tickets and there are sixof us!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Ill give up my ticket.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Me too.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Okay thats so generous!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 And I think Ross is generous too.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Great! Okay then its just us girls!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica, Rachel	  Great.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Yeah.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 So what-what is the exhibit.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Its mostly just photographs of lesbian love scenes interspersedwith video games and free sandwiches.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh man! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	  Hey!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Hi!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Hey!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Hey Ross listen Chandler got you out of going to the lesbian sandwichmuseum this weekend!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Thanks? But I have plans; Elizabeth and I are going out of town.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Oh thats great!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Yeah.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 I mean think about all the money that youre gonna make!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Why? What?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Well, her father pays you for baby-sitting right?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 No, no, thats funny. But maybe its time to move on, let it go,yknow? Stop it! Besides, Rachel is going out with Elizabeths father, so ah,hes much older than she is. Looks like Im not the only one interested infossils, huh?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 I mean Ross all that does is remind us that you are interested infossils.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Okay, okay. Uh, well uh, Rachel is going to need to yell sweet nothings in his ear. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Ross.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Oh, come on you guys; thats funny! Yknow? Because hesneedhes got like a hearing aide yknow, cause-causeyknow, cause hes all old, and 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Okay look, Ross, just so you know that since Lizzie likes you so much,Ive decided to accept the fact that youre going out with her.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Really? That okay, thats great.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Yeah. But then I changed my mind. Im funny like that. So I toldLizzie, now Im telling you, I dont want you seeing my daughter anymore.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 All right look, I-I realize it upsets you.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Yes it does.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 But, Elizabeth and I are-are both adults and so I dont thinktheres really anything you can do about it.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Ill call the university and tell them about your relationship andhave you fired.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Ohh! A man with a plan!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Oh, this is so exciting! You get your picture back up on the wall offame! Eek!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 I know. It was so cool when I was up there before. Me and Jim Belushiwould just be crackin up about something Then I get fired off of Days OfOur Lives and he takes me down. Now hes just laughing at me. Look at him, thatsmug Belushi bastard, Ill
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	  Ohh, okay maybe they put your picture back up they can put younext to Matt Lauer. Look at him, smiling at me.  Yeah I know; wed be greattogether!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Hey! So Im back.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Who are you?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Joey Tribbiani! From the wall! Okay, maybe this will jog your memory, huh? Huh? Okay eh-ah-anyway, Im ready to go back up on the wall Im the star of anew TV show.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	  Show me in the table.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh well, its not on TV yet.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Well, then its not on the wall yet.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Okay, fine, I will bring you a tape, huh? 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 So umm, now do you have any of Matt Lauers clothes here? Maybe?Just ones that havent been cleaned yet? 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Oh, I love museums!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Umm.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Soakin up all the culture.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Where do you want to start?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Ooh, the gift shop!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Yeah!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Hey, and then lunch.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Oh, wait yes, but I cant eat too much. Paul is taking me out todinner tonight, he said he has a big surprise planned.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Oh wow. What, do you think maybe hes gonna tell you that hesgay?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 What?! No! Why?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 No reason! That would just be a really big surprise, right?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	  You can put the aisle over here ,and put the wedding ceremony right over here. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 I didnt know you could get married here.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 This would be a beautiful place to get married, yeah, but Iwouldnt put the aisle there and I would never have the ceremony there! I mean youd have the ceremony under this big beautifularch.  
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	  May I help you?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Oh sorry didnt mean to interrupt. Its just such a beautifulspace; do you do a lot of weddings here?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	 Yes. Were very popular. Theres a two-yearwaiting list. Sorry! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Monica, you should totally put your name down on the list
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 What?! Are you crazy?! Im not getting married! Im not evenengaged.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Yeah, but theres a two-year wait. And then what if you get engagedin two years and then you got to wait another two years for this place. Thatsfour years. Chandlers not gonna wait that long. Hes gonna find somebody else,yknow? Someone, someone who did put their name on the list. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Yeah hon, it cant hurt to put your name down! I mean in if twoyears if youre not engaged you just dont use it.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Well, I mean I guess there is no harm in putting my name down.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Im gonna do it too!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Me too!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Really? Who would, who would you marry?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 I dont know, I dont have anyone right now. Yknow?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Oh Pheebs.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Dont feel too sorry for me. At least my boyfriend isnt gay.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Phoebe, that stuff is
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Dont even get me started on yours!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	  Hey! So, did you watch the tape of my show?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 I did.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 All right, lets get me back up there! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 No! It dont go up on the wall!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 WhatBut you saw the show!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Yes, it was very offensive to my people!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Dry cleaners?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Russians! It showed them as terrorists and villains!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Okay! Okay, look! You-you-you got Harrison Ford up there!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Thats right. Mr. Ford is a very good customer, he bringsus a lot of clothes; you bring us nothing!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Okay well that may be true. But, in-in okay, Air Force One theRussians were terrorists! And evil! And plus he kills a bunch of them!That-that-thats offensive to Russians.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Ive never seen it!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh you should, its great.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 This place is really beautiful!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Yeah, Ive been coming here since I was a kid. This used to bemy Grandmas.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Wow! The only thing I got from my Grandmother was her eyes. I mean not-nother actual eyeballs, but, but people say that my eyesDo-do you want to make out?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Sure!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Are you okay? Whats wrong?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Ehh, I was just, I was just thinking about your father.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Well, whatever works for ya
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 No. No-no uh, he just, he just really freaked me out before.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Oh. Well, so we have to hide our relationship from one more person.Big deal. Besides, its kinda fun hiding.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Yeah.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	  Hey umm, you brought protection right?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	  Why?! Are there like bears or something?!  Ohh. Oh,protection. Yeah-no, yeah-no, that-that-that I forgot.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Ill just run to the store and get some.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Oh no! Hey-hey, Im the guy! Ill get it.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Do you know where the store is?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 No.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Do you want to ride around town on my little pink bicycle? 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 A little bit.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	  Ill be back in ten minutes.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Okay.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Why dont you get in the hot tub and Ill meet you there.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Ohh, okay.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	  Oh my God, what a great surprise! This is such abeautiful house.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Thank you, its my moms. So this is the kitchen.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	  Youve reached Monica and Chandlers, ifyoure listening to this message, were probably screening.  Yeah weare.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	  Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chase museum.Im calling for Monica Geller. I want to let her know that there was a cancellationand if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at our facility, itis available 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	  This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! Yes, the groomNo! Not the groom!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Its so secluded up here.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 I know. I like it up here.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 I feel like were the only two people in the world.  Oops. Sorry. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Whats the matter honey? Did you see a little mouse?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 No-no! Big bear! Big bear outside! I think I-Iwouldyouactually, would you go check on that?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Honey, we dont have any bears here.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Well, okay. Would-would you get me a Diet Coke?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Okay. Ill be right back. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Okay. What?! What are you doing here?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 What are you doing here?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 I came with Paul!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Yeah, I recognize the ankles!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Get up!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Here you go honey! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Ahh. Thank you!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Diet Coke. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Op, ice. I need ice.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Okay.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Thank you.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Ill be right back. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	  You and your ice.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Ugh! Get out! Get out! Go! Come on!  No! Not in there! Hes in there! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	  Did you really hear a bear?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Go-go!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Here you go honey. One Diet Coke with ice.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Ohh, thank you.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Im so happy that youre here.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	  Here I am!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Elizabeth! Oh look, Elizabeths here! Who are youtalking to?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Uh, you guys?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 How did you know we were here?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Umm
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Well, she-she ob-obviously saw the tire tracks that were leading up tothe closed garage.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Obviously.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Elizabeth, what are you doing here?! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Did-did you come up here to work on that term paper or something?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Yeah! Yep.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Well, why do yknow go in that room and do your homework?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Ohh, I wouldnt do it in there. Thats my dadsbedroom.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Thats your, thats your dads bedroom. Thats your dads bedroom!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Why are you yelling?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Whoa, that Diet Coke just went straight to my head! Woo!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Hi, honey.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	  See you later. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 What? I-I bought groceries, I was gonna make you dinner!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	  Well next time ask! Or at least wait for me to ask! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	  Hi, this is Heldi from the Morgan Chasemuseum. Im calling for Monica Geller. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Oh no!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Museum Official	  I want to let her know that there was acancellation and if shes still interested in having the Bing-Geller wedding at ourfacility, it is available
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Oh please, he didnt hear it! He didnt hear it!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	  This is Chandler Bing! This is Chandler Bing! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 NOOOO!!!!!!!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Female Clerk	 Can I help you?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Uh yeah, where-wheres the guy who decides whos pictures go upon the wall?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Female Clerk	 Hes not here right now.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh, youre kidding me! All-all right, well make sure you tell himthat Joey Tribbiani stopped by to drop off all of these clothes. Okay? Im an actor;Im kinda getting my picture up there on the wall.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Female Clerk	 Yknow, there are two people who could put your picture upthere. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh really? Well, maybe you and I go out for drinks?  Yourethe other one right? 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 So Lizzie, are-are-are you planning on staying the night?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Oh no-no believe me, Im leaving as soon as possible!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Good. Good. Not that we dont want you to stay, obviously yourewelcomeHow much more homework do you have?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Ahh, I just have one problem left that I do not know how tosolve. Uhh, Rachel maybe you want to come upstairs and help me figure it out?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Really? Okay. Okay, I-Ill go upstairs.  If-if you get mesomething from the car.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 What do you need from the car?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Surprise me.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Okay. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	  So youre gonna be in the car, I will be upstairs, andthats where everybodys gonna be!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  Just relax. Just relaxPaul, youre doing great. She likes you. She Maybe, she likes you. She likes you. Yknow why? Becauseyoure a  neat guy.  You arethe man. You are  the man!  I still gotit. Nice and sexy. Youre just a love machine.  Im just alove machine and I wont work for nobody but you! Hey bab-y!  Showtime.  Im just a love machine,yeah ba-by! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Phoebe!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Yeah?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Have you seen Chandler?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 No! Why?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 The woman from the museum called and said that there was a cancellationand that we could move up our wedding and Chandler heard!  I know! How badis this?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Well for the regular guy, its bad, but Chandler, Oh dear God!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 I know! I know! And he totally freaked out and I cant find himanywhere!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 What are you gonna do?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Well, Im never gonna listen to you again, thats for sure! "Yknow, harm can it do if you go and put your name down?"
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Rachel said that!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Well Rachels not here! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Oh! Here it is!  Ooh, Joey! Why did yousign it, "Son of a bitch?" 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 I didnt do that! Who wouldve done that?!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	  Son of a bitch!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Okay, maybe ask this guy.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 You, get out of my shop!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Well, what did he do?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 He went out with my wife!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Joey!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa, I-IHey! I did not go out with your wife! Okay? I went out with her! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	The Dry Cleaner	 Thats my wife!!! Get out! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 Well, we should go.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Yeah.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Ross? Ross?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Elizabeth!  Okay. Okay.  Im gonna go out this window.  Ill meet you at the front door. Just tell them youregoing home, okay?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Okay!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	  Oh wait-wait-wait!! No! Dont go inthere! Dont go in there! I need another soda!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Ross!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Rachel	 Oh my God Ross! What in heavens name are you doing here?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	  And that is why we cannot see each other anymore.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Ross. You and I are going to have to have a little talk.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Daddy!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Youre next!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Elizabeth	 Okay. I didnt know he was here. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Let me just see if I got this straight. I tell you to stay away from mydaughter or Ill have you fired. What you heard was, "Take my daughter, come upto my country house, and ruin my weekend with Rachel!"
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 Okay, please-please Paul, just let me explain
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 No, let me explain! Fired!!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 All right, fine! Fine! Have me fired! But uh, I want you to know that youand I are not all that different. I mean, I too am a neat guy. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	  What? 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Ross	 And I too am just a love machine. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Paul	 Ross, let me show you where the guest room is.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	  Im so sorry. Please, stop freaking out.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Im not freaking out. Why would I be freaking out? A woman namedHeldi called and said we were getting married, but that happens everyday. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Honey, we were at this beautiful place, and I-I-I just put our namesdown for fun! I mean, whats the harm in that?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Right here! 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Chandler, please dont think I was trying to pressure you. Phoebeand Rachel
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Phoebe and Rachel! So the people that knew about our wedding before mewere you, Phoebe and Rachel, Heldi, and apparently some band called Starlight Magic 7 whoare available by the way!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 It was a mistake. Please dont take this to mean anything, becauseit doesnt.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Okay.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Really?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Yes, if it really doesnt mean anything, because you know thatIm just not ready
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 I know! I know.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Okay. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Monica	 Im gonna go tell Joey that  that youre back. I wasreally worried about you. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	  Hey, did she buy it?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Totally.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 So did Heldi show you the place?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 Yeah, its beautiful.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Phoebe	 I cant believe youre gonna ask Monica to marry you!
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Chandler	 I know.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Hey Gunther.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Gunther	 Hey! Take these cappuccinos to table 11 and that guy over there wants the biscotti. 
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Oh uh, well I just came in for a cup of coffee to go.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Gunther	 Do you still work here?
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 No! No, I quit a long time ago.  Did I forget to you that one?Im sorry.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Gunther	 Oh thats cool, I was gonna fire you anyway.
06	22	0622	The One Where Paul's The Man	Joey	 Great! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Pheebs, can you help me pick out an engagement ring for Monica? Icant figure this out! Its so hard! Should I get her a Tiffany cut or a Princess cut or aah-ah! Paper cut!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Now, have you told anyone else?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 No, I dont want to tell anybody else because I dont wantMonica to find out.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 You told me.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Well, its because I trust you, youre one of my bestfriends, and you walked in on me when I was looking at ring brochures.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Yeah well, once again not knocking pays off. I only wish you hadntbeen on the toilet.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Me too.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Hey. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Hey.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Hey! So Chandler, wanna go to the coffeehouse? 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Oh all right.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Yeah, coffeehouse.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Oh perfect, we were just gonna see if you wanted to go.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Oh well, we dont because we gottheother pl-place.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 How rude.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh, Im sorry. You wanna bite? 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 So how are things going with Paul?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Good. Although yknow, he-hes a private guy. Yknow, Iwish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Thats easy! You just have to think of him as a-as a jar of picklesthat wont open.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 So what are you saying; I should run him under hot water and bang hishead against a table?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 No thats what you do when you want to get the truth out ofsomeone.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  Hi honey.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Hi!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	  Watch this.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  How are you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	  Okay.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Hi Paul!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Hi Phoebe.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 So how are things going with you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Cant complain.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  Come on.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Okay. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  Hey!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Hi!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Ross! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Great to see you!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Good to see you too!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 How you doing?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Good. Bye! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Okay! You take care! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, what-what was the deal with you and Chandler blowing us offbefore?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Yeah! That was so weird, huh?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Phoebe, whyd you do it?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 I didnt do it! It was Chandler! Hes Hes mad atyou!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 What?! Why?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Please, I think you know why.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 I cant think of anything.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Come on Ross, youre a paleontologist, dig a little deeper.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Wait a minute, is it because Joey and I didnt invite him to thatKnicks game a couple of weeks ago?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Do you think thats something that hed be mad at you for?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 I guess it could.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Well then I think thats it.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Well, if hes angry, he really shouldnt just cover it up. I-Iwish he would just tell me the truth.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Oh, if thats what you want you then you really should run his headunder hot water and bang his head against a table.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Honey I made a reservation at China Garden, is that okay?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Yeah thats great. But first, wait, talk to me, talk to me. Tell meabout your day.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 It was fine.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Okay. Hey, what are you thinking? What are you thinking right now?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Im thinking that you are looking really fine it that dress.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Yeah thats great Paul, but yknow I wanna knowwhatWow, those are really great! I just wannaknow what, what is behind this-this strong, silent exterior. Yknow they say thatstill waters run deep and I wanna swim in yours.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Are you talking about having sex?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 No Paul, I dont know anything about you! Yknow, like-likeyour childhood! Tell me about your childhood!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Normal.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Okay, well then how about puberty! Come on, thats always a painfultime! Yknow your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your handin warm water while youre sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Nope! That never happened to me!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Well, youre lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. Anyway,umm The rest of you life, yknow? Any regrets?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Nope.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 All right Paul, Im not asking for a lot here. Okay? Just give mesomething. Anything!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Okay.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Okay.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Okay.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 All right.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 When I was six years old.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Hm-mmm.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 I wanted a big wheel. And instead my parents got me this little plasticchicken that you hop around on. It was embarrassing; kids made fun of me. That was apretty tough year.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Thats-thats great! See? I already feel like I know you alittle better! Thank you. Okay, come on. Now we can go eat. Lets go. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 It was horrible. They called me chicken boy.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 And in fifth grade I got into a fight. Well, it wasnt really afight. Richard Darinvel bit me on the nose and, and I feel down. I still have a littlescare right here  you can see it.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Yeah. Yeah, I-I-I see the scare. Listen, Paul, I think this is reallygreat that-that yknow, you shared your feelings. Its really, itsbeautiful, but umm, what do you say we go share some food?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Oh, I couldnt eat now.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 What?! Wait! What are you talking about?! You love their Kung PaoChicken!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Chicken?  Chicken boy!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 My God, Im sorry! Im sorry! I didnt mean to do that! Iwouldnt do that!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Nothin! This is the nine millionth ring store weve been too andI cant find the perfect ring!  Ugly ring! Ugly ring! Ugly ring!  Its a beautiful selection. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Okay, so maybe you dont get her a ring. Maybe you-maybe you dosomething different. Yknow? Maybe you get her an engagement bracelet, yknow?Or an engagement tiara? Orooh! An engagement Revolutionary War musket! (Picks one upfrom the display in the corner.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yknow, Im so glad I picked you to help me with this.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Huh? Can you just imagine getting down on one knee and handing her thisgorgeous piece of weaponry?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah, Im gonna stick with the ring.  Oh, this ones nice!  I like this one! Sir? Uh,kind sir? Can I see this one?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	  Wait a minute, no, this is,this is the reason you brought me. Okay? I know how to haggle. So let me handle this fromhere on out.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 Can I help you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Uh-uh, yes. I would like to see that ring please.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Or not, whatever.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 This ring is from the 1920s, its a one and a half caratdiamond with sapphires on either side.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Sir, can I ask you to umm, could youhold out that ring and askme to marry you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 Okay.  Will you marry me?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	  Oh my God thats it, thats the ring! How muchis it?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Chandler, I-I will handle this!  How much is it?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 8,600.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 We will give you $10.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	  Are you interested in this ring?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yes! Yes, but I can only pay $8,000.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 Okay, I can let it go at eight.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 We stand firm at $10.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	  How would you like to pay?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Uh, credit card.  Oh no! No-no, but Ileft my credit card with Joey.  Okay, Ill go get it. You guard the ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Okay.  Listen, Im sorry about before. Do you haveanything her for $10.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 Uh yes, I have these two rather beautiful $5 bills.  
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Ill give you $1 for them.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Hey, remember how Chandler and Phoebe blew us off yesterday?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 No.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Remember? You-you were eating pizza.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Yeah.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Okay. Well, apparently Chandlers angry at us for not getting him aticket to that Knicks game a couple of weeks ago.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh, were supposed to just get him a ticket?! That guy is alwaysmooching off of us!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Yeah! Anyway, I-I still think we should try to patch things up,yknow? Like uh, maybe we could get him to get tickets to another Knicks game andinvite him.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh wow thats a great idea! And I still have his credit card.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Gunther	  Here you go.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Oh.  
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey-ho-ho, I got this one. Here you go.  Yknow I gotta tell ya, sometimes I justI dont getChandler. Yknow, me and him do stuff all the time without you and you dont getall upset.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 All the time?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 All the time!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh my God!!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Monica	 Still crying?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Like a little girl. I know. I know. I know. This is all my fault;I wanted him to open up. But God, I didnt know that I was gonna unleash this-thisweepy, clingy, moist monster!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Monica	 Yknow, I only know of two surefire ways to shut a man up. And oneof them is sex.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Whats the other one?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Monica	 I dont know, Ive never had to use the other one. Imjust saying yknow, if were having sex, hes not gonna be talking.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh thats right. Youre the talker.  Anyway uh, great idea! Umm, I gotta go to the store; I told him that I would buyhim some more tissues.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Monica	 Oh, we have some
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 No you dont!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Okay umm, Id also like to try on the tiara.  Oh yeah. Okay.   What do you think, toomuch?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	 A tad.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Okay. Then, take the tiara back and let me hold the musket again.  Somethingsmissing. Its not Okay oh, let me see the ring my friend picked out.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Male Jeweler	  Wheres the 1920s princess cut ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Female Jeweler	 I just sold it to that gentleman. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Oh my God!!  No!What?! Help me! Let me out! Now! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Rachel?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 No. How are ya Paul? 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  Okay. Chandler, did your dadever hug you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 No, did he hug you?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 No! No! Its just that, my dad never did. I miss my dad.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Well, you can see my dad in Vegas kissing other dads.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Hey Chandler?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Would you.Would you hug me?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Im a little busy here Paul.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Thats exactly what my dad used to say! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Okay, a quick one. Come on hug it out.  Oh hey! There you go.  Okay. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Five more seconds.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Okay! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	  Hey!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Joey! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-hey-hey!  Hi, Paul is it? 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Do you have my credit card?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Yes, its in my Inin my pocket.   My back pocket! My back pocket!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Thank God! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh hey listen I got us tickets to a Knicks game tonight.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Oh, I cant go.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Come on! Itll be fun! Me, you, and Ross, and Paulprobably
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Chandler, I found the perfect ring. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Oh, thats uh, thats pretty nice but Im gonna go withthe one I picked first.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Oh my God Chandler, the one you picked is gone. Its over!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 What?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Some guy bought it. Im sorry. I tired to stop it but they  put me in jail!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 They put you in jail?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 The little jail between the doors!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Phoebe, I asked you to guard the ring!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 I know, Im sorry! But yknow, this ring is better! Monicanever even saw the other ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah but when he proposed to me with the ring I got goose bumps.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Maybe it was the guy.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 It was the ring!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Hey! So uh, was he excited about the tickets?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 No! He blew us off!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 What?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 I know!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 I cant believe it.  Can I tell you something? Im alittle mad at him now.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Can I tell you something? Me too.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Yknow what? He didnt want to talk to us about being angry,well maybe we dont talk to him at all!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Ooooh! Freeze him out.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Thats right!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 I like it!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Eh? Well show him!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 From now on, its gonna be Joey and Ross, best friends.  Okay! Were gonna be the new Joey and Chandler.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Hi. Im back.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Hey! I have so much more to tell ya, Ive written it all down!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Ah thats great. No actually thats Thats great! Thats really great! Yknow, I gotta tell ya writing, I meanwriting, gets me uh, gets me kinda hot.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Wait! Wait! Listen! Listen to this!  Yknow what I wanted to be when I was that age?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 A lover?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 A surfer.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh yeah surfer?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 I wanted to be one with the waves, yknow?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Okay, hold on real quick, hold on a second let me just uh,  get a little more comfortable here.Wait, now wait a second, this isnt too revealing is it?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	  No. What ever happened to that little dude. So full of dreams
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 I dont care about the little dude! I cant! I cannot listento anymore of this! Yknow, the only person who would want to listen to this is amental health professional! And then its only because they get paid $100 an hour! Doyou know how much money I couldve made listening to you? $2,000! And do you knowwhen I figured that out? While you were talking!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 What?! I cant believe youre trying to stifle me! When just 14hours ago we figured out that that is exactly what my mother was trying to do to me!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh Im sorry. I I-I dont meanI didntmean to stifle you. I This is all just a little overwhelming.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 Oh Rachel, Im so sorry. I didnt mean to overwhelm you.Its just that, when those gates open, you  Hard to closeem. But they are closed now. Believe me.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Im so glad, Im so glad you shared. And Im glad that youre done. What do you say we umm 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 I would really like that. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Paul	 That wasso good. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	  Hey.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 I cant believe I let you talk me into buying this stupid gumballmachine looking ring!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Its not a stupid gumball machine looking ring! Its abeautiful ring!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 No, its not! When I looked at the other ring I could seeMonicas face when I gave it to her, yknow? And I could see her saying yes.When I look at this ring, all I see is a ring! Unless I look at it really closely and thenI can see my own eye.  Look, this is the most important thingIm gonna do in my life. I wanna make sure its perfect.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Okay. There may be a way that we can get the other ring back.Cause I heard the guy tell the jeweler where he was going to propose. So maybe wecan get him to trade rings or something.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 I cant do that.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Well you certainly cant give her that stupid gumball ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 There he is! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Okay and he hasnt proposed yet because she has no ring on herfinger.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Wow! Youre good! After this, we should solve crimes.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah! Okay, go, go, go get him.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Oh, okay.  Excuse me sir? Could you come with meplease? You have a phone call.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 Who is it?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 It is your office.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 Do you know who at my office?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 John?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 Oh John! Great!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	  Here he is.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	  Hi! Hi. Okay, there was a slight mix-up at the jewelry store,the ring youre about to propose with was supposed to be held for me. So, Imgonna need to have that back.  But, in exchange Im willingto trade you this beautiful, more expensive ring.  Ew.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Wow! I would trade.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 It is beautiful, but Im gonna use this one. Now, if youllexcuse me.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 No-no! This is my fiancee  and her heart was set on that ring.You dont want to break her heart now do you?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Yeah, do you want to break a dying womans heart?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 Youre dying?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah, shes dying Of a cough apparently.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Yes, and it is my dying wish to have that ring. See, if Im notburied with that ring then my spirit is going to wander the nether world for alleternity
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	  Okay, thats enough honey!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	 I dont know.  Let me see the ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Great! Okay, here. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Customer	  All right. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you!  And youare about to marry a wonderful man!  Hey! Immarrying a dead woman!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Guys?  Ive got something important to tell ya. Guys?  Guys?!  Im gonna ask Monica tomarry me.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	  I think we gotta end the freeze out.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Wait a minute, is this, is this for real?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yeah, check out the ring. 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh my God!!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 So you two are really serious?!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Yep, pretty much.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 You-youre gonna get married?! I mean Were gonna bebrothers-in-law! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 And-and-and-and-and-and, and were gonna be friends again! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	  HeyyyyWhat?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 Oh its water under the bridge, forget it!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Okay!  I was gonna wait til uh, it was officialyknow? But I got so excited I just had to tell you guys because youre my bestfriends.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	 I think Im gonna cry!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	  Ugh! No more crying! Please! I just dumped onecry baby, Ill dump you too!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Im gonna ask Monica to marry me.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh Chandler!!  You guys are gonna be sohappy!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 I know.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Joey	  Wheres all the tissues?! 
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Check out the ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Rachel	  Nice! One and a half carat easy.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	  Hi.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Hey-hey Pheebs!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 What?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 Chandlers gonna ask Monica to marry him!
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Phoebe	 Oh I know, I helped pick out the ring.
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Ross	 You told her before you told us?
06	23	0623	The One With The Ring	Chandler	 Well, she walked in when I was looking at the ring brochures. You canunderstand that, right?  Guys? Guys? 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 God that is the most beautiful engagement ring ever!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah? Well, you should know. Youve bought like a billion ofem.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, you didnt get one.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay, well tonights the big night.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay listen, how are you gonna ask her?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 It is going to be perfect. I am taking her to her favorite restaurant.Im going to get her a bottle of the champagne that she really loves; therefore knowshow expensive it is. Then when the glasses are full, instead of proposing a toast Imjust gonna propose.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 That sounds perfect!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Youre gonna mess it up let me do it.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Im not gonna mess it up.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 If she says no, can I have the ring?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Shes not gonna say no.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 If!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Hi Monica.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Give me it!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Its gone.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Phoebe!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Hi Monica.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Were practically kissing. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey Rach!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Are any of you guys free tonight? My boss is hosting this charity eventfor underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. So, Monica?Chandler?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Well, Monica and Chandler cant go. Weregoing to dinner remember?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God, Im so sorry.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Whats the big deal?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I just get mad when Rachel doesnt remember where weregoing.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Where are you going?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 How about you guys? 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Open bar?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 I think so.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I can do that for the kids.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, yknow what? Ill come too. Im making money now;its about time I give something back.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, you could also give back the money you owe me.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay. Have a benefit.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	  Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hey! Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh no, I have plans with Elizabeth.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, so youre already doing your part for the kids.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Im sorry, its just one of my last nights together before sheleaves for campto be a counselor!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Ross let me ask you a question. All jokes aside, where is thisrelationship going?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Wait a minute, all jokes aside? I didnt agree to that!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Do you really see this as a long-term thing?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 I dont know.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yknow, you are 12 years older than her.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Wait a minute, does-does everyone feel this way?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	All	 Yeah! Yeah, sort of. Im sorry.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh-uhWow! Uh, I thought you guys were just like making jokes, I hadno idea. What you know what? You guys are wrong. Uh yes, there is a chronological agedifference but I never notice it. You know why? Because she is very mature. Besides, itdoesnt really matter to me what you guys think. I mean, Im the one datingElizabeth, not you!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Thats not what she said last night. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 See? Now, he could date her.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Will you marry me? Will you marry me?  Hey, you marry me!  Whats going on little elves?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Its the big night! We wanted to wish you good luck!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, yeah you have the ring?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah, right here in my pocket.  Pheebs?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh! Oop! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay, now will you guys get out of here? I want this is to be asurprise and shes gonna know.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	  Yeah-yeah you guys. Get out of here!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Hi guys.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  You are beautiful.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, thank you!   Whats going on?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Were just reallyvery excited about thischarity event that we have to go to.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Here.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh! Thank you!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 So now whats going on here?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. They lay out all the stuff hereand then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No, I know what a silent is I meant, whats going on with yourhair?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Uh, wh-why?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No! Its nice!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Nice to see you Rachel.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, hi!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 So glad you brought someone.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Someone? I brought people. Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, this isMr. Thompson.  Hes the head of my department.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, hi. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 And I also brought my friend Joey
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Oh!! Shrimp toast! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well, yknow I-I dont know where he is.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Well, I hope youre gonna bid on some things Rachel.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well, yknow what? Actually, I was about to bid on this lovely tripto Paris.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Ohh, nice choice.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Good luck.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Thank you.  Okay, twenty dollars.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Zoe	 Shut the door! Shut the door!! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Whats-whats going on?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	 The guys across the hall are throwing water balloons at us.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh, you have to call the police! Thats what I did to the kids in mybuilding!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	 No, its a water balloon fight! We started it!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh!  Listen umm, I, I just stopped by to see if youwanted to see this play tonight. Umm, its supposed to be excellent. The director isthe same
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	  Who drank all the Kamikazes? 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Sarah	  Nobody! We put themin here! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	  You want some?! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 No! Okay! Okay!  Okay, look, can I, can I just-just talk toyou for a second?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	 Yeah, sure.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh, so this play umm, what do you think? Its-its gotten greatreviews! Yknow the uh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	First Dorm Guy	 Attack! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Second Dorm Guy	 Put your balloons down!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	The Girls	 You put your balloons down!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	First Dorm Guy	 You put your balloons down!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	  Everybody put their balloons down!!!  Now this is a nice suit!! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Our next item is the romantic trip to Paris.  It goes toEmil Alexander high a high bid of 2,300.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ugh! So close!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey you guys! Look! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I got me some drinks!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 What are you doing?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Open bar!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well now its an empty bar.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You just cant stand anyone else enjoying themselves cantyou?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 And finally, our biggest item of the night, the 22-footgentlemans day sailer sailboat. The winning bid was a whooping $20,000! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I won! That was my guess!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 What?! What?! What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I guessed 20,000!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Joey! It is an auction! You dont guess, you buy!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 What?! I dont have 20,000!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Congratulations on your new boat, Joey Tribbiani!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Joey! Sit down! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Forget her! You enjoy this!! (Pulls him back up and starts applaudingagain. Joey waves and does a salute.] 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What are you doing?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  One nation, underGod. Indivisible with liberty and justice for all.  I remembered it.  The champagne is here.  
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Are you okay?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yes! Yes! Im good! Are you good? Are you good? Iseverythingare youare you perrr-perfect?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah. Im okay. Im actuallyIm a little cold, canI have your jacket?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, yeah.  Uh, no youcant have my jacket! Because then I would be cold! If you thought that you weregoing to be cold, you shouldve brought your own jacket. But uh, other than that, areyou okay? Are you okay?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Are you sure youre okay?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yes! Im fine. In fact Ive been fine for a long time nowand I think, the reason is you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Ohh thats sweet!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay umm, before I meant you I had really little life and Icouldnt imagine growing old with
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Oh my God!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  I know, but just letme say it.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God, Richard. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?! Im Chandler!  Oh, thats Richard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh God, maybe he wont see us. Richard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	  Monica! Chandler!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey-hey, hey!  I dont know why I didthat!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey, its good to see you!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 You too, you let uh, your hair grow long.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 YeahOh thats right. You, you always wanted me too. Hey, Isee you got your mustache back.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well, my nose got lonely.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  And uh, you dont have a mustache whichis good.  Im Chandler; I make jokes when Im uncomfortable.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	RichardS Date	 Hi, Im Lisa.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hi.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh, Im sorry.  Lisa,  Monica,Chandler. We used to date.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Richard! No one supposed to know about us!  See I, did it again.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler, wh-why dont we sit down?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah, Ill sit down. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Its good to see you
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Matire'D	  Youre tables ready sir.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh. Good to see you guys.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yes. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Matire'D	  Orif you prefer, this table is available.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 That might be fun. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 What were you thinking?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I didnt know it was an auction!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wh?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I figured, take a guess, help a charity, free boat!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Why would a charity give away a free boat?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I dont know! Charity?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ugh!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well, just buy the damn boat! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Phoebe, dont you think youve had enough to drink?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Im just helping the kids!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 How is you drinking helping the kids?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Because the more I drink, the less there is for the kids to drink.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	  Mr. Tribbiani.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh hi!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Your generous contribution brings us a big step closer to buildingthe youth center.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Just out of curiosity, how-how much is that boat worth?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 I think it was valued at 19,000
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey, I was pretty close.  Uhh, so badnews. Umm, I cant buy the boat, I dont have any money.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Joey! Joey, good one! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Thompson	 Thats good. Very good! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 So uh listen, I think Im gonna take off now. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Hey! Youcantleave Joey! You agreed tobuy that boat, all right?! That is a contract! And plus if you leave, my boss is gonnakill me!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, what am I gonna do Rach?! I dont have that kind of money!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 I know. Okay.  Okay. Okay. All right. Allright, this is what were gonna do, we are gonna go to the next highest bidder, andwe are just gonna let them buy it, and then youre just gonna pay the difference.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Look, I dont know why the kids need a youth center anyway!Yknow? They should just watch TV after school like I did and I turned out fine!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Not great.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 And so, were hiding in the bathroom.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 And-and then I sneak out and before Monica can her parents come in.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 So I hide in the shower and the next thing you know theyre goingat it right on the bathroom floor.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Lisa	  Oh my God!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I got a good one, I got a good one! I once walked in on both myparents making love to the same guy.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Its so great seeing you guys again. Id like to make atoast.  Uh, as a poet once said, "In the sweetness offriendship, let there be laughter and sharing of pleasures for in the due of little thingsthe heart finds its morning and is refreshed."
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Ohh.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God, you guys!! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Before you say anything, have wegot a story for you! Guess who we bumped into at dinner!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Who?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Richard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 What?  A-ohh!  Ohh. Oh thats right thatsright. Thats Richards favorite place too.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh you knew that. Good!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I thought you were going out with Elizabeth.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, I was but uh, she was a little busy with a water balloon fight.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh Ross, sometimes grown-ups have commitments they just cant getout of!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Yknow, maybe she is too young for me. Yknow, when I was overthere and she was running around with her friends, I felt like I was a baby-sitter. Ifinally started to see what you guys were talking about. I dont know what to do.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Why dont you just weigh out the good stuff about the relationshipagainst the bad stuff. I mean thats what I did when I first  weighing stuff.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay umm, bad stuff. Well, Im-Im 12 years older than she is.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 If the school finds out youre fired.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Hmm.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Shes leaving for three months.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 For camp!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, good stuff. Umm, well shes-shes sweet and prettyand
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Look Ross, the only question you need to ask is, "Do you see afuture?" I mean like do you see yourself marrying her?  Oh my God! You did it already! You married her, didnt you?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 No! No! Ididnt do that. Its just Okay, honestlyno. I dont, I dont see a big future with her.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay well I thinkthats your answer.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Ive got to talk to her. Ugh, I hate this part.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey, you have to forget about Elizabeth. I mean if youre notcareful you may not get married at all this year!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Rach! Rachel! Okay, the next highest bidder is at table one.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh great!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Oh and uh the guy who got the Paris trip is at table four.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, okay.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Its a trip for two!  Excuse me. Excuse me, is the person who won the Paris trip at this table?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Emil Alexander	 That was me.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, en chante.  
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Uhh, excuse me is there a Mr. Bowmont at this table?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 Thats me.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Ahh, yes. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh well, hello. This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman daysailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of $18,000.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 You-you have to pay that! Its not just a guess.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Okay. Okay. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 I was actually relieved uh I didnt win the boat. My wifewouldve killed me.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Are you kidding me?! Shes gonna this boat!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Y-Yeah! What-what is your wifes name?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 Its Pam.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Pam! Oh God okay, just imagine this, "The Pam."
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Aw-awww!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 I dont think shed like that.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay, uh-uh imagine this, "The Mr. Bowmont."
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Oooooh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 I dont think so dear.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay look, let me paint you a little picture.  All right, you are settin sail up the Hudson! Youve got the wind in yourharms! You-you get all that peace and quiet thatyouve always wanted! You get back to nature! You can go fishin! Youcanooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, andthen when youre old, Cappy.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Mr. Bowmont	 What the hell, its for a good cause! All right!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 No way! Its mine!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  What?! What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 All that stuff you just said? I want that!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 But Joey you dont have $20,000!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Who cares?! I-Ill make payments, whatever it takes, I want the Mr.Bowmont!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God, youre back!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ohh, let me see it! Let me see your hand! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Why do you want to see my hand?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I wanna see whats in your hand. I wanna see the trash. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Eww! Oh, its all dirty. You should throw this out.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Okay. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  What did you guys just do?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What happened?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Richard was there so I couldnt do it!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 What?! Noooo 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Im gonna do it tomorrow yknow, and-and surprise her, butnow youve ruined it!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 We didnt ruin it!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Who walks into a room and asks to see a persons hands?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well, a palm reader, a manicurist, a hand doctor
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Glove salesman!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Good one! Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 This is terrible. What am I going to do?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Look, she only suspects something okay? She doesnt know for sure,so just throw her off the track.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Thats right, I can throw her off. I can make her think marriageis the last thing on my mind.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah! Yeah! Convince her that-that youre scared of commitment!Convince her that youre a little coward!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I can do that, Ive had 30 years of practice.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, being you is finally gonna pay off! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  I had to go all the way to the basement because some idiotkeeps stuffing the trash chute with pizza boxes!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 That guys still doing that?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Hey!  Oh my Godyoure here, let me see your hand!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No, youre too late!!! She already took out the trash!!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	  Wow! I have never had such a healthy break-up! She wassuch a grown-up about it! She didnt seem too immature for me! Did I just make a hugemistake?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	  Ross! Wait!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Elizabeth, thank God! I was just thinking about
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Elizabeth	 You suck!! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, break-ups still on!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay, okay, here she comes!  How do Ilook? Do I look like a guy who doesnt want to get married?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah! And also, a little like a French guy.  I never noticed that before.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Hi guys!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What are you up too?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, just hanging out, talkin about uh, websites. Yeah, we saw this really interesting website about marriage and how totally unnecessary itis and how its just a way for the government to keep tabs on you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Yeah, Big Brother.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Well thats a little crazy. Although I am yknow glad to hearthat youre branching out on what you look at on the Internet.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah, well Yknow, it just got me thinking though, whywould anybody ever want to get married huh?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Why?! To celebrate your relationship! To solidify your commitment! Todeclare your love for one another to the world!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Eh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay well thats good to know.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  The Mr. Bowmonts here!!! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Waitress	 Hey Monica, theres a customer who wants to complement the chef,should I let him in?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Sure, I love this part! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Waitress	  Come on in.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Hi!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Richard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Actually, Im not here to complement the chef.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Ohh Oh, thats okay I hate when people come back tocomplement the chef. Like I have nothing better to do! So whats up?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well, it was great seeing you the other night.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, good to see you too. Did you come down here to tell me that?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 No! I came here to tell you something else.  I came here to tell you I still love you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What uhWhat did youWhat?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I still love you. And I know I probably shouldnt even be heretelling you this, I mean youre with Chandler a guy I really like, and if you sayhes straight Ill believe you! After seeing ya the other night I knew if Ididnt tell ya Id regret it for the rest of my life. Letting you go was thestupidest thing I ever did.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow youre really not supposed to be back here!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well yeah, Im sorry. I know this is the wrong time and the wrongplace but I had to tell ya! I wanna spend my life with you. I wanna marry you. I wannahave kids with you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh God  Why dont they put chairsback here?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I know this is crazy but am I too late?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What the Yes youre too late! Where was all this three yearsago?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well I know I was an idiot! And I tried to forget you, I really did!Yknow after we had lunch last year I spent six months in Africa trying to getyou out of my head!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What were you doing in Africa?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Working with blind kids.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Ohhh! What are you doing to me?! Oh look, I-I Im sorry butumm, this-this-this-this is not going to happen.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Okay thats fine, Ill walk away. And Ill never botheryou again, but only if you tell me Chandlers willing to give you everything Iam.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Well he is! Yeah, I mean marriage is all he talks about! My goodness, infact, Im the one thats making him wait!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 You are?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Why?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Why? Because of the government.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Isnt it incredible?! Monica and Chandler, gettin married.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I know, theyre gonna be so happy together.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohh I mean two best friends falling in love, how often does thathappen?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Not that often!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 No! Im so happy for them!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Me too! So happy for them!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Im so happy and not at all jealous.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh no! No God, definitely not jealous!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 I mean Im probably 98% happy, maybe 2% jealous. And I meanwhats 2%? Thats nothing.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Totally. Im like 90/10.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah me too.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey uh, have you guys scene Chandler?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Whno, but yknow who did stop in herelooking for ya, Tennille.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 So that marriage stuff that you were saying yesterday, you dontreally believe that do you?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Sure I do. In fact, I think the whole concept of marriage isunnatural. I mean look at pigs. Lets take a second here and look at pigs. Okay pigsdont mate for life. I mean a pig can have like a hundred sexual partners in alifetime, and thats just an ordinary pig not even a pig thats good at sports!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, but thats pigs not people!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 If marriage worked, Id be all for it. But do you know what thedivorce rate in this country is? 97%.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Wait a minute. Are you honestly telling me that-that you may neverwant to get married?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, never say never but yknow probably uh yeah, never.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God! Then-then-then what are we even doing?! What is this?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What is all this pressure?! Is this some new kind ofstrategy? Why dont you put down your copy of The Rules huh mantrap?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow what?! I gotta go! Ugh! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Its okay, I got a plan.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Were gonna find love!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Definitely!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah, Im pretty confident about that. Thats what makes it soeasy for me to be 80% happy for Monica and Chandler! It would be nice to have a littleguarantee though.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What do you mean?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well yknow, some people make deals with a friend, like if neitherof them are married by the time theyre 40, they marry each other.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You mean a backup?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Exactly!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah I got that.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 You do?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hm-mmm.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Who?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Joey.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Joey?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Are you serious?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, I locked him years ago!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wh So If neither of you are married by the time youre40, youre gonna marry Joey.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yep, we shook on it. Yeah but believe me that is not how he wanted toseal the deal.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, seriously?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ohh, yeah. I think his exact words were 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Charming.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well hey, its just a backup.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey Monica!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Have you seen Rachel? Or a mirror?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 This is for my boat, pretty cool huh?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, its great.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, whats the matter?! Talk to the captain!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Im just having one of those days where you realize youre ina dead-end relationship!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Chandler giving you a hard time huh?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Its not like I want to get married tomorrow! Its just thatI-Id like to believe that Im in a relationship thats actually goingsomewhere, that Im not just wasting my time!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, you know Chandler.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 No I dont know Chandler! Not anymore! Its like itslike somethings changed.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Maybe you changed?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I didnt change!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Maybe thats the problem.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Chandler is a complex fellow, one who is unlikely to take a wife.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Is that some kind of boat talk?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I dont know!  I havent totally decided how totalk on my boat yet.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 What does he think? Does he think Im just gonna wait around fornothing?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Monica face it, Chandler is against marriage. And-and always will be!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Well theres some people who do want to marryme.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 There are?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah! Richard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 R-R-Richard said he wants to marry you?!  And-andChandlers tellin ya how much he hates marriage?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Thats right.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Chandler loves marriage!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 You just told me that he hates marriage! That-that hes a-a complexfellow whos unlikely to take a wife! That-that hes against marriage and alwayswill be!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 You got that from what I said?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Narrator	 When the Cretaceous period ended, the dinosaurs were gone.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 What happened you guys?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Rach!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hey you!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, come on in.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh thank you. Hey yknow, Im so sorry to hear about you andElizabeth.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh, thanks. Yeah, I really thought wed be able to make it work, butuh, I guess it just wasnt meant to be.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah, love. Its a tricky business isnt it?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 I guess so.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 So what do you say we make a pact? If you and I are both single by thetime were 40, we get married. I mean, we know each other, we like each other, andweve-weve already slept together so yknow therell be no surprisesthere! You know what I mean? No like, "Whats that?!"
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Right. Ohh! You-you want me to be your backup.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Exactly.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Ohh, yeah I already have one.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 What? Who?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Phoebe.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Phoebe?! Wait abut-but she just, she said that Joey was herbackup.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Ohh, I dont think so.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ross! I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joeymade a deal!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Thats impossible! I mean we have had a deal for years!We-we-we shook on it, although believe me she wanted to do a lot more than that.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Where the hell have you been?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I was making a coconut phone with the professor.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Richard told Monica he wants to marry her!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah, Ive been trying to find ya to tell to stop messing withher and maybe I would have if these  damn boat shoes wouldnt keepflying off!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 MyOh my God!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I know! They suck!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hes not supposed to ask my girlfriend to marry him! Imsupposed to do that!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I know!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well what Yknow what Im gonna do? Im gonna goover there; Im gonna kick his ass!  Will you help me?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Look, Chandler I dont think us getting our asses kicked is asolution. Okay? Just go and find Monica!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Youre right.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.  Im gonna get the ring!Im gonna get the ring!  Im gonna go find her and  Im just going to propose!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay great.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Dude-dude-dude!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Let me know about that coconut phone, it might great for the boat.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Hi.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Hi.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I dont know why Im here.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I didnt ask. You wanna come in?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I dont know.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh, okay. Well, Ill just leave the door open and go sit on thecouch. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Chandler is such an idiot!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	  Drink?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, Ill have a scotch
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 on the rocks with a twist? I remember. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  Still smoking cigars?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Uh, no! No! Thatsart! If it bothers you I can put my artout.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 No thats, thats okay.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 So Monica let me ask you a question. Yknow, since we broke up doyou ever, think about me?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Uh yeah, I-I actually I thought about you a couple months ago.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh really?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah but it was because I-I had an eye exam and I dont like my neweye doctor.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Who is it?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Edward Nevski?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Yeah hes no good. Do you ever  think about me in a non-eye doctor way?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 No.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Ahh.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 But getting over was the hardest thing that Ive ever had to do.And I never let myself think about you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Phoebe! You picked Joey and Ross?! You can not have two backups!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Of course I can! Its just good sense to backup your backup! Look,Ive already lost Chandler!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 What?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	  Hey!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Phoebe! Were both  your backup?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Phoebe, how could you do this to me?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I dontLook I dont know what youre complainingabout now? You were both aware of the situation!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 No we werent!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 I was not!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay, this kind of back talk is not gonna fly when were married!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Phoebe you cant have both of them! You have to pick one!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Pick me!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 No! Pick me! I dont want to end up an old maid!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 All right well lets see, Ross is a good father, but Joey has aboatThis is hard!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 This is crazy! Hey look, I wanna switch to Rachel!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 Ooh, I wanna switch to Rachel too!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No wait! JustOkayJust wait! You guys! Wait you guys!Dont make any rash decisions, okay? Just remember my promise, when we get married,three times a week.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh God, Phoebe!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Im talking about massages.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay, yknow what?! I know-I know how to settle this! All righthere, this is what were gonna do! Im gonna write Joey on one napkin and Im gonna right Ross on the other napkin  and we are going to pick one!And that person is going to be our backup! Okay?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay thats fair.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Ross	 All right.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Good!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Pick one.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Left!  Thank you.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Youre welcome.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Ross!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	  Joey!  We should just switch.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah absolutely! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	  I missed you-you ugly, flat faced old freak!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Excuse me?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh!  Him.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh.  Whew!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I missed this apartment! Now, this is a grown-ups apartment!Yknow, I-I should be with a grown-up, do you know what I mean?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Yeah! Youre saying, you need to be with someone more mature.Maybe someone with, a license to practice medicine. Or a mustache.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow, lets face it, Im not a kid anymore! I-I need tobe with someone who-who wants the same things that I do! I mean coming to my place of workand telling me that you love me, I want that! Talking about pig sex over lunch, I dontwant that!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I think thats fair.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Fair? Please dont even talk to me about fair! Fair wouldvebeen you wanting to marry me back then! Or fair wouldve been Chandler wanting tomarry me now! Believe me, nothing about this is fair! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Its okay! Shh! Hey. Hey.  Shhhh. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Nothing.  I dont knUmm. I dont know. Umm
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I know. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yknow, I-I I have to figuresome stYknow,some stuff before I can
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Yeah, I understand. Take as much time as you want.  Ten, eventwenty minutes if you need it. Ill be here. Not smoking. 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Chandler.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Where is she? Im not scared of you! 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Shes not here and please come in.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	  Scotch on the rocks, with a twist, on acoaster? Ha-ha, Monica! Monica!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Okay, she was here, but she left.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well where did she go?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well she said she had to think things over.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh my God, I cant believe this! Yknow, I thoughtIthought you were a good guy.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Oh, hey look nothing happened.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Nothing happened? Nothing? So you didnt tell my girlfriend thatyou love her?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well all right, one thing happened?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yknow what? I cant believe this! Do you know what you did?My girlfriend is out there thinking things over! You made my girlfriend think!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well Im sorry.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 And what does she have to think about? I love her!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well, apparently Im willing to offer her things that you are not.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 But I am willing to offer her all those things. This was just aplan, yknow? A way to throw her off course so that when I offered her all thesethings, shed be surprised!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 Well if it helps, it worked very well.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 It was working until you showed up, you big tree! I mean, thisisnt fair. You had your chance with her! You had your chance and you blew it! Andthis is my chance and I am not going to blow it because we are meant for eachother! And this is all just been one stupid mistake!  I was gonnapropose tonight.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 You were gonna propose? 
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah I even  got a ring.  Didyou get a ring?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 No I dont have a ring!  You go get her Chandler. And can I give you a piece of advice? If you do get her, dont let her go. Trust me.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yknow Richardyou are a good guy.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Richard	 I know.  I hate that!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Dude!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I cant talk to you now, I gotta find Monica!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Shes gone.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Shes gone. She had a bag and she left.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 What are you talking about?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 She was all crying. She-she said you guys want different things, and thatand that she needed time to think.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well why didnt you stop her?! Why didnt you just tell herit was a plan?!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I-I did! I told her everything, Chandler! But she wouldnt believeme.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well where Where did she go?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 To her parents I think and she said you shouldnt call her. Butif I were you I would.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 I cant believe I ruined this.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 I am so sorry man.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 You wanted it to be a surprise.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh my God.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. As tofall in love with my bestmy best Theres areason why girls dont do this!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay!  Okay! Okay! Oh God, I thought Wait a minute, I-I can do this.  I thought that itmattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thing that matters isthat you,  you make me happier than I ever thought I could be.  And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my life trying to make youfeel the same way.  Monica, will you marry me?
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Yes.
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 I knew you were likely to take a wife!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	  Can we come it yet?! Were dying out here!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Come in! Come in! Were engaged!!!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ohhh, this is the least jealous Ive ever been!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh no wait no, this is wrong! Ross isnt here!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh hell, hes done this three times! He knows what its about!
06	24-25	0624-25	The One With The Proposal, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Hey, whats going on?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Hey.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 I found a note on my door, "Come to Monicas quick, bringchampagne and a Three Musketeers bar."
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	  Yeah Ill take that.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Whats up?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Monica and I are engaged.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oh my God.  Congratulations.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Thanks.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Where is she?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Im engaged!!!!!! Imengaged!!!!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Yeah, shes been out there for twenty minutes, Im surprised youdidnt hear her on the way over.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oh, I thought it was just a kid yelling, "Im gay! Imgay!" Can I bring her in?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Oh no, let her stay out there. Its sweet.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Im getting married!!!! Im gonna be a bride!!!!  No, I will not shut up because Im engaged!  Ohh, bigtalk! Huh, why dont you come over here and say that to me?! Huh, buddy?! Yeah, myfiancee will kick your ass!  Come on, apartment 20!Apartment 20!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Okay, you get her in here.  You bolt the door.Ill be in the closet.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Okay! Wait-wait-wait! Shhh!  Okay, umm, I just wanna say thatI love you guys so-so much and-and thank youfor being here on my special night.  Our special night. Imean it just wouldnt be myour-our night, if you all werent here tocelebrate with meusDamnit!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Its okay, I want this to be your night too. To Monica.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Awww, come onwaitstop it. Okay, to Monica.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 To Monica!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 So have you decided on a band for the wedding? Because, yknow,Im kinda musical.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah Pheebs, honey, she just got engaged a couple of hours ago. I doubtshes even had time to
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Well speaking of chiming in, remember the time you burned down myapartment?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	  Yeah, youre on your own.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Yknow what we should do? We should all get dressed up and go tohave champagne at The Plaza.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 But I-I-I cant stay too long, I gotta get up early for a commercialaudition tomorrow and I gotta look good. Im supposed to be playing a 19-year-old. What?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 So when you said, "Get up early," did you mean 1986?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 You guys dont think I look 19?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Oh, 19! We thought you said 90!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Okay everybody, lets go! Lets go!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Okay.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Okay.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	  Hey, is uh the rest of my candy bar around here?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Oh honey no, you ate it all.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 I was afraid of that. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Yknow what shoes would look great with thisring? Diamond shoes!  Youre not getting dressed.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Know what I mean?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Yeah, but I dont think we have time.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Theres gonna be a wedding. Youre gonna be the bride. Twohundred people are going to be looking at you in a clean white dress.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Lets do it! 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Chandler! It happens to lots of guys! You-you-youwere probably tired, you had a lot of champagne, dont worry about it!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Im not worried, Im uh, Imfascinated. Yknow its like uh, Biology! Which is funny because in high schoolI uh, I-I failed Biology and tonight Biology failed me. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Check it out. Okay, I can play this when the guests are coming in. Okay. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Phoebe!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 If you wouldve let me finish, it goes on to say that hesprobably not gay.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Sure, you guys dont have this problem, youre made of wood. Hey!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Hey!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 You look great!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	  Oh, thanks.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 You okay over there?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 I dont know, yknow? I feel a little umm No,yknow what? Nevermind, Im gonna be fine.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Oh, dont worry about it I mean you probably were tired, you hada lot of champagne, it happens to everybody.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Hey!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Hi!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Wow! Happy Monicas night!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Well thank you, you too.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Thanks.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Hey, do you believe this? Do you believe they are actually gettingmarried?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Well sure. But I get married all the time so
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Ohh
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 You okay?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah, I guess. I-I I mean, do-do you think were ever gonnahave that?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 You mean, weyou and me?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no-no-no, no, no! We, you with someone and me with someone.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oh good, you scared me for a minute.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Shake it off.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 I meanno, its just cause, its just cause youand I were like a nightmare.  No, but there was some good times.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 No, absolutely. Yknow like it was umm
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Surely you can think of something good.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah, just give me a minute!  Oh well, yes, I can think of onegood thing.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 What?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Well you uh, you were always really good at the uh, at the uh the stuff.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Yeah? I was good at the stuff huh?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Uh-hmm, uh-hmm, yeah, yeah, I really liked your hands.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 My hands?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Yeah?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  Way to go guys. Yknow, you-you were really good atthe stuff too.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Oh, I know. Hey, yknow what we never did?  Ohno, not that.  We uh, we never had bonus night!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 A what?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yknow, bonus night. Yknow, when two people break up but theyget back together for just one night.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 One night, just-just sex. No strings attached?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah-yeah, we never had that,
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 No.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Okay, this is getting a little crazy. I mean, Im-Im sure itwould be amazing but Igotta say I really-really dont think it would be a goodidea. Yknow? I really, reallydont.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Sup? Sup dude?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Take whatever you want, just please donthurt me.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 So youre playing a little Playstation, huh? Thatswhack! Playstation is whack! Sup with the whack Playstation,sup?! Huh? Come on, am I 19 or what?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Yes, on a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the dumbest a person can look,you are definitely 19.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Come on man, really how old?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Young! Youre a man-child okay?! Now go get changed becauseeverybodys ready and please, oh please, keep my underwear!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Wow thanks! 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Joe?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Yeah!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Uhh, youve had a lot of sex right?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 When? Today? Some, not a lot.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Well, its just the reason that Im asking is because I kindof eh, uh, I was unable toI mean I really wanted too, but I couldnt.There huhhmm, there-there was an incident.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Dont worry about that man, that happens.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Its happened to you?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Yeah! Once.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Well, whatd you do?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 I did it anyway.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Phoebe! Come on! Lets go!  Come on!  Why arent you dressed yet?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Im sorry, but I just wrote the best dance song for your wedding.Check this out. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  No, Phoebe, Ill tell you what, ifyou get ready now Ill let you play it at the wedding.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Really?! Oh thats so exciting! Thank you! Thanks Mon! Oh but Mon,if you touch my guitar again Ill have to pound on you for a little bit.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Fair enough, now go get ready!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Okay. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Ill get everybody else , finally we can start celebratingmyIm sorry, uh apparently Ive opened the door to the past.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Okay, Monica. Mon, uh what-what you just saw
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Can I ask you just a little question, huh? Why tonight?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 What?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 See, Ive been waiting my whole life to be engaged, and unlike somepeople Im only planning on doing this once. So, uh yknow, maybe this isselfish and Im sorry about it, but I was kinda hoping tonight could just be aboutthat.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Oh honey, but it is just about
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 It is! It is!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 No its not! No! No! Now its about you and Ross getting backtogether!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 What?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 See yeah umm, you kinda stole my thunder!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Okay! Ho-ho! We did not steal your thunder because we are notgetting back together!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah. No. And you know what? Nobody even saw!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Yeah!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Thats true.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Honey I swear it we just kissed. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 It was just a kiss. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 You guys kissed!!!!! What does this mean?!! Are you, are you gettingback together?! Can I sing at your wedding?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Thunder being stolen!!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Okay come on Phoebe, its nothing! Monica, come on!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Look lets not make a big deal out of this! It was a one timething. It doesnt even matter!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Oh my God! I cannot believe you guys are talking about this! The problemsin the bedroom are between the man and the woman!!! All right?!! Now Chandler is doing thebest he can!!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  I dont think thats what they were talking aboutJoe!!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 What a great night, Chandler cant do it, these guys kissed
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 What? 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 What?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 You guys kissed! Oh mythis is huge!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 No!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oh no!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 No-no, its really not huge.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 And; people thinking its huge has led Monica to believe that weare stealing her thunder.  Which we are not!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Well, were still talking about it, arent we?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Well yeah, that and Chandlers problem.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Monica-Monica-Monica-Monica, listen-listen, listen, listen, would-would itmake you feel better if we all stop talking about Ross and Rachel.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Yes that would be lovely.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 You got it. Okay. Now, I can pass for 19 right?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Yes, you can pass for 19.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Really?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Yes!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Seriously?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Seriously? Seriously, no! You can play your own age which is 31!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	  Im 30!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Joey, you are not! Youre 31.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	  Aww crap!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Okay, so The Plaza! Okay, well get us some Mai Thais, maybe no more for you though.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Yknow what? I-I think that umm, I dont feel like going to ThePlaza.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Why?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Honey, Monica, this is ridiculous! Look
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 No-no, I-I really dont want to talk about it! I dont!  Especially with you. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Psss, that is whack!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	  Yeah?  Okay, I thinkIll play it at the wedding.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Yeah! Well, I think well see if they actually let you play. Huh? Imean they tell you anything you want to hear like-like, "You look 19," and thenthey just take it away like-like, "No you dont."
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Well, I dont think Monica is gonna take this away.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Wouldnt she?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Would she?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Would she?  Youate my candy bar!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Guess who? 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Hey.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Hey, I just realized we kinda let some stuff up in the air
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 What do you think Monica mean when she said she didnt want totalk, especially with me? I mean, why not especially you and me? We were both out therekissing.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Still thinking about it huh?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Come on! Serious-ser-ser-seriously, what did she mean by that? Especially you!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  Oh, who cares?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 I care!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  And so do I.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yknow what, I-I have to go talk to her, would you let me just getchanged?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Okay. Sure. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Am I going to let you watch me undress?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  No! 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I cant believe her, yknow its justits sotypical.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Now Monica, I know youre upset, but dont forget. There isgoing to be a wedding, you are going to throw the bouquet, and then theresgoing to be a honeymoon, maybe in Paris.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Paris?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 We will take a moonlit walk on the Rue de la .
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Keep talking.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Then we will sprinkle rose pedals on the bed and make love. Not justbecause its romantic, but because I can!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I love you!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Bonjour, monsieur.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Okay, dont say anything, you might scare it away.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Its Paris, who knows were here!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Hi Pheebs, whats up? 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Okay, you said I could sing at your wedding so, Im just gonna needa small deposit.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 What?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Yknow, just some good faith money to hold the date.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Pheebs, were not giving you a deposit for our wedding!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Oh, I see. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 They break your heart, dont they?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Yknow, I dont really their permission.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 Yeah! If you wanna sing at their wedding, well you sing at their wedding!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Yeah! And if you wanna look 19, then you You gotta do somethingabout your eyes.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 What?! Whats wrong with my eyes.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 They give you away! Theres just-theres just too much wisdomin there.  Just put some tea bags on there for like 15 minutes.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Joey	 And thatll get rid of my wisdom?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Maybe just 10 minutes for you.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Oh, give her the deposit! Give her the ring! I dont care!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Yes.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Monica, what did you mean before when you said you didnt want totalk to anyone, especially me?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 What a great apology!  And you accept! Okay, bye-bye!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 No-no, seriously-seriously, what was the especially me part about?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Well, lets just say its not the first time youvestolen my thunder.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 What?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  Hey, heres a thought.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Monica, what are you talking about?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 My Sweet Sixteen! Remember, you went to third base with my cousinCharlie.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Ahh, third base.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Its all everybody at the party could talk about!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Monica, yknow what? The only reason I did that was because yourparty was so boring!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  We had a characturist!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Oh!! 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	  
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Monica, your Sweet Sixteen was like a million years ago.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 And yet, here we are doing it again.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Ugh, Monica I dont want to steal your stupid thunder!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Oh please! Why else would you have made out with Ross?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Got me. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 All right, easy mimey, the moment has passed, it aint gonnahappen!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I just thought it would be nice if I could have just this one night!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 I swear, I never wanted any part of your night!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Oh, is that why you did it the secret hallway where nobody ever goes?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Uh, Rachel, Ive been thinking. I dont think us gettingtogether tonight is such a good idea. Im calling it off.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Why to save your dignity my man.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	  Monica, why? Why would I ever want to take away fromyour night?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I dont know! I dontmaybe youre feeling a littleresentful. Maybe ah, maybe you thought youd get married first! Maybe you cantstand the fact that your formally fat friend is getting married before you!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Oh wow. Thatyknow what? That is so unfair. Yknow what?Now I want to steal your thunder! Come on Ross, lets go have sex!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  I cant believe youre gonna have sex onmy engagement night!!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Well, somebody should. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Look uh, if were gonna do this
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Were not gonna do this, all right? Shes just gonna thinkthat were doin it.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oh, I see, so everybody wins. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Who is it?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Its Monica, open up!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Okay well Ross! Stop it please! Wait a minute! 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 Oww!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah, you like that baby?  Maywe help you?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I just wanted to say that I hope you do have sex tonight and I hope thatyou guys get back together, but I must warn you, the night that you announce yourengagement Im going to announce that Im pregnant!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 How is that ever going to happen?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 I know why!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 No you dont know why!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 Okay! Why?!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Because! Because I was sad.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	 What do you mean?
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Look, I am soso happy for you guys, but you getting married justreminds me of the fact that Im not. Im not even close. And I dont know,maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. And I know that thats dumb, but ohmy God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler!
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  I dont care, she slept with me.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Anyway sweetie, I am, Im so sorry I ruined your night.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Monica	  Im sorry I almost made you sleep with Ross.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  Well, Im going to take off.  Congratulationsman.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Thanks.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	  And uh, Rachel.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Ross	 What can I say, you missed your chance. From now on the only personwhos going to enjoy these bad boys  is me.  
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	  Hey! Heres a dollar, consider ita deposit. Please sing at our wedding.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Oh thank you.
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Chandler	 Okay. 
07	01	0701	The One With Monica's Thunder	Phoebe	 Now  "Who will perform the ceremony!Who will perform the cerOhoh! All right, Ill pound on him in the morning.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hey!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Hi!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Who wants French toast?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Oh, Ill have some!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Good, me too.  Eggs and milk are in the fridge.Thanks.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	  Oww!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Whats the matter honey?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 I dont know, my hand feels weird. I guess its because,Im engaged!  How long before it starts getting annoying?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 It starts?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Yeah, so lets get started on the wedding plans!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Okay! 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	  Already?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Yeah, we got a lot to do! We gotta think about the flowers, thecaterers, the music
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Oh, I got some thoughts on that.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Oh wait Chandler, too many cooks
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Take from me, as the groom all you have to do is show up and try to saythe right name.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	  Okay! 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 What in Gods name is that?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Oh my God, the wedding book?! I havent seen that since the forthgrade!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 This baby has got everything. Take yknow, locations for instance. First, organized alphabetically, thengeographically, then by square footage. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 That is so smart!  Break it off. Break itoff now.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 And that should conclusively prove that I had the idea for JurassicPark first! Now lets take a look at 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Hey! Ross!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Phoebe, oh my God! Wh-wh-what are you doing here?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 I need to talk to you, its pretty urgent. Its about Monicaand Chandler.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Oh my God! Of course, of course.  Umm, would you pleaseexcuse me for a moment? Umm, do you know each others hometowns? Why dontyou  Wh-whats going on?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Well, umm, not much. But, I was just thinking that since those guys justgot engaged that maybe it would be nice if they had some privacy, yknow? So, could Ijust move in with you for a couple days?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Umm, okay, yeah, sure. But wh-whats wrong with Monica and Chandler?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 NothingWhy?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Phoebe, you said it was urgent!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Oh yeah it is! Im going to the movies and it starts in like fiveminutes.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Do you realize I have a classroom full of students?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	  Oh, Im sorry. Im so rude. Does anyone wantto come to the movies?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 All right, so I havent cleared the budget with my parents yet, buttell me how this is for music.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Okay.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 All right umm, a string quartet for the procession.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Aw.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 A jazz trio for cocktails. The Bay City Rollers for dancing.Wait, that was from my sixth grade wedding.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, you couldnt get them anyway. Ian doesnt plan anymoreand Derrick  And Derrick is a name Ishouldnt know.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	  Hey Mon, do you have another pillow?  Yknow, something a little snugglyer?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Why are you napping over here instead of over at your place?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Well, the duck
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 What?! The duck?! What the hell did the damn duck do now?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Uh, well he did not get sick somewhere in there and it wasimmediately found and properly cleaned up!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Now, do I get to look at this book or is it just for people who areactually involved in the wedding?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Of course you can look at it! Yeah, I want your opinion too!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Okay.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Here you go! What do you think about centerpieces?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Centerpieces!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Yeah! Roses or Lilies? 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Definitely roses.  Well, I justthink theyre a little more weddingy. But Lilies are the clear choice.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Oh my God! Its like one mind.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Uh-huh!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	  Guys! Guys!! You gotta let me nap! Ugh, Imgonna get cranky!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Joey, there is a perfectly good couch across the hall!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Yes it is perfectly good, and it is not one of the places the duckgot sick!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 What?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 All right, Im gonna go! 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Now Joey, what did the duck do?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 I dont know! But he did not eat your face cream!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hey little buddy, how are you feeling?  What the hell is in that face cream? Thats so soft. Pillowcases!  Zelda looked at the chimney sweep. Her father, the vicar The vicar?  wouldnt be homefor hours. Her loins were burning. She threw caution to the wind and reached out andgrabbed his Whoa!  Whoa-ho-ho-ho! This is adirty book! 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Uh, Phoebe
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Oh Ross, hi.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Phoebe, what are you doing?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Im sorry, Im with a client right now.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Phoebe!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Okay, lets talk outside.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Phoebe, you cant massage people in my apartment!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Whats the big deal? I did it at Monica and Chandlers!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 And they knew about it?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	  Okay, well Ross, what is this really about?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Look, this is my home and I want to be able to come and go whenever Iwant!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Okay, I will find someplace else to do the rest of my appointments. Ijust dont know what the big deal is!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 The big deal is I dont want naked, greasy strangers in my apartmentwhen I want to kick back with a puzzlebeer! Cold beer.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Hey Joey, what cha doing?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Sweepin. Why? Turn you on?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 No.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Huh. What if I was sweeping a chimney?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Joey, did you my face cream?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Where are you going? The vicar wont be home for hours.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Joey,  where did you learn that word?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Where do you think,  Zelda?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  You found my book?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Yeah I did!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Joey, what-what are you doing going into my bedroom?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Okay, look Im sorry, I went in there to take a nap and I know Ishouldnt have, but you got porn!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Hey-hey, yknow what? I dont care! Im not ashamed of mybook. Theres nothing with a woman enjoying a littleerotica. Its just ahealthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 You got porn!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Hello.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Woman	 Hi, is uh Phoebe here?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Uh no-no, she-shes out for the night.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Woman	 Ohh great.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Can I, can I help you with something?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Woman	 Well, I dont know. Are you a masseur?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  Yes I am.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Woman	 Great!  Dad!  Thank you somuch, Ill be back to pick him up in an hour.  
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 So Chandler, youre parents mustve been thrilled whenyou told them you were engaged.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Oh yeah, I should probably call them.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 I remember when we first got engaged.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Oh, I dont think I ever heard that story.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Oh dad, really you dont need to
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	  Well, Id gotten Judy pregnant. I stilldont know that happened.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	  You dont know how that happened?! Your dogthought my diaphragm was a chew toy!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 What a sweet story.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Well, at least youre not hearing it for the first time at yourfifth grade Halloween party.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 What?! They wanted a scary story!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Anyway, were really excited about our wedding plans, and well Iguess pretty soon well be making a big withdrawal from the Monica wedding fund. What?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 You tell her Jack, I cant do it.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 What happened? You still have the Monica wedding fund dont you?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 We have it. Only now, we call it the beach house.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 I dont believe you spent my wedding fund on the beach house!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 Were sorry honey, but we just assumed if you got marriedafter you turned 30 youd pay for it yourself.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 You bought the beach house when I was 23!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 Which means you had seven years of beach fun and you cant puta price on that sweetie.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 We really do feel bad about this though.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 We started saving again when you were dating Richard and then thatwent to hell, so we redid the kitchen.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 What about when I started dating Chandler?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 Well it was Chandler! We didnt think hed everpropose!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Clearly I did not start drinking enough at the start of the meal.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 I cant believe it! That there is no money for my wedding?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 We might still have some money, if your father didntthink it was a good idea to sell ice over the Internet.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 It seemed like such a simple idea.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mrs. Geller	 Stupid Jack, the word is stupid.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Mr. Geller	 All right, enough! I dont want to hear about it anymore! Good luck, Chandler. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Okay! Now, Im going to touch you.  Ohh,thats soft. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 I cant believe this. Do you think that your parents could help payfor it?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 I dont know, my mother spent most of her money on her fourthwedding. Shes saving the rest for her divorce. And any extra cash my father has hesaves for his yearly trips to  Dollywood.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Well what happened at dinner?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 My parents spent the money for our wedding!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	  My God! What did you order?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Wait, but theres no money! Well this is terrible! You guys aregonna have to get married in like a, rec. center!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Honey, its gonna be okay.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 No! No its not! Its not gonna be okay! It sucks! No swingband! No lilies!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 No, yknow what? Its gonna be okay. I mean you donthave to have this rustic Italian feast. Yknow? And-and you dont need, youdont need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown; you can wear offthe rack. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Look, it really is gonna be okay. The important thing is that we loveeach other and that were gonna get married.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Do you even understand what off the rack means?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Look, why dont you just pay for it yourself?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 How? I dont have any money.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, I have some.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 How much?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, close to  
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Whoa!!! Are you kidding me?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Well what?! How-how much is it?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Its enough for wedding scenario eight.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Ohh!  Really?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	  How great are you, you little saver?! I mean, the-theamount you have is exactly the budget of my dream wedding!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  Ohh, you guys are so made for each other.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, youre not suggesting that we spend all of the money on thewedding?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel, Monica	 Ah, yeah!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, come on, Ive been saving this money for six years and Ikinda had some of it earmarked for the future, not just for a party.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	  Wow!  Hello, Mr.Chandler.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 This is the most special day of our lives.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 No, I realize that honey, but Im not gonna spend all of themoney on one party.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Honey, umm I-I love you,  but umm, if you call our wedding aparty one more time, you may not get invited. Okay?  Listen, we could alwaysearn more money, okay? But uh, were only gonna get married once.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Look, I understand, but I have to put my foot down. Okay? The answeris no.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 You-youre gonna have to put your foot down?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Yes, I am!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Wow, money and a firm hand. Finally a Chandler I can get on board with.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hey Rach.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  Joey.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hey Rach, do you smell smoke?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Uh-huh, I get it, smoke, chimney, chimney sweep, very funny, ha-ha.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 No-no-no, Im serious. You dont smell it? Somethings onfire.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Well no, I dont smell anything.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Oh, yknow what? Its probably just your burnin loins.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  Hey, what are you guys, what are you guys talking about?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Nothing!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  Damn, this coffees cold! Hey Rach, do you mind if Iheat this up on your loins? 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Yknow, I can not believe you told him, Joey!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 So I guess you bought that book after we broke up huh?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was withyou. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  Oh yeah, yeah? Well uh, when we were going out, I read tonsof porno magazines!   Sup?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	  Ross! How could you do that to an old man?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  Excuse me ladies.  Im sorry?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 My massage client, Arthur? His daughter called and said that some guythat worked for me gave him a really weird massage this afternoon.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	  I gave him an extremely professional massage!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 He said you poked at him with wooden spoons.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Okay, so it wasnt uh, a traditional massage. But I did give himaccu-pressure with a pair of chopsticks. And, and I gently exfoliated him with, with amop.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Well, hes never coming back! Okay? You just cost me eight dollarsa week!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 Hey, yknow what? This is your fault! Youre the one thatdidnt move his-his appointment.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Phoebe	 Oh, its my fault?! You didnt have to massage him! Youcouldve sent him away! You couldve not rolled Tonka trucks up and downhis back!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 He said he liked that!! Oh youre right, youre right. Imsorry.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Dude, what are you massaging an old man for?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Ross	 His daughter was hot.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Gotcha.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Hey.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Hey.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Listen umm, Ive been thinking, its not fair for me to askyou to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard forthat.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Ehh.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Eh, you work for that.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Look, I thought about it too, and Im sorry. I think we shouldspend all of the money on the wedding.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 You do?!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Yeah, Im putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I toldyou that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makesyou happy then, then thats what were gonna do.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Oh, youre so sweet.  Oh, but wait, what aboutour, what about the future and stuff?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids,yknow? Well pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 You thought about that?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Yeah.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 How many kids were we gonna have?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Uh, four, a boy, twin girls and another boy.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 What else did you think about?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Well, stuff like whered we live, yknow? Like a small placeoutside the city, where our kids could learn to ride their bikes and stuff. Yknow,we could have a cat that had a bell on its collar and we could hear it every time itran through the little kitty door. Of course, wed have an apartment over the garagewhere Joey could grow old.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	  Yknow what? I-I dont want a big, fancy wedding.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Sure you do.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 No, I want everything you just said. I want a marriage.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 You sure?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Uh-hmm.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 I love you so much.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 I love you.  Hey listen umm, when, when you weretalkin about our future you said cat, but you meant dog right.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Chandler	 Oh yeah, totally!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Monica	 Oh good.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hello, Zelda.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Who are you supposed to be?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 The vicar!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Do you even know what a vicar is?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Like a goalie, right?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  Yeah. Look Joey, its enough all right?! You keepmaking these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and itsImnotits just not funny anymore!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 All right, Im sorry. Rach IRach Im sorry. Okay? Imsorry! Maybe I can make up for it by, taking you roughly in the barn. 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 All right! Yknow what? Thats it! You wanna do it?!Lets do it!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Huh?
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  Thats right, I wanna do it withyou! Ive been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	  I-I-I-I did? 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	  Yeah! Ohh, Ive been waitinso long to get on that body!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 This body? 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Yeah thats right! Come on Joey; sex me up!
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 Hey-hey, youre startin to sound like the butchers wifethere in-in chapter seven.
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Rachel	 Oh, come on now, dont keep me waiting. Get those clothes off! But,I would keep that helmet on because youre in for a rough ride! 
07	02	0702	The One With Rachel's Book	Joey	 I dont want to, Im scared.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Hey, you guys!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross, Rachel	 Hey!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 So, what do you think?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 About what?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yeah, what?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 What?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Are you kidding? Okay, Ill give you a hint; Ill give you ahint. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Eyes! No, no. Your eyes! No. Chandlers eyes!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 I got glasses!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Well, you-youve always had glasses.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 No I didnt!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Are you sure?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yeah-yeah, did-didnt you use to have a pair? They were reallyround, burgundy, and they made you look kind of umm
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Feminine.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yes!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 No!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Sweetie, I think the glasses look great. They make you look really sexy.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Really?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Yeah!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	  You didnt think I used towear glasses, right?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Of course! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 So what do you guys want for an engagement present?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Thats okay Pheebs, were not having a party or anything, soyou dont have to get us
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	  If someone wants to give us a present, we dontwant to deprive them of that joy.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Oh, yknow what you should get em? One of those little uh,portable CD players.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Oh, I already have one. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Not unless someone borrowed it and left it at the gynecologist.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yeah, and-and-and by someone, she means Joey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Hey, I know I what I want!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 What we want honey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 No, you dont want this. I want to have your grandmotherscookie recipe.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 You mean the chocolate chip cookie recipe?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Uh-huh, yeah.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 You mean the one that my grandmother made me swear on her deathbed thatI would never let out of our family?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Dying people say the craziest things.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 I wanted it for years! I was gonna make cookies for my children.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Break my heartOh, all right.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Okay. Im gonna be the mom that makes the worlds bestchocolate chip cookies.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Our kids are gonna be fat arent they.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Ahoy!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Hey! Hows the boat?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Great! Im finally getting into this sailing stuff.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Oh, so you finally took it out of the marina huh?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Why would I do that? It took three guys to get the thing in there!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 If you dont sail your boat, what do you do on it?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Oh, its great! Its a great place to just kinda, sit, hangaround, drink a few beers, eat some chips. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Well, its good that you finally have a place to do that.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yknow Joey, I could teach you to sail if you want.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 You could?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yeah! Ive been sailing my whole life. When I was fifteen my dadbought me my own boat.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Your own boat?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 What?! What?! He was trying to cheer me up! My pony was sick.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Do you know what I was thinkin?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 What?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Nothing, I just like to go like this. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	  Hey Chandler, what are you doing tonight?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Uh why, do you have a lecture?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 No, why?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Then free as a bird. Whats up?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 My dad wanted to know if you wanted to play racquetball with us.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Wow! Thats great! Dad must really like you, he doesnt askjust anyone to play.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Yeah and he didnt really ask for you, he asked for Chancy, I assumedhe meant you.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Well, did-did you correct him?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 No, I-I thought it would be more fun this way.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 This is so cool, maybe this is something you can do every week.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Or you can sit with him on the front porch and make sure no one steals thetrash cans. He does that every week too.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Oh, just so you know, you-you have to let him win.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Yeah.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 He hates to lose.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Oh no problem, maybe Ill play with my left hand.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Youre not a lefty? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Does anybody know me?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Whats wrong Phoebe?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 I just went to my old apartment to get you the-the cookie recipe and thestupid fire burned it up!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 No!! Why didnt you make a copy and-and keep it in a fireproof boxand keep it at least a hundred yards from the original?!!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	  Because Im normal!That was the one legacy my grandmother left me, and I know you wanted it as anengagement present.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Oh, we have to get you an engagement present?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Dont worry about it Pheebs.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 No one got me an engagement present.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Okay, here I wish you health and happiness.  
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 An old cookie?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	  This is what happens when you dont register forgifts!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 See no-no, I made a batch and I froze it, and this is the only one left.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 We cant accept this.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Why not?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Cause its gross.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 No! Wait! I think I can figure out the recipe from this cookie! I dostuff like this at work all the time.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Really?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Yeah! I bet I can do it.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Okay, we owe you a present.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Two! Ive been engaged twice!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Look at this clown! Just because hes got a biggerboat he thinks he can take up the whole river.  Get out of the way jackass!  Who names his boat Coast Guard anyway?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 That is the Coast Guard. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Joey, just ignore the boats all right? Were not finished with thelesson yet.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 All right.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Okay, Im just gonna go over the basic points just one more time,are you ready?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Come on Rach, not again. I got it! Okay? Lets start sailing, and Iwant to go over there  where that boatload of girls is! Yo-ho-ho!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Oh, okay. Is that what you want to do? You wanna go over and give alittle shout out to the old, hot chickas? Okay, lets do that Sailor Joe. Quickquestion though,  whats this called?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Uh, boat rope.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Wrong! How do you get the mainsail up?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Uhh, rub it?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 No. What do you do if I say we are coming about?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Id say, come again. No-no, wait I-I-I know this one, I know thisone, uh
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Times up, now your dead.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 And deaf!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Okay, you just go on and make your little jokey-jokes, but if you do notknow what you are doing out at sea you will die at sea. Am I getting through to yousailor?! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Yes.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Dont just say yes! This isnt a game, Joey you can really gethurt out here. Okay, so do you want to pay attention or do you want to die?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 I want to make a ship to shore call to Chandler.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 All right, I definitely taste nutmeg.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 You do?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 You dont?  Well, thats the difference between aprofessional and a layman.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 That and arrogance.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Hey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Hey! How was sailing?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 I dont want to talk about it. Yknow, you couldve atleast saved me a whole cookie. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica, Phoebe	 No-wait-no-no!!!!!!!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Women are mean!!! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 I cant believe that! Now the only thing left of mygrandmothers legacy is this crumb.  I wish you a long and happy marriage.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	  Hey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Hey! How was it?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Well I had a great time! Umm, Chancy on the other hand
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 I will tell the story! It was going great. I let him win. Wewere bonding. He even said I could call him dad.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 And what did he ask you not to call him?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Daddy. All right look, heres the story.  Well, we had just finishedplaying racquetball and we were gonna take a steam. I walk into the steam room and it wasreally steamy.  So I take off my glasses andthats when in happened.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Guys?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Over here. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Mr. Geller	 Have a seat son.  Hey!! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Oh my God Chandler! I cant believe it!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 I know.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 You gave my father a lap dance!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Why do they put so much steam in there?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Cause otherwise theyd have to call it the room room.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Why? Okay? Why? Wh-wh-why did that have to happen?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Come on, its not that big a deal!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Not that big a deal? Therethere was touching of things.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Now, I know you wanted to bond with my dad, but did you really have tobond to that part?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Listen, Im sure that dad doesnt care. He probably thoughtthis was funny; hell be telling this story for years!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 I dont want him to tell this story for years.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Oh, but he will. He still tells the story how Monica tried to escape fromfat camp.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 I wasnt escaping.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Then how did you get caught in the barbed wire?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 I was trying to help out a squirrel.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 You were trying to eat it!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 If that is your father calling to tell this story then themarriage is off!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	  Come on.  Hello? Im sorry you have the wrong number.   Okay, Ill call youlater dad. I love you. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	  All right, Im off to see your dad.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Whoa-whoa, arent you a little over dressed?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	  Yeah, and-and you better make sure he tips you this time.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 Look, I figured I would try to convince him not to tell the storyanymore, and I figure the best way to do that is face to faceAnd by face Idont mean his lap. And by face, I dont mean my ass. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	  Hey are you getting Monica and Chandler an engagement present?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 I dont know. Yknow, they didnt get us anything.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Thank you!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Hey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Hey.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Well hello! So, when are we gettin back out on the water matey? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Oh uh, I dont know the boat way to say this, but uh never!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Why not?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Because! Youre mean on the boat!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 What? I was just trying to teach you.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Well, lesson learned! Rachel is mean!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Yeeeeeep Yep-yep-yep-yep-yep. I remember when she took out on herdads boat she wouldnt let me help at all.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Excuse me, I wanted you to help, but you couldnt move your armsbecause you were wearing three life jackets.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 You have to respect the sea! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Look Joey, Im sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gottatell ya something. That was not mean. Okay, my father is mean. He used to yell at me allthe time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. I was just being a good teacher.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Does a good teacher say, "Put down the beer pinhead!?"
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Six and a half! You knocked that last one out of my hand! Remember?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Yeah, I didnt want you to get hit by the boom!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Well it hit me anyway! And it wouldve hurt a lot less if I hadfinished that last beer.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 All right, yknow what? I-Im sorry. I will try to tone itdown and uh stop yelling.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 You wont boss me around anymore?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 I wont boss you around.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 And youll be nice?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 And, Ill be nice.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 And youll be topless?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 AndJoey!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Do you want me to learn?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Okay, heres batch 22. Ohh, maybe thesell taste a little likeyour grandmothers. This has a little bit of orange peel, but no nutmeg.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Lets give it a shot.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Okay. Man, I have not made this many cookies since I was in theninth grade.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Oh, what was that for? Like a bake sale?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 No, just a Friday night.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Ohh, these are pretty good.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Yeah, but not as good as batch 17.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Which one was that?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 The ones we had right after you almost threw up.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Oh yeah! Batch 17 was good. I did not like batch 16.  Im okay.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Are there anymore from the good batch? Cause we could just workoff of those.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Yeah, ooh yeah, I think there is one from batch 17 left, uh  Its batch 16! 16people! Get out of the way! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Okay Joey honey, youre doing really good! All right, now Imjust gonna need you to step to the port side.  Remember? Remember how we talked about the port side?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Ohh yeah.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Right?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Nope.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Its left sweetie, but thats okay sweetie, thats atough one.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 I dont know why you just dont say left.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Okay, go to the left.  The left!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Huh?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	  Just sit over there!! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	  Okay! Okay, youre yelling again! See that?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 No! No-no, no-no-no, very quiet, said with love, no yelling.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Oh, yknow what? Since Im here, I think Im gonna have mea little beer on the port side. 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Okay Joey, were luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up thecunningham? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Uh, wow, you just said a bunch of stuff I didnt know there.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Joey, come on! We just went over this! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Oh, yknow, when we did that was when that bird was flying overheadwith the fish in his mouth. Did you see it? It was gross!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	  No! All right?! I did not see the bird! I did notsee the fish! I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson!I did not, because I was trying to teach you how to sail a boat! Whichobviously is an impossible thing to do!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 All right thats it! Youre yelling and I dont see youtaking your top off! I quit!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 What do you mean you quit?! You cant quit!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Why not?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Because youre not finished yet and I wont have it! Greens donot quit!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Greens? Im a Tribbiani! And Tribbianis quit!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Oh my God, wait did II just said Greens dont quitdidnt I?   Did I just say Greens dont quit?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Yes! Yes! You did and youre still yelling at me!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 No! No! No! Im not yelling at you, Im just yelling near you.Oh God Joey, ohh Im my father. Oh my God, this is horrible! Ive been trying sohard not to be my mother I did not see this comin. Oh, Joey, Im sorry.Im so sorry. I just wanted you to learn.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Well, hey I did learn.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Really?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Yeah! Come on.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Awww
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Yeah, its okay. I know what a mainsail is.  I know, I know to duck when the boom comes across. I-I know port isright.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Left.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Damnit!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Yknow, I bet it would actually make my grandmother very happy toknow that were trying to figure out her recipe. I bet shes l-l-lookin upat us and smiling right now.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Looking up?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Oh yeahNo, she was really nice to me, but shes in hell forsure.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Well, Ive tried everything. I give up. I guess Im not gonnabe the mom who makes the worlds best chocolate cookies. I do make the best duckconfit with broccoli rabe.  Kids love that right.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Aww, Pheeb, come on isnt there any relative that would have therecipe? What about, what about your sister?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Oh no-no, no, I made a promise to myself that the next time I would talkto Ursula would be over my dead body. And thats not happening til October 15th,2032.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Ross	 Thats the day youre gonna die? Seedarnit, Ive gotshuffleboard that day.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Thats what you think.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Well, I mean what about friends of your grandmothers?Wouldnt they have the recipe?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Well, yknow I may have relatives in France who would know. Mygrandmother said she got the recipe from her grandmother, Nesele Tolouse.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 What was her name?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Nesele Toulouse.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 Nestle Tollhouse?!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 Oh, you Americans always butcher the French language.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	  Phoebe, is thisthe recipe? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	  Yes!!  Ohh.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Monica	 I cannot believe that I just spent the last two days trying to figureout the recipe and it was in my cupboard the whole time!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Phoebe	 I know! You see it is stuff like this which is why youre burning in hell!!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 So you understand, Id feel a lot more comfortable if youdidnt tell people what happened. Yknow, Im a littleIm alittle embarrassed about it.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Mr. Geller	 I understand completely, theres nothing more horrifying thanembarrassing yourself in front of your in-laws. As a matter of fact, when I started datingJudy I was unemployed, and her father asked me what I did for a living and I told him Iwas a lawyer.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 What did you do when they found out?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Mr. Geller	 They never did, so if ever see me giving them legal advice just nodalong. Shall we? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Chandler	 So I guess we wear swimsuits in here!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Well Joey, I hate to admit it, your way of sailing is a lot more fun.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. Hey, why dont you give a pull on that rope? 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Ohh were not sailing.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Just pull on it.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 All right. Hey-hey-hey!!  Sandwiches!
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 What else?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	  Here you go.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Thank you.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Oh wow! 
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 What are you doing?
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Ohh, sorry.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 What youdont hold it like that! Youre lettin allthe good stuff fall out.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Rachel	 Ohh whoops.
07	03	0703	The One With Phoebe's Cookies	Joey	 Careful! Youre wasting good pastrami!  Oh my God! Im mydad!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Mac	  Well, if we learned one thing today C.H.E.E.S.E. is thatcheerleaders and high explosives dont mix. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	C.H.E.E.S.E	 You can say that again Mac.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Mac	 Well, I couldnt have done it without you buddy. Youre a genius.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	C.H.E.E.S.E	 Oh yeah? Well then how come I cant get my VCR to stopblinking 12:00?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  So, what did you guys think?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	  Hello?  Hold on please. Joey, its your mom.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Its your mommy. Its your mommy.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Ohhhh
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Thats nice.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Mom, so what did you think? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Well that was ummOkay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 It wasnt the best.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 That was one of the worse things ever. And not just on TV.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Wh-what are we gonna tell him?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Well, the lighting was okay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Ohh no you dont! You got lighting last time, lighting is mine!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 And I have costumes.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Oh great! That means Im stuck with, "So, we were watching youin there  and you were sittin right here! Whoa!"
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 What are you gonna do Pheebs?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 I dont know. I dont know. I cant lie to him again. Ohno Ino! Im just gonna press my breasts up against him.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 And say nothing?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, yeah thats right.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Wow! Well, my folks really liked it! So what-what didyou guys think?  Itwasnt that good.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Phoebe, do you think that your favorite animal says much about you?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 What? You mean behind my back?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Oh! Hi you guys, oh my God! Youll nevergonna believe happened to me today! I am sitting in my office and
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  You guys! You guys! Youre notgonna believe what my agent just told me!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Joey! Kinda in the middle of a story here!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Ooh, sorry. Sorry. You finish, go.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Okay, so anyway Im sittin in my office and guess who walksin.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Im gonna be on two TV shows!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica, Phoebe	 Oh, thats great!!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Joey!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Oh, you werent finished?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah! Guess who walks into my office is the end of my story.  It was Ralph Lauren!  Ralph Lauren walked into myoffice!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Uh Rach, if youre gonna start another story, at least let me finishmine.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Its the same story.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Wow, its really long.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Anyway, Ralph just came in to tell me that hes sohappy with my work that he wants me to be the new merchandising manager for polo retail.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Still get a discount on wedding dresses?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Im so happy for you!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Well, these really are the days of our lives.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 What?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Well, since you ask. They want me back on Days of Our Lives!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	  Oh God!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 I gotI get a big pay raise!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Oh hey!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Ill be playing Drake Remorays twin brother, Stryker!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Oooh!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 I get to hire my own assistant!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica, Phoebe	 Ahhh!!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  WellI got a head rush from standing up to fast rightthere.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  And you were at this job for four years?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Hilda	 Thats right.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Okay, well this is all very impressive Hilda, um I just have one lastquestion for you. Uh, how did I do? Was this okay?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Hilda	 What?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Ive never interviewed anyone before. Ive actually never hadanyone work for me before. Although when I was a kid, we did have a maid, but thisis-this isnt the same thing. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Hilda	 No dear. Its not.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 No. Yeah, and I know that. All right, well thank you so much for comingin it was nice to meet you.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Hilda	 Thank you! Good meeting you.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 All right.  Im a total pro!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Man	 Hello?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Wow! H-umm! Hi! Yes, uh Im sorry the models areactually down the hall.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Man	 Actually, Im here about the assistant job.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Really?!  Okay well then, all right, well just have aseat there. Umm, so whatswhat iswhats your name?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Man	 Tag Jones.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Uh-huh, go on.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Thats it. Thats my whole name.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Thats your whole name, okay of course it is! Okay, welllets-lets just have a look-see here. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I know I havent worked in an office before, and I really donthave a lot of experience, but uh
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Oh come on, what are you talking about? Youve got three yearspainting houses. Two whole summers at T.G.I. Fridays, come on!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Its lame, I know. But Im a goal-oriented person, very eager tolearn
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Okay, hold on just a second.  Im sorry, its for human resources, everybody has to do it.Could you just stand up please?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 No-no-no-no.  Hey! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	  Anyway, I should go. Okay, bye.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	  Hey sweetie.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Hi sweetie. So, what was with all the whispering?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 I cant tell you. Its a secret.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Secret? Married people arent supposed to have secrets betweenone another. We have too much love and respect for one another.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Awww.  But still no.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 No Im serious, we should tell each other everything. I donot have any secrets from you.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Really? Okay, so why dont you tell me what happened to Ross Junioryear at Disneyland?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Oh no-no, I cant do that.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 If you tell me, Ill tell you what Phoebe said.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Okay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Okay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 So, Ross and I are going to Disneyland and we stop at thisrestaurant for tacos. And when I say restaurant, I mean a guy, a hibachi, and the trunk ofhis car. So Ross has about 10 tacos. And anyway, were on Space Mountain andRoss starts to feel a little iffy.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Oh my God. He threw up?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 No, he visited a little town south of throw up.  So what was Phoebes secret?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Oh, Nancy Thompson from Phoebes old massage place is gettingfired.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Thats it?! I gave up my Disneyland story for that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Thats right! You lose sucker!!  Please still marry me.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Chandler, you have an assistant right?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	  Did she call? You-you told her I was sick right? Always tellher I am sick!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 No, I-I just dont know how you decide who to hire. I meanIve got it narrowed down to two people. One of them has great references and a lotof experience and then theres this guy
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 What about him?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 I love him. Hes so pretty I wanna cry! I dont know what todo. Tell me what to do.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Come on you know what to do! You hire the first one! You dont hirean assistant because theyre cute, you hire them because theyre qualified.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Uh-huh. No, I hear what youre saying and-and-and that makes a lotof sense but can I just say one more thing?  Look how pretty!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Lets see.  Oh my God! Oh But no! No!You cant-you cant hire him, because thatits not professional. Umm,this is for me  yes? Thanks. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Okay youre right. Ill hire Hilda tomorrow. Dumb old perfectfor the job Hilda!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Let me see this guy.  W-H-Wow!Dont show this to Monica! And dont tell her about the W-H-Wow!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Hey-hey-hey Joey!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Hey Terry!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Good to see you again!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Its been a while, huh? Wow, its funny these halls look smallerthen they used to.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Its a different building.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 So! Stryker Remoray huh? When do you want me to start?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Why dont we start right now!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Okay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Here are the audition scenes. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Audition? I thought you were gonnaoffer me the part.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Why would you think that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Well, I was Dr. Drake Remoray, Strykers twin brother. I mean, wholooks more me than me right?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Everybody has to audition.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Yknow Terry, I-I dont really need to do this. I got myown cable TV series,  with a robot.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Im sorry Joey thatsthats the way it is.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Well. I guess you think youre pretty special huh? Sittin uphere in your fancy small hall building. Makin stars jump through hoops for ya, huh?Well yknow what?  This is one star whos hoopThis is a star that the hoopthis hoopI was Dr. Drake Remoray!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Hi! Tag. What are you doing here?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I just wanted to come by and thank you for not laughing in my faceyesterday. And I noticed there arent any plants in your office so I wanted to bringyou your first  There is a plant in your office.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Kinda.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Right. So I guess I shouldnt put good at noticing stuff on my resume.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Oh-ohh, thank you.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Anyway, Im guessing you hired somebody.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Well
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Gotcha. Thanks again for meeting with me. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 But I hired you!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 What?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah! You-you got the job! Youre my new assistant!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I am?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I cant believe it!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Me either. Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairsand find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Hey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Hey! Good, youre home!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Oh its always nicer to here than, "Aw crap! Youagain!"
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Hey baby. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Hey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 I made you a surprise.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Oh yeah?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Yeah, tacos! Ever since you told me that story Ive had such acraving for them.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Did you not understand the story?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	  Hey!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Hey! Whats up?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Ross!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Oh, nothin much. Just trying to figure out what Im gonna dofor dinner.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Huh.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	  HeyOoh! Whats-whats that, dinnerstuff? You making dinner?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 No!  Shhh!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 What you got over there? Tacos?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 No! No. Theyre umm Theyre just uhground beefsmileys. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Uhh, those are tacos.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Excuse me Mr. Mexico.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Eh, either way Ill pass.  I still canteat those. Whats so funny?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	  Im not laughing. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	  You told her!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Nancy Thompsons getting fired! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	  Look, okay-okay I had food poisoning! Its not like Ichoose to do it! Its not likeIts not like I said, "Umm, what wouldmake this ride more fun?!"
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Youre right. I mean Im sorry. Yeah, I shouldnt belaughing. I should be laying down papers for you! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	  How could you tell her?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 I had too okay?! Were getting married! Married couplescant keep secrets from one another!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Oh really? Well I-I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Du-ude!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	  What happened in Atlantic City?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Well, Chandler and I are in a bar
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Did you not hear me say, "Du-ude?!"
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 And this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after awhile he-he goesover to her and uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know whatyoure thinking, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makesout with girls, and youre right, Chandlers not the type of guy who just goesto bars and makes out withgirls.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	  You kissed a guy?!! Oh my God.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Oh Mon, I laughed so hard
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Ho-ho, so hard we had to throw out your underwear again?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Whatever dude, you kissed a guy.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Hi!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Hey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 HeyOoh, hows Hilda? Is she working out?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Ohh, my new assistant is working out, yes.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Was she happy you gave her the job?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Oh, my-my new assistant has very happy that I hired my new assistant.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Hello?  Oh hey! Can you, can you hang on a second?  Its the producers over at Mac and C.H.E.E.S.E. can you excuse mefor a minute?  Hey, funny you should call. I was just looking over nextweeks script.  Canceled?!  Like theyre taking it off theair?  Ohh.  All right, see you Monday.  Were not evenshootin them anymore?!!  All right, bye!  They canceled Mac andC.H.E.E.S.E!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Sorry.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Im sorry Joey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Why would they do that?! It was a good show right?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 You wanna tell secrets?! Okay! Okay! In college, Ross used to wear legwarmers!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 All right! All right! Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-a-like contestand won!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Ross came in forth and cried!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Oh my God! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Oh, is that funny?! Oh, you-you find that funny?! Well maybe Chandlershould know some of your secrets too!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 I-I already told him everything!  You shush!!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Once Monica was sent to her room without dinner, so she ate the macaronioff a jewelry box shed made.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Ross used to stay up every Saturday night to watch GoldenGirls!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Monica couldnt tell time til she was 13!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Its hard for some people!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	  Of course it is.  Wowwhoa!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Chandler one time wore my underwear to work!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Hey!!!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Ohh, Im sorry I couldnt think of anymore for Ross!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Ohh! Ohh! In college, Chandler got drunk and slept with the lady whocleaned our dorm!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 That was you!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Whatever dude, you kissed a guy.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 How could this happen to me?! Yesterday I had two TV shows! Today,I got nothin!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Well wait a minute, what happened to Days of Our Lives?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Uh, well they might be a little mad at me over there.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 What happened?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Well maybe I got a little upset and maybe I told them where they could go.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Joey, why would you do that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Because they wanted me to audition!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 You! An actor?! Thats madness!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Rachel Greens office. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Tag?  Hi, who was that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	  Nobody. I was just practicing.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Really? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Hi!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Hi! Rachel Greens office.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 You must be Hilda.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah, this is Tag. Tag, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, can I see you for asecond? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Phoebe! Thats a great name.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 Oh, you like that? You should hear my phone number.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Okay. Well be right back. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 So you hired yourself a little treat did ya?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 All right I know, I know how it looks Pheebs, but Im tellingyou
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Phoebe	 But-but you know you cannot get involved with your assistant.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yes, I know that. I know that. And I know that hiring him was probablynot the smartest thing that Ive ever done. But Im telling you, from thismoment on I swear this is strictly professional.  Yes? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Kathy	 Hey Rachel!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Hi!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Kathy	 Cute assistant! Whats his story? Is he
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Gay? Yeah. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Hey! Terry.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 Joey Tribbiani! Im surprised your big head could fit through oursmall halls!  I gotta go Joey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Wait! Terry! WaitLookWait I-I Look, Im reallysorry about before. I was an idiot thinking Im too big to audition for you. Yougotta give me another chance.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Terry	 I cant help you Joey.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	 Wait! Terry! Please! Look, I just lost my other job. Okay? You have noidea how much I need this. Please, help me out, for old times sake.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Nurse #1	 This poor guys been in a coma for five years. Itshopeless.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Nurse #2	 Its not hopeless! Dr. Stryker Remorays a miracle worker.Look, here he comes.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Dr. Stryker Remoray	 Good morning.  Drake, its your brother Stryker. Can you hear me?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	The Director	 And cut!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Joey	  Im back baby! Ha-ha-ha!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Yknow, in my defense, umm there was no glitter on the macaroni andvery little glue.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 And in my defense, the cleaning lady came on to me!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	  You have no trouble telling time now right?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 No!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Quick! What time is it?! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 I dont know! Time to kiss a guy maybe?!  What areyou laughing at Pampers? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Yknow when I said that because were getting married thatwe should share everything and not have any secrets? 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Yeah?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Yeah that was stupid. Lets not do that.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Ohh, absolutely.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 And! We should keep all the stuff uh, we told each other secret fromeverybody else.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Yeah, definitely!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Okay,  if youll excuse me, I-Im gonna go hang outwith some people who dont know the Space Mountain story.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Monica	 Then, Id steer clear of Phoebe.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Ross	 Man! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Chandler	 Yeah, and not that you would, but I wouldnt hang outwithall the guys in my office.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Hi! 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Do you have a minute?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Well yeah, sure, whats up?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I got asked out twice today when I was at lunchby guys.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Oh really?!
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Yeah. Did you tell someone that I was gay?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Oh, did you not want people to know that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 But Im not gay. And I especially wouldnt want you to think Iwas gay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Whys that?
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 I dont think I should say.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Ohh, you can say. Come on, I dont want you to feel like youcant tell me things. 
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Okay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Kay.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Well
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Tag	 Id love to ask out your friend Phoebe.
07	04	0704	The One With Rachel's Assistant	Rachel	  Yeah, shes gay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Hey.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Whats the matter?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Someone on the subway licked my neck! Licked my neck!!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh Willies still alive!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 What are you guys doing?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Oh, my mom called, theyre gonna run our engagement announcement inthe local paper, so were looking for a good picture of us.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Oooh, Im afraid that does not exist.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Thats not true, there are great pictures of us!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 No, there are great pictures of you standing next to a guy whosgoing like this 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Thats the creep that youre with at the Statueof Liberty.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 I dont know what it is, I just cant take a good picture.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	  Oh, heres a great one.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Yeah, Im not in that.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 I know, but look at me all tan.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Hey, why dont you guys go, get portraits done by a professionalphotographer.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Thats a good idea! I bet they have one of those wind machines!Yknow 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah thats great! Next to that, Chandler wont look sostupid.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Chandler what do you say?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 All right, but I should warn you, Im not going. Im going.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	  Dude, that reverse lay-up! Oh
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 How about those three pointers?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Amazing!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 And those guys were this  close to lettin us play this time too.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hey look-look, Phoebes talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Oh, you guys call him Cute Coffeehouse Guy, we call him Hums While HePees.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Yes, and we call Ross Lingers In The Bathroom.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	  Hey you guys, Hums While He Pees just asked me out!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hey, I thought that guy was married.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 He is! But hes getting divorcedRoss! Maybe you know him.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Its not a club.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Phoebe, if this guys going through a divorce, is it such a goodidea to start going out with him?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Hey, divorced men are not bad men!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 They have that on the napkins at the club.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh, I gotta get back to work.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 You dont have to be back for a half-hour!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah but, my assistant Tag does sit-ups in the office during lunch. Ohh!I could just spread him on a cracker.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Rach, if you have a crush on this guy, why would you hire him? I meanyknow you cant date him right?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh no, I know that. I know that. Although, we made a joke that we spendso much time together he should call me his work wife.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Soon hell be able to call you, that lady he knew who got fired.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 I am not gonna get fired, because Im not gonna act on it.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 So you wouldnt mind if he was dating someone else?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Why? Is he? He is! Isnt he? Hes dating that slut inmarketing!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Maybe I should open a divorced mens club.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Dude that is so sad.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 I could put uh-uh a basketball court in the back.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Could I play?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh, no sit-ups today Tag?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 I just did them.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh, well drop and give me ten more!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 What?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Uh, I-I had a drink with lunch. Did those cost reports come in?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Yeah, I filled them out last night?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh, great could you make me four copies of those?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Hey Rachel!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	  Ahh, hi! Hi! Melissa, whats up? Im just uh, aboutto umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. Yknow, likedried fruit and granola and stuff. Whats up? 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Umm, is Tag here?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 No. Why?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Oh, I was gonna talk to him about doing something tonight.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Really?! Got a little crush on Tag there do ya?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Well, weve been flirting back and forth, but I was hoping thattonight it would turn into something a little more than that.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Okay, whoa-whoa easy there Melissa! This aint a locker room, okay?But, yknow I remember him saying that-that he had plans tonight.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Oh no!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh yeah. All right, back to work.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Melissa	 Hey! Isnt that Tags backpack.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah Melissa, I dont want to be known as the uh, office bitch, butI will call your supervisor.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	The Photographer	  Great! Thats great Monica! Great! Now,Chandler, you want to give us a smile?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Okay. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	The Photographer	 Im sorry, is the seat uncomfortable?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 No, I am.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Chandler, listen to me sweetie, I know you can do this. Okay? You have abeautiful smile.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 I do? 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Yeah!  Allright, maybe you dont have to smile. Lets try something else. Lets tryumm, try looking sexy.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Okay. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Or not.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hi Joey! What are you doing here?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Uhh, well Ive got an audition down the street and I spilled sauceall over the front of my shirt.  You gotan extra one?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah, sure. Ummhere. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Great.  You got anything thats not RalphLauren?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah, I dont think so Joe.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 All right, I guess this will be fine.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Nothing, why?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 How would you feel about taking out my assistant Tag? Ill pay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Huh, Rach I got to say its gonna take a lot of money for me to goout on a date with a dude.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Im not asking you to go on a date with him!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Really? Cause I could kinda use the money.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Joey, just-just he-hes new in town and I know he doesnt haveany guy friends. Just take him to like a ball game or something. Ill reallyappreciate it.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Yeah, okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Sure, no problem.  OohHey, donuts!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Okay. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 I know. Lets try a lookof far offwonderment. Okay,well-well gaze into our future and well think about our marriage and thedays to come.  Chandler! What is the matter with yourface?! I mean this picture is supposed to say "Geller and Bing to be married,"not "Local woman saves drowning moron!"  Hey!Dont laugh at him! Hes my drowning moron!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Aww! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Thats it! Take it! Take it! Take it!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 I like this one.  It seems to say, "I love you andthats why I have to kill you."
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 They cant all be bad.  Find the one where you makeyour bedroom eyes. Ohh, there it is.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Oh my God! Those are my bedroom eyes?! Why did you ever sleep with me?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Do you really want to pull at that thread?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Im having a really good time!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Hums While He Pees	 Me too! Im sorry that guy in the subway licked yourneck.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Ohh. No thats okay, hes a friend.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Hums While He Pees	 Hey uh, I dont mean to be presumptuous but I havethese two tickets to the ballroom dancing finals tomorrow night if you want to go?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah, I Well yknow I-I mean I missed the-the semi-finals, soId just be lost.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Hums While He Pees	 I know its really lame, but I got these tickets frommy boss andOh no! No! No! My God!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Okay, dont freak out. Ill go.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Hums While He Pees	 No its Uh, my ex-wife Whitney is out there. Icannot deal with her right now. That woman is crazy!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Okay, I know. Hold on.  Hey Ross?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Yeah?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah, umm thats Whitney , Kyles ex-wife out there,now do you think that you can yknow divert her so that we can slip out?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 What?! No!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Well okay but I have two tickets to the ballroom dance finals. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Look, I dont think so Pheebs.  All right, Ill do it.But just because youre a friend. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Hi Ginger.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 All right! I want my key back!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 I dont have it!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Its right there! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Ugh, okay Sherlock! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Look, Im sorry but you-you-you better go Pheebs.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 All right, well I just wanted to say thank you though for divertingKyles ex. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Oh yeahNoYoure welcome. Well talk about it later.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Hi Whitney.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 Hi Ross! You ready for breakfast?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Yep.  Okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	  Kyles ex-wife? You were supposed to divert her not dateher!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	  Hi! Im sorry, but can you give me asecond while I talk to this woman, who by the way did not spend the night.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 Sure.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Okay.   I did divert her and we endedup having a great time! Okay?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Watching ballroom dancing?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Yes! Thats where we realized we were both super cool people!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Well look-look, okay Ross, Kyle just told me some really badstuff about her.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Like what?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Like shes really mean, and shes over critical,and-andNo! She will paint a room a really bright color without even checkingwith you!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 And! She uses sex as a weapon!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Fine! Thank you for warning me. At breakfast Ill be on full alertfor room painting and sex weapons.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Youre still gonna go out with her?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Yeah!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Well, didnt you just hear what I said?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Pheebs come on! I mean, consider the source! Of course herex-husbands gonna say that stuff. Now, if youll excuse me
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	  No listen to me! She is crazy!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	  Uh, your door isnt sound proof.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 You see? Nothing is good enough for her!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Good morning.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hi Tag! Hey, so did you have fun with uh, with Joey last night?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Oh yeah! We went to the Knicks game.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Ohh thats nice.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Then we went to this bar and he hooked us up with all these women! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Wo-women? You mean like old women?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Well kinda old, like 30.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	  Oh.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 And I never used to be able to just talk to girls in bars, but I got like20 phone numbers last night.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Thats great! Wow man, so Joey mustve really taught you somestuff huh?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 A little.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	  How you doin?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 See? Thats a great smile! Easy. Natural. Now, pretend I have acamera.  Youre changing it!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 I cant help it!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 All right, all right, all right, all right, you wanna know what I do whenI take resume shots?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Borrow money from me?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Okay, firstfirst of all, you want to make it look spontaneous. Ilook down , look down, keep looking down; then I look up.  See? All right, now you try. Look down , youre lookingdown, keep looking down
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Why is there jelly on your shoe?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 I had a donut. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	  Hi!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Hey!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Hey!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 So uh, heard you had some fun with Tag last night.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Yeah! That guys all right!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah and you had fun teaching him how to be all Joey.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 What?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yknow, all the women.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Hey well, you cant teach someone to be good with women. Yknow,thats why I never had any luck with Chandler.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	  Im right here!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? Okay,just the idea of you and he and all these women, its justAnd I know hesmy assistant and I cant date himbut it just bothers me, all right?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Hey! No-no-no-no, you cant take him away from me! I got a greatpartner to pick up girls with! Finally!!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Im still right here!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 All right, will you, will you at least tell him how hollow andunsatisfying this, dating tons of women thing is!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	  What?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 I just dont want him to meet anybody until I am over mycrushAnd I will get over it. Its-its not like I love him, its justphysical! ButI mean I get crushes like this all the time! I mean hell, I had a crushon you when I first met ya!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 I know, Monica told me.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Did you have a crush on me, when you first met me?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yeah. Sure. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Can you people not see me?! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	  So, will you talk to him?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 I dont know Rach.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh, come on! Ill give you ten free Ralph Lauren shirts.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 One!  No ten! You said ten! You cant take that back!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Hey Joey, you wanted to talk to me?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 I dont know. You uh, you got something for me?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Oh, yeah, this is from Rachel.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Ten. Okay. Now Tag theres such a thing as to many women.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Really?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Yeah, for you!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	  Hey! There you are!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 There I am!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Are you okay?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Yeah, Joey said I uh, I needed to relax so he gave me anantihistamine.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 What?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Yeah, and then I fell asleep on the subway and went all the way toBrooklyn. Brooklyn is f-far!!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Chandler, what were you thinking?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 I dont know, but dont worry, dont worry, because Iknow how to take a picture now.  Okay, see? Look down , lookdown, look down 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Chandler?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	  Yeah! 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Hi.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Hi.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 So, how are things going with crazy? Has she cooked your rabbit yet?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Listen, you are hearing one side of the story, okayand F.Y.Ishe mustve shown Kyle over 30 paint samples before she painted that room! And hisresponse to each one was, "I dont give a tiny rats ass."
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah well, maybe she shouldve spent a little less time decoratingand a little more time in the bedroom.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Well, I dont think we are gonna have that problem, but maybethats just because I am not emotionally unavailable!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 You think hes emotionally unavailable?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 I think he can be.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Well, maybe he wouldnt be she didnt bring the office homeevery night!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Well, excuse her for knowing what she wants to do with her life!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah well, she certainly knew what she was doing New Years Eve1997.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	  I knew you were gonna throw that in my face!! Thatwas three years ago! She apologized and she apologized! What more do you want?!!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	  We want the last six years back!!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 So do we!! So do we!! Im sorry you had to see that.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Good morning Rachel.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hi!  Thanks, hey so uh whatd you do lastnight?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Went out with Joey.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh yeah? Another night of birdogging the chickas?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 No. We had a really good talk. I dont think Im gonna do thatbar scene anymore.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Wow! I did not see that coming.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Its just not really who I am. Y'know, Ive always been happierwhenWhy am I telling you this? You dont care about this stuff.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Oh no, yes I do! I do! I mean, come on go on, you were, you were sayingI am happier when uh, yknow?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 When Im in a relationship, I love having a girlfriend.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Really?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Someone I can spoil, yknow?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Sp-spoil?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Uh-huh! Let me ask you something?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Do you believe that there is one perfect person for everyone?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Well, I-Im startin too.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 And if that person is already in your life, you should do something aboutit right?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Yes! Hell yes!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 All right then, its settled.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 Im gettin back together with my ex-girlfriend.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Id love to!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Tag	 What?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Rachel	 Hello?!  Oh, yeah!  This is gonna be a while. Excuse me.  Yeah!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 My God!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh, Im sorry. Is that annoying? And speaking about being selfishin bed, hows Whitney?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Well maybe she wouldnt have to be selfish in bed if someone elseknew where everything was!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh he knows!  For the most part.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Kyle	 Oh hey! Good, youre both here.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 We kinda need to talk.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Both of you together?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Wh-whats up?
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 Well, I went over to Kyles last night to pick up a few things andwe got to reminiscing
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Kyle	 we talked through most of the night and we realized that the reasonwe were so angry at each other was because there are still feelings there. So
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Oh just say it Kyle!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Kyle	 Were gonna give it another try.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 What about her whining and her constant need for attention?!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 Im gonna work on that.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh right, because youre so capable of change.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	  Yknow, he hums when he pees!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 I do know.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 It makes him miss the bowl, but whatever.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Whitney	 Were so sorry. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Thats all right, we-we dont need you. In fact, hey Imover it already.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Yeah, and yknow what? I dont give a tiny rats ass.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Kyle	 Yeah, were gonna go. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	  Im sorry. Ugh, Pheebs, you were, you were right abouther. Yknow, she did try to use sex as a weapon! Yeah, I hurt my back alittle.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Oh. Yknow, he hums while he does other stuff to.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Yeah, were better off without them.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 And yknow, even if they break up again, youd better not lethim in your sad mens club!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Ross	 Divorced mens club.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Potato, Potaato. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Hey guys check it out! My mom sent me the paper!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 Ooh, lets see it!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Ahhh.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Okay. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Oh yeah, that looks good.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Phoebe	 You guys make a very attractive couple. 
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Yeah, we look great together.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Yeah, we really do!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Okay.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Monica	 Wow! Imagine what our kids would look like!
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Yknow, we dont have to imagine.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Chandler	 Im marrying her.
07	05	0705	The One With The Engagement Picture	Joey	 Well just see.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Okay, the reason why I asked you guys out to brunch today is because Ihave been doing some thinking about who should be my maid of honor.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Oh my God! This is it!   I reallyhope its you!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 I hope its you.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Me too!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 First of all um, I love you both so much and youre both soimportant to me
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla!! Who is it?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Well umm, I was thinking that maybe we could come up with a system wherewe trade of being maid of honor for each other. Like hypothetically, if Phoebe weremine
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Yes!!! Oh!!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Hypothetically!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Still.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 If Phoebe were my maid of honor
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Uh-hmm.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Rachel would be Phoebes, I would be Rachels, that way we allget to do it once and no one would get upset.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah thats actually a pretty good idea.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Yeah, Ill do that. So who gets to be yours?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	  Well thats the best part. Umm, you guys get todecide!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Wh-why is that the best part?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Because then I dont have to!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Well of course we will help you decide! We will do anything wecan to help you! Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing , my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Im really not deciding!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Fine!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Woman	 Excuse me, I-I couldnt help overhearing, youre marrying ChandlerBing?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Yeah thats right.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Woman	  Huh, good luck!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Aww, and good luck to you too!  What a nice lady!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Die Hard still great!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yep. Hey, what do you say we make it a double feature?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Whatd you rent?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Die Hard 2.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	  Joey, this is Die Hard 1 again.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Oh, well we watch it a second time and its Die Hard 2!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Joey, we just saw it!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 And?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 And itll be cool to see it again! Yeah!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey, Ross	 Die Hard!!!!!!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Dude, you didnt say Die Hard. Is everything okay?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Yeah, I just got uh, got plans.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Well, John McLane had plans!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 No, see the thing is I want to get out of here before Joey gets allworked up and starts calling everybody bitch.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 What are you talking about? Bitch.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Hey Rachel?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Umm, when I get married will you be my maid of honor?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Really?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Oh my God Phoebe! I mean Im justWait a minute. If Imyour maid of honor that means you are Monicas.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh! Well, if thats what you want
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Ohh! No way Phoebe! I want to be Monicas!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 But why does it even matter?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Why does it matter so much to you?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Because this one is now! And-and its two of our bestfriends! Who knows what youre gonna marry!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 What-what if I marry RossOr Joey?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	  You wouldnt! Okay look, Rachel I know you really want todo this, but I-Ive never been maid of honor to anyone before! And I know youvedone it at least twice!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah but Phoebe
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 And no, oh please, oh please let me finish.  Oh Iguess that was it.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. Itssince youve never done it before youcan be Monicas made of honor.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh, thank you so much!  Okay.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Im gonna marry someone good yknow.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh I know.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Better than Chandler. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 What happened?!!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Well, I dont know!!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 We fell asleep! That is all.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yeah. Yep. Yeah. All right, well uh, Id better go.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 I think that would be best.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yeah. All right, Ill talk to you later.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Okay. But not about this!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 No! Never! Never!  Bye.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 No touch! No touch!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Yeah hey, a weird thing happened today whey I was at brunch. This womanoverheard that I was marrying you and-and then sheshe wished me good luck.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Thats sweet.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 No, its more like a  good luck.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 So uh, what did this woman look like?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 She was like 30, dark hair, attractive.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Well, is there any chance you were looking into a bright, shiny thingcalled a mirror?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Come on, was it somebody maybe you dated in college?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 No, no I only dated two girls in college, both blonde, both notattractive  Hold on one second; let me check this out. (Hegets up and grabs a photo album.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 What are you doing?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Well, lets see  Okay uh, isthat her? 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Oh my God yes! Who is she?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Julie Grath, my camp girlfriend.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Did you break up with her?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	  No, were still together. Yeah we went out for twosummers, and then I broke up with her.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Why?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Well, cause she came back the third summer and shed gottenreally fa-aa-aw-ow
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Fat?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 I did not say fat! I said, "Fa-aa-aw-ow"
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 You broke up with a girl because she was fat?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Yeah. Yeah, but it was a really, really long time ago! Does she stillfeel bad?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Well, apparently she does.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Well, you know what they say, elephants never forget.  Seriously, good luck marrying me.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Hey! Whats going on?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Phoebe is gonna be Monicas maid of honor!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Hey! Well I hope it goes better than the last time you did it for thatgirl downstairs, remember? 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	  You have been maid of honor before?!!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 See? This is exactly why you shouldnt lie!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 All right thats it! I am maid of honor!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Na-uh, I am!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 How come you are?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Because I cared enough to lie!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey-hey, I can help you decide who should do it! Yeah, we couldhave like uh, like an audition and see how youd handle maid of honor typesituations.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 What are you talking about?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Like when I want a job, I go to an audition and if Im the best ofthe people they see, they give me the part.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Okay, so after this audition, who decides who gets it?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Oh uh, me and Ross can be the judges.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	  Well, its better than us deciding.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Oh, come on! This is crazy! Cant we just flip a coin?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 No! Coins hate me!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Okay. Okay fine, yknow what? We will let Ross and Joey decide.  Hiiiii, Ross! Sweetie.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Hey there, you handsome thing. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Wow, this cologne really is every bit as good as Georgio. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Hi.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Just uh, brought back your videos.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Uh hey look uh Ross, look I think we need to talk about before.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 No! No we dont!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yes we do! Now look, that was the best nap I ever had!! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 I I dont know what you are talking about.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Come on! Admit it! That was the best nap you ever had!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Ive had better.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Okay! When?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 All right! All right! It was the best nap ever!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Uh-huh!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Ive said it! Okay?! But its over Joey!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 I want to do it again.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 We cant do it again.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Why not?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Because its weird!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Fine! Do you want something to drink?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Sure, what do you got?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Warm milk and Excedrin P.M. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Chandler!  Chandler! I just figured out who youare!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Can you figure out what Im doing?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Youre Lewis Posin.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Who?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Lewis Posin! He was my best friend in fifth grade, and-and then one dayI asked him to be my boyfriend and he said no. Do you know why?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Because you kept talking to him while he was trying to go to thebathroom?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 No! But because he thought I was to faaaaa.  And every time I think about it, it makes me feel as bad asI did in fifth grade! Yknow, I-I really think that you should apologize to Julie.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 What? Are you kidding? That was like 16 years ago.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 No, I know. But yknow what? It would make me feel better if Lewisapologized to me.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Okay, I will do it. But I have to warn you; this may make me a betterperson and that is not the man you feel in love with!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Okay, all right, this is how its going to work. Were gonnagive you hypothetical maid of honor situations and you will be scored on a scale of 1 to10, 1 being the highest.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 No, 10 is the highest.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Why is 10 the highest?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Because its the highest.  Okay, Rachelyoure up first.  Situation No. 1: Youre withMonica, the wedding is about to start when Monica gets cold feet. Go! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	  I dont want to marry Chandler!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Okay, uh
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Ive got cold feet.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 its gonna be okay!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 No, one man for the rest of my life? I dont know if I can do it!This means Ill never get to sleep with Joey!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Look Monica, getting cold feet is very common. Yknow,its-its just because of all the anticipation and you just have to rememberthat you love Chandler. And also, I ran out on a wedding. You dont get to keep thegifts.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	  Very good! Drawing on your own experience, Ilike that!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Thanks!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Yes, very nice Rachel.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Thank you judges.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Ugh, what a kiss ass.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Oh!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Okay, Phoebe
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Yes! Your honor?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Were now in the ceremony, Monica is about to say, "I do"when her drunk uncle starts yelling. What do you do? Go!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	  When Monica was a little girl, I rememberthatOoh!! Ow! Very good!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yes! Excellent! Perfect score!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Wait a minute! She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Hey! Do you want do you want a little taste of Pheebs?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 It is time for you to give your maid of honor speech.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Ohh, wait a minute, we havent pre
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Go!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Okay! Okay! Umm, Websters Dictionary defines marriageas  Okay!! Forget that! That sucks!! Okay, never mind!Forget it! Umm, umm, okay, uh I met, I-I met, I met Monica when we were just acouple of six year olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although heseemed like a six year old.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross, Joey	 Oh! Thats nice.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Thank you. Thank you very much. Umm, Ive known them separately andIve known them together and-and to know them as a couple is to know that you aretruly in the presence of love. So I would like to raise my glass  to Monica and Chandler and the beautiful adventure they are about to embark upontogether. I can think of no two people better prepared for the journey.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Wow.  Good speech.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Yeah, it really was!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Aw, thanks!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Okay Phoebe, I guess youre next  although I reallydont see the point.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yeah.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Okay, I cant believe that Monica and Chandler are getting married.I remember talking about this day with Rachel while we were showering together, naked.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 And shes back in the game.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	  Julie hi! Chandler Bing, I, I guess you rememberme.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Julie	 Hello Skidmark.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	  Its a nickname, Ill explain later.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Its pretty clear.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Ah, uh, I owe you a long overdue apology. I never should have brokenup with you because you were overweight.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Julie	 Thats why you broke up with me?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 You-you-you didnt know that.  Well, Iguess my work here is done!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 All right, well first of all I would like to say that you both performedvery well. Okay? You should be proud of yourselves. And-and I would also like to say thatin this competition there are no losers. Well, except for RachelDamnit!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Really?! I won!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 What?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Im sorry Rach, it was, it was really close.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Well then I demand a recount! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Actually, it wasnt that close.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 No! Yknow what? No! No! You thing was so stupid anyway, this wasridiculousWere gonna flip a coin!  All right?!  Heads! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 The coins have finally forgiven me!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Well yknow what? I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her,her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	  Rach, its gonna be okay! You guys are the best!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Boy I tell ya, that judging stuff took a lot out of me.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Yeah?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Yeah! I was thinking about maybe going upstairs and taking a little nap onmy couch.  
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 Why-why would I care about that?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 No reason, Im just saying that uh Thats where Illbe. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 As bad as that went I actually enjoyed myself. I think that Imgoing to apologize for all of the stupid things I do.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Why dont you just stop doing stupid things? Then you wouldnthave to apologize.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 I would really love it if could do both.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 All right, II have to ask.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 What?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Are you gonna break up with me if I get fat again?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 What?!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Well, you broke up with Julie Grath! How much weight could she havegained?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 A hundred and forty-five pounds.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 In one year?! My God what did she eat? Her-her family! Thats notthe point.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Look I know it was a stupid reason to break up with somebody, but Iwas 15!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Well Thats not the only time this was an issue. You rememberwhen umm, you spent Thanksgiving with us? You called me fat.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Okay. Okay, now wait a minute that was totally different.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 How?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 You were not supposed to hear that! I said that behind you back!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 What if I have babies, okay? I mean Im gonna look different.Im okay with that, but Im not sure that you are!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Look you have to realize I dont think of you as a thin,beautiful woman.  See this is one of things that I can apologizefor later! Look, what I mean is youre Monica! Okay? And I am in love with Monica. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Keep going.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 So you can balloon up or you can shrink down and I will still loveyou.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 Even if I shrink down to two inches tall?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Id carry you around in my pocket.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	 I love you. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Chandler	 Skidmarks still got a way with the ladies.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Hi Pheebs.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Hi!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Hi! I just want to apologize. Im really sorry I was a baby.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Thats ridiculous Rachel, we were all babies once.  Oh, you mean today.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah. Yeah, and yknow you-you deserve to win. And-and yknowI was thinking about it, if-if youre Monicas maid of honor that means I get tobe yours.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh yeah!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah! Oh, umm when-when Monica and Chandler got engaged I startedputting some stuff together, yknow just in case
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Oh thats so sweet thanks.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Here is a book of poetry that I know Monica loves. And-and ohh God thisis funny, look, this is a picture of one Halloween where she dressed up as a bride.  And look, she made me carry her train, which was weird because I was WonderWoman. Oh and heres a little purse that I found. Yknow I just thought that maybe they could hold the rings in there.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Ohh.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 And umm, vintage handkerchiefs yknow cause, people cry atweddings.  Im just gonna grab a couple of these.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 This stuff is great!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Oh, I forgot this was in here. Umm, this was the uh garter that I wassaving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monicas something borrowed and itsblue.  Yeah
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Yknow Rach, I think that, I think you should be Monicas madeof honor.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 You do? Why?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Because I think it means more to you.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 But Pheebs, yknow you earned it.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Its fine. I mean, this is something that youve been thinking aboutsince you were what, 14? 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 No, I was ten. I just developed early.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	  Man alive!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	  Hey, whats going on?
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Hey!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Phoebe	 Well, we just decided that Rachel is gonna be your maid of honor.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Monica	  Ohh, wow! Thats great!  Oh wow! Wereally have to start planning! I have, I have a lot of really specific ideas! We shouldprobably get together like four times per week. You can come over to my place; wellget together before work! What do you say, 6:30, my place? Im so excited! 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Rachel	 Yeah okay, you laugh now, but shes gonna be yours. 
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	 Great nap.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	 It really was.
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Joey	  Dude! What the hell are you doing?! God!
07	06	0706	The One With The Nap Partners	Ross	  Excuse me. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Morning!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Hi! Oh, how was your date last night?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Pretty good.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Oh good.  Ahhh! My God, sorry! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Okay, really good. Anyway I gotta go; Im late for work.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 What-what?! Youre gonna leave this person with me?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 YeahHey, dont worry, shes a terrific girl. And heylisten, could you do me a favor? When she comes out could you just mention that Imnot looking for a serious relationship; thatd be great.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Why?! What?! Are you kidding?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Just casually slip it in, yknow lay the groundwork. Tell her uh,Im a lonerNo! An outlaw! Tell her she doesnt want to get mixed up withthe likes of me.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yknow what? Thats a lot to remember, cant I just tellher youre a pig?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey, Im gonna call her later! Honest! Oh come on, Chandler used todo it! Hed even make the girl pancakes! Plus, hed make extras and leaveem for me.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Well forget it, Im not telling that girl anything. That is not myresponsibility.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Fine!  Now, whered we land on those pancakes? 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	JoeyS Date	 Hi!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Hi.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	JoeyS Date	 Sorry about that, but I couldnt get that lock to work onthe door.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah, Joey kinda disabled it when I moved in.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	JoeyS Date	 You must be Rachel, Im Erin.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Hi.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Hi. I dont mean this to sound like high school, but did he sayanything about me?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	  Would you like some pancakes?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Come on! Why are we here?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Okay, okay take a guess.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 The hot chicks?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Okay, okay, I was typing names into the library computer earlier,yknow-yknow for fun, and I typed mine in and guess what came up? My doctoraldissertation! Its here! Yeah, its right-its right down here! In thebiggest library in the university! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Wow thats actually pretty cool.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	  Oh umm, theres also a book here by a woman namedWendy Bagina.  What is that?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Sounds like two people are really enjoying the Dewey decimal system.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Female Student	  Im so sorry!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Male Student	 Sorry!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 You didnt bring me here to do that, did you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 She sent the chicken back again?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	The Waitress	 She says its to dry now and she wants to come back here andexplain to you exactly how she wants it.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well fine! I want to meet this chicken expert! Send the Colonel in!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	The Colonel	 OHMYGAWD!!!! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	  Lucky bastard!  Janice.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 How are you Ms. Hot Shot chef with the big fancy restaurant with thebest chicken ever! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Im fine.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	  Ohh! What is that on yourfinger?! Im blind!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Oh Uh
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 So, whos the lucky guy?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 OHMYGAWD! I am so sorry sweetie, are you okay? Youdidnt tell her we were getting married, did you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well, she saw the ring.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Did she freak out?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again so were mostpeople.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Right.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well, she actually has a boyfriend yknow herself, named Clark. Uh,she also kinda invited herself to our wedding. Clark too.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	  You said no right?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Huh?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 You said no right?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well, she corned me! She asked if the wedding was in town! I mean, whatwas I supposed to do?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Lie!!! How hard is that?! The checks in the mail! Oh your babyis so cute! I cant wait to read your book Ross!!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Come on! So she comes to the wedding! I mean it wont be so bad.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 What do you think shes just gonna sit there quietly? Youdont think shes gonna want to make a toast? You dont think shesgonna want to grab the microphone and sing Part-time Lover?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Oh my God, shes not gonna like the chicken that night either isshe?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Yknow what? Its gonna be okay. Yknow what?Shes probably not gonna even want to come.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Really?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 No! That was a lie! See how easy that was?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 So-so you wouldve just lied?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Yes!!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Would it really have been that easy?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Yes!!!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Good, so do it Saturday night because were going to dinner withher and Clark.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey! Whats up?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe, Rachel	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey-hey, whos your friend?  Hey!!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Hey Joey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Erin! Still here!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah, we ended up spending the day together and had such a great time!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Why wouldnt ya? Erin is great! Then-then theres you guys.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Ohh, listen. Ive got to get going. Today was great, thanks!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 I know!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Okay!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Bye Joey.  Last night was fun.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Yeah. Ill uh, Ill call ya.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Oh and Ill call ya too!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Or Ill call you!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 And call me!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Okay, good to see you again.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Bye.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Bye-bye.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Bye!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 So, system kinda broke down huh?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Oh Joey, Im sorry I just couldnt tell her all those thingsyou wanted me to tell her. And yknow we got to talking and I
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 We want you to marry her!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 What?!!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 She is so amazing! You have no idea.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 No idea? Who do you think brought her here?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Cupid.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Joey, shes so cool. She speaks four languages.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Man, do you know what guys want!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Look Joey, come on shes so perfect for you! I mean shessweet, she-she likes baseball, and she-she had two beers at lunch.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 My beers?! Look you guys, shes a very nice girl. Okay? We had a goodtime, but I justI dont see it going anywhere.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Yeah, but you always say that.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe if you gave this girl a chance it would go somewhere.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Look Im sorry you guys, I-I just dont think so.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Whatever.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Fine. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey, dont start judging me!  Huh? Youre the onewhos in love with her assistant!  Huh? And you, youre the onehaving the affair with the guy who keeps the pigeons on the roof!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Phoebe!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Secret affair!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 People are doing it in front of my book!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Im sorry?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 My doctoral dissertation is in the library at school, I went to see it,and there were students makin babies right in the middle of the Paleontologysection!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Oh my God! Did you get to see anything good?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Let me ask you something, at your school was there a like uh a place oncampus where students went to uh, fool around.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah, there was. It wasthere the corner of the library where-whereall these dusty books that nobody ever readYes, there was.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Great! Because people kept showing up, I think its like uh-a thing!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Now hold on a second, fifth floor against that back wall?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Oh for cryin out loud! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 All right, so we should go catch our movie.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Well now whats the rush?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 I like to see the previews.  The candy.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	  Oh. Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Well look whos here!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Joey.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Erin.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Hey Rachel.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Hi! Well, we were just about to take off and see a movie. Oh no!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Whats wrong?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Oh Phoebe, we forgot that party we have to go to.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Oh no.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  What party?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe, Rachel	 A birthday party.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Whos birthday party?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe, Rachel	 Allisons birthday party.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Oh, and how is Allison?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe, Rachel	 32. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	  Wait a minute! Why dont you guys dosomething?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Yeah, look how that worked out.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Excuse me. Hi, Im a professor here. Do you know the Paleontologysection, fifth floor, stack 437?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	The Librarian	 Well, yes! Just give me five minutes, I just have to find someoneto cover my shift.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 No! No!! No! Can I speak to someone in charge please?! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	The Head Librarian	 How can I help you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Hi, I was wondering if it is possible to increase security in thePaleontology section? See I-I wrote a book up there and instead of reading it peopleare-are-are well, rolling around in front of it.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	The Head Librarian	 We are aware of the problem you are referring too.  But as far as increasing security, Im afraid thelibrary is very understaffed. I, I cant help you.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Well, fine. Fine! If-if Im the only person with any appreciation ofthe sanctity of the written word, Ill go up there and defend it myself!  And dont you follow me!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 How did it go with Erin?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Oh, unbelievable! We had the best time!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Yay!! Oh so, youre not, youre not mad at us anymore?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 No! No! No! You guys were totally right! This is so much better than thefirst time we went out. Yknow? That was so awkward, we were really nervous.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Didnt you sleep together?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Yeah that really calms me down. And! We have so much in common! She lovessandwiches, sports, although she is a Met fan, not much of an issue now but if were everto have kids, well thats a
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	  Oh my God! Listen to you talkin about having kids. Oh myJoey.  Oh, please dont get married before I do.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Okay.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Oh. Oh I just cannot believe Clark stood me up!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 He might still show up.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Oh, what are you, stupid? Its been three hours.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Is that all?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 I should just go on to happier things, okay? Umm, why dont youtell about your lovely wedding?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Well actually uh, there was something we wanted to tell you about thewedding. Um, its going to be a small ceremony. Uh, tiny! Were not even surewhy were having it.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Its actually going to be just family.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Ohwaityou two think of me as family?! Oh, I have to ask yousomething now and be honest; do you want me to sing Careless Whisper or Lady InRed?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 How can you say that?! The Mets have no closer!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 What about Benitez?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 What about Game 1 of the Series?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 What about shut up?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 You shut up!  I love arguing with her. Ill be right back. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Okay. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 So hows it goin with Joey?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Uh, okay.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Okay? Wait okay, tell-tell me that you like him, please? I mean tell methat you like him.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Look, hes a really great guy and I know that you really wantthis to work out, but I just dont see this having a future.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 But you said that you liked him! I mean what happened?! Did ya justchange your mind?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Kinda.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Then change it back!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Im sorry I Its just theres no real spark.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 No spark? Didnt you sleep together?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Yeah.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Ugh, tramp!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Does Joey have any idea?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 I really dont think he does. And yknow what? Maybe you guyscould help clue him in. Yknow, tell him Im-Im not interested in aserious relationship or something.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Yeah, you mean like that youre kind of a loner.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Yeah! That would be great!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Yeah, and maybe that youre a real 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Im sorry?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Oh well, I guess Italian isnt one of the four languages you speak.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Hey! You wanna go?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Yeah, lets go.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Okay. See you guys later.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Erin	 Bye guys.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah, see ya.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Hey, thank you so much. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Wow. Well, I guess it was Cupid who brought her here.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 No, just a regular old flying dwarf.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Yes? Yes?! How can I help you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Guy	 Yeah, we werewe were just looking around.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Oh-oh, youre-youre fellow scholars. What exactly were youlooking for, hmm? Perhaps,  perhaps Dr. ChesterStocks musings on the Smiledon Californicus?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Guy	 Uhh.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Ah AhGet out of here!  Uh, meeting someone? Or-or are you just here to brush up on Marions viewson evolution?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Woman	 Uh, actually I find Marions views far to progressionist.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 I find Marions views far to progressionist.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Woman	 Im sorry, who are you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Im a professor here uh, RossGeller.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Woman	 Ross Geller, why do I know that name? Its uhWait!  Did you write this?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Yes! Youre the person who checked out my book?!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Woman	 Yknow, you look nothing like I wouldve thought.Youreyoure so young.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 Well I uh, I skipped forth grade.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	 I am veryvery sorry.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Hi!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 So how was, how was your date?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Oh, it was great! I mean we walked all around the village. We went to thisice cream place, split a milkshake, 70/30 but still And guess what, Imthinking about taking her upstate to one of those bed and breakfasts.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Oh really? She said she wants to go away with you?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no! Its a surprise, but its gonna be trickythought because she said she was gonna be pretty busy at work for a while.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe, Rachel	 Oh no, yeah.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Jo-Joey, look honey we-we need to talk okay? Umm, I kinda got thefeeling from her today that uh, shes not lookin for a serious relationship.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Where are you gettin this?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Well, she told me. She said shes kinda a loner.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Oh. Oh.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Joey
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 No hey Rach, its cool okay? Yknow Im a loner too!  Right?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Phoebe	 Hey Joey, yknow what? You are way to good for her.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Yeah and honey I promise next time that I will just say good-bye andtell em youre not looking for a relationship.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 No! No. Dont do that, just next time make sure she really likes me.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Well that too.  Joey?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	 Yeah?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Rachel	 Do you want some pancakes?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Joey	  Finally!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 What are we gonna do?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 I say we go with Careless Whisper.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Chandler?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	  Did she see us yet? Did she see us?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Janice, what umm, what are you doing here?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Well umm, I thought I was going to go back to my apartment but then Ijust felt I couldnt really be alone tonight.  I waswondering if I could maybe stay here with you, just I really feel that I need to be withfamily.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	  Our kids are gonna call her Aunt Janice arent they?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Please, its because otherwise I really dont know what Imight do.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Arent you just a tinsy bit curious?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	  Do you have any tissues?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Yeah, in-in-in the bathroom.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Okay! 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Well justwell just let her stay.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 No-no-no-no, if we let her stay, she will stay forever!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Kinda like your Barca lounger.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Is that what youre thinking about right now?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 I never stop thinking about it.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Hey you guys, umm do either one of you want to get in there before Itake my bath.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Janice, Im sorry but umm, you cant stay here tonight.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Why not?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Honestly? Our apartment is a hotbed for electromagnetic activity. NowMonica and I have been immunized, but sadly you have not.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Okay, Im going to need a comforter, but did you have ahypoallergenic one because otherwise I get very nasal.  Do youhave a cat? Cause its already happening.  Do you hearthat? 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Oh my God! Oh my God! You have to go!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Why?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Because Chandler still has feelings for you!
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 He does?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Say again?
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 Thats right. Thats right. And that is why you cantstay here tonight. And probably why you shouldnt come to the wedding.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 Feelings, such strong feelings.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Monica	 I mean, I realize that his feelings may never completely go away, but youcan.
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Janice	 Ohmy Gawd, I-I understand. I-I am so sorry, Ill go.  Good-bye Monica , I wish you a lifetime of happiness with him.Chandler,  you call me when this goes in the pooper. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Ross	  Dont sweat it, Ive got this section covered.Yeah, in fact Ive got this little baby  to shine inpeoples eyeOkay, see you later. 
07	07	0707	The One With Ross's Library Book	Chandler	 I just wanted to show Monica your book. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	  Hey everybody! Happy Thanksgiving! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 No, no, no. No-no-no. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey, Rachel, Phoebe	 Shhhh! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 What, are we keeping Thanksgiving a secret this year? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 No, we're playing this game I learned at work. You have to name allthe states in six minutes. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 What? That's like insanely easy! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Now, that's a lot harder than it sounds. You always forget at leastone, or in some cases... fourteen . 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 It's a stupid game and I wasn't playing against other people, sotechnically I didn't lose. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 What? You forgot fourteen states? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Nobody cares about the Dakotas. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Oh, okay, time's up! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 All right, I got 48. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Oh that's not bad, Pheebs? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Oh, I got tired of naming states. So I decided to list the types ofcelery, and I have one: regular celery. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Okay, so Rachel's got 48 and Phoebe has the lead invegetables,Joey? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Say hello to the new champ of Chandler's dumb states game. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Wow, how many have you got? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Fifty-six! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Hey! How is New England not a state? Huh? They have a sports-team! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Does South Oregon have a sports-team? There you go. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  How come we have one extra place setting? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 'Cause you invited your assistant. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh, right. Sorry. But Tag's not coming; his girlfriend came into town,so he's spending Thanksgiving with her. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Oh! Why didn't you tell me? I made him his own individual sweet potatostuffed pumpkin. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Well, I was going to, but then I figured, you know... you're food is sodelicious and perfect, you can never have too many of those pumpkin things. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Now you think I wouldn't enjoy that, because it is so fake,  butI still do.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Regular Celery!  Oh, I already havethat.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Done! With time a-to-spare. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Oooh that may be a New World's record  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 You know, I hate to lecture you guys, but it's kinda disgraceful, that agroup of well-educated adults and Joey can't name all the states. Did you ever see a map,or one of those round, colorful things called "a globe?" Hmm? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Uh, Magellan? You got 46 states.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 What? That's impossible. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 46. Wow! Who's well educated now, Mr. I-forgot-ten-states? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 All right, I'm out of oven space. I'm gonna turn on Joey's. Please,watch him! Do not let Joey eat any of the food! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 I am only one man!  Okay Ross, time is up! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 No, just give me another minute. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Look Ross, if you don't know them by now, you will never know them,okay? That is the beauty of this game. It makes you want to kill yourself. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 This-this is crazy! I can do this! All right, uhh, I bet I can get all 50before dinner. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Okay, but if you can'tno dinner! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 You're on! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  All right. Don't look at my list, Ross, 'cause there's a lot onthere that you don't have. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	  Hey, did you guys know, that your ovendoesn't work? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 But the drawer full of take-out menus is okay, right? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Ross, I'm gonna use yours, okay? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Pshhshhh!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Chandler? Can you give me a hand?  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Sure, and Joey; do not let Ross look at any of the maps or the globein your apartment. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Don't worry, Chandler, it's not a globe of the United States. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Hey you guys I'm gonna go out and take a walk. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Phoebe, why is your bag moving? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Oh, it's not! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Seriously, it's moving! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 What the hell is in there? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 It's just my knitting that's all!  Yes! I knit this. I'm very good. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Rosss apartment is nice! How come we don't hang out here moreoften? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 I don't know. Maybe it's because it smells a little weird. It's likeold pumpkins or something. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 That's my pie! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Which smells delicious! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Uh-oh! Uh-oh! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 What? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 We left Joey alone with the food!  Yep! Yep, I knew it! There he is... feeding stuffing to a dog! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  Hi Geller-Bing residence. How can I help?
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Phoebe, why is there a dog in our apartment? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, who's this? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Phoebe, there's a dog sitting on my couch! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Tell her, I'm allergic, and I will sue! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 No, there's no dog here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Yes there is! He's black and white and shaggy and  he's sitting next to Rachel and licking Rachel's hand. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Oh my god! Where are you? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 I'll be right there! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  They'rehere already? How are they doing this? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  Hi Tag! What are you doing here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 I, uh, wanted to see if your offer to spend Thanksgiving with you is stillgood. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Well, sure! Come in!  Well, what-what happened to yourgirlfriend? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 We kinda broke up this morning. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Yeah, so she went back to Ohio.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Ohio!! Thank you! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Huh! Where is the dog?!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 What dog? There-there's no dog here. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Yeah that dog left! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	  Phoebe! Phoebe, open up! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 There's no dog in here. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Phoebe, we can hear the dog barking! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 No that's just me coughing!  Oh, good, there you are! Listen, um, Ihave a dog in my room. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 What is it doing here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Well, I'm watching it for some friends who went out of town. Wait.  Hello, my name is Clunkers.May I please stay with you nice people?
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Oooh, I wish she could stay here, but Chandler is allergic! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Extremely allergic, okay? If I'm anywhere near a dog for more than 5minutes, my throat will just close up! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 That's odd, 'cause this dog's been living here for the past 3 days 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  Really? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Chandler, if that dog's been here that long, and you haven't had areaction, maybe you're not allergic to this dog? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Well, it still has to go, right?
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica, Phoebe	 Why? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Okay, it's um
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  Don't do it! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Don't do what? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  I have to! Okay? It's time!  Okay, I hate dogs. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	All	 What? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Are you crazy? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Are you out of your mind?
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Why? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Told ya. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 They are needy, they are jumpy, and you can't tell what they arethinking, and that scares me a little bit. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Right, they are scary.  Ahh, she just ate a treatout of my hand!!!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Wait a minute. Do you not like all dogs? I mean, not even puppies? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  Is there a puppy here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 You don't like puppies? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  Okay, you are new!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Look, Chandler, I told you, never tell anyone about this dog thing. It'slike Ross not likin ice cream. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 You don't like ice cream? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 It's too cold. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Okay, it's just that dogs make me a little uncomfortable. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	  It hurts my teeth.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 And I don't wanna say this, I don't you guys to hate me, but uh, Idon't think, I can be around that dog anymore. Okay, so either the dog goes, or I go.  Oh my god!!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 How can I not get this? I'm a college professor; I got 1450 on my S.A.T.s.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 1250.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Damn, I forgot you were here. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 All right. We're gonna take Clunkers to Rosss. We'll be back in aminute. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh, wait before you guys go, can I just ask you a question? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Yeah. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 When a guy breaks up with his girlfriend, what is an appropriate amountof time to wait before you make a move? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Oh, I'd say about a month. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Really? I'd say 3 to 4. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Half hour. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Interesting. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 When it's your assistant, I would say never. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 All right, Rach, the big question is, does he like you? All right? Becauseif he doesn't like you, this is all a moo-point. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Huh. A moo-point? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Yeah, it's like a cow's opinion. It just doesn't matter. It's moo. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  Have I been living with him for too long, or didthat all just make sense?
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Please, don't listen to Joey, okay. Would you look at him? He-hesobviously depressed. He's away from his family; he's spending Thanksgiving with strangers.  What he needs right now is for you to be his friend. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 You're right, I'm sorry. Thank you. Okay, that's what I'm gonna do. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Fine! Take their advice. No one ever listens to me. When the package isthis pretty, no one cares what's inside. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Hey! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Hey. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 How are you holding up? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Not bad. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Yeah? I'm sorry about your girlfriend. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Thanks. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 So were you guys together a long time? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 A year. On and off. I kinda thought we'd end up together. I don't anymore. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Now that she broke up with you? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Yeah. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Yeah. Hmmmm. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 It's weird. I always used to assume, that I would meet someone and fall inlove and be happy and all that was just a given. But lately it's like what if it's not. Doyou ever have that feeling? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 NoYeah, all the time, constantly. It's terrifying. But you knowthat I figure itit has to work out. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Why? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Because, uhit has to. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 You have all the answers, don't you? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Yeah, I know, I do. I really do. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Hey, thanks for talking to me. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Well, what is a boss for? Hug it out!  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  All right, he likes you back! Huh? Told ya, youshould go for it! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 What? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  Street noise drowned any of that out?  No, all right, I see you later, okay...  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 What did Joey say? I like you back? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Uh, yeah, well, see, he Joey knows, that I'm-I'm very insecureabout my back and, andyou're hugging me, so obviously you are not repulsed by it,yeah!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Wait-wait a minute; that doesn't make any sense. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 No?  All right, here's the truth um, Joey said whathe said, because um, I'm attracted to you. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Wow.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Yeah, I admit it. I have a crush on you, and uh, and, and I know that'scrazy because we work together, and-and nothing could ever happen, and the last thing Iwant to do is-is to freak you out or make you feel uncomfortable. Which is why it would bereally great if you said something right about now. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	  Oh my god! Those guys are stealing my car!  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 What? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Right there! That's my car!  Hey!! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Okay, that's gonna take them a minute. Do you have anything else youwanna get off your chest? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 I can't believe this!  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  Wait, we still have time to talk andtheyre-they're not even in the car yet!  Ohlook, there they go, okay.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Okay Phoebe, we should probably go back now. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  Please don't leave me, I'll be lonely. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Stop it. Stop! Okay let's go. We can be strong.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Oh my god! Did you hear that? She said Monica!  Oooh, I can't leave her! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 You know if you want, we can sneak the dog back in and Chandler wouldn'teven know. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 That's not gonna work. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 I've had that dog there for three days and Chandler had no idea. He'snot so smart. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Hey! I didn't know either. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Yeah, but you kinda knew that something was going on, didn't you? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Yeah, I knew. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Where's Chandler? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  Here I am. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Wash your hands!!!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 How did youknow?  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Hey! What's she doing back here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Relax, Ross. She's not made of ice cream! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Hey look, Phoebe. I, uh, I laid out the states geographically... 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  No, no, we don't really have time for this right now.Okay, we have to keep Chandler away from my bedroom. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Yeah, but, but look what I'm... 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 See, this is exactly what we do not have time for.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  Where's Monica? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Um, in Phoebe's room. You can't go in there. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Why not? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Monica's crying. She's very upset about this whole Clunkers thing. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Well, I, I should go in there. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 No. No, no. She doesn't want to see you right now. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Why not? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Because you sent away the dog!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 This is ridiculous.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Oh, is it? Is it? Look, when Monica and I were kids, we had a dognamed Rover. And, uh, one day, my dad decides, he doesn't like dogs. So Monica and herfriendPhyllistake away the dog. And that was the last time we ever saw him.Don't you see? This is just like that. Only with a few details changed. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  Okay, I'm in my sweat pants. Bring on the food!  What's the matter? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Monica's all upset, because I sent Clunkers away. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 So? Bring the dog back, you're a hero. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Yeah, I can be a hero, I could do that. I could, I could do... I,w-w-what if, what if it attacks me? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Chandler, it's like a big gerbil.
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 And that doesn't scare you?  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Ross, you need some help? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 From you? Yes, please! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	  First of all, Utah? Dude, you can't just makestuff up!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 I hate America! When I finish this game, I swear I am moving. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Hey! Tag's still talking to the police. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Yeah, ohh! Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth?  Ihave a crush on you; I am attracted to you.  Gee, I-I know that Ifreaked him out 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 If you said it like that, you probably did, yeah. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  Hey, is Chandler here? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 No, no he went for a walk. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Okay, but you cannot tell him... but look whose back! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  Hi! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 Oh No-no-no-no-no-no-no! He went over to Ross' to bring the dog back here!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Oh no, the dog's not going to be there! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Joey	 You think? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 Hi, honey. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Please, please, please, don't be mad at me. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 What? Why, why would... 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	  Shh, wait and see. Maybe we will, maybe wewon't. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Okay, I went over to Ross' apartment to bring back Clunkers.Yknow, for you, and I left the door open and she must havegotten out and I looked everywhere, all over the apartment, including the roof,which FYI Ross, one of your neighbors, growing weed. I couldn't find him, and I am so, so,so, sorry. But I do know where we could all go ease the pain.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 We have good news, look whose back! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	  Hi! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Clunkers?! Oh my god! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Monica	 That's right, she came back all by herself. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 It's a Thanksgiving miracle! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	  It is so good to see you! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Phoebe	 Yeah, she came all the way back from Ross' building. Oh, the things shemust have seen! And then she climbed up the fire escape and she tapped on the window withher teeny little paw and then we ran to let her in I went to far, didn't I? When should I have stopped? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Okay, maybe this is so hard, because there aren't 50 states. Let me tellyou something, I have 49 states, and there are no more! I-I think, I should be ableto eat something. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 It's up to you. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh, hi! How are you doing? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 I'm okay. I gotta go down to the police station and look at mug shots. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Thanks for having me over, you guys. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Tag? Y-You're going?  Uh we didn't, uh we didn't getthe chance to talk. Uh, so, where did you say you're from again? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Colorado. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Ah, what good are you.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Look, um, I think we should talk about what happened on the terrace. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Okay. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Ah, I-I never should have said what I said. Ityknow what? Itjust doesn't matter how I feel. I mean we work together, so nothing could really everhappen between us, and what I would love is just to go to work on Monday, and-and nevertalk about this again, okay? Big day Monday lots to do. So, we're okay? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Um, I'm not. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Oh, god, I know it, that I freaked you out. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 No, you didn't. The only thing that freaked me out was you saying thatnothing could ever happen between us. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Really? 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Tag	 Yeah, so, please don't fire me for doing this.  
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Rachel	 Okay, well, that's one less thing we have to do on Monday. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	 Delaware!  Delaware!
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 All right. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	  I want my turkey now! 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 You got it.  You got Nevada twice. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Ross	  I know. 
07	08	0708	The One Where Chandler Doesn't Like Dogs	Chandler	 Yeah. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ben	  Im ready!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 You sure?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ben	 Uh-huh!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Okay, let me just straighten out your helmet there. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ben	  Thanks daddy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 No-no, one daddy, two mommies. All right, its all yours.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Okay. Okay.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Yes! Yes! Yes!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 His first big kids bike, this is so exciting!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Oh yeah, I remember mine! Ohh, it was my sixth birthday, my dad took meto the park, I got it, andit bent.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Yeah.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 I never had a bike of my own.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	  What?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Well, we didnt have a lot of money. But the girl across the streethad the best bike! It was pink and it had rainbow colored tassels hanging off thehandle grips, and-and-and a bell and this big, white wicker basket with thoseplastic daisies stuck on.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 That sounds like my first bike.  Mydad gave me his old one.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Ohh.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Did the girl ever let you ride it?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 No! But she gave me the box that it came in. It had a picture of thebike on the front.  So I would sit on it and my step-dadwould drag me around the backyard.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 That is so unfair!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Not really, I got to drag him around too! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Hey! What are you guys doing? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Hey.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Making holiday candy for the neighbors.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Im sorry, who?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Im gonna hang this basket on the door and when the neighbors walk by they can all take a piece.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 But we dont know the neighbors.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 I do. Theres uh, lets see, Guy With a Mustache, Smokes-A-LotLady, Some Kids Ive Seen, and A Red-haired Guy Who Does Not Like To Be Called Rusty.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 See? This is exactly why Im making this candy. We can learntheir names and get to know our neighbors.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Wouldnt it be easier if we just moved?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  Gooood morning!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Eh, somebodys in a good mood!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Well, why shouldnt I be? I have great friends! I have a wonderfuljob!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Where you can make out with your assistant.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Come on, its not a big deal! We stayed up all night coming up witha plan so that us dating will not be a problem.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Oh yeah, whats the plan?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  We We are notgoing to let it be a problem.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Wow! It took you all night to come up with that plan?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Well yknow, we did other stuff too. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Did you two
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Oh Monica come on, yknow I dont sleep with guys on the firstdate!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Matt Guire, Mark Lynn, Ben Wire
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Anymore!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Okay.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Hi. Tag, I have a conference call today is that correct?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Yes, at 4:00.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Okay, thank you. Thatll be all.   Wait! Wait!  Did you see that? That mail guy had no idea there was something going onbetween us. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Id better get back to my desk.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Okay, you hard worker! Ill remember to put that in yourevaluation.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 My what?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Well, youve been here for two months now and your boss is requiredto hand in a performance evaluation. But yknow, there is one thing that I have yetto evaluate.  
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Are you serious?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 No, Ive just always wanted to do that. Can you help me clean thisup?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 The basket is totally empty! My God, the neighbors ate all the candy!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Well, either that or uh
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Joey!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Yeah?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Did you eat all the neighbor candy?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Uh well yeah, that was the plan, but by the time I got to it there wasonly a couple of pieces left!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Yeah, and theyve been coming by all day. They love it!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 They love my candy? Oh man!!! Ive gotta go make more!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Hey Mon, you might wanna make some more lasagna too, because somethingmightve happened to a huge chunk of it.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Ross! The neighbors ate all my candy!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Mine stole my newspaper! Its like a crime wave!!  Pheebs, you uh, you got a second.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Sure!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Yeah, ever since you uh, told me that story about that bike I-Icouldnt stop thinking about it. I mean, everyone should have a-a first bike,so 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Oh my God Ross!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 You like it?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 I love it!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Yeah?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Ohh!! Ohh!! And I love you!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Ahh.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Not that way! But the bike brought you a lot closer!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Ah!  Well uh-uh, t-take it downstairs, yknow give ita test ride.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Okay! Oh my God! My first bike! Thank you for the best present Iveever gotten.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	  Youre welcome.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Oh and Chandlers about to cry.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	  Am not!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	  Who is that?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Dont worry, Im brave! I am brave! II am brave!  No-no-no-no!!   Can you tell me who is there please?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Knocker	 My name is Gary, I live upstairs.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Gary	 Hi!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Hi. Do you know what time it is?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Gary	 Its candy time! My roommate says that they taste like little dropsof heaven.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Oh please!  Did you hear that? Little drops of heaven.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	  4:00 A.M.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Gary	 So, can I get some candy?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 I am sorry, but some of us have to get up early and go to work!  He does not know that I am not some of us.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Umm, listen I am sorry, but Ill put some out first thing in themorning.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Gary	 Well okay, Ill swing by later. Do you live in this building? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Um-hmm.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Gary	  Mm! Seems like I wouldve remembered you!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Mm! Night Gar! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  So did you read your evaluation yet?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 No! It was marked confidential I just sent it down to Human Resources.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  Okay please, youre kidding right?! I wrote that one as ajoke for you!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 A joke they would appreciate?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Im thinkin no.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 What did you say?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Umm, I said I thought you were a good kisser, and uh, and that I likeyour tiney-tiny touchie.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 No, not my touchie.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Well, it gets worse. When asked if you take initiative I wrote,"Yes, he was able to unhook my bra with minimal supervision," and under Problemswith Performance I wrote, "Dear God, I hope not," and then uh, then I drew alittle smiley face, and then a small pornographic sketch.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Ross! That is so sweet of you to get Phoebe that bike! When I heard thestory, I almost cried.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Almost cried huh? Hear that Chandler? Almost cried!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Hey, you cry every time somebody talks about Titanic!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	  Those two only had each other!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Phoebe really likes the bike huh?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Oh yeah! I saw her walkin it down the street the other day. Shehad uh, these flowers in the basket. It was so cute.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Yeah, I saw her this morning walkin it by the park.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Wait a minute, she was walking the bike? Both times?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Hey Pheebs?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Oh hi!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Hey! So are you enjoying the bike?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Ohh, uh-huh so much!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Pheebs you uhyou do know how to ride a bike dont you?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Of course!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Umm, can we see you ride it?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Okay.  See?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 See, this is why I told you never get involved with your assistant! Andhere is no such thing as keeping secrets when it comes to affairs.  Did youhear that Chandler? No such thing!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	  What happened? Im just eating candy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Maybe its not as bad as I think. Yknow, maybe theydidnt take it the way I meant it.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Absolutely! Yknow, because touchie can mean both ass and goodworker.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Ugh, I just gotta get the thing back!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Hey Rach?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 That sketch you mentioned? Might it have looked a little something likethis? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Oh my God! Joey!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 What is the matter with you?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Ugh!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Boy I tell ya, this little talent came in handy before I could affordporn.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	 Hi! Im sorry, I know its after hours but I really needcandy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Im sorry, I cant help you. See? Rules are rules.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	 Please! I have people coming from out of town today! And, I told themall about your candy!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 No kidding, out of towners huh? What did you tell em?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	 I told em your candy is absolutely indescribable!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Some people have been saying its yknow little drops of heaven, butwhatever.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	 Please, cant you help me out?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	  Hey Chandler, do we know that lady?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Maybe, isnt she the woman who lives below you and has sex reallyloud?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	  All right, Ill do it just this once!But you cant tell anybody!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	  Yes! Yes! Please, just give it to me!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey, Chandler	 Yeah, thats her.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Woman	  Thank you.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	  Its unbelievable! I-I cant believe thatsign didnt work!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Yknow what would work?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Hmm?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Stop making candy!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 But they like it!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 You mean they like you.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Maybe.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Is that why you became a chef? So that people would like you?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Oh, you really want to talk about getting people to like you huh, funnyman? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Okay, now just remember everything I taught you and youll be fine.Okay? Here we go. ReadySet
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Wait! This seat is really uncomfortable! Yeah,maybe before we start we should just get another one. Perhaps, like an airplaneseator a beanbag chair!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Phoebe, you cant get out of this! Okay? You have to learn howto ride a bike!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Why? Why do I have to learn?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 WellIn-in case of emergency.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 What kind of an emergency?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Well let therewhat if a man comes along and puts a gun to your headand says, "You ride this bike or Ill shIll shoot you."
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Okay, I would ring the bell to distract him and then I would knock thegun out of his hand with a Chinese throwing star.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Okay, Phoebe just-just get-get on the bike andHey! Ill holdyou up and-and push you. Okay?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 You wont let go?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 No!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Swear?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 I swear!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Okay. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Come on.  All right, here we go. All right?  
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 All right.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 All right. Feel good?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Well
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 All right, try pedaling. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Okay. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Thats it, your doing great.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Okay.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Doing great! Yes-yes-yes! Take control! Yes!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Weee!!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Yes!! Yes!!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Oh! Oh! Oh no!! You swore!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 I-I just thought you were doing so well. I
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 I am shocked! Shocked!! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Its a legitimate learning technique.  Wow!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Hey, theres uh, some people outside, askin about candy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Well, theyre just gonna have to wait arent they? Iveonly got two hands!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Need some help?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 No! You dont know the system! Therell be nobody messing withthe system!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 By the way, the week before your wedding you may not see a lot of me. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Oh, hello liar.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	  Look, I-Im really sorry I let go of the bike.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 I couldve been killed I hope you know!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 I know. I know. But, can we please try it again? Huh? I mean, you were soclose Phoebe!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Well, I would love to butthe bike got stolen and the police haveno suspects.  
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Phoebe.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 What?!  What the hell?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 All right, yknow what? If you are not going to learn how to ridethis bike then Im sorry, Im just gonna have to take it back.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 What?! Why?!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Because! Because, it-it-its Itd be like you having thisguitar  and-and never playing it. Okay, this guitar wants to beplayed! And-and this bike wants to be ridden and-and if you dont ride ityou-youre-youre killing its spirit!  The bike is dying.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 All right. If you care enough to make up that load of crap, okay.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Great! Great!  Youre making the bike veryhappy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	  Okay Ross! Please dont die!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Okay, I think we can get the evaluation back before they see it, butwere gonna have to get into Mr. Zelners office. Now, he doesnt get inuntil 10, so hes no problem, but his assistant, Betty, she comes in early to eat herbreakfast at her desk.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Thats kinda sad.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Yeah, well Bettys kinda sad. Which is why I believe I can lure heraway with these chocolates.  Now, while I distract her,you get in the office.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Got it!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Lets roll!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Hello Rachel, you uh, got a minute?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  Yeah, sure Mr. Zelner, for youanythingminute. Okay. Fine.  Abort the plan, abort the plan. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Uh actually, Id like to speak with both of you.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Okay. Uh, well can we, can we get you anything Mr. Zelner? Maybe somechocolates? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Umm, no. Thanks, but Ill give these to Betty.  So I read your evaluation of Tag, or to use his fullname, Tag Sweetcheeks Jones. Is something going on with you two?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  Oh my God. Can you imagine if there was?! I mean,  what would happen exactly.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Well, Id be forced to file a report. Id have to consultwith the legal department, and your future at the company would be in jeopardy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Well
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	  Uh Mr. Zelner, Im the one who filled in thatevaluation.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	  Yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah-yeah, I thought it would be funny.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 You wrote that you have a cute touchie?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	  Yes. I have a weird sense of humor, and Im kindastrangely proud of my butt.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Its kind of a risky joke Tag, and what is-what is this drawingI cant figure out what this is?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Youre lookin at it upside downyknow what?  It doesnt matter.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Mr. Zelner	 Yeah, its not like I dont have a sense of humor, huh?Hell, I even enjoy a naughty limerick now and then. But theres a time and a place,huh?! Unless you uh, have a limerick right now?  No? Okay, well uh,youve  got my fax number. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Whoa! I cant believe you did that. That was really sweet.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 No, dont worry about it.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 No, you couldve lost your job.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Are you kidding me?! With a cute butt like this, Id find work.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 Thank you! Youre great! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Yknow what? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 What?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 I feel great.  In fact!  What?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	 I It justit took me so long to get that desk organized.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Tag	 Oh, Im sorry. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Rachel	  There it is. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	  What is going on? 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Man	 Were waiting for the candy.  Bring out thecandy!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Yeah lady! Give us candy!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Joey!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Whats up buddy?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 What are you doing?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Waiting for candy.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Get in here!  Hey, and you can not smoke in here!  Merry Christmas.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	  Okay, guys! The candy is coming; Ijust need another 15 minutes for the chocolate to cool!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	All	 We want candy! We want candy now! 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 All right everybody! Just be quiet! Be quiet! Be quiet!!Pipe-pipe-pipe down!  What is the matter with you people?! This womanwas trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could try to get toknow all of you, and Ill bet that not one of you can tell me her name! Am I right?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	The Man	  Candy Lady?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 No not  Candy Lady.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	  Hey, if we know it can we havecandy?!!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 All right, yknow what? Forget it, all of you forget it!Youve ruined it! Go home! Youve ruined it! Youve ruined it!
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	 Thats right, its all ruined! You guys ruined everything! Youruined it!  
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	  Thank you.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 Youre welcome. 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Did you smoke?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Chandler	 No! Smokes-A-Lot Lady blew smoke directly into my mouth.Eh-uhare you okay?
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Monica	 Im fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean,someone slipped a-a threatening note under the door.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Joey	  Oh yeah, sorry about that. Mob mentality orwhatever, I dont know 
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 I cant believe it! I did it! I rode a bike! I never thoughtId be able to do that! Thank you Ross.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Ross	 Oh hey, dont thank me, thank yourself. Youre the one who facedher fears and ultimately overcame them.
07	09	0709	The One With All The Candy	Phoebe	 Dont be so corny Ross, its not an after-school special. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Buh-bye.  I just got us reservations atMichelles and tickets to the Musicman to celebrate our first holiday seasonas a betroughed couple.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Betrothed 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 betrothed couple.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel, Monica	 Hi!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Haaaa...  ... ahhhh!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Pheebs?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Huh?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Skull?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, it's my mom's.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Oh my god!!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 No, no, no. It's not! It's not my mom. It belonged to mom. Yeah, no, sheused to put it out every Christmas to remind us, that even though it's Christmas, peoplestill die. And, you can put candy in it. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	All	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	  Licorice?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Sure!  Hey, I just found out, I get Ben forthe holidays this year.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	All	 Ohh! That's great!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Are you gonna dress up as Santa?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Nope. I mean, I know Susan does every year, but I think I wanna take thisyear to teach him all about Hanukkah.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 And maybe I could teach Ben about the Christmas skull and how peopledie.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Hmm.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Hey. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Did you know he was in there?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 No.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 How long have we been home?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 About a half an hour.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Lovely!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey, you know what I was thinking? When we get married, are you gonnachange your last name to Bing?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 No.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Why not?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Bing's weird.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Oh, hey, you guys!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Hey. Guess what! My landlord just called and my apartment is gonna getready soon, so I guess I'll be moving out.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Ahh, Phoebe, I'm gonna miss you!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yes, you will be very sad. All right, well I gotta go tell Rachel thegood news.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Ohh! You guys gonna be living together again?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yeah, why not?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Well, she's just so much fun with Joey, I just assumed, she'd still beliving with him.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Why do you think, she's having so much fun living with Joey?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 No reason, exceptshetoldme.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Really? So she said, she didnt wanna live with me anymore?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 No! No, she didn't say that. I-I-I think you should talk to Monicanow.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Phoebe, don't worry about it. I'm sure she wants to live with you.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 You're sure? You're absolutely sure?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Well, no. But, um, I bet she probably does.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Probably? Yeah, I don't like that word.  Kind of what probably really means. Yeah, uh-huh. Yeah, oh,"Your mom probably won't kill herself," yknow? I'm sorry, but I'm nothanging all my hopes of Rachel and I living together on-on "Probably!"Yknow? You gotta take care of yourselves!  In thisworld history teaches us nothing! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Bing doesn't seem so weird now, does it?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Hey! Great, youre home! Guess what Phoebe got me for Christmas!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Drums?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	  No! Drums!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	  Hi, could we get two burritos to go, please?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 I'm sorry. But not that sorry, 'cause you don't have to live with it.Um, we have a reservation under the name Chandler Bing.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Maitre D'	 Oh-kay, we'll have a table for you in about 45 minutes.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Forty-five minutes? We have tickets to the Musicman at 8:00.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Maitre D'	 I'm sorry. Christmas is a very busy time, sir.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Is this because of the burrito thing?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	  You need to give him money.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Give him money? It was a joke!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 No, to get a table! Places like are always shakin you down.Everybody wants to be paid off.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Right, calm down, O'Mally. I'll slip him some money.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 You've got to be smooth about it.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey, I can be smooth. Listen, we're a little bit in a hurry, so, if you can get us a table a little quicker, I'dappreciate it. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Maitre D'	 Of course, sir.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Okay. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 How did it go?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Had the money in the wrong hand. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Wooooooo, hehehe. Hey, ahh, you don't feel like you're gonna throw up, doya?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 No.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Well, I do, so let's...  So, Ben, youuh, you know what holiday is coming up, don't ya?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Christmas.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Yep, and you know what other holiday is coming up?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Christmas eve.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Yes, but also  Hanukkah!See, you're part Jewish, and-and Hanukkah is a Jewish holiday.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Santa has reindeers that can fly!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Right, um, but, on Hanukkah, Hanukkah is a celebration of a miracle. See,years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	  Jingle bells, jingle bells...
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Okay, that's right, yes, but on Hanukkah, uh, we sing, uh Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel, I made you out of clay.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	  Rudolph, the red-nosed reindeer...
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Okay, it's not a contest.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 When is Santa coming?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Well, how about this year, instead of Santa, we have fun celebratingHanukkah?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 No Santa? Was I bad?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 No! Oh, no-no-no. Hey, you weren't bad, you've been very good, Ben.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Santa's mad at me.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 No, hey-hey, come on,  Ben, Santa isnot mad at you, okay? Hey, you're-you're his favorite little guy!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 So Santa's coming?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Yes! Santa's coming!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 It's easy! Just keep it casual! Give him a kind word, shake his hand andgive him the money!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 How do you know so much about this?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 I don't know.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Richard used to do it, didn't he?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 We'd be eating our soup right now.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Mustached bastard
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	  Okay, those people just left, come on! Quick!Give him the money and get their table!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	  Excuse me...
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Male Guest	  Good evening. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	  Ahh-hahaha! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Ha!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 So you like the drums! That's, that's great! Yknow, I was worried,that, you know, they would maybe an unbearable living situation. All right, okay, well,apparently not! So, yay!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Hey-hey, Pheebs, check it out, we already learned a song. Ready? One, two, three, four...
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel, Joey	 Tequila!!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 That's fun. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Gunther	 Here you go.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Thank you Gunther, put it there.  Definitely noteasier with coins.  Thank you.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Thank you.   HeyPheebs!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Here.  Now I only owe you $49.50.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey Pheebs!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Hey! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 If you wanna give Joey a Christmas present that disrupts the entirebuilding, why not get him something a little bit more subtle, like a wrecking ball, or avile of small pox to release in the hallway?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 It's not just the drum noise. Every five minutes, Joey throws his sticksin the air, and I have to hear, "Oh my eye! Oh god, my eye!" I mean, it is soannoying.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yes, thank you. You see, this is how normal people are supposed to reactto drums.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Phoebe, you got Joey drums to annoy Rachel, so she wouldn't wanna livethere anymore?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Maybe on some level.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Joey, yknow that you could just not throw the sticks up in theair.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 What is Rock 'n' Roll about that?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Hey, Joey, I got youanother present. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Oh wait, before you tell me what it is!  Okay, whatis it?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 It's atarantula!  Oh! God! Rachel, look, I'm sorry. What was I thinking giving Joey this big,gross, scary spider in such a poorly constructed cage?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 What are you talking about? I love them!  Yeah, Ihad a tarantula when I was a kid. But it-it died, because my cat ate it. And then, then mycat died. But Joey, isn't this cool?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Is it on me? I feel, I feel like it's on me! I got, hey! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh, isn't that adorable? Joey is afraid of the tarantula.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Ah, yeah, he's so adorable, God, he's just so much fun, Joeyis the best, I'm glad you're having so much fun here. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 What? Wait-wait a minute, what? Phoebe, what's the matter?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Our apartment is ready.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 And that makes you angry because
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Because you would rather live here with Joey.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Where did you get that?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Monica and Chandler said that you were having so much fun here. Andapparently no amount of drums or tarantulas is gonna change that.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Phoebe?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Hm?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Did you get all this stuff for Joey to try and drive me out of theapartment? Honey, if you wanted to do that, you might as well just gotten him a fish, youknow how fish freaked me out!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Fish!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna livetogether, we're roommates; that's the deal.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yes, but I wanted you to want to live with me, but okay, if you'rehaving so much fun over here
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh, it's so much more fun with you.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 We did have fun, didn't we?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 We did!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh, anyway, they say, if we want, we can see it tonight.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh, I would love to!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yay, okay!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Good, good, good, good, good. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Great, all right, okay, and Monica ask me to make the drumming stop.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Um...  Done!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Hey!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Salesman	 Hello, Sir. You're here to return those pants?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 No, these are my pants.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Salesman	 Oh. Okay! How can I help you?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Well, uh, do you have a Santa-outfit left?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Salesman	 Two days before Christmas? Sorry, man.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Okay look, do-do, you have anything Christmassy? I promised my son, and Ireally don't want to disappoint him, um, come on, Iuh, you gotta have something.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 I'm the holiday armadillo! I'm a friend of Santa's and he sent me here towish you  a Merry Christmas!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 What happened to Santa, Holiday Armadillo?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  Santa was unavailable so close to Christmas.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Wow, come in, have a seat. You must be exhausted coming all the wayfromTexas.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Texas?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 That's right, Ben. I'm Santa's representative for all the southern states.And Mexico! But, Santa sent me here to give you these presents, Ben.  Maybe theLady will help me with these presents.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Wow! Thanks!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 You're welcome, Ben. Merry Christmas, ooh, and Happy Hanukkah!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Are you for Hanukkah, too? Because I'm part-Jewish.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  You are? Me, too!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Because Armadillos also wandered in the desert?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  You wanna wander in the hall?  Ooh, hey Ben, what ifthe Holiday Armadillo told you all about the festival of lights?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Cool!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Yeah!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Come on Ben.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	  Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Santa! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Hey! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 What are you doing here, Santa?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here,weirdturtle-man?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here togive Ben some presents. Remember?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 What?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Did you bring me any presents, Santa?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 You bet I did, Ben, put it there!   Well, it would have worked this time, if his handsweren't so damn small!  Ho, ho, ho!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, theArmadillo, and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence, I never thoughtI'd say.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	  What are you doing?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santacostume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Thank you, but, but you gotta leave.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Why?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Because, I'm finally getting him excited about Hanukkah, and, andyou're-youre wrecking it.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 But I didn't get to shape my belly like a bowl full of jelly.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 I'm sorry, Chandler but this, this is really important to me.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Fine, I'll give the suit back.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	  Hey, you think, you can keep it another night? 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Santa? Really?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 Yes, is that okay?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Did your Dad ever dress up like Santa?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Monica	 No.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Then it's okay! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Okay Ben, Santa has to go. Say good-bye!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 No! Why does he have to go?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Because, if Santa and the HolidayArmadillo?  ...areever in the same room for too long the universe will implode. Merry Christmas!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 No! Why can't the Armadillo leave? I want Santa!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Fine, I-I give up. Santa, Santa can stay.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 Well, I'll stay, but only because I wanna hear about Hanukkah. Ben,will you sit here with Santa and learn about Hanukkah?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Okay, Santa!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 All right, it's time for the story of Hanukkah. Years and years ago, therewere these people called the Maccabees.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	  Merry Christmas!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh wow! Look at this place!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh, this is terrible. Oh, theyve made so many changes I canteven feel my grandmothers presence anymoreOoh! New sconces!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Oh my God!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 What?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Okay, remember uh, remember how you told me that yourgrandmother put up that wall to make that into two bedrooms?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yeah?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 And remember how you always said you were afraid the landlord would findout and then tear it down?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Yeah?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Do you really not know where Im going with this?  It left! Its one huge room!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh no!   Oh! Wow!!!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 See?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Well, I guess well just have to put the wall back up.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 You cant, because of the new skylight!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Theres a skylight?! Wow!!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 So what should we do? Should we start looking for a new place?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	  Yknow Im-Im sensing that um, mygrandmother would not be comfortable with that.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh yeah? Startin to feel her again there are we?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 A little bit, yeah.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Pheebs is your grandmother maybe saying that you should live here alone?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 You heard her too?! You have the gift!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Phoebe, its okay. I like living with Joey.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Are you sure?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh please, I hate packing, its closer to work, and we do have fun.Although, Im really gonna miss living with you.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh me too.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 I know.  Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? Listen,Im gettin something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keepthe one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 No, I do not hear that.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 and the miracle was that that little bit of oil that shouldvejust lasted just one day, burned for
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	  Eight whole days.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Thats right, and thats why we celebrate Hanukkah today. Theend.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ben	 Awesome!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Yeah?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Chandler	 My favorite part was when Superman flew all the Jews out ofEgypt. 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 The Armadillo was actually not so thrilled about that part! OkayBen, its time to light the Hanukkah candles! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Hey! 
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	  Wow! It looks like the EasterBunnys funeral in here.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Ross	 Come on, come on, were-were-were lighting the candles!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Oh.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Oh.
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Phoebe	 Okay, I understand why Superman is here, but why is there aporcupine at the Easter Bunnys funeral?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 I got it!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	  Is it back in the cage?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Its back in cage!
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Joey	 Cage closed?
07	10	0710	The One With The Holiday Armadillo	Rachel	 Joey, would you just come out here and stop being such a baby!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Ohh. Mmm.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  Hi.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Hey, you have got to try this cheesecake.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh, yknow I'm not that much of a sweet tooth. IWow. My God, so creamy. Oh my God,this is the best cheesecake I have ever had. Where did you get this? 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	  It was at the front door. When I got home. Somebody sentit to us.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Chandler, this is not addressed to you. This is addressed to Mrs.Braverman downstairs.  Thief.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Ino! I didn't read the box before I opened it. And you can'treturn a box after you've opened the box.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Why, why not?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Because it's too delicious.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Chandler, you stole this cheesecake. That is wrong.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 No-no-no! It is going to be okay, because Mrs. Braverman is gonna sendaway for a free one and that way we all win! The only losers are the big cheesecakeconglomerate,  Mommas Little Bakery.  I feel terrible,Im a horrible, horrible, horrible person.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  Oh, Im sorry what?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 All right, I should get going, big day a work. Yknow Im in acoma? Today, they do this test on me and it turns out Im not brain dead.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 So
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Ah-ah-ah Mr. Smartie Pants, its just not my character thatsnot brain dead. Hey, so Pheebs, we still on for tonight?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Absolutely!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Ill see you at 8:00.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Okay.  
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh, whats at 8:00?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh, I have dinner plans with Joey. We get together about once a month todiscuss the rest of you guys.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Wow, did not know that! May I say how lovely you look today?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Duly noted.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Thanks.   Oh! So for tomorrow,do you want to rent a car and drive down together or what?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 What are you talking about?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Cousin Frannies wedding, its tomorrow night.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 You were invited?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 No.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 My God, I cant believe this! I mean I knew that mom and dad wereinvited, but I thought that was it! I mean from the ages 7 to 9 Frannie and I wereinseparable!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Well, maybe since the age of 9, Frannies made some new friends.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Well l-look okay, its probably just a mistake. Let me call AuntSheryl okay? Maybe you are invited and the invitation just got lost in the mail.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Yeah, well you call her and tell her that yknow when we were kidsher precious little Frannie tried to undress me several times, okay? And if I hadnthave stopped her, there probably wouldnt even be a wedding to go too.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Yknow, she tried to undress me too.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 I used to undress my cousin Glenn. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Joseph Francis Tribbiani are you home yet?!!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Umm, I think hes still out. Whats wrong?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well, Ill tell you Rachel Karen Green, I had plans with Joeytonight and he left me this note. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  "Pheebs, cant make it, got a date. Talk toyou later. Big Daddy."  Big Daddy?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh thats a nickname we were trying out.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Hey, yknow what nickname never caught on? The Ross-A-Tron! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	  Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh! Heres Joseph Francis!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Oh-Wha-Ho! What are you middle naming me for?! I left you a note!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 So what?! That doesnt give you the right to ditch me!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Hey, you can cancel plans with friends if there is the possibility forsex!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Phoebe hes right, that is the rule.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 I dont accept this rule. When me make plans, I expect you to showup. Okay, I cant just be a way to kill time til you meet someone better!Yknow boyfriends and girlfriends come and go, but this  is for life!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Wow! Im so sorry; I had no idea it would bother you this much.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well, it does.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Okay, can I-can I make it up to you? Huh? Im sorry.  Howabout uh, dinner tomorrow night?! Ill pay for myself!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Okay, you wore me down.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Hey Joe, while youre over there how about another beer for theRoss-A-Tron?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 The RossIs that back?!! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Hi!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Another cheesecake came! They delivered it to the wrong address again!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 So just bring it back downstairs, whats the problem?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 I cant seem to say goodbye.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Are you serious?! Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago andyou want more?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Well Ive forgotten what it tastes like okay?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 It was cheesecake. It was fine. It had a buttery, crumbly, grahamcracker crust, with a very rich yet light, cream cheese filling  Wow! Mywhole mouth just filled with saliva! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	  Yknow what? Forget it! We are justhungry! We have not had lunch! We are just light-headed! So let us go out and have lunchand forget about the cheesecake.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Yeah and well drop it off downstairs so that were nottempted.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Good idea. Where do you want to go to lunch?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Mommas Little Bakery, Chicago, Illinois. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Awww! Mel Torme died.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Joey, that papers like a year old!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Aw! Does that mean the Sam Goodys sale is over?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	  Hey.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Hey.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Hey.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 So I finally heard back from Aunt Sheryl and apparently it wasnta mistake. Ahh, theres-theres limited seating in the hall.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Limited seating?!  I am just one tiny person!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Well yeah, but she doesnt know that. I mean, the last time she sawyou-you wouldve turned one of those little wedding chairs into kindling. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	  Limited seating! Oh, that is such a lame excuse! Thatsnot the reason shes not inviting me!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Oh whats the big deal?! I wasnt even invited to the ceremony,just the reception. And-and yknow what? If it makes you feel any better, Joan and Iwill just make an appearance and then, and then well-well leave early as asign of protest.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Joan?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Yeah, Joan Tedeski my date. Shes an assistant professor in theLinguistics department. Tall, very beautiful, and despite what some people say, notbroad backed!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Wait a minute, you got Ross Gellar and guest?! I wasnt invited andyou got "and guest?!"
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Uh-uh, excuse me, I do have to interrupt on Rosss behalf. I-I thinkthe rule applies here yknow, since she has a chance to get on broad back
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	  Not broad backed!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Wait a minute, yknow, youre bringing me!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 What? I cant cancel on Joan!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Why not?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 BecDid you not hear me?! Shes an assistant professor in theLinguistics department, okay? Theyre wild! Why do you want to come anyway?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Because! Shes my cousin. I mean, we grew up together! Werefamily yknow? Well thats important to me.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Okay, all right, Ill take you. Ill go call Joan. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Aww thats nice. Family should be there, huh? This is her wedding,happiest day of her life.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	  Well see.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Well, thank you for lunch.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 What? Wait a minute, I didnt pay, I thought you paid!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 So apparently we just dont pay for food anymore.  Do you see what I see?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  Its still there! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Mrs. Braverman must be out. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 She could be out of town. Maybe shell be gone for months.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 By then, the cheesecake may have gone bad. We dont want her tocome back to bad cheesecake.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 No that could kill her.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Well, we dont want that.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 No so were protecting her.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 But we should take it.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 But we should move quick.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Why?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Because I think I just heard her moving around in there.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	   Oh my God! Thats David!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 David who?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 David the scientist guy, David that I was in love with, David who wentto Russia and broke my heart David!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	  Oh my God!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh, you say someones name enough, they turn around.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Phoebe?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 David!  What-what are you doing here? Arentyou supposed to be in Russia?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Yeah, Im just, Im just in town for a conference. Umm, Godyou look phenomenal!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well Yeah. You look great too. Did you get a haircut?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Yeah. Well I-I got like thirty of them.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Yeah.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Umm, look I-I-I got a confession to make
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Uh, I-I-I was hoping to run into you here. I didnt know whether Ishould call or not, yknow I-I was only in town for a few days. And yknow, Ididnt want to intrude on your life or-or anything like that, but I-I really wantedto see you andbut I didnt know if you wanted to see me.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well, of course I would want to see you. II think about you allthe time.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Really? Because I think about you all the time. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Really?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 I mean, theres a statue in Minsk
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 That reminds me of you so much, I mean umm, it-its actuallyof Lenin. But, yknow at certain angles
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Yeah.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Umm, anywayDo you want to have dinner tonight?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	  Yes! Oh no! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	  Oh. Uh, what?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 I cant. I cant believe I have plans, I cant. Can youdo it tomorrow night though?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Uh no, I have to go in a few hours. I have to be on the red-eye. Welllisten, yknow, next time youre in Minsk umm
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 What are you doing?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well, I have plans with Joey tonight.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 So! Hell understand!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 No he wont. And thats not even the point! Monica, I made awhole speech about you do not cancel plans with friends! And now yknow what? Justbecause, potentially, the love of my life comes back from Russia just for one night, I-Ishould change my beliefs?! I should change beliefs! No! No! No, if I dont have myprinciples, I dont have anything!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 God, you are so strong.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Or! I should rush through dinner with Joey and I can meet David at 9:00!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  Oh my God! That is so good!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Im full, and yet I know if I stop eating this, Ill regretit.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	  Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	  What do you got there?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh its umm, its tofu cake. Do you want some? 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 What are you doing tonight?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Huh? Uh 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Dude! Dude! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Oh!  Sorry. Uh, Ive got those plans withPhoebe, why?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh really? Uh, Monica said she had a date at 9:00.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 What?! Tonight?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Thats what Monica said.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 After she gave me that big speech?! She goes and makes a date with a guyon the same night she has plans with me? I think shes trying to pull a fast one onBig Daddy!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Oh here, I think this is us.  Yeah.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Limited seating my ass. Lets see who made the cut.  Hi!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Wedding Guest	 Hi!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Im Monica Gellar. Who do you know the bride and groom?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Wedding Guest	 Oh, I used to work with Frannie.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Used to work with her. Used to! Im a relative and I didntget invited! A blood relative! Blood!!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	  Stop saying, "Blood" to strangers.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	  So, how about you huh? How do you know thehappy couple?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Second Guest	 We went to college with both of them and now we livenext door.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Okay, youre fine.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	 Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	 Are you guys ready?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Yes! I will have the green salad, umm the house salad, and watersfine.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	 Okay.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Okay. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	  And for you sir?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Yeah, this slow roasted salmon, just how slow are we talkin here?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	 Its uh, its already been roasted.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Ohh, then no. Maybe I should hear those specials again.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh Joey, weve heard the specials three times! Okay? Theresprime rib, mahi mahi, and a very special lobster ravioli. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	 Actually were out of the lobster ravioli. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Oh well, that changes everything!  Yknow what Pheebs?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Huh?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 You were right before. I mean, friends are so important.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	  Yeah, Im very wise. I know.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Yknow-yknow what I really want?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 What?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Is to have a long, long talk. Yknow? Get Joey out on the open roadand really open him up.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Waiter	  Any progress?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Yes! I will have the lobster ravioli.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 God Joey, this is taking forever!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Whats the rush? What?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 W-wI justits thatI haveyknow Ihave-I have an appointment. And its very important.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Whoa-whoa, what is it?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Well Its a date.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 A date?! No, no Pheebs you-you must be mistaken, because I know youwouldnt schedule a date on the same night you have plans with a friend!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Come on Joey, dont make me feel badly about this.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 No, Im gonna!! Thats right! Yeah, you made me feel reallyguilty about goin out with that girl! Like-like-like I did something terrible toyou! And now Pheebs, youre doing the same thing!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 ThatIts not the same thing! This is totallydifferent! This is with David! Remember David, the scientist guy? Okay, hes veryspecial to me.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Okay, well my girl from the other night was special. She was a scientisttoo!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 She was?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Well, she graduated from high school!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Okay, whatever. Yknow what? I dont have time have time toconvince you because hes only here for four hours, and Im gonna go see him!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Fine!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Yeah!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Fine!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Yeah! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	  What are you still doin here?! I told you, lobsterravioli!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Hey! Oh, I was just about to leave. I-I-I-I didnt think you werecoming.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh, I wouldnt miss this.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Well, Im very glad youre here. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh, youre such a gentleman.  Come on! Weregoing to my place! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Are you eating the cheesecake without me?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	  Mm-mmm. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 I will give you a hundred dollars to whistle right now.  How can you eat thecheesecake without me?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh, what are you going to do?! Are you gonna go run tell Monica?! Areyou gonna tell Joey?! No! Because then you will have to tell them what we did! We aredesert stealers! We are living outside the law!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Yknow what? I dont trust you with this cake anymore! And Igot it first, and Im takin it back! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 What?! What?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh yes! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Wait a minute!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh yes!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no-no-no, no you dont!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh yes! Oh yes!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 You think I trust you with it?! No! Were gonna split it! You takehalf and I take half!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Well thats not fair, youve already had some!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 What? Oh, well then yknow what? I think Monica would be veryinterested to know that you called her cheesecake dry and mealy.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 What do we use to split it?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Okay!  All right, pick a half.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	  Okay well, this side looks bigger. UhTheres more crust on this side. Yknow? So, maybe if I measured
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh for God sake just pick a piece!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 All right, Ill pick that one. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Thats also the smaller piece.  Okay,there you go. Enjoy your half my friend, but that is it. No sharing. No switching, anddont come crying to me if you eat your piece to fast.  Oh!!!!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	  Ohhh!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Okay, you gotta give me some of your piece.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Oh-ho-ho-ho-no! No! No switching! No sharing, and dont comecrying to me! Ha-ha-ha! I may just sit here and have my cake all day! Just sit here in thehallway and eat my  
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	The Woman	 Ross, sweetheart!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Oh, hey Aunt Millie.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Aunt Millie	 Isnt it a beautiful wedding?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Yes, yes it is. Its uh  Every time on the lips! Why?! Why on lips?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Heres Frannie. Hmm, wont she be happy to see me? 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Now wait a minute, you be nice! All right? I didnt bring you here soyou can ambush her.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Frannie was the one who found your Playboys and showed them tomom.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 That bitch! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Frannie	  Monica! What
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Am I doing here? Why? Surprised to see me? Ross brought me. How do youlike that?!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	  Hi Frannie, congratulations.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 You invite my brother, you invite my whole family, and not me?! Why?!WhatWhy wouldnt you want me at your wedding? What could I have possibly done?! Stuart!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Frannie	 I believe you know my husband.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 So its really a question of who could you have possibly done.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Oh, I hate this but I-I-I have to go. I-I cant miss myflight.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Are you sure? Ill bet theres another flight to Minsk inlike
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 July. Umm,  
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Thats really beautiful. What does it mean?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Please, clean my beakers. I dont get out of the lab much.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Thats good. I got to admit, I thought it was something else.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Yeah, I Well I really actually wanted to say umm, that, but um, Ifigured I probably shouldnt because yknow, Ihave to leave.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Youre right! Youre right. Dont say it. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 I-I do though.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 I do too. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	David	 Bye Phoebe. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	  Okay, nows not the time Joey. All right? You can yellat me tomorrow.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 No! No! No Pheebs, Im not gonna yell at you. I just yknow,started thinking about you and David and Iremember how bummed you were the firsttime he left. And I just Oh Pheebs, come here.  Are you okay?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 No Im not okay. The only guy Ive ever been crazy about hasgone to Minsk and I may neverI may never see him again. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Hey, yknow you could always visit him.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 Oh right, like theyre gonna let me have a passport.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 Anything I can do? Whatever you need.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Phoebe	 WellButNow, if-if you can achieve positronic distillation ofsub-atomic particles yknow before he does, then he can come back. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	 I can give it a shot.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor on it!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Chandler	 Stick to your side!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Rachel	 Hey, come on now!
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Joey	  All right, what are we havin? 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Monica	 Oh wait I forgot my wrap.
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 What? Oh, okay. Wait here. 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Aunt Millie	 Hi sweetie! Are you leaving?
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Well
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Aunt Millie	 Give us a kiss. Come on! Come on! 
07	11	0711	The One With All The Cheesecakes	Ross	 Why?! Why on the lips?! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	  Ross, whens this comet thing start?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Well, technically it seven billion years ago 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	All	  Oh no! Oh no! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay! Okay! Fine, Ill stop! No teaching, okay? Well just watchthe pretty light streaking across the sky.  Okay? Whos official name is Bapstein-King.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	All	 Okay! Okay! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	  There it is! Oh, look at that! Isnt Mother Natureamazing?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  Thats a plane!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Well, all right. 1700 bags of peanuts flying that high, thatspretty amazing too.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Hey, I wonder if you can see my apartment from up here.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 No. No, you cant.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 What?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Oh I dont-I dont know.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Man, look at all those stars!  Infinite space. It really, really makes you wonder, doesnt it?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Yknow whatelse makes you wonder?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Huh?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Check out the rack on this chick! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay, weve been out here for two hours and we havent seenany stupid comets. Can we go now? I mean, Chandlers getting chilly. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  No, Im not!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Then why are you wearing Monicas jacket?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Because its flattering!  Come on Monica! Come onMonica! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Yeah actually, I think were gonna take off too. We rented a movie.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Oh! I wont say, no to a movie!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Uh Pheebs, we just actually kinda wanted to be alone.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Shh! Get me out of here.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Oh. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Ross!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 What?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Come here, check this out!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 What? Is it the comet? 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 No! No-no. Look, theres a bug stuck in tar right here. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Joey comeI cant believeI bring you here to see theBapstein-King comet, one of natures most spectacular phenomenon, and all you careabout are bugs stuck in tar and-and some woman!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Yknow, theres two women dude.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Show me where?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Right-right up here. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	  Joey wheres the pipethat was holding the door open?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  I dont know!  Yeah, I do.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Joey!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 What?! All rightHey! Dont look at me! Youre the one whowanted to come up and look for some stupid Burger King comet!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Its called the Bapstein-King comet, okay? Hey! Hey! Bapstein was a very well respected astronomer! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Oh no! No! No! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  Monica!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Shes sleeping.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 I know, just quick-quick question, quick question. Which one was DeepImpact and which one was Armageddon?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Deep Impact was the one with Robert Duval, Armageddon iswhats going to happen to you if you wake me up.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Sorry, I justcant sleep. Ooh!  Where is that book that you are reading with the two women who wereice-skating and wearing, wearing those hats with the flowers on it? Because every time Ilook at that cover Im like
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 It is in the living room where there is also a light! And no one willkick you in the shin.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 What?!  Ow! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	  Please dont be a spaceship. Please dont be a space ship.  Oh thank God! How could you be beeping?! I just disconnected you! I took out your battery! How can
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Smoke Detector	 Beep!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Dont interrupt me!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Rachel!! Monica!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Come on!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 I cant believe this!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 All right well, yknowI guess we know what we have to do to getdown.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	  Yeah, I guess we dont have achoice.  Help us! Please help us! Were stuck up on the roofand we cant get down!!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Ross. I was thinking we could just go down the fire escape. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	  I know, I wasnt finished.  But dont worry! Were gonna go down the fire escape!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Shhhhhhhhh!!!  Im sorry, I thought maybe Idmake some warm milk and it would help me sleep.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 With a wok?  I thought you were going toread my boring book to put you asleep.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 It got interesting! Damn you Oprah!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Here, let me make the milk, Im up anyway.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Hey, yknow what we can do? Yknow, now that we are up? Wecan just like talk to each other all night long, yknow like we did when we werefirst going out. Itd be fun!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay that does sound like fun. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Okay, so how bummed were you when the second sister died huh?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 The second sister dies?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  No. No, I-I was, I was talking about the book I was reading.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 The second sister dies in Archie and Jughead Double Digest?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Thats correct.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 You wanna go in the bedroom? Its a little more comfortable.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Sure.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Okay.  Oh wait! Umm, did you sendthose contracts to Milan?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 If this is your idea of sexy talk? 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 No seriously, yknow the contracts I gave you, did you overnightthem?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 What contracts?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do thatI dont get.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Like what?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Yknow, like the thing when you put the phone in your pants?  Tag! Im serious! This isnt funny! Those contracts absolutelyhad to go out today!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Rach, Im sorry, but you didnt give me any contracts!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Yes I did! And I put a little Post-It on it that said, "Mustgo out today," and underlined today three times and, and then I put a little heart inthe corner because I didnt want to seem to bossy.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Im telling you, you never gave them to me.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Yknow what Tag, if we went down to the office you would see thosecontracts sitting on your desk.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 No, I would see you looking embarrassed because they are not on mydesk!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Or maybe you would see me looking embarrassed because you are talking onthe phone with your crotch!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 You wanna go down to the office right now?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 No! Come on its late, were not gonna go down to the office.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Okay I understand.  I wouldnt want to be proved wrongeither.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Okay get your coat!  Oh! When did you unhookthis?  Nice work!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 All right, it wont go down any further. Its stuck.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Ugh. Well, were just gonna have to jump.  Yeah.Now, were gonna have to make sure to land to the right of that patch of ice, okay?Not hit the dumpster on the other side and uh, and try to avoid that-that weird brownishred stuff in the middle. So, when you get down thereyou go up to theroof and you let me in.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Oh whoa-whoa wait a minute! I have to do it?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Yeah! Oh yeah, youll be fine! It-itll be uh, just like bungyjumping. Yknow? But instead of bouncing back up you-you wont.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 What if I smack my head on the concrete?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Well, Im gonna lie to you Joey, its a possibility.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  I dont know Ross! I-I tell youwhat, lets flip to see who does it, okay? You-you call it in the air, all right?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Oh, all right.  Tails!  Can you-can you see what it is?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 No.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay. Well, you be careful.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 What? No! No Ross! No-no! Stop! Im not jumping! Okay, look I have anaudition tomorrow and I cant go if I break my leg.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Well Im jumping! I have a son! Okay? He wont have a fatherif-if I die!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Well all right so, it looks like were even!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Okay. So, this wire is connected to this wire which plugs into here. Okay so, to get the beeping to stop all I have todo  Well done, Pheebs.   What do you want from me?!!!!!!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay, heres your milk. What do you want to talk about? 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  What? What? What?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Ohh! Ohhhh! Were you sleeping sweetie? Im sorry. Here. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Okay! Feel free to look, but Im telling you those contracts are noton this desk.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Oh how can you possibly know? Look at this mess, Tag! I mean,this is what Im talking about! You have to be organized! Youve got newspapers!Youve got magazines! You gotOhh!  And who is this chippy? Alittle young for you Tag, but whatever.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Its my sister.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Okay, very cute braces. Anyway yknow what, the point isTag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 So when do you imagine you gave them to me? In the morning or in theafternoon?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 In the afternoon. Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. He putthem on my desk, and then I put a Post-It on it  that said, "Must go out today." So you just keep looking in there! Allright?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Its not here.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Puzzler. A bit of a puzzle. Why dont you um, check the copy room,maybe you left the contracts in there?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 How could I have left them in the copy room?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 I dont know Tag! How can your genitals make phone calls? Okay?Its not a perfect world! Just go please.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Fine.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Thank you.  Hello?  I still dont get it.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Are you still awake?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Yeah! You?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 You do know that was me who just said that right?  Hey. As long as were both up
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  Yeah?  I hope youre not thinkingabout cleaning the living room.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Man, Im starving! What the hell was I thinking at dinner?! "Doyou want soup or salad?" Both! Always order both!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	  Yknow, yknow Imlookin and I dont think anyones home here. I say we just break thewindow, crawl through, and-and yknow explain later.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Yeah? Really? No ones home?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 I dont think so. Hello?  When you get in there 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Okay, this is where you and I part ways.  Noisy bitch!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 What?! What are you doing?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Do you know what just happened?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Yeah. We-we had sex and then we fell asleep.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 No. We were in the middle of sexand you fell asleep.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Nooo! No, thats not true. No, best time ever! Yeah, you rocked meworld! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	  Monica?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 What?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 I was giving you some of my best moves, and you missed it. So pleasewake up so we can do it right!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay. Okay, Im ready. Come on big fella!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Okay.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Give me the good stuff.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Yeah!  No! No! No! Dont fall asleep! Okay,I am going to make you some coffee.  And I probably wont spill coffee grounds all overthe kitchen floor.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay, Im up! Im up!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Hi! I got you some coffee. To, uh  fair enough. So! Doyou got anything for me?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Still no luck.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Oh my God! Did you check your entire desk! Did you check all thedrawers!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Do you want me to check again?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Well yeah, I wish that you would.  Well, noits not in there!  How about that drawer? 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 Well, its not out here. Is there any chance it could be in youroffice?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	  Yknow, I dont-I dont know. Let me, let mecheck. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	  Any luck?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Can I see you in my office for a minute?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	  Yeah?  You found them!!  Yknow what? Im not even going to gloat. Im justreally relived this whole thing is over.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 You put these on my desk!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 I did not!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	 Oh really? So youre saying they just slid out of yourbottom drawer, crawled across the floor, then jumped on to my desk?! 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Tag	 How did you know they were in my bottom drawer?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Rachel	  Iam so hot for you right now.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Oh my God! How did you get back here?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	A Disembodied Voice	  Phoebe Buffay?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	  Fire alarm?  Oh! Hi, officerfireman, can-can I help you?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	The Fireman	 We found your fire alarm in the trash chute.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Thats not mine.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	The Fireman	 Yes it is.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 How do you know?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	The Fireman	 The next time you want to dump a fire alarm in a trash chute,dont wrap it in a blanket that says, "Property of Phoebe Buffay notMonica."
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Okay do youOkay, do you have a search warrant? Because the lasttime I checked this was still America!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	The Fireman	 Please reattach this, its against the law to disconnect them.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Fine!  But please God; tell me how to stop themfrom going off!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	The Fireman	 Theres a reset button under the plastic cover.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Phoebe	 Theres a reset button?! Ugh, thank you! Thank you!  Theres a reset button! My God! Why didnt I see that! Reset button, reset button,where is there a reset button?  Oh here it is! Oh!  Ohh,God!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay, do-do you have a good grip?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Yeah!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay, Im going to start climb down you now.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 All right! Just hurry up!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay. Now-now-now should I climb down your front so were face toface or-or should I climb down your back so were-were butt to face.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 I think face to face.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 I would say that.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Face to face, yeah!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Okay, here I go.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 All right. 
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Oh my How much do you weigh Ross?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a littleholiday weight.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think wethought it all the way through.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 So what do you want me to do?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Well, just shimmy down me and drop!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Hi.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Hi.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	  M-maybe I should hang and you can climb down me.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	  Yeah? Maybe we should talk about that for a little while!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Its still looks pretty far!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Its not that far! Just drop!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Do not rush me!!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Joey	 Ross, you should know that my pants are startin to come down andIm not wearing any underwear!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Ross	 Oww!! My ankle! I really hurt my ankle! I think I twisted it whenIOoh, a quarter!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 That really was some of your best work.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Hm-hmm, I told you!  I cant believe thatIve only got two hours before I call in sick for work.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 I have to be up in seven minutes.
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Well, youre not gonna believe this, but if you have sevenminutes
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Really?!
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Chandler	 Do you wanna?
07	12	0712	The One Where They're Up All Night	Monica	 Okay! You get the vacuum cleaner and Ill get the furniture polish!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Hey.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Hey.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 What are you doing?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Well, yknow I was thinking of moving the couch over here.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Why would you want to do that?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 So that there will be a decent place for me to sit.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Rach, there is a decent place to
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 And your lap does not count! Okay? Come on help me move this.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 No. No. No.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 No?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 No. Rosita does not move.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Im sorry, Rosita? As in
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 As in Rosita does not move.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Joey, its just a chair! Whats the big deal?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 The big deal is that it is the exact equal distance from the bathroom tothe kitchen and its at the perfect angle so you dont get any glare coming ofoff Stevie.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Stevie the TV?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Is there a problem?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 No! Oh what does he know! Come on Rosita, us chichas got to stick together!  You bitch!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Hey, yknow whats weird? After you guys get married, when youintroduce me to people youre gonna have to say, "This is my brother-in-lawRoss." Not, "My friend Ross," "brother-in-law Ross." Thatsweird isnt it?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Couldnt I just say, "This is Ross?"
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  Sure, do whatever you want.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Hey Ross! So, I was checking out theuh, real estate section
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Yeah?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Look at this. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Oh, it looks like mom and dads house. Oh, it even has a tree with abroken limb out front and the uh, the window in the attic isOh my God!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 What? What happened to the window in the attic?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 I cant believe mom and dad are selling the house!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 I cant believe they-they didnt even tell us!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 I cant believe I still dont know what happened to the windowin the attic!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  Uh, hello dad! Monica and I just saw the house in the paper! Yes were surprised!  Who did you leave a message with?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	  Sorry! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Joey, Joey I am so sorry.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 I told you not to move it! Rach, how would you feel if say, I wanted tomove you mom, and you said dont, and I did it anyway and her head fell off?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Okay, come onJoey, Ill buy you a new one! All right?Well go down to the store right now and well-well get you a new chair.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Shes not even cold yet!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 But dont you think Rosita wouldve wanted you to move on? Imean yknow, she did always putyour comfort first.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Thats true.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	  Okay? You ready?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Yeah, I  I dont want Stevie to see her likethis.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 I cant believe we have to say goodbye to the house we grew up in.Man, some-some strangers gonna be living in my room.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Well, after 15 years of mom and dad keeping it as a shrine to you,its time the velvet ropes came down.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 They kept your room for a while.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Oh please! Dad turned my room into a gym 20 minutes after I moved out! Igotta say, a tanning bed and a stack of Victorias Secret catalogues, not agym!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Come on, you know they love you.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 As much as they love you?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 I was their first born! They thought she was barren! Its not myfault.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	  Hey.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Hey.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Ugh, I hate this year!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Whats wrong with this year?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Well okay, its already February and Ive only given twomassages and they were both the worst tippers in the world!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 That was me and Ross.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh thats right!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Hey, yknow if you want to pick up some extra cash? Some friends ofmine made good money doing telemarketing.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Oh thats a great idea. Youre really good on the phone.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah and yeah, and it would probably be better than the last telephonejob I had. Yknow, I probably wouldnt have to say spank as much.  
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 What?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, like you never called!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 So basically this is very easy. You read from the script and try tosell as much toner as you possibly can.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Okay, I can do that! Oh, by the way, I love my office.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	  Why dont we do a trial run.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh okay. Umm, all right.  Hi, this is Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak to your supplymanager please?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 Im the supply manager.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Umm, okay I would like to talk to you about your toner needs.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 We dont need any toner.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh okay, well Im sorry to bother you. Bye-bye.  Yeah youre right, this is easy.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 Okay, what was wrong with that call?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh well, all rightum, no offense, but you were kind of rude.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 Theyre always going to tell you they dont need toner,but thats okay because whatever they say, you can find the answer to it here in thisscript.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	 So, I think youre ready to sell toner, do you have any lastquestions?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No.  Oh wait yes! I do, I do have one question. What is toner?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Joey! Joe!  Full bag.  Beers still cold.Something terrible mustve happened here!  Ohno-no-no-no-no-no!  Stevie, I was never here! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Dad?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Im here!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Hi. God, it seems like just yesterday you guys used to come out towatch me work.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Dad, we-we cant believe youre selling the house.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, its time for a new family to start their memories hereand hopefully their check will clear before they find the crack in the foundation and theasbestos in the ceiling.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  Lets grab our stuff and get the hell out of here.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Im sorry we cant store your childhood things anymore.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Oh, thats okay, I cant wait to see everything again! All ofthe memories
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, I dont know whats in the boxes down here, but I doknow there are six or seven Easy Bake Ovens in the attic.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 I used to love to play restaurant.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Yeah, not as much as you used to love to play uncooked batter eater.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Hey, it is unreasonable to expect a child to wait for a lightbulb to cook brownies! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 So, I think youre boxes are over here. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Wow! Great!  Wait, dad who-whoscigarettes are these?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 I dont know. They-they must be your mothers, but please,please dont ask her. Ill throw these away. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Cool! Dad! My report cards! Hey, check this out dad, Math, A. Science, A. History, A. GymOooh, my rock polisher!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Oh look, look theres your old makeup kit!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Its a clown kit! Clown kit!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, the white seems to be untouched.  Uh-oh.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 What?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Yknow how the garage floods every Spring?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 How are you ever going to sell this place?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 I think I accidentally used Monicas boxes to keep the wateraway from the Porsche.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Oh no. Dad! Dad! What Oh Godeverythings ruined! Dad, shes gonna be crushed!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 You dont secretly smoke do you?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 No!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 So its just your mother then.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	  Hi, this Phoebe from Empire Office Supplies, can I speak toyour supply manager please?  Earl, thanks.  Hi Earl, this is Phoebe fromEmpire Office Supplies Id like to talk to you about your toner needs. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 I dont need any toner.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Im hearing what youre saying, but at our prices everyoneneeds toner.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Not me.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 May I ask why?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 You wanna know why. You wanna know why?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 I surely do!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Okay, I dont need any toner because Im going to kill myself.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	  Umm, is-is that because youre out oftoner?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Okay, sono toner today. Thanks anyway, bye-bye.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No-no wait-wait! I cant just let you hang up! Just please talk tome.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 WellI only have one thing to do today.  I guess I could push itback.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah! Now, why do you want to kill yourself?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Its just that I uh, have been working for ten years now at thismeaningless, dead-end job and nobody here even knows I exist!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Chandler?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 I-Im sorry?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No look, I-Im sure that people know you exist!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Oh yeah? I work in a cubicle surrounded by people. Ive been talkingto you for five minutes now about killing myself and no ones even looked up fromtheir desk. Hang-hang on.  Hey everybody! Uh,Im gonna kill myself!  Illget back to ya.  I got nothing. Wait.  Uh, hey Marge!  Ehh, nothing. Nothing.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 My chair. Now, if anybody asks, your name is Rosita! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 You will like it!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 No I wont.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 You dont even know!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Because, I know what I like and what I dont like! Its not thesame thing!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Well look, if you dont like this
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 I dont know why you say that so soon.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! The most expensive one inthe store! Hey, yknow what I was thinking? We could name her Francette.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Francette? What is she? A couch?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Poor thing. Cut down in her prime.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Joey, the new chair will be here in an hour. Maybe we should actuallymove Rosita out of here. Yknow, start the heeling process?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Well, I guess youre right. Maybe, maybe Ill take her down tothe incinerator. Its gonna be so said, and kinda cool.  Shes heeled!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Thats weird.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 No its not weird, its a miracle!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Its not a miracle Joey! Im sure theres someexplanation.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Oh there is! If you want something enough and your heart is pure, wondrousthings can happen!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Joey, I really dont
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Can you tell me how this happened?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Well no.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Miracle!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 No, yknow what? Maybe somebody came in here and fixed it! Orsomething!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Someone like anangel?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Thats right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Get your non-believer ass outta my chair! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, shell understand right? Its not like I did it onpurpose.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Dad that wont matter to her. Look, all my stuff is safe and dry andall her is-is, is growing new stuff! See, this is exactly the kind of thing that makes herthink you guys love me more than you love her.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Oh my God, does she really thinks that?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Well, can you blame her?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well I dont know, I-I suppose we may have favored youunconsciously, you were a medical marvel! The doctor said your mother could
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Dad, dad I dont want to hear about it.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Really?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Well, not right now. Okay look, Monica came here for some memories anddamnit, were gonna give her some! Okay, grabgrab some empty boxes. Okay?Well-well take stuff from mine and whatever we can pass off as herswell-well put em in their. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Great!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Like uh yknow like this! This!  She-she couldve made this!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Sure!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Right? And this!  She-she couldve won this!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	  This couldve been hers!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Sure! Ooh-ooh, what about this?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Your make-up kit? Id feel better.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	  I am so psyched I keptthis chair for myself!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Yeah, me too. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Hey, howshows the uh, miracle chair?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Fine.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Yeah? Wow! Yknow, that this thing has speakers in the headrest!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 No. Really?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Yeah! You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  My chair heels itself.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Earl, youre not hearing me! All Im saying is thatyoure not alone all right? Everybody hates the people they work with! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Guy	  Hey guy!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Wait, what was that? That sounded like someone being nice to you.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 No! Thats just the "Hey Guy" guy. He says that toeverybody! Hes the worst! Id like to take him with me!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 All right so Earl, lets just forget about the people at theoffice, okay? There-theres gotta be someone else in your life worth sticking aroundfor! What about-what about your family, your friends, or maybe your girlfriend?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	  Yeah! Right!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh sorry, boyfriend!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Oh no.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No, whatever! Anything!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	The "Hey Guy" Guy	 Hey guy!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, hes gotta go.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Okay, I should, I should probably be getting back to my thing now. See ya.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No! Im not finished yet! Dont! Dont you dare hang upon me!!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Supervisor	   The newgirls good.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Hey guys! Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Hey.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Hey, I just whipped us up some Easy Bake treats, they should beready in about three days.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	  Thats a good one! Do you hear that Ross? Threedays!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  Yeah! Yeah!  Oh, this will make a greatmemory.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Okay. So, which boxes are mine?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Well, these. These are yours right here. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Okay.  Oh! A coloring book! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Yeah. Yeah, oh you loved that thing. You always had it with you. You neverwent anywhere without-without that coloring book.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Really? Wow! It looks like I had some troublestaying inside the lines.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Nu-uh! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Oh, an old glove?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Oh, yeah you loved that glove! You took it every place you went. Younever went any place without that glove.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Wow! Look at this!  I cant believe I even fitinto this shirt!   Oh, this is yours. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Oh, I dont know how that got in there.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  This isnt mine.  Hey, this isnt, this isnt my stuff! Ugh,Ross!  These are your boxes! Where are my boxes?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Umm, your boxes are umm
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 What?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Dad?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, the garage flooded sweetie and it ruined everything in yourboxes. Im sorry.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Just mine?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Im afraid so.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 So why-why wasnt Rosss stuff ruined?  And if you saythe words medical marvel Im going to Easy Bake your head!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Well, I used your boxes to divert water away from the Porsche.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 So wait, Rosss stuff is fine, but I have no memories because youwanted to keep the bottom two inches of your car away from water!!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 There was also leaves and guk and stuff.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 I cant believe this! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	  Screw it! Im having one. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Hey Chandler!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rollingmassage, and speakers in the head rest?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, Id love to but Ive tried that so many times theywont even let me in the store anymore.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Well what if I told you, you can do it in my apartment?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	  Are you telling me that you bought the chair that ismaking all other lounge systems obsolete? The chair that Sit magazine called the Chair ofthe Year?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 I just purchased the La-Z-Boy E-cliner 3000. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Thats awesome! Thats great! What made you do it?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Well, its a long story, but umm I broke Joeys chair
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! You broke Joeys chair?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 I thought I broke Joeys chair! Thats why I replacedit with mine!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Ohhhhh. Thats how it got fixed!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Well, what did you think, that-that elves came in and fixed it?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Noo!  Angels.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Im gettin my chair back! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 What? Wh-hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Well, it looks like it wasnt heeled after all! Yeah! So, I guessthis chair is mine now! 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Joey you broke my chair!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Your chair?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Yeah, he thought he broke your chair so he switched the chairs!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 So, there was no miracle?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 No Joe, no miracle.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	  Oh no this is devastating! My faith is shaken. Im soglad I have the new chair to get my through this difficult time in my life.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Uh-huh! Nice try, but you dont get that chair anymore! All right?That is my chair now! You can sit on my lap!  No I take that back!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 I think I should get the chair!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 How do you figure?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Because you  broke a chair and you  broke a chair! The only one around here that hasnt broke a chair, is me!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 No-no-no! This chairs not going anywhere.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 Well, wheres the logic in that?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough tobreak a chair in half!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 So Joey breaks my chair and I get nothing!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Thats right!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Chandler	 What are you guys? Like a gang or something?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Yeah! We are!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Were the Cobras!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	  Excuse me! Can you tell me where I can find Earl? Hesthe supply manager around here.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Marge	 Sorry, I dont know any Earl.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	  Im right here!!!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	  Earl! Im Phoebe.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Phoebe? The lady who sells toner?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Umm, look it, you-you cant kill yourself.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	  Look, um I really appreciate your coming down
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No-no I cant! I cant let you do it!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Why?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Because it was fate that made me call you today!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 I thought it was toner.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No! Think about it okay? This isnt even my regular job!Okay? And my first day on the job, youre my first call! And-and somebody elsemightve hung up on you, but I wouldnt do that because I know about this stuff.My mom killed herself.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Really?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Yes.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 How?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Im not gonna give you tips! Look dont you see thatthis-thisthis all came together so that I could stop you from doing this.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Couldnt it just be a coincidence?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 No, its fate!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 It doesnt really seem like enough to be fate.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh. Well umm, okay heres a weird thing. My mother was also asupply manager.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Im actually the office manager.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh my God! So was she! And! Get this, okay? Your-your name is Earl,right? Her name was Pearl, P-Earl.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Well, was there anything else?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Sure!  Umm, where are you from?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Philadelphia.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Oh my God! So was she! Oh, Ive got-Ive got goose bumps. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	  Really?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Well, yknow Im wearing layers and its warm.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Yeah-yeah.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 But ifno look, okay. These jerks might not care about you, but theuniverse does! And that says a lot!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	  Did you hear that?! I dont need you guys to care about me!Because the universe cares! The whole universe!   I really wished theyd care just a little bit though.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Phoebe	 Yknow, I dont-I dont think its you. This is afreaky place.  Hey! Guys!   Oh no, its you.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Earl	 Yeah.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Oh, this terrible! Everything is destroyed! Look at this.  It obviously meant enough for me to save it, and Idont even know what it is! Ohh, its still soft.  What do you think this is?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 All right. I think it was a mouse.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	  How are you honey?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 How do you think I am?! Youve wrecked all my childhood memories.You love Ross more than me. And I just rubbed a dead mouse on my face!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Sweetheart, we love you just as much as Ross! Now, Im sorryabout everything that happened and Id probably never be able to make it up to you,but heres a start. 
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Whats this?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Its the key to my Porsche. Well, the key to your Porsche.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  What?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	  What?!!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	 Ive been thinking about getting rid of it. I was driving itthe other day and saw my reflection in a store window. Your mothers right, I dolook like an ass.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Wait, youre giving me your Porsche, youre kidding meright?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Well w-w-w-w-wait, w-wait, wait, wait a minute! I mean a couple of stupidboxes get wet and she gets a Porsche?!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Mr. Geller	  Why dont we take it for a spin?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 All right!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Ross	 Well, what about me?! Im a medical marvel!!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Oh yeah.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Ahhhh.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Ahhh  Eh?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	  Hey guys!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Joey	 Hey!
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Do you guys know what happened to Chandlers barca lounger?
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Rachel	 Oh yeah, Joey broke it. Had to get rid of it.
07	13	0713	The One Where Rosita Dies	Monica	 Are you kidding?! I get a Porsche and the barca loungersgone?! This is the best day ever! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Happy birthday!!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Happy birthday!!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	All	 Rach! Come on! Rach!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Its your birthday!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	  Hey.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Shes not as pretty as she was when she was 29.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Ms. Green would like to establish some ground rules before she comes out.She would appreciate it if you dont use the words old or downhill or  theystill look pretty damn good. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 They do!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Rachel! Come on out! Monica made breakfast!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Chocolate-chip pancakes!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Weve got presents!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Good ones?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 They all came from the list you handed out to us two weeks ago.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Well, can I keep the presents and still be 29?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Come on Rach! Look, turning thirty is not that big a deal.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Oh really. Is that how you felt when you turned thirty?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	  Why God?!! Why?!! We had a deal!! Let the others grow old! Notme!! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Yknow, Im still 29 in Guam.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Hey, 30 is not that old! Do you know how old the Earth is?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Late thirties? Oh come on you guys! Is it just me? Am I overreacting tothis?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 No Rach, its not just you. My thirtieth birthday certainlywasnt that much fun.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	  And now Chandler! Were all gettin so old!  Why are you doing this to us?! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Rach, youre in a great place in your life. Come on, youvegot a great job! Good friends
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Yeah, youre roommate is a soap opera star.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Look, yknow I know my lifes going pretty well, but I lookaround and I just see so many people whove accomplished so many other goals by thetime theyre thirty.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Yeah, but you shouldnt compare yourself to me.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	All	 Come on Phoebe! You can do it Phoebe! Come on!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 There you go!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 I did it! One mile on a hippity-hop! Thats it!! Thatseverything I wanted to do before I was thirty. Oh, except I wanted to patch things up withmy sister. But oh well. Yay!!  And-and girls this thing is aGodsend if you know what I mean. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Thirty. Ugh, I mean thirty! Monica, do you remember mean, old Mrs.Kreeger in the fifth grade? She was thirty!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Come on, lets have some fun. Huh?  What do you want to dotoday?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Nothing. I dont want to do anything.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Well, doing nothing on your thirtieth is better than doing somethingstupid, like Ross.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Hey! That was a practical purchase! I needed that car for transportation!Okay? I-I have a child!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 How hot do I look in this, huh?!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Ross, a sports car? Wouldnt it have been cheaper to just stuff asock down there?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Thats not what this is about okay? I-I am a sports car enthusiast. Ihave always been into cars.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Hey, whats the horsepower on this thing?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	  I dont know, but-but look how shiny!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 I cant believe you bought this.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Really! God Ross, what were you thinking?  I knowits really shallow, but a part of me wants him again.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Oh, well get in line missy.  So, can I have a ride stud?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Hop in.  Get ready for the smoothest ride of your life. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Damnit! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Okay, whos next?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Yknow what? I am going to do something today. Im not justgonna sit around like some old lady. Im gonna get something pierced. Like my uh,like my nose or my tongue or something.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Really?! Cause yknow that hurts.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 So what?! Yknow what? The way I see itOw! Son of a bitch!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Look Rachel, I know what youre going through. Im totallyfreaked about turning 25.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  Get out, get out of my apartment. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 All right Rach, for what its worth, I think that youre doinggreat. I mean yknow lets face it, no one handles this well.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Least of all you.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Why? What youd do?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Werent you asked to leave sonny?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Would you put that back on?! Monicas gonna be here anyminute!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 But it hurts my Joeys Apple.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Okay, for the last time. Its not named for eachindividual man.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mrs. Geller	  Youve done a wonderful job with this partyChandler. Everything looks so lovely.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Oh well, not as lovely as you. I mean, I cant believe that youwould have a thirty-year-old daughter!  And you! I cant believe thatyou would have a tux thats thirty years old! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mr. Geller	 Its older than that. Ross was actually conceived right nearthis tuxedo.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Ohh! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  Hey! Everybody hide! Hide! I saw her! Shes coming!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay! Okay! Everybody down! Everybody down! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mr. Geller	 Crap.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Okay, everybody stay here. I will find outwhats going on.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Heyyy!! You got the door open!! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Hey-hey are you drunk?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Nooo!  Okay.  Whoa!  Okay. See I was, I was alittle nervous about turning  thirty.  So the bus boys took me outfor some drinks.  I wanna puke on you later!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay, here is the thing. We have thrown a very formal surpriseparty for you in there! All of your friends are in there and your parents!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Noo!!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Yes!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Noo!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Yes!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Oh no! My parents have never seen me drunk!  That they know of.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay, heres the thing. Were gonna get you some coffee andthey will never know that youre drunk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Really?! You promise?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Yeah, Ill take care of it.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Okay. I love you so much. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Okay we have to do something about your breath.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 What about your breath?! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Thats still yours. Okay, now remember its a surpriseparty. So, when you go in, act surprised.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Okay. I can do that.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	All	 Surprise!!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Okay, forward. ForwardStop!  Okay, backStop!  Okay, forwardStop! Stop! Stop!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Ross, just forget about it. This guys got you totally wedged in.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Woman	  Is this yours?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Well actually
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 No-no-no! Its mine! Its-its mine. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Dude, you soooo need this car.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Okay. Okay, heres what were gonna do. Okay,Im gonna break into this mini-van and put it in neutral. You guys push it forward soRoss can drive out of his spot. Okay? All right, here we go.  Haul ass!!!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Happy thirtieth birthday! Here!  Itsfor the child in you, and the woman. Happy thirtieth!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Right, why do you keep saying that?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Because its our thirtieth birthday.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yeah, no were not thirty. Were 31. Okay. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Wait! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Oh, its you.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Yeah. What?!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yeah, were not thirty, were 31.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Nu-uh!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yea-huh! Thats what is says on my birth certificate.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 You have your birth certificate?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yeah, I got a big box of family stuff when my mom died.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Our mom.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	  Right! Okay. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Do you have my birth certificate?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 No, I sold it to a Swedish runaway.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Oh my God! Oh my God, we are 31.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yeah.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 I just lost a whole year of my life.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	  Okay.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Your middle name is Pamela?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yes.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Well, I never knew mine. Do you remember what it is?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Yes! Phoebe.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Thats my first name.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ursula	 Right, okay, then no.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay before we start the celebration, Monica has to go put on herparty dress.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Yay!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 See?  Here we go. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mr. Geller	 Happy birthday, sweetie! Give us a hug! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mrs. Geller	  Dont get up Jack! The safety pins are about toblow.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	  Paul!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Phil.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Phil!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Now, there is a dress laid out on your bed.  Okay,  youre doing great. Youre doing great. Youredoing fine.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Hey, whats going on?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Monicas a little drunk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Yay! I love drunk Monica!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Awwwww 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Go change!  She doesnt want her parentsto know shes drunk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Ohh! All right! All right. Heres what well do, Ill gettwice as drunk as Monica and then no ones will even notice her.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Whats-whats going on? Phils really pissed!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Monicas wasted.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Maybe that will liven up this party.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Okay, will you just go help her change please!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Yep. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	  This ones from me.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Ahh!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 It wasnt on your list, but hopefully youll think itsreally fun.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  A scooter! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	  Stick to the list. Always stick to the list.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 No! No-no, I love it. Thank you.  
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay, open ours next. Open ours next!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Okay.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Now that youre a couple, we dont get two presents from youguys?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 For my last birthday you gave me a hug!  Okay, readthe card! Read the card!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Okay.  Happy birthday Grandma! Itsbetter to be over the hill  then buried under it.  All our love Monica and Chandler.  Thats funny,yeah!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 No-no-no-no! That was the joke!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  No, I know! I get it! Its funny!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 No, because youre not a grandmother!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and havechildren and I dont have any of those things. Thats why its so funny.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 All you had to do was buy the card!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Hey! Look whos back! Its the birthday girl! Hows thebirthday girl feeling?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Well, I feel fine, but I think youre bumming out the rest of thekids.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 What? 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Okay! Yknow what? I realized it was stupid to get upset about nothaving a husband and kids. All I really needed was a plan. See I wanna have threekids
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Oh let me guess, and you wanna have them all at the same time and youwanna have them for your brother.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 As I was saying I should probably have the first of the three kidsby the time Im 35 which gives me five years. I love this plan! I wanna marry thisplan!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 If you could do that, Id marry the hippity-hop.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 So, if I wanna have my kid when Im 35, I dont have to getpregnant until Im 34. Which gives Prada four years to start making maternityclothes! Oh wait, but I do want to be married for a year before I get pregnant
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Really! That long?!   Look all you want, its happening!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 No, so I dont have to get married until Im 33! Thatsthree years, thats three whole yearsOh, wait a minute though. Ill need ayear and a half to plan the wedding, and Id like to know the guy for a year, yearand a half before we get engaged Which means I need to meet the guy by the timeIm thirty.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Which is fine! Because you just turnedtwenty-eight!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 No! Ross, no! It is not fine! Eh-eh-according to my plan I shouldalready be with the guy I wanna marry!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Will you quit hoggin it!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  Im telling you its like watching Bambi learnhow to walk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	  Youre drunk! Mom and dad are gonna be maaaaadd! MaybeIm a little drunk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Oh thats great! Right there! Can we get some ofthat over here please?  There we go.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	  Hey! Are those crab cakes?  Did I nottell ya to come straight to me when more crab cakes were ready?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  How are you feeling?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 You are so handsome! I wanna make love to you right here, rightnow! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 I really wish that you wouldnt.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	  Now all you have to do is just get through a little bitmore, okay? Then we can put you in bed, okay? Just smile and dont talk to anyone.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Speech! Speech! Lets hear from thebirthday girl! Huh?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Pheebs!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Dont you see? Everyones looking at me! The plansworking! I didnt even have to take off my top yet!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mrs. Geller	 Speech! Come on Monica!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Come on!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	All	 Come on! Speech!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mr. Geller	  Hey Chandler, you cant keep your hands off herfor one second!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Mrs. Geller	 Oh-ho, I think its nice.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 I think its necessary. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 I-I-I wanna thank you all for coming. My family and my friends
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Wooo!! Hoo!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 I really like to say that Im-um  Yknow whatId really like to say? Im drunk!! Thats right mom and dad your little Harmonica is hammered!!  And guess what! Ive been drunk before! And Ivesmoked a cigarette! And I got a box of Ding-Dongs hidden in my underwear drawer!Its all okay. Its okay because I turned thirty today. And, and I can doanything I want! Because I am a grown up. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	  Okay quick, help me get this off! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Yeah!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 I lost a whole year! I cant believe it! This is so unfair!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Oh, I dont know Pheebs. Itll be okay.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Will it? Will it?! I mean, how would you feel if you found out you were31?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Thats not gonna happen. No.  Because we have a new deal!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Plus, it totally ruined my schedule! II havent done any ofthe things I wanted to do by the time I was 31!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Like what?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Like okay I-I-I, I havent met any Portuguese people! I, Ihavent had the perfect kiss! And I havent been to snipers school!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Phoebe, yknow why dont we just go upstairs and have somebirthday cake?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 No, I just feel like being by myself for a while. All right? Illsee you guys later. Thanks. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Hey.  Oh, poor Pheebs.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Hey, yknow what you guys? I think Im gonna go walk her home. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Oh man!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 What?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Monica	 Hes gonna eat the cake!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Pheebs! Wait up!  Listen uh, close your eyes.  Maybe thats one thing you can cross off your list.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Oh yeah.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Oh, and plus Im 1/16th Portuguese.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 Oh! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Okay, is everybody clear? Were gonna pick it upand move it.Now all we need is teamwork, okay? Were gonna lift the carand slide itout. Lift and slide!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Ross, I really dont think
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	  Lift!! And slide!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Okay, here we go.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 All right everyone, lift!  And slide!! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Hey Joey, can I
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Oh, come on Rach! My turn just started!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Actually, I just wanna talk to Tag.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Oh. Okay. Hey, can I ride this outside?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Whatever! Okay, Im not your mother.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Okay! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Not in the street!!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 Yes!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	  Hi.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Hey.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Hey.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 How are you doing? Are you feeling any better?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Yeah, Im doing okay. Im umlets talk.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Okay. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Umm
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Whats up?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Ohh Tag, ummyoure such a great guy and we have sooo much funtogether but I dont-I dont
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Wait! I think I see where youre going, but before you say anythingelse, can I just say one more thing? 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Well said. And a uh good example of the fun I was referring to uhh, butI just think Im past the point where I think I can yknow, just have fun.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Rachel, dont do this. This is just because youre turningthirty.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Yeah, it is! But youre just a kid! I mean youre 25!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Twenty-four actually.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Oh God! Yknow what I wish? I wish you were six years older. Wellactually, if Im wishin for stuff, I actually wish I was six years younger.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Tag	 Me too.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Yeah, Im sorry. 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Hey! Howd it go?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Rachel	 Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Phoebe	 You did the right thing.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	  I dont like this anymore.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Chandler	 Well, here we are, just a bunch of thirty year olds.
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 God, do you realize in ten years were gonna be 40?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	  Why God?! Why are you doing this to us?! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 Yes! My babys finally free! 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 All-all right!  Start it up! Lets go!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	  Woohoo!
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	The Man In The Sportscar	 How hot are we? 
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Ross	 You wanna buy a car?
07	14	0714	The One Where They All Turn Thirty	Joey	 No.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Im glad youre here, we have a couple of things to ask youabout the wedding ceremony.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  Ohh
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Whats the matter? You okay?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Yeah, its just yknow
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	  Monica said wedding.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Uh, so anyway, we thought one of you could read something during theceremony.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh! I would love to read a poem.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Do you think you could get through a poem?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  Itll be a short one.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Okay, so Ross will be doing the reading.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Ohhh
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Okay. Yeah, I guess, I guess I could do that too.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Too?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Yeah, I kind of uh, have something else planned for you guys.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Do you mind telling us what it is?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Sorry, Im kinda keeping this one on the Q.T.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Well, whatever it is, I hope it involves winking. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Hey!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	All	 Hey!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 So I just talked to one of the DOOL writers today, and
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 What is DOOL?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Days Of Our Lives. Anyway, youre not gonna believe it! Mycharacter is coming out of his coma!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	All	 Oh!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Thats great!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 And-and-and not only that, Im gettin a new brain!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 So great things are happening at work and in your personallife!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Wait, what do you mean youre getting a new brain?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh well, theyre killing off one of the characters on the show, andwhen she dies her brain is being transplanted into my body.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 What? A brain transplant?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Yes, its a highly controversial procedure.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Its ridiculous!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Well, I think its ridiculous that you havent had sex in threeand a half months.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	  Its winter, they are fewer people on thestreet. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Who are they killing off?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Uh Cecilia Monroe, she plays Jessica Lockhart.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel, Monica	 Noo!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Shes my favorite character on DOOL.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Nice.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 She is so good at throwing drinks in peoples faces, I mean Idont think Ive ever seen her finish a beverage.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 And the way she slaps all the time!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Wouldnt you love to do it just once?! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Dont do it.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Cecilia Monroe man, what a great actress.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh, tell me about it. And shes been on the show forever, itsgonna be really hard to fill her shoes.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Yeah-yeah, help me out here, when you come out of the "braintransplant," you are going to be her?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Yes, but in Drake Remorays body.  Why isthis so hard for you to get? I thought you were a scientist!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Rach, so, that guy there. Straight or gay?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  Well, I'd have to say gay.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Yeah? Why?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Well mainly because he's kissing that other guy.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Oh no not that guy there. That guy right there. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh yeah he's too cute to be straight.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Ohh knockers will help usfigure it out. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 All right, straight, and not subtle. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Ohh, he left his cell phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh, well, we can hand it to Gunther and he'll put it in lost and found.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Or we could use it to call China. See how those guys are doing.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 What if, um, if he calls his own cell phone to find out who found it andI answer and we start talking and we fell in love. I mean wouldn't that be a great story?Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Yeah That does sound great. I'm going to get the phone. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 What? Wait! Whywhy do you get the story?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 I don't know. I haven't been out on a date in so long.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Phoebe, you had a date three days ago.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 That wasnt a date! That was, that was just friends gettingtogether having sex.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Okay. Okay, see? I get the phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 No way! No way! You just broke with Tag a week ago.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Yeah!  And until now, I didnt think Id loveagain.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Nice try.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh hey-hey wait! How do we fairly decide who gets the phone?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 I dont know. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Well umm, maybe we could uhh  Ah-ha! Too slow!! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Ah-ha! Too cocky!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 Im going to keep dating him Mother, and theres nothing you cando about it!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Jessica Lockhart	 Oh yes there is!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 What are you going to do? Kill him? Like you did with Charles?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Jessica Lockhart	  That was an accident! And so were you.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 Well, at least Im not a murderer! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Jessica Lockhart	  Oh, my baby! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	The Director	 Cut!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 That was a great scene! And-and-and that slap looks so real! How do you dothat?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh, just years of experience.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	  Can I get some ice here?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh anyway, I just wanted to say how wonderful I think you are.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Youre not the fan whos dying are you?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Say what?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Im supposed to meet and hug a fan whose dying, but thatsnot supposed to be until  later!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 No. No, Im Joey Tribbiani; we did a scene together yesterday.I-Im the guy in the coma!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh that was a real person?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 An-an-anyway I-I just wanted to say that since Im getting your brainwhen you leave the show, I was wondering if there was any tips you can give me
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 I-I-Im leaving the show?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  I dont know. Why? Did you hear something?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Who told you that?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh uh, one of the writers.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Which one? Was it bald or was it tall?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Umm
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Yknow what? It doesnt matter! Because it is not true!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Okay.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 And if it were true, how dare you come to me ask me for tipsabout a character that Ive been playing for 20 yearsIll give you a tip!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Ms. Monroe  Oh there you go. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 No Phoebe! You cannot get the phone that way; thats not fair! Okaylook, I have an idea. Why dont we, why dont we see what kind of number he hason his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. Andthen whoever does gets the phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Or, we can decide by whose ever name is closer to the word phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 I dont think so.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Fine all right, but Id bet youdbe singing another tune if we were fighting over a ratchet.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  All right, first name on the speed dial ismom.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Ohh, I lost my mom to suicide.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Okay no way, you cannot use that to get the cute guy and the lastblueberry muffin.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Did I use that already today? Im sorry.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Yes okay.  Well now see this isnttelling us anything.  Joe. Carlos. Peter. Ooh! Peter Luger! Thats a steak house!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Okay, a meat eater. Fine, thats one for you.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  Oh, I win! Hes got Barneyson his speed dial.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 So you dont know thats Barneys the store! Thatcan be yknow his friends house, or a bar. Who has Barneys thestore on their speed dial?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  His new girlfriend!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 What is that?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 I think its the dying cat parade.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 It sounds like its coming from across the street.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	  Oh my God!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 What?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Yknow that thing that Ross was gonna do at our wedding?! He washanging out with me yesterday and he turned to me and said, "Youre halfScottish right?"
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Nooo!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Yes!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 No, there is no way! It can not be Ross!  Unbelievable! Whyis your family Scottish?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Why is your family Ross?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 He cannot play at our wedding! I mean everyone will leave! I mean comeon, that is just noise! Its not even a song!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 If you listen very carefully, I think its Celebration by Cooland the Gang.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Hi Pheebs!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Hi!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 How are ya?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Good.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Umm Pheebs, remember when we were in the coffee house we decided that Iwas going to keep the uh, the cute guys cell phone?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Yeah.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 And remember how I said I was going to keep it in my purse so that if itrang I could just pick it up?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Yeah!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 And do you remember going into my purse and stealing the phone?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Ooh, now you lost me.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 You stole the phone!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 No I didnt!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 No? So youre saying that if I called it, it wouldnt ring?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 No.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Umm, okay. But while you dial, let me show you the features of my newringing handbag.  Oh, itdoes work! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Phoebe!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 That is a different phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh is it?!  Uhh, hello?  Yes hi, is Rachel there?  Yes she is, just one moment please. Its for me!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 That is damning evidence.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh my God! I bet thats him. My digital fairy tale is about tobegin. I wonder how I should be? Should I be uh  Hello? Or should I be Hi! Its Rach  Would you stop doing that?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Hello?  Yes, Im the one who found your phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Phoebe! You cant do th
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Shhh! Im on a call!  Umm well yeah, you canpick it up tonight, say 8:30? At-at my apartment. Its umm, its umm 5 MortonStreet, Apartment 14, umm and then maybe yknow after we can grab a bite to eat orwhatever.  Okay, well okay Ill see you then.  Bye. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 You do know that I will be here when he comes over.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Oh? And how will you know what time to come over?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 You just said it!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Oh. Okay, well I-I was kinda hoping that I would justbe aloneyknow to think about my mom and her suicide.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh Phoebe!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 What?! Thats the first time today!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Ohh! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 So you like the nachos uh? Myself Im partial to
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	  Im 16.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 See you in 2003. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	  Youre absolutely right they are writing me out ofthe show. They dont know exactly when its going to happen, but apparentlygoing to be very soon and thats it.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Im so sorry. Look, if it was up to me you would never leave theshow.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Yeah, thanks.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 No I mean it! I cant believe they would do this to you! And to yourfans! I mean they are going to be devastated! Heart broken! They love you so much!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh youre right. Thank you! Whats your name again?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Joey.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Joey, well thank you. That is so sweet. Oh, excuse me. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	The Writer	 It wasnt my decision!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	  Im having a conversation here!  You weresaying?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Uh yeah-ye-ye-ye-ye-yel-l-l-l-l-look the-the-the only reason that I,that I came up to you before was because well, Im really nervous about-about beingyou. Yknow if you can help me capture the essence of the character. Yknow?Help me keep Jessica alive. Please?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 All right Joey, I will help you. Not because I-I owe it to this stupidshow, but because I owe it to Jessica.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh thats great! Oh thank you so much!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Youre so welcome.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Hey! Now, Ive been watching some tapes, hows this?  "Jessica Lockhart will never step foot in this place again!Ever!!"
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Is that supposed to be me?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Yeah.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Yeah but Jessica doesnt have an English accent.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  I can do an English accent?! That babys going on myresume!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Well, I feel like a snack!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Do you want some shortbread? Eh thats Scottish like you are.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Oh no thanks. I dont like any thing from my Scottishheritage.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 What?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Well its just my entire family was run out of ScotlandbyVikings. Anyway, lots of bad memories. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Oh well, it sounds to me like your family is ready to uh, rediscover itsScottish roots.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 No! No-no theyre not. Theyre still very angry! Butyknow Chandler is also half-Swedish. You know what the Swedish people are famousfor? Sitting down and being quiet.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Well yeah-yeah the Scottish history is so much more
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	  You can not play bagpipes at the wedding!!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 How did you know about that?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 We heard you play all the way from your apartment!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Were you the ones called the cops?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Thats not really important right now. What is important is;while we appreciate the gesture, we just dont feel bagpipes are appropriate for ourwedding.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Why not?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 Because we hate them.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 Come on thats not fair! I mean you havent even heard me play!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Chandler	 We have heard you play.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 No, youve heard my practice. Okay? Just-just give me a chance toperform for you and then decide whatever you want. And Im not going to tell you whatsong Im gonna play either. But uh, lets just say when its over Illbet there will be a we bit o celebration.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 So, the essence of the character is rooted in her confidence. So, whenJessica enters a room for instance, she owns everything and every person in that room. You try.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Okay! All right!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 No, he already knows that he owns everything in the room! Hes notfinding it out for the first time! So, try it again.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Okay. Okay. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Right. Hes not angry at the room either. Try it again, he ownsit! He owns the room. It is his. He owns, owns, owns, owns the room! He owns it!! All right, its a little weird, but itsgetting better.  Oh well, Im gonna miss this woman so much. Idont know what Im going to do! I mean, its been 20 years of my life.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh wellHey-hey! Maybe, maybe uh, maybe this is a good thing.Yknow? Itll-itll give you a chance to shake things up, play differentcharacters. Youre so talented.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 I am. I am, but I dont know you know. An actor of a certain ageis not that easy.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Hey thats not true! Look at uh, look at Angela LansbAngelinaJolie!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 I probably shouldve just left years ago when the offers werepouring in, but yknow I just got so comfy here! And Ohh, I turned down someamazing work!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Like-like what?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Well, lets just say if I left 15 years ago, the landscape ofMexican cinema would be very different today!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Wow!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 But Well now, nows a different time for me. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh hey come on, dont-dont-dont do this! Umm, looklet-let me tell you something, okay? Now when I watch you do a scene, Im thinking,"Boy, she-she is a great actress!"  Uh but-but, I amalso thinking, "She is hot!"
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	  You think Im hot?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 You own the room.  Weshould probably get-get uh
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh yeah-yeah, we should get the  So when Jessica kisses aman, she usually puts umm, both her hands on the mans face. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, I noticed that! Is that cause shes so passionate?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 No! Its because that way the camera only sees her!  Do you wanna try it?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Yeah! Okay. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 That was good, that was really good. But I-I think your hands maybe alittle off, they should be maybe right like 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Hey! Hey!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe, Rachel	  Who is it?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Guy	 Hi! Its Tom, Im here to pick up the phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Whoa! Why do you get to answer the door?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Well why shouldnt I?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Because its my apartment!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Well, then I get to give him the cell phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Okay. All right.  Good luck explaining all thecalls to China.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 Hi!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Wow! How long were we arguing for?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  Youre not the man who left the cell phone.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 No thats my assistant.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Is-is he coming? 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 Umm, no.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Could you-could you umm, give us one second?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 Sure!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Well be right back sir.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 Sure.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Wh-what do we do?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 I dont know!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Can you believe this?  We were waiting fora hot guy and then an even hotter one shows up!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 I know!  What?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Hmm, they just dont make em like that anymore!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  No-no they do but, you just have towait.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Rachel, listenI mean, if you let me have him then I will reallyowe you one.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  All right. All right Phoebe I will let you havehim, but you owe me; you owe me big!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Yeah! Youre such a great friend!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Ohh
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 So, which one of you lovely ladies am I going to take to dinner huh?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Oh thatd be me. Sir.  After you.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Tom	 Okay. Okay. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	  Nice!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Well, you certainly own that room.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Actually I rent the whole place and, I just got what you meant. Thank you.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Hi.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Hey!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh my God!! Ohh, Jessica Lockhart!! In my apartment!! I amsuch a huge fan! I am such a huge fan!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Well, its nice to know that you
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	  MONICA!!!! MONICA!!!! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 That uh, that is my roommate Rachel.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh that explains all the womens underwear.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Sure. Yep.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	  Oh my God! Its true!! Oh my God you are soamazing! Oh my God, can I just ask you to do me oh, just one favor?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Certainly.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Would you slap me? Would you slap me right here in the face?! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Id love to, but my lawyer said I cant do that anymore.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 God. You seem really, really nice.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Okay, bye-bye.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 I mean n-not-not fake at all like most famous people.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 All right, here we go. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 Okay.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	  Oh wait, just one more thing! One more minute!  Umm, youre a stupid bitch.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 I really cant slap you. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 You are so beautiful.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica	 Nice to meet you! My God youre great!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Thanks for stopping by. See ya!   I-I am so sorry. I
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Oh no-no-no-no, being adored. Im used to it, dont worryabout it.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Oh my God!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 What?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 They sent me todays script! They never send the script!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 They dont?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Well no, Im just in a coma. This must mean I have lines!  Oh
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 How does it happen?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  Ew, you get thrown from a horse into anelectric fence.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Ah what?! Jessica hates horses!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Yeah well, Im guessing after this shes not going to be crazyabout electricity either.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 now remember you have to imagine me in a kilt.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	   I can imagine you in a short plaid skirt and kneesocks.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	  Do you wanna start telling secrets?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Rachel	 No!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	  Now umm, remember Im still learning.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 One, two, three, four!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 You know the song! Sing along!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 So?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Monica, Chandler	 No!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 Loosening the saddle on mothers horse was brilliant Fredrick. Andthe electric fence, inspired.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Fredrick	 Thank you sweetheart. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 I cant believe shes really gone. Look around you, all of thisis ours. 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	  I dont think so.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Dina	 Who are you?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Jessica Lockhart	 Whats the matter Dina? Dont you recognize your own mother?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	The Director	 Cut! That was great everybody! Thank you!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	  That was so wonderful!  Ohh, I thinkthat youre a better Jessica than I ever was!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Oh noo
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Well of course not, but you were very good.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Thanks!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 And guess what? Good news! I got another job!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Great! Hey! All right! Well-well what is it?!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 A film in Guadalajara!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 The airport?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 No thats La Guardia.  This is Mexico.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Ohh. Wow! Well how-how, how will you be gone?
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Eight months.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Thats a really long time.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 Yeah, but you can come and visit me. I bet that you could uh, own a fewplaces down there.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Well I tell ya, I should probably buy a place in the city first. And I just got what you meant againThat isI tell ya, that is atricky one!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 That is a tricky one. Well, Joey I really wanna thank you. Youve,well you made a very difficult time for me a little less painful.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Joey	 Good luck.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Cecilia	 You too.
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Ross	 You know the song! Sing along!
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Phoebe	 Eeee!!! Eee!! Eee!! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Matthew Perry	 Eee!! 
07	15	0715	The One With Joey's New Brain	Lisa Kudrow	 Do it again!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hi.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Hi! Hi Ben!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Hi.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hi, we have a little bathroom emergency.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh, yeah go ahead.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Uh, before we do uh, are any of Joeys special romance magazines inthere?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No. No.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	  Okay! All clear!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	  Thanks Phoebe!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Ben, its Rachel!  But whatever.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	  Everything okay in there?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Dont talk to me now!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Awww, just like his daddy.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hey listen can you do me a big favor? The deans office just calledand said there was an urgent meeting. Can you watch Ben for like an hour?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 What-what about Monica?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Oh, she isnt home.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	  So it would just be, me alone?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Well, Ben would be there.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Huh umm
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Whats the matter?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Well thatyknow its just uh, Ive never done thatbefore. Me and him alone.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Rach, hes not an ex-con.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. Okay. Uh, what do I, what do I do with him?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 I dont know! Just-just talk to him-entertain him and keep him alive.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Okay.  Ben? Come here. All right, Im gonna leave youhere with Aunt Rachel for about an hour. Okay? Are you gonna be okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Yeah I think so.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	  I wasnt talking to you.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Ill be okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Okay, Ill see you soon buddy.  Be back inan hour.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Bye dad.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Bye.  Ahhh  So this is fun, huh?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Not really.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay. Uh, want something-want something to drink?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Uh great! How do you feel about Diet Coke?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Im not allowed to have soda.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay. Well thats pretty much all that we haveOh! Oh! Haveyou ever had a virgin margarita? 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Whats a virgin?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Water it is.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 What about the second minister we meet with? I kinda liked him.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 You mean the spitter?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Come on! It wasnt that bad!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Easy for you to say; youll be wearing a veil.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 All right, what about the third guy?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 You mean the guy who kept staring at your chest?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Can you blame him?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Sorry, I just dont like the idea of when I say, "Ido," hes thinking, "Yeah, Id do her too!"
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Well then we still have a problem.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	  With what?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Well, were trying to find someone to perform our wedding andtheyre all either boring or annoying or yknow, cant stop staring at theladies. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oo! You should have one of us do it!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Phoebe, were getting married, married; not sixth grademarried.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 No! No! Its-its uh a real thing! Anyone can get ordained onthe Internet and perform like weddings and stuff!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Are you serious?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Yes! A friend of mine did it and its totally legal!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 I call it!!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 What?! No! It was my idea!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Guys thank you very much but neither of you is marrying us.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Does calling it not mean anything anymore?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 We are going to have a legitimate member of the clergy! And when I saylegitimate I mean, gay and in control of his saliva!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Ben yknow when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hangout all the time. Cause I was, I was your daddys girlfriend.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 But youre not anymore!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No, Im not.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Cause you guys were on a break.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Hey! We were not on aOkay. Thats fine! Fine.Yknow what Ben? One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entirestory over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Whens my daddy coming back?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	  Fifty-two minutes.  So no-no brothers andsisters, huh? That must be nice. You dont have to share stuff.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Sharing is good.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh, youre one of those. But yknow what? I have twosisters of my own and we just-just tortured each other.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Really? Like how?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Well yknow, we would umm, repeat everything the other said, or uh,wed jump out of closets to scare each other, or switch the sugar for the salt sotheyd put salt on their cereal.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	  Thats a good one.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Yeah? You like that one?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Yeah, youre funny.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Im funny? Oh thank God! Well hey, Ive got a ton of these!Umm, oh hearDo you want a good one? Heres a good one. Umm, you uh, you take aquarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. Right?  And then you sayto person, I bet you cant roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin withoutit leaving your face. And then when they do it, theyre left with a big black pencilline right down the center of their face.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Can I do it to you?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Yeah, I-I-I-Im funny Ben, but Im not stupid. Okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 So, did you uh, find anyone to marry you guys yet?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 No, but Horny for Monica Minister called, wanting to know if we werestill together.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Were never gonna find anybody.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Well then let me do it!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Joe
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 No-no-no! Look, Ive been thinking about it. Im an actor right?So I wont get nervous talking in front of people.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Joey look its really sweet
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 No-no-no-no look no! I wont spit, and I wont stare atMonicas breasts! Yknow? Everyone knows Im an ass man!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 That is true.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah and the most important thing is that it wont be some like,stranger up there who barely knows you. Itll be me! And I swear Ill do areally good job. Plus, yknow I love you guys and-and it would really mean a lot tome.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  Yknow, we havent found anybody else.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 It might be kinda cool.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 So I can do it?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah you can do it.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 All right!!! Okay!! All right! Okay-okay, I gotta get started on myspeech! Oh, wait a minute, Internet ministers can still have sex right?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Hey Pheebs, hows it going?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh, I have a headache. A horrible headache!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Oh, Im sorry. Can I get you something?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh my God, youve got to stop chattering!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Here, take a couple of these. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 What is it?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Its Hexadrin.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh no, I dont believe in Western medicine. No, if you just applypressure to these points right here.  Then your hand starts to hurt and youstill have a headache, so thanks. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Okay, while were waiting for these pills to kick in, Imgonna sit you down on the couch. Come on.  Get somenice soft pillows under your head, Im gonna turn the TV on and you can watchwhatever you want. And ImSit downgonnamake you some tea. And then, Im gonna rub your feet.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh! My head! Oh!  Oh!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Coming. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 I have a bone to pick with you.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Uh-oh.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Yes! Ben learned a little trick.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh yeah? Did he pull the old 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Thats right! Thats right! Saran Wrap on the toilet seatso the pee goes everywhere!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh that.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Yeah that! You know I hate practical jokes! Theyre mean andtheyre stupid and-and I dont want my son learning them!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh, come on! Saran Wrap on the toilet seat, you dont thinkthats just a little funny?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 I was barefoot. Now tell me, the toilet thing is the only thing you taughthim right?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	  Yes.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Its amazing! My headache is completely gone! What are those pillscalled?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Hexadrin. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh, I love you Hexadrin!  Oh look! It comes with astory! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 No Phoebe, those are like the side affects and stuff.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Say what?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Yknow, the possible side affects.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh my God!  Dizziness, nervousness, drowsiness,facial swelling, nausea, headacheHeadache. Vomiting, stomach bleeding, liver damage!Now okay, I dont recall any of this coming up when you gave me these little deathcapsules! Oh Im sorry, extra strength death capsules!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Phoebe, relax none of that stuff ever happens! They just put it on therefor legal reasons!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Why?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 In case it happens.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	  Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Say hello to Reverend Joey Tribbiani! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 You did it! You got ordained?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah, I just got off the Internet! Man, there is a lot of porn out there!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Our minister
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 I have liver damage. Ow! Oh! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Phoebe, your liver is right here. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Okay, then I must be disoriented.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Anyway, I started working on what Im going to say for the ceremony,do you wanna hear it?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Yeah!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Now-now, listen this is just a first draft so  "We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion tocelebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share."  Eh?  "It is a love based on giving and receiving.As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared andreceived. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving."  "We too can share and love and have and receive."
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  Should we call the spitter?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 Hey Rachel! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Hi!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 What a nice surprise! What are you doing here?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Well yknow I was just in the neighborhood and I passed by yourbuilding and I thought to myself, "Whats up with Carol and sweet, littleBen?"
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 Can I ask whatCome on in.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 Umm uh, Ill make some coffee and we can uh, chat.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Id love that. I would loooove  So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? I would love to have a little...
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	  Gotcha!! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 I found him!  Very funny, come here!  That is exactly why Ive come here to talk to youokay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	  Rach, do you want some sugar in your coffee?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Yes ohDo I want sugar in my coffee? No, just some milk would be good Carol. Thanks.  Okay, do you remember all thatstuff I taught you yesterday?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	  Remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Dont do that.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Dont do that.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Seriously, your dad doesnt like pranks.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh damnit!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Oh damnit!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No! Dont say that! Dont say that!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Damnit!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No dont! Go back to repeating!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Damnit!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh crap!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 Oh crap!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 I feel like my face is swelling.  Is my face swelling?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Phoebe, your face is fine! Come on, none of this stuff is going tohappen to you! Stop being such a baby!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh, interesting you should call me that! Now that I may never have one!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Okay you guys, I got a little more written. Are you ready?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah. O-okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	  "When I think of the love that these two givers andreceivers share, I can not help but envy the lifetime ahead of having and loving andgiving and" And then I cant think of a good word for right here. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 How about receiving?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yes!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 See Joe, not that thats not grrreat! But, one of the cool thingsabout having somebody we know perform the ceremony is that it can be about us!Yknow, it can be more personal. You can tell stories about us!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Ooh, like the time you and I went to Atlantic City and I made you laugh sohard you threw up your whole steak?! Remember?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 No, not us  Us! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 I gotcha. Sorry.  So, did you ever make him throw up a wholeanything?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Did you ever feed him a poison capsule that made him bleed from theeyes?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 It doesnt say that!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh! Suddenly somebody knows all about the side affects!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 See Joe, we want you to tell stories but yknow, romanticstories. Nice stories.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh. Okay. Ooh! Ooh! Okay, maybe Ill talk about London! Yknowwhen you two hooked up! Only, only I wont say hooked up. Ill say, "Begantheir beautiful journey"
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 There you go!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 "by doin it."
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Joe?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Okay. All right. Umm, so uh, so how did it happen? Did your eyes meetacross the room? And then the next thing yknow youre in the bathtub togetherand shes feeding you strawberries?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Isnt that what happened with you and the brides maid?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah!! I call that London style.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 No that is not what happened with us. Well, I was umm, I was really sadthat night because this guy that I was Rosss mom.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 And then Chandler was, was really sweet and he consoled me. And well wedrank too much
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah baby!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 And I was a perfect gentleman and I walked her to her hotel room andsaid goodnight.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 But then later that night
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah baby!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	  Cute PJs! Youre really livin it uphere in London huh?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Well I was I was exactly expecting company after 9:15.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	  Is Joey here?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Well, last time I saw him he was heading out the door with thebrides maid and a bucket of strawberries. So uh, youre not still upset aboutwhat that guy told ya are ya?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Wouldnt you be?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Well, look its been a really emotional time yknow, andyouve had a lot to drink. And youve just got to let that go okay? Imean you were the most beautiful in the room tonight!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Really?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 You kidding? Youre the most beautiful woman in most rooms  Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whats goingon? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Well, not anymore.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 But we dont do that.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 I know, I just thought it would be fun.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 How drunk are you?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Drunk enough to know that I want to do this. Not so drunk that youshould feel guilty about taking advantage.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  Thats the perfect amount!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Okay!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	  Yknow whats weird?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 What?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 This doesnt feel weird!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 I know.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Youre a really good kisser.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Well, I have kissed over four women.  Do you wannaget under the covers?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Hm-hmm!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Okay!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Wow! You are really fast!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 It bodes well for me that speed impresses you.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Were gonna see each other naked.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yep!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Do you wanna do it at the same time?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Count of three?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 One!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Two!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Two!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica, Chandler	 Three! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Well I think its safe to say that our friendship is effectivelyruined.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Eh, we werent that close anyway!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Eh!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Joey! Joey! Joey! J-J-Joey-Joey-J-Joey! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Hey Joe! I was just watching a movie-e-e 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh, dude Im so sorry!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 No! No! No!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey no-no-no-no! Its cool! Its cool! I-Ill only be asecond, Im still with my brides maid, I justWhere are those condoms youbrought?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Theyre in my bag over there. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Ah. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Uh, could you leave me one?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	  For just you?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey listen, why dont you come downstairs with me? Theres somereally nice girls down there.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 No I-I-Im fine.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 All right, here you go buddy.  Go nuts. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Thats what that was?! Cause that other thing? I thought youwere on to something, but it did nothing for me.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Okay, can we change the topic? Because its really doingnothing for me.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Oh  Can you imagine if I hadnt left you that lastone? You two mightve never gotten together. Ooh-ooh! Could you imagine if I sentthat hooker up to the room like I was gonna?! Its like it was in the stars!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Yeah, its totally meant to be.  Tell him who youoriginally wanted to hook up with that night.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 What?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 What?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	  What?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Who did you originally want to hook up with?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Okay, fine but please dont be upset! Okay? I was reallydepressed okay? And really drunk! I just wanted something stupid and meaningless. I justwantedjust sex. So, when Iwent to your room that nightI was actuallylookingfor Joey. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah baby!  No baby!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  So you came to the room looking for Joey? Did you everin-intend on telling me about this?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 No because it-it didnt seem important.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Oh, its not important? Its not important?! If itwasnt for a brides maid youd be marrying him  not me!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Noo!! The point is that is was you that was there that night! Itis you that I am marrying! It is you that I feel in love with!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 And it is a love that is based on having and giving and receiv
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 I dont believe it. The most romantic night of my life andIm runner up.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Chandler, please! Do you know how unbelievably glad I am that Joey wasnot there that night?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey!  Now Im a man of the cloth, butI still have feelings!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	  Look there is no way youre doing this wedding now.Okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 What?! Thats not fair! Its not my fault! I was off with mybrides maid! And whos to say I wouldve even said yes?!  Imean I wouldve said yes. Chandler look y-y-you are making way to big a deal out ofthis, all right? Look, everything worked out okay!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Okay, its just weird! Okay? I dont want to be standingtheir saying my vows and then having the mental image of you and Monica! I-I-I needIdont know what I need. I need a walk.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Wait Chandler come on, letsits not a big deal!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 It is to me. You wanted to sleep with Batman, and instead youhad to settle for Robin. 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 This is crazy.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 I know! Robin is so gay!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 So now what have we agreed?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 No more pranks.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 And-and what else?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 That you and daddy were not on a break.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Very good.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Rachel! What are you doing here?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Im just visiting my good friend Carol.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Your good friend?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Yeah!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Whats her last name?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 CarolLesbian?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Nice. And by the way that uh, that line down my face?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 What line?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Wh-wh-what line? The line that prompted a student in my last classof the day to say uh,  "Dude, dont you ever wasyour face?"
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 All right, Im sorry. Im sorry I didnt tell you but youwere so mad already!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Of course I was mad! I told you I-I hate this stuff! Okay? It-itsnot funny!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	  Hey Ross!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hi.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 Whats not funny?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Practical jokes.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 Oh II think theyre funny.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 You have a line down your face.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	 What? 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Okay, maybe they are not funny to you
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Carol	  Oh my God!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Or Carol! But theyre funny to kids and who is it hurting?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Uh, yknow what? Ill tell you who it hurts! It hurts the kidwho has all his clothes stolen in gym class so he has to go to the principals officewearing nothing but a catchers mitt!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 That was you?! We heard about you in Junior High! Did you reallyjust shake your fist in the air and shout, "I will be revenged?!"
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 I will be! Listen, I dont want you teaching my son that stuffanymore. Okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Fine. Fine, but Ill have you know that once I taught him thatstuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but Ill goback to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if thats what you want!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 No thats not what I want. Uh, Im glad you guys were bondingbut I
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Look he doesnt have any brothers or sisters, somebodys gonnahave to teach him this stuff! And I havent taught him anything that a normal6-year-old doesnt know anyway!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	  Crap!!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 I gotta go! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Hey. Do you want this scone?  It came for me butit would probably rather sleep with you!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Chandler, come on nothing even happened!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Look Joe, I know you wanted to do the wedding
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 No-hey-no! If you dont want me to do it, I except that. I dontcare about that. I justI dont want you to be upset.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 How can I not be upset? Okay? I finally fall in love with thisfantastic woman and it turns out that she wanted you first!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Yeah for like a half an hour one night! Chandler, she wants you for therest of her life! Youre so lucky! Look what I missed out on by not being there!Although you know what? It could never have worked like you guys did, cause you guysare perfect for each other. Yknow, we look at you and-and we see you together and itjustit-it fits. Yknow? And you just know its gonna last forever.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Thats what you should say.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 What?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 When youre marrying us; thats what you should say.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Really? I can do it?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Id love it if you would do it.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 But those are the words! Those exact words!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Well I dont know remember exactly but, its-its prettymuch about having and giving and sharing and receiving.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Hey Im sorry to do this to you again but uh, is there any way youcan look after Ben for a little bit? I-Ive got this meeting at school. And-and he-heasked for his uh, Fun Aunt Rachel, so
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Ohhh! Well of course I will watch him! We have fun, dont we Ben?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Okay, Ill see you later pal.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Ohh, okay. WhAh-ha!  Wait a minute. Uh Ben, I cant do it.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 What?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 I cant let him go out that way, hes got a meeting. Youve got something here on your back.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 What?  Thats great.That is great.  What did we justfinish talking about Ben?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 Oh I
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ben	 What did we just finish talking about Ben?!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 All right, thats it!  Comeyouno! You are in big trouble young man!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No! Wait! Come on!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 Wait! No! Ben, come here! I am not kidding!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 No you guys 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Ross	 I-I-am
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Rachel	 EHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! My God!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my God!!!!!!! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Hey!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Hey-hey.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 So are guys doing okay?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Chandler	 Yeah, we talked and Monica made me see that I over reacted a littlebit and some things in life are more important.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Yeah baby! 
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Im really glad you guys are okay but, I just keep thinking whatwould happen if-if you two  actually had hooked up.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Honey! Dinners ready!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Fat Joey	 Whats my little chef got for me tonight?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Your favorite!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Ho-ho-ho,  fried stuff with cheese!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Yep! And lots of it!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Fat Joey	 Thanks sweetheart. Give me a little sugar here.  Okay.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Monica	 Okay, in we go.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Fat Joey	 Here we go! Here we go! Here we go!  How you doin?
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Here you go.
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	  Oh my God! This is a six-hour pill!  Thats it! Im out of the woods! Ohh! What a relief!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Joey	 Good for you!
07	16	0716	The One With The Truth About London	Phoebe	 Oh, its like huge weight has been lifted! Cause look,  no hair loss, not a rash, no hives, Im just so happy! Because noshortness of breath, no temporary euphoriaOh.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 So the wedding caterer sent me this list of twelve appetizers and I haveto narrow it down to six.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Food? Uh-huh gimme! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 So did Monica tell you about this great band called the Swing Kingsthat were trying to get to play at the wedding?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Since when are you into swing music?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Oh since forever! I used to go all over town listening to bands!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Chandler.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Gap commercial.  So did you book them? Did you call?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 I will.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Do you want me to call?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 No, Ill do it. You just stick to your job.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 What is your job?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Staying out of the way.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 This is impossible Monica, why dont you just pick all 15? 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 There were only twelve.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh yeah, I added three.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 What are peanut butter fingers?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh yeah 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	  Well hello!Shes cute! Should we uh, go try to talk to her?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Sure! Thats one of the great things about being engaged.Im not nervous talking to pretty girls anymore.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 Could you guys help me? 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Uh yeah! Let me, let me get that for you.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 It-its really heavy.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	  I got it.  So hi, Im uh, Im Ross and this is my friend Chandler. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 I-I am Kristen.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Kristen, hi. Are you uh, new to the area, cause if youareId love to show you around sometime.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 II uh, actually just moved from four blocks over.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Ah.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 But-but this block is like a whole other world.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yknow actually it does have a very interesting history. Uh, thisstreet is the first street in the city to have an underground sewer system.  Before that sewage and waste would just flow right down thestreet. Yeah, sometimes ankle deep! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	  Smooth.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	  Excuse me? 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Umm, say youre gonna be starving after all this moving. What do yousay I take you to dinner tonight?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Oh Id like that.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yeah?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Yeah.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Great! Uh, let me take this up for you. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 After you.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Oh no-no, after you.   Oh my God! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	  Am I crazy or does this totally go?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Oh my God! You look so beautiful!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	  Thank you Rachel but, look at Monica!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 This is it. Yeah, this is the one. I cant believe I found it!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 Wow you look so beautiful! If I knew you, Id cry.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Well Im Monica Geller, ball like a baby.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 Im Megan Bailey.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Have you found your dress yet?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Oh no, these dresses are all so amazing but there is no way I couldafford one.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 No, I cant afford this either. No. I-I-Im, Im just tofigure out which one I want then Im gonna get it at Kleinmans, this discountplace in Brooklyn, day after tomorrow they are having a huge sale.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Oh, thanks for the tip.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Yeah! So-so when are you getting married?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Oh Im not, I just like to try these on.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 I do the same thing.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Im just kidding. Im getting married July 25th.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Im just kidding too.  Im getting married inDecember. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	  So when are you getting married?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh May 15th.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Oooh its getting close!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Yeah!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 So uh, whos your photographer?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Jeffery.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 We met with him. Did he show you the photos of the nude wedding he did?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 The best man? Wow!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 I know! I almost called off my wedding. Oh, whos your band?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh, my fiancee wants the Swing Kings.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Oh, youre so lucky. My fiancee wants the heavy metal band Carcass. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Ooh, is that spelled with a C or a K? Oh my God!It doesnt matter; theyre both great!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Oh yknow what? Yknow what? Now that you know what you wantyou should go to Kleinmans and get it half off. This place is so overpriced.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	The Woman	 I own this store.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 So, does this  come in another color or 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Hi! You uh, movin in or movin out?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Im moving in.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh uh, can I give you a hand?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Oh okay. But yknow what? Be careful. Because a guy was helping mebefore had to leave because he hurt his back.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Boyfriend?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 No.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Im Joey. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Kristen.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh wow, what a beautiful name!  What is it again?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Kristen.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Got it!  So
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 So uh, do you live around here?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah! Right down there.  Hey listen; let me give you alittle tip. Do not take a nap on this stoop  or you can wake up with yourshoes gone.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Ill remember that.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Okay. Yeah. Listen would you uh, would you like to have dinner with metonight?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Oh I, I have plans tonight. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 But how about tomorrow?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Sounds great! Okay all right, well where does this go? 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 You look strong, why dont I take that and you grab one of theboxes.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Okay. Yeah.  Yeah, Ill grab this one. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	A Woman	 What is taking so long?! I mean whatever!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	  So this is Brooklyn.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 All right, listen up. There is usually only one dress in each size sowhen they open those doors, fan out. Now, this is what youre looking for!  Memorize it! When you locate the dress, blow on these. All right?  Three short blasts, when you hear it. Come running.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Okay.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Got it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 All right.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	A Woman	 Here he comes! Hurry!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Oh theyre pushing! Theyre pushing!!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	  Hey! Dont be a baby!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Well I
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	A Woman	 Lets go!!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	  Hey! Rachel! Come on!!!!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 No. No. Not it. Not it. Not it.   Dont crowd me!  This is it!This is the dress! Oh my God, its perfect!  Im sorry, thisones taken!  Whoa!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Megan!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Monica!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 You came?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Yeah!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 This is my dress!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 No!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Yes it is! You saw me wearing it!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 And now youll see me buying it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 What? You freak! You wouldnt even have known about this place ifit wasnt for me!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Megan	 Look, you dont want to fight me.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Maybe I do! Im pretty feisty! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	  Im coming! Im coming! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Woman	 Hey!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Okay!  Hey!  What do I do?!!  Whatare you doing?  Did you find the dress? 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Did you find the dress?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 No! You gotta get me out of here Phoebe! These bargain shoppers arecrazy!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 IWe gotta get Monica. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 No! You gotta hold my hand!!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Oh my God!! Excuse me! Excuse me!  
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	  Go! Go! Go!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	  Hey
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 NOW!!!!!!!! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 So Ross, how was your date the other night? Did you tell her about themagical ride that starts with the flush of every toilet?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Laugh all you want but uh, she actually left me a message sayingshed like to go out again.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Huh.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yeah in fact, Im gonna go call her right now. And Ill makesure to tell her my friend Chandler says 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Hey Chandler!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Hey!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Listen, sorry I didnt stop by last night but I had a date.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Uh Joe, when its one oclock in the morning and youdont come by? Thats okay!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Well check it out, I was with this really hot girl who just moved in rightacross the street!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Really? Right across the street?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Whend you meet her?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Two days ago.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Excellent! Yknow Ross met somebody too!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh yeah?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	  Hey.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Hi! Howd it go?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Oh great! Were going out again Saturday. But I just found shesalso seeing some other guy.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	  Really?! Joe? What would you do if you were inRosss situation?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Well, I sorta am. I mean yeah, Im dating this girl whos alsoseeing another guy. But, I dont know, Im not to worried about it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well you shouldnt be. Believe me I wouldnt want to be the guywhos up against you.  I mean that doofus is going to lose!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 So this is nice! I wish I didnt have to go, believe me! Butunfortunately I have to.  Oh uh, by the way,whats the name the girl youre dating?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey, Ross	 Kristen Lang.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Bye! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well obviously only one of us can keep dating her.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Obviously! So, how do we decide?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well now lets-lets look at this objectively, I think I shoulddate her
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Or, or Im the one who datesher.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Thats interesting, but check this out. I date her
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah-yeah I like that but just to go in another direction
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Okay, okay. This can go on for a while.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah well we should order some food then.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 No Joey! Look why dont, why dont we just let her decide? Okay?Hey-hey, well each go out with her one more time. And-and well see whoshe likes best.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  That sounds fair.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Maybe Ill take her to that new French restaurant down thestreet
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Ah yeahwait a second now! Look were gonna have to set aspending limit on the date. I dont have the money to take her to a fancy place likethat.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well sorry, thats what I do on dates.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 All right, well I guess Ill just have to do what I do on dates.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 So lets decide on the spending limit
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah. Uh, a slicesix dollars?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 I was thinking more like a hundred.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Okay. Can I borrow 94 dollars?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 I know. Hand me a tissue. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Youre out of Diet Coke.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Hello?  What?!  You what?!  Hey you listenhere missy!  Wh
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 What?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 That was that girl Megan! She booked the Swing Kings on the day of ourwedding and said that I couldnt have them back unless I gave her the dress!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	  Does that mean Carcass is available?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 What am I gonna do?! That is the dress! That is the dress!WhChandler wants the band. What do I do?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Well just figure out a way to talk him out of it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 How?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Youre out of toilet paper!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Hey!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Hey! Whats up?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 I just wanted to come by and yknow, wish you good luck on your date.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Oh thanks!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah. What time are you meeting her?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 We have 8:00 reservations at Grammercy Bistero.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Wow, thats in like 20 minutes. Youd better get dressed.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 I am dressed.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh. Well good!  For me.  What isthis? Did you give yourself a facial?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 I have an oily T-zone!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Okay dude!  Hey you uh, you sent Kristen flowers.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Thats right.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 You spent a hundred dollars. Thats the limit. Youre screwed!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Uh actually, I sent the flowers before the actual date. So techincally, technicallyI didnt break any rules. Thanks for stopping by though.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh-oh! So thats the way its gonna be huh? Yeah I can break therules too yknow!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 I dont know.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Why am I not surprised?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yknow what Ross? Im not gonna let you get away with this!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 I dont think you have much choice.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Well well see!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Bye-bye!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah bye-bye!  Hey! Sojust a light layer?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yes. Yes. Just here  andthere .
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Joey got meat sauce on the banister again! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah, swing music is so out.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Phoebe, hes gotta be in the room for that to work.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	  What are you guys talking about?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Well umm, we were just talking about the yknow, the Swing Kingsand just wondering whether yknow, they were the right way to go.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Yeah, I went to a wedding once where they had swing music and uh, twomonths later the couple got divorced. And now Im not saying that theres anyconnection here yknow, but they did tell me thats why they got divorced.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 But I love swing music!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Phoebe	 Yeah but the Swing Kings? Yknow they suck so much that peopleactually die at their concertsThey just stop living.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Look all I know is when Monica and I went to see them, we had fun! Andtheres another reason too.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Well, what is the other reason?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 I dont want to say.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Rachel	 Well you have to because maybe its stupid.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Well its just while Monica and I were dancing to them itwasthe first time I knew thatyou were the woman I wanted to dance all mydances with.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh crap!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 So they said our table will be ready in just a few minutes.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Oh great!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yeah.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Is your back feeling better?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Oh yeah its fine. I guess the more muscles you have the more theycan spasim out of control.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Kristen?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Joey!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Hi!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Hi! What are you doing here?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Oh I like this place. And technically, technically Im not breakingany rules so I
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Well uh, Ross? This is Joey. Joey? Ross.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Hi!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Hi.  Its nice to meet you. I used to have afriend named Joey. I dont anymore.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Our table will be ready in a couple minutes.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yeah. So
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 So Joey umm, you look familiar. Are uh, are you on TV or something?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Well Joey doesnt like to talk about it but, hes one of thestars of Days Of Our Lives.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Thats right! Thats right, dont you play a woman?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 A woman in a mans body.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Much better.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 So yknow Ross its funny cause, you look familiar to metoo. Have you ever been married?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well yes, yes I have. In fact umm, just the other day Kristen and I weretalking about how Ive been married and how I have a son.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Yeah, little Eric.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Thats right! Wait no, Ben.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 So youve just married the one time then?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Well umm
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Youve been married twice?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yes. And another time after that. Boy Im getting hungry! Hey Joey,have you ever been so hungry on a date that when a girl goes to the bathroom you eat someof her food?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 You said the waiter ate my crab cake.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	  Yeah. So uh Ross, well nowwhy did that firstmarriage breakup? Was it because the woman was straight or she was a lesbian?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Kristen	 Do you two know each other?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey, Ross	 No. No.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 No. It just seems like Ross is the kind of a guy that would marry a womanon the verge of being a lesbian and then push her over the edge.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Have you ever slept in the same bed as a monkey?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Hey you leave Marcel out of this!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Fine! Have you ever got stuck in a pair of your own leather pants?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Hey-hey have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet VD boy?!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Monkey lover!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 When do you think we lost her?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Probably around gonorrhea.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Hi, honey! Im home!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	  Dont come in here!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Why? Do you another boyfriend in there or something?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 No! We only mess around at his place!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Yknow its funny I started it but, now its scary me.So could you come out here please?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 No, Im wearing a wedding dress.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Oh you got a wedding dress? Thats great!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Yeah but Im not keeping it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Well then why cant I see it?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh. I guess you can. Okay but; I-I have to return it, so you cantlike it.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Okay I promise. Ill-Ill hate it.  Wow!You-you lookhideous.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Really?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Yeah, thats like the most ugliest dress Ive ever seen.Wh-why do you to return it?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Oh because it doesntreally fit. Oh by the way, I-I bookedthe Swing Kings.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Oh thats great! Great! Thanks! But that dress I mean itslike yuck! Its terrible! It makes me wanna just rip it right off of you!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Okay! But you cant rip it. Well, maybe a little.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	 Okay!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	  Hey guys! Do you wanna look at the song list for the wedding? Guys?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Chandler	  I thought you were gonna be gone all day.
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 All right? Whats going on?
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Monica	 Im sorry. Im sorry. I-I should probably leave you girlsalone. 
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Ross	 Yeah, laugh all you want but in ten minutes were gonna have youngerlooking skin!
07	17	0717	The One With The Cheap Wedding Dress	Joey	 Yeah!  Yknow, she could use alittle  Oh nice shot!!! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Hey! You guys! Youre not gonna believe this! I just got off thephone with my agent
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh my God!  Im sorry, too soon. You go.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Okay. I got nominated for my part on Days of Our Lives!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Joey!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Good for you!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Congratulations! Wow! I cant believe youre nominated for an Emmy!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 No-no.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Oh Soap Opera Digest award!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 No! Im up for a Soapie!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Honey? Is that something youre making up?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 No, no, no! Its real! And it has been since 1998.  Hey Rach! Rach! Im up for a Soapie!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	  Oh my God! Oh my God!! That is like the third most prestigioussoap opera award there is!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Thank you! Well, I guess now I know who Im taking to the awards.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Oh, stop that! Dont kid about that!  Will all the stars bethere?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Many are scheduled to appear.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Oh my God! Oh my God! I cant go! Im gonna be too nervous!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	  Okay, Ill go!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 No!! You are getting married! This is all I have.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 and it was Ernst Muhlbrat who first hypothesized that theVelociraptor would expand its collar and emit a high pitched noise to frightenits predator.  Yes Mr. Lewis? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 What kinda noise?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Just a high pitched intimidating noise.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 But like how?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Well we-we dont know for sure. But in my head it-it soundedsomething like this.  Of course, this is just conjecture. Okay, thats uh, thats all fortoday.  Uh Mr. Morse, can I see you for a moment? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Yes sir.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Mr. Morse I need to talk to you about your mid-term exam, Im afraidI-I had to fail you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	  Why?!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Well you need 60% to pass
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Whatd I get?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Seven.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Thats not so good.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 No-no its not. What-what happened there Ned?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Well maybe you can cut me some slack. Im sort of in love.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Well Im sorry but, that-thats really not my problem.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Im in love with you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Well that brings me in the loop a little.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 You see, thats why I did so bad on this test. Im having ahard time concentrating. When youre up there  and youreteaching and your face gets all seriousyou look so good.  You wearthat tight little turtleneck sweater
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Okay!  Umm, I uh, Im your teacher. Imsorry, youre-youre a student and I-and I like women. In spite of what may bewritten on the backs of some of these chairs.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh my God! That guy at the counter is totally checking you out!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Really?  My God, hes really cute.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Go for it.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Phoebe, Im engaged!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Im just saying, get his number just in case. But no Chandler is inan accident and cant perform sexually and he would want you to take a lover tosatisfy the needs that he can no longer fulfill.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	The Cute Guy	  Hi!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Op, can I just tell you something? Very flattered but umm, Imengaged. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	The Cute Guy	 Wow! Uh, this is kind of embarrassing. I was actually coming over totalk to your friend.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Well you should be embarrassed. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	The Cute Guy	  I thought you knew I was looking at you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 I did, but that was really fun.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  And the winner isJoey Tribbiani!  Oh Wow! I honestly never expected this. I uh, Ididnt prepare a speech. But umm, Id like to thank  myparents, whove always been there for me. Id also like to thank my friends,Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Im fourth!  Look at you with your little maplesyrup award!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Yeah may-maybe you dont tell anyone about this.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 What? No! Its not a big deal! I do that too, with my shampoobottle.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Really?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 What award are you practicing for?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Grammy, Best New Artist.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Oh, hey listen! The Soapies called today and I also get to presentan award.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Ohh thats great!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Yeah!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 So youll definitely get onstage, even if you dont win.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  What you-you dont think Im gonna win?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Well of course I do! But yknow, favorite returning character is atough category Joey. I mean youre up against the guy who survived his own cremation.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Yeah. No-no I-I know I might not win, but its justIvenever even been nominated before! I want it so much.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Well Joey, youll probably get it. But you should probablyyour-your gracious loser face. Yknow when like the cameras are on you and you wannalook disappointed but also that your colleague deserved to win. Yknow? So itssorta like 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Hey! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Yknow?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 You practice losing the Grammies too?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Oh no, at the Grammies I always win.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Ah.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh hey!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Hey! Howd your date go with Jake?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh, great! We couldnt keep our eyes off each other all night andthen every once and a while yknow, hed kinda lean over and stroke my hair andtouch my neck. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Okay, stop it Phoebe, youre getting me all tingly.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	  All I could think of was yknow, "Is he gonna kissme? Is he gonna kiss me?"
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 And did he?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Im a lady Monica, I dont kiss and tell. But this hickeyspeaks for itself. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Okay-okay, I got it. I got it.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 I just like him so much that I just feel like Ive had 10 drinkstoday and Ive only had six.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Oh, I havent had that feeling since I first started going out withChandler. Wow, Im never gonna have that feeling again am I?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 You sound like a guy.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 No, a guy would be saying, "Im never gonna get to sleep withanyone else." Oh my God! Im never gonna get to sleep with anyone else!Ive been so busy planning the wedding that I forgot about all the things thatId be giving up! I mean, IIm never gonna have a first kiss again.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Youll have a last kiss.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Can I ask you something? Have you ever had a guy have a crush on you?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Is that why you wanted to tie my tie?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Theres this kid in my class who said hes in love with me.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Whoa!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	  Whoa what?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Ross has a boyfriend.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 I do-I do not have a boyfriend. Theres a guy in one of myclasses who-who has a crush on me.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Really?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Yeah! I dont know. I mean, last year Elizabeth now-now this kid.What-what-what-what is it?! Am I giving out some kind ofsexy professor vibe? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Not right now.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 It-itThe point is my natural charisma has made him fail his midterm.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Oh, see now I feel bad for the kid! I had a crush on a teacher once andit was so hard! Yknow youI couldnt concentrate and I blushed every timehe looked at me. I mean come on, you remember whats its like to be 19 and inlove.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Yeah. I guess I can cut him some slack.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Howd you get over that teacher?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 I didnt. I got under him.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  Problem solved.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jake	 Bye Phoebe.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Okay bye. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jake	 All right. Bye. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Bye!  We said good-byeat the door so as not to flaunt our new love.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Phoebe, its okay. You dont have to tip toe around me.I-Ive been thinking about it and umm, yknow what? Im okay about nothaving that new relationship feeling
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jake	  I miss you already!!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	  I miss you too!!!! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 See? Thats what I mean. I mean that, thats great! ButI wouldnt trade in what I have for that. I mean Im gonna be with Chandler forthe rest of my life, and thats what makes me happy.  Heysweetie, come here! Come sit down. Hey Phoebe and I were just talking about how ourrelationship is deep and meaningful. It really is dont you think?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 Oh totally!  Pull my finger.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Announcer	 Presenting the award for Favorite Returning Male Character isMcKensize
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  This is it! This is my category.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 I know! My God! Do you have your speech?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Yeah, I got my speech!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Do you got your gracious loser face?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Yeah. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Now Joey remember, if you win you have to hug me! You hug me!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Okay. Can I squeeze your ass?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 On TV?! Yeah!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Kay! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	The Presenter	 in the category of Favorite Returning Male Character thenominees are: John Wheeler from General Hospital , Gavin Grant from TheYoung and the Restless , Dunkin Harrington from Passions ,and Joey Tribbiani from Days of Our Lives . And the Soapie goestoGavin Grant from The Young and the Restless!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 What the?! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Announcer	 Presenting the award for Favorite Supporting Actress is Joey Tribbianifrom Days of Our Lives. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  Any one of the brilliant actresses nominated forthis award tonight deserves to take it home. Unfortunately only one can.  The nominees for Best Supporting Actress are from Passions Erin Goff. From One Life to LiveMary Loren Bishop , from All My Children Sarah Mchann, and from Days of Our LivesJessica Ashley. And the winner isJessica Ashley from Daysof Our Lives.  Uh, unfortunately Jessica couldnt be with us tonight soIll be accepting this award on her behalf.  And Im surethat Jessica would like to thank my parents who always believed in me. Shed alsolike to thank my friends, Chandler, Monica, Ross, Phoebe, and Rachel whossittin right there!  
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Joey! Why did we have to rush out of there so fast?!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Rach we had to get out of there because, look what I won! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Oh my God you stole her award!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 No-no! No, Im accepting it on her behalf. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Joey I dont think you know what behalf means.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Sure I do! Its a verb! As in, "I behalfin it!"
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Joey, you have got to take this back!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 But why?! I shouldve won one and I really want it and shedidnt even care enough to come to the thing! It could also be a Grammy.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	  No! Joey!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Come on Rach! No one saw me take it! There was a whole table full ofem.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Do you really want an award you didnt win?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 No! I want an award I did win! But nobodys giving me any of those!PlusHey Rach, if-if I put it up there  right? When people comeover theyll see it and theyll think I won it.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Joey is says Best Supporting Actress!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 I can scratch that right off.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Joey no, this is wrong! You have to take it back, okay? You dontwant to win an award this way. Youre very talented. And someday youre gonnawin one of these for real and that one is gonna mean something.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 All right!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 All right?  Thank you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Ill take it back tomorrow.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Thank you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  If I cant have it you cant have it! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 Professor Geller?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	  Yes Mr. Lewis, how can I help you?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 I know I didnt do well on my midterms and stuff but, I was kindahoping you could change my grade.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 And why exactly would I do that? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 Because Im in love with you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	  What?!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 Yeah, Im allin love with you and stuff. So could you changemy grade?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 No!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 Well why not you changed Neds grade!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Well thats different! Okay? Because he, he was actually in love withme!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 No hes not! Hes totally yanking your chain! Hes donethis with three other teachers!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 What?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 Hes got a girlfriend!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 I cant believe someone would do that for a grade.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Lewis	 I know! Its awful. I love you.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Have you seen Chandler?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 No. Why?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Cause I just keeping thinking about all these things that Imnot gonna have and its freaking me out. I dont know what to do about it.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Okay, dont sweat it.  Chandler is nowherearound so go ahead get it out of your system. That guys cute. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Phoebe! Come on Im serious! I just got to talk to him about allthis.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 No that is the last thing you want to do!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Why?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Because youre marrying him!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 You gotta help me out here Pheebs.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 All right, Ive never been engaged and Ive never really beenmarried, but I can only tell you what my mother told me. Whenever you have doubts or fearsor anxieties about a relationship, do not communicate them to your husband.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 So Im not supposed to share my doubts and fears with the guyIm gonna spend the rest of my life with?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 That is correct! Yes, youre supposed to take all of that stuff andput it in a little box in your mind and then lock it up tight.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Your mother told you this?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Yes!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 The woman that got married a bunch of times and killed herself when youwere 13?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Youre right! Go!  Go tellChandler! Hurry before its too late! Wait no!  Does this also meanputting out doesnt get you love? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 I cannot believe Im gonna meet Jessica Ashley!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Okay wait-wait p-please be cool! Okay? I work with this woman.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Okay, Im totally cool! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jessica Ashley	 Come in.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Hey Jessica.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	  Hey Jess.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Ah, this is my friend Rachel.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jessica Ashley	 Hi.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Sup? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Uh listen, heres your Soapie. I accepted it for ya. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jessica Ashley	  Oh my God! I won! Do you have any idea what thismeans?! 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Well, that-that-thats it? Youre gonna, youre gonna putit on your self or anything?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Jessica Ashley	 No, I try to save that for real awards. Now, if youllexcuse me. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	  Take it back?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Absolutely.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Joey	 Y-y-yeah!  Yeah you do. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Honey, as we get closer to the wedding, is there anything that you wouldlike to talk about or share?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 Okay. Well, I think the centerpieces are too big
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Youre wrong! The centerpieces are fine! Do you ever get scared atall?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 Kinda. Theyre really big.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Doesnt it ever just freak you out that-that youre nevergonna be with anybody new again?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 What?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Just, I love you so much. JustIts just sometimes it bothersme that Im never gonna have that feeling. Yknow when you meet someone for thefirst time and its new and exciting? Yknow that rush?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 No. No, see when I first meet somebody its uh its mostlypanic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Okay, but all right youre a guy, does it not freak you thatyoure never gonna sleep with anybody else?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 Sleeping with somebody new, anxiety, panic, and Im afraid evenmore sweating.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Even with me?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 I was dangerously dehydrated during the first six months of ourrelationship.  Look, for me the rush is knowing that we are gonna betogether for the rest of our lives.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Really?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	 Well yeah! But now that I know that youre having these thoughts,Im back to panic, anxiety, and uh Im definitely gonna need some kind of sportsdrink.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Monica	 Come here! Come here!  Sweetie you dont have to worry.No, besides yknow what? Im gonna have a lot of new things with you. The firsttime we buy a house. Our first kid. Our first grandkid
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Chandler	  Water! Water! Water!
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Uh Mr. Morse, can I speak to you for a moment?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	  That was a great lecture today. Did you get a little haircut?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Uh-hmm, yeah-yeah do you like it? Do-do you looove it? I just want you toknow that Im changing your grade back.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 What?! Why?
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Cause I know what youre trying to pull here. Okay? Itsnot gonna work.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Morse	 Im not trying to pull anything. Look I love you dude.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Ross	 Yknow what? I-Im not even gonna talk about this. Okay? Thislittle thing is over. I know you have a girlfriend! OkayYeah! And I know about the other professors! How do you think that makes mefeel Ned?! You used me! You dont love me and you never did!  Ah Professor Winston, ProfessorFredrickson, Ill be right with you.  Dont make this worse andIll give you a C.  Shall we? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Rach? 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Ill be out in a second.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Oh.  Its just so unexpected! II uhBoyIll tell you its just such an honor to be nominated for a Nobel Prizeand yknow to win one for a massage. Especially after having just won a Tonyaward for best actress in
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	  Honey, we have to go. Our reservations are at8:00.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 in Reservations at 8:00 by Neil Simon.  Thank-thank you Neil. Thank you for the words. 
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Rachel	 Okay honey, you can finish this later were gonna be late. We gottago.
07	18	0718	The One With Joey's Award	Phoebe	 Please, dont play the music. Just uh one more. LIVE FROM NEWYORK! ITS SATURDAY NIGHT!!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	  Oh hey! How was your audition?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Im sorry, do I know you?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 What are you doing?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Nothing, Im just practicing blowing you off because Im gonnabe a big movie star!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Oh! You got it?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Well, no not yet. But the audition went really good.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 What was it for?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Oh, its this big budget period movie about these three Italianbrothers who come to America around the turn of the century. Its really classy! Oh,and the director is supposed to be the next, next Martin Scorcese.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 The next, next?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Yeah, theres this guy from Chicago whos supposed to be thenext Martin Scorcese, all right? But then this guys right after him.  Hello!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Estelle	 Joey! Its Estelle! I just talked to the casting people;they loved you!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	  They loved me!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Estelle	 Yeah, they wanna see you again tomorrow.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	  Oh my God!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Estelle	 Theres just one thing. Do you have a problem with fullfrontal nudity?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie without it!  Oh. Uh, okay uh let me call you back. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Whats the matter?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 They want me to be totally naked in the movie!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Wow!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 I know! My grandmothers gonna see this!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Grandmas gonna have to get in line.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hey the wedding is so close! Are you getting nervous?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Yeah. But a part of me also cant wait til its over.Chandler and I have this pact not to have sex again until the wedding.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 A no sex pact huh? I actually have one of those going on with every womanin America.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Hey Phoebe, will you give me a hand? 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Sure.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 I gotta make up the guest bedroom.  Hey, Cousin Cassie iscoming to stay with us a few days.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Cassie?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Uh-hmm.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Wow, I havent seen her for like forever. I wonder if she stillcarries that Barbie everywhere she goes.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Ross, shes 25 years old.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 So what! I still haveNo youre probably right.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Hi!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Hey Pheebs, can I talk to you over here for a second?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Yeah!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Subtle guys!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 What?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 I know youre planning my surprise bridal shower.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Well okayWell dont ruin it! Just play along atleast!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Okay. Sorry. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Oh my God! We have to throw her a shower?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Hey! What did you decide to do about the movie?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 I dont know! Its not like its porn! This is a serious,legitimate movie. Yknow? And the nudity is really important to the story.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Thats what you say about porn.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Youre right. Maybe I shouldnt even go on the call back.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 No! No you should! A lot of major actors do nude scenes! I mean thechance to star in a movie? Come on!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Well thats true. And I am only naked in one scene. Plus it soundsreally great. My characters catholic and he falls in love with this Jewish girl. Whorun away together and they get caught in this big rainstorm. So we go into this barn andundress each other and hold each other. Its really sweet and-and tender.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Plus, everyones gonna see your thing. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Well when can we have this shower?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 She has got so much going on we-we have only two options. We haveFriday
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Well thats only two days away. What is the other option?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Yesterday!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Well if we make it yesterday, woo-hoo! Were done!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Oh my God Phoebe, this is impossible! We cant do this by Friday!We have to find a place. We have to invite people! We have to get food! Theres justtoo much to do! Its impossible! We cant do it! We cannot do it! We cannot doit!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Rachel, calm down!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Okay. Im sorry. Youre right, youre right.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	  Just calm down woman!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Phoebe, I already, I already did.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Oh okay. All right, then I need to calm down a little.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Okay. Okay.  I think we can do this if we just getorganized. All right? We have two days to plan this party. We just need to make fastdecisions! Okay? All right, where are we gonna have it?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Uh, here. What time?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 4 oclock. Food?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Finger sandwiches and tea.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Ooh great! Very Monica.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 And chili!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Ah you went one too far. Uh, flowers or balloons?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Both!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Were paying for this yknow.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Neither.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Okay. Umm, what should we do for the theme?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Lusts of the flesh.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  What?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 I dont know.  A cowboy theme?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Yknow Im-Im really glad we decided not to sleeptogether before the wedding.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Oh boy me too!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Yknow I was thinking if we had aa big fight and uh webroke up for a few hours
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Yeah?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Technically we could have sex again. What do you think, bossy anddomineering?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 The wedding is off, sloppy and immature!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Thats me! Come on!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Okay.  Butwait, we cant. My Cousin Cassie is in the guest room, were supposed to havelunch.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Well get rid of her, obsessive and shrill.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Shrill?! The wedding is back on!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 I thought I heard voices. You must be Chandler.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	  Hi! Nice to meet you!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Nice to meet you too.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 So, are you ready to go?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Yeah.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	  Chandler!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Ill be right with you.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	  Cassie needs to stay at your place.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Whatwhy?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Because Purvry Perverson over here cant stop staring at her.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 What?! Chandler shes our cousin!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 I was not staring at her. Okay? I was just listening intently.Its called being a good conversationalist. Watch. Say something.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 You were staring about eight inches south of there.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Fine, she can stay at my place. By the way, what-what does Cassie evenlook like now.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 She looks exactly like Aunt Marilyn.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Chandler	 Umm, so this Aunt Marilyn is-is-is-is she coming to the wedding?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Wafer thin ice!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Hey, Im back!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Hi-hi Joey.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Uh so, will-will I be reading the same scene again?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Actually, I tried to call to you. You didnt need tocome down here today.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Oh great! Yknow I wouldve been perfect for this part, butwhatever! Yknow, thanks for making a bad decision and ruining your movie! Good day!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Wait Joey! You didnt need to come down because thedirector saw your tape from yesterday and loved it.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 And scene! Huh? Wasnt that fun? We did a little improv there. Yeah!Okay! So you-you-you-you were saying?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Well, the director thinks youre really right for thepart and wants to meet you tomorrow.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Wow! Sure! Thats great!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Oh and your agent said you were okay with the nudity.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah sure, just long as its handled tastefully and that barnis not too cold.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Terrific! Well uh, theres one more thing. Uhh, uhits really important to the director that everything in this movie is authentic.Yeah and so in your love scene with Sarah she talks about how shes never seen anaked man who wasnt Jewish. So 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 SoWhat?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 So uh well the director is insisting that whoever playthat part be authentically, anatomically not Jewish. Do you know what Im saying?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Yes!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Okay.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 No. What?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 An Italian Catholic immigrant at this time would notbe
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Barmifsaed?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 So to get this part you cant be?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Nope.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 But you are?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Yep.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 But you told them you werent?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Thats right.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Wow! Wow! And its definitely all gone? Theres nothing thereto work with?  What were you thinking?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 I dont know! I really want this part! And they tell you no matterwhat you get asked at an audition you say yes. Like if-if they want you to ride a horse,you tell em you can! And just figure out how to do it later.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Joey! This is not like learning to ride a horse! This is like learningtogrow a turtleneck!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 I kn-I know! I know! Okay? And apparently tomorrow when I go in to meetthe director I have to take off my clothes so that they can see what my body looks like.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Oh my God, what are you gonna do?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 I just have to call my agent and tell her I cant do the part. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Unless!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Unless what?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Well, this may sound crazy, but there maybe something we could fashion.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Like what?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Well Im not sure yet, but umm of the top of my head Imthinking double sided tape and some sort of luncheon meat.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hey! Ive got a great idea for party favors for the shower. Okay,we get some uh mahogany boxes and carve everyones names in them and inside iseveryones individual birth stone.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. All right, you take care of that. And meanwhile, the partyis tomorrow and we still dont have a guest list.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Okay. Okay! Well okay, who do we know thats coming? Me. Are you?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	  Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Hey! Whats up Mon?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Well uh, Im trying to make something for Joey. Do you mind if Iraid your fridge?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Have at it.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Okay.  All right, turkey. Eh, that wont work.Cheese?  That wont work. Olive loaf?  I hope thatwont work.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Are you makin him a sandwich?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 No its umm, more like a wrap. Okay so uh, Im gonna go guys. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe, Rachel	 Okay.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 I guess you can get back to deciding on what to get me for a present!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  We have to get her a present?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Okay but look! Look at what I got! Its her address book!  We have a guest list!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Oh my God youre amazing! Did you just pull that out of her purse?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, and a little seed money for the party. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	  Cassie?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Hey Ross!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Hey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	  Its been so long! Last time I saw you, you were settingup your tent in line to see Return of the Jedi.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Oh. Oh, thats right. So-so you did see me that day because it seemedlike you didnt.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Ah yeah, sorry about that.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Its okay. Come, come on in.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Thanks for letting me stay here! I mean Monicas place was nice,but her fiancee sure stares a lot.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Oh.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Oh my God! You do a great Chandler!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Uh-huh. Yeah I-I have a knack for impressions.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Well, maybe after we get reacquainted uh, you can do me.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 YeahNo!!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Cassie, how you-how you doin on thathot dog.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Im all done.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	  Thank God.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 I guess the last time we really hung out was when our parents rentedthat beach house together.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Oh right. Right. Ooh, remember the time I uh, I pinned you down andtickled you til you cried?  Were probably too old to do that now.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Ill always remember that summer, because its when I got allof these freckles. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	  Uh-huh! Uh-huh! And-and-and Illalways remember that summer because thats when I realized that we are related.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 It took you that long to figure it out, huh?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	 Well Im, Im a little slow.  Just as our childrenwould be.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hi!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 Hi!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 How are you?  Good.  Hi, thanks for coming.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 Oh thank you.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Thank you.  No?  All right.  Oh, its so nice to see you.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 No.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Other Woman	 No thanks.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Okay.  Hey Rach?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Who the hell are all these people?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Well, I dont know. I called all the people in Monicas phonebook and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Hmm, yknow theres another word for people like that. Losers!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Hi! Im Rachel. This is Phoebe. Im the maid ofhonor. How do you know Monica?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 I was her accountant four years ago.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Ohhhh!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 Im very interested to find out whos been doing her taxesthese last four years.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Thats great!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Woman	 So, what time is Monica supposed to get here?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe, Rachel	  I dont know.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	  Excuse us for a minute.  Youdidnt tell her to come?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 You were supposed to tell her!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 No I wasnt! You were supposed to tell her to come and I wassupposed to bring the cake!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Fine, Ill go call her.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Yes! And please tell her to bring a cake!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Okay, we have a lot of options here, a number of prototypes for you totry on.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Wow! This looks great!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Yeah! Okay, this one is a mushroom cap.  Umm, this one ismade of bologna. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 And-and-and-and-and the toothpicks?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Oh, just until the glue dries.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Thank God!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	  Now, these are-are more realistic, but perishable. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Ah.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Okay?  Over here we have pink suede, which isnice. But umm, if it gets wet then you know its gonna shrink.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Well maybe we just take that one away. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 I also, did a little something in fur. But umm, thats really justfor me.  Okay. So, why dont you go into your room andtry these on and well seeget a better idea of whats gonna work.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Thanks, you are such a good friend. And this is so weird.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Ow!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Toothpick?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Yeah.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 What are you trying on now?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 The fruit roll up.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 And?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Delicious.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Joey!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Wait a minute! Wait a minute! We have a winner!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 What?! Which one?!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 The Silly Putty! Its not so silly anymore!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	  Shes your cousin. Shes your cousin! Ifshe knew what was going on in your head shed think you were sick!  Or would she? Lets back up a second. She was the one whosuggested opening a bottle of wine. She was the one who turned down the lights. Shewas the one that wanted to rent Logans Run, the sexiest movie ever.  Oh, I know that look. Forget it. Iwant it. She wants it. Im going in. 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Hey! What the hell are you doing?! 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Ross	  Say something clever!  Okay, doesnthave to be clever, it just has to be words. Say some words.  Any words willdo.  Oh my God! This is the longest that anyone has not talked ever! There is nothing you can say to make this worse!! So just say something!!   I-I, I uh havent had sex in a very long time.   Yeah, you really shouldnt have said anything.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Phoebe! Rachel! Its Monica! I wonder what you could possibly needme for on such short notice!  Oh.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Oh Monica, we are so sorry.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 For what?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Well first, for forgetting to throw you a bridal shower.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 And then for forgetting to invite you to it.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 You al-you already had it?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Yeah. Well, we called everyone in your phone book and bunch of peoplecame, but it took us so long to get you here that they-they had to leave.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Yeah, we wanted to throw you a big surprise and a great shower, and nowyou dont have either.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 We ruined everything.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Ugh
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Well no wait a minute thats not true! No, what did, that wasreally sweet. And it kinda works out for the best.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 What do you, what do you mean?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Monica	 Well now, I get to spend my shower with the only people I really love! Imean, I get all those presents  without having to talkto people I dont even like!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Surprise
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Sur-surprise.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Rachel	 Monica.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 And whats cool is, the character is from Naples, right? 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Director	 Yeah.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 My whole familys from Naples!
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Director	 Oh thats great! Okay, well Ive heard everything I needto hear. I just need to uh, Leslie
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	The Casting Director	 Joey, this is awkward part.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Joey	 Oh! Hey right! Not a problem.  Itotally understand. You need to yknow make sure I dont have any horrible scarsor tattoos. Dont you worry; I have nothing to hide.  So there you go, thats me.  One hundredpercent natural!   I tell ya, that has never happened before.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Cassie, are you finding everything okay in there?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	 Yeah! Thank you so much for letting me stay here.
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	 Oh! No problem! I 
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Cassie	  What?
07	19	0719	The One With Ross And Monica's Cousin	Phoebe	  Say something! Say anything! Ask her out! Shesnot your cousin!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Hey! Out of all of us, who do you think is gonna get married next?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Probably Monica and Chandler.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Woman	  Hi. Could I have a pack of Newport Lights,please?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Gunther	 Oh umm, uh we dont sell cigarettes, but they have them at thenewsstand across the street. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Woman	 Thatd be great, thanks. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. I dont think I havethe energy for this.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  Oh my God! Ray-ray Green?! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Melissa!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 You have been M.I.A for the past seven sorority newsletters,whats up with you?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 WhWhydont I tell you over here? 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 So last I heard you were gonna get married.   Oh poor Ray-ray.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh no-no, no! Its good! Its all good! I-I actually work at RalphLauren!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Shut up!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 I will not! Im the divisional head of mens sportswear!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Oh shut up more! Now, are you friends with Ralph?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh please
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  Are you?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 No.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Listen, we-we have to have dinner. What-what are you doing tomorrownight?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh tomorrow, oh I dont know. Um
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 You do now. Youre having dinner with me.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Shut up.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 I-Ive got to go. This has been so great Ray-ray!  Oh, there you are.   Umm, solisten, just call me. Heres my card. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh, wow thanks!  Oh youre in real estate!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Oh no, thats-thats an old card. Umm, I wanted to get out ofthat and-and do something where I can really help people and-and make a difference.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Wow! What do you do now?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  Im a party planner. Ill see you tomorrow.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Okay! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey guys! Look whos back! Its Ray-ray!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Shut up that was my friend Melissa from college.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 She seems really, really fun!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Shes actually very sweet and we used to be very close.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Wait a minute, she isnt Shes not the one who you
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Who you what? Who you what?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Yes.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Wow!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Wow? Wow what?! Wow what?! Who youwhat?!!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Its not a big deal!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  They were lovers.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 What?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 What?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 No we werent! It was nothing! It was one night, senior year wewent to a party, had a lot of sangria and yknow, ended upkissing for abit.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 So thats two of my wives.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  Okay so this is where theband is.  And this is where the bar is.  And all these pins havepeoples names on them.  AndRach, here you are. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh wow. Why dont we just take me  and put me with aManhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender.  These pins arent for playing are they?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  Okay, the red ones are my guests and the blue ones areyours.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 This is so sad. I mean, I only have like ten pins.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Chandler, relax its not a contest.  Certainly not aclose one.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Hello!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Hey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey Rach.  
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Stop picturing it!!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Okay, I think thats it. The seating chart is done. This is ourwedding. They all look like theyre having fun dont they?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey, so where are my parents gonna be?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Oh!  Lets see, wellif this is the wedding hall thenumm  youre parents will be at home in Queens.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 What theyre not invited?! Oh no, thats terrible! Theyregonna be crushed!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Why would they think theyre invited?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  You got me. I dont
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Joey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Well, Im sorry. I thought parents were coming! Yknow? Yourparents are comin! Chandlers parents are comin! Rosss parents arecomin!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Rosss parents are my parents!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Well-wellsee? Parents are comin!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Yknow I think we should invite them.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Oh please, you just want more blue pins.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Well this is just sad!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 All right, all right. Maybe I can fit them in if I just do somerearranging. But uh, Rachel may actually have to sit at the bar!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 That is not a problem.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Maybe youll order a little sangria?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh, get out of here! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  So now, these are all the tuxedos that we make andif theres anything that you like, we can make you a deal. Anything at all.  But these are the three that Monica pre-approved.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Well, thanks a lot for hookin me up Rach. I want you to knowthat I want you to attend our wedding as my guest.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Im Monicas maid of honor. Okay? Dont try to blue pinme!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	  Well, whats the deal with these? These-theselook nice.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh they are nice. We-we custom-make tuxedos for celebrities and thenwhen theyre done with them they just send em back.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 You mean like for award shows?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Some of them.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 You mean these tuxes have been down the red carpet with peopleyelling, "You are you wearing?! You look fabulous!"
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Honey, might I suggest watching a little more ESPN and a littleless E!?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Okay, who wore those? 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Umm, well lets see uh, this one is Tom Brokaw.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Not bad.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  This one is uh Paul ONeil.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Whos that?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 He plays for the Yankees. Seriously, ESPN! Just once and a while,have it on in the background.  Ooh, this onewas Pierce Brosnan!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Pierce Brosnan?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Are you serious?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 007?! This is James Bonds tux?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Oh, I have to get married in James Bonds tux!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Its a pretty cool tux.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Oh, its not just that, I would be Englands most powerfulweapon. Jet setting heartbreaker on her majestys secret service. A man who fears noone; with a license to kill.  Would Monica let me wear this?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 We should really learn how to play the real way. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 I like our way. Oh!  Chess!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Nice move.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Hey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 So Joey I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for thewedding, do you need one?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 No, Im performing the ceremony. Im not wearing a tux.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Well, what are you going to wear?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Multi-colored robes! Ooh, and maybe a hat.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Huh. Does Monica know about this?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 I dont think so.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Can I please be there when you tell her? 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Hey oh, Rach wait! Do you want to go to a movie tonight?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh, yknow what? I cant. I have to have dinner with thatMelissa girl.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Can I come?! I wont even talk! Youll just hear thenoise from my video camera.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 What is this? Whats going on?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Oh good! Can I tell her?! Can I tell her?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Well, do you want to hear what actually happened or Joeys lewdversion?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Joeys!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Okay
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Hey, come on! I had this friend from college and I made the stupidmistake of telling Joey that one timeshe and I yknowkissed a little bit.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	  Yeah, Im sure that happened.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 It-it did!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Sure!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey.  It happened!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah, it was senior year in college. It was after the Sigma Chi luau andMelissa and I got very drunk! And we ended up kissing! For several minutes! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	  Which means she had a couple spritzers and a quick peck on thecheek.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Why are you taking this away from me?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah, why is it so hard for you to believe?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay! I justI didnt know that you are a lesbian. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Im not saying that Im a lesbian! Im just saying thatthis happened!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, it just seems pretty wild and youre soyknowsovanilla.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Vanilla?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Im not vanilla! Ive done lots of crazy things! I mean Igot-I got drunk and married in Vegas!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 To Ross.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 All right, yknow what? If you dont want to believe me aboutthis, why dont you just come with me to dinner tonight and she will tell you.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay! All right! Yeah! Cause I just cant picture it.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Oh-ho, you should get inside my head.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Hey! Guess what I got for your wedding! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 A freakish thin date with a hanger for her head?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 No. Rachel hooked me up with a tux! But not just any tux, Batmanstux!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 What?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Thats right! Made expressly for Val Kilmer and worn by him in thehit filmthat Batman film he was in.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 You cant wear that! Im wearing the famous tux! JamesBonds tux!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 So?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 SoIf you wear that youll make mine less special.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Well, you need something to make this day special? Hello! You-you-you havethe most special thing of all! You are marrying the woman you love.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Please, dont take away my cool thing. Please?! Pretty please?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Pretty please? Not very uh, 007.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Look, its my wedding day okay? If you were getting married Iwould never do anything to upset you.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 When I got married you slept with my sister.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 That was pretty 007.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Hey.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Hey. Oh good-good youre here! All right, I figured it out.Im gonna take two tables of eight, Im gonna add your parents, and Imgonna turn them into three tables of six. Okay? And I called the caterer; I added twoextra meals, we are good to go!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Yeah, theyre not coming.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  What?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Somehow they got the idea that you only invited them because of me.Theyfeel a little unwanted.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Oh thats too bad. Its true, but too bad.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Look Mon, if you could just call my mom
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Oh Joey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Come on! Look just-just telllet her know that you really want themto be there. Lets not forget, this is a woman that has sent you many lasagnas overthe years.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 No she hasnt.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Is it her fault that some of them didnt make it to you?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Well, what am I going to say?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 I dont know. Just uh, just tell em it was a mix-up with theinvitations, orNo-no-no! Blame it on the post office. They hate the postoffice. And the Irish! But I dont think you can blame it on them so 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  Hello?  Yeah, hi! Mrs. Tribbiani?  Hi, thisis Monica Geller.  Yeah Im just calling to say that Chandler and I uh,really hope you can make it to the wedding. Yeah, apparently a bunch of invitations thatwe sent werent delivered. Umm, I guess there was some screw up at the damn postoffice!   T-Tell me about it!  Yeah, yeah, theUS Post Office? No, more like US lost office!  What are they Irish?! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 anyway, his name is Allan and weve been going out for threeyears. He was my first client when I became a party planner. He was planning a party forhis girlfriend at the time. Oh well.  And he was ThetaBeta Pi at Syracuse.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh. Oh, thats great!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Hmm Phoebe, were you ever in a sorority?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Of course! Yeah, I was uh, umm Thigh Mega Tampon.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 What one?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah! Yknow, we were really huge too, but then they had to shut usdown when Regina Philange died of alcohol poisoning.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Oh, isnt a shame when one girl ruins it for the whole bunch?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Anyway, speaking of drinking too much. I was uh,tellin Phoebe about that one crazy night after the Sigma Chi luau where you and Iuh, we made out.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  What?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Remember?! Wecome on both had the sarongs on, and we had the-thecoconut bikini tops
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Yeah?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 we went back the house and we got really silly and wewe madeout.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Oh wow, Ray-ray I have no idea what youre talking about.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Really?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Ross is Batman!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Well, he did manage to keep his identity secret for a long time.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Rachel got Ross the tuxedo that Val Kilmer wore in Batman. Okay Batmanis so much cooler than James Bond!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 What are you talking about?! 007 has all those gadgets!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Batman has a utility belt!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 007 has a fancy car!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Batman has the Batmobile!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 007 gets all the ladies.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Batman has Robin!  We get ESPN right?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 How about you go put on your 007 tuxedo and Ill make you a nicemartini.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Actually, I dont like martinis.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 How about a Youhoo with a funny straw?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Ooh, yum! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Hey.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Hey.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Listen, I know the invitation says 6:00, but does that mean that you wantpeople to get there at six, or the show is gonna start right at six?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 The show?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Right. Right. The wedding, gotcha. But I mean, its gonna start alittle late right? I mean, weddings start late. Right?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Have you ever been to one of my weddings?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Ah. Yeah. Well look, the thing is its the same day as mynieces christening and I really want my parents to be there in time to see me.Cause my parts just in the beginning Im not even in the rest of theshowWedding!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 The wedding starts at six.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Okay. Okay, I totally hear ya. Oo how about this? I vamp a littletil they get there?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Youll vamp?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah yknow, like warm up the crowd. Ask em wheretheyre from. Cause in Joey Tribbiani you get a minister and you get anentertainer. Im a minis-tainer!  There is no one better! There is no onegreater!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 How can you not remember us kissing?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 I dont know. I dont remember a lot of things that neverhappened.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Wh Come on! Remember? We were on the sleeping porch! Wecouldnt stop giggling? And our coconuts kept knockin together?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh, somewhere Joeys head is exploding.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Yeahbut come onListen, Im sorry I dont want tomake you uncomfortable, but I told Phoebe that it happened and she doesnt believeme.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Im sorry Ray-ray. I mean if I thought it happened I would say it.Maybe I passed out and you did stuff to me while I was sleeping.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 No!!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Rachel, its okay. You dont have to do this. I believe you.All right? Okay, if-if you say that you kissed Melissa, then you kissed Melissa.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Thank you Phoebe.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 She didnt.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 I know.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Hey!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 You just carry that around?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Yes. I find it to be something of a conversation piece. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 Between you and
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Gunther.  Hey-hey! Why dont we put them on? Yknowget a picture of Batman and James Bond together.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 I would but mine doesnt fit. The pants are a little tight.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 A little tight? I could see double-oh and seven in those pants.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Well that stinks. I was looking forward to us wearing our celebrity tuxestogether.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Well, does that mean that youre not going to wearing yours?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 What are you kidding? Its Batmans tux!!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	  Let me try it on!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Okay, but just the jacket. Double-oh and seven are not gettin inthere.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	  Okay. Holy double-vented comfort Batman!  Whats this?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 What?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 An invitation for the At First Sight premiere? Oh my God! ValKilmer didnt wear this in Batman! He wore it to the premiere of some tooty-fruitylove story where he played a blind guy!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Ross	 Let me see that!  Oh man!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 The only superpower you have is a slightly heightened sense of smell.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	  Hey! Uh, Monica? Chandler? Can I talk to you guys for a second?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	 All right thats it, I give up! Whatever you want you can have it!You wanna sing a song? You wanna do a dance? You want your mom stand at the Alter andscream racial slurs? I dont care!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 No! No, I-I just wanna thank you guys for what you did for my parents,that was really sweet. Theyre so happy they get to be a part of your special day.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Monica	  Oh.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Well, youre welcome. And tell them were really gladtheyre coming.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Joey	 Okay. I will. Ohh! Check out what they got me to wear for the ceremony! Huh? I wear it like thiswhen I marry you guys, and then this  is for partytime.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 It happened! I am telling you it happened!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Okay.  Well, it was great meeting you. And uh Rachel, I-Idont think Ill be calling you  because umm, yknowyouve gotten weird.  Take care you guys.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 What?! Wait a minute! No wait a minute!  Okay? Look, thatnight was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and Im notgonna let you take that away from me! Okay, so if you dont remember that, maybeyou will remember this! 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 My God! You love me!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  What?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Of course I remember our kiss. I think about it all the time. I canstill hear the coconuts knockin together I  I justdidnt want to tell you cause I didnt think that youd return mylove, and now that you have 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  Whoa! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	 Aww, look whos being suddenly shy. You cant tell me youdont feel what I feel. Nobody can kiss that good and not mean it. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	  I-I-I-Im justIm just a good kisser!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  Shut up!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Im sorry!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Melissa	  Oh you dont have to be  sorry.ImIm obviously kidding. Im not in love with you. Im not in love with her. I dont hear coconuts banging together. Yeah, Idontpicture your face when I make love to my boyfriend. Anyway, I gotta go.Ehkiss good-bye?  No? Okay. 
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Wow! I mean I had no idea that that was gonna
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 What the hell was that?!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 I just wanted to see what all the fuss was about.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 And?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Phoebe	 Ive had better.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	  All right! I found one that fits!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Well yknow what they say, the 23rd times thecharm.  Aww, look at you all handsome!
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Whose is it?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Oh does it matter?! All that matters is that you look so handsome.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Whose is it?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 I dont want to say.
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Chandler	 Oh, come on! I dont care! Come on! Whose is it?
07	20	0720	The One With Rachel's Big Kiss	Rachel	 Diane Keeton.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Do you realize that four weeks from today were getting married?Four weeks baby!! Four weeks!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Do you realize you get louder each week?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Theres still so much to do. Have you written your vows yet?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 I figured Id buy those. Pat, Id like to buy a vow.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Sweetie, you know I have no sense of humor when it comes to the wedding.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Right. So uh, have you written yours yet?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 No! But I know exactly what Im going to say.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Do you happen to know what Im going to say?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	  Lets just do it right now.Okay? It wont be hard. Just say whats in your heart. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	   Look at her go! She must love memore than I love her! Whats wrong with me? Ooh, dont open that door.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Monica, there are no words  Thereare no words! This should not be this hard!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 All right, uh  Oh hey, youve done this before Ross,well what did you say when you made up your vows?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Well with Carol, I promised never to love another woman until the day Idie. She made no such promise.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Im so pathetic! Monica knows what she wants to say! Youshouldve seen her. Writing, writing, writing!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Monica what? 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 What?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 What is the emergency?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 You have to help me! Im supposed to be writing my vows and all Ihave is this! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Well, I like the pretty little drawing of you in the wedding dress.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Thank you.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Yeah, except your breasts look kinda small. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Those are my eyes! Those are my breasts. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Oh! Yeah! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Well, why dont you just start with something simple. Like umm,Monica from the moment I met you, I knew I loved you.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Yeah, Im not sure I can do that.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 ...everyone, this is Chandler!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Fat Monica	 Hi, I'm Ross's little sister.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Okay.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Okay. Okay. Okay. Umm, maybe you can start with, "Chandler, eventhough we were friends; there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more."
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 All right, theres a nuclear holocaust, Im the last man onEarth. Would you go out with me?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Ennnh.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Ooh, are we allowed to lie in the vows?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Well maybe you dont talk about your feelings back then. Maybe youjust say something about yknow all the things that hes taught you. Like Or all the things youtaught him.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Now everybody knows the basic erogenous zones.  You got one, two three, four , five, six, and seven!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  There are seven?!  Thats one?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Its kind of an important one!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Oh, yknow-yknow what, I was looking at it upside down.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Well, yknow, sometimes that helps. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 All right. Umm, you could uh start out with a little 1, a 2, a 1-2-3, 3,5, a 4, a 3-2, 2, a 2-4-6, 2-4-6, 4,  2, 2, 4-7, 5-7,6-7, 7 7..77-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7-7! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Oh, I got it! How about saying something like, "Monica
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Monica
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 "when I look back over our time together"
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Yeah?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Well, I cant do everything! Look back over your time together.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Oh, look, twins. Hi, guys. Oh, cute, cute.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 No fair. I don't even have one. How come they get two?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 You'll get one.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Oh yeah? When?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 All right. I'll tell you what. When we're 40, if neither one of us aremarried, what do you say you and I get together and have one?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Why won't I be married when I'm 40?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Oh, no, no. I just meant hypothetically.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Ok, hypothetically, why won't I be married when I'm 40?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 No, no, no.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 What is it? Is there something fundamentally unmarriable about me?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Uh, uh.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Well?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Dear God! This parachute is a knapsack! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  Im getting marriedtoday!! Ahh, whoo-hoo!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	  Do you think he knew I was here? 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Nice try.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Wait, wait, wait! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Look, Monica
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Look! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 This is not going to work.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 I bet this will work! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 You are so great! I love you!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 What?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Nothing! I said, I said "You're so great" and then I just, Ijust stopped talking!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 You said you loved me! I can't believe this!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 No I didn't!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Yes, you did!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 No I didn't!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 You love me!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 No I don't! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Yknow I was thinking, what if I uh, unpack here?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Then all your stuff would be here.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Well, what if all my stuff was here?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Then youd be going back and forth all the time, I mean itdoesnt make any sense.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay. What if we lived together and you understand what Imsaying?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 You wanted it to be a surprise.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Oh my God.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Chandler In all my life I never thought I would be so lucky. As tofall in love with my bestmy best Theres areason why girls dont do this!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay!  Okay! Okay! I'll do it!  Oh God,I thought  Wait a minute, I-I can do this.  Ithought that it mattered what I said or where I said it. Then I realized the only thingthat matters is that you,  you make me happier than I ever thought I could be. And if youll let me, I will spend the rest of my lifetrying to make you feel the same way.  Monica, will youmarry me?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Yes.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  Can we come it yet?! Were dying out here!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Come in! Come in! Were engaged!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Hey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Hey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Hey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Hey, what have you guys been up to?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Oh, we were helping Chandler write his vows, but he kicked us out becauseJoey kept making inappropriate suggestions.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 How is "Monica, I love your sweet ass," inappropriate?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Hows Monica coming along with her vows?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Well lets just say its shes lucky she has a sweet ass,cause shes not so good at the writing.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 I cant believe in four weeks theyre gonna be married!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Well lets just hope it works. Yknow nine out of tenmarriages end in divorce?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Phoebe thats not true.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Yeah, youre right. Hows the Mrs.?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 I cant believe theyve been together for three years.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  Has it been that long?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Believe me, it seems like less because they hid it from us for so long.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Hey, it's me! I'm comin' in!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 I've had a very long, hard day.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Ahh, I'm gonna go get some chicken. Want some?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Ahh, no thanks. No chicken, bye-bye then.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Okay.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Are you okay? I'm so sorry, he wouldn't leave. He kept asking me aboutchicken.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Chicken? I could eat some chicken.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Hey Joe!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Yeah, can I get a 3-piece, some cole slaw, some beans, and a CokeDiet Coke.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 I dont know why they didnt just tell us.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 I know! I mean its not like we werent cool about it.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  You?!  And-and you?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Yes, but you cannot tell anyone! No one knows!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 How?! When?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 It happened in London.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 IN LONDON!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 The reason we didn't tell anyone was because we didn't want to make abig deal out of it.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 But it is a big deal!! I have to tell someone! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 No-no-no-no-no! You can't!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Please? Please?! We just don't want to deal with telling everyone, okay?Just promise you won't tell.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 All right! Man, this is unbelievable!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	  I can't wait to be with you!  I'll just tell Rachel I'mgonna be doing laundry for a couple of hours.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Laundry. Huh. Is that my new nickname? 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	  Awww, y'know what your nickname is, Mr. Big
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Arghh!! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	  Oh, look! There's Monica and Chandler!  Hey! Hey, you guys! Hey!  Ohh!! Ohh! Ahh-ahhh!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 What?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	  Ahhh!! Chandler and Monica!! Chandler and Monica!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Oh my God!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 CHANDLER AND MONICA!!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 OH MY GOD!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 OH!! MY EYES!!! MY EYES!!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Phoebe!! Phoebe!! It's okay!! It's okay!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 NO! THEY'RE DOING IT!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 I KNOW!! I KNOW!! I KNOW!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 YOU KNOW?!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Yes, I know! And Joey knows! But Ross doesn't know so you have to stopscreaming!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  What's going on?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe, Rachel	 Ohhh!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 HI!! Hi! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 What?! What?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Nothing! Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get thisapartment!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Actually, it looks really good. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	  Get in here!!! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Okay, so now they know that you know and they don't know that Rachelknows?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Yes, but y'know what? It doesn't matter who knows what. Now, enough of usknow that we can just tell them that we know! Then all the lying and the secrets wouldfinally be over!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Or, we could not tell them we know and have a little fun of ourown
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Bye!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	All	 Bye!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Bye Chandler!   I miss you already. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  Okay, did you see that?! With the inappropriateand the pinching!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Actually, I did!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay, so now do you believe that she's attracted to me?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Ohhh, oh my God! Oh my God! She knows about us!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Phoebe knows about us!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Well I didn't tell them!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Them?! Who's them?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Uhhh, Phoebe and Joey.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Joey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 And Rachel. I would've told you but they made me promise not to tell!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Oh man, they think they are so slick messing with us! But seethey don't know that we know that they know! So
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Ahh yes, the messers become the messies!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 I'll have to get back to you on that. Okay, bye!  Oh my God!He wants me to come over and feel his bicep and more!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Are you kidding?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 No!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 I can not believe he would do that to MonWhoa!  Joey, do they know that weknow?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 No.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Joey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 They know you know.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Ugh, I knew it! Oh I cannot believe those two!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 God, they thought they can mess with us! They're trying to mess withus?! They don't know that we know they know we know!  Joey,you can't say anything!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 I couldn't even if I wanted too.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Listen, this is totally getting out of hand! Okay? She wants me to putlotion on her! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 She's bluffing!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Look, she's not backing down! She went like this! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 He's not backing down. He went to get lotion.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  Oh man! Aren't you guys done yet?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandlerthe sooner this is all over and out in the open.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Ooh!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Okay!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 I like that!  Oh, okay! Show him your bra! He's afraid of bras!Can't work 'em! 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Joey!  Wow, you didnt rip off any buttons.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 It's not my first time.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 You go back out there and you seduce her till she cracks!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay, give me a second!  Did you clean up in here?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Of course.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Oh, you're-you're going?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Umm, not without you, lover.  So, this is my bra.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	  It's very, very nice. Well, come here. I'm veryhappy were gonna have all the sex.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 You should be. I'm very bendy.  I'm gonna kiss you now.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Not if I kiss you first.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Ooh.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Well, I guess there's nothing left for us to do but-but kiss.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Here it comes. Our first kiss.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay! Okay! Okay! You win! You win!! I can't have sex with ya!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 And why not?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Because I'm in love with Monica!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 You're-you're what?!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Love her! That's right, ILOVEHER!!! I love her!!  I love you, Monica.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 I love you too Chandler. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 I justI thought you guys were doing it, I didn't know you were inlove!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  So that's it! It's over! Everybody knows!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Well actually, Ross doesn't.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Yes, and we'd appreciate it if no one told him yet.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  No! No! Wh What are youdoing?!!  GET OFF MY SISTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Yknow, youre friends getting married, its gottachange things.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 You really think it would be that different?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 How could it not be? I mean pretty soon theyre gonna be havingkids, and then theyre just gonna be hanging out with other couples who have kids.And then maybe theyre gonna have to leave the city to be near a Volvodealership.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Well, things change.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 I dont want them to move to a Volvo dealership!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Itll be okay Joe.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Im sorry, I justI like things the way they are.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Hey, who's this little naked guy?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 That little naked guy would be me.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Aww, look at the little thing.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Yes, yes, fine, that is my penis. Can we be grown-ups now?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Who are those people?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Got me.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Oh, that's Nana, right there in the middle.  'Me and thegang at Java Joe's'. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. How old was she there?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Let's see, 1939... yeah, 24, 25?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Looks like a fun gang. 
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Ooh, look-look-look-look-look! I got Monica naked!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  Nono, that would be me again.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Hey, you guys!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Hey.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Hey.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Whats going on?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Well, we were just talkin about you guys gettin married andhow great it is.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Yeah, you can get a Volvo. If thats what you really want.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Oh thats so sweet.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 So we both finished our vows.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Oh!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 Hey!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Oh, can we read them?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Yeah, I dont hear Chandlers and he doesnt hear mine.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	 Okay.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	 Okay.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Phoebe	  Oh, thats beautiful.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	   Funny one! Thats good!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Rachel	  Monica, will-will you marry me?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 What? I dont get it.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  Oh man, this is hilarious.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Monica	 Chandler!!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Dont worry honey, well make yours funnier.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 Okay, what do you guys think?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	  Dude!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	  I have never known love like this.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 You really like it?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 Dude! How-how did you write this?
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Chandler	 I stole Monicas and changed the name.
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Ross	 You cant do that!
07	21	0721	The One With The Vows	Joey	 If he goes first he can!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Hey uh Mon, I saw the Porsche parked out front, can I get the keys?Thought Id take that bad boy out for a little spin.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Wait a minute!  You let Ross drive the Porsche andwhen I ask you, you say youre the only one whos allowed to drive it.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Yeah, well hes my brother! And plus he drives so slow he couldnever hurt it.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Its a car Monica! Not a rocket ship!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Whatever Ross! Just replace the bulbs in the brake lights afteryoure done.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	  Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Saw the Porsche out there Mon, lookin good. When do I get to takethat baby out again?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	  You let Joey drive it?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Ive never driven it! Okay? Not once! Okay once. Okay, I drive itall the time.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Nice work everybody! So much for the yknow, "You can driveit, but dont tell Rachel" plan!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Wow! I cant believe you lied to me.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Okay, I can fix this! Okay Monica, Rachel thinks all you can talk aboutis the wedding. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Great! Well Rachel, the reason why I wont let you drive thePorsche is because youre a terrible driver. There! That wasnt about thewedding.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Look Rach if-if you want to go for a ride in the Porsche Ill be gladto take you for a quick spin around the block.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah, you got a couple hours?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Whew! That was a brisk ride!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Take the top down did ya?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Only way to fly.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Come on Ross give me the keys! Monica does not know whatshes talking about! I am an excellent driver!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Youre fast and irresponsible. That adds up to a bad driver.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Did you see the look that girl just gave me? Huh? She mustve seen mecruising in the bad boy.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I think shes checking out your beehive Ross.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 What?!  Give-give me a brush.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Gimme the keys!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 No way!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Well no brush!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Fine! Yknow what? It doesnt matter, because, if I remembercorrectly, there is a comb on the floor of the bathroom. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	  Alimony. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Chandler, we still havent gotten an RSVP from your dad.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Oh! Right. Umm, maybe thats because I didnt send him aninvitation.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Chandler! Hes your father; he should be at the wedding.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 I dont even know the man. Okay? Were not the close. Ihavent seen him in years.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Well what are you gonna do when he finds out he wasnt even asked?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Well he doesnt have to know! Its not like we run in thesame circles. I hang out with you guys, and he stars in a drag show in Vegas.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Ooh, I think I wanna trade circles.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Trust me, you dont want him there either. Okay? Nobody is gonnabe staring at the bride when the father of the groom is wearing a back-less dress.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 So what! As long as hes not wearing a white dress and a veil Idont care.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Okay, I think I need to do some shopping. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Ahhh!  Ooh, nice!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 My God!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 What do you think youre doing?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Just washing the windshield. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 There is no way I am letting you drive this car! So why dontyou just hand over the keys?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 No ah-ah-ah! Do not start this car!  Okay!Okay! I will give you twenty bucks if you get out of this car right now! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Look Ross, if youre so freaked out, just get in the car!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 With you?! Yeah right!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 All right. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	  Okay! Okay! Okay! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 What are you doing?! Get in the front!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 In the death seat?!!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh my
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	 Hey guys!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey sweetie!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	 Ready to go?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah! Sure! Ooh, I left my purse up at Monicas. Ill be rightback. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	  Wait a minute!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 What?  Oh.  Ooh. Whoa! That one kept going. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 So! You and Phoebe huh? How long have you been going out?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	 Over a month.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Wow! Maybe uh, maybe you and I ought to get to know each other a littlebetter.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	 Sure, Id like that.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 So uh, whats your name?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Man	  Its Jake.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Joey.  Hey Jake, do you like the Knicks?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Jake	 Yeah, big fan.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Me too! Theres a game on Tuesday do you wanna go?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Jake	 Yeah that would be great! Let me make sure Im not doing anythingTuesday. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Here! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Whats this?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Its your suitcase. Were going to Las Vegas.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Are you serious?! I mean like eloping?! No more stupid wedding stuff?!No more these flowers or these flowers or these flowersThink of the money wellsave!!  Were not eloping. I love the flowers. Can ourwedding be bigger please?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Were going to Las Vegas to see your dad. Its time you twotalked, and I want to get to know my father-in-law.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Yknow we already went over this and I won!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 No you didnt. Oh and honey just so you know, now that youremarrying me, you dont get to win anymore.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Look forget it okay? I dont want to go. I dont want to seehim. I dont wanna.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Chandler, look I-I know that your dad embarrassed you. I know
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 No-no all kids are embarrassed by their parents, youdhave to come up with a whole new word for what I went through. When I was in High School,he used to come to all of my swim meets dressed as a different Hollywood starlet.Yknow its hard enough to be fourteen. Youre skinny. Youre wearingspeedoesThat your mom promised that you would grow into! And you look up into thestands and theres your dad cheering you on dressed as Carmen Miranda. We was wearinga headdress with real fruit that he will later hand out to your friends as ahealthy snack!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Hey, the point is that he was at everyone of your swim meets and he wasthere cheering you on! Okay? Thats a, thats a pretty great dad.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 He had sex with Mr. Girabaldi!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Whos Mr. Girabaldi?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Does it matter?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Chandler, youre not fourteen anymore. Okay? Maybe its timethat you let that stuff go. If your fathers not at your weddingyouregonna regret it for the rest of your life.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah o-okay, but Im just doing this for you.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Yes!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 So I really never get to win anymore?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 How much did ever really win before?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Pheebs!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Listen, you know how uh, when youre wearing pants and you leanforward I check out your underwear?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Well, when Jake did it I saw thathe was wearing womensunderwear!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 I know. They were mine.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Oh.  No! No wait, thats weird!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 No, its not! We were just goofing around and I dared him to trythem on.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Thats weird!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Im wearing his briefs right now.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Thatskinda hot.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 I think so too. And that little flap? Great for holding my lipstick.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah, I wouldnt know about that.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 And! Yknow what Jake says? That womens underwear is actuallymore comfortable. And he loves the way the silk feels against his skin.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah well next thing you know, hell be telling you that your highheels are good for his posture!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 There is nothing wrong with Jake! Okay? He is all man! Im thinkingeven more than you.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Oh yeah, he looked like a real lumberjack in those pink laceys.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Im just saying that only a man completely secure with hismasculinity could walk around in womens underwear! I dont think you could everdo that.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Hey! I am secure with my masculinity.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Okay whatever.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Youve seen my huge stack of porn right? 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 God. I forgot how much I love driving. I have got to get mylicense renewed.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	  You dont have a valid driverslicenseOkay that is it! Pull over right now!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh Ross youre so tense! You just gotta relax okay? Just need torelax all right? Just need to relax 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	  What-what are you doing?! Are youOkaythats not funny! Just stop horsing around!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I am not horsing around okay? I am Porsching around.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Uh-oh. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Okay, stay calm. Nothing is going to happen to you, you are not in thatmuch trouble.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Really? You think so?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 I was talking to myself! Youre going down!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	A Waiter In Drag	  Has someone taken your order yet?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Uh oh yeah, she did. Uh, he did.  She? Im-Im sorry Im new. I dont
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Waiter In Drag	  Hm-mmm?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, I just ordered a beer! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Waiter In Drag	 Youre straight. I get it. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 I still say that if we had called your dad we coulda gotten betterseats.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 No! No! I dont want him to know were yet! Im notsure Im ready for that. And besides hes not gonna be too happy to see meeither.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Why not?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 I dont know if Ive told you this, but hes kindatried to get in contact with me a lot over the last few years
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 What?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah, hes made phone calls, written letters, he even came to NewYork, but I always said I was too busy to see him. Yknow its all very Catsin the CradleI dont want to get into it.  Here we go.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Announcer	 Ladies and gentlemen please welcome the incomparable Helena Handbasket!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Hello darlings.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 And theres daddy!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Okay. Switch places with me! Switch places with me! Come on! Illgo under, you go over!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Yeah, Ill get right on that.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh come on Ross!! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 No Rach! Come on! No-no! Yeah, Im sure we wont get arrestedfor this.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	  Hi officer, was I going a little too fast?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Oh my God.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Can I see your license please?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh yes, absolutely! Yknow, its weird uh, but I had a dreamlast night where I was stopped by a policeman. And then he uhwell I probablyshouldnt tell you the rest.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Your license?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	  Yes. Here you go Officer uh, Handsome.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Thats Hanson.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oops sorry, my mistake.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Dear Lord!!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Wow!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Here it comes.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 This is a great picture.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Really?! You think so? Yknow, I had just rolled out of bed.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Yeah? Well you look phenomenal.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Well she should, it was taken ten years ago!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Yknow youre-youre probably wondering about the olddate on there.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Yes I am.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Yeah.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Youre an Aquarius, huh?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I bet youre a Gemini. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Nope.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Taurus?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Nope.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Virgo?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Nope.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Sagittarius?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Yep.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I knew it! I knew it, ahh.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Well I tell you what
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Yeah?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Youre not gonna speed anymore right?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I wont speed.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 And you promise youll get this taken care of right away?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 I promise.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 And in the meantime you better let him drive. Does he have a license?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Yeah!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Can he handle the stick?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh well
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 I can handle the stick!!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 I feel pretty. Oh so pretty. I feel pretty and witty and
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	All	 Gay!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 That cant be your father.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Believe me, Ive been saying that for years. Oh my God!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 What?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Thats Mr. Girabaldi playing the piano.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	  For Im loved by a pretty wonderful boy! Hello! And welcome to the show. I see some of our regulars in the audience.And a couple of irregulars. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Hes coming into the audience. Hes coming into theaudience.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Relax! Youll be fine.  Oh much better. Youre invisible now.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	  Where are youfrom?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Guy	 Bakersfield.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Im sorry? 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Guy	 Bakersfield!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 No-no I heard! Im just sorry.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 It cant happen like this. Okay? Ill meet you back at thehotel.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	  Oh look, a standing ovation already! So earlyin the show. Oh turn around honey; let me see your pretty face. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Can we have our drinks please?! WaiterUh, tress!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Hey Pheebs! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Hey!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Check it out.  How much of a man am I?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yknow, Im beginning to see what Jake was talking about.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 The silk? Feels really good!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Huh.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah! And-and things arent assmashed down as I thought theywere gonna be.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Thats great Joe!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah! And you have so many more choices than you do withmens underwear!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Bikini, French cut, thong! And-and the fabrics! Youve got cotton,silk, lace! And yknow what Ive always wondered about?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Hmm?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Pantyhose! Yknow? They way they start at your toe and go all the wayup to here  I should gotake these off shouldnt I?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 I think its important that you do.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 So whats your name?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	  Chandler. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Chandler? What an unusual name! You mustve had terribly fascinatingparents.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Oh, theyre a hoot.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	  And who is your friend?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 Im-Im Monica.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Monica! Where are you from?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	 New York.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Im not very fond of New York. Queens I like.  Ooh, what is this sparkle something!  Honey! Huh?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Actually Monica and I are engaged.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Really?! Congratulations. Whens the big day?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	  Inin two weeks.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	  I see. Well, I wish you both a lifetime ofhappiness.  So youre bald?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Wait! Wait! Wed really love it if you could be there.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 We? 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 I know it would make me happy, maam.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Well I wouldnt miss it for the world. Oh! Im getting allmisty here! Youd think I was having my legs waxed or something. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Monica	  You okay?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	 Yeah. Thanks for making me do this.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Before we go on with the show, I just want to say to the bride and groomhow lucky they are to have found each other. In every life, a little rain must fall.Fortunately, in my life   Its raining men! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	The Chorus Line	 Hallelujah! 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Helena	 Its raining men!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	The Chorus Line	 Amen!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Chandler	  When I was growing up Iplayed the one on the farleft.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Remind me to introduce you to someone!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Who?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Fourth gear!!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 What?! What does he want?! I wasnt doing anything!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Well maybe he saw your hand slip briefly from the ten and twooclock position.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Maybe its uh Sergeant Sagittarius coming back to flirt some more!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Its a different guy!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Good evening officer.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Do you know how fast you were traveling back there?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Ah no. I dont, but it could not have been more than sixty.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Youre right. It was 37. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 I mean youre not gonna give me a-a ticket for driving too slow areya?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Thats right.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 Yknow of-officer I uhI had the weirdest dream last night
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	 Oh my God!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Your license please.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	  You dont-you dont want to hear about my dreamOfficerPretty?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Policeman	 Its Petty.  Ill be rightback with your ticket. 
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Rachel	  You have a son!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Ross	 I know. I know.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Feel better?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah! Much! Listen uh, not that Im yknow insecure about mymanhood or anything yknow, but I think I need to hook up with a woman like rightnow.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Phoebe	 Yeah, I understand.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah! Okay!  Hey! Hi!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Woman	 Hi!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yknow, you look familiar. Do I know you from somewhere?
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Woman	 I dont think so.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Oh! Maybe its because Im on television. Im an actor on Daysof Our Lives.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Woman	 Wow!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Yeah.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Woman	 Really?!
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Hm-mmm.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Waitress	  $4.50 please.
07	22	0722	The One With Chandler's Dad	Joey	 Oh, let me get this.    These are for you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Do you realize this is probably the last time well all be here inthe coffee house as six single people?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Why?! Whats happening to the coffee house?! Oh! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yep! From now on its gonna be the four of you guys and me and themisses. The little woman. The wife. The old ball and chain.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Old?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 The young hot ball and chain.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Thats much better.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Op! We gotta go! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, where are you guys going?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Were gonna pick up the wedding dress then were gonna havelunch with mom. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ah. Joey youre-youre having lunch with my mom?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, I-I just heard lunch. But yeah, I can go. Sure! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Yknow what? Actually Im kinda glad theyreleaving cause uh, I need to talk to you about something.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Whats up?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well this uh, this may be a little awkward.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Listen, if you want to borrow money, its kind of a bad time. Imbuying dinner for 128 people tomorrow night.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No, itsIts not that. Umm, now what Im going to say to you,Im not saying as your friend. Okay? Im-Im saying as it asMonicas older brother.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But youre still my friend?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Not for the next few minutes.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 During this timeare you, are you still my best man?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Nope.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Do I still call you Ross?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay! You guys are getting married tomorrow and-and I couldnt bemore thrilled for both of you, but as Monicas older brother I-I have to tell youthis. If you ever hurt my little sister, if you ever cause her any unhappiness of anykind, I will hunt you down, and kick your ass!  What?Im-Im-Im serious!  ComeHey! Dude! Stopit! Okay? Im-Im not kidding here!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hey, I hear what your saying, okay? And, thanks for thewarning.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No problem.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So are wefriends again?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay.  You wont believe what Monicas olderbrother just said to me!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What cha doing Mon?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Im making a list of all the things that are most likely to gowrong at the wedding. Now, that way I can be prepared.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What are they?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, so far I have uh, my brides maids dresses wont getpicked up, my veil gets lost, or I dont have my something blue.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hey! Those are all the things Im responsible for!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I had to go with the odds Rach.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey! You guys! Remember that audition I had a while ago anddidnt get the part?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 The commercial?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 That play?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 That other play?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Nooo!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 The movie?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yes!!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohh!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yes thats the one about the soldiers who fight in World War I!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah! Back then yknow, we called the Great War. It really was!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well anyway, the guy they wanted backed out and now they want me! I startshooting today!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Congratulations!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh thats great!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Wait! Wait! Wait! You cant start today! Todays the rehearsaldinner!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh no, Ill be done by then.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh. Well then way to go you big movie star!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know! All right, Ill see you guys over there! Im off tofight the Nazis.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, wait Joey! We fought the Nazis in World War II, not World War I.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Whoa! Okay. Yeah well, who-who was in World War I? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Go ahead.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Youre gonna be late! Go! Go! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Who did we fight in World War I?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Mexico?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yes! Very good.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Assistant Director	  Hey Joey! Were ready.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! Me too. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Assistant Director	  Richard? Were ready for you. Joey Tribbiani? This is Richard Crosby hes playing Vincent.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Im doing my scenes with you?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Nice to meet you Joey.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wow! I cant believe this! This is incredible. I mean you just won anOscar!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 No I didnt.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I think you did.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 I think I lost. Three times.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 UhCookie?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	  Okay! Were about an hour away from getting thescene lit. So uh, if you guys dont mind, can we run it a couple of times?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Yeah, sure.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Okay, all right. Lets do it. AndAction!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 We have to find the rest of the platoon!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Forget the platoon! The platoon is gone! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  What?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	  The platoon is dead! Face facts Tony!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  So what are we gonna do?! We have no reinforcements! No-nofood!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 No, we still have food in the basement! I saw potatoes and some drypasta!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Hang on a minute! Joey, you keep touching your face. Is somethingwrong?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  No. Nope, I uhI thI thought it might bekind of a cool character thing. Yknow? Hes uh, hes a face toucher.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 I dont think so. Lets take it back to Richardslast line.  Action!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 We may not have any weapons, but we still have food. In the basement Isaw potatoes and some dry pasta, and a few tins of tuna! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Honey, we gotta go!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Okay. Heres a question you neverhave to ask. My dad just called and wanted to know if he could borrow one of your pearlnecklaces.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  I dont have anything like that, but let me go see ifRachel does.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes, include more people in this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey, do you realize that at this time tomorrow well be gettingmarried?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wait a minute! I have a date tomorrow night.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I just, I cant believe that we made it!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well you dont have to sound so surprised.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Im sorry butnothing.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Wellhonestly ever since we got engaged I have been waiting forsomething to, to flip you out.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Honestly? Me too.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Really?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah. Yknow I keep thinking that something stupid is gonna comeup and Ill go allChandler. But nothing has.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ohh, Im so glad. Thank you so much for staying so calm duringthis. I mean its really, its made me stay calm. I coulda been worse!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. Ill be right there.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Hi! If youre calling before Saturday,youve reached Monica and Chandler. But if youre calling after Saturday,youve reached Mr. and Mrs. Bing! Please leave a message for the Bings!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey Maureen!  Gosh! Hey uh, Chandler? This is my cousinMaureen.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Were the Bings.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi! Oh you guys look so beautiful!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Mr. and Mrs. Bing! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Wow Monica! Hey, just so you know I had my uh, older brotherchat with Chandler.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 What is that?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well II told him that if he ever hurt you I would hunt him down andkick his ass!  What?! What?! What is the matter with everybody?! Iam serious! I would kick his ass! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ross, please! My make-up! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hi.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Chandler!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Mom. Thanks for wearing something.  
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Oh honey! This is so exciting! I thought we screwed you up so badthis day would never come. Oh and just think. Soon therell be lots of little Bings. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Mrs. Bing? Here, these are my parents umm, Judy and Jack Geller.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	  Its lovely to meet you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	  So are you his mother or his father?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Jack!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 What?! Ive never seen one before!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Dad! Theres Ross , why dont you go talk to him?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 I didnt even have a chance to act as though Im okay withit!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Bing	  Hello all!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hidad.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hi Mr.Bing.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Bing	 Nora!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Charles.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 It-its so great to see you both here.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Bing	 Yes! Although, I think we may be seeing a little too much of somepeople. Arent you a little old to be wearing a dress like that?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Dont you have a little too much penis to be wearing a dresslike that?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh my God! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 of course you can kick his ass son.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 You could kick anyones ass you want too.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thanks you guys. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, Rach! Rach! Umm hey, could you do me a favor and would talk toChandlers dad and try to keep him away from Chandlers mom?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah! But I dont know what he looks like!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 He is the man in the black dress.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Man in the black dress   Hi! Im Rachel! Im a friend ofMonica and Chandlers!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Woman	 Im Amanda.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh I get it! Amanduh!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Can I have everyones attention please?Im uh; Im Ross Geller.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Doctor Ross Geller.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Daddad, please! As I was saying umm, Im Dr. Ross Geller. Uhh,and Im the best man. And uh, this marriage is doubly special for me umm, because notonly is the groom my best friend but uh, the bride is my little sister. And, shesthe greatest sister a guy could ask for. So if youd all please join me in raising aglass to the, the couple were here to celebrate.  To the Bings.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	All	 To the Bings!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 All right, Im gonna go steam my wedding dress okay? Who wants theresponsibility of making sure nothing happens to it?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ill do it.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Who wants it? Anybody?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I said Ill do it!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Nobody wants to do it? All right, Ill do it myself.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Monica! Im not gonna screw it up!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yknow what? Youre right, Im sorry. Actually you were abig help tonight. Yeah, and thanks for putting my grandmother in the cab and making sureshe got to the hotel safely.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well of course that is what Im here for!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay. Sorry. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ugh!  What grandmother?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey! Where have you been?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, taking my parents back to the hotel.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? Are you going back to work?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Nice shades.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thanks. Yeah, I figure if I wear these in my scenes at least I wontget spit in the eyes, yknow?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 And if I remember correctly, Ray Ban was the official sponsor ofWorld War I!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Great! All right. Ill see you later. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey, wheres Chandler?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, I think hes in Rachels room. See ya. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Chandler?  Chandler? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Is uh, is Monica here?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Shes steaming her dress, why? Whats up?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I think Chandlers gone. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 He left that.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Tell Monica Im sorry.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Whats up?  Tell Monica Im sorry.  Tell her yourself!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Chandler just left though!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah but, maybe its not what we think. Maybe its tell MonicaIm sorry Idrank the last of the milk.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Or maybe he-he was writing to tell her that-that hes changed hisname, yknow? Tell Monica Im sorry.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 I think it means he freaked out and left!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Dont be so negative! Good God! Isnt it possible that Sorryis sitting in there  right now?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Phoebe, I-I think Ross is right. What are we gonna do?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 LookOkay, Im just gonnaIm gonna have to go findhim and bring him back! Okay? You-you make sure Monica does not find out, okay?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Okay but if you dont find him and bringhim back, I am gonna hunt you down and kick your ass!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  I will, I will find him.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Hey Joey, could you uh, go through these lines with me? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh man! They-they just redid my make-up!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Just the last two pages.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 I found the picture! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Picture? What picture?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Could you uh, could you lower your script? I need to see your face so Ican uh, play off your reaction.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay uh, look I know youre a great actor, okay? And you play allthose Shakespeare guys and stuff
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Oh, thanks.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 But youre spittin all over me man!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Well of course I am!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 You know youve been spitting on me?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Thats what real actors do! Annunciation is the mark of a goodactor! And when you enunciate, you spit!  
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Wow! Didnt know that.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Great!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thanks! Okay-okay check it out!  Picture? Whatpicture?  Eh?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Gunther have you uh, have you seen Chandler?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Gunther	 No. No, I havent seen him.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh damn!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Gunther	 Hes getting married tomorrow right?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes. Yes. Dont worry. Everythings fine. Well uh,well see you tomorrow at the wedding.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Gunther	 I wasnt invited.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well then well-well see you the day after tomorrow.  Mom?! Dad?! What-whatwhat you guys doing here?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Well you kids talk about this place so much, we thought wedsee what all the fuss is about.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 I certainly see what the girls like coming here.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Why?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 The sexy blonde behind the counter. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Gunther?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Your mother just added him to her list.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? Your-your list?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Yeah, the list thatof people were allowed tosleep
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes! No-no! I know, I know what the list is! Mom! Look if you seeChandler, could you just let him know Im looking for him?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 And if you see Rita Moreno, let her know Im looking for her.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Action!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 I found the picture!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 What picture?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 The picture of my wife! In your pack!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 You went through my personal property?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Why do have a picture of Paulette in your pack?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Because Vincent, we were lovers.  For two years!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Cut! Wonderful!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Great scene yeah?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Oh youre awesome! And, in that last speech? You soaked me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thanks a lot.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Assistant Director	  Heres your call sheet for tomorrow.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, Im-Im not working tomorrow.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Assistant Director	 You are now.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No! No! I cant! You gotta get me out of it! Ive got plans! Important plans! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Ross said theres still no word from Chandler.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh man.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh but he did say that they found the grandmother wandering down fifthavenue.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Well theres one down.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Im getting married today!!!  I think I just cracked a rib. But I dont carebecause todays my wedding day! My day is finally here!! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yknow she might not even notice hes gone.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Im gonna start getting ready! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 God! DontWe cant let her start getting ready! This istoo awful! Oh God, but wait shell be in the gown and then he wont show up andthen shes gonna have to take off the gown
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Shhh! Stop it! Stop it Rachel! You cant do this here! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Im sorry. Im sorry. Its justIts just sosad!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, but youve got to pull yourself together! Monica cantsee you like this! Then shell know somethings wrong!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I know. I know. Oh God.  Theres no tissue! Can yougrab me some toilet paper?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah.  Oh, thats gone too. This is Monicasbathroom right?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No-no! I-II found one.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh thank you!  Oh God!  Can I haveanother one?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Sure.  Do youneed some floss? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh God I just can not imagine what is gonna happen if Chandlerdoesnt show up!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh heres a whole bunch.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, I mean shes gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and peoplewill be whispering, "Oh that poor girl." Yknow? Then shell have tocome back here and live all alone.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh my God!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 There was a pregnancy test in the garbage, and its positive.Monicas pregnant.  So I guess she wont be totallyalone.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh my God!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know! Monicas gonna have a baby! Hey, can this count as hersomething new?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh my God!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey, do you think this is why Chandler took off?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, she had to have just taken that test because I took out the trashlast night.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh God, this is turning into the worst wedding day ever! The bride ispregnant. The groom is missing. And Im still holding this. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay Phoebe, we can not tell anyone about this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Right.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay. Hey, wait. Do you know what kind of birth control she wasusing?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No. Why?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Just for the future, this is hardly a commercial for it.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Anything?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! I talked to Joey on the set, he hasnt heard from him. I-I-Italked to Chandlers parents again!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You told them he was missing?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! I made it seem like I was just calling to chat. Pretty sure, they boththink Im interested in them.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right, weve got to tell her hes gone. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! Hey! Hey! We cant!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross, shes gonna start getting ready soon!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, cant you at least stall her a little? Ill-Ill goback to some of the places I went last night.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right, well how much time do you need?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well how much time before she absolutely has to start getting ready?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 One hour.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Give me two.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Then why do you ask?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay, wish me luck.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Im going with you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Why?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ross, youre tired. Youve been looking all night. And clearlyyou suck at this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right, Ill see you guys later.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Wait, do you know how youre going to stall her?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ill figure something out.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right. Good luck.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thanks.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey! Okay, so I thought wed start with my make up and then do myhair.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay uh, but before you do that. I-I, I need you to talk to me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 About what?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Umm Im never gonna getting married!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah you will! The right guy is just around the corner! Okay, are wedone with that?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No Monica! Im serious! Oh, maybe I should just forget about it.Become a lesbian or something.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Any woman would be lucky to have ya.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well maybe it would make me feel better if I slept with Joey.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Rachel! You okay?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Excuse me, Aaron?  Hi! Umm, I have a littleproblem with the schedules. Originally, I wasnt supposed to work today, and I havethis wedding that I really have to be at. Its my best friends, and Imofficiating so I really cant work past four.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Joey, you gotta stay until the end. We cant stop filmingjust for you. Its not like its your wedding. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Im having surgery!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 What?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, I-I just made up the stuff about the wedding because I didntwant you to worry about me. But, Im having surgery today.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 What kind of surgery?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Transplant.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 But youre supposed to work on Monday.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hair transplant.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 But youre not bald.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Its not on my head.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Look Joey, theres nothing I can do. Besides, youreprobably gonna be out by four anyway. Weve just got one short scene. Its justyou and Richard, and God knows hes a pro. Youll be fine.  Morning Richard.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey! Youre here! Great! Great! Great! Lets get going buddy,weve got a scene to shoot!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Im wearing two belts.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Are you drunk?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 No!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yes you are!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 All right.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 We are never gonna find him! Hes one guy in a huge city!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Is that him? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 That is an old, Chinese woman!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 He could be in disguise, yknow.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Aw, yknowYknow, maybe were-were justapproaching this all wrong. If youre Chandler and-and you wanna hide, where is thelast place on Earth people would think youd go?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 So this is your office?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 How did you guys find me? I knew I shouldve hid at the gym!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What the hell are you doing?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Panicking! And using the Internet to try to prove that Imrelated to Monica. How is she?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Shes fine. She doesnt know youre gone. And shedoesnt have to know, okay? Now come on, were going home.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No! No! No! I cant do that!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Why not?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Because if I go home, were gonna become the Bings! I cantbe the Bings!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Whats wrong with being the Bings?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 The Bings have horrible marriages! They yell. They fight. And they usethe pool boy as a pawn in their sexual games!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Chandler, have you ever put on a black cocktail dress and asked me up toyour hotel room?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Then you are neither of your parents!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Its not just their marriage! I mean, look at yours. Look ateverybodys! The only person that can make marriage work is Paul Newman! AndIve met me; I am not Paul Newman. I dont race cars! I dont make popcorn!None of my proceeds go to charity.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But look Chandler, right now, no one has a lower opinion of you than Ido. But I totally believe you can do this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I want to. I love her so much, but Im afrIts toohuge.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yknow, okay. Youre right. It is huge. So why dont wetake it just a little bit at a time? Okay? Umm, forget getting married for a sec; justforget about it. Can you just come home and take a shower?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well yeah, but then
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  YeahNo-but-but-but-but! Were just gonna gohome and take a shower. Now, thats not scary right?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Depends on what you mean by we.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 The nights are the hardest.  But then the day comes!And thats every bit as hard as the night. And then the night comes again
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  The days and nights are hard! I get it! Okay? Look umm,Rachel Im sorry! I have to start getting ready! Im getting married today!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I know. At dusk. Thats such a hard time for me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Im gonna go put my make up on, we have to be at thehotel in an hour! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. But wait!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Lets go to lunch.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I cant go to lunch!!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Right.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh good God! Ive fallen down! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Whats going on?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. All right.  Honey listen. When I tell you what Imabout to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we loveyou.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, youre-youre really freaking me out.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 We cant find Chandlers vest. We cant find Chandlers vest.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 How can that be?! Oh wait! Wait! Are you, are you serious?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Found the vest! I mean were gonna have to keep an eyeon it, yknow make sure we dont lose it again
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh wow! Okay. Dont scare me like that okay? I mean for a minutethere I was like, "Oh my God! The worst has happened!" 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 That can be arranged.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Lets reset.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 What?! He got me! Owwwwww!!!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Lets take it from there.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	  Are you a little off today? Its going terribly slowly.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Look, my best friends are getting married in like an hour. Okay? AndIm the minister. Please! Please! Can you pull it together?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Of course! Im-Im sorry. I-Id hate you to missanything like that on account of me. I can do this!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thank you. Thank you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Still rolling, annnnd action!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I would sooner die in this hellhole then see her back with you!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Now, that can be arranged!  Slippery little bugger!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 So-so you two were married huh? What happened? You just drift apart?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Here comes the bride.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God Monica!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I wanna wear this everyday.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You look so beautiful.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Im so happy for me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hello?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey! Did Chandler show up yet?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, we got him back. Everythings fine.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Damnit!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What? Why? Where are you?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Im still on the set!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Joey! The wedding is in less than an hour!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know! Im sorry! The guys drunk, they wont let me gountil we get this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh my God! Im gonna have to find another minister.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No! No, Im the minister! All right, look-look, put em both onthe phone, Ill marry them right now.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ugh! Joey, I have to go.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey! Dont you hang up on me! Ill marry you and me right now! Ihave the power!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 There you go. You put on a tuxedo! Now that wasnt so scary, was it?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Im telling you, just a little bit at a time.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah okay. Well, whats the next little bit?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Getting married.  Okay. Okay. You can, you can do thattoo! Just like youve done everything else!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah. Youre right. Hey I-I can do that.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay, excuse me for a minute. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 WhHeyWhoa-whoa, where, where you going?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ross, I am not gonna run away again! I just want to get a little freshair.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh fresh air!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Wait! Maybe, maybe youre overreacting! You do thatyknow.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well Phoebe, we gotta do something!  Well,yknow. I mean theres no way Joeys gonna make it in time. So Imgonna through the hotel and see if theres any other weddings going on.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Oh but dont tell them Monicas pregnant because, theyfrown on that.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Anastassakis/Papasifakis wedding, excellent!  Congratulations.  Mazel Tov!  Hi! Oh, great hat.  Listen umm, I need you to perform anotherwedding. Can you do that?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Rabbi	 I dont know. Are they Greek Orthodox?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah! Yeah. Theyretheyre-theyre my friends, uh,Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi!  Hi!  Hi. Has umm,anyone seen Chandler?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 I thought he was with you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 He-he was with me umm, were playing a little game, yknow? Hideand seek.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 You cant ask us son, thats cheating.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  Youre right, thanks for keeping me honest dad.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Well, he better not come by here. He cant see the bride inthe wedding dress.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 As I recall when we got married, I saw the groom in the weddingdress.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Bing	 But that was after the wedding, its not bad luck then.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Honey, it isnt good luck.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God! Monica!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know! Hey, hows Chandler doin?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Great. Hes doing great. Dont you worry about Chandler.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Are you okay?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh-huh.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, youre-youre sweating.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 These-these are beads of joy.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh thats sweet. Dont touch me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh Phoebe, can I see you for a second?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Whats going on?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Chandlers gone again!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Why would you play hide and seek with someone you know is aflight risk?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aaron! You gotta let me go. The guys hammered!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Director	 Im sorry Joey, as long as hes here and hesconscious were still shooting.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 You wouldnt happen to have a very big fork?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 So I uh, I just talked to the director. Thats it, were donefor the day.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Well have we finished the scene?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! Youyou were wonderful.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 As were you.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 So I got your car, its right outside.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Why? Are we done for the day?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Thats what you told me.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Oh, thank you. Youre welcome. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 No-no-no! We gotta go! Come on!  Here we go.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Richard	 Is that my ass? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	  There he is!!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hey! Oh!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Youre not getting away this time mister! Unless you want that asskicking we talked about!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ross! 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hiiii-Ya!!  Im serious! Youre notwalking out on my sister!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Thats right! Im not!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Then where the hell have you been?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I know about Monica.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You know?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, I heard you and Rachel talking.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?! What?! Talking about what?!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You dont know?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Know whatIf somebody doesnt tell me whats going on rightnow
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What? Youll hi-ya?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Monicas pregnant.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God. Oh my God! And youre-youreyoure notfreaking out?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well I was! Then I went down to the gift shop because I was out ofcigarettes
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe, Ross	 Cigarettes?!!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Big picture please! So I was in the gift shop, and thats when Iuh, saw this.  New York.)Yeah, yknow what? I thought anything that can fit into this, cant be scary.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well you obviously didnt see Chucky 3.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But come on, look at how cute and small this is! So I got it to giveMonica so shed know I was okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Dude. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 Way to go son! I knew youd find him!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Bing	 Our little boy is getting married.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Bing	 Oh look at you! So handsome!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You look beautiful mom.  You lookbeautiful too dad. I love you both.  Im so glad youhere. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Rabbi	 Are you Chandler?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Are you Joey?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Huh. This is nice.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ive never walked down the aisle knowing it cant end indivorce.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Oh I wish youre grandmother had lived to see this.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Shes right there.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Not that old crow, my mother.  Congratulations darling.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Mr. Geller	 I love you sweetheart. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You look beautiful. Is this new? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Not now.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  Who is this?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Rabbi	 I am Father Kalebasous.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Hes Greek Orthodox.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	  As are you
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	The Rabbi	 Let us begin. Dearly beloved
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	  Thats my line!  Ican take it from here, thanks.  Dearly beloved, Im sorry Im a littlelate. You may be confused by this now,  but you wont beMemorial Day weekend 2002. Well, lets get started before the groom takes off again.Huh?  We are gathered here today, to join this manand this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony. Ive known Monica and Chandler for along time, and I can not imagine two people more perfect for each other. And now,as Ive left my notes in my dressing room. We shall proceed to the vows. Monica?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	  He took off?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Go on! Go on. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 Chandler, for so long II wondered if I would ever find my prince,my soul mate. Then three years ago, at another wedding I turned to a friend for comfort.And in stead, I found everything that Id ever been looking for my whole life. Andnowhere we arewith our future before usand I only want to spend it withyou, my prince, my soul mate, my friend. Unless you dont want to. You go!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Chandler?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  No, thats okay.  Monica Ithought this was going to be the most difficult thing I ever gonna had to do. But when Isaw you walking down that aisle I realized how simple it was. I love you. Any surprisesthat come our way its okay, because I will always love you. You are the person I wasmeant to spend the rest of my life with. You wanna know if Im sure? 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 You may not kiss the bride. So, I guess by the powers vested in my by thestate of New York and the Internet guys, I now pronounce you husband and wife. Oh wait! Doyou take each other?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I do.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I do.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah you do!
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Ross	 Rings?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 Aw crap! Okayuhuh lets-lets do the rings. 
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Joey	 We good? Yeah? Good? Once again, I pronounce you husband and wife.  Now kiss her again.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I love you. And I know about the baby.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 What baby?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Our baby.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 We have a baby?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Phoebe found your pregnancy test in the trash.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Monica	 I didnt take a pregnancy test.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Thenwho did?
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh and theyre gonna have a baby.
07	23-24	0723-24	The One With Chandler And Monica's Wedding, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Photographer	 Great.  Great! Just give me a sec to changefilm.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	  Okay, I know Im not supposed to know, but I do. AndIm so excited for you!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 What? Whats going on?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Monicas pregnant!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Oh my God! Is that why you guys had to get married?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Guys! Im not pregnant.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Ah.  Slow swimmers? 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 What?! What do you mean? You-you-youre not pregnant?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 You didnt tell anybody I was did you?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 No!  Ill be right back. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Photographer	 Now why dont we get a shot of just Monica and the bloodysoldier.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	  Oh, about that. Joey, you have to change before the party.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 I cant! I-I dont have any other clothes here.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Find some! Please! Anything that doesnt say I-I died tragically inFrance. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Photographer	 Well then why dont we see the bride and the groom and thebridemaids.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Okay.  HeyMon, why did you tell the guys you werent pregnant?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Because Im not.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 We found your test in the trash, if youre not pregnantIts because I am.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 What?! What are you talking about?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 What are you talking about?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Yes, II am with child.  And I didnt want to sayanything because its your day; I didnt want to steal your thunder.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Wait a minute! So you told people I was pregnant?!  Does thislook like a conversation that I want to remember?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Whos the father?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Yeah!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 I cant say.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Why?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Why not?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 I cant say because hes famous.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh my God, who is it?! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Phoebe, come on, you have to tell us.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Okay, okay. Its James Brolin. James Brolin is the father of mybaby.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 As in Barbara Streisands husband James Brolin?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 What?! Well he never said that to me!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Photographer	 Why dont we have Monica step away and well getChandler and the bridemaids.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 How about just the bridemaids?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Yknow I am the groom right? I was told it was kinda big deal.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 It is.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 For you. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh, thank you for doing that. I just cant deal with this justquite yet.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 So instead you told me Monica was pregnant.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 You said that she was, I just didnt disagree with you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Sneaky.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Photographer	 Smile ladies.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh!  Oh by the way?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 James Brolin?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Oh, I know. I could only think of two names, him and Ed Begley Jr. andthen I remembered hes gay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Ed Begley Jr. is not gay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	  Really?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Bandleader	 Thank you very much! Ladies and gentlemen, it gives me greatpleasure to introduce to you for the very first time, Mr. and Mrs. Chandler Bing!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Before we go out there Ive got a present for ya.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Honey, Im going to put my hand in your pocket!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 No?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 No.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Ive been taking dancing lessons.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 What?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Yeah, the last six weeks. I wanted this to be a moment you will neverforget.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh that is so sweet!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 So? Would you care to join me in our first dance as husband and wife?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Yes.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Whats the matter?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 I dont know, its these new shoes, theyre allslippery.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Well, are you going to be able to do this?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Not well.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Well, the good news is, I dont think anyones looking at us.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 So, are you ready to talk about it?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 No.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Now?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 No!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Okay, well talk about something else then.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Whos the father?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Ugh! Look honey yknow what? I havent told him yet, so untilI do I dont think I should tell anybody else.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Yeah. Thats fine. Thats fair. Is it Tag?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Phoebe!!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Okay, Im sorry. Ill stop.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Is it Ross? Its Ross isnt itOh my God, its Joey!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Honey, stop it! I am not going to tell you until I tell him.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Ah-hah! At least we know its a him.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	  Oh sweet Lord.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Im sorry! Okay? I went down to the gift shop and its eitherthis or a bathrobe! Look, whats more important, the way Im dressed or me beingwith you on your special day?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Honey, Im not even going to pretend I was listening.  Hey! Hey! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Hi. Im uh, Im Ross. I dont, I dont believeweve met. Im Monicas older brother.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Woman	 Oh hi, Im, Im Mona from her restaurant.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh! Hello uh, Mona from her restaurant.   Mona, wow what a, what a beautiful name.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 You think so? Ive always kinda hated it.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Aw come on, Mona Lisa?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Uh-huh.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Mona ummClickclocken. The famous botanist? Huh? Oh no shesuhwell shes dead now. No, supposedly she was once quite the hottie of theplant world.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Really?! Well see? I never knew about her.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Linda Clickclocken.  So what uh, what-what table are you at?  Oh, uh me too.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Oh good. Now therell be someone there who likes my name.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	  Yes there will.  Oh guess what, Molly Gilbert youve just been bumped up to table one. And ifits all right with you Im gonna take your place at table sixMartinClickclocken.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Thats better, now just bend your arms a little more. There you go.Okay, look straight ahead. Now this time I want you to really put your ass into it. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mrs. Bing	 Chandler darling! Look, my date has finally arrived. Id likeyou to meet Dennis Phillips.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Congratulations.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mrs. Bing	 Dennis is a dear old friend and a fantastic lover.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Bravo Dennis thanks for pleasing my mother so.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Oh, Im so sorry I missed the ceremony, I was stuck atauditions.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mrs. Bing	 Oh yes, Dennis is directing a new Broadway show.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 I dont believe weve met, Joey Tribbiani.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Dennis Phillips
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Wow, Ive admired your work for years. You-youve done somereally amazing stuff.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Oh, thank you. Well if youll excuse me, Im gonna goget myself a drink. Be back in a moment. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Wow Dennis Phillips! Thats great! How did you guys meet?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mrs. Bing	 Well, its a funny story.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Funny: ha-ha or funny: 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Bandleader	 Thank you, thank you very much. If everyone will please take yourseats, dinner will be served.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Hey! Uh, I thought, I thought you were at table six.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 No, nine. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh see, before you uh, when you showed it to me you-you held it that way which uh, which was misleading. Well Im  Hello.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Chandler. Will you see if your mom can give my resume to Dennis Phillips?Cause if I can get in a Broadway show then I wouldve done it all, film,television, and theater. The only think left would be radio, and thats just for uglypeople.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 What size shoes do you wear?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Uh, eleven, eleven and a half.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Great, because my shoes are giving me a little problem on the dancefloor, can I borrow the boots from your costume?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Uh, I dont even really know where I left those. Sorry.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	  Those arent eleven and a half.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Okay fine! Im a seven! All right, I have surprisingly small feet.But the rest of me is good, Ill show ya!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Can you believe Phoebe got pregnant?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh yknow what honey? Lets not talk about that right now?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 This is so huge.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Sure, but come on, as big as your wedding?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Of course not nothing is. Between me and you
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 in this day and age how dumb do you have to be to get pregnant?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Hey! Yknow, sometimes you can do everything right, everyone canwear everything theyre supposed to wear, and one of those little guys just getsthrough!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 How?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 I dont know! Maybe they have tools.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Well I-I talked to and uh, shes definitely going to have thisbaby. Yknow, she said she was gonna raise it on her own.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Well, maybe thats, maybe thats really brave.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Maybe. I just hope she realizes how hard its gonna be.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Maybe she hasnt really thought it through that well.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Well, theres a lot to think about. I mean, how is she, how is shegoing to handle this financially? How is she going to juggle work? Does she realizeshes not going to have a date again for the next eighteen years?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	  I dont know.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Are you okay?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Uh-hmm. Im just thinking about Phoebe; poor knocked up Phoebe.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Waiter	 Champagne?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh yes! Thank you very much!  Oh thats-thats actually howthe French drink it.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Well, I just got off the phone with my lover, James Brolin
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh really?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Yes, and apparently he is married to some singer, but he said he wouldleave her for me. And I said, "James, James Brolin, are you sure?" James Brolinsaid
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	  Rachels really the one whos pregnant.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	  What?!  Why bother?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 How do you feel?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 I dont know. I dont know how I feel. This is all happeningso fast. I have to make all these decisions that I dont want to make.  Somebody just take this away from me!!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Calm down. Maybe youre not pregnant.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 What?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 When I got pregnant with the triplets, I took that test like three timesjust to make sure.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Yes! Maybe its a false positive. Are you sure you peed on thestick right?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 How many ways are there to do that?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Im-Im just saying, dont freak out until youre ahundred percent sure.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 All right, Ill-Ill take it again when I get home.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 You-you gotta take it now. Come on, do it as a present to me.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Okay. Thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Ill run out and get you one.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh, you guys are so great.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh, wait a minute! Whos is the father?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Oh no, she wont tell us.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh, come on its my wedding! That can be my present.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 WhHey, I just gave you peeing on a stick.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 See? This is why you register.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 It was the chair again! Okay? Im not doing it! It whatlook, Idontyknow whateh-eh Hi.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Hi!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Umm, would you like to dance?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Sure.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Yeah?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Yeah.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh great! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Dr. Geller?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 I wasnt farting!  Uh, a little game from our table.  Yes?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Dr. Geller, will you dance with me?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh umm, well uh, maybe-maybe later. Right now, Im about to dancewith this lady. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Okay. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Ohhhh!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Uh, unless! Unless, uh this lady wouldnt mind letting you go first.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Id be happy to.  You are very sweet.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Yes I-I am. In fact umm hey, why dont we try it my special way? Youcan dance on my feet.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Sure!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Yeah? Hop on.  Is the pretty ladylooking?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Uh-huh.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Keep dancing.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 And the world will never know.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Hey! Did you talk to Dennis about me yet?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Yes, I told him how talented you were. I told him all about Days OfOur Lives.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 No-no! No! No! You dont tell a Broadway guy that! Now he just thinksIm a soap actor.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 But youre not just a soap actor. You are a soap actorwith freakishly tiny feet.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Hey!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 No-no, thank you Miranda.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Little Girl	 Melinda!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 All right. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 How cute was that?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh-oh, were you, were you watching?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Second Girl	 Can I go next?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 What? Of course you can! Hop on!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Okay, but I get to hop on after her. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 I am so gonna score.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Second Girl	 What?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 I like your bow.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	  Id like to propose a toast. To Monica andChandler, the greatest couple in the world. And my best friends. Now, my when I firstfound out they were getting married I was, I was a little angry. I was like,  "Why God? Why? How can you take them away from me?!" But then I thoughtback over all our memories together, some happy memories.  And-andthere was some sad memories.  Im sorry. And-and somescared memoriesWhoa!  Eh? And then, and then I realizedIll always be their friend, their friend who can speak in many dialects and hastraining in stage combat and is willing to do partial nudity.  Oh! To the happy couple!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Bandleader	 Thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	  That was very nice Ashley.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ashley	 Can we do it again?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 No-no.  
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 So, is it my turn now?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Fat Girl	 Im next!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Uh, thats okay. You can dance with her first.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh, you-you sure?  Okay.  Okay. So whatsuh, whats your name.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Fat Girl	 Gert!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Thats, thats pretty.  Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!What are you doing there Gert?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Gert	 Dancing on your feet! Like the other girls did it.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Okay.  Hop on Gert. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Gert	 Why arent you moving your feet?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Im trying. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Gert	 Faster! Youre not going fast enough!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Maybe I should stand on your feet! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 So did you uh, happen to catch my toast up there?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Oh my God, that was for my benefit?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Well, Id like to think there was something for everyone. Look, Iknow youre casting for this new show
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Look umm Joey, I-I dont think youre quite right forthis project.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Oh, see thats where youre wrong. Whatever it is I can do it.And if didnt see it up there, just-just try me.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Its an all Chinese cast. Can you be Chinese?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Well Im not proud of this, but 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Dennis Phillips	 Oh my God! No-no-no! Please! Please!Dont-dont-dont!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Hey, are you ready to get back on the dance floor?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Did it turn into sand?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Ohh come on, I love this song! Come on, youll be fine. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	  No. No, I wont. Do you know why I tookall those lessons? See, for the first time I didnt want you to be embarrassed to beseen on the dance floor with some clumsy idiot.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh sweetie, you can never embarrass me.  Okay, you caneasily embarrass me. But come on, it doesnt matter. All right? I married you! So Iwant to dance on my wedding night with my husband. Come on.  Justtry not to move your feet at all.  There you go.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mr. Geller	 Chandler, Im gonna have you arrested.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Chandler	 Why?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mr. Geller	 You stole my moves. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 How much longer?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 30 seconds.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 30 seconds, okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	  Did I miss it?  Rachel, I-I want you to knowthat, if its positive, were gonna
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh I know. I know. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Its time.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	The Girls	 No!! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Go ahead Rach.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh wait! Yknow what? I cant, I cant look at it. Icant. Somebody else tell me, somebody tell me.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Umm, its negative.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 What?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Its negative.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh. Oh. Well there you go. Whew!  That isthatsgreatthat is really great-great news.  Yknow cause the whole notbeing ready and kinda the financial aspects, all that. Whew. Wow, this is so just the wayit was supposed to be.  God.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Well Well, great.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Here. 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Thanks.  God this is so stupid!  How could I be upsetover something I never had? Its negative?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 No, its positive.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 What?!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Its-its not negative, its positive.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Are you sure?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Well yeah, I lied before.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Oh God
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 Now you know how you really feel about it.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Oh-oh, thats a risky little game!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Monica	 Are you really gonna do this?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Yeah. Im gonna have a baby. Im gonna have a baby. Imgonna have a baby! 
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Phoebe	 With who?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Rachel	 Ah, its still not the time.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 I just didnt see the fast song coming.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Shh. Shh. Dont try to talk, well get you up to your room,well soak your feet, youll be okay.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Oh, thank you.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 That is so sweet!
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Yeah.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 No, I mean it. There are so few genuinely nice guys out there.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Tell me about it, I feel like Im holding down the fort all bymyself.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Mona	 Its Joey right?
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Joey	 Yeah.
08	01	0801	The One After "I Do"	Ross	 Wait a minute! No! Im the nice one! Im the one who danced withthe kids all night! HowHow small are your feet?! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Listen yknow what sir? For the last time, I dont care whatthe computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did notwatch Dr. Do-Me-A-Little!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Hey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh! Joey uh, were you in our room last night?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 No.  I wastold the name of the movie would not appear on the bill!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	  Hi! Were checking out of the bridalsuite.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	  Thats right. Im no longer a bride. Illnever be a bride again. Now, Im just someones wife!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 And Im the happiest guy in the world!  Oh honey, come on dont be upset. We still have so much to look forwardto!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Oh yeah, right. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 We got the honeymoon.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Thats not til Thursday.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 The wedding pictures?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 They wont be ready for weeks.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Not the disposable cameras from the tables.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Thats true!  I knew I married you for a reason!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Ill tell you what, I will go get them developed and you can gohome.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Okay.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 What? What did you take a picture of?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Nothing! It was something.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Okay Ross has the cameras, has he checked out yet?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Are you joking? Check out is not til noon and he has a good eleven minutes left.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Oh.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Ross has never checked out of a room a minute before he had to.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he gotso excited it was the best sex we ever had. Until yknow, he screamed out Radissonat the end.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Okay, well Im gonna get Ross, get the cameras, and get themdeveloped.  32 Joe. Youre 32! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Front Desk Clerk	  Heres a copy of your bill.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Oh thanks.  Champagne, strawberriesOh my God! Icant believe Chandler ordered porn on our wedding night!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Yeah, thats sad. Mashuga nut?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Hi.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Hey.  Soaps?Shampoos? Are you really taking all this stuff?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Why not? Its built into the price of the room.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Yeah but you dont needWhat isthis?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Thread!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Score! Where are the disposable cameras?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 What disposable cameras?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 The cameras? Remember last night I told you to take them?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 No you didnt.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Yes! Remember? Right before we cut the cake, I went up to you and Isaid
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Oh-oh yeah, you-you came up to me and asked if I could do you a favor, andmy Uncle Murray came up to you and handed you a check. And then you said, "Why dothey call it a check? Why not a Yugoslavian?"  Yeah, then you didthat.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 So you dont have the cameras?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 No. Sorry man.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 So? What? What? Theyre gone! Monicas gonna freak!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Well, Im sure theyre still somewhere here in the hotel.Ill-Ill help you look for them.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Great.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 In-in three minutes.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Hey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Are you gonna open the presents without Chandler?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 No!  But, theyre callin out to me! I mean this littleguy  even crawled up into my lap. Oh come on, Chandler wouldntmind if I opened just one present! What do you think it is?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 A little mirror that when you look into it you see yourself as an oldwoman.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 A tiny salt shaker!!!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Ohhh! My God! For tiny salt!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Oh wow! Okay. Well that was fun.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh yeah.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Good. Okay, Im just gonna wait for Chandler to open the rest ofthem.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Whew. Although yknow, this is part of a salt and pepper set. Imean I guess yknow it may just count as a half a present. What do you think?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Well I guess its okay to open one more if its part of a set.Yknow, its probably this one. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Or this one! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	  Hi.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Hey, how are you feelin? Any morning sickness?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Shh-shh-shh! The guys dont know yet do they?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 No! Joey and Ross dont know anything and Chandler still thinksthat Phoebes pregnant.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Yeah thats right Chandler does still think Im pregnant. Hehasnt asked me how Im feeling or offered to carry my bags. Boy, I feel bad forthe woman who ends up with him.  After you of course.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Dont worry I promise that you will only have to be pregnant for afew more hours, cause Im going to tell the father today.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Ooh, is it someone in this building? Is it that tall guy from the firstfloor?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Ew! No!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 What?! I think hes cute.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Well then you have his baby.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Believe me Im trying.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Wow. Yknow it is so weird. I mean, youre gonna tell this guytoday and he has no idea whats gonna happen.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Yeah. Youre just gonna knock on his door and change his lifeforever. Youre like Ed McMahon except without the big check, or the raw sexualmagnetism.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Yeah. Uh-huh, I guess it is pretty big news.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Pretty big? Its huge! God, this guy doesnt have a clue!Hes just walking down the street thinking, I had sex with Rachel Green. Irock! then bam! Hes a father and everythings different.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Well its only different if he wants it to be. I mean, Im notgonna ask him for anything.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Okay. Then he still has this huge decision to make. Now heswalking around thinking, Do I want to be a dad? and then bam!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 What was that bam?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 I dont. He gothe-he-he-hes hit by a bus.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Hey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Hey Joey, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you thatshe was pregnant?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Who called here? Did she sound blond? Huh? Did-did-did she havean accent? I gotta make a call!  I shoulda never walked into thatSunglass Hut!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Oh Joey! Joey! No, its not you! You didnt get anybodypregnant!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Oh. Why would you scare me like that? What the hell is going on? Is somebody pregnant?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh yeah. Thats me.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Oh my God Pheebs! Youre gonna have a baby?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Yes. Yes I am. Oh my God, Im gonna have a baby! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Whoa, wait a minute. Whos the father?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 You dont know him. Its not important. He wants nothing to dowith me or the baby. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Well who is this guy?! Huh? Who is he? Cause I will track him downand kick his ass!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 David Lynn.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 David Lynn! David Lynn! David Lynn!! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Whos David Lynn?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh some guy from my gym. A little annoying.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Chandler?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Hey! Did you find the cameras?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 No. Did you?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Yes! And thats why Im under the table. Celebrating.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Well I checked in the uh, lost and found, I talked to the manager,no-ones turned them.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Well this is great. Yknow, those cameras were the only thingthat was gonna cheer Monica up today, shes really depressed.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Now you guys just got married, why is she so depressed?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 All my energy is going into not asking that question. I cantbelieve I screwed this up!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Im sorry man.  Heresa thought. This is the same ballroom. Theres a band. Theres gonna be plenty ofdressed up people.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Are you suggesting we dance our troubles away?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 No-no-no, Im saying we-we buy more of this  atthe gift shop, throw our tuxes back on, and take a few pictures. All we have to do is makesure not to get anybody elses faces.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Are you serious?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Im just thinking about your new bride at home. Okay? Do-do youreally want to start your life together by letting her down?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Marriage advice? Really?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Im telling you, this looks exactly like your wedding! Arentthese the same flowers?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 I dont know, Monica picked out the flowers.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 What about the chairs?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 She picked those out too.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 How about the place settings?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 That was her.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 What did you do?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 I was in charge of the cameras! Gift shop?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Hmm. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Hey! Ooh, did you do it yet?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Not yet.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh, well what are you doing here? Are you about to do it?  Is itGunther?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 No! Phoebe, its not Gunther.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Thank God, cause that hair on a baby
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Phoebe the father is not here okay? I havent told him yet and Idont think I can tell him at all now!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Why not?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 I dont know, let me think. I was walking down the street thinking,Im gonna tell the father today and then bam!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Bus?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 No, you! Phoebe you freaked me out. You kept saying how huge this allis!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Well-well but it is huge.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 I know, but I was just thinking about how huge this is for me. Ididnt even go to how huge this was going to be for the father.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Youre thinking about this way too much. Just tell him and get itover with. Its like, its like ripping off this Band-Aid.  Quickand painless, watch.  Oh mother ofSee?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Ooh-ooh-ooh! Are we opening presents?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 No! No! I shouldnt have even opened these! I mean IJoey I amout of control!! Joey, you have to do me a favor. No matter what I say, no matter what Ido, please do not let me open another present! Okay?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Okay.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Give me one more.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Okay. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	  Hey.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Oh good, uh youre here. Uh Pheebs? Listen uh sit down. I-I gotsomething I want to say. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 All right. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Umm, now uh Its a scary world out there, especially for asingle mom. Yknow, now I always thought you and I had a special bond so  Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Oh my God! Joey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Hell yeah! Ill marry you! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 You cant marry him!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Hey lady, your days over! Its my turn!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Phoebe!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Why?! Why cant she marry me?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 I can and I will! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Shes not pregnant. Its Rachel. Rachels the onewhos pregnant.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Oh my God.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Phoebe I think he would notice if you didnt have a baby in ninemonths!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Its Joey! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Now I cant believe it! What? Rachelspregnant?  Whos the father?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 We dont know.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Ohh I wonder if that dude.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Theres a dude?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Yeah.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Who? Who is it?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 About a month ago this guy spent the night with Rachel, I didnt seewho it was but 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Was that story over? 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 The guy left this.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	  Oh my God! I know who the father is 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 People have got to finish their stories!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	  Uh, excuse me? Could you take a picture of us?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Woman At The Wedding	 Oh! Of course. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Man At The Wedding	 Uh, would you take one of us?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Uhh Yeah sure.  Click!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Woman At The Wedding	 It didnt click.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 I heard it. I heard it.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Man At The Wedding	 But there was no flash.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Woman At The Wedding	 Why wont you take our picture?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Oh yeah. Ill take, Ill take your picture. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Man At The Wedding	 Uh, your finger was covering the lens.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Who are you? Ansel Adams?! Get outta here!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Look, I feel really bad about how I freaked you out before, so I calledthe father and asked him to meet you here so you can tell him. Go!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 What? Hey wait a minute! Phoebe, how do you even know who the father is?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 I may play the fool at times, but Im a little more than a prettyblond girl with an ass that wont quit.  Ibelieve this belongs to the father of your baby.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Oh God Oh, hes in there right now?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. Now you can turn around or you can go in there and rip theBand-Aid off. What to you want to do?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Uh, lets rip!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Really? Are you sure?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Oh Phoebe!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Okay, sorry. Yeah. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Hey Rach.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Why dont you go up on stage. Ill get a picture of youdoing the speech.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Okay. Okay! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Will the owner of a 1995 Buick LeSabre please see the front desk? Your caris about to be towed.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Anxious Wedding Guest	  Thats my car!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 A 95 LeSabre?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Anxious Wedding Guest	 Yes!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 A green LeSabre?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Anxious Wedding Guest	 Yes!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Im sorry, I meant a blue LeSabre.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Anxious Wedding Guest	 Yes! Green-blue!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Well go! Go move it! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Okay, you ready for the last picture?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Yeah.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Get ready to run. Congratulations on your wedding. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 So, whats this about?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Rachel has something that she wants to tell you and umm, I believe thatthis is your red sweater.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 No.  This is my red sweater.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Oh no. Could I get anyone a coffee orpoison? No? Just for me?Okay. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Whats going on Rach?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Nothing! Phoebe kinda made a mistake. But yknow you do wear thatsweater a lot, are you involved in some kind of dare?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Yknow, Im actually glad Phoebe called.  I know we broke up because you thought I wasnt mature enough,but Ive really grown up and think we should get back together.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Oh, its just not the right time.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 It is the right time. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Okay.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Im ready for more.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Tag
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Come on Rach, lets give it another try.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Im having a baby.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Oh. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 You can go.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Thank you. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	  I dont know how any of these gotopened?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  You opened them all?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 I know! I know! I am a terrible person! I mean, Chandler is never goingto trust me with anything ever again!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Oh hey! You got my parents gift! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Yeah. What is that?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Well, I dont know. I think it does something to salami.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Hey! Howd it go?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Yeah. What-what did Tag say?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Tag is not the father! And Joey knows now?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 I do Rach. I do, and I so happy for you. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Oh wow, you didnt even try to unhook my bra!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 So are you ever gonna tell whoever it is?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 No, I will. Im just not up for it tonight.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Hey Rach listen, no matter what this guy says I want you to knowyoure not gonna be alone in this.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Im not?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Listen I uh  Its a scary world out thereespecially if youre a single mom. Yknow, I always felt like you and I havethis-this special bond. Yknow? So,  Rachel Green willyou marry me?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 What?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 What?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 What?!!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Pheebs, give me the ring back!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 No!!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 No! Joey, oh youre so sweet. Youre so-so sweet, honey. ButIm not, Im not looking for a husband.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  I understand.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Rachel	 Now, if you will excuse me I am going to go and lie down. 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 I cant say that didnt hurt. But Ill take you back JoeyTribbiani.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 Uh yeah. Pheebs, listen about that. I only offered
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Ooh! A Salami Buddy!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	 There you go!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Were back!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Great! Were hangin in the kitchen!  Lets stay in the kitchen!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Its picture time.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Now you are going to love these.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	  Heres a picture of Ross.  And thats me.  And thats me and Ross. Oh-ho, that is a picture of our first kiss as a married couple.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Wow! That is a great picture!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Eh?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Yeah! Oh and interesting because I found the cameras in one of our bags!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Huh, didnt see that coming.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Okay, so this isnt a picture of our first, but it is a pictureof my first kiss withwith this lady. Which by the look on your face Im sureyoull remember. So we dont needTheres noneed to have this picture. How about I take the real pictures and get them developed rightnow.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 That would be a good idea.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Okay.  You opened all the presents without me?!I thought we were supposed to do that together!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 You kissed another woman!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Chandler	 Call it even?!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica	 Okay! 
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Well, Im gonna go get these in some water.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Phoebe	 Wait you stole those from these peoples wedding?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 No-no, I took them from the hotel lobby. Yeah, they think they can chargeme for some dirty movie and a bag of Mashuga nuts, they got another think coming.  Hey! My sweater! Ive been looking for this for like a month!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Monica, Phoebe	 Oh my God!!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Joey	  Oh my God!
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Hey! How you doing?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Good! Good, long time no see.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Yeah.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Like your sweater.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Oh hey, right back at ya.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Oh, its crazy about Rachel huh?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 Yeah. SheWell, shes one crazy lady?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 So whose is it?
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	  Umm, I dont some Italian guy. Come on,read your own label. See you later.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Tag	 Okay.
08	02	0802	The One With The Red Sweater	Ross	 He is so weird.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Hey! Babe! Arent you excited were going on our honeymoon?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Yeah I am!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	  Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Thats right. Get it out of your system while were alone.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	  Hey!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Yeah! Have a great honeymoon!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Id better go pack.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Oh no, I already packed. The only thing I couldnt find though wasyour Speedo.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 A Speedo? Uh, I dont have a Speedo. Im gonna go pack myregular long bathing suit. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Oh good youre still here!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Hey!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I want to tell you to have a good honeymoon! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Thank you.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 And I also wanted you guys to know that I am telling the father today. What? What? What?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 We know its Ross!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 How?! How do you know?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 It was his sweater, butOh my God!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh, I so wanted Ross to know first, but Im so relieved you guysknow.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 This is so great! And Im gonna be your babys aunt!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I know! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Me too! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Im gonna be an uncle! Come here! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Youre all gonna be aunts and uncles.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Yeah, but Im the only one related by blood.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay. Great! So now that you guys all know you can help me. Give me someadvice on how Im gonna tell Ross!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Well, what were you gonna say?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Well I was gonna tell him that Im-Im gonna have the baby andhe can be as involved as he wants.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Well that, that sounds good.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Yeah but how do I start? I mean, whats-whats the first thingthat I say?  Okay great! Thanks. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Hey! Good luck!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Yeah, bye.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Bye.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	  Hey, what was that all about?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Well I guess there is no harm in telling you now, Rachel and Ross aregonna have a baby.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	  What?! I didnt even know thatWhydidnt you tell me?!  Why am I talking like this?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 I didnt think you could keep it a secret.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	  What?!  I am an excellentsecret keeper. I have kept all of our secrets.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 What secrets?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Oh no-no Joey, I am not going to tell you because I am an excellentsecret keeper.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	  Youll tell me later?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 You already know.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh, it's so romantic to send people off on their honeymoon.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yknow, Monica and Chandler are married. Ross and Rachel are having ababy. Maybe you and I should do something.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 All in good time my love. All in good time. Oh shoot! I left my guitarin their apartment. Well you can let me in later.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 I dont have a key, they took mine to give to you.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 What?! They took mine to give to you!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Why would they take away our keys?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Maybe they dont trust us.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 No thats not it. They let me keep my key the last time they were outof town. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 You mean the time you broke the ketchup bottle and cleaned it up withMonicas guest towels?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Hey, I washed those!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 No you didnt.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yeah that didnt sound like me.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Well, what am I gonna do? I really need my guitar!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yeah, I have stuff in there too.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 What stuff?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Monicas chicken parm! Ill take care of it.  Hey Mr. Treeger, its Joey Tribbiani. Listen, I need to get into Monica andChandlers apartment. Its an emergency.  Uhh, gas leak! Yeah oh, andbring garlic bread. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	  Hey!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Did Rachel find you?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 No why?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh she was looking for you.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh well, I guess Ill catch up with her later.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Well, she really wanted to talk to you now.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yeah, it seemed pretty important.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh no.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 What?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 I think I might know what this is about.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Really?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah. Uh, uh we promised we werent gonna tell anybody this but uh,about a month ago Rachel and I slept together.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	  And?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Wow! I thought you would be a little more shocked.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh sorry.  And?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Well, we-we said wed just do it that one time but, but now I thinkshe may wanna start things up again.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yeah, I dont think thats what it is.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Why? What-what else could it be?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Oh wow, I dont feel well.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Im telling you. Im telling you. Thats what it is. Nowonder she was looking at me all funny during the wedding. She didnt say anything toyou?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	  Maybe its something you ate?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Please, just-just, just go and talk to Rachel.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah, I guess I should.  Man, yknow what I have torealize? Maybe Im just not the type of guy women can have just one night with.Yknow, they-they always seem to want a little bit more. I should remember that. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Next?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Theyre kissing lets just go around them.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Oh honey, leave them alone, theyre in love.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Im in love too! But in an orderly fashion.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Next?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	  Hi! Can you do that and walk? Cause shesaid, "Next."
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Woman	 Sorry. We didnt hear you; were on our honeymoon.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Oh, let me see what I can do.  There are somefirst class seats available.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	  Did you hear that?! They bumped them up to first classbecause they are on their honeymoon! Come on! Lets act like were on ourhoneymoon.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 We are on our honeymoon.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Grab my ass!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Next?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Hi, sorry. I almost didnt hear you, because yknow Imjust so in love with my new husband. Were on our honeymoon.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Congratulations. Okay, Mr. Bing youll be in 25J and Mrs.Bing youll be in 25K.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Oh no, you see were on our honeymoon. So umm, can you do yourlittle thing and bump us up to first class?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ticket Agent	 Im sorry, all our first class seats are taken. That couplegot the last two.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 You see, if wed gone around them like I said, weShewouldve given us those tickets. Damnit!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 25J and K, any chance those arent together?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 I still cant believe they took away my key. You trust me with yours.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Of course I do! And Im gonna give it back to you as soon astheyre done with it at the key shining place.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 What the hell is that?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Treeger, what are you doing?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 You said there was a gas leak in here.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Well why dont you use your key?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Because by the time I find it on this thing , the whole place might have exploded. If that happens atanother building that I manage, people are gonna start asking questions. Come on! Hurry up.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh! We could have done that.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Look at that! Look at that! Theyre going into the first classlounge! Do you know what they have in there?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 No.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Me neither! We have to get in! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Just act like you belong.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Oh my God! Oranges!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Shh!  Nice to see you again. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Airline Employee	 Uh sir, may I see your tickets please?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Yes, of course. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Airline Employee	 Im sorry, would you move your thumb? I cant seethe seat number.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Oh thats all right, I have it memorized. Its 1A.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Airline Employee	  Sir, this is not a first classticket. Im sorry.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Apology accepted. Excuse us. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Airline Employee	 Sir! Im afraid Im gonna have to ask you to leave.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Fine.  Go! Go! Go!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Hi!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Hi.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Hi.  Umm, I think theres something that wereally need to talk about.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	  I think we do. Why dont we go inside?  Look uh, I know why youre here.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 You do?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah, and to save you from any embarrassment umm, I think maybe I shouldtalk first.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Okay.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Okay.  Uh, Ross and Rachel. Rachel and Ross.Thats been one heck of a see-saw hasnt it?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  What?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 I mean look, that-that one night we had was fun andand certainlypassionate, but dont you think its better if we just stayed friends?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Seriously. What?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Okay. Okay. Yknow what? If you want to, we can do it one more time.I mean Id-Id be okay with that. In fact, I have some time right now.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay, yknow what? Can I, can I talk now?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh sure. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Im pregnant.  Ross?  Ross?  Okay, whenever youre ready. And youre the father by the waybut you gotthat
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Can I get you some water?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Im good. Im good.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Ross, there is no pressure on you. Okay? I mean you can as involved asyou want. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah, I need uh Im justI dont knowIdont understand, umm, how this happened? We-we used a condom.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I know. I know, but yknow condoms only work like 97% of the time.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 What? What? What?!! Well they should put that on the box!!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 They do!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 No they dont!!!  Well they should put it in huge black letters!!!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay Ross come on lets just forget about the condoms.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh well I may as well have!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Listen, yknow what? I was really freaked out too when I foundout
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Freaked out? Hey no, Im not freaked out! Im indignant!As a consumer!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Yknow what? Lets, lets talk later.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 No! No! I want to talk now! Okay? IIn fact,  Iam going to talk to the president of the condom company!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay, yknow maybe I should come back 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	  Shh! Shh! Shh!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Okay.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	  Yeah Ill press 1! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Ive looked everywhere. Theres no gas leak.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	  Huh. So then I can heat this up? 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Anyway uh, Ill get moving on that new door.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh great! And listen, could you do us a favor and not tell Chandler andMonica about this? Cause yknow umm, they dont-they dont have anykids of their own and-and this door was like a child to them.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Well Im gonna have to put on a new lock, theyll findout anyway.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh no.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	  Whoa! This looks like an allday job, Ill have to cancel my yoga class.  Hey Ross!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Hi.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Could you tell Jasmine that I won't make it to yoga class today?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Sure.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Mr. Treeger	 Namaste. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Namaste. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh my God! What happened to the door?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 So its noticeable huh?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Look, is Rachel here? I really need to talk to her.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Didnt you two already talk?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah but uh Okay, okay look you guys know that Rachel and I slepttogether, but theres something else.  Rachels pregnant.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	  Oh my God!!! I cant believe that!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	  Holy mother of God!!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 With my child.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 That is brand new information!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 You already know dont you?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 A little bit.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 How are you doing?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Okay. Okay. I mean Ill be okay. Its just I dont think Ihandled it very well.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Well, what did you say to her?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Nothing. But the complaint department at the condom company got an earful.And then when I turned around she was gone.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh Ross.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 But hey, in my defense I-I just found out condoms are like only 97%effective.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	  What?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 I gotta go find her.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Whoa! Hey! Whoa!! Hold up! Are you serious?! So like 3% of the time theydont even work?! Huh? They should put that on the box!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Evidently they do.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 What?! 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 I cant believe were here.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Oh youve got to be kidding me.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 What? 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Front Desk Clerk	 As a wedding gift to you, the hotel would like to give you thehoneymoon suite.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 No!! You have been screwing us all day!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Man	 Who are you?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 Were you just ten seconds later!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Yeah! You already got the first class tickets; you got the lounge! Imean we should get free stuff too! I mean youre not the only ones on your honeymoon!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Woman	 Well you can have the suite if you want. We dont care about wherewe stay. Were here to celebrate our love together. We dont have to get freestuff. We just want to be together.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	  We need the stuff.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Hey Monica its Joey. Listen uh, Phoebe and I smell gas cominfrom your apartment.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 What? Are you serious?!  Joey smells gas!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Chandler	 What else is new?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Yeah and wed go check it out, but you took away our keys.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Well do something! Get in there!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 How? I guess I could break down your door.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 Yeah! Do that!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 And-and you wont blame us for any damage? 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Monica	 No!  Are you doing it?! I dont hear anything! Come on!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Uh, okay Ill-Ill-Ill break it down. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh hey hi, hes doing it. Hes breaking down the door.  Okay, were in. 
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Nurse	 Okay Rachel, are you comfortable?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  If I said I was, would you judge me?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Nurse	 The doctor will be here in a minute to do your sonogram.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay.  Oh man, I swear if they sold these at PotteryBarn
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Hi!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	  Hi!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Uh we-we need to talk.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Uh-uh-uh, right now? Because Ive kinda got an el fresco situationgoing on over here.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Please, please I want to apologize for the way I acted earlier today.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay Ross thats fine, but can you please stand near my head?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 What? Oh yeah.  Im sorry. I mean I-Ithink I went a little crazy. I mean I was thinking about myself when I  reallyI should have been thinking about you Rach
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay. Head Ross! Head Ross! Head Ross!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Right! Right! I justI want you to know that Im going to bethere through this whole thing, okay? Okay? The doctors appointments, the uh, theLamaze classes, uh baby-proofing the apartmentAlthough we could probably worry aboutthat til after we get married.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 What married?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Well yeah, I think we should get married.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 What, because thats your answer to everything?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 No, because thats the right thing to do.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe if youre in love. But Ross, we are not in love, arewe?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 No butbut still you cant possibly do this alone.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Excuse me?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Come on Rach, you cant even eat alone in a restaurant.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 What?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Im just saying if you cant eat by yourself, how do you expectto have a baby by yourself?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I can too eat by myself!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 When have you ever?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 When certain people leave the table and I am not finished!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Well certain other people take two hours to eat a bowl of soup!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh please, you inhale your food!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 I grew up with Monica! If you didnt eat fast you didnt eat!!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Dr. Long	  Am I interrupting?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh no Dr. Long, please come in. This is Ross, he is the father.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 But not the husband, because evidently she can do this alone.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Dr. Long	 Huh. Nice to meet you. Ill get started on this.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	  I dont know why you cantadmit that you need me.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I do need you! I need you to stand near my head!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Dr. Long	 Okay, everything looks good. Here it is on the screen.  Here is your uterus. And right here is your baby.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh my God.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Wow. There it is, I see it.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Dr. Long	 Congratulations. Ill give you two a minute.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Okay.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Thank you.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Pretty amazing huh?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I dont see it!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 What? What?!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I cant see it!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 You-you just said that you did!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 I know, I lied! I didnt want her to think I was a terrible mother!I cant even see my own baby!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh sure, come here!  Sure you can! Uh, look come here look, its-its-its, its right there .
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh. Oh, its beautiful. I see it now.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Do you really?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 No, I dont see it!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Come on! Come on! Here, okay-okay, you see this?  This tiny thingthat looks like a peanut?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Sweetie thats it.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Thats it? Well I saw that! Ohh-ohh-oh, thank you.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Youre welcome.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Wow! I cant believe thats our baby.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Yeah, thats our baby.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Hi.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 Hey!
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Hey! So how was the doctor?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh, everything went great.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Good.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh hey, show them the picture of your uterus.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Joey	 I dont see the baby. Where is it?
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Rachel	 Oh no, I know I couldnt see it either at first, but itsright umm  Ross, I lost it again.
08	03	0803	The One Where Rachel Tells...	Ross	 Oh. (He takes the picture and hugs her.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Wait. Before we go in, I just want you to know I love you. I had agreat time on our honeymoon, and I cant wait to go in there and spend the rest ofour life together.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Youre really sticking with the shell necklace huh? 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Hi!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Hey! Youre back! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Hi sweetie!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Come on in! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 So how was the honeymoon?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Oh, so much fun. But the best part is, we met this incredible couple onthe way back.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 That was the best part?  Good honeymooning tiger.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 No, they were really cool. They were on their honeymoon too!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Theyre terrific, and they live right here in the city.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Yeah, can we go call them? Is it too soon to call? I wanna call.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Im sorry, were just kinda excited because we finally havea couple to hang out with.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 I know.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 A couple? Like two people? Like  one , two people?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 This is different! Greg and Jenny are in a relationship.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Oh, Greg and Jenny yuck!  Hi Greg, Im Chandler this isMonica. Hi Monica, this is Jenny. Hi Jenny. Hi Greg.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Listen, they are really great. If you just got a chance
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yknow what? Why dont you just give us our souvenirs and getthe hell out of here?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 We reallydidnt get a chance to
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 You have got to be kidding me!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 We didnt get anything for anyone.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Hm-mm! Yeah nice necklace!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 That you can have.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Hi!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	All	 Hey!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hello!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Welcome home.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 So, how was the honeymoon?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 It was great! It was great! How about you?! I mean youre having ababy!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh! Look! I have a sonogram picture! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Oh great! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Ross! Its got your wavy black lines!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 All right, so now that Ross knows can you tell us yknow how ithappened? I mean, when did it happen? How many times did it happen?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Monica! Thats not right! Start with where.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home fromwork and Ross was already there cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Youre welcome buddy.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Yeah, thanks. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 And so I had a lot of work to do so Ross, nice guy that he is, offeredto help me out. And then we had a little wine, we got to talking, and the next thing youknow out of nowhere Ross comes on to me.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Umm thatsthats a little misleading.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 What is?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 The lie you just told.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 That-that you came on to me?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Theres the one!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 But you did! I mean, lets be honest.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Yes lets. Yknow what? Uh, its-its not important.What is important is that, is that were having a baby. And itsnotDoesnt matter who came on to who.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Whom.  Thats right.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 You know you kissed me first.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 What? What?! You were begging me to kiss you! You-you-you were sending mesignals all over the place!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 I was sending you signals?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Yeah!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh please. Okay, anyone in this room think that I would send Rossbegging symbols, please show of hands. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Yknow what?! It doesnt matter! It doesnt matter what youbelieve! What matters is what happened!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Okay. So these signals Ross, explain this to me, cause maybe Ineed to be more careful. I mean, am I sending you these signals right now?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Yknow what? Yknow what? Rachel, just-just drop it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 No please, show me how I begged you!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I can show you, I have it on videotape!  Its anexpression.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 I cant believe he taped the two of them having sex!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yeah! You gotta tell a girl before you tape her. Such a rookie mistake.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Yknow who has a great video camera?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	  Greg and Jenny?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Do you still wanna call em? I wanna call em.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Lets call em.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yeah! Ask them if they brought their friends any souvenirs!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Hello?  Eighth street deli?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Hey, hang up! You get food poisoning just talkin to that place.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Uh sorry, wrong number. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Here you go. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Hello?   Its the deli again!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 All right! Ill have a sandwich!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  I dont think this numbers right!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 What?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 You got fake numbered.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 What?! People dont do that!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Oh I think we do.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 They gave us a fake number? Why? Why would they do that?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 I dont know! You were a delight to talk to. You asked all thoseinsightful, great questions.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 And youve never been funnier. Joke, joke, joke, you were a hoot!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yknow what? Dont worry about it, you still got me and Phoebe.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Excuse me, I dont want Greg and Jennys rejects.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Rachel wont talk to me! She wont even open thedoor!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Hmm, I wonder why. Pervert!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Okay, listen I am not a pervert!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Thats like the pervert motto! Yeah! Yeah! They have you raise yourright hand, put your left hand down your pants, and repeat that!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Filming Rachel is not something I planned. Okay look, heres whathappened, and Joey you-you can back me up on this. All right, about-about a month and ahalf ago I came to you with a problem? Umm, a personal thing. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Personal thing? What personal thing? I dont know.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Aboutabout sex?  That I hadnt hadsex in months?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  Yeah I knew what you were talkin about.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hey!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Hey.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Do you have a minute? Id like to talk to you about somethingIm, Im really uncomfortable talking about.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Sure. What? About uh, you showering with your mom?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I actually had a topic in mind! Im, Im kinda going through adry spell, sex wise.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Whoa, for like months?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Five to be lying, six.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Six months? Whoa thats rough.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Well, I mean its not all bad. Im learning to appreciate theuh, smaller things in life. Like the sound of a bird and the color of the sky.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 The skys blue Ross and I had sex yesterday!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Please, help me! I have a date tonight. It has to go wellokayIm scared for my health!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Okay. Okay. UmmOoh! Oh-oh, I got something. Its this story Icame up with, very romantic. I swear any woman that hears it; theyre like putty.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Really? Well then tell it to me.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Okay. Now youre gonna want to have sex with me when you hear it, butyou have to remember it is just the story.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Ill try to control myself.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Okay.  Years ago, when I was backpacking across WesternEurope
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  You were backpacking across Western Europe?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Have a nice six more months Ross! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Okay! Okay! Okay. Im sorry. Please, please, you werein Western Europe and?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 I was just outside Barcelona hiking in the foothills of Mount Tibidabo. Iwas at the end of this path and I came to a clearing and there was a lake, very secluded.And there were tall trees all around.  It was dead silent. Gorgeous. And across the lake I sawa beautiful womanbathing herselfbut she wascrying
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Why?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Kristen	 Umm, this is great wine.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Its from FranceIn EuropeWestern Europe. Yknow umm,a few years ago I actually was backpacking across Western Europe.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Kristen	 Really?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Uh-hmmWait! It gets better. Um, yeah I was in Barcelona.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Kristen	 I studied for a year in Barcelona. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Anyway, umm so I was um, I was hiking
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Kristen	 I love hiking!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Oh thats great! I was hiking along the foothills of MountTibidaybo
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Kristen	 I think its Tibidabo.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Okay! Do you wanna tell the story?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Whoa! What are you doing here? How did your date go?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Great! Im across the street having sex with her right now. Yourstory sucks!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Hey! Look, if it didnt work its because you didnt tellit right! Show me how you did it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 No! No, I dontdont want to.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 How long since youve seen a girl naked?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I was backpacking across Western Europe.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Im not feeling it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I was just outside Barcelona, hiking
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 No! No! No Ross! Im not hot! Are you hot?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Its been six months! Im always hot!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Well youre not selling the story! Its like; its like youdont believe it! Look, I gotta go. I got a date, but try this. Do what I do whenIm preparing for an audition. Okay? Ill set you up with my video camera andyou can record yourself and-and see what youre doing wrong.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Ill try that.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 All right now All right, youre all set up. Youre good togo. Just hit record. All right?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Thanks.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Good luck.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Thanks. And-and hey Joe?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yeah?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Listen, if you ever have any problem with the ladies you know Illhelp you out.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  That means a lot to me man. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hello! Can I get you anything? Huh? Lens cleaner? Your battery okay? Rachel!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh Ross!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hi!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were you just talkingto yourself?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Thats less embarrassing, yes. Yes I was.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  So when she came in, I got distracted and totally forgot aboutthe camera.  It kept rolling and recorded everything.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Yeah, were gonna need to see that tape. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Yeah, definitely.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 What a great idea! That will get Rachel to forgive me!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yknow what? This is not fair to her. Lets just forget thetape!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Thank you. No!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Youre right. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Joey! No!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Loud and clear! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 I still don't get why Greg and Jenny would give us a fake number.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Yknow, if they knew what they were doing they probably didntgive you real names either.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Okay, maybe people give out fake numbers, but they dont give outfake names.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Oh yeah?  Hi, Ken Adams, nice to meet you.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Regina Philange. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 I still dont get it, we didnt do anything wrong.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 I know! Although, you did tell an awful lot of jokes.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 I thought you said those jokes were funny. Joke! Joke! Joke!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Joke. Joke. Blah! Blah! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Well maybe it was all of your questions.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 What about my questions?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 The sheer volume, it was like flying with the Riddler!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Oh, Im sorry. Was that another joke?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	  Was that another question?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Hey! Is Ross still here?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 Uh no Rach, hes gone. But listen, he told us what happened and itdoes, it sounds like an honest mistake.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh really? Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I tapedit?  Oh forget it!  Oh there he is now, the father ofmy child, the porn king of the west village.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Look, it was accident! Okay? I-I feel bad that it happened, but I swear, Ididnt even watch it! Anyway, here.  Ithought you might be more comfortable destroying it yourself. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Thank you.  What?  You dont want to see this do you?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 Hell yeah!!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 I am not gonna show you this!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 No! Not the sex part, just the stuff leading up to it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Forget it, shes destroying it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Okay fine! Fine! Well just have to think of some other way to putthe whole Who came onto who, thing to rest! Come on now, think!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Look, forget it Phoebe. Okay? Its Rachels tape and she can dowhatever she wants with it. And she wants to destroy it. So, end of story.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 I wanna see it.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 What?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Clearly you dont want people to see this tape. Now I dontwant people to see this tape either, but you so badly dont people to see it makes mewant to see it. You see?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  Are we watchin the tape or not?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I dont want people to see it for your sake.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Ahh, I dont believe you. I think you dont want them to seeyou begging me. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Rachel, please
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Ah, a little preview!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Fine. Fine, but I want the record to show that I tried to take the highroad, because in about five minutes Im gonna be saying
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Okay, here we go. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Hello! Can I get you anything?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  Im so happy!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Oh, thank God youre here! You have to help me! Were youjust talking to yourself?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 There I am.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Youre gonna get pregnant.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  I screwed up so bad, I told Monica that I would stuff and sendall these wedding invitations like weeks ago and I-I
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  You didnt do it?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  I-I knowI had put them inin-in my desk at work andI completely forgot about them until today.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Sweetie okay. Its okay. Everybody madeit to the wedding. Im fine.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Kinda hurtin my hand though.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 I know.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	   I cannot believe that I didthis. Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! "Okay Rachel! Here are the invitations Rachel! Now be very careful Rachel! Please,drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel!"  Whoa oh! Oh-oh-oh!Ohoh-oh-oh
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Did you do it on our invitations?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Not on the ones we sent out.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 So, just the ones gave back to us and we had framed! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Can you believe this is already happening? I mean it seemslike yesterday they just got engaged.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  I know. Hey rememberremember the night they got engaged?How uh, you and I almost
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Oh, I remember how we almost. Do you think we wouldvegone through with it? Yknow, if we hadnt gotten caught. Do you think wewouldve done it?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  I mean II know I wanted to. I just, I just wasntsure if you wanted to.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Oh I wanted to.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  So wewe both wanted to.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Interesting.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	  Yeah.  Anyway umm, it probably worked out for the best.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Oh yeah, sure.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Okay, in about ten seconds youre gonna see him kiss me.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 And in about five seconds youre gonna see why.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	  Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I wentbackpacking through Western Europe?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Okay, get ready to see some beggin!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Phoebe	 Oh, you came on to Ross!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 What?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Now Im so happy.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 What are you talking about?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	 You used the Europe story!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Thats the magic story you use when you wanna have sex!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 How do you know about that story?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	 How do you know about that story?!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 I heard it from my friend Irene who heard it from some guy!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  Some guy!! 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 No. No, she told me his name was Ken Adams.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Joey	  Ken Adams!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hi.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 So uh, apparently people are familiar with the Europe story?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Yeah. Listen about that, the whole uh, who came on to who thing reallydoesnt matter. I mean, I think it wouldve happened either way. I mean if youhadnt initiated it I-I-I know I wouldve.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 It was an amazing night.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 It was. It was an amazing night.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 You think it looked amazing?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I uh I dont know. I mean II honestly didnt watchit.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Yeah, me neither. Yet
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Uhhhhhhthat-that may be weird.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Yeah, it would be really weird.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Good luck.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Good luck to you.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Mind if I mute?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh please. 
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Oh, oh there go the clothes.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 You are undressing very quickly.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Six months Rachel, six months.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross, Rachel	 Ah.  Oh.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Hey. We-we lookwe look pretty good.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Thats what I was gonna say.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Oh nice tan!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Thank you! I had just gone to the beach that weekend.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Ah.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Have you been working out?
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 I have been working out.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Really? Wow, this is so much better than I
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross, Rachel	 Ohh! Ew!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Oh thats not pretty.
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh! Oh!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 No!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh God!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Oh no!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Oh, make it stop!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 Oh no!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Make it stop!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 No!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Rachel	 Have to make it stop!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Ross	 No!!!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Hello Greg?  Hi, this is Monica from the plane?Listen, the number that you gave me 853-5   That is their oldnumber! Jennys been giving it out since they moved!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Chandler	 Jenny! That is so Jenny!
08	04	0804	The One With The Videotape	Monica	  Hey listen umm, how would you like to get together? Say nextSaturday?  Okay, how about Sunday?  Okay umm, the week after that? The week after that?  Yknow what Greg? Yknow what? We aregood, interesting, funny people with good questions and if you and your preciousJenny cant see that then  January 15th? Well see you then!  Okay! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay, now this one is rare, this one is medium well! Now go-go-go! Hey Phoebe!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Hey how was dinner?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Dinner was good! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Im just saying hi! Now Im gonna go! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	  Oh, well hello there.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Guy	 Hi.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	  I didnt see this on the menu.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Uh Tim? This is Phoebe. Phoebe this is Tim, my new sous chef.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh, so you're Monicas boss?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Actually shes my-my boss. Sous is French for under.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh! I sous stand.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Hey Tim? I need a calamari and a Caesar salad. And umm, could you get methe pesto?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Yeah.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh youyou made pesto?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Yes I did.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Would you say your pesto is the best-o?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 II-I dont know, but I would say its pretty good-o.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 All right, I still need a calamari and a Caesar salad.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 I like your necklace.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 I made it myself.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 You are so talented.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Well, its no pesto.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 All right, all right! Lets just cut to the chase, okay?  Youre single.  Youre single.  He gets off work ateleven.  Shell be waiting for your call.  Ill give him yournumber if I can get one calamari and one Caesar salad!!  Idid not yell. I am not putting a dollar in the jar.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Wow Bing! Burning the midnight oil.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 You know me sir. Oh ah, I do have a question for ya. Do you know how Iget around the office computer network so I can access the really good Internet porn?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Youre a joker Bing. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Whats funny about that?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	  Hey! Sorry I kept you waiting so long.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Hey thats okay. So, where do you want to go?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Oh ah, I think you know where I want to go.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 The Hard Rock Café?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Again?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah!!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Im telling you, I like the food!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 You like the Purple Rain display!  Hey Bob.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Hey Toby! Have a good night. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Did that guy just call you Toby?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Yeah, he thinks thats my name.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Well, why dont you correct him?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Oh its been going on way to long now. Yknow, I mean thefirst time he said it we were just passing each other in the hallway, so I didnt sayanything. And then the next time he said, "Hey Toby, do you want a donut?" AndI-I wanted a donut. And now its five years later, the donuts gone and Imstill Toby.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Five years?! Chandler you have to tell him!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 No! That would be so awkward! LookBesides, we work in differentdepartments. Hes on the sixth floor yknow? So he calls me Toby once in awhile. Whats the big deal? It could be worse, its not like hes callingme Muriel. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	  Muriel. Wh-why would he call you Muriel?  Oh my God! Chandler M Bing? Its not just an M, your middle nameis Muriel!!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Shh! It is a family name!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Chandler Muriel Bing. Boy, your parents never gave you a chance did they?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 Drake, Ive discovered the reason for all your headachesand memory loss.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Dr. Drake Ramoray	 What is it?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 Apparently your brain transplant was not entirely successful. Itseems your body is rejecting Jessicas brain.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Dr. Drake Ramoray	 Is it serious?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 Not if we extract tissue from the original host body, synthesizeantibodies, and introduce them into your system, which could stop it from rejecting thebrain.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Dr. Drake Ramoray	 Well that sounds simple enough, lets just do that.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 We would, but when we went to exhume Jessicas body, it wasgone.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Director	 Cut! Very nice people!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	  Okay, let me just get changed and we can go to dinner.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Well dontWhat happened to Jessicas body?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Im not telling, youll have to see it on TV!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 You dont know do you?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 No, couldnt care less.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 Hey good scene man.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey you too!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey'S Co-Star	 Alright.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 What? You werent in it.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Oh sorry. Uh-uh, Kash?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Yes?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 This is my friend Rachel. Rachel, Kash, Kash, Rachel.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Hi.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Hey! How come I havent seen you here before?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Well, Joey probably thinks Ill just embarrass him. Yknow, hethinks Im some kind of a soap opera nutWhich Im not! Im not.Although I do know that your uh, your favorite ice cream flavor is butter pecan.  And uh, and that your-your dogs name is Wally. Well look at that,Im just stroking your arm.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	  Here we go! Here we go! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh, were leaving. Bye Kash.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Bye.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Say hi to Wally.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Ooh Monica!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I had the best time with Tim last night. He is sosweet! Oh, I cant wait to get sous-neath him.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 II have to fire him.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 But why?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Because hes terrible! Okay, hes slow, he burns things, lastnight he lit my pastry chef on fire!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Well maybe he was just nervous, yknow you can be veryintimidating. And besides Ive met your pastry chef and she can stand to be takendown a peg or two.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Well, now she has no eyebrows, mission accomplished.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 But Monica, he loves his job so much! Can you just give him anotherchance? Please?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	  All right, but if-if he lights someone else on fire heis out of there!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Thats fair! Thank you so much. Thanks. Oops, it looks like when hegot the pastry chef he got you a little bit too.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 I paid to have this done.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Love it!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Oh you know uh Kash, really liked you the other day. He said he thoughtyou were charming.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 I thought I was a complete idiot.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey, Im with you. He even asked me if I thought youd go outwith him.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh! Oh, I think Im gonna throw up a little bit. What did you say?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 I said no.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 What?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 What? II just figured since youre pregnant youre notgonna be seeing people.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Okay Joey, first of all Kash Ford is not people. Second of all, what didhe say when you told him I was pregnant?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 I didnt tell him. I didnt know if you were telling people.This is back when I thought Kash was still people.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Good-good, dont tell him. Dont tell him. Just have him callme okay?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Rach look, I really dont think thats such a great
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Okay, you go do it! Ill come back to that set! Ill meet moreactors! Ill meet em all!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Hey Bob.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Hey! Hows my pal Toby doing today?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 If I see him, Ill ask.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	  Toby!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Hey-hey! Bing? Was that Bob from six you were just talking too?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Yeah!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Oh then you know each other.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Were on a semi-first name basis.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 What do you think of adding him to our team?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Bob? Ooh, working here with us? Everyday? Yeah, I dont know ifhe has what it takes.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Really? They love him down on six.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 But this is eleven. Its almost twice as hard up here.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 Okay, I hear you loud and clear. Bob will stay put.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 I think its best sir.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	 But we really do need to find someone up here. The work isstarting to pile up. Ive got a stack of documents on my desk this high.  
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Yknow what you should do, just toss em in the shedder andclaim you never got em.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mr. Franklin	  Thats a good one. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 What does a guy have to do to be taken seriously aroundhere?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Hey. Okay, I gave him another chance, but Tim has got to go!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 But
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 No! No-no! He is totally incompetent. I called the chef who recommendedhim to me. He said, "Ha-ha! Gotcha!"
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Okay. Okay, but you cant fire him today.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Why not?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Because Im dumping him today.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 What?! You said he was sweet!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 He is sweet. Hes too sweet. He calls me all the time. "So did-did you get home from work okay?" "Did-did you getout of the shower okay?"
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Just dont pick up your phone.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Then he comes over!  "Im so worried aboutyou." Uck! Be a man!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 What? So now Im not allowed to fire him?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 You cant fire him and dump him the same day, hell killhimself.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay well then, Ill fire him today and you go out with him foranother week.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Are you kidding?! Another week with that sip, Ill kill myself!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay well, then well both do it today and hell just have todeal with it!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Okay. But the question is whos gonna go first. Cause whoevergoes second is the bitch.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 What do you mean?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Come on! The boss that fires a guy thats just been dumped, bitch!And the woman who dumps a guy thats just been fired, blond bitch!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 I wanted to do this days ago so I think I should go first.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 All right, that makes sense.  Ugh.ButScrew you Im going first! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Hey Toby, you got a sec?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Sure, whats up?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 I just had a meeting, I was actually hoping to get transferred up here, butI just found out its not gonna happen. Apparently somebody thinks Im not eleventhfloor material. Say uh, who the hell is this Chandler?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Hey, what do you think is a better excuse for why Im not drinkingon this date tonight. "Umm, Im a recovering alcoholic. Im a Mormon,"or "I got so hammered last night Im still a little drunk?"
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	  Hey!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 So, what do you want to do tonight? Theres a Ukrainian film at theAngelica thats supposed to be very powerful. Interested?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 No. No. But Ill go see a normal person movie with ya.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Rach? You wanna come?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh no, I cant. I got a date.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 A date?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Yeah. Why? Is that weird for you?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Why no, its the opposite of weird. Its-its uh, regular.Its-its uh, its mundane. Its actually uh, a little dull.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Its no Ukrainian film.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 YeahOoh! Earrings! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 A date?! Shes-shes got a date?! With who?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 I set her up with this actor on my show.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 You set her up?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 No
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Joey what-what were you thinking?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Well, I was thinking that itd probably be okay because Rosshasnt gone out with Rachel in five years!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Joey, Im not worried about her! Im worried about my baby!Whoever she dates my baby dates! Now-now where is this  actortaking them?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey! Im an  actor too! Imnot sure. I think theyre taking the ferry out to some Italian place on StatenIsland.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 A ferry? My baby is going on a ferry? Do you have any idea how dangerousthose are?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Are we talking about one of those big boats that carry cars that go likefive miles an hour?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Why dont they just jump out of an airplane?! Huh?! That-thatsa fun date! Or burn each other with matches?! Thats fun too! Whew!!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Hey Joey.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey Kash. Uh hey-hey this is Ross. Ross, this is Kash.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Hey.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Hi. I-I hear youre going on a ferry tonight.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Yeah.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 A bit of a daredevil are we?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	  Hey guys do you think this is toosluttyHi Kash!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Hey Rachel! You ready to go?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Yeah! All right, Ill see you guys later.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Okay. Have a great time you guys.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Thank you.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Kash	 Thank you.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yes it is too slutty! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	  Hi! 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Hi.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Oh, Im so glad you called. I feel like its always me callingyou. So, whats up? Is everything okay with Phoebe?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 It will bein a minute. Listen, Tim youre a really great guy.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Its because Im with you.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Aw.  ImjustIm in a place in my life right now where II
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Whoops. Sorry.  This just in.  Oh, its 9-1-1 from the restaurant, that means Monica needs me rightaway. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh-oh no she doesnt! I know what that is. You can stay.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Awww, Ill miss you too Pheebs.  And I will beholding you, right here. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 So what movie do you want to seeAnd not another one I have to read.Okay? I get enough of that from books.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Books?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 All right, car magazines, cereal boxes, but its like enough!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Well, I tell you what. Why dont we uh, why dont we just stayhere? Lets not see a movie, well just hang.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 And just wait for Rachel to come back from her date?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Hey, if thats what you want to do Im not gonna say no.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Dude! What is going on?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 I justI have to find out how it went.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Why?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 This guy could be my babys stepfather!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 They go on one date and youre worried about them getting married?!Hes not you!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 I justI-I cant believe shes-shes dating?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Well Ross, what did you think she was gonna do?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 I dont know! I guess I just cant believe any of this ishappening.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 What do you mean?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Its just I always thought when I had another kid it would bedifferent. Now I-I love Ben, but every time I have to drop him off at Carol andSusans, its likeIt breaks my heart a little. I mean Ive always hadthis picture of me and my next wife in bed on Sunday and, my kid comes running in andleaps up onto the bed. And we all read the paper together. Yknow? Maybe fight overthe science section.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Thats a nice picture. Maybe you can still have that!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 No! No I cant. I mean Rachels out with some guy. My baby wentwith her. If anything that picture keeps moving further away.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey, can I ask you something? In this, in this picture of you and yourwife, is your wife Rachel?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 It used to be. Now she doesnt really have a face. Smokin bodythough.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Good call. Yeah. But, the face Ross, the face isnt Rachel.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 No but ahh! How much easier would it be if it were?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 I know, but I dont think thats what she wants.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 No, its not what I want either. I mean I-I cant force myselfto fall in love with her again now.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Thats okay Ross maybe you need a new picture. Okay? Its notgonna be what you thought, but no matter what theres gonna be a brand new littlebaby, your baby. Who cares what the picture looks like?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 Hey, I tell you what. Lets you and me go out and have some fun. Huh?Whatever you want. Come on!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	  We can still catch that Ukrainian film.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Joey	 No, I said fun!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Hey Toby!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Hey Bobby.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Its Bob actually. Hey, you work up here, can you tell me where thisChandler Bings office is?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Uhh yeah. Yeah, its  right, right downthere.  Right there, yeah. Can I ask you why?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 I want to talk to that bastard, see what his problem is.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Okay Bob listen uhh, Im the reason you didnt get the jobup here.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Toby dont.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Bob!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 Toby! Im not gonna let you cover for him. Anything you say right nowwill just get me more upset with Chandler!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	 Well that puts me in a difficult position.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Hey.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 I got your page, is everything okay?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Uh well that depends, how are things with Phoebe?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Oh its great! Its great! Thank you so much for introducing us!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Oh my pleasure. Okay, Im afraid Ive got some bad news. Phoebe!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Monica!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	  Youre fired!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	  Im breaking up with you!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 What?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Im, Im breaking up with you.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Youre fired.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Why?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Im sorry, Im justImIm just not readyfor a relationship right now.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Yeah and-and Im sorry too. But, well I justI like thingsdone a certain way and the chemistrys just not right.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 Oh thats good, the chemistry thing for us too.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Wow! Umm, okay. Umm  I-I-I realize I came on a littlestrong but, its only because I think youre so amazing.  And uh, I-Ijust wanna, I just wanna tell you how much I appreciate you giving me an opportunity herebecause Iyoure the most talented chef Ive ever worked for. Anyway
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Tim wait!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Yeah?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Umm, I think I spoke too quickly. There-theres a learning curvewith this job and maybe we can try it again.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Really?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Yeah.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Tim	 Thank you so much! Cause I-I know I can do better!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Monica	 Okay.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Phoebe	 And Tim I just wanna say, good luck here. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Hello.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Well, how was the date?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Well Im alone and I just bought fifteen dollars worth of candybars, what do you think?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Uh-huh. What happened?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 I made the mistake of telling him that I was pregnant.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Ah, he didnt uh, take it so well?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Well better than you, but yknow still not what you want.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Oh?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 He got all weird and sputtery and then he said uh, "Yeah, I hearthose hemorrhoids are a bitch."
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 He sounds swell.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Doesnt he?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Hey, wannawanna a little cheering up?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Yes.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Sit down. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Okay.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Guess whose middle name is Muriel.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	  Chandler M. Bing?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah-ha!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh my God. 
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Im sorry about your date.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh its all right. Im guess Im just done with the wholedating thing. Its one more thing in my life thats suddenly completelydifferent. This is hard.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah I know.  On the other hand in um, in about seven monthsyoure gonna have something that youre gonna love more than any guy youveever gone out with. Just wait. Wait until uh, wait until the first time your baby grabsyour finger. You have no idea.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Thanks sweetie.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 You wanna, you wanna grab some coffee?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh no, I think Im gonna go home and eat ten candy bars.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Hey, I thought I cheered you up.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Oh you did, there are twenty in here.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Right. Good night.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Rachel	 Good night.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 Ross?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Yeah?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 Hey its Mona! From the wedding.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Oh hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 Hi!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Wow! Uhhow are you?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 Im good except umm, you still owe me a dance.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Oh thats right. Well uh, would you be interested in seeing aUkrainian film?
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	  Oh youre serious. Sure!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Great! Well umm
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 I think I might need one more cup of coffee.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Ross	 Sure! Uh, let me get it for ya.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Mona	 Okay.
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Chandler	  Bob. Bob! Bob!!!  What the hell are youdoing?!
08	05	0805	The One With Rachel's Date	Bob	 I just found out this is Chandlers office! Come on Toby, give me ahand!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Hey you guys?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 What?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 I know its last minute, but we decided to have a Halloween party.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Oh good! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 And everybody has to wear costumes.  Come on! Itll be fun!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Well, Ill-Ill be there. I mean I have to wear a costume to allmy classes that day anyway so
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Please tell me youre not gonna dress up like a dinosaur.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	  Not two years in a row.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Look, Ill come to the party but Im not dressing up.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 You have to!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 No way! Look, Halloween is so stupid! Dressing up, pretending to besomeone youre not
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Youre an actor!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Yeah. Yeah, I think I will.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 That hot girl from their wedding?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Well hey-hey if she needs any idea for costumes, she could be a bikinimodel, or a slutty nurse, or a sexy cheerleader huhOoh-ooh, Leatherface from TheTexas Chainsaw MassacreNo-no-no! Slutty Leatherface.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Now wasnt Joey hitting on her at the wedding too?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Thats right! He was hitting on her, and I got her. I guessthe better man won.  Please dont take her from me.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Ursula!  Wait! Err-err,its me! Phoebe!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Oh, I thought there was a mirror there. Okay, bye-bye. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Wait a second! So, whats new with you?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Umm, nothing. I mean, Im getting married next week.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 What?!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Yeah! Yeah, its gonna be a small ceremony. Just family.  His.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Huh. Okay. Well, Im really happy for you. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Wait! If umm, if you want to come, I guess thatd be okay.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Really?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Sure! Why not? You could be my sister for the day.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yeah. Okay. Umm, yknow, my friends are having a Halloween partytonight at my old apartment so, you could come. Maybe I could meet the guy youremarrying.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Huh. Well, Im supposed to be working at the restaurant tonight.Im supposed to be working right now, so who cares.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 By the way, its a costume party.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Oh! Okay, so thats why youre 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	  No. But thanks. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Hi!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Wait! Youre supposed to wear a costume!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 I am! I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants towear it, because soon she wont be able to fit into it.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Oh. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Ahh!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Im Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when youre toobig for it.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Okay.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Kids	 Trick or treat!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Oh! Oh! Can I give out the candy? I really want to be with the kidsright now. Yknow, ever since I got pregnant I-I have the strongest maternalinstincts.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Kids	 Trick or treat!!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	  Just a minute!!!  Look at you guys! Wow! You are a very scarywitch. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Witch	 Thank you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 And you are a very funny clown. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Clown	 Thank you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	  And you are so in style right now. Yknow, I workat Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme goingon. I dont suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Cowgirl	  Can I just have the candy?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Yeah. Sure. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Ah, Catwoman. So we meet again.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 So we do Supergirl.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No, its me. Phoebe!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	  Monica!Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	  Oh, you did this to him?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 What?! I thought hed love it! His favorite kid's book was the VelveteenRabbit!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 The Velveteen Rabbit was brown and white!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Well, it was either a pink bunny or no bunny at all.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 No bunny at all!! Always no bunny at all!!!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Hey!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 You didnt dress up either?!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Yes I did! Im Chandler.  Dude, what happened?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 How is that me?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Okay. Im Chandler 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	  That is so you!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 When have I ever done that?!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 When have I ever done that?! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Girl	 Trick or treat!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Oh!  Well youre just theprettiest ballerina Ive ever seen.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ballerina	 Thank you. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Oh wow! That deserves another piece of candy.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ballerina	 Thank you. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Well, I have to say that earns tutu pieces of candy.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ballerina	 I love you! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Ohh Oh, honey here. Take it all.  Monica! We need more candy?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 What?! Theres only been like four kids.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Yeah I know, but one of them just said that she loved me so I just gaveher everything.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No wonder your pregnant.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	  Hey! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Hey.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 What are you supposed to be?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Remember the Russian satellite, Sputnik?  Well,Im a potato or aspud. And these are my antennae.  So Sputnik, becomes Spud-nik. Spudnik!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Wow! I dont have the worst costume anymore!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Hey all right, Ross came as doody.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 No, I-Im not doody.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 No, space doody!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Arent you gonna give me a kiss?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Okay, I will. But right after you tell me who the hell you are.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Ursula?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Ursulas fiancée?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Oh my God, youre the sister!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Okay, I just slapped my future sister-in-laws ass.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Im an idiot. Uh, is your mother here? Maybe I can give her a littleslap on the butt.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 My mother killed herself.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 She, now I knew that andnow Im sweating. Look at me, Imreally sweatingNow Im saying, "Look at me," Im getting evensweatier. I think I probably should go.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No-no! Thats okay, well just start over. Okay? Hi! ImPhoebe.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Eric. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Why are you looking at me like that?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Cause the sweats getting in my eyes and its burning.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Okay.  So, what are you?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 I dont think they have a name for it. Its just I get nervous;I start sweating like crazy.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	  No I-I meant your costume.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Oh umm, Im the solar system.  Yeah, my students helped me make itI teach thesecond grade.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 I love the second grade!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Really?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yeah! Its so much better than first grade when you dont knowwhats going on and definitely better than third grade. Yknow with allthe politics and mind games.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 So what do you do?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Umm, Im a masseuseby day. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Yknow you dont have to stand here with me, believe me
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No Im having fun. Im reallyAnd Im really-reallyexcited for you and Ursula.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Oh I feel very lucky, shes great. I think shes the mostbeautiful woman Ive ever seen.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Thank you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Hey Joey?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 You read comic books right?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Exclusively.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Who do you think would win in a fight, Catwoman or Supergirl?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Catwoman, hands down.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Yeah
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 But between you and Phoebe, Id have to give the edge to Phoebe.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 What?! Really?!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Are you kiddin? Phoebe lived on the street. Okay? Plus, shesgot this crazy temper. SheShes not standing right behind me is she?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 No youre fine.  All right well, do you thinkI could take Rachel?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Im not sure.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 What?! Come on I am tough! Punch me right here!  As hard asyou can!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Will you relax?! What are you taking this so seriously for? Itdoesnt matter.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Oh really? Okay? Well what would you say if I told you that,yknow, Ross or Chandler could beat you up?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 I would say, "Woman, please!"
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	  Hey. Ursulas fiancée is really sweet!Hes a teacher, he does all this volunteer work. Yknow normally yknow, Idont like really sweaty guys. But this one? I could just mop him up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Oh my God, Phoebe!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 What?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Youre getting a crush on your sisters fiancée.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No Im not! You are!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Here comes the temper.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Girl	 Trick or treat!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Hi! Yknow what honey, were actually out of candy right now.But someone just went out to get some and I have been giving out money but Imout of that too. Hey, can I write you a check?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Girl	 Okay!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Okay, whats your name?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Girl	 Lelani Mayolanofavich.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Okay, Im just gonna write this out to cash.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	  Hi!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Hey Mona!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Oh! Hi!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 Hi!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Joeys gonna be thrilled! He was hoping youd come by as aslutty nurse.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 Umm, actually Im just a nurse.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Youd think that would embarrass me, but you see Im maxedout.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Hey!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 Hi!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 You made it!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 Wait-wait! Youre umm, youre a potato
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Well, Im a spud
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 And the antennaeOh my God youre Spudnik!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Yes!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	  Marry her.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Okay, heres a good one for ya. Who do think would win in a fightbetween Ross and Chandler.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 I cant answer that! Chandlers my husband.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 So Ross?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Hey beautiful.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Hello handsome.  Oh God.  Oh look at you two. So when did you guys meet?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Two weeks ago.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Two weeks? Thats it?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and its not like me to do something soimpulsive, but shes just so perfect, and we have so much in common.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Oh really?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Were both teachers.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Huh? 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 And we were both in the Peace Corps.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Peace Corps, really? 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 In fact when we were building houses in Uruguay, we were, we were just twotowns apart and we never met.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Yeah. It wasnt a town when I got there, but it was a town when Ileft.  Shall we get me really drunk?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Sure.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Howdy doody.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Thats funny. Yeah. Yknow youre the funniest man here ina pink bunny costume his wife made him wear.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Oh relax man, relax. Youre looking a little flushed.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to ourquestion.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 What question?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, youor Ross?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Theres no question.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 So you think Ross too?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	  You picked Ross?!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Ross is really strong! Okay, hes the strongest out of all three ofyou!  Except for Joey.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 I cannot believe you didnt pick me.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Uh, in her defense, shes right. I am stronger. I would destroy you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Oh really?! You think youre stronger? Why dont you proveit? 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Oh Ill prove it! Ill prove it like a theorem!! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop!  Now listen, noones gonna fight in this apartment.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Hey Monica!  People came tosee a fight, lets give em what they came for!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	 Hey, you guys could arm wrestle.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Yeah. Listen to the slutty nurse.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	  Youre going down.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Oh yeah? Youre going further down! Downtown!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Seriously guys, the trash talk is embarrassing.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Oh Gunther! You brought candy! Thank you so much for picking this up!You are so sweet.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Gunther	 Really?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in theworld.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Kid	 Trick or treat!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Gotta go!  Hi! Wow! There you go!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 My friend Lewis told me you were giving out money.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Oh yeah, we were but umm, now weve got candy.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 Id rather have the money.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Well, that-thats not your choice. Happy Halloween!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 This isnt fair.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Well is it fair that all you did was put on a cape and I gotta give youfree stuff?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 Shut up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 You shut up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 You cant tell me to shut up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Uh, I think I just did. And uh-oh, here it comes again. Shut up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Rach?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	  Yeah I knowIm goodI got it!   Now wait a minute, Ive got one more thing I have to say toyouoh right! Shut up!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Boy In The Cape	 Youre a mean old woman. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 No! Wait no! Shut upI mean dont cry! Let me get mycheckbook! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	  Look honey, you dont have to do this, okay?Its the strength you have inside that means the most to me. Youre loyal,youre honest, and you have integrity! Thats the kind of strength that I wantin the man that I love!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 That means nothing to me.  Come on!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Hi liar!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Hey!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yknow the only reason hes marrying you is because he thinksall the things you were saying about yourself were true.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Well they could be true.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 But theyre not!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Yeah, its a fine line huh?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Why are you lying to him?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 I dont know. He said he did all this stuff and then I said I didit too and he got so excited, it was really fun.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	  Honey?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	  Its a filthy,disgusting habit and I want you to quit now!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Shes helped so many people to quit smoking.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Yknow, wed really better get going.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Oh right, youve got a church group meeting tonight.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Right. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	  Well, it was nice meeting you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 You too. And Ursula?! It was really nice meeting you tonight!!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Pheebs come on! Bunny vs. Doody! Were waiting!   Okay. Okay guys, one match, winner take all.  Oh wait-wait! What does the winner get?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Pride.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 And dignity.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Okay, if you say so. All right, ready? Set! Go!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	  Wow! Theyre both really strong.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Or equally weak.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	  Oh God!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Hmm?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Chandlers making his sex face.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	  So, you gettin tired?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Nope! I can do this all day.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Yeah? Me too.  Gettin a little tired though.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 God, Im exhausted.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Look this is starting to look really bad for me. Okay? Mona, Monasstanding right over there.  Oh God, shes talking to Joey! Yougotta let me win!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 No way! If anything youve gotta let me win! My wife thinksIm a wimp!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Hey, at least you have a wife! I-I keep getting divorces and knockinpeople up! And Im dressed as doody.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Youre Spudnik.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Come on, who are we kidding? Im doody. Please? Sheswatchin.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Fine.  Oh no! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	  Oh yeah!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Mona	  Yay! My hero!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	  Youre a weird lady.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	  Hey. Ursula said she left her purse.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	  What a relief. It has all the numbers of the people in herprayer chain.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Sure it does. Yeah, yeah.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Well, I guess Ill see you at the wedding. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Umm listen, I dont thinkI dont think Im gonnamake it to the wedding. So I just want to wish you all the luck in the world.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 I think well be okay. Besides its so perfect and shes been saving herself for me.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Okay I cant let you do this! Shes lying to you.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 What?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 She is lying! And I bet I can prove it. Excuse me.  Okay. Okay.YeahNot a prayer chain, but what looks like a detailed drawing of a bank floor plan. Okay, heres the nametag from the restaurant where she worksas a waitress! Not a teacher, a waitress. All right, heres her driver license, thisoughta be good, she always lies about this. How old did she say she was?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 She told me she was 25.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Oh, I almost dont want to show this.  Justremember Im a minute younger.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 I am so stupid. Of course she was lying! Shes not a teacher.Theres not such a thing as the top secret elementary school for the children ofspies.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 No. Youre not, youre not stupid.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Im not smart.  I just wanted so muchtobe impulsive once. To be romantic.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Thats good, you should be impulsive and you should be romantic.Justyou did it with the wrong person.  What?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Its just so weird, two people look so much alike, and so different.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	  Eric!! Lets go!!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Eric	 Id better go, deal
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, you should. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ursula	 Hurry up I gotta pray!!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Hey!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Hey! Well, I had to give the kid fifty bucks to stop crying.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Thats not so bad.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 No, I also had to go to a couple houses with him as his girlfriend. Oh,I am just awful with children!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Come on! Youre good with kids. Theyre just crazy on Halloween.Yknow, theyre all greedy and hopped up on sugar!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Rachel	 Really? You think thats all it is? 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Joey	 Absolutely! Halloween is the worst. Except for Christmasand theirbirthdays. Kinda get a little crazy during the summer too. And anytime theyre hungryor sleepy. Yknow, kids are tough. Good luck with that. 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Look, I wanted to tell Im-Im sorry you lost.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Listen, Ive got a secret for ya. I let him win.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	  Is that a secret or a lie.
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 No, I let him winRoss!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Yeah?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Would you tell her I let you win please?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Ross	 Oh. Yeah.  Uh Chandler let me win. No,Chandlers really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 I am strong! Ill show you! 
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Chandler please!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Oh whats the matter? Are you scared?
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Monica	 Lets go big bunny!
08	06	0806	The One With The Halloween Party	Chandler	 Okay. 123Go!   Im gonna kill myself!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Dutch Phrases By	 Kenny Walgraef
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Hey.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Hey.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh my God! You cleaned!  Look at these floors! You did thewindows! Oh, I have been begging you for months and you did! You cleaned! And naggingworks!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Yknow uh, I didnt actually do this.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh no, was I cleaning in my sleep again?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 No, it wasnt you.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Well then who?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 I got a maid. Yay!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	  I hope by maid you mean mistress, because if some other womanwas here cleaning then
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Uh honey, I know you dont like to relinquish control
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh, relinquish is just a fancy word for lose!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Look, shes really nice. Okay? And she mentioned that she adoredthe way that you arranged the sponges.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Did she really say that?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Yes, I distinctly remember cause I thought it was a joke. Nowjust give her a chance, okay?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Fine, I can do it.  Whew.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Whats the matter?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Well, usually when Im this anxious, I clean!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	  Whos cell phone is that? Its just soannoying; everywhere you go.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 I think its coming from your bag.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	  I never get calls!!  Hello?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Hi, its Eric. From the Halloween party, Ursulas fiancée. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh my God Eric hi! Wait, howd you get this number?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Oh, I have a friend whos a cop and he got it for me.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Wow! What an incredible violationand wonderful surprise.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Uh listen, I justI thought you should know I broke up with Ursula.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh you did?  He did it! He did it!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Wow! What did he do?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Shhh! Im talking.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Anyway, I was wondering if, you were the sort of person whoeatslunch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Are you asking me out? Cause it would be kinda weird since youjust broke up with my sister.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Yeah uhokay. Im-Im sorry. Bye.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 No! Wait! I was just saying that so youd think I was a goodperson. Fight for me.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Uhh, I wont take no for an answer.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Not great, but we can work on it at lunch. Okay, I can be at yourapartment in two hours.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Great! But wh-whHow do you know where I live?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Ive got friends too. Okay, bye.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Bye.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Im going out with Eric! Ooh, this day is really gonnabe so much better than I thought it was gonna be. Oh Ross, I cant make lunch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 So apparently Im available for lunch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 I cant. Im busy. Im apartment hunting.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Youre moving?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Yeah, I cant live with Joey once the baby comes. I dont wantmy childs first words to be,  "How youdoin?"
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 So does-does Joey know youre moving?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Well, I havent discussed it with him yet, but I know hesgonna be relieved. Last week, he brought this girl over and I started talking to her aboutmorning sickness and then I showed her pictures from my pregnancy book.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Thats not really porn.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Not so much.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Hey, yknow what and if youre looking for a place? I just heardin the elevator this morning that a woman in my building died.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Oh my God! Was she old? Does she have a view?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Well I dont know, but how-how great would that be huh? You living inmy building. I could help take care of the baby. I can come over whenever I want.  With your permission.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Yeah that would really be great.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Well can we see it?! Oh maybe we shouldnt. I mean if she just diedthis morning out of respect.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah. No. No youre right. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Shall we?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 Yes?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Hi. Im Ross Geller. I live in the building.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 And Im Rachel, an admirer of the building.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 I-I heard about Mrs. Verhoeven passing away and Im so sorry for yourloss.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 She didnt pass.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 What?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 My mothers still alive.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Oh, thank God!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 It looked like we were gonna lose her this morning,but shes a tough old bird.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Ahh.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 Are you close with her?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Of course! Uh yeah, she and I would talk all the time in-in  the laundry room. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 You speak Dutch?  Zeer vereerd een vriendvan mijn moeder te ontmoeten. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yknow I would its just painful.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 So shes really not dead.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 No, shes hanging in there.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Hmm. Do you thinkCould you tell me if shes hanging in, in aone bedroom or a two?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Mrs. Bing, this tile cleaner is incredible! Whered you get it?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh well umm, I make it myself! Its two parts ammonia and one partlemon juice. And now the secret ingredient isyknow what? We just met.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Okay. Uhh, Im gonna go get the clothes from the laundry room now.And, when I come back Ill clean behind the refrigerator.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	  I love her.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Ill be back in a minute.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Okay. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 See? I told you.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 She stole my jeans!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	  What?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 I have been looking for them all week and she is wearing them!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 So she stole your pants and then she came back and wore them in frontof you?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Dont you see? Its the perfect crime!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 She mustve been planning this for years!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 I will prove it to you! Okay? About a week ago I was wearing those jeansand I dropped a pen in my lap and it left an ink stain on the crotch. Now when she comesback I will find it and show you that stain!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Honey, isnt it possible that the company that sold the jeansmade more than just the one pair?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 I guess.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 So, shouldnt we go give her the benefit of the doubt before wegosnooping around her crotch?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Fine. Im just glad I didnt give her my secret ingredient.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Out of curiosity, what is your secret ingredient?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Yeah! 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Hi!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Come in, Im so glad youre here.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Yeah, me too. Not in the shaky angry way you are though.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Sorry, I just saw Ursula. I had to give the engagement ring back.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Just seeing her brought it all back. All the lies, the way she used me. IjustI got so angry just looking at herface.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Yeah.  Yeah.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Im sorry. I justwhen I look at you I see her. When I see her Iget a little bit angry.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Maybe this is too weird.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 No wait! Theres only a problem when I look at you.  Oh I got it! I got it. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 No dont tear out your eyes!!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 I was just, I was just gonna take out my lenses.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah try that.  So, is that better?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Not really. Youyoure blurry, but you still look like Ursula.Youre Blursula. Okay wait. MaybeIf I-if I just dont look at you for awhile.  See? Itit works. Im not,Im not angry at all anymore! This is a great date!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Look Eric, turn around.  Look, I like you, but itshouldnt be this hard. Yknow? This is our first date yknow? Firstdates are supposed to be about excitement and electricity and Ooh, he just touchedmy hand, did he mean to touch my hand? and yknow first kisses andsecond kisses. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Thanks for the coffee, or bedankt voor de koffie, Gunter. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Gunther	 Jij spreekt Nederlands? Dat is te gek. Heb je familie daar?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah, were done.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Gunther	 Ezel. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Ezel? Ezel? Ezel? 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	  Hey Ross! Listen, do you want to go see that new Imax movie ontide pools?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Really?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	  No. But I got Knicks tickets for you, me, and Chandler.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Sweet!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 All right, well finish your coffee; lets go.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Okay I-I just have to stop by my place first.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 To tape the game? You do this every time Ross, youre notgonna be on TV!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 No-no, I-I have to see if this apartment became available.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Oh, youre switching apartments?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Its not for me, its for Rachel.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 But Rachel has an apartment.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah, but when the baby comes shes gonna want to move.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 She is?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Yeah, you didnt expect her to live there with a baby did you?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I guess I didnt really think about it.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	  Ezel!  Hey Gunther!Youre an ezel!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Gunther	  Jij hebt seks met ezels. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Damnit!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Nice jeans!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Oh thanks! I like your top.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh.   Youre not gettin it.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 What happened?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh, I fell asleep.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 I was thinking about taking my lunch break.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh, will you do the top of the cabinets? Thatll really work upyour appetite for lunch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 All right.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Hello.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Whats going on?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Im sorry. Ive never had a maid before, is this not okay?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Hey!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Hey!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 How was the game?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Oh, okay. II ate way too much.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Oh.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Ooh.  So umm, I wastalkin to Ross and he said you were looking for a new place.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Hopefully across the street if certain Dutch people would justlet go.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I was kinda hoping youd stay.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Oh but Joey, I have to go. Theres no room for a baby here.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 No room? Its a baby. Its like this big.  Yknow, I mean you-you could you could put it over here. Or-or-or we could put it right here.  Aw, its cute, right? Or-or wecould put it over here.  You wouldnt even notice it.Wheres the baby? 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Honey, its not just a matter of where you put it. I mean a babychanges everything. They cry all the time. I mean imagine bringing home some girl andtrying to score when theres a screaming baby around.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I could use a challenge! Its getting pretty easy.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Honey, its so sweet that you want me to stay, but I-I cantdo that to you. I mean it would disrupt your entire life.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I love living with you so much. I just wish things didnt have tochange.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 I know.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Yknow I blame Ross for this.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 I do too a little bit.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Im gonna miss you, youre the hottest roommate I ever had.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Ooh, oh no! I have to go! I have a massage appointment.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Oh no, stay here well keep doing this. Ill pay you.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 No, I got in trouble for that before. Ill see you later.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Absolutely.  I love the way youkiss.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Really? Thats the thing Im worse at! Youll see.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	  Hi!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Hey! Umm, I think Brenda needs a raise.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 How come?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Because I put my head between her legs.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 To see her pants?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Theyre my pants!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Are you sure? Did you see the stain?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 No! I was just getting into position and then everything went dark.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 God! She is not stealing from us! Okay, will you let this go?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Fine.  Shes wearing my bra!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Oh dear God!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 My pink flowered bra! I recognize the strap!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 And yet you dont recognize that youre crazy.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Heres the plan! Okay? Im going to leave you get a look atBrendas bra!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Heres another planNo!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 I would do it but she thinks Im attracted to her!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Why?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Did you not hear where my head was? Come on! Come on were ateam! Were in this together!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 I fear a jury will see it the same way!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Do this for me! Come on, I catch you looking at womans breasts allthe time!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 You see that?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Do you see this? 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 All right. Yes. Okay. I get your point. But if its not your brawill you just let the woman clean the apartment?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Yes! Absolutely. Okay? Look, youll know its mine because onthe right cup, the lacey part, theres a very noticeable rip.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 You need new clothes.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Hi. How is she?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 Its not looking good.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	  Oh.  Oh. Well I uh, I brought her somebloemen. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 Thats so sweet.  Would youlike to come in and say good-bye? Im sure it would mean a lot to her.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Oh I dont know that it would.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Mrs. Verhoeven'S Daughter	 Well, her memory is pretty much gone.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 All right then. 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	  Hey!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Welcome back!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Hey!  Can we pick up where we left off?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 I dont know, Im still pretty tired out from this afternoon.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Why?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Uh, the sex.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 What sex?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Our sex.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 We didnt have sex.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Well if I didnt have sex with you, I had sex with someone thatlooked an awful lot like
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	  Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	  Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! No! No! No!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 You-youyou had sex with Ursula?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Uh, a little bit. She-she-she walked in and I thought she was you and Ikissed her and
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 You didnt notice she was wearing different clothes?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Well I was just so excited to see you.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Oh. Ew! Ew! Ew! Ugh! Yknow what? This is too weird.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 No-no its not! I dont want to lose you! Its-itslike I was saying to Ursula when I was making love to her and I thought she wasyouYeah it is too weird.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 So I guess this is it.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Eric	 Yeah.  Maybe its for the best. You smell just like her.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Phoebe	 Yeah, so do you.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	  What are you doing?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Im leaning. This is where I lean.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Okay. (Goes over and fluffs up the pillows on the couch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Brenda a bee!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 What?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 Yes! Its flown into your blouse and youd better undo yourbuttons lest it sting you!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 I think I know whats going on here.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 You do?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	 Look, I know it must be hard that your wife is a lesbian, but itswrong. Youre married.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Chandler	 I totally understand.  Can I just see yourbra?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Hi!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	  Where did you get those jeans?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 You gave them to me!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 No I didnt!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 All right, I took them. But I figured it would be okay because you got abig ink stain on the crotch.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Oh no! Did you take my bra too?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 What bra?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 The pink one with the flowers?!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 You mean the one that youre wearing? 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Brenda	  I quit! 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Monica	 Sounds about right.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 What is this?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Hey! Uh, this is just to give you an idea. Okay well, we can put screenshere,  so that the baby has privacy, and-and-and maybe a mobileover the crib. And uhOh look! Heres a baby monitor , which untilthe baby comes we can use as walkie-talkies. Huh?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Youre so sweet.  Oh my God! Andyou gave the baby Hugsy! 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Ahhhhhhhhhhhh. That-that-thats really just to show where thebaby would go. Yknow why dont I hold on to him so that theres noconfusion? 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 But Joey the baby is going to be crying, its going to be loud.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Im loud!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Its gonna be up all night!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Im up all night!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Its gonna poop!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Hello!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 What about all the women you want to bring home?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Look, if Im bringing home a woman who cant stand being arounda baby, then maybe I dont want to be with that woman! Or maybe well just do itin the bathroom of the club!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Joey, are you sure?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Yeah! All rightLook, I know sometimes itll be hard, okay? But,itll also be reallyreally great. Please Rachel! I-I-I really want you to stay.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 I want me to stay too.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Ohh!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Thank you.  Oh Joey and look at this crib! Its so cute!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I know! I found it on the street.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Are you seriousReally?! Its in such good condition.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Yeah.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Wow! Whoa-whoa whats under the covers?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 I dont know.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Its moving.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Ew.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Its stillIts got a tail! Get it out ofhere! Get it out of here!!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Ooh! Ah! Okay! 
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	 Well, the old lady died. And how do I know? Her dying wish was for onelast kiss. But I dont care,  because you got the apartment. Yes!
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Rachel	 Ewww. Yeah. Umm. I think Im gonna stay here.
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Joey	 Isnt that great?
08	07	0807	The One With The Stain	Ross	  Ezels!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	  Hey Pheebs?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Huh?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Im having dinner with my dad tomorrow night, do you wanna come?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Sure. Yeah, hes kinda sexy.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Oh no, no, Ill be there too.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Okay so, well just come up with some kind of signal if itsgoing well you can take off.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 No Phoebe! I just need you there for support. I havent told himIm pregnant yet.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Oh. Why not?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Cause I know hes gonna flip out and I hate it when hesangry.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Oh Rachel, this is all so Papa dont preach.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 What Phoebe? Wait! One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever sawme doing that again hed make me eat the entire pack.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Wow! Oh well, I will be there! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Thank you.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Gosh. Im not gonna let that man make you eat your baby.  Oh. Hey! Whois that guy? I think I know him.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	  No you dont!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	  No you dont.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Oh my God!!! Monica!! Hes the stripper from your bacheloretteparty!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Her what?!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Your secret bachelorette party
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 You had a bachelorette party?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 She untied his G-string with her teeth.  Somebody stop me!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 I thought we werent gonna have bachelor/bachelorette parties!Yknow, we agreed that it was a silly tradition.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Its a grand tradition!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Im sorry, they surprised me. There was nothing I could do!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Well you couldve untied it with your hands.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 This is so unfair! The one thing I wanted to do was throw my best friend abachelor party, but no, I wasnt allowed to. All I got was a stupid steak dinner!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 You went home with the waitress.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Oh yeah, that was a pretty good night.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 I cant believe you didnt tell me! You know that thetwo pillars of marriage are openness and honesty!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Ugh, I knew giving you that book was gonna come back and bite mein the ass!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Oh, I-I dont eat meat.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Its chicken.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Yeah, I dont eat that either.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Ill never understand you lesbians.  So baby, tellmewhat is new with you.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Well actually umm
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Waiter	  Your 74 Lafite sir.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 74?! I ordered the 75! Thats a magnificent wine!The 74 is sewage! Why would you bring me sewage?!  Isthat a hard question? Are you an idiot? Is that why youre a waiter?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Waiter	 This is why I told the manager I wouldnt wait on you tonight!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Oh come on! Dont be such a baby! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	  In case you didnt notice, that is a scary man.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Hes right though, the 74 is absolute piss.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 This was such a huge mistake. I cant tell him Phoebe. Icant, I cant, I cant, I cant
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Rachel!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 No its okay, this is whats gonna happen. Im gonna waita couple years and then the baby will tell him.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Why, so he can get mad at the baby?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Hey, that is thebabys problem.  Oh,everything okay with the waiter?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 I have no idea, I went to the bathroom. So sweetie, you were startingto tell me what is uh, what is new with you.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Well Umm, I got TiVo.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Whats TiVo?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Its slang for pregnant.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Phoebe!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Are you really pregnant?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Well uh, yes and no. Except not no. So to sum it up, yeah.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Who is the father? Oh no! Please dont tell me its her!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 No, its Ross. Its Ross. You like Ross.  Oh daddy, I hope youre okay with all of this. I mean think about it, this isa good thing. Youre gonnaThis is your first grandchild! Youre gonna be apoppy!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Thats true. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	  Poppy.  Oh, Im gonna be a poppy.  So when is the wedding?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Who?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 The wedding! Theres going to be a wedding. Young lady,dont you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is going to be a bastard!  Rachel Karen Green, tell me there is gonna be a wedding!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 February 2nd!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 So it was really cool seeing you lecture today.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Oh thanks. Although it kinda seemed like you were falling asleep there alittle.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Oh no-no, I-I had my eyes closed so I could concentrate and yknowtake it all in.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Yeah, a lot of my students do that.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 So, I gotta get going.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Okay, I-Ill see you tonight.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Yeah. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Okay, bye. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Oh hey, thanks again for showing me your semi-precious stone collection.It was amazing! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 My God! You must be good in bed!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 So uh, you and Mona, been a while now. Hows it going?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Ah, its good. Its going good. I mean, we get along great.Shes, shes so
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Hot?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Well, I was gonna say sweet, but yeah-huh!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Shes okay with Rachel and the baby?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Well II havent actually told her yet. I dont want toscare her off, yknow?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Well, you have to honest with her! Otherwise you may think thatyoure going down the same path, but youre really going down different ones.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Im gonna take that book and beat you to death with it.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	  Oh my God! You are gonna love me so much! I felt really badabout the whole bachelorette party thing, so tonight youre gonna have a bachelorparty.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 What?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Yeah, I got this number from this guy at work and I hired a stripper tocome dance for you. Am I going in the wife hall of fame or what?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Honey! Thats crazy! I dont want you to get me astripper
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Will you let the lady talk?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Come on! Come on, itll be fun! Itll make me feel so muchbetter.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Look, I appreciate it, but uh, its a little creepy. Yknow?Im not a bachelor anymore.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 So dont think of it as a bachelor party, think of it as aatwo month anniversary present.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Sure, one year is paper, but two months is lapdance! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Please! I feel so bad! Just watch the hot woman get naked!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 All right fine! But Im only doing this for you!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Yeah!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 And Joey.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Thank you. All right, now who else do you want to invite?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Ah, no-no-no just Ross. Ross and Joey is embarrassing enough.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Uh actually, sorry I cant even make it. Im seeing Mona againtonight.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 I understand: who would cancel an actual date to go to a fake bachelorparty?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	  Im sorry I gotta cancel tonight baby
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Im sorry I wont be able to make it to your imaginarywedding, but Im really busy that day. Yeah, I already have a unicorn baptismand a leprechaun bar mitzvah.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 I know. I know. I panicked, I panicked. I didnt want him to startyelling at me like I was some 74 Latour. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Its Lafite. The 74 Latour is actually drinking quite nicely.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 All right here he comes. Im gonna do this, Im gonna tellhim, Im gonna be strong.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 I just called a friend of mine.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Yeah?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 I think I may be able to book The Plaza on short notice.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Really?! The Plaza?!! Oh daddy!!  Right. Daddy, I need to talk to you. Please, sit down.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 What is it sweetie?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Theres not gonna be a wedding. Ross and I are not getting married.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 What?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Im sorry daddy.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 I dont believe this!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Oh now daddy, stay calm. Please.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Stay calm?!! How do you expect me to stay calm?! This is unacceptableRachel! And I wanna know why?!! Is it because that punk Ross wont marry you?!Thats it! Is that it?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Yes. Yes, he says Im damaged goods.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 So you uh, nervous about getting married?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 What are you doing?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Look, look lets pretend its a real bachelor party. Okay?Yknow? Before your wedding. Come on, itll be fun.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Okay. I cant believe tomorrows the big day.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 How does it feel knowing youre never gonna be with another womanagain huh? Knowing youre gonna have to wake up to the same face everyday until youfinally have the sweet release of death.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Youre right, this is more fun.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Thats her! Okay, come on! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stripper	 Hi!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Hi. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stripper	 So which one of you lucky boys is Chandler?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Uh, that-thats-thats me!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Thats me.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Joey Tribbiani, a big fan.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stripper	 So is that a bedroom? 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah right over there.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stripper	 All right, whenever youre ready. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 That was weird.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Why-why would she go in the bedroom?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stripper	 Im waiting.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 So shes a
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Yeah, thats one naked hooker!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 I love your place! Where is this guy from? 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Uh thats an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Oh wow! So, youre more than just dinosaurs.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 So much more.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Oh my God! Oh my God! Im so sorry!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Aw forget it, its from Pier One.  Sorry. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 You think you can knock up my daughter and then not marry her?!Im gonna kill you!!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Yknow this is actually not a great time for me.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 So? Come on! Explain yourself Geller! First you get my Rachelpregnant!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 You got Rachel pregnant?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Who did?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 You did!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Yes. Yes, yes I did.  But-but it was, it was just a one nightthing. It meant nothing.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Oh? Really? Thats what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 No! No sir umm, she means a lot to me. I mean, I careI-I loveRachel.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 What?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	  Oh but not that way. I meanI mean Im not in lovewith her. I love her like a, like a friend.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Oh really? Thats how treat a friend? You get her in trouble andthen refuse to marry her?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	  Hey! I offered to marry her!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Wh
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	  But I didnt want to.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 Well why not? So you can spend your time with this tramp?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Tramp?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Im sorry. Dr. Green, Mona. Mona, Dr. Green.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 I cant believe there is a naked hooker in there!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Wait! Wait! Maybe shes a hooker and a stripper, but she gotconfused about what shes supposed to do.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Could be. I mean technically she did strip, we just, we just missedit.  Maam, are you also a stripper?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Hooker	 Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but thats gonna cost extra.Okay, heres the extras, handcuffs, spanking 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Maybe Monicas playing a joke on ya. Yknow? Getting her ownhusband a hooker, thats pretty funny.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 That is funny, maybe for my birthday shell murder someone.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 I bet Ross was in on it too. I mean he was conveniently busy.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Hooker	 Do you mind if I smoke in here?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Oh actually, Id rather youYeah, go ahead. Were gonnahave to burn that room down anyway.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 How could you have kept all of this from me?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 I was going to tell you, but
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	 But what?! You figured youd get what you wanted and then dumpher like you dumped Rachel!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Hey! I did not dump Rachel!  Nor are we still together.  Can I just  Why dont we just let themachine get that?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	  Hey Ross. Its Joey. Theres a hooker over here andwe thought maybe youd know something about it.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 No! No! No! No! No! I-I-I-II need to, I need to lie down.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 So, tonights the night of the big bachelor party?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girls number.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 No problem. So whos the party for?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 My husband.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 You hired your husband a hooker?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Shes a stripper.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 No, shes a hooker.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 When theyre hookers.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Oh my God Stu! I-I cant believe you did this! Now are youabsolutely sure shes a hooker?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Stu	 Either that or shes just the best, most expensive date I ever had.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Maybe she meant to get you a hooker.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Why would she do that?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Maybe she wants you to learn something. Huh? Now is there anythingyoure really bad at yknow, sexually?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 This is the worst bachelor party ever!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Hooker	 Whats taking you boys so long?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 In a minute!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	  In a minute? Whats gonna happen in a minute?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 All right, all right maybe-maybe you should just ask her to leave.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Why me?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Hey! Its your bachelor party.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Which is why you should do it.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 I dont want to. You do it!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 You do it!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 You do it!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 All right Rock, Paper, Scissors who has to tell the whore to leave! What?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 I miss this.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 I dont think weve actually done this before!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 No, I-I miss hanging out with you.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Well wewe still hang out.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable.Yknow now its likethings are different.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Well yknow, things are different. ImIm marriednow.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 Oh sureAnd hey, dont get me wrong, I am so happy for you guys.I justI misshanging outjust-just us, yknow?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what; from now on well maketime to hang out with each other.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	 You got it. Come here. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Hooker	 Oh God! Listen, I am this close to robbing you guys. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	  Shes a hooker! Shes a hooker! Shesa  Hi! Uh, we spoke on the phone. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 So your dad dropped by. Hes a pleasant man!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	  Oh no
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Id better go.  Just over here: I dont want to miss the fight.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Ross Im so sorry. Okay. I-I will promise I will straighten thisout with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 I dont care about your dad! I care about Mona! She was there and nowshes totally freaked out!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Oh okay, Ill fix that to. Whats her e-mail address?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Rachel!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 All right, I promise. Ill fix this. I swear.Ill-Ill-Ill-Ill talk to her.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Okay!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Okay.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Thank you!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Thats it?! You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on abreak!" "No we werent!" What happened to you two?!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Thank you so much for coming back over.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Oh good, youre here. Yeah, and I was worried that it was going to beuncomfortable.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 I know Mona, just hear me out. First of all, Im so sorry about myfather yelling at you, but I heard you totally held your own. Youre gonna have totell me how you did that.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Focus.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Okay. UmButOkay, yes Ross and I used to date. And yes we aregonna have a baby. But we are definitely not getting back together.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 How can I be sure on that?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Oh we justwe drove each other crazy!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Yeah.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 I mean he was possessive, he was jealous, he could never just let thelittle things go!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Trying to date this woman.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle andthoughtful he is. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Probably shouldnt touch me.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Yknow, I-I-I justI dont want to get in the middle ofsomething so complicated.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 I know, I get it, but Mona, what relationship is not complicated? I meanwe all have our baggage! You must too! Why else would you still be single?  I am so gonna leave right now. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Should I leave this open for you too?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Im not sure yet. Why didnt you just tell me about all this?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 Because whats going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feelabout you.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Yeah? Well you still shoulda told me.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Ross	 I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard itfrom Rachels father. Look II made a mistake, but its only because Ireally, really like you. Really!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Mona	 Okay, I guess you canclose the door now. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	  Forgot my purse!  Oh, you guys made up. Hes a good kisser isnt he? Im going! 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 I swear I didnt know she was a hooker! I mean whDid you lether smoke in here?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Her ass print is still on your grandmothers quilt, do you reallywant to talk about smoking?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Yknow what? Im gonna make this up to you. I promised you astripper , and youre gonna get a stripper. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Monica! Wait!
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 What?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	  Carry on.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Ooh, these tennis shoes are so tight. I think Ill take them off.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Chandler	 Could you not narrate?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Monica	 Gotcha sailor. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	  just because youre not in love with the guyyou cant
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	  Wow, you told your dad the truth.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 About an hour ago.
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Phoebe	 Wanna go see a movie?
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Rachel	 Yes!  Bye daddy. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Dr. Green	  theres gonna be a wedding! Thatsunacceptable Rachel! What the hell does love have to do with it anyway?! There are moreimportant things in a marriage other than love!  constantly thinking about things! You have to think about theconsequences of your decision. 
08	08	0808	The One With The Stripper	Joey	  Hey! I do too think about the consequences of my decisions! What gives you the right to  Go to hell!  Stupid guy on my phone.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Hey Rach listen, did you know that during pregnancy your fingers swell upto twice their size and never go back.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  Oh myGod! Let me see that! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  You fall for it every time!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	  Hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Hi!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 I brought you my old maternity clothes! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Oh Pheebs thats so sweetOoh,those are so cute!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Yeah! And look,  see how they expand as the baby grows? And then after the babys born, theyregreat for shoplifting melons.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  Oh good youre all here. Thanksgiving tomorrow, fouroclock.  Oh, guess who I invited. Remember that guy Will Colbert fromhigh school?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 No.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 He was in Rosss classmarching bandkinda overweight?Well, really overweight. I mean I was his thin friend.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Wow! I dont remember him. Honey, are you sure youre nottalking about your imaginary boyfriend.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 No that was Jarred! Wow! I havent thought about him in a longtime   Anyway, ummWills, Wills here on business and he didnt have a place to go so Iinvited him here.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Oh thats nice.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh, and by the way, hes lost a bunch of weight. I mean he looksgoo-ood! Okay, I mean really, really gorgeous!  I stilllove Chandler.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 I just want you to say it once in a while.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right okay, just so you know, Im not gonna make a turkey thisyear.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 What?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Well Phoebe doesnt eat turkey
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Phoebe!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Turkeys are beautiful, intelligent animals!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 No theyre not! Theyre ugly and stupid and delicious!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right! Okay, its just Phoebe. Wills still on a diet,Chandler doesnt eat Thanksgiving food, and Rachels having her aversion topoultry.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 She is?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roastchicken?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Yeah. But I thought that was because I put the whole thing on my hand andmade it walk across the table.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Anyway, it just doesnt seem worth it to make a whole turkey forjust three people. Okay? Its a lot of work.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 But you gotta have turkey on Thanksgiving! I mean, Thanksgiving with noturkey is like-like Fourth of July with no apple pie! Or Friday with no two pizzas!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right fine! If it means that much to you! But justtheresgonna be a ton left over.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 No there wont! I promise I will finish that turkey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right, youre telling me you can eat an entire turkey in justone sitting?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Thats right! Cause Im a Tribbiani!  And thisis what we do! I mean we may not be great thinkers or world leaders, we dont read alot or run very fast, but damnit! We can eat!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey, isnt weird to think about how next year at this timetheyll be a little baby at the table?   Rachels! But good to know where youre at!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	  Hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Happy Thanksgiving!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 You too!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Anything I can do to help?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Actually there is. Chandler usually helps me with this, but hesreally into the game so I dont want to bother him. Could you help me fold thesenapkins? 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Sure!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Im gonna go across the hall to check on the yams.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Okay. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 No! No! No! No sweetie! No! Not like that! Were not at a barndance. Youve gottayou wanna fold them like swans. Like I showed you atChristmas time, remember?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Yeah, it all just came screaming back to me.   So hows the game?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 I have no idea.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Yeah! Im just pretending to watch the game so I dont haveto help out with stuff.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 I dont believe you! That isbrilliant! And Monica has noidea?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Nope! Every once and a while I just scream stuff at the TV. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Is your team winning hon?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Yeah! Anderson just scored again!  Theres noAnderson.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Well I want to get in on this. Hey Mon? I dont think I can helpyou after all, I didnt realize this game was on.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh, I didnt know you liked football.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Well normally I dont, but yknowGreen Bay is playing.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 You like Green Bay?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Well its only like my favorite bay! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Happy Thanksgiving!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Aww thanks! God Will Im so glad that you came! You look great! Youmustve lost like
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 150 pounds. Yeah, Im gonna be in one of those Subway sandwichcommercials.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 A pie! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh right. All right, its no fat, its no sugar, its nodairyits no good. Throw it out.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 You wanna meet some people? This is uh; this is my husband Chandler.Chandler, this is Will.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Hey.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Oh hey. Id shake your hand but uh; Im really into thegame. Plus, I think itd be better for my ego if we didnt stand right next toeach other.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 This is Phoebe.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	  Hey.  Wow!  Welldone.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  Wanna give me a hand?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Sure! Monica, I cant get over how great you look! You look stunning!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Well you look incredible too! Youre justyoure so fit!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Im watching the game, but Im not deaf!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh umm, I meant to tell you, Ross is coming.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Ross is coming. Great! I love Ross!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Good. And Rachel Green too. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Is there a problem?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Nope. Uh, its okay. Its just uh, God I hated her.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yeah, I hated her. She was horrible to me in high school. But hey, it wasa long time ago, Im in a good place, it might be actually fun to see her again. Yougot any cakes or cookies or something?  No Will no!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	  Yknow, its been a while since wevescreamed something. Maybe we should.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Oh okay.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Oh come on!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Noooo!! Damn you ref! You burn in hell!!!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey, what are you doing? You gotta save room, youve got almost anentire turkey to eat.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Let me explain to you how the human body works. I have to warm my stomachfirst. Eatin chips is like stretching.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Dont worry, Tribbianis never get full.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 I actually know what youre talking about. Im here to tell yousomething my friend, you can eat and eat and eat but nothing will ever fill that void.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  Who the hell is this guy?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Will! From high school.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Oh hey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  Joey.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Hello.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	  Will!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Ross!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Hey-hey you came! Man you look incredible! Hot stuff!  Hot stuff?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Its good to see you man.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Yeah, you too. Man, so-so what are you up to?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Im a commodities broker.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Really? Yeah that-that sounds interesting.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yeah, its not. But Im rich and thin.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Oh! Man I dont think Ive seen you since uh, Lance Davisgraduation party.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 That was such a fun night!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Yeah. It wouldve been good if we had gotten in, but still real fun.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 God we were lame back then. Do you remember how into dinosaurs we were?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	  Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 So what do you, what do you do now?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 So how long are you in town?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  Hi! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey sweetie. Oh good. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	  Rachel Green.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Awoh, thats right. Are-are you gonna be okay?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh, Ill-Ill be fine. Just God I hate her Ross! I hate her!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Will, high school was-was a long time ago.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Look at her standing there with those yams! My two greatest enemies Ross:Rachel Green and complex carbohydrates.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  Oh my God Monica, who is that?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Thats Will from high school!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Oh! I do not remember him! Wow! He's really got that sexy, smolderingthing going on.  Oh my God, hes Lookat the way hes just staring at me. I think hes trying to mouth something tome, but I cant make it out. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Okay, dinners ready!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Good game!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Yeah. Solid effort. Solid effort.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh, so who won?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	  Green Bay.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	  Detroit.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Well the Lions technically won, but it was a moral victory for the GreenBayMermen.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Hi! Will, right?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Right.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Hi! Im Rachel Green.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh I-I remember you.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Really?! Arent you sweet! I gotta tell you though, I am, I amhaving the hardest time placing you. Oh-oh hang on! Did we umm, did we fool around atLance Davis graduation party?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 You are unbelievable.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Thank you!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  Uh Rachel? Rachel, why dont you sit here?  And Will you sit way over there. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Thats it?! Even if nobody helps me I can eat that no problem. Atleast give me a challenge!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  This is Chandlers chicken. This is the turkey. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  Oh. How-how big is that?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 About nineteen pounds.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  Its like me when I was born.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 All right, who would uh, like some yams? Will?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh, youd like that wouldnt ya?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 What?  Oh yknow what? Canwe please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table?The smell is just yuck!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	  Typical.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Im sorry. What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 I said it was typical. Typical of you, Rachel Green, Queen Rachel doeswhatever she wants in little Rachel land. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  Seriously, who is this guy?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Umm, Im sorry. Do you-do you have a problem with me?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 I dont know? Do I? Do I?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 I think you do.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	  Apparently you were umm, a little mean to him in highschool.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 A little mean? You made my life miserable!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Im-ImI had no idea. Im sorry. I
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Well you should be. Screw it! Bring on the yams!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh Will. But you-youve worked so hard
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yams!!!! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Okay. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Uh Will umm, I just want to say that Im real sorry for whateverI-I did to you in high school
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Oh, it wasnt just me. We had a club!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 You had a club?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Thats right, The I Hate Rachel Green Club!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Whoa! My God! So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! Whoelse was in this club?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Me and Ross. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 No need to point, she knows who Ross is.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  So you were in an I Hate Rachel club?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yes he was. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 No. No.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 So who else was in this club?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Uh actually, there-there was also that exchange student from Thailand butI-I dont think he-he knew what it was.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in anI Hate Rachel club.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 You went out with her?! We had a pact!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 That was in high school! Its not like it was binding forever.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Then why did it have the word eternity in it?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Okay Monica, did you know about this?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 I swear I didnt.  Hey! Is that why you guys usedto go up to your bedroom and lock the door?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross, Will	 Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hmm, a little relieved, I gotta say.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Look Rach I-Im sorry, okay? II was a stupid kid, okay? Theonly reason I joined
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Co-founded!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 co-founded. Co-founded the club was because I was insanely in lovewith you. Obviously I didnt handle it very well. But if you think about it the IHate Rachel Club was really the I Love Rachel Club.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Uh, except that it was really the I Hate Rachel Club.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Okay. So what? You guys would just like get together and like just saymean things about me?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Well, we did a little more than that.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 No-no! No-no. No-no.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 What?! What else did you do?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 We started a rumor.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 What rumor?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Oh, come on Will! Just take off your shirt and tell us!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Ross!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 It was no big deal. We-wesaid that the rumor wasthatummyou had bothmale and female reproductive parts.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 What?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Thats right! We said your parents flipped a coin, decided to raiseyou as a girl, but you still had a hint of a penis.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  Oh my God!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 You started that?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 What?! You heard that?! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Everyone at our school heard it!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Everybody at my school heard it! You were the hermaphroditecheerleader from Long Island?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Oh no!!!! Oh my God!! This is all making so much sense to me now! Thisis why Adam Carter wouldnt go out with me! This is why Billy Tratt would just stayin this region!  
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Actually, Billy Tratt is gay now. So-so that ones not really ourfault.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Monica, how come you never told me this?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 I thought it might be true. And I was afraid that you were gonna cry andthen show it to me.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Joey stop staring! Theres nothing there! Its not true!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Im afraid Im gonna need proof.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Oh! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 You are my Everest.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Joey, you dont have to finish that.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Oh yes I do. Otherwise whats next? Today Im just a guy whocant finish a turkey, but tomorrow Im the guy who eats half a Powerbar,wraps up the rest, and puts in the fridge? No! No, I justI justI gotta changemy pants.  Jeans have no give. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  Okay! Okay! Listen to what Sean McMahon wrotein my yearbook senior year, "Dear Rach, youre such a good person." Notgirl! Person!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Rach, I think youre reading a little too much into it.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	  "Dear Rach, youre a greatperson. Sorry about your tiney-wienie." 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Look, what do you want me to do? Do you want me to call everyone in theentire school and tell them it wasnt true?!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Yes!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Could you also tell them Im skinny now?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Oh! Me too!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Well look-look Im not calling anybody! Okay? It was like a millionyears ago!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 I dont care how long ago it was! You told people that I was halfand half! Yknow what? I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you inhigh school.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Thats not totally true.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 What?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Well you-you did start that rumor about Ross making out with Mrs.Altman, our 50-year-old librarian.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	   How did you know that?!!!!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Its true?!!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 No.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Yes it is! I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Mrs. Altman? She also made out with Takaka Ci-Kek the night before he wentback to Thailand.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Im sorry. When you were in high school you made out with a50-year-old woman?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Hey! She didnt look 50!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Did she look 16?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Ohh, theres a picture of her in the yearbook actually.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Oh!  Wow!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 She didnt photograph well!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Well, she probably wasnt familiar with the process having spentmost of her life sitting for oil paintings!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 So how did this happen? Did she, did she lure you to an early birddinner?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 I was working late in the library one afternoon. It was just the two ofus. She needed some help with her word jumble. And one thing led to another. If you mustknow, Anita was very gentle and tender. May she rest in peace
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Didnt she walk with a cane?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Only when it was damp!!  I cant believe you-you toldpeople about this?! Everybody knew?! Yknow what?  Im back in theclub!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Yeah! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 I wanna join!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 WhPhoebe!!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Im sorry. Im sorry. I never got to be in a club. I-Ididnt go to high school, but three of us would meet behind a dumpster to learnFrench. Bonjour.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 All right, yknowFine! You guys have your stupid little club,but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you!You gave me a tiney-wienie! 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 All right, listen youre just being silly. Rachel, even with thatrumor you were one of the most popular girls in school and everyone wanted to be like you.One girl wanted to be like you so much she stuffed her pants with a Tootsie Roll!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Wow
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 And Ross, if it werent for Rachels rumor I mean no one inhigh school would even know who you were. She put you on the map!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 As a romancer of the elderly.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey! Mrs. Altman was the kind of woman you could tell she used to bepretty.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 The eyesdid still sparkle.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Hey guys this stuff is just so way in the past. You-youve beenthrough so much since then. And right now youve got so much more important stuffgoing on in your life. Cant you just let this go?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 Shes right.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Yeah. I mean we are having a baby together.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Hold on! You got her pregnant?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Yeah.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 Are ya getting married?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Ross	 Nope.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Will	 So you knocked her up but youre not gonna marry her. Dude!  Anybody?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Okay.  Its exactly how Id imaginedit would be.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	  All rightwheres that turkey!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Joey! Those are my maternity pants!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Not now! These are my Thanksgiving pants!
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Well thats it. Im done. Whew!  There comethe meat sweats. 
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Well Joey, were allwere all very proud of you.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Chandler	 Yes, I believe we can expect a call from the President any moment now.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Phoebe	 Is there anything we can do for you?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 No just, nobody press on my stomach.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Rachel	 You can keep those pants by the way.
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Whoaheywh-wh-what do you got there? What is that? Pie?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Monica	 Yeah, you want some?
08	09	0809	The One With The Rumor	Joey	 Ah, just cut me a little sliver. A little bigger.  Little bigger.  What?! Are you afraid youre gonna run out?! Cut me a real piece!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Hey! So what do you think?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 New haircut?  Necklace?  Dress? Boots?  Boots!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Yes! Now, theyre a little more than I normally spend onbootsor rent 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Oh my God!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 I know.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Im gonna miss being able to afford food.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Im sorry, they just, they just look so good! And the saleswomanwas looking at me like, "Oh, these are way too expensive for you."
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 She had a point.  
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	  Hi!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Hey.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Oh my God!  Oh Monica! Those boots are amazing!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Theyre mine!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Yeah well, too bad were gonna have to return them.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Return them?! Shh! Theyre gonna hear you!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Honey, Im not returning them. Okay? I mean I-I know they cost alot, but Im going to wear them all the time. Youll see. Besides, I love thecompliments. I mean, have you ever had something so beautiful everyone wanted it?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 I have you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Nice try; Im keeping the boots.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Thats right, I love you! And-and Im gonna play with you allthe time.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 How can you let him talk to your crotch like that?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	  Hes talking to the baby.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Ohh! Okay! Okay, cause when-when he said, "I cant wait tohear your first words," I thought, "Theres a trick."
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Okay. Well, I gotta go you guys. Ill see you later.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Bye.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Bye. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Oh hey Rach, listenHi!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Hi.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Umm, can you do me a favor? I was talkin to my sister and she knowsyou work at Ralph Lauren
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 No, forget it! No way! I am not sending anymore Ralph Laurenclothes to prison. It is a waste.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 No-no-no-no-no-no, not her, not her. My youngest sister, Dina, shesreally interested in fashion, and she wants to talk to someone successful, yknow, togive her some advice.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 I guess I can talk to one of my supervisors
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Oh no-no-no-no, she wants to talk to you!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Really?! Oh my God! Im successful!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Okay, so will you meet with her?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Yes! Id love to! Have her come by the office.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Great! Thanks! Youre gonna love her so much. AndOh, shesthe smartest of all the Tribbiani children. Hey, yknow the S.A.Ts?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 She took em!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Hey Ross! Doesnt Ben go to the Smithfield Day School?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Yeah. Why?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Sting has a son that goes there too!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Yeah I know; hes in Bens class.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 You knew this and you never said anything?! With all the stupid dinosaurstuff you tell us?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Fine! No more dinosaur stuff! Can I talk about fossils? 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Stings son, seven years old and theres a picture.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 What are you reading? The Kidnappers Guide to Manhattan Private Schools?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 No, its New York magazine. Its an article about thebest schools in the city. So how well do you know Sting?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Uh, I actually havent even met him.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, yeah thats too bad. I really want to go to his concertFriday night, but its totally sold out. I know! Why dont you meet him and gettickets?! If you get two Ill take you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Well actually, Im picking Ben up tomorrow, maybe hell bethere.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 There you go! Oh, you are so lucky! You might actually get to meet Stingtomorrow! Thats why you have kids!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Hey guys!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Hey-hey.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Hi Monica!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Hey. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Hi boots.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 See Chandler? Im getting a lot of use out of them already!Theyre very practical. See, you can wear them with dresses, with skirts, withpants
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 You can wear them with shorts on a street corner and earn the money topay for them. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Wow! Theyre beautiful!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Ahh
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	  They hurt so much!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 What?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 The guy who made these hates feet and wants to see them die!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Well-well you can give them to me! I havent felt my feet in years!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 I cant! I spent so much money on them and I told Chandler thatId wear them all the time, I just cant give them away!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Well then get your money back and return them!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 I cant do that either! The soles are already a littlescuffed up and the insides are filled with my blood.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	  Hey!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	  Hey!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Hey I uh just picked up Ben from school
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	  I dont think you did a verythorough job!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 I dropped him off at Carols.  Anyway, it turns out thatIm not going to be able to get those tickets though.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh no! Why not?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Well it turns out that Ben and Stings son do not get along.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 How come?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Apparently, Stings son made fun of the fact that Bens moms arelesbinims.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Wait! But Ross if they dont get along then you shouldsmooth things over. Make them be friends.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Phoebe, you cant force kids to be friends.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Sure you can! Give them some blocks, put them in a playpen!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Playpen?! Bens seven!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Your kid is seven?!  Hes really small.  Please! Please get the tickets!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Look Im sorry Pheebs, I cant do it.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Yes you can! Sting says so himself!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 What?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	  Rosssss can!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Look Phoebe, Im sorry its just
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	  Rossss can!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Phoebe, I
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	  Rosss can! Give me the tickets! Ross can give me thetickets!!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	  Here she is! Future fashion superstar!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Oh Joey, Im hardly a
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 My little sister Dina!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Right! Hi Dina! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Hi.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Nice to meet you. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Thanks so much for meetin with me. Joeys told me so much aboutyou!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 This is so exciting for her. Well, Ill let you two fashistsget down to business. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Okay. All right Dina, well lets talk about the different areas offashion that you could get involved in. Lets see, theres design, but you mayneed a whole other degree for that. Uh, theres-theres sales, which is greatbecause you get to travel
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 II dont care about fashion! Im pregnant! And I know youare too, so you gotta help me!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	  And theres marketing
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	  Ahhhhhhhh!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	  Whats wrong?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Oh nothing Im justjust was yawning. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Oh dont forget, my office holiday party is tonight. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Honey, we dont really have to go to this thing tonight do we?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Now sweetie, I know you dont like my office parties, but you canwear your new boots. See? Every cloud has asupple leather lining.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 I-I dont-I dont think that Im gonna wear the bootstonight.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Why not?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Well yknow, Im just-Im just worried that bosses willsee them and think they pay you too much money. Or! Or your assistant will see themand-and want a raise!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Do you think I work at some kind of boot pricing company?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Anyway, I picked up this outfit that I want to wear and the, and theboots dont really go with it.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 You said that you paid all that money because those boots go withskirts, dresses, and pants!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Fine! If you want me to wear the boots, Ill wear the boots. Infact, Ill go into my room right now and yknow try the outfit on.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Okay.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay?  Ooo wee!Christmas party in my boots! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 I-I cant go in there. I cant tell him!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Honey, its going to be okay. Hes been incredibly supportiveof me, and if he gets a little upset; thats what the meatball sub is for. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Thank you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Okay.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Hey! Its my fashion girls!  Whatswrong?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Honey, why dont you sit down? Dina has something that she wants totell you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	  Oh. Whats, whats going on? Is it mom? Is she sick?Is it dads heart? Is that a sandwich?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Joe, mom and dad are fine
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Is that a sandwich?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Joeytheres something that youshould know. Dina?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Im pregnant.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	  What?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	  Now! Give him the sandwich! Give him the sandwich! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Well obviously this is a mistake! You cant be pregnant! Because youhave to have sex to get pregnant!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Joe, I tried to wait until I was 25 like you did!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 What?! Dina
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	  Bub!!!   Icant believe this! Youre the good one! You went to college! Both years! Whodid this to you?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Bobby Corso, but hes a real nice guy. I like him a lot. Hesreal funny.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 You got pregnant for funny?! Dinaif hes funnylaugh!All right, Ill be back in a little while! You stay here!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Why? Where are you going?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 I cant look at you right now! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Wow.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 I know.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh, there you are Ben!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ben	 Aunt Phoebe, what are you doing here?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Well, I heard youre having a problem with one of the boys in yourclass. And so I thought I would just come down here and sit you both down, have a littletalk and make it all okay. Now umm, the boys name is Stings son.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ben	 Jack? I hate him! Hes a jerk.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Now Ben, sometimes people may seem like jerks on the outside, but theyhave famous fathers.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ben	 I have to go. My friend Doug is waiting for me over there. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Him youre friends with. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Excuse me. Can, can I help you with something?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Yes! Yes you can, Im looking for Jacks parents.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Are you with one of the students?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, Im with Ben.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Are you one of Bens mothers?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 I am one of Bens mothers. Im a lesbian. It was, it wasdifficult coming out to my parents.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Well hi, Im Jenny Boone. Im the new teacher here.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Ive only met your partner Carol.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Ah! Okay so that would make me Susan.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Right. Are you looking for Jacks parents to discuss theproblems hes having with Ben?  Yeah. Because I reallydo think the parents should sit down and have a conversation.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Yeah! Lets do that!! That-that sounds good. We should sit down andtalk, just me, my lover Carol, and the Stings. Umm, how-how will I get in touch with them?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	The Teacher	 Oh, their number is on the contact sheet.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Umm, could-could I get a copy of that? Cause Carolthrew it out, she lost ours. Shes such a scatterbrain, but man what a hot piece ofass.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Yknow, that party wasnt bad.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Yeah! I didnt know there would be dancing. That was a funsurprise!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 I dont see any uh, cabs. Maybe we should just walk?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Oh no, we cant walk!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 What honey, its like fifteen blocks to the subway. Letsgo.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Hey! Do you think that we can get to the subway right there if we climbdown through the manhole cover?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Whats going on?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 I cant walk. Okay? Okay? These boots were a huge mistake!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 What?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay you were right! All right, I never should have bought them!Theyre killing me! One toe at a time!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 So I was right. This is what it feels like to be right. Its oddly unsettling.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 How are we gonna get home? Maybe a piggy-back ride?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Hop on.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay. Wait, just give me a second, I need to just get my boots offfirst.  AhOohOohhOhhOhGodOhhOhOhhOhhhh
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Honey, I know youre in pain right now, but Im a littleturned on.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Do you ever worry that youll be walking and your baby will just likeslip out?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 What college was that Dina?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Oh my God! Bobby!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 Hi Dina. Good to see you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Joey, what are you doing?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Just what needs to be done! Dearly beloved, we are gathered here to jointhis man and this woman
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Oh Joey this is crazy!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Dont interrupt me when Im talkin to God! Now where werewe? Oh right, okay. Do you Dina, take this man
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 No!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Oh youll take em!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 No I wont!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Hey! You dont get a say in this!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Yes I do!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Ahhh! I heard "I do", were halfway there! Okay! You!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 All right Joey! That is enough!  Listen, as beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, its not legal. Okay?They-they dont have a marriage license, they dont have any witnesses, and thegroom only has on one shoe!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 Yeah, he took the other one off and hit me with it.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Well what am I supposed to do?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Youre supposed to realize that they are adults! And that they canmake their own decisions.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 No they cant! They were stupid enough to get knocked up!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Heyyyyy! Contraceptives are not always effective! Right?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 Yeahwe kinda didnt use any
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Oh, come on kids! A little help here!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Wow! This place is incredible!  Stings penthat hegave to Phoebe. Come on! Secret passageway! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Hi! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Hi!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Im Trudie.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 You must be Bens mum.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Why else would I be here?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Do sit down.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-huh. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 I gather Jack and Ben havent been getting along lately.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Im told there are two sides to this story, but allIve heard is that Bens a bit of a poo-poo head.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Umm, Im sorry. Wont-wont Jacks father be joiningus?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Oh Im sorry, Jacks father is not available.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm. Okay. Well then, could we reschedule? For say, Friday nightperhaps at 8 oclock?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Oh no, I know that wouldnt work. My husbands inconcert.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Concert. Yeah. That does put us inquite a pickle. Because you seeIm very busy before and after the concert, and hes obviously busy during.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 So, I guess you and I should talk about Jack and Ben right now.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Unless! Unless umm, okay I-I would be willing to go to the concert, umm,all the while thinking about the children of course.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Are you here for tickets?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh, thank you. Four would be great.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	 Im not giving concert tickets to someone whod usetheir son like this!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh good! Then youre in luck! Bens not my son!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Trudie Styler	  Look, Ive just pressed a button, triggering asilent alarm. Any minute now, the police will be here!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 The Police? Here? A reunion?! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Okay, ten blocks down. Five to go.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	  Oh wait! Stop! Stop! Stop!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Oh Im sorry! Do you need a break?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 My boots in tan! Hey! Can you get a little closer so I can see theprice?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 I can see it from right here. Itll cost you one husband.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay, Im sorry. I think I can walk the rest of the way now.Just-just give me my boots.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	  I dont have your boots.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Well I dont have them either. Where are they?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Well, why dont you check in one of my saddlebags while I chew ona bale of hay!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay.  God well, we gotta go back and get them!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Honey, are you seriously ever gonna wear the boots again?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay, Im never gonna wear them again. I just didnt get achance to say goodbye.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Yknow what? You can say goodbye to the tan ones.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	 Okay.  All right.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Chandler	 Okay. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Monica	  Bye bootsWait! Half off?! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Joey, just because theyre not getting married doesnt meanthis is going to be a disaster. Maybe they have a plan!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Oh? Oh! Okay! Okay! Lets hear their plan! Now, whats thefuture look like for Dina and Bobby?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 WellI really have high hopes for my band.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	  You were right. He is funny.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Hey, now wait a minute! I get when you told people at first that youwanted to be an actor they laughed at you! Now come on Bobby, why dont you tell us alittle bit about your band?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 Well its just me and my pal Rooster, the bands name is NumbNuts.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	  Really? 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Dina, if youre having a baby you should be married! Even if it is toBobby!  Dude, thats not a compliment!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 No Joey! I knew you wouldnt be supportive!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 So whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! What are you gonna do? Youre gonna have thebaby and-and raise it by yourselfwithout a husband?! You cant be a singlemother alone! Youre gonna ruin your life!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Oh excuse me! Am I ruining my life?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 No! No! No! Its different for you. Youre so strong andtogether. Youre not some dumb kid who doesnt know what shes doing.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Excuse me?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 One pregnant woman at a time, please! I just want you to be okay.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 So forcing her to marry Bobby is gonna make that happen?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Maybe!  Well! Wellso-so uh, what kind of music does NumbNutsOh forget it! I cant!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Joey, I am scared to death about this. But I really think I can do it,Im just gonna need some help. And Bobbys gonna be here the whole time.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 You bet I am!  And to answer your earlier question, werestraight-up gangster rap. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Look, Rachels told me how much easier youve made all this onher. Why cant you do that for me?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Because! Cause Cause youre my baby sister!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 And youre my big brother! I mean, youre my favorite guy in thewhole world. Im not even scared to tell mom and dad. I was scared of telling you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Well Id be scared of them, but all right.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Joey, I cant stand the thought of having this baby with you mad atme. I want him to have his uncle. Is my baby gonna have his Uncle Joey?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Of course hes gonna have his Uncle Joey!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Dina	 Were gonna be all right. I mean, even if were not married thisbaby is gonna be so loved. Not just by us.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Thats right! By his uncle too!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Bobby	 And by you.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 Okay Bobby, why dont we just come over here and let them have alittle moment. 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Joey	 Come here! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Rachel	 No! Seriously! Whats wrong with you?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Youre gonna love me so much. I got Sting tickets!! 
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oh my God! I do love you! How did you do it?!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Welllets just say  Rosss caaaaan!
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Oo, where are the seats?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Uh, middle balcony.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Okay, now would you say that thats more than 50 yards away fromSting, his wife, or a member of his family?
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Ross	 Yeah.
08	10	0810	The One With Monica's Boots	Phoebe	 Then thats not breaking the law! Im there!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Phoebe?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Yeah?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Look at that guy by the window, wow!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Hes awfully short and I think hes talking to himself. And tobe completely honest, hes not that good in bed.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh, what is wrong with me lately? I mean its like every guy IseeI mean look here.  Look at that guy for example, I meannormally thats not someone I would-would be attracted to, but right now, with theway Im feeling, all I want to do is rip off his sweatpants and fanny pack.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Wait a second! This is about the fourth month of your pregnancy, right?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 This is completely normal, around the fourth month your hormones startgoing crazy.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Really?! So this has happened to you?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Oh absolutely yeah! Oh and keep in mind, now, I was carrying triplets soin, yknow, medical terms I was-I was thrice as randy.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Wow! This explains so much! Last weekend, I went from store to storesitting on Santas lap.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Yeah. Yeah, I remember trying to steal a cardboard cutout of EvanderHolyfield from a Foot Locker.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Ah.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Well, yknow what? I go see my doctor tomorrow, Ill ask herabout this. Maybe she can give me a pill or something.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Yeah. Yeah, thats what you need a goodpill.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Hey!  Hey!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Hi!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Hi! Look! I got our pictures developed from Rockefeller Center.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Oh great! Hey-hey Joey, do you want to check out pictures of me and Monaice skating?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Oh uh, ordinarily I would love too, but I am just swamped right now.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Hey where-where are the pictures that creepy pretzel vendor took of ustogether?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Oh yeah, probably at the end.  Oh my God! He only tookpictures of my breasts!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Im missin picture time?! 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	  Yknow she has a face Ross!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Okay. Okay, heres a good one of us.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Wow! That is a good one! Wow, it looks like a, like a holiday cardyknow, with the tree in the middle and the skaters and the snow.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Yknow, every year I say Im gonna send out holiday cards and Inever do it. Do you wanna, do you wanna send this one out together?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	  Together? Like-like to people?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Yeah, yknow. Happy holidays from Mona and Ross. Itll be cute,okay?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Okay. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Oh, I gotta get to work. So call me later?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Uh sure, sure.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Bye guys.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Bye.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	  Congratulations! You just got married!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 I know. Can you believe that?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Wait, Im-Im sorry. Whats the big deal about a holidaycard?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Married couples send out cards, families send out cards, people who havebeen dating for a couple of months do not send out cards! What-what is she crazy?!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey, hey thats your wife youre talking about!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Bing! Ho! And the Bing-ette!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Honey, you remember my boss Doug right?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Yes, hi.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Hi. So good news, the divorce is final. I signed the papers this A.M.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 I didnt know you and Carol were getting divorced, Imsorry.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Sorry? Finally chewed my leg out of that bear trap. Hey, congratulationsto you guys though!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 No leg-chewing for us sir.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Oh well, give it time. So the divorce, the marriage, weve got a lotto celebrate. How about we all go out to dinner tomorrow night?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 I cant think of anything were doing.  Whycant I think of anything were doing?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Tomorrow night it is then, I should be out of court by six. They keepthrowing these sexual harassment cases at me and I keep knocking them out of the park!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Okay, Ill see you tomorrow!  Just so you know,were not seeing him tomorrow.  I-I cannot spend anotherevening with that man. Do you remember how he behaved at our wedding?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 No.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Thats because he wasnt invited because of the way he behavedat our engagement party.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh yeah. Boy, urine cuts right through an ice sculpturedoesnt it?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Hi!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Hey!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Hey, I went by the photo shop, take a look, here is a mockup of our card.What do you think?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Huh. Wow, this is great.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Now, do you think it should say, "Love Ross and Mona?"
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Well, we-we havent said that to each other yet, but I guess its okayto say it to other people.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 How many did you want? Im getting a hundred.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 A hundred?! Well, I-I guess Ill take aMona, uhI-Imnot sure about the whole uh, card thing.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Really? Why not?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Sending out a holiday card, together, I mean I just dont know ifwere really quite there yet.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Oh yknow, I didnt think of it that way. Youre right.Youre right. So, can I ask you a question? 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Yeah.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Where are we?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Huh.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Yknow, like where are we? Where is this relationship going?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Hmm
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 I mean I love spending time with you, yknow I justI hopewere moving forward. I mean, we should probably talk about that. Dont youthink?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Lets do the card!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 What?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 The card! I think were there!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Okay. IBut I think we should still have this conversation.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Really?! I mean, even with the card?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Nurse	 Hi!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Hi!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Nurse	 Just so you know, Dr. Long cant be here today, she was called tothe hospital, so Dr. Schiff will be seeing you.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh, okay. Hey, can I ask you a question? Was it me, or-or was the guywho took my blood sample really cute? Yknow who Im talking about, baldhaircut, hairy fingers 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	  Hi Rachel? Im Dr. Schiff. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Yes, you are.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 So, hows it going?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh, really, really good. But enough about me, come on! Where-where areyou from? What do you do?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 Im a doctor.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Right! Right! I-I actually meant in your spare time, do you cook? Do youski? Or do you just hang out with your wife or girlfriend?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 Uh, I dont have a wife or girlfriend, but I do like to ski.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh, I love to ski! How amazing is this?!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 So, are you experiencing any discomfort?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 No. Im very comfortable.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 Any painful gas?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 No! Shoot, Dr. Schiff what kind of question is that?!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 Okay then, would you like to lie down on the table?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Well would you like me to lie down on the table?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Dr. Schiff	 Im sorry, is there something going on here?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Do you feel it too?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Hi.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Oh hey! So, how did your doctors appointment go?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Well, lets see. Uh, they gave me cute doctor today and in themiddle of the exam I put my pinky in his chin dimple.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Oh my God.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Why did you do that?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Okay, remember that little problem I was having during myfourth month ofpregnancy?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Oh yeah, the Evander Holyfield phase. Oh man you were so hard up youpractically came on to me.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 You wish.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Hey, I couldve had you if I wanted you.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Oh yeah? Come and get it.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Okay, even this is turning me on!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	  Hey!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh hey! Hey Ross! Hey hows it, hows it going with you andMona? Are you guys still together?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Oh yeah, yeah were moving forward. Youll be getting our card!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 You and Mona are doing a holiday card together?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Yeah, were not just doing a card! Yknow, she-she also wants tohave the conversation about where the relationship is going.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Ugh! Women!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 I know! I know! Why do you guys need to have this conversation?! Huh? Imean no self-respecting man would ask a woman, "So, where is this going?"
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Uh Ross? You asked me that.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Hey! You were a closed book! Okay? Im not a mind reader! Besides, Ihate those conversations. Im horrible at them. Really! Maybe-maybe I need kind of agesture. Yknow, something that says were moving forward without having to talkabout it.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Like asking her to move in with you?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Smaller than that.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Making her a mixed tape?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Uh, bigger than that.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Give her a key to your apartment.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Whoa-hello! We were closer with the mixed tape.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 All right. Have you said, "I love you?" You could say, I loveyou.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Yeah I-I dont-I dont think Im quite there yet, but Icould say I looove spending time with you.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 No, we hate that.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 That is a slap in the face.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Forget it. I-IYknow what? Ill just have theconversation. Ill just say I like things the way they are, and hope for the best.What do you think Rach?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 I think, if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipplesthrough that sweater.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Bing! Were all set for tonight, 8 oclock.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh uh, as it turns out, we cant do it. Monica has to work.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Oh, my ex-wife didnt work, unless you call turning into her motherwork. Fine. Tomorrow night then.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh uh well tomorrows no good for her either.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Oh? Why not?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Its the semi-finalsof herbotchy ball tournament.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Whats going on Bing? Does uh, your wife have a problem with me orsomething?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Well now-now youre just talking crazy.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 So why cant the three of us go out together?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Because uhwe-wewe split up. Monica and I split up. Holdme.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Good God Bing Iwell I cant say Im altogether surprised,I saw the way she looked at you, and there was no love there. And the way she looked atme, pure lust.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Yknow what would really help me through this tough time ischoking something. Can I choke ya?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Bing my boy, were gonna get you over this. Now heres the plan,grab your coat, were going to a strip club.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, Monica would freak.  But to hell withthat bitch.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Here we go. Mona umm, I think its time we-we had a conversationabout-about where things are with us.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Yeah, I-I think I suggested that.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Aw, we-we are so So umm, wellI-I-I like you and I-I love umm, yknow hanging out with you. And I mean-Imhaving a lot of fun. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Okay.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 I mean, theres no point in spending time with someone if-ifits just fun. Its gotta be, its gotta be going somewhere right? Sowhere-where is it going?  Ah! Thats-thats the real question. And-andthe answer isis its going somewherefun. Now I-I know what yourethinking, fun was fine for you like ten years ago yknow, but youre-yourenot getting any younger. No I meanNo not you, not you, youyou aregetting younger. I meanyou-you look like youre getting younger by thesecondWhats your secret?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Im sorry, so umm, so where are we?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Well, well to sum up, were having fun, you look young.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Okay
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 But thats not enough. So Soheres a key to myapartment. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Really?!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Really.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 You dont think this is too fast. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 You gave her a key to your apartment?!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Not just a key, I gave her the only key! I am now a homeless person in avery serious relationship.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	  Hey. Ooh Ross! Howd the conversation go?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Oh great, I live on the street.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Where?! 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Hey!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Hi! Okay, Monica, Rachel, this is my friend Roger.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Roger	 Hey everybody.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Hi Roger.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 So umm, Im gonna get us some drinks.  Would you help meout?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Yeah. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Umm, hes here to have sex with you.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 What?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Youre welcome.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Phoebe no!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Its okay, hes a virgin.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Rachel umm, I was just talking to this guy and I think hell havesex with you.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Yeah, okay lets leave these two alone.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 No! I do not care what my hormones are doing, I am not going to just doit with some random guy!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Fine! Then you tell Roger because he was really looking forward to this!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Oh Bing, look at those twin sisters dancing together. Let me buy you a lapdance with those girls. Huh?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh thats all right sir, and thats just one girl.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 BingWhats this?! 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Its a hand. Its a thing you use as a Jack and Cokeholder.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 No, its a wedding ring. You gotta get rid of it. Were gonna goto the East River right now and throw it in there!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Doug	 Oh yeah-yeah-yeah, yknow I did it and I felt a hell of a lot betterand if you whip it just right you might hit a seagull in the head.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Okay, and oh Im gonna need a bunch of extra keys. Apparently I givethem away for no reason at all.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	  Hey Ross, whats going on? You changing the lock?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 No. That guy is.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 I dont understand. You-you give me a key to your apartment and thenyou change the lock.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Locksmith	 Good luck buddy. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Umm, I-I thought we were moving forward and now youre-youresending me all these mixed signals. What are you trying to tell me?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 Im trying to tell you I made you a mix tape.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 What?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Ross	 I love you!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Mona	 Ohh!  And I love spending time with you. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Hi honey Im home.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 From the tequila factory?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 It was awful. To get out of going to dinner with Doug I told him thatyou and I split up. So then he took me to all these strip clubs and sleazy bars, and thenwhen I wouldnt give him my wedding ring, he threw a soda can at a bird!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 Come here. I can breath through my mouth.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Yknow what the worse part was? I got to see what my life wouldbe like without you. It was like Its a Wonderful Life with lap dances. Pleasepromise that you will never leave me, that we will grow old together, and be with eachother for the rest of our lives.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Monica	 I promise. Hey, speaking of together, how about we send out a holidaycard this year?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Chandler	 Ooh, I dont know if were there yet.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Yes. Hi, Id like to order a pizza. Okay, can I ask you a question?Is-is the cute blond guy delivering tonight? Very Ambercrombie & Fitch.  Ill call you back.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Who was that?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Its just the pizza place.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 You hung up on the pizza place? I dont hang up on your friends.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Im sorry honey, Im just having a, having a rough day.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Oh, whats wrong?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Oh you really, you really just dont want to hear about it.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Then why did I ask?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Okay, its justand this is really embarrassingbutlately with this whole pregnancy thing Im just finding myselfhow do I put thisumm, erotically charged.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Is that college talk for horny?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Yeah. So yknow, I have all of these feelings and I dont knowwhat to do about them, because I cant date like a normal person, which is finebecause I dont need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night.Just sex, yknow? No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feelcomfortable with and who knows what hes doing. For just one great night, I mean isthat really sohardto find.  So how was your day?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Good, I uh, I saw a pretty big pigeon.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Well, I gotta get up early and its almost seven oclock.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Yeah, I gotta, I gotta go to my room too.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Okay, good night!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Good night. 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	  I cant do it!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	  I didnt ask you to do it!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Youre Rachel!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Youre Joey!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Youre my friend!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Right back at ya!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 But plus, it would be wrong and weird and-and-and bad.
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 And so bad. I dont even know what youre talking aboutbecause I didnt ask you to do anything!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 I know!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Do you wanna do it?
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 No!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 All right, me neither! I was just testing you!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Thats the end of this conversation!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 This conversation never happened!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Rachel	 Never happened! Good night!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Good night!
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Joey	 Get back in there! 
08	11	0811	The One With Ross's Step Forward	Phoebe	 Hi. Listen, Im sorry about that whole thing with Roger. It reallywasnt right, and I, and I want to make it up to you, so umm, I brought you somethingthat I think youll really enjoy.  Now, this is just a loan. Okay? Im gonna, Im gonnawant him back. So  Im gonna go now.   Im sorry, I thought I could do it and I cant! 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey! I got you a present!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Oh my goodness! Where did you hide it?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 I got it for your wedding and I ordered it weeks ago, and it finally gothere!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Pheebs you didnt have to get us anything for our wedding youalready sang
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	  I love it! Its huge!! Lets open it! Open it!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Its a Ms. Pac-Man machine!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Oh my God!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 I didnt know where to put it so I just left it here for now.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Oh well, maybe we can put it in the guest bedroom.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Oh, okay. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 All right. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 I kinda like it here.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Do you really like it?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Are you kidding?! I practically spent my entire childhood at the arcade!This is likeOh my, this is like my second favorite game!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh really? What was your first?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Well I-I really dont remember the name of it.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Well what did it do?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Well, you justyou put a quarter in and yknow pull-pull somehandles and win like a candy bar or something.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 A vending machine?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Dont feel bad for me! I won like every time!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Hey! Oh, Im so glad you guys are here. Ive been dying to tellsomeone what happened in the Paleontology department today.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	  Do you think he saw us or can we still sneak out?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Professor Neuman, the head of the department, so.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 They made you head of the department!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 No, I get to teach one of his advanced classes!  Why didnt Iget head of the department? 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh! Hey Rach, listen umm
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 I got a big date coming up, do you know a good restaurant?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Uh, Pauls Café. They got great food and its reallyromantic.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Ooh, great! Thanks!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah! Oh, and then afterwards you can take her to the Four Seasonsfor drinks. Or you go downtown and listen to some jazz. Or dancingOh! Take herdancing!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 You sure are naming a lot of ways to postpone sex, Ill tell ya
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Ooh, I miss dating. Gettin all dressed up and going to a fancyrestaurant. Im not gonna be able to do that for so long, and its so much fun!I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is notfun.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Hey, yknow what?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Huh?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Why dont I take you out?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 What?! Joey, you dont want to go on a date with a pregnant lady.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yes I do! And were gonna go out, were gonna have a good time,and take your mind off of childbirth and c-sections and-and giant baby heads stretchingout
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	  Okay! Ill go with ya! Ill go! Ill gowith ya.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Ill be fun.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 All right?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 No. No! Yes! Ahh. Oh, would you look at that Monica? I just knocked offall of your top scores, how sad.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Okay, Im next.  Dont!Dont start another game! I said Im next! Phoebe!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh, Im sorry. I didnt hear you over all the winning.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Chandler! Phoebes hogging the game!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Who cares? Its a stupid game.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 You only think its stupid because you suck at it.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 I dont suck. Its sucks. You suck.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Wait okay, if this game is gonna cause problems between the two of you,then maybe I should just keep it.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 No! No-no! I love it! It is a great present! In fact, why dont yougo home and wait for the thank you card?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Why do you want to play this game so bad?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah! Its not like it spits out a Clark bar after everygame.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Okay. Phoebe thats it. Come on, get outout of the chair. Getout!  OhcomePhoebe!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Joey? Could you get that?  What are you doing here? I thought you were in your room?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 No, Im picking you up for our date. These are for you. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Ohh, Lilies. Joey, theyre my favorite. Thank you.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 And, a brownie!  Well, half abrownie. Actually, its just bag. Its been a long walk from the flower shop andI was startin to feel faint so
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh man! This is so great! I actually feel like Im going on a realdate! Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and Im wearing underwear thatgoes up to aboutthere.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Hey come on now, this is a real date. Uh, sonice place you got here.Foosball, huh? Pizza box. Oh, a subscription to Playboy, my kind of woman.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, actually thats my roommates.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 I would like to meet him. He sounds like a stand up guy.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Ah yes, but hes very protective of me so youd better watchyourself.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Ah Hey, so this roommate of yoursis he good looking?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Hm-mmm.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh yeah, it must be tough to keep your hands of him, huh?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	  Yeah, but Im pretty sure hes gay.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 No-no-no-no, hes not! No! Why are you trying to ruin the game? Comeon!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 which brings us back, of course, to Greelys theory of dominance. Okay, that-thats all for today. Oh, uh does anyone know where theFreeman building is?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Student	 Yeah, its the new building on Avenue A.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 What?! That-thats all the way cross town, Im supposed to teacha graduate seminar there in ten minutes.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Student	 Ooh, dude. Thats not gonna happen.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Move it! Move it! Move it!! Hey!!! Im the teacher!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Hello.  Imsorry Im a little late. AhWhoa! A lot late. Let mestart by uh, by introducing myself, I am Professor Geller.  So to sum up,Im Professor Geller. Good job today.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Now the filet mignon, what comes with that?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Waitress	 Theres a side of steamed vegetables.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Emmm. Now, instead of the vegetables, is there anyway I can substitutethe three-pound lobster?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yknow what? Bring her both, and Ill have the same. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Wow! This is shaping up to be a pretty good dateOh, I almostforgot. I didnt pay you the rent check.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh whoa-whoa-whoa, no roommate stuff. Okay? Were on a date.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Okay. Wow! So I get to see what Joey Tribbiani is like on a date. So doyou have any moves?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 No! No. Umm, just myself and if they dont like me forIm sorry I couldnt even get through that.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 I knew it! I knew it. Come on tell me your moves.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh alright. Umm, well, okay, I usually start by having a bottle of winesent to my table from a fan.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh my God. And that works?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Well it does when you combine it with, "This is so embarrassing, Ijust want to have a normal life!"
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, you poor little famous man.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh okay, how about this one. I was gonna wait until the end of the nightto kiss you, but youre so beautifulI dont think I can.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	  Oh my God! Wow! That was fantastic, I almost leanedin. I really almost did!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Alright, soso tell me one of your moves.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Alright. So whered you grow up?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Thats your move? Boy Rach, youre lucky youre hot.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Come on, just answer the question!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	  Queens.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 And so were-were you close to your parents?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, with my mom. Yeah, not so much with my dad.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Why not?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 I dont know. I guess theres just always been this distanceyknowI mean we both try to pretend its not there, but it is.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	  Oh.  Itsgotta be rough.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, it is. Its really tough. Yknow sometimes IthinkWow!! Nice move!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Huh?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 "Whered you grow up," its so simple!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Thank you! And now if youll excuse me, I have to go to the restroom.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 And now youre watching me walk away.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yes I am! Again so simple!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Hey.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 You are not going to believe what I did today!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Well it clearly wasnt showering or shaving.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 I got good. I played this game all day and now I rule at it! Theyshould change the name of it to Ms. Chandler.  Although I-I hope they dont.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Wait a minute, you stayed home all day and played Ms. Pac-Manwhile I went off to work like some kind of chump?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Uh-huh, and I got all the top ten scores, I erased Phoebe off theboard! High five! 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 What is the matter with your hand?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Well Ive been playing it for like eight hours, itll loosenup. Come on, check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, theyre dirtywords.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Chandler, why would you do that?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Because its awesome.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 You think this is clever?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Well yknow, they only give you three letters, so after A-S-S itis a bit of a challenge.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Hey wait a minute, this one isnt dirty.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 It is when you put it together with that one.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Ah, well if you dont clear this off, you wont be getting oneof those from me. But Bens coming over here tomorrow to play this game, thiscant be there.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Come on, he wont even know what they mean.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Chandler! Hes seven; hes not stupid.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Have you talked to him lately?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 All right, look Im just gonna unplug it.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 No-no-no, if you unplug it, Ill have nothing to show for my day!It would be like I was at work.  No!  Hey look atthat! Look at that, its still there! This thing must have some kind of primitive ROM Chip in it or something!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Honey you-you got to beat your scores!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 With the claw?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 All right fine. Fine, Ill do it. Ive just got to get thisoff the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that you taught him pull my finger.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	  Pull my fingerMy hand ismessed up.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 I am not gonna answer that!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh come on! Just pick one! Between Monica, Phoebe, Chandler, and Ross ifyou had to, if you had to, who would you punch?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 No one! They are my friends, I wouldnt punch any of them.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Chandler?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, but I dont know why. Look at me, Im having such awonderful time!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Me too! Hey Rach, can I just say I think this is the best date I ever had!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 I know!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 I never laughed so hardDid you see the wine come out of my nose?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Joey, I think everyone saw the wine come out of your nose.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 I gotta say, I never knew I could enjoy the non-sex part of the date somuch.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Huh. Huh.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 All right, now dont judge me. I normally wait until my dateleaves, but you live here. Im ripping into this swan.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Ah! Okay, well then you dont judge me. Im gonna suck on thecellophane from the brownie I had before. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 So tell me, what are Joey Tribbianis end of the night moves?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Ah, well, if I want the girl to kiss me, first thing I do is make my lipslook irresistible. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 How do you do that?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Now you cant tell anyone, but uhI put on shiny lip balm.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh my God!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, like a moth to a flame, Im telling ya. Okay all right, so nowyou go.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 No, I dont want to tell you.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Why not?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Because its embarrassing.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 More embarrassing than shiny raspberry lip balm?!  I didnt say raspberry before did I? All right just-just tell me Rach, justtell me!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	  Okay. All right, stand up.  Well, when wereat the door, I lightly press my lips against his, and then move into his body just for asecond, and then I make this sound, "Hmmm." Okay, I know it doesnt soundlike anything, but I swear it works.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	  Yeah. WhyYeah, that would work for ya
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 All right, I gotta go to bed. Honey, I had such a wonderful time.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh.  Yeah.  Me to. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 you were 50 minutes late to the class, what did you crawl there?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 No, I ran. It was really far, and when did people stop understanding thephrase, "Get the hell out of my way!"
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Well, why didnt you just take a cab?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Ugh, between the traffic that time of day and all the one-way streetsitll take me twice as long. Besides, I teach the class three times a week, who am I?Rockefeller?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Well youre not gonna be able to keep doing this.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Well I have to. Okay? If I dont, theyll take the class awayfrom me. AndI already put it in my family newsletter.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 You what?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Youve seen it, the Geller Yeller.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Right. Wow!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Besides, I-I think I figured out a much faster route, Im sure I canmake it this time. I justI just cant be afraid to get a little bithit bycars. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Hey!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Hi! Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh yeah, I still cant believe you havent seen Cujo.What is wrong with you?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Relax! Its not like its Citizen Kane!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Have you ever tried to sit through Citizen Kane?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah I know its really boring, but its like a big deal.Anyway, I was thinking about renting Cujo sometime.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh yeah? All right, lets do it tonight.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Well dont you have that big date tonight?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh right!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Hey Joey, can I ask you something?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 After our date last night, did you feel a little weird?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh my God! You did too? It totally freaked me out, what was that?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 I dont know!  Im-Im kinda thinking it-it wasthe lobster
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh yeah-yeah, the lobster.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, I mean I was up sick all night.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah me too, all night.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Really?! How come we didnt cross paths?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah well thats because uhI stayed in my room. Yeah, youdont want to look in my hamper.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Okay, I got that. Ill escape over there. Ill come back overhere. All right, come on Ms. Pac-Man. Its gotRightWell, youre just a little bitch, arent you?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	  Hey, you guys. Listen, Im sorry that I was hogging thegame beforeOh my God! Your friends have someunfortunate initials!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Theyre all Chandler.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Chandler sucks! He couldnt have gotten this good!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 I did.  But it came at a price.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 But Ben is coming over tonight and he cant see this.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 Oh come on, by age seven kids have already seen orgies.  Was it just me?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Yeah!!!! Yes, I made it! Im on time!  Okay,why dont we all uh,  open our books to page 23. Where  Where you will seea uha bunch of uhred spots. Okay,  umm, why dont, why dont you all start to read, while I
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey'S Date	 Hey. Are you all right? You seem a little distracted.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 No-no! Im fine. Its just Hey, can I ask you something?Have you ever looked at someone that youve known for a while and thensuddenlysuddenly see them a different way?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey'S Date	 You mean like from behind?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Yeah. Yeah, thatthats exactly it. Youre right. Yeah.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey'S Date	 Ew, yknow what? One time I saw this guy from behind and heseemed like a totally normal guy and then he turned around and it was Stephan Baldwin!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	  Ooh! Yeah. So yeah, so you know exactly what Im talkingabout.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey'S Date	 Totally! Wow!  Would you excuse me for a sec?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh yeah, sure.  Ehhh.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Oh my God Phoebe, youre on fire!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 I know!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 One more score to go! You can do it! 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Dont touch me!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Monica	 Dont touch her!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Chandler	 All right! Go left! Go left! Go right!! Go right!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 I cant!! I cant!!  Noooooooo!!!!!!! You son of abitch!!!!! 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 Phoebe!!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh hi BenNo!! Dont look at the machine! 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh God! Thank God youre home! Im watching Cujo.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	  Alone?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yes! But what is wrong with this dog?!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Hey, did you get to the part where theyre trapped in the car andCujos throwin himself at the windshield?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 No! No! Seriously, whats wrong with the dog?! Wait a minute, whatare you doing home so early? What happened to your date?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh uh, it didnt work out.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh. Do you want to watch the rest of the movie with me?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh uh, okay. Yeah.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Yknow, I never thought Id say this about a movie, but Ireally hope this dog dies.  What are you doing over there? Come sit here, you protectme.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Oh sure, yeah, why not? 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Okay.  Okay, thats him! Thats him! ThatsCujo! Thats Cujo!
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 All right, I know! I know. Yeah, itll be okay.
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Rachel	 Oh my God.Whats he gonna do now? I cant watch!  Oh. Seriously, how can you watch this?Arent you scared?
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Joey	 Terrified. 
08	12	0812	The One Where Joey Dates Rachel	Ross	 So is everybody here? I got here a little early myself. Let us begin. Now,the hydrosaurids have been unearthed in two main locations.  Here.  Here.  Now as for the hydrosaurs 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  All right. Its a new day. All that stuff aboutRachel, you dont feel that now. It was crazy! Youre fine.Youre better than fine! You are, as your friend Tony would say, Grrrreat!Everythings normal! Shes just your friend Rachel! Your friendRachel. Your friend! Rachel.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	  Hi, sweetie.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  Hey, its your girlfriend, Rachel!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	  Hi.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Are you, are you high?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I just had the most amazing bath.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Really? I dont like baths.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Wait, you like them with me.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Honey, its not the bath I enjoy, its the wet, naked lady.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Oh, baths are so relaxing!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Really? What do you do? You just sit in there stewing in your own filth.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 How dirty do you think I am? Im telling you, if you had some candlesand some bubbles and some music, you would love it! It would take all of your stress away.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Honey, its 2:00 on a Wednesday and Im watching Road Rules,how stressed do you think I am?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  Hey, Chandler, you got a minute? I-I really need to talk to you.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh! Uh, yeah! Is this a cold pizza talk or a leftover meatloaf talk?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Well, neither.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh my God, whats up?!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 I dont know. Its-its justlately, Ive beenfeeling Okay, heres what it is  You know what? I feel a lotbetter, thanks! 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh no-no, no you dont, just come back.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 All right. Okay. You and Monica, friends for a long time, and sure there arerules, but then you went to London. Oh, no, but thats different. I mean, there arerules there, too! You know what I mean?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Do you?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 It was different for you guys! I mean, I mean, you were both in the sameplace, right?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 In London?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Yeah.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Yes. When Monica and I were in London, we were both in London.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 You know what? This is a bad idea. Forget it. Forget it, and listen, do me afavor, this conversation was between you and me.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 If that.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Hi! Oh, Ross, dont forget, we have that doctors appointmenttomorrow!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Right.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Hey, are you going to find out the sex of the baby?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 No-no, we talked about it. We dont want to know. All we care about isthat its happy and healthy.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Yep! Happy and healthy! And cute!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 And smart!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Popular.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 With an aptitude for science.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Are you two talking about the same baby? Hey! Have you started off thinkingof names yet?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Ive come up with a bunch of ideas!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Really? Me too!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Me too!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Really?!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Uh huh! If its a girl, Phoebe, and if its a boy, Phoebo!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Maybe. But it wouldnt hurt to have a backup, you know? Uh, Rach-Rach,what were you thinking? 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Okay! I was thinking if its a girl, how about Sandrine? ItsFrench.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Huh. Thats a really pretty name for-for an industrial solvent.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Okay fine, what do you have?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Well, OK, its for a boy. Well, I know its a little out there,butDarwin.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Wow, oh my God, our child will be beaten to death in the schoolyard.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Yeah, by Sandrine.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Youre just saying that 'cause I said no to your name!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Im really, really not.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 How-how about you each get five vetoes?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 All right.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 All right.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 That sounds fair.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Yeah! I dont think youre going to need it though. Okay, checkthis out. If its a girl, Rain.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Veto.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Why?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Rain? Hi. Hi, my name is Rain. I have my own kiln, and my dress is made outof wheat.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 I know her! I bought homemade soap from her at a Dead show!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Okay, how about, for a guy, Thatcher?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Ross, why do you hate our child?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Fine, you go.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Okay, James.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Huh.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 But only if its a girl.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Oh, veto. How aboutOoh, I like Ruth! What about Ruth?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Oh! Im sorry! Are we having an 89-year-old? How about Dayton?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Veto. Stewart?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Veto. Sawyer?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Veto. Helen?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Veto.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Is it me, or is veto starting to sound really good?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Hey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Boy, do I have a surprise for you!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Sex on the balcony?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 No, but someones really not going to get over that idea, are they?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 What is it?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I drew you a bath!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Honey, I dont like baths! Could you draw me a picture of us havingsex on the balcony?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Please, could you just try it for me? Come on, I used all my best stuff!I-I-I lit some candles. I put on some music. I used bath salts, plus bubble bath! And gotyou this little plastic Navy ship. So its a boy bath!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Well, this does butch it up a bit.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I swear, if you try it, you will love it!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 All right, if I do this, can we at least discuss sex on the balcony?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Absolutely.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Bet I know how that discussions going to go.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	  All right, this isnt so bad. I like the flowersmell! Which is okay, because Ive got my boat.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	  So?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh my God.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I told you you were a bath person! Hey, when you get out, maybe I can give youa facial!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Im going to need a bigger boat.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 I dont think you had an open mind about the name Ruth. I mean, come on,little Ruthie Geller, how-how cute is that?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Oh, oh my God! I can practically hear the mahjong tiles!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Dr. Long	 Okay! All your tests look fine. Now, are you two interested in knowingthe sex of the baby?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Uh, no. No, were not.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 But you have it right there in that file? You could tell us whetherits a boy or a girl? Dayton or Sandrine? Phoebe or Phoebo?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Dr. Long	 Thats right. But if you dont want to know
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 No, no, we want to wait, right?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Right. Right.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Dr. Long	  Oh, Ill be right back. And, uh, I knowits really not my place, but please dont name your child Phoebo.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	  So, which of thesebabies do you think is the ugliest?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 What? Rach! Come on, thats terrible!Theyreuhtheyre babies. Theyre-theyre all beautiful.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Third one from the left?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Yeah, why is it staring at me? I think it knows Im talking about it. Dont-dont youWhWhaHey!! 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 What?! 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Youre looking!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 I didnt!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 I saw you!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Okay fine, I did. But I didnt see anything, I swear.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Shame on you! Ugly baby judges you!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Okay, but Ross just listen to me
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 No, no, no, no! Dont tell me! I dont want to know!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 But I couldnt even if I wanted to, because I dont know! Iswear; I didnt see anything, and I dont want to know! It was just a momentarylapse.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Momentary lapse. Dont-dont you have any self-control?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	  Okay, a couple months late on the lecture, Ross.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Hello?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Im in the bathroom, can you come in here? I think theressomething wrong.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 You know what? I-I think Ill wait out here. 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Im in the bathtub.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Oh.  Whats wrong?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 I drew my own bath, but I did it wrong! The waters tepid. The saltdidnt dissolve and is now lodged places. And the scents I used dontcompliment each other. Eucalyptus and chamomileOh!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 What?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 The bath salts! Theyre starting to effervesce! Its different. Its interesting.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Okay, lets talk about something else.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Yeah! Sure, sure. So, what was going on with you today? Oh-oh-oh!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Well, I actually had the weirdest conversation with Joey. He was talkingabout rules and right and wrong and
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 I had the exact same conversation.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 You did? What was he talking about?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 I dont know! Joey hasnt had this much trouble getting outwords since we saw him in Macbeth!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	  That was a long night.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 All right, lets break this down. What exactly did he say to you?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Okay, he was talking about rules.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Uh-huh.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Umm, and looking at people differently.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 He didnt say anything about that to me.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 What did he tell you?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 He was asking all these questions about you, me, and London. And, ofcourse the glue that holds this all together, the rules.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Okay. So you, me and London. Looking at people differently. Maybe he wantsto do what you and I did in London with someone.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 But what did he mean by rules?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Wait a minute! He stopped talking the minute Phoebe came in!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Because he was looking at her differently.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 And Phoebe is his friend, so he thinks that would be breaking the rules!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 My God! He wants to do it with Phoebe in London!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	  You guys?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Just a minute!  Thats Mrs. Tribbiani!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 You dont say anything.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Why would I say anything? That two of our best friends could start thegreatest love affair of their lives! And they would have me to thank, and we could allstart having babies?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Im not going to let you say anything.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 You just stay here! 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh, God!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Oh, hey, Monica, I brought back your iron.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Oh, you had that? 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I thought I lost it. I got a new one, like, a month ago.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Oh, just as well, I broke this one.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 What?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Nothing.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I mean, I-I, I really shouldnt say. I mean, Im really notsupposed to.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Fine.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Its a humdinger!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Then its really too bad that you cant tell me.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Somebody likes you!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	  Is it Chandler?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 No!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Well, then tell him to stop staring!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Its Joey!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Really?! Joey?! You dont say.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Is it something youd be interested in?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 I dont know, I dont know, I dont know. You know, I mean,on the one hand, Mother may I? But yknow on the other hand No. No, Icant. Were friends. No, oh, no. I dont want to risk what we have.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I guess that makes sense. So, you think youre going to talk to him?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Sure, yeah. I mean, its Joey. I dont want him to get hurt.Well, I must say, I am on fire! First Chandler, now Joey!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Not Chandler, just Joey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Sure.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Hey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Hey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 You know what? Ive been thinking about it. Im really comingaround on the name Ruth. I think I would actually consider naming our child that.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Rach, I-I cant tell you how-how much that means to me! Ohh Wait aminute. Wait a minute. You-you hated the name Ruth! Why-why would you change your mind?Unless, you know were never going to have to use it. You did see the folder. Youknow its a boy!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 I didnt see anything! I actually changed my mind about the name.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 I dont think so! Youre just giving me Ruth so youll get toname it when its a boy, and thats when youll swoop in and name him Heathor Blaine or Sequoia.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 I wouldSequoia?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Veto.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Fine.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Unless  You anticipated that I would figure allthis out and you know that it actually is a girl, and you really do want her to be namedRuth! Well, Im not falling for that! Okay? Ruth is off the table!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 But Ross, you want the name Ruth!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Not like this!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Hey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Hey. Well, whats up?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Umm, Joey, I know.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 What?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 I knooow.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Whaaat?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 I know about your feelings.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Oh my God. You do?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Yes, and Im sorry. I-I know things worked out for Chandler andMonica, but thats very rare.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 I know. I know. And this is so much more complicated than it was for thoseguys. I mean, its Rachel for God sakes.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 For God sakes, its Rachel!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 I know. I know. And shes not only my friend; shes my pregnantfriend! Shes my pregnant friend whos Ross ex!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Yeah thats Rachel.  Beat me over the head with it.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 What am I going to do? You know, and I keep, I keep trying to get rid ofthese feelings, yknow? I stayed up all last night and made a list of everything Idont like about her. You want to hear it?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Yeah.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 She made me switch to light Mayo. Thats it! Thats all I got! And,you know what? It tastes the same and my pants fit better!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Joey, I just think youre getting worked up over nothing. This isprobably just a crush.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 You think?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Absolutely! Yknow, you get this rush of feelings, but then it goesaway.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Yeah, just a crush! Thats all this is! Its a crush! ImJoey; I dont get deep feelings.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Thats right, there you go! Crushes happen all the time! I knowIve had them for all you guys. Well, except for Ross and Chandler. And Im sureyouve had them for us.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Not really.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Mm-hmm.  Throw me a bone here.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 So, I uh I called the doctor and now we both know the sex of the baby.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 What?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Thats right. The student has become the master.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Ross, I swear, I dont know.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Oh, come on, you know its a girl!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 A what?!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 You really didnt know?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Were having a girl?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 No.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Thats what you just said!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 No.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 You said girl!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Yes. Im Im sorry. Im so sorry.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Im not! Were having a girl! Sometimes I cant believeits with youBut still! Were having a girl!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 I know! I know. You know what? Im putting Ruth back on the table!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Oh, yes! Well have ourselves a little baby Ruth
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	 Permission to veto.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Yes, please.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Hey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Do I smell essential oils?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Yeah, Im going to take a bath. Im just going to get a magazine.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Okay.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 What do you think youre doing?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 L-leaving my troubles behind?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 I know that youre new at this, but this is completely unacceptablebath decorum.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh, its so hard to care when youre this relaxed.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Fine, you can have the bath, but I am taking your boat. Now yourejust a girl in a tub!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	  Hey!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Hi, Bubbles. Manly. Well, I just thought I would drop by and let you knowhow it went with Joey.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	  You told her?!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 She pulled it out of me! Shes like a conversational wizard!Howd it go?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Well, you were wrong, he doesnt like me!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 What?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Yeah! How would you like it if I sent you to Lee Majors house andtold you that he liked you, and you went down there and you found out that he didntlike you? How would you feel?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	  I dont think Id care.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Really? Lee Majors is hot!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  Hello?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Were in the bathroom!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Why?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	  Because its a relaxing and enjoyable time!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  What are you guys doing in here?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Oh my God! A friend hes looking at differently, but its wrong.Its Rachel!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 You like Rachel?!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	 Its no big deal, okay? Phoebe and I talked about it. Its just acrush! Its going to go away!  Dude, you gotta rearrange your bubbles!Oh!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	   Mazel tov.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	  Hey! Ross and I were looking for you! What are we all doing inhere?  Oh, my! 
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Honey, cover it up with the boat!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	  Hello?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	  Yes were all in here and we would love for you tojoin us!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Ross	  Well hey! Whats going on? Ooh, cool boatOh, no.  Hey, did you, did you tell them?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 No, I was waiting for you!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Phoebe	 Tell us what?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	 Were having a girl.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	All	 Oh, wow! Yay! Wow! Hooray! Oh, man!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 IllIll get you later!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  All right. Its a new day, and its just acrush, thats all! Just a little crush! All that worrying I was doing,that was crazy. Crazy! Like my friend here the bird would say, "itwas cuckoo!" Everythings going to be fine. Its just a crush.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Rachel	  Hi, sweetie.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Joey	  I love you.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 It sure is nice to do this together, isnt it?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Yeah. And what youre doing feels so good.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Im not touching you.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Youre not?
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	 Its the salts.
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Chandler	 Oh, sweet Lord. New realms of pleasure!
08	13	0813	The One Where Chandler Takes A Bath	Monica	  Whatever keeps you off the balcony, big guy!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	  Hey,whats up?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Well, I left my guitar here again.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh, okay. No problem.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Okay. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Okay.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Here you go.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Okay. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Okay.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Great! Umm
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 What?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 So do you want to hang out or something?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Phoebe! You kinda caught me at a bad time.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Oh are you and Chandler
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Yes! Exactly.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Okay. Do you guys want me to play for you?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	  No. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Hey Pheebs, whats up?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 You ask an intriguing question Chandler Bing.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Youre getting a massage! You never let me massage you!!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Phoebe, I can explain!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 You told me you hate massages!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Buy stamps, pick up dry cleaningDont let Phoebe in.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 I cant believe this! How long as this been going on?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Well umm, Alexandra has been
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Oh, it has a name?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Phoebe, dont get upset!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 OkayOop! Too late! Im leaving! Come on Chandler letsgo! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Well, Phoebe I thought IdYeah, what the hell. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh okay, okay! One more push! One more push! Come on honey, werealmost there! Were almost there!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Oh Joey, Im so happy things worked out for us that werehaving this baby together. I love you so much.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh, I love you too.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 And I hope its not an inappropriate time to say this but,youre the best sex I ever had.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Thats always appropriate!  Oh, okay. Onemore push! One more push!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Doctor	 Oh, here is your beautiful baby. Congratulations! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	  I hope youre a better father than youre a friend!!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	  Joey! Joey!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 What? Whats going on?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Come feel this! Come feel my belly!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Aaaah
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Joey! The baby is kicking for the first time! Will you please come feelthis?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Really?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yes!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh, yknow what? Maybe uh, youyou should come to me. Im anot, Im not wearing any bottoms.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Oh, okay! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh my, oh my God!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Aw, its unbelievable! Wow! She is kicking so much! Oh, sheslike ummohwhos that kind of annoying girl soccer player?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Mia Hamm?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Mia Hamm!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh thats amazing. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	  Oh-oh!! One hand on the sheet Joe!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Whoa-hey-oh! Sorry!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Hey babe.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Hi honey. We just got a wedding gift from Bob and Faye Bing; theydont like us do they? 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Who says you cant get a nice punch bowl for under six bucks?Maybe we can take it back?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 No, it doesnt say where it came from. Where would we return it?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 How about to the street say from the balcony?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Why dont we just find a place for it?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Okay. How about in that cabinet?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 No! Thats where we keep the canned goods! Have you completelyforgotten everything you learned at orientation?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 How about the closet by the bathroom? 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh, okay. Here, why dont you let me do it?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Oh no-no-no, I will do it. Honey, you have to learn to sit down andrelax and let your husband take care of things once and awhile. Its locked, you have to help me. Why is it locked?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 No reason. I-I keep private things in there.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Oh yknow, Ive been living here a while and Ive neverseen whats inside that closet. What is, what is in there?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Feminine stuff.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Dont try to make me uncomfortable with feminine stuff!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Chandler, there is nothing in there that concerns you! If you love meyou-youll let it go.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Fine.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Thank you! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	  Love you.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	  Hello Chandler, lovely day huh?  You!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Phoebe if it helps Alexandra has only been massaging Monica for likethree years.  If! I said,"If it helps!" 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Why wont you let me massage you?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Well itsI mean Id justId beself-conscious. Youre my friend; Id be naked.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Monica! We lived together for years! Ive seen you naked!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Thats different, we were roommates! And when?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Im curious about the human body.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Hey, come on Phoebe, you can understand why this would be weird for me.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 But Im a professional! And Im really good! Look, ifyoure uncomfortable we can stop. Just give me a chance, okay. Please?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Okay, if it means that much to you
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 It does! How would you feel if you couldnt share your cooking?Or-or imagine how Ross would feel if he couldnt teach us about dragons.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Dinosaurs.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Potato, potaato. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Hey!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Hey Ross! The babys kicking!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 What?! It is?! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Its not kicking right now. Although we would love to see you do that again.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Hey, when-when was it kicking? What happened?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Last night! I just felt it and I went into Joeys room and he wassleeping
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 A dreamless sleep.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 My God, the babys kicking. Thats great. Although Ikindawish I-I wouldve been there to feel the kicking for the first time yknow.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Well I got stuff going on in here  if you wanna feel.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Look, I-I dont want to miss anymore baby stuff. SoHere.Heres my new pager number, okay? Anytime anything pregnancy related happens use it!Ill be there! Okay? I dont care if its three in the morning and all youwant is ice cream.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Wow! Can I get a copy of that?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	  Are you under the sheet?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Yes. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	  Great, lets begin. Hows the pressure?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Nice! Wow Phoebe you are good!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Stating the obvious, but thank you. And its not weird is it.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 No. Ooohh
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Thats right, you just enjoy.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	  Oh. Oh yeah! Ohhhhh! Ohh! Oh yeah! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	  Okay.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh God Phoebe!!  Oh thats it! Thatsit! Right there! Oh!  Ooooh-oooh-ooooh 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 I wasnt trying to open your closet! I wasnt trying to openyour closet! I swear! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Whoa, Monica runs a pretty tight ship over here. What are you doing?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Monica has a secret closet and she wont let me see whatsin it.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Why not?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 I dont know! What could she possibly be hiding in here that Icant see?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 I dont know. Ooh, I bet its Richard.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Why would Monica be keeping Richard in here?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Well off the top of my head uhh, maybe shes having her cake andeating it too. You being the cake and Richard being the too. Or!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 And here we go
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 I saw this movie once where there was a door and no one knew what wasbehind it, and when they finally got it open millions and millions and millions of bugscame pouring out and they feasted on human flesh. Yknow it wouldnt kill ya torespect your wifes privacy!  Stupid closet full of bugs!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Joey. Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. IdontWhoa!! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh hey whoa-whoa, dont worry. Okay. When my sisters were pregnantthey got every weird feeling in the book, it was always nothing.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Really?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Absolutely. But, were gonna stop by the hospital just to besure, okay? Ill page Ross on the way. Come on.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Okay. Oh GodOw!Oo!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Okay Rach-Rach-Rach look at me, look at me, everythings gonna befine, trust me. Okay. Take my hand. Here we go.  Oww crushingbones!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Hey! So?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Dr. Long	 Shes fine. Shes experiencing Braxton-Hicks contractions,mild discomfort caused by contractions in the uterine wall.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Hmm, mild discomfort. So I take it youve had one of these Braxtonthingies?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 So but everything is normal.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Dr. Long	 Absolutely.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 And-and theres no danger to her and the baby?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Dr. Long	 No-no. Contractions can be unnerving if you dont know what theyare, but shes fine.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Thank you doctor.   Oh thank you for being sonice and calm.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Calm?! I wasnt calm! Ive never been more scared in all mylife!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 But wait you said everything was gonna be okay.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Well what do I know?! Im not a doctor!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 But IBut everything is okay. Im fine!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 You sure?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yes! Yes! I got half a mind to contract that doctors uterusthough. Mild discomfort, whats he talking about?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	  Oh hey-hey!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	  Is everything okay?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yeah, everythings fine!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Your page said come to the hospital, what? What was it? What happened?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Something called Braxton-Hicks contractions.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Oh. Oh. Thank God, most women dont even feel them.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Hey uh, whats with the candy?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Oh when you beeped me I was on line at the concession stand at the movietheater.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Oh you went to the movies by yourself?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 No IMona!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Oh, I gotta go back in there.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 What? Why? Whats wrong?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 No, everythings fine. I just gotta go back
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 No really, you tell me whats up.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 I-I forgot my underwear. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	  So, thanks so much for bringing her to the hospital.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh hey, dont worry about it man. Dont worry about it, no bigdeal.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Yeah but still, I mean it shouldve been me. Im the dad.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Dr. Long	  Uh, if you have any questions, heres some informationon Braxton-Hicks.  Oh and by the way, you did the right thing bybringing her in. Youre gonna make a wonderful father.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh uh, hey. Not as good as this guy!  Hebrought Twizlers!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 There has got to be a way!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Easy there Captain Kirk. Oh, do you have a bobby pin?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Yeah.  Oh no wait, Im not an nine-year-oldgirl.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Then why do you throw like one?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Maybe Monica has a bobby pin.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Sure. "Monica."
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 So, hows the hideously inappropriate crush on Rachel coming?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Uh, really good. Really good. Yeah, I should be ready to kill myself anyday now.  Wow, you sure foundthat quick.  I justI wish I didnt feel this wayabout Rachel anymore, yknow? I wish things could go back to normal. I mean, I loveliving with her and God, helping out with the baby is just amazing, but now I thinkIthink Ross feels left out. Yknow? When I had to take Rachel to the hospital, thedoctor thought I was the father. God You shouldve seen the look on Rosssface.  By the way, I have no idea what Im doing here. For all I know Imjust locking it more. Oh hey, did you try opening it with a credit card?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Thats a good idea.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Yeah.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Okay.  So uh,Ross is kinda bummed huh?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh, I justI feel terrible.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Well, its not your fault. What are you gonna do? Not take her tothe hospital? Yknow? Youre doing nothing wrong.  Except for harboringan all consuming love for the woman whose carrying his baby.  Richard? If-if youre in there, could you pass me my credit card?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Hey.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Hey.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 I gotta tell you, yesterday was amazing. That massage felt so good!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 No-no, I got that.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 So umm, what do you say we make it a weekly appointment?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Okay. Okay but you should know though, Ive raised my rates to $200an hour.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Okay.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 I mean $500.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 What?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 600.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Whats going on?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Oh, you make sex noises when you get massaged!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 What? 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Yeah, and it really freaked me out! And after a while I even tried tohurt you and it just spurred you on.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 What?! Youre crazy! Theres nothing sexual about the noises Imake!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Really? Theres nothing sexual about this?  Oooh. Oo God!Ohh. Ohhhh. Ohh.   What are you looking at?! I mean hi.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh myThis is so embarrassing. Oh my God, Im never gonna getmassaged again!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 No, you cant let this stop you from getting massages! No look, Ihave, I have lots of clients that make the same noises you do!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Really?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Well not clients, lovers. But lets just yknow, try it again.Come back and-and well work through it.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Are you sure?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Yes.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 I guess.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Great! Okay, if youll just excuse me.  So, did youhear something you liked?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Hey Ross! Check it out! I learned a new trick!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Hey uh, I brought you some lunch.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Ohh! Thats so sweet of you! Oh yum!  Did you put pickles on this?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Well yeah!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Oh Ross!! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 What?! What?! Rach what?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Whats going on?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 I made her favorite, tuna salad with pickles.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Pickle? Pickles make her sick. Giving her pickles is like giving me salad.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	  I-Im sorry Rach, I didnt know. Are you gonna beokay?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yeah, Ill be fine. But could someone please make sure thatsandwich is gone when I get out there?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Im on it! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 I cant believe this! I shouldnt be the one making her throwup!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Dude relax! It could happen to anyone.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Yeah? Not to you, because you know this stuff. I dont know any of itand Im the father. I wish Id be more involved yknow.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	  Well, if anyone is keeping score, I no longer eat tuna.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Hey uh, can I, can I talk to you guys for a second?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Yeah.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Whats up?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Uh, sit down. I wanna talk about our situation.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	  Are you breaking up with us?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 The thing iscause I live with Rachel Im here for a lotof the stuff, okay?  And RossRoss is missing everything. So
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yeah?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Maybe you two should live together.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Are you asking me to move out? Do you not want me here?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Oh no-no, no-no I love living with you. It just seems thatifyoure gonna have a roommate, yknow it might as well be the father.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 But Joey, I dont think Ross wants me to move into his apartmentand disrupt his life like that. I meanOrhe does.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 No I-I-I would love to be around for you and the baby. And we-we can justtry it like on a temporary basis.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 But Ross, its you and me!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 So? Sure! But it-it wouldnt be anything romantic. AndIm-Im dating MonaDamnit Mona! I was supposed to meet her like an hourago! What is wrong with me?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 All right now, so? What do you think?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 I dont know. Is it crazy?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 No! No its not. Joey, this is a smart idea.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Well, I was due.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Okay, lets do it. Ill move in.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Really?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Ross	 Oh Rach thats great. Thats great. 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Not to shabby, I got this all off myselfusing my wifestools.  Oh my God!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	   How did you get in there?!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	  Youre messy.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh no! You werent supposed to see this!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 I married Fred Sanford!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 No Chandler, you dont understand!  Okay! Okay! Okay!Fine! Now you know. Okay? Im yknowIm sick.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 No, honey youre not sick! Look, I dont love you becauseyoure organized, I love you in spite of that.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Really? You promise you wont tell anyone?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Yes! And look, now that I know if I got some extra stuff lying aroundcan we, can we share the closet.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Wellits just ummIm afraid you might mess it up.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Hey.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Hey.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 So Rachels all moved out huh? How are you taking it?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Well uh, I wanted to have a few beers, but uh, I got rid of those becauseRachel couldnt stand the smell of them. But I have thrown back a lot of orange juicewith calcium though. And uh, its a couple weeks past its expiration date, soits got a bit of a kick.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Chandler	 Are you okay?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Joey	 Are you kidding me? Im great! Yeah, Im uh; Im betterthan great. I am good. And now that shes gone, I can uh, I can do all this stuffaround here that I couldnt do before. Yknow? Like umm, I can walk around nakedagain. Yknow? I can uh, I can watch porn in the living room. Right? This is uh, thisis good for me. Yknow? I like being on my own, Im uh, better off this way.Im uh, a lone wolf. Yknow? A loner. Alone. All alone. Forever. Whats awolf got to do to get a huh around here?! 
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Ohhh.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Thats it. Just relax.
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Ohh. Oh! Ohh!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Come on more!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh God!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Yeah, you like that dont you?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Oh yeah right there!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 You want it there? You take it there baby!
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Monica	 Uh Phoebe?
08	14	0814	The One With The Secret Closet	Phoebe	 Yeah, say my name. Say it!  And now Im going to cover you back up, and umm were never doing thisagain.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Oh! Hey, Rach!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Hi! Hey, Happy Valentines Day!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Oh, you, too.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hey, so, uh, hows it going living over at Ross?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Its good. Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel allday long. Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in theMiddle Ages?  Oh, thank you. Ill seeyou guys later.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Bye.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Theres one lucky to-go cup of coffee.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	  Honey, I wish you would get over her. I hate seeing you like this.Is there anything I can do for you? Do you want to look down my top?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Thanks. But maybe later.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Oh, Gunther, can I get a scone?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Gunther	  You want anything?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 You know what I want? I want a lot of things! I want to be with the woman Ilove on Valentines Day! And I want her to love me back! And I want just one momentof relief from the gut-wrenching pain of knowing that thats never going to happen!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Gunther	 We have red bagels.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, okay. 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 So, how does Mona feel about you and Rachel living together?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Oh, Im actually on my way to tell her right now. Yeah, shes beenaway all week visiting her parents, but shell be cool. I mean, shes been sosupportive. She-she even got the baby a tiny T-shirt that says, Fossils are myfriends.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Ugh. Come on, Mona, dont kiss ass.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Uh, Im going to take off.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 All right. Oh! Shoot! Oh shoot! Uh, Rachel wanted to see this tape!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 What is it?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Its a video of my friend giving birth. Could you just bring it backto your apartment?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 All right.  Candy and Cookie?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Yeah. Candys the mother, Cookies the daughter. Thefathers also Cookie. Why am I friends with these people?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	  Phoebe, cmere. I want toshow you something in the bathroom.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Oh, Monica, grow up!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Hey, whats behind your back?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Nothing. Just something I want to get Phoebes opinion on forValentines Day.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 You dont want my opinion?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Not really.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Come on, Im your older brother, ask me!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 All right, big brother.  Which of these do you think would make your little sister look hotter, so yourbest friend would want to do her?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  The red one.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	  Hey. Look, I know youve been really depressedlately, so I brought someone over to cheer you up. Right outside this door is a real,live, furry playmate.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 No, Im not sleeping with your friend Jane again.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 He-hee!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hey! A dog! Hi! Who, you got to admit, looks a lot like Jane.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 This is the happiest dog in the world. I borrowed him from my friend Wendy.Now, you can only keep him until he cheers you up. And he will cheer you up!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Thanks so much, Pheebs!  We are going to have so much fun, yes weare!  Oh! Not that kind of fun.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Happy Valentines!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	  Okay! Ill be right out. Im slipping intosomething a little less comfortable, and a little more slutty.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	  Candy and Cookie.Candy and Cookie? Monica got me porn?! Girl-on-girl porn?! She really mustlove me!! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Man On Tv	 Yeah, just relax.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 I love you, St. Valentine.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Woah, woah, thats not pretty!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Man On Tv	 Now, push!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Woman On Tv	 Ow! Ow! Ooh! That hurts!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Worst porn ever! Worst porn ever! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Woman On Tv	 Ohhh! Make it stop!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 I am trying!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Get the ball, ready? Get the ball, get the ball!  Well, youre cute, butyoure not too smart! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	  Did I just throw this?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Hi.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hi.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 I accidentally packed these with my stuff.  Whois this?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, thats, uh, thats Phoebes friends dog. Idont know what his real name is, but I call him Mozzarella.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Oh, well, you are so cute! I wish I could play with you more, but Ive got to go towork! I hope I stop talking like this before my marketing meeting, yes I do. Yes I do. Bye-bye, Joey. Oh, I seriously cant stop it. 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	  Cmere. Hey. Cmere. Thats Rachel. Shesthe one who used to live here. Might as well be honest with youwe love her. But wecant have her. I really miss her. Well, hey, you understand, right? Youre aguy.  Well, you used to be.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	  So what do you think? 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	  Ive still got it!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	  Why did you get me this?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 What is it?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Its yellingbleedingdilating. Oh, the dilating
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Is this the video of the baby being born? Sweetie, this is Phoebes.Why were you even watching it?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 I thoughtmaybeyou got me porn for Valentines Day.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Chandler, if you thought I was going to get you porn for ValentinesDay  you were right! Apparently, its about ayoung girl who moves to the big city, you know, in search of stardom, but ends up havingsex with a lot of guys! Yeah, it got four starts!  Oh, wait a minute. Thosearent stars. Anyway, you want to take a look?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Well, Im not really in a sexy mood right now.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Honey, whats going on?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Well, remember the first time we saw Jaws?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Mm-hmm.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 How long it took to go back in the water?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Chandler, we cant let this tape wreck Valentines Day!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 You dont know. You didnt see it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Child-birth, its a natural thing! Its beautiful.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Oh, beautiful? Really? Beautiful? You think this is beautiful? 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Oh! Oh, my God! No wonder my mother hates me!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 See, honey, theres
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Dont touch me!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Hi!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Hey!  So, how was Atlantic City?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Good.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Yeah?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 I brought you back a present.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Wha? Oh, come on. You didnt have tosaltwater taffy?!  Thanks! This is interesting. You know, most people think this is made with seawater, but its actually made with, uh, salted fresh water. Thats notinteresting.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 I think its interesting.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I do too! I missed you!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 I missed you, too! So, how was your week?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Oh, it was good! It was good. Actually, the baby started kicking!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 How exciting!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Yeah! I know! It was. Oh the only sad thing is I wasnt aroundwhen it happened for the first time.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Oh no.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Yeah, Im missing out on all this other stuff, too. So, Joey suggestedRachel move in with me.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	  Yeah right!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 What?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Joey cracks me up! Its like, Yeah, why dont you have yourex-wife move in with you? That wouldnt be awkward at all! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  Huhuh-huh.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Huh, could you imagine. I go away for a few days, and come back, and myboyfriend is living with some woman he got pregnant! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 So, whatd you tell him?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  Just a second! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 How could you not tell Mona that Rachel is living with you?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I dont know, she seemed to think it was such a crazy idea! Um, plus,she, uh, she got me taffy!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Taffy, really? Ive never had any.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Ever?!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Well, I think my mother was too busy planning her suicide to providesaltwater treats.  Thank you! So what, youre just never going totell her?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Oh, no, no, no, I will! I just want to butter her up, first! You know,Im going to take her to an amazing Valentines dinner. Do all this romanticstuff, and then, just when she thinks Im the best boyfriend in the world, thenIm going to tell her that my pregnant ex-girlfriend is living with me.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 If I havent said it before: shes a lucky, lucky lady! So, whereare you going towhat the mother of crap is up with this stuff?  Oh, God. Is it gum, is it food?Whats the deal?  Oh, its nice! May I try a pink one?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 So, between her and me being friends, and her history with Ross, it justisnt going to happen. It would be like you falling in love with a cat.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	  Hey!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hey.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Hey, buddy. Hows my favorite dog, huh? Hows my favorite dog? Youre subdued.  Did you give him a beer?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 No.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Will you excuse us, we need to talk for a moment.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Yeah, sure. Go ahead.  Oh, me, right!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Hes miserable! What happened to him?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Nothing. We just talked about stuff.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 What stuff?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Rachel stuff.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 OhJoey, you bummed him out! This was the happiest dog in the world,and he spends half a day with you, and look at him!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hes breathing!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Phoebe	 Okay, Im going to take him back to Wendys.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 No, no, no, no! Hes fine! Look, look, look! Heres your ball! Get your ball! Get your ball!  Get your ball! My God, what have I done to you, huh? I broke thedog! Pheebs, I broke the dog!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Well, Im, uh, going to pick up Mona. What have you got going tonight?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Oh, Ive got big Valentines plans! Ive got my Chinese foodon the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Yknow, its interesting! Most people think thats made withseawater, when in fact
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Ross, we actually watched the documentary together.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Ooh! My Chinese food! Let me get my cash! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  Mona? What arehi! Whatare you doing here? Im, um, supposed to pick you up!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Change of plans, I made you a special Valentines dinner! Surprise!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Ayyyayyyy!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Oh, hey, Mona!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Hi! Hi. Hi, Rachel!  Whats she doing here?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I have no idea!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Ill be watching TV if anybody needs me. 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Seriously, what is she doing?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Uhlately, she just likes hanging out here.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Why?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I think shes lonely.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Okay, but its Valentines Day!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I know.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Cant we just ask her to go?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 No, no. Shes way to emotional. And by emotional I mean crazy.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Im not here! Thats just my Chinese food!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Oh, my God! She has food delivered here?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Mm-hmm. Shesshes emotional, but, but ballsy.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 You know what Im going to do? Im going to get in my sweats, andeat this in bed! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 And you thought she was going to be in our way! So, why dont you, uh,open the champagne, and Ill be right back. Ive got a surprise for you.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 You got another ex-wife back there?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  Please start drinking! 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Im just going to grab the phone.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 Oh, Rachel! Wait! Hey, I hope you dont take this the wrong way, but,but, um what are you doing?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Oh, Im sorry! Do you need the phone?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Mona	 No, no. Listen, Ross is too nice to say anything, but this is his apartment,and, and, we gotta have some boundaries, so why dont you go back to your place andgive us some privacy?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  But, but, Mona, I live here.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	  Happy Valentines Day! Or something toremember me by.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 How long has it been this time?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 90 seconds.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Thats better. 90 seconds is a long time not to think aboutitexcept all I did was think about it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 You know, it haunts me? Up til now, the worst thing I ever saw, wasmy father doing tequila shots off the naked houseboy. After this, I would gladly make thatmy screensaver!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Okay, well, we have to get past this! Why dont we get rid of the tapeand pretend it never existed?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 I can do that.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Okay.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Okay. Now all weve got to do is get rid of this chair.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Oh, thank God!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Oh, I know!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Come in!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Hi! Im so sorry to barge in on your Valentines, butI had to get away from all the yelling. Mona is dumping Ross.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Oh, my God.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Poor Ross.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Oh, great. We have to watch him do yoga in his underwear, but for this hecloses the drapes!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Rach, you know that birthing tape you wanted to see? Its here.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Oh, and we should warn you, before you watch it: dont watch it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Why? You saw it? Is it scary?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Well, lets just say its ironic how footage of someone beingborn can make you want to kill yourself.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Well, now, wait. Now Im all freaked out. Come on, you guys will watchit with me.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 No, but I will leave a sweater that smells like me right next to you!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Cmon, seriously, you guys, youre not going to make me watchthis alone!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Shes rightof course not. Honey, get the tape.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	  Thisreminds me of a very specific part of the tape.  Okay, here we go.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Okay.  Ooh, my!  Woah! Why is that baby torturing that woman?!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Why have I seen this thing three times?!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Itsstill beautiful.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Uh! Its horrible!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 I know! I know, Im so sorry for you!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Oh, my God!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 Wait, you guys, look!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 What? Did her ass explode?!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 No, the babys out! Look, look!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 Oh, look at those little fingers and toes!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Chandler	 And look how happy the mom is now!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Monica	 OhRach!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	 Oh, screw you guys, you dont have to do it!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Hey, hey, man!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Hey, whats up?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 UhMona just dumped me.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, man, Im sorry. Why?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Well, with everything thats been going on lately, I haventexactly been the perfect boyfriend. You know, I, uh, I didnt tell her I got Rachelpregnant. I gave her a key to my apartment, and then had the locks changed! And then Ilied to her about Rachel moving in with me. In a way, I actually judge her for notbreaking up with me sooner, you know?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Still, that really sucks, man. Especially on Valentines Day.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Yeah. Wait a minute. What are you doing here? Joey Tribbiani without a dateon Valentines Day? Whats going on, huh? Girl trouble?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Sort of.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Really?!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 You dont have to seem so happy about it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Oh, sorry. Well, look, maybe I can help you with it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, II d
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Hey, whatever it is, I am sure it has happened to me. Yknow, actuallyonceonce I got dumped during sex.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Anyway, so, uh, so what is it?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Forget about it. Its no big deal.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Cmon! Joey! What is it?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Its nothing.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Hey, hey, its me. Why cant you tell me?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Okay, uhsit down.  Um theres this woman that Ilike. A lot. But, uhit cant happen.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Shes not a Tribbiani?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 No!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 I knew it. So, is she someone from work?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Yes.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Well, uh, does she like you?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Sometimes I think maybe she could. But it doesnt matter, because Icant do anything about it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Why not?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Well, its complicated. Shes with this other guy. For a long time.Someone from work, too. And I could never do that to the guy, because were reallygood friends.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he still in lovewith her?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 No. I dont think so.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Okay. Um is he a good guy?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Yeah, hes the best.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, I dont know.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep,I
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happento you, huh? You owe it to yourself.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Gunther	  Heres your warm milk.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Im going touhIm going to, um, put the bourbon in itat home.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Oh, yeah.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Ross	 Anyway seriously, uhjustjust talk to the guy, okay? Andtell me how it goes. 
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Joey	 Its Rachel.
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Youre going to have a baby, and you need to beprepared. Now, youre going to make yourself watch the whole thing. Just do it!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Woman On Tv	 I came to the big city to become a star! Ill doanything tomake that happen!
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Man On Tv	 Anything?
08	15	0815	The One With The Birthing Video	Rachel	  Hmmmaybe it starts with how she gets pregnant.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Lisa Kudrow	  Previously on Friends
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Theres this woman, that I like.  A lot.  Well, itscomplicated.  Shes with this other guy.  For a long time.  And Icould never do that to the guy, yknow?  Ccause were really goodfriends.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 So, uh, this guy, she used to go out with, is, uh is he a good guy?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, hes the best.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Then talk to him! He might be fine with it.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh, I dont know.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Joey, its worth finding out. I mean, if you really like her.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 I do! So much! I cant stop thinking about her! I cant sleep,I
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Okay, Joey, you know what? You have to go for it. How often does this happento you, huh? You owe it to yourself. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Its Rachel.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	  Did you umIm sorry, did you just sayits Rachel?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yes.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Um, youyou like Rachel?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yes. I like Rachel.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Rachel?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	  Yeah, okay but look, buy uhHey-hey, yknow,yknow who else I like? You! And it-it doesnt get said enough. I like you Ross.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 But R-R-Rachel-Rachel?! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, but its not a big deal.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Its not a big deal? Oh, Im sorry I justum, Iwhatabout all the stuff you-you just said? I mean how about, I likeyou-you cantstop thinking about her. Like how you cant sleep?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Im an actor, yknow? As-as a group, we tend to be overdramatic.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Rachel whos carrying my baby? Rachel?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Look no, I-I know its bad, and I know its wrong. Okay? But-butits not like anythings ever gonna happen. Yknow? These-these are justfeelings, theyre gonna go away.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Yknow what? I-I gotta go. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh come on Ross! Hey Ross-Ross dont
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	  I justyknowI-I just have oneRachel?! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Gunther	 Rachel?!!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh-oh! Okay, shes kicking!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Oh!  Shes growing inside you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Whoa!!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Oh! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Wow that was a big one.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 I think thats the youngest girl ever to reject me.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	  Oh hey you guys!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Oh hey!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Hi!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Hey listen let me ask you, do you believe in soul mates?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh yes I do. I do. I believe that there is one perfect person out therefor everyone. And do you know how you find him? You stop looking for him. Thats whyI stopped looking for Russell Crowe. Hell find me.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Uh-huh,  and you?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 No. I mean I believe that uh, certain people are more suited for eachother and I believe in falling in love, but soul mates, I dont think they exist.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Okay, good.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Why?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Well last night, I met Monicas.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 What?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah, I had a date with this guy, and I swear to God, he is her otherhalf.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Come on, dont be crazy.  You dont thinktheres someone out there better suited for Monica than me, do ya? 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	  Well, whats he like?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Well hes tall.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 He has brown hair.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Of course, of course.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 A tall guy with hair similar to mine, oh unknowable universe!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 He works with food!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh sure. Older?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Obviously, and hes British.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, I was just gonna ask!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah? And, hes-hes so centered and mature and confident.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh, its so sad they never had a chance to meet.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Luckily, the guy she settled for cant hear what youretalking about.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh, Im so sorry. Um, and maybe Im wrong! Ibutyknow Im gonna go out with him again, Ill find out more.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 You believe that this guy is destined for someone else and yourestill gonna date him?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Well, he may not be my soul mate, but a girls gotta eat.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Hey.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Hey.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 I just talked to Joey, I justI want to see how you were.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Oh yknow, I stillI cant believe it. Joey and Rachel Imean its Its like you and me going out, only weirder!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 All right, I know youre hurting, and-and I want to be supportive,but dont say that again.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Oh my God! What if, what if they get married? Then hed be thestepfather of my child.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Honey, I dont think thats something we need to worry about!First of all hes-hes never gonna tell her how he feels about her. And even ifhe did you have no idea how shed react.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Sure, because women never like Joey. Yknow, I think hes avirgin.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Joeyhes not even thinking about going after Rachel!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Hes not?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 No! All hes thinking about is how youre taking this! I mean,listen its totally freaking him out. Hes talking about moving to Vermont.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Why?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 He says he wants to leave the country.  He thinks you hate him.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Hate him? I No, I dont hate him.  Its justits Rachel, yknow?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Honey I cant even imagine how hard this must be for you. But, Idont want you to lose Joey over it. And right now he just needs to know thatyoure still his friend.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Okay. Okay, Ill talk to him.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 All right. Now do it soon, he just asked me how to convert his dollarsinto Vermont money.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Oh! Hi!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Hi!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Umm, Chandler, Monica, this is Don.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Oh, hello.  Hello. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	  Soul mate.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	  What?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	  Soul mate.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 So, what have you guys been doing?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Well, we just had a terrible lunch today at Reattica. What is with all thesun-dried tomatoes at that place?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 I know! What is this, 1985?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Thats exactly what I said. Phoebe, isnt that strange.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Not really.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Whats wrong with sun-dried tomatoes? On a barbecue chicken pizza?  No?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 So Don, what-what other restaurants do you like?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Well, Octavio, 27&7Oh! And theres this great little place,Alessandros.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Oh my God! Thats my restaurant, Im the chef there.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Youre kidding me!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 No!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Your food is fantastic! Wow, I really want to talk to you about your menu,once I get some coffees first. Um, anyone want any?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Oh, Id like a latte. Oh yknow what? If youre gonnatalk about me, Im gonna go with you. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 What are you doing?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Nothing! I swear to God I didnt know you guys would be here! Andthe good news is you didnt believe in soul mates. So
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 I believe in tall, handsome strangers who hit on my wife!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Theyre just talking, and yknow what? Just because I thinktheyre soul mates doesnt mean anythings gonna happen.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	  Phoebe, good work.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Yeah?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Yeah! Oh hes great, I love him. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Dont worry, well find you someone else.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Hey.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Hey.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Look, I understand if you came by to hit me, I deserve it.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 No, I dont want to hit you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh what then? Kick me?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 No.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	  Bite me?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 No, no I dont want to do anything to you. All right? I just want totell you that Im not mad at you andand that I certainly do not hate you. Ijust, I just came here to say that. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh nowHey Ross-Ross! Do you wanna-wanna come in for a beer orsomething?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Uhyeah sure. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Do uh, do you got any beer? All-all I got is this melon stuff that Rachelleft. I dont
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Okay.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	  Hey look Ross, you need to understand somethingokay? I uhI am never gonna act on this Rachel thing, okay? I-I would never doanything to jeopardize my friendship with you. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Thank you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Anyway, it uhlook itll justtake me a while to get overher, thats all. Im not even sure how to do that, I mean Ive never beenin love before so
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 What?! Youre in love with her.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, I thought you knew that.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Umm, no.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Wow. Hey look, if it helps, I dont want to feel this way. Honest. Ijust keep thinking, "Ah, Ill get over this." Yknow? I justItjust keeps gettin harder. I dont, I dont know what to do. Yknow?What do I do?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 I think you need to tell her how you feel.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Okay thats the green stuff talkin.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 No, Im serious. You-you need to find out where she is, because ifshes not where you are, then you can start to move past this.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 But what if uhand Im not saying she will beBut
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 If she is where you are then uhthen my feeling weird about itshouldnt stand in the way.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Are you sure?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Yeah. Look if-if shes gonna end up with somebody else, the truth isshe couldnt find a better guy. So
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Hey thanks.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 So when do you think youre gonna talk to her?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh my God I have to tell her! I havent even thought about what Iwill say. What should I say?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Im understanding, but lets not get carried away.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Im sorry, youre right. What am I gonna say?  Oh!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Ross	 Yeah, tell me about it. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 so Ive been slowly phasing out the wine importing and focusingmore on the cheese side of things.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Cheese you say? Thats some pretty smelly work, huh Don?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Excuse me?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Cheese, its smelly. You must smell a lot of the time too.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Uh, not really. But when it comes to cheese, Im one of the people whothinks the smellier the better.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Me too! Yeah, Chandler cant stand it. He wont even allow meto have blue cheese in the house.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 And youre still married to him? 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 You know what Id love to do? I would like to go to France and eatnothing but bread and cheeseNot even bread, just cheese. No, I want the bread. Yeah.Ah, and pastries  And pate. Oh, Im really not high, itsjust I used to be fat.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 Well if you where ever enter the Loire valley let me know, Ive got agreat little villa you can stay at.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Is it made of cheese?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Don	 No. But God, a house made of cheese, wouldnt that be incredible?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Id move in tomorrow!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	  Oh come on!  Are you listening to this?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 Im so sorry.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 What do we do?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Phoebe	 I dont know, they both want to live in a house of cheese! Idont know how you fight that.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Okay. Okay, I can do this. I can tell her how I feel. Just uh, just standup straight.  Take a couple deep breaths.  Look confident. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Joey? Whats up?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 I uh, I just came by because I-I want to talk to you about something.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Okay whats up?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Here? In the hall? What are we animals?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Well honey, Im late for a meeting. So can you just make it quick?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Okay umm, I just came by to tell you that Iwant to have dinner withyou tonight. Thats all.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Sure! That sounds great! Just leave me a message and tell me where tomeet you. Okay? 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Okay. Thats good. Okay, that give you a couple hours to prepare whatyoure gonna say. Good. Yeah.  Dont you people ever knock?!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Id like to have Don and Phoebe over. Wouldnt that be nice?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Sure, why dont you set it up. Ill just be over here,browsing through the personals.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Are you okay? Youve been acting weird all afternoon.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Yeah, fine. Fine. Not perfect!! But good enough.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Jeez! What is with you?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Im sorry, did you say cheese?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 All right, whats going on?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Phoebe thinks you and Don are soul mates, and I dont believe inthat kind of stuff. But then you two totally get along. So look, I wont stand inyour way if you want to run off with Don and live in a house of cheese.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 Chandler, you dont believe in soul mates?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 No. But Im sure  tomatoes does.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 I dont believe in soul mates either.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 You dont?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 No. I dont think that you and I were destined to end up together.I think that we fell in love and work hard at our relationship. Some days we work reallyhard.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 So youyou dont want to live with Don in a cheese house?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 No, Ive had second thoughts about that. Do you realize how hardthat would be to clean?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 I love you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Monica	 I know.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Chandler	 Yknow what? I am going to take you out to dinner tonight. Ifound this place that makes the greatest mozzarella sticks and jalepino poppers .  No? Really? They taste so good.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time hetouches my stomach. I mean Im really worried the babys not going to like him. Are you okay?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 What? Yeah! Sure! Uh, look at the uh, the reasonIs it hot in here?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 No. Not-not for me, but why dont you take off your sweater?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 I would, but this is a nice place and my T-shirt has a picture of Calvindoing Hobbs.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh my God! Really?! Can I see it?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah. Sure. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Huh. Wow, I wouldnt think Hobbs would like that so much.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Uh How long have we known each other?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Um, sevene-e-eight, eight years. Wow.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Uh-huh, long time.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 But over the past few weeks
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter	 Hah, sorry about the wait, but it is mega-jammed in here! We have acouple specials tonight
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Actually uh, could you give us a second?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter	 Sure. Sure.  Seconds up!  Notthat kind of table. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 So you were saying?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Im not quite sure.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Okay, well you had asked me how long we had known each other, and Isaid, "Eight years." And the um, waiter came over and cut his tip in half, andummnow here we are.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah, here we are. Uhh I I think Imfalling in lovewith you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	  What?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Im falling in love with you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	  Who are you talking too? Oh, youre kidding! Oh,its a joke!  Its funny. Its funny. I dont get it.  Oh.  Okay.Umm I-Iuh, wow. Are you uh How did umm When?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Does it really matter?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Wow! Wow. Wow. Wow, it is hot in here.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Okay look Rach, I know this is a lot. You dont have to say anything.You-you uh, you take as much time as you need.  Okay,you gotta say something!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 But. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Joey.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Yeah-yeah right. Thats okay. Thats fine. Thats uh,pretty much what I was expecting. So uh, its no big deal. All right? I thinkIm gonna go. 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 No! Joey please! Please dont! Please dont leave like this!Now come on, you cannot do this to a pregnant woman! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Dont start doing that. You cant do that Rach, cause thenyoure gonna make me do that.  Oh, here we go! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Can I? 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Sure! 
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Oh Joey honey I dontI dont want to lose
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey, hey! You cant. Okay? Ever!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Im so sorry.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Joey	 Oh no-no Rach, please, dont be sorry. Okay? Dont be sorry. Yknow I was only kidding you.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Rachel	 Yeah, that was a real good one.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter No. 2	 Is this your table?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter	 Yeah.
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter No. 2	 God, youre gonna be here all night!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter	 I know! I havent even read them the specials yet!
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter No. 2	 Whats the matter with them?
08	16	0816	The One Where Joey Tells Rachel	Waiter	 I dont know. I think maybe one of them is dying.  I kindahope its the girl.  The guy is really cute!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Joey? Are you in there?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	  Oh God! Thats Rachel!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Joey, you have to talk to her!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 No-no, I cant! I cant! Not after the other night, itsjust itstoo weird, okay? Dont tell her Im here!  Dont eat that! 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hey!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Hey!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Hey Rachel!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Is Joey here?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 I dont see him.  Do you see him?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 I dont see him. Hey! Maybe hes in the sugar bowl!  Joey? Nope! 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well, at least you make each other laugh.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Whats up?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well, I havent seen him since that night that he told me how heyknow I dont know, I think hes avoiding me. Why is that bagel onthe floor?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 We were playing a game.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Ew, was Chandler naked? Sort of like a, like a ring toss kind ofsituation?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Sure.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 What?! No! No!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 All right. Well listen, if you see Joey will you just tell himuhtell him I miss him. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	  Okay, did you hear that?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Yeah, a naked bagel game?  Dude, I dont know. Thats a pretty small hole.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Honey, you gotta talk to her.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 I cant! Yknow? You guys dont know what its like toput yourself out there like that and just get shot down.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	  I dont know what thats like?! Up until I was25 I thought the only response to, "I love you," was, "Oh crap!"
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Hello? No rejection? I got shot down at fat camp! Boy, kids are meanwhen theyre hungry.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 All right so, so what do I do?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 This is Rachel. I mean, what are you gonna do, never going to talk toher again? I mean I know its weird, its awkward, but you gotta at least try.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Yeah. Okay. Whoa!  I almost forgot this was on your
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	  We didnt play it!!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay, so when youre done with your tea Ill look at yourleaves and tell you your fortune.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 I didnt know you read tea leaves.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, Ive done it for years. I actually stopped because I wasso accurate. Yknow, and-and yknow, one of the great joys of life isits-its wondrous unpredictability. Yknow? And also tea tends to give methe trots.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Okay, Im done. Read mine.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay.  Ooh, I see a ladder. Which can mean either a promotion or a violent death.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	  I-Im the head chef. I-I cant get promoted.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm, whos next?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Okay, Im done. Do mine.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay.  Umm, oh! Okay, I see a circle.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Ah.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh!  Which can either mean youre having a babyor youre gonna make a scientific discovery!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well, I have been spending a lot of time in the lab.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 What does yours say Pheebs?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Umm Wow, all right.  Wow! Yay! Ooh, Imgonna meet a guy! And really soon! And hes gonna be the man of my dreams. Probablynot the guy I had a dream about last night. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	  Hey! Has anyone seen my shirt? Its a button down, like a,like a faded salmon?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 You mean your pink shirt?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Faded salmon color.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 No, I-I havent seen your pink shirt.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Great! Great. Then I mustve left it at Monas. I knew it!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Well, Im sure you get another one at Ann Taylors.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Thats my favorite shirt! Okay? I love that shirt!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well just ask Mona to give it back!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 I dont know. I mean I-I guess I could. Its just that wedidnt really end things such good terms. And if I go over there Id be ignoringthe one thing she asked me to do when we broke up, jump up my own ass and die. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	  Oh wait asecond you guysfor the last couple weeks Ive been that guy everywhere I go. Wetake the same bus. We go to the same bookstore, the same dry cleaners; maybe hes thetea guy. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Phoebe, did you see that?! He totally checked you out! He is so cute! Mine has a picture of The Village People, what does thatmean?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hi!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Hey.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hi.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Hi.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Tea gives Phoebe the trots.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but itsnot even like we know how to be with each other anymore.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 I know its tough now, but things will get better.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 How do you know that? What if it just gets worse and worse and worse, tothe point where we cant even be in the same room with each other?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Im not great at the advice, can I interest you in a sarcasticcomment? Some cheese?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Honey, what is the Bruce Springsteen CD in the Kat Stevens case?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Lets just say if I cant find the right CD case I just putit in the nearest one.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Okay, where is the Kat Stevens CD?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 In the James Taylor case.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Where is the James Taylor CD?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Honey, Im gonna save you some time, 200 CDs, not one of them inthe right case.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Okay. No need to panic. Deep breathes everyone. Okay umm uh, werejust gonna have to spend some time and put the CDs in the right cases.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Well, if were gonna do that we should come up with some kind oforder. Yknow alphabetically or by genre?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Hmm, I dont know. We really have to talk this through.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh my God!! You guys have such problems!! I feel so terrible for you!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Okay, I-Im sorry. You and Joey, your both focusing on thisuncomfortable thing, what you need to do is to change the subject. Next time you see himtry to get him talking about something else.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh yeah. That makes sense.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Yeah, like I dont know, maybe you have a work problem that youneed his advice on.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Ooh, I can do that.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Good.  Uh honey, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 They were just giving those away at the store in exchange for money.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	  Hey!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hi.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Uh I really dont know what to tell you Rach, I really dont.I mean, maybe Joey can help you out with your, with your big work problem.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 What?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Yeah Joey shesRachels got this really big workproblem, and it is a head scratcher. Wow!  Yknow what, if weregonna make dinner were gonna have to leave. Yeah. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 So you uh, have abig work problem?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Yeah its umm Yeah its uh It-itsyknowIts nothing.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Huh. Okay.  So uh, I think Im gonna take off.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 YeahNo wait! Joey no wait it is. Its something.Its-its ummits my boss.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Yeah?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Yeah, and umm my baby.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Yeah?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 My boss wants to buy my baby!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 What?! Oh my-oh my God!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 I know I told you, its a really big problem.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 What he wants to buy your baby?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Can you believe that?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Thats crazy!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Thats what I told him!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Okay, how did this even happen?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well Ill tell ya!  See uh my-my boss and hiswifeThey-they cant have children. So umm, and thatwe were at theChristmas party, and he got drunk, and he said to me, "Rachel, I want to buy yourbaby."
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Man! When you said it was a problem about your boss and the baby I figuredit was something about maternity leave.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Ohh! Yeah!  Yeah that-that wouldve been a much simplerproblem.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh hello.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Guy	 Oh, its you. I see you everywhere. Im Jim, Jim Nelson.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh Jim, Jim Nelson Im Phoebe, Phoebe Buffay. We certainly havebeen seeing a lot of each other lately. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 We have. Maybe well be seeing each other at dinner tomorrow night,say around 8 oclock?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Well, maybe we will.  Oh! 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Mona?  Okay, if I were a salmon shirt,where would I be? 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	  I am so sorry I spilled wine all over yourshirt.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona'S Date	 Oh, its okay.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	 No, its still wet. Yknow what? Let me get it out before itsets. Ooh, I have something you can wear. Here.  
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona'S Date	 Oh umm, I-I dont know if I want to wear a womans shirt.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	 No-no thats a mans shirt.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona'S Date	 Its awfully pink. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Oh my God, honey we are so meant to be together. We both have copiesof the Annie soundtrack.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Honey, both yours.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	  Hey! Great advice on that Joey thing!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Yeah? The work problem?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh it was perfect! I mean it really felt like he was my friend again.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 What problem did you tell him you had?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh thats not important. The point is, I reallyI thinkeverythings gonna be okay.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mr. Zelner	 May I help you?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Do you think you can just buy my friends baby?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Isnt it funny how we kept running into each other? Its as ifsomeone really wants us to be together.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Someone does. Me.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh, witty banter. Well done.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 So, tell me a little bit about yourself.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh okay, well Im a masseuse, and I used to work at thisplace
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Do you like to party?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 I-I-I like, I like parties.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Youre wild, arent ya?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Yeah I guess, a little.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 It aint no thing, Im wild too.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	  So! Umm, anyway I-I lived in New York, someonewildly I guess, for ummWell since I was fourteen.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Im sorry. Im staring. Its just that you have the mostbeautiful eyes.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh stop it.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 And your breasts! Hmm!!!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay. Umm look, youre coming on a little strong. But Imgoing to give you the benefit of the doubt, because it seems the universe really wants tobe together. So, why dont we just start over okay? And you can just tell me aboutyourself.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 All right.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 I write erotic novels, for children.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 What?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Theyre wildly unpopular.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Oh also, you might be interested to know that I have a Ph.D.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Wow! You do?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Jim	 Yeah,  a Pretty Huge
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 All right. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	  The sunll come outtomorrow! Betyourbottom dollar that tomorrow  therellbe sun.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	  Hey!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hey! Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday aboutthat thing with my boss. That really meant a lot.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Not a problem. Oh, and just so you know, that guys not going to bebothering you about that baby thing anymore.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	  What?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Lets just say I took care of it.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, lets say more!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Dont worry! Dont worry. I just told him, very nicely,"You dont go buying peoples babies, so back off!!"
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 What?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler, Monica	 What?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 No! No, no-no-no Joey he doesnt want to buy my baby! I made thatup!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 What?! Why?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 So that we would have something to talk about! So it wouldnt beawkward!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 And you couldnt think of anything else?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 You said your boss wants to buy your baby?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	  I cant believe that you yelled at my boss!Im-Im gonna lose my job! What am I going to do?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 You can always sell your baby.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh Joey, I cant believe you brought my boss into this! Imgonna get fired!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 You lied to me!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well, she told me too! 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Chandler has two copies of Annie!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	  Oh my God! Ross!!!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Hello!!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	 Ross, what are you doing?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 Not touching myself if that makes anyone less uncomfortable.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Morning. You wanted to see me?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mr. Zelner	 Please, come in. Have a seat. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Okay look Mr. Zelner
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mr. Zelner	 Oh I think its best that I speak first.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Yeah. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mr. Zelner	 Ive asked Lee from human resources to be here as a witness toour conversation.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Oh God.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mr. Zelner	 If I in any way implied that I wanted to buy your babyI amsorry. Okay? Last week when I asked you when your due date was uh, I certainly did notmean that I felt that I was due your baby. Yeah, I want to be very clear that Iunderstand that its your baby, and it is not mine to purchase.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Well, as long as we are clear about that. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh there it is.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Thats not your regular dry cleaners.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 I know, but that creep that I went on that date with goes to there so Ihave to find a new one. I also have to find a new video store, a new bank, a new adultbookstore, a new grocery store
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 What?!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 A new grocery store. The universe said I was going to meet a nice guyand thats what they gave me?  When I get up there Im going to kicksome ass.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Dont worry Phoebe, youre gonna meet someone. If I can meet agreat guy, so can you.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Yeah, we both can. And we both will.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh, you didnt have to come in with me.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	 Are you kidding? This is where they get out stains! Okay? This is like Disneylandfor me. Im-Im gonna be over here watching the dance of the clean shirts. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Guy	  Oh, excuse me! I think you dropped sWow!
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 What?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Guy	 Im sorry, its just that youre so incredibly beautiful.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 Oh yeah well, Im sorry about that too, but what are you going todo?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Guy	 I hope you dont think Im crazy but I feel like I was meant topick this up, do you believe in that kind of thing?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 A little.   Nowyoure talking.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Guy	 Would you like to go out and have a cup of coffee?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	 I-I-Id love to. Let me just tell my friend.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Monica	  Ooh, an ink stain! Hey, can I watch how you get this out?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Phoebe	  She mustve left.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Hi.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 So? What-what-what happened?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Its all gonna be okay. Theyre just so happy that Imnot suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. So long as Iunderstand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any otherchild I should bear.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Wow, Ralph Lauren is really going out of there way to showtheyre not in the baby buying business.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Chandler, can you give us a minute?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Oh Im sorry, youre kicking me out of my own living room?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Chandler	 Ill be in there. 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Joey, Im really sorry that I lied to you. I was just trying tomake things
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 I know. I know.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 It kinda worked. I mean yknow, I dont know about you buy Ihavent thought about our thing since all this.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Hey youre right. Yeah, its kinda been like us again a littlebit.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 Yeah I know! I miss that.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Joey	 Me too. I mean Ihavent thought at all about how I put myselfout there and said all that stuff and how you didnt feel the same way about meand-and how it was really awkward.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Rachel	 My gynecologist tried to kill me.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	  Item J437-A, color: winterberry.  Hi umm, listen come here, come in. Im so-so sorry about yesterday. I-Im really sorry. Itsjust that I 
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	  Listen Ross, you dont have to apologize. Iunderstand why you were there.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	 You do?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	 Yeah, you still have feelings for me. And-and to be honest, I-I still havefeelings for you. And I wish that we can work it out Ross, but we cant. Itstoo complicated with you and Rachel and the baby, I-I just It just wasnt meantto be.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	  Oh God youre right.
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Mona	 Ross, wewe have to be strong. Okay, I-Im gonna go.  Can I? To remember you?
08	17	0817	The One With The Tea Leaves	Ross	  No. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Oh, Ross, Mon, is it okay if I bring someone to your parentsanniversary party?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Sure. Yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 So, whos the guy?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Well, his name is Parker and I met him at the drycleaners.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Oooh, did he put a little starch in your bloomers?  Who saidthat?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Yeah, hes really great though. He has this incredible zest forlife, and he treats me like a queen, except at night when he treats me like the naughtygirl I am.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	  Oh, by the way. Would it be okay if I gave the toast to momand dad this year?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Uh, yeah, you sure you want to after what happened at their 20th?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Yeah, Id really like to.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Okay, hopefully this time mom wont boo you.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Yes! Every year Ross makes the toast, and its always reallymoving, and always makes them cry. Well this year Im going to make them cry.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 And you wonder why Ross is their favorite?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 No! Really! Any time Ross makes a toast everyone cries, and hugs him,and pats him on the back and they all come up to me and say, "God, yourbrother." Know what theyll say this year? "God, you"
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Well I can promise you, at least one person will be crying.  Im an actor, and any actor worth himself can cry on cue. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Really you can do that?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Are you kidding me? Watch!  Well Icant do it with you guys watching me!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 What are you doing?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Oh Im working on my toast for the party, or as I like to call it.Sob fest 2002. Hey check this out. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Its a dog.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Its a dead dog. Thats Chi-Chi; she died when I was in highschool.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Its your parents anniversary and youre going to talkabout their dead pet?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 The good stuff, huh?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Hi!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Hey!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Hey!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 You got a present for my parents. Thats so sweet.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, in honor of their 35th wedding anniversary, I had astar named after them. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Aww that is so cool.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 And I got them a book on Karma Sutra for the elderly.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Hey, do you guys have any extra ribbon?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Yeah, sure. What do you need? We got lace, satin, sateen, raffia,gingham, felt,  and I think my testacles may be in here too.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	  Aww! Chi-Chi! Oh, I loved this dog!Yknow Monica couldnt get braces because Chi-Chi needed knee surgery.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 What?!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 You were the 200-pound 11-year-old who rode her!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	All	 Hi!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Everybody, this is Parker, Parker this is
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 No, no, no wait! Dont tell me. Let me guess.  Joey, Monica, Ross, Rachel and, Im sorry Phoebe didnt mentionyou.  Chandler, Im kidding all ready youre my favorite!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Ha!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Why dont all of you tell me a little about your self?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Ah, actually, Im sorry we-we probably should get going.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	  Classic Ross. Rachel, Rachel, oh how you glow. May I? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 I, uh, think you already are.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Rachel, you have life growing inside you. Is there anything in thisworld more miraculous thanOh a picture of a dog! Whose is this?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Thats my old dog. He passed away years ago.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Oh well, at least you were lucky to have him. Bow-wow old friend,bow-wow. So wheres the party?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Its out on the island. Its in Massapequa. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Maaaassapequa, sounds like a magical place. Tell me about Massapequa, isit steep in Native American history? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Well, there is an Arbys in the shape of a tee-pee.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Okay, I got my note cards.  Do you got the presents? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 And Ive got the car keys.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Were driving!?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Aces!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 So uh, he seems like a nice guy.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah I like him a lot.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Ya wanna hang back and take our own cab?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Yeah, otherwise Im not going.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mr., Mrs. Geller	 Hi
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Hi!  Hey mom.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 This is such a great party! 35 years. Very impressive, do you guys haveany pearls of wisdom? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Jack?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mr. Geller	 Why would you serve food on such a sharp stick? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Thats a good question, dad. Thats a good question
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Hmmm.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	  Congratulations you two!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Thank youwere so excited
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 And also, congratulations on your wedding.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 WhaWhat?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Can we talk to you for just a yknow Its just alittle thing. Well we think its absolutely marvelous that youre having thisbaby out of wedlock, some of our friends are less open-minded. Which is why wevetold them all that youre married.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross, Rachel	 What?!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Thanks for going along with this.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Dad so what we have to pretend that were married?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mr. Geller	 Son, I had to shave my ears for tonight. You can do this.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Can you believe that?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Yeah, if youre going to do the ears, you might as well take a passat the nosal area.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 No, us having to lie about being married.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 No, I know I dont either, but ya know what, its their party,and its just one night. And we dont even have to lie; we just wont sayanything. If it comes up again, well justsmile. Well nod along.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 Ross!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Man	 Rachel!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Hi Aunt Lisa, Uncle Dan
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Aunt Lisa	 Congratulations on the baby, and on the wedding
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross, Rachel	 Hmmmm.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Uncle Dan	 Heres a little something to get you started. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Oh
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Aunt Lisa	 So, hows married life treating you?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	  Unbelievable!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 We love marriage!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Aunt Lisa	 Great!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Hey
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 What a beautiful place. What a great night! I have to tell you, beinghere with all of you in Event Room CI feel so lucky. I think of all the good timesthat have happened here. The birthdays, the proms, the mitzvahs both bar and bat, but noneof them will compare with tonight! My God, I dont want to forget this moment!Its like I want to take a mental picture of you all! Click! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 I dont think the flash went off.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Dahaaa! Im going to find the mens room, be right back.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Ill go with you
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Come on!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Somewhere there is someone with a tranquilizer gun and a hugebutterfly net looking for that man.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 I have to go to the bathroom too, but I dont want him complimentingmy thing.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Im so we werent in the car! Did he ever let up?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 He called the Long Island Expressway a concrete miracle.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	  This room! This night! That waiter! His shoes! I musttake a mental picture!  Ooh sorry
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Were you guys making fun of Parker?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 That depends, how much did you hear?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 So, he a little enthusiastic, whats wrong with that?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Its just that, its so much.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Well, so what I like him! Do I make fun of the people youve dated?Tag, Janice, Mona? No, because friends dont do that. But, do you want my opinion? Doyou want it? Cause in my opinion, your collective dating record reads like thewhos who of human crap. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 I feel terrible.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 I know
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 What was wrong with Mona?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Open it! Open it! Open it!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Yeah baby!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Man	 So we never got to hear about your wedding!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 We were surprise that we werent invited.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 No, no, it was just our parents and 1 or 2 friends. It was a smallwedding.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 But it was beautiful. I mean it was small, but kind of spectacular.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Man	 Where did you have it?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 On a cliff, in Barbados, at sunset, and Stevie Wonder sang IsntShe Lovely as I walked down the aisle.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 Really? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Yeah, Stevies an old family friend. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 Oh my God. That sounds amazing. I would love to see pictures.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 So would I. You wouldnt think that Annie Liebawitz would forget toput film in the camera.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Would you excuse us for a second? Umm. what are you doing?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 What? Im not you. This may be the only wedding I ever have. I wantit to be amazing.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Okay, okay. Ooooh, ooh maybe I rode in on a Harley. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Okay, Ross, it has to be realistic.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Are you okay? You seem kind of quiet.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 No, Im fine. Im great. Im with you.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 And Im with you! What a great time to be alive! Look at thisplate-bouncy thing.  What an inspired solution to mans platedispensing problems. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Hm huh, yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Ah! Oysters! Let me feed you one.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 No, thats not necessary.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Please.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 No, actually I dont eat
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 I wont quit until you try.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Okay, fine! Fine!  Mmmhmmmmm.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 What are they like? Ive never had one.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Why dont you just try one?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 No, they look too weird.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 What are you doin?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Just going over my toast. Those two will never know what hit em. Icant wait. Theyre going to be crying so hard. Theyre going to befighting for breath. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Chandler	 Ya know if you want to, I can just hold them down and you could.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 And my veil was lace, made by blind, Belgium nuns.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	 Blind?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Well, not at first, but it was very intricate work and they said eventhough they lost their sight, it was all worth it.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Aunt Lisa	 Ill bet you looked beautiful
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Well, I dont know about that, but some said that I looked like afloating angel.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Woman	  So, how did you propose?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Oh yeah. Thats a great story.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Well, um, actually, I-I took her to the planetarium.Thats-thats where we had our first date. Um, she walked in and I had the roomfilled with lilies, her favorite flower
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Aunt Lisa	 Oh that is so sweet!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Shhh! I want to hear the rest!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Then, Fred Astaire singing The Way You Look Tonight came on thesound system, and the lights came down. And I got down on one knee and written across thedome in the stars were the words "Will you marry me?"
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 And the ring, was the size of my fist !
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Yeah uh, Phoebe! Look umm, I want to apologize about before, okay? We werebeing jerks. Parkers a nice guy and Id like to get to know him.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Then you better do it now.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Why?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Because Im going to kill him
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 What-what? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 You guys were right. Hes just too excited abouteverything. Imean Im all for living life, but this is the Gellers 35thanniversary. Okay? Lets call a spade a spade this party stinks.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 I know Im having the worst time. There was a 15-minute line for thebuffet, and when I finally got up to the plates, I slipped on a giant booger!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Are you sure it wasnt an oyster?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 I guess it couldve been, I didnt really look at it.Yknow, I just wiped it on Chandlers coat and got the hell out of there.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Hes just such a great guy Im so excited about him.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Oh hey, you should be excited about him. Theres nothing wrong withhim hes a good guy. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 You think?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Yeah. Ya know what I think; I think we were all just being too negative.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Youre right. Youre right, hes just embracing life. Wecould all stand to be a little more like Parker. You know what? I am like him! Im asunny, positive person. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Actually, you have a little bit of an edge.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Whats that now?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Joey	 Nothing
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Oh look its Parker! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Look! Its the bunny hop!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Oooh I love it!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 You do?!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Are you kidding? People acting like animals to music. Come on!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Okay its time for the toast! Umm now-now, I know that Ross usuallygives the toast, but this year Im going to do it.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 No, no its going to be great. Really! Mom, Dad, when I gotmarried, one of the things that made me sure I could do it was the amazing example the twoof you set for me. For that and so many other things I want to say thank you. I know Iprobably dont say it enough, but I love you.  When I look around this room, Im-Im saddened by the thought ofthose who could not be here with us. Nana, my beloved grandmother who would so want to behere, but she cant because shes dead. As is our dog Chi-Chi. I mean look howcute she is. . Was.  Do me a favor and pass this to my parents. Remember shes dead. Okay, her andNana, gone. Wow! Hey does anybody remember when Debra Winger had to say goodbye to herchildren in Terms of Endearment?  Didnt see that?No movie fans?! You want to hear something sad? The other day I was watching 60 Minutesthese orphans in Romania, who have been so neglected, they were incapable of love.  You people are made of stone!Heres to mom and dad! Whatever!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Thank you Monica that was uh, interesting. Wasnt itinteresting, Jack?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mr. Geller	  Why dont I remember this dog?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Ross, why dont you give us your toast now?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Oh, no, Mom, its just Monica this year.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	 Youre not going to say anything? On our 35thwedding anniversary
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 No, of course, Um Um, everybody? Um, I-I just wanted to sayonbehalf of my new bride, Rachel , and myself. Umm, thatifif in 35 years, were half as happy as you guys are, well countourselves the luckiest people in the world.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mrs. Geller	  Oh Ross
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Mr. Geller	 I just wish Nana were alive to hear Rosss toast.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 My God what a fantastically well lit hallway!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Can I get you something to drink? Like a water and Valium? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 I must say this apartment, its, its, There are no words
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Oh thank God. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Its a haven. A third-floor paradise. A modern-day Eden in themidst
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Yeah? I know! I know! Uh huh? Listen why dont we just um, sit andrelax? You know just be with each other. Quietly! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 That sounds great.  My God this is the most comfortable couchIve ever sat on in my entire life. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Lets try something else, lets play a game.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 I love games!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Shocking! Lets play the game of who can stay quiet the longest.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 OrJenga.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 But, lets play this one first. And remember whoever talks firstloses! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 I lose, now Jenga.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Oh my God! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Is something wrong?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Wrong? Really? You know the word wrong. Everything isnt perfect?Everything isnt magical? Everything isnt a glow with the light of a millionfairies? They were just brake lights, Parker! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Well, excuse me for putting a good spin on a traffic jam!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 You dont have to put a good spin on everything.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Im sorry thats who I am. Im a positive person.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 No! I am a positive person. You are like Santa Clause on Prozac, at Disneyland,getting laid! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 So what do you want me to do, you want me to be more negative, lesshappy?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Much less happy!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Fine! Well then to quote Ross, "Id better be going." 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 So long! Dont let the best door in the world hit you in the ass onyour way out! 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Parker	 Isnt this the most incredible fight youve ever had in yourentire life? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Phoebe	 Uh huh. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 and then, we couldve gone from the ceremony to the receptionwith you in the sidecar!
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Ross, it just wouldnt have been feasible.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 But having a dove place the ring on your finger wouldve been noproblem?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 It was really fun being married to you tonight. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Yeah! And! And, it was the easiest 400 bucks Ive ever made.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Okay Ross, can I uh, can I ask you something?
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Yeah.
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 That proposal, at the planetarium
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 I know, I know it was stupid. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Are you kidding?! With the, with the lilies, and-and the song, and thestars! It wasreally wonderful! Did you just make that up? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 No, actually I thought about it when, when we were going out. Itshow I imagined I uh, I would ask you to marry me. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Well, that wouldve been very hard to say no too. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Its a good thing I didnt do it, because it sounds like itwouldve been a very expensive wedding.  Okay, good night
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 Goodnight
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Even if the sidecar had a windscreen so your hair wouldnt get messedup? 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Rachel	 I will think about it. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Thats all Im askin 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Okay thats it. I give up. At mom and dads 40thanniversary, youre the one giving the speech. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Yknow I dont understand why they didnt cry. It was abeautiful speech. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	 Oh, come on. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Ross	 Hey! All that stuff you said about true love, you were right, I mean, wedid learn a lot from Mom and Dad! And that picture of Chi-Chi with her mischievous grin.And what you said about Nana. Ohh, yeah she really wouldve wanted to be there. Andyou know what? I think she was. 
08	18	0818	The One In Massapequa	Monica	  Oh good God, Ross! How the hell do you do it? 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Hi!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Hey!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 Hey!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 So, Im in my apartment doing the Soap Opera Digestcrossword puzzle, and guess who the clue is for three down. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Three down, Days Of Our Lives star blank Tribbiani.Thats me!! Im blank!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 How cool is this?! We know three down! Im touching three down!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah you are baby.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 Three down knows Im married, whats three down doin?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 So did they call you to tell you your names gonna be in this?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 No. They really like me over there. They want to do a big profile on me,but I said no.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Whyd you say no?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Remember what happened the last time I did an interview for them? I said Iwrite a lot of my own lines, and then the writers got mad and made my character fall downthe elevator shaft. So who knows what I might say this time.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 If only there was something in your head to control the thingsyou say. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh, come on Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time, and plusyknow the publicity would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! Andif you do the interview you can mention, oh I dont know, gal pal Rachel Green?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Is that gal pal spelled L-O-S-E-R?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Okay, dont listen to him. Please?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Fine! All right, Ill do it. But hey! You guys have to be at the nexttable so you can stop me if I yknow, start to say something stupid.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Just then or-or all the time, cause we-we have jobs yknow.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Come on! We will be there for you the whole time! Just remember gal palRachel Green.  Ha-ha! Im gonna be in Soap Opera Digest! And not justin the dumb crossword puzzle.  Seriously, proud of you.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 I really appreciate you taking the time to do this.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, not at all. Happy to do it.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	  You think were being obvious?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 No, were just four people with neck problems. You talk likethis. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	  Yknow I think its great you wanted to meethere. Yknow when most people hear the magazine is paying for it they want to go to abig fancy restaurant.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Actually, I didnt know the magazine was paying for it.Wouldnt have mattered, Im doing this for the fans, not for the free food.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Gunther	 Can I get you anything?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Umm, Ill have a cup of coffee.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 And Ill have all the muffins.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	  Hey!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Shhh! Were not talking.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Oh. Finally! Oh. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 So, according to your bio, youve done quite a bit of workbefore Days of Our Lives. Anything youre particularly proud of?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Host	 Folks, has this ever happened to you. You go to the refrigerator to get anice glass of milk,  andthese darn cartons are so flingin'-flangin' hard to open.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, you said it Mike.  Aw! There's got to be a better way!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Mike	 And there is Kevin.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Mike	 This is the first time hes ever used this product, he's never used thisproduct before, you're gonna see how easy this is to do.  Go ahead.  This works with any milk carton.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Wow, it is easy.  Now, I can have milk everyday.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Lauren	 So this is it? Victor?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah, I guess it is. And so Im gonna get on thisspaceship,  and Im gonna go to Blargon 7 in searchof alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, youll be long gone. ButI wont have aged at all.  So you tell yourgreat-great-granddaughter to look me up, because Adrienne babyIm gonnawant to meet her. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Shh, OK, here I come, here I come. See I'm comin' to fix the copier, Ican't get to the copier, I'm thinkin' what do I do, what do I doso I just watch 'emhave sex. And then I say, wait, here's my line,  you know that's bad forthe paper tray.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Nice work my friend.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on, the guy'sbutt's blockin' me. There I am, there I am, there I am, there I am, there I am
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Well, there are so many things, its hard to pick just one.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Im gonna get some coffee, anyone want anything?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh yeah, Id actually love a blueberry muffin and a chamomile tea.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Uh, double latte, extra foam.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 And a bagel with only
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	  I was just being polite!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Okay, how about when youre not working. What do you do inyour spare time?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Look at this clown! Just because hes got abigger boat he thinks he can take up the whole river.  Get out of the wayjackass!  Who names their boat Coast Guard anyway?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 That is the Coast Guard. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 What are they doing out here? The coasts all the way over there.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	  Hey!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding hisbreath for almost four minutes! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Dude! What are yoyou trying to kill me?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Well, I see you've had a very productive day. Don't you think thecowboy hat is a little much?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	  Come on, it'sfun!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 All right!  Isn't this a woman's hat?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Dude, stop talking crazy and make us some tea!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Yknow what, we have to turn off the porn.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 I think youre right.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 All right, ready?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 One.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Two.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Both	 Three.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Thats kinda nice.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Yeah, thats kinda a relief.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 You wanna see if we still have it?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 FREE PORN!!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 We have free porn here!!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 In my spare time I uh, read to the blind. And Im also a mento forthe kids. Yknow a mento, a role model. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 A mento
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Right.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Like the candy?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Matter of fact, I do.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Well umm, another thing our readers always want to know is howour soap stars stay in such great shape. Do you have some kind of fitness regime?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Uh, we stars just try to eat right and get lots of exercise.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball, without droppingit, for like an hour?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Are you serious?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah. I realized it about a half-hour ago but I didn't want to sayanything 'cause I didn't want to jinx it.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Wow! We are pretty good at this!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Hey! We totally forgot about lunch!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, I-I, I think that's the first time I ever missed a meal!  Yeah, my pants are a little loose!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Whats wrong with you?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Nothing! Well, I-I got this blinding pain in my stomach when I waslifting weights before, then I uh passed out and uh, havent been able to stand upsince. But um, I dont think its anything serious.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 This sounds like a hernia. You have toyou-youGo to thedoctor!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 No way! Kay look, if I have to go to the doctor for anythingits gonna be for this thing sticking out of my stomach!  Why did I have to start working out again? Damn you 15s!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Its a trifle. Its got all of these layers. Firsttheres a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made fromscratch.  thena little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 It tastes like feet!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 I like it.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Are you kidding?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Whats not to like? Custard? Good. Jam? Good. Meat? Goooooood.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 The fridge broke. I have to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream,limesHey, what was in that brown jar?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Thats still in there?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Not anymore. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh! Yay! Look! Theres a piece that doesnt have floor onit!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Stick to your side!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Hey, come on now!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  All right, what are we havin? 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Uhh, I dont believe in these crazy diets yknow, justeverything in moderation.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Gunther	 Your muffins. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Ill take those to go.  For the kids.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You were on the show yearsago and then they killed you off. What happened there?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 It was so stupid, I said some stuff in an interview that I shouldnthave said. But believe me, thats not gonna happen today.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Understood. So, whatd you say back then?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Well, I said that I 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 You guys, this is Shelley, shes interviewing me for Soap OperaDigest, and Shelley, this are my friends
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	  Hi! Im gal pal Rachel Green, and if you wantthe dirt, Im the one you come too. This might be Joeys baby , who knows? Im just kiddingSeriously,  gal pal Rachel Green.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	  Who just lost the respect of herunborn child.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Umm, Im gonna just go get this warmed up. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Okay.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 Joey! Youre doing great!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Yeah, so far nothing stupid.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Mento?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 No thanks.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	  So, as Joeys friends, is there anything thatyou guys think our readers ought to know?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Uh no, no just-just that he is a great guy.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	  Yeah, thats gonna get you into Soap OperaDigest. Well II would just like to saythat Joey truly has enriched the days of our lives.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Umm, II just think you dont expect someone so hot to be sosweet.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Oh! I like that. Whats your name?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Umm, Phoebe Buffay.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 How do you spell that? So we can get it right.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Oh okay, its P as in Phoebe, H as in hoebe, O as in oebe, E as inebe, B as in bee-bee and E as in  Ello there mate!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Great! Well, it was nice meeting all of you.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Yeah, you too.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 You too!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Thanks.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 Bye. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 So it seems like you have a lot of friends, who would you sayis your best friend?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 How come you have two?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Well this one's for you.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Get out.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 No, I can't. No-no, listen, I, I know how much this means to you and Ialso know that this is about more than just jewelry,  it's aboutyou and me and the fact that we're  best buds.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Wow, is this friendship? I think so. Check it out, we're bracelet buddies.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 That's what they'll call us.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh, Joey! Sorry!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 No thats all right. Dont worry about it.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh but look! Thats gonna leave a stain! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Rach! Hey! Its fine! Youre at Joeys!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Really?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah! Look! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Ive never lived like this before.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 I know.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 All right, dont waste it, I mean its still food. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 All right I've been feeling incredibly guilty about this, because I wannabe a good friend, and damnit I am a good friend. So just, just shut up and close your eyes.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Wow, you are a good friend, 'course the audition was this morning, and Ididn't get it. But that was a hell of a kiss. Rachel is a very lucky girl.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 All right. Let's get the contestants out of their isolation booths. And they're off! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Get your foot off my contestant! Judge!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Judge rules, no violation.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Ohhh.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 And the duck gets the Nutter-Butter!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	  No!! Hey-hey that's not a Nutter-Butter, that'sjust an old Wonton!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Judge rules, Nutter-Butter.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Ohh, tough call.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Id seen this thing on The Discovery Channel...
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Wait a minute! I saw that! On The Discovery Channel, yeah!About jellyfish and how if you...  Ewwww!! Youpeed on yourself?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe, Rachel	 Ewwww!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 You cant say that!! You-you dont know!! I mean I thoughtI was gonna pass out from the pain! Anyway I-I tried, but I-I couldnt...bend thatway. So... 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe, Ross, Rachel	  Ewwww!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Thats right I stepped up! Shes my friend and she neededhelp! And if I had too, Id pee on anyone of you!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Umm, no. No best friend, no. Just a lot of close friends.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 So umm, now back to the show. How does it feel to have a hugegay fan base?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Really? Me? Wow! I dont even know any huge gay people!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 It hurts me. It physically hurts me.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Now, off the record, youre not
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 What? Are you referring to my man's bag? At first, I thought it justlooked good, but it's practical too. Check it out! It's got compartments for all yourstuff! Your wallet! Your keys! Your address book!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Your make-up!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Okay. Now-now-now should I climb down your front so were face toface or-or should I climb down your back so were-were butt to face.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 I think face to face.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 I would say that.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Face to face, yeah!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Okay, here I go.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 All right. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Oh my How much do you weigh Ross?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 I prefer not to answer that right now, Im still carrying a littleholiday weight.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yknow, when we talked about face to face, I dont think wethought it all the way through.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Hey Pheebs! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Check it out.  How much of a man am I?!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Wow! Nice! Manly and also kind of a slut.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Youre turning into a woman.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 No Im not. Why would you say that? Thats just mean.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Now Ive upset you? What did I say?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Its not what you said. Its the way you said it Oh MyGod, Im a woman!!!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Great nap.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 It really was.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Uh me? Gay? No! No. No, but I have a number of close friends who are.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 So, lets talk about women. Im sure our femalereaders will be interested to know about your romantic life.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh-oh-oh-oh, how I do it is, I look a woman up and down and say,"Hey, how you doin?"
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Phoebe	 Oh, please!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	  Hey, how you doin?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Hey! How you doin?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Woman	  He has the most amazing Porsche under there!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Id love to show ya, but I just tucked her in. Shes sleeping. Hey uh, would you two girls like to go for a drink? 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Woman	 Hi, is Rachel here? Im her sister.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Oh my God, Jill!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Jill	 Oh my God, Rachel!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Chandler	 Oh my God, introduce us!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 This is Chandler. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Jill	 Hi!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 And you know Monica and Ross!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Hi Jill.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 And thats Phoebe , and thats Joey.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Hey,  how you doin?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Dont!! 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Janine	 No! I mean you're a really nice guy and I'm happy to be your roommateand your friend, I'm just y'know, I just don't feel that way about you.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh! I see what happened. It's because I was trying to repel you. Right?Believe me, you'd feel a lot different if I turned it on.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Janine	 I don't think so.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, I do.  How you doin?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Janine	 I'm okay.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 What?!?! Oh dear God!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Not much to tell there Im really shy.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 So, thats it. I guess thats all I need. Thank youso much. I think they will be running this in the beginning of next month.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh great! Great! Thank you. 
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Bye.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Bye-bye.  I did it!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Yeah!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Amazing! Amazing!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	  Oh wait! I almost forgot. We have to ask everybodythis. Other than Days of Our Lives, whats your favorite soap opera?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, I dont watch soap operas. Excuse me, I have a life, yknow?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	The Interviewer	 Thank you. The readers at Soap Opera Digest will behappy to hear that.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh, good to know.  So close!
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Rachel	 Wow! I cant believe they didnt put it in the part where yousaid you didnt watch soap operas.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Yeah, I called the lady about that. I told her I was just joking. She waspretty nice about that.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Monica	 You slept with her didnt you?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Little bit, yeah.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Wow! This picture of you sure is steamy.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Oh yeah, thats just a little something for my huge gay fan base.
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Ross	 Did you just wink at me?
08	19	0819	The One With Joey's Interview	Joey	 Hey, youre the one that loves the picture.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	  Hi!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Hey!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Hey!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 So whats the final head count on my baby shower?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 About twenty, a couple people from work who had something else to do. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Also both of your sisters called and neither can make it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 What?! You mean theyre not coming to a social event wheretheres no men and theres no booze?! Thats shocking! I dont care,as long as my moms here.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Oh my God, your mother!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 What?! My moms not gonna be here?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Well, given that we forgot to invite her it would be an awfully bigcoincidence if she was.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 My God!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Well it wasnt my fault, Phoebe was in charge of the invitations!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Well I dont, I dont have a mother so often I forget thatother people
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	  Oh give it a rest!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 So my mother is not coming to my baby shower?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 No.  Neither is mine.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Okay, yknow what? Dont worry, okay? Well take care ofit. Well call her. Just go home and get ready.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Please, make sure she comes. Its really important to me, I meanits my mom!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 I know. I know, whats her number?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 I dont know.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Go! I have it in my book. Go!   Wait a minute! If youre in charge of the invitations why am Ithe one who has to call herHello Mrs. Green! Hi, its Monica Geller.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh, hello Monica.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	  Hi, umm I know this is last minute, but weve decided tothrow an impromptu baby shower for Rachel today.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 I know, my daughters told me about it when they received theirimpromptu invitations a month ago.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yeah, Im sorry. Im-Im so sorry.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 For what dear? For not inviting me or lying about it?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	  Oh my God, my ass is sweating!  Please! Please!Can you come? Its today at four.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Well all right. Ill see you at four.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Thank you. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Isnt it at three?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Son of a bitch! 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Hey Joe! You wanna shoot some hoops?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Oh no, I cant go. Im practicing; I got an audition to be thehost of a new game show.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Oh cool!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Thats great.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Yeah-yeah, and if I get it by day Ill  Dr. DrakeRemoray, but by night Ill be  Joey Trrrribbiani!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Youll be perfect for this! Thats already your name!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 But the auditions in a couple hours and I dont even understandthe game.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Well do you want some help?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Oh really? Thatd be great! You guys can be the contestants!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Awesome!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Okay, I guess we can lose to junior high girls some other time.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  All right! Lets play Bamboozled!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Bamboozled?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Yeah, isnt that a cool name?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  Yeah!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	  No!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 All right. Uhh, okay. Our first contestant is Ross Geller. Why dontyou tell us a little something about you Ross?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Well uh, I-Im a paleontologist. Umm, I-I live in New York. I have ason Ben. Uh, hi Ben!  And uh
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 I said a little bit Ross. Now, how about you Chandler?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Well Joey, Im a headhunter. I hook up out of work Sovietscientists with rogue third-world nations. Hi Rasputin! 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Excellent! Lets play Bamboozled! Chandler, youll go first.What is the capital of Columbia?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Bogota.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Its Ba-go-ta, but close enough. Now, you can either pass your turnto Ross or pick a Wicked Wango card.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 What does a Wicked Wango card do?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 I should know that. Lets see, just one moment please. Umm, here weare, a Wicked Wango card determines whether you go higher or lower.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Higher or lower than what?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 This is embarrassing. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	  Can you believe how lame this is?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Im sorry, I dont believe contestants are allowed to talk toeach other.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Oh, I told the stripper to be here at five. Thats good right?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 You ordered a stripper for the shower?! That is totally inappropriate!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 What? Hes gonna be dressed as a baby!  Oh hiMrs. Green!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Hi!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Im so glad you could make it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yes, thank you so much. And again, were so sorry. We could notfeel worse about it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Try. Theres my little girl. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Shes still mad.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Yeah I know. Isnt it great? One less person we have to make smalltalk with.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Phoebe, Sandras mad at you too. It-it doesnt bother you?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 No look, weve apologized twice! I cant do anymore than that.I know you hate it when people are mad at you but you just have to be okay with it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Okay. I can do that.  I gotta go powder my ass.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Look at that face! Just like when you were in high school! If Ididnt know better Id say you were a cheerleader in trouble. Come on,lets get some tea.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Okay. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh my look at that. Only three weeks to go, now have you picked yournanny yet? Now I dont want you to use your housekeeper cause it would justsplit her focus.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh well actually gonna use a nanny and uh, I dont even have ahousekeeper.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Its like youre a cave person. Rachel, you must get ananny. You dont know how overwhelming this is going to be. I mean when you were ababy I had full time help, I had Mrs. Kay.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Mrs. Kay! Oh yeah, she was sweet. She taught me Spanish. I actuallythink I remember some of it, tu madre es loca. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Such a sweet woman.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Well, however great she was I just cant afford that.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh Rachel!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 What?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 I just had the greatest idea! Im gonna come live with you!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Wh-wh-what? What?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh, Im so happy Im gonna do this for my little girl. Aw,look at you. You have tears in your eyes.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Yes. Yes I do.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 All right Ross youre in the lead, would you like to take anotherquestion or spin the Wheel of Mayhem?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 The wheel has not been my friend tonight Joey. Uh, Ill take anotherquestion. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Okay, this is gonna be tough. Hold your breath.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Its okay, Im ready.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 No dude, you gotta hold your breath until youre ready to answer thequestion.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 This is ridiculous, hes not gonna hold his breath 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Okay, what do you have a fear of if you suffer from this phobia,TrisHoly cow, thats a big word. Trisc Seriously look at this thing.Chandler, how do you say that?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Let me see that.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 This one right here. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Triscadecaphobia.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  The fear of Triscuts! 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 No! No, fear of the number 13.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Fear of Triscuts?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Its possible, they have really sharp edges.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 All right Chandler, youre up.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Wait a minute, I-I believe Im entitled to use my Angel Pass for afree turn?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 This game makes no sense!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Yknow what? Youre just upset because youre losing.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Oh come on Ross, I think were all losers here.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 All right. Chandler, you can either spin the wheel or pick a Google card.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Let me think. Let me thinkOh! I dont care.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 You-you must choose Mr. Bing.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Either, it makes no difference.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Choose, you jackass!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Ill take a card.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Okay, you picked the Gimmie card! You get all of Rosss points!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 What?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 This game is kinda fun.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  You dont think its a little crazy that you getall my points just cause you
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 I dont think the contestants are supposed to speak to eachother.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Why did you invite my mother?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 What?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 For how long?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Eight weeks. I mean I love my mother, but my God, a long lunch with heris taxing.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 I personally would be honored if she wanted to live with me.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 She cant hear you.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 What? You guys, come on! What am I going to do?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Well, if you dont want your mother to move in with you, just tellher.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Youre right. Youre right. I mean Im about to have ababy, I can tell my mother that I dont want her to just be sleeping on my couch! Ohmy God! Shes gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. This cannot happen!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Thats right. That is right, you go over there and tell her youdont want her to live with you. Do not take no for an answer!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Okay. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	  This is great! Now shes gonna be mad at Rachel!Yknow what? And Im just gonna swoop in there and be like the daughter shenever had.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 I have new respect for Chandler. All right everybody! Its time toopen the presents!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yes! Yes! And I think that the first gift that Rachel opensshould be from the grandmother of the baby, because youre the most important personin this room. And in the world!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Well uh, I dont have a gift because I wasnt inviteduntil the last minute, but thank you so much for bringing that to everyonesattention.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 How about you less important people, lets open your presents!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Mom thats okay that you didnt get you a gift!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Well, I kinda did. Me. Eight weeks of me.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh yeah. Okay, see mom, the truth is I can do this on my own.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Sweetheart I know youre gonna be terrific mom, I just thinkyou need a little help, especially at the beginning.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 But mom, I really know what Im doing. I can handle this.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Really? Remember Twinkles?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 He was a hamster! I am not going to vacuum up my baby!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Okay, come on Rach its present time! Yknow youre theglue thats holding this whole party together. Its kinda falling apart here.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh look.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Wow!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Okay, this is from your friend at work.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh my gosh! Oh wow! Oh, I know what this is!  Wait a minute. That cant be right. Is that a beerbong for a baby?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Darling, thats a breast pump!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Did I say I was done guessing? Okay, thank you for that. Oh wow!Whats this?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Woman	 Its a diaper genie.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh, it dispenses clean diapers!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Woman	 No! Its where you put the dirty ones!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Well thats gross, why dont you just take it outside andthrow it in a dumpster?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh youre gonna do that ten times a day?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 What?! It goes ten times a day! What are we feeding this baby?! Indianfood?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 No dear, thats what babies do.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Rachel, listen to your mother. She is very smart.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Plus, what are you planning on doing with the baby while youretrotting out to the garbage ten times a day?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 I dont know, Id leave it on the changing table?  What?! Whatd I do? Whatd I do?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 You cant leave a baby alone!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh comeOf course I know that. I mean of course younever leave a baby alone! I mean who wouldshe wouldnt be safe as she would bewith me, the baby dummy. Oh God, okay. Yknow what? I think opening the presentsright now is a little overwhelming right now. So I think umm, Im just gonna maybeopen them a little bit later, but thank you all for coming. And for these beautiful gifts,and this basket is beautiful.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Woman	 Its actually a bassinet. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Okay mommy, dont ever leave me. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  In what John Houston film would you hear this line,"Badges? We dont need no stinkin badges!"
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Treasure of the Sierra Madre!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Correct! Theres a possible backwards bonus!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Madre Sierra the of Treasure!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Yes!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Id like to go up the ladder of chance to the golden mud hutplease.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Wise choice, how many rungs?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Six!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  That noise can only me one thing.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	  Hungry monkey.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  Hungry monkey! Haaa!  Id like a Wicked Wango card!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Okay, its an audio question, name this television theme song.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  Oh.  Oh! Oh my God! Okay, I know this, give me-give me asecond!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Tell it to the Time Turtle!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Shut up! I Dream of Genie!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Yes! Yes, youre back in the lead!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Id like to spin the wheel!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	  Oh come on!!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 All right! All right! Uh, umm, Super-Speedy Speed round!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Is there a hopping bonus?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Of course!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Who invented bifocals? 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Ben Franklin.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Correct! Which monarch has ruled Great Britain the longest?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Queen Victoria.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Correct again! But, you forgot to switch legs between questions, so nohopping bonus!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Noooo!!! Every time!!!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Now, over to Chandler.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Id like a Google Card.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Are you sure?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Yes!  No!  Google!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Oh my God! Congratulations Ross, because Chandler, youve beenBamboozled!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 Nooo!!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Yeah!!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Chandler	 This is the best game ever!!!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 So umm, youre gonna stay with me as long as I need you?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Of course I am!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh mom, I swear Im not an idiot. Ive read all kinds of bookson pregnancy and giving birth, but I-I just didnt think to read the part about whatto do when the baby comes. And-and then guess what? The babys coming and Idont know what to do. Oh, can I throw up in my diaper genie?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 No. Sweetie, youre gonna be fine. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Wait-wait where are you going? Where are you going?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Im going to the bathroom.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Okay.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Now dont worry! Everythings gonna be okay. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 It is going to be okay!  It was worth a shot.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  Hey!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Hey! Why are you all red and sweaty?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 I just Bamboozled Chandler!  Which is not uh sexual thing. That was a quick shower.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Not if you were here.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Wow! It looks like we got a lot of good stuff.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh we did, but my mom got us the greatest gift of all.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	  A Play-Dough Barber Shop?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 No. Shes going to live with us for eight weeks.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Uh, what?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Yes! Shes gonna help us take care of the baby! Woo-hoo. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 WhatYoure not serious. I mean shes a very nice woman,but there is no way we can take eight weeks of her. Shell drive us totally crazy.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	  Hi Ross!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Hi roomie! 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Man	 Hey Joey, hi! Im Ray; Im the producer of the show.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  Its a pleasure to meet you Ray.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 And this is Duncan  and Erin, theyre gonnahelp us out with the audition. So uh, lets get the camera rolling.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  Rightie-O Ray!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 Whenever youre ready.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  Hello, Im Joey Tribbiani! Lets playBamboozled! Erin, you get the first question! In hockey, who is known as The Great One?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Erin	 Wayne Gretzky.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Correct! Now, would you like to pick a Wicked Wango card or spin the Wheelof Mayhem?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 Uh Joey, didnt your agents give you the revised rules? Weveeliminated all of that. No wheel, no cards.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 WhatWhy?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 Uh well, the game was too complicated and research showed peopledidnt follow it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Well whats complicated? You spin the Wheel of Mayhem to go up theLadder of Chance. You go past the Mud Hut through the Rainbow Ring to get to the GoldenMonkey; you yank his tail and boom! Youre in Paradise Pond!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 Yeah all thats gone. Its basically just a simple question andanswer game now.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	 Well whats fun about that? You expect me to be the host of a boringgame thats just people standing around answering questions?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ray	 Well, therell be women in bikinis holding up the scores.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Joey	  Lets play Bamboozled!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 and all those dinosaur nick-knacks you have Ross, I thoughtthey might be more at home in the garage.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Well wewe dont have a garage.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Did I say garage? I meant garbage.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Yknow what? Maybe, Mrs. Green, its not absolutely vital thatyou live with us.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Well Rachel needs help with the baby.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 I do. I really do. I dont know anything.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Im-Im sure thats not true.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Oh no? Pheebs? Monica? Do I know anything about babies?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 No, not a thing.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Its frightening.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Well uh, yknow what? Even if she doesnt know anything, I do! Ihave a son. And his mother and I didnt live together, and whenever he was with me Itook care of him all the time, by myself.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Thats true. You do have another child.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Yeah.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 With another woman. Have you no control Ross?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Thats a different issue. Uh, the point is, when the baby comes Iwill be there toto feed her and bathe her and change her. And more than that I wantto do all those things.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Well then you really dont need me to live with you.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Yes! Yes, youre gonna be so missed.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Youre gonna be a great father.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Well youre gonna be a wonderful grandma. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Hello?! I still dont know what the hell Im doing!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Oh, come on, every first time mother feels that way.Youllyoure gonna pick it up.  Hey!You will! Uh look, yknow when you first came to the city? You were this spoiledhelpless little girl who-who still used daddys credit card. Do you remember?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 I hope youre going somewhere with this.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Look at you! WhatYoure-youre this big executive! You aremuch more capable than you give yourself credit for. I-I have no doubt youre gonnabe an incredible mother. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Really?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Im telling you.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Thank you. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 All right you two, Im gonna get going.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Oh. 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Oh no-no-no-no sweetheart, you stay put. Ill let myself out.Its like Im not here, which I almost wasnt.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	  Youre still so funny. Youre so funny. What do I do?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Nothing! You have apologized to her like a million times and shesbeen nothing but terrible to you. And dont forget you just threw her daughtera lovely, albeit slightly boring, shower, and she hasnt even thanked you forit.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yknow what? Youre-youre right.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Yeah I mean if you want to say anything to her, Id tell her off.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Really?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 Uh-huh!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Okay! I will! Mrs. Green? Mrs. Green!  It is rude to leave a party withoutsaying good-bye to the host! Yeah, and-and also when someone apologizes to you the decentthing to do is to accept it! Now what I did to you, it wasnt on purpose! But whatyoure during to me now is just plain spiteful!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Mrs. Green	 Spiteful?!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Thats right! Maybe its time you took a good hard look at amirror young ladyold ladylady!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	  Wrap it up, wrap it up, wrap it up
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 So whenever youre ready to apologize to me, I will forgive you.Good day!  I cant feel my legs!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 You were fantastic! Im so proud of you!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yeah? Im proud of me too.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 You should be!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Yeah could-could-could you get me something to drink?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Phoebe	 You got it!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Monica	 Okay.  Mrs. Green! Okay Im really sorry!! Im apologizing for the  Okay, I bit my tongue, but Im stillreally sorry!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	  Okay! Im ready.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 You sure?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Yes, Ive done my studying and I really know my stuff.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 All right then.  Rachel Green!Lets play Bamboozled!  How do you test the temperature ofthe babys bath water?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Uh, put your elbow in it.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Excellent! How do you put a baby down for a nap?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Full, dry, on its back, and no loose covers.
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Thats correct! This is an audio question, what do you do when thebaby makes this sound? 
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 Check if its wet, check if its hungry, burp it!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Excellent! Excellent, now-now do you want another question or a WickedWango card?
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Rachel	 A card! A card! I pick a card!
08	20	0820	The One With The Baby Shower	Ross	 Oh, Im sorry youve been Bamboozled! Youre gonna be aterrible mother!  Ive lost sight of why weredoing this! 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Hey you guys I got some bad news. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Well thats no way to sell newspapers. Why dont you try,"Extra! Extra! Read all about it!"
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 No, Monicas restaurant got a horrible review in the Post.  I didnt want her to see it, so I ran around the neighborhood and bought allthe copies I could find. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Man, this is bad! And Ive had my share of bad reviews. I stillremember my first good one though.  "Everything else in this production of OurTown was simply terrible. Joey Tribbiani was abysmal."
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	  Hey!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Hey.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	  Oh my God! Look at all the newspapers!It must be a good review! Is it great?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Umm
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	  Oh dear God!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 But the good news is, no one in a two-block radius will ever know.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 What about the rest of Manhattan?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Yeah, they all know.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Oh my God, this is horrible!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Im so sorry.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Im so humiliated!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Yeah but yknow what they say Mon, "Theres no such thingas bad press."
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 You dont think that umm,  "The chefs Mahi Mahiwas awful awful," is bad press?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 I didnt write it.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Is he right? Am I reallyAm I awful?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	All	 No!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah Monica! You listen to me, okay? And Im not just sayingthis because Im your friend, Im sayin it cause its thetruth. Youre food is abysmal!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Ross!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  What?! What?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 I am freaking out!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Are ya?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 My due date is in one week! 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 What are you doing up?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 That is seven days!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Okay look, I had a lot of water before I went to bed. Can we do thisafter
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	  No-no-no-no-no Ross! Please, come on we do not haveany of the big stuff we need! We do not a changing table! We do not have a crib! We do nothave a diaper service!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Its funny you should mention diapers.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Im serious.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Okay look, theres nothing to worry about. We have plenty of time.Theres a great baby furniture store on west 10th. Tomorrow, we will gothere and we will get you everything that you need. Okay?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Okay. Thank you. Thats great. Thank you. Wait-wait! Where on west10th? Because theres this really cute shoe store that has like thislittle
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  Okay. Okay. If uh, if youre gonna do this, thenIm gonna do that.  So 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	  Oh, wait Ross! Im sorry, one more thing!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  Yeah!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Umm, our situation. Yknow umm, what we mean to each other. And Imean we-were having this baby together, and we live together. Isnt that,isnt that weird?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	   Well uh
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Im just kidding! You can go pee! 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	  Hey uh Monica, I cant remember. Did we say we were gonnameet here or at the movies?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 We said at the movies, but
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Okay, Ill see you there.  
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Joey!  Now that youre here
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Sure, I can hang out til I have to meet ya.  WhatuhHow come youre not going?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 I have a job interview I have to get ready for.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 I thought you already have a job.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 And people say you dont pay attention. No, this is a much betterjob. Its vice-president of a company that does data reconfiguration and statisticalfactoring for other companies.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Wow! How do you know how to do that?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Thats what I do now.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Hey Joey, come taste this.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 What is it?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Remember that guy that gave me a bad review? Well  Im getting my revenge!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 You cooked him?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 No. He teaches a course on food criticism at the New School, so beforewe go to the movies I wanna go by there and make him try my bouillabaisse again. Oh, Icannot wait to read the front page of the Post tomorrow! "Restaurant reviewer admits:I was wrong about Monica."
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 The front page? You really do live in your own little world,dont ya?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 Do you uh, want these things delivered Mr. and Mrs. Geller?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Oh.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No-no-no! No, no, no, were not married.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 We are having a baby together, but were not involved.  I mean, uh we-we were seeing each other a whileago, but then we were just friends. And then there was one drunken night.  Or, yes stranger, wed like this delivered please.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 Why dont you fill out this address card. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Oh, okay.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 I notice you picked out a lot of our dinosaur items.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Actually, thats one of the reasons why were not acouple.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 I chose those, Im a paleontologist.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 Really?! That is so cool!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh. Oh yeah, dont get to worked up over it. I mean it-it soundslike hes a doctor, but hes not.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 Oh no-no, Im fascinated by paleontology. Have you read the newWalter Alvarez book?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Yeah! I-I teach it in my class.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh my God! Im standing at a cash register, holding a credit card,and Im bored.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	  Oh, I love your neighborhood.Theres a great gym right around the corner from your building.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Thats my gym.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Cashier	 I can tell you work out.  A paleontologist who works out, youre like Indiana Jones. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 I am like Indiana Jones.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Hi Pheebs!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Hey! Oh, how did baby shopping go?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh, it was great! We got everything that we needed! Oh and Ross, almostgot something that wasnt on the list. A whore.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 What?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just startedflirting with him.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Well did she know you two werent married?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Well the idea of a woman flirting with a-with a single man,we-we must alert the church elders!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 You dont understand! You didnt see how brazen she was.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Sounds like youre a little jealous.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No! Im not! I-I-I just think its wrong! Its-itsthat ImHere I am about to pop and hes out picking up some shop girl atSluts R Us!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Is that a real place?  Are they hiring?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  Hey Phoebe!  Fatty!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Hey Chandler, why so fancy?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Well, I got a job interview. Its kinda a big deal too. Its a lotmore money and Id be doing data reconfiguration and statistical factoring.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Wait, I think I know someone who does that.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Me! I do that. So Seriously, do I look okay? Im littlenervous.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh yeah! You reallyYou look great.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Yeah, just dont get your hopes up.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Why not?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Well, the interview
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 What about it?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Yknow! You dont make a very good first impression.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  What?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Oh you dont know.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Are you serious?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Yes, when I first met you, you were like, "Blah, blah, blah."I was like, shhh!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 What is it that I do?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Well its just like youre trying too hard. Always makingjokes, yknow, you justYou come off a little needy.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  Did you like me when we first met?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Chandler, Im not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away fromyou. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Hi! Umm, Im Monica Geller, Im the chef at Alessandros.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Food Critic	 Still?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 I think the things that you said about me are really unfair, and I wouldlike for you to give my bouillabaisse another chance.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Food Critic	 I dont see any reason why I would do that to myselfagain.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Either eat it, or be in it.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Spoon?  So, what do you think?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Food Critic	 Im torn, between my integrity and my desire to avoid abeating. But I must be honest, your soap is abysmal. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Thata girl! Huh? We should get out of here; theres a new classcomin in.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Welcome to introduction to cooking. Now, before we start,can anyone tell me the difference between a hollandaise sauce and a bearnaise sauce? 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 I can.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Okay, go ahead.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Well umm, they both have a egg yolk and butter base, but a bearnaise hasshallots, shirvel, and most importantly tarragon. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Thats very good, whats your name?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Monica.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Monica, you go to the head of the class.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Okay. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 All this stuff takes up a lot of room. Hey how uh, how serious are youabout keeping Ben in your life?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 My son? Pretty serious.  Oh hey Katie!  What uh, what are you doing here?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Well, the delivery went out to you and I realized they forgot this. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Ah, mustve been fairly obvious since it was the only thing left inyour store.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Listen, to be honest, home deliveries are really a part of my jobdescription.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Oh. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Oh uhI actually came here to ask you out.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Oh! Wow! Uh, yeah! That sounds great. Im just gonna put this  back in my pocket, pretend that didnt happen. Uh yeah, actuallyIm free now. Do you wanna grab some coffee or
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Sure!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Horny bitch.  No! Youre a horny bitch! Noooo! Youre thehorny bitch! No! Youre a horny bitch!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 So you guys go, have a really good time.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  Yeah, Im just gonna grab my coat. And uh, and my whip. Yknow because of the Indiana Jones?  Not-notbecause Im-Im into S&M.  Imnot-Im not into anything weird. Yknow? Just-just normal sex.  So, Im gonna grab my coat. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 So, you had a good day huh? Big commission; picked up a daddy.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Are you okay with this?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh yeah! Yeah please, you guys have fun.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Okay. It was nice to see you.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh and it was great to see you too. And you look fantastic, although youmissed a button.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Katie	 Oh umm, actually I umm
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh okay, I see what youre doing there.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 I cant even believe this! I really come off that badly?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Oh! Its okay, you calm down after a while and then people can seehow really sweet and wonderful you really are.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Oh good. Good, because Im sure this interview is gonna last acouple of weeks.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 All right, dont freak out! Okay? I-I will help you. Howlong before you have to leave?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 An hour.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 I cant help you.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Phoebe!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 All right, all right, well just do our best. Okay? So letssay Im the interviewer and Im meeting you for the first time. Okay. "Hi!Come on in, Im uh, Regina Philange."
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Chandler Bing.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Bing, what an unusual name.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Well you should meet my uncle, Bada.  Ill let myself out.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Hi.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Your Fettuccini Alfredo looks a little dry, did you use allyour cheese?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 When you say used, do you mean eat as a pre-cooking snack?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 And the cream?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Cheese makes me thirsty.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Okay. Lets move on.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 All right.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	  Oh! Something smells good over at Monicasstation!  Oh my God! This is absolutely amazing!Youve never made this before?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Oh no! I dont know anything about cooking. I had to ask someonewhat its called when the, when the water makes those little bubbles.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Well, hats off to the chef.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 I-I-Im sorry, your-your mouth was full, I didnt hear whatyou said. Umm, hats off to who now?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 The chef!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Thats right.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 I think youll find if I come to work here, I dontmicro-manage. I dont shy away from delegating.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Um-hmm, thats good to know. But lets stop focusing on whatyou dont do, and start focusing on what you do do.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  What I do dois manage to uh, create anatmosphere of support for the people working with me.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 I see. Nice sidestep on the do do thing by the way.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Hardest thing Ive ever done in my life.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 You gotta go!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Oh! 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Okay, dont worry. Youre ready.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Really?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Phoebe	 Absolutely! Just fight all your natural instincts and youll begreat.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Okay.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Ah Monica, my star student.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Yknow, you called me that before so I-I took the liberty offashioning a star out of aluminum foil. Now, no pressure, you like my cookies, you give methe star. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	  Oh, yum-yum-yum.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Wow! A star!  I know you all hate me and-andIm sorry, but I dont care.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Okay Joey, youre up next. This are good! This is amazing! You get an A!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 I can an A? In-in school?  Hey, Im a dork.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Joey! Im so proud of you!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 I think you should give him your star.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Excuse me? He doesnt even know what hes doing!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Were all beginners here. Nobody knows whattheyre doing.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 I do! Im a professional chef!  Oh relax!Its not a courtroom drama!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 If youre a professional chef, what are you doingtaking Introduction to Cooking?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Yeah!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Im-Im sorry, its just that umm Well I-I cook atthis restaurant, Alessandros, and umm I just got a really bad review
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Oh Alessandros! I love that place!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 You do?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Oh yes! Youre an excellent chef! As a personyoure a little
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Oh, Im totally crazy, but you-you like the food?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Very much.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Okay then, I dont stink. Im a good chef. Okay. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont want to go. Im having fun.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Cooking Teacher	 Well actually, did either of you pay for this class?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Hey-hey-hey, if my friend says its time to go, its time to go.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 also I was the point person on my companys transition fromthe KL-5 to GR-6 system.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 You mustve had your hands full.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 That I did. That I did.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 So lets talk a little bit about your duties.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  My duties?  All right.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 Now youll be heading a whole division, so youllhave a lot of duties.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  I see.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 But therell be perhaps 30 people under you so you candump a certain amount on them.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  Good to know.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 We can go into detail
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 No dont I beg of you!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 All right then, well have a definite answer for you onMonday, but I think I can say with some confidence, youll fit in well here.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	  Really?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 Absolutely.  You can relax; you didgreat.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Yeah I gotta say thank you, I was really nervous. YknowIve been told I come on to strong, make to many jokes, and then it was really hardto sidestep that duty thing.  Duties.  Duties!  Poo. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 Poo?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Oh my God this doesnt count! Okay? The interview was over, thatwas the real Chandler Bing in there, this is just some crazy guy out in the hall! Callsecurity! Theres a crazy guy out in the hall!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Interviewer	 Poo?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Chandler	 Ill look forward to your call. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Hey.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Hi! Youre back from your date!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 How are you?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Im fine, but thats not important. Whats important ishow was she?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Uhh, it was fun. We, we just had coffee.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Whats uh, whats going on? Do you not, do you not like Katie?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No! No, shesShe was nice. I mean, shes a littleslutty, but who isnt?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 I liked her.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called youIndiana Jones!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Did you get like a fresh batch of pregnancy hormones today?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No! Its just that, Kate bothered me. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Why? What was wrong with her?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 There was nothing wrong with her! All right? She was perfectly lovely!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Okay, so whats the matter?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 I dont want you to date her!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  Why? What, what are you jealous?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Yes! And not because I want you to go out with me, but because Idont want you to go out with anybody! Okay? I know its a terrible thing toeven think this, and its completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at myconstant beck and call 24 hours a day! Im very sorry, but that is just the way thatI feel.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Okay.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 What?!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 I wont date. Ill uh, Ill be here, with you, all thetime.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Really? But Im being so unreasonable.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 True, but youre allowed to be unreasonable. Youre having ourbaby.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	  Oh Ross, thank you. Thank you. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Do you feel better?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No, not really. Youre pressing the baby into my bladder and now Ihave to pee. Sorry. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Uh Rach?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Yeah. 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Just one thing umm
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Uh-huh.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 We live together. Youre having our baby. Im not gonna seeanybody else. Are you-are you sure you dont want something more?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	  Wow! I dont know, maybe. Im
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Oh-oh, Rach! I was just messin around!  Like youdid last night when I had to pee?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	  I knew that! I knew that! I was just messin with you too!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	  Okay. Okay. Because for a minute you said you
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Oh no-no-no-no, no!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 that you actually
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 No thats justThats just causeIm such a good messer!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 Rach?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Yeah?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Ross	 The bathroom?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Rachel	 Right! 
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Well I had a great time! Learned how to bake, ate great food, thatsthe first A Ive gotten since seventh grade, and I didnt have to sleepwith the teacher this time.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Oh, look! Acting for Beginners! Want to feel good about yourself?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 What the hell!
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Monica	 Okay.
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	The Acting Teacher	 All right, lets start with some basics. Can anybodytell me what the difference between upstage and downstage is?
08	21	0821	The One With The Cooking Class	Joey	 Yeah, this was a stupid idea. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Hey! What are you guys looking at?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Oh, its a poster for that World War I movie that Im in, checkit out.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yeah? Wow! It looks really violent!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Uh-huh! I know. Im coming soon to a theater near you! Im inTHX! Im unsuitable for children!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Now I cannot wait to see this.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, its already generating Oscar buzz.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 I started that!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 I thought I did! Oh hey guess what? The premiere is next week andyoure all invited! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Are we gonna take a limo?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Sure! Why not?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Oh I love taking limos when nobody died!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Well obviously I wont be able to come, for those of you whohavent checked their calendars today is my due date. Well yknow, I just wantto take a moment and thank you guys for how great youve been during this time. Ireally couldnt have done it without you. And I have loved these last ninemonths! And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna missbeing pregnant.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Thats right, still no baby!  Come on people! Please make some room!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Uh sweetie, maybe youd be more comfortable here? 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 You. Like you havent done enough.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Look, I-I know how miserable you are, I wish there was something I can do.I mean I wish I were a seahorse.  Because with seahorses its themale, they carry the babies. And then also umm, Id be far away in the sea. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 God.  I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Oh I know, Ive been there. I remember toward the end
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  Oh Phoebe, thats a great story. Can you tell itto me when youre getting me some iced tea?   Oh God, get out! Get out!! Get out!! Get out!!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Lets. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Hey! Did you have the baby yet?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Do you want me to come over there and sit on you? Cause Illdo it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 What are you doing here so early?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 They sent me home from work. They were like, "Start your maternityleave now! Just rest, get ready for the baby." Well yknow what? Screw em!If they dont want me there, Ill just hang out with you guys.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Or you can do volunteer work.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Hello?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Estelle	 Joey! Its Estelle! Great news, I was able to get you and oneguest tickets to your premiere.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 One guest? You told me I can have six tickets!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Estelle	 Well, I sold four of them on Ebay. Youll be sitting nextto HotGuy372.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Oh my God. So thats it?! I only get to bring one guest?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Estelle	 Yeah, what time do you wanna pick me up?  Hello?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	  Did you hear that? I only get one extraticket to my premiere. So some how I have to pick between you three and Ross.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  What-what about me?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 You said you didnt want to go.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 I dont. But I would still like to be acknowledged. What? Justbecause Im pregnant you think Im invisible.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Definitely not invisible.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Well, well Ross didnt care enough to be here, so I think hesout. You snooze you lose.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Hes not snoozing, hes teaching a class.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Well then somebodys snoozing. Joey, not that this uh should affectyou at all, but if you were to pick me, I was planning on wearing a sequined dress, cutdown to here. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 I havent seen this dress.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Star in a movie.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Joey, you pick who ever you want. Okay? You just listen to your heart.What does it tell you?  Phoebe, Phoebe.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Well uhI think I want to take Chandler.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Phoebe-Phoebe-Phoebe-PhoebeBurrrrr! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 You really want to take me?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Yeah! Yeah! I mean Im sorry, I wish I can take everybody, butyknow Chandler always supported my career. Hes paid for acting classes andhead shots and stuff and well this will be my way of paying you back.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 So youre never actually going to pay me back?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Wait a minute, just because he paid for your head shots youregonna take him? Joey, I dont think youre comprehending just how slutty thisdress is!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Its not just the stuff he paid for, I mean its-itseverything. Yknow? He read lines with me. He-he went with me on auditions when I wasreally nervous, and then he consoled me after I didnt get parts that I reallywanted. You always believed in me man. Even, even when I didnt believe in myself.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 I always knew you were gonna make it. Im so proud of you.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Thanks. That means a lot to me.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Mon, maybe one of these guys wants to wear your dress.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	  Im gonna go shave. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	  Yeah well, Im gonna go spit. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh, I have to pee. If I dont come out in five minutes itsbecause Ive choked to death on the potpourri stink. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 When she comes out, you hold her nose, Ill blow in her mouth, andthe kid will just  right out of her.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Shes over a week late! She gotta have it today, right?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 I dont know. I-I think its still gonna be a while.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Hmm, care to make it interesting? Ill bet you that shellhave it by this time tomorrow.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Youre on!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Okay, how much?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 One hundred thousand dollars!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 How about fifty bucks?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Fine! Ill call Zurich and move some money around.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  All right, whos turn is it to help meget up!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 No ones here!  Oh damnit!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 This is so exciting! Its so glamorous! People taking ourpicture. How do I look?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 A little tall.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 What?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Do you mind crouching down a little bit, so that I look taller?  There you go. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Its just so glamorous.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Oh hey Mon? Rach is here! Ohh, youre still pregnant. Oh, Imsorry. I know how uncomfortable you are. Yknow what? You look great. Yeah, likefifty bucks.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh, I have to go pee. Apparently this baby thinks that my bladder is asqueeze toy. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Damnit! Damnit!! Heres your fifty bucks! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Its interesting that you lost. Now, I forget, do you like to lose?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Now stop it! Double or nothing that she has it by tomorrow!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Fine! Youre on!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Okay.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Until then, General Grant, why dont you set up camp  right there.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	  Hey is Rachel here? We have a doctors appointment.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Shes in the bathroom.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Rach, we gotta go.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 In a minute!!!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 People ask me why were not together, I just dont know what totell them.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  All right, all right. Lets go!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Uh, do you wanna go change first? The doctors keeping the officeopen late for us, but if you hurry
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 No, Im fine.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Really? You dont think thats a little inappropriate.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Good God man dont anger it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. For the first time in weeks, I amsomewhat comfortable.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Fine! Fine! Yknow what? Whatever you want. Okay? Youre themommy.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh uh-uh pal! Dont call me mommy! Its bad enough you callyour own mother that. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Im actually with her on this one.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	  "I thought I knew who the enemy was, but it was you allalong." 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	  Okay, this is it. Its my big fight scene coming up.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Ross.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yeah?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Can I ask you something?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Uh-huh.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 When Carol was pregnant with Ben
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Mmm?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 were you this irritating?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Wow!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Excuse me?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Oh nothing. Nothing! Just uh, youve been a little short with melately. Im not trying to irritate you.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Well then you just must have a natural talent for it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yknow what? The doctor will be in soon, why dont we not speakuntil then.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  Okay.  Seriously, breathe louder Ross! Thatsgreat!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yknow we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how todeliver a baby thats half human and half pure evil!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Hi Dr. Long, how are you?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	  Oh, youre nice to her.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 She has the drugs!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 Well do a quick check.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Okay. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 So, eight days late huh?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 You must be a little uncomfortable.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Eh, just a tad.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 Youre about 80 percent effaced, so youre on your way. Itstill could last a little while longer. If youre anxious there are a few ways tohelp things along.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Do them!!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 Actually, theyre things you can do. Just some home remedies, butin my experience Ive found that some of them are quite effective.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Well, we are ready to try anything.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 Okay, theres an herbal tea you can drink.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Okay.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 You can take some caster oil, theres eating spicy foods
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Great! We will do all of those.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Dr. Long	 taking a long walk, and then theres the one thatsproved most effective: sex.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Youve got to be kidding me!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Good job Joe! Well done! Top notch!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 You liked it? You really liked it?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Oh-ho-ho, yeah!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Which part exactly?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 The whole thing! Can we go?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Oh no-no-no, give me some specifics.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 I love the specifics, the specifics were the best part!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Hey, what about the scene with the kangaroo? Did-did you like that part?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 I was surprised to see a kangaroo in a World War I epic.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 You fell asleep!! There was no kangaroo! They didnt take any of mysuggestions! Thats for coming buddy. Ill see you later. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Dont go! Im sorry. Im so sorry!  Look! This guy fell asleep! He fell asleep too! Be mad at him! Or, call an ambulance.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Hey!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Hey.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Hi!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 What did the doctor say? Any news on when the baby will come?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 No. But she did give us some ideas on how to induce labor.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yeah, we tried them all. We went for a walk, uh we tried a special tea,caster oil, spicy food nothing has worked.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Well, there is one thing that we havent tried, but someone thinksthat,  "That will open up a can of worms."
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Well what is it? What is it? If its gonna help bring the babyhere, like today. I mean, I think you should do it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Its sex.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Do it!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Monica!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Im just saying its been a really long time for you. I mean,women have needs. Do it, get yours!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Oh I-I dont know about that. No, I think that if the two of youhad sex the-the-the repercussions would be catastrophic. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 All right, lets be practical, if Ross isnt willing to do it,hes not the only guy in the world you can have sex with. You can borrowChandlerChandler is good!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Monica, what is the matter with you?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Nothing. I just want the baby to be born today.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Why? Why today?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Okay fine! I keep betting Phoebe that youre gonna have the babyand I dont want to lose again!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 What?! While shes been going through this hell, youve beenmaking money?! Youre betting on your friend staying in this misery?! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Ill take that bet.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 What?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Well, Im miserable here! I might as well make some money out it!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Can I get some of that action?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Wait a minute! Now Im betting against all three of you?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh honey, dont worry. I really do feel like tomorrows theday.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Oh, okay!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Hey! Sleeping beauty!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Where have you been?! I tried to call you! I want to talk to you! Istill feel so bad!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	  Oh no, were you upset? Did you lose sleep?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Im so sorry.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Uh-huh look, the only reason I can over here was to settle things betweenus! Okay? Youve done a lot for me and my career, I wanted to pay you back so I tookyou to the premiere but you missed it! Okay, so how much do I owe you?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 What?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Give me a number, I dont want to owe you anything!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 You dont owe me anything, I dont want you money
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Ah-ah-ah! Were doing this! Okay, now you got me my first set of headshots. Right, how much were those?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 I dont know, five hundred dollars?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Okay, five hundred dollars. What else?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Well then there was the second set, the infamous booger head shots.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Okay, so thats another five hundred. Five hundred and five hundred,thats 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Do you want a calculator?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Please! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Here! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 All right, what else?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Well uh, there was acting classes, stage combat classes, tapclasses
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Which were still keeping under our hats!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Uh then there was that dialect coach who helped you with that playwhere you needed a southern accent. Which after twenty hours of lessons still came outJamaican. 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 What the hell are you talking about,  "Thesouth will rise again man."
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Yes, money well spent!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Yeah. Okay, what else? Rent!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Chandler	 Okay, two, three years of rent, utilities, food
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Joey	 Okay. Okay, so Im writing you a check forSo you fell asleepduring my movie. Big deal right? How do you clear this thing?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Come on, finish your enchilada.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Ross IWe tried all the spicy food. Its not working.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Okay here, have one of these peppers. Oh ha Oh God! Soso hot! Oh my By the way, you dont want to touch the pepperand then touch your eye.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 I am feeling nothing. Speaking of hot, watching you do that really makesme want to have sex with you.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Stop it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! Weknow whats gonna work! Its doctor recommended!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Im sorry, but we have to have some boundaries! My God, Imdying.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh come on Ross, weve done it before well do it again,itll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 This is insane, Im not gonna make love to you just so thatyoull go into labor.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Make love? What are you a girl?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Always a great way to get in a mans pants.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 But you will, you will be performing a service. Okay? Just-just think ofme as a ketchup bottle, yknow you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it justto get something to come out.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 I love when you talk dirty to me.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh, I know it. Youre right. Thats not sexy. OhOh! Whoops! Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. Let me just bedover and get it.  Oh God!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Okay enough! This is, this is not going to happen.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Come on Ross! Im miserable here! Come on! You started this, nowyou finish it! Come on wuss, make love to me.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Yknow what?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 What?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Forget it.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh wow! What now Ross youre not gonna talk? How on earth will youever annoy me? Oh wait a minute, I know.  I mean youd thinkthe damn jalepeno wouldve cleared up your sinuses, but no!! Thats notenough  What are you doing?!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Im getting that baby out of you!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	  Oh God!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Oh, I know.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Oh no. No-no! I think my water just broke.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 I am good. Okay! Okay! Uh, I got the pillow! I got the bag! You got thekeys?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Okay! I got the keys! Okay! Okay!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Hey!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Yeah.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Were having a baby.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 I didnt uh, really have time to read this part of the books, butdo you think we have time to
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Ross	 Not so much.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Rachel	 Okay.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Two hundred.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Thank you!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Thats it. Im done. I dont care when the baby comes, nomore betting.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Okay.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 Hello?  Uh-huh.  Uh-huh.  Okay.  Iguess we can bet one more time.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Is Rachel having the baby?
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 How did you know that?!  Joey!Chandler!! Its time!
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 Theyre at the coffeehouse.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	 You know everything!! Oh wait, double or nothing. I bet you the baby isover seven pounds.  I bet you it has hair.  I bet you its a girl.
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Phoebe	 We know its a girl! 
08	22	0822	The One Where Rachel Is Late	Monica	  Ill give you really good odds.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 All right!  Yes!! From home to the hospital in underseven minutes! We did it!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Yes, the hard part is truly over.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 No, but come on, were off to a great start arent we? I knewId get you here fast, but this has got to be some kind of a record!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh you made it!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 How are you doing?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wait a minute! How-how the hell did you beat us here?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 We took a cab. Did you guys walk?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 N No! We took a cab too, but I did test runs!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hi!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey! You made it!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay is theresome kind of magic tunnel to this hospital?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross, you stay here and talk, Im gonna go have a baby.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay. Okay.  Umm hi, this is Rachel Green.Im Ross Geller. We-we called from the car.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Right! We have a semi-private labor room waiting for you. So in just aminute
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Im sorry, semi-private? We, we asked for a private room.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Yes, I see that here. Unfortunately we cant guarantee a privateroom and currently theyre all unavailable.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Man, if only youd gotten here sooner. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Im sorry. Semi-private rooms are all we have.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Just give us a second. Ross! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Give her some money.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 I really think theyre out of rooms.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Theyre not!! Ross, theyre just saving them for the importantpeople!! Okay?! What-what if I was the president?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well then wed be in a lot of trouble, you dont know where anycountries are.  Okay.  Uh, say would you umm Would you mind checking again to see if any umm,private rooms may have  opened up?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 This is a hospital.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Okay. Yknow what? Id have to say I reallydont care for your tone. And this is not the only hospital in this city and we haveno problem toWhoa!  Oh gosh! Whoa!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What-what?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ow! Ow! Contraction.  Ow-ow! Ow-ow! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Would you like to see a semi-private room?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, it couldnt hurt to look.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Well youre only two centimeters dilated and we need to get toten. Itll be a while.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Ill be back in an hour to check you again.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thank you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thank you.  Well, I guess we have some time to kill.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, guess so. Whew! Check these out!  Never done this before.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah well it looks great!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Thank you very much.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman	 Thanks.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi! Hi, Im uh Ross. Im here to ruin this magical day for you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Oh no-no, not at all.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman	 Dont worry about it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Marc Coreger, this is my wife Julie.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi Julie.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Hi.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 This is Rachel. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 Oh hi Rachel.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 How are you?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Hi. Is this your first?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah it is.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Well, little Jamie here is our third. So, if you have questions or youneed anything at all, just holler.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thats so sweet.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Umm say, I-I opened this earlier  but let me give youguys some privacy.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 No nonsense! Were all in this together.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Yeah, we are going to share every moment of this with you. And I thinkwere gonna have some fun.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 Yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 Hey! Smile! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh no, I really dont want anyOh!Thank you. Oh. Oh Ross
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Here comes another contraction.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh. Okay, just breathe.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Oh honey, I think Im having one too!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 Look at this!  There we go!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh wow, three hours and still no baby. Ugh, themiracle of birth sure is a snooze fest.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey, you wanna see something?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure! What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Umm, this is going to be fun. Watch me freak out Chandler. Honey?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Listen uh, I-Ive been doing some thinking, and I dont knowwhether its because were here or Rachels giving birth but umm, I thinkwe should try to have a baby.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	  What-what-whats that now?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. Ive been thinking about it too, and I, I think wereready.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?! Are you kidding me?! You-you-you think were ready to have ababy now?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, this is fun.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Youre ready to have a baby? My boys all grown up!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But you said you were ready too.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah but I was just screwing with you to try to get your voice all highand weird like mine is now!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes, but havent you wanted a kid like forever?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, just back off mister! Whoa.  Cause I am readyto have a baby. I just want Joey to be the father.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  What?! Are you crazy?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Thats it! Right there! Is all I wanted!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 I am so sorry. The doctor insisted on closing the curtain for the exam.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, thats veryReally very-very okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Marc	 Julies cervix is dilated a seven centimeters, thats about fourfingers. The doctor let me feel it myself.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Have you felt Rachels cervix Ross?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  No, I dont think well be doingthat.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Were not gonna do that.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Julie	 Well, if you like you can feel Rachels and then feel mine tocompare. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	  Am I interrupting?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh yes! Thank you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh. Oh wait no.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Later.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No-no-dont! Dont leave me here with these people.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh uh, Im sorry. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No Ross! Ross! Ross! My child has no father!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi! Im so glad youre here, but its gonna be a while. I-Iwished youd called first.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Oh thats all right, Im coming back later with yourfather.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh good.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 I actually needed to talk to you before the birth.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay, whats up?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 I brought something that I want to give you, assuming of coursethat you want it. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ma, youre asking me to marry you?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 This is your grandmothers engagement ring, I want you to giveit to Rachel.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Mom no, come on! Thank you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Just hear me out!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 N-no! Okay? Weve been through this! Were not gonna get marriedjust because shes pregnant, okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Honestly! Ross, this isnt just some girl you picked up in abar and humped. A child should have a family.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Mom, yknow what? I-I cant deal with this right now. Imsorry
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Justthink about it. If you dont, Ill talk moreabout humping.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Gimmie! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hi!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Mrs. Geller	 Oh hi dear!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, thank you so much for coming. Ross, get in here!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 she came and dragged me out of the labor room to ask me why Imnot with Rachel.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah.  Why arent you with Rachel?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Are you kidding? Look, were not gonna be together just becausewere having a baby. Okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But yknow what? It just seems that you two belong together.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay, stop it! I cant deal with this right now. I have to go have ababy.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Right. And with who again? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 God. Hes crazy! Why doesnt he want to be with Rachel?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 I mean seriously, shes like the perfect woman. I mean I know sheturned me down, but if she hadnt and wanted to be with me, I would take her in myarms and  I havent bummed you guys out likethis in a while have I?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey. Whos that?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 New people.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What happened to the Disgustingtons?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Theyre having their baby! Its not fair Ross we got herefirst! Right after you left they wheeled her off into delivery. Oh but not before she gaveme a juicy shot of little Jamie just crowning away.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wow! Sorry. So uh, how are the new people?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well they have uh, some unusual pet names for each other. Including umm,evil bitch and uh, sick bastard. Oh God oh! Contraction!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah? Okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ooh! Ow!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 Are you looking at her?! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Sick Bastard	 No!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 Dont you look at her you sick bastard!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Sick Bastard	 Honey I swear! I wasnt looking at her!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 Shes in labor! You like that you sick son of a bitch!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Umm. Umm, Im-Im just gonna
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 See? See? It was because you were looking fat pervert!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 No-no, ImIm sure no one was looking. Just want someprivacy. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 You miss your girlfriend?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Just ignore them.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ross.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hes looking at me.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey! You wanna live to see your baby?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Evil Bitch	 Dont you talk to my husband like that you stupid bastard!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh good God! If you want a baby so bad just go steal it! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 What is going on with you? Since when are you so crazy about babies?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Im not crazy about babies. Im crazy about us.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Look, weve always talked about having babies someday. Imnot saying it has to be right now, but Im starting to think that we can handle it.Were good. Were really good.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 We are pretty good.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But nothing has to happen until your ready.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well maybe Im ready now. I mean, its a little scary, butmaybe its right.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?! Its not right! Were not ready to have a kid now!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Im kidding. This is going to be fun.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 So were gonna try? I mean, are we trying?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Were trying to get pregnant.  Yknow Im not really comfortable doing this in front of the babies.So, when do you want to start trying?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay, hold on a sec.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Period math?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, we could start trying. Now.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Right here?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 No, not here. Maybe here.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Wait a minute, its perfect. We got a lot of time to kill andwere in a building thats full of beds!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 And its so clean!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Come on you stupid machine! Come on!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, it ate your money?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  No.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right, Ill see you downstairs then.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey I got one! I got one!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Hi!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hi.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Oh uh, up or down?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh down please.  I-Ihate to be a ball buster can I just do it? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Could you press up too please?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure! I feel so bad for you; I broke my leg once too.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Oh yeah? Howd yours happen?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well, its a long story. Its kind of embarrassing. Letsjust say there was a typographical error with a sex manual.  How aboutyou?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Car accident.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Oh, let me guess some idiot on a cell phone wasnt paying attention?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Yeah. Me.  Oh hey, thats me.  Hey uh, I take it youre just visiting someone.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Uh-huh, yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Well umm, if you have sometime yknow and maybe you might want tovisit someone else
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh yeah! I-I would like that.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Im in the middle 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Wait! What?! No!! Elevator!! No!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  Uh, you gotta press the button. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 The nurse said theyre bringing in another woman.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ugh, is she pregnant yet? She doesnt need to be; shell stillhave the baby before I do. Oh Ross, another contraction! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Thats it. Thats it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman	 Oooh, that sounded like a bad one.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah it was.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman	 Mine havent been so bad. Oh! Here comes one now.  Oh, that was a big one!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Excuse me? Could you help me with something? The patientIm looking for has a broken leg and is in a wheelchair. And umm, hes likeearly to mid-thirties, very attractive.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 I think I know who youre talking about.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh yay! Great! Okay, what room number is he in?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Im sorry, that information is restricted to hospital staff
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  Uh, shes with me.  Dr. Drake Remoray.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Dr. Drake who?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Remoray. Its Portuguese. We need that information; Im adoctor.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 A doctor at this hospital?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Damnit woman were losing precious time! Now do you want thismans blood on your head?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hands.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hands! It is absolutely essential that you tell me what room the man myassistant described is staying in. Hes a patient of mine, Ive been treatinghim for years!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 Hes in room 816.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 816, thank you! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Thank you. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 And what is his name?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  No! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 I think we found a place.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Umm, wait! Do you want to set the mood a little?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay. Uh, well dim the lights, dim the lights.  Orturn them out all together. Uh, no scented candles. Okay here. Here we go. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay! Okay! Make me sterile, but okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay. Lets hurryOh wait! Do we have a condom?  Oh right! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yes, 98.6. Youre gonna be fine.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ooh, this is it!  Oh, thats him! Thatshim!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Great! Go get him.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Wait a second, or maybe you can go in first.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hes not really my type.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No not you, Dr. Drake Remoray. You can ask him questions and seewhats he like. People tell doctors everything.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 But you said he was this great guy!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 But lately all the guys I meet seem really nice at first, then they turnout to be the biggest jerks.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 You do attract some stinkers.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Dr. Long, Ive been at this for seventeen hours! Three women havecome and gone with their babies, you gotta give me some good news! How many centimeters amI dilated? Eight? Nine?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Three.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Just three?! Im dilated three!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 We are moving along, just slowly. Dont worry, youre doing great. Ill be back soon. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hey, yknow what? Im not waiting! Im gonna push thisbaby out! Im doing it! I mean its what? Three centimeters? Thats gottabe like this! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Actually its more like this. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh stupid metric system!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Doctor	 Oh my. Were gonna need to take you straight to the delivery room.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh for the love of God! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman Giving Birth	  Its coming! Itscoming!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Doctor	 And here it is! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh come on!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hi! Im Dr. Drake Remoray and I have a few routine questions I needto ask you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Really? Ive been dealing with Dr. Wells.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know, but Im a neurologist. And just to be on the safe side, Dr.Wells wanted a more comprehensive overview of you status so he sent me.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Dr. Wells is a woman.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 That was a test. Good response. All right, full name.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	 Clifford Burnett.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Date of birth? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 November 16th, 1968.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Age?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Cant you figure that out based on my date of birth?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Im a doctor Cliff, not a mathematician.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Im 33.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay. And uh, are you married.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 No.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh really? So, 33 and still single, would you say you have commitmentissues?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Are all the questions this personal?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  Yes.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Well uh if you must know Im a widower.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh thats terrible. Im-Im really sorry.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Yeah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hmm. Do you sleep with women and never call them again?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 No.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Excellent! Excellent! And uh, finally, are you into any weird stuffyknow, sexually?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 No!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oooh, wrong answer. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	  This rooms available.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay! Okay wait! You listen to me! You listen to me! Since I have beenwaiting four women, thats four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I amdilated, have come and gone with their babies! Im next! Its my turn! Itsonly fair! And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me Im going tosue you! Not this hospital, Im going to sue you! And my husband hes a lawyer!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh Rach
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Go get back on that case honey!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Nurse	 I dont think the next patient is very far along.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay, well then bring her in.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Woman	 OH.MY.GAWD!!! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 I.cant.believe this!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 And yet somehow its true!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 I mean this is so great! Were gonna be baby buddies! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Squeeze your legs together and cover the babys ears!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Man	  Hi sweetie!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Hi! Hi sweetheart! This is my husband Sid, I dont thinkyouve met him. Ross, Rachel, this is Sid. I nabbed him a year ago at thedermatologists office. Thank God for adult acne huh? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Sid	 I still cant believe it! Im the luckiest guy in the world!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Really?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Sid	  Whatd he say?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh yknow what? You have to speak very loudly when youretalking to Sid, because hes almost completely deaf.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh there you go!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I get it!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 So? Congratulations you two, I didnt even know you got married.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh we-we didnt.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 No-no. We
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 What?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Um uhWere-were just having this baby together but uh, uhthats all.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Why?!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh well ummwere just not in that place, yknow? Butwere very excited about this.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh. Well then shut me up. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Just tell me how.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Uh-oh, I feel another one coming. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Sid you lucky deaf bastard.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What else? What else?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, well hes 33.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh. Ah-uh.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 A widower.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 He seemed like a stand up guy. Oh, and hes not into anything weirdsexually.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Enter Pheebs.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Should we tell Rachel theres an empty private room right nextdoor to hers?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 We could, or we can have sex in it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well let me think about that, while I remove my pants!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	  Okay mister! Fertilize me!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Does that sound like Janice?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 If its not, then theres two of them. And that would meanits the end of the world!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hey!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hi.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh hi.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 I cant believe this is taking so long. How are you doing?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh not bad. Do you know that feeling when youre trying to blow aSaint Bernard out your ass?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Weirdest thing. Did I hearMother of God its true!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Chandler Bing!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Jan-Janice!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Not just Janice, Janice in labor, contracting and everything.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh, this should be easy. I have a very wide pelvis. You rememberChandler.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Janice I didnt even know you were pregnant! Whos theunwitting human whos essence youve stolen?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Its you. This is yours.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	  Look how nervous he gets! We havent slept together inyears! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Thats funny. Does it-does it hurt? Does the labor hurt?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay Ive got one for you, if you had too which one would yourather eat, a seeing eye dog or a talking gorilla?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Id have to saythe talking gorilla, because at least I canexplain to him that youre making me eat him.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Somebody went to college. Wow.  What is it?Im sorry. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 No, Im sorry. Its just my foot itches like crazy.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, Ill get it. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Wow! I usually get to know a girl a little better before I let her spoonme.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Relax, its not like were forking.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh thats five Ross. Five women have had five babies! And I havehad no babies! Why doesnt she want to come out?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yknow what I think it is? I think youve made such a nice homefor her over the last nine months that she just doesnt want to leave.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh. Look at you making up crap for me. Oh God! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Twenty-one hours, youre a hero.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Doctor you gotta do something! I think you gotta give me drugs or yougotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Actually, I think youre ready to go to the delivery room.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Ten centimeters, youre about to become a mom.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 My God. Okay.  Ha-ha-ha beat ya! Sucker!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Is this the same spoon that was in my cast? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yknow what? This one is. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Oh my God! Thats the doctor who was in my room before!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Huh. Okay, Mr. Perkazet.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 Im telling you! The guy from that show was here in my room, askingme all these weird questions!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Cliff, do you really believe that a character from a TV show was here inyour room?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  Rachels having her baby!!  Which is of no interest to me, Im a neurologist.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 That-thats him! You know him?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay. Okay. IOkay ummthisI-I sent my friend Joey inhere to find out stuff about you. Umm yknow, if it helps you came off great. A lotbetter than Im coming off right now.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 I dont believe this. You got him to pretend he was some fakedoctor?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Fake? Excuse me? Hello? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 And then you tried to make me think that I was crazy.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Youre right, that was wrong. Im sorry. Im so sorry.Its just that I liked you so much. Can we just, can we just start over?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 I dont think so.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, if I may? Umm-umm look, Cliff, you told me a lot of personal stuffabout you, right? And maybe-maybe it would if-if would help if-if you knew some personalstuff about her. Uh, she was married to a gay ice dancer. Uh, she gave birth to herbrothers triplets. Oh! Oh! Her-her twin sister used to do porn!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Uh Joey, were trying to dial down the crazy.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Umm, look we dont, we dont really know each other so itwould be really easy to just forget about this, but there seems to be something betweenus. And I dont know about you but that doesnt happen to me a lot.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Cliff	 It doesnt happen to me either.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Me neither.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Push. Push. Come on push for five seconds. 54
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 3-2-1 oh!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Okay, the next contraction should be in about twenty seconds.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I cant. I cant push anymore, I cant.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Sweetie youre doing great.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh God twenty seconds my ass!!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Here we go! Okay, keep pushing! Wait! I see something.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What? You do? You do?  Oh my God!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Dont say, "Oh my God!" Oh my God what?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 What is that?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Its the babys buttock, shes breech.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh thank God, I thought she had two heads.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh God. Is she gonna be okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Shes gonna be fine. Okay, shes in a more difficultposition so youre gonna have to push even harder now. Go! Push!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Go!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Rachel youre gonna have to push even harder, nothingshappening!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Im sorry, I cant!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes you can!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I cant!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey! Hey! Come on! You can! I know you can do this! Lets go!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I cant. Please, you do it for me.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 No! Come on letsOne more time! One final push! Ready?123! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Good!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Keep pushing!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Are you okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 You have no idea how much this hurts.  Keep going! Keep going!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Here we go!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh! Oh! Shes upside down but shes coming! Shes coming!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh God!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh! Oh my God oh! Oh my God shes here.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh shesshes perfect.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, shes so tiny.  Whered she go?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh its okay. Theyre just-theyre just wrapping her up.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay. Well be careful with her, shes really tiny.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Here she is!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh hey you. Thanks for coming out of me.  I know. Oh.Yeah. Oh, shes looking at me. Hi! I know you.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Do we have a name yet?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, not yet.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Dr. Long	 Thats fine, for now well just call her Baby Girl Green.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh no, Baby Girl Geller-Green.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hello baby girl.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Can we come in?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, come in.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Hi!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 There she is!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, shes so beautiful.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Here. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God! Shes amazing. Oh, oh Im so glad you guys gotdrunk and had sex!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Its incredible, I mean one minute shes inside you and then47 hours later here she is.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	  She looks so real!  Yknowwhat I mean! Shes this whole tiny little person. She already has eyelashes and kneesanduh-oh.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh no-no, no for I second there I counted six fingers, but one was fromthe other hand so were good.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Okay, my turn. My turn.  Oh! Youre socute! Oh, I could squeeze your little head!  I wont.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Whats the matter?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh nothing I Sorry, I just cant stop crying.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 The doctor says its completely normal with all the hormones. Plus,you-youre sleep deprived.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 So? You guys are all sleep deprived. I dont see you weepingbecause you put your slippers on the wrong feet. Oh God. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Whats the matter now?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I was reliving it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ohhh. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So, do you know what youre gonna call her yet?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, wait a minute its not gonna be Baby Girl? I thought that wasso original! 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh actually, we-weve narrowed it down to two names.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, and yknow what? I love them both, so why dont you justpick one and thatll be it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wow! Umm, okay uheveryonethisis Isabella.  What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thats not her name! Im sorry, she just doesnt feellike an Isabella.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 So then I guess Ferdinad is out.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 What was the other one Ross?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Umm, Delilah.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh great! Suddenly she sounds like a biblical whore.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 So I guess were back to uh, Baby Girl.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yay!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well what are we going to do?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Its okay honey, youll find a name.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ugh, easy for you to say, you already know what your kids names are goingto be.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You do?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, Ive had them picked out since I was fourteen.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh no, its gonna be named after some snack or baked goodisnt it?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well tell us! What are they?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Umm, okay. If its a boy its Daniel.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And if its a girl?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 I dont want to say.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, just tell us! Were not gonna want it!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Okay. Its Emma.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Emma!  See? I dontwant it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Take it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Its clearly an Emma.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh honey, but you love that name.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, but I love you more. Besides yknow, nothing goes with Bing.So Im screwed. I mean  Oh, hi Emma. Yeah,thats you. Youre our little Em. Oh whats that honey? What? Oh, you wanta little cousin?  You want a cousin right now?!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That was amazing.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know. Hey, do you realize we may have just changed our lives forever?We may have just started a family. Nine months from now we can be here, having our ownbaby.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And if not, we got to do it on a bucket.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	  Yoo-hoo! Aaron Litman-Neurolic would like to say hello to hisfuture bride.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ohhh!  Wow! He kinda takes yourbreath away doesnt he?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Hes a keeper. How are you feeling?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, Im fine. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Can I just say, I really admire what youre doing. Just raising herall alone.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, Im not doing it alone. I have Ross.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh, sure. Now. But what happens when he meets somebody else and getsmarried?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well then he gets a divorce, its Ross!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Im telling you Rachel, listen to Janice. They all say theyregonna be there until they start their real family.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well IThats never gonna happen with Ross.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh well thats what I thought about my first husband, now Imlucky if my kid gets to spend the weekend with her father and the twins and little Ms. NewBoobs.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Really?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 I hate to be the one to say it, but honey you two  are onyour own.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well ThatsyknowThatsWevebeen alone for the last twenty minutes were doing okay. Besides yknow what?I-IMaybe we wont be alone, cause lately I-Ithings have beenhappening between me and Ross, yknow? Right before I went into labor, we-we had thiskiss. Yknow? So it might be thethe beginning of something.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey Janice!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Oh hi!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Whos this little guy? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Say hello to Aaron, your future son-in-law.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 No-no. No.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Im gonna leave the three of you alone.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Janice	 Bye. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Man! Did you see the kid on that nose?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Uh-huh.  Yknowwhat I was, I was thinking about?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Huh?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ummthat kiss before we left the apartment. That was some-somethinghuh?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah. Yeah, it really was. But wewe gotta be careful. Wewecant let that happen again, yknow?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Right.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 I mean we dont want to go down that road do we?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No! No, of course not. No. Thats why I brought it up.  Theydidnt have any sodas?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God! Im sorry, I was talking to this nurse, completely forgot.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thats all right.  And so it begins.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Is she in there?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah. Shes putting her down now, thats her. 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look at Emma!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I just cant decide who she looks more alike, you or Rachel?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh what are you kidding? Shes gorgeous, its all Rachel.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Im sorry, for the last time, why arent you two togetheragain?  No, I know. I know, because youre not in that place.Which would be fine, except you totally are.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Itsits complicated okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah thats true. Yeah, you love her. You always have. You have achild together. There is no right answer.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Look, weve been together. Okay? And then apart, and then together,and then apart, and now we have a baby.  Its just if-if we got together againand it didnt work outI could never do that to Emma. I mean she-she thinkingeverything Oh thatsnow me. What do they put something inthe water in this place? Since Rachel and I were doing really, were doingreally well right now.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I know. I know. I know. I know, and if you try to make it more you mightwreck it.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, exactly.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Right.  Or you might get everything youve wanted since youwere fifteen.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey. I just saw a woman breast feeding both of her twins at the same time;it is like a freak show up here.  Whats thematter?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Nothing.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 What is it? Hey!
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Really its nothing. Im just
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Rach come on, what?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ive just been thinking about how my baby and I are gonna be allalone.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 What are you talking about alone? What about Ross?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh please, hell be with his real family, the twins and little missnew boobs.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Okay, how long was I watching that woman?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Im just saying that yknow, someday Ross is gonna meetsomebody andhes gonna have his own life. Right?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, I guess so.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I just never thought I would raise this baby all by myself. Pretty dumbhuh?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, listen to me, listen to meyou are never ever gonna bealone. Okay? I promise thats not gonna happen.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Joey. Honey what would I do without you? 
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 You dont have to worry about that okay?
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh, hon can you grab me my other box of tissues? Theyre right onthat chair under Rosss coat.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 Sure.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Okay.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Joey	 My God.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Joey.
08	23-24	0823-24	The One Where Rachel Has A Baby, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Oh my God.  Okay.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Joey.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	  Oh my God.  Okay.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 So uhI guess we shouldmake it official huh?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Uh Look Rach Hey Ross is here! Hey look!Its my good friend Ross. Hey Ross.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hey Joey.  Hey you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Hey you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Hey and look he brought flowers. Thanks Ross, but Im really more ofa candy guy. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Youre weird today.  Listen I uh, wanted to talk to you about something.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Uh yeah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Uh Joey, can you give us just a minute?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh, Im sorry. I meant no.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	  Hi! Hey lookwhos here!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Wheres my granddaughter? Ive been practicing my magictricks.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 He pulled a quarter out of my ear!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hey, wheres uh, wheres mom?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 She went to pick up Aunt Liddy.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Oh, Aunt Liddys coming? That means we get five dollars each!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 So when do I get to meet Emma and show her this? 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Okay. Wow.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Uh Dad, Emmas in the nursery. Ill take you now. If you want,but  I really want to talk to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I know, I still need to talk to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh hey but, before you guys do that  I need to talk to you, andRoss, I need to talk to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	  Oh and I need to talk to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 About what?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 To see if know what these guys are talking about.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Isnt she beautiful?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Look at her, my first grandchild.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What about Ben?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Well of course Ben, I meant my first granddaughter.  Wow.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	  Have umm, have you thought anymore about you andRachel?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Oh well yeah, actually I was going to talk to her when you guys all camein the room.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Yay! Its so exciting! Wow, you couldve done that with usthere.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Yeah right.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh sure okay, you can touch yourself in front of us but you canttalk to Rachel.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?! When have I ever touched myself in front of you guys?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh please! Just before when you were asleep in the lounge! That Armenianfamily was watching you instead of the TV. Oh, that reminds me. That Mr. Hasmeje still hasmy Gameboy.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Hey Chandler, can I talk to you for a second?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Sure.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Dude I just did something terrible.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 That was you?! I thought it was Jack!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No! No, that was Jack! Rachel thinks I asked her to marry me!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 What?! Why does she think that?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Because it kinda looked like I did.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Again, what?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Okay well, I was down on one knee with the ring in my hand
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 As we all are at some point during the day.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 It wasnt my ring! It fell out of Rosss jacket! And when Iknelt down to pick it up Rachel thought I was proposing!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Ross had a ring?! And he was gonna propose?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I guess.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 And you did it first?! This is gonna kill him! You know how much heloves to propose!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I know! I know its awful.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Well, what did she say?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  She said yes.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Does Ross know?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh God, what the hell am I going to tell him?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Well maybe you dont have to tell him anything.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh, I like that. Yeah
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 If you clear things up with Rachel then Ross never needs to find out,but you have to do it now before he hears about it and kicks your ass!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Now lets not get carried away. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 I want a baby.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Honey, weve been over this. I need to be facing the other way.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Come on! Come on, if we have sex again itll double our chances ofgetting pregnant. Do you think that closets still available?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Im so tired.  Yeah okay, but noforeplay.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Deal!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Dad seriously! Yknow you really should see someone about that!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Noted.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 I wanna go talk to Rachel for a minute, are you gonna be okay alone for abit?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Are you kidding me, I could stay and look at her forever.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	  Actually umm 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Hey!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Hi.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Are you all right?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Uhh I think I just got engaged.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh my God! He did it?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Welldid you know he was gonna ask me?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Are you kidding? Im like the one who talked him into it. I like tothink of myself as the puppet master of the group.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 And you really think this is a good idea?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 I just talked him into it, dont tell me I have to do you too. Thepuppet master gets tired people.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I just dont know! It just doesnt feel right.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Why?! You two are so meant to be together, everybody thinks so.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Really?! Even Ross?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Especially Ross!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Oh uh, hey Pheebs. Uh yknow what? Ill-Illcome back later. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Wow! Kind of uh, kind of a full house here. Ill guessjustIll come back. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 There he goes, your fiancée. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I guess so.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Although he does play with himself in his sleep.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I cant say that Im surprised.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Dad, what are you doing?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 I think there are people in there having sex.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 It cant be me, Im standing right here.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Wanna peek?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Come on!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Yknow what? I dont like you without mom.  Come on.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Were not peeking? 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Well Im peeking.  Oh my God!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Hello sir, you know Monica.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Hey uh, is it okay to come in?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Of course! Oh Joey, this ring Iits beautiful I love it!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Yeah uh look Rach, theres something I gotta tell ya.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Hey!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Nurse	 Hey! Are you ready to try nursing again?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah! Hi Emma. Hey, why do you think she wont take my breast?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Nurse	 Its all right honey, it takes some babies a while to get it, butdont worry. Itll happen.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Yowsa! 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Okay sweetie, you can do it. Just open up and put it in your mouth.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Dear Lord.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Im sorry honey, what were you saying?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh uh-uh yeah, I think that
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Oh look, shes pulling away again! Do you think my nipples are toobig for her mouth?  She looks scared. Doesnt she lookscared?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Yknow, I dont really know her.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Nurse	 Why dont we try massaging the breast to stimulate the flow. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Are you kidding me?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Its just so frustrating! Why doesnt she want my breast?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I dont know! Maybe shes crazy! 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh hey! Wait up!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hi!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Congratulations! I didnt want to say anything in front of Joeycause I didnt know if he knew yet.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What, that we had a baby? Come on lets give him a little credit,although, he did eat a piece of plastic fruit earlier.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 No! No, that you and Rachel are engaged!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh, its a secret. Oh goodie! Yes! We havent done the secretthing in a long time.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Phoebe, there is no secret. Okay? I didnt propose.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Are you lying? Is this like that time you tried to convince us that youwere a doctor?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	  I am a doctor! Yknow what? Im just gonna go andtalk to Rachel myself.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 All right, me too.  Should we wake her up?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No! No, come on let her sleep! Shes so exhausted.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 And so engaged. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?  Oh my God! She-shethinks were engaged! Why? Why? Why would she think were engaged?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Perhaps because you gave her an engagement ring? Yknow Rossdoctors are supposed to be smart.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 I didnt give her that ring!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Really?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 So whose ring is it?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Its mine.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Is it an engagement ring?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Yes!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 But you didnt give it to her?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 But you were going to propose?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No!!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Huh, I might be losing interest in this.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Look. Look, my mom gave me that ring because she wanted me to propose toRachel, but all I wanted to do is if she maybekindawantedahstartthings up again.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 Oh, what beautiful lukewarm sentiment.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Look, I didnt want to rush into anything. And it seemed like shedidnt want to either. But I dont, I dont understand how any of thishappened! What? Did she find the ring in my jacket, assume that I was going to propose,throw it on, and-and just start telling people?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Phoebe	 No! No, she said you actually proposed to her.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Well I didnt! I didnt propose!  Unless uh Did I? I havent slept in forty hours andit does sound like something I woulddo.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Look, we cant stay in here forever.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Oh, I still cant believe my dad saw us having sex! He didntmake it to one of piano recitals, but this he sees!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 This is okay. Were all adults here; theres nothing to beashamed of. Now, lets put our underwear in our pockets and walk out the door. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Hi Dad! I can still call you that right?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Of course. Ill always be your dad.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 I just want you to know that what you witnessed in there, thatwasnt for fun.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 It wasnt fun?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	  Why? Why-why-would youWh-why Look, I just dont want you to think that were animals who do it whenever wewant.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Oh, I dont think that. Before today I never thought of you twohaving sex at all. It was a simpler time.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 The truth is, Dad, were-were trying.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 What?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Yeah, were trying to get pregnant.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Oh my God! This is so exciting! Well, get back in there!  Ill guard the door!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Well, thats okay dad, we-we can wait until later.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Whoa-whoa-whoa! I dont think so! Arent you ovulating?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Daddy?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Well you gotta get at it princess! When your mother and I weretrying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating, bam, we did it. Thats how I gotmy bad hip.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Thats funny, this conversations how I got the bullet holein my head.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 This one time I had my knee up on the sink and your mother, shewas
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Daddy! I dont think we need to hear about the specific positionsyou and mom had sex.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Youre right, youre right. This is about your positions.Now, what I saw in the closet is not the optimum position for conceiving a child, althoughit might feel good.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 I dont feel good right now.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 But pleasure is important,  and it helps if the womanhas an orgasm. You up to the task sailor?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Seriously sir, my brains? All over the wall.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Hey.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Hey. I need to tell you something.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Well, nows a good time. Im on my way to have my ears cutoff.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Joey asked me marry him.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 What?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Joey proposed to me.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Is he crazy?! You just had Rosss baby!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Well, I-I said yes.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 What?! Are you crazy? You just had Rosss baby! Its-itsso inappropriate. No, its worse than that. Its wrong. Its It isbigger than mine! 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I know. Days of Our Lives, thank you very much.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 You cant marry him!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Why not? I dont want to do this alone! And hes such a sweetguy and he loves me so much.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Well do you love him?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Sure.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Sure?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah, I mean whatever.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	 Honey, the question isdo you really want to marry Joey?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 No. No, I dont. Could you be a dear and go tell him?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 You still havent told Rachel you werent really proposing?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No! She had the ring on, she seemed so excited, and then she took herbreast out.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Joey, you have to tell her whats going on! And what did it looklike?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I didnt look at it. Stupid babys head was blocking most of it.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Go and tell Rachel right now before Ross finds out.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Look, its not that easy. She said she wanted to marry me. Idont want to hurt her.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Okay, look, just do it gently.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Youre right. Youre right. I-Ill go tell her now beforeRoss finds out and Ill be gentle. I can do that. I am a gentle person. Oh, by theway. Two people screwing in there  ifyou want to check that out.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hey.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Hey.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Listen, I um I heard about the engagement.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Surprised?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 And confused. Rach, sweetie, I-I umI didnt propose to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I know.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 I dont think you do.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 You didnt propose to me. Joey did.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Poor baby, youre so tired. Rach, I didnt propose to you, Joeydidnt propose to you, and Chandler didnt propose to you.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Uh You didnt propose to me, Chandler didnt propose tome, but Joey did.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Joey proposed to you?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I can come back.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hey, wait! Wait-wait-wait! Joey, did you propose to her?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes you did!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Actually, technically, I didnt.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Well then why did you give me a ring?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Wait! Whoa-whoa, youyou gave her the ring?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No! No, and I did not ask her to marry me!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes, you did!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No, I didnt!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes, you did!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No, I didnt!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes, you did! And dont you say, "No, I didnt!"
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Ahhh!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 He was right there. He got down on one knee and proposed.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Whoa! You were down on one knee?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Yeah. Yeah, that looks bad. But I didntI didnt propose!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Then what did happen?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah, what did happen?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Okay, the ring fell on the floor and I went down to pick it up and youthought I was proposing.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah, but you said, "Will you marry me?"
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No, I didnt!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes, you did!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No, I didnt!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yes, you didOh my God you didnt!  Well then whydidnt you tell me that before?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Well I tried, but people kept coming in and then you took your breast out!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Whoa! Hey! Whoa-whoa-whoa, you saw her breast?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Ill tell you about it later. Be cool.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Well then Joey, what the hell were you doing with an engagement ring?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 It wasnt my ring! Its Rosss ring! Thats why I feltso bad Rach, because he was going to propose.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 You were gonna propose to me?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Uhh No.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Well, this is awkward. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 But I-I was going to see if yknow, maybe you uh, start dating againbut thatI mean that-that was all, Rach.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Dude, step up! I proposed.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 No, you didnt!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh thats right. Theres a lot going on here and I think I atesome bad fruit earlier.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Nurse	 Hey, she just woke up! Shes hungry. Why dont we give thisanother try?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Okay.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	  I cant believe you told her I was going to propose!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 I cant believe youre not going to propose!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Hey, Im not going to rush into anything!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Oh yeah, dude, I totally understand. Usually after I have a baby with awoman I like to slow things down!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Oh my God!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 What?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Shes doing it Look, shes breast-feeding look!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	  Ah, its beautiful.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Nurse	 Ill come back for her later.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Okay.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Thank you. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Oh wow, this feels weird.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Good weird?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Wonderful weird.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 Yknow what you guys? Im uh, Im gonna go too. And uh,Im sorry about everything.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Honey dont worry, it was my mistake.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Joey	 No, Rach, I shouldve told you sooner. Its just thatMan!That kid is going to town! 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Shes perfect.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Were so lucky.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 We really are.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Look, I-I know its not a proposal and I dont know where youare, but with everything thats been going on and with Emma andIve beenfeeling
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 I know. I know. Ive feeling
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Yeah?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Okay, well, that Wow, okay, well, ummthen maybe, at least wecan, we can talk about us again.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Yeah, maybe.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 Well good, okay. I-I, kind of think yknow if weifYoure wearing the ring.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Wh-whats that?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 And you told Phoebe you were engaged.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Rachel	 Im sorry, what?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Ross	 When you thought Joey proposed diddid you say yes?
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	 Kids, I spoke to a doctor and picked up this pamphlets on how to getpregnant. 
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Monica	  Hey dad!
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Chandler	 Hey.
09	01	0901	The One Where No One Proposes	Mr. Geller	  Sorry to bother you again, but could you pass my pamphletsback?  Thank you.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 You said youd marry Joey?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Okay you have to realize, I was exhausted, I was emotional, I would havesaid yes to anybody. Like that time you and I got married!  Im not helping.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 So you said yes to him, and you just had our baby?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 That is right and traditionally the daddy is supposed to give the mummya present but I am prepared to let that go.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 So when I came in here to see if you wanted to maybe start things upagain, you were engaged to my best friend.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 WellReally? I thought Chandler was your best friend.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Well, Chandlers my oldest friend, but Joeys myNo! Ah!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Ooooo!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  Hey you guys Im gonna take off. I just wanted to let youguys know, say goodbye.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Rachel said shed marry you?!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  This isnt the right room, sorry folks.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Ok, I dont wanna be negative so Ill say that most of thesigns you bought are good.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 No they ran out of "Its a girl" but I can fix this one, See?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  So sexy. Honey.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Yea yea. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Honey why dont you go lie down.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 No, no, Ross and Rachel will be back soon and then I gotta go to theoffice  Am I producing them?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Whyre you so tired?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Couldnt sleep last night you know, then I started worrying aboutthis big divisional meeting that I have later today, the more I worried about it the moreI couldnt sleep.  Yknow? I was like, if I fall asleep now Ill getsix hours sleep, but if I fall asleep now Ill get five hours sleep. Not matter whatI did I couldnt fall asleep.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 You know what you shouldve done, you should have told yourself thatlittle story.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	  Hi!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Everyone	 Hi, welcome home!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Phoebe did the signs!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh you guys thanks for doing this.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Look at all the stuff people sent!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh Ah!  Oh my gosh theres somethingevery mother needs, a giant stuffed gorilla that takes up the entire apartment! What arepeople think  Oh you guys I love it.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hey so wheres Ross?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Hes downstairs getting the rest of the stuff out of the cab.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Is he still mad at us?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Well, you more then me, but he cant stay to mad at me. I mean, Ijust had his baby.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Thats not fair! I cant do that.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Yeah, Im not so sure you should be here when he comes up.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 See this is what I was afraid of, I didnt think I should be hereeither but somebody  said hed be over it by now.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Hey, what do I know? I wanted to get a bigger gorilla.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 The numbers we are seeing New York, Chicago, and London areconsistently solid, but many of our officers have reported disappointing fields.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 Boston is down, Atlanta is down, Houston is down, I could go on andon but instead of boring you Ill go straight to my forty two point plan.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Walter .
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Shes just so cute! I just wanna bite her ear off and use it and asucking candy.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Phoebe! But I could take one of those little feet and put it in a pitapocket.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	  Okay I put most of the stuff away.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh great, the pacifiers?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 In the closet.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 The burping clogs?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Linen closet.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 The diapers?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 In the hospital.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Wow you guys got a hospital?  Fancy!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 No I left the diapers at the hospital! Theres some in the bag butIll run out and get some more.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Alright thanks, oh Ross could you stop by the coffee house and get me amuffin?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Sure what kind?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Umm let me think...What do I want, what d-o I w-a-n-t...
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Please take your time, its an important decision. Not like, say, Iknow! deciding to marry someone, this is about a muffin.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Blueberry.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Blueberry it is.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Thanks.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Wow, hes really not letting this go, is he?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 God how long do you think thats gonna last?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 I dunno, well he got over the "We were on a break" thingreally quickly.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Yknow I cant even worry about that right now, cause I gotthe cutie little baby, oh I cant believe how much I love her, I cant getenough of her, like right now I miss her.  I actually miss her.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 You know thats thats her.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh god look at her sleeping.  Oh, I love her so much!  Oh, Ithink Im gonna wake her up.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Oh no, Rach, no no, you know youre never supposedto wake a sleeping baby.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Well I can do whatever I want!  I made her!  Comeon little girl, hi!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 I can say I told you so but shes kinda doing that for me.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh Im sorry mummys so sorry go back to sleep go back tosleep. Shh.   Shhh! Go back to sleep
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Breaks your heart doesnt it
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 It really does how long do you think we have to stay?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 Ok if everyones on board, its settled, Chandler, Chandler?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Yep.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 Are you on board?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	  Yes.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 Then, problem solved. Chandler will be running our office in Tulsa.Youre gonna love Oklahoma.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Well, alright, we already tried feeding her, changing her, burping her,oh try this one! Go back in time and listen to Phoebe!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Alright heres something, it says to try holding the baby close toyour body and then swing her rapidly from side to side.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Ok. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 It worked!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh  oh no just stopped to throw up a little bit.  Oh come on, what am I gonna do, its been hours and it wont stopcrying.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Umm, she Rach, not it, she. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Yeah, Im not so sure.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Oh my god, I am losing my mind.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Yeah, no kidding, this just proves no good can come from having sex withRoss!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Hey Gunther, can I get a couple of blueberry muffins to go? 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Gunther	 Diapers huh?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Yep.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Gunther	 So I guess Rachel had you baby?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Yep, can you believe it?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Gunther	 Nope!  I still cant believe she slept with you in the firstplace.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Huh? Ooh  you mean like a Huh?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  Hey.  Ross, I know youre pissed at me, but wehave to talk about this.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Ah actually we dont.  
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  Fine, fine okay.  But I gotta say technically, Ididnt even do anything wrong.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	  What!  You didnt do anything wrong?!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 I said I didnt technically.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Okay lets put aside that you "accidentally" picked up my grandmothers ring and you "accidentally" proposed to Rachel.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Look, can I just stop you right there for a second? When people do this I dont really know what that means.  You were saying?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 And I can even understand that you couldnt tell Rachel, but whycouldnt you tell me, huh? You had all day to and you didnt.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 I know I shouldve.  "Imsorry." 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Not using it right, Joe.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Im gonna go.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 No, come on Ross!  Look, Ross, wehave to get past this.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Give me the bag.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 No, look, I dont know what else to do. I said Im sorry!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Joey!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 You should scream at me, or-or-or curse me, or hit me.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Im not gonna hit you.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Why not?  Youll feel better!  Ill feel better, andyou know you want to. I can see it in your eyes.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 No I dont.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 A little bit.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 No.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Little bit.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 No!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  A little bit more.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Give me the bag.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 No, hit me
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Give me the bag.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hit me.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Joey, give me the bag.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hit me!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Joe Im not kidding
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  Hit me, hit me.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 No!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  Hit me! Hit me! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 You ducked!!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Im sorry! It was a reflex! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Oh my god, this really hurts!!!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 I couldnt help it! When a fist comes at your face, you duck! Look!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 What is the matter with you?!?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 You were supposed to duck!!! Why didnt you duck?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Why dont we talk about this on the way to the hospital?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Good, good yeah,  maybe while were there, they cancheck your reflexes.   "Oops."
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Try feeding her again.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 I already fed her.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 I know, thats why I said again!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Alright you guys, we cant turn on each other, Okay? Thats just what she wants.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	  Hey.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Hey.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Monica can I talk to you outside for a minute?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh no, you guys, just stay here, Im gonna go check her diaper,Pheebs you wanna come?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Oh Im kinda part of this.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Actually Pheebs its more of a husband and wife kinda thing
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 I knew I should have married Chandler.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Okay whats up
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Umm, you know how we always said that it would be fun to move to Parisfor a year? You know, you could study French cooking and I could write and we could take apicnic along the Seine and go wine tasting in Bordeaux?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Oh yeah .
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Okay, you know how that people say that Tulsa is the Paris ofOklahoma?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 What? Who says that?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 People whove never ever been to Paris.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Whats going on?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Were moving to Tulsa! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Excuse me?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Okay, Ms. McKenna, she kind of works above my boss, she asked me tomove to Tulsa and be the president of our office there, and I was sleeping and apparently,said yes.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  Tulsa, Oklahoma!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 The Sooner State, whatever that is.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Chandler, I dont even wanna see the musical Oklahoma!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Really? Oh What A Beautiful Morning!  Surrey With AFringe On Top.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Are you trying to tell me that were moving to Oklahoma, or thatyoure gay? All right, not that this matters, but did they at least offer you a hugeraise?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 No, no, but they are going to lease us a Ford Focus.  Ill get out of it.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Thank you.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	  What is wrong with Emma?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Oh she misunderstood, she thought she was moving to Tulsa.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Umm maam, do you have a minute? I kind of have some bad news. I dont think I can move to Tulsa.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 What?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Its a funny story, actually.  I kind of fell asleep inthe meeting this morning so when I said Id move to Tulsa, I didnt really knowwhat I was saying.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 You fell asleep?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 But only because I was up all night worried about this meeting,aint that funny? Irony? Not a fan, alright . See, heres thething. I went home and told my wife about Tulsa and she wont go. See, me, I loveTulsa!  Tulsa is heaven!  Tulsa is ItalyPlease dont make me gothere!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ms. Mckenna	 Chandler, I
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 No no no! Look, Carol, can I call you Carol?  Wh-why would Iwhen your name is Elaine? Oh what a great picture of your son, strapping!  Thats a picture of your daughter, isnt it, well shes lovely. Ilike a girl with a strong jaw. Ill call you from Tulsa. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hey, so how is it?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 I broke my thumb.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Your thumb? Thats weird.  You sure yourepunching right? Make a fist.  Maybelater. Ross I feel terrible.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 You know what, you can go, I just have to fill out some forms. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 You, you want me to help you with that?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Why, does it look like Im having trouble with my misshapen claw? 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Name?  I know Ross but whats it short for? Youknow like, like Rossel or Rosstepher.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Just Ross!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Its pretty, Okay date of birth?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 You know my birthday.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Sure, May...tember.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 October 18th.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Occupation? Dinosaurs.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Actually Im a palian Dinosaurs is fine the drawing isnot.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Alright, who do you want as your emergency contact?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Ah, Rachel I guess.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Okay, relationship, boy this could take a while.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Just ah just put roommate.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Come on, you guys are more then that! I mean, youre gonna gettogether right?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 I dont think that we are.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 But you two were supposed to be together.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Well, I thought so too, but then she said shed marry you.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Come on, Ross, that didnt mean anything! She just had the baby, shewas all freaked out about doing it alone, she would have said yes to anybody.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Yeah thats what she said.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 So?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 So I dont wanna be just anybody.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Wow.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 You know what, its, its better this way anyway. I mean Idont know what I was thinking, going down that road again with us. Its justmuch easier if were just friends who have a kid.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Really?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Yeah.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 And youre Okay with that?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Yes. I mean, its what we always planned.  And if you have aplan, you should stick to it.  Thats why they call them plans.  Hello? Im fine.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hey, for what its worth, with Rachel I dont think youllever be just  "anybody."
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Hey there you go! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	  "Thanks."
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh my God! How long has she been crying?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 About a week and a half.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Well alright, looks like you guys have got it under control so Imjust gonna go.  No!Really? Misery really does love company. All right! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Rach, try holding her a different way.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 You guys, Im doing the best I can, anyone else is welcome to try.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Alright, Ill try, fine! Yes, Okay!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Here you go. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Shh! Nothing works with this child! 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh god what am I gonna do you guys, I cant even comfort my ownbaby! Im the worst mother ever!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Youre just new at this, itll get better, think about yourfirst day at work. I mean, that couldnt have been easy but you figured that out.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Yeah I dont think dressing provocatively is going to help me here!Oh my god just please take her.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Okay Ill take her, here. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 I have to go to the bathroom. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 I have to go scream into a pillow. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  Bouncy baby, Bouncy baby, Ooh baby baby, Ooh baby baby, Oohbaby baby. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	  Have I gone deaf?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 It worked! Ooh baby baby baby, ooh baby baby baby!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 You must be a fireball in bed.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 I cant believe it!  Shes asleep!  I got her to goto sleep!   I have actual magical powers!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 I can hear traffic and birds!  I can hear the voices in my headagain!  Im kidding. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh my God! You got her to stop crying!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Yes I did, Im Monica, Super Aunt
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 You are the official baby crier stopper!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Yes I am!!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Youre never leaving the apartment!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Say what?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Thats your new job, day and night, she starts crying I need youhere.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  Oh no no no no!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Phoebe	 Thankfully you dont need me at all  so OkaySuper aunt see you later! Rachel lets give it six to eight months .
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Okay so listen Im gonna go lay down.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 What?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 You know the book says that whenever shes sleeping I should besleeping so 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	  Hey!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 Shhh! We just got her to go to sleep
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Oh so there cant be any yelling.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	 No.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Were moving to Tulsa
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  What!?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	 Shhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh! Shhhhh!  Icant, I cant hear you. 
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Hey.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Heeeeey, where have you been?  What happened toyou?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Ah I had a little thing with Joey, if you think this is bad you should seehim.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 Oh no Ross! This is not good, we have to talk about this Joey thing.Please sit.  You have got to get over this Joey thing, okay? I never reallywanted to marry Joey, okay?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Okay.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 You know what I really really want?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 What, Rach?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 I wanna sleep, I wanna eat, I wanna take a shower, I mean before shewakes up and we gotta do this all over again.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	  Right.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 I mean I got news for you mister, Emma?  Not easy.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Ross	 Well, thats what Im here for.  Wantme to get that?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Rachel	 No its really okay Monica!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Monica	  Got it! Got it! Got it!Got it! Got it! Got it!
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 You know, ah, Ive been thinking about this and I gotta tell ya,its not my fault. Its a natural instinct.
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Chandler	  Hey, what you guys talking about?
09	02	0902	The One Where Emma Cries	Joey	 Hey OK great, what would you do if I did this? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Hi!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Hey! So what's the big news you had us rush all the  way over here for?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Okay, our news. My company has asked me to head  up our office in Tulsa , so as of Monday I'm being officially relocated.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Oh my God!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 What?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 What?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Monday?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 How long do you have to go for?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 They said it could be up to a year.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 A year?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	  Do you have to go?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 I kind of have to don't I? Because of this stupid  thing 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 There is nothing like the support of your loving  wife, huh?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Wait a minute, you can't go to Tulsa. Maybe you forgot,  but we've got tickets to the Jets game next week.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I'm sorry buddy, but I don't think I'm gonna be  able to make it.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 We were gonna go see the Jets!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 You can't go, I mean you're the glue that holds this  group together!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Really?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Not you.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 I can't believe you guys are moving.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 I call their apartment!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Everyone	 No!!! Ah!! Ahh!!! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Here you are 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Thank you Joey. You know what? I'm not even sure  I can have caffeine.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 I went thru this with Ben and Carol. One cup of coffee  won't affect your milk.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Yeah. Just to be sure I'm gonna call Dr. Wiener. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Every time? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Uhuh.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Rach, you don't have to call whenever you have a little  question, okay? Trust me, I know this.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 All right, I trust you. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Rachel, I can see you dialing! I don't understand why...
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 I'm on the phone!  Dr. Wiener? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 It's so weird seeing Ross and Rachel with a baby.  It's just so grown up.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 I know, yeah. I feel like we're all growing up. Person  named Wiener, God that kills me. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Look at you all grown up.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Actually, you know what? I am. That whole thing with  Rachel made me realize that maybe I'm ready for a more serious relationship.  You know? Like I'd like to meet a nice mature commitment-minded lady. And looks  aren't as important as...Nah, she's gotta be hot.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 You know, I might know somebody. Hey, how about you  set me up with someone, and we double date!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 I can do that, yeah. How is Friday?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Done. Oh good, really?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Yeah! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Let's see!  Oh, you know  who's great? Sandy Poophack. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  Poophack... 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Yeah... All right, well that rules out Lana Titweiller
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	  Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I've got good news!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 You got out of the whole Tulsa thing?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Okay, I have news. You don't have to move to Tulsa.  You can stay here and keep your job. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 It's great! How?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 So you're gonna be gone four days a week?  No.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I'm sorry, are you just used to saying that?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 No. I can't be away from you for that long.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Really?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Yeah, you're my husband. I'm not gonna live in a  different state than you for 208 days out of the year.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 That's fast math! We could use you in Tulsa. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Honey, thanks for trying to figure out a way, but  if you're going to Tulsa, I wanna go with you.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Hey, you said that without gagging!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 I know!  
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	  Excuse me? Oh yeah? Well, up yourstoo! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Who the hell was that?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Dr. Wiener. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Rach, you can't call people at three in the morning. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Oh you know what, you sound just like his wife!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Was there anything you did wrong with Emma?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Yes, of course there is! Okay? I'm not insane!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Well, what was it?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Hiccups.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Rach, I told you, you can't call him every time any  little thing comes up. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Yeah well, not anymore I can't. He fired us! What  are we gonna do? We have to find a pediatrician. Wait wait, Monica said that  when you guys were growing up, you really liked your doctor. What was his name?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Dr. Gettleman? Yeah I know, I don't think that's a  good idea. In fact, I think he's dead.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Argh! Why does everything happen to me?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Rach, I promise first thing tomorrow we'll find another  doctor, but I gotta get up early and I'm not feeling all that well.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 What? What, do you mean you're not feeling well?  What do you have? Is it Rubella? Because don't go near Emma, she has not had  that shot.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 You know? Come to think of it, it does feel Rubella-like!  
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	    Wiener, Wiener  Wiener, Wiener!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	  Rachel!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Great! Now he's gonna know it was me!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	  Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 So how is this for our big double date tonight? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  Oh my God!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Ooh, great! Just the reaction I was hoping for. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Yeah, so you found someone for me. You didn't forget? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Of course not! And you're gonna love Mary Ellen.  She's really smart and cute and funny, and I can't tell you how I know this,  but she' not opposed to threesomes. So tell me some about my guy. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 No.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Come on, give me something. What's his name?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Mike.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Mike? Okay! What's his last name?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Damnit! Is there no mystery left in romance anymore!?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 All right, we'll se you and Mike at the restaurant  in a couple hours.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey, Phoebe	  
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Why did I have to say Mike? I don't know a Mike! Why  couldn't I have said...  There's no guy in  there! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 It's impossible to find a good doctor. I mean, how  do you know the good ones from the ones who are gonna push their penis against  your knee?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Excuse me?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I know what she's talking about.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 We've got to find a new pediatrician. Ross was getting  sick last night, and I think Emma may have caught it.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Why don't you go see Dr. Gettleman? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Ross said he died. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 He didn't die. I saw his daughter last week. Said  he was fine. Her on the other hand, botched Botox.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Oh, great! Well, then I'm gonna take Emma to see  him. I wonder why Ross said that he died.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Oh, maybe he was getting him confused with his childhood  therapist.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 He saw a therapist?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Yeah, he used to have this recurring nightmare, just  really freaked him out.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Why? What was it?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 That I was going to eat him.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 MIKE!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Yeah? 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  Okay! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 I gotta tell you, I can't believe I'm doing this with  you. Although I did just get out of a nine-year relationship, so I guess I  should be open and taking some risks.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Everything is gonna be fine. Just follow my lead, okay?  All you have to do is pretend to be Mike.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 I am Mike.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Atta boy!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Okay, look...
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Everyone	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Joey, this is Mary Ellen Jenkins. So, Mike, how do  you and Joey know each other anyway?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 How do I and Joey know each other? Wow, if I had a  nickel for every time somebody has asked me that.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  From school.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Yeah, we met in college.  I mean,  high school.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Wow, you guys go way back then. So what are you up  to these days?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Well, I'm a lawyer.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Mike, 'attorney at law'!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Actually, I just gave up my practice.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 What? That's the kinda thing you usually run by me.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 I always wanted to play piano professionally, and I  figured if I don't do this now, I never will.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Wow, that's great! I liked that better than the law  thing, so...
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Which is why I waited until now to introduce you to  Mike.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mary Ellen	 I thought you thought he was still a lawyer.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 No, no, that's not what I meant. Let's get you a cocktail.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 What are you doing?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Looking for restaurant jobs for you in Tulsa.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 That's so sweet. Find anything?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Slim Pickings.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Nothing, huh?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 No, 'Slim Pickings', it's a barbecue restaurant.  They're looking for a cook. Actually 'cook' may be a bit of a stretch. They're  looking for someone to shovel mesquite. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 'Slim Pickings'...That is so cheesy.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 'So Cheesy' also has an opening.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Honey, that's okay. I actually know this woman, Nancy,  who's a restaurant biz head-hunter. Maybe she'll know of something.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Can I just say how much I appreciate you coming  with me. When we get to Tulsa I'm taking you for a great dinner at 'Slim Pickings'.  'So Cheesy'? 'Whole Hog'? It's going to be tough to keep Kosher in Tulsa.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	  Hi, Nancy. Hi, it's Monica Geller. I'm  good. Listen, I'm looking for a job in Tulsa. Well yeah, my husband has been  relocated...Because I love him! No, I don't want a job in New York. Javo   is looking? Oh my God! He asked for me personally? Oh my God! Oh, wow, this  is really flattering, but I'm moving to Tulsa. Yeah, so if you would tell Javo   'I'll take it!'
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Hi, my name is Rachel Green, I have an appointment  for Emma.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Receptionist	 Dr. Gettleman is finishing up with a patient,  he should be out shortly.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Dr. Gettleman	  I think you just have a cold,  it's definitely not Strep.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Thanks doctor.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Dr. Gettleman	 Would you like a lollypop?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 You even have to ask?!    He is alive!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 You know, it's so surprising that you and Joey have  known each other for so long and I've never heard about you.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Yeah, that's because we had a bit of a falling out.  Mike hit my mom with a car.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 No, I didn't.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 That's okay Mike, I have forgiven you. And now we're  friends again everything's great!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Please, we're trying to have a conversation. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mary Ellen	 Wow, you're a lot nicer on 'Days of Our Lives'.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 'Days of Our Lives'! That's why you look so familiar!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 What?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 What?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 What?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Do you not know each other?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  Of course we do! Mike is playing a game that  we used to play in high school. Yeah, where we pretend we don't know each other.  We played all kinds of games.  Hey, remember the one where I punch  you in the face for not being cool?!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Mike, let me ask you something. How many sisters  does Joey have?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	  Six!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 What are you doing? I said seven!    Argh!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Joey, why did you set me up with a stranger?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Because I forgot about our date, I'm so sorry.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 I'm sorry too. And just to be clear, I didn't hit his  mother with a car.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	  You are unbelievable! I spent so much time  finding the perfect girl for you, you know. Mary Ellen is really smart and  cute and loose.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mary Ellen	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Who are you kidding?  You just find some  guy off the street for me? Oh God! This is humiliating!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Look Phoebe I'm so sorry! Hey, look, if you don't like  this guy I can find you a better one.  Mike!! Mike!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 I'm out of here 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 It was nice meeting you!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  You're leaving too?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mary Ellen	 I'll stay if you can tell me my name.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Good night! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Honey, we're leaving tomorrow you've still got  a lot of packing to do.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 You're right.  Maybe I shouldn't go.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 What?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 So Nancy told me about this job at this great restaurant,  Javo . It's just a little outside of Tulsa.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 How far outside?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Manhattan.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 And you're thinking of taking it?  So before  you said being me with me was more important than any job, but I guess now  it's old job,  me,  new job. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 I'm gonna miss this hand! Okay I know it's a lot  to ask, but oh my God Chandler, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 What happened to 'you can't live without me four  days a week'?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Well, if you really think about it, I mean four days  is not that long. I mean, I see you Monday before you go to work, and I see  you Thursday when you get back, and I always work late on Tuesdays, so really  if you think about it, it's really just one day. And well, if we can't make  it one day, we've got real problems my friend.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I think you should take the job.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Really?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Yeah. I know it must be important to you when you  start chattering like a monkey.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 That's the nicest anyone has ever said to me!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Hey!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 How was the pediatrician?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Oh, I really liked him.  Yeah, it  was really, really, really good.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 You promised you wouldn't say anything.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 I know.  Ross still sees his pediatrician!!!   I don't care!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Are you serious? You still see Dr. Gettleman?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 He's a brilliant diagnostician!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Diagnostician or boo-boo fixer?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Ross, seriously! You've gotta go to an appropriate  doctor.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Why? Why? I know it's a little weird, but hey, he's  a great doctor, okay? He knows my medical history, and every time I go in there,  he makes a big deal. 'Ah look, it's my favorite patient!'
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Does he say that before he sticks his thermometer  in your touchy?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Hey, I seem to remember someone bringing his security  blanket to college!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 That was not a security blanket! That was a wall-hanging!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 It didn't spend much time on the wall!!!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Excuse me, hi. I was hoping I would run into you. Can  we talk?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Sure.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 I'm sorry, really, I'm so embarrassed. Really, I'm  a pretty nice guy. Just ask my parole officer...Apparently I'm not a funny  guy.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Why did you go along with that?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Because I was told I'd get a free dinner, which I didn't.  And that I'd meet a pretty girl. Which I did.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 That's true.  Well, is anything you told me  about yourself true?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 My name in Mike, and I do play piano.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Prove it.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 There isn't a piano here.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 That wouldn't stand in the way of a true pianist.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 You are really good! I play a little guitar myself.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Really?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Uhuh.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 That's great. What kind of music do you play?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Well, like acoustic folksy stuff. You know? But right  now I'm working on a couple 'Iron Maiden' covers. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Do you think that maybe, sometime, I could...
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 It's okay. Go ahead, ask me out.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Mike	 Okay. Do you think maybe sometime I could take you  out?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	  Oh, you just caught me off guard! Yeah,  that would be nice.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Look at this. My two best friends!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Excuse me, I don't mean to be a jerk, but the baby  with the rash came in after me.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Receptionist	 The doctor will be right with you sir.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Girl	  Mommy, I can't find Waldo.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 With the circus? He's behind the elephant.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Woman	 Wow, so your child is a big fan of the Waldo books  too?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Yeah, that's how I know. I'm Ross by the way.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Sally	 Hi, I'm Sally. So, no ring. Can I assume you are also  a single parent?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 I am a single parent.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Sally	 It's hard isn't it? There's almost no time for a social  life. I mean, where are you gonna meet someone?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Well, let's say, I don't know, you met someone in the  pediatrician's office.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Nurse	  Rossy, we're ready for you.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Hmm, yeah.  Come  on Ross jr. It's time to go in.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Boy	 Mommy 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Girl	 Mommy, what's wrong with that man?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Hey, I helped you find Waldo! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	  Oh good, you haven't left yet.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Where have you been?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 I got held up at Dr. Gettleman's office. There was  some guy that freaked everybody out.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Well, you got here just in time. I really have  to go buddy. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Ross	 Oh man.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Promise to call me when you land.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Of course I will call you. I love you.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 I love you too. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Okay, wow, wow, wow. Watch the tongue people, we've  got a baby over here.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Bye Chandler.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Awww.  Bye!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Rachel	 Bye honey. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	  What's the  matter Joe?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 I'm mad at you for leaving! You're nothing but a big  leaver. Big leaver with a stupid suitcase.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Any chance you are trying to pick a fight to make  all this easier?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Dude, you see right thru me!!  
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 Well, bye Mon, bye Ross, Rachel, bye Emma!
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Phoebe	 Okay, bye-bye!  Good  trip! 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	  Chandler, wait. It goes:  Old job,  new job,  you. This  is just something I have to do.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I know.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 I love you so much.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	 I know that too. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Chandler	  Don't worry, I'll be back before  you know it. Yes it will be the same. Because I know, that's how. I promise.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	  Double promise? Call me  when you land.
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Can I talk now?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 Okay, bye. 
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Monica	 Joey?
09	03	0903	The One With The Pediatrician	Joey	 He had to board. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 Oh hey Ross oh I'm so glad someone's here could  you zip me up?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 sure.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 Thank you. Can you believe no-one between my apartment  and here offered to do that for me?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 people  so why you all dressed  up.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 oh umm Mike's picking me up for a date.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 oh yea now um how is that going, is it getting serious?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 oh I dunno I dunno, you know I mean I like him but  am I ready to take my grade a loins off the meat market.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 you know I really admire your whole dating attitude,  it's so healthy I'm always like is this moving to fast? Is this moving to slow?  Where's this going?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 yea you know you are a bit of a drama queen.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 but you, your so much better off you just go from  guy to guy having fun and never worrying that it terns into anything serious.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I wouldn't say never, you know there's that guy   well what about  ok well there's gotta be someone.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 There isn't that's what I'm saying. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 Oh my god you're right.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 I know and yet here you are all ready for the next  date.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I can't believe I never realized this before, I'm  in my thirty's and never been in a long-term relationship oh my god  what's wrong with me.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 no, no, no there's nothing wrong with you I mean you  don't strike me as the type of person that wants to get married anyway.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I wanna get married 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 please don't cry because of me pheebs I don't know  what I'm talking about, I've been divorced three times.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 least you've been married, OH MY GOD! I wanna trade  lives with Ross 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Phoebe   what's wrong?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 nothing, I'm excited about our date, Mike this is  Ross Geller this is Mike Haaaaa 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 I'm sorry I didn't catch.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 its Mike Hanagen
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 Oh Ross Geller
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Hey, so are you sure your ready to go.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 uh huh  how do I look 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 do you have a compact in your purse?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	  No
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 you look great.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: hey Joey
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 Hey, this girl won't turn around and I can't tell  whether she's hot or not, what do you think?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Joey I am not going to objectify woman with you   but if her face is as nice as her ass woah mamma.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 Alright thanks, Oh hey have you talked to Chandler?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: yeah he has to stay in Tulsa this weekend
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 how come?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: he has to work, there's some rush on the big  ah damn it one of these days I'm really gonna have to start listening  when he talks about his job.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 oh why don't you fly out there and surprise him.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: maybe I will go  yea will have a second  honeymoon at the Tulsa romana.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 oh and you know what you should bring the black see-through  teddy with the attached garters. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: how do you know I have one of those?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 didn't till just now.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 hot not hot  Hot!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 excuse me?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 I said I think you're hot and now I'm embarrassed.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 oh I thought you said Hi.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 that would've been better, I'll try that Hi I'm Joey.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 I'm Hayley.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 look I don't usually ask out women that I meet in  coffeehouses
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Gunther	 HA!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	  gesundheit
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 I would love to go out with you.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 really, great, did I actually ask you?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 no that's just where you were going I just figured that I'd help  you out, you don't seem like the kind of guy that does this very a lot.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Gunther	 HA!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	  seriously Gunther you should see  someone about that cold, if it gets much worse you could DIE! 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 so how'd the date go?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 well it was awful every time I thought about what  you said I started crying.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 So he hasn't called?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 would you call this girl?   thanks-fo-r-a-love-ly-even-ing
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 now I feel terrible this is all my fault.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 well you not what you should feel terrible about,  this could have been my serious guy he was sweet and smart and funny. Do you  know how hard it is to meet a guy like that?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 We are a rare breed.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 what a great dinner.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 yeah and hey thanks again for letting me having that  last piece of cake at the restaurant.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	  your welcome again, I'm gonna make some coffee can I get  you anything?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 do you have any cake?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	  AWCH! That's why.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	  Hey Mike sorry  to just drop by like this, can I come in?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Sure  who are you?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 I'm Ross, Phoebe's friend from the coffeehouse.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Oh.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 yeah I really, really need to talk to you about something.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Ok, unless you're not gonna try to get me to join  a cult are you?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	  No
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 oh it's just you have that look 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 Damn super cuts!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 what's up is Phoebe ok?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 oh no yeah, no Phoebe is great, but umm I'm an idiot  look right before you guys went out I accidentally got her all upset.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 that's why she was weird.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 yes, yeah I said something stupid about her never  having had a serious relationship, but you should know she is so much fun,  a wonderful person please don't blow her off.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 I'm not blowing her off, I actually just got off the  phone with her, were going out tomorrow night, I mean I hope that's ok with  you stranger from the coffee house.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 well then I didn't need to bother you or the four  other Mike Hanagens I bothered.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 hey wait wait wait wait wait! Is that true what you  said Phoebe's never had a serious relationship?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 of course she has. if she'd never had a serious relationship  I'd go round broadcasting it like some unstoppable moron.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 but you did say it
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 yes, yes I did. and I will also say what I'm about  to say Vis-à-vis the following Phoebe has never had a serious relationship  since her. super-serious relationship with. Vicrum.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Vicrum?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 WHAT THAT'S A REAL NAME!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	  Oklahoma where the wind comes  sweeping down the plane, STOP IT! Why couldn't they have sent me to Texas?  7 o clock maybe I'll hit the gym  who am I kidding pay-per-view  porn.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 DO NOT DISTURB DO NOT DISTURB! Monica: 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: is everything all right?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 everything's great, just watching some regular  television there, what a pleasant surprise. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: I'm gonna go freshen up ok
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 Ok honey. that was close.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 Hello
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Hey Rach its me ok I just got the Chandler's room  and I caught him molesting himself.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 Oh that couldn't have been pretty. but you know  guys do that.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: yea well the weird part is... he was getting off  to a shark attack show!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 Nooooooooo!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Yes! Chandler Watches Shark Porn!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 well watching sharks? Are you sure that's what he  was doing?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: do you know how many times I've seen him jump up  like that, believe me I know what he was doing.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 man sharks. I always knew there was something weird  about that dude. But you promised to love him no matter what.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: what means if he gets like a disease or kills someone.  not if he gets his jollys to jaws!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 Ah! You know what honey guys are just different,  they like things that we can't understand, you know I once dated this guy who  wanted to pretend he was an archeologist and I was a naughty cave woman that  he unfroze from a block of ice.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Eww are you talking about my bother.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 yeah I didn't disguise that very well did i.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	  Hey
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	  Hi
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 listen to this... I went out with this girl last night  and half way through our date I realized I already slept with her.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 so basically you've slept with all the woman in  New York and now you're just going around again.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 well that's not even the weird part. I don't think  she remembered sleeping with me.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: But you don't remember sleeping with her.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 yeah but she should remember sleeping with me I am  very memorable, you guys know.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 what, how do we know, we never slept with you.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 and who's fault is that.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: what's the big deal, you forgot, she forgot, maybe  you were having an off night
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 HEY! I never have an off night ok although sometimes  when I'm a little bloated I don't feel very sexy BUT EVEN THEN I'M BETTER THEN  MOST!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Honey why don't you just let it go and ask her  out again.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Rachel	 yeah your both so slutty you don't even remember  who you've slept with, you're made for each other.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 Interesting. all right I'll go out with her again  and try to get past it  OH SALT BLOATY!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Joey, Joey.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 What?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: you don't think sharks are sexy do you?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 No.  wait a minute what was the little mermaid?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 It's open.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 Hey!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 HEY! Mike called were going out again! YAY! YAY!  
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 YAY!  quick thing, I went to talk to Mike.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 What? Wha-wha-wha-did you do ROSS!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 oh boy you got mad at that part. I went over there  to tell him how great you are but you know me BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and I ended  up telling him that.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 WHAT!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 umm. that you had a six year long relationship with  a guy named Vicrum.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 WHAT! WHY?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 well he seemed to bum hard that you'd never been in  a serious relationship.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	  If you hadn't just had a baby  with my best friend I swear to Lucifer a raber dog would be feasting on your  danglers RIGHT NOW!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 well Phoebe, I think you'll feel better when you know  a little bit about Vicrum, His a Kite designer  and he  used to date Oprah. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I'm not going along with some lie you made Ross,  No I'm just gonna be honest with him.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 Good yeah just be honest with him.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 yeah I've nothing to be ashamed of ok so I haven't  been in a relationship that lasted longer then a month. Ok I haven't had a  real boyfriend you know if he can't handle that he can leave. which he will  and that's ok. so I'll just be alone forever you know alright I'll be. it'll  be fine. it'll be fine. I'll go walking tours with widows and lesbians. Oh  
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	 I'll get it
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 ok
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	  You know I'm trying to think  of the last time I opened a door and you weren't there, Phoebe are you ok?  
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 Uh huh yeah  there's just something umm,  there's something you should know  Vicrum just called.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 so it was kind of a shock after 25 years of marriage my parents,  a perfect couple getting divorced, I kinda took it the hardest cause I was  the youngest.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 Uh huh, sure, yeah. How can you not remember me?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 What?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 How could you not remember that we slept together?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 What! When?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 I dunno!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 I really, really think I would remember sleeping with you
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 come on, come on, search your brain all right. it  was  a certain amount of time ago, I was here you were here, we had  sex  here, here, here NOT there. Anything?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley	 no it's not ringing any bells.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 my god woman! How many people do you have to had been  with not to remember any of this?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Hayley'S Roommate	 Hey Hayley you've really gotta fix that doorknob. Joey!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 Ooooooooooh, I slept with you! And you obviously remember  me Hey! I still got it.  so were good.  I'll let myself out.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 .and I said Vicrum you can't just call every time  you get lonely you know, you, you gave up that right when you slept with Rachel.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 But Rachel I thought she just had a baby with Ross
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 yeah well  yeah you know Emma's birth certificate  might say Geller but her eyes say Mookurgee.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 that is so wrong and on top of that his a glue sniffer.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I know but he call's and my heart goes to him. You  know that bastard is one smooth talking free lance kite designer.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 I just think there's somebody better out there for  you,  I mean I'm not saying me but. maybe me.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 Oh.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 and you don't have to worry about glue sniffing with  me. although I do smell the occasional magic marker, yeah ah anyway I just  think I can make you happy.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 ok I can't do this.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 what's wrong?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 well there is no Vicrum, Ross made him up because  I never really have been in a long-term relationship, I've never lived with  a guy, and I've never even celebrated an anniversary so.  if that's  too weird for you and you wanna leave I totally understand. In fact I'll close  my eye's make it less awkward  You kissed me.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 uh huh
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 so you don't think I'm a total freak
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 No. well look can I think your weird and also cool  for telling me the truth and also wanna kiss you.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 I guess so, can I. can I think it's cool that you  kiss me and also wanna kiss you again  and umm, be a little concerned about the magic markers.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Mike	 Definitely
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Ross	  This is Vicrum.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 Hi honey I'm home!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Hi, how was your flight? 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 oh it was great.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Here why don't you sit down, get yourself comfortable  because I.  have  a little surprise for you.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 well, well, well it must be five in Tulsa because  it's six o clock IN NY.C!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Ok  This is how much I love  you. 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	  Honey why am I watching  a bunch of sharks swimming around.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Is this not the good part? Do you want me to fast  forward to something a little toothier.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 no I'm not quite sure you got the right movie  that's all.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Oh well this is the only one they had at our video  store, but they did have something called crocodile killers. Or does it always  have to be sharks?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 does what always have to be sharks.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Honey look we can do something else, do you want  me to get into the tub and thrash.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 What's going on?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: sweetie it's ok, I still love you, let me be a  part of this.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 let ME be a part of this!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: I saw what you were doing in Tulsa. angry sharks  turn you on!
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 no they don't
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: then why were you watching them and giving YOURSELF  a treat.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 OH MY GOD! When you came in I switched the channel,  I was just watching regular porn
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: really?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 yeah just some good old fashion girl on girl American  action.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: I cannot tell you how happy that makes me! 
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Chandler	 You are an amazing wife.  No really  you're amazing you were actually gonna do this for me, I mean where do you  find the strength and understanding over something like that.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Monica	: Im very, very drunk right now.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	  see ordinarily I would talk  to her, but my confidence is shaken did I sleep with her? Did I not sleep with  her?
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Phoebe	 you know maybe this is a wake up call, about your    whole dating attitude. Your in your thirty's and you've never had a serious    relationship and you have never been in a long term relationship, here you    go from woman to woman, meaningless experience to meaningless experience    never even worrying that it doesn't tern into anything serious.
09	04	0904	The One With The Sharks	Joey	 your right! I love my life!  I actually did sleep with  her.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Oh hey you guys, I couldnt get a reservation for the night of my birthday, so we have to do dinner Thursday night instead.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Thursday? But thats Halloween.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 So?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	  So spooky, thats all.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 No! Its my first birthday with a boyfriend, and he has to work. Uch, I get mad at him, but I think its a little to soon to show my true colors.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma.  Which one of us should go to dinner?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Oh, Rachel!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Actually, um, I was thinking maybe both of us could go.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Oh, yay!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Thanks, I put a lot of extra thoughts on your gift.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Alright, okay, so we can all go now. That is fun. Hey, you know what? We all havent been together the six of us in such a long time.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 What are you talking about? Were all together right now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Um, Mon, Chandlers not here.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Oh, dear god!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Good morning everyone, its nice to see our team together for the first time. Now, before we get started, are there any questions?  Yes, Ken is it?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ken	 Thats right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  Well, dont believe everything you hear, Ken.  But yeah, thats true. Alright, lets get started, by take a look at last quarters figures.  Ah, Claudia, arent you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses ass?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Claudia	 Im sorry. Does the smoke bother you?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 No, no, no-no-no. I smoked for years, then I quit. Right now, I cant remember why.  Youre not allowed to smoke in this office. Not right?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Claudia	 Yes, in Oklahoma its legal to smoke in offices with fifteen people or less.  Would you like one?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Alright, lolook. I dont smoke anymore. But if the rest of you want to light up, go ahead, its fine.  So you all smoke then? Thats almost rude, that Im not.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ken	 Thats not true. If you dont wanna smoke 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  Ken, please! No, I cant, I cant smoke. If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ken	 Im sorry, but isnt your wife back in New York?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 I always liked you, Ken. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	  Trick or treat! 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	  Hey!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Ooh, and treat it is. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Hmhmm. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Wow, so glad I changed. Almost wore my ??? outfit that cant contain my breasts.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 This is not, what Im wearing. Im ovulating and Chandlers gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Ohh. Oh wait!  you guys wont be late for my dinner, will you?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Believe me, Chandler and I have not seen each other in over a week. Well probably be the first ones there.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 kay, see you there. Happy humping!  Heyhey! Oh, wow, somebody smoked out here? Oh my god, dont people know, youre not allowed to smoke in public spaces?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Actually, in Oklahoma smoking is legal in all commune areas and offices with fewer than fifteen people.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 You smoked!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 No! I just happened tdo a lot trivias about smoking in different states. For example, in Hawaii cigarettes are called Leyhallalookoos.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	  Chandler, you stink of cigarettes.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Uch, do you think, Monica is gonna be able smell it?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Are you kidding? The woman has the nose of a bloodhound  and the breasts of a Greek goddess.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Pheebs?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	  Im gonna go. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  Okay, something to cover the smell  Oven cleaner!  Unscented!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	  Welcome home. Ive missed you. join me in the bedroom?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 No thanks, Im good.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	  O-kay, so you wanna play it that way, do you?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  Right. You know what? Actually I just get off the plane, so Im feeling kinda gross. Maybe I should just take a shower.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 You dont need a shower.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  Alright, the truth is, I soiled myself during some turbulences.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 What do I smell?  I smell smoke. Huhdid you smoke?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Yes, but I just had one. Two. Two tiny cigarettes. Okay, five. A pack. Two packaa carton. Three big fat cartons in two days.  But its over, I made a decision, Im not gonna smoke anymore.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 But, those are for you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Alright, well just, uh, see when you get here. Bye.  Huh, that was my mom, shes stuck in terrible traffic.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Okay, well thats now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Oh, what were the other two?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Well, lets see. The first one is: I dont want to. And, you know, Im not going.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 I know, its the first time, were leaving the baby and  hey, I know how hard it is for you, but  but Emma is gonna be fine. My mom is gonna be with her. Shes great with kids.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 She is?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Ya.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 What about  Monica.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Hey, you only heard Monicas side of that. That little fatso was a terror.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Ish. I just dont think I can bear it.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Rachel, I know that you can. And you should.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Uch.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Really, it would be good for you and in fact, why dont you, why dont you go ahead to the restaurant and I will wait for my mom and then Ill meet you there.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh-A.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 No, no, really. You should go. Just go! Go! Go out! Really, the world is your oyster. Kick up the heels. Paint the town red. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 You need to learn some new slang.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Im serious. Cmon, you should go. Here.  No, uh-uh, just go.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 What  Oh! 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 No! No, you know what?  You  story walking. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 I was just going to say that I left my keys.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Oh,  holy molly are we in a pickle now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Where is everyone? Theyre forty minutes late.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 I know, u-uch.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Im starving. I know we were coming here tonight, I ate nothing all day.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 What about me, he? Only had one lunch today.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	  Soo, are we expecting the rest of our party shortly?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Yes, they are expected presently. Yeah, yeah um, their arrival is in the offing.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Right. We do have a table for two available, perhaps you would be more comfortable.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 No, theyre comin, were waitin right here.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Joseph!  Thou neednt worry, they shant be long.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Its just that we do have some large parties waiting.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 One really does have a stick up ones ass. Doesnt one?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 How can you smoke in this day of age? Do you not seen that ad with a little kid walks to grandpa, its chilling.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 I messed up, it was a meeting, everybody was smoking.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 So what? Dont you have any will power?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Will power? Ive watch home movies of you eating ding-dongs  without taking the tin foil off.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 You said that was sexy!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 kay, look: Can we just drop this? Im not gonna smoke again.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Thats right, because I forbid you to smoke again.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You forbid me?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Mhmm.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You know, I flew a long way t see my loving wife? Is she here by the way?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Dont joke  with me, okay? Im very, very upset right now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Oh, would you say this was the most upset you could be?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Yes.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Then, I might as well   do this . Not really sure what to do now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Well, Ill tell you what were gonna do: We are already late for Phoebes birthday dinner, so you point out put out that cigarette, were gonna put this fight on hold and go have sex.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Fine. What!?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Sex! This is the last day Im ovulating, and when we dont do it now, well have to wait till next month. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You serious? 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Oh yeah!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Right, fine, Ill do it, but no talking.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Huh, and no cuddling.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 And no kissing your neck.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Oh good, I hate it when you do that
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 And lots of kissing your neck.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Okay, well the ??? is not home.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 No. Uch.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Oh-oh, wait, my mother is gonna be here any minute. And she has the keys.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Alright, I cant, I cant wait that long. You have to do somethingknock that door down!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 I would, but I bruise like a peach. Besides, yyou know, everything is gonna be fine. The babys sleeping.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 What if she jumped out the bassinet?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Cant hold her own head up, but yeah jumped.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh my god, I left the water running.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Rach you did not leave the water running. Please, just pull yourself together, okay?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Ah, did I leave the stove on?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 You never cooked since 1996. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Is the window open? Because if theres a window open, a bird could fly in there.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Oh my god, you know what, yeah, I think youre right. I think  listen, listen!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Ubb.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 A pigeon, a pigeon.  No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty birds aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays  are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Boy, are you gonna be sorry if thats true.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Hello.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe, Joey	 Hey.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Its been an hour. ??? be willing to reconsider switching to a smaller table.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Maybe we should just eat now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 You cant order until your entire party has arrived. Restaurant policy.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Wha-a how about this: Another table leaves, right? But theres still some food left on their place, okay, whats the restaurants policy about people eatin that?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Estrangement .
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 But it happens?  Im gotta go to the bathroom.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 No, you cant go. No-no-no, I cant hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 If you ask me to stay, Ill pee. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Maitre D	 Good evening, Miss.  Miss?  Miss?  Miss!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Okay, fine, Ill move. Alright, you dont have to manhandle me.  Where?  Okay. Thank you. Wach.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	  Finally you guys made it.  Pheebs, who the helluhuhh!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Spend more time with the tie. Thatll make a baby.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Look, I cant do this. I cant make luv to you while were fighting this way.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Oh sure, now youre Mister Sensitivity. But when you wanted to have sex right after my uncles funeral
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 That was a celebration of life. Alright, look, Im not gonna do this. Alright, is this really the way you want a baby to be conceived?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 No, youre right. Mnya, we shouldnt do it like this. Huch. For what its worth, Im, Im sorry. I shouldnt have come down on you so hard about the smoking. So you had a few cigarettes, not the end of the world.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Mean it?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Yah.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You are incredible. Unless, IIm not gonna smoke again. And if I do, I promise, I will hide it so much better from you. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Dyou want to?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Yeah, lets celebrate life!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 kay.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Och, god.  Oh, thank god, youre okay. Im so sorry we left you. Mom never gonna leave you again. Never ever ever again. Uch.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Great. So lets get going?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh no. I mean it. After what just happened, Im never leaving her again.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ms. Geller	 I understand, separation is hard. One time I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor and he got so upset, he took off all his clothes, tucked his ??? between his legs and cried out: Mommy, Im a girl, take me with you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Somehow over time it got easier to be apart from you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Uhh. You are welcome.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 You know what? Lets not talk.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 What?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Uch. I am still so mad at you for smoking.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 But you said you forgave me. It was just a couple of cigarettesno big deal.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Oh, blablablabaybaybay.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Leave it.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 I was just saying that because I was ovulating and you said you wouldnt have sex with me while were fighting.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You tricked me to get me into bed?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Thats right, I got mine.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 I feel so used.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Well, I guess theyre not coming. You wanna just order?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Thank you.  Waiter! lright, this is gonna be fast, so try to keep up: Risotto with the shaped truffles and the roasted rip steak with the golden Chanterelles and a Bordelaise sauce and that any that stuff I just said means snails. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Erdoes not.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Tomato tart and which of the pastas would you recommend?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Oh, theyre both exclus
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Both it is, thank you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Oh, uh, again. Can I make a special request: Can you bring everything as soon as its ready? Appetizers, entrees, we dont care.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross, Rachel	  Hey, hi, hi!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Ill just wait to put your order in.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 You guys are over an hour late. What happened to you two?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Im so sorry 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 We got locked out of the apartment, we 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Thats a great storycan I eat it?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 And then Rachel wasnt sure she could leave the baby.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 N-it wasnt easy, but its your birthday and I did what I got to do.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 And thats Judy over there at the bar with Emma?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh honey, this is for the best, thus Im not distracted, worrying about Emma, how shes doing at home and Im being completely here with you and, oh, she spit up!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 What?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 She spit up. Judy! She spiJudy! Look alive, Judy!  Thank you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Thanks. Oh.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh, ooh, everything looks delicious. What should I ha-ave? What should I have?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	  Never hit a woman. Never hit a woman.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Yknow this ??? is incredible.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Ross bruises like a peach. He bruises like a peach.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Okay, Ill have the fixed salad and the duck.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Yah, Ill have the soup and the salmon.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 And remember whatever comes up first. Okay? And hurry, because 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	  Happy birthday!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Son of a bitch!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Wher-where have you been?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Well, we had a little fight.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 I would never lie to get someone into bed.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy.  Ooh, uh, thanks. Wow, little tight, isnt it? How dyou get a bigger table? You-you had a big table, but they made you move. Huh-huh, shut up Monica. Whoo, I suppose that Chandler will have the smoked duck.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 I suppose that Monica will have the  manipulative shrew.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Ill give you another minute.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Why are you going? He said, she wanted the shrew! 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Rach, cmon, Emma is fine. Youre turning into an obsessive mother. Okay, you need to stop.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Yguys ever heard the story about when Rosses mom went to the beauty salon?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 You mean the lully story?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	  Huh-huh, they already know it.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 You guys, weve been waiting for you for a long time, maybe you should order.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	  No, no, its okay, I already told the waiter what they want.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Why would you do that?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Chandler, control your woman!
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	  Okay, as everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast  to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Aw  what?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 N-no, Emma dropped her sock.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Moms here? I wanted to have lunch with her today, she told me she was out of town.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Ross, she still has not noticed that the babys sock is on the ground.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 s a good toast.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	  Could you please get her attention?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 W-oa  Mommy! 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	  Oh, for gods sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock!  Im sorry, was that rude? Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt  the hideousness  that is this evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you didnt even have the courtesy to call.  Well, its too late now.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 Well, ??? think thats us?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 well, this is, this is, this is not over!  Hello?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	  Well, what is going on with you two?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Uch, you see, Im ovulating.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Oh yeah, thats what she says. But maybe youre not ovulating at all, maybe its just a clever ruse to get me into bed.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just cant get enough.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	  You not gonna believe this: She lied! She tricked me into having sex with her.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 So? Did have sex, right?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 Whats the matter with me? Why Im such a girl?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	  Okay, that was Mike.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Phoebe, hi, were so sorry. Youre totally right. We are here one hundred per cent and we love you and we are ready to start your birthday celebration.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Mhuh, guys, that means the world to me. Huh, nkay, Im gonna take off.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 What?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Phoebe	 Oh, I love you guys too, but Mike got off work early. Wait. Wait, Im not tnot that kind of girl that just ditches her friends to be with her boyfriend. You know what? I am. Bye guys!  Judy! Bye.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Rachel	 Oh thank god, if Phoebes going, can we please take Emma home?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Ross	 You know, I think thats a good ideaour babysitter just pounded in another Chardonnet.  Bye, yguys.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 Bye.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 See ya. Well, this is just us.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica, Chandler	 Mhum.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 So, Im, Im probably still ovulating. Do you want to give it another try?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Chandler	 So you never had sex with a Kennedy, have you?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Do, do you gonna do it now?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Monica	 We dont have much time. Once the egg descended the oviduct 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 No-ohoh. 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Maitre D	 I sincerely hope the rest of your party is returning.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Nah, just me. All alone.  Dinner for six for one, uh, you boys are about to see something really special.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 How was everything, sir?
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Excellent. The shrew in particular was exclusive.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiter	 Well, I hope, you got some room left.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiters	  Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear 
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Joey! Joey.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Waiters	  Joey, happy birthday to you.
09	05	0905	The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner	Joey	 Thats the best birthday ever.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Hello?  Hello?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	  I LOVE MY NEW JOB!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Honey, you're screaming.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 YOU BET YOUR ASS I AM! I just had the best first day   ever! The kitchen: twice as big as Allessandro's.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Oh, that's great.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Yeah, a-a-and clean. Not just health department clean...   Monica clean.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Awesome.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Oh, and the people are so nice. There's this one guy,   Geoffrey, he's the Maitre D., Chandler, you will love him. He is without a doubt,   the funniest guy I have ever met. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 This is nice.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I know! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 You need both hands for that?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Yeah, I kinda do.  Well,   how's this? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  Aaahhh, look   at you two... holding hands... huh is this getting serious?  Have you not talked about it yet?    Am I making you uncomfortable?  If you were bigger you'd hit me,   huh...? Aaaaaahhhhhh 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I'm sorry... I'm sorry. It's obviously way too early   for us to be... having that conversation.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Is it?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  Maybe not, is it?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Okay, when I got divorced, I didn't think I'd feel this   way about someone for a really long time... Then again, I didn't think I'd meet   someone like you... and... this may be crazy soon, but... I want you to have   this...  No, not... that's gum.  Ooh, five bucks...   I love it when that happens, you know... Think no note's there...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  I know Mike, why don't you keep digging?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Oh, sorry. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oh, it's a key. To be honest, I think I'd prefer the   five dollars.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 It's to my apartment.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  Oh wow, ooh! Ooh, big step for   Phoebe and Mike.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Yeah, look, and I don't want you to feel like you have   to give me your key just because...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oh no, I want to.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Oh, thank God. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Yeah... ooh... wow... Even started to think I'd never   meet someone that, you know, I wanted to... do this with. Here you go. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Is this cool, huh?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 It really is.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  Oh, I know it... It   is amazing these little things open doors... huh! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 So I don't go back to work for another four weeks,   but we would like our nanny to start right away, so that Emma could get a chance   to know her.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Prospective Nanny	  I think that's   really smart. The easier we can make the transition for her, the better. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 That's great, great. So do you have any questions   for us?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Prospective Nanny	 Not really.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Allright. Well thank you so much for coming... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Thank you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Really nice to meet you... and we'll call you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Prospective Nanny	 Oh, you know, wait. I do have   one question.  Do you guys do random drug   testing?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Boy, we uhm... hadn't really thought of that.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Prospective Nanny	 That's cool. But... but if you do, I'm   gonna need three days notice.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Okidoki!  Wow! We're never gonna find a nanny.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Oh, come on Rach, we will. I promise. We have more interviews    And worse comes to worse, we can always reconsider   the uhm... the first one we met with.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  What, the blonde with no bra?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 She was blonde?  Just a sec.! Okay, okay. This one's name is Sandy. She's got a degree   in early childhood education, uhm... she worked for her last family for three   years.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Okay... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	  Hi... I'm Sandy.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 And she's a little mannish...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  Oh my God! David!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Hi! I-i-is this a bad time?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  No! It's a great time, come in...! WOW,   hi... Oh my gosh! What are you doing here? Are you back from Minsk?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Well, just for a couple of days, uhm... I'm here to   explain to the people who gave us our grant, why it's a positive thing that   we spent all their money and uhm... accomplished uhm... nothing.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Who cares, it got you here.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Well, it got me to New York anyway, and then I got   on a cab at the airport, and the guy said where to? and I just... gave him your   address I... I... I didn't even think about it.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Wow. Where is your luggage? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Damn it!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 A-Allright, well... I'll call the cab company.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Wa... wa... wait! We can... call them later. Can you   just... just stand there f-f-for a moment? Boy! There's an old Russian expression,   uhm... it goes: Schto ya ztez vigul... ui! Roughly translated that   means uhm... This thing that I'm looking at: wow!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Thank you! God, no! You should see me when... Oh actually,   no, I look pretty good.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Are... are you kidding? You know, when you don't see   someone for a long time, a-a-and you kind of build them up in your head and   you start thinking about: Come on, don't be crazy. Nobody is that beautiful,   but... well, you are.  Well, so, uhm... are you seeing...   anyone? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I'm... I'm just... I'm the worst person ever. How   can I not tell David that I'm seeing Mike?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Maybe he didn't give you a chance.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 He said: Are you seeing someone? And I said no...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Oh, well... That had been your window.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Yeah! I mean, I don't know. I was just , I was looking,   I was looking in his eyes and I was just thinking: Oh my God! It's David. David's   here. He's just, he's so irresistible.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Really? The scientist guy?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Really? Chandler?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Continue...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oh.Okay, then it gets worse, 'cause then I told him   that I would see him tomorrow night.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Phoebe!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I know!  Evil! And... and... and...   I like Mike so much, you know. It's just going really well. Oh my God!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Wow, isn't it ironic that David would show up on the   same day that you and Mike exchange keys?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  Uhuh... Yeah...!, you know. And given   my life long search for irony, you can imagine how happy I am.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 What are you gonna do?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I mean I guess, I just have to... tell David that   nothing can happen between us. Unless I don't... You know, complicated   moral situation, no right, no wrong...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 You have to tell David!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Okay, I knew I should have had this conversation   with Joey.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Funniest guy she's ever met!    I'm funny, right...? What do you know, you're a door... You just like knock-knock   jokes...  Save it for   inside! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Heeeeeey! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Hey!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Hey!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 So... Oklahoma is a crazy place. You know, they   call it the Sooner state. Frankly I'd sooner be in any other state.  And what's with Oklahoma   having a pan handle? Can all states have stuff like that? Hey yeah, I'm from   the waistband, Wyoming. But when I was seven, we headed over to the crotch.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	  Was your cabin   pressurised?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  And don't get   me started on the way that people from Tulsa talk.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Okay. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 What's with the word y'all? You know, just... two   words just... pushed together... Are we all allowed to do that, because if so,   I say why stop there? You know, your new poodle could be your noodle. And fried   chicken? Could be fricken.Waiter, waiter excuse me, I'll have the fricken?  See, that's... that's funny with the fricken, right?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 No, it just remind me of something this guy did today   at work. I told you about that funny guy, Geoffrey, right?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Yeah, he came up...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Well, he did this bit... You probably had to be there,   but it was Liza Minelli locked in our freezer, eating a raw chicken. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Were you there?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, but it sounds like it was fricken funny...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 I really do understand how hard it's gotta be to leave   your child with another person. I mean, it's leaving behind a piece of your   heart... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Sandy, that's exactly what it is...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Are you gay? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Ross!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 It's okay. I get that a lot doing what I do. But I   am straight. I-I'm engaged actually.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Her name is Deliah.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh, that's pretty.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  So you're just like a... guy who's a nanny?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 I realise how it's... a bit unorthodox for some people,   but I really believe, the most satisfying thing you can do with your life, is   take care of a child.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Okay.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Like in my last job, I met Daniel when he was three   weeks old. And I got to watch him grow into this awesome person...   When I left, I said: I'll see you soon... And he said to me: Skdandy...  That was his name for me... I'll see you every day...   right in... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Yeah, kids say all kinds of crap. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh God, she mu... she must need her diaper changed.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Oh, oh, I can do it for her, if you want...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh, that would be great!  I love him, I love him, I love him...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Oh, come on, Rach, he's a guy!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 So wh..? He's smart, he's qualified. Give me one good   reason we shouldn't try him out.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Because, it's weird!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Why?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 What kind of job is that for a man? A nanny? I-It's   like if a woman wanted to be...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Yes?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 King?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 I er... I hope you don't mind. I used some of my home-made   lotion on Emma. It's a mixture of calendula and honey cream. It'll dry that   rash right up. Plus... It keeps the hands young... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Please?  YES! Sandy you're hired.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 That's great!  I'm   sorry. It's just... such an emotional thing when you're welcomed into a new   family...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oooh... ***I really can't hear what she says*** come here.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 You gotta be at least bi...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Hey!  I need you to set me up for a joke. Later, when Monica   is around, I need you to ask me about fire trucks.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Ooh. I-I don't know Chan. I'm not so good with remembering   lines.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	  Well, thank God your   livelihood doesn't depend on it.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 I know, right?    Wh... Wh... Why are we doing this?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Monica says that her Maitre D. is the funniest guy   she's ever met.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Seriously? She actually said that?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Yes! Am I crazy to be this upset?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Nooooo! Being funny is your thing!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Yeah!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Without that, you just got "lame with women".
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Ye.... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Hi! There you are.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  Fire trucks! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Wow, you look even... more beautiful than you did yesterday.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oof...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 In fact, ehm... I going to kiss you now. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oh, wait, wait!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Yeah, I-I don't, I can't get away with stuff like that.   I-I-It sounded sexy in my head, so I...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, no, it's not that.    Uhm... Remember when you asked me if I was seeing someone and I said no? Well,   uhm... I am. His ... his name is Mike.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Oh... oh...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Yeah, I should have told you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 No... well, yeah.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Well, i-it's okay. I-I-I understand... Well, s... well,   are you happy with this guy?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I am happy.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Damn it! I-I'm sorry. I-I don't mean that. I-I want   you to be happy... But only with me. No, uhm... that's not fair. Uh, who cares,   leave him!. Oh, I don't mean that. Yes I do... I'm sorry Uhm, I... I think I   should probably uhm... go...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Well... but David, just... I just want you to know   that... that... you know... telling you this... is one of the hardest things   I've ever had to do.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Well... just so you know... hearing it wasn't exactly   a Vladnik carnival either... Can we at least hug goodbye?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Of course, yeah. You know, a kiss   on the cheek wouldn't be totally inappropriate...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 No... no...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I mean... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 In Minsk...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Yeah?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 ...it's uhm... i-it's two on each cheek and uhm...   and one on the lips.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Well, if that's what they do in Minsk...  In New York...   it's... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Oh... Oh boy...  Hi...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Is everything allright?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh yeah, it's fine, it's fine. Sandy was just... was   just telling me about how he proposed to his fiancée and it was just   sooo beautiful.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Well, her favourite flower is the camellia. From the   poem...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 I can't... I can't hear it again.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 You know, I can't tell it again... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 And I'm fine never having heard it...  Rach, can I... can I see   you for a sec?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Yeah!  Excuse me... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Do you realise that man has cried in our apartment three   times...? Huh? I haven't cried that many times since I moved in.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Look, Ross, he's just... Sandy is just sensitive,   that's all.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Okay, okay, see... that... that   is the problem. He is too sensitive. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 What...? Too sensitive to take care of our baby?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Yeah, I mean, all things   that guy...  These are amazing!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Sandy made Madeleines.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 This... this is exactly what I'm talking about. What   kind of a guy makes... makes... delicate French cookies, huh? They're not even...   butch, manly cookies with... with... you know with... with chunks. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Well, I... you know, I-I-I don't know what to say...   I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men.   You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in   from branding cattle.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Hey... there's sensitive... and there is too sensitive.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Okay, what? What is too sensitive? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Hmmm... No, no... No, I can't do this. It's bad.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 But... I-I-It's nice... A-a-and... nice is good. A-a-and   good is not bad, ergo, w-w-we should keep kissing.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, no. No.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 But... ergo...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Look David, if... if you had never left, then... yeah,   we'd probably still be together right now, but... you did leave, and I-I'm with   Mike and I really care about him...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Uhm... uhm... Goodbye... Uh... Schto ya ztez vigul...   ui... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Well... hey, the key works...! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	  And you thanks for the   face massage. Thank you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Did Rachel tell you we hired a male nanny?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Yeah! I think that's great!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Oh really? Did she tell you he plays the recorder, recites   poetry and bakes Madeleines?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Oh... How are they?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Lighter than air...  But that's not the point. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Hey!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Hey...! Rachel and I hired a male nanny.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  Really...? Guys do that...? That's...   weird...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Thank you!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 That's like a woman wanting to be a...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 ...a what? A what? What's the end of that sentence?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Yes... What is the end of that sentence?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Uhm... A penis model.  Anyway, hey... Did you tell Chandler   that some guy from work is the funniest guy you've ever met?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Yeah, so?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Wow!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Really? Do you not know Chandler?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Is that why he's acting so weird...? He's jealous...?   Oh my God, that is crazy. It's not like I'm attracted to Geoffrey...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 So what? Being funny is Chandler's thing...   You know, like Ross's thing is... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Science...? Academia...? Being a good father...?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 ...No... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 I can't believe he's that upset about this...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Monica, you have to do some damage control here, okay.   'Cause he's feeling like... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Hey!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Heeeyy! Hey!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 What are you guys talking about?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Uhm... Rachel and I hired a male nanny. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 You got a man who's a nanny...? You got a manny...?   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 You know, I don't mind a... male nanny, but I do   draw the line at a male wetnurse. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Ohhh, ooohhh... you are on a roll, mister!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 If I'd known you guys were coming over, I would   have brought more pizza. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Okay, okay... Chandler you... you stop it! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 What is so funny about that? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Well, I don't know... I-It's... just the way you say   it... I mean, you're funny... You have that funny thing. You're a funny guy!   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Did you tell her what we talked about? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Yeah....
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 So those were pity laughs? PITY LAUGHS? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Honey, listen... You have nothing to worry about with   Geoffrey.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Oh yeah? Is he funnier than me?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Well, you're... you're different funny... I mean,   you're... you're more sarcastic a-a-and... well, he does... bits... and impressions...   and... and limericks...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 I do limericks... uhm... There once was a man named   Chandler, whose wife made him die inside.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Honey, you know I think you're hilarious! Come on,   you know that joke you told me last week? The one about Jerry Lewis and the   girl with the lazy eye...?  That slayed me.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Hey... I made up that joke and told it to you! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Not knowing when to shut up...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Yep! That's my thing...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 So... how many guys have your key?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, no, no, no, no... It's not... it's not... i'ts   not as bad as it looks... really. I was just saying goodbye to an old friend.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Your lipstick's on his mouth.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Oh, uh... we just uh... happen to wear the same shade.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, uhm... David and I did use to go out... but years   ago, and he lives in Minsk. He's only... he's only in town for a couple of days.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Did you uhm...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 No, no... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 ...kiss him?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Oh, well, yeah...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Yes, but uhm... You should know... she really likes   you. I-In fact I-I-I don't think you realise j-just how lucky you are fella.   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Don't point your finger at me.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Why? Wh-What are you going to do about it?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Well... I'll... just show you what I'm gonna do about   it... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Stop it! Stop it, before someone gets really hurt!    Here David, you   should just go.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Allright... But... if I ever do come back   from Minsk...  well, you just better watch out.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Well, if I ever goto Minsk, you'd   better watch out.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Oh, you're going to Minsk?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Well, I might.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Really? Well, if you do, come in the spring. It's just   lovely there.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Okay, well... guys?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Right... Goodbye Phoebe. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 Hey, what are you kidding me?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 Right-o, right-o...  Take good care of her.   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. If you... If you want your   key back, I totally understand.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Mike	 It's never gonna happen again right?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Phoebe	 Right! Never! Never! I swear! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	David	 I-I... Oh I...I just wanna say uhm... if you do ever   come to Minsk, that's my number  We'll uhm... we'll   party up Vladnik style. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Yeah! Allright! Hey, hey Ross. Check it out! Sandy taught   me Hot-cross Buns.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Really? Sounded like Three Blind Mice.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Noooo... Three Blind Mice goes like this... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  I swear to   God...! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Who's up for puppets?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Me! I'm up for puppets!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Well, please welcome... The Snufflebumps... Who wants   to be mr. Wigglemunch and who's gonna be the Grumpus?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Okay, okay... How exactly is a two month old supposed   to appreciate puppets?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Actually studies have shown that the movement and colours   help their cerebral development... The whimsical characters are just for us.   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 I wanna be mr. Wigglemunch. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	  Oh my God!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Well, I guess we know who's gonna be the Grumpus...   
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 That was kind of rude!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Oh, I'm sorry. Please apologise to Sandy and the Snufflebumps   for me.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 You know, he was just doing his job...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Well, you know what... I-I'm sorry I'm the only one   who isn't in love with Gary Poppins out there... But I just... I can't... I   can't go through with this.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Oh, come on Ross...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 No! Hey, you know what? I'm sorry. I would never force   you... to hire someone you were this uncomfortable with...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Oh... That's true.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Thank you!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 Well, you're the one who wants to fire him, so you're   gonna have to do it. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	  So you see Wigglemunch, that's   why it's important to shaaaaaaare...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  I am learning so much from you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Well, I'm off to Tulsa, so if your Maitre D. friend   has any funny Oklahoma jokes, tell him to e-mail me at www.hahanotsomuch.com.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Honey, you can relax. Last night at work, Geoffrey   told this really sexist joke. After that, not so funny anymore.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 Really...? See... that's the thing: you gotta keep   it smart, people!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Okay, don't miss that flight. You know I love you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 I love you too.  And... I like you as a friend.  
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Allright. See you later!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Chandler	 See ya! 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	  Did that guy really make that joke?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Monica	 Naaaa... He still kills me. Last night he had me laughing   so hard, I swear... a little pee came out.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Here goes...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	 I can't watch. It's like firing Elmo. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Sandy... Hi, we uhm... we kinda need to talk. I'm afraid   it's not working out.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	  Oh...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Yeah, uhm... I mean, Rachel and I, think you are great...   with Emma... uhm... We just feel...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  YOU! You feel!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 I... just feel that the... the chemistry isn't right.   I'm sorry. We're... we're more than happy to give you good recommendation...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Oh, no, no, no... That's okay. I got a lot of offers   from other families. I just picked you guys because... I liked you the best.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Oh, damn you Geller!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Anyway, uhm...Well, I'm glad there's no hard feelings.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 No, none at all. You need to be happy with whoever   is in your home... Although if you don't mind telling me, what was your problem?   Maybe it's something I can work on in the future.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 No, you know, it's uhm... nothing you did, it's... it's   uhm... my issue.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 What is it...?  Please...? 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 You know, I'm just not uhm... that comfortable with   a guy who's as sensitive as you.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 That's fair... Although, can I ask... why do you think   that is?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Why... I... I don't know.    Uhm... errrr... maybe... maybe because of my father?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 hmmm... 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 I mean, uhm... you know when I was growing up he was   kind of a tough guy... You know a-a-and as a kid I wasn't the athlete I am now.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Rachel	  Huh ha ha!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 I play squash...! Anyway, uhm... I uhm... I always get   the feeling he thought I was too sensitive.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 That must have been hard.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 It was hard... I remember... I was in my bedroom...   playing with my dinosaurs... playing and learning... and my father   walks in and says... he says... "What are you doing with those things?   What's wrong with you, why aren't you... why aren't you outside playing like   a... like a real boy?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 But you are a real boy!
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 I know I am!  ...And when it's   summer, and it's hot, why can't you wear a tank top?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 It's allright! Crying is good. It lets the boo-hoos   out. 
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Ross	 Here come some more...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy, Grumpus	 And what's the one kind of boat that can never,   ever sink?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey, Wigglemunch	 What kind?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy, Grumpus	 A friend-ship...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Wow! You blow my mind...
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Oh, I gotta go.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 Aaahh... How much do I owe you?
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Sandy	 Twenty bucks.
09	06	0906	The One With The Male Nanny	Joey	 It's like the cheapest college ever.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 And that's why, no matter what mommy says, we really   were on a break.  Yes we were! Yes we were!  Come   here gorgeous.  Oh! Look at you! You   are the cutest little baby ever! You're just a... a little bitty baby, you know   that? But you've got...  You've got big beautiful eyes...   Yes you do... and a... and a big round belly.  Big baby   butt! I like big butts.  I like big butts and I cannot lie / you other   brothers can't deny / when a girl walks in with an itty, bitty, waist / and   a round thing in your face you get... Oh my God, Emma... you're   laughing! Oh my God, you've never done that before, have you? You never done   that before... Daddy made you laugh, huh? Well, daddy and Sir Mix Alot... What?   What? You... you wanna hear some more? Uhm... My anaconda don't want   none / unless you got buns hon...    I'm a terrible father!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Hi!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Hey... hey listen... What do you guys know about investments?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 How come?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Well, I'm starting to make good money on the show and   I'm thinking... I should probably do something with it.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 What do you do with your money now?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Well, I just tape it to the back of my toilet tank.    I didn't say that! It's in   a bank guarded by robots!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Do you have any ideas?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Uh, yeah... This guy at work got me excited about going   in on an emu farm. That'd be kinda cool huh? Pitchin' in on the weekends, helping   to plant the emus...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Joe... Emus are birds. You raise them for meat.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	  Yeah! Right!  People eat   birds... Bird meat... Now do they just fly into your mouth or you go to... you   go to a restaurant and you say: "Excuse me, I'll have a bucket of fried   bird."  Or... or maybe just a wing or... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Joey, I think you should consider something a little   less risky. I mean, I think in this market, real estate is your best investment.The   Fed. just lowered the rates and the interest on your mortgage is totally deductible.    That's right, I know some stuff!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Real estate, huh? Hmmm...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	  Oh, and you know who's selling a great   apartment? Richard!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	  Oh, and you know whose knowledge   of her ex-boyfriend is shocking? Monica!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 My dad told me. They play golf together.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Oh, well... Maybe I'll join them some time. I just   hope the club doesn't slip out of my hand and beat the moustache off his face.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Hi!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel, Monica	 Hey!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Listen! You have to help me pick a dress 'cause I'm   meeting Mike's parents tonight! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Wow, the boyfriend's parents! That's a big step.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  Really? That hadn't occurred to me.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 They just gonna love you, just be yourself.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 They live on the upper east side on Park Avenue!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Oh yeah, she can't be herself.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Okay, so... allright... Which dress?  You can say "neither".
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel, Monica	 Oh God, neither!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 I'm sorry honey, but we're gonna take you shopping.   It's gonna be fine.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Yeah, totally! You are in such good hands. And I'm   so good with meeting parents. With the father, you know, you want to flirt a   little bit, but not in a gross way. Just kind of like: "Oh mr. Pincer,   I can see where Wallis gets his good looks..."
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 You went out with Wallis Pincer?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Uh, he took the SAT's for me.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 I knew you didn't get a 1400!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Ssshyeah, well, duh! I mean...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 So... now... What about with Mike's mom?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Oh, with the mother, just... just constantly tell   her how amazing her son is. Take it from me, moms love me. Ross's mom one time   actually said I'm like the daughter that she never had.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	   She said WHAT?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  That's she's like   the daughter she never had.  Listen! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Hi.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Hi.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 I just finished getting Phoebe all dressed to meet   Mike's parents. She's so nervous, it's so sweet!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Guess what? I made Emma laugh today.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	  You WHAT? And I missed it? Because   I was giving a makeover to that stupid hippie?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Yeah, and it was uhm... it was like a real little person   laugh too. It was... it was like uhm...    Only... only not creepy.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Well... well, what did you do to make her laugh? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 I uhm... Well, I sang...  well actually   I rapped... Baby Got Back... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 You WHAT? You sang... to our baby daughter... a song   about a guy who likes to have sex with women with giant asses?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 But you know what, if you think about it, it actually   promotes a healthy uhm... body image... because... even big butts or uhm...   juicy doubles.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	  owwwww...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Please don't take her away from me!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Catherine	 Oh hi, come on in. I'm Catherine, the listing agent.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Hi I'm Joey. This is Chandler.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 So how come Richard's selling the place? Went bankrupt?   Medical malpractice? Choked on his own moustache?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Catherine	 Actually, he is buying a much bigger place. It's   got a great view of Central Pa.....
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 mmm That's enough about you!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Is there anything we should know about the apartment?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Catherine	 All the appliances are included. There is a lot   of light, a new kitchen... I think you guys would be very happy here... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 No, no, no, no, no, NO! No, no... we're not together.   We're not a couple. We're definately not a couple.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Catherine	 Oh... Okay, sorry!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Well, you seem pretty insulted by that. What? I'm not   good enough for you? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 We're not gonna have this conversation again...   Look at this place. Why am I so intimidated by this guy? Pretentious art, this   huge macho couch. When we know all he does is sit around all day crying about   losing Monica to a real man!  You don't think he's here, do you? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 You know what it is? It's a nice place but I gotta see   I don't know if I see myself living here. Oh, oh, oh, let me see...  Yeah,   I could see it.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	  Look at these videos. You know, I mean,   who does he think he is? Magnum Force, Dirty Harry, Cool Hand Luke... Oh my   God!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 What?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 There's a tape here with Monica's name on it.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Ooh! A tape with a girls name on it. It's probably a   sex tape...  Wait a minute... This says Monica...  And   this is Richard's apartment... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Get there faster! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Wow! You look like... like my mom.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 I'm wearing pantyhose!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Great! Come on in! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh, thank you! Oh... Oh my God, you're RICH!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 No, my parents are rich.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah, so... They gotta die someday.  HELLO!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Mom, dad, this is Phoebe. Phoebe, these are my parents:   Theodore and Bitsy.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  Theodore... Bitsy... What   a delight!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 It's so nice to finally meet you!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 And you... Your home is lovely.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Well thank you, I'll give you a tour later. It's actually   three floors.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Holy crap!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Phoebe, why don't you come in the living room and meet   our friends?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh, try and stop me!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Hey... Wh... What are you doing?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  I'm trying to get your parents to like   me.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Yeah, I'm sure they will, but you don't have to do this...   I'm wanting them to get to know Phoebe, not  Phoebe...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  Got it! It... It's hard to stop...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Well, come on...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 Phoebe, these are our friends, Tom and Sue Angle.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Phoebe, come sit. Tell us a little bit about yourself...   So where are you from?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  Uhm... Okay, well, allright, uhm... Originally   I'm from upstate, but uhm... then my mom killed herself and my stepdad went   to prison, so... I just moved to the city where uhm... I actually lived in a   burned out Buick LeSabre for a while...  which was okay,   that was okay, until uhm... I got hepatitis, you know, 'cause this pimp spit   in my mouth and... but I... I got over it and uhm... anyway, now I'm uhm...   a freelance massage therapist, uhm... which, you know, isn't always steady money   but at least I don't pay taxes, huh...  So...   where does everyone summer?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 God! God! This is not going well.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 No, no, no, you're doing fine, really... Why don't you   go talk to my dad?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Okay, okay, okay, okay... Still sure about me being   myself?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Absolutely! Or maybe just a little less pimp spit.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 So Theodore... I uhm... I can see where Mike gets   his good looks from...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 Oh... Well...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah... And that physique! You must work out all the   time...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 Oh no, not all the time... I do the best I can...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah I bet! Look out! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 OH! OWWWWW! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh my God, are you okay?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 I recently had surgery.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 I'm so sorry!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 No, I'll be fine... I just should check the stitches...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 I really, really am sorry.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 How could you know. Why wouldn't you punch me in   the stomach? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Uhm... Did you just hit my dad?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yes... I'm sorry, I've never met a boyfriends parents   before...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 But, I mean, you have met... humans before, right? Look,   why don't you go talk to my mom?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah okay... yeah, your mom... okay... She looks nice,   I can talk to her.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Yeah, you do that, and I go check my dad for signs of   internal bleeding. 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah... Oh Bitsy, hi. Uhm... listen I just wanted   to thank you again for having me here tonight.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Well, not at all...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Also uhm... I just want you to know what a wonderful   man your son is.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Thank you, I think so too.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Well, and you know, it really is a testament to how   he was raised. Especially to you. Because he's very respectful of women.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Is he really?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Are you kidding. He is so considerate of my feelings   and... you know I think... you'd also like to know that he is a very gentle   lover.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 E-e-excuse me?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	  Oh no,   no, no, no, no, no. Don't get me wrong. No, he's not in like a sissy way. No,   no, no... when he gets going, he can rattle a headboard like a sailor on leave...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 That's... my boy. 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Awesome!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 I'm not gonna watch it... I don't NEED to watch   it... I mean, what good could possibly come from watching?  Well, we   know I'm gonna watch it. 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Hey dude, what's up?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Don't judge me, I'm only human!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Did you take that tape?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 I had to! Okay, imagine you were married... and   you found a tape of your wife in another guys' apartment... Wouldn't you need   to know what was on it?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 I don't know. Who'm I'm married to?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Some girl...!?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 She hot?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Yeah...!?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 How did she get me to settle down?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Allright, I'm gonna watch it... I mean look, it's   probably not even what I think it is... And even if it is... It can't possibly   be as bad as what I'm picturing in my head...  Can it?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Guess I don't know. My experience: if a girl says yes   to being taped... She doesn't say no to much else, I tell ya...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Then you're gonna have to watch it for me.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	  What? Whoo... What?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Just for a few seconds, so I can know what it is...   Please?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 All right, fine... But if I enjoy this, you have only   yourself to blame... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Why am I hearing cheering?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Well it's okay, its like... its just a football game.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Football? Just football?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 Yeah, see... you were all worried for nothing.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 It's football... It's just football... This is great!   This is the first time I've ever enjoyed football... It may be customary to   get a beer...    What the...    What are you doing?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	 You don't wanna see what I just saw! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 What are you guys doing?  Oh my God, is that Richard? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Okay... aahhh... Please laugh for mommy... Please?   Please laugh for mommy...  Not funny huh? Oh so, is it... only offensive novelty   rap? Or maybe just, you know, rap in general? 'Cause mommy can rap...  My   name is mommy and I'm here to say / that all the babies are... Oh, I can't   rap... Allright sweetheart... This is only because I love you so much, and I   know that you're not gonna tell anybody...  I   like... big butts and I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... / when   a girl walks in with an itty bitty waist and a round thing in your face...  Yes! Yes! Yes! YES! Oohhhhh! Oh!  I like big butts and   I cannot lie... / You other brothers can't deny... Oh Emma you're laughing!   Oh you are, you really do like big butts, don't you. Oh you beautiful little   weirdo... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Hey!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Oh you missed it. She was laughing. Oh it was amazing.   It was amazing. It was the most beautiful, beautiful sound that...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Oh I know, isn't it? Ooh... what'd you do to get her   to laugh?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Oh! You know, I just... couple of things I tried ...   I just sang a little doo... Itsy Bitsy Spider...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 You sang Baby Got Back didn't you?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Nothing else worked. That girl is all about the ass...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 ...and then it goes back to the chorus... Smelly   cat, Sme-lly ca-t / I-t's not your fau-lt. And that's the end of the song...   I realise that you didn't ask to hear it, but uhm... no-one had spoken in seventeen   minutes.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Phoebe writes lots of great songs. Wha... What was that   one you sang the other night that everybody just loved?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh, Pervert Parade?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	  No...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh, Ode To A Pubic Hair?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Stop! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh God! Is that veal?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Mom, I thought I told you... Phoebe's a vegetarian.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Oh!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Oh no, no, no, no... That's okay, that's okay... I   mean, I'm... I am a vegetarian... except for veal... Yeah no, veal I love...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Phoebe you don't have to eat...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 No, no, no, I actually it's any baby animals: kittens,   fish babies... You know... especially veal... and this, this nice vein of fat   running through it...    Hmmm... yummy  Hmmm... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 So...? What do you think? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 So you stole that tape from Richard's apartment?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Whoho ho... Listen to the judgement from the porn   star!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 That tape was never meant to be seen by...    Joey I would feel more comfortable if I was having this conversation in private. 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Joey	  Monica, look... I don't think you and I have   any secrets anymore...  Not ready to joke about   it yet, okay, I see you later. 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Why in the world would you take this tape and and   why would you watch it?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Because that's who I am, okay? I'm sure a mature   man like Richard could see a tape like that and it wouldn't bother him. Just'd   be another saucy anecdote for him to share at his men's club over brandy and   moustaches.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Is all this about you not being able to grow a moustache?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 This is about you and Richard. He's clearly not   over you. He keeps a tape so he can... look at it whenever he wants.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Isn't that sad? I mean, can you see how pathetic that   is? You shouldn't be jealous. You should feel bad for him.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Oh, yeah, well, poor Richard. Y'... I can grow a   moustache!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Chandler, this is not our problem. We've got each   other. That's all that matters.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Yeah, oh, but I just keep picturing you rolling   around with him with your cowboy boots in the air...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 Cowboy boots? I've never worn cowboy boots in my whole   life! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Oh, good, good. Play more, 'cause I wanna see how   it ends.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 THAT'S NOT ME!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 What...? That's not you! Life is good again! Ride   'em cowgirl!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 That bastard taped over me! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Chandler	 Is that a problem? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Monica	 I-It's just so insulting! Big spring for a new blank   tape, Doctor!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 I can't imagine what he sees in her.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 She actually makes me miss that pill-popping ex-wife   of his.  Oh, hello dear...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Hey, what's going on?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 We were just chit-chatting. How's your friend?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 A little better.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 By the way, do you know who's moving back into town?   Tom and Sue's daughter Jen.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Theodore	 You remember her Michael, she's lovely and... well   behaved and... single.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 I'm not interested.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Oh, please darling, let's be honest. You can have all   the... sailor fun you want with that one, but... let's be real...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 All right, stop! You know, all Phoebe has done tonight   is trying to get you to like her. And maybe that hasn't been clear all the time,   but she did her best. And yeah... She's a little different than you are...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 Michael, a pimp spit in her mouth! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 So what? I mean if even I can get past that, it shouldn't   bother you. And you don't have to like her. You just have to accept   the fact that I do. I mean, if you even can't be civil to the woman I love...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Bitsy	 The woman you what? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Yeah... The woman you what?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 The woman I love...  I love you...   Which is probably something I shouldn't say for the first time in front of my   parents... and Tom and Sue...Who are by the way the most sinfully boring I've   ever met in my life...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 I love you too... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 You do?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 YEAH...! How great is this...? 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Wanna get out of here?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 Okay.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Mike	 Mom, dad, thanks for dinner.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Phoebe	 I had a great time.  It was really top drawer.   And here's something rich: thirteen bathrooms in this place... I threw up in   the coat closet... Ta taaa...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 She sweat, wet. got it going like a turbo 'vette.
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 So fellas
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Yeah!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 fellas
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Yeah!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 has your girlfriend got the butt?
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Hell yeah!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 So shake it! 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Shake it!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Shake it!  
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Shake it!
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 Shake that nasty butt...
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Baby got back 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Rachel	 One more time from the top... I like big butts   and I cannot lie, you other br... 
09	07	0907	The One With Ross's Inappropriate Song	Ross	 Rachel please! That is so inappropriate!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Hey Hon, could you help me get the plates down?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Yeah. Hey, here's an idea, why don't we use our  wedding china today?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 No, I think we should save our china for something  really special. Like if the Queen of England comes over.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Honey, she keeps canceling on us, take the hint. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 What if something gets broken, they're so expensive. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 What is the point of having them if we never use  them?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Ok, but if something gets broken, and then the Queen  comes over..
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 I will explain it to her.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 <laughs> Oh yeah, like I'm going to let you  talk to the queen. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 wow, the parade is really good this year. Man those  horses can crap. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Tv Announcer	 Next up is a marching band from Muskogee, OK.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Muskogee! That's like four hours from Tulsa. Woo  hoo!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Tv Announcer	 And heres the float with the stars of the popular daytime soap  Days of Our Lives .
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh my God!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Aren't you one of the stars of the popular daytime  soap Days of Our Lives? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Yeah! I totally forgot I'm supposed to be there. I  can't believe I forgot. I usually write stuff like this on my arm. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 What are you going to do?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 I guess I'm going to have to come up with a really  good reason why I wasn't there. The producers are going to be so mad at me.  They sat us all down yesterday and said "Everyone has to be there at 6:00  AM sharp, that means you Tribbiani." Like.. like I was some kind of idiot. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Well you proved them wrong.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey Nods	 Yeah.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel To Emma	 Oh Emma. This is going to be your first Thanksgiving. What  are you thankful for? Mommy's bobbies. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 A lot of people are thankful for those.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Woman At Door	 Hello? Rachel? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Who is it? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Woman At Door	 It's your favorite sister.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross, Rachel While Looking At Each Other Surprised, Shocked	 Jill?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Woman At Door In A Sing Song Voice	 Amy.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Hide my rings.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh. <opens door preparing herself and then happily  says> 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Do you have a hair straightener? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Um... hi.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 oh... hi.. <goes to Rachel with open arms>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Aw. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Hair Straightener?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 I haven't seen you in like.. a year.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh, I know, I know. I've just been crazed.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh well yeah me too. Um.. I had a baby. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 I decorated Dad's office. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh.. yeah? Well unless you pushed a desk out of your  vagina, <shakes head no> not the same thing.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Listen, um about the hair straightener, honey.. I really  need one. I'm going to have dinner at my boyfriend's house. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh my God!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 mh hmm.. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Is this Emmett? <pointing to EMMA>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Uh.... its Emma.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Its a girl?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Hey Amy. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh Amy, you remember Ross.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Not really. But you are much cuter then that geeky guy  she used to date.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 That was me.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No, he was this creepy guy from high school who had  this huge crush on her since like the ninth grade. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross With A Look Of Wondering How Long This Is Going To Go On On His Face	  Still me.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No, I'm not talking about you. <to Rachel> It  was your fat 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross Starts Talking Over Her 'Do You Remember' Line	 Amy. I'm going to save  you some time, ok. <spins finger around in circle> All me. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Careful. <hands Chandler a china plate> Careful.  CAREFUL! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 I'll tell you what, for the rest of our lives,  I'll be careful until told otherwise. <looks at china> hey wait a minute  this isn't the china we picked out.. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 I know, after you left the store, I chose different  ones.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Why?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 well no offense honey, but your taste is a little  feminine for me.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh suddenly, flowers are feminine?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Hey, everybody. Happy Thanksgiving!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Hey happy Thanksgiving.. Pheebs! <motions her to  come over> 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Hey, what's going on Joe? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 I.. I.. I need a good lie.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Oh okay. How about the whole "man walking on  the moon" thing. You know? You. you could. You could see the strings people! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 No, no, no I need a good lie to explain why I wasn't  at a work thing today.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Ooh, honey. You stink at lying. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 I do not.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Oh really. Okay. let me ask you something. Yesterday  at the coffee house, I went to the bathroom and when I came back, my muffin  was gone-who took it?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Somebody opened the door to the coffee house and a  raccoon came running in, went straight for your muffin and I said "Hey  don't eat that-that's Phoebe's" and he said.. <pause> He said.. "Joey  you stink at lying." What am I going to do? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Don't worry, don't worry. We'll come up with a good  lie. I'll help you practice it.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh great, that'd be great. Thank you. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Sure, what.. what was the work thing? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Uh.. <forgetting what the work thing was, rolls  up his sleeve on his right arm and shows Phoebe, she looks>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 "Pick up grandma at the airport"?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh.. man..
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy With Straight Hair	 Oh she's precious. Do you ever worry she's going to  get your real nose? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Amy! <pause> Yes I do.. I really do. <grabs  Ross' hand for support>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Hello? Yeah, um. Hang on one sec. <to Ross and Rachel> Can  I take this upstairs? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Sure, we don't live there but...
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Seriously? Its.. its just these rooms? <moves hands  around motioning 'just these rooms'> <To Ross> I thought you were  a doctor. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Yeah, no. Ross has a PhD.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Ew. <walks into Rachel's room, I'm guessing>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 God she is unbelievable.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 I know, I mean a PhD is just as good as an MD.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh sure Ross, yeah. If I have a heart attack in a  restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Storms Out	 Stupid Thanksgiving.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 What? What happened? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 My boyfriend canceled on me. I mean.. I I finally find  a real relationship. I mean, someone that I can spend this day with and then  his wife comes back into town. I swear, its almost not worth dating married  guys. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Don't say that.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh. I was so looking forward to this. It was going to  be such a beautiful Thanksgiving. We were going to have sushi. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh Amy, don't cry Amy.  Um.. Ross, could I talk  to you in private?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Sure, you want to go upstairs?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Um look I was thinking.. If its ok with Monica I  would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 You know, I think thats a great idea. It'll be like  the pilgrims bringing the Indians syphilis.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Look I know she's a little tough to take. She has  no where else to go, and she's my sister. Alright, she's Emma's aunt. And I  would like them to bond. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Ok, fine, but I don't want them bonding to much. I  don't want her telling Emma she needs a nose job. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Ross, you know what? She may need one..We're just  going to have to make our peace with that! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel Opens Their Door	 Hi.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Everyone There Says	 Hi, hey.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Hey you guys, this is my sister Amy.  This is  Chandler, Joey, Phoebe and you know Mon. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Everyone	 Hi.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh my god. You're on Days of Our Lives. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey Laughs	 Yeah.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 wow. They must put a lot of makeup on you. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey Looks Rejected	 Hap.. Hap.. Happy Thanksgiving.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross To Monica	 Hi.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica To Ross	 Hi.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica To Emma	 Hey you.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica To Amy	 So. Welcome. Is this your first time you're  seeing Emma? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy With Confused Look On Face	 Yeah I.. I think so. <sticks her hand out  to shake hands with Phoebe and says to her> It's nice to meet you Emma. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe Shakes Her H, Says	 Phoe-Be.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh. That's a funny noise. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Pheebs, I still need some help here
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Oh right, ok um. Ok so its not just the lie you tell.  but its the way you tell it. . For example if you look down at the ground when  you're talking, people know you're lying. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh.. I don't know why this is so hard for me. you know..  I mean lying is basically just acting and I am a terrfic actor. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe Looks Down	 You are a terrific actor. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Coming Out Of The Bathroom	 Hey. Hey where's the baby?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Oh we just put her down for a nap.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh I was just thinking. You know what would be incredible?  If you guys died. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross First Has A Look Of 'Huh' Then Changes It To Sarcastic Happy	 Thank you  Amy. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 no, no, then I would get the baby. I mean you know it  would be just like a movie. Like at first I wouldn't know what to do with her,  then I would rise to the occasion and and then I would get a makeover and then  I'd get married. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Thats a great movie. <she claps>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Now listen, not that you guys could stop me or anything  cause you know you'd be dead. I was thinking about changing her name. I'm just  not really a big fan of Emily. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Emma. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Turns Around To Phoebe	 Emma, Ross wants you. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 PHOE-BE.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Turns To Ross, Rachel	 Why does she keep making that  noise? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um,  if something were to happen to Ross or to myself <Ross and Rachel knock  on wood> um you wouldn't get the baby. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Well who would?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Well we haven't offically asked them yet, but we would  want Monica and Chandler. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 I can't believe you'd want us to raise Emma. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 yeah oh my god, I'm so moved. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 I don't believe this, hold on a second. You guys die  and I don't get your baby? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 See look Amy, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler.  We see them every day. And truthfully honey, you don't seem very connected  to the baby.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Connected? I mean.. to what? She's.. she's  a lump. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 You know, guys I got to say. This means so much  to me. That you would trust me with your child. I mean, we all know that Monica  and I have been trying to have a baby of our own. You know I've had my doubts  about my skills as a father, but that you two.. that you two.... <starts  to cry>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 <points to Chandler> This guy? Seriously? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Okay! It's time for dinner. Everyone we're using  our fancy china.. um and its very expensive so please be careful.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross Starts Playing With A Plate	 Woah. Woah... <nearly really drops the  plate and more seriously> Woah. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Okay, just to be clear comedy with the plates will  not be well recieved. <pinches Ross' arm>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Hey! How come my plate's less fancy then everyone else's?  Do you not trust me with a fancy plate? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 No, honey, its. thats a special plate.  See  its a game, whoever gets that plate wins. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 I can't believe I won.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Its such a slap in the face. I'm your sister and you  would give your baby to these strangers over me.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Monica is Ross' sister. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No, Ross' sister was really fat. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 That was me. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No, she was this really dorky girl in high school that  used to follow Rachel around like a puppy dog. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Hey. Amy. You've got to stop doing that.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica About To Have A Heart Attack	 Okay, listen I know you're having a little  bit of a family crisis, but you don't have to take it out on the plates. I  mean, I mean in fact I think that everyone should cut their food like this. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Now see, this way you protect the plate.. and lets  face it you have fun. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Okay, how about this, you guys die and the crazy plate  lady dies, then do I get the baby?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 No, if crazy plate lad.. <sees Monica frustrated  at this comment> If Monica dies then I would get Emma, Right?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Well actually...
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Actually what? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 well.. its just. its just in that case, then um. Emma  would go to my parents. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 What?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Hurts, doesn't it? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey Raises His Hand	 Uh.. who has to die for me to get her? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 So if Monica's not around, then I'm not good enough  to raise Emma? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross Looks Down	 No,  that that is not what we're saying.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Yeah he's lying. He looked down. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Well what is wrong with me? Am I .. am I incomptent?  Because I managed to survive whatever it is that killed the three of you! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Honey, you're taking this the wrong way. We think  you're going to be a wonderful parent. It's just.. you're more the fun parent. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Yeah and we'd want to make sure Emma has someone like  Monica who is more uh. uh discliplinarin.. someone who can be firm and strict. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Thats not how you see me, is it? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe While Cutting A Sweet Potatoe In The Air	 No you're all about the fun. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Look, I may not know a lot about babies, but do  you really think I'm not capable? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 No, you both are equally capable. Its just.. you're  strongest when.. when you're together. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Ok. So if we both had Emma and I die <knocks  on table>  she'd have to give her up. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Sure, Monica would have to give her up. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 I lie better then that, right?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 So.. let me get this straight. So my two friends  die, I get Emma. Then my wife dies, then Emma the one tiny ray of hope left  in my life gets taken away from me?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 There's your movie! <claps> 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Hey. There you are. You disappeared after dinner. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh? Did somebody miss me? Is there a child to raise  poorly? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Ross and Rachel don't know what they're talking about.  I mean its not like their so responsible. Emma is a product of a bottle of  Merlot and a five year old condom. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Yeah but they're right. I mean, I'm not a strong  father figure and I never will be. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 No you learn these things. You grow into it.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Yeah, but its not who I am. Everything they said  was exaclty why I was worried about having a kid. And its true. And look everybody  knows it. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 I don't know it! I want to have a kid with you because  I think you're going to be an amazing dad... at the fun parts and the hard  parts. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh yeah, well can you picture me saying "Go  to your room! You're grounded"? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Can you hear me say "You're grounded"?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 You said that to me last week. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 How hard is it? No shoes on the furniture. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey Groans, Gets Off The Phone	 The producer from Days left a message  on my machine asking why I wasn't at the parade. They said everybody's pissed  off at me.. <whiny voice> And they all got to meet Santa! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 It's ok. I thought of the perfect lie for you. It's  easy to remember and doesn't invite a lot of questions. You weren't at the  parade because you had a family emergency. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh, I like that, yeah. Wasn't at the parade because  I had a family emergency.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Ooh, what happened? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey All Nervous, Looking Down, Fiddling With His Ear	 Oh.. My sister's  raccoon.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 No! Nothing with a raccoon. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Arg... Alright, I'll take care of it. <throws hands  out in the air>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Oh wait.. What are you doing? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Setting the table. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Yeah we thought it would be nice to use the fancy  china for dessert too. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Oh how nice. Maybe later we can all go blow our noses  on my wedding dress. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Hey dude, you okay? Sorry about before.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh no thats okay, you're totally right. I don't  know anything about disciplining a child. But it did hurt my feelings and I  want you to know that when I die, you don't get Joey. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Walks Over To The Couch, Sits Down Next To Rachel	 Ucch.  <pauses> Uchh <louder  this time> In case you hadn't noticed, I'm not talking to you. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 UCHH! <much louder and longer then Amy's>
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 You know.. this.. this is classic Rachel.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Yeah.. yeah right.. Remember in high school when  I died and didn't give you my baby?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 This might be my one chance to have a baby Rachel. I  mean, you know that I have been so busy focusing on my carrer. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 What? What carrer? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Um.. I'm a decorator. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Ok. You decorate dad's office and so now you're a  decorator. Okay! I went to the zoo yesterday and now I'm a koala bear. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Why can't you ever be supportive? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Sup.. You want to talk supportive? You didn't even  come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh. Yeah. Well.. You didn't come see me when I was in  the hospital when I was getting my lips done. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 I did the first time! Oh. Oh.. <gets up and walks  into the kitchen> And you know what. You want to know why I'm not giving  Emily to you.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Emma. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel Turns To Ross	 Oh whose side are you on? <back  to Amy> I'm not giving you Emma because there is no way you could handle  the responibility of a child. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 How hard could it be? You do it. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 ooh oooh.. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Do you want to know why you don't want  me to have  the baby? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 uh huh.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Because you don't want me to be happy. You.. you have  always been jealous of me. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Jealous of what? Of your lack of responsiblity? You,  your immaturity? Your total disregard of other people's feelings? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Uh.. To name a few.  You know.. You know.. You've  just always been like this. You just have to have everything. And I couldn't  have anything. Like in junior high, when you stole Timmy from me. I mean, do  you even realize how much that hurt me? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Timmy was my boyfriend and you made out with him!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Oh come on, that was 20 years ago. Get over it.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 I cannot, I cannot believe that I invited you here  today.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Yeah, well you know what I cannot believe. That my so-called  sister, gets a 30% discount from Ralph Lauren and I still have to pay retail.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 ah ha ha. ah ha ha. <evil meancing laughter> It's  forty five. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 You bitch. You just think you're so perfect. With your  new baby and your, your small apartment. <directs this to Ross who in turns  throws the towel in his hand down on the table> Well let me tell you something.  Your baby isn't even that cute. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross Walks Over	 Too far, Amy. Too far. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 You take that back.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Take it back!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 No! What are you going to do? Make me?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Heey man, I work out. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 So do I.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 I do pilates. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 I do yoga.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Bring it on! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Put the plates in the boxes!! Put the plates in the  boxes! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Did you just push me?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 Uh, yeah I think I did. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Alright. Thats it! <Pushes Amy back> 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica Screaming At Ross	 Forget the bubblewrap! There isn't  time! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel Starts Messing Up Amy'S Hair	 Frizzy frizzy frizzy frizzy!! 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Oh my god! Shouldn't we stop this?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 What? Are you out of your mind? Lets throw some jello  on them. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Ew! Gross. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Alright! That is it. This is our apartment and  you can not behave this way. Now if you can't act your age then you shouldn't  be here at all. Now those plates may not be as nice as the pretty pink ones  I picked out, but they're very important to Monica. I want you to apologize  to her right now. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 I'm sorry.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Mon, I'm so sorry. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Okay. Thats better. Now I want you to both apologize  to each other and mean it. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy, Rachel At Same Time	 Sorry.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 By the way, that fight was totally arousing. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 Dude. Well done. You know what? If I die, and Rachel  dies and Monica dies then you can totally take care of Emma. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh yeah? Well thanks. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Ross	 So, so now do I get Joey?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Okay, but you should know he eats five times a  day and shoves pennies up his nose. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Are you okay Mon? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 uh huh.. I mean these things happen. Its' just a  plate. Its not like somebody died. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 It's all right. You can mourn. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica Starts Crying	 Thank you. It was so beautiful. <gets up and walks  towards the front door> I'm going to go to Joeys and get the pies. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Actually its not pies, its just pie. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 I don't care. <pauses and realizes...> Oh my  god. I've lost the will to scold. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Look Amy, it got a little of control..Um.. and I'm  sorry. You're my sister and uh.. if it really means that much to you.. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy	 So you're going to give me the baby?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 Uh. No.. I was going to let you use my Ralph Lauren  discount. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Amy Starting To Cry	 You are not going to regret this. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Rachel	 She needs changing.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Oh no no no.. I'll get her. I'm super-compentent  and totally responsibile and fourth in line to raise Emma. I'll be right there  Emma. Just let me get my trusty diaper bag here. <knocks over the box of  china> Well.. what do you know? I guess, I'll be the one who dies first.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Hey, does Monica know about her broken plates yet?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Nope...
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 Broke them all, huh?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Yep...
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 You gonna tell her?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Nope...  Hey... so I'm gonna...  put the plates back. You know, I think you were right, I don't think we should  use these plates again for a looong time.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Like only if the queen comes?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Chandler	 Maybe not even then. 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Hey! I did it. I called my producer. I told him I had  a family emergency, he totally bought it. Thanks for teaching me how to lie  Pheebs.
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Phoebe	 No problem! Next week: stealing... 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 Bye plates!
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Oh, you told her you broke all the plates, huh? 
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Monica	 What? Something happened with the plates?
09	08	0908	The One With Rachel's Other Sister	Joey	 Uhm...  Yeah... this uhm... raccoon came  in...
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Jo Lynn	 This kitty is Mittens and this one is Fitzhugh, and this little guy   in the cat condo is Jinkies.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Yep.  That's a lot of cats Jo Lynn.  Single are ya?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Chandler Bing.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Hey.  How come you're answering your own phone?  Where's your crazy assistant?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 What's up Joe?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Okay, what have we always wanted to do together?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Braid each other's hair and ride horseback on the beach?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 No, no, no.  When you get home tomorrow night, you and I are going to   be at the Wizzards-Knicks game . . .  courtside!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Courtside?  Oh my God.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Yeah.  Maybe Michael Jordon will dive for the ball and break my jaw with   his knee.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 That's so cool.  I'll let Monica know.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Hello?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Joey just called.  He's got courtside Knicks tickets for him and   me tomorrow night.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Really?  But tomorrow night is the only night I get off from the restaurant.    If you go to the game, we won't have a night together for another week.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 But hey, it's courtside.  The cheerleaders are going to be right   in fr. . .   That's not the way to convince you. 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Chandler look, I don't want to be one of those wives who says, "You   can't go to the game.  You have to spend time with me."  So, if you could just   realize it on your own . . . 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 I know.  You're right.  I want to see you too.  I've just got to   figure out a way to tell Joey, you know?  He's really looking forward to this.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Tell him that you haven't seen your wife in a long time.  Tell him   that having a long-distance relationship is really difficult.  Tell him that   what little time we have is precious.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Yeah, ah, ah . . .  I'll think of something.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Wow!    Wow, You look . . . uh . . .   It's just, ah . . .   That   dress . . . uh . . .  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Well, I hope the ends of these sentences are good.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Well, well, they're good.  It's been a while since I've seen you like   this.  You, you clean up good.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh well, well thank you.    Okay,   stop.  Stop looking at me like that.  The last time that happened,  that happened.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Oh right, right.    So, are you . . . ah . . . you excited about your, your first night   away from Emma?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah.  Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun.  And thank   you for watching the baby, by the way.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Oh, it's fine.  Actually, I, I invited Mike over.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Phoebe's Mike?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 I didn't know you guys hung out.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 We don't.  But I thought it would be nice to get to know him.  You know,   maybe have a little dinner, drinks, conversation.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh that's so cute:  Ross and Mike's first date.  Is that going to be   awkward?  I mean, what are you guys going to talk about?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 I don't know.  But, you know, we, we have a lot in common, you know.    He plays piano; I played keyboards in college.  He's been divorced; I have some   experience in that area.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Hi
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Hey.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Oooh.  Girl's night out indeed.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  Ok.  So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night,   but if you need anything Ross . . . 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Rach, Rach, we'll be fine, all right?  You go have fun.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Okay.  You too.  And I hope you score.   Bye.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Bye.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 So . . .  Welcome.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  I got beer.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 I got bottled breast milk.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Eh, why don't we start with the beer?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Okay.    So, um, Phoebe tells me you, ah, you play piano.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 You know, I, I used to, ah, play keyboards in college.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Ah?    Do you have one here?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 No.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Okay.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Um . . . ah . . . you know, I'm divorced.  Um, Phoebe, ah . . . Phoebe   said you . . . You've been divorced?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Yeah.    Yeah, I'm sorry.  I don't . . . I don't really like to   talk about it.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	  That's okay.  We'll talk about  something else.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  So, you're a paleontologist, right?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 My cousin's a paleontologist.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Ah?    Well, he and I would probably have   a lot to talk about.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Hi.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Hey.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Welcome home.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	   Oh well, look at you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Yeah.  What do you think?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Well, it looks great.  It's just that . . . well, I'm wearing the   same thing underneath.  So . . .
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Oh.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 See what I mean . . . 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Hey!  How come the door's locked?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Just a second.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  No, no, no, no, no.  Joey can't know that I'm here.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Why not?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Because I didn't know how to tell him that I couldn't go to the Knicks   game.  So, I just told him that I had to stay in Tulsa.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 So, you lied to him?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Achhh.  It's always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.      Except with you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Hey!  Open the door.  What's going on?  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 What are you . ..    Why are you dressed   like that?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Oh, because, um . . .  well, Chandler's going to be home in a couple   of days.  So, I thought I would, you know, practice the art of seduction.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Oh, I thought I heard a man's voice before.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Oh I was just doing Chandler's side of the conversation.  You know,   like, "Hi, How do I look?"   "Really sexy.  Could I BE any more   turned on?"
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Okay.      Whoa, whoa.  Why are there two glasses of wine out?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Because. . .  one of them is for you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Cheers.    Okay, buh-bye.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 You know, it's funny.  I've been, ah, practicing the art of seduction   myself.    Hi ya.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 You might want to keep practicing.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Yah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 It's Joey.    Hey Joe.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Dude, come home!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 What? Why?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 COME . . .  HOME.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Look I, I can't.  What's going on?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 I don't know how to tell you this but, uh . . . I think Monica's cheatin'   on ya.  I told you shouldn't have married someone so much hotter than you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 All right look.    If you can't come home and   deal with this, then I'm gonna.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 NO!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	  I just heard him!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  Can you . . . hear him . . . now?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	   No.   All right, I'm going in.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 No! Wait!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 I heard him again!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  All right, look.  Just stay there.  I'm   coming home.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Okay.  Great.  I'll see you when you get here.  I'm gonna wait out in   the hall in case the dude comes out.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Is that really necessary?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Absolutely.  You'd do it for me.  Not that you ever have to because I   know how to keep my women satisfied.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Shouldn't the pizza be here by now?  I mean, they said thirty minutes   or less.  Well, how long has it been?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  Eleven minutes.    And now twelve.    So, do you like the beer?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 I do.  I do.  Although, it's actually a lager.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 huh.    What's the difference between beer and lager?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 I don't know.  We could look it up.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  Things are about to get wild.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Oh God.  Remember the girls' nights we used to have sitting around   talking about you and Ross?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh God.  It seems like forever ago.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 I know.     So, what's going on with you and Ross?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Well, um . . . I don't know.  I mean, for a long time nothing.  But   you know, actually right before you picked me up, Ross and I had a . . . ah   . . . little thing.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Oh my God!  I love things.  What happened?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Well, um, first he told me he liked how I looked.  And, ah, then we   had a little . . . um . . . eye-contact.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Eye-contact?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Mm-hmm.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 I hope you were using protection.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Waiter	   Excuse me.  Um, these are from the two   gentlemen at the end of the bar.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh.   Should we send them something back?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Oooh.  Let's do.  Let's send them mashed potatoes.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 No!  Wait!  No, no.  Don't do that!  That's going to make them think   they can come over here.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 So?  What if they do?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Well, we're not here to meet guys.  You have a boyfriend, I have a   b. . . baby and a Ross.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Yeah, but, ah, ah, nothing has to happen.  We're just having fun.    You know, not everything had to go as far as "eye-contact."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Chandler, you have to tell Joey that you're not in Tulsa.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Don't you think it's better for him to think that you're cheating   on me, than for him to think that I'm cheating on him?    I heard it.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 I don't want him to think that I'm having an affair.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 All right.  I've got a plan.  I'll go down the fire escape.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Yes, because all good plans start with, "I'll go down the fire escape."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Hear me out woman.  I'll go down the fire escape.  Then, I'll wait   for a while.  Then, when I come up the stairs, it'll be just like I just got   back from Tulsa.  Then, Joey and I will come in and see that there's no guy   in here.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Aren't you afraid that Joey's going to figure all of this out?      I heard it.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 I'm just going to wait for a little while.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Scary pigeon's back?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 It's huge.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh my God.  I can't believe you live in that building.  My grandmother   lives in that building.  Ida Green?  No sense of personal space?  Kind of smells   like chicken?  Looks like a potato.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 "Spuds" is your grandmother?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 That's my bubby!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Kevin	 So, we're on our way to a couple of parties.  Um. . . maybe we can get   your numbers and give you guys a call if we find something fun.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Yeah. . . I'm sorry.  We weren't really looking for anything to happen   with you guys.  I, I have a boyfriend.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Kevin	 All right. It's no big deal.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 So, she has a boyfriend. What is your situation?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh, well, it's complicated. I don't actually have a boyfriend.  But   um. . .
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 Then, can I have your number?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  I'm sorry, no.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 Okay. 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh sure.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Oh my God, you're giving your real number.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 Okay, thanks. I'll give you a call later tonight.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Great.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Bill	 Bye
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Bye.  Wow. So, that's great. You, Bill, Ross, and Emma   are going to be so happy together. What were you thinking?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 I don't know.  He was cute, and he liked me.  It was an impulse.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 What about Ross?  What about your moment?  Don't you want to talk to   Ross about it?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 No.  No, because I know exactly how the conversation's gonna go.  "Hey   Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  "Yeah."    "Me too."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  "Well, but I'm not sure I really want to do anything about   it."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  "Yeah."   "Me neither." 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  "Well, should we just continue to live together and not   really tell each other how we're really feeling?"
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  "Yeah.  That works for me." 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Yeah, I see what you mean.  By the way, nice Ross imitation.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh, thanks.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 But, your Rachel wasn't whiny enough.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  Wha. . . hey!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Better!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Well, the point is, maybe I should just stop waiting around for moments   with Ross, you know?  I should just . . . move on with my life.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Really?  You're moving on from Ross?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 I don't know.  Do I have to decide right now?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Well, you kind of just did.  That guy is going to call you tonight.    Ross is going to pick up the phone and that's a pretty clear message.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh God, Ross.  Ross is going to pick up the phone.  Oh, I have to get   my number back.    Oh my God.    He's gone.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  "Oh, I have to get my number back.  Oh my God.    He's gone."   Dead on.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  Ya know, I'm going to take off.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 So soon?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Well, yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Okay.  Well, thanks, ah, thanks for the beer.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Ah, you mean lager.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Ah yeah.  Good times.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  Oh.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Hello?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Hey, Mike, it's me.  Listen,   is um, is Ross near you?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Uh, no.  I just left.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Well, you have to go back in.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Wha . . .?  Go back?  To the "land where time stands still"?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 I'm so sorry honey, but, okay, Rachel gave this guy her number and,   um, she doesn't want Ross to answer the phone.  So, you have to intercept all   his calls.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 I can't do that!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  He says he can't do that.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh give me , , ,    Hi, Mike?  Hi.    Listen.  I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what?  If you do this I .   . . Phoebe will . . . do anything you want.  Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 All right.   Hello?  Hi.  I'm sorry   about her, but she wasn't wrong about the dirty stuff.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 All right.  I'll do it.      But really, how much dirtier can it get?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Oh, Mike.  Bye.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Hey buddy.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Uh, hi.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Um, can I come back in?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	   Why?  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  I, I was just thinking about how much more we   have to talk about.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	  But you left.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Wow!  That didn't take long.  I thought you said Tulsa was, like a three   hour flight.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  Well, you're forgetting about the time difference.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	  Chandler!  You're home!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 That's right.  You're husband's home.  So, now the sex can stop.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 What are you saying?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Joey said that you're in here with another man.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 There's no man in here.  How dare you accuse me of that.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 All right.  All right.  Then, maybe you won't mind if me and my friend   take a look around, huh?    Bwa-ah-ah!
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  What is he doing?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	  I arranged some pillows on the bed to look like a guy.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	  Bedroom is clear, although you might need some new pillows.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 All right.  Well, I'll check the guest room.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	   Why do I smell men's cologne?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	  I think that's you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	   Oh yeah.  I rubbed a magazine on myself earlier.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 There's nobody here Joe.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 I guess not.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 I can't believe you thought I was cheating.   You   own me an apology.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Yeah, right Monica.  I'm so sorry.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	  Ah, it's an honest mistake.  It could   happen to anyone.  All right, see ya.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	  Whoa,   whoa.  Wait a minute.  Wait a minute.  If you just got back from Tulsa, how   did your suitcase beat you here?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	  I climb down the fire escape and you   can't put that in the closet?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 So, except for the fermentation process, beer and ale are basically the   same thing.  Fascinating isn't it.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Maybe you should look up "fascinating."
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 I'll get it.    Hello?  Ross's place.  Mike speaking.      It's for you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	  I don't understand what just happened   here.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 What's going on?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 I'm sorry.  I, I told you I was in Tulsa because I wanted to spend   the night with Monica and I, I didn't know . . .  I didn't think you'd understand.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 What? You think I'm too dumb to understand that a husband needs to be   with his wife?  Huh?  Do you think I'm like, "Duh."  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Joey?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Yeah?  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 I don't know what to say.  We shouldn't have lied to you.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Yeah.  I feel so bad.  Is there anything I can do to make it up to   you?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	  Yeah, you could go to the game with me, ah, even though I know   you said you couldn't.  But then you lied to me and tricked me and gave me a   bump on the head.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 I'm sorry.  That's the one thing I can't do.  I promised I'd be with   Monica.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 All right.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	  You can go.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 What?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 You should go to the game.  It's okay.  I want you to.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Really?  You're gonna be okay?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Yeah, I'll be fine.  You know, maybe I'll stay here and practice the   art of seduction.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 You're gonna put on sweats and clean, aren't you?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 It's gonna be so hot!  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Okay, bye.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Monica	 Have fun.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Thanks.    Here's your ticket.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Hey, listen.  I'm never going to lie to you again, okay?  And I want   you to know that nobody thinks you're stupid.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Thanks man.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Joey	 Where are you going?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Chandler	 Game's tomorrow night Joe.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Hi.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Oh God.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh . . . 
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 I'm so glad you're back.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Oh.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Wow.  So, what did you guys do?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Oh, you know . . . we just drank some beer and Mike played with the boundaries   of normal social conduct.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 It's true.  I did.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	  Well, good bye.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 That was fun Pheebs.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 I know.  That was fun.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 See you guys.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Rachel, lock the door.  Lock the door,  seriously.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh shoot.  I forgot to pay Phoebe for the drinks.    Wait, wait.  Sorry.  Did he call?    Did that guy call?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 No.  Just his mom.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh, around 8:30?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Then, again at 9:00?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  uh-huh.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Yeah.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Hello.    Ah, no, she's not here right now.  Can I take a message?      Bill from the bar?    Okay, "Bill from the bar."    I'll make sure she gets your number.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Aaah.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 So, ah . . . So, how was it?   Uh, did you guys. . . Did you guys have   a good time?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	 Oh, it was so much fun.  It felt so good to be out.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	  Uh, Rach.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Rachel	  Yeah?
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	   Never   mind.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Ross	 Hey you guys.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	 Hey.
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Phoebe	 Hey.  I'll be right back.  I've got to go to the bathroom.  
09	09	0909	The One With Rachel's Phone Number	Mike	  Stout.  That's a kind of beer.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 ...sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle;and away they all flew like the down of a thistle; but I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight, "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a goodnight!"
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	  Wow, that was great! You really wrote that?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	  Uh-huh.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  Say goodbye elves, I'm off to Tulsa.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 I can't believe you're not gonna be here for Christmas.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 You're really not coming back?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Yeah, we have all this paperwork that needs to be filed by the end of the year. If I don't get it done, I'll be fired.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 It's so unfair, you don't even like your job!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 So, who does?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Oh, I like my job.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 I *love* my job.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Yeah, I can't *wait* to go back to work.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 I can't get *enough* dinosaurs!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I'm sorry, I won't be here.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 It's just... It's hard enough not seeing you during the week, but for Christmas... alright, if this is what you have to do, I understand.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Thanks.  I'll see you New Year's Day.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	  You're not gonna be here New Year's Eve??
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Did I not mention that?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 No!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 All right everybody, I know that it's Christmas Eve and you'd rather be with your families, but there's *no* call  for writing "Screw you, Mr. Bing!" on the back of my chair!  -- By the way, you can all call me Chandler.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Hey!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Others	 Hey.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Hey. Where've you been?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 I was, uh, checking out that insurance company's Christmas party on three, oh, it was really beautiful, they have all these decorations and this huge tree and I just, uh... to hell with them, we have to work. -- So I stole ther ham. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  You hear that? You may not be with your families, but at least it's gonna smell like ham in here.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Claudia	 My kid's in a play right now.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Y'know what, I know what will cheer you guys up!  I had a little talk with the boys in New York, told 'em about all the hard work you've been doing and that a little Christmas bonus may be in order.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ken	  "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet".
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, that's like money in your pocket! - Alright look, you want me to say it? This sucks. Being here sucks! This work sucks!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 *Now* it feels like Christmas.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I'm sorry. Hey, at least you guys get to go home and be with your families tonight. I have to go back to an empty hotel room and lay down on a very questionable bedspread. And then tomorrow morning, you get to have Christmas morning in your own houses, wich, by the way, none of you have invited me to.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ken	 You can come to my house!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Haha, no thanks!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 That was a nice pep-talk.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Oh, thanks! I'm... actually thinking about becoming a motivational speaker.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 So, if you were home right now, what would you be doing?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Typical Christmas-y stuff, you know? Our holidays are pretty traditional...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 So here is a, a very special holiday song that I wrote for some very important people to me. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Okay, Pheebs, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I can save you time ladies, I'm right here.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Yeah, Chandler why don't you take a walk? This doesn't concern you.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 What? That's terrible!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 No-no, we do it every year!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Oh well, that, that makes it not terrible.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 No, yeah, we never find them! She's always best at us, that wily... minx.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Don't worry, we're just gonna search here for an hour, and then we're gonna go over to Joey's and search, OK?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 No not okay, you can't look for Monica's presents!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Oh no, we have to!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 No, you don't have to, and you can't because I, I live here too.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Well then, you should look with us.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Why?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 No, I have a great idea for a present for her.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Oh, that's it?  A great idea! Oh yeah.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Chandler, that's not enough. I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? And you've just gotten her one great present? I mean that's just gonna make her feel bad. Why would you do that to her Chandler? Why? Why?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 If I help, we can find 'em faster!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 That's right!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Ooh ooh, we have a live one!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Oh, it's a Macy's bag!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Oh.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Ooh, who's it for?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	  "Dear losers, do you really think I'd hide presents under the couch? P.S.: Chandler, I knew they'd break you."
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Rach, these are for you.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Wiper blades. I don't even have a car.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 No, but with this new car smell, you'll think you do.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 OK, Pheebs, your turn.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Ahh, toilet seat covers! Is that what you were doing while I was getting gas?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Uh-huh.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 You guuuyys.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 And for Ross, Mr. Sweet-tooth.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 You got me a cola drink?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 And, a lemon lime.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Well this, this is too much, I feel like I should get you another sweater.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 And last but not least.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 They're ribbed for *your* pleasure.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Ooh, hey Ben, what if the Holiday Armadillo told you all about the Festival of Lights?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ben	 Cool!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Yeah!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Come on Ben.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Years and years ago there were these people called the Maccabees...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ben	 Santa! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Hey! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 What are you doing here, Santa?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, I'm here to see my old buddy Ben. What are you doing here, weird...turtle-man?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 I'm the Holiday Armadillo, your part-Jewish friend. You sent me here to give Ben some presents. Remember?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 What?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay Ben, why don't you come open some more presents, and Santa, the Armadillo and I have a little talk in the kitchen? There's a sentence I'd never thought I'd say.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	  What are you doing?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 You called everyone and said you were having trouble finding a Santa costume, so I borrowed one from a guy at work!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Thank you, but, but you, you gotta leave.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Why?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Because, I'm finally getting him excited about Hanukkah, and, and you're-you're wrecking it.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 But I didn't get to shake my belly like a bowl full of jelly.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 I'm sorry Chandler, but this, this is really important to me.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Fine, I'll give the suit back.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	  Hey, you think, you can keep it another night? 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Santa? Really?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Yeah, is that okay?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Did your Dad ever dress up like Santa?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 No.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Then it's okaaay! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 You know what, everybody? Go home. You should be with your families. It's bad enough that we're working New Year's Eve.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Did I not tell *anyone* about New Year's Eve? -- Alright, look, go! Go home, okay? Merry Christmas! Go.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Good, God's speed, good people!  You're not gonna go?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Naah... I couldn't leave you alone.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ah. Thanks.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Besides, I can't leave until their Christmas party downstairs clears out; there are some *pissed off* insurance people looking for that ham.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ah.  Chandler Bing.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Hi Honey! We're all here; we just want to wish you a Merry Christmas.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Others	  Merry Christmas! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	  Ble-blah-blar Blargh!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ahh, Merry Christmas; I miss you guys!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 So is it horrible? Is everybody working really hard?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ah, well no, it's just uh, me and Wendy.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Wendy? -- That sounds like a girl's name.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 It is. Did I... not tell you about her?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Umhmm, umhmm, about the time you told me about New Year's Eve. Where is everybody else?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I sent them home.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Ohh, you are such a good boss! Is she pretty?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Uhh, uh...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	  Answer faster, answer faster!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I don't know!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	  Answer better, answer better!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I don't think of her that way, you know, she's a, she's a colleague.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 What does she do there?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Oh, she's regional Vice President; She's... just below me.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 She did WHAT?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 BE-LOW me!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Ahh, wait, is Wendy the runner-up Miss Oklahoma?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 *What*??
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, she... she didn't win...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Alright, well, maybe I should let you and the second prettiest girl in Oklahoma get back to work.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, second prettiest that year; I mean, of *all* the girls in Oklahoma, she's probably...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	  Oh Chandler, stop talking!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Honey, there's really nothing to worry about.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I'm serious!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Merry Christmas.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Merry Christmas.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Merry Christmas, you guys!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Others	  Yeah, Merry... Christmas. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	  Blah blargah, blar-blab.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  The wife says "Hi!".
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Ah. Fun conversation?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ah well, she's got this weird idea, that, uh, y'know, just because you and I are alone, that something is gonna happen.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Huh? Really? -- Hm, that'd be so terrible? 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 This is probably the wrong thing to be worrying about, but... you're getting ham on my only tie.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Whoa-ho, back off, Missy! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	  ...Missy?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I don't know; I'm not used to girls making passes at me! ...  Wait a minute... am I sexy in Oklahoma?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 You are to me... 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  No,... no...  NO!  Look, I'm, I'm married!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 So? I'm married. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I'm *happily* married.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Oh. - What's *that* like?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Right. So, I'm sorry...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Seriously? Happily married. So that phone call before, that was ... happy?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well look, it's not easy to spend this much time apart, you know. She's entitled to be a little paranoid... or, in this case: right on money! ... You know, she's amazing, and beautiful, and smart, and if she were here right now, ...she'd kick your ass. Look, you're a really nice person... ham stealing and adultery aside. But, what I have with my wife is pretty great, so nothing is ever gonna happen between us.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Wendy	 Okay, let me ask you something: if what you and your wife have is so great, then why are you spending Christmas with me?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I mean, you were the most beautiful woman in the room tonight!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Really?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 You kidding? You're the most beautiful woman in most rooms...   Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! What's going on? You and I just made out! You and I are making out?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Well, not anymore.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 But we don't do that.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 I know, I just thought it would be fun.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 How drunk are you?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Drunk enough that I know I wanna do this. Not so drunk that you should feel guilty about taking advantage.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  That's the perfect amount!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	  Y'know what's weird?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 What?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 This doesn't feel weird!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I know.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 You're a really good kisser.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, I have kissed over four women.  Do you wanna get under the covers?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Hm-hmm!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Okay!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Wow! You are really fast!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 It bodes well for me that speed impresses you.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 We're gonna see each other naked.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Yep!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Do you wanna do it at the same time?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Count of three?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 One!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Two!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Two!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Both	 Three! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well I think it's safe to say that our friendship is effectively ruined.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Eh, we weren't that close anyway!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Eh! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 So, are you really gonna go out with that nurse man?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Well uh, you and I are just goofing around, I thought, why not just goof around with him.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Y'know, I don't know if you've ever looked up the term goofing around in the dictionary... Well, I have, and the technical definition is, two friends who care a lot about each other and have amazing sex and just wanna spend more time together. But if you have this new fangled dictionary that gets you made at me, then we have to, y'know, get you my original dictionary. I am *so* bad at this.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 I think you're better than you think you are.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Really? Okay, so...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	  Know when to stop.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Y'know, I sensed that I should stop. So we're okay?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Yeah.  Don't do the dance.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Right!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 I can't get married until I get something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Okay, all right, all right, all right! Okay!  Okay, here's something, here's something blue and new.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 You're so efficient. I love you!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Let's go! 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 No-no-no, wait! We need something old!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Oh, okay, I have condom in my wallet that I've had since I was twelve.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 That'll work!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I don't think so.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay, now we just need something borrowed!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  Here just...take this. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 That's stealing!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 No, we'll-we'll bring it back! Just put it under your dress.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Ohh. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Okay, one thing at a time. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Listen umm, I've been thinking, it's not fair for me to ask you to spend all of your money on our wedding. I mean, you work, you work really hard for that.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Ehh.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Eh, you work for that.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Look, I thought about it too, and I'm sorry. I think we should spend all of the money on the wedding.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 You do?!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Yeah, I'm putting my foot down. Yeah look, when I proposed I told you that I would do anything to make you happy, and if having the perfect wedding makes you happy, then, then that's what we're gonna do.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Oh, you're so sweet.  Oh, but wait, what about our, what about the future and stuff?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Eh, forget about the future and stuff! So we only have two kids, y'know? We'll pick our favorite and that one will get to go to college.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 You thought about that?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Yeah.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 How many kids were we gonna have?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Uh, four, a boy, twin girls and another boy.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 What else did you think about?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Well, stuff like where we'd live, y'know? Like a small place outside the city, where our kids could learn to ride their bikes and stuff. Y'know, we could have a cat that had a bell on its collar and we could hear it every time it ran through the little kitty door. Of course, we'd have an apartment over the garage where Joey could grow old.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	  Y'know what? I-I don't want a big, fancy wedding.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Sure you do.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 No, I want everything that you just said. I want a marriage.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 You sure?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Uh-hmm.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I love you so much.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 I love you. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	  Oohh, I love it!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Really? You're not gonna return it?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Well, not this second!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	  Hey look, you guys, it's snowing!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Oh wow, it's so beautiful...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Wow, it really is!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 "Wendy" is a fat girl name.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Aren't we done with that?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Okay, fine. Let's talk about snow. -- Do you think it's snowing in Tulsa, where my husband is having sex on a copying machine?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Hey!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Oh my god...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Hey-heeyyy - Look at that, it's a Christmas miracle!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 What are you doing here?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I wanted to be with you. I missed you so much.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Hey, hey, uh, who did you miss the most?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Monica.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Got ya. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I never want to leave you again!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 But I thought if you left, you get fired.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Turns out they can't fire me. Because I quit.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 What?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 What, you, you really quit your job?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Yeah! It's a stupid job, and I could not stand leaving you. And why should I be the only one who doesn't get to do what he *really* wants to do?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 What do you really want to do?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  I have *not* thought this through!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 Oh my god!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I know, I, I should have talked to you first about it.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 No, I think that this is what you wanna do, I think it's great!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Thanks!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Chandler, your being here is the best Christmas present I could have ever imagined.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  Ahh...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	 Now give me my real gift.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Phoebe	  Thank you.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	  Here, pass these, will ya.. 
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	 Oh, hey...
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Ross	  "A donation has been made in your name to the New York City Ballet." -- How did you know?
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Rachel	 Wha... are you kidding? I can't return this.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I... thought it was a timely start to thinking about other people. Besides, this gift still says I love you guys.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Joey	 Mine's is to Lilian Myers.
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 I don't have a *job*!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Chandler	 Actuary... no. Book-keeper... no. Topless dancer...   Hey, d'you know what I just realized? You are the sole wage earner. *You* are the head of the household. I don't do anything - I'm a kept man!
09	10	0910	The One With Christmas In Tulsa	Monica	 You are!  Hey, here's twenty bucks. -- Why don't you go buy yourself something pretty while I'm at work tomorrow?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Hey!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Good morning, Tiger! I'm making you a nice big breakfast so you can keep up your strength for tonight. You're gonna get me good and pregnant.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I've got nowhere to go this morning. I'm unemployed! I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Well, I just lost my erection.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I mean, what am I supposed to do with myself? 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 You're supposed to find your passion in life. You can be whatever you wanna be now. It's exciting.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 But it's all so overwhelming. I don't know where to start. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Hey, wait a second. I can help you with this. You just need to be organized. We can make a list of your qualifications, and categorize jobs by industry. There could be folders and files! 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Hey! This is where your hyper-organized-pain-in-the-ass stuff pays off!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 I know!!! My erection is back!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	  Thank you!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Joey, can I have a sip of your coffee and a bite of your muffin?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Okay.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	: Pheebs, have you ever been bitten by a hungry Italian?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, it's just, I'm a little short on cash. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 If you want I could loan you some money?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Oh no, no, no. I learned never to borrow money from friends. No, that's why Richard Dreyfuss and I don't speak anymore.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Oh, hey, how about this? Wanna be an extra on my show?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 You could do that?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. The pay is pretty good and you could do it for as long as you need. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Oh my god, I'm gonna be on TV!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Okay, now. I gotta tell you, being on TV isn't as glamorous and exciting as you think.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Oh, really?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 No it is awesome!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Hi guys.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	All	 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Wow! Hey, why are you all dressed up?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Rachel and I are bringing Emma to Ralph Lauren today to introduce her to everyone. Doesn't she look cute?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 She sure does. Why does she have a pink bow taped to her head?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Well, because if one more person says "what a cute little boy" I'm gonna whip them with a car antenna!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 I think she's gonna be the hit of the office, huh? She's gonna be hotter than peasant blouses and A-line skirts.Can I get a blue bow?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	  Okay, I have looked through a bunch of career guides, photocopied and highlighted key passages and put them into alphabetical folders so you can make an informed decision.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 How long was I in there?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Okay. Let us start with the A's. Advertising.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Wait. Advertising! That's a great idea!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Don't you want to look through the rest?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I don't think I have to hear the rest. Advertising makes perfect sense. Sorry you had to waste all this time, though.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 You call eight hours alone with my label maker wasted time? Ooh, now I get to use my shredder!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I mean, I can write slogans. I mean, how hard can it be, right? "Cheese. It's milk that you chew." "Crackers. Because your cheese needs a buddy." "A grape. Because who can get a water melon in your mouth?"
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 I got one. "Socks. Because your family's feet deserve the best."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Honey? Leave it to the pros.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 I actually know someone in advertising. I grew up with this guy who is a vice president at a big agency. Maybe I can get him to meet you? Give me the phone.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 "The phone. Bringing you closer to people...who have phones."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 "Marriage. It's not for everybody."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 That went well. Almost everybody knew that she was a girl. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Yeah, after you punched that one guy who got it wrong, word spread. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 I'm just gonna go in my office and pick up some stuff .  Who the hell are you!?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Guy	 Who the hell are you?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 I'm the hell person whose office this is!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Good one, Rach.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Guy	 I'm Gavin Mitchell, the person who's taken over your job.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Excuse me?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Oh, your baby's so cute. Why did you put a pink bow on a boy?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Joey, look at me! I'm a nurse!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Yes you are. I think it may be time for my sponge bath. Sorry, I'm just so used to hitting on the extras. So, are you excited about your scene?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Yeah! But I'm a little shaky and nervous. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Oh, relax. Don't be. You'll be fine, you'll be fine. They'll probably just make you stand in the back.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Okay, okay, okay!  You. Here, come here, here. You're gonna take this tray, you're gonna stay on this yellow mark. You're gonna move on "action!" You're gonna walk over to the operating table. You're gonna stop on that blue mark, you're gonna putthe tray down. Don't walk too fast! But don't doddle.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Okay, now. What?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 And...Action!!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Cut! Cut!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm just a little nervous.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Well, don't be.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Okay, that helps.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 And...Action!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Cut!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Hey, you know what? Don't worry, Pheebs! It usually takes me three takes too!  Alright, eight.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 And...Action!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 So, do you have any other question about advertising?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 No, no. But let me show you what I can do. "Bagels and donuts. Round food for every mood."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 Monica warned me you might do that. I actually think we might have something for you at the agency. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Really? That's great!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 It's an unpaid internship.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 It's funny. When you said "unpaid" it sounded like you said "unpaid."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 Come on now. Monica has a good job. And it's not like you have a family to support.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Actually, we're trying, and I don't think Monica's gonna wanna postpone it. We're supposed to have sex tonight. Actually, she's probably at home naked right now. I tend to keep talking until somebody stops me. I can just picture her on the bed right now.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 Stop!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Interviewer	 Okay.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Wait a minute! What do you mean, you're taking over my job?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Well, while you were on your baby vacation I was doing your job.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 A vacation? My idea of a vacation does not involve something sucking on my nipples until they are raw.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Clearly you've never been to Sandles Paradise Island.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Alright! Don't get too comfortable there, because I'm back in two weeks! And I want everything back to the way it was. I can't say that I care too much for the way you've rearranged my office. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 I can't say I care too much for that smell you've brought in with you.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Excuse me?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Rach we have a code brown situation.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Can you please, please take care of it for me?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Alright, but you have to do one sometime.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Let me just get this straight! So I go have a baby and they send some guy in to do my job?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Well, there was talk of shutting down Ralph Lauren all together.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 That's right. You're very cheeky for a temp. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 I'm not a temp. I was transferred here from another department.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Oh yeah, what department was that? The Jerk department?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Oh, they didn't tell me about your quick wit.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Did they mention that I'm rubber and you're glue?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Mr. Zelner	  Gavin, Ralph loved your ideas.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Oh, hi Mr. Zelner.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Mr. Zelner	 Rachel, I see you've met Gavin. I must say, when you left us we weren't sure what we were gonna do. But then, Gavin to the rescue. Super Gavin!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 That's great. So now, Super Gavin, when I come back where are you planning on flying off to?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Well, that's up to Mr. Zelner. I'm sure he will make the right decision.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	  Oh, wow. Super ass-kissing power.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Mr. Zelner	 Incidentally, when are you coming back?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Today.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 You said two weeks.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 No, I said today! See, for a superhero, not so much with the listening.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Hey.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Hey. So, what did he say?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Well, he can be a little rough around the edges, so I'm gonna replace a word he used a lot, with the word "puppy." Okay, so he said: "If your puppy friend doesn't get her puppy act together, I'm gonna fire her mother-puppy ass."
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I can't do this. I'm not an actor.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 That's right, you're not. You're a nurse. You're Nurse With Tray. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Joey.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 No, no. Nurse With Tray doesn't know Joey, she doesn't have time for friends. She gets in that operating room and shecarries that tray to the doctor, because if she doesn't, people die!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Who dies?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	  Man With Eye Patch! You get in there and you do your job.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Yes, doctor.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Okay.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Okay, let's try this one more time. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Hang in there, Man With Eye Patch, your tray is coming!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 And...Action!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	  Yes, I did it!!! I nailed it!!! Yay! What's next?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 The rest of the scene.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Okay, from the top, people!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Listen. Sudden change of plans. My maternity leave just ended. They told me that if I didn't come back today, they were gonna fire me.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 What? No, that's illegal. I'm gonna have the labor department down her so fast they won't even...
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Alright, alright. Calm down Norma Rae. They didn't actually say that. I'm just afraid if I don't come back right nowthis guy's gonna try to squeeze me out. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 What about Emma? We don't have a nanny.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 I know. You know, we're just gonna have to figure out a plan tonight. Can you please just take care of her for today?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Absolutely. Just give me your breast and we'll be on our way.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Come on, I don't know what else to do.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Fine, fine.  We'll have fun, won't we? Yes, we will, yes we will. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Ross?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Huh?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 You're pretty.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Whatever I decide to do, I'm gonna be starting a career from scratch. It's gonna be a while before I make a living at it. Maybe now is not the right time to be starting a family.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 So you have to tell Monica you don't want to have a baby right now?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Yeah. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	  Good-bye.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	  Okay, it's baby time. Pants off Bing.  Didn't see you there Geller. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Yeah, Ross is here so...
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Yeah, and I was really hoping that I could hang out. What do you feel like doing?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 We're gonna have sex.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 I don't feel like having sex. Maybe we can watch a movie or something.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Let me put it this way. We're having sex whether you're here or not.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Pants off Bing!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Alright. Now that I'm back, why don't you just fill me in on what you've been up to?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Well, I've changed your screensaver from that picture of *Nsync.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Hey, they were popular when I left!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Also, I've just been working on this big presentation for tomorrow.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Well, I should be involved in that, so why don't you get me up to speed?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 That's gonna take weeks. Why don't just let me take care of the presentation?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Oh, no no no no. I see what you're doing here, alright, listen, this is my job buddy. Okay, I've had it for five years, and I know how it works, so why don't you just catch me up!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Fine. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	  Oh god. You've totally messed with the back support of my chair. How do you fix this?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Hey, you've been here five years, you figure it out.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Fine, I will.  Alright, fill me in! 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Hey.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Hey.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 You have a blue tie that would go with this? Emma spit up on mine.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Oh, yeah. But you have to give it back if I get a job. Of course, by that time in the future ties will be obsolete and we'll all be wearing silver jump suits.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	  Hi, good morning lover. I gotta say after last night, I'm a little weak in the knees.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 Here's an idea. You walk into a room...take a quick scan!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	  Sorry.  But I kind of have this feeling that we may have made a baby last night.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Oh god, I have to tell you something. You're not pregnant. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 What are you talking about?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 That thing that I have to do to make a baby. I faked it.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 What!? You faked it?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Ross	 You know what? I don't need a tie. I mean, it's better, open collar. You know, it's more casual 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Joey, listen. I can't do this, it doesn't make any sense. Yesterday I was a nurse, and today I'm a waitress at a cafe?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Oh, sometimes we use the same extras for different parts. It's okay. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Well, it's not okay, because I gave a very memorable performance as the nurse. And now suddenly I'm the waitress?That's gonna confuse my fans. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Maybe you are a nurse, but you moonlight as a waitress.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Uhuh. Because I'm a single mother, supporting my two children.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Nice.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Wait a minute. Dr. Drake Ramoray and I work at the same hospital. Wouldn't I come over to say hi to him?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 No, no. See, you and Drake are having a fight. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 About what?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 He slept with you and then never called you.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 And I just wanted a new daddy for Davy and Becky.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Okay, okay, from the top. And...Action!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Man	 So, I'm surprised you agreed to have lunch with me.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey, Drake	 I'm surprised to, but yet here I am.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Cut, cut! What are you doing!?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Yeah, well, I'm very angry at him, because he slept with me and never called me back.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Extra	 Me too!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Another Extra	 Me too!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Oh, calm down! She means on the show! We need some new extras around here!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	  Wow, you're here already.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Yes. Emma and I came in a little early to do research on the presentation. I actually made a few changes, butI think I'm caught up on everything. So ask me anything!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 How do you fix the chair?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Except that!  Oh, hello, Mr. Zelner. We're all ready for our presentation this afternoon.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Mr. Zelner	 Good, because it's in ten minutes.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 What? I can't do that! I have the baby, and Ross is not gonna pick her up for another hour.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Mr. Zelner	 Well, then Gavin can give the presentation, okay, we have to do it now. Ralph needs to leave early today. He's goinghelicopter shopping.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Well, there you go. You win, you win. You get to do the presentation, you'll knock 'em dead, no one will ever remember that I worked here, and then Ralph will buy his helicopter, and Super Gavin will just fly right along side of him!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 You can do the presentation.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 No, I can't, I have a baby.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 I'll watch her.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Why would you do that?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 Because you've worked really hard, and it's your job, and you're a little crazy.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 That's really nice.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 I should tell you that crying women make me very uncomfortable.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Rachel	 Then you're not gonna like what's coming.  I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Thank you, thank you.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Gavin	 I'm really fine, don't worry, I'm great with children.  Gavin Mitchell. Pleased to meet you. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Please don't fire my friend. Just let me talk to her.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Director	 Okay, okay. But this is her last chance. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Thank you, thank you. How about I do something for you? Tomorrow, I'll bring you a hat, cover up the bald?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 Hey, listen Pheebs. I was just talking to the director, and he was thinking, maybe this time you don't hit Drake, you just wait on the tables?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 I can't do that. I'm an actor. I have a process.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 You're a masseuse. You have a table with a hole in it.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Wait a minute, I see what's happening here. You're threatened. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	 What?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe	 Yeah, I'm so good in this scene that I'm stealing focusfrom you. Well, rise to the challenge Tribianni 'cause I just raised the bar. Come join me up here!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey	  Yeah, you can fire her, but I would call security, she won't go easy.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 You faked it? You couldn't have faked it!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Oh yes you can. You just make the faces and the noises. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Guys can fake it? Unbelievable. The one thing that's ours! Besides, why would you fake it when we're trying to have a baby?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 That's actually why. Look, I'm starting a whole new career now, and I'm not saying that I don't want to have a baby,I'm just saying maybe we could wait a little while.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Like a month?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Or a year?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Really, you want to wait a year?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 It could be less than a year. I mean, you've heard my stuff. "Pants. Like shorts, but longer." It'll probably be more than a year. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 I really wanna have a baby.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Yeah, me too. Look, I'll just get my old job back. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 No, I want you to have a job that you love. Not statistical analysis and data reconfiguration.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I quit and you learn what I do?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 It's just, I think, there's never gonna be a right time to have a baby. I mean, now you're unemployed and in a little while you'll find a new job that'll keep you really busy. There's always gonna be a reason not to do this, but I think once the baby comes, forget about all those reasons. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 I guess. It's always gonna be scary when we have a baby. 
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 It's gonna be really scary. I mean, god. When we have a baby, there's gonna be so much that we're not able to control. I mean, the apartment's gonna be a mess, I won't have time to clean it. What if the baby gets into the ribbon drawer? Messes up all the ribbons?! What if there's no room for a ribbon drawer, because the baby's stuff takes up all the space!? Where will all the ribbons go!?!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Should we go make a baby right now before you change your mind?
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 Yes, please!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Chandler	 Oh, and I promise, I will not fake it this time.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Monica	 I wish I could say the same. I'm a little shook up!
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Joey, Drake	 I know you botched that operation on purpose. I can't prove it yet, but when I do, you'll be going to jail for murder. I don't care if you are my brother.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Man	 I'm not your brother.
09	11	0911	The One Where Rachel Goes Back To Work	Phoebe, Waitress	 What about my children Drake?! Huh!?  No!! No!! No! God!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Hey
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Hey. So where's Mon?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Oh, she's at home, putting up decorations for Rachel's birthday party tonight.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 And you're not helping?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 I tried, but apparantly singing "I will survive" in a helium voice   - not helping.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Hey you guys!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey, Chandler	  Hey! Happy birthday ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Shhh don't say that loud, Gunther's gonna want to hug me.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Uh, good news everyone, we finally found a nanny. This is Molly . Molly, Chandler, Joey.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey, Chandler	 Hi.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 Hi.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Ooh, somebody's getting a little fussy.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 You damn right I am, I've been waiting for a cookie for 7 minutes.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Ok, you know what, I'm just gonna take her outside.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 No, you stay, I'll do it . 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 OK, thank you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 Nice to meet you guys .
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Yeah, you too.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, wow, Molly is just great!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Yeah.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Yes, Bravo on the hot nanny.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 What? You really think she's hot?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Are you kidding? If I wasn't married she'd be rejecting me right now.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 And Joey?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 How do you think she's doing?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Am I the only one who doesn't think that she's hot? Ross?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Eh, I mean, I mena she's not unattractive but hot? I ....
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Thank you! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Now that Rachel's gone?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 So hot I cried myself to sleep last night. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Hey Mike, what's the capital of Peru?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Lima.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 No. It starts with a "v" and ends with an "x". Helpfully   with a "to" in the middle.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 You know, kinda think of it, the capital of Peru IS "vtox".    Oh god! Oh!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 What?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 OK, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but I think I just saw a   rat in your cupboard.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	  Oh, whew, no, that's Bob.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 What, is he your pet rat?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Well not so much a pet as, you know, an occasional visitor who   I put food out for, you know. Kinda like Santa. Except Santa doesn't poop on   the plate of cookies.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 You can't keep a rat in your appartment! They're extremely unsanitary,   and they transmit leptospirosis and hantavirus.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 What are those?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 I don't know but they don't sound like spa treatments. You have to get   rid of it!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 OK, fine, if it means that much to you I'll get rid of Bob.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Thank you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 So weird, you think he's so gross and you're willing to eat his crackers.   
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Hello.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Hello
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Gavin, I just wanted to say thank you again for watching Emma   yesterday during the presentation. I really owe you an appology.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 For what?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Well, when we first met, you know, I thought you were pompous   and arrogant and obnoxious ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Is this your first appology?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 No, I just mean that, you know, first impressions don't mean anything. And   I-I think you're a really good guy and I'm sorry that I misjudged you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Heather	 Good morning! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Hello.  But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf,   I am just really really happy ...  I'm sorry,   obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait   'till it's finished.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 What?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 I was giving you an appology and you were totally checking her out!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 I wasn't checking her out. I'm in fashion, I was looking at her   skirt. Or was it pants? I didn't really see what happened below the ass area.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh wow, you are really, you're really a creep.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Why do you even care if I was looking at her? Are you jealous?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh yeah, I'm jealous. "Oh Gavin, please, please look at   my ass".  Stop looking at my ass! I mean, I just   think you are totally inappropriate, ok? This is a work environment, she's your   subordinate.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 I thought it was ok when you slept with your old assistant Tag.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 That is totally different for two reasons. One - I didn't know   that you knew that. And two, I wasn't some creep staring at his ass, we had   a deap meaningful relationship.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Huh. What's Tag's last name?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 It was ...  oh my god. He didn't have a last   name. It was just "Tag". You know, like Cher, or, you know, Moses.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 But it was a deap meaningful relationship.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, you know what - my first impression of you was absolutely   right. You are arrogant, you are pompous ... Morgan! Morgan! Tag's last name   was Morgan! Huh!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 It was Jones.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Yeah well what are you, his boyfriend?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Man, I wish I had a nanny like you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 You mean, when you were a baby.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Sure.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Would you stop staring at her?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 I wasn't staring. I was leering.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 What's the big deal with her? Maybe she's attractive in an obvious kind   of way.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Yeah, obvious beauty's the worst. You know, when it's right there   in your face. Me, I like to have to work to find someone attractive. Makes me   feel like I earned it.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Looks like Joey is doing allright with her.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Yeah. Hey, that was nice of you guys to back off and let Joey get the girl   for once.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	  I'm gonna take her back to the appartment.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Ok, I'll be home right after work. Ok, by Emma-Wemma-Demma, I love you   - wovyou dovyou ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 Bye
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 They've elected me to talk to you about the baby talk - it's not so good.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 I think it's sweet. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross, Joey, Chandler	 Bye, Emma-Wemma-Demma.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	  Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if   you didn't go after her.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Why not?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Because it took us months to find a good nanny and I wouldn't want anything   to, you know, drive her away.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 So, what, you think I'm just gonna sleep with her and never call   her again and things are gonna get uncomfortable?  Yeah, sounds   about right.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Come on, there are plenty of other women out thereok? Just - just   forget about her, ok? Just, she's off limits.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Oh, man, why did have to go and say that for? Now that you told   me I can't have it makes me want her even more!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 What are you, a child?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Yes!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Joey, come on now, for me! Please, just-just try to focus your sexual energy   on someone else.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Fine. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	  Take me home! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Hey Mikey
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Hey P
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 What are you doing?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Setting rat traps.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 To kill Bob??
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 No, no, to test his neck strength.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 No, Mike, I don't want to kill him! I thought we were just gonna   capture him and, and you know, set him free in the country side where he can   maybe meet a friendly possom and a wisecracking owl.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Ok, ok, I'll throw away the traps.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 I'll find Bob, I'll get him. Bob?  Bob! Robert!  Oh wait, I think I hear him. Oh - Oh my god! Bob had babies!   Bob's a mom!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Better think of a new name for him.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 I don't know, I kinda like Bob for a girl.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 I don't know, I mean I'm not sure  ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Oh my god, we killed Bob!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Maybe it wasn't Bob, maybe it was a mouse.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Suzie? 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Whazzup??
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Seriously dude, 3 years ago.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Listen, can you do me a favor? I'm gonna be out today. Can you just keep   an eye on Joey, make sure nothing happens between him and Molly?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 You don't trust him?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Wh - No. Some woman who sounded a lot like Joey called earlier and asked   for her daughter, the "hot nanny".
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Is this really your long term plan, for me to run interference?   Because I could get a job any day now.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 You do appear right on the cusp of something. Come on man, I'm   sure he'll lose interest in a week or two, but for now can you please just do   this for me?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Allright, fine, but don't blame me if it doesn't work. Because you know   as well as I do that once Joey sets his mind on something, more often than not,   he's going to have sex with it.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Well we gotta do something, ok? Nannies like her don't grow on trees.  
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Picturing that tree?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 I am, yes.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Where you going, Joe?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 For a walk.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Oh. You mind if I join you?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Actually, that will be long. You know, I really need to organize   my thoughts.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Your thoughts? Plural?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Allright, fine, I only have one thought! It's about the hot nanny, I gotta   see her!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Joe.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Now YOU'RE telling me I can't see her?? You guys are killing me!   She's forbidden fruit! It's like ... like she's the princess and I'm the stable   boy ... Why are you doing this, huh? Did Ross tell you not to let me go over   there?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Yes, as a matter of fact he did, so I can't let you go.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Huh. Interesting. Now there are obstacles. Hot nanny and me against the   world. This is the kind of stuff great novels are made of.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Great novels? 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Fine ... mediocre porn
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Gavin Mitchelle's office.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Rachel Green's office!! Give me that phone!    Hello, this is Rachel Green, how can I help you? Uh huh ... ok then ... I'll   pass you back to your son 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Hey Mom! No, that's just my secretary. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Mom, I'll call you later. Yeah.   Yes?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 If you like looking at butts so much why don't you just go look at a mirror?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Thank god you finally said that, I saw you make a note on your   pad three hours ago.  Man, I really bug you,   don't I?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, please, I don't care about you enough to bug me. In fact,   from now on, I'm going take the high road. And I'm going be very very nice to   you, you "momma's boy", starting right now.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Hey Rach!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Hi!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Ready for your birthday lunch?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Yeah I am, I am! Oh, but first of all, Monica, I would like to introduce   you to my very talented colleage and more importantly my wonderful friend Gavin   Mitchelle. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Pleased to meet you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Pleased to meet you. So you're coming to Rachel's party tonight?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh no no no no no, Gavin can't, he already has plans, most likely with his   mother. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Well I don't mind, I'll cancel. I would never miss my secretary's birthday.   
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Why did you invite him?? I can't stand that guy!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 You were just being so nice to him!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 I was faking it! Can't you tell when I'm being fake?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Hey, Mr Philips, nice suit!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Right there! That was so fake!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Shh!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	  I still can't believe you invited Gavin. Allright, he is the   last person I want to see.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Oh, you're welcome for the party. I'm glad you're having a good time.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 God, I hope he doesn't show up. Of course he's not gonna show up, the guy   hates me.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Does he?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 What?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Maybe he's bothering you so much because he likes you. It's like in first   grade when Skippy Langwild always pushed me on the playground because he secretly   had a crush on me?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, Monica, you think Skippy liked you? Honey, all those buys had a bet   to see if he can knock you over.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	  She's out, I'm gonna take her home.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, ok, thank you.   Do you see what all the guys   see in her?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Wouldn't kick her out of bed. No more Vodka for me! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Hey Rach, so can I sing happy birthday to you now?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Yeah, sure!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Oh ...  Happy birth ...  oh, see you   later 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Hey Rach, somebody got you shoes!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, give me! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Be careful, be careful! These are my rat babies!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Yeah. We have rat babies now.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Ahhhh , you brought rats to my birthday party?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 So this is what a stroke feels like.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 I had to bring them! We killed their mother, they're our responsibility   now. You know, they require constant care. You should know that, Rachel, you're   a mother.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Are you comparing my daughter to a rat?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 No! Seven rats! I think we should take them home, we need feed   them.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 whhh wait, you're gonna leave my party to take care of a box of rats?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Well I'm sorry Rachel, but I'm not like you, ok? Not everyone   can afford help. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Where the hell are Joey and Molly? I asked you to watch them.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	  I'm sorry, I got a little occupied.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 We have to stop them before something happens!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	  Right behind you, big guy!  
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 So you see, Molly, what people don't understand is that acting is a discipline.   It takes a lot of hard work.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 So where did you study?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Oh, I didn't go to college.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 No, where did you study acting?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Molly ... people don't study acting ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Molly, ah, do you mind giving us just a minute?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	 Sure, I'll go check on Emma.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Thanx.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	  Will the stable boy never get the princess??
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 What do you think you're gonna do, have sex with her right here on my couch?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 No ... the leather sticks to my ass. You know, this isn't fair.   What makes you think that I'm just gonna sleep with her and then blow her off?   Huh? Can't you guys open your minds to the possibility that I actally like her,   and might want something real?  Look, the truth is, I haven't felt this   way about anyone since Rachel, ok? I didn't think I could ever love again.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross, Chandler	 Come on! Joe!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 Ok 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Woman	 Hi, is Molly here?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Yeah, come on in. Molly?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Molly	  Hey! Guys, this is Tabatha .  I'll see you tomorrow.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Ross	 Ok ...  Well, uh, Joey, I guess we have   no problem.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Joey	 It's like my favorite fairy tale come true!  The   princess, the stable boy and the lesbian!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Ok, ok, you start preparing the formula and I start changing   the box and then we gotta put them straight to bed.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Hey, when did we become one of those couples whose lives revolve   around their rats?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Well, you know what, they're our responsibility now.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Ok, fine, these rats are our responsibility. What happens when they mate   and there are hundreds of them?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Mate? They're all brothers and sisters.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Yeah - not such a problem with rats. No, they're more of a "love   the one you're with" kind of animals.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 No.  wh - get off your sister! Oh my god, what   are we gonna do? We have 7 rats. So what if each of them has 7 rats? And then   each of those have 7 rats? That's like ...    That's math I can't even do! What are we gonna do?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 Well, I know this is gonna sound crazy, but, we could not let   the box of rats ruin our lives.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Yeah, ok. I guess you're right. Allright, so we should just give them away.   But to nice families, with children, and reduced fat wheat thins. They're Bob's   favorites. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 It's gonna be ok.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 You must think I'm crazy.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Mike	 No, I think you're sweet.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Good. It's just so hard, it's hard for me to ... let them go.   I guess it just brings back memories, you know, from ... when I gave birth to   my brother's triplets and I had to give them up.  I haven't   told you about that yet, have I?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Hey!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Hi. Thanks for the party, honey. Should I help you clean up?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 No way! You had your party, now I have mine! Is everything alright?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Yeah, I just get a little bummed when my birthday's over.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Well, at least you have one thing to be happy about. That jerk Gavin from   your office didn't show up .
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Mmm hmm.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Yeah, hey. 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Oh, we weren't talking about you. No, no way to recover.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 No.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Nice party.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Well, it was, and you would have seen it if you didn't showed up at  ... 9:30?? God! Oh, this party was lame ...
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	  Again, you're welcome.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Look, I'll just give you this and go.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Oh, you bought me a present! Why?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Well, let me explain how birthday parties usually work. There   are presents, and a cake, perhaps a fourth or fifth person. Ok, I ... got you   the present to make up for being such a jerk to you earlier.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Aww. Well, ok, well that's very nice. And you wrote a card . "From Gavin"
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 I really mean it.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	  Awww, awww, it's beautiful.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 You don't mind?  Well, what do you know, it fits!
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 See, Gavin, you're capable of being a nice guy. Why did you give me such   a hard time?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 I'm not sure.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 Well Monica seems to think it's because you have feelings for me.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 I do have feelings for you.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 You do?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Gavin	 Yes, I feel that you are a little annoying.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Rachel	 See? Why, Gavin, why? Right when I'm about to change my opinion   of you, you go and you ...  and you do that ... 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	  First I was afraid, I was petrified 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	  Hey
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	  Hi
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	 Listen, I think I've left something here.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Oh, well someone left this . This is yours?
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	  No, but I like it. I think I left one of   my rat babies.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Chandler	 Oh, uh, well, I haven't seem it but if I do I'll let you know.
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Monica	 Ohmygod! Rat baby! Rat baby! Rat baby! 
09	12	0912	The One With Phoebe's Rats	Phoebe	  Ooh, maybe that's him!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Hey!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Yeah! Yeah! OK! Sure! Look! Can we...can we talk about what happened here last night?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Sure! Just give me a second to get all huffy and weird like you! Do you believe that who everdid something over here last night did what they did or didn't do ...I mean come on!!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 OK you...you really don't know what I am talking about?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 No!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 OK! Last night after the party I saw Rachel kissing that jerk from her office out on your balcony.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Our balcony? Seriously? That's so funny because I told Monica we should put lights on our balcony. And she said"No, no. It's too cold, nobody will go out there." And I said "Maybe if we put some light out there they will"
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Right that's why I came over to talk about. Hum...I saw Rachel kissing some guy on your balcony,even though there were NO LIGHTS !
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 So are you gonna...talk to her?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Why...Why should I? I mean if she wants to move on, that's fine!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 You know when "That's fine" sounds true when someone yells it and spits!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 No I'm serious. I mean she wants to date people? Fine! I don't care but...at least she could have told me. You knowI...I've been putting my life on hold and just concentrating on Emma but if she wants to go out there kissing guys shebarely knows, then so will I ! Very funny! Ross is gay! Ah! Ah!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 No no no. Good. So you're moving on? Do you have any idea where you're moving?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I don't know. I mean I have plenty of opportunity. Just just now there were some women at the coffee house smiled at me.And then the other day on the subway a woman "accidentally" sat on my hand.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Dude, don't rub my face in your crazy single life!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Well, and how about this? There is an anthropologist at school who totally came on to me during the inter-departmentalPotluck dinner.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Why did I get married?!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Hey! Let me ask you guys something. I have a new headshot taken tomorrow right and the photographer said she thinks Ishould have my eyebrows waxed. Is that weird for a guy?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Well it depends.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 On...?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 On how far along he's in the sex change process!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 No I totally disagree. No I think it's fine for a guy to do something like that. Such you an actor. Not that you need to,your eyebrows are...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Ok! Stop it you guys! Stop staring! You're freaking me out!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Your knuckles are kinda hairy too...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Oh man! I have to get those done too?!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Wow! Talking about high maintenance
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Hey hey! You dye your hair!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 I'm a woman!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Arghhh! Double standards!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Oh before I forget, are you coming to Mike's piano bar tonight?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Only if I don't have to get up and sing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 But everybody sings. It's so much fun! Last time this adorable old man got out there, forgot all of the words, flipped outand everyone booed him off the stage. So funny.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 It's just, I'm not good at singing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Oh! What's the matter? Are you scared? You're afraid I'm a better singer? You're afraid I'm gonna beat you at singing?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 No no, it's not working on me. Wow! I must be growing up!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 OK fine! Please come and support Mike. You don't have to sing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 So I don't have to sing and I can just sit there and pass judgments on others?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 While drinking...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 I'm there!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Hi guys! Listen I really need your help. I think I did something really stupid.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Well yes Rachel but you got something so beautiful out there
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 No not that. I kissed Gavin last night.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Oh my god.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 You kissed him?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Yeah. It was after the party, we were on the balcony and...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Wait wait wait. I was at home the whole time. How did I missed that?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 It was the end of the party, you were probably ironing wrapping paper.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Oh yeah...So how did you end up kissing?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 You know we were all alone and he was being really nice to me and, oh and he gave me this scarf...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 I thought you hated him?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 You know honey, there is a thin line between love and hate, and it turns out that line...is a scarf!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 So are you thinking of starting up something with this guy?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 I don't know. It's so complicated. I work with this guy, you know, I have the baby, and I have Ross, and I just...I don'tknow what to do and I have to be at the office and see Gavin in ten minutes.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Sounds like you need to think about what you want, talk to Gavin, and you definitely should talk to Ross
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Or...I could call in sick and not deal with it at all...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Wow! Five-month maternity leave, you're back for four days, kiss a co-worker, call in sick, they are lucky to have you!!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Salon Girl	 Hi
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Hey. I'm here for my eyebrow appointment.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Salon Girl	 Name?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Chandler Bing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Salon Girl	 Ok. Very good. Have a seat right over here Mr. Bing and Sonia will be right with you.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 OK Thanks.. I touched the stuff
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Sonia	 I'll take care of it
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Thanks. Do you get a lot of guys in here?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Sonia	 Oh absolutely.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Oh good...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Sonia	 Are you looking to meet somebody?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 All right let's just do this.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Sonia	 We'll get to the wax in a minute. First I want to tweeze some of the strays, ok? This may sting just a little bit...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Please I have an extremely high threshold...Holly Mother Of God! My face! My face!! I'm all right! I'm all right!Just a little bit of shock that's all but I'll be fine you can go again. I'm OK Dammit! Woman!! How Hoooow!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Hey it's the most eligible man in NY. How's the moving on going?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Not well. I went on the subway again and someone did sit on my hand but that person was neither female nor wearing pants.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Well maybe you're going about this the wrong way. You know I mean think about it. Single white male, divorced three times,two illegitimate children. The personal ad writes itself....
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 That's funny...Do you think you'll ever work again?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 What are doing? You know I can only dish it out!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I can't believe Rachel just moved on and didn't say anything to me
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Maybe she didn't move on, you know...maybe that kiss was just an impulsive one-time birthday thing
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 No no, about a month ago she gave her number to some guy in a bar.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Did she go out with him?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 No. When he called, I...I threw the message away.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Ah! The high road...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 You know what? Enough! Enough talking! I have to get moving! Hey check out those two blondes over there!Hey come with me!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Are you trying to get everybody divorced?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 You don't have to do anything. It will just be easier if it is the two of us, like college, remember? You...you break theice with some kind of jokes so that they know you're the funny one and I swoop in with some interesting conversation, sothey'll see that I'm the brilliant, brooding, sexy one...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 I thought I had to make the jokes!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Don't you have to be at work?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Oh come on! Hello! Hi! My name is Chandler, here's my friend Ross right here, and we were wondering you know if you're up for it. We only need six more people for a human pyramid...Swoop!! Swoop!!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Hum...So...hum...Oh hey I noticed you were reading the paper...another flood in Europe? Heres a question: "Would you...would you rather drown or be burnt alive?"
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Blonde Girl	 Sorry...we were just leaving
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 We still got it!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Who is it?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Gavin! I brought you some soup.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Why?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 I heard you were sick...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh! Right! Yeah! Hold on, I'll be just clean up in here a little bit! Hello Gavin
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 I missed you at work today. How are you feeling?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 I a not gonna lie to you, I'm pretty sick
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Oh! Good! Because I was having a totally paranoid moment when I thought you called in sick to avoid me.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh no no no
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 So I had fun last night
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 So did I
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Exactly how contagious is this thing you have? I mean is it a cold for standing on the balcony or did a monkey bite you?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 It's just a cold
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Do you have fever? Let me see. Hum...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 What? What's the matter?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 What's Ross doing to you on that picture?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh he's dusting me with a fossil brush. He thought it would be funny.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Right. Right. Ross. So what's the deal with you guys? I don't want to get in the middle of anything
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh you're not. You're not gonna get in the middle of anything, don't worry about Ross really, really. Oh! Hide! That's Ross! Hide! Hide!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Yeah! But you said not to worry about...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 I lied! And I'm not sick! Just stay behind the curtain!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Molly	 Hi!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh! Molly! You're not Ross.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Molly	 No I'm here to take Emma to your mother's, remember?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Right, right, yes!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Molly	 Don't panic!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 What?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Molly	 There is a man behind your curtain. I have a mace in my purse.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 No! That's OK! That's OK! That's OK! No no no no! This is my business associate Gavin. He's just being silly.Gavin come out from behind that curtain!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Hi! Gavin! Please to meet you. It was my idea to stand there.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Molly	 Hello! I just go and get Emma.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 OK.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 So hum...Why did I have to hide?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 I thought it was Ross.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 So what if it was? I thought there was nothing going on between you two...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 There isn't. There is totally isn't.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 You hear a key in the hole and you jump like a young bronco coming out of a chute for the first time. I used to be arodeo clown.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 All right. Look. Gavin...I...I guess I felt guilty that you were here, which I shouldn't. You know Ross and I are not inany relationship but...he is the father of my child, and you know we do live together and plus there is just so muchhistory...you know it's just...I don't know, I'm sorry, I'm just all over the place.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 It's OK. I know it's probably not my place but can I give you a piece of advice?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Yes
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 I think you should talk to Ross about all this.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 People keep saying that. Oh I'm sorry Gavin
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 Don't be. It's just bad timing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 So seriously...rodeo clown?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Gavin	 One of the best, ma'am, one of the best...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 "No time for losers, 'cause we are the champions of the world...!" Thank you!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 Oh she's my girlfriend. That's not just how we do it here. I got to get a break and when we come back we've got Kennethsinging "I touch myself"...I'm not here to judge!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Hi hi...Oh you have got to sing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 No I told you I can't.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 But you would have so much fun and you have a really nice voice.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 What have you heard me sing?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 All the time when you're cooking.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 What?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Yeah you're always singing "Yummy yummy yummy, I've got love in my tummy"
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Yeah I do rock that one.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 OK so isn't there a little part of you that wants to get up there?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Just a little but...it's just so scary! I don't even know what I would sing...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 Well I've got a book around...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 "Delta Dawn"
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Hi! I could help not notice, but that's an unusual necklace
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Woman	 You already hit on me an hour ago
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Right, so that's a firm "no". I cannot believe this, I just keep striking out.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 I don't get it neither, I mean you're obviously desperate, you're asking women how they want to be killed
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 This is great. Rachel's gonna keep kissing guys until she finds the one she wants and I'm gonna die alone.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 By drowning or...?!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Why would he break up with me?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Her Friend	 I don't know sweetie.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 All I ever wanted was just love him and have him love me back. I mean, am I so unlovable?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Well...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I know! 
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 All right, that was Kenneth with his much too literal rendition of "I touch myself". Coming up next we've got Monicasinging "Delta Dawn".
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Wait wait! I can't sing in front of all these people.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Just pretend they're not even here! It's OK Monica, when that spotlight hits you it so bright you won't see anyoneanyway.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Hi! I'm Monica and I'm gonna be singing "Delta Dawn""Delta Dawn, what's that flower you have on? Could it be a faded rose from days gone by? ..."
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Can you totally see through her shirt ?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 Like an X-Ray. Bad day not to wear a bra.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 "To take you to his mansion in the sky-y?"
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Hey, I need your help.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Wow, it seems serious. What seems to be the problem, Ashley Judd?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Look, I'll get new headshot taken, all right, so I want to get my eyebrows shaped
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 I am sorry, moment to make fun of that, please!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 You may be a sissy but I'll still . All right, it hurts so bad, I could only let her do oneeyebrow and now... they dont match!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Its like a baby caterpillar chasing its mama!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 All right, look, you got to help me out, ok? Look, I have the magic marker, I want you to fill in the skinny one soI dont look stupid for my pictures.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Ok. First of all, this is green!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 What the hell am I supposed to do!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 All right, I will help you out but you have to promise me you will not tell anyone what I am about to tell you.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 What, what.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Ok, you know how most kids get their allowance from mowing the lawn or taking out the garbage, well I earned mineby plucking the eyebrows of my father and his business partners.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Oh my God!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I guess you dont need my help Victor Victoria!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Ok all right, no, no, no, no, I do, I do, I do, I need your help, but Chandler I dont know if I can take anymoreplucking. It hurts so bad!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Oh, not with my combination of ice cubes, aloe Vera and my gentle self-loathing touch.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 "Take me to the mansion in the sky-y". I am sorry, the song is over. Did you see me out there?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Every little bit of you!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 I cant believe I did this. I cant believe I'm singing for the people, and they liked me! Hey, did you hear thatone shouting look at those tips! I mean, did I really help you get a lot of tips?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 Sure.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Mon', not that you didnt sound good, but...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Good? Didnt you hear them...I was great! Thank you so much for making me do this. Thats is the best gift ever.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Mike	 Also a good gift? Underwear.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Thank you so much for letting me do this. Public bathrooms freak me out, I can't even pee, let alone doanything else.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 But, whats great is that you dont mind talking about it.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Its so amazing I met you the same day that Eric broke up with me, because its like you lose a boyfriend,you get a boyfriend.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Uh-ah!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 No dont worry, this is not some rebound thing. I am totally over Eric.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 . Good choice Ross.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh, hey! Hi, there you are, Ive been looking for you everywhere!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, yeah, hello, well, now, here I am.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Listen, my mum is not bringing the baby back until nine o clock. So I was hoping you and I could have achance to kind of talk somebody here?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, yeah, yeah thats Michelle.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Who?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, just this woman Ive been seeing.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Youve being seeing someone?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Yeah, didnt I mention that? Yeah, I mean, we havent being going out for too long, but rather there is thisamazing connection between us. I-I mean, in fact just before you came in she called me her boyfriend. I thought it wasa little too soon, but it was also, you know, it was kinda nice.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 What are you taking amoxicillin for?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 How great is this? You are already comfortable enough to look through my stuff. Oh, I am sorry Michelle, thatsmy roommate, Rachel.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Hi, and I am also Emmas mother.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Ah, who is Emma?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I told you about my daughter.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 This is your daughter? I can be your new mummy!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 And done!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Oh my God! I didnt feel a thing ! Hey, are you still looking for a job because you can tweeze circles aroundthat sadistic bitch at the saloon
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Thanks. You wanna see what it looks like?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. Hey, they totally match! They look great! They look great! How you doing!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah, I think it looks pretty good. I was a little worried I was uncovering a birthmark right aboutthere, but it turned out to be a little piece of chocolate.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Thank you so much.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 No problem.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Listen thats a pretty girly hour we just spent, we should add some manly make up for it.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Yeah.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Comb my eyelashes.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Ok, for my next song I think Ill sing something a little more upbeat. All right? Oh, how about the PointerSisters I am so excited. And make it bouncy!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Oh youll probably take care of that on your hands.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 I am sorry I am late. Youll understand when youll see Joey.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Honey, youre just in time, Im about to sing another song!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Really? In front of all this people?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 And they love me!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Oh my God!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Yes, she gives the people what they want.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 All right, watch!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 "Tonight's the night we're gonna make it happen, tonight we'll put all other things aside. Give in thistime and show me some affection..."
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Are those my wifes nipples?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Phoebe	 Oh? Isnt that funny? I didn't see that before, I wouldn't have let her go up again.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 I gotta stop this.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Monica	 Oh, who cares, they still love me! "I am so excited..."
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 You, touching yourself, out!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Wow. She does that a lot!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Ross, you didnt tell me you were a doctor!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 What, what, wait a minute! You havent even told her you were a doctor, yet? How long have you known her, likean hour?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Actually about an hour and a half.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I told you it wasnt long, but there is an amazing connection between us.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 You feel that too? Oh, I thought that was just me!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Are you kidding?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Hey, do you want to go away this weekend?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Well see.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Ok, Ross, whats going on here, are we just bringing strange women back to the apartment now?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I dont know, are we just kissing guys on balconies?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 How do you know about that?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Through the magic of sight! I was here, putting our child to sleep...
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Emma.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 When I happened to look through the window and I see you kissing a guy you know, for what? A week?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh, thats what this is all about? Did you bring her up here to get back at me?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 No, actually, see I had to pee, cause I cant use public bathrooms because the doodie parasites.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Ok, Michelle, its time to go.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 Well, call me!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Ok.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Michelle	 No, wait, you dont have my phone number!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 You know, if its meant to be, Ill guess it. Bye, bye.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Score.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, I am sorry, did you not like her, because I was hoping that we could come to one of your kissing parties onthe balcony.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh God, I cant believe youre making such a big deal about this. It was one kiss, one guy, one time!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, really!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Yeah.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Oh, really!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh yeah.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 What about the guy from the bar?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 What? Who?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 The guy you gave your number to.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Whoa, how do you know about that?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Because he called here looking for you. So dont tell me this...this kissing this guy from work is a one time thing,ok? Youve been out there in bars and on balconies for over a month now. And you didnt even have the courtesy to tell me.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Why didnt I get that message?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 What?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 From the guy in the bar, why didnt I get that message?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Because I folded it up and put in my pants pocket. Do you...do you not look there?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Ross?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I never gave it to you.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Why?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I dont know.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh God. You know what? Who you think you are? Who are you to decide what messages I should or should not get?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Who am I?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Yes.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 I am the guy whos taking care of our baby while youre out at bars meeting guys!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh my God, I cannot believe this. You know I actually came in here hoping to have a mature conversation with youAbout us! But I cant do that with someone who hides my messages and brings crazy women back to my apartment!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 None of the sane ones wanted to come back with me! Thats not the point. Ok? The point is you...you are the oneWho moved on and didnt tell anyone!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, this is just so messed up! Whats wrong with us? You know when people hear about our situation theyAlways ask, what, you live together but youre not a couple? And you have a baby, isnt that weird?» And I say No.You know what, its not, because it works for us!» But you know this doesnt work. In fact this is the opposite of working!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Uh, clearly.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 And you know, we said that we would, we would live together as long as this makes sense. An maybe this, you know,Just doesnt make sense anymore.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Ross	 Yeah, maybe not. So what you wanna do?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Hey!
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Hi. Can Emma and I live here for a while?
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Ha, oh, of course.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Rachel	 Thank you.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Joey	 Your eyebrows look weird.
09	13	0913	The One Where Monica Sings	Chandler	 Jeremiah was a bullfrog. Was a good friend of mine, never understood a single word he said, but I helped himdrink his wine. So you just touch yourself for anything?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Morning, roomie!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Hey! You remembered to put clothes on this morning.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Fifth day's a charm.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, Joey, it's so great to be back here. I gotta tell you, you're      making it so easy on me and Emma.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey, it's great having you back. You know, stay as long as you want,      and when does she stop crying all night?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Hey, you're not naked! So hey, Rach, when will we expect to see you      tonight?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, I'll probably be back to pick her up around six, but she's      in the bedroom all ready to go. But she did actually fall back to sleep,      so...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 She's probably exhausted from all that adorable screaming she did      last night.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Bye!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Bye! Hey, I hope Emma isn't making it too hard on you.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 No, hey, it's been great.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Yeah?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Yeah. And look, I just want you to know that with Rachel staying      here and everything, all my feelings from before are totally over, okay?      And even if they weren't, when you accidentally walk in on a woman using      a breast pump...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Yeah, that'll do it.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Wow! So, how are you?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 I'm, I'm okay. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Really?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Sure, I mean, do I wish me and Rachel living together would have      worked out? Of course. You know, I'm disappointed, but it's not like it's      a divorce.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Well, actually it...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 No, it's not a divorce, it is not a divorce! Anyway, I think Rachel      and I need to, you know, get on with our lives, maybe, maybe start seeing      other people.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Wow, really?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Yeah, sure, why not? In fact, if you know anyone that would be good      for me...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Sure, I know lots of girls. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Yeah? Any names come to mind?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Ooh, names?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Hey.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey. I was just gonna get something to eat. You want something?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 What you got?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Okay, let's see, we got strained peas,      strained carrots... Ooh! Strained plums. We haven't tried that yet.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Goodie! Thanks. So, how is it living with Rachel again? I mean, apart      from the great food.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 I'm fine, I'm fine, it's just, it's just weird what's happening with      her and Ross. You know, yesterday he asked me to fix him up with somebody.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh my god, Rachel asked me if I knew anyone for her too.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Why are they doing this?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 I don't know. They're so perfect for each other; it's crazy.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 You know what's crazy? These jars. What is it, like two bites in      here?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 I just wish they'd realise they should be together.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 I know, I know. And when they moved back in together, I figured y'know,      that's where things were headed.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 I know. They should be a family. They should get married and have      more children.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Yes, and they should name one of their kids Joey. I may not have      kids; someone's gotta carry on the family name.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 You know what? Maybe once they start dating, and they see what's      out there, they'll realise how good they are for each other.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Yeah, because it is slim pickings. I had this date last night: Yuck!      But we should probably keep it down; she's still in the bedroom.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 So, what are we gonna do? Are we just gonna go ahead and set them      up with people?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 I know; that just pushes them further and further apart. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Yeah.  Oh, I know what we can do. We could set Ross and Rachel      up on horrible dates, so that they'll realise how good they are together.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Ooh, that's a great plan! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Yeah, you know what the best part of it is? I get to do my "plan-laugh." 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Shhh! Not so loud, we don't wanna wake up, uh...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Hey!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Hey!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 You guys aren't doing anything tonight, are you?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 See, now, why would you assume that? Just because we're married?      I will have you know that we are very hip, happening people. Now, if you'll      excuse me, I have to get back to reading the obituaries.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 I was just asking 'cause I need someone to watch Emma tonight.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Sure, we'll do that. What are you up to?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, Phoebe set me up on a date. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh my god.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Wow.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Why? What's the big deal?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Just figured, 'cause you and Ross are...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 What, slept together a year and a half ago? Yeah, I'm all set.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Well, I think it's great that you're going on a date, you know? I      mean, it sounds healthy. I mean, you have needs. Embrace your womanhood!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 You want a job? Turn off "Oprah," and send out a resume!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 So I'll bring her by around seven? Is that okay?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh, it's perfect.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, you guys are gonna have so much fun! She's at such a cute age.      Oh, a couple things. Now that she's eating solid food, she poops around      the clock. And watch out for your hair, 'cause she likes to grab it. And      oh, she's also in this phase where if you leave the room, she screams bloody      murder, but ah... Thanks, you guys. Have fun!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Suddenly I wish I was reading my own name.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Ooh, Joey. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Hey. I'm so excited; I just set up Rachel with the worst guy tonight. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 All right! Who is he?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Well, it's this guy I used to massage. And by massage, I mean hold      down so he wouldn't turn over and flash me.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Okay, okay. Wait till you hear who I got      for Ross.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 She's this really boring woman. She's a teacher! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 A teacher?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, she's really into history and foreign movies... And oh,      oh, she loves puzzles. Huh? Come on, who loves puzzles?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Well, Ross does. What... You're - you're ruining the plan! Joey,      you've - you've fixed him up with his perfect woman! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Oh my god, you're right! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Yeah.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 She even reads for pleasure!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 How do you even know a woman like that?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 What? I'm not allowed to know smart women? 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Joey.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 I met her at the library. I went in to pee.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 So now what do we do?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Well, okay, I'll - I'll just call her and tell her the date's cancelled,      and find him somebody else.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 What if we don't find him somebody else? We'll just tell her the      date's off, but we don't tell Ross, and he goes to the restaurant and gets      stood up!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Ooh...I hear that's bad. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Ooh, so this is great! Rachel's gonna have a terrible date, Ross      gets stood up, and then they'll realise how good they have it together.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Ah, yes, The Plan! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 It's not Santa's plan. No, it's... 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Yeah, you know, it's not that fun.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 No, I think we killed it.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Emma? Emma? Look at me! Well, I think I'll go downstairs for a while.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 No, no, no, no! No, no, no, no! It's okay, it's okay. I didn't go.      Don't cry, it's just a bit! I'm your uncle Chandler; funny is all I have!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Okay, just so you know, I'm gonna be ovulating from tomorrow until      the sixth, so don't touch yourself in the next 48 hours.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I don't do that.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I'll try to stop. Wait, did you say until the sixth?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Yeah.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Today is the sixth.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 No, it's not.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Yes, it's also 2003.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh my god. Today's the sixth?! I may be done ovulating! I may have      also served some very questionable meat at the restaurant.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 It's okay. Go take the test and see if we're okay.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Okay.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Tough crib.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Hey, where are all my ovulation-sticks? There's only one here.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I might have checked to see if I was ovulating a couple times.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Chandler!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I am not working. There's not much to do around here!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Excuse me, is there a woman waiting at the bar? Someone average height,      dark hair, perhaps doing a puzzle?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Uh, there's a drunk Chinese guy.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Well, if I'm still here in an hour, buy him a drink on me.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Can I get you another glass of wine? 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Nah, I don't know if I should. I don't wanna be drunk when I go home      alone.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Got stood up, huh?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Yeah, it's no big deal. It's just a blind date.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Are you worried your date came, saw you, and left?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 No! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 We're okay. I'm still ovulating.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Oh, good, because as of four o'clock this afternoon, I am not. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 So, let's do this.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I - I don't think I can.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Come on. I know you're not eighteen anymore, but give it a minute.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Because of Emma.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh my god, Emma. Oh, sweetie, I forgot you were here. Oh, you're      right, we can't do this. We can't leave her alone.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Sorry.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Unless... Maybe we do it here. I mean, how much can she even be aware      of at this age?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Well, she's aware when we leave the room. She may notice if we start...      canoodling in it.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Canoodling?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Well, I can't say "hump" or "screw" in front      of the B-A-B-Y.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 I don't know. I mean, I guess having sex in front of a baby isn't      so...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Horrifying? Scarring? Something people go to jail for?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 I guess you're right.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 You guess I'm right? When we stayed at that bed and breakfast, you      wouldn't have sex with me because you thought a deer was staring through      the window.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 But what kind of a sick bastard wants to do it in front of a deer?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Wow, everything looks so good! I think I'm gonna have the chicken.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I - I just have to say this; you're really beautiful.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, well, that's - that's very sweet. Thank you.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I'm kind of funny looking. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 What?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 Oh, come on, you're way out of my league. Everybody in here knows      it. Bet that guy over there's probably saying, "ooh, why she out with      him? He must be rich!" Well, I'm not! 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 So, what do think you wanna order? I'm really      excited about that chicken.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I'm not funny either. So, if you were thinking, "well, he's      not that good-looking, but maybe we'll have some laughs"... That ain't      gonna happen.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, come on, Steve; let's not rule out nervous laughter. Hey, now      wait a minute. Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant.      That's impressive.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I lost it. To drugs. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I silk-screen t-shirts now.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Really? What's that like?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 It's really fulfilling doing something you hate for no money. That's      right. I have no money, I'm not funny, I live in a studio apartment with      two other guys, and I'm pretty sure I'm infertile.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Now, come on, come on, Steve. There must be something      that you like about yourself. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I do like my hair.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Really? 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Hello?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Phoebe, it's me. I'm going to hunt you down and kill you!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Hey, Rach!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 This is the worst date ever. How could you set me up with this creep?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 You know, you are talking about one of my dear, dear friends. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 I don't care! This guy is a nightmare!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh, right, so he gets a little crazy when he's stoned.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 He's not stoned.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Did he go out for a cigarette? 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Yeah, four times.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 My dear, sweet Rach.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Well, our plan is working. Rachel is having a miserable      time, and Ross is just stood up somewhere at a restaurant all alone.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Oh, great, pretty soon they'll be back together.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 By the time anyone's figured out what we've done, we'll be in sunny      Mexico.  Oh, wait, that's the end of a different plan.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 She's asleep. Chandler?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 What are you doing?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Emma was doing it!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 She's asleep.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Ooh, she's asleep, that means we can...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Yes, but we have to be fast.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Okay, I'll try. And you can't make any noise.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Okay, I'll try. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hello?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Emma? Hey! Hi!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 How are ya? How are ya? Where are your babysitters, huh? Why's the      bedroom door closed?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 You can't have S-E-X, when you're taking care of the B-A-B-I-E!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 I've got bad news. The Chinese guy left. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Eh, if it was meant to be, it's meant to be.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Look; you got stood up, who cares? We're gonna show you a good time.      Just sit and relax. In fact, let me bring you a crab cake appetizer on      the house.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Wow, free crab cakes. Well, that's nice. Although I was hoping to      have sex tonight.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Ooh... 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Just the crab cakes.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter #2	 What are you      doing? Are you trying to get him to stay? Because you can't do that.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Just get out of here, okay?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 What's - what's going on?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Eh, okay, the waiters have a little pool going. We have a bet on      how long it'll take before you give up and go home.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 What? You - you're making money off my misery?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Well, if you stay till 9:20, I am.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 This is unbelievable. I - I have never been so insulted in my life.      Now, if you'll wrap up my free crab cakes, I'll be on my way.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Well, that was weird. You were loud, and I was fast.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 I think we may have really done it this time.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh, I wish I didn't have to wait to take a pregnancy test.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 You may wanna get some more of those too.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Where's Emma?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh my god, where's Emma? Where's Emma?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Don't ask me, I was in there canoodling you!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Okay, okay, I'm sure that Rachel came home early and picked up Emma.      You go look across the hall, and I'll call her cell.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Okay. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Hey, you better hope that we're pregnant, because one way or another,      we're giving a baby back to Rachel.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I - I can't believe Im crying in front of you. You must      think I'm so pathetic.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 No, no, no, I admire a man who can cry.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 Really?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Don't touch my coat!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, sorry, it's my phone. Hello?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Hey, Rach, how's it going?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh my god, this is the worst date ever!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Look, you know what, I'm sorry, but did you really think      that this was going well?  What's up?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Hey, did you stop by here?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 No.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh my god, then...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh, thank god! Emma, there you are!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 What? What do you mean, "there you are"? Where was she?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Oh, we were playing "peek-a-boo." She just  she loves      it when I'm dramatic.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Why the hell did you take her?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Because you two were having sex!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 No, we weren't!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Don't you lie to me! I could tell by Chandler's hair.       You are so lazy. Can't you get on top for once?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 All right, all right, we were. We were trying to make a baby. Monica's      ovulating.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey! It is unacceptable that you two would have sex with Emma in      the next room. I'm gonna have to tell Rachel about this. 
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 No, no, no.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 No, please don't. Please, Joey. She will kill us!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey, I gotta! Unless...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Monica	 Unless what?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Unless you name your firstborn child Joey.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 What? Why?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Hey, I may never have kids, and somebody's gotta carry on my family      name.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Chandler	 Your family name is Tribbiani.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	   You almost had me.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, uh...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 Look, I think I know the answer to this question, but... Would you      like to make love to me?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Really, really not.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 Eh, it's just as well. Doesn't work anyway.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 All right, well that's good to know. Good night, Steve.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Hey, what's wrong?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 I just had a rough night.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Oh. Crab cake?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Eww!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Well, what happened?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, well, I...It's kind of weird talking to you about this, but...
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Monica told me you had a blind date.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Yeah.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 I did, too.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 But is it technically a date if the other person doesn't show up?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh, oh no. Do you think she walked in, saw you and left?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Why does everyone keep saying that?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, if it makes you feel any better, I wish my date hadn't shown      up.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 That bad?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be      appropriate to give me this.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Female body inspector? What size is that?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Now, wait a minute. So, they're gonna name their first child Joey?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Uh-huh.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 How - how do I get them to name the next one after me?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 It's easy, you just walk in on them having sex.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh, so they owe me like, three Phoebes.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh my god! Look, it's Ross and Rachel. Oh, the plan is working.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Don't, don't do the plan-laugh.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 The first date we've had in months, and they were both such disasters.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Rachel	 Oh. Huh. You know, it is weird that Phoebe would      set me up on a date that was awful on the same night that Joey set you      up on a date that didn't even show.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 Wait a minute; you don't think it was intentional? I mean, that's      just stupid.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 We're geniuses! Yeah, look at them, look at them, they're really      bonding.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, they're falling in love all over again.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Oh, they see us! Oh, they, they look mad. Oh, they figured it out.      They're coming this way. Run!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Where?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Phoebe	 Mexico!
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 Can you believe they're still not here?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Ross	 I know. A double blind date, and we both get stood up. What are the      chances?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 I know, I'm so bummed. Can we have our free crab cakes now?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 What?
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Joey	 We've been stood up.  And we want our free crab cakes.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Waiter	 Guys, give it a rest. Nobody's betting on you tonight. Although we      do have a pool going to see how long it takes that guy to cry.
09	14	0914	The One With The Blind Dates	Steve	 I have such fat hands!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Uh, ah, Monica's pregnant?!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  Really?  Let's get past the moment.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 What's your news?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Thank you. I got a job in advertising. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  Oh, honey, that's incredible!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Gosh, what's the pay like?  Oh, come on people  come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most!  Hey Joey! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Right. So, it'll be the same except less sex with you. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  That's great.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some ground work which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  Humiliating and noble!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 You know, if I didn't already have a job, I think, I would have been really good in advertising.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Yes, I did, I did!  I should have written it down!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Where's Chandler? I wanna wish him good luck on his first day.  ... and I smelled bacon. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 He just left.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Who did? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	  Joey! You never gonna believe it: she called. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  She did?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	  You got it!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  I did?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 What is she talking about?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 I don't know, but it sounds great. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Your agent called. You got that audition.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 With Lennart Haze?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Yes.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Oh my god, that is great! That is *** for a play on broadway and in a real theatre, not that little one underneath the dally like last time.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Is it a good play?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Well, it must be, because I read and I didn't understand a singe word. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Yeah, and Lennart Haze is starring in it
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, and directing.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  He was so good in that movie of MacBeth. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	  You saw that?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 No, but I saw the previews. They played it right before Jackass.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel, Joey	  Ah!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yeah, he's done some amazing works.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Oh, yeah. Oh, I loved him in those cell phone commercials. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  I know. When the monkey hits him in the face with that giant rubber phone. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Hey! Maybe the monkey will be at the audition!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Don't make me more nervous than I already am!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  Good morning, everybody.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	 Can I get you a cup of coffee, Sir?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Oh, no, no, I'm an intern, just like you guys except for the tie, the briefcase and the fact that I can rent a car.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	 Seriously, you're an intern?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Yeah, well, I'm kinda heading into a new career direction and, you know, you gotta start at the bottom.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	  Dude!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Right. Look, I know I'm a little bit older than you guys, but it's not like I'm Bob Hope  
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 The comedian? USO?!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	  Uhm, it's USA, sir.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Receptionist	 This is Joey Tribbiani. Joey, these are the producers and, as you probably already know, this is Lennart Haze. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 It is so amazing to meet you.  I'm such a big fan of your work.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Well, I've I've been blessed with a a lot of great roles. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Tell me about it! "Unlimited nights and weekends!" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 You making fun of me? Because I am not a sell-out.  I didn't do that for the money, I believe in those phones. I almost lost a cousin because of bad wireless service.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 No, I-I-I wasn't making fun of you, honestly, I-I think you were great in those commercials. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Really?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yeah.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Well, I do bring a certain credibility to the role.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Are you kiddin'? When they shoot you out of that cannon
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Peeeeeooooooooch  "Hang up that phone!" One take!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Wow!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 So, shall we read?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Oh, yah, sure.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Top of act two. This is my entrance. You got it? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "What the hell are you still doing here"?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Err, "I think you know". 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "Bastard"!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "I am what you made me. You know what? I could go right now."
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "Go, go!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "I can't. Oh, I want to, long pause, but I can't."
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 I'm sorry, sorry. You're not supposed to say "long pause"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Oh, oh, I thought that was your character's name, you know, I thought you were like an Indian or something, you know with a 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 No. Thank you so much for coming in. We appreciate it, thank you. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Ah, y-y-you're sure you don't want me to do it again? I could do it with an accent, you know, Southern  "I could go right now, maaan!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	  My god in heaven. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Producer #1	 Joey, hang on for a second. Lennart, can we talk to you for a moment?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 You, you gotta be kidding. See, h-he, he can't act. . 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Hey! I-I-I don't care if he's hot, you know. If you want to sleep with him, do it on your own time.  This is a play. No, listen: if you insist on this, I will call my agent so fast on a cell phone that has a connection that is so clear he's gonna think I'm next door.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Ah, hi, ah. Thank you so much for whispering for my benefit, but, ah, look, if you just tell me what I did wrong, I'd just love to work on it and come back and try it again for you. And, and also:  'How you doing?'  You should, please, just gimme another chance. I really wanna get better, please. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Well, if you wanna come back at the end of the day today, here are my notes. Ready?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yeah.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Uhm, you're in your head. You-you're thinking way too much. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 I really doubt that. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	  No, no, no. It's that you're not connected with anything in your body. There's no urgency. The scene is a struggle, uhm, it's a race. Also, what you did was horizontal. Don't be afraid to explore the vertical. And don't learn the words. Let the words learn you. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Couldn't I just sleep with the producer?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Hey, do you wanna go to dinner tonight?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Oh, I can't. I've got a date with that waitress, Katy, yeah, I know we've been only going out like twice, but I have a really good feeling about her. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Oh, I hear divorce bells. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Mugger	 Alright. Just give me your wallets and there won't be a problem. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  What?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Mugger	 I have a gun 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 O-ok. Just relax, Phoene, just stay calm. . Oh my god, I can't find my wallet. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Mugger	 Alright, lady, now give me your purse!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 No.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  What do you mean "no"? I knew you'd be my death, Phoebe Buffay. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Lowell, is that you?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lowell	 Phoebe?  Oh my god!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Oh my god! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  I'm sorry, Ross, this is my old friend Lowell from the streets. Lowell, Ross.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lowell	 Ross, nice to meet you.  
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Yeah, a real pleasure.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Ah, it's been so long, so long.  I can't believe you're still doing this!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lowell	 Ough, I know, but I quit smoking!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Good for you! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lowell	 So you look like you're doing really well! I guess you're mugging days are behind you?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Ouh 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Oh my god. Phoebe, you used to mug people? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Excuse me, Ross, old friends catching up
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Hey, how did the audition go? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Well, they wanna see me again this afternoon, but, err, well, Lennart Haze did not like me.  
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 What happened?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Well, he said I wasn't urgent enough, you know, and that everything I did was horizontal and I should be more vertical. Oh, and he said that I should think less.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 So far so good! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  Honey, I'm old!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  What's wrong?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 I am so much older than these other interns. I can't compete with them.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 So you're a little older. Try to look at the positive: You have all this life experience.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Yes, but I don't think life experience with these. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Wooooooooow  It's like they're on fire!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 What are they? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 They're these prototype sneakers and come up with ideas on how to sell them which I can't do because no self-respecting adult would ever where these.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  I give you $ 500 for them!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 What am I supposed to do with these?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Ah, come on, sneakers are easy. You wear sneakers all the time.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Well, first of all, they're not called "sneakers" anymore. Apparently, they're called "kicks" or "skids" and I think I heard somebody say "slorps".  And here, look: they've got these wheels to pop out from the bottom so you can roll around 'cause, apparently, walking is too much exercise. Kids, kids, roll your way to childhood obesity!  Would you help me try to sell these?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Okay, have you considered using a girl with huge knockers? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 No, I don't think that's the kinda thing they're looking for. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Hey, that'd work on me! Why did I get to buy Mrs. Butterwords? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	All	 Hey, hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Hey, you'll never guess what just happened Phoebe and I got mugged!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 You okay?!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Yah, because Phoebe knew the mugger! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  How do you know a mugger?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 I'm sorry I have friends outside the six of us. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 You wanna know how she knew him?  Because Phoebe used to mug people. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  Seriously?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Well, I'm not proud of it, but, you know sometimes when I was living on the street and I needed money for food and stuff I
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  Phoebe, that is awful!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Well, ok, I wasn't rich like you guys, ok, I didn't eat gold and have a flying pony I had a hard life, my mother was killed by a drug dealer
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 You're mother killed herself!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 She was a drug dealer!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Well, anyway, it was a good thing Phoebe knew the knew him, because  I was about to do some serious damage! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Okay
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Well, this must've brought back some really bad memories for you, Ross.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Why?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Well, Ross was mugged as a kid.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  You were?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Yeah, it was pretty traumatic. I was outside St. Marc's Comics you know, I-I-I was just there minding my own business, you know, seeing what kinda trouble spiderman got into that week- 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  Wonderwoman!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Anyway, I was heading towards this bakery, you know, to pick up a couple of dozen Linzer torts for someone   when outta nowhere this thug with a pipe jumps out and says: "Gimme your money, punk!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Oh my god
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 I know! And-and the worst part was they took my backpack which had all the original artwork I had done for my own comic book: "Science Boy"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Oh yeah! What was his superpower again?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 A superhuman thirst for knowledge.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 That's it. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Well, I-I better get to class  Are there any more of your friends I should look out for on my way, Phoebe?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 No actually, you might wanna stay away from Jane street that's where stabby Joe works. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Okay, I think we have a problem here. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 What?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Well, uhm, back in my mugging days, you know, I, uhm, I worked St. Marc's Comics. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Yeah?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Well, a pipe was my weapon of choice and, uhm, pre-teen comic book nerds were my meat. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 So?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Well, there was this one kid who had a sticker on his backpack that said-
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe, Monica	 "Geology rocks!" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Oh my god!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 I know I mugged Ross! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Receptionist	 You're late!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  I know, I'm sorry, but can I just have a quick second to run to the bathroom?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Receptionist	 No, Lennart doesn't wait!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 But I'm bursting with u-hu!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	  Joey! Here we go. Let's go very quickly!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Actually, I really need
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	  We must go now, quickly, please.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yes ahahaaa 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Ready? "What the hell are you still doing here?"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  "I think you know!" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "Oh, you sick bastard!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "I am what you made me! You know what?"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "What?"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "I could go right now." 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "Then go, go!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  "I, oh, I can't. I want to, but I can't!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Cut! That was good.  That was very good. You did everything I asked for. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  I did? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Yes. Plus what you've got that I don't know what you've got going this squirmy quality that you bring into the character that I couldn't've even imagined. Wow, hey, here's what we gonna do: come back tomorrow for the final callbacks with the ***, do all of this what you've got going now, but  you know what?  more, more. Can you do that?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Sure, yeah. I don't have time to say thank you because I really gotta go. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	  Look at that: still in character, I like it I plant seeds I can't explain.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 What are you doing?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Putting on the sneakers thought I'd get into a younger mindset, you know, to see if it sparked anything
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Oh, anything yet?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Yes, how's this: They're so uncomfortable it's like getting kicked in the nuts for your feet!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	All	 Hey! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Probably wanna know what I'm doing?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 No, that seems about right.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 Yesterday at my audition, I really had to pee, and apparently, having to pee makes me a really good actor. I got a call-back, so I'm drinking everything. Oh, by the way, that egg nog in our fridge was great!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Joey, that was formula.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 We gotta get more of that. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  You know what these aren't half-bad!  You should suggest something like these to Ralph Lauren.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Rachel	 Okay, first of all, that's stupid and second of all, I'm not allowed to talk to Ralph. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Alright  I feel youger already! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  Yah, I think I broke my hip.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Hey, you!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Hey!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Hey, how was class?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 No one ever asked me that, what's wrong? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Nothing, I really wanna know.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Oh  Well, uhm, there was actually a rather lively discussion about the Pleistocene
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Alright, nothing is worth this. Uhm, I have a confession to make uhm, okay, you know, that girl that mugged you when you were a kid
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Wh-What are you talking about? It wasn't a girl. It was this huge dude.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 You don't have to lie anymore, Ross, I know that it was a fourteen year-old girl.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 No, it wasn't.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Yes, it was. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 No, it wasn't. You don't think I would've defended myself against a fourteen year-old
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  "Gimme your money, punk!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Oh my god, it was you! I can't believe it, you you mugged me? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	  Yeah, and I'm so, so sorry, Ross, I'm sorry, but, you know, if you think about it, it's kinda neat.  I mean, well, it's just that I I've always felt kinda like an outsider, you know, the rest of you have these connections that go way back and, you know, now, you and I have have a great one! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 It's not the best!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 I know, I'm sorry, please forgive me. I don't know what to say
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  There's nothing you can say. That was the most humiliating thing that ever happened to me. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Really? Even more humiliating than
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Hey, let's not do this! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	  and then, at the end of the commercial, the girls get out of the hut tub and start making out with each other!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Boss	  That's interesting! Just one thought: You didn't mention the shoes. Who's next?  Chander
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Okay  You start on the image of a guy putting on the shoes. He's about my age
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Intern	  Your age?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 A-huh. So he's rolling down the street and he starts to lose control, you know maybe he falls maybe hurts himself. Just then, a kid comes flying by wearing the shoes. He jumps over the old guy and laughs, and the line reads: "Not suitable for adults!" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Boss	 Chandler, that's great! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 Oh, thank you, sir or man-who's-two-years-younger-than-me 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Boss	 You see? That has a clear selling point. It appeals to our key demographic, it's.  You did you come up with that?
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	  I don't know, I don' I don' know! I was just trying to get into a young mindset, you know, and it just started to flow.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Boss	 That is great. Good work!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Boss	 See all of you tomorrow. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Chandler	 The cold weather hurts my hip!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Hey, Ross!  I know you're still mad at me, but can I just talk to you for a second? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Sure, go ahead. Whoops, sorry, sure, go ahead. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 I just really wanted to apologize again and and also show you something I think you'll find very exciting. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Oh my god, crap from the street?  
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Look, Ross, in this box are all the things I got from mugging that I thought were too special to sell or smoke.  Anyway, I was looking through it and I found "Science Boy" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Oh my god.  I never thought I'd see this again.  It's all here. What made you save it all these years? 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 I can't say, I just thought it was really good and maybe would be worth something some day. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 You really thought "Science Boy" was worth saving! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 Yeah but you should know, I also have a jar of vaseline and a cat skull in here. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Still this is amazing Oh my god, thank you, Phoebe. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Phoebe	 You're welcome. And thank you for "Science Boy". I learned a lot from him 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 You're welcome. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  "I need an answer!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "I-I-I can't tell you somethin' I don't know."
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "You know!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "I don't know!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "I need an answer now!" 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "Alright, here, you want an answer the answer is"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Oh!
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 "She never loved me, she only loved you."
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	 "You knew this all along and you never told me? You never told me? I can never forgive you, I can never forgive myself, I have nothing to live for  Bang  End Scene!"
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Absolutely amazing!  The part is yours. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Joey	  Oh thanks, thanks! Now, I really have to get
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Lennart	 Wa-wa-wa-wait! Congratulations! You did it! You did it!  You can relax now. Yeah.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	 Wow, that's a big cable bill! Huh, you don't have a job, but you have no problem ordering porn on a Saturday afternoon?!  I was in the house! 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	  Hey, uhm, Phoebe didn't by any chance mention that
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  that she was the huge guy that mugged you? Yah. 
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 I see. You didn't happen to tell
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Monica	  everybody we know? Yeah.
09	15	0915	The One With The Mugging	Ross	 Great. Thanks! 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Did you see our bank statement? Can this be right?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I know...God. I haven't seen my savings take a hit like this since  I was a kid and they came up with double-stuffed Oreos. What happened to all  our money?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 I'm not sure what they did, but I'm inclined to blame Enron.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I guess with you doing the internship, we're just spending more than  we're bringing in.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Maybe I should quit and get a job that pays.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Oh, But you're finally doing something that you love! I can't ask  you to give that up. Though it'd be nice if the thing that you love was y'know...  finding gold.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 You know what? You know what? I think we're making too big a deal  out of this. ok? So we pay our bills a little late this month and maybe next  month we cut back on a few things. And maybe we start eating out of Joey's  refrigerator for a change. You're chef... what can you make out of backing  soda and beer?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Ok worse case scenario is...we borrow some money from my parents.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 No! We're not borrowing money.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Why not?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Because we don't do that. We are Bings! And if there's one thing  my father taught me was... well to always knock before going into the pool  house... but the other thing was never borrow money.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Wow! I Had no idea you had this much pride.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 That's right! I do! And I'm your man. And I'm going to get us through  this situation even if it means you working twice as hard.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I'm gonna go. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Why??
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I haven't been home in a couple of days and I need to get some more  clothes.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh...you don't have to go, I have something that will fit you.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I put that tube top on as a joke.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I want you to stay.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I want to stay too but I've gone as bad as much use out of these boxers  as I can..
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Why don't you turn them inside ou...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Done it.  I'll be back in a couple  of hours.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I'll miss you.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Me too.  You know  what? I just realised something. I don't wanna go home.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Great! Ok...I'll go get the tube top.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 No, no! What I mean is, I hate going back to my apartment now... and  partly because I live above a known crack den but... mostly because when I'm  there, It's just, I really miss you. So.. do you want to move in together?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Wow, Mike Hannigan...You sure know how to make a girl say "Hell  yeah!"
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 So we're doing it?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Yeah! Let's do it! Let's live together!  Oh god, we're really going to move in together!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Yeah!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I've always wanted to live with a guy. "Pick up your socks!" "Put  down the toilet seat!" "No! We're not having sex anymore!" It's  gonna be fun!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Hey Joey!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Hey!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Listen...I need to know that what I'm about to ask you, will never  get back to Chandler.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about it myself. Chandler is  my best friend, it would be wrong. Good......But wrong.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	  Ok first of all...It would be great. But that's  not what I'm here to talk to you about. I need to borrow some money.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Aww, I don't know Monica y'know... erm... lending friends money is always  a mistake.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 But Chandler lent you money!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 And I think he would tell you it was a mistake.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Come on...I just need it for some rent and..and some other bills.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oh...how much?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Two thousand dollars?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Two thousand dollars!? What do you think I am? I soap opera star!?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Yeah...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 That's right I am! 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Hi you guys!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey, Monica	 Hey!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oo...what's in the bag?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Oh er... well you know Emma started crawling? I realised that this  place, is very unsafe for a baby. So I went to the store and got some stuff  to baby-proof the apartment.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oh...baby-proofing... Why is this such a big deal now? Y'know, when  I was a kid it was like.. "Whoops! Joey fell down the stairs!" or  er.. "Whoops! Joey electrocuted himself again!" Huh!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Anyway erm, are you going to get a handyman to install this stuff?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 No. I was just going to do this myself. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 You're gonna do it?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Yeah, Why? You don't think a woman can do this?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oh, women can. You can't.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Monica...would you please tell Joey that he is a pig?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 You're a pig. And you can't do this.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Wha!? What!? Come on! I found the hardware store all by myself!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 The hardware store is right down the street.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 There is a hardware store right down the street?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Hey you guys! Ok, we've got great news.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Phoebe and I are moving in together.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica, Chandler, Ross	 Congratulations!/Good for you!/Great!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I know it's so exciting! You know I've never lived with a guy before.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Well you know it's just like living with a girl. Only they don't steal  your makeup. Unless they're playing "This is what my sister would look  like" 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Yeah.... she's not so cute.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I'm gonna go to the bathroom.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Okay, well you put down the toilet seat.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Yes dear.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Is that a bit you guys do?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Uh huh...we're playing you two.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 We don't do that! Tell her we don't do that!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Yes dear.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 I can't believe you guys are moving in together. That's, that's great!  I mean...I'm happy for you guys..
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I hear wedding bells.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Monica slow down! Ok? I'm just excited to be living with him. You  know I mean, I don't know, Can I see someday being married to Mike? Sure! Yeah.  Y'know..I can picture myself walking down the aisle in a wedding dress that  highlights my breasts in an obvious yet classy way. But do I want that house  in Connecticut...you know..near the good schools where Mike and I can send  Sophie and Mike Junior.. Oh my god I do.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Phoebe, I had no idea you were so conventional.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I know! I guess I am! Oh my god! Load up the Volvo I want to be a  soccer mom!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 You ready to go?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Yeah! You bet roomy!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Don't you mean..groomy?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 What are you talking about?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh please, these guys, we haven't even moved in yet and they have  us picking out china patterns. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 China patterns!!!!!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 This is easy...Can't do this!  Oh! Wow! Seriously I can't do this. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Hey Joe!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Hey!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Listen er..I need to ask you a favor but you can't tell Monica anything  about it.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 I thought you didn't have secrets from Monica.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 And that would have made the official party line.  Monica  and I are having a little financial trouble.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Yeah, I know.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 What? What do you mean you know?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Err... I just figured it out! You know, I mean you're not working and  the economy is bad.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Oh! Right.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	  That's the fastest I have ever thought!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Anyway, err... I need to borrow some money.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oh! Sure! How much? Two thousand dollars?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Yes! Two thousand dollars exactly! How do you know that! 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Err...Well I...Know how much you used to make and I know how much your  rent is. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Oh ok.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	  I am on fire!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Listen...this is really nice. Do you...   Did you write a cheque to Monica for two thousand dollars?  Did Monica borrow money from you?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Err... Kind of.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 I can't believe her! Did she tell you we were having money problems?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Oh no no no no no... It wasn't... It wasn't because of your money problems,  it was for something for her.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 What?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Something personal.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 What would she get for herself for two thousand dollars that she  wouldn't tell me about?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Woman	 Excuse me.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Boob job.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I don't want her to get a boob job! That's crazy!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Well it's...It's not that crazy okay? Making them smaller, that would  be crazy.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Well hey, I wanna ask you about Monica's little "groomy" joke.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh! Alright. Well I think the reason people laugh is becuase it's  a play on the word roomy.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I get the joke. Sophisticated as it was. Now the thing I wanna say is...  maybe we should have talked about this before. Us living together, you're not  expecting a proposal, right?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh no! No no! Not at all. We're just moving in right now. See where  it goes.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Yeah well, that's the thing. For me it's as far as it can ever go.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 What do you mean?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Look. Phoebe, I-I love you. Very much. But I never want to get married  again.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh. Wow.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 It's just my first marriage was, you know such a disaster. I kind of  lost faith in the whole idea.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Was it really that bad?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 At one point near the end she deliberately defecated.....
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Ok, well that's bad. But don't you think it might be different with  someone else? Perhaps a blonde who always uses a toilet. Except for once in  the ocean.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Look it's not about who I would marry. And I was certain the first time  I got married it would last forever. And I was totally wrong!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 But it's just...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Look Phoebe, It's not about you. I just never wanna get married again.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I'm sorry. Are you ok with that? Cause if not...maybe us moving in together  isn't the best idea.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 No! I definitely don't wanna get married. No I just wanted to make  sure you didn't want to too. Whew! Coz you know when we move in and you start  changing your mind there's gonna be hell to pay mister!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Trust me, I will never...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Yeah I get that.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Hi!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 So you gave in and decided to call someone?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Yeah, I don't know who I was kidding. I can barely use chopsticks.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Handyman	 You're all set. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Oh thank you so much.  Oh oh wait!  You forgot your erm...Your game. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Handyman	 Thanks.....
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Hey Rach! There she is...My perfectly proportioned wife.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Don't look at me I never get his jokes.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Thank you?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Oh no..don't thank me. Thank you. You know there's not one thing  I would change about you? Not one single thing! And definitely not... two...  single things.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Ok, you're being wierd. Do you want sex or did you do something bad?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 No no! I just love the way you look, I am warm, for your form.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Ok..You know the old classics you know,You look nice? They're still  ok.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Well yes yes... You look nice can mean that your face looks nice.  I want to compliment your body. I mean..I wouldn't change it. At all. And more  specifically, I wouldn't want anything to get any bigger.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Okay...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 I mean, You wouldn't want any part of me to get any bigger would  you? Don't answer that.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Just when you thought that dude couldn't get any wierder.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I know why do you think he was so worried about me getting bigger?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 I don't know! I mean, what brought that on?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Oh my god. We're trying to get pregnant so he's probably starting  to freak out about the fact that my body is going to change.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 No you really think that's what it is?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 You heard him! "No bigger!" "You're perfect!" "Just  don't get any bigger!" Oh my god he sounded just like my high school wrestling  coach. You know what? I'm going to have to talk to Chandler.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Yeah! If you don't I will! Of course your body's gonna change. Your  breasts are gonna get bigger, your ass is gonna get bigger, you're gonna lose  bladder control.  God! It's just such a magical time!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Hi
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Hey!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Listen, I wanted to ask you something about marriage.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Oh great now you're seeking me out to make jokes? I mean I can see for  all hanging out but to come to my home!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 No...I really wanted to know how you feel about it.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Why?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Mike doesn't ever wanna get married.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Never?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Never.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 wow, are you still going to move in with him?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I want to, but I just want you to tell me that marriage isn't really  that big a deal. You know that I won't, I won't be missing out on anything.  That marriage stinks!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Yeah, marriage... stinks! I mean if you wanna see a man gain weight  and a woman stop shaving? Get them married.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 That's not how you really feel is it?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 No, I'm sorry. Look I don't think that's what you wanna hear right now  but I can't help it. I love marriage.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Seriously? You divorce-o?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 If you have to call me name, I prefer "Ross the Divorcer".  It's just cooler. Look, I know my marriage isn't exactly work out. But I love  to be that committed to another person. And Carol had some good times before  she became a lesbian... and once afterward. I'm sorry.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 It's ok that's how you feel.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 But come on! I mean living together will be great! I mean you guys have  so much fun and you love Mike.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I do love Mike.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Yeah see? And you are so excited about moving in together before, and  you know what? You should be. It's a big deal!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Yeah I guess you're right. Yeah thanks. This helped. Thanks.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 The Divorcer, to the rescue!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 It's not cooler.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Yeah I just hurt it.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Rach?!  Rachel!!!!?  So I can't do anything I like????
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Hey Rach! Ah........ Perfection.  Wouldn't change  a thing. Not a thing.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Honey?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Yeah?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 About that? Erm...I'm going to change.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 But honey you don't have to.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I'm going to get bigger!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Honey I... I love your breasts the way they are!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Argh. fascist
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Well, my breasts are going to get bigger weather you like it or not!  And you know what? It's not just my breasts. My ass is going to get bigger  too.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 your ass?!?!?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Man, don't be surprised if her hands and her feet get bigger too!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 They...do that?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 It's kind of a package deal!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 God why why would you want to do that to yourself!?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 I thought I was something that we both wanted!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Alright look, if it means that much to you, a may be able to get  on more with the big boobs. But the giant ass and the big clown feet?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Oh my god Chandler! If you can't handle this, what are you going to  be like in the hospital? With the blood and the screaming and the little present  that's shooting out of her!?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	  What?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Joey! Why did you tell Chandler that Monica was getting a boob job?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Because she is!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 Joey, Chandler knows I borrowed the money.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Mmmm hmm! For your boob job!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica, Rachel, Chandler	 It's over/Joe!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 OK so I'm out four thousand dollars and nobody's boobs are getting any  bigger?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Hey! What do you guys think about this. "Ross: The Divorce-Force".
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Better.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Very cool.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Hey Pheebs, you know I'm i'm really glad you came to talk to me the  other day and I hope I was a little helpful.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Oh yeah you were helpful! Yeah, no, thanks you.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Good, good. Yeah coz the more I thought about it, the more I realised  I don't think marriage is neccessarily the right path for you.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 What do you mean?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Well, I know the other day in the coffeehouse you were caught up in  the whole soccer mom thing? but is that really you? I mean can you honestly  picture yourself in a Volvo?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 They are awfully boxy...
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 I don't know you'd be so bored with marriage. I mean it's so... normal.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Uh huh.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 Hey hey, can I help?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Well! We er..climbed up four flights of stairs, manueveored a narrow  hallway, dodged a rabid pitbul... but these last three feet are where it gets  really tricky.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Ross	 You know sometimes your words... they hurt.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 Hey uh, where do you guys want this?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 Yeah, seriously coz this is really heavy.  I  mean not for me because i'm only pretending to hold this, but for these guys.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Just one last time erm... the marriage thing... there's no wiggle  room? None at all?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 No but... You don't want to get married either right?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Right. Except that I do want to get married.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	  Couldn't have this conversation down at the truck huh?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 You wanna get married?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Someday.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Aaaaand....... hernia.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I haven't exactly had a normal life and I never really felt I was  missing out on anything but it just feels that now it's my turn some of the  regular stuff.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 But if you wanna get married why didn't you say something before?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Because I just didn't know how much I wanted it. And I love you, and  I wanted to live with you.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I want to live with you too! Let's do that!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 But I don't think I can! it was ok to move in when I didn't know what  was gonna happen, but I can't move in knowing that nothing is ever gonna happen.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Can we at least try living together? I mean you might change your mind  about marriage.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Are you gonna change yours?
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 No.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Me neither. I think I need to be with someone who wants what I want.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 But I don't want this to end.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 I don't want it to end either.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 I can't believe this is gonna end. I guess I'll have my stuff packed  up.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Phoebe	 Yeah.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Mike	 Ok... so... Goodbye.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler, Joey, Rachel, Monica	 Bye bye Mike!/Cya mike!/Bye mike!/Bye bye now!
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Rachel	 I'm so sorry Pheebs.
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Monica	 We're all sorry... 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Chandler	 Ah, look on the bright side, I mean you won't have to live with  this ugly chair! That was here already huh? I love you. 
09	16	0916	The One With The Boob Job	Joey	 AH HAH! I DID IT! HA HA! Alright...  Better take all I can carry. Who knows when i'll be able  to get in here again!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Hey! Ready to go?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Oh yeah, let me just finish this.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Hey Ross, check this out!  yeah, I can't do that!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 What are you doin'?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Have you seen this? It's a new alumni website for college! It's cool! You can post messages for people, let everyone know what you're up to.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Great, a faster way to tell people that I'm unemployed and childless .
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 It's actually kinda interesting to find out what people are doing... remember Andrea Rich?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 The tall girl who wouldn't sleep with you?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Uh uh... well, her Internet Company went under and she lost an ear in a boating accident... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Bet she'd sleep with you now... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 No... I already e-mailed her.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Let me see what you wrote about yourself: "Doctor Paleontology, two kids... "  You split with Carol because you have different interests?... I think you split with Carol because you've one very similar interest!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 You know what? I'm gonna finish this later, ok? Let me just grab my coat.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Hey! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  What do you think you learnt how to do in the last two minutes?? 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Maybe we finish this for him!  "Also I cloned a dinosaur in my lab. She's now my girlfriend. I don't care what society says. It's the best sex I've ever had"... aaand SEND!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	  No, no, no... what do... you can't do that to him!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  Alright, let's go!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Dude! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 I think you made it clear you cannot be trusted with the ball inside the house!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	  aaand SEND! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Hey! How was basketball?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Oh, it was a lot of fun right up until Chandler got a finger in the eye!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh, no! Who did that?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Chandler... hey...  Rach... what's Hugsy doin' in the crib with Emma? 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. That's all right? Isn't it?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	  Oh, yeah... of course... yeah... it's a stuffed animal... you know... it's for kids... not for adults... I know that!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Joey... are you sure? I mean, I know how much you love him!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Rachel... let's be clear on this, ok? I do not love Hugsy. I like him a normal amount... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 All right... Oh, Emma loves him!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Why wouldn't she? He's a wonderful person!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Hi.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Hey Phoebe... how you doin'? You feelin' better?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Breaking up sucks! Oh, I really miss Mike!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Oh, I'm so sorry!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Oh God, I tried everything to make myself feel better. I even tried writing a song about it... but... I can't think of anything that rhymes with AARRGGHH!!  Hey Monica, I really need your help getting through this... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 You're not gonna need my help?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Well no, when I get to the point where... you know... I'm ready to hear cruel mocking jokes about Mike... I'm gonna come to you.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Oh good, 'cause I've already thought of 3... 4! I've just thought of a fourth 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Ok. I mean I know I did the right thing. You know, Mike never wants to get married and I shouldn't be in a relationship that has no future... but... pretty soon I'm gonna miss him so much. I'm gonna wanna see him again and you have to stop me from doing that.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Ok, you got it!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	  Unless... Maybe it's too crazy about this... Alright so... you know, there is no future... but that doesn't mean we still can't have fun. You know what? Forget what I said.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Really? If that's what you want... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 That was a test and you just failed.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Damn it! Rookie mistake!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  I have sex with dinosaurs??
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I believe I read that somewhere!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 That only is not funny, it's physically impossible! Ok? Depending on the species I'd have to have a six foot long...   It's not funny!!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I respectfully disagree.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 I can't believe you put that on my alumni page!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Who cares? Nobody reads those things
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 You'd better hope not because I just read what you put on your page today.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I don't have a page.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Oh oh oh! I RESPECTFULLY DISAGREE!!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Look at you, all sweet and innocent, sleeping like an angel...  with Emma's chubby little hands wrapped around ya.  It's okay, Emma, you stay asleep. 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 : Step away from the crib, I have a weapon!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 It's okay, it's okay Rach, it's me. Put down the scrunchy.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 What are you doing?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Well, I heard Emma stirring, so I came to make sure she could reach Hugsy.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh, oh thanks. Alright well, now that I'm up I'm going to go to the bathroom.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	  There you go sweetie...   This isn't over.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Alright, wait a second, why would Ross tell everyone in your class that you are as...   "gay as the day is long"?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Because I told everyone he slept with dinosaurs.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 But that's clearly a joke. This could easily be true. 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Would you get that please? People have been calling to congratulate me all day.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	  Hello? No, he's not here. Yeah, this is his wife. Yeah, well, it came as quite a shock to me too. I guess I should have known. Yeah, I mean, he just kept making me watch Moulin Rouge.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Hang up, hang up. And that was a great movie!  I'm so gonna get back at Ross... oh yeah, this will show him, here we go .
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 What are you doing?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Oh, you'll see my friend.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  I'm dead?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	  And so young.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Posting that I died? That really isn't funny.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Well, how you died was funny.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Oh please, hit by a blimp?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 It kills over one americans every year.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Unbelievable, my classmates are gonna think I'm dead, my professors, my... my parents are gonna get phone calls. You're messing with people's feelings here.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 You wanna talk about people's feelings? You should have heard how hurt professor Stern was yesterday when I told him I wouldn't be able to go with him to Key West!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 You've really crossed the line here, but that's okay, it's ok 'cause I'm on my way to buy some Photoshop software and a stack of gay porn. That's right! Your coming out is about to get real graphic.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 God, I wish Mike were here.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Okay if Mike were here what would the two of you be doing?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 What are you, animals? It's 4 o'clock in the afternoon!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 I gotta call him. Just to talk to him, there's no harm in that.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Phoebe, that's how it starts. I don't need to eat the cake, I'll just smell the icing... why don't I just eat a little sliver, or, okay, just a slice or two. And next thing you know, you're 210 pounds and you get wedged in going down the tunnel slide. Phoebe, honey, I know this is hard. Look, if you talk to him, you're going to wanna see him. And if you see him, you're going to want to get back together with him. I know that's not what you want.  Give me your phone.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Here.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 And now your cell.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Okay 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 This is your cellphone?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Yes.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 This is your current cellphone?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Yes, it reminds me of a simpler time.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Phoebe, where's your purse?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 No, no! Give it to me!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 You can't have it.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Give it to me!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 No 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 I'll go in there.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	  Oh yeah.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Phoebe come here
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Haha!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Damn you Monica Geller hyphen Bing!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Hey, look who's here! It's Joey, and he brought home a friend.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Joey, Emma's right here! You promised not to bring girls home in the middle of the day anymore.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 No, no, it's not a girl, it's...  a brand new Hugsy!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh that's so great, now Emma has two Hugsy's.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 No, no, Emma has one Hugsy, the new Hugsy, huh? The other Hugsy, I don't know, I guess I'll just take it back.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh you know what? When I was a little girl I had a little pink pony named Cotton. Oh I loved her so much, I took her everywhere, I would braid her tail... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Make the transfer! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Oh, no don't worry about that, I swallowed that years ago.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh, I don't think she likes the new Hugsy.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 But he's the same.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Yeah, I think she wants the old one back.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 But he's the same.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Joey, come on!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 He's the same!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	  You're not the same!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Haha!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 You know, it's a lot less surprising to do that after I've buzzed you into the building.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 So Phoebe, why are there men's shoes by the door.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Those are my shoes.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Oh, when you get over this breakup we need to go shopping.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me, but I'm actually feeling a lot better. Yeah, I just kinda want to be alone right now.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Who's that? 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 I ordered Chinese food.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 What are the chances? 1 billion Chinese people and they send Mike!?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	  What are you doing here?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 Phoebe called me.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Phoebe!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, I broke down...  I wanted to see him.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Damnit Phoebe! How did you even call him?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 There is a speakerphone on the base unit... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Base Unit! Think Monica! Think!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 Look, if I wanna see Phoebe and she wants to see... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	  This doesn't concern you!!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 Oh! Sorry, I guess I was thrown off by the mention of my name!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Look, guys, you can't do this, it's just going to make getting over each other, that much harder.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Not if nothing happens. Why can't... why can't we just hang out as friends?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Sure! If you're just gonna hang out as friends, then maybe I'll join ya. You know, I'm your friend  and Mike's friend .
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Sit down.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Oh wow wow wow!! Make room for your friend! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	  So how've you been?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 I've been pretty good!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	  You look really beautiful.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Thanks, you look good too.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Oh no no no no... this is dangerous territory. Keep it clean!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 So how's the piano playing going?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 Actually I've been playing a lot of love songs lately. I've missed you.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 I've missed you too.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 You know, on the way over here, I saw this drunk guy throw up. And then a pigeon ate it!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Hey, Ross, I just wanted to apologize... ..don't tell me you actually made those gay pictures of me?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 uhu uhu, check this out. 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Huh! So that's what I would look like if I worked out... and was being serviced by a policeman. You're not actually going to send these out are ya?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Eh..actually no, I don't need to because your little "Ross is dead" joke didn't work, ok, there were no responses. Nobody posted anything on the website, nobody called my parents, so the joke my friend is on you. Nobody called, nobody wrote anything, nobody cares that I'm dead.  Oh my God! Nobody cares that I'm dead!?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 No, come on, you know that's not true.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 What are you talking about? You get sixty responses just for coming out of the closet! I didn't get one response! And I'm dead!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Well, the gay community is a lot more vocal than the dead community.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 I can't believe this. Not even my geology lab partner? And I carried that guy! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Alright look, let's think about this, ok, do you really think that people are gonna stir up your family at this tragic time? That people are gonna post condolences on a website? This is not about people not caring that you're dead .This is about people not having a decent outlet for their grief.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 You're right. There isn't a decent outlet.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Right, I mean, come on, I'm sure that if you had a funeral or a memorial service, tons of people would come.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Exactly!! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Ross, what're you... what're you... what are you doing? You're having a memorial service for yourself!?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 No! That would be stupid! You're having it for me!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Ross, don't press send, don't press se... !
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 oh, too late, too late! It's sent... oops sorry and so is the picture of you and the police man... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 I'm trying to put Emma down for a nap, have you seen Hugsy?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Original or crappy?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Original.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 No, sorry haven't seen him.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Then what's that big lump under your covers?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 It's Monica, ok?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 That's not Monica!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Alright!! Fine! It's original Hugsy! No, now I know that Emma wants him but he's mine and I need him..
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	  Oh God.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 ... she's being unreasonable!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	  Joey, there is a reason that Emma loves that stupid penguin so much  Oh don't cover its ears!  It's because it reminds her of her uncle Joey!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 It does?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Yeah! And she's comforted by him because she loves her uncle Joey so much.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Really? She... she loves me?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oh yeah! But you know what? If you need Hugsy, don't worry. Emma will totally understand. I won't... but whatever .
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Ok, wait wait wait wait a minute wait a minute, I mean Rach, I mean if if... . If Hugsy means that much to Emma then...  well she can have him.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Oooh... you're sweet, I knew uncle Joey would step up.  Look Emma, look who's baaack!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 Look forget it forget it...  I can't do it.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Rachel	 Are you gonna...  you're going to take Hugsy away from a little child?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Joey	 How do you think I got him in the first place?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Alright you two, I'm gonna go to the bathroom. Now I don't want anything going on while I'm gone. Here's a few things you can discuss: mucus, fungus and the idea of me and Ross doing it.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 I've missed you so much! No, I'm not gonna ask you to get back together because I know we want different things, but just to be with you one more night.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 I know, I want that too, but IS that going to make it too hard?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 It can't be any harder than this... I mean, If I had known the last time I saw you would be the last time, I... I would have stopped to memorize your face, the way you move, everything about you. If I had known the last time I kissed you would have been the last time...  I never would have stopped.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	  Kiss him, you fool!!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 What?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Didn't you hear that speech? If you don't kiss him then I will!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Oh, I missed you so much! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Strange Man	  I knew you'd be here!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 Oh, crap!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Phoebe	 Who is this?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Mike	 My friend Manny. I asked him to keep me away from you.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Hi, that's what I'm doing for Phoebe!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 Well, you are not doing a very good job!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Excuse me?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 What's with the kissing?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Hey, at least I knew where my guy was.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 Oh yeah yeah, thank God you were here to oversee all the kissing!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 You didn't hear the speech!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 I've heard the speech:  "if he knew it was gonna be the last time he saw her... "
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Hey, it was very moving! You're just heartless!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 You're weak!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 You're... weird!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 Your pants are undone!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Oh !
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	  Where did they go?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Damn it!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Manny	 Oh we blew it. I blame myself.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 And I blame you too.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 It's been an hour and not one of my classmates has shown up! I tell you, when I actually die some people are gonna get seriously haunted!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 There you go! Someone came!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Ok, ok! I'm gonna go hide! Oh, this is so exciting, my first mourner! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 Hi, glad you could come.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	  Please, come in.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Tom	 Hi, you're Chandler Bing, right? I'm Tom Gordon, I was in your class.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Oh yes, yes... let me... take your coat.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Tom	 Thanks... uh... I'm so sorry about Ross, it's... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 At least he died doing what he loved... watching blimps 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Who is he?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Some guy, Tom Gordon.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 I don't remember him, but then again I touched so many lives. 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 So, did you know Ross well?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Tom	 Oh, actually I barely knew him. Yeah, I came because I heard Chandler's news. D'you know if he's seeing anyone?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	  Yes, he is. Me.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Tom	 What? You... You... Oh! Can I ask you a personal question? Ho-how do you shave your beard so close?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	  Ok Tommy, that's enough mourning for you! Here we go, bye bye!! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Tom	  Hey, listen. Call me.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Ok! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  I'm dead and no one cares?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 I look like a man??
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Please, one ridiculous problem at a time!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 It isn't ridiculous, look around! No one's here!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 You gave them one day's notice, not everyone in our class checks the web site everyday and Monica... it's probably the way you stand!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Yes, you're right. Still somebody must have seen it... I mean, I went to that school for 4 years, I didn't have an impact on anyone?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Oh, that's not true. You had an impact on me, I mean, it's 15 years later and we're still best friends. Doesn't that count for something?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  Yeah... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I'm sure it's somebody for you. Now, go hide. 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 Hi. I'm here for Ross Geller's memorial service.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Kori? Kori Weston?
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 Yeah... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Wow! You look amazing!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 And you are... 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Chandler, Chandler Bing. I'm not gay, I'm not gay at all.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Monica	 You are married though.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 Don't listen to him, he's in a really bad mood! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 I can't believe that Ross is gone. It is just so sad.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I didn't know Ross and you were so close.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 We weren't but we had one class together. He was such a great guy and he talked so passionately about science. I always remembered him.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Chandler	 I'm sure that would mean a lot to him. And if heaven has a door, I'm sure he's pressing his ear up against it and listening intently.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 I thought so many times about calling him and asking him out. I guess I really missed my chance.
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  But you didn't! I'm still alive!! Kori, I know this is a big surprise for you. It's a long story but the things you just said really made my day! I mean, the fact that you are here means more to me than if this room were filled with people!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Kori	 You sick freak, who does that? I can't believe I had a crush on you! 
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	 Did you hear that? Kori Weston had a crush on me!!
09	17	0917	The One With The Memorial Service	Ross	  No Mum, I'm not dead. I know it's not something to kid about. It was just a practical joke between Chandler and me, but it's over, ok?  Actually no, even if I had died, you would not be left childless.  Monica?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Teleplay	 Sherry Bilsing - Graham & Ellen Plummer
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Story	 Brian Buckner & Sebastian Jones
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Monica, hey, can I borrow the Porsche?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Ok.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Alright!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 But ehm...what is it not?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  A place to entertain my lady friends.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 And what else is it not?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  A place to eat spaghetti.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Very good!  What do you need itfor anyway?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Oh well, the powerball lottery is upto 300 million andthey don't sell tickets here in New York, so...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh! So you're driving up to Connecticut?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Yeah Connecticut...Not WestVirginia.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Hey, maybe I'll drive you up there! I'd like to buysome tickets myself! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Uh!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Yeah with Chandler not getting paid, we could reallyuse 300 million dollars.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yeah, because if I was at my old job we'd say 300million? No thank you!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Hey will you get me tickets too?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Yeah me too. oh! I have an idea. Why don't we allpitch in 50 bucks, we'll pool our money together and then if we win,we'll split it!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Everyone Almost Simultaneously Except Ross	 yeah thats a greatidea!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 No thanks!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 You don't wanna win the lottery?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Uh...sure I do, and I also wannabe King of my own country and find out what happened to Amelia Earhart.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Still on Amelia Earhart?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 The woman just vanished!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Seriously, Ross, you don't want in on this?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 No! Do you know what your odds are of winning thelottery? I...I mean you have a better chance of being struck bylightning 42 times.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yes but there's six of us so we'd only have to getstruck by lightning 7 times.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I like those odds!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Seriously you guys, I can't believe you're going tospend 250 dollars on the lottery, I mean that's such a bunch of boohaki.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 I'll ask. Boohaki?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh oh, we think Emma is about to start talking so we'retrying to be careful about what words we use in front of her.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Yeah so get ready to hear alot of ehm...boohaki,goshdarnit and brotherpucker.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 How do you know she's gonna start talking?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Well when I talk to her I almost feel like sheunderstands what I'm saying.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Kinda like Joey.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 What's that now?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 God! Look at all these tickets! It's so exciting! Youknow I haven't won anything since the sixth grade.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Pie eating contest?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Oh! You assume because I was heavy that's the only wayI could win something? 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 No, I saw a picture of you covered in blueberries.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 That was a good day!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 They're towing your car, they'retowing your car!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 I'm parked in a garage on Morton! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 They're towing a car. And I am seeing...spots.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Oh my god Ross! You don't have Emma!And Rachel you don't have Emma!  Where's Emma? Who hasEmma!?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Joey relax! My mother picked her up two hours ago. Youwere there!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I was?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Racel	 Yes and you talked to her...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I did?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 She dropped off a casserole?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Oh yeah! The casserole lady.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 So, did you come by to watch us win the bigbucks?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Yeah, uh... and then I figured after you win, we couldall go out to the balcony and see a night rainbow with gremlins dancingon top of it!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Don't touch the phone! I'll get it, I'llget it, I'll get it!! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Think he washed his hands?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Hello? Hey Charlie, what do you know?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 What's going on?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Chandler is supposed to find out if he's getting anassistent job at his ad agency. But out of the 15 interns, they areonly hiring three.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Ooh! Tough odds!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Yeah if only it were a sure thing like your24 state lottery!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Look who's coming around!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Damnit. Alright call me whenyou know more.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Did you get it?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 One of the slots got filled.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 By you!?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Sense the tone! No that kid Nate got it.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Oh! I hate that guy! I mean come on kid! Pull up yourpants!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yeah I know.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Well, there's two spots left right?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yeah...I mean I want this so much! I mean, I wannaget one, I want my friend Charlie to get one...Except I don't careabout Charlie.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Hey you guys! Ok, you're not going tobelieve this! I just saw my psychic and she said I was definitely gonnawin the lottery tonight!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Hey that reminds me, I thought we could use some extraluck so I brought a wishbone home from work.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 A psychic AND a wishbone? Guys! Give someoneelse a chance!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Alright, who wants to do it?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Oh can I? Vegetarians never get to do the wishbone.It's really not fair either! You know, just because we don't eat themeat doesn't mean we don't like to play with the carcasses!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Ok, hey Rach?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smellall over my hands.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I'll do it!! It'll get the casserole stink off of mine.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 I hope I win!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Well, it doesn't really matter ... you're both wishingfor the same thing, right?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I can't tell you what I'm wishing for! Else...youknow...won't come true!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Right! .. but we "know" what you're wishing for!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Can't really say!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 I understand, but you're wishing for what we thinkyou're wishing for, aren't you?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I'm not really comfortable withthese questions!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel, Chandler, Monica	 Please, just do it!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 One, two, three!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I won, hey!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 You know what, I'm sure your wish is gonna come true,but, you guys - just in case, maybe a genie will come out if we rubthis lamp!  Ah!! That thinggets hot!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 You know, Ross, just keep making your jokes. How areyou gonna feel if we actually do win?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Uh, you're not gonna win.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh, I know, I know, the odds are against us, butsomebody has to win, and it could be us! And then how you gonna feel?You know, we're gonna be all like "oh everybody, let's take ourhelicopters up to the cape" and you're gonna be all like "oh, I can'tguys, I'll meet you guys up there, I gotta gas up the Hyundai"
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Ok, I've heard myself on tape and I sound nothing likethat.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 I can see the headline now: "Lottery winners' friendfilled with regret eats own arm".
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Why would I eat my own arm?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Well you wouldn't, but we own the paper, we canprint whatever we want.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 You know what, Ross? I'm gonna throw in 50 bucks foryou.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Why?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Because I know that you think the lottery is "boohaki"but we're all here and gonna watch the numbers and have fun. And you'remy brother, and I want you to be a part of this.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 You don't have to do that, I'll pay for myself. But justthe fact that you want me to have fun with you guys - that's so sweet!Come here 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Get a room!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Ok, so now that you're in, what are you gonna do ifwe win?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 I don't know, probably just invest it.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Ooh! Calm down ...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Seriously, that's your fantasy? To invest it? 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh, I'm sorry, did I say "invest it"? I meant "be cooland piss it all away" 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Ooh, ooh, I know! We should pool all own money and buythe Knicks!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 I don't really care about the Knicks.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Oh, you will when I pick you as starting forward.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  You would do that? I never get picked!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 You know, I'm not sure a sports team is the way togo.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 You're not gonna let me buy the Knicks?? I can't believeyou're taking this away from me!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 You're right, it has been you dream for over 15seconds.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	  Uh, how long until they announce thenumbers, Mommy?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	  I'll take this one too  Uh... Mommy?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh, I've gotten into the habit of calling Rachel "Mommy"when we're around Emma. Which I now realize we are not ...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 I'm hoping that if she hears it enough it will be herfirst word.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Although if we're gonna do that, we should probably callme "Daddy" too.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Oooh, I like that, "daddy" 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 I ... I was just talking about Rachel.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	  Oooh, is daddy getting angry? Isdaddy gonna spank me?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	  Well that depends ... have youbeen a baaad gi ..  no I can't.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Hello? Hello? Oh, hey Charlie. Did anybody elsehear? ... What? Susan got it?? How? Oh man, I would have slept withhim!! .. Alright, bye. 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Dude, I'm sorry. But hey, there's one spot left, right?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Well no, Charlie's gonna get that.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Hey, don't say that! You got just as good a chance asanybody else of getting that job!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 He's the boss's son.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Come on, lottery!! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Ooh, you guys, it starts in like 20 minutes.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Ok, here we go. We need to sort out the tickets asquickly as possible to see if we've won. So does anybody have any ideashow to organize this?  Ok, how about this: wedivide them into 6 groups of 40, and the remaining 10 can be read bywhoever finishes their pile first.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Ooh, I have another idea!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 I'm sorry, idea time is over.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Ok, well, are all the tickets in the bowl?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Yeah.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 What about the ones you have on the nightstand?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 There are no tickets on the nightstand!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yes there are, I just saw them a few minutes ago.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Un, no you didn't! You must be mistaken!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Honey, there are like 20 tickets on the nightstand!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Chandler, sense the tone!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Well, well, well, look what mommy found!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Ok, fine!! I bought 20 extra tickets for me andChandler.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Uh! The psychic also said that I would be betrayed.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 I can't believe this, I thought we were all in thistogether!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Hey, you just got in 5 minutes ago!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 3 minutes ago!!! I don't know why that's important ...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 I was with you the whole time we were in Connecticut,when did you even get those?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 When you were reading the dirty magazines withouttaking off the plastic!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  I'll show you how.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Ok, well Monica, suppose one of your "special" ticketswin? How are you gonna feel when you win the lottery and you lose allyour friends?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Please ... if I win the lottery, you guys are notgonna leave me. Someone gave me a basket of mini-muffins last week andI couldn't get rid of you for 3 days!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Chandler, would you just tell her what she did waswrong?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	  She's right, you shouldn't have boughttickets just for us ...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Ahhh!  
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Let me finish ...  however, itdoesn't look like I'm gonna get this job so I can't afford to haveprinciples, so screw you, the tickets are ours!! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 There's the man I married!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 All right, believe me.If you win the lottery, it'sthe last you're gonna hear from us!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Fine! Don't be my friends! I'll buy new friends!Yeah, and then I'll pay for their plastic surgery so they'd look justlike you!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  OH! Alright, you know what? That's it! Iwant my share of the tickets !
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Yeah, I want my tickets too ! And I'm buying the Knicks! And Steffi Graff, ah ah!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Than I want mine, too ! Andif I win I'm gonna put it all into a very low-yield bond.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Oh, you guys! We've got to keep all the ticketstogether 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 No, no! We should divide them up and I should get extra because we used my card to buy them!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Hey, if anybody gets extra tickets, it should be me!This all thing was my idea! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Oh, yeah! Thanks for inventing the lottery!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Ok, that's it! Just give'em to me! I'll split themup! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  Oh!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	  OOOOOHHHHH!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	  Hey, hey!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	  OOOOOHHHHH!  Fine, I can't take it anymore! I'm putting an end to this! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh, if she jumps, I get her tickets.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 No, no! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 If we are not doing it together, we're not doing itat all! So, say goodbye to your tickets! .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Everyone	 NO!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Don't come any closer!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Can I come a little bit closer, valuable things aregetting squished...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 No, what's more important, your friends or money?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Everyone But Monica	 Friends! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Money!  Friends...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Hey Monica, what about your extra tickets?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 They're all in there! Even these five that I hid inmy bra ...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Monica!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Ok, good!  You guys were so scared! There wasno way I was gonna dump this... Oh God, no!  I think I brokeyour bowl.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Go, go, go!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 What a beautiful night to be running around thestreet, looking for tickets. And the wind sure made it fun.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Phoebe, we lost half of them.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 So, what? Monica, we have the winning ticket! Mypsychic said I  was gonna win, remember?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Weird.. your psychic didn't mention anything about thescary pigeon...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 As a matter of fact she said that's how I am going todie.  So, excuse me for being a little skittish.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	  Hey, there's twomessages. These could be from work!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Oh, play them!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Ok, here we go! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Message	  "Hello. Th-this is the pigeon fromthe balcony calling to apologise"  "Ish.. I shouldn't have knocked the tickets out of the pretty lady'shand. It-it was all my fault. Not hers. Bye. Coo."
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Well, I bet that was very hard for him to do.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Second Message	 "Hey Chandler, it's Charlie"
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 This is..shhh!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Second Message	 "Listen, oh... it turns I got the last spot.I'm really sorry man, it was a lot of fun working with you. Give me acall if you want."
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Oh God, I am so sorry honey...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	All	 Oh, so sorry man! Sorry!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh, it is so unfair. It's like that time theypromoted Sandra over me at work.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Oh, is she related to Ralph Lauren?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 No, she was just much better at job than me!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Guys, the drawing is about to start!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  You know what? We should call my mum'shouse and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh yeah, it's a good idea!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	  Honey, you've been really strongabout this, I know how badly you wanted that job.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Yeah, you know, I really thought I deserved it. But... let's go win the lottery... I mean, we still have 130chances to win, right?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 131! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	  Goodnight sweetheart! I love you. Andremember, you're daddy's little girl... Phoebe's totally ruined that for me... 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Hi mum, put her back on!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  Rach, come on!They are announcing the numbers! My God, I can already feel myselfchanging.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Tv	 "Here we are, the official Powerball numbers! We have 53"
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 I got that!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh, we have one too!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 We are on a roll, people!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	  Come on!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  Mum, please!I know you love your newlips, but I can barely understand you! Would you, please, just let mesay goodnight to my daughter?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Tv	 "And number 29! Here we go! The Powerball is 7"
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Check your numbers! Make me rich!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Guys, you're not gonna believe this! I was just saying goodnight toEmma and she said her first words!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	All	 Wow!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 And what did she say?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 She said "gleba"!! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Make me rich!!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  Isn't that amazing?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh yeah, no no no...that's great!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Why-why aren't you more excited?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh, Rach...oh..."gleba" is not a word.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Oh, but of course it is!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Okay, what does it mean?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 I don't know all the words.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 I'm just, I'm just glad I didn't miss my daughter'sfirst words .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Yes you did, gleba is a word!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Ok, use it in a sentence.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Ok... "Emma just said gleba"!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 It's not a word!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Okay, okay, okay, fine, I'm gonna look it up .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Oh, oh, ok, great. You know what, while you're at it shesaid another word the other day, why don't you, why don't you look up:pbbqqt....
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	  Alright, okay, okay, gleba,gleba...  Gleba! Ha! Here it is: the fleshy, spore-bearinginner mass of a certain fungi.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 She's gonna be a scientist! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  Damnit! anybody got anything?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 No.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 I'm still looking through mine...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Just double checking ...no, no, no... No!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	  Hello? Hold on. It's your boss.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Ah, the "I'm sorry I rejected you" phone call. I'mnot used to getting it from guys.  Hey, Steve.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Steve	 Chandler, hi! I'm sure you've heard we filled the threepositions. We just felt that with your maturity and experience, youwouldn't be happy being someone's assistant.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Oh no no no no, I'd love to be somebody's assistant!Answering phones, getting coffee, I live for that stuff! And I'm nottoo mature... farts, boobies, butt cracks!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Steve	 Chandler, you were the strongest person in the program.We're offering you the position of junior copywriter.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Me, that guy who just said butt cracks?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Steve	 Yes, that's right. We're excited about the level ofsophistication you'll be bringing to the job.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Ok well, thanks, you won't regret it. I'll see youtomorrow .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 What?  Oh, yeah, I'm gonna be a juniorcopywriter.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Everybody	  Oh my God, congratulations!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Oh sweetie, I'm so proud of you!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Does that mean I get the good loving tonight?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 You bet! No TV or anything! 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  Hey, that is so great about the job. 
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Thanks, man.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 And I like to think I had a little something to do withit.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Really? What?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Well, before, with the wishbone... I didn't wish wewould win the lottery, I wished you'd get the job.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	  Oh yeah?  Listen, don't tell Monica, she'll rip your heartright out.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Oh yeah.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 You know what? There is a little part of me thatreally thought we were gonna win.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Me too. So much for my dinosaur/Amelia Earhart themepark.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 You guys, what was the Powerball number again?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica, Ross	 Seven.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 We won.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 What?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 We won!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 Let me see!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 Don't tear it.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 Phoebe, you don't have any of the first five numbers.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 I know that, but look, we've got the Powerball number,we've won 3 dollars!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Wow, you'd think we should get that over 20 years orgo for the big payout.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	  I don't care, I've never wonanything before, I can't believe this!
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 So Pheebs, what are you going to do with your $3?
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 It's not all mine. We all get 50 cents.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Monica	 You know what? You can have mine.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Chandler	 Me too.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	 Me too.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Rachel	 Me too.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Ross	 I guess if everybody else is...
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Joey	  Hey guys, so I just called thePowerball hotline, can you believe it? Nobody won.
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	 I beg to differ .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Gunther	 Maybe nobody won the jackpot, but there was this guyin here earlier, and he found the ticket on the street, right outside,and won $10,000 .
09	18	0918	The One With The Lottery	Phoebe	  Coo, again. Don't blame the pretty lady. Itwas not her fault. It was me, the pigeon, coo!  Seriously, stopstaring at her.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Teleplay	 Mark Kunerth
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Story	 Dana Klein
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	  God, you're beautiful...why are we fighting this?You know you want it to happen as much as I do.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 I want you.I need you.Let me make love to you.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 I don't wanna stand in the way of true love or anything, but I think a cantaloupe might hurt less.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Oh, ehm...I'm...I'm rehearsing my lines.They gave me a big romantic story on Days Of Our Lives. It's the first time my character's got one. I'm so nervous, you know, I really want it to be good!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Woow!I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Yeah, that was a disappointment... Oh, hey!D'you want to come down to the set and tell me if I'm doing ok?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Are you serious?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Yeah!Hey, you just have to promise not to get yourself thrown out again.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Hey, that was an honest mistake!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Right!"Oh my God, is this the men's room? Oh, I feel so foolish, have you always known you wanted to be an actor?" 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Yeah, that was an awesome day!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Hi!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 So, do you guys wanna come and eat dinner at the restaurant sometime in the next few weeks?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Sure!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 I'd love to!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Well you can't! We're booked solid for the next month!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Well, I can't give you a massage, because my licence has been revoked again!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Phoebe, what happened?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Well, it was an accident...You know, it's a lot of oil and sometimes the hand just slips!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	  Have I got a surprise for you? Pack your bags!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Oh no!You guys aren't supposed to get divorced for 7 years!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 What? No, I'm taking Monica to a romantic inn in Vermont !
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Oh, good!Ok, good for you!Try to recapture the magic!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 So, what do you say? Can you get out of work?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Oh, honey!I can't. I was just telling these guys that things are crazy at the restaurant!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Are you really that busy?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Yeah, I'm sorry. I really am.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Oh, that's ok.I'll just try and reschedule.  "Hi, this is Chandler Bing. I made a reservation there and I need to change it  Oh, what do you mean it's not refundable? Can I just come some other time?  Oh, can't you make an exception?"
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Tell them I'm a chef in a big New York restaurant!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 And tell them that in 2 weeks I will once again be a masseuse in good standing!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	  "Look, this is ridiculous! I'm not paying for that room! Ok?"  "Oh, thank you very much!"  Yeah, I'm going to Vermont...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Oh, don't worry about it! Just use your travel insurance.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 I don't have travel insurance.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Well, this is what happens when people live on the edge!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Why don't you take Ross?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Uh, don't you think that would be a little weird? I mean, two guys in a romantic inn...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 No, not if their room has two beds!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  I guess...It still seems a little... moonlight boat ride!!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Hey Joey, is this the bed where Olivia lost her virginity?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 I don't know, but one of the extras sure did!  Hey, listen Rach. Thanks again for coming down to watch my scenes!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Oh, please!Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm...OH MY GOD!Is that Christian Sanders?He's so gorgeous!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Also so gay!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Oh, in my head he's done some pretty "not-gay-stuff"!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Well, at the Christmas party him and Santa did some definitely gay stuff!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Director	 Joey, Joey! We're ready for you!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Oh, wish me luck!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ok, not that you need it but good...GOD!Is that Chase Lassiter?He's straight, right?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Rach, I gotta say...if you weren't here wondering if these guys were gay I don't know if I could do this!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Oh, I'm sorry, you're right.I'm sorry, good luck! 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Director	 On a bell please! Quietly.. and ACTION!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 Drake! What are you doing in here?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Stopping you from marrying the wrong man and making the biggest mistake of your life.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 Get out!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 You don't love him!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 What do you know about love?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 I know what I felt that night when we kissed under the bridge.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 That kiss never happened.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Oh, what about this one.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  OH!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 No, I told you...get out!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Fine. I'll go. But let me ask you one question...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chase Lassiter	  You look familiar, have we...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 SSSHHHHTTT!!He's asking her a question!!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Can you really live the rest of your life never knowing what we could have been?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 I don't have a choice...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Yes, you do.Yes...you do. I'm the one who doesn't have a choice because I...because I can't stop loving you.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Actress, Olivia	 Don't say that...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 Tell me to stop, just...tell me to stop. 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Director	 CUT!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 NO!  Or, cut!You know, that's your call!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	1St Customer	 Everything was delicious!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Thank you!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	2Nd Customer	 It was. The duck in particular was superb.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Thank you! You haven't said anything...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	3Rd Customer	 Actually I do have one small complaint.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Oh..please!I-I welcome criticism.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	3Rd Customer	 The musician right outside the restaurant...it's kind of a mood-killer!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 What musician?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	  And there's a country called Argentinaaaa, it's a place I've never seeeeen. But I'm told for fifty pesos you can buy a human spleen. Humaaan spleeeeen. Olè!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 What are you doing here!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Well, you said that you had customers lined up in the street, so I am here to entertain!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Great!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Yeah! It really has been great too, you know, some of this people must have seen me play before because they were requesting a bunch of my songs! Yeah, "You suck" and "shut up and go home".
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Listen Phoebe...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Yeah.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 You know how much I love listening to your music, you know, but...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 But what?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 This is kind of a classy place.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	  Ok, say no more.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 : It wasn't just that she was fat, the woman smelled like garbage! Everyone! It wasn't just that she was fat the woman smelled like garbaaaaaage!  Classy, uh?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Hi, Chandler Bing, I have a reservation.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 Welcome to the Chestnut Inn Mr. Bing, so where are you joining from?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 New York.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  The big apple!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 I'm sorry, he's a little bit wound up, we had to stop at every maple candy stand on the way here.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Yeah, I ate all my gifts for everybody.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 I am sorry Mr. Bing, there's no record of your reservation in the computer.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Well, that's impossible, can you check again, please?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  Check again please!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 I'm sorry, it's not here.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Not there.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Let me get this straight. I called yesterday trying to cancel my reservation and I was told it was not refundable, then we drove six hours all the way up here and now you tell me that we don't have a reservation?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 I don't know what to say.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  She doesn't know what to say!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Just give us the cheapest room you have.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 Unfortunatly the only thing we have available is our deluxe suite, the rate is six hundred dollars.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 That's insane!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Totally insane. Dude, let's drive home, we'll hit all the maple candy stores on the way back and if...if they're closed maybe we'll tap a tree and make some ourselves.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Does that room have a closet I can lock him in?  We'll take it.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 Great.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	  What!? They are totally ripping us off!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Dude, don't worry 'bout it! I know how we can make your money back! This is a nice hotel, you know, plenty of amenities, we just load up on those! Like those apples. Instead of taking one, I'm... I take six!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Great, at a hundred dollars an apple, we're there!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 C'mon, you get the idea, ow-ow-ow we'll make our money back in no time!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Dude, you're shaking!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 I think it's the sugar, could you hold the apple?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Hi!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Joey, I gotta tell ya, I've been thinking all day about that scene you did, I mean, you were amazing!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Oh, you know, the writing was good, and the director is good, and... and my co-star's good but they're not as good as me!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 God, you have to tell me what happens tomorrow!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Ow, I'm just going over the script now! You wanna read lines with me?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Me? Oh, no, I am not an actress.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Oh, all right, I can ask Monica.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Oh screw her, that part is mine!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Right...  ok, so just from the top of the page, right here.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Okay. . Hello Drake, I'm surprised to see you here.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 I can't believe you married him.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel, Actress	 But what choice did I have. He was keeping my sister in a dungeon!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 So what about us? Everything we feel for each other.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel, Actress	 It's over! You have to accept that.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey, Drake	 How can I? Knowing I'll never hold you in my arms again, or touch your skin, or feel your lips, knowing I'll never make love to you? How can I accept that... I can never kiss you again when it's all I can do not to kiss you right now.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Kiss me.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 What?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Kiss me.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Ah, Rach, it doesn't say that!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 No, I'm saying...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 but, but..
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 just... don't talk... 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Ehhh, aw! . Well, that's new!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  Hi, this is Ross Geller in suite 206. It seems you forgot a couple of things. Could you have some complimentary toiletries sent up to my room?  Thank you! Ok. Toothbrush, toothpaste, razor, mouthwash, deodorant, dental floss, band aids, shaving cream, after shave... and I feel like I am forgetting something... Is there anything else you have that I haven't asked for already?  Yeah, go ahead, send up some tampons. 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 What did you get?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 USA Today
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Nice, put it with the others.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 And I also got... two more apples.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 We are four short of a bush-o . God I feel so alive, I love being in the country!  
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 I also got this great salt and pepper shaker from the restaurant.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Oh, that's not cool.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandlers	 Dude, none of this is cool.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 No, Chandler, you have to find the line between stealing and taking what the hotel owes you. For example: hair drier, no, no, no, but shampoo and conditioners, yes, yes, yes.  Now, the salt shaker is off-limits, but the salt  I wish I'd thought this through.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 I think I know what you mean though...the lamp is the hotel's, but the bulbs ...oh, you already got that.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Not my first time in a hotel, my friend.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Ok, how about this ?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 No, no, no, you can't take the remote control!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Yes, but the batteries...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Thank you, thank you very much!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Let's celebrate with some maple candy!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 No!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 At least tell me where you hid it.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Can I ask you a question?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Yeah.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Have you ever had any weird romantic dreams?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Let me think. Oh, when I was younger I used to dream that I got married to Mayor McCheese, and on our wedding night I ate his head.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ok, well this is like that...in no way. I had a...I had a dream last night that I wanted to kiss Joey.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Wow, do you mean like kiss him-kiss him?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Oh yeah! I mean, that was pretty intense.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 What do you think brought than on?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 I don't know! I mean, maybe that's something to do with the fact that I saw him do a love scene yesterday.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 A love scene? With who?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Olivia.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Olivia? I thought she was marrying Connor!  Oh right, real life more important.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 So do you think that my dream means anything?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 I don't know. I mean, you saw him do a love scene, so maybe you don't have a thing for Joey, maybe you have a thing for Drake.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ah! Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Of course it was! Trust me, when it comes to psychology I know what I'm talking about. I took two psych classes in college. 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 You took the same class twice.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 It was hard!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel, Monica	 Hi.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Here, Monica, look what I got to wear when I play at the restaurant  uh, huh wait!  Right? I mean, this might even class up the ballad of the uncircumcised man.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Oh...Phoebe? Maybe I wasn't clear before. I really love listening to your music here, but my restaurant is sort of an upscale place.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Right, yeah, ok, I'll ask the butler to fetch my diamonds out of the vault.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Phoebe, it's not what you wear. It's sort of your songs... I just don't think you should play at the restaurant anymore.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Oh, ok. Fine, I'll just, I'll take the hat back .
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 My songs aren't good enough for your restaurant?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ok, we're still on that.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 I didn't say your songs were not good enough.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Then what's wrong with them? Would they not go with your tiny portions of pretentious food?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Tiny portions?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Yeah well, "excuse me, I ordered the smoked salmon appetizer, but  I can't see it, I can't see it"!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Phoebe, it's not about quantity.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Well...it's not about quality.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Oh really, you want to talk about quality? Have you heard of a key? It's what some people sing in.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Well at least all my songs don't taste like garlic. Yeah, there are other ingredients Monica.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Ok, so that's what we're doing. You know, when I'm in the coffee house bopping along to one of your songs, I'm wearing ear plugs.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Ear plugs, or cloves of garlic?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 You know what? I take back what I said before. You keep playing at the restaurant, because with your music driving people inside, my bar sales are going up like crazy.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 What are people having, the garlic Martini?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Receptionist	 Here's your copy of the bill, we hope you enjoyed your stay.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Oh we did, and you still have all your lamps.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Oh, I didn't factor in the room tax.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Oh dude, don't worry about it, I found an unattended maid's car. We're way ahead of the game.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Oh my god.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 What?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 There's something new in the bowl.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Look, we have enough, just walk away.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 No, but I want...I want the pinecones!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 There's a forest right outside.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 It's not the same.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 Ok, go quick!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  Thank you for a delightful stay.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	 Oh, my maple candy!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	  Food here at 'Javu'..will kill you..the food here at 'Javu' ...will kill you..
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Thank god, it's just you! I thought someone was swinging a bag of cats against the wall.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 You'd better get back in that kitchen Monica, the garlic is not gonna overuse itself.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Ok, you have to stop playing now.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Why? The only person my playing is bothering is you!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Oh yeah? Ok, let's settle this, come on!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	  Get your garlic-peelers off me!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	  Excuse me, excuse me, hi, I'm Monica Geller..I'm the head chef here.. .. Ok, I was actually expecting a little applause there, but whatever! Ok, quick question: by a show of hands, how many of you were bothered by this woman's singing outside? 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Ok, ok, how many of you enjoyed the music outside?  Ha!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Alright, let me ask you this question: How many of you thought the music was fine, but not in keeping with the tone of the restaurant? .
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Ok, well, who identified the tone of this restaurant as pretentious comma garlicky?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Ok who thinks the food is delicious and a little pretention never hurt anyone? 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Ok, well, alright, who thinks the food is fine, the music was fine, but your evening was ruined by this incessant poll taking? .
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 Excuse us!  Alright here's a question: Who was so worried about her restaurant being fancy that she made a big deal about her friend playing her music and feels really bad about it now? 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Oh...Who was so stupid and stubborn that she lashed out against her friend's cooking which she actually thinks is pretty great! 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 I'm sorry...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 I'm sorry too... 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	 ooohh... hey! Wanna stick around and I'll whip you up some dinner? 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	 Yeah! As long as it's free! Food here is ridiculously over-p... 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Phoebe	  Who's hoping the hand raising thing is still cute enough that you won't hate me?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Hey!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	  Oh man! I thought I got it all!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  How...how...?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 I was making a peanut butter smoothy, right? 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 uh-huh
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 And I couldn't find this little plastic thing  that goes on top of the blender...and I thought...well... how important can that be, right...? Turns out very! 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Wow...definitely just Drake...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 What?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 What...how is it going with Drake?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Oh...I don't think it's going very well...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 What...that scene I saw was so good!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Well, I'm feeling really insecure about the one we are shooting tomorrow...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 A little. Yeah no, I really am worried, you know, I mean I have to make it convincing that I'm in love with Olivia.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 So?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 So...I've never played that!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ooh! Honey, it can't be that hard, I mean, you've been in love before?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Uh...well...just once...with you...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	 Ok...this could be a little awkward...I'm just going to blow past it... well can't you just use that method actor thing where you use your real life memories to help you in your performance?
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	  What the hell are you talking about??
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Alright, alright look, just uh... just try to remember how  you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	  Oh! ok, yeah, I think I can do that. Yeah ok, there's this party scene coming up.. and Olivia and her husband are there and all Drake wants to do is grab her and kiss her, but he can't... And that makes me think about all those times when I wanted to grab you and kiss you, but you didn't know so I would just pretend everything was cool, but really, it was killing me.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Rachel	  Joey, you never..you never talked about that before...
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	 Well.. hey, you know what else I could use? There's a scene where Drake sneaks into Olivia's bedroom, and she doesn't know he's there - which never happened with us! And he knows he shouldn't be there, but he just wants to look at her... you know?  And I remember all those mornings before you even put on your make-up, when I would think to myself, my God, she...is... beautiful...  and it hurts so much, cuz I knew I could never tell you  but it was worth it just to be there looking at you.
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Joey	  Thanks dude!!!This is GREAT!! 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Chandler	 I got you something from Vermont! 
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Monica	  Besides tampons and salt?  Ooh! My God! Maple candy! That's so sweet of you.  That's weird...it's empty!
09	19	0919	The One With Rachel's Dream	Ross	  Hi you guys! what's going on, you... you guys wanna hang out...or...?  do you...do you guys hear a buzzing?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Teleplay	 Andrew Reich & Ted Cohen Story: Shana Goldberg-Meehan Directed by: Sheldon Epps Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Hey, you guys, what are you doing tomorrow night?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	  Well, let me see... I-I believe I'm... yes, falling asleep in front of the TV.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Look, my agent hooked me up with six tickets to a great play.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 I could fall asleep at a play.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 What is it?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 It's a one-woman play called "Why don't you like me: a bitter woman's journey through life".
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 It sounds interesting!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Yeah, it does sound interesting, I mean, to listen to a woman complain for two hours, I don't think it gets bett... 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 I know, I know, we can drive, we can vote, we can work, what more do these broads want?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 You guys are gonna have a great time, I promise!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 What? How come that you don't have to go!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 I wish I could but I just found out that I have to be at work really early the next day, so I can't go, but, you know, take the extra ticket and invite whoever you want.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	  Uh, let's see, who do I hate?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Oh, sorry... Oops, sorry.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Hey, here you go.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ooh... oooh...   oh, ah...   Can I ask you a question?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Yeah.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Do you think it's possible for two friends to fool around and... and not have it be a big deal?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 No, I don't think it ever works. Why?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 No reason.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 No, no, Rachel?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Who do you wanna fool around with?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Nobody, forget it!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Maybe.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  You can't!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Why?  Seriously I did not understand a word that you said.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 In the hall.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 You wanna fool around with Joey?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah! You know, ever since I had that dream about him, and can't get it out of my head! And what's the big deal, people do it all the time!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Who? Who do you know that are friends that just fool around?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ok, off the top of my head... Don and Janet.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Who, who are they?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I know them from work.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Both of them?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 No, one of them...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Which one?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I don't know, what were the names I just said?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Rachel, things can get incredibly complicated.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we  Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 What the hell are you cooking!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Hey, you guys won't believe what I have to do for work today.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Yes, but, Ross you chose a career of talking about dinosaurs.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	   There're these two professors who are joining my department and I have to meet them here and show them around campus.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 What's so bad about that?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 It's I just know they're gonna be a couple of windbags wearing tweed jackets with suede elbow patches.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 : Ross?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  These aren't suede.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	  Excuse me, I'm looking for someone. You don't, by any chance, know a Ross Geller?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Gunther	 No.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Hi, hi, I'm Ross Geller.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Oh, hi. I'm professor Wealer.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, oh, that's, that's, that's nice.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 It's a... It's good to meet you! Thank you so much for taking the time out to show me around.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, no, it's no big deal, I mean, if I weren't doing this I'd just, you know, be at the gym working out.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Is he gonna introduce us?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	  No, I think we're just blurry shapes to him now.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 And, by the way, I really enjoyed your paper on the connection between geographic isolation and rapid mutagenesis.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, ha, I wrote that in one minute.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Twenty bucks says they're married within the month.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	   We should probably get going, you know, we got a lot of ground to cover.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Oh, ah, isn't there another professor that is supposed to come with us?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 I don't think so.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 I'm pretty sure, professor Spafford from Cornell?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, well he's obviously late and the rule in my class is "if you can't come on time, then don't come at all".  An option that many of my students use.  Shall we?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 You don't think we should wait for him?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 You know what, he's a big boy, I'm sure he'll find us, ok?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	 Professor Geller?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, damn it!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Jane	  Hi Joey it's Jane Rogers, can't wait for your party tonight. Listen, I forgot your address, can you give me a call? Thanks, bye.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 What's happenin'?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah, it's a real shame you can't make it to that one-woman show tonight.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Oh, I'd love to, but I gotta get up so early the next day and so, you know me, work comes first
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah... 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Message	 "Hi Joey, it's Jane Rogers can't wait for your party tonight" 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Stupid Jane Rogers!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  You are having a party tonight??
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Kinda have a... a thing for the Days Of Our Life's people.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 And you weren't going to tell us? How did you think you were gonna get away with that?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 I do it every year.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 You do that every year??
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 I didn't have to tell you that!! I'm stupider than Jane Rogers!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, that's why you got these tickets to that play, to get rid of us??
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Yeah...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 And last year is that why you sent us to that medieval times restaurant?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Yeah...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 OH! And the year before that, when you set up that nighttime tour of that button factory?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  I can't believe you guys went for that one!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Joey, why wouldn't you invite us to your parties?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 You're fine, ok? But everyone else acts like an idiot around famous people!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Well, then so you just invite me...!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Please, I was trying to be nice, you're the worst one!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, Joey, come on! Please, please! Let me come, I will behave, I promise! I will behave! Please, please, please...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Ok, ok! Fine! You can come, but don't tell anybody else. It's up on the roof at 8.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  OH, a soap opera roof party!! I'm going to a soap opera roof party!! Oh my God, oh my God!!  And it's out of my system!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	  And then my wife and I went on a cruise to the Galapagos. There was a sea food buffet you wouldn't believe. There were clams, and mussels, and oysters, and cracked crab, and snow crab, and king crab. It's a pity I'm allergic to shellfish.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  So, where did you get your undergraduate degree?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	 And that's not all I'm allergic to.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Oh, it's not over!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	 I'm also allergic to peanuts, and cashews, and almonds, and filberts...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 So basically all nuts?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	 Interestingly... no.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Kinda playing fast and loose with the word "interesting".
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Professor Spafford	 If you'll excuse me I'm going to use the restroom. 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Oh my God!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 I've lost the will to live.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Let's ditch him!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 What?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Come on, he's still in the bathroom! I'm begging you!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh... ok, fine. But... ehm... I just have one question for you, ehm...  When we exit should we walk, or run, or prance, or stroll...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Stop it, stop it! He talks slow but he might pee fast! Ok, let's go!! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Oh, hey you guys! This is Charlie! Charlie, this is Phoebe and my sister, Monica.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Hi!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Yeah, Charlie is gonna be joining my department.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Oh, you're a paleonthologist, too!  Oh, ok, now, what do you think of Ranion's new theory of species' variegation in segmented arthopods?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Well, I think he's a little out there, but he does have some interesting ideas...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Ah, ah.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	  Oh, I'm sorry. I'll take this. Excuse me. 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Ranion's theory of species variegation?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, I saw the article on your coffee table and I memorized the title to freak you out!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  So, did you two have fun?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh my God, she's great! I mean, we-we have so much in common and she's just cool, and funny...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 And I don't know if you've noticed but she's a  HOTTY!!  HI!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Hey... Hi you guys! Listen, you know what? I'm not feeling really well. I think I can't get out for the play.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Really? Wh-what's wrong?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I don't know! I think it's kind of serious! Oh, you know... I was watching this thing on TV this morning about... Newcastle disease... and I think I might have it!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Oh, Newcastle disease is a secretion borne virus that only affects chickens and... other poultry.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 ... Ok, who is this?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 I'm sorry, Rachel, this is Charlie Wealer, she's a collegue.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, hi! I would check your hand but... I'm sure you don't want to get my chicken disease!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Hey, Rachel, Can-can I see you for a sec?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Sure!  Oh...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 You're not sick!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 What? Yes, I am!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Ok, then, why are you...  all dressed up??
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 When you're sick, you do whatever you can to make yourself feel better! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 You just wanna stay home so you can make a move on Joey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, no, no! I heard you before, that is so not what this is!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Ok, what is this?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ok!  Joey is having a secret Days Of Our Lives party up on the roof and he sent you guys to the play to get rid of you!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  WHAT?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Wh-what's going on?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Joey is having a secret Days Of Our Lives party up on the roof!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 And he didn't want you guys to know about it but I came over here to tell you!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 I thought you came to say you were sick.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ok professor or detective?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Joey's having a party and he wasn't gonna invite us?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah, and he does it every year! That's why he's sending you to that play! That's why he sent us to that medieval restaurant and to that button factory!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 And that horrible museum tour!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 No, I arranged that...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Hey you guys, I'm turning in. Have fun.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 We know about your party Joey.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 What party?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 The game's over! Take off your robe!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Ok... I mean...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Everyone	 No!! Cover it up!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Nice to meet ya! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Hey! Hey alright! Hey, glad you could make it  Thanks for coming.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh my God! Kyle Lowder!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Kyle Lowder	  Hi. 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  I love you!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Hey, that's why I didn't invite you. you have to calm down, alright... go, go get yourself a drink or something...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh yeah that's what you want - my inhibitions lowered.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Oh my God, can you believe we are surrounded by all this? I can barely control myself.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Monica, you might want to remember that you are married. Where is Chandler anyway? 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Oh my God! Chandler!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Where the hell is everybody?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Bitter Lady	  Why don't you like me?! Chapter One: My first period.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Hey! Joey said no autographs! But if she's gettting one, then I want one too: To Monica. And none of this "best wishes" crap. I want "love".
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ok actually Mon, Matthew was just giving me his phone number.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh man! If I had known I was coming to this party I never would have gotten married!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Matthew Ashford	 It was nice to meet you Rachel.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Nice to meet you.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Matthew Ashford	 Call me.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Ok
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  We will!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	  Look at you with all the guys!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 I guess you have forgotten all about Joey?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Yeah, well, I guess I have forgotten about Joey and clearly you've forgotten about Chandler!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Please... Chandler is the love of my life... ... oooh leather pants! Have Mercy! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  So, eh... it's probably gonna be hard for you to leave Boston, huh?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Actually, I'm kinda happy to be leaving... I just broke up with someeone.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Ooh... so sad... Still, it can't be easy for you to leave Harvard? Especially after working alongside a Nobel Prize winner like Albert Wintermeyer?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Actually, Alby is the guy I broke up with.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 You... you dated Albert Wintermeyer?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Yeah...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 ... And you called him Alby!?  I mean that's like... like calling Albert Einstein... er... Alby...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Yeah, well, he is a brilliant man.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Eh, you think? I mean, you went out with a guy who improved the accuracy of radiocarbon dating by a factor of 10!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Yes! And while that is everything one looks for in a boyfriend, he had a lot of issues...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Oh! like what?!  Oh I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry... it's just that this must be what regular people experience when they watch "Access Hollywood".
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Ok, you want the dirt? Alby was seriously insecure. I mean, he was really intimidated by the guy I dated before him.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Who is intimidating to a guy who won the Nobel Prize?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 A guy who won two.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Two? Wha...? Don't tell me you dated Benjamin Hobart
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 Yeah... for three years.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh my God! Have you ever been in a relationship with someone who hasn't won the Nobel Prize?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 ... no... bu but there was my first boyfriend Billy.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh yeah? no, no Nobel Prizes for him?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Charlie	 No, but he did just win the McArthur genius grant.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Huh... huh... what a loser! Some more wine? 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Hey Ross!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rache	 How is it going with Charlie?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Oh Great! After I finish my wine I'm going to blow my... eh. average-sized brains out.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Oh, What's the matter?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 She... she only dates geniuses and Nobel Prize winners. Oh my God, at the chinese restaurant earlier today, I put chopsticks in my mouth and pretented to be a woolly mammoth.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I always loved that!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Of course you would, your brains are smaller than mine!!  Man, I can't compete with the guys she goes out with, they are so out of my league! oh my God!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Worse?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh much, much worse. I did my impression of Joan Rivers as one of the earliest amphibians...  "Can we walk"?  Oh, you... you like that?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	  No. 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 What? 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Come on! I think this is funny! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Bitter Lady	 Well, I bet you are all thinkin' "Now would be a really great time for an intermission", huh?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	  oh yes, God yes!!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Bitter Lady	  Well, you're not gonna get one! Because in life there are no intermissions, people. Chapter 7: Divorce is a 4 letter word.  How could he leave me?!?!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 I... I don't know... you seem lovely.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Hey Ross, this is one of my co-stars, Dirk.  Dirk, this is my good friend Ross. 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Nice to meet you.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Dirk	 Hey! So what show are you on?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, I'm no actor, I'm a professor of palaeontology.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 It's a science.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Dirk	 Oh! Hey well listen, I play a scientist on "Days". And my character has just won the Nobel prize.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Hey Ross, listen, Dirk was wondering about the woman that you brought and if you guys were together, or...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Oh, well no, but I mean, she only goes out with really, really smart guys.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Dirk	 Hey, I got a 690 on my SATs.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 I'd lead with that.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 That's it, just sign right on the bra .
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Monica!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Don't worry Joe, I won't come next year!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  What have you got there?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Just some boys gave me their phone numbers.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Ah, let me see!  Damn, that's a lot of guys! Are you a little slutty?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  I think I am.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Let me see if I approve any of these clowns. This guy wears a rug . This guy's Canadian . And this guy is in a cult, ok, and it costs you 5,000$ to get to level three and I don't feel any different.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	  Pass, pass, oh, pass, double-pass, pass...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Why, why, what's wrong with these guys?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Nothing major, it's just that, you know, they're not really good enough for you, and you deserve the best.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Joey, you're so sweet.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 That's true. But you know what, it doesn't matter because I already know who you're gonna go home with tonight.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Who ?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Me.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  What?  Really?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Yes, 'cause we live together, that's a joke!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh! Screw it, I didn't get it! 
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Joey	 Gotcha.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Oh, Very funny... Joey.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	  So, how did you enjoy the play?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh my god, honey, I'm so so so so so sorry.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Well you should be. You missed the most powerful three hours in the history of the theater.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 You really liked it?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Oh yeah! I mean at first I hated it, but why wouldn't I, because as a man I've been trained  not to listen!  But after chapter 16: "fat, single and ready to mingle", I was uplifted.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh really!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Oh yeah, I had no idea the amazing journey you go through as a woman! Tell me, tell me about your first period!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 No!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Did somebody sign your bra?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 So I got it when I was 13...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Hey Ross! So listen, about you and the dinosaur girl, are you really just gonna let a couple of Nobel prizes scare you off? What is that, come on, a piece of paper?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 It's actually a 1,000,000$ prize.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Go Charlie! But my point is, ok so she dated them but she also broke up with them. Maybe she's looking to, you know, slum it with some average Joe Phd.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Yeah, maybe. I do have my whole career in front of me. I mean, I can still win a Nobel prize. Although the last two papers I've written were widely discredited.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 You're so much more than just brains! You're sweet, and kind, and funny...
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 And sexy.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Ok well give her a chance to see all of that!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Yeah, you're right, thanks Pheebs, I'm gonna go find her.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Good for you! And hey, I thought your paper on punctuated equilibrium in the Devonian era was top notch!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 Stop going through my stuff !
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Hey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I just wanted to let you know I've changed my mind: I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna kiss Joey.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 No, you can't! Friends hooking up is a bad idea.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Please, what about you and Chandler?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 That's different! I was drunk and stupid!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 Well hello !
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 What about all the guys that you've got the phone numbers from? Why don't you just kiss one of them?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 I could, I could but I don't want to! I want to kiss Joey!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Alright . I think it's a big mistake but it's your decision.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	  I'm gonna do it.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 And I can't stop you.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Rachel	 No.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	  Hey Rach, have you seen Charlie anywhere?
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Ross	 I'm smarter than him!
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Phoebe	 Hey, thank you so much for these tickets, Chandler.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Oh well, this was a really important experience for me, and I wanted to share it with you.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Monica	 Oh, you're so wonderful.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Bitter Woman	 Why don't you like me! Chapter one: my first period.
09	20	0920	The One With The Soap Opera Party	Chandler	 Can't believe you guys bought that, enjoy your slow death .
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Teleplay	 Robert Carlock  Story: Scott Silveri  Directed by: Gary Halvorson  Transcribed by: Eleonora, Pheeboh, Sebastiano & Vanessa
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 It's so weird, how did Joey end up kissing Charlie last night?   I thought you'd end up kissing Charlie.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Hey, I thought I'd end up kissing Charlie too ok? But SURPRISE!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 I missed most of the party  Charlie's a girl, right?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yes, she is this new professor of my department that I did   not kiss.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 I don't know why Joey had to kiss her! I mean, of all the girls   at the party, GOD!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Why do you care so much?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Yes Rachel, why do you care so much?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! You know...   and I... want him to hook up with lots of women!  I just... All I'm saying   is... I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Oh, I don't know, they seem to have a shared interest in each   other's tonsils...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Wow, Joey and a professor! Can you imagine if they had kids   and if the kids got her intelligence and Joey's raw sexual magnetism... Oh,   those nerds will get laaaaaid!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 All right, so... Ross, you're ok with all this? I mean...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah, it's no big deal. I mean, I just met her and I'm fine with   it...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Oh, God. I forgot how hot she was!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	All	 Hi!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 I'm gonna get some more coffee.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Oh, you know what? I'll come with you!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  So, a professor, uh?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Yeah! She is cool, and she's so smart! Her mind is totally acrimonious   .  That's not   how she used it...?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	  I feel like I owe you an explanation. I don't   ordinarily go around kissing guys at parties. I'm... well, I'm kind of embarrassed.   I really hope you don't think less of me.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Uhm no! Think less of you! No, I don't think less of you. I mean,   you saw someone you liked and you kissed them. I mean, those people who like   someone and don't kiss them... those-those people are stupid, I hate those people.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 You know, actually I'm a little surprised to myself. I mean,   Joey is so different from the guys I usually date. I mean, they're all professors,   and intellectuals, and paleontologists mostly, you   know, very cerebral...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah, I know the type.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Hey, if you wanna grab a bite before work we'd better get acrimonious.   No? Am I getting close?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Hey you guys! Look what I just got. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh, OH! Wow, I love those! Where did you get them?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 I bought them off Ebay! They used to belong to the late Shania   Twain.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  Phoebe, Shania Twain is still alive!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Oh... then I overpaid. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Hey, what's this?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh, it's a gift certificate to this new SPA in SOHO.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Oh, you can't show Phoebe this! She hates those corporate massage   chains.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Ah, why, now I can't get a massage? There are so many things   that she disapproves of! I can't eat veal, I can't wear fur, I can't go hunting...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Do you wanna go hunting?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Well, I would like to have the option!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  What's up?  Hey, Rachel!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 No, you can't go there! You know how I feel about these "big   massage places"! They're putting people like me out of business!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 And she wants to go hunting, too!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Phoebe, come on, I don't wanna waste it! It would be like throwing   away a hundred bucks!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Ok, this is not about the MONEY, ok? It's about... it's   about corporate greed destroying our hearts and leaving us... the hollow shells.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 I don't care about any of that!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Well, do you care about friendship?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 I feel really strongly about this, Rachel. Please, don't use   this gift certificate. I'm asking you as a friend.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh, not as a friend, Phoebe!! Fine, I won't use it!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Promise?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 I promise.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Thank you. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 But I am going hunting!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	  Hey honey! I missed you today!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Oh, yeah?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Yeah.  What d'you wanna do tonight?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Oh, well... Maybe we could... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Ok, trying to turn me on by making a mess? Know your audience!   Besides, tomorrow we're doing those fertility tests and until then you need   to keep your tadpoles in the tank.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 We really need to take those tests?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Honey, we've been trying to have a baby for over a year. I think   it's a good idea to find out if everything's ok. Just a few routine tests.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 But I don't wanna do it in a cup!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 What is the big deal?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 It's weird! In a doctor's office?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 It's not ok to do it in a doctor's office but it is ok to do   it in a parked car behind a Taco Bell?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  I cannot believe Ross told you that!    And in my defense, it was a Wendy's!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Look, I don't wanna do this test either, but I really do think   it's a good idea!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Yeah, ok. I'm sure that doctor's office can't be worst than   on a class trip to the Hershey's factory!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	  OH!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Oh, yeah! RACHEL TALKS TOO!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  Who says that wine has to cost   more than milk!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Heeey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Hi!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Come on in, how are ya?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 I'm good!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Can I offer you a drink?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Please, I've been crazed all day! I had a meeting with   the Dean, and my syllabus for summer school is due and I'm writing the Foreword   for a friend's book...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Uh-oh. I hade a pretty hectic day at work too, today I had to   open a door and go  ohhhh!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 So I am just so excited to be   here. And I can't wait to start exploring the city!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Hey, if you need a tour guide... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Oh, you mean it? That would be so fun!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Yeah, definitely, definitely. Ok, what do you wanna see first?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Oh, well, we can go see the Chronos Quartet at the Avery Fisher   Hall.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  Ok!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 And there is a collection of Walt Whitman letters on display   at the public library.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 I know, yeah!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 And first, I have to see the MET!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ok, let me stop you right there. The Mets suck, ok? You wanna   see the Yankees.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 No, no, no, not the Mets, the MET, singular!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Which one, they all suck!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 The museum!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  I don't think so.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  Hi there!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	  Hello, welcome to Lavender Day Spa   SPA. How may I help you?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh, hi. I have a massage appointment under Rachel Green, and   here is my gift certificate.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 This has been torn up.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 And... taped back together.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Ok well, I'll call you as   soon as your massage therapist is ready.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Ok
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Have a seat through the glass doors.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  through the glass doors.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Through the glass doors.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Alright-y then.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Phoebe, your next client's in the waiting room.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Ok. Do we have to talk like that then they're not around?  Oh, no, no! Listen, is there someone   who can fill in for me?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Sorry, everyone is booked!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 But that woman can't know I work   here. She's a friend of mine and I made this big stink about how awful this   massage chains are.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Then why you work here?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 'Cause it's good money! But that doesn't change the fact that   this is an evil blood sucking corporate machine!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Well, I think this is a great place to work!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Ok, are they listening?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ross!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Hi!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 I need to talk to you about Charlie.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Oh, do you, do you really?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Yeah, I'm... I'm kind of having a little problem.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Look, if you don't know what the word "acrimonious"   means, just don't use it!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 No, look, you know Charlie, right? She's cool, she's funny, her   body is soo...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Get to the problem!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Yes. It's just that she's so much smarter than all the girls I've   ever dated! Combined! I don't want her to think I'm stupid!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Are you wearing two belts?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  EH, what do you know!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 You were saying you didn't want to seem stupid.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Right, right, right, well, she wants to go to all this cultural   places and I don't know how to talk about that stuff. You gotta help me out!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 You know, I really don't want to   get involved in you guy's relationship.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Please, c'mon, you're the smartest person I know and I really   like this girl, ok, I don't wanna lose her.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Fine.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Thanks.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok. Let's see. Oh, you should take her to the MET!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 The Metsss!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Oh, no! The MET! The Metropolitan Museum of Art.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  Oh, that's what she meant!  You know, if they're   gonna shorten it, they should call it the MUSE! You know, short for museum,   and avoid all the confusion!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah, most of it it's a place  packed with confused angry   baseball fans!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ok, all right, so I'll take her to the MET.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah, uh, uh, ok, there's this great rare bookstore   on Madison Avenue. You know what? She loves architecture,   you know what you should do? You should take a walk down fifth to the   Saint Patrick's Cathedral and there there's this great little pastry shop that   she'd love.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Geez, sounds like you should be going on this date!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 But I'm not! . You know what if you're in the mood for   Thai food...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Slow down, you go way too   fast. Ok? Just go back to the MET, ok?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 You got to tell me exactly what to do there.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok, when you walk in the museum, take the right, that's the antiquities   wing. Ancient Egypt, Mesopotamia, up to the Byzantine Empire.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! So, I walk in the door and make   the right 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 I have a weird feeling about this place.  How do I   know that they are not gonna secretly videotape me and put it all over the internet.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Because, honey, I mean this in the sweetest way possible, nobody   is gonna wanna watch that.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Nurse	 Mr. Bing?  Here you are! You'll go into that   room and deposit your specimen into the container.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Deposit my specimen? You know,   usually I have to call a  900 number for that kind   of talk. Thanks, got it.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Hey, honey, my test is down the hall, are you sure you're going   to be ok?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Yeah, I guess!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 I know this is embarrassing, but nobody cares! No one here even   knows you!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 OH MY GOD!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Oh, Come on!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Ah ahahahhahaa! How great is this!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Hey, we're probably fertile, let's go home!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Why are you here?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Well, Sid and I are trying again and we had trouble last time   because apparently we...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  No no no... I mean, why? why is   she here??
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Oh! Someone's a little cranky today cuz   they have to do it in a cup!  Oh! They gave you the kiddy size .
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 What!?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 This was fun! But I've got an invasive vaginal exam to get to!   
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 I'd love to stay, but I have eh...  got   a hot date... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Please... go!  Just let me know if you   need a hand!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  I think it just fell off. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Hello "ja", it's time   for your massage, ja! Put your face in the hole.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Wow, a Swedish massage from a real Swedish person. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Okay, then I'm Swedish...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 So, what's your name?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 It's a normal Swedish name... Ikea...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh... what an interesting name.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Ja!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 You know I... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Time for your scalp massage!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  Wow... I really love   your... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Is something wrong?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 No, it's just that uhm... it feels so good... Ikea...    Yeah, say hey, you'll know this, what's the capital of Sweden?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Uhm... Stockholm.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Damn! I wish I knew if that was right!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  Note the painterly   lines and subtle impasto on this canvas. Monet painted quickly and usually outdoors   as his elusive subject was light itself.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Now, do you have any idea what you just said?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  No, no, my mouth   says the words, my brain is thinking monster trucks!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok now, remember, when you get to the museum, Monet is not spelt   M-O-N-A-Y. I just... I wrote that out phonetically for you.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Phonetically? 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah, yeah that means... you know? We just... we don't have time   for this.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ok.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok, but you know what? I gotta say,   I'm really impressed that you were able to memorize all this so quickly!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ah! I'm an actor! I can memorize anything! Last week on "Days"   I had to say "Frontal temporal zygomatic craniotomy".
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Wow. What does that mean?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 No idea! But the guy I said it to dies in the next scene so I   guess it means "you're gonna get eaten by a bear".
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Ok! So let's move on to the Renaissance?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Ok, Caravaggio uses chiaroscuro here to highlight the anguish   of the central figure. Touch it, it's really bumpy! .
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Nah ah! Nah ah!  No no no! No ad-libbing   and dude, you can't touch the paintings.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Come on! you... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 No! 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  My specimen is in the   room and I just want to thank whoever knocked on the door while I was in there.   Really helped speed the process along!  Janice! You're not... gone?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Oh! Sid is still in his room. I don't allow porn at home so   this is like a vacation for him. So did you do it? Did you make your deposit?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Yeah! yeah... The hard part is over!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 That's not the hard part honey! The hard part is what comes   next, I mean aren't you worried about the results?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 I haven't... I haven't even thought about the results yet...   I just assumed that everything was gonna be ok.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Oh! Well, you know what? It probably is.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  Yeah, but what if it's not? What if there   is a reason why we can't have a baby?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 Oh, Chandler, look. You and Monica are meant to have children.   I am sure it's gonna be just fine.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  oh, oh, yeah, ok, thanks. I can't believe   I didn't even think of that. I guess I was just so worried about having to...   come here and do... 'that'...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Janice	 What, you can do it in the parking lot of a Taco Bell, but you   can't do it at a doctor's office?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  It was a "Wendy's!!   "
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  "Ipan Stripan, Glupi Glabi! " And that is   the Swedish National Anthem! Thank you for asking! 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Wow, Ikea... what a rich culture. Uhm, you know what? I have   a friend who is a masseuse.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Oh, Ja! Ja!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Yah! She's... uhm... not very good though... 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Uhu, uhu... and why do you think that is?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 I don't know... maybe it's because she has got such callousy   fingers from playing crummy guitar...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Or... maybe she has trouble loosening your knots because you're   such a high maintenance tight ass!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	  Phoebe!!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 You know it's me?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 For like a half an hour! Man, you can lie about Sweden!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 How can you come here?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 How could you not tell me you worked here?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 I don't have to tell you everything!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting   a free massage!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Tips not included.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Oh! Phoebe, why did you lie to me about working here?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Because I was ashamed ok? I sold out for the cash! And then   they give me benefits like medical, and dental, and a 401K. But you know...   you pay a price. Now I'm this Corporate stooge and punching a clock and Ugh!   paying taxes!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there   right now and quit! Be true to what you believe in! Honey, you have principles   and I so admire that! I don't have any!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 You know what? You are right. I am gonna quit. It's time   I took my life back!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Rachel	 Good for you Pheebs!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Ok.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Okay  If you guys have microphones in there too, I didn't mean any   of that. I love you.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Haha! Got ya! Die, die, die!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Respectfully, professor   R. Geller.  Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Hi!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Hey, how was the Met?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 The museum was amazing!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Yeah? Joey really knows his art, huh?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Not so much, no. He had clearly memorized all the stuff to   say, and some of it didn't even make any sense.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 What do you mean?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Well, for one, he was talking about paintings that were nowhere   around.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Wait a minute... when you guys walked   into the Met, did you go to the right?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 No, we went to the left.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Oh Joey, Joey! But still, I mean, it seems like   you guys are having a great time together.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Yeah, it's fun .
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 What?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Actually, you know, Joey is your friend, and you don't really   know me that well; it would be weird.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 What, I mean, a little, but no, what, go on.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Well... I'm just thinking that maybe he's not the right guy   to be with right now, maybe I should be with someone... I have more in common   with. You know what I mean?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	  Yeah. But you know what? I think you should give Joey   a chance. I mean, he's a great guy, and sure he doesn't know that much about   art but you know, you can always talk about that with someone else.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Yeah, I guess that's true.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 And if you think about it, I mean the reason he memorized all   that stuff is because he thought it was important to you. You   know, that's the kind of guy Joey is.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 He is very sweet. Plus he's hot!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 That was going to be my next argument.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Hey!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  You're ready?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Charlie	 Yeah, let's go.   Thanks   Ross.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	  Hey Ross! That art stuff worked, you hooked me   up.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Ross	 Glad I could help man.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Joey	 Although some of that stuff wasn't where you said it was gonna   be, but...  I made it work.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  It is not okay that I'm aroused by this now.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Hello? Oh hi, Doctor Connelly.  No, she's not here   but, you know, I can tell her. Should I be sitting down for this?  Oh.  Well, so what does that mean?    Ok. Ok, thank you. Thanks. 
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Hey sweetie.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Doctor Connelly just called.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 With good news?  Of course   it is not good news, you just said  "Doctor Connelly just called".   If it was good news you would have said  "Doctor Connelly just   called! " But so what is it? Is there a problem, uh? Is there a problem   with me or with you?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Actually it's both of us.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 What?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Apparently my sperm have low motility and you have an inhospitable   environment.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Oh... what does that mean?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 It means that my guys won't get off their barcaloungers   and you have a uterus that is prepared to kill the ones that do.  It   means...
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 Chandler?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	  It means that we can keep trying, but there's   a good chance this may never happen for us.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	  Oh my God!
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 I'm sorry.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	 I'm sorry too.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Chandler	 Well, we're gonna... we're gonna figure this out.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Monica	  I know.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Good morning Phoebe.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Good morning receptionist.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Receptionist	 Here's your schedule for the day. Your first client is   in room No. 1.
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	 Rachel Green?  Son of a bitch, she came back?
09	21	0921	The One With The Fertility Test	Phoebe	  Are you ready for   your Scottish massage? Put your face in the hole, lassy.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	  Oh! That feels sooo good!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Oh, lucky me! Coffee and a live sex show!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 I'm sorry, what?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh... Oh, I'm sorry! I'm not... I was just-I was just reading to Emma.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 From... Cosmo??
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah... It's... "climax your way to better skin".
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	  So, I have to go shopping today, which is my least favourite thing, I'm soo bad at picking out clothes!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 So you need someone who knows fashion, to tell you what looks good.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Not me, not me, not me, not me, not me!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Oh hey Rach!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Yeah...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Maybe you could take Charlie shopping.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh, well...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 I'm sure you have better things to do.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Are you kidding? Rachel loves to shop! And she has great taste! Yeah, she's the one who taught me, you don't wear white after labour day and that you always, always, always have to put on underwear when you're trying on clothes.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 If you have the time, I'd really appreciate the help.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Ok, uh-uh... Let's-Let's shop!!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	  Ok, you're gonna come back with some very classy clothes... ... and some slutty lingerie, SLUTTY!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  Ok, great! All right, bye!  Pain in the ass!!  That's off, right?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 What's the matter, Pheebs?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh... Mike's sister just invited me to a party tonight, he's gonna be there. And she was like "Oh, don't worry! I asked him. He's totally ok with seeing you!". So now I have to go so he'll think that I'm totally ok with seeing him!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Which you're not, because you've totally hung up on him!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Exactly!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 And you're gonna want him to eat his heart out so you're gonna have to look fabulous!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  I didn't even think about that!  Aaargh, sexual politics!!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Hey Pheebs, I'm-I'm taking Charlie shopping, why don't you come and I'll help you find something.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Ok, that'll be great!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Oh, ain't that nice? The three of you trying on slutty lingerie together.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 That's not what we're gonna do!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Why would you ruin it, who was that hurtin'?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Wow! Fortunately she has a very pretty face!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Oh, I so can't believe this! My uterus is an inhospitable environment? I was trying so hard to be a good hostess!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Oh, I can't believe my sperm have low motility because, let me tell you, when I was growing up they sure seem to be in a hurry to get places!!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Doctor Connelly	  Hi there.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Hi.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Hi.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Doctor Connelly	 I'm sorry there wasn't better news from your test last week but I wanted to talk to you about your options.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Ok.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Doctor Connelly	 Above all, even though your chances of conceiving through natural means aren't great, you never know! So, keep having sex on a regular basis.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Oh, DAMN IT!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Don't worry, after a while he'll tune it out.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Doctor Connelly	 Ok, given your situation, the options with the greatest chances for success would be surrogacy, or insemination using a sperm donor.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	  Ok.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Doctor Connelly	 And, of course, if you feel that neither of those is right for you, you can always adopt.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Is that a hint? Because we love you Doctor Connelly but we don't think we'd want you to be our child!  Wow, talking about an inhospitable environment!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Hi! Ok, you're ready to go pick up Phoebe and go shopping?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Oh, yeah! Let's do it!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	  Alright, have a good time. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Not gonna find any clothes in there!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	  Hey, you guys!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Hi.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Guess who's up for keynote speaker at the National Paleontology Conference?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Umh... Kurts Baley?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Yeah, right! What was last time he met a submission deadline for an abstract  Well, why are you laughing?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Just... seeing what it'd be like to be a paleontologist... it's fun, yeah!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 So you're up for keynote speaker! Who's making the decisions?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Professor Sherman, yeah. I've a meeting with him today.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 He's a pretty tough guy to impress.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Yeah, well... I think I know how to dazzle him.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh... you're not gonna do a magic trick, are ya?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Tsz... NO! .
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Hey guys!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Wait a minute, you guys. Oh, I wanna ask you something. I-I I may get to speak at this paleontology convention and if I do, I'd love for you guys to come and hear me.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 I think I can safely say that we all have family issues, work stuff and/or are sick.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 It's in Barbados.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 But you come first!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 I'm there!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 We'll see you, guys! 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Bye.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Bye, see ya. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Ok.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 All right, so. How did it go at the fertility clinic?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Not as much fun as last time. Apparently you only get porn if you're giving a sperm sample.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 So-so what did the doctor say?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Well... there's surrogacy, but Monica has dreamt her whole life of carrying a child, she has felt that watching a surrogate would be... too hard for her.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 So you're ruling out surrogacy?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Yeah.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 So, I don't have to learn what that means?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Aside from adoption the only other choice is insemination, so... we're talking about sperm donors.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Enough said, I'm there for you man. Where is she, upstairs?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  ah-ha!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 How do you feel about all this?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 I wish there was an easier way for us to have a child but I don't think there is one.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Come on Ross, be a good guy. Step up and do it!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	  What?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	  What? NO! I am not going to give them Ben!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 The data we are receiving from MRI scans and DNA testing of these fossils are - are staggering.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Prof. Sherman	 Mmm-mm.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	  I mean, we've been accepting Leakey's dates as a given, but if they're off by even a hundred thousand years or so then you can - you can just throw most of our assumptions, you know, right in the trash.  So-so what I am saying is - is is that  is that the repercussions could be huge! I mean, not just in palaeontology, but if-if you think about it, in evolutionary biology, uh, genetics, geology, uh, I mean, truly the mind boggles!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Oh, that's not what you want...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Shop Assistant	  Incentive For Men?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh, I'll take some of that.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Pheebs, that's for men!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 No, I know, this way when I go to the party later Mike will know I am over him cause I'm gonna smell like another guy.  Yeah.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Ok. Oh good, I'm dating a Russian cab driver. . Seriously does anyone buy this? I smell like beets!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	  So, you know what, I really like those jackets with the shoulder pads on them. Where do you think those would be?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 On Melanie Griffith in "Working girl". I think what you want is over here.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 See, I told you I needed someone! Oh, you know, by the way, as a "thank you", I would really love to take you out.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Really?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Yeah! Actually Joey and I are going to the movies tonight, wanna come?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh, I can't. Because I-I've seen them.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 You've seen all the movies...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Yeah! I'm a big fan! Of the movies, you know. Motion pictures. The Talkies!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  Hey Rach, will you come with me to a dressing room?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Sure!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Ok!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Wha, you know, maybe we can do something else!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 You know that depends on what it is! I've done a lot of stuff.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 So what were you doing out there, do you not like Charlie?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 She's ok, I just don't get a really good vibe from her!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Why?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 I don't know, you know, just the way she waltzed in here all smart, and tall! You know, and just swept Joey off his feet... I mean, nobody else has a chance!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Who else?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Anybody! You, me, you know, Monica's mom...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 You like Joey?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Shhhhh! Phoebe! All right, look. I have a little thing for him.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  Oh my God!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 It's just physical and I have it totally under control! Ok? It's just, when I see them together, sometimes I just get a little jealous!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Uh, wow! Isn't it ironic that he liked you and now you like him?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Oh, I get it!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh well, as long as it is under control, you know, you can't do anything about it, he's already dating her, and she is a nice person, that wouldn't be right.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 I know, I know, so it is just not a big deal.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Yeah.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 So can we keep this between us?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Sure!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Ok, great, because I gotta get out of here, the smell of beets is killing me!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Any chance Charlie has a deaf twin?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Hi honey!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Hey! Look I brought a friend for dinner, this is Zack, from work!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Oh, of course, it's so nice to see you again, Zack!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	  You too.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 You guys haven't actually met before, but, boy! You're both polite!  Go to have a seat Zack, and I'll get you a beer.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 I got it.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Thanks.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  So, Zack's pretty nice, uh?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Yeah, I guess.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 So, how would you like to have a baby that's half yours and half his!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	  Excuse me?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Well, we're talking about sperm donors and Zack may be the guy! I mean, look, he's intelligent, he's healthy, he's athletic, I mean, he is "spermtastic"!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Chandler, this is crazy! What did you even say to him! "Come up, meet my wife! Give us your sperm"!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 No, I invited him to dinner so you could get a chance to get to know him! I mean, if we go through a sperm bank you never meet the guy, get to check him out.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Chandler!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 I'm telling you, he's great! I mean, even if my sperm worked fine, I'd think he'd be the way to go!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 I'm not going to be a part of this! You can't just bring some random guy at home and expect him to be our sperm donor!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Ok!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Uh!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Zack!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Thanks! Do you have a coaster? I don't wanna make a ring.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Tell me about yourself, Zack!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh, God, do you think she heard? It would be so bad if she heard!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Well, maybe she didn't hear! Ok I'm gonna go into that dressing room, you stay in here and I'll talk and see if you can hear me.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Ok, great!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  I didn't say anything yet!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Well, get back in there and talk!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  I'm Rachel. It's so annoying when I put Emma on the phone to talk with my friends.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  What!?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  Well, some things are just hard to say to your face.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Ok well, I heard that! Which means that she heard it too!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Ooh! We have a problem.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh! What are we gonna do?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Stranger	 Just be honest with her.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh my God!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Stranger	 And it is annoying when parents put their baby on the phone...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Alright! Enough out of you!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Hello?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Joey! Hey, I need to talk to Charlie. Is she there?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 No. no... eh... she went shopping with Rachel. Why? What's up?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 I'm meeting with professor Sherman about my being the keynote speaker...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Oh! How's it going?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 It could be better! He, uhm... he fell asleep!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 What!? But I already bought my ticket to Bermuda!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 Barbados.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Fine, I'll rent a car and drive...! Ross, you have to get that job!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 What am I supposed to do? He's out cold! In fact he was just talking in his sleep before and evidently he wants someone named Fran to spank him harder.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Well, just wake him up!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	 I can't! If he realizes that I'm the one that put him to sleep, I won't get the job!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Uh! That's a tough one. Oh! Wait a minute, this happened to me before! Yeah, I was auditioning for a play and the producer fell asleep and...  no wait a minute... it was me who fell asleep... Yeah I mean hey, Shakespeare, how about a chase scene once in a while!?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Hey guys! Dinner's ready!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Oh! I'm gonna go wash up first.  Thanks!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 So what do you think? I want that guys genes for my kid! Those eyes, those cheeckbones!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Ok, there's enthusiastic and there's just plain gay!!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 You don't like him.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 I think he is fine! It's just that we don't know anything real about him... we should get more information.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Alright! Just follow my lead!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 You guys have such a great place here.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Oh! Thanks, I'm crazy about our place. Hey! speaking of crazy... do you have a history of mental illness in the family?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Uhm... no. Although I did have an uncle who voted for Dukakis.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  That's really not the kind of thing we are looking for Zack.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	  Okaaay... so eh... so tell me, how did you guys meet.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Oh, friends first, drunk in London, you know the story. I've got a better question for you: Do you or any of your blood relatives have diabetes?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	  No...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Eh... Heart Disease, Alzheimers, gout?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 You guys don't have people for dinner a lot, huh?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 We're just making conversation. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Ok. I heard a joke today. It's pretty funny...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 You know what's not funny? Male Pattern Baldness 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Ok listen, you guys have shown a lot of interest in me tonight and I'm flattered and... and quite frankly a little frightened. Can we just talk about something else?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica, Chandler	 Sure! Alright...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Ravioli's delicious!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 I noticed you were enjoying that Ravioli with a beautiful set of teeth. Did you have braces as a child?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 No I didn't.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Yess!! 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  We're teeth people Zack!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Alright! Let's just do it. Let's just go over there and see if she heard.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Good plan.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Ok.  Wha...? where? Where are you going?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh! I'm sorry Rachel, I don't have time for your childish games, ok? I still have to go find something incredible to wear so I can beat Mike at "who's more over who"! 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Hey, hi! Hey, where've you been?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Oh! trying on clothes.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Oh! Wi... in the dres... in the dressing room!? Well, that's so weird! Phoebe and I were just trying on clothes in the dressing room. God it's just such a small world!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	  Rachel... I heard you guys whispering.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Oh God. You did. You heard. Ok, listen, let me explain.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 No! There's nothing to explain. I heard you. Phoebe likes Joey.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Yeah.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 It's just that... I don't understand it... I mean, Phoebe likes Joey and then she comes here to buy a dress to impress another guy...?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Yeah! That's Phoebe. That's Phoebe. You know, she just wants them all! It's like she's a nympho!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Wow!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 Yeah...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 You know, by the way. I heard you tell her not to do anything. Thanks for sticking up for me. You are such a nice person.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  I try...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Ross	  Oh my God! You really want me to be the keynote speaker? Thank you! 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Prof. Sherman	  You're welcome. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	  Wow! You look... ... stop-eating hot! Which is like the highest level of hotness!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Are you sure? Because I'm really dreading going to this party.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Then don't go!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Mike knows I'm coming, and if I don't show up he'll think it's because of him! And I don't want to lose face! That's a very serious thing in my culture.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Joey	 Alright, then you go to that party and you pretend to be over Mike. And afterward you come to my place and I'll get you good and drunk!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 You got it! Ok. But not on the wine that you made, ok, because I just don't want to go back to the Emergency Room.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 David?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Phoebe! Hi!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh my God! 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Wow, you look unbelievable.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Yeah. What-what are you doing here?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Well, I'm back from Minsk... permanently.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 What happened?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Well, remember how I was trying to achieve the positronic distillation of subatomic particles?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Yeah?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Well, after eight years of research I discovered that it can't be done.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Well, it's great that you're back! How are you?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Good, good, life is good...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Good!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Ah well, I-I'm seeing someone.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	  Oh, good for you.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 She's also a scientist, so she's very smart and pretty and... well, it's actually because of you, really, that we're together, I mean, I saw what you had with that Mike guy, and I just said "Boy, I want that".
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Mike and I broke up.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 You're kidding me. Because I'm not seeing anybody, I've just totally made that up.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Really?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Yeah, I don't know why, I'm sorry, I guess I just didn't want to lose face.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 I understand. Yeah. Ok so then ok, so we're both living in New York, not seeing anyone. That's so not like us!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Yeah, I know. Well... this is probably a stupid question, seeing that you look like that, but do you have some place that you need to be right now?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Well...  no.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Do you wanna get a drink?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 I'd love to.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Great.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Ok. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	David	 Do you smell beets?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Phoebe	 Oh, got it, stay upwind of me.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 Hey, there's Phoebe! Is that Mike she's with?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	 No, that's David.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Charlie	 There's a third guy?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Rachel	  Tip of the iceberg.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 I'm gonna take off now. You're gonna let me go home, aren't you?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 You sure you don't wanna stick around a little longer?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 No, no, I should get home, I'm kinda tired.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Are you just tired now or are you always tired, 'cause that could be a sign of clinical depression.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 No it's just tiring having to figure out the age at which all my grandparents died. I'll see you tomorrow.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Ok.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 I think we've found our sperm!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Does seem pretty perfect.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Yeah, you think so, well? Should I ask him?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	  No.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Why not, just because his great-grandmother was obese, our kids are gonna get that from you anyway!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 No, that's not it. It's just that when we were asking him all those questions before, I just... I just realized I don't care if he's the most perfect guy in the world... he's not you.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Yeah, he's better!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 No, he's not. And if I can't get pregnant with you, then I don't want to get pregnant by... him or anyone else.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Really? Are you sure?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Yeah, I'm sure.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Thank God, because I don't wanna do this either. You know, I was just doing because I thought that was what you wanted to do. You know, I'm the husband, I'm supposed to... bring the sperm.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 That is so sweet. I love you. 
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 So you know this leaves us with...
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 Adoption.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 How do you feel about that?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 I think I feel ok about it. Actually I think I feel really good about it.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Me too. I wanna find a baby that needs a home and I wanna raise it with you. And I wanna mess it up in our own specific way.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 So this is it, we're really gonna adopt?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	  Yeah.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	  Oh my God, we're gonna be parents!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 We are gonna be great parents.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Monica	 And it could be soon. I mean, think about it: right now, somewhere out there  our baby could be being conceived.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Wait, if we're lucky, and we're really really really quiet, we may be able to hear the sound of a condom breaking!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Hey, Zack!
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	  Hey Chandler.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Look, I just wanted to apologize for last night. I got the feeling we made you a little uncomfortable.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 No you didn't.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 Really?
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 No you did.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 My wife and I have some boundary issues, you know, sometimes we ask inappropriate questions. We're working on it.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Jeanette	  Here are the boards for Friday's pitch .
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Zack	 Oh, thank you.
09	22	0922	The One With The Donor	Chandler	 You wouldn't know if Jeanette's planning on keeping her baby, would ya?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey! I'm all packed and ready to go!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, that's right!  Daddy and uncle Joey are going on a trip today. We're going to a conference in Barbados, right?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Mmh-mmh.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Can you say Barbados?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Barbados!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ok, I gotta say. I mean, it means so much to me that you guys are coming all the way over there to hear me do my speech! UH! And I've a surprise, uh... I had to pull some strings but I was able to get everyone passes to the entire conference! That's right!  This babies will get you into all the paleontology lectures and seminars.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Do you have anything that would... get us out of them?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah Ross, I mean... we're excited to hear the speech but the rest of the time we're gonna wanna do, you know, "island's stuff".
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I think David would probably wanna hear a few lectures.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, right, because he's a scientist!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No, no, because, you know, he's been in Minsk for 8 years and if he gets too much direct sunlight, he'll die.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ok, we gotta go, yeah? So, we'll see you guys tomorrow.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 All right, let's do it! 5 hour flight with Charlie, have a couple of drinks, get under that blanket and do what comes naturally.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 It's a blanket Joe, not a cloak of invisibility!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Wow! This place is beautiful!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Look at all these paleontologists!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know, there are gonna be some pasty folks by the pool tomorrow! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 Oh my God, I can't believe you're here!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  I think I've been recognized, this happens all the time!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 Doctor Geller, I'm such a huge fan!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 That... never happens...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 I've been following your career for years, I-I can't wait for your keynote speech.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wow! This is very flattering, uh...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 I would love your autograph. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh, uh... Sure! Uhm... "Dear..." 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 Sarah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 "... Sarah. I dig you", Uh? "Doctor Ross Geller".
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Sarah	 Thank you so much!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, oh and Sarah... I'd like to introduce you to my colleague, uh, Professor Wheeler, a-and this is Joey Tribbiani.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Sarah	  Are you a paleontologist?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, God, no! No! No no, I'm an actor. You'd probably recognize me from a little show called "The Days of Our Lives".
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Dude, it's just "Days of Our Lives"... there's no the.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ok, Ross! It's... It's fun, yeah! No, I-I play Doctor Drake Ramoray.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Sarah	 I'm sorry, I don't own a TV.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 You don't own a TV? What's all your furniture pointed at??
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 David, can you help me?! I'm trying to explain to Chandler how a plane stays in the air.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Oh, certainly. That's a combination of Bernoulli's principle and Newton's third law of motion.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  See?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Yeah, that's the same as "it has something to do with wind".
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Alright, I'm gonna go pick up a few things for the trip.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, I should go, too. Oh, now... tomorrow do you guys wanna share a cab to the airport or should Mike and I just meet you there.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Mike?? Who's Mike?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Mike is your ex... uh... boyfriend!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 That's right! Oh, yeah... Well, I've totally forgotten about im! AH! That's-That's... a blast from the past!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 It's ok. Ho-honest mistake.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Really, it doesn't mean anything. I mean, you know, Monica refers to Chandler as Richard all the time!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  She does?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Let's get you out of here!! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 At least you took me down with you!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I'm sooo sorry!! I just... I keep thinking about Mike! I'm crazy about David, and we're having so much fun together. Why-Why do I miss Mike? That's-that's gonna go away, right?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I guess, in time.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I mean, my feelings for Richard are certainly gone.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You just did it again. Chandler, your feelings for Chandler are certainly gone!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	  Well, Phoebe's still pretty hung up on that Mike, uh?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I wouldn't read too much into it.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Still you know, a girl calls you by your ex-boyfriend's name, that-that's not a good thing, right?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 David, let me stop you there 'cause I think I see where this is going. I'm not very good at giving advice. So if you want advice, go to Ross, Monica, or... Joey, if the thing you wanna advice about is pizza toppings or burning sensation when you pee.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Sorry, I just... I wish there was something I could do, you know? Well, you know Phoebe...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Seriously, we're gonna do this?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 I'm sorry, uh... I just wish I could make her forget about Mike already, you know... Why did Phoebe and Mike break up?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, because his penis was too big.  Oh, I'm sorry, that's the kind of thing I do.  They broke up because Mike didn't want to get married. Hey, what if you just let Phoebe know you'd be open to marriage?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 That's great! That's great! I-I'll propose to her!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Well, I was probably going to do it at some point.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I didn't mean now...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Why not? It's brilliant!  Goodbye Mike, we'll see you at the wedding, fella!  well, we probably won't invite you to the wedding...  Thank you, Chandler. Sincerely.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, you're welcome! Glad I could help.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	  How do you think I should propose?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 David, I'm pretending to read here!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! How you doin'? Yeah alright!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, hey! You said you're gonna wear a thong, where's the thong?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	  I didn't mean a thong... I meant thongs...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 You really should have been more clear about that!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  You're never going to guess who I just saw downstairs!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh! ah! eh... Britney Spears!?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, she never misses these conferences!  No, I just saw Dr. Kenneth Schwartz!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh my God! Did you talk to him?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah... what am I going to say to Kenneth Schwartz?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 You could say: "Hey Kenny, how come you're not Britney Spears?" 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Ready to go?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Yeah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Wha...? You're gonna go now? I thought we could hang out?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh I can't... I have seminars all day and I promised Ross I would look at his speech.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 But maybe we can have dinner later? On the balcony? Will be romantic.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Will you wear a thong?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I will if you will.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh... you got yourself a very weird deal!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  I'm good, I have dinner plans .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 So you'll be ok?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, yeah. I've got tons of stuff I could do. I'm gonna hit the beach, go swimming...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Uh, Joe, have you looked outside?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, why?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh man!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 There's an indoor pool, you can swim there! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I wasn't gonna swim, I was gonna dig a hole! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Wow! That Mike thing was interesting! I don't know what's gonna happen with Phoebe and David.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  I do! Want a hint? huh? "I do"  "I do".
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok, I'm sensing that this is some kind of word play, because you are pink with barely controlled glee.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 David is going to propose to Phoebe.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?  Why?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Be-cause, we were talking about ways that he could beat Mike and I told him that Phoebe wanted to get married.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Chandler, we have talked about this. You are not supposed to give people advice! Now couldn't you just have made some sort of inappropriate joke?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I did! A penis one! Look, just so I know, what was so wrong about what I said?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 They've only been going out for a few weeks and Phoebe is completely hung up on Mike! She'll say "No", David's heart will be broken, it will be too hard for them to recover from and then Phoebe will end up alone again.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Man, that's some bad advice!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh! Hey! Thank God you guys are here!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Hey! Hey what's going on?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Everything is upside down here! It rains all day long, nobody watches tv and Ross is famous!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Alright, I don't wanna alarm anybody, but Monica's hair is twice as big as it was when we landed!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok! When I go places with high humidity, it gets a little extra body, ok?!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's why our honeymoon photos look like me and Diana Ross!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Come on, I'll show you guys where to check in 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Oh, honey, can you make sure we get a King size bed!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh! David, get one for us too! Oh, oh, and see if they have a heart-shaped one! And with mirrors on the ceiling!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  And make sure our room isn't next to theirs .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ooh! You guys are so lucky you are here with people, you known it's such a romantic place. That's all, I just wish I could  share that with a guy.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Not Joey.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Not Joey, no, I was just lusting after Chandler.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah, right!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 So, ehm... I'm proposing to Pheobe tonight. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Tonight?!  Isn't an engagement ring supposed to have a diamond?  Oh, there it is!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Yeah, well, being a failed scientist doesn't pay quite as well as you might think. That's uhm... one seventieth of a karat. And the clarity is uhm... is quite poor.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Nice! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Monica, can I talk to you for a sec? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 David is going to propose to Phoebe tonight!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 See what happens when you give people advice? I hope you told him not to?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That would be advice!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok fine. I'll handle this.  Phoebe?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  I need to talk to you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Are you leaving "The Supremes"? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok, my husband just gave your boyfriend some very bad advice. Look, David is going to propose to you tonight.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Wow? Really? That's fantastic!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 What are you serious? You wanna marry him? Wha... What about Mike?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh, ok, you want me to marry Mike? Alright, well, let's just gag him and handcuff him and force him down the aisle. I can just see it: "Mike, do you take Phoebe..."  You know, it's every girl's dream!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Do you really think marrying someone else is the right answer?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure! Look, ok, bottom line: I love Mike... David! David. I love David. Don't look at me that way, Roseanne Rosannadanna!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 By using CT scans and computer imaging we can in a very real way, bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 It's great. You're gonna be the hit of the conference.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh and you know what, it will be even better tomorrow, because I won't be constantly interrupted by Joey checking to see if they put chocolates on my pillow yet. .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey guys!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 The chocolates aren't here yet.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Damnit!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Ross just read me his speech. It's fantastic!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, is it on the computer, cuz I'd love to give it a read...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 If you want to check your email, just ask! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  What?  May I?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  What's with the rain, Geller? I mean, when I signed up for Dino Week, nobody said anything about it being monsoon season.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Actually the wet season is June to December.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 It's not the time Charlie.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Oh, no, no, no dear God, no!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh what, did someone outbid you for the teapot?  Oh! Secret teapot?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Your computer, I don't know wha... everything's gone!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wha... what do you mean? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 It must be a virus. I think it erased your hard drive.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 What, oh my God. What did you do?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Someone I don't know sent me an e-mail and I opened it.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Why, why would you open it?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, it didn't say "This is a virus"!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 What did it say?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Nude... ... pictures of Anna Kournikova. I'm so sorry.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 What... what am I gonna do? My speech is gone, Chandler!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 It's not gone! I mean, I'm sure you printed out a copy. You have a hard copy, right?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 NO! I don't!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, you must be pretty mad at yourself right now...!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 It's really gone?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yep! I'd like to thank you guys for coming down here to complain about the rain and ruin my career!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I just feel awful.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, well you should! I mean, nude pictures of Anna Kournikova? I mean, she's never even won a major tournament!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Well, I tried Billy Jean King, but...  you know, you and Monica have the same "I'm gonna kill you" look...? I can usually make it go away by kissing her... 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Get out! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You know, this happens all the time to my computer at work.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Well, what do you do?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I usually go... play Tetris on somebody else's computer.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I can't believe this. I can't believe this is happening. I have to give the keynote speech tomorrow! Ok? I have to stand up in front of all these people. What am I gonna say?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I could teach you a speech that I memorized for auditions.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I don't think that your monologue from Star Wars is gonna help me right now, Joe!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Ross, we can solve this. I just heard your speech. We can recreate it! We've got all night!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Wha... what you really think we can do that?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh wait, Joey and I are supposed to have dinner .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey don't worry about that! I mean, Ross needs you! And Rachel and I will stay and help anyway we can.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ugh.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Alright, ok, let's do it.  Uhm, I know we start by discussing the shortcomings of carbon dating... uhm, and then, then I move on to what is clearly the defining moment of the Mesozoic era, the breakup of Pangea, hello!  And then, there's the... eh... there's the overview of the Triassic.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, oh! Any chance any of this happened in a "Galaxy far, far away"? .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Hello?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok, Mike, enough is enough, now you love Phoebe and she loves you, so you need to get over your whole "I never want to get married" thing and step up!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Who is this?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 This is Monica! I'm Phoebe's friend. Listen, Phoebe is back with David and he's going to propose to her, and she is going to say "yes" but I know she really wants to be with you!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	  He... he's gonna propose?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I... I'm sorry, did you say something? I can't hear through all this damned hair! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Look, if Phoebe wants to marry David, she should, I'm not gonna stand in the way of that and neither should you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 You don't tell me what to do! I tell you what to do! Just call her. She's at the Paradise Hotel in Barbados. And while I've got you, you've got curly hair. What do you do in humidity?  Damnit!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Well, I hope you're happy!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Oooh! I hope you're happy too, honey!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Phoebe is going to say "Yes" to David. See, that's what happens when you meddle in people's lives!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Phoebe is going to say "yes"? That's, that's great!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 No it's not, b'cause she's still in love with Mike!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And there's not chance that will work?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 No, I called him. It's not gonna happen.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Oooooooh! Meddler! Meddler!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Well, if you hadn't meddled to start with, I wouldn't have had to go in there and meddle myself. Now, no matter how much we meddle, we will never be able to un-meddle the thing that you meddled up - in the first place!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 This vacation sucks!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I'm so bored! Stupid rain, we... we can't do anything.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, I've brought some books. We could read.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey, it hasn't come to that yet.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey hey hey! Don't mind if I do!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Waiter	 I'm sorry sir, these are for the pharmaceutical convention 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey Rach, do you feel like going to a convention?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 We can't. We're not pharmacists!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  I know we're not, but  Frank Medeio and...  Eva Trorro... womba...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Kate Miller?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Kate Miller it is. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 And... that's the most sex I'm gonna have this weekend.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 In that case should I make sure it's on real good? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Thank you. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 And then, and then you said that thing about, about bringing the Mesozoic era in the 21st century.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah, that's it?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God, we did it! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Actually I did it Ross. You remembered shockingly little of your own speech.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes, but I did make a pyramid out of the bath products. This is amazing, thank you, thank you so much.  That's a pretty necklace.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Thank you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey, what do you say we celebrate? Champagne? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh yeah! Hey, save the cork and then we can fill the bottle with water and put it back so they don't charge you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God, I love you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh, this is such a cute picture of Emma. And is this your son... or just some kid whose picture you bring on vacation?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 That's Ben, my son from my first marriage.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Your first marriage?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 You're married more than once?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 No. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 So, why did you break up?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Oh, it was... it's complicated, you know? She... she was... eh... gay.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh my God, this is so cool!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ok, odd thing to get excited about!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 No, it's just... I was enganged to a guy who turned out to be gay!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey! High-five! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Didn't you feel so stupid that you didn't see the signs? My fiancé was always going away on these long weekends with his tennis partner.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 My wife had a workout friend she went to the gym with everyday for a year. She didn't get any fitter.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Right and then everybody finds out and they're like: "Oh, I knew all along"
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I know! It's like, if you knew, why didn't you tell me, you know? I mean, call, or leave a note: "Hi, I just dropped by to say your wife's gay"
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I know!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 And then, you try to make the best of a bad situation, so you float the idea of a threesome?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I didn't do that.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Me neither.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Well, who knew? Pharmacists are fun.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Not enough pills in the world, Rach. What about you, you're the single one, seen anybody in there you like?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Well, let's see. There was a really big guy that I was talking to, with the really nice breasts...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 But what about back home, anything going on there? Anybody you like?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  No.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 There it is, you're blushing!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, I'm not blushing, I'm sunburnt! From, you know, the rain.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 You like someone. Tell me who it is. Who is it? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Tell me who it is.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Joey! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Come on who? Who do you like? Tell me. You're not getting away that easy. Who do you like, who?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Joey, come on! It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 What? Why not? Rach, who can you not get?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh!  Ok. Ok, you really wanna know who it is?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Yeah, who is that?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Do ya?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross, Charlie	 Hey!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	  I just left you a message! Ross and I were gonna go grab a bite, but now that you're here, maybe we can go have that dinner.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Right, of course. Hey, did you guys finish the speech?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yep, we got it, we got it.  Thank you so much.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I had a great time.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Alright, hey look, and this isn't over, because I really wanna know who...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Later! La...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 So, shall we?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ok. See you, bye.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Bye.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Good night.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Night.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross, Rachel	 Ok, good night!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't believe she's gonna say yes to David. She's clearly in love with Mike.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You know, it's very hard to take you seriously when you look like that.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Uh, Phoebe, uh, I have... something I wanna say.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God, he's gonna do it now. Please, I cannot watch this, let's go.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I think we have some time. Have you ever heard him talk?  "Uh, Phoebe, uh, I would be honoured, uh..." Spit it out, David!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Uh, Phoebe, uh...  you're an amazing woman, and the time we spent apart was, was unbearable. Of course the sanitation strikes in Minsk didn't help!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Sure, ok, yeah.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 But well, now that we're together again, I don't ever want to be apart. So, to that end...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Oh my God, Mike!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 It's David, actually!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No, Mike's here.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	  Hi Mike!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Hi David. Chandler. Monica...  Oh!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 IT'S THE HUMIDITY!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Hi Phoebe.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 What are you, what are you doing here?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 I have a question I need to ask you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 I have a question I was kinda gonna ask her myself.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Yeah, I understand, but before you do, she really needs to hear this.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	  Ok, would you care for my seat as well?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Actually yeah, that'll be great.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 That's fair, you've had a long trip. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Phoebe, I love you. I mean, I missed you so much these last few months and I thought we were apart for a good reason, but then I suddenly realized that there was no reason good enough to keep me from spending the rest of my life with you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Kinda stepped on the toes of what I was going to say.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Sorry David, but she really has to know this.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Alright, but after this I want to see you outside. If the rain stops.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 You're the most incredible woman I've ever met. How can I lose you?  Now, I don't actually have a ring...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 I have a ring.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I wouldn't brag too much about that thing, big guy.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Phoebe, will you marry me?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  No!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Uhm... Ha ha!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 I love you. But I never needed a proposal from you. I just needed to know that we were headed somewhere, you know, that we had a future.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 We can have any future you want.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Ok, I'm gonna take off.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 David, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Just so I know, if I had asked first...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I might have said yes, but that would have been wrong.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	David	 Please, you don't have to explain. I mean, perhaps if I hadn't gone to Minsk things would have worked out for us. And I wouldn't have ruined my career, or lost that toe to frostbite. It was a good trip! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Is it ok if I hug you now?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yes! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  BECAUSE OF OUR MEDDLING! Alright?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, ain't this nice? It's so quiet, I could just lie here all day.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I know 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Open your drapes! Open your drapes!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm so glad we've got adjoining rooms!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 The sun is out!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Hey! Remember when I had corneas?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ok listen, you go down to the pool and reserve the chairs, and I'll get the magazines and the lotion.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Ladies? Ross's speech is in 45 minutes.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Nooo!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Damn it!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Walls are pretty thin, guys!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Then we have to await the data from recent MRI scans and DNA testing which call into question information gathered from years of simple carbon dating.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Look at that woman sitting by the pool getting tan... so leathery and wrinkled, I'm so jealous!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Finally, factoring the profusion of new species recently discovered: Gigantosaurus, Argentinasaurus...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Not to mention the cold sores.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 And that's just the herbivores. I'm not even gonna discuss the carnivores, their heads are already too big. Which is ironic considering their stunted cerebral development.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Really?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 But all kidding aside, in much the same way that Homo ergaster  is now thought to be a separate species from Homo erectus...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 What?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 He said "erectus"!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 You're... you're kidding, right?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, he really said it.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 ... and while there are certainly vast differences between these Mesozoic fossiles and the example of Homo erectus...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Erectus?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Homo.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 ... in a very real way we can bring the Mesozoic era into the 21st century.  Thank you!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, thanks guys!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Man With A Bow Tie	  I thought... it was wonderful!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Man With A Bow Tie	 Jarvis Oberblau, Cornell.  I mean, the ideas you put forth and, and from someone... so... young... and... .
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Ok... now... now we're just holding hands! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 All right! Well, uh...  we're gonna hit the beach?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Yeah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  It was really... great!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, thank you so much!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, and so funny!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Ok!... All right, thanks! Thank you so much, you guys!  Oh, I can't tell you how much it means to me that you were here!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	  You're kidding, we wouldn't have missed it!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Oh... I'm back!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Ok!... Uh... excuse me? Yeah?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe, Mike	 Yeah! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hey!  Well...? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 You were incredible!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 You blew them away!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, I can't tell you how great it was to look at the crowd and see your face! I mean... uh, did you know you were  mouthing the words along with me?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	  I was not!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 No, it's ok! Made me feel like a rock star!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Oh my God!  I'm your groupie!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  I'd better not found you naked in my hotel room!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Look, I took it too far!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  I can't believe it's raining again! Oh, it's so unfair!!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Well, on the bright side, now you won't have to see all these paleontologists with their shirts off.  Not you guys. You got it going on!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 So, what are we gonna do today?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 They have a game room downstairs! Ping pong and stuff.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Ping pong?  Honey, they have ping pong! Let's play!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I don't think so!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Why not?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Because you know how competitive you get and well, I say it's cute, others disagree, and I'm lying!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I'm not always that bad!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Oh, yeah? What happened when we played last time?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  I punched you...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 ... Phoebe...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 ... and...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I clunked your heads together!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	  Hey! There you are!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Hey!  As soon as it stops raining we have got to go snorkeling! Some kid told me about the sea turtle and, if you blow bubbles in its face, it chases ya! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I'm sorry, I can't! I'm running a discussion group all afternoon.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Oh... oh, but that's ok, I'll find someone else to do it... I'll do it alone, but... I don't know what happens if the sea turtle catches you...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 You know... I feel so bad! I haven't seen you this whole trip and  especially last night...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey! Don't worry about it! It was fine! I ended up having the best time with Rachel! I just felt bad for you, stuck in that room, working on Ross's speech... 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Actually, it turned out to be a lot of fun!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Oh! Oh, well! At least we're both having fun!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Yeah...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 ... is it weird that it's not with each other?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! A little bit, yeah...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	  I think we need to talk...!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah... I think we do... ... about what?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 C'mon guys, it'll be fun!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 All right, all right... I'll play if we don't keep score!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 But then how do we know who wins?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Nobody wins!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 So, we're just four losers... SUPER!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I'm not playing with you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Yeah, I'm out.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 I'll play ya!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  OK!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Mike, you don't know, you don't know what you're doing!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 She gets crazy! This scar  is from Pictionary!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	  I think I will be all right!  You wanna volley a bit for a serve?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Sure! Got to!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Aww!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Oh, by the way... I'm awesome!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Oh dear God, there's two of them!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 You're ready to play?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Hell, yeah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Did you know this about him?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 No idea! I though he was soft like you!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Wanna make it more interesting?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 How much were you thinking?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Ten bucks a game?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Make it fifty!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 I'll make it a hundred!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  One thousand...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  OK!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 To see who goes first, you got a quarter?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  No...  Either of you girls got a quarter?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Honey, try to focus the trash talk on him!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Monica, you call it.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Heads! No, Tails! He-he-heads!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Tails!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Ow, what are the chances!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ha! My point!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Oh, no! I don't think so! You know, according to standard table tennis rules if at any time a player uses his non racket bearing hand to touch the playing surface he or she forfeits the point.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  He was a lawyer!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Alexandra Steele	  ... all these coasts having beautiful weather. In New York, it's 72 and sunny!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh! Weather bitch! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 It's open!  Hi, Joe!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Hey...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  What, is everything ok?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh... Charlie and I broke up.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Nooooo, why?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh well, she said we have nothing in common.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Oh, that's crazy!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, it's not, we have nothing in common!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 ... yeah, it's true.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I mean, she should be with someone like... Ross! You know what I mean, he uses all those big words too! Man, smart people are dull!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  What, hey!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  Ok, Rach!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I feel so stupid, you know? Why... why do I keep going after the wrong girls?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 W-What are you, what are you talking about?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Oh, c'mon, I mean, there's you, then there's Charlie, and it's like...  What the hell is my problem? OH! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ok... uh... maybe you're not always going after the wrong girl...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  I'm telling you, Rach, Charlie is not right for me!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, I'm not talking about her...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 But then who? The waitress I went out with last month? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 You know? Forget it!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  No-no-no-no, no! Who, who were you talking about?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 No, I-I-I-I don't, I actually don't know who I'm talking about! So!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Ok! All right, well... I'm gonna see if I can get a room for the night and I'll... I'll see you later!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, sure!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 You like me? 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Ok, let's not make a big thing about this!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  That's a huge thing!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Not working with me, Joe! Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts  musings, if you will!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 What... for how long?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Only like a month!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  A MONTH??
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What the... DIAL IT DOWN!  Listen, ok, and maybe they're crazy thoughts, but sometimes I do, I have, I've been thinking about... you know, us!  Ok, dial it up a little!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  I just have one question!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Shoot!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  What the hell are you doin'???
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 I don't know, I'm not trying to do anything, it's just, we have such a good time when we're together, you know... I mean, aren't you just a... little curious...  what that would be like?...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Uh, am I curious? I mean, I am as curious as... as... George!!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  Who...?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 CURIOUS GEORGE ! You know, the monkey, and the guy with the yellow hat!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Oh yes, of course, I remember him!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah, he had a paper route.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Yeah, he did!  Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 No, I know, yeah I know we're great but Rach no... this... this can't happen!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 But can it... just... happen a little bit?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	  NO, NO! It can't happen at all!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 But why, why not?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Because... look, no one wants this to happen more than me, ok?  I have gone over this moment in my head a hundred times and not once did I ever say no!  I couldn't do it to Ross!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 But that wasn't gonna stop you before!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 I know, I know! But I've thought about it a lot since, and it just wouldn't be right...  I'm sorry...!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	  I'm sorry, too!  OH GOD! I shouldn't have said anything!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 NO! No-no-no-no-no-no! Hey! Hey, we'll be fine! Li... hey, like you said: no big deal!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 It's not a big deal!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 NO BIG DEAL!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 It's so not a big deal!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Joey	 Yeah! I'll see ya later! Yeah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ok!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 Ok, I...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 AAAHHHH!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ooh! I'm sorry! I think, I THINK, that may have missed the table!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Do you?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ah, yeah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Do you?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Ah, yeaaah!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 DO YOU?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 AH YEAAAAH!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Do you really find this attractive on him?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Oh, yeah!  Are you telling me you... you're not even... a little turned on by Monica, right now?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I think this is the first time in our marriage that I've felt like the more attractive one.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 C'mon Mike, you can beat her! Knock that dog off her head!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh, damn it!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  I sleep with him!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	  Game, point!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Don't get too cocky! Remember I won the last one! Oh, by the way, how did that feel, losing to a girl?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 You know, you should really look in a mirror before you call yourself that.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 NO, NO, NOOO!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 And that's how it's done! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Okay-dokay, you've each won a game and I've lost what's felt like a year of my life. So everybody goes home a winner.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Best out of three?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 That's what I'm thinking.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Should I use my invisibility to fight crime or for evil?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Serve the ball, chump!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 : Serve the ball, chump.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	  Ok Mike, better come back Mike, better come back.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mr. Oberblau	 I'm just saying, I have a cabin in the Adirondacks if you ever want to get away from the city, well, that'd be  just nifty!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Ooh, well. Ah, I kinda have got a lot on my plate right now, not that I wouldn't love a weekend in the country with a strange man. 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Woman	 Jarvis?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mr. Oberblau	  Oh, you're back...  this is my wife, Nancy.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Get Out!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Ross, can I talk to you for a minute?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yes, please!  So, what's going on?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Uh, well... Joey and I broke up.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh my God, wh-what happened?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Joey is a great guy, but we're just... so different! I mean, during your speech he kept laughing at homo erectus!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I knew that was him!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Anyway I just, uh, I think it's for the best.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Hey, you ok?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I guess. There was hum...  there was another reason that I thought it was time to end it with Joey. I started to realize that I was having feelings for someone  else.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Paleontologist	  Ok Geller. Last day of the conference, you know what happens to the keynote speaker.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Oh, professor Clerk we're kind of in the middle of a conversation, here.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Yeah, can you guys just throw him in the pool later?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Professore Clerk	 Or we could throw you both in now!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Ok, gentlemen! Please! Aren't we a little old for this? I mean, we're scientists, right? We're academics. And most importantly I... you-you will have to catch us first. . GO, GO, GO! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Ok, so it's a tie again, 41 to 41.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Ok, look! Enough is enough!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 No, I have just to have two more points to beat him!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Monica, that was also true an hour ago! I mean, please, look at you! Your hand is blistered, you can barely stand, your hair is inexplicable! Ok, you've already proven you are just as good as he is, now we've missed our dinner reservations, so now let's just go upstairs, order room service, take a shower and shave your head!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't just walk away! I've put in four hours!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 But...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Look! You knew this about me when you married me! You agreed to take me in sickness and in health. Well, this is my sickness!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 What about the obsessive cleaning?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 That's just good sense!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Aww! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 You ok?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 No, no, no. Honey, I'm ok. Shake it off!  Oh, no! No shaking, no shaking! Ooh! Ooh!  Oh my God! I can't play!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 So you forfeit?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Mike wins?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 I can't believe it!  I lost!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 No, you didn't.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 What?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 Because I'm gonna play for ya.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 You can't do that!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Oh, that's ok. I don't care which of them I beat.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 Ok, we're taking that paddle home, mister.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Honey, you don't have to do this.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  Yes, I do. Now, I may not understand why you have to win so badly, but if it's important to you then it's important to me, because I love you.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 But... you suck!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	  You're welcome, sweetheart.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 All right Mike, let's get this over with. Sudden death. Whoever wins this point, wins.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Mike	 Ok!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Oh my God! You're good!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Phoebe	 It's like watching porn!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 And that's... how... it's done!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	  Oh my God. That was so amazing! When did you  Hold on! I almost forgot  loser!  When did you stop sucking?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I never sucked, I actually didn't want you to know how good I was!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 Why?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 I don't know.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Monica	 This is so great! Now we can enter into doubles tournaments!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Chandler	 That's why!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Thanks!
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Hi.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Are they still looking for us?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 Yeah. The bartender said that they split up into two search parties, the herbivores and the carnivores.  You know, we as a group are not the coolest.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I don't think they saw us.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I don't think they did.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 Hum, so, I started to say you something earlier, hum...  There was another reason I realized it was time to end it with Joey. I kind of realized I... was starting to have feelings... for someone else.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	  Oh. Can I... can I ask who?
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 I think you know.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I think I know too but I've been really wrong about this stuff in the past, so...
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I'm sorry... we... we can't.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Charlie	 All right, all right.
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Ross	 I mean, you just went out with my best friend, and I just think it'd be a really really bad idea.  Or-or not! 
09	23-24	0923-24	The One In Barbados, Part I & 2	Rachel	 What?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Oh, the way you crushed Mike at ping pong was such  a turn-on.You wanna...? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You know, I'd love to, but I'm a little tired.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I'll put a pillowcase over my head.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You're on!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 What's up?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Well, okay, Mike's taking a shower, which by the  way there's  no law against. And then we're gonna grab some food, so if you  want...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 ... finally...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Is that Ross?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Yeah, you can hear everything through these stupid  walls.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Sounds like he's with someone.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 He could be alone. This morning I heard him do  push-ups, and then talk to his triceps.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Wait a minute, I think Phoebe's right. You know I  hear someone else in there with him.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Ooh... Dr. Geller!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 God, you're amazing... I didn't even have to ask you  to call me that.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Oh my God, that's Charlie!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 She's cheating on Joey with Ross!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh that tart... floozy... giant...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I'm not sure about this.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah, you're right. This is none of our business.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 No I'm not sure that it's  the best way to hear  everything. Someone get me a glass!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm not gonna do this, okay? I'm not gonna eavesdrop  on my friend.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  Ooh... I love Barbados!  
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Ooh... I can't believe I'm kissing you. I'm    kissing Rachel!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 I know, I'm her!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	  Rachel and Joey! It's Rachel and Joey!!!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 What?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Get over here!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 ooh...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Wow!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	  Oh my God,  I love how thin these walls are!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	  Thank you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Hey, you know, before you said    that nothing could happen between us? What changed?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Well, I only said that because of Ross, you know. Then  I saw him kissing Charlie...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 What? Ross and Charlie?  Wow! She's really  making her way through the group, huh? Ah, who am I to talk?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I can't believe this. Rachel and Joey?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 How about the dinosaur twins in the other room?  No-one is manning that wall!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I'm on it!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Anything?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I think I hear curtains closing... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 We've got shoes being kicked off over here.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Bedsprings, unmistakable!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You do realise  that's your brother?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Not until you said it. Somebody switch!  Wait a minute... Ross and Charlie, Joey  and Rachel, Phoebe and Mike! We're the only people  leaving with the  same person we came with.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 That's not true. I came with Monica and I'm leaving  with Weird Al.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Okay, I've had it with the hair jokes. Tomorrow morning,  before we leave, I'm going to the salon.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Okay Buckwheat!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 You gotta hear this, it's great... It's like free  porn! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Weh...*sigh*
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 uhm... Is everything okay?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Yeah, It's just... I don't think I can do this...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Ooh... Is it because of what might be on the bedspread,  because I saw that news report too, with the infra red and the ... I could  just...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 No, NO!  Look, I need to talk to Joey. I mean, you guys just broke up.  Before anything more happens between us, I need to know he's okay with it.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 I uhm... I completely understand.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Alright, I'm gonna go find them...  I just need a... need a before I can... you know.  Grandma... grandma... grandma...  Okay, I see you later.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Okay...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 That's the door. He's gone...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 And she's... turning on the TV... and watching...  Miss Congeniality!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Honey, if you know it through a wall, you know it  too well!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey, what are you guys doing?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh, we're just... we're sad to go so we're just saying  goodbye to the hotel.  I love you... Paradise Hotel, Golf resort  and Spa... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	  Yeah, we had a great time, thank  you! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	  Bye!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Okay, uhm... Hey, you guys seen Joey anywhere?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 He's probably in his room with his current girlfriend  Charlie. That's the situation as we know it... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Well, if you see him could you please tell  him I'm looking for him?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You got it!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Thanks!  Thank you! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Other wall, people! Other wall!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	  Rach,  you there? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Oh my God, it's Ross. What are we gonna do?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. Just be calm. For all he  knows we're just hanging out together. Right? Just be nonchalant.  That's not nonchalant!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 No idea what it means.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Oh... okay, just hide!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	  Rach?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Coming! Try under the bed, try under the bed!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 There's no room under the bed. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Is everything okay?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Hi...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You know where Joey is?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 ...I really don't... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Can I talk to you for a minute?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah, sure... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I don't believe this... Have you guys been...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Shhh... This is the listening side of the  wall.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 And then she told me that she and Joey had broken up,  and that part of the reason was that she had feelings for me.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  Uh-huh... right... yeah...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 And you know I wanted to ask Charlie out since the  day I met her.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  Oh, I know... I know it's been  really hard for you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Anyway, one thing lead to another, and... oh... before  you know it, we were kissing. I mean, how angry do you think Joey is gonna  be?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  That is hard to say,  Ross. That is hard to say.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You know, I gotta go find him. He's gotta be here someplace.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 You would think!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Joey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Is he gone?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  How are you doing this?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Pssst...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 How... wha... Hey! What are you... What is this?  Have you guys been listening this entire time?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica, Chandler, Phoebe	 YE-AH!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Now, what is this?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Ah, what is this? Well, lets see, we kissed for ten  minutes and now we're talking to our friends about it, so I guess this is sixth  grade!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh no... Have you thought about it how complicated  this could get? What about Ross?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Well, he's with Charlie now.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Yeah, but he wants to talk to you before anything  really happens with her. And as his friend, I mean, don't you think  he deserves the same from you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	  You're a pain in  my ass, Geller!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 All right, look you guys... Look, we appreciate all  the advice, but this is between Joey and me and I think we can handle it...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Okay, well we'll go back in there, but will you  do one thing for us? The people that  care about you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Sure...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Enunciate!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Get out!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Are they right?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Probably, yeah... I mean, maybe we should... hold off  until we talk to Ross.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah... Yeah, we can wait, we don't have  to do anything tonight.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah, I think that'd be best... So, so I'm gonna...  I'm gonna take off...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	  Although... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	  I like although!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 I mean, you know... Ross and I haven't dated in like...  six years...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Six years? Wow... It's almost as long as highschool...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Absolutely! He's not thinking about you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 No...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I'm thinking about you...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Let's forget about Ross...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Forgotten.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 What's wrong?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Nothing...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey'S Voice, But She Sees Ross	 Seriously... What is it?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Nothing... It's really... It's nothing... Come here,  come here...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey'S Voice, Ross	 What's wrong?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Sorry, I just uhm... I can't seem to get Ross out  of my head...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Well, maybe I can help. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel, Ross	 Ooh, your lips are so soft... Do  that again... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah... we really need to talk to Ross...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Both	 Yeah
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You guys ready to go?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Not quite. Monica's still at the salon, and I'm  just finishing packing.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Dude! You're not taking your Bible?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You're not supposed to take that. Besides, it's  a New Testament, what are you gonna do with it?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Learn about Jesus...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 So, did you talk to Joey?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Uh, no... no. I couldn't find him. I'm just gonna talk  to him on the plane.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Yeah, sounds like a good idea... Dr. Geller!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Stop it!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 PHD
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You're filthy!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Hey, have you guys seen Monica?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Uh, actually I think she went to the salon.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, oh, she went to the salon alright...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Check it out!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Who's day just got better? CHANDLER!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Hey!... aaaaaahhhh!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 What do you think?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 I think.... I think I can see your scalp.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Don't you just love it?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Ye... Yeah... Yeah... You got shellfish in your head.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 It's so... something... You go girlfriend!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You've never said that in your life, have you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Not once.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 I thought so.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 And listen to this... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 What d'ya know... It's a treat for the eyes and the  ears.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Whoo, whoo. Wow, it's uhm... kinda weird that I'm sitting  next to Charlie after we broke up.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Yeah, it's almost if Air Barbados doesn't care  about your social life.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Look, does someone mind switching to sit with Charlie?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Oh, I uh, I mean, I... dude, I spent the whole conference  with Charlie.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I understand...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 No, I'll do it. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Wish I could switch with someone. I really don't  wanna sit with Allen Iverson over there.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Uhm... You know, once we're in the air and the captain  turns off the seatbelt sign... you feel free to roam about my cabin...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 You should be careful when checking your overhead bins,  'cause items may shift during...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Aaah... you're not good at this...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 You don't have to go home tonight, do you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 No, I think I can come over. It's Saturday, right?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Oh...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 What?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Uhm... I can't do anything tonight.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Why not?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 I have a date.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 You have a... You have a date? With who?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Oh, it's... my girlfriend.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	  You have...  have a girlfriend?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Yeah... Well, when... you and I broke up I started  seeing someone.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 For how long?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Three months.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Three months? Okay... This is probably none of my  business, but uhm, how long do you think you're gonna keep seeing her?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 I'll tell her that it's over tonight at dinner. I  promise.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Oh, okay... good. You do that. And then when you  get home, maybe there'll be a special delivery package waiting for you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Maybe I'll sign for it. Tear it open. Pull out the  packing material...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 You know what, we're gonna have sex. Let's just leave  it there.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Right, I'm gonna go talk to Joey. I think this is the  right time. He's always in a good mood after the flight attendant says "duty  free".
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Charlie	 Okay... Good luck.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Ross is coming over. I think now would be a really  good time to talk to him.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I guess so. I'm just... really nervous.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Okay, well keep in mind that by the time you're done,  they'll probably be serving dinner.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Ooh...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Still nervous?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I'm gonna get the lasagna.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey Rach...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Do you mind if I sit here for a sec.?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah, yeah sure! Yeah! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 So, I uhm... kinda need to talk to you about Charlie.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Okay, last night after you guys broke up... so sorry  to hear about that, by the way... Well, Charlie and I were talking, and...,  well...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 You kissed.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Wha...  What? What would give you that idea?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I saw you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Yeah, we kissed, but... nothing else... nothing else  happened, okay.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Ross, Ross, Ross... It's okay.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 What?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 It's okay. You know, I totally understand,  alright? You guys, make way more sense than her and I ever did, you know. And...  I want you to be happy.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Are you serious?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah... Now I have something...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 I am speachless... I mean the fact that you would put  my happiness first like that. I mean, you're an incredible friend, you know  that?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Oh... uh...  look... before you...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 No, I mean it. You are so loyal man, and selfless,  and generous...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I am those things, yeah.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 You know what? I know Chandler longer, so I always  think of him as my best friend, but now... I may have to rethink some  stuff...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Dude!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hey, if there is ever, anything I can do for you...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I can't think of anything.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Thanks!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 So hi!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Hi!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 So you eh, you talked to Joey?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Ah, yeah. We had a really good talk.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Oh! That's great!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Yeah!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Oh, so everything's okay?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Oh, no, it's great. It's great. He is... He is an amazing  guy.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Ah... Well, obviously I think so too.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Well, I'm so excited about this.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Really? Excited?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Are you kidding? I have had some very dirty dreams  about this...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Excuse me!  You didn't tell him, did you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I couldn't. He was saying all these really nice things  about me. I didn't want him to get mad and take 'em all back. I'm on a edge  on Chandler.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Oh God! Alright, fine. You know what Joey, forget  it. When we go back to New York, I will tell him.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Thank you. Yeah, I appreciate that.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Hi, Mike's place.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Hey, it's Mike.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Ooh, that was fast.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Oh, err... no, she's not here yet. You know, I think  I'm just gonna take off and break up with her over the phone...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah, you can't do that! Oh, come on Mike, strap  on a pair.Why don't you just tell her that we got back together. You know,  women appreciate honesty. We also appreciate gentle spanking once in a while.  Just F.Y.I.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 One more thing... There... might be a picture of Precious  on my coffee table.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Her name is Precious? Is she a purebreed or did you  pick her up at the pound?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Mike	 Anyway, I just wanna give you a heads up. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, oh and you know, if she gets upset, just scratch  her tummy and give her a liver snout. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 Hi, I'm Precious, who are you?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	  I... I'm Phoebe.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 Phoebe? Mike's ex-girlfriend Phoebe, the love of  his life? That Phoebe?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Enchanté 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Oh, I can't wait for everyone at work to see these...   Ow!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You go back to work tomorrow night, right?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Yeah!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 So if you want people to see them, then by definition  you're not  having them taken out... say, at the break of dawn?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Well, if I had them taken out, then I wouldn't be  able to do this.  You like that, right? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 What are you singing?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 It's "Bolero" from "10".
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 It's "Ride of the Valkyries" from "Apocalypse  Now"...  See, here's the thing: The corn rose were really a solution to your frizzy  hair problem. And now that we're home, we don't have that problem anymore,  so if you think about it... I hate them!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 You what? You said you liked them.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Did I? Let's refresh. I believe what I said was  that I could see your scalp.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Fine, so you don't like them. Everybody else does.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Again, let's journey back... As I recall what Rachel  said, was  she had never notice the shape of your skull before. And Joey...  Well, Joey didn't realise that there was anything different.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 You know what? I don't care. I like it like this,  and I'm gonna keep it. You're just jealous because your hair can't do this...   OUCH!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Hit yourself in the tooth?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 And the eye!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	  Hi... There she is. Hi Emma. Oh my God, I missed  you.  Oh Emma, I missed you so much. Hey... Did you have  a good time with grandma Green? Huh? Did she give you a bottle of anti-depressants  again to use as a rattle? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 That was one time, Ross, and they were only like  5 milligrams.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Ooh hey, Emma, daddy has some presents for you okay?  Okay? I want you to wait right here. Come here sweetie.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Aaah... Ross, actually there's something that I really  need to talk to you about.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	  Okay, shoot!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Okay, uhm... alright, here's the deal.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	  OH NO!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 What? What is it?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Oh, major shampoo explosion!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Uh, look Ross, this really isn't easy.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Oh, it's all over everything. Why?  Why me? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Because you took three hundred bottles of shampoo?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. You were saying?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Well, yeah... Okay, look it's about me and...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Oh, not another one! Oh my G... And this is moisturiser.  It's even harder to clean! Why? Why do bad things happen to good people?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Wow! Well, clearly this is not a good time.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Ross	 Duh, you think? 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, bye. Alright, so Mike's on his way over. See,  you thought you guys were meeting here, and he thought you were meeting at  the restaurant, so you know... Doesn't really matter who's right or wrong.  Point is... I'm gonna take off.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 I'm not letting you leave until you tell me what's  going on here. I mean, are you guys getting back together or something?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Alright... Susie, can I call you Susie?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 My name is Precious.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Yeah, I can't say that. uhm... Susie, I'm gonna be  straight with you... Mike and I are back together... and uhm... unfortunately  that effectively ends your relationship with him. And he's very sorry about  that and wishes you the best of luck in all your endeavours.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 I just can't believe this... Why?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Well, I don't...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 Oh, why would he do this? I mean, what's wrong  with me?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Nothing, there's nothing wrong with you.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do now?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Damn it woman, pull yourself together! Have    some pride, for the love of God.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Okay, not a fan of the tough love.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 I just can't believe that Mike didn't give me any  warning.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 But he didn't really know, you know. He wasn't planning  on coming to Barbados and proposing to me...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 He proposed to you? This is the worst birthday  ever.  
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 Look, Precious... Mike's not worth this.  You're an attractive, intelligent woman and let's face it, Mike's kind of a  wang. I mean, he proposed to me while he was still seeing you... He was gonna  break-up with you on your birthday? And, I don't like to kiss-and-tell,  but he cheated on you a lot this weekend.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 Oh, my God, maybe you're right. Maybe I don't need  him. I deserve to be treated with respect.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Precious	 Screw you, Mike. You're a coward and a bastard,  and I hope you rot in hell. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Phoebe	 You're welcome!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Honey, you've been in there for a long time...  Is everything okay?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Not really. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 I have a problem.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Really? What happened?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Well, I was dancing around, and singing "No Woman,  No Cry" and I got stuck.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 You can't move at all?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Oh, well, I can move... 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 If I untangle you, will you please get rid of thecorn rose?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	  I guess so...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	  Some of these look a little  frayed.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Yeah, I tried to gnaw myself free.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Hey!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Hi!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 So, did you err... did you tell Ross?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Well, I tried, but then he had a shampoo related  emergency. So I guess now it's your turn again.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... I think it's better  if you tell him, you know. It's easier for a woman. That way, you know, if  he gets mad, all you have to do is go... I didn't mean it. I'm so so--ooory. 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Yeah, 'cause that's what we do.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Alright, alright, okay, uhm... How 'bout this, how  about this? Tomorrow... tomorrow we'll both go and we'll tell him together.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Okay, that sounds fair. It just means that once again  we can't...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 I know, I know..., but that's okay. I mean, we can  control ourselves, we're not animals.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 No! Of course we can wait. Alright, so I guess that  means good night then?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Yeah! Good night! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Goo--ood night!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Good night! 
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Seriously, good night!
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Joey	 Stop saying good night.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Rachel	 Okay.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Look what I found in the drawer...  And you said I'd never wear this...
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 Now that I untangled you, how 'bout you doing a  little something for me?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Sure, what do you have in mind?
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 I think you know.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Really? I don't really feel like it.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	 This is what I want to do.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Monica	 Okay, I just don't get why you like it so much.
10	01	1001	The One After Joey and Rachel Kiss	Chandler	  She's an  FBI agent, posing as a beauty contestant.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Okay, Ross, I realise that you didn't expect to walk in and see  that, but.. Let me explain, okay?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 We weren't doing anything!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Rach, he just saw us.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Shhh.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 But what you saw, that is the extent of it, okay? One kiss.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 No, come on, that is a lie. We also kissed in Barbados.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Dude, chill!  Okay, we also kissed in  Barbados,but we didn't plan it, okay? And the only reason that that happened was becauseI saw you kissing Charlie.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Yeah, you started it! I've got to chill.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Look, we probably should have talked to you about this before it  ever happened, but..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 We feel so terrible about this, Ross.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Yeah, but it did happen, so...
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Ross?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ross?  Can we just close the door?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ross, say something. Anything.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 So you two are..?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey, Rachel	 Yeah.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 And have you .. ed?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 No, no, no!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 No, no, no!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 But if I hadn't walked in here, would you..?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Probably.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 No, no!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this.  You have every right to go nuts.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 I'm not going nuts. Do you see me go nuts?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 No, but you know what I mean.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Hey, hey, hey... If you two are happy, then I'm happy for you.   I'm fine!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Really?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Absolutely.  I'm fine! Totally fine. I don't know  why  it's coming out all loud and squeaky, 'cause really,   I'm fine.  I'm not saying I wasn't a little surprised to see you guys  kissing. I mean,at first I was like..  But now that I've had time to absorb it; Lovin'this.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Ross..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 It's all working out! Me & Charlie, and you two. You know what  we should do?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Calm ourselves?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 No. We should all have dinner. Yes, we'll do it tomorrow night.  I'll cook!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Look, don't you think that will be a little weird?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Weird? What? What's weird? The only thing weird would be if  someone didn't like Mexican food, because I'm making fajitas!! 
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 I do like fajitas.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 God, this adoption stuff is so overwhelming. There's  inter-country adoption, dependency adoption.. There are so many ways  to go, and this is like the biggest decision of our lives.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 There's a hair in my coffee.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Hey guys!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Hey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Hey, have you seen Frank Jr., 'cause he's meeting me here with  the triplets.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 You know, it's funny. Every time you say "triplets," I  immediately think of three hot blonde 19-year olds.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 That's sweet. Drink your hair.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Hey, what's all this stuff?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Oh, they're brochures from different adoption agencies.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Ooh, babies! Oh, this one is so cute, get this one!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 That's not really how it works.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Oh, how does it work?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 I don't know!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Well, if you're having a hard time, you should talk to my  friends, Bill and Colleen. They adopted a kid. I'm sure they'd help  you.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Thanks, that would be great. Hey, honey, wouldn't that be  great?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Alright, alright, alright. Remember what we talked about.  When we're in a public place, there are certain rules.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 That's not what we talked about!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Hey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Good to see you.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Good to see you, too.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Hi Frank.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Hi, how you doin'?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Oh, my goodness, they've all gotten so big!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Which one is which again?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, that's Frank Jr. Jr. pulling the tampons out of the  lady's purse. And that's Chandler climbing on Chandler, and that's  Leslie throwing bagels at him.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 "Willing to adopt triplets?" No!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Ah, can I just say I know we're doing this for Ross, and that's  cool, but if it was up to me, this is not what we'd be doing on our  first date.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Well, what would we be doing?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 I'd take you out for a romantic night. Some champagne, fancy  dinner, feel you up on the carriage ride home...
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Feel me up?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 In a carriage!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Hey, Charlie!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Hey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Hi, hi. So.. Dreading this?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Oh, you bet.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 So, did you bring a little something for Ross?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Actually.. It's stuff you left at my apartment.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Oh. Oh, thanks.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 And you know, you can just give me my stuff whenever you  want.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Yeah, I didn't throw any of that out..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 I thought I heard voices! Hi Charlie!  Hi Joey.   And.. Oh! You're gonna have to introduce me to your new  girlfriend.  I'm just kidding, I know Rachel, I know.  Come, please come in. Come in.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Okay, well, we brought you some wine.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Oh! That is so thoughtful.  She's a keeper. And what  did you bring me? 
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Uh, actually, that's..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Underwear, a toothbrush, and Van Halen CD. I can use all these  things!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Gosh, Ross, you know, you seem a little...
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 What? Fine? Because I am! Aren't you? Aren't you? Aren't you?  You see? Who else is fine?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Okay, listen, hey, Ross. Why don't you try to relax, okay? Maybe  have a drink.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 You know what? That is a very good idea. I'm gonna go make a  pitcher of Margaritas.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Oh, god. So adorable. Look at them sleeping there like angels.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Yeah, I really cherish these moments, 'cause before you  know it, they're gonna be awake again.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Well, they may be a handful, but they're so cute.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Yeah.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Oh, god, the last time I babysat them, they did the funniest  thing..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 I haven't slept in four years!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 That's a, that's a long time.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 You just don't know how hard it is, Phoebe. There's just so  many of them. You know, two I can handle. Two's great. You just hold  one in each hand, but what do I do when the third one runs at me with  his bike helmet on. I've got no more hands to protect my area! There's  three of them, Phoebe, three!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, Frank. I counted them when they were coming out  of my area.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Sometimes I think that.. Oh, no, no, no, I can't say it,  it's too horrible. No.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 What?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 No, I can't.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Oh my god, Frank, are you thinking of leaving? Because I  didn't have those triplets so you could just run out on them!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, no! I would never do that. No. I just was thinking  that, you know, maybe you could take one.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 What?! You can't separate them! That's terrible. Which one?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Thank you so much for seeing us. Phoebe has told us such great  things about you guys.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 Oh, please, we're happy to help.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Bill	 We went through the same thing when we were adopting.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 So, a lot of malfunctioning wee-wees and hoo-hoos in this  room, huh?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I mean, you have a lovely home.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Well, we appreciate anything you can tell us.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 Well, actually, I think this might help.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 It's pretty much all the information you need.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Oh my god!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 Everything is broken down into categories, and then  cross-referenced, and then colour-coded to correspond with the forms  in the back.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Thank you.  I think I just had a tiny orgasm.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Bill	 I know the process is frustrating, but it's so worth it.  Adopting Owen was the best thing that ever happened to us.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 That's great.  Can I see the book?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 You want me to wash my hands first, don't you?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 It's.. It's just so pretty and white.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 The bathroom is down the hall, to your left.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 I would have told him to do it too.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Can I adopt you?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Hey, you must be Owen.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 Yeah.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I'm Chandler. Hey, I was in the scouts too.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 You were?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Yeah, in fact my father was a den-mother.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 Huh?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 You know how to use a compass?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 I have a badge in it.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 You do? That's fantastic!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 You wanna see it?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I'd love to, but I gotta get back to talking to your  parents. They're telling us all about how they adopted you.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 What?!?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 What?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 I'm adopted?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I got nothing.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 The first batch of margaritas was not so great, but the second  batch is gooooood.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Oh, guys, this is fun, isn't it? You know? Just the four of us.  Just hangin'.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Dude, are you okay? And when are the fajitas gonna be ready?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 I'm fine! Hey, I'm great! I'm just.. I'm just proud of us.  There's no weirdness, no tension.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 No awareness.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 We make a great foursome. We should do more stuff together. Ooh!  Let's take a trip. Okay, where do you think we - we can go?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 My fajitas!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a  little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. You know, he  normally doesn't drink like this.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Oh, you know what? This is nothing. My father is a raging  alcoholic.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Oh, I'm sorry, have I made this evening uncomfortable?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Fajitas! Be careful, very hot plate, very hot plate!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 That is gonna hurt tomorrow!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Okay, well, this is crazy. Can't seriously be talking about me  taking one of your kids, can we?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 No, of course we're not.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Insane.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 I know.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Alice would never go for it, right?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, I don't know, she's pretty tired, too, I think we've  got her onboard.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Well, just you know, for argument's sake, you know,  hypothetically. Which one would you be willing to give up?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Huh.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Frank Jr.Jr.?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, you'd be getting a really good one. I mean, you know,  he's really funny. Like, the other day he made up this joke.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Uh-huh.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 What's green and says "hey, I'm a frog"? A talking frog!   Oh, no, you can't have him, he's too funny.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Well, alright, that's fine. What about Leslie?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, no, no. Not Leslie. No, she's, she's the only one that  knows how to burp the alphabet.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Alright, so that leaves Chandler.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, no, no, you can't have Chandler, no. No, no. She's my  little genius. I got big hopes for her. She's gonna be a doctor or a  realtor..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Wow, Frank. I think we just ran out of kids.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Oh, I think you're right. Oh, wow. Phoebe, I don't think I  can give one of them up. I mean, you know, they drive me crazy, but  they're my babies.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realise things were so bad. You  know, I'll help out more. I can - I can babysit any time you want. You  name the day, and I'll be there.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 How about tomorrow?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Well, that's not good. But you know, I can move some stuff  around, and I'll be there. You and Alice just take the whole day  together.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 You'd do that for us?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Are you kidding? That's what sisters are for.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Frank Jr.	 Look at them! Aw. I love you so  much.  Oh crap, don't  wake up, don't wake up!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Where are Bill and Colleen?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 They're in the kitchen getting something to eat. Can you  believe how nice they are?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 We have to leave!!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Why? What did you do in the bathroom?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I didn't get to the bathroom. I bumped into Owen on the way,  and he didn't know he was adopted. And there's a slight chance I may  have told him.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Oh my god, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace  everything in there. Get that binder, and let's go!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 Hey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Bill	 Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the  sour worms. Those are for Owen.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 I'll go get him in a second. By the way, you should know we  haven't told him he's adopted yet.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 But kids are so intuitive. Don't you think on some level he  already knows?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 I'm adopted?!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 See? Intuitive!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Bill	 What? Where did you hear that?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 He told me! And he paid me 50 dollars not to tell.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Which technically now you should give back!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Colleen	 You told him he's adopted?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or  something. Or at least whisper it to people when they come in the  door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa  is real."
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Owen	 He isn't?!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 We have to get out of here, baby!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Everyone? I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ooy.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 And to love. Ah, love. L-O-V-E, love. L is for life. And what is  life without love?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Oh my god, are we supposed to answer?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn  of  events, which I'm still fine with by the way. E is for how extremely  normal I find it. That you two are together. And now one day you might  get married and have children of your own.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Dude, are you okay?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Totally.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Ross, you don't seem okay.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 I'm sorry, it must be the pressure of  entertaining. I think everyone would feel better if we had some flan.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Wait, Ross. Ross. I - I have to take off.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 No!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 I'm sorry, I have a really early class in the morning, but  this has been lovely.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Wasn't it? And you thought it would be awkward with Joey and  that you never really liked Rachel.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 You're on fire! I'll call you in the morning, okay?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Okay.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Alright.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 God, Rachel, what Ross just said that is just so..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Oh, that's okay, girls tend not to like me.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Charlie	 Bye.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Okay, I guess it's just flan for three! Hey, hey, that rhymed!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 You know what, Ross? I think we're gonna take off too.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Oh, oh. Of course. God, I'm so stupid. You guys are a couple  now. I mean, you probably just want to be alone.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 No, no, it's just that it's getting late...
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Hey, hey, it's fine. It's totally fine. We've got plenty of  margaritas. It's all good.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 I don't even know what that's for.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 You know what? I think I'm gonna stay here and make sure he's  okay.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Yeah, that's probably a good idea.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Yeah. I'll see you in the morning.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Rachel	 Uh-huh. Okay. You know what, Joey, I don't think he's ever  gonna be okay with this.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 It doesn't look good, does it?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Morning. Here you go.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Thanks. Did you stay here all night?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Yeah.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 So you took off my pants and shoes?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 No, no, no. You actually did that when you were dancing to the  Chicago-soundtrack. Look, Ross, about, about Rachel and I. Listen, you  don't have to worry about that, okay? Because nothing is gonna happen.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 What do you mean?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Well, she and I said from the beginning that we weren't gonna do  anything unless you were okay with it. And clearly..
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Hey, what are you talking about? I'm fine!
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 It's okay, Ross, alright? I totally understand. Of course you're  not fine. You're.. You're Ross and Rachel.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in like, six  years. Oh my god, is that right? Has it been that long?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 That's what I hear, yeah.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 This is crazy. I mean, six years? And because of me you guys  aren't gonna be together? Can I ask you something? Really, what is  this thing with you and Rachel?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Come on, I mean, you know me, you know...
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Joey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 I'm crazy about her.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 And she feels the same way?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 I think so.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Well, then, maybe it's time we all moved on.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 Yeah, but, Ross, I mean, you're not okay with it.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 No, but I wanna be. Hey, I will be. Besides, I'm with Charlie,  right? Oh my god, I'm still with Charlie, aren't I? I mean, she didn't  see the dance, did she?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 No, no, no, no, that was - that was just for me. Are you sure  about this?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Ross	 Yeah, I'm sure.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Joey	 And we're okay?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Hey, Phoebs
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Hey.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 Uhm, we just wanna give you a heads-up. Bill and Colleen hate  us.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Monica	 What?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Phoebe	 Still, he had to find out sometime.
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 Yeah, but how would you like it if someone told the triplets  that you gave birth to them?
10	02	1002	The One Where Ross Is Fine	Chandler	 I'm gonna go tell Emma she was an accident. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 So, you and Rachel tonight, huh?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah. It's actually our first official date 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Wow! So tonight may be the night! You're nervous?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Naa, no. This is the part I'm actually good at.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 What must it be like not to be crippled by fear  and self-loathing.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	  It's OK!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 How can you be so confident?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Well, I... I know exactly what I'm gonna do!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Really? Like you have a routine?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 No, no no no no. See. Each woman is different.You have  to appreciate their uniqueness.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Really?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 No, I do six things! First, I look deep in her eyes.  Then, I kiss her. Next I take my hand and I softly graze her thigh.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 You mean like this? 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 NO! Not like that, no no. No, like this. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Oh, I see what you mean, that's quite nice. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 More foosball?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 ...and beer!!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross, Chandler	 Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Hey sweetie! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  WOW!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Hey! Stop staring at my wife's legs! No no! Stop  staring at your sister's legs!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 I'm sorry, it's just... how did you get so tan?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 She went on one of those spray-on tan places.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Eh, you got a spray-on tan?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Chandler gets pedicures!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  Why, why you do, like with the-the toe separators?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	  Why...why?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Still, I can't believe that's sprayed on... I mean,  it looks really good. I wonder if I should get one!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Sure, then you should get a mini skirt so you can  really show it off.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 So, do you get colours or just French tips?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 There. Here's their card.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Thanks.  Hey, I know where this  place is! It used to be an X-rated video...  florist. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Hey Pheebs!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Hey Phoebe!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh, you won't believe who moved back to town.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I know, Amanda! Ah! She called me  too! She's the worst!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Who's Amanda?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 She's this girl who used to live  in the building before you did. Then she moved to England and she picked up  this fake British accent. On the machine this is her message.  "Monica, darling! It's Amanda calling!"
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Are you trying to do a British accent?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	   Chandler gets  pedicures!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Just so I know, how many more of those can I expect?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 You know what Amanda said to me when she got me on  the phone?  "Oh, so sorry to catch you  on your Mo-Bile!" If-if you don't wanna get me on my mo-Bile, don't call  me on my mo-Bile!"
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I know, and she's always bragging  about all the famous people she's met.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh, I know! "Oh...I slept with Billy Joel".  All right, who hasn't?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Oh, what are we gonna do! I don't  wanna see her!!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Ugh, Let's just cut her out!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 What?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Cut her out of our lives! Just ignore her calls and  dodge her 'till she gets the point!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Oh, I guess we could try that, but...  it seems so harsh!  Have you ever done that?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 No, had it done to me though. Feels good !
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Well... I like how you look, what are you?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 Puerto Rican.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Two, I think a two.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 You've got to face the red light.  When the red light goes on the spraying is about to start so close your eyes.  When the spraying stops, count to five. Pat yourself down to avoid drip marks  then turn around so we can get your back. Got it?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Spray, count, pat, then turn, spray, count and pat.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 Wow, you catch on quick.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Well, I have a PhD, so... 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 One Mississipi, two Mississipi, Three Mis... WAIT! WAIT! I'm not-I've  not finished counting!!  
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 You sprayed my front twice!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 You've never turned?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 No, I barely even  got to three Mississippi. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 Mississippi? I said count to  five'!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Mississippilesly?  Well, how  bad is it?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 Ain't that bad yet, but it keeps  getting darker for the next four hours.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 So, how dark is it  gonna get?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 You got sprayed with two two'  s and...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 I'm a four?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 Yeah, but you're back's a zero.  You're gonna wanna even that out.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  Really!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 You might wanna get back in there.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  Ok!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Wait, wait a minute, there's no light  on the back wall! How do I know when it's gonna start? Hello?  Ah, oh, ah!  Ah!  The same thing  happened again!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Assistant	 You got two more twos?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  I'm an eight!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I thought you paid.  Ha, guess we won’t be going back there!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 So.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Hey what do you say, we move this onto the likes of  the couch?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I say ‘cheesy line’, but ok.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 What’s the matter?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I am sorry, I don’t know, I am sorry, I don’t  know why I did that!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey, Rachel	 Okay
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ok, so sorry.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I am sorry! Again... I don't know, I don’t  know what happened, I must be nervous!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I don’t get it, Chandler loved it!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ok, ok, ok. I promise, I promise, I promise, I won’t  do it again. I really do. I promise. This is gonna be great.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Ok.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	  Uh, was that good for you?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah. Could be Rachel asking if someone could  baby-sit again.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 It could be Amanda!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh, you’re right! I was just kidding about  Rachel. Babysitting is a gas!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Hello Monica. It’s Amanda calling again. I  am in the neighborhood hoping I can pop by your flat!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 You're from Yonkers! Your last name  is Buffo-Martisis!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Let’s see.. to assure you get this directly,  ring me back on my mobile.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Ok, don’t hold thy breath!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Hello? Is someone on the line?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Yes, I was looking for Monica.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Hang on, she’s right here.  Someone's on the phone, for ya.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 We weren’t picking up, it’s  Amanda!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	  I get pedicures!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Hi Amanda! Actually now... it’s...  is not a good time. Dinner tomorrow night?  Ok, Phoebe  and I will see you then!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Why, why, why didn’t you just say no!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Well, I said 'no' to her coming  over now! I couldn’t say 'no' twice! I get this uncontrollable need to  please people!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	  Fine, fine! You would not hold up well  under torture!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 And you would?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 I did!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Absolutely! Absolutely. I d... it’s just a  little weird, it’s you, and it’s me, it's just gonna take some  getting used to.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Ok. Well, how, how can we make it easier?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ok, let’s work from the top down!  Just work the bra, Joe!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Ok, yeah, got it.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel, Joey	 Okay.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 This thing welded shut?!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Okay.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 All right, turn around, I got to get a look at this  thing.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Oh!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ow!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Sorry!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Well this is romantic!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I'm sorry!  This never happened to me  before! I'm an expert at taking off bras! I can do it with one hand! I can  do it with my eyes closed! One time I just looked at one, and it popped open!  I blame your bra!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 It’s a standard issue bra clasp!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Then I blame you! Yeah! That's right! You threw me  off with all your slapping!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ok well, well I'm really, I'm sorry about that Joey,  but do you think that maybe on some level, you don't want to take  off my bra?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	   NAH! I don't have another level!! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Hold on! There is something different.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 I went to that tanning place your wife suggested.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Was that place... The Sun?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Oh! And it gets worse! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Oh My God! You can do a duet of Ebony and Ivory  all by yourself!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 How could you mess this up? It's  so easy? You go into the booth, you count to five and you turn around!!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  How do you count to five?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 One Two Three...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  Damnit! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	  oooh! Oh oh!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	  I Know!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 oh oh! What is up with Miss Hawaiian Tropic?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 How was your date with Joey?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Well, it was good.. until we got back to our apartment,  and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and  I kept slapping it away!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 You didn't like that?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Well, it wasn't just me, alright? He freaked out  too! He couldn't even undo my bra!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Wow, really? One time he just looked  at my bra and it popped open.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I do not know what's wrong with us, I mean, we have  kissed before and that's been great! But this time it was leading somewhere  and I was very aware of the fact that it was Joey touching me.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Well, you guys have been friends  forever. Remember the first time that you kissed Ross? How weird that was?  You couldn't stop laughing? You got through that.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	  Ok, that's true. That's true,  we can do this. You're right, you're right, we can do this. We're just gonna  power through!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Hey Chandler can I talk to you for a second .
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	  No need!! Problem solved, we are powering through  .
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Chandler,  stop! It is not going to pop open!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	  You don't  know! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Hey Phoebe!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Is Amanda here yet?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 No.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Oh good. Good, look  I'm so sorry, for screwing up that cutting-her-out plan. But I have a new plan.  Chandler agreed to call here in a few minutes with an emergency.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh! Well, what kind of emergency that gets us both  out of here?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Well, what do you think of Mike  and Chandler being in a car accident?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	  Are you kidding, I love it!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Hi!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Hi!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Hi! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	  Hello!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	  It's so nice to see you!  Both of you! Look at me. Look how young I look!  Oh gosh! We have so much to catch up on! But first things first: touch  my abs  I don't exercise at all!  Oh gosh, so Monica, you're married!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Yeah! Yeah! His name is  Chandler and...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	  Smell my neck!  It's  not perfume! It's me! It's my natural scent!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Musty!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Oh! Gosh! This is brilliant. Gosh, it's just like  old times. I'm so happy you two are friends again!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 When were we not friends?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Well, it was 1992, and I remember because that was  the year I had sex with Evil Knievel .
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Ehm, we were friends in 1992.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	  No I distinctly remember you were dodging  her  calls and trying to avoid seeing her. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  You were going to cut  me out?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Well...kinda.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Oh My God!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Oh! Bugger. Should I not have said that? I feel like  a perfect arse!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Yeah well, in America you're just an "ass".
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  Hello? Chandler,  what's wrong?  Oh my God, are you alright?   Yeah, I'll be right there.  I'm so sorry,  but Chandler was in a car accident. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	  Oh my  God. Was Mike with him?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Nope! 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	  Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Hey! Got champagne?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yes ma'am, ready to Power through!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Excellent! Stick it in the ice bucket, the phone  is off the hook, and in the interest of powering through ...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Uh!  
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Ok  Sexy, sexy, very  sexy, sexy.  Alright!  Lets do it!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Ok, you're scaring me a little bit.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Oh! Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this!  Ok. Aha! You like  that huh?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Oh! yeah!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 You like that?  Let's take this into high gear 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 uh uh!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Yeah baby, I'll show you how we do it!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 No, no, no! You kneed me in my misters!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 What? Oh my God! I'm so sorry. Joey? Are you ok?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	  Soldier down!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 We are not friends with Phoebe anymore.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 If she asks, I protested a little, but ok!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Oh Chandler! Thank God you're alive. Monica, can  I talk to you outside for a minute?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I have nothing to say to  you.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	  Wow,  my flat is twice this size!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Please, Monica? In the hall?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Ooh, that accident must have been terrible. You look  positively ghastly.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Well, aren't you a treat.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I can't believe you tried to cut  me out. Why Phoebe, why?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 It was right after we were living together and you  were driving me crazy, okay? You were really controlling and compulsive and  shrill.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I'm still all those things!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 You're also so generous and kind and scrappy!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	  I am scrappy.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Exactly! Look, no matter what I tried to do, I couldn't  keep you out of my life. Of all the people I have cut out, you were the only  one who ever clawed her way back in.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 It's because I'm scrappy.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Yeah, you are. And I'm so glad that you fought your  way back in, because I don't know what I would do without you.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 I won't know what I would do without  you.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Monica	 Well, I guess we should go back  in. When you gave me another chance, I guess we should do the same for Amanda.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Phoebe	 Yeah, I guess you're right.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Amanda	 Can you believe it. I've never had any professional  dance training.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Glenda	 Now, let me explain how this works. You go into the  booth, and...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 I'm gonna stop you right there, Glenda. Okay? Does  it look like this is my first time, huh? Now I want 4 two's... and I want them  all on my back.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Glenda	  Okay...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Wait a minute, there's two sets of nozzles, which one  is it?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Which... which... which... Which one is it?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 OH! SON OF A BITCH!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 What is the matter with us?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Well, I know what's the matter with me.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 No, I mean with us, you know. I mean, is it supposed  to be this... difficult?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I don't know.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 That fake British woman is a real bitch, but she  sure can dance... Hey!
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Hi! Hey, listen, can we ask you a question? When  you and Monica first hooked up, was it weird going from friends to... more  than that?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Kinda... you know, sneaking around, having to hide  from you guys...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 No, no, no... No, I mean... se-x-u-ally...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah, was there a part of you that... felt like it  was... really wrong?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Actually, no. No, it felt right. You know, it felt  like uhm... I can't believe we haven't been doing this the whole time.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 I can tell from your expressions that that's the  good news you were hoping for... Well, I'm gonna go continue to... spread the  joy.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Well, just because it happened that way for them  doesn't mean it has to happen that way for us.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah, yeah... Absolutely. I mean, just because something's  difficult doesn't mean that you quit.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Right, totally.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah, so we just keep trying and trying until we...  do it.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Yeah, and if doesn't work, then we'll be just one  of those couples that never have sex.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 That's a... pla-an.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	  Wow... I did not see this coming.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I know.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I don't get it. I mean, I was so sure this was what  I wanted. 
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Hmmm... Me too...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 I wonder how Monica and Chandler could do it?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I guess they weren't as good friends as we are.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Aah... I bet you're right.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 So...
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 I love ya.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Rachel	 Love you too... Alright, I'm going to bed.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Yeah, me too.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Joey	 Ooh, yeah, I'm not going anywhere for a while.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 Dude, it's Chandler. Let me in.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Go away! I don't want to see anybody.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 I know, I went to the tanning place and the same  thing happened to me. You have to let me in.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Really? Did you count Mississipily?
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Ross	 Dude, you're not tanned.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 No, I just had to get a picture of this.
10	03	1003	The One With Ross's Tan	Chandler	 I see you later!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	  Hey guys!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross, Rachel, Chandler	 Hey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Honey, I got us that room at the Woodford Inn this weekend.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 That place in Vermont? You can  take  a hint!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Wait, you can't go away this weekend! It's Emma's birthday!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Yeah!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 We're having a party.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Well, can't you just have the party when we get back?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 No.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 No,   that day... that won't be her real birthday!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Gee if only she were one and had no idea what the hell a birthday   was!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 C'mon you guys, this is really important to us.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Well, I'm sorry, but Chandler and I could really use a weekend away.   You know, to reconnect... emotionally.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 There's this thing I really want us to do. I read about it in Maxim...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Well, can't you just go to Vermont the next day?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Yeah, we want everyone to be there. As much as I hate to delay your doing   weird sex stuff to my little sister.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 And I mean, you know, you guys... This is a big deal. I mean, how can   we have her first birthday party without her aunt and her uncle!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 All right, we'll stay. We can just drive up after the party.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Fine, but if we end up not doing this Maxim thing because of this   party...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Believe me, that is not why we won't   be doing that!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 You know Pheebs, when I was little, on my birthday, my daddy would   hide a present in every room of the house, and then he would draw a treasure   map to help me find 'em all.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oooh, I love family traditions like that. When uhm...   when Ursula and I were kids, on our birthday, our stepdad would sell his blood   to buy us food!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  Hey guys!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel, Phoebe	 Hi!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Hey, I brought the camera for Emma's video.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, good, good! We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma   and we'll give it to her when she is 18.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oh, COOL!! Wow, it's like a time capsule!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Yeah!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oh, just think... she's gonna be watching that video on a TV that hasn't   even been invented yet! With friends who right now are just like babies! And   they'll be living in a floating city that the humans built to escape the ant   people!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 That's the hope! So, is Emma awake yet?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh no, it's still nap time. But she'll be up soon.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Ah, and where is Joey?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 I said it's still nap time.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  Hey, there is uncle Joey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Hey, say something to Emma on her 18th birthday!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 18, uh? 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Joey, NO!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 What, what!? it's for her hot friends!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 When they see this you'll be 52!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 And starting to think about settling down!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Hey Joey, will you please set this up for people to put Emma's presents   on?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 I'd love to! Yeah! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	  We were supposed to bring presents?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Yeah! I wrote Emma a song.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Oh, yeah! How was I supposed to know?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Joey, it's a birthday party.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Yeah, but for a one-year-old. What's the point... the other day she laughed   for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as   a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow and the cow says "El-moo"!    Yeah... that's a funny cup!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Hey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Hey hey! Where's the birthday girl?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, she's still napping
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Oh, sure, she was probably up all night, excited about the party   she knows is happening.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Look, I know that you guys really want to get to Vermont and this isn't   a really big deal to you, but it really is to us, ok? Emma will never have a   first birthday again.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 All right... you're right. We're sorry. Now let's wake up Emma and   get the fun time started!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 No really, she didn't sleep well last night, so we can't wake her up.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Are you freaking kidding me, Green?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack, Judy	 HI!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  Hey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 So glad you came!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 I can't believe Emma is already one!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	  I remember your first birthday! Ross was jealous of all the   attention we were giving you. He pulled on his testicles so hard! We had to   take him to the emergency room!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  There's something you didn't know   about your dad!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey Mr. and Mrs. Geller! Let me help you with that.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 Thank you!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Oh man, this is great, uh? The three of us together again! You know what   would be fun? If we gave this present to Emma from all of us!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 Which one are you?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 I can't believe Emma is still asleep!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I know, what are we gonna do?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 I've got a plan. I've got a plan. I'm going to ram this platter really   hard into your ribs. You're gonna scream out and that'll wake her up!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I'm not going to Vermont with this Monica!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey Pheebs, you know what? I was thinking... since you wrote a song,   maybe I could do something for Emma using my talents!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 So you’re gonna... hit on her?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 No, no, no! My talents as an actor!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oh!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 You know, I could like maybe... I could do a dramatic reading of one   of her books!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Or you could stick a fork in an apple!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey, I think Emma might like it!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh! Emma might like what?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Um, my present!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 What did you get her?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Actually we prepared performances.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Separate performances.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 But equally real!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Well, this sounds like fun! Well, you know what? Actually? People are   getting a little antsy waiting Emma to wake up from her nap, so would you mind   performing them once now?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Sure, yeah!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	  O K.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  All right, let’s get this party started, huh?   Joey and Phoebe are gonna perform a little something for us.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Oh, great!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	  Are you gonna be embarrassed going up there having nothing   prepared?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey, I do it every week with three cameras pointed at me and a whole   crew waiting!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 So, Joey, what are you gonna do for us?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 I will be doing a dramatic reading of one of Emma’s books.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, ok, which one?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Uh, why, it’s a...  one of her favorites, uh,    “Riding the Storm Out. Coping with post-partum   depression” eesh!  “Love   you forever”. Love you forever. By Robert Munsch. Published by Firefly   books. Printed  in Mexico.   A mother held her new baby and very slowly rocked him back and forth, back and   forth, back and forth, and while she held him she sang “I’ll love   you forever, I’ll like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby   you’ll be”. .   And while he rocked her, he sang “I’ll love you forever, I’ll   like you for always, as long as I'm living, my baby you’ll be”.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  Wow! That was amazing!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Thank you so much for that gift!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I was not ready for this today!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Amazing... amazing.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, Phoebe, I’m sorry! Phoebe has prepared something as well.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 That’s right, I've prepared a song for Emma. From my heart to   hers. For there’s no greater gift, than the gift of music.  Emma! Your name poses a dilemma. 'Cause not much else rhymes with Emma!   Maybe the actor Richard Crenna, he played the commanding officer in Rambo. Happy   birthday Emma!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Is that it?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 No, of course not! I also, you know, prepared a reading . “Sex and the single mother.  Finding your G-spot.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Everybody	 No, no, no, no, no!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Hello Emma. Happy eighteenth birthday.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 Right now that seems so far away, seventeen years.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Yes, you’ll be all grown up by then. We’ll be... Well your   grandfather and I might not be here.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 That’s true! This message could becoming to you from beyond the   grave, Emma!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 After all, my parents died very young.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 And my cholesterol’s off the charts!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Remember, Emma, heart disease kills women too!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Ok, cut! Great. That was... that was   just... yeah!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Ross, um, don’t forget to get a shot of Emma’s cake. It’s   in a box in the fridge.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Sure.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, you're gonna love this cake. I got it from a bakery in New Jersey,   Corino’s.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Oh my God, that place has the creamiest frosting! I use to hitchhike   there when I was a kid.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Well, anyway, they make these great novelty cakes, in all different   shapes, and if you give them a photo, they’ll copy it in icing!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Oh, did you do a picture of Emma?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Yes! On a cake shaped like a bunny.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Uh, Rach? Does this bakery by any chance also bake erotic cakes? Say   for bachelorette parties?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Ross, what are you talking about?  oh! Oh my God!   They put my baby’s face on a penis!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 oh! Now it’s a party!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Why you guys this isn't funny, all right? If I wanted this cake to   be a disaster I would have baked it myself!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Uh.. is it ok that I still think it looks delicious?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Jack, look at this.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 I know what you're thinking Judy, the resemblance is uncanny!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 I am this close to tugging on my testicles again.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 No, no, this is not what I ordered.   Ok? I went all the way to New Jersey so that I could have the perfect cake for   my daughter’s birthday and I need a bunny cake, right now!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Ask them if it would be faster if we cut the baby’s face off the   penis, so we can put it on the bunny. . That is a weird sentence!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh! Believe you me! I am going to bring this cake back, I don't even   want it in my home...  Joey, don't touch it!!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 I'm so confused!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  Yes, yes. I still want   my daughters picture, but on a bunny cake. Yellow cake, chocolate frosting with   nuts!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 To be fair this one does have nuts.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Hey Mon, that was really nice of you to loan Rachel your car so she could   go and get the cake.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Oh. So nice of her to pull my hair, 'till I dropped the key! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Well, you know what? While we're waiting, you guys could tape your message   to Emma for her 18th birthday, huh?  Ok!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Hi Emma! It's the year 2020. Are you still enjoying your nap?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 We're Aunt Monica and uncle Chandler, by the way.  You may not recognize us, because we haven't spoken to your parents in seventeen years!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 We used to be married, but then we missed a weekend away together   and things kind of unraveled. Because of you! Happy Birthday. 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Ross, Rachel promised it would be over by now. We seriously have to   go, if we want to get to Vermont. I called them and the last train leaves in   a half hour.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 And you know, I have a massage client soon.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 You guys, just please.. a little bit longer. I promise, Rachel will be   back with the cake any minute. Monica, remember.. the frosting? huh?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Alright, 5 more minutes.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  Hello?  Oh no! What happened?  Ok ok, where are you? . Ok, I'll be right   there. 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Was that Emma? Is she up? 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 No, Rachel got pulled over for speeding. She forgot   her licence so now I have to bring it to her.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Well, if you're leaving, I'm definitely gonnago.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 No! Wait! If anybody gets to go.. it's us    We've been complaining the longest!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 No, wait ! You guys, no, no, you can't leave! Rachel already feels bad   that the cake's messed up. How do you think she's gonna feel when she comes   back here and all you guys are gone?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I don't know! You'll tell us on Monday! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Joey! You're in charge, ok? You make sure nobody leaves! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Got it!  Hey hey hey!  Where do you think you're going? 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 To the bathroom!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Alright, well the rest of you get comfortable, ok, because we're gonna   be here for a li... Wait a minute, there is a window in there!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oh no! He's not getting away that easy! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	  What are you doing? Get the hell out of here! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Well, that one did not have Emma's face on it.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 No, it did not.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 No.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Well, we better get going, it's late. Jack's not allowed to drive at   night anymore. He has trouble staying in his lane.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Jack	 Last winter I went up on a church lawn and drove right through a manger   scene. The papers thought it was a hate crime.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Anyway, it was lovely seeing you.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Ok!  
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Bye... Bye dear.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Nighty-night!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Judy	 Nighty-night!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Bye, bye.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Joey? How could you just let them leave?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey, hey, hey, hey! I'm not gonna mess with Jack, he's a great man, he   fought for our country.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 No, he didn't! He pretended to be a Quaker to get out of Korea.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	  Oh! Well that's it! He's the last one to go. I'm locking you   guys in. 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 You do know, I can just turn them the other way around, right?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Oh! I forgot you used to live here!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hello?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Estelle	  Joey! It's Estelle!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Estelle	 So, how did your audition go today?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	  What audition?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Estelle	 The one I told you about last week?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 What? You never said anything about an audition!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Estelle	  Let me start over. I just got a call about an audition.   I think you can still make it. It's down at the Astor Theatre and you need to   have a monologue prepared.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 A monologue? I don't have..  I got it.     Aah! so... I'm gonna take off!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Wh.. what? No wait, you don't get to leave! I've got a massage client   waiting outside my door any minute!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Yeah, and we've paid for a room, that we're supposed to be in right   now!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Well, oh, ok now... Only one of us has to stay with Emma. Ok, and as   the person who realized that, I get to go!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 No! no! Let's figure out a fair way to decide who's staying.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Oh! I got it! Ok, everyone pick a number from one to ten. Alright? Whoever   gets the highest number gets to go first.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	  Ok, ten.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Okay, Monica picks ten, I call nine! Anyone else?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 No, lets just draw straws.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Or.. we could flip a coin, and then multiply the..
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I'm begging you stop.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Right.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Ok, how about this: We got wind up toys for Emma for her birthday.   We can make them race, and whoever comes in last, stays!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	  Yeah!! Let's do that!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	  That sounds more fun than the thing we were going   to do in Vermont! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Everybody get your toys! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Ok! I want the dolphin!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Thats a bear.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 I'm too excited!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Phoebe, you get the bear, uhm, Joey, you get the robot, and Chandler   and I get the dog. Ok, and the race is going to go  from here to here. Now the one who comes   in last, stays!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Ok, ladies and gentlemen, wind your toys! 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Ok, on your mark... Get set... GO!!!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Go! Go!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Come on robot!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	  What are you barking at?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Wha... How the hell is that gonna help?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I bought you. How did I forget that that's all you do?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Way to go robot!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Good job Alan!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Hey, good race you guys.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Yeah, see you later!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 No! No, no... wait! We didn't lose.  The rules clearly   stated that the last one to cross the finish line was the loser. Well, our dog   never crossed the finish line, so technically...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 They left.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  No, there isn't time to go to the bakery. We're just   gonna come home... Everybody left? Alright, well just tell Emma we're gonna   be there as soon as we can.  Bye...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 RACHEL!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 OOH! God! Sorry!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  I can't believe they gave you a ticket. You're such a   good driver.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Emma's awake.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Yeah?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 I can't believe this. This is her first birthday. She's awake. We're   not even there. Everybody left. We still have this stupid obscene cake.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Hey, maybe I can fix that, you know. Try to turn it into something else.   
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh, why do you even bother? I already ruined her first birthday...   And do you know how important these early experiences are Ross? Very! According   to the back cover of that book that you gave me.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Rach, she's not going to remember this.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  I guess... Oh, I just had such an idea of what this   day would be like, you know? Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her   cake singing "Happy Birthday". Then we would all go into... HEY GET   OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER!!!  They have to learn!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	  Hey!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 What?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 It's not bad.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  Oh my God! Look what... you made it into a   bunny. How did you do that?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Well, I just made these two things uhm... cheeks. And then I split this   to make ears.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Well, I'm very impressed.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Some can sing, some can dance. I apparently can turn phallic cakes into   woodland creatures.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Now another way to organise your stuffed animals, is by size.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I'm sorry, is this a game for Emma or for Monica?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Game?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Emma, you even know it's your birthday today? You're one! One-year-old,   that's little.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Ooh! That's my girl!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 That's how old you are.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Did I teach her that? Did I just... impart wisdom?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	  Ooh, I want one...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Me too...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 There's no-one around. Why don't we just take this one?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 ...and head to Canada!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 I was kidding.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 I wasn't. Let's get going!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Hey, are Ross and Rachel back?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 No, not yet.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 Oh good, I didn't miss the party.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 What about your massage client?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	 I just felt so bad, missing this. So I just slipped him a little something,   you know. As long as I'm back in five or six hours, it will be alright.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 Okay, if Ross and Rachel ask, I've been here the whole time. THE WHOLE   TIME!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	  I've been here the whole time!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Joey, we just saw you come in. You ran past us on the stairs.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 I don't care that you left. I'm just glad that you're here. Thanks   you guys!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Hey, guys! Come on! You gotta see what Emma just did.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 What?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Emma, how old are you? How old are you today? 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Emma	 Wo-ish. 
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh! Emma, that's right! You're that many!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Oh my God! Our daughter's a genius! Rach, this means...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	  NO, no science camp!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Damnit! I'll put a candle on the cake.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh!... Oh and Emma, look at your stuffed animals lined up so neatly!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Monica	 Thanks!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Okay, here we go! Emma's first birthday cake... Well hey... well, blow   out the candle. Come on Emma.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Chandler	 Let's do it, come on!
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 What's wrong? Are you okay?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Oh yeah, nothing! These are happy tears! This is just what I wanted.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	  Hey, you made it into a bunny.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Joey	 What is wrong with me. It looked more delicious when it   was a penis.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Okay.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 Okay, you ready?
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Ross	 A-a-and... record.
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Rachel	 Okay.  Hi Emma. Well,   your first birthday is over, and it was really...
10	04	1004	The One With The Cake	Phoebe	  Go, go, go Alan! Run you, hairy bastard!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 You know, I'm thinking about letting Emma have her   first cookie.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Her first cookie? She has cookies all the time!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 I've never given her a cookie. Have you?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 No! No... and, for the record, I've also never given her a frosting from   a can!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Hey Rach, the adoption agency needs letters of recommendation and we   were wondering if you would write one for us.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Of course, I'd be honored!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Thanks!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Thank you!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 U-U-Um, I think there's been an oversight.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Joey, we would've asked you, we just thought you wouldn't be interested.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Yeah, it's just we don't think of you as really being so much "with   the words".
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Whoo-weh hey weh-hey whoo hey!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Clearly we were wrong.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 I gotta a lot of nice stuff to say about you guys, ok? And I know how   much you wanna have a baby, you know, and I would love to help you get one.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 You know what? Then, Joey, we want you to do it.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Thank you! Alright, let me see how I'm gonna start... "Dear baby   adoption decider people..."
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 So excited about your letter!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	All	 Hey Phoebe!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Hey!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Wow! Don't you look nice?!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Yes, I do! Today is Mike and my one-year anniversary.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 OH! What's it the anniversary of? Your first date, your first kiss,   first time you had sex...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 YEAH!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 So you must be going to somewhere fancy to celebrate?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Uh-uh. Ehm, a Knicks game.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Uhm... Aren't you a little overdressed?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Hey, you know what, I've never had a one-year anniversary before, so   no matter where we go, I'm wearing something fancy pants, and... I'm gonna put   on my finest jewelry and we're gonna have sex in a public rest room.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 You guys do that? Chandler won't even have sex inour bathroom!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 That's where people make number two!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 Hey! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Hey...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 So, you know... I have a little time. If you... if you want to...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Oh...   Ohh... I'd love to   but I really have to grade these papers.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 Fine, it's fine...  I'll just shower by myself...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  B, B, B, B, B!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 Oh, Ross, you gave a B to a Pottery Barn catalogue.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Well, it had some good ideas, take off your shirt.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Damnit!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  Rachel!! Open up!! It's your sister!!  I have to talk to you!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Hi Amy!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You're not Rachel.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Still sharp as a tack!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Um... Charlie, this is Rachel's sister Amy. Amy, this is Charlie.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 Hi!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Hi!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Charlie	 Nice to meet you.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 H-Hi!! And you are...?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Ross? I... I grew up on your block! We had Thanksgiving together   last year... I had a baby with your sister!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  N-no... uhm... did I buy a falafel from you yesterday?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Yes, yes, you did.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Hi Rachel! Here's your sister Amy! She thinks I need  pec implants! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Amy! Hi! Oh-oh-hoh!  Wow! You remember Joey?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Yeah! Hey, sure! The "Days of Our Lives" guy!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 That's right, yeah.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You're not good!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Always nice to meet a fan!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 So now, what are you doing here?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, I have huge news.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Oh sorry, hold on. Let me just   check on the baby!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Wait, this is important! Can Ella wait? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Ehm... Her name is Emma.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Why did you change it, Ella was so much prettier!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 What do I know? I just sell Middle Eastern food from a cart!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Hey, your English is getting better!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Oh my God!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 I know, she may be the hottest girl I've ever hated.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 What... what you working on?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	  Oh, Monica and Chandler's recommendation. I want it   to sound smart but.. I don't know any big words or anything, so...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Why don't you use your Thesaurus?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 What did I just say?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Watch.  Here, you ehm... You highlight the word   you want to change.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Oh my God, that's great! I'm smart!! No, no, I'm...    "brainy, bright, clever", I love this thing! Look out ladies, Joey   Tribbiani's got the whole package!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 God!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 So beautiful.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh, I know, isn't she?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 No, I was talking about your bedding.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 All right. What's your news, Amy?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Oh! Um... Well... I'm getting married.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 What? Oh my God! To who?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 This guy! He has a killer apartment.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 A-And??
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 A-And it's on Fifth. And the elevator opens up right into the living room.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 No, what's he like?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Oh! He's ok. Do you remember my old boyfriend Mark?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 It's his dad.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Huh... wow, so he's gotta be...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Old? Yeah! But he travels a lot, so he's hardly ever there.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Sweety, I gotta tell ya... it sounds a little bit like you like the   apartment more than you like...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Myron. Hmm... I told you he was old!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh... sit down, sit down. Oh, honey, you know, I once also almost married   somebody that I didn’t love. Do you remember Barry?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Humpf, remember him? How we used to make out all the time after you went   to sleep.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Sometimes just nodding is ok.  Uhm, so but  anyway, listen, not marrying Barry was the best decision that I ever, ever  made. Honey, you deserve  true love. Your soulmate is out there, somewhere. Someone that is your age,  that is smart, that is fun and that you care about!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  You’re right, you’re right! I’m gonna   do it!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Ok.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 I’m gonna marry Myron and keep looking  for MrRight.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Ok, let’s keep talking.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Excuse me, anniversary. Excuse me, anniversary. . Uhm, sir, could you move your nachos... they’re in my   seat. It's my anniversary.  Here we are! . Can’t believe   it's been a whole year! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 I know. This has been the best year...  THIS HAS BEEN THE BEST YEAR OF MY LIFE!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 ME TOO! I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD LOVE SOMEONE THIS MUCH!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 I FEEL THE SAME WAY!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 YOU’RE SO GENEROUS AND KIND AND  YOU'RE   AMAZING IN BED   IT’S   OUR ANNIVERSARY!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Announcer	 Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the   big screen on the score board. Someone has a special question to ask. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Oh how lame... oh, it’s so tacky, and impersonal.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Really?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Oh, it’s the worst way to propose!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	  Excuse me... .
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Hey, finished my recommendation.  Here. And I think you’ll be very, very happy. It’s the   longest I ever spent on a computer without looking at porn.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	  I don’t... uh... understand.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	  Some of the words are a little too sophisticated   for ya?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	  It doesn’t make any sense.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Of course it does! It’s smart! I used the the-saurus!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 On every word?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yep!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Alright, what was this sentence originally? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Oh, ‘They are warm, nice, people with big hearts’.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 And that became ‘they are humid prepossessing Homo Sapiens   with full sized aortic pumps...?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yeah, yeah and hey, I really mean it, dude.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Hey Joey, I don’t think we can use this.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Why not?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Well, because you signed it baby kangaroo Tribbiani . Hey, why don’t you stop worrying about sounding smart and just   be yourself!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 You know what? You don’t need a thesaurus, just write from here,  your full sized aortic pump.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Amy, hi!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 I took your advice, I left Myron.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh, good for you! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 I know! I'm Erin Brockovich!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Yes you are! Oh, I am so proud of you!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Thank you! So, can I stay with you?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 But Erin Brockovich had her own house.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Ah, look who’s back!  Why do you have bags? RACH,   WHY DOES SHE HAVE BAGS?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, I’m staying with you guys!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 What?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 We’re gonna be roomies!  Come on!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 You slept out here?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Yeah... Amy kept kicking me in her sleep yelling ‘Myron, get   off!’
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 But uhm, we're getting rid of her, right? Rach, please tell me we’re   getting rid of her.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Joey, I can’t do that!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Oh, come on! Last night I was finishing off a pizza and she said  "Uoh oh oh, a moment on the lips, forever on the hips!"   I don’t need that kind of talk in my house!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Well Joey, uhm look, I know that she’s difficult, but I think   it’s really good that she’s here.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 'Cause we will appreciate it more when she’s gone?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 No, it's just... look, you know, when I first moved to the city I was   a lot like her! I was spoiled, self-centered and you guys really took care of   me.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yeah, Monica made us!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Well, uhm... whatever, I have really appreciated it, 'cause I don’t   think I would be the person that I am today if it wasn’t for you guys.   See, I wanna help Amy the way you guys helped me. And I know it’s gonna   take patience, but that’s ok.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Good morning.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yeaah.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why   I hung it on the door.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Oh, sweety, you can’t pull this off.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Amy, you know what? I was thinking that maybe now it'd be a good time   for us to sit down and, you know, talk about your future.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Oh, I can’t, honey. I’m gonna go get my eyebrows shaped.  I am not happy.    Oh... sure you wanna eat that?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	  I’M CURVY, AND I LIKE IT!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Hi. I just had the worst anniversary ever.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 I doubt that! Tell her about us lastyear.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Oh, well, I bought Chandler a five hundred dollar watch and he wrote   me a rap song.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Seriously?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Word!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Well, mine was worse than that.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Well, what happened?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 We were at the game, and this guy proposed to his girlfriend on the   big screen thing...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh, that is so tacky.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Well, that’s what I said, but it turns out, Mike was planning   on proposing to me that same way last night!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Oh my God, Mike was gonna propose?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Phoebe, that’s huge!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Well, do you wanna marry him?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Yeah, I really do! Yes, but, after I dumped on the way he was gonna   propose to me, I don’t think he’s ever gonna ask again! I mean,   I said no in Barbados and now this!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 She's right! If I were a guy and...  Did I just say if I were a  guy..?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Maybe you don't need him to propose to you, maybe you can propose to   him!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't know, I don't know, isn't that a little desperate?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 I proposed to Chandler!  Alright,   moving on...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Oh, I don't think it was desperate, I think it was amazing!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Thank you.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	  Well, do you think  I should propose?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 I think it could be kind of great!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Absolutely! You'll love the feeling! There's nothing like it!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Ok, ok, so how should I do it?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 How about at a game, on the big screen?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Uuuh!! How about at a Footlocker? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 What? what? He obviously thinks that's a nice way to be proposed to,   plus he'd never suspect it!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Yeah, that does make sense. Ok, now, would... would you two  like that?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Sounds good to me... but what would a guy think? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  Nana is on the phone 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Oh! That's interesting, since she died seven years   ago!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 She did? Who got her condo in Boca?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Hello?  Oh, it's our nanny!  Hi! Oh... God! I hope you feel better! Ok, bye!     That's Molly, she's sick. Can you watch Emma today?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 No, I can't. I have back-to-back classes. Did Molly say what she had?   Because my throat's been hurting?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Menstrual cramps.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 I don't think that's what this is.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Can any of you watch Emma?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 No, sorry sweety..
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 No, I've got work and then I'm proposing..
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Great, shoot, what are we gonna do?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, I can do it.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Well, actually... 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Well, can I talk to you for a sec.?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Um, I do not want her baby-sitting our child.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Why not?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Well, for one thing, she keeps calling her Ella!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Wha.. well, Ella's a nice name!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Fine, we'll call the next one Ella.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Wha... the next one?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Okay, um... I don't want her watching our baby.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Ross, I am trying to help her become a better person. This is a huge   breakthrough for her! She just offered to do something for another human being!!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 I... I don't know..
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Ross, I'm telling you, she's giving up getting her eyebrows  shaped to do this alright? Do you understand   how important that is in our world?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 um... listen, I couldn't help but overhear... 'cause I was trying to...   Listen, let me do this alright? I really wanna help you guys out, and plus Rachel's   been so wonderful to me... 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Absolutely.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  Oh! Great! So how much does it pay? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Hey Joe! How's the second draft of the letter coming?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Great, I'm finished! In fact, I just dropped it off at the agency.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 You dropped it off?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yeah.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Can we read it? Can you print out another copy?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 No can do amigo. No, I didn't use the computer. Felt more personal to   hand-write it. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 You hand-wrote it?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Yeah, and don't worry. I didn't try to sound smart at  all! See ya later! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Oh my God, oh my God, that letter is gonna go in our   file! We're never gonna get a kid. No, we're gonna be one of those old couples   that collects orchids or has a lot of birds!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 It's ok, it's ok. You know what?  I'll just   call the agency and tell them to throw out the letter. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Okay good.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	  Hello, this is Chandler Bing. Somebody just dropped   off a handwritten recommendation letter, and..  Uh-huh... Uh-huh...   okay... thank you. Good-bye. .
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Ugh, we're screwed, aren't we? You know what? Just tell me on the way   to the bird store.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	  They loved it.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 What?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 They thought it was very smart of us to have a  child write the recommendation letter.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	  They thought Joey was a child?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 She guessed 8, 9, based on his drawings.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Hi!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Hey, what did you guys do today?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Ella wanted to go out, so we went shopping and got some sushi.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 That sounds like fun.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Yeah, not really. Babies are dull.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Hey! Hi, how's my girl?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 I'm fine! And, I got you a present for letting me stay with you. Ready?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Yeah!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Ta-daaa!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  You pierced her ears!?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  Doesn't it make her nose look smaller?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 You pierced her ears? How could you do this without telling me? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, if I had told you, then it wouldn't have been surprise, now would   it?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 I think she looks cute.    ... but I am wrong!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh my God, Oh my God, here comes Ross. He's gonna flip out.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Why, did something happen to his falafel cart?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Ugh. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Hey guys. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica, Chandler	 Hi Ross.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Hey Emma. Oh, why is she wearing her hat so low? She can barely see.   .
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Nah, I don't really want her to see. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Why not?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 Because there are so many terrible sights in this world.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Like war. Or that thing in Joey's refrigerator. Remember? It was   in a milk carton but it looked like meat?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Come here  Oh! There she is! Hi!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  What?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Nothing.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Hi!  What... . Please tell me those are clip-ons. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh, they're real!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 Did she  do this to her? I told you we shouldn't have   left Emma with her!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 I know, I know, and you were right Ross.   You are soo irresponsible  I am never letting you baby-sit ever again!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Hey you know what, this kid needs me, okay? She needs   to have a cool fun aunt!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Monica	 I'm a cool, fun aunt!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  O-Okay!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Chandler	 Hey! Monica can be cool and fun at organized indoor projects!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 I can't believe this. All I wanted to do was help you try to figure   out what to do with your life and this is how you repay me?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, I don't need you to help me, because I already know what I'm going   to do with my life.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Oh yeah? Since when?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Since today... I am going to be a baby stylist.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  What?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	 That's not a thing!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Well, it should be. I'm gonna help babies learn how to accessorize, what   colors to wear, what clothes are slimming...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Babies don't care if they're slim.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Enter Amy!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  Amy, I ju... I just... I just wanna...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 What? What are you gonna do?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Ross	  No more falafel for you!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Great game, huh?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Uhuh, uhuh... 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Why do you keep looking at the screen?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 I'm not. I'm praying.  Please let the Knicks win... Thank   you Thor!  Where... where are you going?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Going go to the bathroom.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Well, I think you should wait.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Why?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Well, if you don't... if you don't hold it in, you don't get all the   nutrients.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Announcer	 Knicks fans, please turn your attention to the   big screen on the scoreboard. Someone has a special question to ask.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Mike Hannigan... will you marry me? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Announcer	 Get a load of this... She's proposing  to him. Guess we know who wears the pants in that family.  
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 That's not very enlightened!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Hey, hey!  Boo us? Boo you!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	  Hello? Yeah, this is Joey Tribbiani...   Oh, hi! Well, I'm glad you liked my letter... No my mommy and daddy aren't home   right now...  Okay, bye bye.   She was   nice!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Joey, get Amy's bags, she is moving out!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	 Whoo-hoo! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You're kicking me out? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 You put holes in my baby's ears!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Yeah well, at least now people will know she is a girl!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  I can't believe I ever even tried to help  you. You are so  beyond help.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You know what? Ever since I got here, you have been nothing but negative.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Excuse me?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You didn't want me to marry the old guy with the great apartment. Then,   I tried to help your daughter to de-emphasize her flaws  And suddenly I am the bad guy?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Joey, where are those bags?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Joey	  She has a lot of crap!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You know what? When I moved in here I thought: This is gonna be so great.   Just us sisters, back together again like when we were kids, except without   that stupid Jill... Oh! Who has gotten fat by the way...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Seriously?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 hm-mmm... Mom said she gained like fifteen pounds.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Hips or thighs?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Ass and face.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Oh! Oh my God! I thought she was on Atkins.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 She was. Carbs found her... See, this is what I wanted. Two sisters, talking   about real stuff.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	  Oh, I can give you that.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 You can?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Yeah. I just, I kept trying to make you a better person, but you're...   you're already a pretty perfect version of what you are.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	  Thank you. I've got to admit, Emma does lookcute.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 Did you just say Emma?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Ugh, I'm sorry... Ella.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 That woman at the game didn't know what she was talking   about. Mike, obviously you have balls.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 But please, let's just forget the whole thing.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	  I would love it. Consider   it forgotten... But just so you know... however and whenever you decide to propose,   I promise I'll say yes. Whether... whether, you know, it is in a basketball   game, or in sky writing, or you know, like some lame guy in a cheesy movie who   hides it in the cake.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 It's in the cake, isn't it?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	  Where else would lame Mr. No Balls hide it? 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 What's the matter with me? How do I keep ruining this? I'm sorry, I'm   sorry!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 No! It's my fault. I keep trying to propose in these stupid ways and   all I wanna do is tell you that I love you and I want to spend the rest of my   life with you.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 I'm gonna do this now.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Oh my God!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Phoebe, I...
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Wait! Oh wait!  Oh no! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Ready?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Uh-huh! 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Phoebe, I love you. There's no-one else in the world I would ask to marry   me... three times. But I wanna take care of you, have babies with you, and grow   old with you... Phoebe Buffay, will you marry me?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 Yes!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 I love you!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Phoebe	 I love you more!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Mike	 Not possible!  She's gonna   be Mrs. No Balls.
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 So how is the uhm... baby styling business going?
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Not that great. It's almost if people don't want to hear that their babies   are ugly. 
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Rachel	 That's shocking!
10	05	1005	The One Where Rachel's Sister Babysits	Amy	 Oh! It's Ross... Hey Ross!  Hello-oo Ross!  He's rude!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	  Hey...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	All	 Hey!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Hi!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Pheebs, what's wrong?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Oh, I'm just so exhausted from dragging around this...    HUGE engagement ring!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	All	 OH!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 My God!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Hey!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Congratulations! Wow!!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 So, did he get on one knee, did he have a speech prepared,   or  did he cry?  Yeah, big surprise,   I like proposals!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Well, it was really sweet, and like the  most romantic thing ever.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Well, hey! Well...    Here's to Phoebe, who's found the greatest guy in the world! To Phoebe and...    I wanna say Mike?  To Phoebe and Mike!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	All	 Whoo!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Thank you!  Oh, and I have something for   you!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Mmh-mmh!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 It's, yes, my little black book. It's got the numbers   of all the guys I've dated.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Oh, Pheebs, baby, that's nice but, you know what,   I think I'm ok. Why don't you give it to one of your other single girlfriends? 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 I would, but you're the last one.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	  GIVE ME THE BOOK!  Pablo Diaz, Brady Smith, huh, "Guy-in-van"?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Oh, my first love! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Oh!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 What does the red X next to Bob Greenmore's name mean?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Dead.  Oh, it's OK, no,  he  was old, yeah! And he lived a full life, he was in the first wave  at Omaha Beach.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Hey, I'm sorry, I should have given you guys my   black book when I got married! Although it wasn't so much a book as a... napkin.   With Janice's phone number on it.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Phoebe, isn't Jethro Tull a band?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	  Oh yes, they are.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	  Hey honey!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  Hi sweetie!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Is Monica not here?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 No.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Oh, then I'll tell you. My agency was bidding for  a big account and they got it! It's my first national commercial!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Cool!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Yeah, and I don't wanna brag but a lot of the ideas   were mine!  Hell, you weren't there? All the ideas were  mine!!!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 That's great! Hey, can you cast me in it?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Oh... I don't know, I really don't think you're   right for the part.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 What do you mean? I can do anything, I'm a chameleon!   Huh?  I'm old!  I'm tired!    Hey, I'm hot  I'm cold!! Huh??   Come on! What can't I do?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 First of all. Bravo. Uh, but I really don't think   you're right for this. The part calls for a stuffy college professor.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 I can do that!  "Hello, I'm   your professor. When I'm not busy thinking of important things or... professing.   I like to use..." Oh, what's the product?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Software that facilitates inter-business networking   e-solutions?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  I'm cold!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  Hey!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Hey!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Guess who's a finalist for a huge research  grant!  I'll give you a hint, he's looking right at you. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Ah, well, unless it's the creepy guy with his hand   up his kilt, I'm gonna say congratulations! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Oh, I'm so excited, I mean, apparently I beat out hundreds   of other applicants, included five guys I went to graduate school with. Not    that I'm keeping score or anything... five!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Wow, that's great! So, tell me about the grant!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Well, ok, it's for 25 thousand dollars. And if I get   it, I'll finally be able to complete my field research! And there   will be  an article about me in the "Paleontology Review"! Yeah!   That'll be  the first time my name is in there, without people raising serious   questions   about my work!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Wait. Are you talking about the Dewar grant?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Yeah. Why?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Benjamin Hobart is administering that grant.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Your ex-boyfriend?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Yeah.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 So, your ex-boyfriend is gonna determine if your new   boyfriend gets this grant? Wow, your new boyfriend is screwed!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 No, no, we ended up in great terms. I mean, if anything,   I think this could help you. You know what? Why don't we all go out to dinner   together, and I can introduce you.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Well, if you think it would help.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Yes, absolutely. I'll call him.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Ok, now, is there anything I can do to... you know,   butter him up? Anything he really likes?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Mmh... he does have a pretty serious latex fetish.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 We'll see how dinner goes.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	  Hey! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Hey, you wanna go to see a movie?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Well, I told you I had to spend all the day clearing   out stuff, so Mike could move in.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Oh, right.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Yeah. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Oh, well. Now that I'm here I might as well help you   with the cleaning and organizing! Just happen to have my label maker!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Oh, it's so hard to get rid of stuff! Did  you and Chandler have to make compromises when you first moved in together?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Uh, Chandler did! What does he want you  to give  up?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 A bunch of stuff. And the worst one... he wants me   to get rid of Gladys.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Who's Gladys?  Oh! What a tragic loss!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Yeah. I really hate to give her up. Oh,  I know!! Oh, you should take her!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	  Well, I-I-I-I... I don't know...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Why, you don't like her?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Well, of course I do. What's not to like! I'll   take her in a minute! But, you know, I think that you're giving up too   easy, honey. I think that you need to fight for her!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Really? You think?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Absolutely! Yes, you say to him "I'm sorry   Mike I can't live without her, she means too much to me!"
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Ok, I'll fight for her. Ok! Oh, wait, oh I just   realized... if I do that, that means you don't get her.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Damn it, I did not think this through!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Hey you guys. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Hi!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Oh! Any word on casting yet?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Joe, I told you, you're just not right for   the part.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 What do you mean? Rach, don't I seem like a professor   you'd buy some kind of e-crap from?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 I'm sorry, this sounds like something I'm never gonna   be interested in.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Look, c'mon, please? It's   not like I'm asking for some crazy favour. This is what I do for a living. I   am a professional actor!  Oh, man,   I'm two hours late for work! . Look, here's a   copy of my reels. It's got all the commercials that I've been in.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Joe...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Just watch it, and if you don't like it, you don't   pass it on to your bosses!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Fine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Thank you. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Work, Joe!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Damn it! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 What am I gonna do now?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Just pass it to your boss!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 He's not right for the part. So if I suggest   him, my bosses are gonna think I'm an idiot! And that's something they should   learn on their own!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked   it, but your bosses didn't. Then that way, you're the good guy and   they're the bad guys.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 That's good! I liked it, they didn't.    Joey, for God's sake,   go to work! .
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 I can't believe I'm about to meet Benjamin Hobart.   I've always thought of him as one of the people I'd invite to my fantasy dinner   party. Do you think there's any chance he'll bring Christie Brinkley   or C3PO?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	  Sorry, looks   like it's just him.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Charlie! My God, you look absolutely stunning!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Well, I... I am having a good hair day.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 So good to see you.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Me too. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 I'm ok.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 I'm sorry...  Ross   Geller... Benjamin Hobart.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 It's an honor to meet you. I can't tell   you how long I've been an admirer of your work, I mean, that Nobel prize,    whoooo! I mean, I have to tell you that, you're one of   the reasons I got into the field.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Oh, well, likewise. Actually, not likewise. I've   never heard of you until this morning, but, it's nice to be nice! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Shall we? .
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	  Thank you! . I can't   believe that you chose this restaurant! Do you remember the night?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Oh my God, I completely forgot!  Oh  my  God! I can't believe they let us back in this place! .
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 You weren't there!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 No, but, it's, you know, it's just a funny image,   you know, the two of you, in this restaurant, with... tzz-zzz,   mmm.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Ross, why don't you tell Benji about your proposal,   while I go to the ladies room?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 So, tell me about it.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Ok well, I would like to do a dig in the painted desert.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 M-m.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 See, there are still several areas that haven't   been fully excavated.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Break up with Charlie!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 What?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 What?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Did you just say "break up with Charlie"?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Well, yes, and now. Yes I did say it, and no, I   didn't not say it.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Kind of inappropriate, don't you think?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 I'm sorry. I just haven't seen her for so   long! All these feelings are rushing back! I'm starting to realize how much   I missed her, and I'm gonna need you to break up with her.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Are you serious?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 If you say yes then I'm serious, if you say no then   I'm joking!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 No!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Joking it is!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Hi! Sorry, I'm late.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Hey, how did it go with Mike, is he gonna let you   keep the painting?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 No, he really hates it. But he's gonna let me   keep my box of human hair! So you got to pick your battles. But the good news   is, Gladys is yours!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Wow, what's the bad news!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Who's Gladys?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Oh, she's that work of art I made, you know,   with the woman coming out of the frame.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	  Oh, and Monica gets to keep her?  In her house? I am so jealous!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Oh, I didn't know you wanted her too!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Huh!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Well, I mean, sure, of course. But... you already   gave that to Monica, so...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 You know, I would give her up, for you.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 No, I couldn't let you do that.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 But I want to.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 But I don't want you to.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 But I insist!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 But I insist harder!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Girls, girls, stop, ok? We'll flip a coin. Heads,   she's Rachel's, tails she's Monica's. . Tails! Monica, she's yours!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 No, that landed in your food!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	  No, no, that's ok. You won fair   and square. I'm so sad!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Hey Joe!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 What's up?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Bad news. I watched the tape and passed it along   to my bosses and they weren't interested.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  Oh.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	  I'm sorry man.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  But, ehm... you watched   the tape?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	  Yeah! I... I... I liked it!  But, ehm... my bosses didn't go for it.   Stupid sons of bitches!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  You didn't watch the tape.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	  What!? Of course I did!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Look, it's one thing not to cast me, but to lie to me?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 I'm not lying to you, I watched it!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Well, you lied again! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 I watched it!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Keep going Pinocchio!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	   I did!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  No you didn't! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	  I'm telling you, I watched the tape.   
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Did you watch the tape?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	   No!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 The selection committee has chosen the three of   you as our finalists today. The ultimate decision will be based upon the answers   you give to the questions I ask here. I'm gonna start with Dr. Li. Dr. Li, you   claim the field is too reliant on the Linnaean taxonomic system. How do you   propose to correct this problem?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Dr. Li	 Well, I believe that the answers lie in the osteological   evidence. I plan to begin there.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	  Interesting.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  I guess!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Dr. Biely, your proposal includes some field work.   Where might that take place?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Dr. Biely	 Primarily in the Pierre Shale region of South Dakota.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Certainly. Very well. And Dr. Geller, when is my   birthday?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  What? I... I...   
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Care to venture a guess?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  May 12th?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	  That's not even   kinda close!  Dr. Li, how many graduate students   you'd be needing?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Dr. Li	 Half a dozen.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 I see, and Dr. Biely?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Dr. Biely	 Three for excavation and two for analysis.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Certainly. Dr. Geller, which 1965 Shirelles hit   was later covered by a popular British invasion band?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  Wha..? I need 6 graduate students. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 No! I'm sorry, we were looking for "Baby It's   You". Baby It's You.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Wha...? Wait, wait, wait, just a minute. None of my   questions have anything to do with Paleontology.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 You're right, I apologize. Scratch the last question.   Spell "Boscodictiasaur".
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  um... I've never heard of a "Boscodictiasaur".
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Yeah, I just made it up. Spell it.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  Ok.  B - O - S ...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 No, it starts with a silent "M".
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Oh come on!!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 I can't believe Joey. I hate being called a liar!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 But you are a liar.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 What did I just say?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 You still here?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Yes, and I have to say, I am not just hurt. I am   insulted. When I tell somebody I did something...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Ok whoah-hey... Let me just stop you right there, ok?   First, you lied, right? Then, you lied about lying, ok? Then you lied about   lying about lying, ok? So before you lie about lying about lying about lying   about... lying...   Stop lying!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Why are you so sure I didn't watch this tape?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  You wanna know wh...? You wanna know why?    
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Well, this is going well. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  Here's how I know you didn't   watch the tape, ok?  If you had seen what was on this   tape, believe me, you would have some comments. Alright, now remember, I   got paid a lot of money for this and it only aired in Japan. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  And that's how I know you   didn't watch the tape! . 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 He really is a chameleon.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	  Well, Gladys say hello to   your new home! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	  Oh, my! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	  Wow!  Oh,   she's so nice and big! Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh   so proudly? 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	  I haven't really settled on a spot yet!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Well, hey! How about right above the TV? . That way, it will be   the first thing that you see when you walk in the door!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	  Yeah, yeah! And you can   get rid of that French poster.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	  I like that poster!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Really? It doesn't have anything coming out of it.   Or maybe there is some place for her in your bedroom?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	  Oh! There's   nothing above your bed!!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	  Are you still here?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Oh hi! Hello! Uh, have you come to ask me some more paleontology   related questions? Uhm... your grandmother's nickname, perhaps?    Aunt Margaret's pants size?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 I've come here to apologize. I think I may have   let my feelings for Charlie interfere with the interview process. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  No! Stop! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Anyway, I've decided to offer you the grant. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  Really?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Well... there is just one small... stipulation...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 I have to break up with Charlie?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Hey, you got one right!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 You're crazy.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Crazy, or... romantic?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Crazy!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Ooor...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  Get out! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 O-oh my God!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	  What?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Joey, what... is... this...thing... doing here?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 I got it from Monica. She sold it to me for a very   reasonable price.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Joey, we're not keeping this!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 But it's an original Buffay...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Alright, fine. You can keep it. As long as you don't   mind that she's haunted. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Hey? what? what? wey! whoo! what? what!?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Well, legend has it Joey, that... she comes alive   when you're asleep.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She climbs out of the frame, and then drags her half-a-body   across the floor, just looking for legs to steal.    And then with her one good hand, she slo-o-owly re-e-a-aches up and turns your   doorknob.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 GET THAT LEGLESS WITCH OUT OF HERE!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Hey! I sold that to Joey.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Well, why I told him it's haunted. Two can play at   this game. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 No, too late. You can't give it back! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Yes I can! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 No you can't. She's yours!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's yours!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 SHE'S YOURS!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's yours!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 Hey! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 She's m-i-i-ne!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 You guys! You guys! You don't have to fight over her   anymore.  Whoever doesn't get Gladys gets Glynnis. 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 I want Gladys!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 She's mine!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Look, I'm sorry I didn't give them your tape. And   I promise, next time to submit you whether I think you are right for the part   or not.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 That's not the point Chandler. The point is that you   lied.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 I know. You're right. What's it gonna take for you   to forgive me?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Monica	 Oh my God!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Excellent!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Now, what do you say?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 Lying is wrong!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 And?... AND?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Chandler	 I'm a pretty little girl.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Phoebe	 I knew it!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Your ex-boyfriend is insane.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Did you get the grant?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 No I didn't, and you want to know why? Because your   ex-boyfriend is still in love with you.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 What?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Yeah. He wouldn't give me the grant, because I wouldn't   give you up.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Benji isn't in love with me. I mean, he broke up   with me. And besides, he's a very ethical man.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Really? Is it ethical to ask someone in a grant review,   who was the voice of "Underdog"?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 I'm sure he was just joking, Ross.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 If you don't believe me, let's go talk to him, okay?   I'm telling you, he didn't ask me one paleontological question.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Seriously?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Oh, I'm sorry, no. He did ask me one. Uhm... How do   you spell Mboscodictiosaur?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Well, if it's like the lake Mbosco in Congo, then   M-B-O... 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Damnit!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Dr. Geller...? Charlie... What are you... what are   you doing here?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 I want you to tell her everything. About the deal you   tried to make with me, about the crazy questions you... Wally Cox! That's the   voice of Underdog!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Like I tried to tell you in the interview Ross,   this grant is not based on your knowledge of pretty useless trivia.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 No, no, no. Don't do that! I want you to look her in   the eyes, and tell her the truth.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Benji?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Alright, it's true. I behaved horribly. But it's   only because I still love you. And I would do anything to have you back in   my life.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Too little, too late, Benji!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 I can't believe this.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 I never should have broken up with you. I think   about you all the time. I mean, do you ever still think about me? 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	  No!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Yes!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 What?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 I don't know what to say, Benji. This is all so....   romantic.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 or...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 Listen, I know, I may be way out of bounds here,   but is there any chance you will take me back?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Maybe...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Sweetie, this conversation is starting to make me a   little uncomfortable.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 Oh God! I am so sorry, but...  I mean it's... there's so much history between us, you know...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	  I'm sorry   too...
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Benjamin	 I love you!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Charlie	 I love you too! 
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Ross	 Okay, that's it. WE ARE SEEING OTHER PEOPLE!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 Gladys?
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Ha ha ha, third time this week. Man, this does not   get old.
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Joey	 You're mean!
10	06	1006	The One With Ross's Grant	Rachel	 Oh, don't be such a baby!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Hey you guys!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Hey, what are you doing?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Oh, figuring out our wedding plans.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 That's funny, we were doing the same thing!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Yeah!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 It's really crazy! The hall, the dress, the food... I-I had no idea   how expensive this stuff was!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Yeah it is really pricey. I mean, I freaked when I first heard the   numbers.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 So what did you two do about it?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 It was pretty simple actually, I came up with a couple of cost-cutting   solutions, wrote out a list and Monica told me to go to hell.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 There's no way around it Pheebs, you just gonna have to accept the fact   that this is gonna cost you a lot of money.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 I heard that weddings are like a 40 billion dollar a year industry.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Yeah, and I'm responsible for just like half of that.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 But really, it does seem like this money could be put to better use?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Are you serious?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Yeah! Now, how would you feel if we gave all the wedding money to charity   and we just got married at City Hall?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 I think it would make me wanna marry you even more. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 I've got to say you guys, that's an incredible gesture!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  Maybe you do that next time you get married!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 No, no, no. The next time it's gonna be a Hawaii at sunset.  But   maybe the time after that!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Hey!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Hey!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 What's going on?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Our adoption social worker is coming by today so we are cleaning   the apartment.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	  We?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 You know you don't want me to help. You can't have it both ways!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Hey, is this person who decides whether or not you... get a baby?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Kind of. She's coming by to interview us and see where we live.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 And it has to go perfectly, because if she doesn't like something about   us she can keep us off every adoption list in the state.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Hey, maybe I should stop by! She could be a soap opera fan! It's very   impressive when the little people know a celebrity.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  Little people?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  Celebrity.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ok, so I think I'm just about done here, unless you have any bad stuff   hidden somewhere, like... porn or cigarettes?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 What...? NO!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Chandler?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  I don't, and I'm offended   by the insinuation!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ok, so there's not a magazine under the couch, or a pack of cigarettes   taped to the back of the toilet tank, or a filthy video in the VCR?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 I'll admit to the cigarettes and the magazine, but that tape is not   mine.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 It isn't mine!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  Well, I guess we'll never know whose   it is!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 May I help you? 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Yes. We're here to make a rather sizeable donation to the children.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Well, any contribution, large or small, is always appreciated.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Well, I think you're gonna appreciate it the crap out of this one 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Well, this is very generous!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 And we don't want any recognition. This is completely anonymous.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Completely anonymous. From two kind strangers.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Mr. X and Phoebe Buffay.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Well if you like, we can include your names in our newsletter.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Not necessary.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Buffay is spelled B-U-F-F-A-Y.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 And "X" is spelled uhm... "Mike Hannigan".
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Right. Well, on behalf of the children: thank you both very much.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Sure, I so glad we did this. It feels so good!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 It does. It feels really good!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Oh, look! And we get these free t-shirts! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Oh, actually, that's the shirt I wore to the gym.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Mhm... it's moist.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	  Hi!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Hi! Emma will be up in a minute!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Oh, good!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Oh hey Ross... Listen, I heard about you and Charlie. I'm really sorry.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Oh, that's OK. I'm sure there are tons of other beautiful paleontologists   out there.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Absolutely.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 There was one! She's it! All the rest look like they should live under   a bridge!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 So, uhm... what are you gonna do today?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Well, I was thinking of taking Emma to the playground!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Oh my God, what!?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Like I said I was thinking of taking Emma to the museum of knives and   fire!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok, look, Ross. I do not want Emma going to the playground.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Be-caaauuuse...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	  All right, well, if you must know... I had a traumatic... swing   incident... when I was little.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Seriously?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden   my hair got tangled in the chain. And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut   a big chunk of my hair!  And it was uneven for weeks!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	  And you made it through that? I wonder who's gonna play you   in the movie!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok, fine! You can make fun of me. I do not want Emma going there. And   I was thinking Claire Danes.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Look, I'm sorry to hear about your tragedy, ok? But the swings are perfectly   safe, and besides Emma loves them. You know what, you should come with us and   you'll see!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! Ok? When you're... and   there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're   gonna return back to earth!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Space is filled with orbiting children.  Look, please, just come   on, you know, when you’ll see the look on Emma’s face, I swear you   won’t regret it.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 All right!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Good, you don’t want to be one of those mothers who pass on their   irrational fears on their children, do you?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Irrational, huh? All right, well, I’ll remember that the next   time you freak out about a spider in your apartment!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Oh, yeah, that’s the same, I am sure there are thirty different   species of poisonous swings!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Oh my God, the adoption lady is early!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Ok, ok, here we go.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ok.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Here we go. Stand up straight.  Big smile. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Hello, is this the creepy residence?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 We’re waiting for the adoption lady, but, hey, I’m glad   you’re here. I was cleaning this morning and I found this . I don’t know if you wanna use it, but…
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Awe, this is so sweet of you! But you know what? I won’t be needing   a veil, I actually won’t be wearing a dress at all!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 I told you! I am not coming to a naked wedding! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 No, no, no, we’re not having a big reception, we took the money   we were gonna spend on a wedding and we donate them to the children charity.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 That’s crazy! . I am sorry. I just can’t   imagine giving up my one wedding day like that!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 We, you know, we’re different! We don’t care about having   a huge party.  This is really nice for you, but, oh,   please, I put this on?  And, ow, I look , why, well, radiant.  All right, well, who cares,   I don’t need a pretty veil and a fancy dress.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 That’s right. You’re making a commitment and that’s   the same, whether you do that at the Plaza or, where are you gonna do it?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 City Hall.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ow!  Oh, that sounds nice! I am just   there for jury duty. They really spruce that place up!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 It’s ok, it’s ok. I made my decision. What I really want   is a great big wedding 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Yay!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 But you already gave all your money to charity!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Well, I’ll just ask for it back!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 I don’t think you can do that!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Why not! This is her wedding day, this is way more important than some   stupid kids!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 That’s sweet, honey, but save something for the adoption Lady.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok, careful.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Ok.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Careful, watch her hair. WATCH HER HAIR!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Rach, she’s got like three hairs!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 I know  but they’re just so beautiful!   Oh, my God, I just pulled one out.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 I promise you she’s safe! No watch how much she loves this. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Ready sweety?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Here we go! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok, careful, ok.  Oh, she’s smiling! Oh my God,   she does like it!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 See, I told you!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Awe!  Oh my God! Looks, she’s a little dare-devil!   Oh, let me push, can I push?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Oh, absolutely!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok. Oh God.  Get the camera, it’s in the diaper bag.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Ok!  See? Scared   of swings, I bet you feel pretty silly  Ow!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 We’re seriously asking for our money back?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 It’s for our wedding day! Right, now, is this guy gay or straight,   because one of us gonna have to start flirting.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Wow! Are you here to make another donation the same day? I don’t   think that that’s ever happened before.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Gay, go.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Oh my God, I love your shirt!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 The donation we made earlier, we k…, we w…, we want it   back.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Excuse me?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Yeah. See, that money was for a big wedding, that we thought we didn’t   want, but it turns out we do.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 So you’re asking us to refund your donation to the children?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Yeah! This feels really good.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 I am sorry. I am, but this wedding is just really important to me.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Hey, it’s not my business,  besides it’s probably a good thing. We really would have been   spoiling the children, all those food, and warm clothing…
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Hey, that’s not fair! A person’s wedding is important!   And especially to me! Ok? I didn’t have a graduation party! And I didn’t   go to Prom. And I spent my sweet sixteen being chased round a tire yard by an   escaped mental patient who is his own words wanted to “kill me”   or whatever. So I deserve a real celebration and I am not gonna let some sweaty   little man make me feel badly about it.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 She could have been talking about either one of us.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Hi, I am Laura, I am here for your adoption interview.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Hi, I am Monica and this is Chandler. Please come in.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Thank you!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Would you like something to drink?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Oh, water would be fine.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ok. Great. I am so glad that you are here. We’re really excited   about getting this process started.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Oh, because we love kids. Love ‘em to death.Well, not actually   to death, that's just a figure of speech - we love kids the appropriate amount...   as allowed by law.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Your place is just lovely.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ah, thank you. This building does have a wholesome family feel to it.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 You know, I... I feel like I've been here before. Are any other couples   in the 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Is that that couple on the first floor? Because we should get a baby   before 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 But other than that... wholesome, wholesome building.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Oh...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 What?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 I just realized why I remember this place.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Really? What is it?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Oh, it's nothing. I went on a date with a guy who lived in this building   and it 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Ohh... that wouldn't by any chance be... Joey Tribbiani?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Yes!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Of course it was!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Yeah, we had a really great night and in the morning he promised he   would call 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 RAT BASTARD!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 So you're not friends with him?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica, Chandler	 OH GOD NO! Nope, no, no, no. No! No, no. Nope! No, no,   no, no, no, no, no, no, no. NO!  No!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Well, I'm sorry I brought it up. So, are either one of you planning   on staying at 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  Hellooo? Anybody in there order a celebrity?   
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 What was that?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Oh, it's just some crazy guy who roams the halls here. He's great   with 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 SON OF A BITCH!    (To the 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ross, see! I told you, those swings are evil! Alright, that is it.   That is 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 No! No, no, no, no, okay, it wasn't the swing's fault. It was my fault   and kind 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ross, c'mon, please. Can we just get out of here, before somebody else   gets 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 No wait, okay, okay, I have an idea. I want you to get on the swing,   okay? And 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	  I know what this is all about... You've   always been 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Look, I just think you're an adult, okay? And you should get over your   silly 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Alright fine. I'll do it.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Good.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 If you hold a spider. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	  WHAT?   WHERE? WHERE?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 IF you hold a spider.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 I know. (Rachel bends down to Emma and Ross looks over his shoulder again,   
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Guys? Everything ok? It's me, Joe...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA......AAAaaa-doption!!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 What's going on?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Oh, just like I said. That crazy... Bert... roaming the halls. (Joey   bangs on 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Guys!?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Keep on roaming Bert! We don't want any crazy today!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 What's going on?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 WE'LL TALK TO YOU LATER, BERT. EVERYTHNG'S FINE!! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Everything doesn't sound fine!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Is he alright out there by himself?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Oh yeah! He has a caretaker. His older brother... Ernie.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Bert and Ernie!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  You can't make this stuff up!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 You never told me about that guy on your sweet sixteen. Oh, ugh. I'm   sorry about 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	  Oh! It ended okay. One of my friends shot him. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Well, hey, at least you're getting a proper wedding. I mean, you really   deserve that.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Yeah, I really do. You know, I had nothing growing up. (thinks for   a few 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 No! No, no. I see where this is going. Don't make me go back there.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Look, I can't have a wedding with this money now. It's tainted.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Alright, fine. We'll give the money back.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 And if that guy at the charity gives us a hard time, my friend hasn't   shot 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Well, I must say, this seems like a lovely environment to raise a child   in.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Oh, by the way, you are more than welcome to look under any of the   furniture, 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Oh! Well, actually, before we look around, let me make sure I have everything   I need 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	  Why don't I show you the baby's room?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 What the hell are you doing?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Well, you wouldn't let me in, so I thought you were in trouble.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Well, we're not.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 But you called me 'Bert'!? That's our code word for danger!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 We don't have a code word.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 We don't? We really should. From now on, 'Bert' will be our code word   for danger.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 So that was the baby's room. (They come out and Chandler throws Joey   behind 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	  What room should we see next?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Any room that isn't behind this couch! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	   Some people   don't 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  I did not care for that!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	  You have to get out of here. You slept   with 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Ok, ok! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Ok!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 What?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 I forgot my bat.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Oh my God!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 And for the last time, we do not want to be friends with you! And   we don't want to buy your bat! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 What are you doing here?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  Bert! Bert! Bert! Bert!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Are you friends with him?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 I can explain... Joey...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Uhm... ok... uhm... Well, yeah... You have got some nerve, coming back   here. I can't believe you never called me.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Excuse me?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Oh... yeah... Probably you don't even remember my name. It's Joey, by   the way. And don't bother telling me yours, because I totally remember it...   lady. Yeah! I waited weeks for you to call me.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 I gave you my number, you never called me.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 No, no! Don't try to turn this around on me, ok? I'm not some kind of...   social work, ok, that you can just... do.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	  Well, I'm pretty sure I gave   you my number.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 Really? Think about it. Come on! You're a beautiful woman, smart, funny,   we had a really good time, huh? If I had your number, why wouldn't I call you?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 I don't know... Well, maybe I'm wrong... I'm sorry...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 No, no, hey, no! Too late for apologies... ok? You broke my heart. You   know how many women I had to sleep with to get over you? 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Joey, wait!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	  NO! I waited a long time, I can't wait anymore... 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	  I'm sorry that you had to see that. I'm so embarrassed...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Oh, that's really ok.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Yeah, that we totally understand. Dating is hard.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Laura	 Boy, you people are nice... And I've got to say... I think you're going   to make excellent parents.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Joey	 LAURA! 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	  We're back!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Are you here to take more money? Because, I think what you're   looking for is an ATM.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 No, no, we're here to give the money back.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Yeah, because you know what, it's... it's all about the children. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Although... it's also about the wedding... Ugh, alright... here.  No... Oh God... Oh!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 If I haven't said so already sir,    congratulations!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	  Ok, look! Enough! Alright? I'm stepping   in. I'm putting my foot down! As your future husband I'm going to make this   decision for us.  Now... what do you think we should do?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 You know what? It's not your decision anymore.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 What?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 On behalf of the Children of New York, I reject your money.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 But... but... but we're giving you this!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Yeah... And I'm giving it back to you... Come on! Consider it   a contribution. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	  Well, this is very generous!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Please, take the check, go have a great wedding and a wonderful   life together.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Mike	 Well, I mean... It sounds good to me. And that way we can save up, come   back in a few years and make an even bigger donation.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 Absolutely! And when you do, make sure you ask for Brian.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Phoebe	 Oh, is that you?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Charity Guy	 No!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Hello...? Oh hi... Oh my God...! Really...? I can't wait to tell Chandler...   Ok, goodbye. 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Wrong number?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 It was Laura... She gave us a great report and we are officially on   the waiting list.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 That's great!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Monica	 Now we just have to wait for a call and... and someone tells us there's   a baby waiting for us. Oh... 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Chandler	 Hello...? Have you seen Joey's bat?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok... I got a spider. There were two, I picked the bigger one.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	  Ok...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 Ok... 
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	  This feels perfectly normal. Ok,   get on the swing!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	  Ok... O-k...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	  Ok...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 whoo... ok... wow... ok... OH!
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 See?
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 A-alright! I can do this.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 There you go! Good for you! And you know what, I'm actually getting used   to this little guy. I don't really even feel him in here anymore.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 That's because he's on your neck.
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Ross	 Well...  Whaa... aaah... aaahhh...
10	07	1007	The One With The Home Study	Rachel	 ROSS!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Hey guys!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Hi! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 We need to talk to you about something.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Yeah. We don't feel like we can host Thanksgiving this year.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	All	 What?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Are you kidding?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Well, it's just with uhm, work and the stress of adoption, we just don't feel like we have the energy. Plus, we don't think it's fair that every year the burden falls on us. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  That doesn't sound like you... That's Monica talking!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 No, no! We made this decision together. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 She's putting words in your mouth!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Don't you put words in people's mouths, you put turkey in people's mouths!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 I can't believe this! This is Emma's first Thanksgiving!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 No, it's not!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 It's not?  When was she born?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, personally I think it's great you're giving yourself a break.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Thank you, Pheebs!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Sure. It's just as well... I mean, last year wasn't very good. I think she's losing her touch.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 What? You are way off, lady!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Am I? Really? Am I? Well, why don't you cook Thanksgiving dinner and prove me wrong! Well, think about it, think about it, you'll be trying to top than you did last year. You'd be in competition... with yourself.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 That's my favourite kind! Okay, we are doing this!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Don't let yourself get manipulated this way!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Hey, stay out of this, Chandler! This is between me... and ME!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 We are supposed to make these decisions together! Did you not watch the Doctor Phil I taped for you?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Hi! Happy Thanksgiving!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh, yeah, happy needless-turkey-murder day.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 You guys, I ordered some chocolate pies from that bakery on Bleecker. Could you pick them up for me?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 You're not making the pies yourself?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 No, no, no, I don't make chocolate pies. When I was younger I-I enter in this pie-eating contest. I ate so many that just the thought of them made me sick.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Did you at least win the contest?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 2 minutes, 12 pies and a part of one tin! Okay, I see you guys at 4.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Can't wait!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 This dinner is gonna be so great! In your face, last year "me"!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Hey Rach.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 What's Emma doing today?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Well, let's see... uh... I know that she has a meeting with her lawyer and then she has to make a very big poop. Why?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, I wanna enter her in a baby beauty pageant.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh my God! That's the creepiest thing I've ever heard!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Okay, but, well, before you say no, my friend Susanne is entering her kid and compared to Emma she's a real dog!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh! Phoebe, all babies are beautiful!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	  Oh... okay. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Phoebe, just the idea of pitting one baby against another, I mean, you know, and judging who's cuter just for a trophy... 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 And a thousand dollars.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 ...is something I'm very interested in! Oh please, do not tell Ross. He still believes that  what's in the inside is important...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Okay, oh, and Emma needs a cowgirl outfit for the competition.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Where am I gonna get a cowgirl outfit on Thanksgiving?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, I was thinking...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh, take the clothes of Joey's Cabbage Patch Kid. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Yeah!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  Did someone drop the baton again?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Why come all the way from Kansas to do that?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  I don't get older. I just get better!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 You know what just occurred to me? This could be our last Thanksgiving just the two of us. I mean, we could be getting a baby soon!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 You don't know that.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Somebody is gonna pick us. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Yeah, but we haven't heard a thing from the adoption agency and it has been weeks!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 I'm telling ya! It's gonna happen. Next year it's gonna be you, me and the little Hemingway Bing.  What, he's my favourite author!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Name one of his books.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  "The Firm"?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Ok, let's see... uhm, okay, the turkey is in the oven, the stuffing is ready...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 You know, you always cook this meal all by yourself. Let me help this year. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Oh, Chandler, that's sweet. But you don't have to do everything Doctor Phil tells you to do.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 I'm serious, let me do something, just not the turkey or the stuffing, nothing "high profile".
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Ok, let's see... Oh, the cranberry sauce, it is easy to make and no-one really cares about it. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Tell me more.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Okay, I'm gonna go check on something across the hall. You start by washing these  Not with soap!! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 You obviously haven't tasted my Palmolive potatoes!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Hey! Hey, guess what Joey has!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Three tickets to today's Rangers game!!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Dude, I wanted him to guess.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Oh my God!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah, they're great seats too!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Guess where they are?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Center ice.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Did I do something to you?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Hmm, the game's at one.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 So? 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Dinner is at four, we'll never gonna make it back.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 So we'll leave before it's over, we'll be back in time.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 You say that now, but it could take us a long time to get back home. Plus Joey could get lost and and they could have to page us to go pick him up.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Dude, two times that happened!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Look, Monica has been working hard all day, she didn't wanna host this thing in the first place, we shouldn't go!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 He's right, man.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Right, I guess. Alright, so see you at four. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Okay.  And get ready to taste my very special cranberries. Or should I say... chanberries!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 That's some gentle comedy, dude. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 We're still going at the game, right?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Yeah.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Host	 This is contestant number sixteen, Rebecca...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Hey.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh Phoebe, listen. Well, I think we gotta go. This place is really freaking me out. I've been watching this guy over there, I don't think he came with a kid!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 We can't leave now! There was this one baby, Haley, who was favourite to win and she got croup, so she had to stay home! This competition just blew wide open, folks!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Phoebe, I think... It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh, I know, we should have been more prepared.  It's okay. Now, the way I see it, our real competition now is Cameron. Oh my God, they just took her sweater off. Look at those arms! Hello Michelin Man.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh, Phoebe! Come on! You know what, it's already three o'clock and they haven't even gotten to Emma's group yet. We gotta go, we got dinner!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	  But Emma's got what it takes, she could go all the way! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Phoebe, you have to calm down.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Okay. Rachel, the hottest babies in the Tri-State Area are in this room right now! I overheard one of the judges say that not one of them holds a candle to Emma!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Really?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Yeah!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 You heard them say that?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Yeah!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 All right, okay. Alright, let's give to these babies something to cry about!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Good! Oh yay! Let's get down to business! Emma needs some makeup!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 No, what?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, she's gonna look all washed out next to the other contestants!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Why not!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Because I already did! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh, Bob, get off the guy!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Oh! What a game, huh?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I know, yeah.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I can't believe Chandler is missing this!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah. I am sorry he's not here too, but I got to say,  I am really enjoying Nacho Chair.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Yeah, I'd probably enjoy it more if you didn't keep batting my hand away.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Ohhhh! These seats are great!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I know, I know! When I was here for Holidays on Ice  I was sitting so far away Michelle Kwan couldn't read my banner!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Wow, hey, we'd better get going. If we don't leave right now, we'll be late for dinner.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Oh, but it's a kind game! So we're a little late, you know, the girls will be there, let's stay just for one more goal.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I don't know...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 One more fight!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Okay.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Okay.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Where is everybody? They're forty-five minutes late!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 I can't believe they are not here! I slave and I slave for what? They've ruined cranberry day!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 How late are we?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Forty-five minutes.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Wow 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  Here!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Okay. Rachel and Phoebe are already there, okay? So they probably started without us. We could just slip in and no-one needs to know where we were! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 You may want to lose the foam finger!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. You just want to put it on your hand!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Hey!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 You are not at Thanksgiving?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 No... 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 No, we're late!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 What are you doing here!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 We're late too! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 We figured we could be late because you guys were gonna be on time 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Don't point that thing at me, Tribbiani!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 So, nobody's here? Monica's gonna kill us!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah, where were you!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, what's with the trophy!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Uh, we were at the Spelling Bee!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 And I won!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 You won an adult Thanksgiving day spelling bee.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Yes!  Y-E-S. Yes!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Let me see this...  Grand Supreme Little Darling, New York Division.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Yeah. That's me!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 You entered Emma into a Beauty Pageant?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 And it looks like she put makeup on her!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Wait a second, wait a second, where have I seen that cowgirl outfit before...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I can't believe this, she's our daughter! That you would treat her like some kind of showdog is inexcusable! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 She won a thousand dollars!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 So this is an annual thing?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Oh! That's Alicia Mae Emory's outfit!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 You guys, there are people in there who are not getting any happier!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Yeah. What are we gonna do?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Well, I don't know, you guys figure it out, I got to put Emma down for a nap.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 All right. Hey Rach, while you're in there, throw something on Alicia Mae. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Alright, what are we gonna say?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Ooh, we'll say that we were mugged! You can't get mad at someone who's been mugged!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh, good, that's good, but you don't look like you were mugged!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 No. Here 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  HEY!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Do you hear something? 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  They're out there!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Ohhh! Let me see! Oh God, I can't believe this! They're an hour late and they're just staying out there, talking!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  Everything is so distorted! Looks like Joey has a giant hand! Which says "Rangers" on it. They went to the game!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  Oooh! They are in for a world of pain!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  Ross' shirt is torn.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Oh! They're late and they're sloppy!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Alright, Emma is napping...  what happened to your shirt?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I got mugged. And they stole my pocket.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 We're just... we're trying to figure out an excuse. Hey! Ooh! How about this: We can say that Monica told us 5 o'clock, not 4 o'clock. That way we're right on time!  OR... or, we can plant PCP in the apartment and call the cops on her.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  That would be a good way to get rid of all the PCP we have lying around.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. We'll just act casual. We're not late, we're right on time. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  We know you're out there. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Who do you think its from?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh, God. This is bad. This is so bad.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Well, let's just go in there and face them.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, I'm not going in first. I bet that vein on Monica's forehead is popping like crazy. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I hate that thing, it's like a... bolt of lightning.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh, hey, I have an idea. Why don't we play rock-paper-scissors, and whoever loses goes in first.  Ready? .
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Ah-haah! I win!!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 What is that? 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 That's fire. Beats everything.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh, really? Does it beat water balloon? . 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Ooh! Well played, Phoebe Buffay, well played. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Alright, enough, enough, come on. Let's just all go in at the same time.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	All	 Alright, okay. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 It's locked.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Wha...? Oh sure, now they lock it, but when they're having sex on the couch, its like: "Come on in, my butt is surprisingly hairy". 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Alright, come on...  Alright, you guys. We're so sorry we're late. Please let us in, so we can have dinner together.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 No! Everything's cold. The turkey's dried out and the... the stuffing is all soggy.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Yeah, and there's a bowl of cranberry sauce that...  what happens to cranberry sauce?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  Nothing. It's fine.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  Oh thank God!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Come on you guys, we're sorry, alri...? Our subway broke down.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  That's a lie, you went to the game, I can see Joey's hand.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TAKE IT OFF!! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I had a dream once about a fax machine that did that. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 That's all the turkey you're gonna get.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 How are we gonna decide who gets this?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  WATER BALLOON! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 What are we gonna do? I'm starving.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	  Oh, I just remembered. We do have something to eat. Monica put something in our oven this morning.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Oh yeah!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Hey, you touch that and you will be sorry.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Guys, I'd listen to her. The vein is bigger than I've ever seen it. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Huh... OH MY GOD IT'S BRUSSELS SPROUTS. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 That's worse than no food.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 HA-HA! All you got was Monica's stinky Brussels sprouts!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Stinky?!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Please let me stay on this side of the door.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh, I know... I still have my old key!  We can just unlock the door.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Well, I don't know if that's such a good idea. They clearly don't want to be with us.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 You know what? I don't want to be with them either, but it's Thanksgiving and we should not want to be together, together. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Just get in there and make a face to face apology, you know? Look them in the eye. I know I can get them to forgive us.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I don't know...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I'm telling ya...  I can do it.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	   Yeah, he can do it!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Oh!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh! It all looks so beautiful: the turkey, the stuffing...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 The cranberries...?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Oh! Enough! A monkey could have made 'em!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Hey listen guys, we feel really terrible.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 He's doing that weird eye contact thing. Don't look at him, don't look at him! 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Come on you guys, we want you to know we're  very very sorry.   Right guys?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I feel terrible.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe, Rachel	 So, so sorry.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Now let's not ruin this day. You worked so hard. Let's move past this and try to have a nice meal all together, huh?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 The floating heads do make a good point.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Yeah, they do seem to feel pretty bad.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 So bad.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 So bad.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 So bad.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  Okay, okay. You two  go get the dessert. And I'll let you in. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Dessert?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Yeah, I asked you and Phoebe to pick up the pies. You did remember, right?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Pies, oh, we thought you said priiiize . Here! .
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Grand Supreme Little Darling?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Congratulatioooons!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Oh my God! YOU FORGOT THE PIES? Well, I cannot believe this. You force me to make dinner, then you're an hour late and you forget the one little thing that I asked you to do.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Really girls, not cool.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Well, you manheads aren't any better. You lied about going to the game. You knew it would make you late, and you still went anyway.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Hey! I'm getting a little tired of this okay? We said we're sorry. It's Thanksgiving for Pete's sakes! A day of forgiveness!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 It's a day to be thankful.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Don't make me come up there!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 It's too late for apologies.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Fine! Let's just go. I don't need your stupid dinner.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 That would be a lot more convincing if you weren't drooling.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Ewww, is that what that is?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Sorry!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Come on you guys, let's just do our own Thanksgiving.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Yeah! I'll cook!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Yeah! Let's go out.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Hey!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah! You three have a nice Thanksgiving.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 The three of us?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah! You, Chan, and the vein!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Ha!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh-oh! I'm stuck!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Joey, that is not gonna work.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 No seriously... I'm really wedged in here.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 I'll pull you through.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Okay.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  aaw-ahhh-aaahhh STOP! STOP! I'm worried about damaging my head.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 A little late for that.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Alright, hurry up, you gotta do something.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Alright, well, this does not change anything.  Okay, we need to get something to grease the sides of his face.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Uhm, we've got turkey grease.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Bring it.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I just wanna say that I'm sorry I referred to the vein as a seperate person...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Here you go!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh, that smells good!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Okay.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Okay, try it.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 It isn't working.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Alright, we're gonna have to unscrew the chain.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Well hurry, I can't feel my ears!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Can you ever feel your ears?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Interesting...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Chandler, where are your tools?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  Oh, I left them on my bulldozer... I don't have tools!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 I do, but Rachel borrowed them.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 I lent them to Ross.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I gave them to Joey.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 I left them at the park.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Oh!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	  I'm finding it really hard not to mess with him.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 I've already stuffed a bunch of Brussel sprouts down his pants.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 Nice!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 It's really starting to hurt.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Okay, look, I'm gonna pull on the door and you guys push as hard as you can. Maybe we can get enough room to wiggle him out, okay? Okay, so PUSH!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 Just a sec., we're kind in the middle of something here.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Ooh! Stop putting things down my pants!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Come on guys, PUSH!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Yeah! Come on!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey, Chandler	 PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 My cranberries!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	  Man, I've got food all over me.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Argh! I can't believe what you did. Monica's gonna kill you!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	  Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	  I don't care.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 What's going on?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 That was the adoption agency...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 And?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 WE'RE GETTING A BABY!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 Are you serious? 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 There's a pregnant woman in Ohio, and she picked us!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 I'm so happy for you!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 This Thanksgiving kicks last Thanksgiving's ass!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 To Monica and Chandler... and that knocked up girl in Ohio.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Ross	 I'm just so happy you guys are finally getting a kid.
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Phoebe	 I know. Have you considered pageanting?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Monica	 I can't believe they called, and we're actually getting a baby. 
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Oh, I know how you feel...
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Rachel	 Really?
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Joey	 Sure. I went through the exact same thing with Alicia Mae Emory... The waiting, the wandering... Then one day... I get that call from Toys "R" Us... She was in stock!
10	08	1008	The One With The Late Thanksgiving	Chandler	 That is the exact same thing.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	  Hi!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 We're just here to say goodbye, we're off to Ohio.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Oh, right! Your adoption interview!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Yep, we're gonna meet the lady who could be carrying our baby.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I can't believe it. When you guys come back, you're gonna have a baby! That is so weird!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 And so incorrect!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 She's only a couple of months pregnant. She liked our application but who knows if she's gonna like us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Come on, she's gonna love you guys!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Uhm, thank you, but we're really trying not to get our hopes up.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 And a lot could still get in our way.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yeah. I mean, this girl could decide against adoption or she could like another couple better..
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 What are you gonna name the baby?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 I can develop a condition in which I talk and talk and no one hears a word.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 But just think, ok? What if everything goes right? What if this woman does pick you guys?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Oh my God. She's gonna pick us!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 So we're standing firm on the 'not getting our hopes up'?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 You know, I know that things could still go wrong but if they don't? If this works out, we're gonna have a baby Chandler, a baby!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yes, but...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Oh my God, it's gonna WORK! We're gonna make it work! I'm gonna be a mummy and  you're gonna be a daddy! All right, I'll see you suckers. I'm gonna get me... A BABY! {she leaves)
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Oh, screw it, I'm gonna be a daddy!!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	  Hey, who's Phoebe with?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I'm gonna say someone I'm gonna have sex with.   Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 So... who's your friend?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Oh, that's Sarah. No, no. Don't you get any ideas, ok? No, I'm not setting you up with any more of my friends!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 OW, why, why, why?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Because you'll date her once, sleep with her and then forget she exists!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh, name one friend of yours that I did that with.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Mandy.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Mandy, uh? Uh... really hot blonde, big boobs?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 No.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I know why I don't remember her, huh? 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Do you think I'm someone else?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Ok, I may not have treated your friends well in the past, but I have grown up a lot, really. Honest, Rach?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Well, believe it or not, it's true. When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. He was thoughtful and mature. And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Growth!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Fine, I'll give you her number.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Ok, thank you. And I promise you I will not forget this one.  Mandy.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 SARAH!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Saraaah.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	  Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Hi!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Hey you guys, I need some fashion advice.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Oh!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	  How does this look?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Well, it's a little low... pick up a little...  a little bit more...  a little bit more...  There you go!  Now throw it away!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 C'mon! This looks good!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Ross, please, trust me. I buy 30 fashion magazines a month. Now, I don't know who's running for president or who that... NATO guy is, but I do know that you have to get as far away as you can from that hat.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Damnit! I have this date tomorrow night and I have to look cool!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Well, you know, if you want fashion help, Rachel and I are going shopping tomorrow. You're more than welcome to come with us, right?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Really? That would be great. I mean, I have to do something, she kinda teased me about how I dress. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I can see why, nice shirt!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 You're wearing the same shirt.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Stupid Gap on every corner!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 Please, make yourself comfortable and I will back in a moment with Erica.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Ok, thank you. Uh, well this is it. Are you OK?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yeah. Just weird, you know. It's like: "Hi, I'm Chandler. May I have the human growing inside you?"
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Uh, we're gonna be great.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You're gonna be great.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Well... obviously!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	  Monica, Chandler. I'd like you to meet Erica.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Hi. It is so, so nice to meet you.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	  Hi...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Thank you so much for agreeing to see us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Hi.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 I'll let you get acquainted.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Ok.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 So, it's Monica and Chandler. I only know you as file 0W33815-D.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 That's what our friends call us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Gosh, you know, you're just such an amazing couple. It's... kind of intimidating.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 I don't know about that.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 You're kidding me? I mean, it's enough that you are a doctor. But on top of it, you're married to a reverend?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	  I don't think that's exactly...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  Let her finish, doctor.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Hey.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Oh, my friend Sarah had a great time last night.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Well...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Yeah! So you're gonna call this one back?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Nope.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 What are you talking about? Sarah's great!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh, really? You know what your great friend did? We're out to dinner, ok?  We're getting along, having a really nice time. I was thinking she was really cool. And then, out of nowhere... 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 That’s it? That’s why you won’t go out with her again? So, she took some fries, big deal!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Hey, hey, look! It’s not about a few fries... it’s about what the fries represent.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 What?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 ALL FOOD!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 I’m sorry, I can’t believe I set you up with such a MONSTER!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Hey, hey, hey, hey. Look. I take a girl out, she can order whatever she wants! The more, the better! All right? Just don’t order a Garden salad and then eat my food! That’s a good way to lose some fingers!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	  Oh
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Hi
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Thank God you’re here. Listen to this!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 what?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Joey and my friend were out last night and having dinner and she reaches over and takes a few of his fries...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Oh! Oh, no!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 What? You know about the plate thing?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Oh, yeah. Joey doesn’t share food. I mean, just last week we were having breakfast and he had a couple of grapes on his plate and ...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	  You wouldn’t let her have a grape?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Oh no! Not me! Emma!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  JOEY DOESN’T SHARE FOOD!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Well, I still think that it’s a stupid reason not to call someone again. You are calling her! And if you need to, just get an extra plate of fries for the table!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  I like that! A sharing buffer! Yeah! I’ll order some extra fries! Maybe a plate of onion rings. Yeah. And a shrimp cocktail. And some buffalo wings. Maybe an individual pizza, uh? And some mozzarella sticks.  What were we talking about?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	  This place is awesome!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 You know, we should just go, I’m not gonna find anything here! This stuff is ridiculous! 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Ah, this place is great!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Wow!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Rach, come on, I’m not gonna wear any of this!  Nothing silver. . Ok? Nothing with hair!  And nothing with padlocks on it! .
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! . I mean, this is just beautiful!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	  Wow, this is really soft . Three hundred and fifty dollars?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Yeah, down from seven hundred, you are saving like two hundred bucks!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Both logic and math are taking a serious hit today.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Hey, check this out! It’s totally you!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Wow!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Yeah!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Actually this looks like pretty good! Yeah! Boys will be boys?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 What? They will be!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 All right, that’s it, I’m getting out of here.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 No, no, no, no! Ross, wait! Come on! You know, there’s other stuff. Here’s a nice shirt, look at these nice pants...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Uh, actually these might look pretty good on me.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Yes, they will! You know what you should do? Just go take a walk, all right? I know your size and I’m... I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Really?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Yes! And I know what looks sexy on guys. Please, just wear what I suggest, and she’s gonna go nuts for you.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 So, you’re saying, uh, if I wear these pants I might be getting into hers?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	  Why do men keep talking to me like this?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 So, the fact that I am a doctor, and my wife’s a reverend, that’s important to you?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Yeah, I read some great applications, but then I thought “who better then a minister to raise a child!”
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Amen.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Plus I thought the baby would be in good hands with a doctor!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Uh, good hands.  Healing hands.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Reverend, can I ask? Does the bible say anything about adoption?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 It says “Do it!”. And behold she did adopt onto them a baby. And it was good.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Wow.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yeah, wow.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 I was wondering you both have such serious jobs.  Would you have time to take care of a baby and your flock?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Oh, you know, my flock is good, I mean, yeah, my flock pretty much takes care of themselves at this point. Good flock. Flock, flock, flock.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	  Being a doctor must take up a lot of time.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 No-ot for me it doesn’t.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 So, how’s everything going in here?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 We’re great, I think I may have asked all my questions.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 Do you have any question for Erica?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yeah, actually. So, you read a file that you liked and you gave the agency the serial number and they contacted us?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 Yes, our system assures total anonimity. We’re very proud of it.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You should be. You’re really on top of stuff..
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	  Well, then if there’s nothing else, then the two of us should talk.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Actually, I don’t think we have to.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 We don’t?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Yeah, when I read about you two, I was pretty sure I wanted you, but I just thought we should meet face to face. . I've made my decision. I choose them.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Oh my God, this is great! This is so great! . Did you hear that?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Yeah, I did.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  Hey, thank you. Thank you so much. . You are SO going to Heaven!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 We got some really great stuff!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah but I am not sure about some of the bra's I got.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	 Oh! Really? Do you wanna try some of them on for me? 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 Oh! okay. Wait, are we in Joey's imagination?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Rachel	  Oh no! I took one of Ross' bags by 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Phoebe	 oh, well, Ross probably has it, you can get it from him later.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	  So? What do you think? 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I think were not wearing the same shirt anymore!!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	  Yeah! Yeah! Rachel picked it out for me. She told me to trust her and you know what? I'm glad I did! I turned quite a few heads on my way over here.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Dude, I really don't think you should be wearing that.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Oh, I see, somebody is afraid of a little competition with the ladies?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Looks like someone IS the ladies!!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 You're just jealous because you couldn't pull this off. Yeah, now if you'll excuse me  I have a date.  See?  ALL eyes on ME!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 We are NOT signing those papers.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Why not?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 It's wrong. They made a mistake. They think we're somebody else.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 God works in mysterious ways.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You have gotta stop!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 But she liked us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 She likes Doctor Chandler and Reverend Monica.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Well, if you think about it, I am kind of like a Reverend. I mean, as a chef, I serve God, by feeing the hungry and poor. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Your Veal Chop is $34,95!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 C'mon Chandler, I think we have been given an opportunity. I mean, the mistake has already been made. They are writing up the paper right now.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 But we are not the one she chose! How can you feel okay about this?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  Because... We may not be who she thinks we are but no-one will ever love that baby more than us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 I know..
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 I mean, who knows how long it's gonna take for someone else to give us a baby? What if, what if no one ever picks us?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 oh, honey..
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  Please.. please, we are so close.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Monica, I want a baby too, but this woman is giving away her child. She deserves to know who it's going to. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  okay, right. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 So, we'll tell the truth and who knows, maybe she'll like us for us.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  Maybe she will. Uh! Why couldn't I have been a Reverend?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You're Jewish.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Technicality!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Waiter	 A garden salad for the lady 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh, that looks great! Good ordering!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Waiter	 Seafood platter for the gentleman and extra fries. Enjoy!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Mmmh, those fries look delicious.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 oh, I didn't know you liked French fries. Help yourself! What's mine is yours. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	  Oh wow, are those stuffed clams?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Uuuh.. yes, they are my stuffed clams.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 How about those fries though, huh? 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 They are delicious 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  You are beautiful, you know that?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Oh, that is so sweet..
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh  okay.. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  NOW look what you did!!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 What? what is the matter with you?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I don't like it when people take food off of my plate, okay?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 But you just said "What's mine is yours"?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 WELL, I DIDN'T MEAN IT!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Fine, I'm sorry, I didn't think it was that big a deal.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I'm sorry, I'm overreacting. Okay, It's just when it comes to food, I have certain rules, okay, I mean  There are things you do..and you now, things..  that you don't do . 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Girl	 Wow, this place looks great.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Oh! You are gonna love it!  and I'm so glad, we're finally doing this.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Girl	 Me too! 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Here  So this was fun! 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I really am sorry about, you know..before. I just want to make sure you know that I really do like you.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Sure  Just not as much as clams.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Well, stuffed clams.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Waiter	 Chocolate Torte for the lady, cheesecake for the gentleman.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Uh, excuse me sir, there seems to be some sort of red crap on my cheesecake.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Waiter	 Yes, that's Raspberry coule.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  So stupid, ordering cheesecake, trying to 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	  Oh my God! 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh, all right, I'll just have what she's having instead.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Waiter	 Oh, I'm sorry sir, that was our last piece.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Mmmm! Mmm!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Oh, no! This is work. I should call in. Can you excuse me?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh yeah, sure. No problem.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 What are you doing? I thought you don't share food.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Sure I do.  Coule?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	  No. If I can't have your clams, you can't have my dessert. This is a two way street.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Really?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Sarah	 Really! Now this all better be here when I come back. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Yeah, of course. I can control myself. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  Stop staring at me!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Why, just a tiny little...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Oh-oh!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 I'm not even sorry.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Hi!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Adoption Agency Guy	 Hey.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Hey.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 So, these are the preliminary forms for an open adoption. There's a lot to go over, but I'll explain everything as we go through it.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	  I-Is... Is that a picture?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Yeah. It's a sonogram they took of the baby last week. I thought you might want to see it. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Look, doctor!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 I don't understand.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 The agency must have made some mistake. My wife is not a reverend and I'm not a doctor.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 What?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 That's impossible.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 I could perform an operation on you and prove it if you'd like.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Agency Guy	 I'll go check your file. Excuse me.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 So who are you?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Well, our names really are Monica and Chandler. We're from New York.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Yeah, but the important thing to know about us, is how much we would care for this little baby. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 So you lied to me before?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Well, we...  "bore false witness"... See I could be a reverend.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 I can't believe this. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 But we were hoping that since we told you the truth that you still might consider...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Giving you my baby? You think I'd give you my child after this?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 Well, you don't have to decide right now, but if you could just look at our file...
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 I don't want to look at your file! This is over.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Erica wait!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 I've nothing to say to you. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You have every reason to be upset. We did lie. But only because we've been waiting and trying to have a baby for so long. Now we don't know how long it's gonna be before we can get another chance again.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Why don't you ask the reverend to pray on it?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 Erica, please. Just consider us. Ask them to see our file. Our last name's Bing. My wife's a chef and I'm in advertising.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Erica	 Oh yeah. I actually liked you guys. But it doesn't matter, because what you did was wrong. 
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 But you did like us. And you should. My wife's an incredible woman. She's loving and devoted and caring. And don't tell her I said this but the woman's always right... I love my wife more than anything in this world. And I... It kills me that I can't give her a baby... I really want a kid. And when that day finally comes, I'll learn how to be a good dad. But my wife... she's already there. She's a mother... without a baby... Please?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Chandler	 You still want that baby?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Monica	 God bless you Chandler Bing!
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Turns out this sweater is made for a woman.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  So, why are you still wearing it?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Because it's soft... Hey, so how was your date?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Ooh... Not so good.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Ross	 Well, looks like it's just the two of us tonight, huh old buddy?
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	 Yeah, and you know what? We could do a lot worse.
10	09	1009	The One With The Birth Mother	Joey	  JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Mmh... this cake is amazing!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 My God, get a room!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I would get a room with this cake. I think I could show this cake a good time!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 If you had to, what would you give up, food or sex?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Sex!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  Seriously, answer faster!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Oh, I'm sorry honey, you know, but when she said "sex" I wasn't thinking about "sex with you"!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  It's like a giant hug.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Ross, how about you. What would you give up, sex or food?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Food.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Ok, how about... uhm... sex or dinosaurs?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Oh my God. It's like Sophie's Choice.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh God. What about you, Joe? What would you give up, sex or food?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Uhm... oh... I don't know, it's too hard.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 No, you gotta pick one!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Oh... food. No, sex. Food! Sex! Food! Se-I don't know! Good God, I don't know, I want girls on bread!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 You gotta see these latest pictures of Emma.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh, how cute!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh, she looks just like a little doll!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh, no, no. That is a doll.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh, thank God, 'cause that thing's really creepy!  Look, there's Chandler. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh. Who is the blonde, she's pretty.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 OH! He's having an affair.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 He's not having an affair!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 You know, I'm always right about these things.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 No, you're not! Last week you thought Ross was trying to kill you!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Well, I'm sorry but it's hard to believe that anyone would tell a story that dull just to tell it!  See, there's something going on with them. Look, he's getting into the car with her!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh, that doesn't mean anything.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh yeah? Well, let's see.  Ok, duck down.  
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  Hello.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh, hi Chandler. It's Phoebe. Uhm... I know that Monica is working today so... ...I was wondering if you want to come to the movies with me and Rachel.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Oh, uhm... I have to work too. Yeah, I'm stuck at the office all day.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  Oh, well, it's a shame that you-that you miss the movie 'cause we were gonna see, you know, either "Liar, Liar" or "Betrayal", or... "An Affair To Remember".
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Those are all really old!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Ok, then maybe it'll be, uhm...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	  "Dude, Where's My Car?" 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 They're in a caaar...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  Okay, we-we'll talk to you later. Okay, bye. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Geez!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Ok. Quick. We gotta find a cab and follow them.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh, yeah, ok. Let me just grab my night vision goggles and my stun gun.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  I got them!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Hi!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Hey! You smell like perfume and cigarettes. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I was in the car with Nancy all day.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Nancy doesn’t smoke!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Well, at least the perfume is not mine, be thankful for that!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 So? What do you think of the house?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 It’s perfect. It’s everything we’ve been looking for.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Isn’t it? Then what about the amazing wainscotting and the crown molding and the dormer windows in the attic? 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 And the wiggle wharms and the zip zorps?  What were the things you said?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Don’t you love the huge yard?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 And the fireplace in the bedroom.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And Nancy said that it's really under price, because the guy lost his job and has to move in with his parents!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 This is bringing out a lovely color in you!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 So? Do you think we should get it?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I don’t know. What do you think?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I think we should.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I do too.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 This is huge!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I know.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 How bad you wanna smoke, right now.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I don’t know what you mean, giant talking cigarette! Oh, by the way, Phoebe called just as I was getting into Nancy’s car, so if she asks you, I was at work all day.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Gotcha. When do we tell them about this?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 We don’t. Not until it's a hundred percent. I mean, why upset everybody over nothing.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Okay. Right. Oh my God that is gonna be so hard.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I know. Gooooood luck with it.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 I just can’t see Chandler cheating!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 I’m telling you guys, we followed them out to a house in Westchester, the went in for like forty-five minutes and then they came out looking pretty happy!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Chandler? Forty-five minutes? Well, something is not right. I just can’t believe he would do this to Monica!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 I know, and with the baby coming?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 So, should we tell her?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 I don’t know. Phoebe, if one of us saw Mike with another woman would you want us to tell you?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Why? Who’d you seen him with?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 No one, I’m just saying if... 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  I know nothing! Mike’s a great guy, it was hypothetical!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 All right. . He is a good guy. You’re right, he wouldn’t cheat.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Believe me, if I did see with someone, there’s no way I... 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 WHO DID YOU SEE HIM WITH?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh, look at her, so happy!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 If only there were a smaller one to clean this one!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Hey, is uhm... is Chandler here?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 No, he’s picking up dinner, why, what’s up?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Well, look, whatever happens, we’re here for you and we love you.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 All right...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 We think Chandler might be having an affair.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 They went in together. So sorry.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Oh my God! Oh my God that’s awful! What did you think of the house?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  Monica, you understand what we are saying, right?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Yeah, sure... uhm, I'm devastated, obviously...  Did you think the neighborhood was homey? 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Hey!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  You son of a bitch!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Is it me, or have the greetings gone downhill around here?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Phoebe and Rachel saw you with Nancy today and... em... they think you're having an affair.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Who's Nancy?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 What's going on?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Ok, alright, you guys, you'd better sit down, this is pretty big.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Yeah  I'm not having an affair. Nancy is our realtor.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 I knew he couldn't be with a woman for 45 minutes!!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Why do you have a realtor?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Uhm, she has been showing us houses outside of the city.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Are you serious?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 When we found out that we're gonna get this baby, Chandler and I started talking and we decided that we didn't want to raise a kid in the city.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 So you're gonna move?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Oh my God.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Shouldn't we all vote on stuff like this?!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 What is wrong with raising a kid in the city? I'm doing it, Ross is doing it, Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And that's great for you guys, but we want a lawn and a swingset...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 ...and a street where our kids can ride their bikes and maybe an ice-cream truck can go by.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  So you wanna buy a house in the 50's?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Have you thought about what you would be giving up? You can't move out of the city, what if you want Chinese food at 5am? Or a fake Rolex that breaks as soon as it rains or an Asian hooker sent right to your door?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 You know what, if you wanna look for a house, that's okay.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 No, no, it's not, don't listen to him!  I'm gonna thump you! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  It's ok, because they have to get it out of their system, okay , but you're going to realize, this is the only place, you wanna be.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Actually, we already found a house we love.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And about an hour ago, we made an offer.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Bet you wish I was having an affair now, huh?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 You put an offer on a house? 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  It's so sweet. It really is. It has this big yard that leads down to this stream and then there's these old maple trees... 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Wha..? Again with the nature, what are you? Beavers?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I know this is really hard and we're really sorry.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Is this because I come over here without knocking and eat your food?  Because I can stop doing that,  I really, really think I can! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  You know that's not the reason Joe. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 We think if you saw it, you'd understand. I mean you guys were there.  It is beautiful, isn't it?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Yeah it is.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 What the hell are you doin'?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Well, it is, all right? When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Yeah, but so is this.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Yeah, I mean, if you moved there, you have to leave here. I mean, how can you leave this place?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	  C'mon Daddy, listen to me! All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? What if I wanna be a- a purse, y'know? Or a- or a hat! No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha- It's a metaphor, Daddy!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 You can see where he'd have trouble.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Well, I guess we've established who's staying here with Monica...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 That money is mine, Green!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 You're fly is open, Geller!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker' with a 'J.' Coincidence?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Hey, that's...'joincidence' with a 'C'!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  Eww, look. Ugly Naked Guy lit a bunch of candles.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Ow, that had to hurt!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Hey, it’s your Thanksgiving too, y'know, instead of watching football, you could help.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	The Guys	 We will. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Okay, Rachel, you wanna put the marshmallows in concentric circles.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. I want to do this. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Every year.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  It's stuck!!!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  Easy. Step. How did it get on?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 I put it on to scare Chandler!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh my God! Monica's gonna totally freak out!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 It smells really bad in here.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Well, of course it smells really bad. You have your head inside a turkey's ass!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Hey, did you get the turkey bast-Oh my God! Oh my God!  Who is that?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 It's Joey.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I got it! How about, if we win, they have to get rid of the rooster?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oooohh that’s interesting.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 If you win, we give up the birds.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  Dah!! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 But if we win, we get your apartment.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Oooooh!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Deal!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 What was Monica’s nickname when she was a field hockey goalie?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Big fat goalie.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Correct. Rachel claims this is her favorite movie…
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Dangerous Liaisons.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Correct. Her actual favorite movie is...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Weekend at Bernie’s.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Monica categorizes her towels. How many categories are there?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Everyday use.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Fancy.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Guest.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Fancy guest.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Two seconds...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Uhh, 11!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 11, unbelievable, 11 is correct.  
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  Chandler was how old when he first touched a girl’s breast?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 14?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 No, 19.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Thanks man.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Joey had an imaginary childhood friend. His name was?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Maurice.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Correct, his profession was?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Space cowboy!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Correct! What is Chandler Bing’s job?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Ow...Oh Gosh!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 10 seconds, you need this or you lose the game.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 It’s umm, it has something to do with transponding.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Oh-oh-oh, he’s a transponce—transpondster!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 That’s not even a word!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Y’know what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Hey, don’t get mad at us! No one forced you to raise the stakes!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 That is not true. She did! She forced me!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Hey, we would still be living here if hadn’t gotten the question wrong!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Well it stupid, unfair question!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Don’t blame the questions!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Would you all stop yelling in our apartment! You are ruining moving day for us!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Chandler!!! Chandler!!!  Chandler, I saw what you were doing through the window! Chandler, I saw what you were doing to my sister! Now get out here!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  Wow! Listen, we had a good run. You know, what was it? Four? Five months? I mean, that's more than most people have in a lifetime! So, good-bye, take care, bye-bye then! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Hey Ross. What's up bro?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 What the hell are doing?!!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	  Hey, what's-what's going on?!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Well, I think, I think Ross knows about me and Monica.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  Dude! He's right there!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  I thought you were my best friend, this is my sister! My best friend and my sister! I-I cannot believe this!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Look, we're not just messing around! I love her. Okay, I'm in love with her.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I'm so sorry that you had to find out this way. I'm sorry, but iit-t's true, I love him too.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	  My best friend and my sister! I cannot believe this.  
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Well, this is the last box of your clothes. I’m just gonna label it, "What were you thinking?"
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that on Chandler.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Ok, you guys, I don’t mean to make things worse, but umm, I don’t want to live with Rachel anymore.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica, Rachel	 What?!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 You’re just so mean to each other! And I don’t want to end up like that with Rachel. I still like you!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Whoa-whoa-whoa, Phoebe you gotta take her! Y’know, I-I-I said some really bad stuff about her, but y’know Rachel has some good qualities that make her a good roommate. She gets tons of catalogs and umm, she’ll fold down the pages of the things she thinks that I’d like.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 What else?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 When I take a shower, she leaves me little notes on the mirror.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Yeah, I do. I-I do, do that.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 That’s nice. I like having things to read in the bathroom.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 When I fall asleep on the couch after reading, she covers me over with a blanket.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Well y’know, I don’t want you to be cold.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And when I told her that I was gonna be moving in with Chandler, she was really supportive.   You were so great. You made it so easy. And now you have to leave. And I have to live with a boy!! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  Hey.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 She really left.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I know. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Thank you.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 No problem roomie. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Can I ask you a question?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Sure!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 What the hell is that dog doing here?! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Little toast here. I know this isn't exactly the kind of Thanksgiving that all of you all planned, but for me, this has been really great, you know, I think because it didn't involve divorce or projectile vomiting. Anyway, I was just thinking, I mean, if you'd gone to Vail, and if you guys'd been with your family, if you didn't have syphilis and stuff, we wouldn't be all together, you know? So I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm very thankful that all of your Thanksgivings sucked.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	All	 That's so sweet.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 And hey, here's to a lousy Christmas.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 And a crappy New Year.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Here, here!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 You can't move. You just... you just can't.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 Rachel's right. This is where you guys belong. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Yeah, you don't wanna live in Westchester. That's like the worst of the Chesters.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 You know, sometimes when I'm alone in my apartment, I look over here and you guys... are just having dinner or... watching TV or something, but... it makes me feel better. And now when I look over, who am I gonna see? The Gottliebs, the Yangs? They don't make me feel so good. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Yeah. So don't move, okay? Just stay here and...  maybe close your blinds at night.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Hello? It's Nancy, they responded to our offer.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	  Okay, thanks...  They passed. They said they wouldn't go a penny under the asking price.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 We can't afford that.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I know.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Well, there you go.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 I'm really sorry you guys.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Yeah. I'm sorry too. I'm even more sorry that that phone call didn't come before I told you about looking through the window.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Yeah, we're gonna let you be alone.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	  You're gonna be okay?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Yeah, we'll be okay.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Love you guys. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 You know, I'm really sorry I wasn't more supportive before.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 That's okay, we understand.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 And about this Nancy thing... If you're not sleeping with her, should I?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I know there'll be other houses, but it's just so... I love that one so much.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Yeah... Well, it's a good thing we got it then.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 What?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 We got the house.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Oh my God!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 I just didn't want to tell you in front of them.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Oh my God! My God! We've got the house !?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 We're getting the house.  We're getting the house.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 And a baby...
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 We're growing up.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 We sure are.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 So who's gonna tell them?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	  Not it!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Not it! Damn it!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Rachel, this is yours.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Aah! Why? What are these for?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 You'll see.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 All right, everybody open them!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Rachel	 Ooh! Oh wow this is so beautiful. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Phoebe	 Oh! These are the ones I was looking at in the store. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 I know.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 I love this. 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	 A meatball Sub? Thanks! 
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Ross	 Seriously you guys, what's going on? What are these for?
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Chandler	 Well, I didn't know how to tell you before, but... We got the house.
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Monica	 Enjoy!
10	10	1010	The One Where Chandler Gets Caught	Joey	  What did they say?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Hey guys!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Hey, let me tell them!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Sure.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Joey is gonna be a celebrity guest on a game show!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Great!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Really? Which one?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	  Ohh! Fish, seaweed, a sunken ship.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Things you find in the ocean,  You're gonna be on "Pyramid"!!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh, that was our favourite game show ever!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Except for "Match game"...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Or "Win, Lose or Draw".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 What did I marry into?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Would you guys want to come down tomorrow and watch me tape the show?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh, I can't. We're throwing Phoebe a bachelorette party.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Yeah, sorry boys, this ride's closing.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Oh, and Chandler and I have this stupid college alumni thing. I can't believe you get to meet Donny Osmond.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Seriously?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  Yeah-uh!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Ross and I always wanted to be Donny and Marie.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 You guys just keep getting cooler and cooler!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Yeah, we used to perform for our family and friends.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Oh God, that's right. I blocked that out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	  "I'm a little bit country"...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  "...and I'm a little bit rock 'n' roll"!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  I'm leaving you.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 So weird to see all these people again... Oh my God, look, there's Geoffrey Cleric.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Who?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 He was roommates with John Rosoff. He went out with Andrea Tamburino. She dumped him for Michael Skloff.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Did I go to this school?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Hey, there's Missy Goldberg. You gotta remember her.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Sure, nice.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Dude. You're married to my sister. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 You're right, by saying "nice" I'm virtually licking her.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Hey, I hear she's single again, d'you think I should ask her out?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Are you asking permission to break the pact?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Yes please.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Hey. Hey, check out the flyers for the band. I made 'em on a Macintosh in the computer room!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Awesome, the name really stands out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Thanks to a little something called "Helvetica Bold 24 point"!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Man, we're gonna rock that Asian student union!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Hey guys!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Hey!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Hey, Missy...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 You know, our band is playing on Friday.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Yeah, yeah. You should come check us out. We're called "Way! No Way!".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 No way!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler, Ross	 Way!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Right. I'll be there. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Fresh!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Boss!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Mint!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 She's gone.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 I know it. You know, I'm totally gonna ask her out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Dude, I was gonna ask her out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 I said it first, bro.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Well, I thought it first, Holmes.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Look, if you did...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Woha! Wait... What are we doing? What we have is too important to mess it up over some girl. I mean, we can get laid anytime we want.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Totally. I had sex in High school...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Me too. I'm good at it.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 All right, I'd say we make a pact. Neither of us will go out with Missy Goldberg.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 You got it.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 All right, so that's Missy Goldberg, Phoebe Cates and Molly Ringwald, who neither of us can go out with.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Those are the pacts!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Oh, and Sheena Easton. But we probably couldn't get her anyway.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Oh, oh... maybe not you!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Well, I officially give you permission to break the pact.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Thank you.  All right, here I go. Hey, remember how scary it used to be going up to girls in college?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Your hands are shaking.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 I know, and I can't stop sweating. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Voice	 Five! Four! Three! Applause!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny Osmond	 Yeah! Welcome, it is Soap Opera week here on Pyramid, let's meet our contestants. First, Gene Lester is a database specialist, he's gonna be playing with "Days of Our Life's" star Joey Tribbiani! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  I know it could be intimidating for regular people to be around celebrities but... relax, I'm just like you!  Only better looking and richer.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 ...should be playing with the star of "General Hospital" Leslie Charleson.  Welcome everybody. Good luck to all of you. Let's play Pyramid. All right? Now... we flipped a coin before the show, Gene, you won the toss, so you're gonna start. Which category would you like?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 I'll take "You crossed the line".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 You crossed the line. Joey, describe for Gene these things that have lines. Give me 20 seconds on the clock, please. Ready, go!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  Uhm... ok. It's a store, like a supermarket.  Oh! I see-I see what I did. Yeah, ok, ok, uhm... I'm writing in my...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Diary.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Noo,  more like a notebook... Damn it!  Oh, if I'm building an house, the plan isn't called the 'shmoo-print'... Can't say that either? Woha... hey...  In high school, I once had sex with a girl right in the middle of the...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Cafeteria.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Yeah! But that is not what they're looking for.  OOOH!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	  Thank you so much for this.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Oh, d'you like it? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh my God, it's all so elegant! When's the dirty stuff starting?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 What?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 You know, the strippers, and the guys dancing, and you know, pee-pee's flying about.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Pheebs, I... there isn't gonna be any flying about! We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh, ok. I see what you're doing, that's fine. This is all there is, just tea, uh, ok.  Hmmmm... raunchy!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Really? So this is... this is my big send off in the married life? Rachel this is the only bachelorette party I'm ever gonna have! I've got a big wad of ones in my purse! Really? I mean, really? It's just tea? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Nooo! Phoebe, of course there is more! I mean, I'll just go and talk to Monica and get an ETA on the pee-pee's!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Now Gene I must remind you, you need all six of these to stay in the game, all right? Describe for Joey things you find in your refrigerator.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Ahaha, he might as well just give us the points.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Give me twenty seconds on the clock. Ready? Go!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 You put this in your coffee.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 A spoon. Your hands. Your face!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 It's white!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Paper, snow, a ghost! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 It's heavier then milk!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 A rock, a dog, the earth.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Pass! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 You put this on a sandwich.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Salami, anchovies, jam!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 It's white!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Paper, snow, a ghost!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 It's made from eggs!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Chickens?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Pass!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 You put this on a hamburger!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Ketchup!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Yes!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Relish!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Stop!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Oh, time's up! Joey! You were, uh, almost on a roll there...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Yeah...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Uh, Gene, you're gonna have a chance to go to the winner circle in the second half. But right now Henrietta you are going to the winner circle to try your luck for ten thousand dollars, right after this, don't go away.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Stage Manager	 And we're out!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, so we didn't win, but it's fun to play the game, right?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Hey! I got a kid starting college. I've to get surgery on my knee, you just lost me ten grand!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, wow! I'm so sorry, ok? I promise, we'll do better next time!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Well, I will, because I won't be playing with you.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Hey, you know, some of those are pretty hard! Like why would there be a ghost in my fridge? . Yeah!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 So, Saturday night!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 I'd love to!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Great!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 So how come it took you so long to ask me out?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Oh, well, uh, this is gonna sound kinda silly, but, do you remember my roommate Chandler Bing?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Sure, he was in your "band"? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 It's been sixteen years but the air quotes still hurt.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Sorry.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 That's ok. Uh, anyway, well he and I both really liked you a lot, uhm, but we didn't want anything to jeopardize our friendship, so we kinda made a pact, that neither of us could ask you out!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Really?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Yeah, why?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Well, Chandler and I used to make out! A lot!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 You did?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Missy	 Yeah. We'd go to the science lab after hours!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  AND ON MY TURF?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	  Hey, where is this guy, it's been over an hour!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Who is it?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Man	 It's the police!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  Uh! The police!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	  Oh!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Man	 That's right, it's officer Goodbody.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 What's the matter, officer? Has someone been bad? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy, The Male Stripper	  Whoo, that's a lot of stairs!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Ooh, boy. You should warn people there's no elevator! I should not have had that Mexican food for lunch.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Are you gonna be ok, officer, uhm,...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Goodbody!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 ...If-you-say-so. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 So where's the young lady who I'm supposed to take  downtown! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh, God!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 All right, somebody show me where to plug in my box, and we'll get this party started!  Whaaaa...  Here? All right.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Rachel?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Yeah?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Are you kidding?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 How old is your phonebook?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh my God, this man is gonna get naked in my apartment!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh God no, I don't wanna see him take his clothes off!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Are you talking about me?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh, no! I mean, obviously we want to see you take your clothes off! You big piece of eye candy!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Ok, ok, ladies! Can I have your attention, please?  Did someone call for the long arm of the law?  I should warn you, I have a concealed weapon!  I hope you're familiar with the States penal code, ok, ok, enough teasing. Now for some pleasing!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Whoa, whoa, whoa . She cringed!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 This is how I look when I'm turned on!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 You were talking about me before! Look, I don't need this! I'm outta here! Where's my hat?  Look, I've been in this business for a long time!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Shocking!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Now if you just pay me my three hundred dollars, I'll be on my way!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Three hundred dollars, are you kidding?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 No, you're not gonna pay him, he didn't do anything!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Didn't do anything? I took a bus all the way from Hoboken. I climbed ... I dunno... like a billion stairs... It's not like I can take them two at a time! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 I don't care. We're not paying you 300 dollars for this.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Well, look - it's not my fault if you're too uptight to appreciate the male form in all it's glory.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh yeah, okay. I'm uptight. Yeah, that's why I don't want to watch a middle aged guy dance around in what I can only assume is a child halloween costume! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 I may have borrowed this from my nephew, but let me assure you, what's underneath ... is all man.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 I'm sorry, did you say all man or old man?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	  Oh, you're mean!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	  Uh, look, officer... uhm Sir...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Damnit. OH!  Big surprise! The hunk of beef has feelings!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Ok Henrietta, you've picked Jack and Jill went up the hill.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  My friend Rachel has a kid. I totally know nursery rhymes! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Joey describe these things associated with the United States congress.  Give me 20 seconds on the clock please. Ready? Go!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, .. uh... uh... pass.  Pass.  Pass.   Okay, the little thing that hangs down at the back of your throat.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Henrietta	 Uvula!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, then pass. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 O-kay... Henrietta, you didn't get all the points you needed, so that means Gene, you are going to the winners circle to try for ten thousand dollars!  And you're gonna be going there with Joey Tribbiani 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  You made out with Missy Goldberg. How could you do that, after you promised me?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Excuse me. . That didn't make us sound gay at all!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 You broke the pact! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Ross, that was 16 years ago!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 That doesn't matter! We're talking about the foundation of our friendship.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 I believe the foundation of our friendship was unfortunate hair.  All right, look, if we're really gonna do this... it's not like you never broke one of the pacts.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 I didn't.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Oh really?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 No.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Oh really!?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 NO!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 ADRIENNE TURNER!! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Adrienne	 Yes?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler, Ross	 Hey! Hey Adrienne. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 I never did anything with Adrienne Turner.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Oh please, and you knew how much I liked her.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 I don't know what... you're talking about.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Really?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Present Chandler'S Voice	 Remember that big party? Freshman year? A week before Christmas vacation? I do. You had some visitors.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 I can't believe we are at a real college party!  I have to pee so bad!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 This is so awesome! College guys are so cute!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Hey, you've got a boyfriend!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 I know. But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Look, there's Chandler. You knew, that stupid friend of Ross'. Said I'm fat. You know I've already lost 4 pounds!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 It... You can so totally tell. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 I KNOW!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Well lets see. Maybe he knows where Ross is.  Hey, how's it going .
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Aren't you...?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Yeah, Rachel. And this  is Ross' sister, Monica. We met at Thanksgiving. .
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Right.  So how're you doing? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Bitchin'
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Hi Monica.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Hi Chandler. It's really nice to see you  NOT. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 O-kay. I'll see if I can find Ross. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh my God Rach. Bean bag chairs.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Oh.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Do NOT let me sit in one of those. We'll be here for days.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Listen Adrienne, you can't tell Chandler about this.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Adrienne	 Oh believe me, Ross, I won't be telling anybody about this.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Cool! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 I didn't know you knew about that.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Well, I did and it hurt.  That's when I wrote the song: "Betrayal In The Common Room".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  Man... I... I'm sorry.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Look  it was a lo-o-ong time ago.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 So, eh. I made out with Adrienne and you made out with Missy. Well I guess we're even.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Hmm mmmhm..
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 We are even, right?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	  Just one more thing. I was so pissed at you that night that I wanted to get back at you. So I thought, who does Ross like the more than anybody?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  What did you do to my mom?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Not her!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 I am sooo drunk.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 That's weird. I've had the same number of beers as you and I don't feel anything at all. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Soo... you girls having fun?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 For your information, ass munch, I've lost four pounds. Maybe even five with all the dancing. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Pizza Guy	 SOMEBODY ORDER A PIZZA?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh THATS ME! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Well maybe if you go to school here next year we can totally hang out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  Oh yeah. There is a plan! Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Well, maybe you can get in on a beauty scholarship.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  Oh, what a line. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 So where are you applying to? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of...   Hey!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 I'm in college and I'm in a band. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  Yeah okay. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 What's the matter? You never saw a 50 year old stripper cry before?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 You know, it's fine. We'll pay you.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 No, no, you're right. Who am I kidding? I should have hung up that breakaway jockstrap years ago. What am I gonna do? I mean, this has been my life for thirty two years. Taking my clothes off in front of people is all I know.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 No, wait. No there's gotta be something else that you can do. I mean, what skills do you have?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 I don't know... I can make my pecs dance... I can pick up a dollar bill with my butt cheeks... I can go to that special place inside me where I feel no shame.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	 So maybe something in an office.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Or you could teach stripping. You know, share your gift, pass the torch.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 You know, actually that's not a bad idea. I can do it out of my apartment. I don't think my mom would mind.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 There you go. Okay, do you think you're gonna be okay?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Yeah, yeah, yeah... This is so weird. I mean, you never know when it's gonna be your last dance. And I didn't even get a chance to finish it.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	  Finish it!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 What?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Your last dance. Do it for us.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Really?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Rachel	  Really?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah. He deserves to do the thing he loves one last time. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	 Okay, all right... Get ready ladies!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh this is so ho-o-ot!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Phoebe	 Oh no, no, no, don't stop!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Roy	  Have to...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Well, welcome to the Winner Circle. Joey and Gene, you guys ready?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  Yeah...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	  Sure. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Donny	 Okay. Give me sixty seconds on the clock please... Ready, GO! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Oak, maple, elm, birch...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 I-I-I don't know. Types of trees?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Uhm... Buenos días, enchilada, por favor...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  Oh, I'm so sorry. I don't know any Spanish words.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 A match, a candle...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Things that go "tssst" when you put them out.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 A torch, a bonfire...  uhm, your pee...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Things that burn.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 "I'd like to go for a walk", uhm "scratch my belly".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Dude, dude! I think you're losing it.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Uhm, "I have fur", "I like to bark".
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, oh, oh... What a dog says.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Pepperoni...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	  Pizza toppings, next!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Cindy Crawford, Christie Brinkley, Heidi Klum, Claudia Schiffer...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Oh, oh, oh... 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	 Christie Turlington, Kate Moss...
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Girls Chandler could never get?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Gene	  Supermodels!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Joey	 Where? 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Hey, where's Rachel?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 She and Phoebe took the stripper to the hospital.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 What? When was this?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Nineteen Eighty Seven. The weekend you guys visited me at school.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh my God! That's wild!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Well, it matters to me.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Why?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Because... the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for the very first time.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 You kissed her that night too?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Two guys in one night? Wow, I thought she became a slut after she got her nose fixed.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Seriously, where did this happen?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room, I went in there to make sure she was all right. She was lying on my bed, all buried in peoples coats. Well, I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know. But it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips. I started to pull away, but then I felt her start to kiss me back. It was only for a second, but... it was amazing. And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Oh wait... What bed did you say she was on?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Mine.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 No, she was definitely on my bed. 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 Why would I kiss a girl, and then put her on your bed?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 Well, then who was on my bed?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	  OH! Oh, oh! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	  NO! No, no!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 YES! 
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 You were under the pile of coats?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 I was the pile of coats!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 OH MY GOD!
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 You were my Midnight Mystery Kisser?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Ross	 You were my first kiss with Rachel?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 You were my first kiss ever?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Chandler	 What did I marry into?
10	11	1011	The One Where The Stripper Cries	Monica	 Oh, crap!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, hey Joey.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Uh, hey.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Listen, I need to ask you something. Ok, you know how my step dad's in prison.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  Yeah.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah. Well, uhm... listen he was supposed to get a weekend furlough, so he'd come to the wedding tomorrow, but he just called and... uhm... well, apparently stabbing Iceman in the exercise yard just couldn't wait till Monday.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 So he can't come?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 No, and so there's no one to walk me down the aisle and... well, I would just really love it if you would do it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Seriously? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Yeah, you've... you know, sort of been like a dad to me. I mean, you've always, you know, looked out for me and shared your wisdom...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I am pretty wisdomous.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 So... what do you say?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Are you kidding? Phoebe, I would be honored. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, thank you. I hope... I hope you know how much you mean to me.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  Listen, I hope... that you know...  I don't want you to see your father cry, GO TO YOUR ROOM!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh no, no, no, let your dad get this.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Oh, it's my wedding planner. She's driving me crazy!  Hello... Hey, ok, stop screaming! Ok? So, halibut. All right, so salmon, either way. I don't-I don't... it doesn't matter to me! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Well, it matters to me!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Well, I don't care, so you pick!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Did you just hung up on me?  All right, look, I need you at the rehearsal dinner tonight at 1800 hours.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Uh-uh. Ok. What time is that.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 You don't know military time?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Why, I must have been in missile training the day they taught that.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Just subtract twelve.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Ok, so... 1800 minus twelve is... one thousand, seven hundred and...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Six o'clock!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Ok.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ok. Hold on.  Geller here! No! I said it has to be there by 4 o'clock. Goodbye.  Oh, how hard it is to make an ice sculpture?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Ice sculpture? That sounds really fancy! I told you I just want a simple wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Please... honey, leave the details to me. Now I wanna make this day as special for you as I can. Now, ok, I was thinking that the harpist should wear white.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 What harpist? My friend Marjorie is playing the steel drums.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ooh... she backed out.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 She did? Why?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 I made her.  Steel drums don't really say "elegant wedding". Nor does Marjorie's overwhelming scent.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Hey! She will shower when Tibet is free.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Hey!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 You look great. I'm so glad we're having this rehearsal dinner, you know, I so rarely get to practice my meals before I eat them. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Okay, what did we say was your one gift to us?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 No stupid jokes. I thought that was for the actual wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Rehearse it!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Hi! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Thanks for coming you guys.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Oh,  hey, oh... I... I was-I was going for a hand shake.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Is that why your hand is pressed against my crotch?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 That is why!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Yeah.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 So Rach.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Where is Emma?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. Apparently babies and weddings don't mix.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Are you still crying about your damn baby? Pheebs, you gotta keep the line moving, remember, 20 seconds per person. Your see these clowns all the time! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Hey, you're Mike's parents, right?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Mother	 Yes, we are.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Ah, our little ones are growing up fast, uh?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Father	 How's that?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 You know, on the one hand you're happy for them, but on the other hand it's hard to let go.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Father	 Who in God's name are you?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Hey, I'm not that fond of you either, ok buddy? But I'm just trying to be nice for the kids!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  You know what I just realized? We have no idea what we're doing in the wedding tomorrow.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Yeah, I thought we'd be groomsmen, but wouldn't they have asked us by now? When did they ask you to be their bridesmaid?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Uh... November?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I wanna say it's not looking good.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Hey Pheebs...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 What's up?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Uhm... you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Heh.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Uhm... well, they're not in the wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 What? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Well, this is really awkward  Oh, and I can leave!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I'm sorry you guys but, you know, Mike's got his brother and his friends from school so... you know, you were-you were... if it helps you, you were next in line, you just-you just missed the cut.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Oh, man!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 This is like figure skating team all over again.  I mean synchronized swimming.  I mean- I mean the balance beam.  Help me!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 FOOTBALL!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Thank you.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Pheebs, spit that out, that has pork in it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh! I though the pot stickers were supposed to be vegetarian!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Yeah, I changed them. I-I sent you a fax about it!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I don't have a fax machine.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ah, well then there are gonna be a few surprises!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I can't believe we're gonna be the only people that aren't in this wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I know, I hate being left out of things.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 And it's a wedding! It'd be weird if I'm not in it...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Hey guys, how is it going?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Fine. We're just sitting here. Alone. Doing nothing. It's our rehearsal for tomorrow.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Yeah look, about tomorrow, I... I've got a question for ya. I just found out that one of my groomsmen had had an emergency and can't make it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 What happened?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Who cares, AND?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 ...and I was wondering if... you know, maybe one of you guys...  
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I'll do it!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  M-Me-me-me!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 You both wanna do it? Uhm... there's only room for one.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Pick me, I look great in a tux and I will not steal focus.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 No, Mike, no, no. You wanna pick me, I mean... watch!  Huh?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 You know, I really don't feel very comfortable making this decision. You know, Phoebe knows you better, I'm gonna let her choose. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  Well, if Phoebe's choosing, then say hello to Mike's next groomsman.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Oh, I will. But I will need a mirror... as he is me!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Please, you're going down!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 You are going downer!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Is that what they say on the Figure Skating Team?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  I wouldn't know, I didn't make it! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 So, you know I'm filling in for Phoebe's step dad, tomorrow, right?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Yeah, yeah. Hey, thanks for doing that.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, hey, my pleasure.  So what are your intentions with my Phoebe?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 I intend to marry her.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, a wiseacre. . No, no, no, I understand you plan to support your wife by playing the piano? Isn't that kind of unstable?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 No more so than acting.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Strike two!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 You're right. She probably will support me. Hey, unless we move in with you, dad?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Strike three! You only get one more, Mike!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 So, what did you decide?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I decided to pee.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Mike didn't tell you? You have to chose one of us to be in your wedding. One of his groomsmen fell out.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh no, no. I can't choose between you two! I love you both so much!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Just not enough to put us in the original wedding party.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, I don't wanna choose! It's . Oh okay, wait. Rach! Listen I have a very special bridesmaid task for you today.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	  Goody, what is it!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Well, there's a spot open for only one groomsman and you have to choose between Ross and Chandler. So good luck with that.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 All right, I guess I'll have to find a new bridesmaid.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I'll do it! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ok, it's 2100 hours.  Time for your toast. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Do I have a minute to go to the bathroom?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 You had a bathroom break at 2030. Pee on your own time, Mike! . Now, in regard to the toast, okay, you wanna keep them short, nothing kills a rehearsal dinner like long speeches. Okay. You just get in, do your thing and get out!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Is that what you say to Chandler?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  It's 2101 and I am not amused. . Ok, the bride and groom have a few words they'd like to say. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Ok. Hello everyone and thank you all for being here tonight. So tomorrow's the big event and some of you might not know, but Mike and I didn't get off to the best start. . My friend Joey and I decided to fix each other up with friends so I, I...  oh I... hum... I gave it a lot of thought and I fixed him up with my friend Mary Ellen who couldn't be here tonight because...  it's not important... she is in rehab. Anyway, so, ok, Joey said that he was fixing me up with his friend Mike, only he didn't have a friend Mike so he just brought, uhm, my Mike and, and  but despite, you know... it got... it got good. Ok, I wanna take a moment to mention my mother, who couldn't be here...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 oh God.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 And... moment's over!  So, ok, uh, I can forget that. I can forget that and uhm...  Oh this is funny! Oh, but you need to know that to... that, to... Oh, ok, well, uhm, I . Ok, ok, I, ok, I.... MONICA I CAN'T DO IT LIKE THIS! THIS IS MY WEDDING! OKAY, I DON'T WANT THIS  OR THIS  OR THIS  OK? I JUST WANTED A SIMPLE WEDDING! WHERE MY FIANCEE CAN GO TO THE BATHROOM ANYTIME HE WANTS!  You know what? You're done.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 What?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 YOU'RE FIRED!   Cheers! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Happy wedding day!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, happy my wedding day to you!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, man! I wouldn't have had breakfast if I knew there was going to be corsages! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Hi. About last night... I know you are under a lot of stress and even though the things you said hurt me a little bit... My point is, uh, well, I'm willing to take my job back.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, well that's ok. I think you and I will do much better if you're just... here as a bridesmaid.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Oh, is that so? Ok. If that's really what you want, then here... I give you the headset. Well, I don't really want to give you the headset. Well I guess if you're taking over, you should probably return these messages. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Wow, this is a lot!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Uh-huh, but I'm sure you can handle this. I mean, I have won awards for my organizational skills, but, uh, I'm sure you'll do fine.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 You won awards?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Mm-mh. I printed them out on my computer.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Hey!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Hi.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Where's Rach?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 She's in her room, why?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I have to talk to her about this groomsman situation, ok? I'm not gonna watch Chandler up there while I'm sitting in the seats like some chump! .  Oh! My God! You're breathtaking! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 What d'you want?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 You haven't by any chance chosen a groomsman yet, have you?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh, Ross, c'mon, please! Don't make this harder than it already is!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I'm not! I'm making it easier! Pick me!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Listen, listen. Whoever you pick is gonna walk down the aisle with you! Now, I promise I won't say a word, but if you pick Chandler he's gonna be whispering stupid jokes in your ear the whole time!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh, you are the lesser of two evils!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  YES, YES!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Sven I don't understand what you're saying! What is wrong with the flowers? Lorkins? What the hell are lorkins? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 I know.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Hey.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Listen, Mike, if you were Swedish and you were saying the word "lorkins" what flowers would that be?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	  Orchids?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Right there! That's why I'm marrying you!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  Hello Michael.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Joseph.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 May I have a word with you, please?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	  This is... great...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Have a seat.  Last night, I tried to welcome you into my family... and instead, you disrespect me...  I cannot allow this. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	  Are you rehearsing for some really bad mafia movie?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 More back talk. And yes, I may be borrowing a few lines from my recent unsuccessful audition for "Family Honor 2: Thissa Time Itsa Personal." 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Joey, I kinda have a lot to do today, what do you want?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I want you to take this seriously! Phoebe is very very important to me, ok? And I wanna make sure that you are gonna take care of her.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	  Joe, I love Phoebe. She's the single most important thing in my life. I'd die before I let anything happen to her. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  That's what I wanted to hear! Because she's family, ok, and now you're gonna be family, and there is nothing more important in the whole world, than family. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 That must have been one lousy movie.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  That was ME!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Hi
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Hey, can I talk to you about this groomsman thing? If you pick Ross, he'll walk you down the isle just fine. But if you choose me, you'll be getting some comedy!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Even so, I think I'm gonna pick Ross.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Let me tell you why you need to pick me.  See, when I was a kid, I was always left out of everything, you know, and it really made me feel... insecure. You know, I was always picked last in gym. Even behind that big fat exchange student who didn't even know the rules to baseball. I mean, this guy would strike out and then run to third. Anyway, If I'm the only one left out of this wedding, I just know that all those feelings are gonna come rushing back. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 All right fine, I pick you.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  Y-Y-YEEESSS! Make "groom" for Chandler.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	  Oh my...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 No! We're gonna do it my way.  Because your way is stupid! Alright I gotta go, I have another call, Reverend.  Hello? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I'm glad we had this little talk.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Yes. Yeah and thanks for all the wedding night advice.  That didn't make me uncomfortable at all! Alright, so I'll see everybody tonight?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Okay.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Bye.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Uhm, did you guys know that there is a giant ice sculpture in the hall? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh my God, what's it doing here? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Ugh, I guess it got sent to the billing address as opposed to the shipping address.  Uh! What a pickle.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Oh my God, everything is such a mess. Why is this happening to me? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  How bad do you want to stick your tongue on that? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 How's it going? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  Good. I'm just getting some coffee. So I'm alert for the wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  That's what I was doing too.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  Well, you have fun tonight.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 You too. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Oh, I will.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Me too.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Wait a minute, I know why I'm being such an ass, why are you? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I'm not supposed to tell you. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I'm not supposed to tell you!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 You told us both we could be in the wedding? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Rachel, only one of us can do it, you have to choose. You and me together again. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Rach, Rach, knock knock.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Who's there?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I'll tell you at the wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Uh.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Hey, I forgot my scarf. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 You know what, I can't do this. I don't know which one of you guys to pick. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Oh, you haven't picked yet. Oh good, 'cause I had an idea. I thought it would be fun if the third groomsman was my family dog. Chappy. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 What? A dog? No! Rachel gets to choose. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	  Wow, this is a tough one. I think I'm gonna have to go with the dog.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Alright, wait, so what you're saying is that the chef is at the Hamilton Club, but the food is not and the drinks are there, but the bartender is not? Are you, are you FREAKING KIDDING ME!? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  How's it going? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Help me.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 What? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I want you to be Crazy Bitch again. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Really? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Please? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 You really want me to come back?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 More than I wanna get married.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ok people, we are back in business!  Oh God, we've missed you soo much!  Ok, go and get your hair and make-up done, and I'll take care of everything.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Hey, what are you guys gonna do?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  About what?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 The blizzard. I just saw on the news, it's like the worst snow storm in 20 years! They already closed all the bridges and tunnels. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Ooh! But the band and the photographer are coming all the way in from New Jersey!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I don't think they are.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  Haha! Looks like you're not going to be in the wedding either.  So sorry Pheebs. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  Well, the club lost it's power.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Yeah according to the news, most of the city did.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Since when do you watch the news? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Uh, for your information, since they hired a very hot weather girl.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  I can't believe you guys aren't going to be able to get married today.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I know.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Wow, you know, it's so beautiful out there. You always wanted to get married outside. Why don't you guys just do it on the street?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 What? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Well, look, it's hardly snowing anymore. I mean you couldn't ask for a more romantic setting. This could be the simple wedding you've always wanted!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  What do you think? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 I think I wanna get married to you today. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Me too!  Monica, do you think we could do it?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  AFFIRMATIVE!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  OK LET'S GET THESE CHAIRS OUT HERE! Gunther, hit the Christmas lights.  Okay, who left the ice sculpture  ON THE STEAM GRATE? 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Mom	 Michael!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Hey! You made it. Great! Chappy! Hi!  Hi!  Mom, I know getting married in the street isn't something you approve of...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Mom	 No... It's lovely. The lights and the snow. I could look at them forever. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike'S Dad	  I crushed a pill and put it in her drink...  Come on, sweetheart.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	  You know, Chappy's too small to handle all this snow. Someone's gonna have to walk him down the aisle.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 So technically, would this person be in the wedding?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 I guess.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler, Ross	 I'll do it!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 No, but Chandler, hello... Aren't you scared of dogs?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I'm not scared.  I'll just take little Chappy and...  HE CAN SENSE MY FEAR. MY THROAT IS EXPOSED.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	  Well, I guess I'm in the wedding then. Ha haaa...  He stinks!
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Level 1 alert. I repeat, level 1. This is not a drill. Okay we've got a situation. The minister just called. He's snowed in. He can't make it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Oh, no! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh hey, don't worry. I'm still ordained from your wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Really?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Yeah, you'd think I'd give up being a minister and start paying to ride the subway? Huhuh...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Uhm, ministers don't ride the subway for free.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I had to read the Bible pretty carefully, but... yeah we do.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Okay, if Joey does the ceremony, then we have to find someone else to walk Phoebe down the isle.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  I'll do it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 I'll...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  Na ha ha...  Ne he he...  Ah ah...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Okay, Mike and Joey, get in position. Chandler, come with me. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Okay, Joey's doing the ceremony and Chandler's giving you away.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, okay. Hi new dad. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 So, you're ready to do this?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Uhuh, uhuh... Oh my God! This is really happening.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Oh Phoebe, I'm so happy for you honey. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh, thank you.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 I love you.  Oh, wait, wait, wait! No hugs. The dresses... Oh what the hell. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I love you guys.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel, Monica	 I love you.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Okay.  It's zero hour. All teams execute on my count.  Let's get this bad boy on the road.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	  Is it okay that I want you to wear that head set in bed tonight?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	  I have you scheduled for nudity at 2300 hours.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Oh yeah! 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Okay Marjorie, hit it.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Rachel	 Geez Ross, you could have showered.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 It's the dog.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Monica	 Groomsman, groomsman, why are you just standing there, where is your bridesmaid?  We've got a broken arrow. Bridesmaid down!  Oh, that's me.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Ready?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	  Okay.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Okay.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh wait, oh no. Wait.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 Wow! Aren't you gonna be cold?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I don't care... I'll be my something blue.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 You look beautiful.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Thank you.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 My God! Aren't you freezing?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Na-ah.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Friends, family, dog... Thank you all for being here to witness this blessed event. The cold has now spread to my special place... so I'm gonna do the short version of this. Phoebe and Mike are perfect for each other. And I know I speak for every one here... when I wish them a lifetime of happiness. Who has the rings?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	  Okay...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 When I was growing up, I didn't have a normal mom and dad, or a regular family like everybody else, and I always knew that something was missing. But now I'm standing here today, knowing that I have everything I'm ever gonna need... You are my family. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 Phoebe you're so beautiful. You're so kind, you're so generous. You're so wonderfully weird. Every day with you is an adventure, and I can't believe how lucky I am, and I can't wait to share my life with you forever. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 Oh wait, oh I forgot... and uhm... I love you... and you have nice eyes.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 I love you too. 
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Uh Joey...
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Yeah?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Chappy's heart rate has slowed way down.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Oh, okay. Phoebe, do you take this man to be your husband?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I do.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Mike, do you take this woman to be your wife?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Mike	 I do.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 I now pronounce you... husband and wife.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Phoebe	 I got married!  Could someone get me a coat, I'm freaking freezing.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 That really was an incredible wedding.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 It was, yeah. I kind of don't want it to end. Hey, you wanna come in for a drink and a bite of corsage?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I'd love to, but it's 2300 hours and I'm about to have the most organized sex anyone's ever had.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Joey	 Nice. Oh hey, what about Ross?
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Chandler	 I don't know. Maybe he hooked up with that hot girl he was talking to.
10	12	1012	The One With Phoebe's Wedding	Ross	 Come on Chappy, do your business. MAKE! MA-AKE! I did not sign on for this.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Hi
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	All	 Hey! Hi!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 How was the honeymoon?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 So, where's Mike?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Oh, he's at the doctor, he didn't poop the whole time we were there!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Well anyway, I'm glad you're back, I really need your help.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Oh, why? What's up?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 I have an audition for this play and for some of it I have to speak French. Which, according to my résumé, I'm fluent in.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Joey, you shouldn't lie on your résumé.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Yeah, you really shouldn't.  By the way, how was that year-long dig in Cairo?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  It was ok...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 I did not know you spoke French.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Oui, bien sur je parle Français! Qu'est-ce que tu penses alors?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh... you're so sexy!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Well, so, will you help me? I really wanna be in this play.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Sure! Tout le plaisir est pour moi, mon ami.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Seriously stop it, or I'm gonna jump on ya.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Hey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Hey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Why are you wearing my apron?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 I'm making cookies for Erica. And oh, by the way, we have to leave for the airport soon, her plane comes in about an hour.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Oh, hey, when she gets here, is it ok if I introduce you two as "my wife" and "the woman who's carrying my child"?  No? Divorce?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Hey. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Hey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 You guys know where Rachel is? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 No, we haven't seen her since this morning.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 So unbelievable. She was supposed to meet me half an hour ago with Emma. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Hey!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hey! 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 These are for Erica! 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 What? She's gonna eat all those cookies?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Well, I want he baby to come out all cute and fat!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 So, why is Erica coming to visit?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Well, because we want to get to know her better and she's never been to New York so she wants to see all the tourists' spots... you know, Statue of Liberty, Empire State Building...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Oh, those places! There's always so many people, their being corralled like cattle, and... you know, there's always some idiot who goes "Mooooo"!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Well, if it annoys you so much, then why do you do it?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Oh, hi! Hi! Thanks for showing you up thirty minutes late!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ross...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 No, no, no, I'm sure you have a great excuse, wh-was it a hair appointment, a mani-pedi or was there a sale at Barney's?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 My father had an heart attack...  ...while I was at Barney’s. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh my God.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Honey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 I'm so sorry...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Is-is he ok?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Ok, ok. I'm gonna come out to Long Island with you, I mean, you can't be alone right now.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 No, come on, I'm totally ok.  I don't need you to come! I can totally handle this on my own.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Still-still, let me come... for me.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ok. If you really need to.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I bet someone could use one of Monica's freshly baked cookies.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh, I really could.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ohh... 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 All right, it seems pretty simple. Your first line is "My name is Claude", so, just repeat after me. "Je m'appelle Claude".
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Je de coup Clow.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Well, just... let's try it again.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Ok. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Je m'appelle Claude.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Je depli mblue.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Uh. It's not... quite what I'm saying. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Really? It sounds exactly the same to me.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 It does, really?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Yeah.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 All right, let just try it again. Really listen.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Got it.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	  Je m'appelle Claude.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Je te flouppe Fli.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Oh, mon Dieu!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Oh, de fuff!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	  Hey you guys.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Hi!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Hey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 I want you to meet someone really special. Phoebe, this is Erica. And this is the baby!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Oh!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Joey. Erica, baby!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Hi.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Everyone. Erica, baby!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Monica. Calm, self.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Thank you. It's really nice to meet you guys, I can't believe I'm here!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Welcome to New York City! Or should I say "ghe deu flooff New York City"?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Why would you say that?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Ok. What are you gonna be doing today?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 I wanna see everything! Times Square, Coney Island, Rockefeller Center...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Oh, you know what you should do? You should walk all the way at the top of Statue of Liberty.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Oh yeah, let's do that!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Great!  This baby'd better to be really good.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Oh, uhm, excuse me, I'm here to see my father. My name is Rachel Green.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 And I'm Doctor Ross Geller.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ross, please, this is a hospital, ok? That actually means something here.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Can somebody please go in?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Nurse	 Absolutely.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Rach, I think I'm gonna wait out here, because my throat is feeling a little scratchy, I don't want to infect him.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ross, please, don't be so scared of him!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I'm not scared of him, I'm really sick!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Nurse	 He's under sedation, so he's pretty much out.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I'm feeling better.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh!  Oh! Oh my God! Ohhh, ohhh, wow, that ear and nose hair trimmer I got him was just money down the drain, huh?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Nurse	 Miss Green, your father's doctor is on the phone if you'd like to speak to him.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh, great, Are you gonna be ok?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 He's unconscious, I think we'll be just fine!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ok.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Did the TV wake you?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Dr. Green	 No, when you put your feet up in my bed, you tugged on my catheter.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Ouchy.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Dr. Green	 What are you doing here, Geller?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Well, I came with Rachel, who should be back any second!  So what's new?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Dr. Green	 Ooh, I have a little heart attack.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Right, is it painful?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Dr. Green	 What, the heart attack or sitting here talking to you?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Dr. Green	 So what's new with you, uh, knocked up any more of my daughters lately?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Nope, just the one. RACH!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Je m'appelle Claude.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Je do call blue!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Noooo! Ok, maybe if we just break it down. Ok, let's try at one syllable at a time. Ok? So repeat after me. "je".
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 je.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 m'ap
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 mah
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 pelle
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 pel.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Great, ok faster! "je"
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 je.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 m'ap
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 mah
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 pelle
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 pel.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Je m'appelle!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Me pooh pooh!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Ok, it's too hard, I can't teach you!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 What are you doing?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 I, I have to go before I put your head through a wall. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	  Don't move! Don't go! I need you! My audition is tomorrow! Shah blue blah! Me lah peeh! Ombrah! . Pooh.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hey!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Hi!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I was gonna make us some dinner but all I found in your dad's fridge was bacon and heavy cream.  I think we solved the mystery of the heart attack.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Uh.  Did you call your parents?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh, yeah. Emma's doing great.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh good.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Wow.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 What?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Just can't believe I'm in Rachel Green's room.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 What do you mean? You've been in my room before!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Yeah, sure, right! Like I've ever been in Rachel Green's room.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ok I gotta tell ya, it's really weird when you use my whole name.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Sorry. . You ok?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 You had a rough day, uh?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Yeah, just so weird seeing him like that, you know? I mean he is a doctor, you don't expect doctors to get sick!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 But we do!  It's gonna be ok, Rach!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Ow. I don't want him to wake up alone! I should go to the hospital!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 What? No, no! Hey, hey, hey look...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 What?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 They gave him a lot of medication, ok? He wouldn't even know if you were there. Look, we'll go see him first thing in the morning, ok?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Really, I shouldn't feel guilty?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 No, God! Hey, Rach, you've been an amazing daughter, ok? Right now you just need to get some rest.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ok, maybe you're right.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Good night.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Wait, wait, wait, wait. Would you stay here with me for a little while?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Sure!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Ok.  Thank you for coming with me today.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh, of course...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Rachel Green is very happy you're in her room!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Me too. Come here. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 I just don't want to be alone tonight.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Ok, well, uh, I can maybe grab a sleeping bag, or... Oh, oh. . No, Rach! I'm sorry, I just don't think this, this, this is a good idea.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Wait, we won't know that until we do it, will we?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 No, look, uh. You are upset about your father and you're feeling vulnerable and I just don't feel it would be right, I'd feel like I'd be, you know, taking advantage of you.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Taking advantage? I'm giving you the advantage, enjoy!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Look, I'm sure it would be great, but I-I think one of us has to be thinking clearly, so, I'm gonna go!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Wow. Ok.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I'll see you in the morning .
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Mhm-mh!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Haven't had sex in four months, I should get a medal for that!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Thanks so much for taking me to all those places. I had a great time.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Oh, I'm glad. Listen, I want to apologize about Chandler, though. I just did not see this coming.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	  New York is awesome!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 What is with you?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Yeah, I've been to these places before, but I've never really seen them, you know.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Yeah, you miss alot, when you're moo-ing.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Thanks so much for showing me around.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Oh! It was our pleasure. We are so much enjoying getting to know you.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Well, if there is anything else you wanna know... 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Oh, uhm, okay, uhm, do you mind if we ask you some questions about the father? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Oh, sure. Yeah, well, he was my high school boyfriend. Captain of the football team, really cute and he got a scholarship and went off to college. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 That's great. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Yeah... it's almost definitely him. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 How's that now?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Well, there is a chance it's another guy. I mean, I have only ever been with two guys, but they sorta overlapped. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 So, what does the other guy do? Does he go to college too? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 No, he's in prison. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Was he falsely accused of something? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 No... he killed his father with a shovel.  But other than that, he's a great guy. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 I'll bet his dad doesn't think so.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Are you awake? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Of course I'm awake. Assume from now on that I'm always awake! 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Alright, we don't know that it's him. I mean, it could be the football guy. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Honey, it's us. Of course it's the shovel-killer.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Alright, lets say that it is him, would we not want the baby? No! Would we treat him any differently?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 I'd keep an eye on him! We have to find out which one the father is. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 How? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 I dunno, aren't there tests for these things, right?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Yeah, but maybe we're just over-reacting. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Pff, easy for you to say, he's a father killer. He probably loves him mommy. He's probably got a tattoo that says "mom" on his shovel-wielding arm!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Tape	 We will now count from one to five. Un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Huh, un, blu, bla, flu, flenk!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Tape	 Good job.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Thank you. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Hey Joey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Hey!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Listen, I feel really badly about yesterday and I thought about it a lot and, and I know, I was too impatient. SO lets try it again.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Oh, no, that's okay, I don't need your help. I worked on it myself and I gotta say, I am pretty good!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Really, can I hear some of it. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Sure, sure. Ok,  "Bleu de la bleu, de la blu bla bleu"  See?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Well, you're not,  You're not... you're not... again, you're not SPEAKING FRENCH! 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	  Oh well I think I am, yeah and I think I'm definitely gonna get the part.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 How could you possibly think that? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 For one thing, the guy on the tape said I was doing a good job!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hey Rach, can you grab me a cup of coffee? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Sure. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 You've been quiet all morning. Is everything okay? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Hmm-hmm. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 You sure you're alright?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Yep.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  O-kay. Well, I'm gonna go grab us some breakfast. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 FYI..
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  There it is... 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex... just do it. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Wait, wait,  You're mad at me about last night? I was just trying to do the right thing.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Really? Well, it seems to me if you'd done the right thing, I would not have woken up today feeling stupid and embarrassed, I would have woken up feeling comforted and satisfied!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	  Well...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh stop that! 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I can't believe this. I was just being a good guy. I treated you with respect and understanding. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Oh, that is so hot. She walks around him to the other side)
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hey, I was looking out for you.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh, really, well Ross, you know what? I am a big girl. I don't need someone telling me what is best for me.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 I gotta say, I have not had sex a lot of times before, this is the worst ever.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh, really, really? Well, it wasn't very good for me either. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hey you know what? You know what? To avoid this little thing in the future, let's just say, you and me, never having sex again.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 What?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 That's right, sex is off the table.  I am never having sex with you again.  Dr. Green, are you feeling better? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Hey! How was lunch?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	  We had a good time. By the way, I wanted to ask you something. It would really mean a lot to me, if the baby was a boy, that you name him after my father, Jiminy Billy Bob 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	  Oh, really? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 No!  You we're right, that was fun! I'm gonna go finish packing.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 O-okay.  So, is she gonna take the test?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 Nope, she doesn't have to, I found out who the father is.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Oh God. It's shovely-Joe, isn't it? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	  No it's not. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 How do you know? 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Erica	 Well, it turns out that Erica didn't pay much attention in Sex Ed class, because the thing she did with that prison guy... it'd be pretty hard to make a baby that way. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	 Oh God! What was it? The thing that we hardly ever do or the thing we never do?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Monica	 The thing we never do.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Chandler	  Shovely Joe!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	 Whenever you're ready Joey.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Right.  Dja bu bu Claude. Uh, c'est la pu les la lu blah bloo.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Casting Assistant	 I'm sorry, what's going on?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Dude, come on! French it u-up!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	 Joey, do you speak French?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Toutes la smore! Bu blu-ay bloo blah ooh! Pfoof!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	 You know what. I think this audition is over. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	  Uh, excuse me. Uh, I am Reginé Philange. I was passing by when I heard this man speaking the regional dialect of my French town of Estée Lauder.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	 You really think this man is speaking French?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Sa-sa-saw!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Écoutez, je vais vous dire la vérité. C'est mon petit frère. Il est un peu retardé. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Alors, si vous pouviez jouer le jeu avec lui...  
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	  Good job, little buddy. That was some really good French. But I think we're gonna go with someone else for the part.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Ah. All right. But my French was good?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Director	 It was great.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	  Oh-hoh! Ha-hah! See!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	  Merci. Au revoir. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Yeah-hah. Toute-de-le-fruit.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Emma's down for the night.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Oh, good.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 So uh... I guess I wanna take off.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Okay... Hey listen, just before you go I-I again, I just wanna say "thank you" for coming with me.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh, no problem.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 And also, you know I uh, I was thinking about what you said, you know, about the whole sex thing and... it's probably not a great idea to go down that road again.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Thank you. I'm glad you agree.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 It's a shame though, I mean, when we did it, it was pretty good.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Yeah... Yeah, that's true.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Hey uhm, do you remember that one really great time...?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Oh, ye-ah!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 You know it was you're uhm... birthday...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 ...Valentine's day...
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Both	  Oh yeah!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Well, I guess that's all in the past, now.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Hmmm-mmmm.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	  Not even one more time?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Not even once.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 No matter how much we want it.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Even if we want it really bad.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 That's what we decided.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Uhm, right!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 ...It's kinda hard though!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Yeah.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 You know, when two people have a connection, you know, that's... just seems like such a... waste.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 ...I hate waste.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 ...Ross?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Yes?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Rachel	 Just so you know... With us... it's never off the table. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Ross	 Damn it. It's never off the table. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Okay, can you really tapdance?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 No.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 It's off the resumé. 
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Archery?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 No.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Horseback riding?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 Would fall off a lot.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 You can drink a gallon of milk in 10 seconds?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 That I can do.
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Come on! You can drink a gallon of milk in 10 seconds?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Joey	 All right, watch me!  Okay, you time me. Ready?
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	 Ready... GO!
10	13	1013	The One Where Joey Speaks French	Phoebe	  You did it!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	  Thank you guys for having us over.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh! Yeah, this is fun, couples night.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Yeah, I don't know why we hang out with married couples more often.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Well, because every time we do, you make jokes about swinging and scare them away.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 You mean that Portuguese couple? Yeah, like you wouldn't have done it. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	  Hey, you guys... I have great news.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Ross, we're kind of in the middle of diner here.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Oh, well, er, I already ate, but sure...!  Guess what happened at work today...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 A dinosaur died a million years ago?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Try sixty-five million years ago, and then try sssshhhhhh.... My tenure review board met today and I hear it's looking really good.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Wow!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Yeah. Do you have any idea what this means in academic circles, uh? I am gonna get laid.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Hi you guys.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	All	 Hey.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ooh, Italian!  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 No one wanted seconds, right?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 No, no. I-I'm good.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Hey you guys... You're never gonna believe it. This headhunter called me. I have a meeting tomorrow with Gucci. Gucci wants me.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 I'm up for tenure.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Congratulations!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 You too! What are the odds?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ooh! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Guess what?  I finally got that seed out of my teeth.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 I don't know who I'm happiest for...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 I do, he's been working on that all day! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Hey Mon? Was it weird changing your name to Geller-Bing?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 No, no. It felt nice to acknowledge this. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Where did you go to do it?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Uhm the... the ministry... of names... bureau...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 YOU NEVER DID IT!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 I'm sorry. It's just the idea of being an official Bing.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Hey! I will have you know that... aah, who am I kidding. Let's call the kid Geller and let Bing die with me.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	  Here you go.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Thanks! Honey, would you want me to take your name?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Oh, it's just... It's up to you. It's your name. You've got to live with it. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 All right, let's see, call me mrs Hannigan.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Mrs Hannigan?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 What? Can't you see I'm in the middle of something? Ooh, I like it.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Hey guys.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Hey Joe! We've got a couple of things we've got to check out at the new house. You want to come with us?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 No, thank you.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 All right. I know you're not happy about us moving, but you're the only one who hasn't seen the house.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Yeah, come with us. You'll see how close it is to the city.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 But no, it's not close. You said it was in escrow? I couldn't even find it on the map.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Joey, please come. It would mean so much to us.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 You know what? You are my friends, I wanna be supportive, I will come with you. SHOTGUN!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Damn it.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 See you guys later.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Okay!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	  I'll pick you up at eleven. So glad you're coming.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Good for you. That was really mature.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 What? No, the only reason  I'm going to their stupid new house, is so I can point out everything that's wrong with it, so they don't move. I'm gonna make them stay here.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 You're a strange kind of grown-up.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Joey, you can't make someone do something they don't want to do. Believe me, there's something I've been trying to get Mike to do in bed and there's... he's just... 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Woo-wo-hey-hey-hey... Can we not talk about that right now?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 All right, prude... Look, Monica and Chandler really love this house. You are not gonna talk them into staying here.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Hey, hey... I can convince people to do anything, you know. I bet I can even get Mike to do that "thing". What is it?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 I AM NOT GONNA HELP YOU DO THAT! Goodbye! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Hi, I'm here to see mr Campbell... with Gucci. The reservation is probably under Gucci. It's spelled like Gukki, which could be confusing.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Maitre D'	 Mr Campbell's not here yet. Let me show you to his table.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh my God! That's my boss. You have to seat us somewhere else.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Maitre D'	 I'm sorry. That's always mr Campbell's table.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 But my... but my boss cannot see me. I'm interviewing for another job.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Maitre D'	 I know. With Gukki 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Sssshhhh!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Zellner	 Rachel?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Hi... I'm on a date...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Zellner	  That's great!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Yeah, it is. Yeah, you know, it's tough. Single mom, career... You gotta get out there.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Zellner	 Well, you got uhm... good energy.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 Rachel?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Yes, hi!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 James Campbell...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Hi!  Excuse us.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 Please... 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Okay. Oh, yeah...  Oh he's cute!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 So... your resumé is quite impressive.  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Wha... My resumé? I wouldn't... I wouldn't call my online dating profile a resumé.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 Dating profile? I-I-I'm talking about the work resumé.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Whatever happened to just singing for  no reason? Huh?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 Maybe people... found it weird.... So, why do you want to leave Ralph Lauren?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 What? I-I don't.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 You don't?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 No, I-I-I love it there. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 Well, if you don't want to leave, why are we having this lunch?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 What?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mr Campbell	 That's Hugo Boss?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	  This place is so depressing. If I had to work here I'd kill myself.  But you obviously haven't.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Clerk	 How can I help you? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 I need to change my name, please. See, I need to change it because I'm-I'm hiding from the law.  You're fun.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Clerk	 You need to fill out this form.  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Okay, well, I just don't, I don't know how it works exactly. See, my name is Buffay and my husband's name is Hannigan, so is it supposed to be Buffay-Hannigan or Hannigan-Buffay?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Clerk	 It can be anything you want.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Well, not anything, I mean...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Clerk	 Yeah... anything.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh, this could take a while.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Clerk	 Get out of my line.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Okay.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Hey Pheebs.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh, not anymore. I changed it today.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh, I'm sorry, mrs Hannigan.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Wrong again! Apparently you can change it to anything you want. So I thought, all right, here's an opportunity to be creative. So meet Princess Consuela Banana Hammock.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 That's what we were gonna name the baby.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Phoebe!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Uh! Princess Consuela.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 You seriously changed your name to that?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Uh-huh! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Okay, so from now on we have to call you Princess Consuela?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Uhm, no. I'm gonna have my friends call me Valerie.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Hey, how'd the interview go?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh! It's not good.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 You know, I always feel that way after an interview. I'll bet it went better than you think.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Well, I didn't get the job at Gucci and I got fired from Ralph Lauren.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 That is a bad interview.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 What are you, what are you talking about? How did this happen?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Well, my boss was at the same restaurant where I was having my interview and he heard everything. So later he calls me to his office and he tells me that he's gonna have to let me go, because I'm not a team player. And I said "Wait a minute! Yes I am." and I had to sit there for 45 minutes while he proved that that in fact... was true. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh God. I'm so sorry.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Hey! Wha-hoo! What's this?  Well it's a, it's a bottle of champagne. Why is this here?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Ross...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 I guess it's here because I GOT TENURE!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	All	 Congratulations! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 This is the single greatest day of my professional career. Gunther, six glasses!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Gunther	 Six? You want me to join you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Oh, I thought Joey was here. Five is good.  Well, I'm gonna have a loogie in my coffee tomorrow. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Ooh! Israeli champagne. And it's vanilla!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 I got tenure. I didn't win the lottery... Hey Rach, so uh... how did your thing go?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh it... good! Yeah, but I'm not gonna hear from that for a couple of days.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Oh, you know what? You're gonna get it. I-I-I-I can feel it.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Can you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ah, all right. Here's to Ross!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 And-and to years of hard work finally paying off.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 And to knowing that your career doesn't mean everything. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 But also knowing it means a lot.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 But more importantly to full well-rounded lives.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 ...that center around work.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 To Ross!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	All	 Ross!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 You know what the best part about this is? I can never be fired.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh God!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 No seriously. I have job security for life. You know, I never have to worry.  Oh, look at you. Look  how happy you are for me.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  No, it's not that. I got fired today. And I didn't get the other job.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Rach, I'm so sorry.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Great. I feel like an idiot.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 No, it's okay, you didn't know.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Oh...  Little heads-up would have been nice.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Thank you for letting us see the house again.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 And thank you for explaining to us what escrow means... I've already forgotten what you said, but thank you.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Realtor	 Take as long as you want. Just let me know when you're through.  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Ah, so glad you decided to come.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Me too. Yeah, this place is great. I'm so happy for you guys. Although, you know, I hope you like fungus.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 What?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Fungus! Yeah. Place is full of it.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 No it's not. We had an inspection and they didn't find anything.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Okay. Then I guess I have dry eyes and a scratchy throat for no reason.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Maybe because it's you hung your head out of the window like a dog the whole ride here.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Maybe. So this is the living room huh? Ooh, it's pretty dark.  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 No it's not!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Are you kiddin'? I think I just saw a bat in the corner!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 When your head was hanging out the window, it didn't hit a mailbox, did it?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Maybe. Well, I just think you guys can do better than this house, you know? Or any other house for that matter.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh Joey, look, we know you're having a hard time with this, but we really, we love it here. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 FINE, ok, if you love this house so much, then you should just live here, okay? I just hope you get used to that weird humming sound.  Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm... 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Joey, we know that's you.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 no... hmmmmm... it's not... hmmmmmmmmmm
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Hey 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Welcome back!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Ah! I missed you
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh, me too!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 So, what's new?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Well, I'm no longer Phoebe Buffay.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 That's great! You changed you name?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Yes I did! Meet: Princess Consuela Banana Hammock! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	  You're kidding right?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Nope.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 You really did that? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Yep.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Yeah, but you can't do that.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Why? It's fun, it's different, no-one else has a name like it.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	  Alright, then I'm gonna change my name.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Great, okay, what are you gonna change it to?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Crap Bag.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Mike Crap Bag?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 No, no Mike, just Crap Bag. First name Crap, last name Bag.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 You're not serious, right?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Yeah, I'm serious.  It's fun, it's different and no-one else has a name like that!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Uhu, uhu, well, then, great. If you love it, I love it. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 I do love it, and I love your name. I love Princess Consuela.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 And I love Crap.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Ow!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Girl	 Who are you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Oh, hi, I'm Joey. My stupid friends are buying this house. Who are you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Girl	 I'm Mackenzie. My stupid parents are selling this house.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Oh.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	  I hate my parents.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 I hate my friends.  Alright, look. There's gotta be a way that we can stop this from happening.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 Like what? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Uhm... oh! Okay. You come with me, and you tell them that the house is haunted!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 What are you? Eight? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Woah, uh! Okay, let's hear your great idea.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 I don't have any great ideas. I am eight.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Ahh! There's gotta be a way. I mean, you know, if Monica and Chandler move out here and now Phoebe is married to Mike. That just leaves me and Ross and Rach, you know what I mean? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 I really don't.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 What am I gonna do, I feel like I'm losing my friends.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 My parents say I'm gonna make new friends.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Oh, yeah, sure, easy for you, you're young. Me, I'm set in my ways.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 This is what my mom was talking about. Whiners are wieners.  Look, you want your friends to be happy, right? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, I guess.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 Well, if moving here is gonna make them happy, don't you want them to do it? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Yeah, maybe.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 Then you gotta let them go. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  I hate to admit it, but you're probably right. How did you get to be so smart?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	 I read a lot.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Just when I thought we could be friends. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Man	 Hey Rach, I just heard. I'm so sorry.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh, thank you... 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Man	 You still don't know my name, do you? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Well, now I don't have to. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Ross, what is taking you so long?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	   I'm sorry, it's almost as if this wasn't built for a quick getaway!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Rachel?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Mark? Oh my God! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 How've you been?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 I'm fantastic. You remember Ross? 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Sure, sure.  What's with the chair. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Uh, you know, you can't always get a seat on the subway, so...  
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Clever.  So how are you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh, well,  you're not catching me on my best day.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Yeah, a box full of your desk stuff doesn't exactly say big promotion.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 No, but it's good, you know, I'm gonna take some time off and do some charity work.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Are you sure, because we may have something at Louis Vuitton.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Well, screw charity work. What've you got?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	 Why don't we have dinner tonight and talk about it?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Great! I'll call ya!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mark	  Nice to see you.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Yeah! yeah, I got tenure! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Oh my God!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 See? I told you something good would come along. And he seemed really nice. I've met him before?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ross! That's Mark. From Bloomingdales? You were insanely jealous of him.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	  That is Mark?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Yes.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 I hate that guy.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 No, no, NO, you cannot go to dinner with him.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 What? You don't want me to get a job?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Oh yeah, I'm sure he's gonna give you a job. Maybe make you his SEXretary.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ugh. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 I'm serious. I just don't trust that guy, okay?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Ross, you know what?  Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh, I love this street. The trees, the big front yards, the actual picket fences.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Man, those two dogs are going at it!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  Hey!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Hey.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Hey, where have you been?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Oh, just er... you know, looking around. But you know what? This house... is great.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Really? What changed your mind?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Oh well, the little girl who lives here made me feel a lot better about the whole thing.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Joey, there was a little girl who lived here, but she died like 30 years ago.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	  What?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Ha! I'm just messing with you.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 That's not funny! You know I'm afraid of little girl ghosts!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Joey, now that you're okay with the house, do you wanna go see your room?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 What? I get my own room?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 You don't think we'd buy a house and not have a Joey room do you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Oh my God!  Oh! Hey, can I have an aquarium? And a sex swing?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler, Monica	 No!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Why not? I'll keep the tank clean.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 After you, miss Banana Hammock.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Thank you, mister Bag.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Woman	 Oh hey, how are you?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Oh hi Rita! Good!  Oh, Rita's a massage client.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Oh! Why don't you introduce me?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	  Er, Rita, this is my husband.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rita	 Oh! 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Yeah.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Why don't you tell her my name?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	  Okay, I will.  This is my husband Crap Bag.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rita	 Crap Bag?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 If you need an easy way to remember it, just think of a bag of crap.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rita	 Okay. Excuse me...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Yeah... Ogh... Okay, fine. You made your point. Can you please just be Mike Hannigan again?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Only if you'll be Phoebe Buffay.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 How about uhm... How about Buffay-Hannigan?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Really?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 Yeah. I'm Phoebe Buffay-Hannigan Banana Hammock.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 Do you even know what a banana hammock is?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 It's a funny word.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mike	 It's a Speedo.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Phoebe	 ...Oh crap!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Hey, is Rachel here?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 No.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 She's still at dinner?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 I guess. Why? Who's she with?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 That guy Mark. From Bloomingdale's... She thinks he's just being nice to her. But I know he really wants to sleep with her.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 It's seven years ago.  My time machine works!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 We ran into him on the street today and he said he might have a job for her. But I know he just wants to get into her pants.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 So what if he wants to sleep with her? I mean, she's single and he's cute.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 Excuse me?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh please! Yesterday on the subway? You couldn't stop staring at that woman with the big breasts the whole time.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 For your information, I was staring at her baby. We're about to be parents.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Monica	 Oh, sorry!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	  Hi you guys!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Hey, so uhm... How was dinner?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh, it was great. Mark is so sweet.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	  Oh yeah? Yeah? I wonder why? What could that smarmy letch possibly want?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 Oh Ross, come on. He's happily married. His wife just had twins.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Should we send something?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 How did the job stuff go?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 He offered me one.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Chandler	 That's great!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Congratulations!
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 I know, it's amazing. It's amazing. It's so much better than what I had at Ralph Lauren. The money is great...
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Ross	 Can we, can we just stop for a second? Who said something better would come along, huh? You didn't believe me. I told you everything was gonna work out.  You know what? This calls for a bottle of Israels finest.
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Rachel	 The job is in Paris. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 I mean, this soap opera is a great gig, but... am I missing opportunities? You know, I've always thought of myself as a serious actor. I mean, should I be trying to do more independent movies?
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Mackenzie	  I don't know... You know what? I'm gonna put you on with my bear. Hold on. 
10	14	1014	The One With Princess Consuela	Joey	 Hey bear, I need some career advice.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Jennifer	 Previously on Friends...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 How did the job stuff go?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 He offered me one.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	  You know what? This calls for a bottle of Israels finest.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 The job is in Paris. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Oh, God! Please, somebody  say something.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 So if you take this job you'll be moving to Paris?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Or facing a bitch of a commute.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's... really far, far away   from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. And I've already   talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever   we need to make us feel comfortable.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Okay.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out...   Anything we want.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 My boss said I might be getting a new lamp in my cubicle. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 All right, we'll work it out.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Thank you! Thank you!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeah, yeah!  You sure this is what you want?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 I think it is. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Ooh, what's going on?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 I got a really incredible job offer.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Hey, great! All right!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Good for you!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 It's in Paris.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 What? No, no, no! No, no... no... no, no... No, too much is changing,   okay? First, Phoebe getting married  Congratulations! ... and then these two move into a stupid house in the stupid   suburbs...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Hey, this afternoon you said you'd be supportive...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Well, it comes and goes. I wouldn't trust it.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Look, you guys... this is really, really important to me. And it means   a lot if you could try to get on board.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Of course we can. Congratulations.    Yay!  Joey...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 No, no, no. My hugs are reserved for people STAYING IN AMERICA.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	  Joey, it would mean so...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Hey! No! Get your France-going-arms away from me. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Joey...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 You okay with this?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Well, it makes me feel sad, but...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Talking to Ross.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 I see.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Well, Rachel moving to another country? Not being able to see her every   day. How can I be okay with this?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 I know, but what are we gonna do? She really needs this job.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Do you think if the Ralph Lauren people offered her her old job back,   she would take it?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 How is that gonna happen?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Is this the best way to use one of your three magic wishes?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 I don't know. I could talk to her boss. Yeah! I met him at that Christmas   party. We really hit it off.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 You mean the guy who kept calling you Ron?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 I didn't say we were brothers.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Hey Phoebe. Hey, tell me what you think. All right. The house next   door to the one that we're buying in Westchester? Just went on the market. I wanna   take a look at it, but Chandler doesn't.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 We close escrow tomorrow, so seeing another house can only confuse   us, and we're easily confused. We're not very bright.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 But what if it is better than ours? Should we at least look?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 What do you think Pheebs?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Well, I think that shirt makes you look like you should work at a Baskin   Robbins... Anyway... Hey, isn't Joey's agent Estelle Leonard?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Yeah.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 She died.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 You're kidding!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 That's terrible!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, last Saturday. Wow! She was the first black man to fly solo across   the Atlantic.  Oh, wait a minute, I read the   wrong one.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Oh yeah? 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, she was just an agent.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Joey's gonna be *so* upset. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 I know. *He* always wanted to be the first black man to cross the   Atlantic.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Well, we cannot tell Joey about this. He's already flipping out about   everything that's changing. This will push him over the edge.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Seriously, you don't think we should tell him?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Well, not for a little while. Let's just give him a few days to get   used to everything else.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 What if he reads it in the paper?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Unless Snoopy says it to Charlie Brown, I think we're okay.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeah, I'm a friend of Rachel Green's. Uhm, actually we met at the Christmas   party about two years ago.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Oh right, uhm, Don?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Close. Ron. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Uh... What can I do for you?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Uhm, well... I'm here to see if you'll give Rachel her job back.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Ah, did she ask you to come here and do this?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Oh, no. At first I have to get you to agree. Then we'll   see if she wants to come back.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Wow, that is tempting. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Look, she loved her job here. And let's face   it: you're not gonna find anyone who did it as well as she did it. Isn't that   true?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 She is good!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	  Huh, I took a shot there.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 But I'm sorry. There's nothing I can do... Ah,   it's not true, there is... nothing I want to do.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 I see... Thanks very much.  Is this your son?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Yeah, his name is Ross.  What?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Oh, nothing, it’s just, it’s close to Ron. Does he.. Does   little Ross like dinosaurs by any chance? 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Yeah, they're all he talks about, why?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 How would he like to come with me to the Museum of Natural History after   everyone else has left, just the two of us, and he can touch anything he wants.   . I just heard it as you must have heard it and that’s   not good. Let me start again. I’m a paleontologist, you’ll be there   with us and the touching refers only to bones… fossils!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 You can really arrange that?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 You let Rachel come back, and it’s done. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Well, I guess having Rachel back wouldn’t be the worst thing   in the world.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeah! Yes! Thank you! This is great. Thank you so much. And I swear,   your kid is going to have the time of his life.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 That’s great. I worry about little Ross. He’s always   reading, he's collecting rocks and he’s obsessed with dinosaurs.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 He’ll be fine.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Hey Phoebe.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Hey. Everything ok?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I’m just mad at my agent.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Estelle? Why?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 There’s a part in a TV movie that I would be perfect for and I   didn’t even be put up for it! She’d better have a good reason.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 I’m guessing she does.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Well  I’m wanna hear it,   because she keeps doing this.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Well, no, no, wait, wait, wait. All right, I gotta go. Just listen. Promise me, that you   will wait a minute before you call her.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Ok. Why?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Because a promise between friends means never having to give a reason.   
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I love that saying!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Hello?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Joey, it’s Estelle.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I was just gonna call you! That’s weird.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe-Estelle	 It’s a little coincidental, but believable.   . Listen, I’m sure you’re wondering why   I didn’t get you an audition for that TV movie.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Yeah, actually I am!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe-Estelle	 I guess I dropped the ball there. Whoopsie! 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 That’s it? You know, it seems all you do lately is drop the ball.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe-Estelle	 Don’t take that tone with me. Who you   think you are? Alan Lemond, the first black man to fly solo across the Atlantic?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 No, no, look. All I’m saying is that you’re my agent, ok?   And you’re not getting me into any auditions and I’m tired of it.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe-Estelle	 What are you saying?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I’m saying that… . This isn't  working for me   anymore, ok? Estelle, you’re fired. Goodbye. .
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Man, tough week for Estelle!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Hi.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Hi.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Emma left her stuffed t-rex at my house. You know she can’t sleep   without it.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Oh, well, she’s asleep now. Stop forcing that thing on her.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Ok.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Oh, you’re not gonna believe what happened to me today! Ralph   Lauren called, and gave me my job back!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Nooo!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Yee. I mean, it was so weirdest thing. They fired me and then out   of nowhere they just hire me back! I mean, that place must have been falling   apart without me.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 So, you’re not going to Paris.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 No, I’m still going.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Wh… wh…what?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 When the Louis Vuitton people found out that Ralph Lauren wanted me back,   the offered me more money! Isn’t that great?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeeeah!  
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Lady	 Oh, sure. I’m showing it to someone else right now,   but please, look around.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Thanks.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 It feels like we’re cheating on our house.   And if we’re gonna cheat, shouldn’t it be with like a hot, younger house,   that does stuff that our house won’t do?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Ours is so much better! This living room is smaller, the dining room looks   like a cave! What a hole!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Lady	 So? What do you think?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Love it!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Lady	 Well, we already have one offer on it, and I think the lady   upstairs is goning to make another one.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 They could be our neighbors, what are they like?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Lady	 Oh, the woman upstairs is very nice. She and her husband have two kids,   he's on Wall Street and she…
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Oh my God!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Sure.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Hey Joey, want come with me to… are you ok?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Yeah, I just… I just feel bad about firing Estelle. This is got to be   killing her.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 No, that wouldn’t kill her. Ordinary embolism might.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I don’t know. She’s got to be taking it hard, I was like   her only client. Except for this guy who eats paper. And I’m guessing   he eats more money than he makes. Look, I know she’s not a great agent, but   she did stick with me for ten years. I’m gonna call her and hire her again.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 No, no, no! Don't call her! You wait for her to call   you 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Why?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Because patience is the road to understanding  which ...   is the key... to a happy heart.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	  You blow me away. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	  All right, so promise you're gonna wait for her   to call you?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 I promise. And that means, never having to give a reason. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 And yet I never run into Beyonce!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Realtor	 You two know each other?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Oh, we go way back. Before Monica made an honest man   out of him, Chandler used to be my little love muffin! . So? Are you guys thinking of getting this house too? Ooh! Are we gonna   have a bidding war? I'd better warn you, I'm a toughie 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	  Don't, don't! 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 No, actually, we're buying the house next door. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	  Why!?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	  I don't know   why.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Ooh, that decides it then. I was on the fence.   But knowing that you two would be our neighbors? Ah! now we have to   get it!  Ellen, we're going to talk   numbers.  
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 This can not be happening!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Okay, the realtor said another couple made an offer.   Maybe the Janice's won't get it! Maybe the other couple will.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 The only way that that is going to happen, is if the other couple   are the Hitlers.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	  Okay, Okay,    All right. What if we got both houses? Huh? We can turn this house   into a guest house.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 That is a great idea! And by the way, I don't mean to sound distasteful,   but when did you start crapping money!?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Okay, you come up with an idea.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Alright alright, we still have three hours till escrow closes on   our house. We can still get out.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 But we love our house.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Will we love it so much with her next door? And she's gonna be louder   out here too. Just the crickets and  "Oh My God"! 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Monica	 Okay, but if we don't get this house, she's stil gonna show up wherever   we go! I mean, at least if she's here, it eliminates the element of suprise.   I mean, never again will you have to hear the three words that make your balls   jump back up inside your body. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	  Well, we   have to do something. We can't have her living next door.  Oh, that does it too. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Who is it?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	  It's me. Ron.    Look, I um, I now Rachel turned you down but I think there is a way you might   be able to get her to come back. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 This may surprise you, but re-hiring fired employees,   is not my main job.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Just hear me out. How would you feel about offering her a raise? 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	  Not good, Ron. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Perhaps I can persuade you. What if you can give your son this  genuine pterodactyl egg  replica.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	  Wow, that's   pretty cool 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Huh? So? We have a deal?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 Okay, you got it.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yes! yes! 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	 This is gonna make me very popular.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Oh,  Believe me, the ladies, they love it!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Mr Zelner	  I meant with my son.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Good, 'cause the ladies, not so much. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Oh my God.  Hello?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	  Joey,   it's Estelle. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Estelle?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Yeah, I wanted to call and tell you that there's no hard feelings for   firing me.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	  Ok-ay. I just, I can't believe you're calling me?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Well, I didn't think I should just drop by...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 No, no, no!  Don't drop by,   don't drop by!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	 Anyway, you did what you had to do. I'm okay.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Can I ask you something? Uhm, what's it like there?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Phoebe	  It's alright. Look kiddo, I gotta go. Good luck with   the career. You're gonna be huge.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Thanks for everything Estelle. Bye.    "out of area". Boy, I'll say.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 The Hitlers will be so disappointed.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 All right, I got to run. Tell Monica I say goodbye. And... I'll see   you later, neighbor. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Wait! I just want you to know that... I'm so happy you're going to   be here.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Oh, me too... 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Because... that way... we can pick up where we left off.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Huh?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 I never stopped loving you.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Oh... my...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Yeah, yeah, yeah! I want you... I need you... I must have you Janice   Litman Goralnik Neihosenstein.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Chandler, what are you talking about?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Now that you live next door, we can be together every day. Sid and   Monica never have to know a thing.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 I don't know what to say... I mean, you know, obviously we have this...   heat between us.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	  Obviously.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 But I love my husband. And I know you love your wife. Now, I don't   think we should get this house now.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 Don't say that. Don't tangle the dream and take it away.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Chandler, one of us has got to be strong.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	 I understand.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Janice	 Although, maybe just... one last moment of weakness...  Goodbye Chandler Bing. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Chandler	  They're never coming down now.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Hi!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Hey!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 You are never going to believe what happened to me today.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 What?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Ralph Lauren called again and they offered   me more money.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 They did?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Yeah. It was the weirdest thing. Zelner called me and he said we'll   do everything we can to get you back. And that I should thank some Ron... I   don't even know what department that guy's in.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 So, what are you gonna do?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Well, I took it.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 That's great! So you're staying in New York!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Both	 YAY! WHOO! YAY!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 You're excited, right?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	  Ye-ah. Yeah! You know, the money's great.   It's certainly the easier choice...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Right!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to   Paris? Sure. You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital   of the world? Ooh, absolutely... Oh...! Yeah, but you know, this is... it's   fine. I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of   that I possibly can... 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Uhm, I hadn't no you... I had no idea you were so excited about Paris.   Uhm, I mean, you said you were scared.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Well yeah, but I mean, it was good scared though, you know? Like when   I-moved-to-New-York scared. Or uhm, when I-found-out-I-was-gonna-have-Emma scared...   But this is... fine. This is gonna be good. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	  You should go.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 What?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 It's what you want. You should go.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 You really think so?
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 I really do.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 But I already told Zelner that I would come back...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	  I'm sure he'll   understand.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 All right. ALL RIGHT! I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna go to Paris.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeah...
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Yeah! I'm going to Paris. Thank you, Ross!
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Yeah, yeah, oh! 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Rachel	 Oh! Oh, I'm so happy.
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Ross	 Then I'm happy too. 
10	15	1015	The One Where Estelle Dies	Joey	 Thank you all for coming. We're here today to pay respects   to a wonderful agent and a beautiful woman...    ..inside. As Estelle's only two clients we would like to say a few words.  Dude, where's   my speech?  That is   entertaining. Al Zebooker everybody. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 All right, all right, all right, let's play one more time, ok? And remember, if I win you do not move to Paris.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Ok! Can't believe I'm risking  this again, but you're on! All right Joe, you remember the rules! Heads I win, tails you lose.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Just flip!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Ha, tails!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Damnit!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Hey!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Hey!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 So we thought we'd throw you little going away party around seven.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh, that sounds good!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Hey, Rach, you're leaving tomorrow, shouldn't you be packing?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 It's all done!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh, yeah, right! And after I took a shower this morning I just threw my towel on the floor! Oh God, it hurts to even joke about it.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I know... Honey, seriously, I did it all. The luggage that I'm taking is in the bedroom, this is Emma's Paris stuff, these are the boxes that I'm having shipped, and that's the sandwich that I made for the plane...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Ok,  so you've done some good work!  What about your carry-ons?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh, well. Everything that I need  is in here and my travel documents are on the counter organized in the order that I will be needing them.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh my God! I have nothing left to teach you! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Where's your passport?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 It should be right next to my plane ticket.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Well, it's not.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 What? Maybe I put it in here . Oh, oh, it's not in there! Oh, no! I must have packed it in one of these boxes!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Here, let me help you. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Shoot. Oh, I can't believe I did this!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 At what point did it stop being funny that I took her passport?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh, wow, can you believe you're like three weeks away?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 I know.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 You don't mind me touching your belly, do you?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 No, I don't mind you touching my belly, but right now your hand is kind of blocking the part where the baby is gonna come out.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hey! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Hi.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hey Erica, welcome back to town!  Wow, look how big you've gotten.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 That's because I'm pregnant!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Right, no, I understand.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Oh, ok.  I'm just always afraid that people think I'm just fat with big breasts. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 No, no, I knew .
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Okay, well, stop staring at them.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 She brought them up!  I didn't realize you were coming back so soon!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Hey, well, in a couple of weeks I won't be able to travel.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Yeah, and I wanted her to get to know the doctors and get settled into the hotel.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hotel? Why isn't she staying with you guys?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Because we're moving in a couple of days and it just didn't make sense.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Plus hotels are fun! My room has this little fridge full of free snacks!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Erica, those things aren't free. In fact they have one of the highest mark-ups of any consumer product...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Ross! She's giving us her baby. She can eat you if she wants.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 I'll be right back.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Oh man, I can't believe you guys are leaving this place.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh, I know. I know. Hey, you know, you can take it if you want! The lease is still in Nana's name.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 No, no. This will always be your place. It would be too sad. Plus, how much a month does it cost  to feed Joey?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Yeah, it takes two incomes.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hey, is Chandler here? We talked about catching a movie.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh, no. He doesn't have time for that. But if you want, you can go help him and Joey pack up the guest room.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Mhm,  packing - sexy cheerleader comedy.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Mhm, helpful brother - creepy loner at teen movie.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 What are you guys doing?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Try it, I can't feel a thing! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Are, are you kidding? This is packing?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 We're taking a break!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 From?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Jumping on the bed?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 All right, Rachel's party is in a couple of hours and there's a lot to do. Now, Ross, you got Geller blood, you're in charge of these yahoos!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 You got it! . All right, she's right, we gotta get serious.  Let's put styrofoam peanuts down his pants and kick him!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 No, no, no, guys. She's right. We should get to work. I'll take stuff out of the closet, Joey you pack 'em and Ross you re-pack whatever Joey packs.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 You guys hear a ringing?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	  What the hell is this?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Hey! Handcuffs! And fur line, nice! I didn't know you guys had it in ya!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Chandler, you don't have a sister so you can't understand how much this bums me out.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 I didn't know Monica had these!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Mhm, maybe she used them with another boyfriend. Maybe Richard!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Why would she use them with Richard and not me? I can be kinky! I once did a naked dance for her... with scarves!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Bumming hard, guys, bumming hard.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Hey!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Hey! Where's Mike?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Oh, he has a gig. I kinda like being married to a rock star, you know. My husband has a gig.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Yeah? Yeah, where is it?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Oh, he's playing organ for a children's roller-skating party.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Rock on!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Wow, this is quite a spread!  What is all this stuff?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Well, I thought this would be a great opportunity to use up all the food that I don't want to move to the new house with me! So, enjoy: smoke oyster casserole with a breakfast cereal crust, kidney beans in their own juices, and for dessert, a questionable orange.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	  Hey.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Hey.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hey, where's Rach?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Oh, she's putting Emma down, she'll be over in a second.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Great.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Now it just hit her that she's leaving and she's kind of emotional so no one say anything to set her off, ok?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Yeah.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Everybody	 Hey Rach, hey you.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Here she is!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Hi you guys!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 What did I just say?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 No, no, no. It's ok. I'm gonna be fine.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Come here, I'll make you a drink.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Oh, man! I can't believe she's actually leaving. How am I gonna say goodbye to Rachel?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 I know, she's been such a big part of my life. And it feels like when Melrose Place got cancelled.  I mean... oh, forget it. I miss Melrose Place!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 You know, I had a chance to stop her too!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Yeah?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Who loses fifty seven coin tosses in a row? Head she wins, tails I lose.  Wait a minute...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Yes, Joe?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 I forgot to pick up my dry cleaning!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 You doing ok?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Well, I've been better.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Uh-hmm.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 You guys are gonna come and visit me, right?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Yes! You know, in six months the Statute of Limitations runs out and I can travel internationally again!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I'm gonna miss you so much.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 I know.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 You know what? Uhm, I have some goodbye stuff that I wanted to say to each of you and I was gonna save it until the end of the night, but come here .
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Hey, what do you think they're doing in there?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Huh, if I had to  guess I'd say Rachel is putting on the bubble wrap and Phoebe is doing the punching.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh, Pheebs, I don't even know where to start.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Ok well, before you do, I know we weren't supposed to get you going away presents,   but I do have something for you.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh, oh. . What is this?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 It's a cotton swab with a bit of my saliva on it, so that if they perfect the cloning process while you are over there, you can use the DNA to create your own Pheebs!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I'm gonna throw this away, but thank you so much for the gesture! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Chandler? I was just in our bedroom and I found these  on my pillow.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Oh, yes. I decided to leave these out for you in case Richard stops by and you wanna  engage on a little light bondage and moustache play! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 What are you talking about? These aren't mine.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Oh yeah, right! Good luck getting another scarf dance from  me!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 That would be a terrible punishment. But, I'm serious, I've never seen these before.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Really? Then what are they doing in our guestroom?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Rachel used to live in that room.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Rachel... with handcuffs! Interesting! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Joey's bare ass!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 . Well played.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I love you Phoebe.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 I love you too.  Please don't... Don't turn into... you know... French bitch! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 All right. Well, if I gonna do this, I'd better keep going.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Ok.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Ok. Monica?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Yeah?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Can you come here with me for a minute?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Sure.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	  Are you wearing waterproof mascara?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 No.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Oh, you're so screwed. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	  Hey. What was that all about?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 She's gonna say goodbye to each of us individually.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Are you kidding? Oh my God...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, I know, it's gonna be even worse for you... God... Ross, get ready to do some serious crying.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Oh, man, I'm not going to be able to handle this.  Now I know how my students feel at the end of each year. And why they act out by giving me such bad evaluations.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Mon... Okay... I've gotta... just say what it is I'm gonna say... None of the amazing things that have happened to me in the last ten years, would have happened if it wasn't for you. No-one has been more like a sister to me...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 I know what you mean. You're like a sister to me too. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	  I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you... 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	  You're the best friend I ever had.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 What? 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I... I... I... 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 That is so sweet. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	  Oh no, she took down Monica... And I'm the crier in the family. Oh God! I could be next. Maybe she won't talk with me if it looks like we're deep in converstation. Oh, so that thing you said about the thing. It really made me think about that other thing.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Uh, Rach?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Well it's okay. Chandler is talking to her. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 I really made you think about that thing uh?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	  Uh, Rach... I think I have something that belongs to you. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	  Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 No, no, no... They're really yours. We... found them in your old room.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Well, these aren't mine. Maybe Monica used to use them with...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Don't say Richard! Well, if they're not Monica's and they're not yours, then whose are they?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Well, I think you're forgetting the kinkiest former resident of that room.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Pheebs!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	  Yeah!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 I think these are yours.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 These are not mine... Look how flimsy they are, come on! Good God! You try to hang a guy from a waterpipe with these, they'll snap like a piece of licorice.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	  Can I talk to you alone for a minute?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Sure.  You don't really handcuff guys to waterpipes do you?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Where do you think Mike really is?  
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh honey... 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Let me just say something... Because once we get into this, I'm gonna get all uncomfortable and probably make some stupid joke... I just want to say that I... I love you... And, I'm gonna miss you. And I'm so sad that you're leaving.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	  Oh, you know what? Let's not say anything else. I love you.  
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Ooh, not so tight...  I'm sorry, just give me one more chance.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Okay. Oh...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 I'm sor... Just go. Just go. I can't, I can't. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	  So, I guess you're next. You're ready?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 I don't think so. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Oh, you're definately not. I haven't cried like that in years.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 You cried yesterday at the six o'clock news.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 That old woman was being scammed by her mechanic. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 God! I can't believe she saved me for last.  Why are they taking so long? 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 I don't know. But, God, Joey seems to be handling it suprisingly well.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	All	 No, no, no, no!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Okay, here we go...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh...  Well...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Yeah...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I think I'm gonna take off.  
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Huh?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Oh, you guys. This was an amazing night. Thank you so much. I love you. Good night.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 What? I don't get a goodbye? 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	  Lucky bastard!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Unbelievable. She says goodbye to everyone but me.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Well, maybe she thought that with all of your history it could be, you know, implicit.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Well, it needs to be plicit.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 All right, let's think about this. I mean, there's got to be an explanation. Uh... did you do anything to make her mad? 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 No, I don't think so.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 You know, maybe she was just really spent from our talk. It was pretty intense.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Yeah. Mine too.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Mine was a humdinger  
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	  O-kay... I mean, don't I deserve anything? I mean, a few tears, a cursory hug?  NOT FROM YOU! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Ross, if you're this upset, you should go and talk to her.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 And say what? "You owe me a goodbye", I mean, he's got more pride than that.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 THE HELL I DO!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 I don't get a goodbye?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 What?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	  Everyone gets a goodbye but me? What have I got to do to get a goodbye, huh? Be best friends with you? Uh, go out with you? Have a baby with you? Oh wait a minute, wait a minute, I did all those things.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Ross...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Oh no, maybe it's me, I'm just not giving you enough credit. Uh, I mean it is difficult to say goodbye to five people. Uh, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, goodbye, good...  IT'S PHYSICALLY IMPOSSIBLE. You know what? After all we've been through, I can't believe this is how you want to leave things between us. Have a, have a good time in Paris. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 I hope Ross isn't too upset.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 I'm sure he's not more bummed out than I am.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Tell me about it.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Well, you can't say we don't know how to throw a party.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 All right, I think I'm gonna head out.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Uh, where do you think you're going?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 I thought I was going home to go to bed, but I'm sensing there's something less fun for me to do here.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 We're moving in a couple of days and we've got a lot of packing to do. It would be great if you guys could pitch in.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Joey and I can finish up in the guest room.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Oh, yeah, yeah, good idea. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh no! You and Phoebe are gonna help me in here.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	  You couldn't be cool. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Okay, we're gonna start in the kitchen. Plates get put into plate protectors and stacked ten to a box. The silverware gets bundled in rubber bands and then bubble wrapped. Got it?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe, Joey	 Yeah.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Good! Now I need you to be careful and efficient. And remember, if I am harsh with you, it is only because you are doing it wrong.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Hey Mon, I think I figured out whose handcuffs they are.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 You did? How?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Well, I was cleaning out the closet and I found some pictures of them... being used.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh my God! Let me see. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Who's that dirty old lady?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Monica's grandmother.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Nana liked it rough!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Hi!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	All	 Hey!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Come on here, have a seat.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 How was your night?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Oh, it was okay. I went to a movie with my cousin and then out for dinner. We went to this place that had... Ooh...  Hoo... ooh... Anyway, they had these really amazing cheeseburgers.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Erica, are you okay?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 Yeah, you know, maybe I ate too much. I keep getting these stomach aches. They come and go like every few minutes.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh my God!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Relax! We just get her some antacids.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 She doesn't have a stomach ache, she's in labor.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Oh my God!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Yeah, you got to get to the hospital.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 All right, Chandler get the coats. Erica let's go. Phoebe and Joey, keep packing! Oh my God we're gonna have a baby. All right. We're gonna have a baby! OH MY GOD, WE'RE GONNA HAVE A BABY! Oh God, oh God, I got to sit down, I got to sit down. Ooh! 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 Honey, it's gonna be okay.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	 You can do this. Just breathe.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Okay, okay... Okay, I feel a little better.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Erica	  Ooh! Are you sure?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Monica	 Oh... Yes, I'm sure. Oh honey, let's go. Okay bye everyone.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Chandler, wait, wait, wait...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Chandler	 What?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 If you get a second, find out where she got that cheeseburger.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 You really think I didn't say goodbye to you because I don't care?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 That's what it seemed like.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Fine, then why didn't you say something?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 Because it is too damn hard Ross. I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go... Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you mean more to me. So there, all right, there's your goodbye... Oh!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 Rach!
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 What?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Ross	 You keep, you keep... You can't...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Rachel	 WHAT?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 A little more.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 Okay. 
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 A little more, a little more.  A little more... All right. Okay, all right, let's do this.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 All right, ready?
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	 Yeah. All right, now give me your best shot.
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Phoebe	 All right, here it goes...
10	16	1016	The One With Rachel's Going Away Party	Joey	  Doesn't work... 
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Jennifer Aniston	 Previously on Friends.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Erica, are you okay?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Yeah, you know, maybe I ate too much. I keep getting these   stomach-aches. They come and go like every few minutes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Relax! We'll just get her some antacids.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 She doesn't have a stomach-ache. She's in labor!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 So if you think I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't   mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. It's because you   mean more to me.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Rach!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 What?!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Shh.. Go back to sleep. I have to go home.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh. This was amazing.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 It really was. You've learned some new moves!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, well, this guy at work gave me "Sex for Dummies" as a   joke.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Ah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Who's laughing now?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I know!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Breathe, breathe, breathe... Good.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Next time, can I say breathe?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 No, last time you said it like Dracula, and it scared her! Can   I get you anything? You want some more ice chips?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 No, I'm okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Alright, I'll be right back.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Where are you going?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 To use the bathroom.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 You can't leave me alone with her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 This is exactly the kind of social situation that I am not   comfortable with!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 What kind of social situation are you comfortable with?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 It's just that we've never spent any time, you know, alone   together.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 You'll be fine. Nah, you won't, but I'll be back in two   minutes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 So, ah... Any plans for the summer?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 I don't know. Maybe church-camp?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hah. May not wanna mention this. So, you ever wonder which   is worse, you know; going through labor or getting kicked in the nuts?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, it's just interesting. You know, because no one will   ever know, because no one can experience both.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 One of life's great, unanswerable questions. I mean, who   knows? Maybe there's something even more painful than those things? Like this.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Morning.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What's that?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 It's my house-warming present for Monica and Chandler.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 It's a baby chick and duck!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Uh-huh. And I named them Chick Jr. and Duck Jr.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I did not see that coming.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, I figure they'll love it at the new house, you know? It   has that big backyard. And then, when they get old, they can go to   that special farm that Chandler took the other chick and duck to.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah. It's a shame people can't visit there.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 That is the rule, though.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Guess what? You're almost an uncle!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, Erica went into labor last night. Monica and Chandler are   at the hospital right now!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, and I have a definite feeling it's gonna be a girl.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Phoebe, you were sure Ben was gonna be a girl.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Have you seen him throw a ball?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Is Rachel here?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Uh, I think she's still asleep. Hey, hey, how did it go with you   guys last night? She seemed pretty pissed at you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh, we, y'know, we worked things out.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What's that smile? Did something happen with you two?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, I'm not one to kiss and tell, but I'm also not one to have   sex and shut up. We totally did it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God. You and Rachel?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I know, it's pretty great.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 So what does that mean? Are you guys getting back together?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh, I.. I don't know. We didn't really get to talk.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 But do you wanna get back together?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I don't know. It was incredible. I mean, it just felt so right.   When I was holding her, I mean, I never wanted to let her go. You know   what? Yeah, I do. I wanna be together.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  YAY!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Shhh!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Yay!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 So, so is she still going to Paris?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Wow, I hadn't thought of that. I hope not.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, this is like the best day ever. Ever! You guys might get   back together, Monica and Chandler are getting their baby, there are   chicks and ducks in the world again! Oh, I feel like I'm in a musical!    "Daa - raa... When the sun comes up, bright and beaming! And   the moon comes..."
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Morning!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Guess we'll never know how it ends.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey. How did you sleep?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Good. You?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Good.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 I bet you did!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh. Would you guys mind giving us a minute?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Sure, yeah. Will you just keep an eye on the chick and the duck?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Chick and the duck? Didn't they die...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Dive. Yeah, they dove head-first into fun on   the farm.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 So...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Morning.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 You too. Last night was just wonderful.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 It really was.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I woke up today with the biggest smile on my face.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I know, me too. It was... You know, it was like one of those   things you think is never gonna happen, and then it does, and it's   everything you want it to be.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Uh-huh. I know. It was just, it was just the perfect way to say goodbye. 
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 It's just a little bit more, honey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Help me! This hurts!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Is it really that bad?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Uh-huh! I think it's time to kick you in the nuts and see which   is worse!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 The baby's head is crowning.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh! Oh my God! That is the most beautiful top of a head I have   ever seen! Chandler, you have to see this!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I'm okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler, you don't wanna miss this. This is the birth of your   child! It's the miracle of life!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Alright. Wow, that is one disgusting miracle.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Start pushing. Here we go. Here come the shoulders...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 It's a... It's a boy!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Wow!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Is he okay?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 He's just fine.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, you did it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  It's a baby! A beautiful little baby! And some  other stuff I'm gonna pretend I don't see.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Would you like to cut the umbilical cord?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, that's spongy.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  Oh, hey handsome! Oh, I'm gonna love you so much  that no woman is ever gonna be good enough for you!  Oh, we are so lucky!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I know. He has your eyes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I mean, I know that's not possible, but he does.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Nurse	 We'll just get him cleaned up a bit.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  Oh my God, he's beautiful. Thank you so much.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 I'm really happy for you guys.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 How do you feel?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 I'm tired!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Well, you don't have that much time to relax. The other one   will be along in a minute.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I... I'm sorry, who should be along in a what now?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 The next baby should be along in a minute.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 We only ordered one!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 You know it's twins, right?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, yeah! These are the faces of two people in the know!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 I can't believe you didn't know it's twins! This has never   happened before.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, gosh. That makes me feel so special and good.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  Wait, did you know it was twins?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Yeah, it's here in the paperwork we got from the clinic in   Ohio.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  Anybody tell you?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 I don't think so. Although, they did mention something about   two heartbeats. But I thought that was just mine and the baby's. They   kept saying both heartbeats are really strong, and I thought well,   that's good 'cause I'm having a baby.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 This is unbelievable.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Twins actually run in my family.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Interesting!  Can I see you for a second?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 What do we do?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 What do you mean "what do we do"?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  Twins! Twins!!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Chandler, you're panicking!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Uh-huh! Join me, won't you?! Okay, what do you say we keep  one, and then just like have an option on the other one?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 We can't split them up!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Why not? We could give each of them half a medallion, and   then years later, they'll find each other and be reunited. I mean,   that's a great day for everybody.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay, what if the person who adopts the other one is horrible?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 What if they're not? What if it's adopted by a king?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, because I hear the king is looking to adopt.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Monica, we are not ready to have two babies!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 That doesn't matter! We have waited so long for this. I don't   care if it's two babies. I don't care if it's three babies! I don't   care if the entire cast of "Eight is Enough" comes out of there! We   are taking them home, because they are our children!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  Okay. Shhh...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 It looks like we're about ready over here.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Come on, Erica, start pushing again now.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Ow!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Here she comes!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  She? It's a girl?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Doctor	 Yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  Well, now we have one of each!    And that's enough!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 And then she said it was the perfect way to say goodbye.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God! What did you say?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Nothing! What do you say to that?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ross, you've got to tell her how you feel!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No way!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 You can't just give up! Is that what a dinosaur would do?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Dude, I'm just trying to speak your language.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ross, Rachel doesn't know that you wanna get back together. If   she did, she might feel differently. She might not even go.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 You really think so?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I'm telling you! Oh, okay! This is the part of the musical   where there'd be a really good convincing song.  "Bam-bam,   don't take no for an answer. Bam-bam, don't let love fly away.   Bam-bam-bam-bam..."
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hi!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Can't a girl finish a song around here?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hi! So I just dropped Emma off at my mom's.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh, you're not taking her with you tonight?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 No, we decided that I would go ahead and set up first, and   then my mom would bring Emma to Paris on Sunday.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Wow, eight hour flight with a one-year old? Good luck, mom.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Are you kidding? Eight hours with my mother talking about   Atkins? Good luck, Emma!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Alright, you know what? You're right. I should at least tell her  how I feel.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Ross, wait!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What? What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Could you get me a muffin?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gunther	 Rachel?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gunther	 I... I know you're leaving tonight, but I just have to tell  you. I love you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gunther	 I... I don't know if that changes your plans at all, but I  thought you should know.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Gunther... Oh... I love you too. Probably not in the  same way, but I do. And, and when I'm in a café, having coffee, or I  see a man with hair brighter than the sun, I'll think of you. Aw.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh... Bye guys.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Unbelievable!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, you know what might help?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I'm not getting you a muffin!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Do you think they recognize each other from in there?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Maybe. Unless they're like two people who have lived in   apartments next to each other for years, and then one day they're   pushed through a vagina and they meet.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Nurse	 We're going to take Erica to recovery now.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 There's something that we wanna tell you. We decided to name   the girl-baby Erica.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Oh my God, that's just like my name!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Son of a gun, it is!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Anyway, I'm gonna go and get some rest. I'm really glad I   picked you guys. You're gonna make great parents. Even Chandler.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay, well, bye!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Bye!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Bye!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 We'll call you!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Erica	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Have fun at church-camp!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, look at these little bunnies!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I know! You ready to trade?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Alright, let's see..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 We could trade later.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, I'm good.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey, what are you working on?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 It's a... It's a "welcome home" sign for the baby.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 How sweet! Oh, is that the baby?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 No, I sat in the paint.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey. So, did you talk to Rachel?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, and I'm not going to.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Why not?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Because she's just going to shoot me down. You guys saw what   happened with Gunther. That did not look like fun.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 How can you compare yourself to Gunther? I mean, sure, he's   sexy in a more obvious way. You have a relationship with her, you   slept together last night.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, and she still wants to go! It's pretty clear where she is.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, I know what you mean. I mean, sometimes...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Uh, Joe?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Damn it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Look, even if I were gonna tell her, I don't have to do it now.   Okay? I'll be seeing her again. We've got time.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No, you don't! She's going to Paris! She is going to meet   somebody. Do you know how many hot guys there are in Paris? It's...   It's a city of Gunthers!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Mike	 Hey!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey! What do you have there?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Mike	 Oh, I made a little something. If I had more time to work on it,   it'd be better, but..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God! You did that yourself?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Honey, that's gorgeous!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 You know, the baby can't read, Mike!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hi! You guys, the car-service just got here. I can't believe  they're not home yet! I have to catch my stupid plane. I wanna see the  baby!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Monica just called from the cab. She said they should be here  any minute. And apparently, there's some big surprise.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, did she sound happy about it? 'Cause my friend Ethel's  baby was born with a teeny, tiny beard.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hi! Oh my gosh!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe, Ross, Rachel	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	  Hey, so what is the big surprise?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 What... What...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, okay, awkward question. The hospital knows you took two,   right?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Yes, it's twins!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh, they're so cute! Now, what, what kinds are they?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  This is a boy,  and that's a girl.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Her name is Erica.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Aw..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, that pregnant girl's name was Erica.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah. It's a shame you two didn't get to spend more time  together.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, we named the boy Jack after dad.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Aw, he's gonna be so happy.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh, Jack Bing. I love that. Ooh, it sounds like a '40s  newspaper guy, you know? "Jack Bing, Morning Gazette. I'm gonna blow  this story wide open!"
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my gosh. Wow, so beautiful.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Mike	  I want one.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Oh yeah? Well, tell me which one, and I'll try slip it in my  coat.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Mike	 Seriously. Wanna make one of those?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 One? How about a whole bunch?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Mike	 Really?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah! Ooh, we could teach them to sing, and we can be like the  Von Trapp family! Only without the Nazis. Although that sounds kinda  dull.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, you guys, I can't believe this. But I'll leave now, or I'm  gonna miss my plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I'm just so glad you got to see the babies.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Me too. Oh, I'm just sorry I'm not gonna be around to watch  you two attempt to handle this! Alright, I can't say goodbye to you  guys again. I love you all so much.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I love you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I love you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Call us when you get there.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I will. Ross, come here.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I just want you to know.. Last night.. I'll never forget it.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Neither will I.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Alright, now I really have to go. Okay. Au revoir! Oh, they're   gonna really hate me over there.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 So, you just let her go?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey, maybe that's for the best.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah. You know? You just... Look, you gotta... You gotta think   about last night the way she does, okay? Maybe, maybe sleeping   together was the perfect way to say goodbye?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 But now she'll never know how he feels!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Maybe that's okay. You know? Maybe, maybe it is better this way?   I mean, now, now you can move on. I mean, you've been trying to for so  long, maybe now that you're on different continents..  Right?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Maybe now you can actually do it. You know? You can finally get  over her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, that's true. Except I don't wanna get over her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I don't! I wanna be with her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Really?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yeah, I'm gonna go after her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, you are!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Woo!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Wait, wait! Get your coat! Get your coat!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 My coat...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 This is so cool!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I have no idea what's going on, but I am excited!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 But Ross, Ross. What do you, what do you think she's going to  say?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I don't know, but I.. Look, even if she shoots me down, at least  I won't spend the rest of my life wondering what would have happened.  Where - where is my coat?!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You didn't bring one! My cab's downstairs, I'll drive you to  the airport.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, guys, wish me luck.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hurry!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Good luck, good luck!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 There's no seatbelt!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 That's okay. If - if we hit anything, the engine will explode,   so you know, it's better if you're thrown from the car.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Alright, alright, let's do this!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Man	 18th and East End.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I - I don't take passengers.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Man	 Hey! The law says you have to accept any fare.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, you don't understand. This isn't a real cab.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Man	 Alright, I gotta report you. What's your medallion number?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 My medallion number is, "Get out of the cab!"
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Man	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	  Get out of the cab!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Get out of the cab!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh, hey, hey, can I give you guys your house-warming present   now?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Now, that you can do.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Alright!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Ah... Chick Jr.? Duck Jr.? Don't hide from mama!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You can open your eyes now.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Are we off the bridge?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Is the old woman on the bicycle still alive?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yes, she jumped right back up.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God, Phoebe, slow down!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Do you wanna get to Rachel in time?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yes, but I don't wanna die in your cab!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You should have thought of that before you got in!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Toll-booth.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  Toll-booth! Four bucks. There are quarters in the   glove compartment.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hurry!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Damn, that window is clean.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Quack, quack, tweet, tweet, quack, quack, tweet, tweet, quack,  quack, tweet, tweet, quack, quack, tweet, tweet, quack, tweet, quack...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 We were wondering what was taking so long with the gift, but  now we understand you were doing this.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay, I wanted to surprise you, but for your house-warming gift,  I got you a baby-chick and a baby-duck!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Really? You got us a chick and a duck?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, great! Just what you want for a new house with infants.  Bird feces.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, yeah, they must have jumped off the table, 'cause now  they're gone!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, don't worry, we'll find them.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Actually, I'm gonna go check on the twins.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Alright.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh God! What did I just step on?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 It's okay, it's just an egg roll.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 You stepped on my egg roll?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I'm sorry, I didn't know to look for Chinese food on the   floor.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Just put it on a plate and leave.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Okay, let's find these birds.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Alright.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Wait, wait. Do you hear that?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh! They're in the table!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, that can't be good!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 We gotta get them out of there!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 How?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh, oh! Maybe we can lure them out. You know any birdcalls?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, tons, I'm quite the woodsman.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Well, maybe we can just tip the table a little.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Joey, wait! The ball!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh God! So what do we do?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I don't know. Maybe we can open this up somehow.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 No... It's all glued together.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Does that mean we have to bust it open?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I don't know. Maybe.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I know! It's.. It's the foosball table.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 All right, you know what? We don't have a choice. It's like I would   have said in that sci-fi movie if I'd gotten the part. "Those are our   men in there, we have to get them out! Even if I have to sacrifice the   most important thing in my life; my time-machine."
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Did that movie ever get made?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 It did not.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Ross, where are you going?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 To talk to Rachel, isn't that why we took a ride in the   death-cab?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 What? What are you just gonna walk up to her at the gate? Have   you never chased anyone through the airport before?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Not since my cop-show got cancelled.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You have to get a ticket to get past security.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What? We're never gonna make it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Not with that attitude! Now, haul ass!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, if you could all walk slower, that'd be great. 
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #1	  Madame, your passport   please?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God! I was so afraid I wasn't gonna remember any of my   high-school French, but I understood every word you just said!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #1	 Your boarding pass, please.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, shoot. I had it. Oh, I can't believe this.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #1	 Madame, if you don't have your boarding pass...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I have it, I have it, I have it. Oh, okay, I can't find it,   but I remember that I was in seat 32C, because that's my bra-size.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #1	 Madame, you must have your boarding pass..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay, fine! But you know what? If I was in 36D, we would not be having this problem. 
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, I need a ticket.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Just one? I drive you all the way down here, and I don't get   to see how it works out?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Fine, two tickets, I need two tickets.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 We're on our honeymoon.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ticket Agent	 And the destination?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I don't care. Whatever is the cheapest.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I'm so lucky I married you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh! Shoot! Damn it! Where is it? Oh! Oh! I found it! I found   it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hah! I found it! I told you I would find it! In your face! You're a different person. 
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, flight 421 to Paris. I don't see it, do you see it?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 No, did we miss it?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, no, no. That's impossible. It doesn't leave for another 20   minutes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Maybe we have the flight-number wrong. God.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Hello.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey, it's me. Here's Ross.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What? Hey, hey, listen..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh my God! Ross, you wouldn't believe the cute little noises   the twins are making. Listen.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Monica? Monica, Monica, Monica, Monica..?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, I'm sorry. Shoot, they were doing it before.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 That's alright. Listen, listen.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, wait, wait, wait! Here they go again.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Monica? Monica, Monica, Monica, Monica..?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Isn't that cute?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 That is precious! Listen! I need Rachel's flight information.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, okay. Alright, it's flight 421. Leaves at 8:40.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yes, that's what I have. It's not on the board.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 That's what it says here. Flight 421, leaves at 8:40, Newark   airport.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Newark airport. Why, where are you?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 JFK.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	  Don't worry, you guys, we're gonna get you out of   there.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 And we're also gonna buy you tiny, bird hearing-aids.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay. Here goes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 What's the matter?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 I need to say goodbye to the table first.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I understand.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay. Table, you have given us so many great times. And you   guys, Jordan, Victor, Joel... All of you guys. What can I say? You   guys make us look good. You wanna say anything?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I don't know. Except that, for one last time...  Good game, good game, good game,   good game, good game, good game, good game.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Okay, here we go. I can't do it.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, I can't do it either.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Hey! Did you find them?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, they're stuck inside the table!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 We have to bust it open, but neither of us can do it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, well sure. This gotta be so hard. I'll do it. Gimme!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Phoebe! Wow! No, no, no!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Well, I've never gone this fast before.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Phoebe, forget it, okay? Newark is - is like an hour away.   There's no way we're gonna make it in time.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 She's got her cell, you could call her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I am not doing this over the phone.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 You don't have any other choice!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Hello?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Rachel? Oh, good. Hey, by the way, did you just get on the   plane?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  For what it's worth, we would have caught her if we were at the right airport.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Yay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Uh, Rach, hang on.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Phoebe? Is everything okay?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Uhm, actually no. No, you've... You have to get off the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 What? Why?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I have this feeling that something's wrong with it. Something   is wrong with the left Philange.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, honey, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Alright, look, I have to go. I love you, and I will call you   the minute I get to Paris.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 Uhm, what was that?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh, that was just my crazy friend. She told me I should get   off the plane, because she had a feeling that there was something   wrong with the left Philange.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 Okay, that doesn't sound good.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I wouldn't worry about it. She's always coming up with stuff   like this, and you know what? She's almost never right.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 But she is sometimes.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Well...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Wait, what are you doing?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 Well, I can't take this plane now.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	 Excuse me, sir, where are you going?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 I have to get off this plane, okay? Her friend has a   feeling something's wrong with the left Philange.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Could I get some peanuts?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #2	 What's wrong with the plane?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	 There's nothing wrong with the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 Yeah! The left Philange!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	 There is no Philange!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 Oh my God. This plane doesn't even have a Philange!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #2	 I'm not flying on it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	 Ma'am, please sit down!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #3	 What's going on?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #1	 We're all getting off. There is no Philange!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 This is ridiculous! I...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah, okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Alright. My job here is done.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 That was... Impressive.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah, you didn't even use the tools for most of it!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Yeah, they were just slowing me down. Alright, I have to get   back to the babies. I'll see you girls later.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Sorry about the table, man.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 You gonna buy a new one?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Probably not. Nah. I don't know how much I'm gonna wanna play   after you go.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Well, at least we got these little guys out.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Aww, we were worried about you! Hm. I guess I better get   used to things crapping in my hand, huh?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 I'm gonna miss these little guys. It was nice having birds   around again.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Hey, you know what? Maybe we should keep them here with you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Yeah, I mean we've got a lot going on right now. And, plus,   here they'd have their own room.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 I could get a goose!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 You know, I - I think you're set with the poultry.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Thanks man. Did you hear that, you guys? You're gonna get to   stay here! And, and it's good, you know, 'cause, 'cause now you have a   reason to come visit.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 I think there may be another reason. So, awkward hug or lame   cool guy handshake?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Uh, lame cool guy handshake, yeah.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 Ma'am, I assure you, the plane is fine.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Passenger #2	 And you fixed the Philange?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 Yes, the Philange is fixed. As a matter of fact, we   put a whole lot of extra Philanges onboard, just in case.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Where is she?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I don't see her.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Rachel! Rachel Green!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 There she is!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Rachel! Rachel!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 Wow, excuse me, sir, do you have a boarding pass?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, no, I just have to talk to someone.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 I'm sorry, you cannot go any further without a   boarding pass.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, no, no, but...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	  RACHEL!!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God... What.. What are you guys doing here?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Okay, you're on.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 What? What? Ross, you're scaring me. What's going on?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Okay, the thing is..
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yeah?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Don't go.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 What?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Please, please stay with me. I am so in love with you. Please,   don't go.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Oh my God.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I know, I know. I shouldn't have waited 'till now to say it, but   I'm.. That was stupid, okay? I'm sorry, but I'm telling you now. I   love you. Do not get on this plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 Miss? Are you boarding the plane?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Hey, hey. I know you love me. I know you do.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Gate Attendant #2	 Miss?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I - I have to get on the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, you don't.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Yes, I do.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No, you don't.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 They're waiting for me, Ross. I can't do this right now, I'm   sorry. I'm sorry.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Rachel?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I'm so sorry.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I really thought she'd stay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 I'm sorry.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Well, that's it. Everything's packed.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Wow, this is weird.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I know.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah. Uh, does this mean there's nothing to eat?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 I put three lasagnas in your freezer.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 I love you!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Hey!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 So did you guys make it in time?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Yeah, yeah, he talked to her, but she got on the plane anyway.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Where's Ross?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 He went home. He didn't want to see anybody.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Ross, hi. It's me. I just got back   on the plane. And I just feel awful. That is so not how I wanted   things to end with us. It's just that I wasn't expecting to see you,   and all of a sudden you're there and saying these things... And... And   now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have   said, and I didn't. I mean, I didn't even get to tell you that I love   you too. Because of course I do. I love you. I love you. I love you.   What am I doing? I love you! Oh, I've gotta see you. I've gotta get   off this plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Oh my God!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Excuse me?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	  Miss? Please, sit down!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, but I   need to get off the plane, okay? I need to tell someone that I love   love them.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	  Miss, I can't let you off   the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Let her off the plane!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Air Stewardess	  I am afraid you are gonna   have to take a seat.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh, please, miss, you don't   understand!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Try to understand!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any   way that you can just let me off...
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 No! No! Oh my God. Did she get off the plane? Did she get off   the plane?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I got off the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 You got off the plane.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I do love you.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 I love you too, and I'm never letting you go again.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay. 'Cause this is where I wanna be, okay? No more messing   around. I don't wanna mess this up again.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Me neither, okay? We are - we're done being stupid.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay. You and me, alright? This is it.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 This is it. Unless we're on a break.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Don't make jokes now.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Okay, please be careful with that. It was my grandmother's. Be   careful.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 If that falls off the truck, it wouldn't be the worst thing.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Wow.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 I know. It seems smaller somehow.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Has it always been purple?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	  Look around, you guys. This was your first   home. And it was a happy place, filled with love and laughter. But   more important, because of rent control, it was a friggin' steal!
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 Hey, do you realise that at one time or another we all lived   in this apartment?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, yeah, that's true.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Uh, I haven't.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Wait a minute. What about that summer during college that you   lived with grandma, and you tried to make it as a dancer?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Ross	 Do you realise we almost made it ten years without that coming   up?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 Oh, honey, I forgot. I promised Treeger that we'd leave our   keys.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Phoebe	 So, I guess this is it.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Joey	 Yeah. I guess so.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	  This is harder than I thought it would be.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Oh, it's gonna be okay.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	  Do you guys have to go to the new house right away,   or do you have some time?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Monica	 We got some time.
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Rachel	 Okay, should we get some coffee?
10	17-18	1017-18	The Last One, Part I & II	Chandler	 Sure. Where?
